#might do one for a future apathy

[galene-gothic]

𝖸𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗌

ˏˋ༻ʚ♡︎ɞ༺ˎˊ˗             PAID SERVICES TIP JAR

SUMMER SALE

Note: In regard to romantic relationships.

⊹ ! ೀ Pile 1 ꒱

You’re someone who has undergone nostalgia, apathy, discontent and boredom in the past, and has come out of it. Due to this, you try to be present and know how to leave the past behind you. You’ve undergone a lot of growth emotionally and have accepted the situations that occurred as well as yourself, and your own nature so you’re ready to move forward and know your responsibilities. There’s awareness of how regretful you are about having wasted your time in discontent and negative focus instead of being present because those days, that time won’t come back again. You’ve released so many negative emotions and have had to deeply reset your mindset which is not child’s play. Most people stay stuck in the way they are their entire life because they simply can’t bring themselves to change and would rather live in ignorance, and misery but you have pulled yourself out of such a rut and have a desire to truly live. The thing about living is that, the past is gone, the future is not here yet, the only thing we have is the present moment so living is about being in the present moment. “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans” as they say. You’re aware of this and try to be present. That’s your active focus. You’re also someone who knows when change may be needed and you try to bring it about despite discomfort because you’ve already changed yourself very deeply, and overcome what had you consumed, stuck, and trapped. You don’t have the heart to put the one who’s actively choosing you and loving you below anyone. You’re not going to think of some great past love that could not even stick through the test of time as the greatest love you’ve ever had. You’re going to let them go completely, cherishing and loving only the one who is right in front of you because you now know that you deserve a love that is present, and chooses you over and over again, and want to offer the same love to your partner. The concept of ‘exes’ is not a real thing for you anymore. You tend to be grateful for what you already have and who you already have because you seek contentment and enlightenment in life after all the negativity that you’ve put yourself through. You see the positives in any negative situation and simply just possess a zest for life. You’re self aware in many ways because having experienced such negativity, you understand your own negative tendencies and you try to be self aware, and focused. Due to this trait of yours, when you get with someone, you’re still focused on yourself and the person in front of you rather than having your energy be all over the place. You’re also extremely contemplative because you had undergone a phase of negativity, nostalgia, overthinking, boredom, discontent and apathy, and have a lot of capacity to think and many interesting insights on life. You’re also someone who understands love in its most divine and sacred form. It is not just about love, you possess a lot of unique knowledge about many different matters because most people don’t have access to such divine knowledge or are just ignorant.

You’re a very intuitive partner and likely untouchable even when you’re single. You understand your partner and connect with them in a way in which you understand, and feel them on an almost psychic level. You understand their psyche, the conscious, subconscious and unconscious very well, and tend to be very in-tune with their higher needs. You experience love as something very divine and might even hold it as being sacred. I don’t think that you’re willing to share or experience such love with just anyone. You are the very definition of a divine feminine and if you don’t hold yourself, romance, and connections in general to a divine, and sacred standard, you’re either being nudged to do so, will grow into this as you tap into your love nature, should pick another pile or need to accept your true love nature based on your needs, desires and what you can give out. You’re very intelligent and wise, and what I find to be incredibly fascinating is that people might not get this side of you to its fullest or even be aware of its existence unless they get really close to you one on one, or especially unless they’re married to you. I am putting a very big emphasis on marriage here because some of you might be naturally hesitant to share certain things, certain moments of intimacy with those who you are not closely bonded with on a soul and life level, and even if you do, your present partner, your life partner will hold the highest place and will get access to your unique insights, and wisdom the most because they’ll be sharing their life with you and the amount of depth you have, the thoughts, the philosophies, the wisdom, the knowledge, everything that you possess is not something that people can experience and understand in a few months or years plus because of your desire, and ability to live in the present moment and your willingness to change for the better even if it’s hard, you tend to learn more and more from life, and attain more and more wisdom, and knowledge so people of the past don’t even know you. The ones who leave you do not really get to know, understand and experience you, and life with you in the way that the one you share your life with will. You are very feminine and possess a depth, and duality that may seem contradictory but that’s just the way you are. You end up channelling different sides of you depending on what side of you is needed but all of these sides exist in you so even if you may look really cute on the outside, on the inside, you can be the biggest freak or even if you present yourself as being dumb on the outside, you can be very intelligent, wise and aware on the inside, or even if you look very serious and stoic, you have a very playful, fun loving and cute side or even if you present yourself as very intelligent and strategic, you can be very innocent and naive on the inside because you function from genuineness and divinity, or even if you look or present yourself as being mature, emotionless and emotionally controlled, you possess a very sensitive, empathetic and crybaby side.

Honestly, you could relate to all of the above because you have experienced being who you are and that includes the contradictions, and the different views that people have had of you based on the image that you ended up projecting depending on what side of you you were channelling at that time. Those who stick around get to see and experience all of these sides. You’re also very observant and intuitive, recognising your partner’s needs and patterns. You can be a bit passive and not voice out all that you observe instead trying to help them through actions in whatever way you can, and even so, there’s some level of passivity. Many of you are untouchable and unattainable despite your desirability. Also, there’s likely a deep desire for sex and intimacy but in a sacred way in which you do it with the same person again, and again? I’m getting that you tend to be curious and seek knowledge not just about life, divinity or/and academics but also about sex and human connections. You want to do right by your partner at all times and know how to take accountability. You’re fair and accepting of whatever mistake you made, and you don’t mind having to take responsibility and apologise. In fact, if you have to deal with the consequences of your actions, you’ll be willing to do so too. However, you’re someone who desires such fairness for yourself as well. You’re not swayed by external factors, love or affection, you use your mind to make fair decisions and let people deal with the consequences of their actions rather than negotiating every single time. You also have this odd ability in which you can subconsciously pick up on something being off and the future of the connection being not so bright. For example, if you’re being deceived, even if you’re not aware of it yet, you might suddenly get the urge to block them and never talk to them again. You treat your partner as an equal and don’t mind compromising for the greater good. You have a lot of integrity, causing you to try to fulfil your duties within the relationship to the best of your abilities. You usually don’t betray your relationship and partner in any way but even if you do something that you’re not proud of or could cost you the relationship, you are honest with them. You won’t take away their right to make a decision for themself. You’ll give them all the factors needed for them to make a choice for themself, by themself. You deeply desire and require such fairness from your significant other too. You’re a truth seeker and do not appreciate or enjoy being deceived and blindsided. You’re also very decisive and once you decide that you want someone, you stick by it. You feel a great deal of love towards them and you’re clear in that. You also make the right decisions with fairness and integrity. You know how to communicate effectively and you place a really strong emphasis on understanding. You know that communication will do nothing for a couple unless they possess a basic understanding of each other, a desire to understand each other and want to do right by each other.

You have had a breakthrough, a realisation that people in the world are not as honest and fair as you are, and that there will always be people who will deceive you. Some of them may lie to you while the others may just leave details out, either way, it is deception. So you seek clarity and truth in relationships, and have grown a certain resilience. Breakthroughs and realisations about other people’s deception towards you used to hurt you deeply in the past, and they still will if you find out but you’d rather have that over living in a lie, in deception, in an illusion. You have developed a certain resilience around such matters and will be glad to have clarity, and enlightenment and will make the best possible choice for yourself, choosing to be fair with yourself in such situations. You will also attain knowledge and wisdom from these situations. You’re very playful and pure in romance. You likely need a partner who you can admire and look up to but also makes your inner child feel safe because you have a tendency to act very childish in relationships. You love in an innocent manner with a lot of genuine emotional involvement. You tend to be smitten when in love and get flustered easily. The type to have a crush on your partner years into the relationship. This is honestly so adorable. You value intimacy and emotions, and enjoy doing things to display affection such as writing love letters, romantic messages, etc. You’re very affectionate and tender, and honestly a bit vulnerable, sensitive, and almost naive? Due to how genuinely and purely you love, you have zero tolerance for deception, and lies in your relationship. You will not even tolerate deception through leaving details out. When you love someone and when they hold the space for you to feel safe enough to be as childish, affectionate, pure, and tender as you want, you naturally open up and treat the connection as something sacred, intimate and pure, you just open up, and give all of yourself away without reservations, just pure love. You also treat your partner with a lot of reverence. You’re very childlike and sensitive, and very affectionate and tender, and might cry easily with your partner as well as joyfully joke, dance and laugh around with them. You tend to play with your partner, as in, have light hearted fun like an actual child and find new ways to communicate with them in witty, and affectionate ways. For example, notes around the house, notes in their locker or textbook, discussing different topics ranging from playful jabs and jokes to deep, and insightful conversations and even your tone might change. You might speak in a sweet but high pitched tone with a childish cadence sometimes but a grounded, deeper and more serious tone at other times. You’re also very romantic, flirty and almost obsessive but unattainable, and they’re the only one who gets access to this side of you.

When it comes to your cons, you’re someone who worries a lot. In the past, you had connections that ended suddenly or didn’t progress past a certain point, or things were just moving awfully slowly despite you providing a lot of value and service to the other person, and it has left deep wounds in your psyche. You tend to be fearful and paranoid. The other person was not taking action and just lacked the passion, energy, and drive to try with you and you were left directionless. This situation or possibly even multiple situations was very stagnant. They could have fed off your comfort and assistance just to pull the “I’m busy” card when they found someone else, and many of you weren’t even given the truth in that situation, you had to find out by yourself so well, you felt deceived, used, discarded and you couldn’t even complain about it because you felt like you had put yourself into that situation by sticking around for so long. You were craving both comfort and stimulation at that time so you connected with these people in a very fun, almost childlike manner and were not taken seriously. I don’t think that it was a you problem at all but the only con that I’m personally getting here is your negative thinking due to your past experiences. You have intense negative emotions come up from a very deep seated place. You overthink a lot and have your mental health fall apart when in a relationship. You seem to have dealt with public/social humiliation, having people gang up on you or gossip about you because of someone you were involved with. It could have been that others decided that you were not good enough for your partner or your partner publicly betrayed you causing you to be the butt of the joke. Either way, it was incredibly humiliating and left a very toxic effect on you. It’s like, supposing you ate something toxic, even if you took an anecdote, the toxins remained in your system, that’s how it is with you. I got so many qualities for your pros but for your cons, there’s a big focus on your fears, paranoia, anxieties and deep seated negative beliefs, and the other cards are only there to support it. You seek and desire the truth, and have been left scorned in the past so you are a bit bitter about it still and tend to be very critical of your partner. In fact, before you even get with them. you’re already criticising them. “You found someone more exciting, the next second, you were gone and you left me there crying, wondering what I did wrong. You said I’m never satisfied but I don’t think it’s true cause all I ever wanted was to be enough. Don’t you think I loved you too much to be used and discarded? Don’t you think I loved you too much to think I deserve nothing?” By this point, you’re aware that not all your thoughts and beliefs are true but you still fear that the history will repeat itself. You fear that people will not take you seriously but will still use you for what you can do for them and what comfort you can provide for them just to not even be honest with you, and lead you on while you were simply just trying to respect their pace. You fear that you’ll feel discarded, used, scorned, naive, unimportant, unwanted, undesired and undesirable. Your only con is that you will either keep this to yourself, sabotage the relationship and hurt yourself silently, or will drive your partner crazy with all this negativity and intensity.

Pros:

i) Tries to be present because you have dealt with not being so

ii) Notices when and where change is needed, and brings it about even if it is hard or takes time

iii) Has already dealt with being stuck in the past and the nostalgic “I’ll never get over this”, “I’ll never love anyone like that again”, “I’ll never forget ___” or/and “what if I never find love again?” phase and regrets having wasted time like that, and desires present love in the present moment and is capable as well as willing to give it back

iv) Cherishes present love and leaves the past in the past, possibly considering past love to not have been real because of the discontent, pain and the feeling of being lost that it caused

v) Has grown significantly emotionally and continues doing so

vi) Is unwilling to be consumed by anything unless it’s present and shows the promise of being present in the future but even so, if it leaves, you’re willing to leave it behind and find something that is present, and cherish it wholeheartedly instead

vii) Your main priority is the one right in front of you and you are present with them, cherishing, and loving them wholeheartedly, not putting them beneath anyone else in your heart and life

viii) You know how to be grateful or at least try to be and seek contentment, pleasure, and enlightenment in the present moment

ix) Sees the positives in negative situations and tries to maintain a positive focus

x) Self aware about one’s negative tendencies and a willingness to gain more self awareness

xi) You try to keep your focus on yourself, your life, being present and your own partner, wanting to cherish them, and actively fulfill your responsibilities towards them

xii) Extremely contemplative and has interesting, and insightful philosophies and thoughts on life due to having contemplated deeply in the past

xiii) Possesses a strong capacity to think

xiv) Has many interesting insights on life

xv) Someone who understands love in its most divine and sacred form

xvi) Understands partner and connects with them in a way in which you understand, and feel them on an almost psychic level

xvii) Divine feminine and a very deep personality

xviii) Highly intelligent and wise

xix) Depth not easily accessible to others: only fully revealed in close, soul-level connections (especially in marriage)

xx) Selective with intimacy and emotional sharing

xxi) Continuously evolving through a commitment to self-growth and living in the present

xxii) Deeply feminine with a rich inner world

xxiii) Embody contrasting traits, such as:

