#marius also needs to get a gift for armand so

[desertfangs]

Valenfangs - Day 6 - Heart-Shaped Locket

💘 Just a short, silly little drabble today for the @valenfangs prompt "Heart-Shaped Locket" 💘

“You can’t give Pandora this,” Daniel said, looking at the contents of the shiny gold box on Marius’ dresser. Marius frowned from his chair where he was reading over some emails on his iPad. “What?” “This thing.” Daniel lifted the heart-shaped locket. “It’s too cheesy.” Marius stared at it for a long moment. “You don’t think it’s romantic?” Daniel put it back into the box. “Sure, I do, but I’m a sucker for those kinds of things. Pandora is going to think it’s silly. Maybe if it were shaped like anatomical heart…” “Shall I gift it to you then?” Marius smiled. Daniel laughed. “What about a bracelet? That seems more her style.” “You’re as bad as Armand, trying to play personal shopper for everyone else,” Marius said. “What did you get him anyway?” “A vase dug out of the ruins of Pompeii that’s been restored,” Daniel said. Marius’ face dropped a bit. “That is quite good.” He sighed and stood. “Fine, yes, let’s go shopping. I can fly us to Paris.”

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV Musings - Can vampires LEARN new Dark Gifts?

YES.

And NO.

Three things affect a vamp's Gifts: Time, Blood, & Akasha. ALL vampires have the ability to unlock ALL of the Dark Gifts as they age & drink & get stronger & practice. No one vampire is born with the ability to do things no other vampire can do, that's not how it works. Vampires are superhuman, and preternaturally strong & powerful, even at base level as bb!fledglings. For instance: mere minutes after she was Turned, Lestat's mother Gabrielle was able to shatter glass just with her voice (just as we see AMC!Claudia do); it's basic.

However, some vamps CAN be born naturally more adept at using the Gifts from the offset. Gabrielle's vampiric senses & instincts seemed to be naturally sharper than Lestat's:

And she needed ZERO direction figuring out how to scale walls (anti-gravity)--nothing but sheer youth/age kept her from the Cloud Gift.

A BAMF, AMC!Claudia seems to be teaching herself how to use the Cloud Gift--or at least anti-gravity (OG!Superman could only leap tall buildings in a single bound b4 DC said eff it and let him fly).

Ofc she has the potential for the Cloud Gift already, cuz AMC!Lestat already had it. book!Les didn't learn the Cloud Gift until QotD, after he drank copiously from Akasha. But book!Claudia never stood a chance--book!Les didn't have it yet to pass it down to her.

Another good example's Armand, who is THE best vamp with the Spell & Mind Gifts--a naturally talented savant; a child prodigy.

That's not to say that there aren't other skilled & powerful vamps who're really good at the Mind/Spell Gifts. It's just that from very early on, Armand was uncommonly good at it, and he just honed that talent over time, quicker than other vamps do.

But the Mind Gift is also THE default ability of vampires. Even basic AF young bb!fledglings can use it; and with practice, they can all get good at it--but most don't live long enough to get that good.

But several things CAN hold a vampire back from getting stronger/better with the Dark Gifts--I've explained wtf Rhosh was up to b4.

As bad as Magnus was, he had NOTHING on Rhoshamandes (who deliberately didn't WANT his fledglings to know anything about their Gifts). Magnus was suicidal, and in a hurry to to die, so he told Lestat the barest of bones, but nothing more, then offed himself.

Cuz yes, even BEFORE book!Lestat met Armand & Marius/Akasha, he was ALREADY abnormally gifted (10x stronger than a fledgling his age)--cuz Magnus was old & strong AF thanks to having the blood of old AF Rhoshamandes (via Benedict).

But book!Louis was weak AF, and the WORST with the Mind Gift. AMC!Louis' below average with it, as Armand warned him in 2x2 that he's garbage at blocking his thoughts. But book!Louis couldn't use the Mind Gift AT ALL, he's shockingly bad.

But it's not that book!film!Louis could NEVER be taught how to use the Mind Gift--but Lestat certainly didn't know HOW to teach Louis, or connect with him on a level that could ease Louis into vampirism more considerately. He was a pisspoor teacher for Louis (but not for Claudia, who was more similar to Les & thrived under him--at first).

However, the fact that Lou was habitually starving himself meant he'd stunted his own growth--he CAN'T get stronger/better, cuz his body's too frail by design. Vamps need time, practice, and esp. HUMAN BLOOD, to feed the power within them. book!Lou never did; despite how old he got, it was only once he drank Lestat's super!Akasha!blood in Merrick that he finally unlocked all of the Gifts instantly, in one fell swoop, inc. the Fire Gift. Despite how weak & starved he was, the second Lou got access to Akasha's super!blood thru Les, he was off like a shot. (And I'd bet Monopoly money that if book!Claudia had drunk from Akasha, she'd have every Gift, too.) Speaking of--

Conversely, let's look at Akasha. According to Marius, it took her FOREVER to get the Fire Gift--several millennia. As strong as she was in Egypt, she was still young, and still developing, too. Khayman's Akasha =/=Marius' Akasha =/= Lestat's Akasha. She naturally got stronger & stronger with time.

Back in Egypt, Akasha had to use the Mind Gift (telekinesis) to lift oil lamps that were already lit, and throw them at people.

~500yrs later, Marius saw her kill Eudoxia just by lighting the wench on fire from thin air; with the Fire Gift (pyrokinesis). So it took Akasha thousands of years to acquire the Fire Gift.

But Akasha already had it in her--"lain dormant for centuries." Same as it lay dormant in Marius--he didn't even know he had the Fire Gift, or that it was even a thing--the first time he used it was an accident/surprise, when he was already ~500yrs old & fought Eudoxia's goons.

One could argue that mere time had given Marius the Fire Gift--and his Maker Teskhamen was old AF, strong enough to have survived the Great Burnings, so that was another bonus. BUT! Marius had drunk lots of Akasha's blood MORE RECENTLY than ANY of the Elders did. Her blood was aging while he alone had her, so as Marius drank, he gained access to older/better blood than the Elders before him. He was at the best advantage to get stronger quicker. Marius was better at every Dark Gift than the vampires FAR older than he was (Avicus was just as old as Teskhamen).

With the Killing Gift, Marius could make bodies literally explode. But Avicus, the eldest, could only give them a fatal aneurysm to make their brain bleed out. Mael could only cripple bodies, not kill them.

But the Fire Gift was something ONLY Marius could do, that the other vamps couldn't, younger or older.

Drinking Akasha's blood is vamp steroids, crack, Aim Bot, hax mode, deus ex machina, cutting the line, copying off the smart kid in class. But drinking from old AF vamps can also grant significant boosts. The Children of the Millennia begged book!Lou to take their ancient blood, to help him get strong pre-Merrick; but he always declined. We know from the Tulane drafts that he never drank book!Les' blood, or vice versa. And presumably, he never drank Armand's blood either. (I have reservations/doubts abt whether AMC!Loumand drank e/o's blood, but I'll talk about that in a separate post.) As for Lesmand....

We'll have to wait for S3 to confirm if 2x3 was bullsh!te or not. AMC!Lestat drank Armand blood (and presumably gained the power boost needed to get the Fire/Mind Gifts Armand then taught him to use), but this never happened in the books. book!Les already had the Mind Gift--he was able to read Eleni's mind and know she wanted Renaud's Theatre, which he told her take & run with Nicki. And in QotD Les said he used the Mind Gift "in the first few weeks after Magnus had made me" to telekinetically punch Nicki during one of their fights.

book!Armand drank LES' blood when they fought and Les kicked his arse, but he never drank from Armand in TVL, or asked him about the Mind/Fire Gift. It was Armand's strength that surprised Les--

--mostly cuz Les wondered if he was just as strong as Armand. Les had no idea what his powers were. Cuz barring extreme cases like using the Fire Gift while your life's in danger, vamps don't KNOW the Gifts that are out there, to even know to learn/practice with them--just like Everard said: Rhosh never told the de Landen Coven about the Dark Gifts, and he was 1000+ years old when he learned about them by reading TVL. Knowledge is power, and if you don't even know what your baseline is, how can you ever know your limits/potential?

The most valuable thing book!Armand taught Lestat (and Louis) was information. KNOWLEDGE about the past. NOT about Dark Gifts.

Louis took Armand's word that there was no living vamp older than Armand (proof that God didn't exist), but Lestat took Armand's word that Marius was NOT a fake legend, and went looking for proof on his own.

But AMC!Armand teaches Lestat & Louis VERY important Dark Gifts, which changes their dynamics significantly (I'll make a separate post all about that).

So yeah, I just wanted to think out loud & mull over whether dogs really can learn new tricks or not.

[nalyra-dreaming]

Hey, thanks for answering my previous question. Could you also explain why Claudia wasn’t as powerful? She too was Lestat's blood and unlike Louis she always fed well. And she also drank from Santiago and the rest of the coven. And will Louis eventually get stronger and learn things like the cloud gift once he fully commits to vampirism and drinks from Lestat again?

So for one, Claudia's body is "too small" (at least canonically in the books), she cannot drink "enough" of Lestat's blood to make her truly powerful - or have her "have enough vampiric blood". In the show... that may be debatable, logically seen, given she's already 14, BUT they tried to make that canon there, too, by adding it in that she could not turn those boys she left there "gasping". (It's part of her narration when they confront her in ep5.)

In the book that is more logical, since Claudia's body is that of a small child there.

But there is another factor there as well, namely the sequence of fledglings and the relatively short time between.

Vampire blood "refines" with time, and also if "distilled" by sleeping. But it needs time either way.

Lestat turned Louis, and gave him the blood.

Claudia was turned a mere handful of years later, and rather unplanned, Lestat's blood had not yet become as powerful again.

Claudia was a strong vampire - for her body and for her "timing". She was a powerful predator.

The blood she had taken from the coven, as well as her feeding properly (and regularly) would have, eventually, granted the gifts to her.

Louis also will become stronger, has already become stronger with Armand's blood. But... well, at least canonically the gifts cannot be learned. I know we saw Armand "teaching", but it is more teaching how to trigger it - that can be taught. Akasha, for example, teaches Lestat how to use the cloud gift in the books.

