#menace x the menaced
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justafriend-ql · 1 year ago
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Why do you keep talking to me, bothering me, and pretending to be close to me? I already told you. It's because you're cute. A SHOULDER TO CRY ON Episode 1
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sukunas-wife · 7 months ago
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Yuji stood there with teary eyes, sniffling and ready to scream
His father was sat there with a smug smile staring down at him
You could barely see over your husband’s shoulder who was leaning on his side over your lap. Yuji’s hands coming up reaching for you only to lightly be swatted away by Ryomen
“No, mine.”
Yuji let out a silent cry, Sukuna’s grin widened as you sighed
“Moommmyyy” he tried to push past his dad hands reaching out for you again
“No,” Sukuna swatted his little hands away again, “Mine.”
Yuji let out a small scream and started crying falling back and down onto his little butt, “MooMMMYyyyy”
You had watched this happen for five minutes and you shook your head with a smile, “Come here baby.” Sukuna moved out the way and you lightly shouldered him with a smile, he still had a grin on his face as he picked up Yuji dropping him on your lap
Yuji’s hands clinging to your shirt as he sniffled into your chest, only for Sukuna to lean down to his ear, “still mine.”
Yuji wailed looking up at you before you placed a hand on his head kissing his forehead, his smile was wobbly with teary eyes as he buried his face into your chest again and Sukuna chuckled placing his hand over yours on Yuji’s head. “Heh, brat.”
Tag:
@sakuxxi @mercymccann @certainduckanchor @najiiix @bakugou-katsukis-wife @amitiel-truth @souyasplushie @mylovelessnightmare @ynjimenez @dolliira @princessluvz @furiousblacktiger @anyaswlrd @shytastemakerthing @alialucille
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satoruxx · 5 months ago
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normally toji prides himself on being the perfect guard dog—not that he would ever tell you that. but you never have to worry about guys coming up to you when your hulking monster of a boyfriend remains at your side, continuously glaring down his nose at everyone he sees.
this usually works pretty well.
on adults.
but now, as you and him wait in line at the counter of the grocery store, he can only let out a huff of irritation as he watches the little brat in front of you both stare over his mother’s shoulder—big wide eyes locked on you.
at first you don’t really notice, too busy blabbering about something silly as you look around the store. but when you finally lock eyes with the child, you notice the way he seems to go shy, pressing his cheek deeper into his mom’s shoulder. his eyes flick away from your face for just a second, before timidly looking back. as soon as he does, you break into the sweetest, most giddy smile.
(toji would move mountains for a glimpse of that smile—and yet here this kid is just getting it without a shred of work.)
you tilt your head, raising a hand to gently wave at the boy, who flushes further under your attention, but lifts his cheek a little more. chubby fingers come up to meekly wave back, and you hold back a silent coo of affection, eyes filled with honey-like sweetness. with every little giggle and silly face you make at the boy, he seems to get more and more comfortable—toji watches you melt.
the unlucky little brat then quickly peeks at the giant man looming beside you, and toji can’t resist. his face pulls into a evil smile, teeth on full display as he wiggles his fingers sinisterly. the expression has its desired effect—the kid recoils, eyes going wide before burying his face into his mother’s neck. in a few minutes, the boy and his mom are heading out the store and you and toji start loading the groceries onto the belt.
“i saw that, you know?”
toji glances up, seeing your semi disapproving frown, and he cocks his head in faux innocence. “saw what?”
“you’re mean,” you shake your head, crossing your arms. “scaring little kids like that. quite literally the object of their nightmares.”
“ah, he’ll be alright,” toji grunts, taking the bags from the cashier in one hand and reaching for your palm with the other. “it’ll build his character.”
you snort. “he’ll have trauma.”