- Cute appearance vs. deep internal complexity

- Seeming naive or playful vs. being actually strategic and insightful

- Stoic exterior vs. emotional sensitivity

- Intelligent presentation vs. innocent inner nature

- Multifaceted personality, channeling different sides as needed

xxiv) Those who stay close get to experience your full depth

xxv) Observant and highly intuitive

xxvi) Supportive through actions more than words, with a tendency toward passivity

xxvii) Desirable yet emotionally or spiritually unattainable to many

xxviii) Craves deep, sacred intimacy, particularly with one consistent partner

xxix) Curious and seeking knowledge across diverse areas (life, divinity, human connection, sexuality)

xxx) Accountable and fair, willing to admit mistakes and accept consequences

xxxi) Desires mutual fairness in relationships

xxxii) Emotionally grounded, makes decisions based on reason rather than being swayed by affection or manipulation

xxxiii) Able to detect misalignment or deception even subconsciously with instinctive urges (like cutting off contact)

xxxiv) Deeply genuine, operating from a place of authenticity and spiritual alignment

xxxv) You treat your partner as an equal and don’t mind compromising for the greater good

xxxvi) Strong sense of integrity and fulfill your relationship duties to the best of your ability

xxxvii) You are honest, respecting your partner’s right to make their own decisions by being fully transparent

xxxviii) You deeply desire and need the same level of fairness and honesty from your partner

xxxix) You are a truth seeker and cannot stand deception or being blindsided

xl. You are decisive in love - once you choose someone, you remain loyal and clear in your affection

xli. You make relationship decisions with fairness, clarity and integrity

xlii. You communicate effectively and value deep mutual understanding over surface-level conversation

xliii. You believe that real communication requires the will to understand and do right by one another

xliv. Have had a breakthrough about the dishonesty of others and learned to accept painful truths over comforting illusions

xlv. You’ve built resilience around deception and now choose clarity, even if it hurts

xlvi. You grow wiser and more grounded from such experiences, always choosing fairness toward yourself

xlvii. In romance, you are playful, pure-hearted and emotionally genuine

xlviii. You need a partner who you can admire but who also nurtures your inner child

xlix. You tend to act very childlike in love with innocent affection and emotional sincerity

l. You get easily flustered and smitten, having a crush on your partner even years into the relationship

li. You value intimacy, affection and emotional expression through romantic gestures like love letters and messages

lii. You are extremely affectionate, tender and emotionally vulnerable in love

liii. Your love is so pure that you have zero tolerance for lies, even lies by omission

liv. When someone makes you feel emotionally safe, you open up completely and love without reservation

lv. You treat the connection as sacred, giving your all with purity and reverence

lvi. You enjoy lighthearted playfulness with your partner

lvii. You find creative and witty ways to connect, such as leaving notes or using playful tones in conversation

lviii. You’re deeply romantic almost obsessive in your love but emotionally and spiritually unattainable to most, making your partner feel uniquely chosen as the only one with access to this side of you

Cons:

i) You worry excessively and tend to overthink, often allowing fear and paranoia to dominate your emotional landscape

ii) You’ve internalized guilt for staying too long in unhealthy dynamics, blaming yourself for trusting and giving too much

iii) You are deeply scarred by emotional deception, especially when others masked disinterest with excuses like being “busy” while entertaining someone else

iv) You often weren’t given closure or truth; you had to uncover it yourself, further intensifying your trust issues

v) Your negative thinking, stemming from these past experiences, is your greatest con, it clouds your perception even when things are going well

vi) Intense, deep-seated negative emotions can surface suddenly and powerfully, often overwhelming you

vii) Your mental health may decline during a relationship due to these unhealed traumas and emotional instability

viii) You’ve experienced public or social humiliation related to a partner perhaps being gossiped about or made to feel inferior

ix) You may have been betrayed publicly or treated as less-than, becoming the subject of ridicule or pity

x) These humiliating experiences linger like toxins in your system, creating emotional reactivity even when the current situation is safe or different

xi) While you are highly self-aware, your lingering bitterness and unresolved pain can make you critical of your partner even before they’ve done anything wrong

xii) You tend to project fears from your past relationships onto your current partner, expecting betrayal, abandonment or replacement

xiii) You question your worth and fear you’re not enough that others only value you for what you offer, not who you are

xiv) You doubt your desirability and fear being viewed as naive, unimportant or disposable

xv) Despite knowing your thoughts aren’t always rational, you struggle to fully trust love again and fear history repeating itself

xvi) This fear may manifest in two ways:

- You suppress it and suffer silently, slowly sabotaging yourself and the relationship, or

- You express it with overwhelming intensity, which may emotionally exhaust or alienate your partner

⊹ ! ೀ Pile 2 ꒱

Your pros are that you are intolerant to bullshit and have high standards for yourself, and others. You’re a bit ruthless when it comes to your standards even with yourself. You know how to be patient and build upon a connection with consistency, effort, and hard work. You’re perseverant and don’t give up easily. Once you’re invested, that is it, your commitment is unwavering. You also become so focused on building upon the connection through your own effort that in the past, you used to not notice that the other person was not doing the same. This is why you’ve developed such high standards as well. You are very keen on your own growth and want to live up to your own standards so you persevere in that way too. You are naturally a provider regardless of your sex. You prefer long term connections that are grounded and can be depended on, and naturally take on the role of someone reliable who can be depended upon. You value certain traditions and old school ways of doing relationships, and do not entertain dusties looking for a grounded, mature, wise provider who’s a reliable partner in every way. You genuinely can’t bring yourself to do so. You try to consistently better yourself and look for the same quality in your partner too. You are guided by values, principles and ethics, and want a partner like that too. I keep on getting that your standards can be considered really high by many but they’re actually completely grounded in reality. Why is it wrong of you to want a mature, loyal, ethical and responsible provider? You are someone who is naturally more focused on building yourself and your life i.e. money, character, career, all of it so you want a partner who’s similar in nature. Someone who is focused on looking after themself, their family, career, character and growth rather than looking at random girls everywhere. You cannot tolerate the mere idea of wandering eyes. You want to be respected and respectful of your partner so it’s very important for you to find someone who’s rich in character, focused on building themself, their life, money and career, values long term relationships, and does not have wandering eyes because otherwise, you’d not be able to respect them enough to be with them. However, you try to maintain as strong of a character as you can and are naturally a provider. You’re also someone who has already worked a lot on yourself so when you are in a partnership, you have a lot to offer to the person in front of you. You have every right to be demanding and picky honestly because when you connect with someone, you risk breaking and losing all that you’ve built for yourself. Be it your character, money, life, values, etc. I’m saying this because it’s been proven that it takes only a few days for humans to start getting influenced by their environment and that includes the people around them. You’re also someone who compromises in relationships so it’s important that you find someone who’s rich in character, well meaning towards you, mature, wise and wants to provide for you so you’re not at a loss.

You are accepting of people’s differences and might enjoy some level of fighting, and aggression but you have a more peaceful personality. You enjoy the making up part of fighting 😭. The energy that I’m getting here is so adorable and funny. You will only be with someone who can you respect, admire and look up to because you have a lot of self respect, and wouldn’t want to risk losing all that you’ve built for yourself and all the progress that you’ve made so supposing something happens and they’re correcting, and scolding you, you will either silently take it or try to fight back but will still end up listening to them and taking it in the end xD. You seek peace but you have an ability to find passion and beauty even in conflict, and have it strengthen your bond with your partner rather than break it. You have a lot of integrity and are incredibly honest. Supposing you did something that most people would hide or lie about, you’d just expose it because it’s just a natural part of you. If it is concerning past matters, I’m getting that you would talk about these things in a more unapologetic manner but if it is something that is happening in the present moment or could harm the connection, you would be more remorseful with your speech but you feel like someone who wants to love you should know you and someone who wants to understand you will do so. You quite literally have nothing to hide. You also understand the nuances of emotions and human relationships, if you do anything to hurt your partner. You try to make up for it and build trust back again gradually rather than getting mad at them for not forgiving or trusting you. Most of you wouldn’t really do things that would betray or hurt your partner but I’m getting certain things coming through. You have high standards and before you get with your partner, you don’t trust their intentions and are naturally secretive. You try to be cautious and strategic not to manipulate but to protect yourself, and not fall victim to manipulation and mind games, and this is not a con, it is a pro but this can also create a bit more of a distrustful dynamic between you and your partner initially. So once you trust them enough, you’re honest with them about how you felt and how you feel, and all of that. You don’t hide much if anything from your partner once you feel safe enough. In fact, you don’t mind showing them your uglier sides or talking about the worst things that you have done, you want them to know you deeply, even the ugly parts and be able to accept, and love them. You have no intention of putting your partner through anything ugly but you just want them to know how shitty of a person you have been or can be. You don’t want them to love the ugly parts of you as in, put up with them but to have faith in you as a person despite what you may have done in the past. The thing is, you seem to be a person of a lot of integrity naturally so the ugly things that you’ve done in the past were mostly reactions to what other people were doing to you? But even so, you were treated as and seen as the villain in such situations but you don’t really care to explain your side to anyone.

However, with your partner, you do. I think that it’s a subconscious thing for you actually, you might not be aware that this side of you exists until you actually get into a relationship. Also, you have dealt with a lot of fights, competitions, aggression and conflicts, and do not want to deal with these anymore. You want a more understanding and peaceful dynamic with acceptance of differences, and fights that add passion into the bond and strengthen it rather than weaken, and break it. You are tired of being misunderstood :(. You know how to be alone and don’t act desperate for connections so when you do connect with someone, it’s not out of desperation but from a place of grounded place of truly choosing someone and connecting with them. You have likely experienced money or even if you haven’t, you are not money hungry. Yes, you do want money, it’s very obvious that you’re interested in building a life full of abundance for yourself and you see it as a valuable asset that can make life more beautiful but you think that character and true connections are beyond value. Even though you’re pretty self regulated when you’re single or try to be, you rely on your partner and want them to rely on you. You let them rely on you and work as a team with them. You do not want to burden your partner initially maybe so you’ll try to keep up appearances of stability but overtime, the more comfortable that you get with them, the more that you rely on them. You’re very candid and don’t try to be elegant for no reason, you’re just real. Obviously, you will still want to self regulate sometimes but you’re so grateful to have someone to rely on and want to be the same for them. You seem to have mixed feelings about dependency in a connection but you know how to maintain a fine balance. You want a provider and are a provider yourself, and would love the finer things in life but you are fine with not having it. Even if your partner’s finances were to fall apart, you’d stick by their side because you have faith in them and you enjoy the down to earth moments of comfort just as much as you may enjoy a luxury retreat. What matters is your constant companion :,). How sweet. Also, you’re the type to tire yourself out by working for your relationship and partner, trying to be everything for them, trying to be the one that they can depend on at all times. You go above and beyond for them, and your relationship with them. This is why you need a partner who is well meaning and wants to work for the relationship too because you’re not going to care if you’re tired, hungry, whatever, you’re just going to work, work, work for them. I think that you’ve developed high standards and certain demands, and requirements that you need your partner to meet because in the past, all you did was work, work, work and for people who couldn’t or just didn’t do the same for you. You didn’t even ask for anything. You just kept on doing. You deserved so much better than that. I’m glad that you can see that now.

Moving onto your cons, once you’re invested and committed, that is it. Your devotion reaches the highest point possible and you’re so busy fulfilling, managing, and balancing the relationship that you don’t notice or take into account your own happiness or lack of it. You’re very flexible and keen on seeing, and understanding your partner’s perspective and manage your emotions well in order to fulfil your role in the relationship, and plan and prepare for the future but you’re often too patient, and understanding. You try to find balance and happiness even if the relationship is unfulfilling for you. There are times when you are so busy balancing, understanding and maintaining the relationship by doing for it that you don’t notice how you’re being deprived of your wants and needs until it hits you really hard or even if you know that it’s not bringing you happiness, you continue trying because you’re borderline addicted to the person and are willing to put your needs, and wants in the backseat. You try to be understanding instead of leaving the relationship. “Not everything is about me.” “Not everything has to be how I dreamed of it to be.” You are able to find satisfaction in situations that are not satisfactory and you deserve so much better than that. You continue maintaining an image of being happy and fulfilled on the outside even if you’re dying on the inside due to how the relationship is not doing much for you. Your connections tend to drain you and in fact, rob you off your happiness and abundance, and you let it. You go through phases in your relationships but throughout it, you try your best to be understanding and patient, and maintain and fulfil the relationship. You think of the relationship as something divine and fulfilling initially, and try your best to fulfil it as such but then you start noticing that the connection is not what you dreamed of it to be but even so, you maintain optimism and continue doing for it because you understand that people are different, and that not every dream needs to come true but the more time that passes by, the more you lose your inner sense of abundance because you start bringing addicted to the other person and the lack of satisfaction only becomes more evident. Even so, you continue doing your best, you continue maintaining the relationship and being understanding, and patient but then you start becoming sadder, and start feeling lonelier. Then, you start mourning the relationship while you’re still in it. After that, you start thinking about things more logically. You start using your reasoning skills and enter a period of analysis. By this point, you’ve felt and mourned enough, you become more mind oriented than heart oriented and seek mental clarity, and truth above everything.

Then you enter a period of dissatisfaction, boredom, contemplation and nostalgia. Until the sorrow phase, you are very understanding. Starting from the thinker phase onwards, you start becoming more and more dissatisfied. After this phase of dissatisfaction and contemplation is over, you realise that the connection was not even that solid, stable and grounded, and you finally have the courage to break it. You are someone who maintains the relationship in such a way that you handle both the feminine and masculine parts because you genuinely don’t mind doing for love which is actually a really good trait but in this case, it’s a con because you wouldn’t have to fulfil both the roles if your partner was not complacent in the first place. You also give away your dreams in order to find happiness in whatever the relationship is and whatever your partner has to offer. You are not someone who gives up simply because your partner and the relationship is not living up to your wishes, instead you try to make the most out of the relationship by doing your best and remain patient, understanding, and satisfied through it all until you absolutely cannot take it anymore. I feel like if you’ve had past relationships, situationships, whatever, they wouldn’t have lasted as long as they did if it wasn’t for you. They lasted as long as they did only because of the effort you put into them, all the roles you took on and all the understanding, and patience that you showed. There could also be a history of getting deeply involved in situations that were not even grounded in the first place i.e. the person you were involved with was not committed to you and you were not leaving these situations despite dissatisfaction, and sorrow until you absolutely couldn’t take it anymore. If it’s not a history, it could be a tendency that you’re not even aware of yet. Be careful because you will get deeply wounded by these situations due to how much you give away. You cannot and should not try anything not committed because that’s not how you’re programmed, that’s not what you’re made for. In fact, if you feel or have felt used by friends of whatever sex you’re attracted to (because many of you have or will), I suggest that you make a firm decision to not be friends with them, not on a personal level at least i.e. no texting, no calling, no sorrow sharing, etc. because due to your natural provider tendencies, you might end up giving them more than you should. ‘You’re losing me’ by Taylor Swift is coming through. I’m glad that your pros showed that you’ve become more demanding and have developed high standards because it will truly protect you from so many low quality experiences.