But the "blood ability" of the blood being strong enough to use that gift has to be there first.

For Louis to be able to learn the fire gift at all means that he was, actually, quite strong already.

A lot of vampires only learn the fire gift quite the while later. And the cloud gift is actually quite rare, and limited to the truly old ones - or those who had access to truly powerful blood.

Like Armand, for example - he's been made by Marius, after Marius had not made someone for quite a while. And Marius had drunk from Akasha, often.

Armand is no ancient (though Louis calls him that) - but he has powers that surpass his basic age because of Marius' powerful blood. It was a rule by the Children of Darkness not to make a vampire with such powerful blood, a rule that Magnus, Lestat's maker also broke, for example.

And Lestat could have the cloud gift there because he was older - and had drunk from Akasha.

Hope that explained it a bit :)))

[loustat-0]

Not sure why we need to perpetuate this lie that people think loumand is healthy. Been in this fandom for two years and I’ve never seen anyone say it even once. Maybe that’s how they’re living on Twitter but not here.

1. None of the ships are quite healthy in TVC . Not from what I've read so far . But maybe people mistake Loumand being more understanding and more calm to be less toxic ? That's not how it is to me . Because Armand had so many benefits that Lestat didn't have with Louis . Armand had nothing to hide from Louis , Armand wasn't threatened by Marius to be destroyed if he said anything about their kind and their origins , Marius literally told Lestat to go live like a human and gave him sets of rules and told him if he breaks them he would definitely find him and kill his fledglings and himself . And more importantly ARMAND COULD READ LOUIS'S MIND . Of course he knew what Louis wanted to give it to him . Of course there was no dark gift between them so that Louis hates him too of course Louis believed Armand wasn't withholding anything until Madeline of course . And then Claudia and the fact that he never told Louis he imprisoned Lestat to get him to confess against Claudia . But again Armand wanted to save Louis and separate Lestat from him and he would do anything to make that happen .

2. Armand seems less toxic because he doesn't have those limits that Lestat had . Why do you think Armand was so opposite of turning Daniel ?? Because he knew once the dark gift is shared between them their love will disappear and it will make them resent each other or at least it will make Daniel resent him . And it actually did happen unfortunately , they fell apart after QOTD till prince Lestat . So the dark gift is such an important aspect that Armand and Louis are free of . And that's to their benefit . People say Armand was also a good listener to Louis yes I agree but Lestat became a good listener too if Louis's words weren't always triggering him . Louis always triggered him . It's also the same on the show , we saw Lestat talk a lot but he also listened too . Unless Louis was triggering him with something he hated to talk about which is also understandable .

3. Now I don't know how the show will handle Loumand but I hope they keep these factors in mind but even if they didn't we can't do much about it 😉

[hekateinhell]

Can Armand fly? Like does he have the ~Cloud Gift~ so to speak, or does he not? I can’t remember..

And he doesn’t seem to have/use the Fire Gift too right, or am I wrong?

Armand’s powers are so interesting to me, the way he can make life like illusions like no other (at least I can’t remember an Anne Rice vampire making that kind of illusions, maybe I’m wrong) is somehow so ‘compliant’ with his character.

I remember when Daniel is about to be turned, Armand creates this illusion for him and Daniel’s description is so haunting for some reason, like he can actually smell the flowers, he can see the stars, he can pick a leaf from a tree and he even sees Armand’s damp footprints on the ground(!) Imagine being able to conjure up an illusion like that.. jeez

And he seems to have been able to do it when he was a younger vampire too, right?

Like didn’t he draw mortals who were ready to die from their homes with some kind of illusion, so he could feed on them? (That is also so compliant with his character for some reason now I think about it)

God, he really is SUCH a good character I can’t get over him. I need to have his name tattooed on my body (like Armand definitely tried to convince Daniel to do. ‘Daniel, can’t you get this tattoo of my name on your arm? I want to see how it is done :3’)

Armand does have the Cloud Gift!

The very first mention of Armand being able to fly is in MtD, where Lestat seems rather surprised to realize that he can:

The steel buttons of his [Armand's] denim jacket were icy cold, as though he had come from some far worse winter in a very few moments of time. We are never entirely sure about each other's powers. It's all a game. I would no more have asked him how he got here, or in what manner, than I would ask a mortal man how precisely he made love to his wife. ~ Lestat, MtD

Unrelated but I'm always so thirsty for any insights as to how vampires view their relationships to each other within vampiric norms, and I think it's fascinating that even two vampires who've known each other for so long and have such a complex, intertwined history as Armand and Lestat do don't really know how powerful the other is and it would be taboo to ask. Scandalous!

Thank you to @thecactifindahome for reminding me that Armand actually has known how to fly for quite a while!

By my own will, and with the first explosion of my blood in the light of the morning sun, I had been driven upwards, as high perhaps as I could go. For centuries I'd known how to climb to airy heights and how to move there, but I'd never pushed it to a conceivable limit, but with my zeal for death, I had strained with all my available strength to move Heavenward. My fall had been from the greatest height. ~ Armand, TVA

Armand also has the Fire Gift, which is first noted in PL:

“You go to New York, my friend, and Armand will burn you to cinders,” said Killer. “Oh, not Benji or Sybelle, no, and maybe not even Louis ... but Armand will do it and they won’t bat an eye. And they can do it too. They have Marius’s blood in their veins, those two. Even Louis’s powerful now, got the blood of the older ones in him. But Armand is the one who kills. There are eight million people in Manhattan and four members of the Undead. I warn you, Antoine, they won’t listen to you. They won’t care that Lestat made you. Least I don’t think they will. Hell, you won’t even have a chance to tell them. Armand will hear you coming. Then he’ll kill you on sight. You do know they have to see you to burn you up, don’t you? They can’t do it unless they can see you. But Armand will hunt you down and you won’t be able to hide.” ~ Killer to Antoine, PL

Armand has always been incredibly powerful — even a newborn vampire — which I think is due to a few different factors:

Marius ensured that Armand received plenty of his blood during his turning

Prior to making Armand, Marius hadn't created another vampire since Pandora, some 1,500 years ago so the power in his blood was very potent

Marius's blood was so powerful to begin because of the regular infusions he received from Akasha, so the vampires in his line do tend to be powerful and gifted

This accounts for Armand's early strength and Mind Gift abilities (spellbinding and illusions).

Seeing as the Cloud Gift didn't come until after QotD, I headcanon Armand received a blood power-up from Marius (or perhaps another of the old ones, similar to how Maharet offered Louis her blood). Vampire powers evolve with time/age, surviving a burning, taking the blood of a much more powerful vampire.

Age gave him the Cloud Gift, and following his suicide attempt, Armand did drink from Lestat — so the combination of the burning and Lestat's blood likely contributed to him developing the Fire Gift soon afterwards.

Armand is also telekinetic:

I have most-powerful abilities to cast spells, to dislocate my vision, and to transmit my image over distances, and to affect matter both at close range and matter which is out of sight. ~ Armand, TVA

And last but not least, he may have the power to astral project although I don't believe it's explicitly spelled out but even as a mortal, he has an out of body experience witnessing himself dying, and later on when he's recounting his suicide attempt in TVA, he says this:

That is, having fallen on the roof, burnt and in unspeakable torment, I might have sought a desperate mental escape, projecting my image and my strength into Sybelle's apartment long enough to kill her brother. It certainly is possible for spirits to exert enough pressure on matter to change it. So perhaps that is exactly what I did-project myself in spirit form and lay hands upon the substance that was Fox, and kill him.

However, he doesn't actually believe that that's what happened in this particular instance, but it's the possibility that he is, in fact, powerful enough to do so. Armand was already so unique and "different" as a mortal child and adolescent (I would call this neurodivergent but that wasn't a term in the 15th century or anytime shortly after), that it makes sense his powers would be easily amplified and exceptional in their own right.

Re: his hunting style, it's described by Lestat when they first meet as:

He [Armand] had learned to summon those who truly wished to die. He had but to stand near the dwellings of mortals and call silently to see his victim appear. Old, young, wretched, diseased, the ugly or the beautiful, it did not matter because he did not choose. Dazzling visions he gave, if they should want to receive, but he did not move towards them nor even close his arms around them. Drawn inexorably towards him, it was they who embraced him. And when their warm living flesh touched him, when he opened his lips and felt the blood spill, he knew the only surcease from misery that he could know. It seemed to him in the best of these moments that his way was profoundly spiritual, uncontaminated by the appetites and confusions that made up the world, despite the carnal rapture of the kill. In that act the spiritual and the carnal came together, and it was the spiritual, he was convinced, that survived. Holy Communion it seemed to him, the Blood of the Children of Christ serving only to bring the essence of life itself into his understanding for the split second in which death occurred. ~ Lestat, TVL

Definitely within character, I agree :') for a character that to me reads as having been passively suicidal for most of his life, there is a bittersweet irony and perhaps even a misguided sense of mercy behind it.

AND YES YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY GET AN ARMAND TATTOO I WANT ONE SO BAD!!! character of all time, love of my life, etc etc you guys already know!!!!!

[ravennawritesfanfiction]

Beauty From Darkness Part 4

Words: 4733

Pairings: Armand x Reader, Louis x Lestat still in denial, Gabrielle x Marius?

Summary: Armand and Reader are moving to a new life together and Armand hatches a plan that would be the finishing touches on the perfect life.

Everyone in the vampire quintet made the most of this opportunity. Gabrielle and Marius could not have been happier. It had been months and no one had slipped back into old habits. And although they acted as mom and dad to the group, they made a point of being there, but leaving everyone alone to do what they all needed to do. They were there to help but the guidance came from one another. 

You and Armand had moved to Los Angeles together so you could be closer to your new record label. Although you had decided you decided to be companions half way through your tour, this was the first time that you were living together. It was perfect. Armand was thrilled that you wouldn’t have to travel for work outside of tours anymore. You were both glad to have the other around now. You were also thrilled to be closer to Daniel. 

