#making an official post for this since it's done!
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CLONE HIGH CLOTHING SWAP!!(I'm gonna lore drop abt them but more importantly Anna )
Yayy lore time. So Anna is the clone of Anastasia Romanovna but she says she's the clone of Anastasia Romanov. This is because the other Anastasia Romanov is more well known and I like to include historical references in stuff. From what I know her body was never officially found, she was considered a mystery she was important because of that. Many people think she lived and escaped instead of being killed. Some people also pretended to be her or tried to for money from the aunt as is shown in the Disney movie. specifically Anna Anderson I think which is why I nicknamed her Anna. (If anyone needs to correct me on some of this stuff Ik its been a while since I've done research on the topic I've been researching other stuff.)
When Anna was cloned her foster father believed she was that Anastasia, so up until she was like 11 or so she believed she was Anastasia Romanov, she felt important. She watched the movie and loved the idea of being a princess, of being the one everyone was waiting for. Until one day scudworth told her she was wrong and got the names mixed up. So Anna saw Ivan and cried her eyes out. She didn't want to be the clone of some guys wife. She wants to be more important than that and not live in his shadow. She thinks she's important and seeing her dad disappointed about that really hurt her. So she decided that she was going to just cope. She'd forget everything scudworth said and live that lie. And it felt great for her, she brags about it alot. Though she's gone so far into coping she does almost believe it. because of that she's obsessed with popularity and living up to the real Anastasia Romanov. She wants to be famous, she studies hard and everything. She's even a cheerleader. Because of the coping thing it does make her view other people just as extensions of their clone parents. She thinks everyone thinks the way she does cause she's preppy. Also on why she expects people to be extensions of the clone parents is also due to some self loathing because of who she really is. That doesn't make her any less annoying though but I forgive her❤
Orginally Anna and Ivan were a ship because she couldn't fight her genes or whatever that's been erased actually I decided it'd be more interesting of she was a lesbian. ivan and her are still rivals. She doesn't know she's a lesbian yet tho cause comphet she's also Topher stepsister!! Basically they hate hate each other at first for obvious reasons and Topher even blackmails Anna. Then he does reveal who he's a clone of and she full on ignores him and calls him disgusting for like a week. But eventually they talk and they become a little closer? Anna starts understanding people aren't just their clone parents and she still like trying I guess? Topher also learns to not blackmail her so yay They have some solidarity, a little. They still don't like each other but its more in a sibling way.
Okay now Fyodor. Gonna guess no-one(but like one person) knows who Fyodor Basmanov is. I learned about him through some movies, basically Ivan the terrible had this alleged male lover. He was in the Oprichnina, like a secret police Ivan had made, and he rose in ranks fast. He was known as the favorite of the Tsar many people thought they were a thing(probably). There was rumors he'd wear skirts and dance for Ivan and stuff. Whether or not that's true in the Ivan the terrible movies he's in they actually do address it. In the 1940s two part one he sings this song abt killing people in a dress and a mask that is supposed to resemble Anastasia Romanovna in the beginning of the film. Which is actually why I made them do a clothing swap in the post. In the 1991 version he is sooo pretty and I can't understand everything in the film because no subtitles but I was able to get some context to what was happening. The story from what I know goes Fyodors the favorite and he uses that alot over other people, he sits next to the Tsar during meals and stuff, poisons people for him etc, then he tries to trick this other guy to get rid of him with witchcraft but word got back to Ivan and now they think Fyodor committed treason. So hes like no not me!!come on Ivan listen to me I'll tell everyone about us or something like that I don't know I could only understand some and he's dragged away. Real Fyodor apparently did get accused of treason by Ivan and he was ordered to kill his father. Some say then Fyodor was executed others say he was just sent away I don't know what really happened. Shrugs. Anyway
I made a clone of him just because I can ❤yay❤ he's Ivans ex friend they don't hang out anymore because Ivan thinks he's better than him. Fyodors just a chronically online guy that uses discord too much(gamer). He wears skirts too not for Ivan just cause I like gnc characters. Yay❤. Also Ivan and him weren't a thing though Fyodor probably does have a crush on him for a bit, the most Ivan does for him is buy him discord nitro. Which he doesnt do anymore. Fyodor does still sometimes try be friends with the bleacher creatures mainly cause sometimes he feels like he's nothing without Ivan so. Yeah. He's unsuccessful tho he's annoying af. He's cringe. He thinks it's funny tho
Anyway just realized I made three clones of Ivan the terrible lovers and I don't ship any of them with him(Maria's the third ill post about her another day. Her and Anna get together tho) this guy had like eight wives. I should really just clone all of them and make them a polycule(minus Ivan ofc) this is why I shouldn't study historical figures
#clone high#clone high fanart#clone high oc#fanart#oc artwork#Oc#artwork#rendering#anastasia romanov
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I know tumblr isn't the largest space for TwoSet fandom, but in case anyone wanted a summary of last night's livestream:
The livestream was cozy, comfortable, and lowkey. We started it by ordering bubble tea. They were in their old, beloved Brisbane location.