“like i said,” he grins, a canine display. “character.”
you roll your eyes as he tugs you out of the store—your grip on him unwilling to falter.
toji lives just like this, successful in scaring off any other person who considers giving you attention, whether that’s an adult or a little kid. and despite your exasperated complaints to at least lay off the children (they’re harmless), toji has known for a long time that he can be nothing but selfish when it comes to you.
so forgive him, if he quickly turns to this evil little tactic to scare away kids—it’s all he can really do. besides, it always works.
until now.
you’re sitting under a tree at a small park, working on some dumb assignment for one of your lectures. toji lays on his back next to you, arm draped over his eyes in a momentary respite from the normal danger of his life—eerily content.
the peace is broken by the rustling of tiny footsteps in the grass.
“here you go.”
toji pulls his arm away to peer at the owner of the voice. a boy stands there, hair tousled as he waits in front of you with his arm outstretched—in between his chubby fingers is a singular dandelion.
your eyes widen, cheeks splitting into a wide smile as you coo out your affection. “aw for me?”
the boy nods mutely, cheeks flushed as he thrusts the flower further into your view. you delicately pluck it from his hands, inhaling the fragrance with a grateful smile. “well thank you. it’s beautiful.”
he shyly kicks at a spot of grass, lips pulling up into a giddy smile under your sweet praise. “just like you,” he mumbles under his breath and you squeal softly, giggling at how adorable this kid truly is.
toji sits up before you can say anything else, lips pulled into a displeased frown as he crosses his bulky arms across his chest. “hey.” his voice comes out low and tense, even as he stares down his nose at the boy. “what are you doing?”
you turn to look at your boyfriend, at the exaggerated sneer that normally works wonders in scaring kids away, and you hold back an exasperated sigh. “toji—“
“who are you?” the boy frowns, sass appearing out of thin air as he looks toji up and down like he’s nothing but dirt under his colorful sneakers. you gape at him, eyes darting back and forth between the two as a smile threatens to make its way into your face. toji’s lips part in surprise, a tingle of heat crawling up his neck as he hears your hushed gasp of held back laughter.
“her boyfriend,” he grunts back, eyes narrowed in a way that’s oddly similar to the expression on the kid’s face.
“no way!” the boy huffs, pouting indignantly. his cheeks flush as he glares at toji—unfazed.
“uh, yes way.” toji realizes how petty he sounds, but he’s adamant—unwilling to stand down in anything that involves you.
the boy crosses his arms, mirroring toji’s pose. he rolls his eyes emphatically, lip curling as he sneers down his nose.
“isn’t she too pretty for you?” he asks bluntly. you smother another disbelieving gasp, and toji suddenly feels an unfamiliar thrill rush through his veins—this kid had guts.
“what do you know, brat?” there’s a smirk evident in toji’s voice now, and he uncrosses his arms to lean back on his palms, eyes shining with feral mirth.
“i have eyes,” the boy snaps back, putting both hands on his hips to appear more intimidating—it doesn’t work, he just looks cuter. “i can see her.”
“well quit it,” toji huffs in return. “not yours to look at.”
the kid narrows his eyes. “you’re mean!”
“and you’re nosy!”
“how am i nosy?”
“you’re comin’ over here and givin’ my girl flowers!”
“she deserves flowers!”
“of course she does! from me, you little brat!”
“you suck, old man!”
“what did you just call me?!”
a shout from across the park disrupts the heated bickering, and you all turn to see an older woman waving the boy over. he looks down at you, a sweet smile washing over his face as he tilts his head innocently. “that’s my mom. i have to go home now.”
“heh, sure thing. get home safe, okay?” you shoot toji an amused glance as you speak, and he sends a displeased glare back as he stubbornly crosses his arms again.
the boy nods, beaming at you. “okay! see you later!” he chirps. but just as he’s about to leave he turns back, eyes fixated on toji. “i hope your boyfriend learns how to be nice!”
and then he runs off.
you snort out another laugh, which only gets louder when you catch a glimpse of the way toji is practically sulking in the corner—scowling at the kid’s back with narrowed eyes.
the whole thing is so unbelievably endearing, and you can’t stop grinning as you pack up your things and stand up.