Together, you and Armand had kept your promise to Daniel to be there for him. It hadn’t taken long for the vampires of the world, the ones who were already threatening Louis, to realize that Daniel was also a vampire. The threats began and Daniel couldn’t really be bothered to give a shit about words. Then attacks began. The first had been orchestrated by a couple young fledglings trying to make names for themselves. Daniel was uninjured by the exchange, but it was enough for you and Armand to decide he needed to develop his gifts. 

He had vaguely figured out how to read minds on his own, though the skill was unrefined at best. Luckily, he knew the basics and he was an eager student. By your suggestion, Armand worked to strengthen his mind gifts first. Daniel was a natural. After he’d figured out telepathy in all its wonders, it didn’t take him long to figure out pyrokinesis. He was trained to fight physically, though you didn’t think it was necessary since he had lit Armand’s sleeve on fire out of lingering spite. You really didn’t think an attack on him would have a chance to get physical. 

You fell into a rhythm after that. You left Daniel and returned to your life in a new city. Armand made it his personal project to make your home absolutely perfect and he spared no expense. The entire house was remodeled. Your kitchen, which became a bit of a joke amongst vampires, was absolutely amazing. Louis stated that Gordon Ramsey would be jealous. The master bedroom was gutted and enlarged; Armand incorporated a sitting area around a fireplace, designed massive walk in his and hers closets. The en suite bathroom had both a walk in shower that doubled as a sauna as well as a bathtub that doubled as a jacuzzi. One of the several guest bedrooms was converted into a gigantic library that you knew Belle would have died for. The guest rooms were also given a revision and honestly you were worried that once someone visited, they wouldn’t leave. He had built you a castle.

Gabrielle and Marius moved to Los Angeles a little while after you had gotten situated. They claimed it was because they were part of your team so it made sense for them to follow you; you and Armand suspected they just wanted to be closer to the group. During a conversation with Gabrielle one night while you and Marius were off working, it was decided that Armand had come a long way towards giving you the perfect life. A thought began gnawing at his brain; your thoughts on what a perfect life would look like. By human standards, you were probably viewed as live-in boyfriend/girlfriend. Gabrielle was eyeing him suspiciously; seeing snippets of his thoughts. 

“She has loved you for over two hundred years,” Gabrielle stated more or less to herself.

Armand looked to Gabrielle, fully catching her meaning. He knew that your biggest dream before had been to get married, but you often regarded it as a human fantasy now when the subject was brought up, though he knew you didn’t believe your own words.  He was still at Gabrielle and Marius’ house when Marius returned, you must have gone home since you weren’t with him. He looked at the two and began working on his biggest plot yet. He was going to marry you. Both of the vampires quickly agreed to help.

You knew something was off as soon as he got home. His mind, which you always had full access to, was shut off. He was no less attentive to you, but you knew there was something he was hiding. This continued for weeks. He was never home when you got home from work and when he did get home, he was exhausted. You called Louis up and told him what was going on, but Louis didn’t know of anything happening that would make Armand, the vampire that was mad about you, act so weird. He tried to be supportive and convince you maybe it wasn’t something awful, but you could hear the underlying anger in his voice. That day when Armand got home, you were informed that he was throwing a party in a few weeks and that Gabrielle would be stopping by to help him. You were not excited.

Boxes were delivered full of things that Armand would not let you see. Stacks of chairs he gave no explanation for. The entire ballroom was listed as off limits to you until further notice. You were upset, he could see it, but once Gabrielle made the final move, he hoped you would figure it out enough to enjoy it; maybe you’d even be excited.

Marius left town for “work”, but since he worked for you, the excuse was thin. He wouldn’t tell you where he was going and by the time Louis and Lestat arrived, you were a wreck. You had promised each other no secrets and no lies. Now Armand was keeping secrets and lying by omission; he even had Marius in on it. 

Gabrielle arrived the next day with a team of decorators that she unleashed on the ballroom. Clearly, she was also in on it. She threw clothes at you, a sign that she expected you to get up and get dressed. She did your hair and makeup in a way that didn’t scream shopping trip, it screamed prom or photoshoot. Once satisfied, she dragged you out of the house, Lestat and Louis watching you next to Armand, who looked sad and excited. Gabrielle would not tell you where you were going. 

You arrived in front of a bridal shop that looked big enough to house every dress in the world inside. You were beyond confused. The only communication you got was from Gabrielle who instructed you to find your dream dress. You decide that she is a steel trap and it would probably be best and less painful to just listen and do as she told you. You tried calling to Armand, but he wouldn’t answer you despite the fact you could feel him there. 

While you’re gone, Louis and Lestat take the opportunity to find out exactly what was going on. Armand doubts that either of them would be able to keep this from you, but seeing Louis getting progressively more pissed off, he decides that it would be wise to just tell them and hope for the best. 

“I am prefacing this with that fact that I know we are vampires,” Armand began from his spot on the couch, he put his head in his hands before looking back up at Lestat and Louis. They both knew he was about to say something incredibly human. “(Y/N)’s dream was to get married. We all know how it worked out for her in the past, we aren’t here to rehash it, but I wanted to give her the wedding that she always dreamed of. I know she’s already my companion, but I really want this experience for her.” Louis couldn’t hold onto his anger after that. That was the single sweetest thing he had ever heard. 

“And you’ve seen heredream wedding before?” Louis asked, unsure how he could know what she wanted otherwise.

“She pictures it often. Gabrielle and Marius are also helping me by adding the things they know about her as well. Marius is actually on an errand for me, but he should be back anytime.” Armand looked between the men sitting with him. He knew what he wanted to do, but doubted they’d do anything for him, he asked anyway. “Louis, I was hoping that you could stand with her as her Man of Honor?” Louis didn’t hesitate, he agreed before the question even left the air.

“Who will be your best man?” Louis questioned.

“Daniel has agreed to do it, but I’m certain that that is for her rather than for me.” Armand was surprised that anyone would ask about him.

“May I ask a question?” this was the first Lestat had said anything since Armand announced he was marrying you. Armand nodded for him to go ahead. “Do you have anyone walking her down the aisle?” Armand pondered this for a moment, an oversight on his part. “No, would you do it, Lestat? I think it would mean a great deal to her.” Lestat nodded. He was going to ask to do it, so of course he would when asked. 

“Where is she now?” Lestat asked.

“Gabrielle took her to get her wedding dress.” Louis stood up and departed, stopping at the door only to announce that as the Man of Honor, he wanted to be there for the dress shopping. Lestat rolled his eyes at Louis. 

“Too bad you killed Madeleine, she could have made the dress exactly as (Y/N) had always envisioned it.” Lestat passive aggressively stated while watching the fireplace. They may get along, but that didn’t mean all was forgiven. 

Louis surprised you and Gabrielle by arriving at the shop. His mind was blank to you as well, though he looked like the cat that ate the canary. He sat with Gabrielle as you tried on a hand full of dresses, though you didn’t seem overly enthused about any of them. You wore them all well, they looked great, but you clearly weren’t in love.

“What are you looking for in a dress?” Louis asked her, trying to figure out exactly what she was looking for that might give her that spark that all of these dresses had failed to provide.

“I don’t know. I always imagined a ballgown with a corset back and lace, but now I don’t know.” Louis stood and disappeared into the endless rows of dresses searching for anything that resembled the image he had seen when you were describing it to him. He found three dresses. One was lace and appeared very dated to him, but you were two hundred and sixty-four so who cares. The other two were ball gowns with the corset back, but lacked lace. He lowkey liked these two better, but it was your wedding so he said nothing when he returned with the dresses to present to you.

You went back to the dressing room where you were helped into the first dress Louis had picked out. You loved it more than anything that had been picked out so far. It was a nice fit, more in line with your vision, but still didn’t do it for you. You went out to show Louis and Gabrielle.

“How do you feel about this one?” Louis asked after making you do a spin.

“It’s more in line with what I wanted, but I don’t think this is the one.” Louis nodded his agreement. The dress was stunning, but it wasn’t it.

Next you tried the lace dress. When you put it on, you realized you hated the feeling of the lace. You loved the look of it but the thought of putting it on made you cringe. You tried it on for Louis to see anyways, though you clearly hated it the whole time. Louis hated it more. You ran back to get it off as quickly as possible.

The last dress almost made you cry when you saw it. You got into it and lit up. When Louis and Gabrielle saw it, they both looked at each other and nodded. It was perfect. That was your dress. Gabrielle set out to find you shoes and accessories while you just kept staring at the mirror. Louis was grinning behind you. 

She paid for it all before retuning back to you; she hadn’t put the card away completely and you caught sight of the name. Armand. You watched her in the reflection as she looked at you in the dress. You broke through the wall and saw the late nights with Armand and Marius planning everything. You saw Armand asking Louis to be your Man of Honor. 

“I won’t let on that I know.” you said as you pulled them into a hug. 

“Let’s make this your dream night, Ma Fille.” Gabrielle relied back from within the group hug.

You changed out of your dress and made your way back home. When you arrived, everything was suspiciously normal. Lestat was sipping a brandy with Armand and Marius in the living room. Gabrielle had taken your dress up stairs. You curled up next to Armand and watched the flames as everyone sat quietly together. 

“Shopping successful?” Armand casually asked.

“I was certainly something.” You offered. You knew that he would stay out of your head to avoid seeing the dress. 

The quiet resumed until Lestat decided that he was getting tired. Louis left with him since both of them were sharing a room due to the volume of guests. Daniel had just arrived and went straight to his room as to not tip you off. Marius and Gabriell retired to their rooms leaving you and Armand alone.

“Perhaps we should retire as well?” You agreed, already winding down from the eventful day you’d had.

Armand led you to your room and lit the fireplace. You sat on the sofa and watched the flames dance until you noticed that Armand was gathering a few things up. When you looked, he had a garment bag, shoes and other things he would need to get ready for the party, but he was gathering them up as if to take them somewhere. You were so confused.

Then he went back into the closet and returned with something behind his back.You watched him out of the corner of your eye as he looked at you smiling. You turned to look at him and your heart melted at the look on his face. He was thinking about how the flames danced off your face. It was the most beautiful sight he’d ever seen. 

“Did you know that your family had a vault?” he asked, breaking the silence of the moment. You were unsure what to say.