They will restore all the videos, probably sometime today or tomorrow.
They will also try to reinstate the Instagram posts, though asked for patience because they're not sure how to do that.
They hid the videos because of an underestimation of fan sentiment. They didn't think people watched those old videos anymore, so they figured curate the chaff and just leave a few they were proud of for people to dig into and interact with.
They were receptive to this being the wrong choice, apologized, and talked about how in retrospect they could've done this better and communicated faster. They seemed in the know about different fan theories that popped up during the 50 days of silence.
B2TSM was definitely a passion project and it was a ton of work over the course of a year. They said they paid mid-six figures for these music videos and will be losing money off them.
They are closing down their store and once the latest round of merch for their music videos is gone, there will be no more merch.
They will not quit touring. There is now an official interest sign-up for a 2025-2026 World Tour on their website.
Their immediate plan is to take a break. They got as exhausted as they were during the kickstarter days when they were busking 24/7 on the streets.
After that... they don't know. They admit it's scary. But they want to keep forging new ground and finding new ways to advance classical music. Their mission to keep promoting classical music is ongoing.
Their last video (released today) is meant to speak to how they've felt about the last eleven years. They spoke positively and said they will never forget this chapter of their lives.
They are done-done making videos. Not to say it's impossible another won't happen (ex: TwoSet Talks), but it's best and most accurate to just say they're done-done.
TwoSet Academy is still being talked about in a vague fashion, though they did mention they have interest in promoting classical music education. So feel free to still sign up for that. Frankly it sounds like they're still figuring out what it'll entail.
They have multiple ideas of what to do next, but it'll take time for those to be honed into something good.
You can sign up for a newsletter for project and life updates to hear when they get around to it.
Since everyone was asking about health, again, they did get exhausted, but both are healthy. Brett's mysterious medical condition from 2020-2021 that people were concerned was an ongoing life thing sounds more like it was a one-time deal that exploded out from stress. He told us it was life-threatening, though, which was.... information. Relieved all over again that he got better.
They honestly but respectfully went through all the major controversies that have happened in the last year because fans asked about them. They tried to avoid going into drama or ripping into privacy, but acknowledged when something had already played its course, so answers were now okay to say. There were a few times where I think they didn't know both sides of a situation, but that's the normal and inescapable experience of being human, and insofar as everything they knew, they came off authentically and honestly in how they handled each scenario.
Controversies they went through included: the workplace allegations on reddit from 2023, the falling out with Jordan He after Fantasia, their distanced relationship with Ray Chen, and issues with content creators being inauthentic and chasing measurements like views and subscribers.
They seem like genuinely good and authentic guys. My respect to them, and I feel at peace with the whole situation.
Whole livestream just felt healing. If you want to go and hang out with Brett and Eddy, go do it there.
If you stumble into them on the streets, please go up and still say "hi."
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Ashur’s the *Divine*, and not one of his people - those who know, anyway - is naive enough to think that doesn’t carry with it a world of responsibility and duty. And Tarquin’s neither his manservant nor a fool - had Ashur ever tried to abuse his dedication to the cause, their partnership would not have gone far.
Or, on the masks they carry, and the parts they play.