“let’s go home, toji.” you hold your palm out for him, and you’re rewarded with a pointed glance—he takes your hand anyway. even as you both exit the park, toji has an unamused pout on his face, glaring ahead.
you can’t resist.
“don’t tell me you actually feel threatened now,” you giggle, grabbing his bicep and pressing close. toji glances at you from the corner of his eyes, unamused—which only seems to make you laugh harder. “oh come on! he was so cute!”
“little brat,” he grumbles in return. “couldn’t take a hint.”
“you’re mad because the eight year old kid at the park didn’t want to believe you were my boyfriend?”
“the fuck do you think? of course i am. what do i look like if not your fucking boyfriend?”
you chortle, practically falling on him with the weight of your amusement. he sighs, disgruntled.
“it’s not funny, kid.” toji rolls his eyes at you—internally, he’s trying not to grin.
“it’s so funny, toji.” you straighten up, smiling at him with stars in your eyes. “you’re ridiculous and it’s so cute.”
he scoffs, giving you a sidelong glance before reaching up to tug at your cheek. “i’m definitely not the cute one.” he murmurs offhandedly before internally smirking at the way you seem to be caught off guard by his statement.
“whatever,” you mumble, holding his arm as you both continue walking home in relative silence. from the corner of your eye you can see toji’s expression as he mutely stares ahead, deep in thought. you decide not to disturb him, content on just feeling his warmth bleeding into your palm—always at your side.
toji replays the incident in his head multiple times as you head home. the bickering, the sass, and the unfiltered adoration that little brat seemed to have for you.
something clicks.
as you’re pushing open the door of your apartment, you hear toji quietly chuckle from behind you, and you turn to look at him over you shoulder. “what?”
he shakes his head slowly, eyes shut even as an uncharacteristically soft smile tugs at his lips. “just thinking…”
“about what?” you ask curiously.
toji grins at you, cocking his head fondly. “when we have a kid, i want the little brat to be just like that.”
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sistertotheknowitall · 10 months ago
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I love the idea of Danny being just Some Guy.
Like yes he’s Phantom, yes he has ghost powers, yes he’s the King of the Infinite Realms. But to the BatFam? That is just Some Guy. A random dude - if you will.
They are positively baffled by him. Like he’s completely normal as far as they (and the background check) can see. Yet, he. Is. EVERYWHERE. (Not actually but it sure feels like it.)
The kids have a running bingo card of where he’ll turn up. Outside a warehouse they’re raiding? Check. Stopped a mugging? He was the one being mugged. Tim’s favorite coffee shop? He was just hired as a barista.  Seriously it’s like everytime they turn around he’s there.
Which wouldn’t be such a problem if he REACTED NORMALLY. But no. He doesn’t flee in fear, stare in awe, he doesn’t even try to say thank you. This man looked Batman in the eye and called him the furry vigilante - TO HIS FACE! He casually referred to Dick as “the flying monkey one” to Red Robin while also calling Tim a literal walking Red Flag. When he crosses paths with Duke he doesn’t always speak but he does always give him a snack. (Sometimes it’s candy, sometimes it’s fruit but it’s always food. And he only gives them to Duke.)
He once told Jason that he didn’t care that he was a crime lord and built like a brick house, Danny would kick his ass and drag his “rotted milk soul” too hell if the gun fights kept going on past midnight. (He had exams in the morning damnit.)
He will only call Damian “baby ninja” no matter how many times the kid insists that his name is Robin.
Spoiler and Orphan? The only ones he’s respectful to but even they get the occasional random comment. (“It may be a Tuesday, but if the universe is gonna make me the human equivalent of a pin cushion then I have the right to keep the knife.”) (It was actually a Friday but who were they to argue with a man bleeding out in an alley.)