“My family? No, I didn’t know about it.” you were confused where this was going, seemingly a trend lately.

“They did. It was in your home, which still stands today. The vault had remained untouched for over two hundred years until a few days ago when Marius went looking for it for me.” he stated matter of factly. “You see there was something in there that I needed to make this absolutely perfect.” he approached you, hands still behind his back.

“I really needed this to be perfect, and this was the missing piece.” He knelt down in front of you on one knee. “You are my everything. I love you more than you will ever know. You make eternity sound not long enough. You are my world. Will you do me the honor of not only being my companion, but of being my wife?” he pulled out a ring you would have known anywhere. The ring that had been your mother’s, grandmother and great grandmother’s wedding rings. The ring that was over four hundred years old and shined before you like it was brand new. The ring. The man presenting it to you. Everything was perfect.

“You already have me, My Love. Yes!” you launched yourself into his arms. You wanted to stay in his arms all night, but after a while of staying curled up on the couch, he stood and gathered his things.

“Where are you going?” you asked as he came over to give you a kiss.

“The groom isn’t supposed to see the bride on her wedding night. I’ll be right next door. Gabrielle will be around to help you get ready. I love you.” you gave him another kiss, hands tangling in his hair. His hands were full or you're pretty sure he would have stayed with you right then and there. 

Bright and early by vampire standards, Gabrielle rushed in and shuffled you off to the bathroom where everything had been laid out to get you ready. She did your hair and make up, and after what felt like hours, she was finally pleased with her handy work. She moved to getting you into your dress. You were a picture of pure beauty. She was teary-eyed looking at you.

“Such beauty. My son is an idiot.” she smiled at you, “but Armand is one lucky man, Ma Fille.” as if summoned, Lestat knocked and entered. He looked handsome in his tuxedo.

“You look like a dream.” he smiled. “Everyone is ready when she is.” he informed Gabrielle. It was unsure if he had heard her comment about him being an idiot, but you got the feeling that he had. And that he probably agreed. 

“I’m ready.” With that, Gabrielle did something she never imagined doing, she left you in Lestat’s care and made her way to the ballroom where her next task began. 

“I hope you don’t mind that I am walking you down the aisle?” Lestat stated as he offered you his arm to escort you to your future.

“I’m glad it’s you, Lestat.” It was the perfect closure. One horrible wedding being replaced by what you already knew was going to be your dream. 

Two doors separated you from your groom, the love of your life. You were already tearing up at the thought of him standing at the altar, waiting for his forever to walk down the aisle. The doors opened and the guests were all on their feet. Playing in the background was the song you had composed in Paris in 1805, the song of you and Armand. It was the perfect touch.

When you saw Armand standing there waiting for you, it took everything you had not to run to him. Lestat’s timed steps keeping you calm and composed. You walked past the faces of people you knew, all smiling back at you with pure joy.

Lestat stopped at the end of the aisle and placed your hand in Armand’s. Before taking his seat next to Gabrielle. You ascended the altar together and took your places with Daniel and Louis before Marius. Turning to face Armand, you got lost in his eyes. Those honey eyes that held forever. 

“It’s not everyday that you get to celebrate a love as profound as the one Armand and (Y/N) have for one another.” Marius began. “It’s the kind of love that forgives and understands. That makes you want to be better for the other. Love that transcends time and distance to find its way back. I asked Armand what he loved most about (Y/N) one day; he told me she’s his home.” Armand was beaming at you.

“I asked (Y/N) the same question and she replied that Armand is her joy, her happiness, he is her other half.” Marius paused before continuing on; he was smiling like a proud father. “I have known both of them for a very long time. I knew each of them before meeting each other and after. I can tell you with absolute certainty, they are better together.” He smiled at his fledglings. 

“I won’t bore everyone with the bit about sickness and health and death do us part. I think Armand and (Y/N) might be past all that,” he laughed at his own joke. “I think I will let them speak.” 

“I knew in Paris that you were a home for my heart. Everynight with you felt like a dream and I didn’t want to wake up. Your absence was worse than death and I missed you immensely. I felt that I was just a shell of myself without you. Finding you again was a miracle that I’m sure many would say I didn’t deserve, but I thank the universe that it decided to give you back to me. You are my whole world. You are my very reason for living. You have made me a better man and I will love you until the end of time.” You mouthed I love you before it was your turn to speak. 

“I once said that you are my best friend and my companion on all the late nights, but you have always been so much more. I believe that Marius made us so that we would one day find each other. You are my other half, my joy, my happiness. Without you, the stars don’t shine as bright and music is just sound. Eternal life loses all meaning. I will forever love you more.” you wiped your eyes as Marius continued. Daniel handed something to Armand. 

“Since this isn’t your normal wedding, I think I speak for everyone when I say keep any objections to yourself, unless of course you want to be on the menu for the happy couple,” Marius was having entirely too much fun getting to speak. 

“Armand, do you take (Y/N) to be your companion for all nights until the end of time?” Armand presented the ring that Daniel had handed him and slipped it on your finger. 

“I do.” He had tears in his eyes now. 

“(Y/N), do you take Armand to be your companion for all nights until the end of time?” Marius turned his gaze to you.

“I do.” Neither of you could look away from the other. You were so overcome with happiness you could barely wait for Marius to announce that you could kiss him.

“By the power vested to me by me, I now pronounce you Vampires Armand and (Y/N), companions for eternity and Husband and Wife. You may now get to the fun part and kiss the bride.” With that, you shared the sweetest most loving kiss that no one could stop. The audience erupted into cheers.

Once Lestat started playing and you made your way back down the aisle arm in arm with Armand. It was absolutely perfect. And even better still, Gabrielle had a wedding photographer capturing every moment. They set up for the classic wedding photos while the ballroom was rearranged to hold the reception. You were having the time of your life. Armand, Louis, Lestat, and Daniel posed with Marius. You and Gabrielle posed together in a few. There were several group shots too. You decided that you would have a massive one printed for over the living room fireplace. 

The reception itself was a grand affair and was everything you had always imagined it would be. Your first dance with Armand felt like the only place you ever wanted to be. His arms were your home. And you never wanted the dance to end. Eventually it did and Daniel stole you away from Armand to spin you around the dancefloor himself. Marius stole you from Daniel for a waltz that was so well executed that you were really showing your ages. Louis stole you away when the jazz began and he had you laughing your way around the dancefloor. You had never felt more love in any place as you did right then. Eventually, Lestat cut in.

“Is it all you dreamed it would be?” he asked, spinning you.

“So much more.” you corrected as he dipped you.

“Thank you, (Y/N). For letting me share this with you.” Lestat rejoined Louis before you could respond. 

Love was in the air. Lestat and Louis were inseparable despite claims that they were not together. Everyone was quick to notice that neither one corrected anyone when they were referred to as companions. Marius and Gabrielle were getting mighty close and everyone in the quintet was secretly hoping that something would come of it. 

At daybreak, everyone retired to their rooms. You and Armand fought what he had coined “the narcoleptic pull of the sun” and spent the day doing what newlyweds do. From the sounds coming from Louis and Lestat’s room, it sounded like you weren’t the only ones. Eventually, you let sleep win in a tangle of limbs. You woke up late that night and decided that you wanted to go for a swim. You had the pool to yourselves. You wrapped your arms around Armand’s neck, foreheads pressed together.

“Everything was perfect, my love. Thank you.” You smiled into his neck. 

“Anything for you.” he kissed you. You stayed in the pool until the sky began to lighten. 

The next day, everyone left to return to their own homes. The party was over and you had a trip planned for you. Armand hauled you to the airport and took you back to the beginning. Paris. You visited the Louvre and all of the oldest streets in Paris. The same ones you walked down in the 1800s. You visited the tunnels that once led to Theatre des Vampires. 

After Paris, you went on to Auvergne. The castle looked much the same as it had when you had lived there. It was your understanding that some faction of the de Lioncourt family still resided there. The family cemetery had grown over the years. You found the one the Marquis had put up for Gabrielle when it was obvious that she would die on her travels that led her to the Vampire Lestat. There was a headstone for Lestat when news traveled from Nicolas that he had disappeared in the middle of the night and had been assumed dead. And lastly, there was a headstone for you, your heart breaks. “(Y/N) de Lioncourt, Lost but not forgotten.” Armand pulled you close. Something about the fakeness of that family irked him. How could they love you so much in death, but let you suffer in life. You didn’t stay there past the cursory examination of the grounds. 

Your last stop was at your very beginning. Your family home. Armand had stopped at the town hall and pulled records for the home. It had been standing empty since 1787, the year you died; also the year your mother reportedly died as well. When you arrived, nothing had really changed. The grounds were overgrown, but that was about it.  

You ventured into the house to discover that all of your belongings were still there. The family portrait about the fireplace was faded but still clear enough to see those forever captured on the canvas. The bedrooms were all exactly as they had been left. Your books you had been forced to leave when you left for Auvergne were still on the shelf, albeit not in the same condition. Your dresses still hung in the closet, years of moths not doing them any favors. Armand found the journal that had been left in your nightstand. You didn’t care that he was reading it. None of the thoughts trapped on those pages mattered much. 

“January 1, 1775, Dear Diary, Mother and Father are acting strangely as this new year begins. Even still, one thought follows me; I hope that I will get to marry the man of my dreams. Let him be strong and intelligent, kind and compassionate. I hope I can see the stars in his eyes. “ he read aloud.

“249 years later, Dear Diary, we did it. It was a long road full of loneliness and heartbreak. We never thought we would live to see the day, but he saved us. He’s strong, smart, and caring with honey eyes. And we are forever surrounded by stars. I love him completely.” You wrote back. 

[zkaus]

Why do you think this interview is happening?

As the entire Dubai storyline is new, we just don't know where it's all heading, but I'm utterly fascinated!!

There are so many amazing theories! I've summarised my favs below:

THEORY 1: - The interview is for Armand/Daniel

This theory argues that Armand and Daniel's relationship will mirror the books. In the books, Armand was obsessed with Daniel (stalked him for years), then they were a couple for 8 years before Armand turned him. Armand desperately didn't want to, but Daniel was dying (substance abuse) - it was turn him or lose him.