~~~~
Relationships: Tarquin / Ashur | The Viper
Side characters: Dorian Pavus, original characters
Timeline: Pre-Veilguard, some time post-Minrathous Shadows
Themes: Slow burn, character study, class/power differences, action, some internal angst, some tooth-rotting sweetness
Rating: Mature [non-explicit, some violence, bordering on T-rated]
Word count: 10,716 / Chapters: 4/4
#tashur#viperquin#dragon age fanfiction#making an official post for this since it's done!#the brainrot has consumed me
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summer is over
#I LIED THE LAST TIME I SAID I'LL PROB NEVER POST FANART AGAIN#cropping or screenshotting makes the resolution go shit but i don't have another choice#(i think)#SUMMER ENDED AND I NEEDED TO VIKTUURI ON A SUMMER VACATION#so here's another thumb piece#i can't stop giving viktor those gold bracelets THEY'VE BEEN HAUNTING ME SINCE THE MOMENT I SAW THAT OFFICIAL ART#he needs them#i need to see him wearing them#yeah yuuri is looking at his lovely and pretty husband <3#aaand post swimming victuuri#real ones know that post swimming nap hits different 💯���#don't worry guys they have nectarins and water#all the essential things to survive#anyway ate one today it was DELICIOUS#ok i'm done#BYEEE#yuri on ice#fanart#victuuri#my brain is not working at midnight i swear#*i needed to draw viktuuri
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Oh my god it’s happening I’m actually getting excited about my Rook’s backstory that I, a genius, created
#I haven’t done this in ages I love oc making actually#I just had to live the highs and then the lows and then actually get high to process it all#it’s been SOOOO LONG since I’ve gotten attached to an oc oh my god I thought I was doomed#girl when you have an official name…#prawn posts
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ok time for some preliminary hand hunting for s3 🫡 aka giving myself a task this rewatch
#gonna do a full series rewtach later in the week just to make sure I've got ALL of the hands#but for now we're gonna do one just for s3 so i can have a basis since I've already got one for s1+2#and then ill make a neat list and put it in my book with space for s3e6#cus i want the majority of the work done before next week since i will have NO TIME for a full series watch again until april#and i don't wanna wait that long#so the final post of my Official hands hands hands <3 list wont be until at least next week#but im gonna try to do the majority of the work now!!#young royals#yr3#shh ac
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San Lang really is extremely busy!
#tgcf#hualian#hua cheng#xie lian#heaven official's blessing#tian guan ci fu#lang ying#fanart#artsyfartsy#sketch#sketchbook#daily sketch#was on the fence about posting this one since i’m not a huge fan of it#also i’ve fallen behind on the sketches because uni :(#this is one of my fav scenes tho. i wish i’d done it more justice 😔#when you don’t like how you drew the people so you add a background to make it feel less bad
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here's a messy little thing I scribbled while I tried to think of ideas and plot points for one of the longfics I'm working on.
If you're curious, here's the scene it was based on:
Once the flames and their light had receded, Xie Lian could make out a figure kneeling on the ground. A slender young man, wearing tattered dark robes, his black hair falling loose upon his back and shoulders. His form was flickering, a clear sign that he was not human.
Xie Lian broke through his bindings by shattering the rod he was bound to against the rocks. He stood up from the ground, careful as he walked closer to the figure. Just then, Ruoye zipped past Xie Lian, startling him a little. It came back and looped around him in an apology, before it leaped at the ghost and looped around him as well, patting his head in a clear reprimand. With how familiar Ruoye was acting, there was little doubt as to who this could be. Yet, Xie Lian needed to make sure.
“Xiao Hua?”
The ghost lifted his head, mismatched eyes looking up at him, joy and awe only barely concealed behind a veil of disorientation. Xie Lian was momentarily stunned at the sight of the crimson eye, mesmerized in kind by the fairness of the young man's face; his features were ones that many would be envious of.
“Are you... you're really that ghost fire?”
The ghost smiled, as he kept staring up at Xie Lian. He seemed confused, but soon enough, he nodded.
#tgcf#tian guan ci fu#heaven official's blessing#wu ming#ruoye#xie lian#scribbles#myart#fanfic#mywriting#hhhhhh I wish I could write faster#I'm having so much fun writing this one#I mean the total so far is 23k#but for a fic that's looking like it'll be 100k...#it's torture#I want to post the first 2 chapters since they're done#but all my multichapters on ao3 save 2 are unfinished#so I wanna make sure I can finish this one#yet the wait is unbearable#I wanna share the joy with people darnit
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2023 Art Purge
Original edition! Ended up having to split the doodles into two parts, I didn’t mean to end up with so many left over but oops - onto the commentary!
Remember crayon Edgar? I drew this one at the same time! Loosely based off Circus Baby but really just more of a general cutesy look - layering with colours is fun :)
Eyes, every year. Two general eyes, and two characters! Bottom left is Souichi, and bottom right is Vivian :) Vivian always gets a spare eye haha
Some concept art for a false backpack I still kinda wanna make - it’d be a prop for a game I made earlier this year, as the prize container! It’s meant to be kind of like a pop-up shop that can fold away fairly small and hold a bunch of small items safely and inconspicuously, though it wouldn’t actually work as a real backpack lol
Some Cherubsona concept art, thinking about their hair and the light rays - I considered having a single asymmetrical hair tuft, I think while I was still on the fence about having asymmetrical wings as well - I’m happy with the final design :)
And some baby angels! Based on my DQIX/AGE headcanons/actual canon lol, took a few tries to get a design I was happy with before settling on the bottom-most one with the fuzzed ears, lolling about haha. Cute!
