#football incorrect quotes

[miroslavcloset]

*Happily shakes the chicken*

Incorrect Bayern Quotes

[leclercloml]

We need a Pedri version to this

https://www.tumblr.com/leclercloml/725989724597125120/footballers-fake-message-part-5-pablo-gavi?source=share

Hello anon! Yes ofcourse I can!! here it is hope you like it 🫶🏻🫶🏻

Footballers | Fake Text Part 8

(Pedri Gonzalez edition)

[mourinhomerchant]

atleti as textposts

[kylianmbappee]

[At a restaurant]

Gavi: Hey, are you single?

Y/n: Yes I am.

Gavi: [Takes away the extra chair in

front of] Thanks.

Y/n:...

[Gavi walking back to his table with chair in his hand]

Pedri:What are you doing, you told me that you'd ask her number!!

Gavi: I GOT NERVOUS!!

[why-so-forward]

Ronald: you know, the smaller they are, the angrier they are; cause they don't have as much space in their bodies to contain all that anger.

Sergi: That is not how that works.

Lewa: Like it's not even close to being at least a bit scientifically accurate.

Alejandro: oh yeah? What about Pomeranians

Ansu: And chihuahuas

Fermin: And Gavi

[gaemen]

NOTE: Looks like those middle school confessions. VERY SORRY JS THOUGHT OF IT WHEN I FOUND THIS IMAGE SITTING AROUND IN MY CAMERA ROLL😭‼️)

Joshua: My crush isn’t picking up on my hints.

Leon: What hints have you given them?

Joshua: Well, I think about them a lot, and sometimes I even think the eye contact we make is a sign.

Leon: Mayb—*gets cut off*

Joshua: I have feelings for you. *Looks away from him*

Leon: gets cut off again

Joshua: I like talking to you and being around you. *sighs*

Leon: is cut off again

Joshua: Do you realize that I am attracted to you more than you know?

Leon: What?! What does that mean?!

Joshua: You really don’t know? or are you acting?

Leon:* staring at him confused*

Joshua: … I thought that would be obvious by now.

*Before Joshua cut Leon off again, Leon placed his hand over Joshua's mouth.*

Leon: Quit talking already; I get it. Now that you have me all flustered, it's weird.

*Joshua looks at him with puppy eyes; the cold air made his eyes watery.*

Leon stares into his blue eyes: Wait, I don't mean weird, just that I'm all soft all of a sudden- I.. *Doesn't know what to say*

Joshua places his cold hands on top of Leon's: Me neither; I'm panicking. Um... let's just get back and forget about this, you know?

[sluttyvroomballs]

We are not same bro 😪

[theturtlebappe]

Gavi: Hermano, you are so close to perfection. Pedri: Oh really?! Gavi: Yeah. Because you are right next to me. Pedri:...

[antoniopuerta-fan-club]

Juanlu: Bro, I had a dream we fucked.

Isaac: Bro, relax it was just a dream.

Juanlu: Huh, gay, I wouldn’t fuck you.

Isaac: You wouldn’t?

Juanlu: I mean, unless you want to-

[pastryleclerc]

y/n and john are dating, her brother is one of his teammates - one day during england camp, they joke around:

gareth southgate: so, do you recognize any of these men? y/n: i was hiding in the bathroom stall, so i didn't see his face, but i heard him. he was singing along to the music at the bar. gareth southgate: do you remember what he was singing? y/n: i think it was that song, "i want it that way" gareth southgate: backstreet boys, i'm familiar. okay...number one, can you please sing the opening to "i want it that way"? jordan pickford: really? okay. *starts singing* you are my fire... gareth southgate: number two, keep it going. kyle walker: the one desire... gareth southgate: number three... luke shaw: believe when i say... gareth southgate: number four! declan rice: i want it that way... gareth southgate: TELL ME WHY! together: ain't nothing but a heartache gareth southgate: TELL ME WHY! together: ain't nothing but a mistake gareth southgate: now number five john stones: i never want to hear you say gareth southgate: WOO! together: i want it that way gareth southgate: ahh. chills you guys, literal chills. y/n: it was number five, number five killed my brother. gareth southgate: oh my god, i forgot about that part!

[miroslavcloset]

FYI Harold's british accent is the most british to ever accent

Incorrect Bayern Quotes

[leclercloml]

Footballer | Fake Text part 6

[mourinhomerchant]

Liverpool incorrect quotes

Robbo: with all due respect, which is none,

Curtis: *sneaks into kirkby at 2am* Virgil: *turns in swivel chair* care to tell me where you were? Curtis: I was with… Uh… Ali! Alisson: *also turns in swivel chair* Care to- *keeps spinning* Virg- I can’t stop the chair-

Ibou: pfft look at that idiot Robbo: *chasing after a squirrel with a baseball bat* Ibou: Ibou: shit that's my idiot

Curtis: why can't dinosaurs clap? Fabio: because their hands are too sh- Harvey: because they're all dead.

trent: i'm cold dominik: here take my jacket ibou: i'm cold robbo: *sets kirkby on fire*

dejan: would you kiss me for $100 mo: why? dejan: just curious mo: i guess? dejan: *slams $100 on the table* would you look at that-

[kylianmbappee]

[why-so-forward]

Gavi: *Gives Robert a friendship bracelet that says BFF*

Robert: Aww...I'm your best friend forever ❤?

Gavi: No, you my Best Father Figure! 😊

*Meanwhile*

Morata: * Heartbreaks * he has chosen someone else 😢.

[gaemen]

What if?

Alisson: If you bite it and you die, it's poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it's venomous. Robertson: What if it bites me and it dies!? Virgil: Then you're poisonous. Jesus Christ, Robbo, learn to listen. Trent: What if it bites itself and I die? Alisson: That's voodoo. Harvey: What if it bites me and someone else dies? Trent: That's correlation, not causation. Darwin: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die? Virgil, with a smirk: That's kinky.