This theory suggests that in the show Armand wiped Daniel's memories years ago, but still loves him. He has been tracking him closely, and upon finding out that he's dying, he freaks out.

He can't stand losing him, so, he has Louis repeat the interview (to reproduce the process that originally brought Daniel to him). He pretended to be human so Daniel had the opportunity to connect with him as an equal, a proper companion (like how Lestat hid his Cloud Gift from Louis).

THEORY 2: - General Vampire Unrest

This theory argues that there is unrest in the Vampire world and that the interview is about provoking Lestat into finding them. This suggests that Dubai storyline takes place either before 'Prince Lestat' or 'The Vampire Lestat', and that they are trying to get him to come to Dubai to help them sort out the unrest (as in the beginning of 'Prince Lestat'). Basically, Daniel's book is like Benji's radio station, begging Lestat to come to them.

THEORY 3: - 'The Groan' is Those Who Must Be Kept

This theory argues that 'The Groan' we hear many times throughout the Dubai scenes is Those Who Must Be Kept waking up. That's a HUGE problem because they would enslave the human and vampire races. (Possibly, the apartment in Dubai is Marius's house - It is his painting is on the wall).

They need Lestat's help to pacify/deal with them, so the interview is a way to get his attention. Also, we know Lestat has already met them before (he mentions this in episode 6) so it's canon that he knows them.

THEORY 4 :- 'The Groan' is Lestat

This theory argues that the show takes place after Memnoch and that it's Lestat groaning in despair. This supposes that (some of) the events of TVL, QOTD and ToTBT have already happened. At this point in the books, Lestat is semi-catatonic, but wakes up to save Louis when he attempts suicide. Earlier, he also helps Armand by culling a huge amount of vampires which were threatening the safety of the city. As Armand says in the show, the interview is basically a suicide note. So, this interview could be about getting Lestat to wake up by provoking the rest of the Vampires to try killing Louis.

THEORY 5a:- The Interview is for Louis

This theory supposes that Louis is a captive/prisoner of Armand, and that he is pretending to love him, but actually wants to escape. It argues that Louis is planning to publish IWTV to provoke Lestat into action and save him from Armand (and the vampires who would try to kill him). This one suggests that Armand loves Louis and is controlling/passifying him to 'protect' him from himself.

This theory also suggests that Armand is behaving like a caregiver, and allowing Louis to do the interview as a form of therapy. But that he has no intention of allowing Daniel to actually publish it (as he knows it's a death sentence for Louis).

THEORY 5b:- The interview is for Lestat

This theory is similar to the one above, except that it proposes that Armand will allow the book to be published. This is to provoke Lestat to come to them (either so Armand can kill him or because he is in love with Lestat too). And that he is pretending to be human both to avoid being mentioned in the book Daniel will publish, and to manipulate/control what Daniel will write about his past (the Theatre of the Vampires etc).

And that's just the start! There are so, so, so many more. And so many unanswered questions. I can't wait till season 2, to find out!

Personally, I think it's a combination of several (1, 3 and 5b).

Which do you think is most likely?

Do you have a different theory?

Anything to add?

.

[monstersinthecosmos]

LMAO THANKS FOR RIPPING MY HEART OUT WITH THE POST ABOUT WHAT A BLIP IN TIME VENICE ERA ACTUALLY WAS I GUESS?!?! im at workkkk i cant deal with this!!!!! ! 😫😫😫 WELL EVEN SO, how do you think armand views/deals with this difference in how formative those yrs were for him vs what they meant to marius? they were extremely significant for both of them but i feel like for very distinct reasons / in very distinct ways.... 😭!

i think he deals with it exactly like this:

✨ I fear him. I don't know why. Perhaps I fear him because I could love him again, and loving him, I would come to need him, and needing him, I would come to learn from him, and learning from him, I would be again his faithful pupil in all things, only to discover that his patience for me is no substitute for the passion which long ago blazed in his eyes. ✨

I feel like there's a huge fucking mother wound maker wound going on with Armand and I think a LOT of his behavior can be tracked to his abandonment issues. Making himself useful to people or trying to Spell Gift manipulate people into loving him back, or seeing a version of him that he wants them to see, etc.

Making a fledgling is his biggest fear and he sees it as a curse! He knows that once you turn them, they stop seeing you as special, you can never communicate the same way, and you lose your lustre, you become boring to them, there is no substitute for the passion which long ago blazed in their eyes!!

I'm gonna die on the hill defending why Marius didn't rescue Armand -- I GET IT -- but Armand doesn't know any of that. All he knows is that his Maker never rescued him. Even when he was out of the cult, running the TDV, easily track-downable, Marius never came to him.

In the way I think Marius declined to rescue Armand for fear of rejection, Armand also can't bridge this gap back to Marius for a fear of rejection. He wants it! He wants what they had! But he knows they're too different now and it's never going to be the way it was, and they both have to do a lot of work to build a new relationship that could work for who they each are now.

But to answer your question I think it probably just really compounds the feelings of inferiority and the fear that he doesn't deserve love! 🤗

[apoptoses]

♡ + Armand/Marius?

It took me a minute to answer these because I wanted to answer in detail. And they’re sweet questions, so here’s some sweet answers ♥

•Who’s the most affectionate?

In Venice? Armand. It's a wonder Marius ever got anything done with him slinking around, always trying to sneak a cuddle or a kiss. He was like the cat that manages to work its way into your lap no matter how much you twist around and try to put your laptop in the way. Marius could hunch over his desk with his journal and Armand would still find a way to drape himself over his back until he could no longer be ignored.

Modern day? Marius. The man's got some making up to do and it's high time Armand get pursued.

•Who initiates the handholding?

At home it's 50/50. In public I always picture Armand as someone who holds onto his partner's elbow, which is a suitably dignified level of PDA for Marius and also means if Armand is in a mood he can subtly drag him around by the arm with no one the wiser about who's leading who.

•Who worries more for the other?

Marius absolutely worries himself into knots about Armand, he just has such a difficult time showing it. I don't believe that a single day went by in between the kidnapping and the reunion in QotD that he wasn't worrying. It was just that he pushed those thoughts down inside himself and tried to bury them.

•Who is more likely to ask for help?

Unless the threat of death is imminent? Neither of them. Though in a less serious way, I see Armand using needing 'help' as a bid for attention 'Help me open this jar', 'help me wash my back', 'help me get dressed'. With all of those laces on 15th century clothes? You better believe Armand pestered Marius to 'help' him tie up his hose and in doing so got what he really wanted, and ended up stripped out of them.

•Who is the one always losing the keys?

God, both of them. They both have tendencies to collect stuff and hyperfocus, and we all know what that does to a person when it comes to keeping track of little items. Thank god for their immortal gifts rendering keys unnecessary.

•Who leaves little love notes for the other?

I like to think that Marius, upon learning how his fatalistic commentary in his journal wounded Armand, decided to correct course by writing kind things about him and leaving them around where he knew Armand could see. Maybe apologizing in words is difficult, but leaving his journal open to a page where he describes Armand's lovely eyes? That's not so hard at all.

•Who can’t sleep unless the other is there?

Armand. As a mortal his body just knew when Marius had left, and he would jerk out of his sleep and find the bed empty. It would take him ages to fall back asleep, tossing and turning the whole time. Perhaps on that very first night of immortality he climbed willingly into his own coffin. But after that? Just before sunrise he would sneak back out and open the coffin beside his, and climb in beside Marius to let sleep take them both.

•Who is more likely to propose to the other?

I'm not sure they're the proposing type- they both have so many other relationships. But I totally see Armand remembering the diamond ring Marius gave him, the one he described as having the white light of god. And once they've properly made up and smoothed things out between them for good he would seek out a similar matching set so that Marius, like his other loves, has a ring with a gemstone that goes with one of his.

•Who introduced the other to their family first?

Well, we have this answer in canon, don't we? I wonder though, if Armand wishes that instead of standing in the shadows Marius would have spoken to his family with him. He got to see them all for one last time but they never knew who the man with him was. He never could have told them the full details of their relationship, of course- but it's bittersweet that Marius was right there the whole time watching them.

•Who is more likely to play with the other’s hair?

Oh, it's 50/50. Armand had the nicest perfumed hair in Venice from Marius taking him into that big bathtub and washing his hair for him as often as he could. And then later when they were lying in bed Armand was fascinated by how long and pale blond Marius's hair was, silkier than even Bianca's. He'd have his fingers tangled in it as he fell asleep and Marius would have to gently pry them out so he could get out of bed every morning.

•Who makes sure the other has meals/stays hydrated?

In the past? Marius would ply mortal Armand with food and keep their cooks working into the night, for if he had a whim to feed him honey and figs at midnight he was going to do it. It was a special pleasure watching Armand eat, because he was always so fascinated by the exotic things Marius managed to have imported into Venice for him to try. And then later, when Armand was immortal- watching him feed then was a special pleasure too.

Now? With his lapses into focusing too hard on painting or on his work at court, Armand is compelled to check in on him. He has a smart mouthed way of hassling him to get his nose out of a book and get out in the city that's so reminiscent of young Amadeo that Marius can't help but shake his head and do as he's asked.

•Who is more likely to stand up to anyone for the other?

Oh man, what question considering their history lol I think they both know they're capable of fighting their own battles but if anyone stepped to Armand in a dangerous way Marius would be there, hoping to make up for his past failures by protecting him this time.

•Who is the most likely to prepare a surprise for the other?

In TVA Armand mentions the boys preparing things to read or music to play when Marius came home and I think he was instrumental in organizing some of that. He would pick the readings or the music for the night, or if he was feeling feisty he'd put together a little fencing tournament with the boys to surprise Marius and Bianca together.

And then in the modern day, when Armand picks up art again- he would surprise Marius with that, and leave one of his first paintings in half a millennia in his rooms as a gift for him.

•Who makes the other pinky promise not to do certain things?

Armand does it, specifically for the dry look he gets when, in front of the entire court, he makes Marius pinky promise to let this meeting end on time and not sit there asking Lestat questions that they all know Marius will ignore the answer to anyways.

•Who puts a blanket over the other when they fall asleep on the couch?