Eventually the Batkids start keeping score of who has had the most out of pocket thing said to them by this random white boy.
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peachsukii · 30 days ago
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Bakugo would say the most out of pocket things just to get a reaction out of you, followed by that shit eating grin and hollow ‘heh’ every damn time.
You’re out buying new shoes, trying on sneakers when he makes a comment about selling your feet pictures online if his hero rankings take a dip to bring in extra cash.
At his parent’s house for dinner, he takes you into his old bedroom to show you around for the first time. He starts snickering about how loud you are at his place and that he would have never been able to get away with sneaking you into his room.
While getting ready for a hero gala, he tells you to wear “that bra that makes your tits look like planets” so people are too distracted by you to notice his snide remarks, rewarding him with a good word in the press that week.
It’s all in good fun, Bakugo loves teasing you and appreciates that you take his jokes without a fuss. What he doesn’t expect is the first time you retaliate to one of his quips, leaving him wide eyed and shell shocked before he hunches over with laughter.
“Ha, ya finally got the guts to give my shit back’ta me. Game on, loser!”
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mewnekoice-mecha · 6 months ago
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Danny has a Cooking channel
Danny is in Gotham for College or whatever and out of boredom starts a cooking channel on YouTube.
So, picture this Danny is cooking like he’s trying to kill somebody. And never refers to ingredients as their name. And constantly cracks jokes about the recipe he’s cooking from.
This is all well and good until ghosts start asking him to make family recipes passed down from generations, now Danny doesn’t know that there family recipes because the ghost thinks it’s the HIGHEST HONOR for their King to want to cook something from when they were alive.
Cue one day on his channel he makes a pie but not just any pie but a pie MARTHA WAYNE herself created.
Alfred is curious about how this young man knows this recipe, meanwhile Bruce is losing his mind because Danny looks like a male version of his mother.
Ps. Look up Dylan Hollis on YouTube to get what I’m talking about
~Danny cooking something~
“Now add a CUP of Lard”
-Danny sarcastically- YOU DEAD WHITE PEOPLE NEED TO STOP. THIS IS WHY THE GREAT DEPRESSION HAPPENED.
-Also Danny-
“And now we add some CINNAM and blind bake til brown”
“Im sending you to summer school” -Puts pie in oven-
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hoshikorii · 11 months ago
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Family Group hugs
Be a good proton, but keep your expectation down, Caine.
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"..It brings my digital heart GREAT joy to see you're all satisfied and happy!"
"LET GO OF US YOU [@#$%&] PAIR OF DENTURES I SWEAR I-"
"ooh, a chimaera birdwing!"
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yoongi-regulus · 1 month ago
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Regulus: ughhh, don't put food in front of me, I feel nauseous.
Sirius: YOU GOT MY BABY BROTHER PREGNANT?!?!?
James: mate ... he CAN'T GET PREGNANT
Regulus: let me point out, the lack of trying is not the reason
Sirius: *dramatically faints*
James: Reg!
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livelovecaliforniadreams · 7 months ago
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#Buddie Wedding Season 10 Everyone's Invited
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creek-ink · 6 months ago
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which one??
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ref^
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shutupcrime · 4 months ago
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Some of you are too afraid to admit this but we all know Star Wars works best when it goes full soap opera
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anxi04 · 16 days ago
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tim is on the thinnest ice for becoming a supervillain. the gotham rogues don’t know just how thin it is but they are well aware that out of all the bats (yes even the red hood, yk the crime lord) red robin is the one most likely to end up joining their rogue status.
most of the batfam are not aware of this, except for bruce, cass, damian, and jason.