Pros:

i) You are highly intolerant of nonsense and uphold firm standards - both for yourself and for others.

ii) You are ruthlessly self-disciplined, holding yourself accountable to your own values and goals.

iii) You are patient and understand the importance of building a connection with consistency, effort and long-term investment.

iv) You are extremely perseverant, once you commit, you’re all in and don’t back down easily.

v) You’ve learned from the past to value reciprocity and have developed high standards after noticing imbalanced efforts in previous relationships.

vi) You are growth-oriented, constantly working on yourself and striving to meet your own evolving standards.

vii) You are naturally a provider, regardless of gender, and take on a role of dependability and support in relationships.

viii) You value stability and long-term commitment, and prefer grounded connections over fleeting ones.

ix) You have a traditional side when it comes to relationships, valuing maturity, wisdom and reliability

x) You do not entertain people who aren’t serious or grounded, you seek meaningful and stable partnerships.

xi) You consistently strive to better yourself and want a partner with the same mindset and drive.

xii) You are guided by values, ethics and principles, and desire a partner who is equally rooted in integrity.

xiii) While your standards are considered ‘high’, they are realistic and rooted in experience and self-awareness.

xiv) You seek a partner who is mature, loyal, focused on growth, and respectful - not one with wandering eyes.

xv) You cannot respect someone who lacks discipline or character, as your self-respect wouldn’t allow you to stay in that dynamic.

xvi) You have every right to be discerning in love because you risk your whole foundation i.e. your values, character and peace when entering a relationship.

xvii) You compromise in relationships but require someone whose character is rich, intentions are pure and who wants to contribute as much as you do.

xviii) You are peaceful by nature but enjoy occasional conflict if it adds passion and depth, when followed by reconciliation.

xix) You value peace but can find beauty in passionate, emotionally charged moments that strengthen your bond.

xx) You possess a deep sense of honesty and integrity. Even when you mess up, you are transparent.

xxi) You don’t hide your flaws, you reveal even your ‘ugly’ sides because you desire to be deeply known and authentically accepted.

xxii) You are unapologetically open about your past mistakes, seeing them as part of your truth, not something to be ashamed of.

xxiii) You’re remorseful when your actions hurt your partner and put effort into rebuilding trust, showing emotional maturity.

xxiv) You’re cautious and strategic at the beginning of a connection, not to manipulate but to protect yourself.

xxv) Once trust is built, you are transparent, candid and willing to reveal your deepest truths.

xxvi) You want your partner to love and understand you as a whole, even the parts of you that you’ve struggled with yourself.

xxvii) Despite being misunderstood by others, you long for a partner who will hear your side and see the full context of who you are, and will express your truth to them.

xxviii) You are tired of conflict, competition and misunderstanding, you now seek peace, understanding and calmness in love.

xxix) You are emotionally independent - you do not chase relationships from desperation but choose them from clarity and groundedness.

xxx) You have likely experienced wealth or comfort yet are not materialistic. You value character and deep connection above material things.

xxxi) While you can self-regulate, you value mutual dependency in relationships and welcome shared vulnerability.

xxxii) You don’t put on a polished act, you’re real, raw and authentic, even if that means being a little messy at times.

xxxiii) You strive to balance independence with healthy dependency. You are reliable and incredibly grateful to have someone to rely on.

xxxiv) You are willing to stick by your partner through both abundance and scarcity, valuing emotional constancy over material security.

xxxv) You work tirelessly in your relationships - providing, nurturing, supporting, always beyond what is asked of you.

xxxvi) You require a partner who can meet you in effort and intention, you’ve likely learned from exhausting one-sided relationships.

xxxvii) You’ve developed your high standards as a response to past imbalance where you gave endlessly without asking for anything in return.

xxxviii) You now recognize your worth, the value you bring, and that you deserve a partner who matches your energy and effort.

Cons:

i) Once you’re emotionally invested, your devotion becomes absolute, even to your own detriment. You over-prioritize the relationship, often neglecting your own happiness.

ii) You’re too patient and understanding, sometimes to a fault. You’ll sacrifice your own needs in favor of maintaining harmony and ‘doing the right thing.’

iii) You tend to internalize dissatisfaction, trying to make peace with unfulfilling situations by convincing yourself to be grateful for whatever little you’re receiving.

iv) You’re so focused on making the relationship work that you don’t realize how deprived you are until it crashes down on you emotionally.

v) You continue giving your all and keeping up appearances even while emotionally dying inside, carrying the entire emotional load silently.

vi) You minimize your needs and abandon your dreams to find satisfaction in whatever your partner is able or willing to offer, even if it’s not enough.

vii) Your emotional resilience becomes a double-edged sword allowing you to stay too long in connections that are unbalanced and hurtful.

viii) You shift into a caregiving role and unconsciously take on both the masculine and feminine energies in a relationship, trying to do everything yourself.

ix) You tend to become addicted to the person rather than the reality of the relationship, which clouds your judgment.

x) You mourn the relationship while still being in it, silently grieving the emotional starvation while continuing to serve and stay.

xi) You delay walking away from a connection that isn’t working, hoping your emotional labor will somehow transform the dynamic.

xii) You rationalize subpar treatment by telling yourself, “not everything is about me” or “it doesn’t have to be perfect,” slowly eroding your own boundaries.

xiii) You try to remain optimistic and patient even as the joy and emotional richness of the connection disappears.

xiv) You experience phases in relationships: deep emotional commitment → subtle dissatisfaction → silent sorrow → mental detachment → heavy dissatisfaction → eventual clarity and breakup.

xv) Once you hit emotional burnout, you switch from heart-led to logic-driven, seeking mental clarity and analyzing everything in retrospect.

xvi) Your pattern often leads to eventual heartbreak not because you were blind but because you delayed acting on what you already knew inside.

xvii) The relationship sometimes only lasts as long as it does because of your effort, sacrifice and emotional labor, not because of equal contribution from the other side.

xviii) You may have a pattern or history of being deeply invested in connections that were never fully committed or grounded to begin with.

xix) You could be prone to entering or staying in ambiguous dynamics (e.g. situationships) even though they do not align with your true needs for security and commitment.

xx) Your natural provider energy makes you give more than you should, even to friends or casual connections, leaving you feeling used or emotionally drained.

xxi) You are deeply wounded by experiences where you gave your all and received inconsistency or emotional neglect in return.

xxii) You are not built for emotionally casual or undefined relationships and trying to engage in them could be damaging to your well-being.

xxiii) You might unknowingly attract people who take advantage of your loyalty, patience and giving nature, especially if they sense your emotional endurance.

xxiv) Even though you have now developed higher standards, there’s still a lingering vulnerability to fall into old emotional patterns if not constantly self-aware.

xxv) If your history includes being used by emotionally intimate friendships with those you’re attracted to, it may be necessary to establish stricter emotional boundaries.

xxvi) You have a tendency to perform emotional labor for others, taking on their pain, worries, and chaos, even when it harms your peace.

xxvii) You’re often too understanding of poor treatment, interpreting it as ‘human flaw’ rather than a red flag which slows your exit from unhealthy dynamics.

⊹ ! ೀ Pile 3 ꒱

Starting with your pros, you are someone who seeks to learn and teach in a romantic relationship. In fact, you’re always learning from everywhere and so, you want to be with someone who you can look up to and learn from, and who looks up to you and learns from you as well. You’re very happy go lucky in many ways and have different sides to you. You’ve likely experienced the ups and downs of life but most people see you as having experienced only the ups because you can act very happy, and bubbly. You’re also someone who can accept both the positives and negatives that come your way, and will stick with your partner through the ups and downs of life. You won’t let life come in between you and your partner, instead you’ll go with the flow of things and try to turn life around with them. You see love as a commitment, you value certain traditions and old school ideas, and naturally live by them and aspire to live by them, and do not let your commitment waver. Also, whether people know it or not, you bring a lot of luck into your romantic partner’s life. It doesn’t have to be that good things start happening to them after you enter their life (though it very well could be) but instead that simply just having a partner like you itself is very fortunate. You understand love and commitment very deeply, and love in a divine manner. You’re traditional and old school in many ways, and it makes you very dutiful and responsible. You do not leave your partner when they’re going through an emotional low or a low point in their life instead you remain patient, understanding and try to see things from their perspective. You instead try to maintain the connection and work with your partner in harmony, and cooperation by understanding their emotions and taking on their usual role if you have to. You’re flexible and don’t mind changing when life calls for it. People don’t give women enough credit. When people think about a traditional relationship, they immediately think about a working husband and a stay at home wife but they forget that life is not that simple for everyone. Even the most traditional couples from our parent’s generation and before that, the women have worked to provide for their family if they had to.

That didn’t make their relationship any less traditional. It’s similar with you, you value old school and traditional relationships but your idea of a traditional relationship is a lot about ethics, values, and responsibilities rather than the typical traditional roles alone. You do not mind stepping up for a while if the relationship calls for it but you are definitely not willing to provide for a bum for the rest of your life. You still expect your partner to want to be a provider and if they stop trying, you’d frankly lose a lot of respect for them. You don’t mind changing and transforming deeply through your partner, relationship or for them but you’re also okay with endings. You’re not someone who keeps on holding onto a connection just because the start of the relationship was beautiful. You’ve learned healthy self regulation by now and have changed a lot, in fact, you’re always learning, and always in the process of change and also like I said earlier, you’ve experienced the ups and downs of life which includes losing connections, and people and all of it has caused you to be more comfortable with endings. You don’t care about how much potential any connection has, if you feel slightly disrespected or realise that it’s not what you want, that you’d be disrespecting yourself by staying in the connection, you will leave. You’re a very ethical person who truly tries to watch your character and empathise, understand, and work with your partner so if you don’t receive the same, you’ll leave. For you, losing respect and feeling disrespected is enough of a reason to leave because you value integrity. Character is a big thing for you and I’m so glad that you seem to have more of a self assured approach to connections, and know what you want and can offer. You’re also okay with not exploring the potential of connections at all and not taking them to the next level if it requires you to lose integrity, turn a blind eye to disrespect, turn a blind eye to lack of values of the other person, etc. You know how to experience relationships in a divine manner in which you become one with your partner and work as a team with patience, understanding, and love but when relationships end, you are able to see and accept that it was clearly not as grounded, stable and deep as you may have wanted it to be.

Moving onto your cons, there’s a big emphasis on your past for those of you who have it. Your past experiences could cause you to have a more negative view of love and I mean, overwhelmingly negative. A fear of history repeating itself, a belief that whatever happened in the past will happen again, I’m getting sleepless nights or nightmares kind of stuff but that’s not the case for most of you and even if it is, you are able to move past it. The real problem is your partner’s past. You want a divine and devoted love in which you pretty much become one with your partner, and you hold commitment and love to a very high standard as well as caliber. You would not get with just anyone and even if some of you have in the past, those experiences were not real, they weren’t grounded and you accept, and understand that so they hold no meaning to you but for your partner, it could, you fear that. You want to be the only one for them. It would not be a con but you’re someone who will legit break down to tears, lose sleep or wake up deeply sad at the thought of your partner having been with and loved someone else :,). I’m the same so no judgement. You’re also very naive and pure, you love in a young, and innocent manner and fear not receiving love in the same way. When you love someone, they’re the only one for you and you fear that that’s not the case for them. The mere thought of them having memories of someone else, being able to remember their touch, voice, intimate moments with them, romantic moments with them, the feeling of being with them, all and any of it is enough to break you down into tears, make you overthink and lose sleep. This is interesting, you have always been a risk taker in relationships, often ending up rushing into them and your innocent nature caused you to be taken advantage of. You were honestly very naive and still are but now you’re aware of it, and you fear having to experience such moments again. It doesn’t even have to have happened regarding romance but your past seems to have made you feel naive causing you to be afraid of taking risks now.

You’re incredibly childlike and naive, having faith and believing in your partner without questioning things much if at all 🥹. It’s funny because you could give them hell about their past and drive yourself insane by thoughts of it but you love them so purely, and have so much faith in them. You lack assertiveness and become very soft, too soft. You’re sensitive and are ever loving. You become too empathetic and too caring. You’re extremely sensitive and vulnerable as well though, and despite lacking assertiveness, you tend to be very sharp and reckless when hurt. You possess a duality in which you can be out of control sometimes but are mostly not this way, in fact, you’re more subservient and meek, not expressing much assertiveness most of the time. You are instead very soft and sensitive, and loving and understanding. You experience the relationship as something very deep. It causes you to change a lot internally and question your beliefs, and change them and despite your comfortability with change, it is very intense and extreme so you try not to show the effects of it externally. However, this intensity, extremity, transformation and resistance has its way of showing up externally so you end up showing very vulnerable sides of yourself in the process of trying not to do so? Also, a very romantic thing is coming through, you try to avoid falling or showing that you’ve fallen and in the process of doing so, you fail even harder or when you realise, or show that you’ve fallen, there’s just no way of getting over it. It’s just so profound and deep. What’s that Mariah Carrey song that’s been trending recently? The one that goes “I give my all to him, just one more night with you. That song is coming through and also ‘hopelessly devoted to you’. You get deeply involved with your romantic partner and will have a hard time moving on from them due to how sensitive, soft and vulnerable they made you feel. You love deeply even if you are emotionally well regulated on the outside and can have a very hard time moving on. Being haunted by your past romantic partner for a really long time. Those of you who have loved someone this deeply are likely aware of this side of yourself.

Pros:

i) You approach love as a mutual journey of growth, you want to both learn from and teach your partner, creating a dynamic of shared wisdom.

ii) You are genuinely happy-go-lucky with a lighthearted spirit that coexists with emotional depth. You’ve experienced real lows but carry yourself with joy and resilience.

iii) You’re emotionally adaptable, able to accept both the highs and lows of life without letting them disrupt your connection with your partner.

iv) You’re committed and grounded in your view of love. For you, love is not a fleeting feeling but a deep-rooted responsibility and choice.

v) You believe in traditional values but not in a rigid or outdated way. Your version of tradition is based on ethics, responsibility and mutual respect, not gender roles.

vi) You bring genuine emotional abundance into your partner’s life. Simply being with you is a source of good fortune, stability and growth for them.

vii) You love in a divine, spiritual way- your love is loyal, enduring and deeply respectful of the sacredness of commitment.

viii) You do not abandon your partner in their low moments. Instead, you become more understanding, empathetic and willing to help carry the emotional weight if needed.

ix) You’re emotionally flexible and can adapt to life’s changing circumstances, taking on more or less in the relationship depending on what’s needed.

x) You honor and admire traditional structures, but you don’t cling to outdated norms. Your version of tradition is modern, realistic, and rooted in character and values.

xi) You don’t shy away from responsibility when love calls for it but you have clear boundaries. You’re not willing to support someone endlessly if they’re not putting in effort.

xii) You expect your partner to have the drive to provide and contribute. If they stop trying altogether, you lose respect which is a clear dealbreaker for you.

xiii) You’re capable of deep transformation through love and relationship, and open to evolving alongside your partner, while still maintaining your sense of self.

xiv) You have developed strong emotional maturity and self-regulation, which allows you to navigate endings with grace and clarity when needed.

xv) You no longer chase potential. If a connection disrespects your values or self-worth in any way, you are confident enough to walk away, no matter how beautiful it once was.

xvi) You are grounded in integrity and character. You offer understanding, empathy and accountability, and expect the same in return.

xvii) You do not tolerate disrespect, even in subtle forms. Respect is a non-negotiable for you and you trust yourself to walk away when it’s compromised.

xviii) You are not interested in ‘fixing’ or ‘seeing potential’ in people, you know what you want and you don’t waste energy on connections that can’t meet you there.

xix) You’ve accepted the impermanence of relationships. You’ve known loss, and it has made you wiser, stronger and more discerning with your energy.

xx) You seek a divine, team-oriented connection - one where both people contribute with patience, understanding and love. You strive for harmony, not hierarchy.

xxi) When something ends, you are able to reflect with honesty and accept that the connection wasn’t as deep, stable or reciprocal as you hoped, and you let it go.