Marius. It's a habit he developed when Armand was mortal and more affected by temperature. He'd drift off on the bed and, unwilling to wake him and make him get under the covers, Marius would get one of his silk velvet cloaks out to cover him with. It's the same now if he passes the sofa and sees Armand has drifted off with a book. He finds the nearest throw blanket and tucks it around him.

[desertfangs]

I know it's said in one of the later books that neither Daniel or Armand enjoy spending too much time in court and would rather go back to Trinity Gate but the thought of having Daniel there just being his ridiculous self a la QoTD is delightful. This is the same guy who was doing his own version of holding back laughter during a genocide and yes, part of it was because he'd recently been turned and was still in awe of everything but IMHO that's also part of who he is and how he responds to crisis situations. So picturing him being there during important meetings and witnessing the ins and outs of dealing with Lestat's court is hilarious. I imagine him having to excuse himself at times just to go to another room to let out the giggle he'd been holding back for hours because the whole thing IS kinda funny when you think about it.

LOL yes. I mean, Daniel was so overwhelmed when the Akasha thing went down. He'd almost died of alcoholism which absolutely means he spent the last days of his mortal life in this weird fog of confusion because of all of the ammonia in his brain since his kidneys were failing. Then he was turned into a vampire and overwhelmed by the strength and enormity of vampire senses and one of the first things he does is go to Lestat's concert, which had to feel surreal AF. Like, Daniel has been thinking of Lestat as this sort of almost mythical figure for over a decade and now on his like pretty much first night as a vampire, he's with Armand at Lestat's rock show? Tell me you wouldn't be laughing your ass off at the irony of that alone.

It's not that I think Daniel can't take things seriously, but I agree that he's definitely one of those people who's reaction to really dark and terrible things is to laugh and make jokes. Gallow's Humor is his friend. But IIRC he's pretty level-headed during the whole chaos in PL, so I think he can absolutely hold it in when he needs to, especially now that the colors of the wallpaper aren't distracting him and he knows how to manage his vampire senses better.

That said, I'm sure Court is ridiculous in a lot of ways. The part I think Daniel finds the funniest is that like... Marius, Lestat, and Louis are people he knows. Like he spent a decade with Louis and Lestat in the back of his mind as these people from Louis' story, and even Louis probably stopped feeling entirely real and then bam, they were just at his house for some long stretch of time. At this point, they're just people in his life.

But then at Court they're the Prince and the Prince Consort (whatever the fuck that means.... don't tell him, he knows what it means, he's just being an ass), and the Prime Minister, and things are probably often set up in a formal way in order to demonstrate to the younger set and the other immortals that this is a real, functioning vampire government (for now). And Daniel is just like... okay, sure, Lestat is the Prince or whatever, but that guy also keeps tagging me and Armand in instagram videos of people doing Blender Unboxings.

I'm sure he absolutely sometimes loses it when they're spending an hour debating some inane thing or whether to go stop some rogue vampire who is leaving a trail in some small country village or whatever their business entails. And it's worse if Lestat gets bored with it, because then the two of them start texting or having some kind of discussion with the Mind Gift and aren't paying attention, which frustrates whoever's leading the meeting (probably Marius). Maybe Lestat starts sending him suggestive mind images or who even knows. Or Armand starts giving him looks that means he's also thinking of which closet they abscond to when the meeting is over, and finally after some or all of this, Daniel has to stand up and exit the meeting so he doesn't burst out laughing in the middle of it.

I also think Daniel is very pragmatic and he as a pretty optimistic view of the world and vampirekind. So like sometimes while watching things go down, he's probably just standing in the background listening to some of the ancient vampires debate some archaic thing and finding it absurd. I would like Daniel Molloy's impressions of vampire court, because I'm sure he has some hilarious observations about the way they do things. So yeah, in those cases, too, he's probably sneaking off to go let out those giggles so he doesn't get yelled out again for not taking it seriously. And he does, but sometimes it's so absurd you can't help but laugh.

There's a lot of hilarity to be had in this scenario and a lot of potential for silly fic or fanart about it, because sometimes it is just kind of ridiculous, and Daniel absolutely understands that better than any of them. (Although I'm sure Armand does, too, and Lestat is in on the joke sometimes as well. But damn, he looks good in a crown!)

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV S2 Ep3 Musings - Loumand

Last post, I promise; I needed another nap; this ep's a freaking rollercoaster. And these two queens nearly gave me a stress ulcer!

DEBATABLE, Louis. I can think of FAR worse vamps than you, love.

Why're y'all having this whole conversation where anyone can hear?

They got Sartre's wall-eyes down; good makeup this season, team! 👌

DreamStat's a Loumand bed-death truther, jfc. 😭

I wanna know EXACTLY what Armand sees--or "feels"--whenever DreamStat pops up in Lou's head. Cuz he clearly knows precisely where Les is; he looks right in his direction. But does he HEAR Les too? (God I hope not, this song would've had me SEETHING--Back to Hell with you! 😅)

"Oh dear" indeed; I was HOLLERING.

SAM WAS DEVOURING THIS SCENE HOLY GOD GO AWAY DEMON

Armand looked PISSED, I was scared for Louis' life! And he DOES know, actually, yes Lou. I can almost GUARANTEE that he knows PRECISELY where Lestat is AT THIS VERY MOMENT, yes Lou.

If only you knew.... 😬

Claudia's suffered more than Christ. And nice cut to Daniel sneaking around with Raglan James as Armand talks about Furies punishing "human wrongdoing." It's really interesting that Armand told the lawyer that LOUIS is the owner of the paintings. Is he the owner of the penthouse too? HOW MANY DEEDS DOES HE HAVE, ROLIN?

I wonder what AMC might be saying about Loumand's art collection, not just wrt what we know about art heist!Armand (which we'll likely see a nod to in Ep4 at the Louvre); but also wrt what we know about Dubai's godawful neocapitalist hellscape economy, and Loumand's "moralizing" about Parisian black markets in S01E02.

I wonder if that's the excuse Armand'll give the coven when Louis shows up for dinner in Ep4--very much NOT dead; and rips out Santiago's tongue.

WILD voice-over, cuz you KNOW that's what Santiago was thinking, too, LOL. (You wish, Francis.) But yes: Louis' finna end your whole career. XD

Another TERRIFYING jumpscare from the coven, like in Ep2 with Annika. Louis, I am shocked & appalled--can you not HEAR all these vamps planning your bloody murder around you? CLAUDIA! WTF!?

But this is how you know Armand's true personality--he hates getting his hands dirty. He kills all the time, but he makes his victims' deaths pretty. He'd rather sit back & let Lestat/Louis come in and wreck his whole coven, even though he has the power to just light those mofos up all on his own! I wish AMC emphasized a bit more that Armand not only writes/directs the plays--he's an ACTOR, too. And istg he's an expert at PRETENDING to be helpless, meanwhile he's the strongest vamp that's NOT one of the Children of the Millennia (thanks to how well Marius made him).

Armand, that is LOW; waiting until Claudia's stuck under the oaths b4 you tell her she's guilty of breaking Great Laws she doesn't even know about yet. WTF?

How TF you gon' hold Louis accountable for following the Laws when he wasn't even allowed to be in the effing room when they were read!? He's not even a member! WTF! (I get it--any rogue vampires are subject to death, yadayada; we know it's a stupid policy.)

I love how he plans to leave by himself here--it had nothing to do with picking "another one" over Claudia. He just didn't want to hold her back anymore. And his presence was causing problems. 😭 It's so cute that Louis' stipulation about London was that if it's "too large" he'd leave and go to Ireland (?!?)--he's become agoraphobic or something? He just wants to be alone in his hermit hole--MOOD. 😭

Good to get confirmation that the Fire Gift here is Armand and blessedly NOT Santiago--so why's he zooming around in the sewers?

Look, sometimes folks make terrible first impressions--Lestat was being hella racist, Louis' always playing defense, Armand was finna kill Louis in a gay public park. It happens.

Foreshadowing like crazy, as usual.

WILD thing to say. I'm gonna cry, please stop.

(What kinda hypocrisy is that, when you were made young your dang self!?) She's already 30+ years old--maybe she'll last a little longer if y'all (read: sexist, racist, ageist, ableist, etc society) don't eff around tryna make her life even harder! But AMC's deliberately cutting Claudia's life in half, compared to the books, cuz misogynoir's real and Claudia gets NOTHING out of vampirism, not even a fair chance. And y'all let her into the coven KNOWING how much she loves y'all, and KNOWING y'all were gonna kill her. EFF THIS WHOLE COVEN, ARMAND INCLUDED. (Lemme calm down--this kind of betrayal is exactly how Lestat must've felt in S01E07; I get it; they're getting a taste of their own medicine. But LESTAT EFFING HAD IT COMING. The coven should've just told them: y'all got til sunrise to GTFO our territory, you're not welcome here. This whole bit's unnecessary.)

THE PARALLELS ARE PARALLELING

SKILL ISSUE. Cuz Louis' got the least power, and he's finna clear that whole bish out in just a couple episodes. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Louis, love, ARMAND DON'T GIVE A EFF ABOUT RAISING SOME OTHER MAN'S OFFSPRING. This is the call of the wild, as Alphas KILL the children their stolen Omega brides had for other Alphas/Betas, so he can restart the gene pool with HIS DNA instead. I know y'all had National Geographic back then already--READ A BOOK, Louis, it's what you're best at.

Incredible. After all of that Louis said Lestat never broke him. BENT BUT NEVER BROKEN, that's right! 💪😤

Boy, we're not talking about some little (unrequited) CRUSH over a man you only knew for a few months (which you've CLEARLY not gotten over yet). Louis was MARRIED to the man for 30 YEARS. This is his MAKER. Lestat knew his whole family; went to the Black cookouts and everything! They literally built a home AND business together! They raised a child together! WHATCHU KNOW ABOUT THAT!?

And that's LESTAT'S DAUGHTER TOO--how much can you possibly love EITHER of them while planning to knock her off!? I can't listen to too much more of this. *hands Louis the torch and scythe*

Beautiful end of this STACKED episode. Incredible work, AMC! Jacob acted his PANTS off; he excels at the trembling voice, agonized facial expressions, and utter mental breakdowns. He's pulling DEEP within him, holy god; it's so raw, it's almost hard to watch. EMMY WHEN?!

