#man city incorrect quotes

[kylianmbappee]

[karmaspidr]

Batman: What is the situation, Commissioner?

Gordon: Some of Joker's guys tried to rob a shipment of Ace Chemicals. My guys got an anonymous tip, most likely from those responsible for this, saying where they are and that the situation has been handled. And to also bring a few ambulances.

Batman: Scans the scene. Paramedics are treating men with clown face paint. Cops are struggling to cut down tied-up men in ridiculously high places. Some were receiving emergency surgery.

Batman: Any idea who did this?

Gordon: Figured it wasn't your squad. Hands Batman a note. It reads, 'Courtesy of Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends. P.S., sorry about the blood.

Batman: Turns to some of the thugs.

Thug 1: The Devil... The Devil is in Gotham. He's come for us all!

Thug 2: It was like fighting three different people at once. One moment he was throwing baterangs at us and the next he was caving our fucking skulls in.

Thug 3: I don't know how he did it. He was like ten feet away. I shot him. I should have hit him. But when I fired, he was in my face. And he made fun of me!

[shit-people-probably-didnt-say]

Matthias: I identify heavily with cartoon witches because please leave me alone with my soup this is why I lived in the forest in the first place

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Tony: You said that if you were ever going to do same sex experimentation, it was going to be with me.

Steve: I have never said that to you.

Tony: It’s been implied.

Steve: By you.

[thelordhunkyhair]

Mr. Forkle: enters Sophie’s mind without permission

Sophie’s thoughts: hippity hoppity, get off my property

[harringroveera]

Sometimes Eddie forgets that his man is an old man

[leclercloml]

Footballers | Fake Text Part 10

[theturtlebappe]

[h4unted-d4rling]

Poor Jim

[why-so-forward]

*Ruben, Erling, and Johnny all watching something on the field*

Erling: That's so cool!

Ruben: I know! That's crazy!

Johnny: Some mind blowing shit right there!

*Bernardo and Ilkay standing behind them not seeing anything but their backs*

Bernardo: Fuckin' beanstalks blocking the view!

Ilkay: It's like watching a wall!

[incorrect-futbol-quotes]

*Klopp and Pep are arguing about something stupid*

Hendo: ...Pep is right

Klopp:

Klopp: You're fired

[kylianmbappee]

Jack: i can be mean to you

Y/n: no you can't

Jack: [slaps the bottle out of y/n's hand]

Y/n:

Y/n: you gonna pick that up?

Jack: yeah, I'm sorry

[practically-an-x-man]

Director: alright, here's the role. We're looking for a suave, Southern-

Casting director: *already typing in a phone number*

Director: -slightly terrifying mass murderer.

Casting director: *holding up the phone* yeah, yeah, I know, I've got Mr. Holbrook on the line right here. He'll do it.

[nexttrickanvils]

Honestly the surprising thing is that Zuke got to the guy before May did.

Based off a scene from Parks and Rec.

Full view for best results and reblogs appreciated!~ <3

Bonuses under the cut:

[thefearfulheart]

Miika: Alek, I think you should play the role of my father. Aleksandr: I don't wanna be your father. Miika: That's perfect. You already know your lines.

[thelordhunkyhair]

Fork man: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no clue what to put in them. Suggestions?

Sophie: Put spaghetti in it.

Fork man: I'm currently taking suggestions from literally anyone but you.

Keefe: Put spaghetti in it.

Fork man: I'm currently taking suggestions from anyone but you two.

Fitz: Put spaghetti in it.

Fork man: I'm no longer taking suggestions.