Cons:

i) Your past romantic experiences, especially if painful or unfulfilling, still linger in your emotional body and may cause you to approach love with an underlying fear of history repeating itself.

ii) You have a deeply idealistic and divine view of love, so any reminder of your partner’s romantic or intimate past can deeply distress you, even to the point of sleepless nights, sadness or emotional spiraling.

iii) You want to be your partner’s one and only, not just in the present but in emotional and spiritual history. The thought that you may not be, even if irrational, can cause you overwhelming sadness and insecurity.

iv) You love in a deeply innocent, childlike and devoted way. You fear not receiving love in that same pure and all-encompassing form from your partner.

v) The mere idea of your partner remembering someone else’s voice, touch or presence can break you down because you love with your whole being.

vi) You’ve always been a risk-taker, rushing into things with open arms but this innocent approach has left you vulnerable to manipulation or being taken advantage of.

vii) Your past has made you question your judgment. Now, even though you crave deep love, you’re afraid of taking emotional risks and getting hurt again.

viii) You still carry a very innocent and trusting heart. You often believe in your partner fully, without questioning much.

ix) You lack assertiveness in romantic relationships, becoming soft, overly gentle and self-sacrificing. You tend to put your partner’s emotional needs above your own, often to a fault.

x) You’re extremely sensitive and deeply empathetic. While this is beautiful, it often leads to emotional overwhelm and an inability to set healthy emotional boundaries.

xi) Despite your gentle nature, when you’re hurt, you can become sharp, reactive and even reckless. You swing between emotional softness and sudden, unexpected intensity.

xii) This emotional duality - being mostly meek and self-sacrificing but occasionally eruptive when deeply wounded creates inner turmoil, and can confuse both you and your partner.

xiii) You go through deep internal transformations in relationships, questioning and shifting your core beliefs but you try to suppress or hide the external signs of this emotional upheaval.

xiv) Even though you try to appear strong or unaffected, the emotional weight of your romantic transformation leaks out, making you appear vulnerable, exposed or even fragile.

xv) You try not to show when you’ve fallen in love, but the more you resist, the deeper you fall. When you do fall, it’s intense, absolute and all-consuming.

xvi) Once you’ve fallen for someone, there is no easy way out for you. The love is profound, spiritually binding and not something you can detach from easily or quickly.

xvii) You are the type to give everything in love - your time, energy, emotional presence and when that love ends, it can haunt you for years.

xviii) You can carry emotional imprints of past relationships long after they’re over.

xix) You have a hard time letting go because of how deeply the relationship affected your emotional and spiritual identity. You mourn lost love in slow, aching ways.

xx) Your emotional vulnerability is a double-edged sword, it allows you to love deeply and purely, but it also leaves you feeling devastated and fragmented when that love is not returned in kind.

xxi) Despite appearing emotionally composed or even mature on the outside, your inner world is tender, volatile and very much affected by love, even long after the relationship is over.

[curvfie]

I wonder how would the beasts or ancients react to darling have a deep soft spot for kids. I mean, they do still care about other cookies but baby fever hits differently.

I would imagine darling spoil all the child cookies there like feeding acorn for pancake cookie, giving gumball cookie a whole ass art supplies, etc etc.

Beasts/ancients : the kids, or us?

Darling : my children (aka gingerbrave and his friends)

Beasts/ancients : *watches darling leaves while carrying them* man, they didn't even think about us.

Who would you think would have beef with them or would be understanding?

I’m definitely going to hell I read “darling” as “dild0” 😭🙏

TW: Death, Trap Baby, S/A..?

part 1

The beasts [I’ll do ancient later]

Mystic Flour Cookie

Mystic Flour Cookie consider such affection towards a child meaningless..

To her it’s nothing more then just another distraction towards the path to the apathy that she wants YOU to also seek.

she would often give you the gaze that says ‘I’m not mad.. I’m just disappointed.’ Whenever she sees you engage with other children’s including Cloud HaeTae Cookie.

Even if Cloud HaeTae Cookie assure you that it is just her behaviour now.. you can’t help but to feel distance, she really did change huh?

Burning Spice Cookie

He despises children’s.. he consider them weak pathetic and waste of dough..

Although he did enjoy crushing those numbskulls back in the days when he wasn’t sealed and he wasn’t scared to do it again considering how bored he feels..

If it entertains him he might also slaughter them right in front of you, he always consider your such affection as a waste of your own time.

But then again if you really do have soft spot for these weaklings.. why not make one with him? He sureeee.. can give a strong breed.. beside you wouldn’t mind it now would you..?

Shadow Milk Cookie

he LOVES and HATES children’s.. he feel like vibing with them at the same time he consider them annoying..

But once he learn about your soft spot for those little monsters.. he will definitely brag about it, heck even suggesting that you and him should have one that will bring beautiful deceit into this world!

Why of course you rejecting his advances as usual.. but hey he’ll do anything to get your attention/affection [he definitely didn’t steal a kid from orphanage..]

Eternal Sugar Cookie

oh boy.. once she learns about your cute little sweet soft spot.. she’ll definitely DEFINITELY tease you about it, she loves seeing you flustered after all

Whenever you’re passing by she’ll definitely try to cover up the fact she makes her angel’s do her chores why? Cuz the angel’s almost are identical to literal children’s which is why she doesn’t wanna upset you or.. make you think she’s enslaving them..

She’ll often discuss about the future or maybe how’ll your and her’s baby look if you two had one.. of course she’s tryna get you flustered but.. she mean her words..[Take care of your little pp chat 👋 /Jk]

Silent Salt Cookie

they.. have no opinion.. over children’s.

If you likes children’s or have soft spot for them, they’re okay with it as long as they aren’t bothered about it themself.

Despite the silence the only thing I think they can do is to tolerating the children’s little cry, they hate that only thing.. but regardless they don’t really care.. so you’re cool.

[777heavengirl]

kitchen

remus lupin x reader one-shot ! warnings: my beta reader rated it 12/10 angst, do with that what you will. word count: 2,889 masterlist a/n: this is so sad. this is rlly just me partly reflecting my break up onto Remus i AM SO SORRY IN ADVANCE.

You stared at the side of Remus’s face as he talked with James. Your brother ever the animated man, waved his arms around and spoke excitedly, to which Remus could only muster small chuckles and low-toned responses. 

You knew he was tired. 

Work was tiring. 

The moon was tiring. 

His body was tired. 

Part of you was still left with a bitter aftertaste from his apathy. You pressed a kiss against his bicep.

Remus’s lips pressed into a thin line resembling a smile. You knew it meant he was itching to leave. But you didn’t move. You sat, and stared, at him, at James, at Lily. At nothing at all. You laughed when they did, and put your hand on his forearm as to remind yourself of the spark between you. To remind yourself that he was here, with you and that he loved you.

That you loved him too.

You wondered if he had always been this way. Had you just been too in love to notice the apathy? The way he seemed to not even try to reciprocate any energy? Were you just being too needy? 

Was James not bothered by his friend’s lack of emotion? 

You and Remus had too much history. You could not remember what life was like without being with him. It had been years. Years of running up and down behind your twin brother and his friends, years of hands intertwined with Remus’s, kisses first shared in the dark— Merlin forbid your brother found out at the time. You had been happy. For years. Even with the ups and downs and the mercurial nature of his moods. Maybe lunar is a better word for it.

The waning and waxing phases of the way he felt about the world. You thought that might be the hardest part of it all. 

The way he’d be enthusiastic about the future one week, talking about job postings that had piqued his interest, talking about a future. But other weeks, the dark side of the moon reared its ugly head. He’d be riddled with doubts and fears. Days and weeks were he simply wallowed, days where he haunted your room or your kitchen, for hours. He’d reluctantly go to his muggle job, the monotony of it all bringing his mood down even more.

Weeks like those it was hard. The talks of aspirations went up in a cloud of smoke and you were once again left with nothing.

 He always did say that even though he wasn't sure what he wanted to do, he was sure about you. That you were the one constant in his future. No matter what, it was you. It wasn’t as reassuring as he believed it to be.

You tried not to think about it.

You eventually bid goodbye to your brother and his darling wife. The picture of a perfect family, with a baby on the way, in a small flowering cottage. You itched to ask Remus if he ever wanted that. Did he ever think about it at all?

But, you loved him. That was all that mattered.

Besides, you had real history. Too many years invested. If it wasn’t with him, you were probably just going to end up alone.

You were in love with him for Godric’s sake. Maybe that was the reason you could never choose yourself. 

“Have you given what we talked about some thought?” your words were barely above a whisper, unsure, scared about what his answer could be. You could see him look around uncomfortably. Maybe you should’ve waited until you actually got home not walking through the streets. 

“Y-yeah, I did…” his hand gripped yours tighter as you walked, like you might slip from his fingers “I think I should maybe wait a few weeks…” his shoulders tensed when the sigh inevitably left your lips. “I’m sorry I know it isn't what you wanted to hear but- I don't know if the Ministry would even take me… I did see a new posting for an entry-level in the department of magical creatures maybe I could apply”

“Apply soon yeah”

He nodded silently and you kissed his shoulder to wordlessly tell him thank you, as you walked home from James and Lily’s. Maybe he’d actually do it this time. Maybe one day, he’d see his own potential, he’d see how much farther he could go. 

Maybe someday he’d be brave enough to take a leap and fulfill his promises to you and himself. Maybe one day you’d finally be in a spot to build a family together. Or at least plan for it.

After all, you and Remus had real history. And he promised. Many moons ago.

Your love for him was why it was always so hard to do the right thing. 

Because as soon there was some disagreement, you knew, as much as he did, that no matter how upset you might be with him he could sweep you into his arms and all worry would melt away. 

In the small flat, you and Remus shared, under the warm light of the stray table lamp you’d dance. He’d take you in his arms and move along the soft rhythm of the music he’d put on. He’d kiss your temple and swear and promise.

Shallow words that at this point went in one ear and out the other. Promises of a future together, of applications that would never get done, of steps that would never even be attempted. 

But nevertheless, you forgave. 

You forgave four years of broken promises. You forgave the lack of a ring on your finger. You forgave the lack of planning for the future. You forgave his indifference.

You made yourself think you forgave him.

You tried to forget too.

Tried to forget his lack of ambition because why try when they would never want to hire someone like me? Tried to forget the way your mother had warned you about this a year back. Tried to forget the way Sirius called your phone last month from France, telling you you’d love it there, telling you it was a shame Remus didn’t want to go. How much of a shame it was that you had to miss out on life-changing experiences because Remus couldn't. 

Wouldn’t. 

Same thing.

Sirius called again a few days after you visited your brother.

“Is it raining there? The weather’s shit here at the moment” You ask, staring at the window, the raging storm outside banging against the glass and drowning the usual sight of the street bellow. 

“Meh- could be worse, I reckon it’s starting to warm up soon, so m’pretty excited about that,” He said, you hummed in acknowledgment “Have you talked to Moony again about coming? It really is beautiful in the summer doll— besides you can stay with me for free obviously”

You sighed

“No Sirius, I honestly don't even want to ask I already know how that one will go”

“So what? you’re not vacationing at all?”

“The only place I’m vacationing is in rock bottom Black-” you said, staring at the closed bedroom door. No doubt Remus was taking a small nap. The full moon was approaching.

Sirius tskd’d.

“You know you can always come… by yourself I mean, stay with me for a while”

“Sirius…”

“I know I know… I’m sorry-” Sirius tried laughing it off, the chuckle not lasting long as he asked, “Are you happy at least? With him.”

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to say to that” You tried fighting the way your eyes seemed to immediately water.

“I fear it’s a pretty straight-up question- yes or no?”

“I don’t know if this is what happy is anymore” you whispered, afraid to state it fully aloud

“Then it isn't. When you’re happy, you know” Sirius sounded somber “You have to do the right thing, whatever is right for you not for him”

“It is never that easy”

“Yes, it is doll. It is always that easy”

You bid him goodbye soon after.

You chalked it off as Sirius not knowing what it was like to be with someone for years. You couldn’t just throw away the past four years of your life just because what? He was tired? He wasn’t putting as much effort as you wanted?

It could be fixed.

You were convinced you’d fix it as Remus trudged out of the room, hair disheveled as he rested his head on your shoulder. A kiss to the crook of your neck.

“Was it Pads?” he mumbled against your skin, you ignored the way you felt caught

“Yes”

“Is he okay?”

“Yes, better than okay”

“I wish we could go to Paris” you tried not breaking down in tears right there and there. 

It was never about money. You could go on brooms for fucks sake. You could portkey right into Sirius’s little French apartment. 

You didn't ask him why not. Why not go? You drowned the question in the tea he eventually handed you. You had always been more of a coffee person, but much like everything else, you sacrificed it for his preference for tea and its calming effects.

You tried your best to fix it, for months. You’d lay down with him after work, card your fingers through his light brown locks, trace his scars while he fought off sleep, press a chaste kiss to his lips before he fell asleep. 

You started calling Sirius more often than not, in hushed whispers. Tears were often spilled. You stopped feeling bad eventually. It was just calling a friend in a time of need. Draining the disappointment you didn't dare throw in Remus’s face. 

He was going through enough.

You continued to hold on to hope.

You’d nudge him along. Try for new jobs, call friends to see if anyone, anyone at all, could find him an in with the ministry.

“He just needs to apply sweetie- this is stupid” Marlene rolled her eyes, her auror uniform casually unbuttoned after her day of work, she twirled the spoon in her tea with a small wave of her finger. “They’re starting these werewolf allocation programs, they make sure they’re given jobs and such…”

“I don't know if he’d like that” You groaned, dropping your face into your hands. You could imagine him already, turning his nose away from any sort of Ministry help.