[nalyra-dreaming]

Let me use this opportunity of getting weird Loumand anons once more to say something that's been on my mind:

All the bad faith, passive aggressive anon asks (especially those wanting to make the "ships" about the fandom "shipping them" (or not) because of "color" and "racism") I see around piss me off sooooo much.

Lets look at the "ships" we have so far:

Loustat: difficult, at times toxic, later not so much, endgame

Loumand: difficult, at first infatuated, then dead, later healing

Lesmand: difficult, at times insane, obsessive in parts

Devil's Minion: difficult, intense, at times insane, obsessive in parts, endgame

What have all these "ships" in common?

They are canon relationships. And they are difficult.

Two of those are endgame.

Let's dive in (a bit).

Loustat:

At this point not much has to be said about why Loustat are toxic in parts, but that changes - their character journeys are inverted, and they are endgame. Two sides of the same coin. They are "petty and in love" as Jacob called it, and they are "it" for each other, for better or for worse.

Loumand:

Born from Lesmand actually, because Lestat goes to Armand to make him care for Louis (and for Armand's blood), which... works. But the initial infatuation phase, while honest on Louis' side, is based on Armand's fascination with him because of Lestat. He gaslights Louis into loving him. I bet they will be very much shown to be in love, and then the shit will hit the fan and then... Louis will be destroyed, for a long, long time. Qualifies as toxic for me, too, btw. The Loumand in later years, in Trinity Gate (or Dubai?) is a more healing one, one where Louis comes to terms with who he is and what he wants in safe, stable, loving surroundings. And I bet they are freaks in the sheets :P

Lesmand:

Obsessive, and while loving definitely more so from Armand's side than Lestat's. He "imprints" on Lestat when he sees him because Lestat reminds him of Marius, and a lot of Armand's actions are informed by his need for Lestat, and the fact that Lestat upends his world. That said, the fascination itself is mutual, and I bet the show will have them engage in a proper affair.

Devil's Minion:

Wohooo, Daniel, a gift from Louis for Armand!!! Armand shifts full on obsessive and love on Daniel, Daniel, who will become his only fledgling. (And who goes mad for a while, too!) The show has obviously expanded the journey, but I don't think it will change too much - Daniel is the only one Armand could not let die. Talk about love beyond reason or endurance.

ALL OF THESE SHIPS ARE RELATIONSHIPS IN THE VC.

YOU CANNOT PUT A VALIDATION BASED ON SKIN COLOR ON THEM BECAUSE THEY ARE ALL VALID.

And they are canon.

Saying the fandom doesn't "ship" Loumand because of them being POC is just ludicrous.

If you think Louis in Dubai in season 1 is "happy" I don't know what to tell you. We haven't really seen "happy" Loumand yet, and, depending on how they spin it(!) we might not even see it in season 2, though I think they will make it seem as if it is happy and "pure" at first.

But they might throw in the horror of Claudia knowing (and she does, canonically, she tries to warn Louis!) and being ignored by Louis (failing her again) in - in fact, I take the little info of the scenes we have of Sam and Armand filming as precisely that, namely that they make it clear that there is a relationship there as well... and how that relationship enables Loumand.

And then Armand will kill Claudia. And Madeleine.

And Louis will stay with him.

Personally I found later Loumand always very healing, as said. (But, personally(!!!!!!), also a bit boring. I love them, but... writing them (i.e.) does not hold much appeal right now.

But that might change with the upcoming seasons!) But the Loumand in Paris?? Hell, that's not even real, Armand gaslights Louis into loving him, uses his spell gift and mind gift as influence, poor Louis. And it will hurt Louis, incredibly so.

Making it seem as if people, especially people with a background in the books, do not "ship" them because of the actors' skin color... is just...

There's many, many reasons to ship them.

There's many, many reasons not to.

I OBVIOUSLY cannot speak for everyone. But these simplified takes are becoming so tiresome, when there are so many other reasons that need to be considered.

And honestly, as said before, I fully expect parts of this fandom to turn on Armand when he is being himself, when his relationship to Lestat is becoming clear, when his meddling and role in Claudia's death are clear and... can you imagine the outcry when they actually kill off the black (likely) lesbian character and her lover. -.-

If they actually chop of Claudia's head on stage.

Mayhem.

Which brings me to the next part:

My predictions for season 2:

Louis hurting, seeing Lestat everywhere (outcry)

Loumand in love, oh so sweet, look at them

Claudia gets a girlfriend!! (Sweet!)

What is Lestat doing there? (outcry)

What, Armand is interested in Louis because of Lestat?? (outcry)

What, Louis is yearning for Lestat?? (outcry)

What, Armand is doing what to Claudia (and Madeleine)? "ThEy KiLl tHe gAys!!" ((outcry)

Armand throws Lestat off a tower (Meh, he deserved it, should have been much worse)

What, Louis stays with Armand?? (outcry)

Whatever will go on with Louis and Lestat (outcry)

At some point people will turn on Assad, I agree here with what has been said by others on this.

They could not separate Sam from Lestat, they will not do so for Assad, in fact THERE I can easily see it be much worse, because of the racial implications.

I can also see them turn on Jacob btw, because Louis stays with Armand. "How could he". -.-

So: Even if you are only a "show fan", if you have no idea of what the books might bring... the hiatus is still very long, and going and hating on people, accusing them of racism, because people who know the books go a bit bonkers when they see certain bts photos... is on you - not them.

These ships are all canon relationships.

And valid.

End of rant.

[uncivilcivilservice]

⚜️ : de Romanus men - Marius/Armand/Daniel (/Benji?!) head canons through the ages (together or separate)

So for some reason my brain interpreted this as Marius with each of the other de Romanus boys headcanons, so that's what I've written haha

Marius/Armand

Some of Marius's clothes seem to go mysteriously missing whenever he visits TG. Armand refuses to admit it's him that's stealing them, blaming Daniel, or on an occasion that a red sweater went missing while Daniel wasn't at TG, Louis.

Absolutely no one is buying it, but the other TG residents don't bother calling him out when they see him wearing Marius's clothes after he's left

Marius/Daniel

So important context is that part of my idea of Daniel's condition after leaving Armand is that he experiences difficulties talking (either physically getting the words out, or disorganised speech/disorders of thought, making it hard to be understood) and that this also affects the mind gift

As a result Marius and Daniel come up with a way for Daniel to communicate while holding Marius's hands

Examples:

- Squeezing right hand for yes, left for no

- Long, hard squeeze means "I'm not okay" or "something is wrong" and comes in handy even when Daniel can speak when they are out and about holding hands and Daniel starts feeling overwhelmed

- Three short squeezes means "I love you (too)". I absolutely stole this from a tumblr or reddit post and it's probably where this entire idea started, oops

- They also have signals for things like hungry/need to hunt, confused/lost/what's going on?, I want to be alone, I'm okay all things considered etc.

Marius & Benji

They help each other learn digital art skills

Benji helps set up the programmes and teaches Marius how to use the software and graphics tablets etc.

Marius teaches Benji how to actually use the tools and about how to use colour and, y'know, art stuff (I'm not an artist okay)

Benji enjoys spending time with his maker and learning about this stuff, but long term they bond more over photography than painting or drawing, and again Benji helps Marius get started with things like photoshop

[hekateinhell]

Hi! I'm a show watcher that's been trying to get into the books. I have seen around that Armand vowed to never make a fledgling but broke this vow for Daniel. Why did he vow to never turn another person?

Hi! 🖤

Okay, just a head's up - there's no real way I can give a detailed answer without spoilers so save this for later if you'd like to avoid them for now!

Jumping in, Armand actually touches on this topic in TVA and gives a somewhat straightforward response:

I was a firm believer that those we make ourselves will always despise us for it. I cannot claim that I have never despised Marius, both for making me and never returning to me to assure me that he had survived the horrible fire created by the Roman Coven. I had sought Louis rather than create others.

Armand never wanted to create other vampires, which is really no surprise given how horrible most of his lived experience as a vampire had been.

He also seems to have a preference for communicating via the Mind Gift, almost as if comes easier to him than communicating verbally. When a vampire turns a human, it closes off their minds to each other forever — something Armand particularly emphasizes in his tirade to Lestat in TVL when he mentions 'the veil' aka 'veil of silence':

"Oh, but it's always a travesty, don't you see?" he [Armand] said with that same gentleness. "Each time the death and the awakening will ravage the mortal spirit, so that one will hate you for taking his life, another will run to excesses that you scorn. A third will emerge mad and raving, another a monster you cannot control. One will be jealous of your superiority, another shut you out." And here he shot his glance to Gabrielle again and half smiled. "And the veil will always come down between you. Make a legion. You will be, always and forever, alone!"

Armand will never be able to communicate with his fledglings the way he can Lestat and others besides his own maker.

And interestingly enough, Armand did accurately prophesize the outcomes of several of Lestat's fledglings over the next hundred years. Gabrielle (shuts Lestat out); Nicki (goes mad); Louis (resents him); Claudia (need I say more?).

Even if Armand didn't have so much trauma from his own life and his maker abandoning him, I have to imagine bearing such close witness as to how the maker/fledgling dynamics played out for Lestat would be enough to make anyone second guess the whole idea. For Armand it must have served to reinforce every preconceived notion he had on the matter. He even said to Lestat:

"Remember that when your dark children strike out at you, when they rise up against you. Remember me."

And we have still to broach the final layer (in this post — dissecting the entire topic will end with me writing a dissertation and nobody wants that). But Armand was torn away from his maker at a very young age and he did spend the next three hundred years of his life in service of a Satanic cult, which was instrumental in shaping his perspective and driving home the belief that vampirism is the ultimate condemnation.

Yet in the centuries of his long obedience, Armand kept two secrets to himself. These were his property, these secrets, more purely his than the coffin in which he locked himself by day, or the few amulets he wore. The first was that no matter how great his loneliness, or how long the search for brothers and sisters in whom he might find some comfort, he never worked the Dark Trick himself. He wouldn't give that to Satan, no Child of Darkness made by him. ~ Lestat passing on Armand's story as it was told to him in TVL

In a way, I think it was the only measure of autonomy Armand felt he might have had during the cult years. He wouldn't give that to Satan! He wouldn't do that to another being!