Also thinking about “Fallen” designs, since my cherubsona is meant to be a fallen angel - or even just biblically accurate angels! Maybe they became more normal-looking after falling haha
More Charm doodles based on the Hungry idea - neither Frankenstein nor Zombies were quite what I was looking for, but they were close! Poor Charm, even if it is a Look
More eyes! Concept sketches of the Yanderapy boys :D Mitsu’s swirls and Ishida’s sleepy ♥ eye expression haha
An alternate panel of Mitsu being shy to admit his love language haha, I wanted his expression to be a little more visible but him hiding in the book is also very cute haha
Little doodle of Ishida singing Daisy Bell! He’s half-crazy all for the love of Mitsu after all
Technically these are from later in the year but I was really hoping to have the set up for a silly concept rolling - Ishida wants to play a game! The game would allow each of them to take a turn, with the goal of the game to be to sneak a gift into the other’s bag or pocket when he’s not looking. A cute and silly and fun concept to reverse pick-pocket the other and give a little treat! Totally harmless and not at all strange or weird or with any kind of underlying sinister vibes!
The punchline of course was that since they’re both yanderes that it basically turns into stalking each other, which as featured here, Mitsu is very into, who could have guess lol. The double punchline is that they’re both so aware of/obsessed with each other that they notice each other right away, but play along because it’s obvious that they’re both enjoying it haha It’s yandere enrichment! Ishida would also get a real rush from “hunting” Mitsu, as would Mitsu enjoy being “hunted” - yet more twisted love languages ♥
Random deer :) Actually one of the animals I considered for Dahlia early on but decided to scrap, because I don’t know how to draw deer lol
Also went through a couple scrapped designs for her artist friend, just to make sure I explored all my options thoroughly! I’m glad I did, but I’m happiest with the one I decided on, of course
Brief Dahlia and Tala meeting. They’re unsure of each other! Squirrels and dogs don’t have the best track record admittedly
Bit of vent :( Bar’s always good for it ♥
Bucket! :D Been a bit since I drew anyone from that cast, though I somehow made him on-model by accident lol, and of course he’s still cute! That’s the important part really
Eyesssssssss <3 <3 On the left were some quick comparisons between dot/filled-in eyes and eyes with a differentiated pupil and iris, since I’ve been defaulting to dark eyes a lot lately (it’s the Vargas influence lol); and on the right were a bunch of Cure eyes! I think at least partially studied off of some character creators? Lots of eye styles to choose from, which one suits her the best hmm. She has very sparkly eyes
And another sort-of study off a character creator haha, it’s very cute! Not very Cure, though
One of the early ideas that made me want to dig her out of storage was actually an animation idea that was maybe a liiiiiittle ambitious to go about making without her having a fixed design lol - I’ve always been a fan of magical girl transformations that completely glow-blot out the body and then they explode into frills and bows and fluff at the end haha. I would still like to come back to the idea at some point!
Ended up with a good handful of muscle studies, even after the ones I already posted - a lot of the poses ended up silly haha
And a lot of skull/face/neck studies as well, with mixed success :P
I’ll get it figured out eventually!
Sometimes it’s fun to just doodle around, shapes :) My own original human style feels so constantly in flux with the fanart I like to make and having so many non-human characters haha, probably doesn’t help that I prefer high stylism
A trio! They look kinda familiar, hmmm....