cass knows just from watching him cause of course she does. she also found one of his Completely Normal And Not At All Supervillain-y Plans. she has him tell her the plans so he’s not spending weeks fleshing them out and it’s more like ranting to her. she does however keep an eye on him during his bad days cause some of those plans were concerning
damian was about to kill someone (very deserved, and also very early on in his career) and tim just drops down in front of him so damian is obviously thinking “oh shit he’s gonna tell them and i’ll be cast out of the family and oh god-“ and he just. “want me to help hide it or do you got it?” damian just blinks cause what. he thought tim was gonna be the most strict on the no kill rule
tim actually deliberately let jason know cause he pissed him off once (interrupted his nap). all he did was take over jason’s gang for a week, made it seem like he was red hood without jason knowing what was going on, make it better, and then insult jason and tell him how he could’ve done it EVEN BETTER but he just didn’t feel up to it. jason has both a newfound respect and fear of tim. he’s also a little salty about just how good tim ran his gang but that’s between him and the gods
bruce knows cause one time during tim as robin he rold bruce “if you kill anyone i WILL become a villain and you are NOT prepared.” and then forced bruce to go to sleep. bruce honestly isn’t 100% sure if that was a hallucination or not but he’s leaning to not. he also just doesn’t know what he can do about it cause that kid made him eat, sleep, shower, and take proper care of himself what’s he gonna do? bench him? bench the kid who benches batman once???
steph also learns but that’s cause she stumbled upon him literally about to take that step and instead of doing anything about it just called him edgy and that was enough to shock him back. she’s not gonna become one with tim but she jokes about them having a batman and catwoman relationship and that alone is keeping him from actually doing so
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fiasco95 · 15 days ago
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Regulus on his way home from visiting James, his brother and friends in uni for the weekend.
James, drunk and full on sobbing: I miss my boyfriend! Come back!
James, holding his iPad with Regulus’ mid-laugh picture showing: Bring back my husband(boyfriend) from war (college) It’s been 5 years(5 hours) since I’ve seen him!!!
Sirius, Remus, Peter, Dorcas, Marlene & Lily:
Marlene: Godric, somebody do something about him!!!
Dorcas: Let me call Reg-
Lily: It’s literally 3AM?! Let him sleep! Just because his boyfriend is a clingy and dramatic mess-
Sirius: I’m going commit tonight, murder or su!c!de- I’m debating.
Remus: Sirius-
James, crying louder than before because he heard all of them: I WANT MY BOYFRIEND!!
Peter: Me too.
James:
Sirius, Remus, Peter, Dorcas, Marlene & Lily:
Peter, shrugging: What?
Dorcas did end up calling Reg in the middle of the night and put him on FT with James to get him to shut up so they can all go to sleep in peace.
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satoruxx · 6 months ago
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random but toji definitely torments you with his stubble. it’s not often that he lets it grow, usually pretty quick to shave it down, but whenever he gets a little lazy with it he becomes downright evil.
mostly because he enjoys the way you squeal when the rough texture brushes over your skin. it starts off as an accident, just an honest reaction when you come home one night and he presses a chaste kiss to your throat. he definitely does not expect the way you jump and swat at him, complaining about how his beard is too scratchy and that it tickles.
you can’t blame him for using it to his advantage.
so now whenever he notices that his stubble has gotten a little rough you bet he’s gonna be chasing you around, lips tugging into his trademark smirk as he hears your peals of laughter. it’s a like a game—see how quick he can get his hands on you.
and when he inevitably does you’re already begging over your laughs, going “oh god toji please don’t—!”
but he’s already grabbing your wrist and rubbing it across his chin, hearing the amused whines and complaints as you finally accept defeat. he only chuckles when you call him names and say he’s the worst and such, eagerly diving for your cheek and your neck to be as obnoxious as possible.
and on the other hand, you have your own fun—whenever he shaves you’re always bouncing around him and reaching for his cheeks, eager to feel the silky smooth skin under your palms. and he can only sigh indulgently, making a show out of rolling his eyes dramatically but still taking your palms and pressing them to his jaw.
you laugh and gush over how soft it is and he just shakes his head, lips pulling into a wry smirk as he bends down to let you do whatever you’d like.