“Can I ask why he isn’t the one asking me these things?” Marlene said a glint in her eye that let you know she knew the answer already. You looked away.

“Sometimes it's hard to do the right thing Marls”

“You need to do the right thing for yourself”

“Marlene-” you scoffed “Me and Remus just have too much history- how can I ever just choose me? It’s us”

“Maybe it’s time it’s just you” 

You stared at Remus that night, the soft music that played from his muggle radio filling the air between you. You stared at him silently, the curve of his lips, the soft of the apples of his cheeks. The silvery scars that ran across his face. 

You loved him, you did.

But you also did feel the very worst you could feel. No dancing in the kitchen could fix it anymore. No kisses and fake promises could fix it. Not anymore.

As soft as he made you feel, as much history as you had together. You couldn't help the overwhelming need to cry every time you looked at him. 

What the hell was he even doing? What were you doing?

Any plans you had dreamed of with him were now very quickly crumbling in front of your eyes. He continued to silently make tea. You hoped he wouldn't notice the stray tears that managed to escape your eyes.

You and Remus had what your brother always called real history. He just meant it was deeply engrained, in your bones, in your heart. He said it poignantly last time you popped in for a visit. His tone didn’t fail to chip at your heart.

Your years together weren’t something you could erase. Not that you wanted to. 

You were happy with him. Right? You loved him.

Maybe if you just gave him more time. You had graduated Hogwarts a mere two years ago. 

He had always been more than good to you. Even at your lowest. Even at his lowest. He was nothing but gentle and loving.

Maybe. Sometimes, love wasn't enough.

You didn’t say anything as he finished cleaning up the kitchen. He kissed your temple goodnight. You stayed up, staring at the phone line debating on calling Sirius, again. 

“I just don’t know what I should do…” you leaned against the wet metal railing of your balcony, the drops seeping into your pajama pants. You grabbed the base of the phone with one hand, the other holding the receiver up to your ear

“I don’t know why you’re asking me angel, you already know what my answer is going to be”

“Don’t be mean Sirius” he could hear the pout in your voice, and he laughed

“I’m not- you know I love Moony, we’ve been friends for ages but…”

“But?”

“I love you more” You didn’t respond. “And I think you need to love yourself more than you love him too” You could hear him inhale what you guessed was a cigarette

You hummed in acknowledgment, not daring to open your mouth at the fear that sobs would break your words.

“Don’t wear yourself out for someone that isn’t doing the same for you…”

“That’s unfair… he does”

“He forgot a card for your anniversary”

“It was a few days after the full moon…”

“Okay, what about your birthday? Or Christmas for that matter? What? D’you think I’d forget how you called crying? Every single one of those times” He said, you could feel your lip wobbling. “Come to Paris with me-”

“Sirius-”

“Just think about it okay? Promise me you’ll at least do that…”

“Okay, I will—”

“Right… ‘night love,” he said, you muttered a small goodnight “and for the record…” He hesitated for a second, almost as if he shouldn’t say it. Sirius was never one to stay quiet, he did this time. “Nevermind, I love you”

“Love you too Sirius” you answered, head hanging in defeat. The phone call clicked off.

It really wasn’t about Sirius you thought, as you guiltily crawled into bed with your boyfriend. Not about France either. You stared at his sleeping form.

It wasn’t about your and Remus’s history. It didn’t matter how long you had been together if there was no future.

It wasn’t about what your brother or Marlene, or even your mother thought. 

It was about choosing you. 

Right?

“Remus” you padded over and stood next to the small dining table that morning. 

“Yes?” He didn’t look up from his book, a bad habit he had picked up. He was never truly listening when he did that

“Remus have you applied to the job at the Ministry?”

“Mhm? Ministry…” he still didn’t look up, he took a sip of his tea “No I haven't yet, I’ll get around to it though, I just want to take my time with it you know?”

“Its an application how long can it take?” you could feel yourself start getting angry, and you looked away from him. Not that he had looked up to look you in the eyes anyway.

“I just want to give myself the best chance to get in.” he finally looked up from his book, an exasperated look on his face. You refused to meet his eyes “What's wrong with that?”

“You’ve been saying the same thing for ages Remus”

“We’ll I have other things going on— just because you have different ideas about what my progress should look like doesn't mean I’m not doing anything you know? Because I do, I do a lot actually” He said, staring at you as if daring you to deny that he did anything. 

Of course, he worked hard. You could never refute tthat. He moved his eyes down to his book.

You bit your tongue for a second, but the words slipped out nevertheless.

“Remus I don't think we can be together anymore”

“What?” the tone in his voice was nothing short of heartbroken. He searched your face for anything. Any hint that you weren't serious. “No”

Godric it was so hard to do the right thing.

“I don’t think we are on the same page anymore, you say things, you promise but…” you rubbed your temple, you could feel a headache coming “None of those promises ever come true” you sighed, finally looking at him

His eyes were rimmed red.

“You’re right,” he said, defeated, breathless.

“If you know I’m right why didn’t you just do it? I have never asked you for anything else, just for you to apply for yourself Remus, because you had said it was what you wanted”

You and Remus stared at each other. A blank look on his face as he looked at you, his nose red and tears threatening to streak down his cheeks. 

“Can you say something? Anything? Why didn’t you just do it?”

“I don’t know”

“You never know Remus, but I do and I refuse to wait for you to figure it out anymore”

permanent tag ; @laufeysvalentine @heyyyloverr

let me know if you want to be added onto the permanent tag list ! also please check out my new series bless the telephone if you haven't already! MWAH thank you for reading <3

[cuppajj]

(OLD) Beast Ancients AU FAQ

I’ve seen a lot of asks in my inbox that are identical to each other, so I decided to put em all in one post and then some. This’ll be updated the more I develop the AU and the more info we get.

As a disclaimer, I am very new to CRK (as of December 2023) and I haven’t gotten to all the game or story modes yet (notably odyssey), so things are definitely bound to change + be elaborated on more! Anyway without further ado:

General

What are the Beast Ancients’ themes?

Vanilla is Penance, Lily is Sovereignty, Dragonberry is Pride, Cacao is Solitude, and Cheese is Conquest. I tried to keep them within the realm of their original meanings

Essentially my philosophy is: Penance is the acknowledgment (truth) that sins such as deceit exist in the world and must be cleansed. Sovereignty is an extreme form of freedom where one can have all the agency they wish, but can be just as silent about their presence/power as well. Pride is a byproduct of passion or sloth, boiling down to the adamancy of the subject. Solitude is a choice made with both resolution and apathy in various degrees, and lastly Conquest promises an abundant future at the cost of untold destruction.

If the ancients are bad, are the beasts good?

No, the old Beasts are still a threat. With a total of ten beasts to worry about, the situation on Earthbread is very dire. However, there is still hope left, and hope can go a long way.

Is there a new set of ancient heroes with soul jams?

No, and there likely won’t be. The Neo Beasts and first Beasts still have their respective soul jam halves, and both want each other’s.

Where’s Gingerbrave and his party?

Likely the Crème Republic, which becomes a refuge for many cookies after the rise of the neo beasts. They’re at the front of the resistance movement, working with Clotted Cream Cookie to plan how the beasts will be taken down.

What do the Neo Beasts think of their past selves?

Generally they see themselves as improved or improving. The only one who doesn’t feel that way is Frigid Cacao, who doesn’t reflect on himself that often.

Did they all corrupt at the same time?

Still working on that part. The timeline for beast ancients is a WIP, but for now, it’s likely that while they didn’t corrupt at once, they corrupted pretty close to one another. Cheese was likely first, followed by Lily. Vanilla was among the last to fall and evidently had it the worst.

Do the Neo Beasts still have kingdoms? How is life like there?

Answered here

What are the cookies of darkness doing?

As of writing (5/31/24) we don’t have a lot of info on the cookies of darkness in beast yeast, but at the very least I can say Dark Enchantress cookie may or may not know about Midnight Lily’s plan to destroy her.

How would legendaries react?

I admittedly don’t know everything about the legendaries to say yet, but they’re all alarmed to some degree. I can flesh them out the more I learn about them

Individual Neo Beast questions under cut!

Saint Vanilla Cookie

How do his powers work?

Answered here

Does he know he’s killing cookies?

Nope, he doesn’t see it as that and it would pain him to. He sees purification as a form of transition or ascension in itself, to put it simply; he might even envy those he turns to stardust, knowing his own tainted soul will be so much harder to liberate.

Why is he constantly crying?

He’s just like that. He’s just that big of an empath.

Has his relationship with Lily changed?

Saint Vanilla still cares very much about Lily, and may even be more open about his feelings towards her; but he admits the only reason why she’s still alive is because she convinced him to leave her for last. Lily very well knows that Vanilla, in his mind, wants to purify her more than anyone else. Vanilla often pities her choice to stew in her tainted soul, but he respects her decision… at least the alternative is that they’ll someday be the only two cookies on Earthbread.

What happened to Black Raisin?

As the very first to witness his rise, she inadvertently became his very first martyr.

Where’s Custard Cookie III?

With his relatives in the Crème Republic, alongside the rest of Gingerbrave’s party. The kid has a hard time wrapping his head around what happened to Pure Vanilla, and it may be a blessing that he’s been largely focused on worrying about the well being of his uncle, Clotted Cream Cookie. As the head of the resistance, he’s been working tirelessly… is this what a king goes through too?

Shadow Milk’s opinion on Saint?

To put it simply, he starts out thinking that a confused Vanilla will be easy to manipulate, but he soon finds out that Saint Vanilla is way smarter and more aware than made out to be. He knows Shadow Milk is with him, and he wants to purge him from his soul; but that is a process that may be harder than anything else. So in the meantime, Shadow Milk can watch as he continues on his path of Penance towards ascension, fighting back the resistance he creates before it can truly harm him. Essentially, Saint Vanilla isn’t trapped with Shadow Milk, Shadow Milk is trapped with Saint Vanilla.

Dragonberry Cookie

Is the skull on her head real?

Yes! It comes from a nondescript monster.

If Pitaya is imprisoned, where is Snapdragon?

With Tarte Tatin and/or Royal Margarine. Dragon City likely got taken over by Dragonberry’s kingdom, but they noped out of there as it happened. The two of them might’ve been the first few to recognize Hollyberry’s spiral into corruption and where it was headed

How is her family doing?

Alright for the most part, but they can feel Dragonberry’s influence in every aspect of their life now. While Royal and Jungleberry are technically still the king and queen, it’s only a figurehead role as Dragonberry is the true ruler. She still cares about her family very much, but she’s controlling and good at keeping them under her thumb. Dragonberry’s granddaughter Princess Cookie is the only one who objects this new way of life, and runs away from the palace.

How would the other dragons react?

The other dragons aren’t canon to CRK so they’re not canon to the au by extension, but just for this question, they’d be different levels of alarmed or concerned save for maybe Longan. I could see Ananas wanting a word with Dragonberry in particular esp since they’re both prideful cookies

Frigid Cacao Cookie

Does he ever go outside?

Very rarely, but it’s usually to observe the licorice sea or meet with the few denizens he has left.

Where is Dark Choco?

Still working on this part (waiting for Apathy pt 2 to come out so I have a better idea), but he’s likely alone by himself. He heard wind of his father’s corruption though and took it less well than he thought he would. Perhaps he’ll run into someone who feels the same?

Is his permafrost truly permanent or can the frozen citizens be thawed?

Technically yes, the permafrost can be thawed, but it’s a meticulous process since Cacao’s ice isn’t normal ice. It’s a cure that Crunchy Chip is looking for to save Caramel Arrow.

How does the licorice sea work for him and how did he come to tame it?

I can’t say how yet outside of the fact that it was a definitely cool and heroic thing for Dark Cacao to do, on the scale of taming the Black and White dragons. The sea, arguably a sentient monster in itself, and all of the creatures within it came to follow Cacao and Cacao only. Now it almost acts like an extension of himself: the beast can make the sea do whatever he wants, like acting as his shield, arms, or barrier, and the licorice horrors will vehemently defend him. There are tons of monsters roaming his frozen kingdom now.

Mystic Flour’s opinion on Cacao?

Working on it, but to some degree she knows Cacao is much stronger than he looks. She might see his apparent apathy for his frozen kingdom with fondness though.

Celestial Cheese Cookie

Is the Golden City still running or did she leave it to die?

It may still be running but in a scaled-down beta form. Cheese learned to accept the fact that what she’d built was entirely fake, but she didn’t move on from regaining what was lost. Her virtual Golden City serves as a blueprint for the kingdom she wants on Earthbread, and then some; with nothing in the barren desert to grow her kingdom, her brightened eyes turn elsewhere towards civilizations that could be brought into the fold. Such is the beginning of the Beast of Conquest’s terror.

She does sometimes visit her golden city, only sometimes. It doesn’t look the same; it’s not a paradise for her to escape to, but it is a promise of what she will have someday. This time, it will be no mirage, and there will be no one to threaten its destruction ever again.

Midnight Lily Cookie

What is her opinion on dark enchantress cookie?

DE is the source of insecurity for Lily, who regards herself as the weakest among all the beasts. Because she’s half of a complete whole, who was already half of another whole, she is passionate about reuniting her souls. While she is focused on expanding the influence of the faerie kingdom, her true goal is to track down Dark Enchantress Cookie and destroy her; but she knows she will need more help than just herself, and has considered asking for help from other vengeful allies.

Does she still guard the silver tree?

Yes, she still fiercely honors Elder Faerie’s wishes.

Have her relationships with the other neo beasts changed?

Ish, most notably her and Celestial Cheese are a little more on speaking terms; but they’re connecting through their potential partnership as Lily hopes she can help her take down Dark Enchantress. In return, she might help her expand her kingdom and take down Burning Spice.

If more FAQs come up, I will make a part two. Thank you for your interest!

[astrosamara]

Astrology Observations #6

Happy Halloween! 🎃🎃🎃

🧡 Sun square Saturn people feel like they need to work twice as hard to achieve success that appears to come more naturally for others. Incredibly hard on themselves if they feel like they're not being productive enough or doing enough, yet they work relentlessly towards their goals and overcoming obstacles. It's hard for them to recognize their achievements or to feel proud of themselves.

🧡 Unaspected planets in the birth chart tend to manifest as a very pure representation of that planet. For example, an unaspected moon can be very emotionally expressive and reactive. Emotions run freely here. An unaspected mars needs to be busy all the time, high stress and aggression can be hard to keep under control, and they can be very competitive.