And yet, eventually... he did.

And yes, Armand was different person by the end of Devil's Minion but it was obviously still a decision that pained him. One that he said he did out of loneliness but also love, and it's up to the reader to decide how hyperbolic Armand thought he was being when he tells Daniel as he's offering him the choice: "We'll be in hell together after all."

As an aside: it fascinates me how Armand and Lestat both suffered from this agonizing loneliness and yet they each approached it in entirely opposite ways.

[blueiight]

Also the Armand casting is a choice cause they made him older for obvious reasons but they could've cast an older actor but kept him smaller in stature. instead they've cast someone who's the same age as Jacob and also quite a bit talller, and Armand is constantly seen towering over Louis in the framing. Wonder what that implication is?

yea! it has a number of implications. i love<3 the final shot where louis says armand is the love of my life & armand just stares daniel down while louis smiles his la gummy smile w no teeth showing

me and the bad bitch i pulled by being a funguy* [gaslighting, manipulating, gatekeeping, the mind gift, and a lil bit of the game Operation & the movie Human centipede b4 it was made]

armand was always a domineering presence whos attuned to the tricks of the mind. his youthful appearance was deceptive to the creature within. making louis unsettled, so that he could crawl back into ur arms& seek ur love. making lestat unsettled bc he sees lestat as his maker reborn of sorts, using les as a means to get the answers he thought hed never be able get out of marius. [i always thought thts why armand was so obsessed w lestat, he didnt need louis as a way to get to lestat like ppl think. armand was attracted to how vulnerable & ‘easy to adore easy to abandon’ like he says louis was independent of les.] i think assad zaman will be an excellent armand bc [based on what i seen of his work] he has a long history in the theater world and i believe he can bring the gravitas n horror behind a cute face still? even tho hes tall and older , as a tall person w an adorable face i love assad for that & am excited to see him give this

[monstersinthecosmos]

The quote you posted by Marius ... "I have lived lies. I have done it again and again. I live lies because I cannot endure the weakness of anger, and I cannot admit the irrationality of love."

What do you think he meant by "I cannot admit the irrationality of love"?

I must be super stupid cause I have no clue. Like is he saying he fears love? Thinks love as a sort of weakness/inconvenience? Is he having an allergic reaction to love in general?

If possible.... Can you break down the entire quote?

!!!!!! This is one of my fav Marius quotes, I’d love to talk about it.

So I noticed this actually comes up in Loustat as well, there’s a part in TVL where Lestat says his love for Louis is humiliating and I think about this a lot. I think it’s your choice if you ascribe this to Anne Rice’s own feelings and philosophy that got woven into her work, or we can also say that it’s another way that Lestat and Marius are incredibly alike. 

Lestat says “the sheer excitement was excruciating, and the love I felt for him was positively humiliating.” which has always stuck with me!!! And in Lestat’s case I think it can be read as “I love Louis so much that I will act like a fucking moron” etc. LOL. I wonder for him if it means he’s overwhelmed by it, senseless, unintelligible, etc. 

It also comes up with Akasha in QOTD: “She loved him and it humiliated her, and so she sought to hurt him. And she had.”

And speaking of humiliation, these are a couple moments where Marius mentions humiliation in Blood & Gold:

His feelings @ Mael lol -  “I was trembling with this uncharacteristic and humiliating rage.”  

When Armand is abducted by zealots (callback to Marius being abducted by zealots) - “But that was gone. All was gone. Amadeo was gone. My paintings were gone. And there came again the desperation, the bitterness, the humiliation. I had not thought that such things could be done to me. I had not thought that I could be so miserable. I had believed myself so powerful, so very clever, so very beyond this abject grief.”

This is about Pandora leaving him - “I was too distressed, too perfectly miserable. I didn't want to see her companion, and when I thought of banging on the doors of her house, I found it too utterly humiliating.”  

So I’m bringing this up because I think it’s kind of getting at the same point. And forgive me if my aromantic ass is missing something LOL but it feels like Anne often wrote about the humiliation of being vulnerable, and there's a throughline of loving people feeling vulnerable. I think it’s especially potent in a character like Marius, and again since he and Lestat are so alike it makes sense that Lestat feels that way sometimes and it came up in other books. Not to talk about Lestat too much LOL, we just have a lot of material to work with from him. I think they’re both people who have always been rebellious and with that need for independence comes the need to know things and to be self sufficient. Modern emotional health and Brene Brown will tell you that vulnerability is a GIFT but when you’re this fucked up it’s hard! It’s scary! 

Like these are also a couple other things Lestat says in TVL that illustrate this point, too, when Armand is going nuts on all the books:  “I hate those who make me feel fear, those who know things that I need to know, who have that power over me.”   and  "Every word was received by a secret, humiliating curiosity and vulnerability." 

And going back to the Marius quote! I guess the point I’m making is that Lestat and Marius are people who feel insecure when they don’t have complete self possession or control, and to me this is one of Marius’s HUGE character beats and something he’s really been struggling with for his whole life. 

The quote “I have lived lies. I have done it again and again. I live lies because I cannot endure the weakness of anger, and I cannot admit the irrationality of love.” is part of a bigger moment where he’s frustrated by his own anger and stubbornness. This is the whole section: 

Avicus looked directly at me. He appeared quiet in his heart and genuinely moved by my words. But what was the use? I said no more. My proud calm was suddenly broken. The anger returned along with its weakness. I remembered the hymns of the grove, and I wanted to move against Mael, for all the ugliness of it, to quite literally tear him limb from limb. Would Avicus move to save him? It was likely. But what if he did not? And what if I proved stronger than both of them, I who had drunk from the Queen? I looked at Mael. He wasn't afraid of me, which I found interesting. And my pride returned. I could not stoop to a common physical battle, especially one which might become hideously awkward and ugly, one which I might not win. No, I was too wise for it. I was too good of heart. I was Marius, who slew the Evil Doer, and this was Mael, a fool. They made to walk away through the garden and I could find no words to say to them, but Avicus turned to me and said quickly, "Farewell, Marius. I thank you and I will remember you." And I found myself struck by the words. "Farewell, Avicus," I answered. And I listened as they disappeared into the night. I sat there, feeling a crushing loneliness. I looked at my many bookcases, and at my writing table. I looked at my inkstand. I looked at the paintings on the walls. I should have tried to make peace with Mael, surely, to have Avicus as my friend. I should go after them both. I should implore them to remain with me. We had so much more to say to one another. I needed them as they needed each other. As I needed Pandora. But I lived the lie. I lived it out of anger. This is what I'm trying to tell you. I have lived lies. I have done it again and again. I live lies because I cannot endure the weakness of anger, and I cannot admit the irrationality of love. Oh, the lies that I have told myself and others. I knew it yet I didn't know.

Marius’s whole schtick is that he sort of pretends to be this wise calm collected dude and he’s actually the biggest emotional mess. He is THE pettiest bitch. And part of this is like, him sticking to his culture, trying to be ~the spirit of his age~ is trying to always come back to logic and reason. He tries to like, logic his way out of having feelings and it just doesn’t work!!!! HE HAS LIVED LIES, HE KNOWS IT DOES NOT WORK. This comes up over and over in his book, that he is frustrated with his own anger, that he ruins his relationships, that he fucks up, and when he is being irrational & emotional he doesn’t like the person he becomes. He’s humiliated at the idea that he is a person who has feelings and needs.

(See also: my fav thing to bring up but him hitting Armand for being sad lol like he’s trying to TRAIN it out of someone else even though he knows he’s living a lie.)

So this moment with Avicus, he’s like desperately lonely and WANTS Avicus’s company and friendship. He wants to be able to love Avicus. But he’s got so much fucking unresolved rage @ Mael that he can’t be around him at all and doesn’t know how to navigate his own messy emotions.

And really any time Mael shows up, as funny as it is to be like “lmao Marius is the pettiest bitch, he makes Mael sound like such a moron”, please don’t forget that Mael is the closest thing Marius has to a maker at this point. Mael is the symbol of Marius’s rape and nonconsensual turning, and his ritual sacrifice. Mael brought Marius to his own murder!!!!!!!!!! Mael is essentially his rapist.  And someone like Marius, who doesn’t know how to admit he has feelings, incessantly tries to tell himself (and everyone else) that Mael is a blundering fool instead of having to confront this extremely real hurt. 

As easy as it is to write off Marius’s bullshit as “toxic masculinity” or “man who won’t go to therapy” (which is a completely valid read LOL) it’s also very much steeped in trauma. And like, as much as I want to allow Marius a space to exist in his own world and talk about him in 360 degrees, he’s also not real. He’s a character in a book that survives the whole series as an unmoving object. Marius’s ability to heal or grow or be better is not really the point (but I do think there’s clues in canon that he can make it there; I think him in the PL trilogy is very much a New Marius!); he can survive the entire series as a table setting to represent toxic masculinity and there’s no obligation to heal. But the series asks us to spend time with monsters, to see the good in bad people, to ask if we are all our worst deeds, to ask what makes us human, and I think it’s good to take these characters seriously as wounded people making mistakes. 

The tragedy of it, too, is that Marius is just grinding ALL his emotions down in the process. He cannot allow himself to feel his own anger, and in the process of burying it, he also can’t feel love. He cannot live in this standard where it’s okay to embrace the irrationality of love but not the irrationality of anger. Throughout the whole series, every time he loses his temper and lashes out he just immediately feels humiliated for it and yet he can’t find a middle ground where he can just allow himself to feel things. And he cannot find it in himself to forgive Mael or confront these uncomfortable emotions, which means he cannot have Avicus and means he’s doomed himself to more isolation. 

Feelings are not rational! They make you act like a fool! They make you open the floodgates to other feelings you do not want to feel! 

I just think he’s such a fascinating character because like, he knows! He knows! He knows he does this! He hates himself for it! He doesn’t know how to get better! He knows he’s a fuckup! He’s lonely but if he tries to love someone it’ll destroy him!!!