“see you’re so soft, toji!” you giggle, smushing his cheeks between your palms and he just scoffs—amused.
“yeah yeah, whatever,” he grunts, making a move to playfully bite at your fingers. “i’ll get y’next time.”
“dare you to try,” you stick your tongue out at him, digging your fingers into his cheeks so that his lips are pouting. you can see the challenge settle into his eyes.
of course, he gets you back later, stubble scraping over your skin as soon as he’s able to.
and funnily enough, he gets so used to it that he starts doing it to the other sweet baby that enters his life.
“oh great,” you laugh, gently smacking his bicep as he presses closer to your body. “at least leave him out of this.”
“impossible,” toji grins, letting his chin brush over chubby fingers. “he needs to learn early.”
little baby megumi squeals from where he’s perched on toji’s chest, arms flapping at the ticklish sensation. you chuckle, reaching out to drag a finger over his chubby cheeks, to which he just babbles.
“learn that you’re a demon?” you ask sarcastically, and toji flashes you a canine smirk. he turns his head to drag his chin over your shoulder, smiling broader at your squeal.
“sure, let’s go with that.”
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on-the-clear-blue · 7 days ago
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Jason felt like he was going insane, there was a flicker just outside of his vision and it was following him...
And it was getting closer and closer each time he noticed it.
A flash of white...a black so dark it sucked in shadows...a chill that left him feeling like he would never be warm again.
He couldn't shake it no matter what he did, his coms went dark an hour ago, and all his tech died not long after, his grappling hook felt heavy in his hand as he ran around another corner, his chest pounding.
God, he needed to get away. He needed to get back to the bats... Batman could help... Bruce always helped...
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Danny couldn't help but hold back a giggle as he saw Red Hood shoot off onto yet another roof top, his whispy tail flicking back and forth as he gave chase! He was having so much fun! Gotham was turning out to be such a fun city!
---
Jason's heart stopped as he saw toxic eyes blink out at him from the shadows, slitted pupils blinked wide into pure black orbs, matching the darkness.
He had faced aliens, new gods, crisis on a scale to erase reality itself but this? He had never felt more afraid.
Fear toxin couldn't even touch this...
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Danny's eyes grew wide like a fiesty feline snorting catnip.
His prey! His pretty and very handsome prey! All the delicious energy pouring off him was intoxicating!
Unknown in his limited brain power, Danny started to match his play partners energy, letting fear roll off him like a tidal wave.
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Time seemed to halt, all hope of losing what was hunting Jason seemed to evaporate.
Forst glazed over the rooftop before jagged unearthly blue ice sprang out of it, spiked and sharp stalagmites jutted out all along Jason, an utter cold that made him forget what warmth felt like.
His hands shook from both fear and from the cold, but they still tightened around his guns, but he couldn't pull the trigger, even as he saw a shimmering outline of something, a shape that was far less monstrous than he had assumed.
---
Danny couldn't help but giggle as he finally caught up with his playmate, floating up to the Reverants face, his small hand wacked right where Hood's nose would be if not for the helmet.
"Boop! Ur It!" He screeched with joy, and started to fly away, snickering as he did, he had yet to loose a game of tag with any of the bats!
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corkinavoid · 2 months ago
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DPxDC John Constantine's How To: Ghost Kids (pt.2)
[<- part 1]
"Oh, yeah," John jerks his head up like he just remembered the fact people are supposed to have names at all. He gestures to the kids, pointing to each of them as he introduces, "Daniel, Daniel, and Danielle."
This time, all three kids flip him off simultaneously. Bruce clears his throat, trying to figure out if Constantine is messing with him and, if so, in which parts. Since, so far, everything the man has said sounds like a poor attempt at pulling his leg.
"I don't think they like those," he cautiously says, and the kids whip their heads at him, nodding furiously. Bruce can't help but be just a little enamored with the way they behave.