🧡 The house Venus is in is crucial to understanding someone's values and what they need to feel loved and appreciated. For example, I know a 3rd house Venus who talks to me a lot about how much they can't stand miscommunication and liars. They really value open and honest communication. I plan on creating an in-depth Venus post in the future :)

🧡 This might be an unpopular opinion, but I found my Jupiter return to be pretty underwhelming. I experienced a lot of ease in my life and I feel like I was able to get out of difficult situations pretty quickly, but other than that it wasn't quite what I've seen it made out to be. I've had quite a few people in my life have Jupiter returns recently and it was underwhelming for them as well. It's possible my 12th house profection year and 12th house Saturn transit was overshadowing my Jupiter return though.

🧡When Venus transits my 3rd and 9th houses, I notice I have a stronger desire to travel during these periods. I just want to be out and about and exploring new places and new cities. I'm usually a big homebody, but during these transits I don't feel that as much.

🧡When Sun transits my 8th and 12th houses, this is always the most painful time for me every single year. I just feel a heaviness stronger than usual and a lot of my old wounds get brought up again. This can be a really helpful time to clear out negative energy that's been stagnant for so long and start fresh once the transit ends.

🧡Pisces is by far the most sensitive sign, while Cancer is the most emotional. I feel like a lot of people misinterpret the sensitivity of Pisces as just being sad, but overall they just feel and can pick up on all the energy around them and can even have periods of apathy as a way to cope. I've also known many Pisces that struggle with anger issues as an unhealthy expression of their sensitivity.

🧡With the people you're closest to, you might see them as being their moon sign more than their sun sign. This is because you've likely seen the deepest parts of them that other's don't usually get to see.

🧡The intensity of Aries and Scorpio synastry is next level. Their connections are filled with passion and sexual chemistry. Unfortunately, that lust tends to be all that's really there for them. All that mars energy is quick and hot, but the flame doesn't last forever, unless there's more harmonious synastry between them of course.

🧡I've found 9th house Jupiter people to be incredibly smart and wise beyond their years. They can have a very deep understanding of life and the world around them. Excellent teachers and role models.

🧡I think Saturn conjunct Moon is one of the most challenging aspects to have in a natal chart. There can be this lifelong feeling of being depressed or dissatisfied, like they're cold and empty inside. They can feel disconnected to their feelings and feel emotionally starved because of this. Their mother could have been very strict and unloving and played a huge role in these feelings. Constantly feeling like they're not good enough. Just an overall very harsh placement that I feel for a lot.

🧡I've noticed that water signs tend to be very naturally inclined to spirituality. It can just be something they feel drawn to and resonate with easily. They openly embrace ideas about the universe that most people are skeptical about.

🧡Leo mercuries have the most beautiful talking voices. Their emotions shine through their voices so effortlessly. So charismatic as well. They know how to keep conversations lively.

🧡I've known so many Aquarius risings and all of them have this "goofy" persona about them that's hard to even fully describe. They just love to be a little bit silly. They also pride themselves super strongly on being unique from others. It really bothers them to feel like they're in a box or a stereotype of any sorts.

[ddarker-dreams]

How do you think the husband rotation +Honorary member Anaxa fairs in a soulmate AU?

(i went with a yan red string of fate AU 👀...)

anaxa is the most interested in the nuances of the soulmate system itself out of this bunch. how are soulmates assigned? is it based on compatibility, and if so, how is compatibility determined? initially, he's a skeptic. he dislikes the idea of some unknowable, cosmic force influencing his fate. he'd try and fight against it — and you by extension — only to discover the futility of it all. ironically, his insistence that he can 'sever' this incorporeal bond brings you both closer. had this claim came from anyone else, you'd doubt them, but your professor is a renowned genius. if anyone could accomplish such a feat, it'd be him. you trust him wholeheartedly. this trust is why you don't question the increasingly invasive nature of his experiments. by the time you realize he's long abandoned his former cause to detangle your fates, it's too late. he's bound you to him across space and time, weaving a tapestry that will haunt your future incarnations across infinite timelines.

blade feels bad for you. he's certain that all the times you gazed expectantly at your pinky, you never would've imagined a man like himself would be on the other end. the cruel loom of destiny spun your misfortune so that he might have a sliver of happiness. it isn't fair, he thinks, but neither is the hand he's been dealt. that's why for all his pity, he'll never let you go. if anything, it makes his grip tighter. blade's only ever at peace when you're together. his mara falls silent; the ache of immortality eases. you make him feel like living isn't such a curse after all. though he doubts he can inspire similarly warm feelings, he tries his best, to mixed success. of those listed here, he's the easiest to barter with. he has a hard time saying no to you unless it's an outrageous request.

chrollo didn't expect meeting you to have such a profound impact on his life. everything feels more vivid, more meaningful somehow. he sees you in the little details. he always held this sentiment that should he ever fall for another, he'd fall hard, and that's proven true. outwardly, he appears the same as ever, except to those who have known him since childhood. pakunoda in particular notices how you elicit an almost boyish quality in him, like he hadn't been forced to grow up too soon. however, there's no erasing or overwriting the past. he's still the feared leader of the phantom troupe, only now he's gotten a taste of genuine contentment. this makes him dangerous. how could he ever do without you? there's no cost too high, even if it must be paid in blood.

gojo decides he should be the center of your universe and won't settle for anything less. the red string lets him know where you are all the time, he can sense your presence no matter how much space you put between you. he swears he tried to be normal about you, but he'll freely admit that he's a lost cause. he knows you bring out the worst in him but he doesn't bother fighting it. gojo can handle any venom you sling his way — he even welcomes your spite — it's your apathy he doesn't handle well. he should be the one on your mind, troubling your thoughts. anyone else that tries wrestling this spot from him will not fare well. dealing with him is a pain. he has to be the ultimate influence on you or he'll be in a constant state of agitation.

scaramouche is especially terrifying because he thinks you're owed to him. at the same time, he has difficulty grappling with how long it took for you to come along. it's unfair, but he blames you for the centuries of loneliness he experienced, as if you cursed him. when your paths finally cross and you see he's linked to you, you'll wonder if there's been some mistake. he's far from ecstatic. he rebukes you with bitterness you couldn't hope to understand. the space where his heart should be aches. why are you meeting now, when he's jaded and misanthropic? what a cruel joke! after your poor first impression, you assumed he'd want nothing to do with you, but that isn't the case. he has you under constant surveillance. he rereads the reports on your activities until they're burned into his retinas. it's not long until he's running out of ways to convince himself he doesn't like you.

[noctiva]

Can we get headcanons on WHY theyd break up? Also do you think any of the pastas would cheat?!

I shall keep this one more short and sweet since the last two posts really hold a lot of the answers

so why’d you guys break up?

Toby:

If he breaks up with you: It’s because you did something absolutely unforgivable. eg. cheated, kept a big lie from him and he found out, undermined/made fun of his trauma

If you break up with him: It’s probably because his love is suffocating. It’s cute at first, the way he wants to spend every waking hour of the day with you, the way he’s so protective of you. but, it’ll come at the cost of your freedom. he’s insecure to a fault, and it always comes back to bite him.

Jack:

If he breaks up with you: It’s because he believes he’s doing you more harm than good. In his eyes, you’re sabotaging yourself by being with him instead of some nice, normal - human - man. He thinks he’s doing you a favour.

If you break up with him: It’s because he’s a tough nut to crack. Trying to get into Jack’s mind is like trying to kick down an iron door. The allure of the silent, aloof type can only last for so long.

Brian:

If he breaks up with you: It’s because he can’t handle the work/life balance. He tried to take a shot, tried to fall back into the motions of having a normal life - but it all just feels like a sham. Probably swears off dating completely afterwards.

If you break up with him: It’s because it always feels like he’s hiding something. Like he’s biting his tongue. All that honey sweet charm just a sticky trap that caught you like a fly. He’ll never admit that he’s hiding something from you, but you just know he is. You can’t take the stress from constantly second guessing everything he says.

Tim:

If he breaks up with you: His reasoning is quite similar to Jack’s. He feels like he’s doing you a disservice by keeping you around. By letting you fall deeper and deeper in love with someone who finds it easier to show violence than affection. He’s sure you’ll thank him in the future.

If you break up with him: It’s because you thought you could fix him, and you couldn’t. You truly hoped that maybe your love could patch his wounds and coax out the man buried deep down. You couldn’t, and it’s too tiring to keep trying.

Cody:

If he breaks up with you: It’s because he can’t give you the time he knows you crave. He’s too consumed in his work. Appreciative of your presence, but reluctant to pull himself out of the lab in favour of catering to you. He knows you don’t deserve that.

If you break up with him: It’s for the exact same reason. He’s just barely there. Barely around, both mentally and physically. Even if he lets you into the lab with him, he’s often so engrossed in his tasks he barely acknowledges you. It’s exhausting to constantly be begging for his attention.

Habit:

If he breaks up with you: It’s just because he grew bored. He never loved you like you loved him, he just found you entertaining and easy to play with. But once you grow accustomed to him - once you start welcoming the pain instead of cowering away from him - it’s not as fun. Like a broken doll.

If you break up with him (or try to lol): There’s a laundry list of reasons. The psychological torment, the way he treats you more like a toy than a partner, the violence, his apathy towards anything and everything - including your emotions. It was only a matter of time until you broke.

and then would any of them cheat? hmmmmm. I really can’t picture any of them cheating on this list except for habit probs. MAYBE. MAYBE! Brian but it would definitely just be a one time drunk lapse of judgement where he immediately goes “oh fuck.” when he sobers up. he is simply too charming. if you catch him on a bad night he might be privy to give in.

[anthurak]

Something I think is very much worth considering when analyzing the oppressive, classist societal system we’re seeing in Helluva Boss, most notably in the latest episode:

Satan is not really a ‘tyrant’ in the way I think a lot of people have started viewing him as. At least, he’s NOT some ‘usurper’ who has ‘seized power’ in Lucifer’s absence and now ‘rules with an iron fist’ with no one powerful enough to stand against him. For one, I think it’s pretty clear that this position as the ‘Lawman of Hell’ is a role that Satan has always held, even before Lucifer left.

Rather, let’s consider the fact that while Satan might be the one enforcing this oppressive system, he is FAR from the only one supporting or BENEFITING from it.

We have Mammon, possibly Leviathan, and basically the ENTIRE Goetia royalty who are clearly in FULL, enthusiastic support of this system.

Meanwhile Leviathan and Belphagor (assuming the former isn’t in full support of this system like Mammon) seem to be either too apathetic or too blissed out to really care, which likely also applies to pretty much any ‘not enthusiastically classist/racist’ Goetia as well.

Which just leaves Asmodeous and Beelezbub and MAYBE a handful of Goetia like Vassago who actually DO care and want to do something to help.

Really, I think the ‘vote’ we saw this episode is a clear demonstration of why there is only so much Ozzie and Bee can actually do. They are outnumbered, even among their fellow Sins.

I think it’s not so much that Satan ‘seized’ power in Lucifer’s absence. Rather, without Lucifer there is no one to truly CHECK the power that Satan already has. Sure, maybe a majority of the other Sins might be able to do that as well, but as we see, THAT isn’t happening either.

Satan is not some all-powerful tyrant running an oppressive system. While he may be considered the ‘face’ of that system, he is simply the enforcer of an oppressive system run by many powerful people who benefit from it. With any in power who might want to change things being too few to really do anything about it.

This is why I feel like what we are seeing here is not so much setup for conflict in Helluva Boss, but rather setup for a future plotline in Hazbin Hotel.

Because unlike Blitzo, Stolas or even Ozzie and Bee, CHARLIE is in fact someone who COULD do something about all this.

Even without Lucifer’s help (who I imagine will be indisposed due to other factors for the sake of not making all this TOO easy), Charlie DOES have the influence, charisma and if all else fails the raw strength to actually change things.

Whether by giving Asmodeus and Beelzebub the support they need, snapping/slapping Belphagor and Leviathan out of whatever detached apathy they’re in or maybe just giving Satan, Mammon and the entire Goetia court a brutal ass-kicking.

Probably all of the above.

All in all, I think Satan is a really great example of an antagonistic character who is very much A 'bad guy', but at the same time is not THE 'Bad Guy'. In the thematic sense that Satan is very much part of the oppressive system yet is very much NOT the root cause of it.

And in the narrative sense; both short-term in the fact that Andrealphus is very much the actual 'main bad guy' of this episode, and in the long-term of Satan likely being much more of an antagonist for Charlie in Hazbin Hotel, rather than anyone in Helluva Boss.

[thatsonemorbidcorvid]

“Many dozens of respondents on the receiving end of flaking ascribed the phenomenon to growing levels of social fragmentation because of social media and smartphones, a general sense of apathy in the population and an increasing normalisation of inconsiderate behaviour in the interest of personal needs and desires…

Although some conceded that widespread precarity and poor health were factors, many accused friends of treating their friendships as if they are transactions they felt entitled to withdraw from or invest in as it suited them, and of using stress or their mental health as an excuse to escape personal accountability…

One volunteer organiser for a non-profit from Canada said the number of no-shows to his events had increased several-fold. “At one point,” he said, “I scheduled a lecture with 45 registrants, only to have three arrive.”

“[What drives flaking?] I think a culture that encourages people to be increasingly inward looking, always thinking about themselves, how they feel, what they want,” said Fiona, 40, from Dublin. “People don’t seem to think about how flaking might disappoint or hurt the feelings of their friends. Their thinking seems to only go as far as ‘ugh, I’m not in the mood’.”

“I have noticed a rise in people cancelling plans,” said Tim, 44, a solicitor from Canberra, Australia. “It can be annoying, but I also understand the feeling of something seeming like a good idea when it is in the future, then not feeling like going [on the day]. I have adjusted my mindset so I almost expect 50% of [everyday] social plans not to happen.”

Tim was among people from the UK, the US, Australia and elsewhere who shared with the Guardian how they experienced “flaking” – the cancelling of plans at often short notice owing to not being in the mood, feeling demotivated or tired, or wanting to do something else instead – a phenomenon that many felt had become more prevalent.

“I think the main driver of flaking is that everyone is burnt out,” Tim said. “I feel like I am under constant communication bombardment. Most social events are planned for the evening or weekend, which is the precise time you just want a break from people. I definitely have stronger feelings of not wanting to do things when the time comes.”

Like countless threads about flaking on platforms such as Reddit, people shared how friends and family members had, often at the last minute, dropped out of smaller everyday occasions such as lunch dates and long-planned gatherings – trips and concerts, but also birthdays, weddings and funerals.

Many dozens of respondents on the receiving end of flaking ascribed the phenomenon to growing levels of social fragmentation because of social media and smartphones, a general sense of apathy in the population and an increasing normalisation of inconsiderate behaviour in the interest of personal needs and desires.

Being able to just send a quick text to cancel, various people said, meant people did not have to face those they stood up and incentivised late cancellations.

Although some conceded that widespread precarity and poor health were factors, many accused friends of treating their friendships as if they are transactions they felt entitled to withdraw from or invest in as it suited them, and of using stress or their mental health as an excuse to escape personal accountability.

Various professional event organisers and business owners who responded to the callout also reported a rise in no-shows post-Covid – for commitments such as dentist and hairdresser’s appointments, ticketed events, job interviews or business meetings.

One volunteer organiser for a non-profit from Canada said the number of no-shows to his events had increased several-fold. “At one point,” he said, “I scheduled a lecture with 45 registrants, only to have three arrive.”

“[What drives flaking?] I think a culture that encourages people to be increasingly inward looking, always thinking about themselves, how they feel, what they want,” said Fiona, 40, from Dublin. “People don’t seem to think about how flaking might disappoint or hurt the feelings of their friends. Their thinking seems to only go as far as ‘ugh, I’m not in the mood’.”

Like others, Fiona harboured concerns that “the acceptance of flakiness might contribute to the growth of loneliness in society”.

“Increasingly with gen Z and millennials there is a fetishisation of introversion,” said Andrew, 23, from Brisbane who works in telecoms sales. “Web comics and memes make a moral comparison to extroverts, who are supposedly loud, obnoxious people. Introverts are [depicted as] moral people who own cats and crochet. But our generation is also experiencing record high loneliness, so I think we shouldn’t praise choosing loneliness or celebrate [extreme levels of] introversion.”

On the other end of the spectrum were dozens of respondents who reported that they were increasingly cancelling plans themselves, with many of them saying this was the result of permanent exhaustion, work stress, poor mental health or a lack of funds.

Many from this camp said they felt no need any longer to apologise for prioritising their personal needs over those of others. “I would argue that these are all reasons why flakiness is not actually people cancelling for no reason, but a legitimate response to how society is now structured and the lifestyles we lead,” said Bethan, from Yorkshire.

A woman from Canada called Tabitha described the concept of flakiness as “ableist”. “People aren’t ‘flaky’ for prioritising their mental and physical health instead of ‘roughing it out’ to attend inconsequential things,” she said.

“I have noticed a rise in ‘flaking’ but it’s been welcome, and I’ve certainly been a perpetrator,” said a 43-year-old artist from Melbourne. “There’s been a sense of absolute understanding and relief.”

Few people, she said, wanted to go out these days. “Fewer people drink, the cost of living is high and everyone has a mountain of responsibilities, not to mention burnout and anxiety. Unless it’s a significant birthday or wedding, I’m not quite sure why one would agree to gather in the first place. These days I’ll take any excuse to cancel last-minute and it feels like self-care.”

A 35-year-old architect and small business owner from Perth said: “When I get flaked on, I feel relieved that I have an excuse to not have to leave the house. I have always wanted to be a flaky person, but society didn’t let me. Now that [many others] have given up, I feel like I let myself go, too.

“I love my friends and I do want to catch up with them – but I wish I could do so from the comfort of my own bed.” She did “feel bad”, she said, “for all the social butterflies that are getting their going out dreams crushed.”

A number of people referenced the feeling that attending social gatherings no longer yielded the “rewards” it used to in the past, with costs having increased and other participants being tired or disinterested.

Libby, 70, a retired healthcare professional from Western Australia, worried about flaky behaviour threatening people’s reputations, friendships and social cohesion, and raised concerns about “very short-term thinking” becoming the norm.

A family member, she said, had been a no-show for a close family wedding. “They gave zero notice. When I confronted her, she was totally unapologetic. Her mother pretty much told me she’d been invited to a weekend away with friends, a more attractive offer, apparently. I have lost all respect for them.”

Many of those who complained about flaky friends and family said it had substantially affected their self-esteem and trust in people, with various people saying they had stopped organising gatherings entirely because of the “logistical nightmare” of increasing numbers of people dropping out or wanting to amend plans multiple times to suit their needs better.

“I’m not sure if flakers see that their flaking eats away at the basic fabric of the friendship. At the end of the day, all relationships are built on trust, and to flake, constantly at least, is to break that trust,” said Tristan, 38, from Surrey who works in film production.

“People just feel like they don’t owe anybody anything any more, but they also just don’t want the scrutiny of others,” said a graduate in her late 20s from Devon.

“Everyone can upload things to their [social media] profiles that’ll make them look like they’re on top of the world, but these curated images aren’t real and wouldn’t hold up in conversation at a party. It’s all really unhealthy.”

Many mourned the loss of longstanding friends who, various people felt, had harmed themselves and others by retreating from their social obligations.

“I think many people who feel generally good about having become more flaky don’t realise that they are slowly manoeuvring themselves off the pitch,” said Lara, 37, a business consultant from London.

Her old university friendship group, she said, had originally been very diverse, a mix of high achievers and dreamers, extroverts and introverts. Over the past few years however, the group had gradually shrunk as some people had “excluded themselves” by routinely withdrawing from social events.

“Those of us who still meet up regularly – we started off as drinking buddies in halls, but today we flag professional or even romantic opportunities to each other, recommend investment strategies, doctors, childminders, schools, contractors, affordable holiday rentals ... It’s mostly a support group that helps us all navigate life better, and many of us have been thriving to a significant degree because we stayed in it.”

Several respondents described their increasing inability to keep an appointment as “self-sabotage”, among them Kevin, a 39-year-old researcher from Vancouver, Canada, who felt defensive but also ambivalent about his behaviour.

Flaking allowed him, he said, to avoid situations that required him to address personal issues and conflict. “It has taken me ages to begin to accept this about myself, but I hate making plans and regret it almost every time,” he said.

Kevin blamed people’s growing tendency to cancel on ever-increasing amounts of “labour” – both “actual hours worked” as well as historically high levels of “shadow work” for consumers, such as assembling furniture, pumping gas or self-checkouts.

“Then factor in all the garbage we have to do on our phones now – how many hours a month do we spend creating online accounts and downloading apps and managing bugs and making complaints, just to park the car or order groceries?”

Worsening public services, he felt, also forced people to do more childcare, eldercare and self-care. “So that person is supposed to show up for a park walk with an acquaintance on a rainy Tuesday evening because they said they would? Nah.”

“It’s really terrible,” said Ellie, an interpreter from London in her 30s. “I loved my old friends, but they used to stand me up all the time. After years of progressively worsening levels of flakiness since the pandemic, to the point where nobody invited me ever and nobody turned up when I organised something, I realised I needed different, more resilient friends – people with the capacity to give. It’s scary to think about where all this will end.”

[rebelspykatie]

Part 3

ao3 - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

Eddie’s pretty sure he’s never thought about kissing another guy. He rarely thinks about kissing anybody. For the longest time, he was convinced that no one would ever want to kiss him, so he never saw the point in dwelling on it. 

But maybe that was unusual. He might have mistaken his apathy for normalcy when really he’s the freak. The average person probably thinks about kissing an awful lot. He’s listened to Jeff talk about asking out Lacy from his calculus class and Gareth go on and on about how unfair it is that he can’t make out with his boyfriend behind the bleachers to know that the average high schooler is pretty horny. 

Yet, Eddie’s childhood wasn’t littered with school yard crushes. There aren’t fond memories of girls that he imagined sneaking off with during lunch period or recess. There’s just…nothing. A part of that was his rocky childhood and jumping from his parents, to just his dad, to Wayne. But a lot of it was pure disinterest in the hottest girl in their grade growing breasts before all the other girls, or how tenth grade Mandy would make out with anyone with the right incentive. 

He’s never thought about it long enough for anything to stick. He figured, one day, when he was old enough to escape Hawkins and all the small minded bigots who think he’s a devil worshiper, that he would find a girl that appreciated his specific eccentricities. That he’d settle down somewhere quiet, a little closer to the city than Hawkins, and find some blue collar job and start a family. That’s just what everyone does, right?

He knows that’s not true, though. That everyone doesn’t follow that path. He knows people like Gareth and Robin, and apparently Steve, don’t get to just walk into happily ever after. There’s no white picket fence in their future, and Eddie’s never had to confront that reality so head on before. He knows what it’s like to be different. To have a target on your back. But, it’s nothing like the ostracization of being gay. 

Thinking about kissing Steve scares him. When he closes his eyes, it’s a looping replay of that day. Steve’s soft lips on his unmoving ones. Big hands cradling his face. He can perfectly recall the terror and confusion. It’s seeped into his bones now, because he’s realized something about himself and he doesn’t know what to do with the information. 

He can do nothing. He can move forward and pretend that he doesn’t wake up panting, picturing Steve on top of him pressing him into the mattress with their faces attached. He doesn’t ever have to acknowledge that for the first time in twenty years of living, he’s having honest to god wet dreams that involve another person. And that person he’s envisioning is a guy. Everything can just be swept under the rug.

But he’s pretty sure it scares him more to know that he can’t. It’s eating away at him. Eddie feels trapped in his own skin. The truth is clawing its way to the surface, wanting to break free, even if Eddie’s shutting down as it tries to spill out. He knows it’s inevitable, that overflow. The dam breaking. 

It takes an intervention to set everything in motion. Wayne’s been fussing over him for weeks. He’s been doing that worried parent thing that he thinks Eddie doesn’t know about, where he stands outside Eddie’s closed bedroom door like he wants to knock and say something, but doesn’t. He’s studying Eddie over their morning cereal like the little floating letters are going to spell out why Eddie’s been holed up in his room almost mute. 

But the final straw is when Wayne comes home from work to Eddie painting figurines on the stairs of their new trailer while pretending that he’s not watching Steve help Max fold laundry next door. There’s this polite distance between them and Eddie that didn’t exist before, this wide expanse where before Eddie would’ve been sitting on the picnic table in front of Max’s trailer teasing both of them, or maybe helping if it was a low pain day. 

Instead, he’s sat like a toddler in timeout, taking furtive peaks over the little paint brushes and praying that Max’s sharp intuition about situations like this is dulled by her literal lack of being able to see Eddie from over there. Steve can see him, though, and Eddie’s feigning that it doesn’t bother him. What a grave he’s dug for himself here. 

“Boy, don’t you think this has gone on long enough?” Wayne sighs as he climbs out of his truck, this world-weary, too knowledgeable sigh that makes Eddie squirm. 

“I don’t know what you mean, old man.” Better to just play ignorant. Even though Eddie’s pretty sure he can’t escape Wayne’s withering gaze. He hasn’t in over ten years, so he likely won’t be starting now. 

Wayne just stares at him. A raised eyebrow and crossed arms that tell Eddie he means business. He’s not getting out of this. 

Eddie’s jaw shifts and he looks down at the figure in his hands. “I don’t really know what to do, Wayne.” 

“Move over,” Wayne says, settling down beside Eddie until they’re shoulder to shoulder, barely waiting for the little shuffle Eddie does to make room. He doesn’t say anything for a moment. Just stares across the yard in the same direction Eddie was moments before, a contemplative look on his face. “This about that boy?”

Eddie follows his gaze over to Steve. His silence goes on a little too long before he softly says, “yeah.” 

Wayne hums, still looking at Steve. “You know, you always were a late bloomer.”

That grabs Eddie’s attention. He turns towards Wayne, who takes that as his cue to continue, and sets down the figure behind them. 

“Nothing ever happened when I thought it would when you were a boy. Lizzy said you took forever to walk and talk. I kept waiting for you to come to me about the birds and the bees, but you didn’t. Not sure if that was a good thing to let go, but I knew you weren’t getting yourself into trouble. Probably wasn’t much I could offer you that public school wasn’t already teaching you.” 

Eddie wonders briefly if he should’ve hidden the condoms in his room better, but maybe that’s what gave Wayne the confidence to leave Eddie to his business. Even if they were collecting dust before they became dust that day the trailer cracked open.

“You never brought anyone around.” He nods in the direction of Steve. “Not until him.” 

The conversation with Steve is distantly replaying in his head. How he went over their every interaction with Robin and they came to this same conclusion. Maybe Eddie really is an idiot. 

“It wasn’t intentional,” Eddie adds. “I didn’t know what I was doing.” 

“I don’t think anyone knows what they’re doing, son. That’s part of life.” He pats Eddie on the back. “It’s ‘specially a part of being in love.” 

Eddie’s not sure he’s willing to start that train of thought, yet. He’s grateful for the quiet, unspoken acceptance, but he’s not ready to think about labeling it something as profound as love. He flounders for a second before saying, “I think I’ve missed my chance there,” as he looks back over at Steve. 

“Are you dead and I don’t know it?” He squeezes Eddie’s shoulder. “Seem pretty real to me.” He whacks Eddie’s head gently. “Ain’t nothing missed if you’re still alive to make things right.” 

“Hey!” Eddie laughs, mock offended at the attack, rubbing the back of his head and leaning away from Wayne. “Isn’t it socially unacceptable to joke about someone that was legally dead for almost three minutes?”

“I think I get leeway as the one that kept you alive for ten years by myself.” Wayne wrangles him into a side hug, pulling him to his chest with an arm around his neck. “Just cause things are broken, doesn’t mean you can’t fix ‘em, son.”

[sleepingpopplio]

The Powerful Theme Behind BNHA’s Nuanced Ending

As I’m posting this we only have one more chapter of the manga and I don’t know how the ending is going to exactly play out, but I do know one thing. The deaths of Toga and Tenko were not in vain, and the author is still trying to give readers hope while also still maintaining some realism and bitter-sweetness in his messaging. Therefore, this is what I think Horikoshi is trying to tell his readers, especially the young people who have their whole lives ahead of them to make a difference on the world:

I see how this theme, the one that’s been built up throughout this manga yet simultaneously feels like it’s coming out of left field, is one of those themes that is a hard pill to swallow. Basically, no matter how hard we can try and push to do good and help others/make the world a better place, we’ll often fail again and again. A lot of bad things can happen, society can choose to remain apathetic, and it can seem like nothing’s ever gonna change because you just put all that hard work in towards the future for nothing. However, even if sometimes you can’t save everyone or society keeps trying to push issues under the rug, that doesn’t mean we should give up trying to fight for social issues we care about. We might never get to see the perfect world Deku and Urarak dream of, and Tenko and Toga may be gone, but their fight for a good and accepting world will someday be worth it cus their actions do have weight by showing that redemption is possible, even if no one has seen it except them. Young people like them just have to make sure to leave their mark so that others can follow.