"Of, sod off, at this point I don't care what they like," John straightens up with a dismissive, albeit weak, wave of his hands, and rubs his face, "They are menaces. Sometimes by accident, but mostly on purpose. Their grandfather thought it would be easier to handle them if they were not teenagers, and while I agreed with his reasoning at the time, I-" he glances at the kids, who all have displeased grimaces of various levels on their faces, "I have been made to reconsider. I swear that ancient bitch is laughing his ass off wherever he is now."
The kids suddenly grin. They are not very friendly, nor polite smiles - if anything, they look a bit nightmarish. An old grandfather's clock in his study makes a very loud ticking noise.
"See?" John whips his head to look at said clock, the expression on his face bordering on insane. His eye twitches.
If Bruce doesn't do anything now, he might become one of the very few people who managed to witness John Constantine, the Laughing Magician, have a meltdown. So he sighs and decides to solve the problems one at a time.
Which means that no matter how alarmed or suspicious he is, his first move would not be to interrogate either the man or the kids.
"You can sleep in one of the guest rooms, I trust you can find it on your own," he tells John, almost softly, as he catches the girl from slipping away from his lap, "Is there anything I need to know about children before you fall unconscious?"
John slumps with relief, so obviously that Bruce almost smiles. Hardships of raising - or, watching, for that matter - kids, he understands.
"Yes," he breathes out with an air of exhilaration and turns to the kids again, pointing to the middle child, "Danny is the original. He is from this dimension and timeline, that is. Dan," he turns his finger to the older boy, "is in the wrong timeline, he's Danny's future evil self redeemed into older bratty brother. Dani," he switches to the girl, "is Danny's clone, made by his arch-nemesis of a godfather. If she starts melting at any point, wake me up immediately. If any of them start floating, sprouting tentacles, speaking to walls in static, or glowing, don't."
Bruce looks down to the kids. So, definitely metas, that would explain the government trying to get them... Or, no, it wouldn't because he is fairly certain no government is going to blatantly ignore the Meta Protection Acts.
"Don't let them raise the dead, and if you give them food, make sure it doesn't have a face. If you find more than three of them, it means one of them has duplicated, don't worry, they will absorb it back later. Absolutely don't let them touch any guns," Constantine is backing down to the door as he speaks, his gaze flickering from the kids to Bruce and back every second. Like he is leaving a ticking bomb in Bruce's lap, and not three children. "Danny is, comparatively, the most responsible one, the other two are up for any dubious trouble they can get to at any moment. Oh, and their memories are wonky because of de-aging, they remember some things but not others, so if they say something particularly disturbing, it's most likely some random piece of knowledge they managed to keep."
Bruce raises an eyebrow. He did get the part about the kids being, well, abnormal in the matters of their origins, but the disjointed set of rules and advices doesn't help as much as Constantine probably thinks it does.
"Allergies, preferences, ages they were before?" He tries to get at least some more info down before John disappears through the door. Actually, maybe he should send someone to handcuff the man to the bed lest he disappears completely.
"None, but don't let them eat cutlery. Danny likes space, Dani has a thing for exploring, and Dan likes violence." The older kid stirs in Bruce's lap and says something in the direction of Constantine. No sound comes out, but the man seems to get what he's trying to say anyway, "Okay, yes, that was rude of me, sorry. Dan likes... exercise," he ends up with, and that placate the boy enough to slump down and cross his arms. John sighs, "They were seventeen, fourteen, and twenty respectively. Now," he snaps his fingers, and suddenly Bruce can hear the girl - Dani - humming a tune under her breath. So, he lifted the silence spell, it seems.
"Good fucking luck," John wishes to Bruce, earnestly, and all but vanishes away.
Bruce sighs and looks down to the kids.
"Are you hungry?" He tries, and all eyes are on him at once, attentive and unblinking.
"Fruitloops," Danny says, and while Bruce is positive that's the name for a cereal, he gets a feeling that's not what the kid meant.
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