My Hero Academia is about how we all can become the greatest hero, not by magically destroying the world’s problems and apathy overnight, but instead by continously reaching out a helping hand to people who might not initially seem like they want it.

[drabbles-about-crk]

Do you have a plan for what happens when the beasts/virtues meet their other halves again, like when the ancients are back in their original time?

For Shadow Milk and Pure Vanilla, a vague idea was made when we started the rp, but I won’t say anything for certain. That will develop with the rp. All I will say is Shadow Milk is even more desperate for Pure Vanilla when he realizes he is his crush he thought he accidentally killed.

For the rest, it differs slightly from canon and each other.

If you saw those fake Chinese (I think that was the language) leaks, Mystic Flour absolutely wants to take Dark Cacao as a trophy after she forces him to accept apathy. Then he will be the only person at her side when all others are returned to flour. Maybe Dark Choco and Cloud Haetae will be spared in her grand plan. Even in her apathetic guise, she does still care for some people and she could not destroy the child that appears so much like her love and fell to corruption just as she did, nor her loyal dog-child.

Without deciding if the Beasts could see out of the soul jam and he learns that way. Burning Spice finds out the merchant cookie who confessed to him and disappeared holds the other half of his soul jam. Or not. I can see both ideas being fun. Him not realizing the two, his crush and soul jam thief are one and the same until after he rips her wings. Or him very aware they are and thinking she is just as durable as he was with the soul jam rips them off thinking she could simply regrow them. Either way he is going to have a lot to make up for.

Eternal Sugar is cleaning the garden area she made specially for Hollyberry and where she planned to confess the depths of her feelings. She is more desperate for her to stay giving the last time she let her nervousness and sensibilities win out. When she summons the hollyberrians, she tries to get Pavlova, the Eros to her Aphrodite, to interact with Royalberry and his family. She wants both sides of their families to get along after all. This might make Pavlova to actually join the escape hoping Eternal Sugar will accept it as he staying with his future step-family.

Silent Salt is a mystery to me. There is a reason I spoke little of any interactions between them and White Lily. I want to wait still we have actual confirmed interactions. All I can say is that they is very confused about Dark Enchantress and her minions. She is a part of their love, but she and White Lily the soul jam holder are very much separate as of now.

[makeyoumine69]

Hello dear people in my beloved American Psycho fandom! I couldn't force myself to write this post because I didn't know how to do it, but I think now is the right time. I promised myself not to bring personal stuff into my writing, but since one thing affects another, I think I should finally speak up.

This year started pretty bad for me, I was suffering from a huge apathy and my mental health was probably in the worst state in the last few years. I had to cut ties with a lot of people and distance myself, and I'm really sorry for doing that, but I had no choice because I was literally dying from the inside. When I came back to Tumblr in 2022, I was absolutely alone and I had no friends, no followers and in some ways I felt calm and peaceful. I always thought and probably still think that I should be alone and isolated from everyone, like a soulless writing machine just producing fanfictions for people to consume. Maybe this is not a bad thing, because interacting with people always carries the risk of getting bruised?

Anyway, the thing that broke me completely was the news I received in the last days of January that I would be fired in February because my company decided to close the project I was working on due to the high inflation and bad economic situation in Russia. So now I have to find a job within February because I have a lot of financial responsobilities like paying for the medical treatment my family is getting. My grandmother was diagnosed with kidney cancer and her surgery was paid for by me and my fiancé, but the medicine costs a lot, so… after I told my mom about my news, she blamed me for everything. I was not really surprised though, considering that I have been having fights with my whole family for the past few months over different topics, but mostly they hate me for my political opinions. Whenever I say that I am tired of the war, sanctions and all the other stuff that 2022 has brought, they call me a fucking traitor. My family is ready to cancel me just because I told them I was tired of living in isolation, that I had even forgotten what my life was like before the war. My fiancé is literally the only person in my family who supports me, and even though I'm going to lose my job, he told me he would do anything for me, for us, but I don't want to be a burden. I'm really scared about the future, I think I really am now.

So, I'm sorry for not finishing the Christmas fics I promised to post, I'll try to finish them soon. Also, I'm sorry for not being active with fulfilling the requests and replying to your asks. I'm really sorry. And I know some of you might think that why I keep writing new series and working on different stuff while I have WIPs I need to finish—I'm just trying to follow my muse and I can say that it's really unstable these days, but I'm really trying to do my best and deliver something good for all of you!

I also want to thank all of you who have supported me with your donations! It means the world to me! Unfortunately, my account on the platform I was using for donations has been suspended because of… DOLLARS! They think I'm a scammer or something because the dollar is such a cursed currency in Russia right now, so I don't know if they'll unban my account, I hope they will.

Okay, that was longer than I thought it would be. To end this crazy rant, I just want to thank you guys for sticking with me no matter how fucked up I might be! I believe that one day I will find my way back to myself so that I can come back strong and refreshed!

[grandpa-swamp]

rambling about my thoughts of Waelin becoming (and being separated from) Sheogorath here as these thoughts came to me between dreams last night lol:

I’ve been thinking a lot of how madness would overtake Waelin and what that could look like, because him becoming that kind of… quirky character that is traditional Sheo doesn’t sit right with me. Knowing how serious and grim he can be his madness would reflect that tenfold, an almost eldritch and quiet insanity. He’d probably be largely silent, rarely speaking, only muttering one-word responses or whispering incomprehensible maybe-truths into mortal ears. But more in line with madgod tradition his impulsivity would be dialed to 11, often making serious decisions and irrevocable disasters occur on a whim- cuz he ‘felt like it.’ But all this with a completely straight, deadpan face, hardly even laughing at or enjoying his own acts of insanity.

He’d go blind (literally and metaphorically), losing sight of the noble knight he ever was. He’d be so sedentary that he’d go years without moving from his seat in the Shivering Isles. His ‘favorite’ pastime would probably just be watching the mortal world fall to shit without him around, eager to see if one day it’d all just end before his very face. He’d screw with mortals every now and then, mostly his own worshippers for bothering him by means of prayer or summoning. Hell he might have even had a hand in the Void Nights (which correct me if I’m wrong but there is no definitive reason for this event I think?) but given how much I like to draw comparison of Waelin to Lorkhan I think it’s a fun little connection.

Oh but I think he’d set his sights on completely fucking with his fellow Daedric Lords even more in traditional Sheo fashion. Especially any lord who has fucked with him in the past, like Mehrunes and Azura. Just whatever he could do to spite them all, to infiltrate their plans and wreak havoc to their worshippers.

None of the Daedra would recognize him as the man he was before, none but Hermaeus Mora- who would know his past and glimpses of his future (esp way down the line with being Dragonborn and with Miraak). Herma would probably be the only one to not outright despise Sheo-Waelin, instead interested in learning about the man he was before and what drove him to his circumstances. It only makes sense to me, that the Lovecraftian ripoff prince would be on better terms with the Prince of Madness than the rest lol. Not that Sheo-Waelin would give a shit, only entertaining that mass of eyes and tentacles cuz he had fuck else to do.

And then of course this fun all being cut relatively short when Waelin is returned to his mortal form, when the world does actually need him again. This could have been divine intervention, or simply a mechanic of bearing the hero’s soul (starting a new game, in typical self aware ES fashion). He doesn’t know. He just woke up in that dang cart, still blind, but with a decently clear head, picking up where he left off mentally right before he mantled Sheo.

Obv this is up to every persons interpretation, but in Waelin’s case I think he was blessed as Dragonborn right then and there. Of course this coming as the biggest insult to him for a variety of obvious reasons. Perhaps Waelin’s return to Tamriel was by the hand of Akatosh himself, not only to pay penance for his shirking of duty, but to give him a chance to properly move on. But as I’ve said in other posts he is not happy to be back and almost wants to let the world end around him, still retaining that apathy from when he was a Daedric prince. But thankfully he meets the right people to push him along and get the job done.

Worth mentioning that his split from Sheo was not a clean cut, more like a halving of their spirits. That’s just how I explain why the Sheo you meet in Skyrim still retains memories of being HoK, but acts more like the typical madgod having lost the aspect of Waelin’s personality. Yet still retaining that blindness, Sheo doesn’t recognize (or maybe he does?) Waelin when they meet again, and vice versa in a way. Though they have each other’s memories, they hardly see the other as themselves, and move on as such.

[thelreads]

And that's the end of the chapter. Let us keep this brief: Really good, Anya is putting more breadcrumbs on the floor about her past, Melinda is moving forward and we're so in, Twilight is apparently making peace with his past and focusing on the present, that's also amazing.

Got all that? Good, now let us finish the fucking reading, shall we?

We already got three of the cards: The Future, the Present, and the Past influences. Let us see the other ones:

1 - The Problem

The situation at hand, be it the good or bad of it. We have the Ace of Cups reversed there.

The Ace of Cups upright is a card of Love, intuition, and emotional awakenings, while reversed it is a card of coldness, emptiness, and feeling unloved.

It does match the thing going on, Anya feels like Damian doesn't like her, and being honest he does give her that impression, because he himself is in denial about it.

2 - The Positive influences

Things that are affecting the situation in a positive way, and you should keep doing because it is helping.

The Card here is the Three of Swords. Upright it refers to trauma, grief, sorrow, heartbreak, separation, betrayal, while reversed it refers to recovery, reconciliation, healing.

For it to be here it can mean that there are wounds that have not healed, for both of them, and giving it time for them might be better, because conflicts and third parts might be coming to get in the way.

3 - The Negative influences

It represent things that are being counterproductive for the current situation and should be minimized or avoided.

The card here is the Four of Cups upright, a card that means apathy, indifference, feeling disconnected, while reversed it means awareness, acceptance, choosing happiness.

The meaning here is pretty straightforward, not caring about each other is a problem, both of them need to care for things to work out.

4 - The Past influences

We already covered this one, things that are not working anymore for the current situation and should be let go.

Death upright represents change, transformations, letting go, and reversed it means stagnancy, fear of change, and resisting change.

In that position we can infer that trying to change the relationship between you two is not working. Trying to force him to move to a next step is going to push him farther away, you should be show some restraint in this situation, and go slower.

5 - The Present

Also already covered. What is the current state of the situation so you understand if change is necessary or not.

The Three of Wands upright is a card of momentum, of looking ahead, growing, confidence, and when it's reversed it shows limitations, lack of progress, delays.

For it to be at the Present means that the current situation with Damian is stagnate, that things are not going forward, and that commitment from both of you is needed to make things grow.

6 - The future

Also covered. The future spot is the immediate future of the situation, what will happen the soonest.

Ten of Pentacles upright is a card of Family, ancestry, affluence, tradition, while reversed it is a card of instability, family disputes, and breaking of traditions.

Ten of pentacles in that spot means a relationship successfully and financially stable, and also family approval.

7 - The final outcome

What will be ultimate outcome of the situation, but apparently the name is a bit misleading, because some people claim it only covers a period around six months ahead.

The Star upright is a card of hope, renewal, healing, faith, while reversed it points at negativity, hopelessness, despair.

This card in this position might be a bit of a bad omen, that things might not go smooth, but it also can mean that neither of them is ready for a relationship due to their own inner turmoils, their own insecurities and the harshness they put themselves under. Not even taking into account they are 4-6 here.

SEE MELINDA? THIS IS HOW YOU MAKE A FUCKING READING

[lilu787788]

I know this might be a wish that will never come true, but I wish Aleksander’s opponents could see that his age is not just a number. It is an entire existence stretched across centuries, filled with memories, battles, and an unyielding determination that refuses to fade. Sasha is not just old. He is ancient in a way that very few characters are. He has outlived empires. He has seen kings rise and fall, borders shift, ideologies and religions take hold only to crumble into dust. He has witnessed firsthand what others only know from history books, and even then, history is never told exactly as it was. He has lived through its reality, with all its contradictions, complexities, and harsh truths.

I believe this makes him not only capable but invaluable—a living archive of human nature, war, politics, and survival. And what is most remarkable is that after all these centuries, he is still here. He is still fighting. That alone is extraordinary to me. Most people burn out within a few decades, losing their ideals, their energy, their belief that the fight is worth it. But him? He has lived an entire life filled with disappointments, betrayals, and suffering, and instead of letting them push him into apathy, they have strengthened his purpose. He could have vanished into history, withdrawn from the world, let time erase him. But he refuses. He does not simply exist. He keeps trying. He keeps pushing forward. He keeps reaching for a future where the Grisha will not have to suffer as he did. That kind of willpower, that refusal to surrender even to time itself, is something I find captivating.

His age also brings a complexity that cannot be ignored. Most people have the luxury of seeing the world in black and white because they do not live long enough to watch those absolutes fall apart. Aleksander has seen the same mistakes repeated over and over again—the same betrayals, the same cycles of oppression, the same false hopes for peace. He knows that people do not learn from history. That given enough time, they will always make the same choices, always return to the same selfishness and fear. He does not have the privilege of optimism. He sees the world not as it should be but as it is and as it has always been. And that changes everything. He does not have the luxury of believing in fleeting morality, in half-measures, in waiting for others to do what is right. If he does not act, no one will.

And yet, despite everything, despite all the reasons he could have cut himself off from the world, he still feels. And I think that might be the most extraordinary thing about him. He still loves. He still longs for closeness. He still seeks connection. He still wants love. He still needs understanding and craves belief in him. That is not weakness. That is a kind of strength that is nearly impossible to comprehend. To feel so deeply after so much time, to still allow himself to love when he has every reason not to, is simply astounding.

Then there is the depth of his knowledge, which is another part of what makes him so fascinating and something I love to explore. Aleksander has lived through the events that shaped the world. He was there when rulers fell, when civilizations changed, when ideologies were born and then erased. He has seen things no other living person has seen, and that kind of knowledge is priceless. It sets him apart not only because of what he has witnessed but because of how he understands the world. He carries a perspective that no one else could even begin to grasp. He is not just a relic of the past. He is the past, woven into history itself.

And yet, for all his knowledge, all his experience, all his power, he is not untouchable. He can still be hurt. He is still human in a way that matters, in a way that makes him so much more than an immortal figure standing apart from the world. He has been shaped by time, but he has not been broken by it. That is what makes him stand out, not only among the characters of the Grishaverse but in fiction as a whole.