Yet more eyes lol, the first trying to figure shines. You can really see what a lack of editing does to the implied shapes pfft ♪
Always trying to figure out how to dragons! Another one I’ll have to get to Someday. There’s gotta be a trick to them >:0
Out of general studies and tests - hey I thought Just Desserts already had a sona??? And that she was like the most important and best and all that?? I got curious what my sona might be in the JD universe without being the villain haha, and I came up with a Chocolate-Chip Brioche Bun lad! :D I’ve always had something of an affinity for brioche, also somewhat inspired by Edgeworth’s cravat haha. But would Charm still exist and be wreaking havoc, or would this be the alternate universe Charm equivalent?? ‘Cause they’re definitely not “Charm”
Speaking of Charm tho! She’s holding a tooth lol - something something, candy people mining teeth? Because cavities? I dunno lol, but she’s certainly not all that much bigger than a tooth so that’s some fun scale for you :)
And finishing off with some cutesie little chibis :) I made the first as a reference for proportions, and the second to show how my holosona would look in that style haha, what a cute evil computer
#Doodles#Original#Long post#Extreme link-out edition lol#Multiple editions!#Had to be working on this one up to the last minute since y'know - still making even up to the end of the year!#Luckily this one was very well-behaved and didn't break even a little bit :) Very polite! Very appreciated haha#I have to admit I'm a little nervous about the fanart one on that front#But for now! Mostly silly sona stuff and OCs and the like :D Some concept art here and there#I'm gonna try harder in 2024 to have fewer leftovers - I like all of these! I want to show them off in their good timing!#I had fewer mixed salad greens in one post this year :0 That's on me#It's tough when I only end up with a small handful of doodles leftover to any given subject! But it's fine if some sets are smaller haha#I think the eyes will always have a spot in the end-of-year roundups tho haha#As always there'll be more 2023 doodles on the way! More than the previous years actually since I've gotten these roundups done early#Cuts both ways haha - queues still absolutely kill me |P But they do give me a cushion to work on bigger projects!#Just need the focus and energy for them lol#Anyway I'm getting ahead of myself a bit lol - there's still a whole 'nother one of these coming up sheesh lol#And I doubt that one will be as polite XP Even more reason to like this one! Haha#I'll letcha know when 2024 is ''officially'' here art-wise - I can tell you it won't be for a while haha
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Personal vent post, how I tag things, apologies for this probably showing up in search results because I'm not censoring words (do not have the spoons rn)
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So I'm getting really frustrated (at the situation, not at individual people! Sorry to vague right after getting a request, I was gonna make this post like a week ago) that multiple people have asked me not to tag Bro/Cal reblogs as Stridercest.
Stridercest does not mean incest, it means Strider/Strider relationship. I'm tagging it for followers who don't want to see Strider/Strider at all (or for those who do, too, I guess). On MY blog, it has NO bearing on whether or not something is incest. Lil Cal has been a Strider since Day 1 to me, way before any of the events after Act 6, as a pure vanilla puppet. A Strider by marriage, in my opinion. But I'm not opposed to calculating the amount of Strider that got put in Lil Cal, as I've done before. You also have Dirk/Hal which is also Stridercest, but not incest (at least in canon, sometimes it is incest in fan depictions). Or Guardiancest, which I don't think counts as incest in canon either (but usually always is in fan depictions). Even selfcest between one Strider (beta!Dave/beta!Dave in a time travel situation, for example) is still gonna be Stridercest to me.
The ONLY Stridercest I add the specific ship tag for is Bro/Cal, because that's otp5eva for me, separate from any other Strider stuff (Stridercest probably doesn't even make top 3 HS ships for me). Everything else only gets the blanket Stridercest in reblogs, because I already tag a lot, I don't have the energy to add nuanced tags for weird Strider situations, and whether or not that constitutes incest, or which version of a character it is, especially when the artist/authors don't usually make the difference explicitly stated in their own caption/tags, and sometimes it's vague on purpose! (I'm currently writing a fic where Bro and Dirk are the same person! I'm not gonna make the distinction a big deal.)
It's mostly frustrating because then I have to decide if untagging the relationship as Stridercest is going to make someone else following me uncomfortable who will then see it untagged.
Going forth, I am going to delete whatever reblog I made if I get this request from someone else again. I'm trying to remember names, so I don't reblog any future content that would conflict with their requests, but this has already happened with three people in like the past two weeks. Had to block one person for telling me to die because I tagged "Stridercest" on the post preventatively, as usual, because I care about tagging for my followers. (I literally checked their blog like 3 times to make sure they didn't have a DNI pinned, and I still got told to die for my efforts lmao.)
Literally, please just DM me privately (thank you to the other people who did, sorry for the trouble!), and I will either delete the reblog, or block you if you request that. I'm not TRYING to make people uncomfortable, which is the whole reason why I tag it to begin with.
So, I'm not un-tagging shit anymore, it's delete only from now on. I'm not going against my own blog rules I set both to try and accommodate my followers, and to make searching my blog easier for myself. (Used to not tag anything from like 2011-2016 or later, and I'm still in the process of back-tagging everything, since it's been so frustrating to find old fandom posts.)
#unrelated but if you need me to tag something else ill try and accommodate it#im just not differentiating all the stridercest ships in tags its not possible the artists dont always make the distinction known#im still tagging shit ppl asked me to in 2012 and i dont think ive seen them interact with me in years lmao#if i miss a tag on something u can dm me sometimes i forget to tag hs on things bc in trying to tag all the characters in a group#id rather over-tag something than under-tag it since this function is available on this site#i should make a pinned post or something explaining my other tags honestly but i dont think enough people care#its just ughhh its prob gonna take pc use to navigate my official about me page. which is an ordeal because i cant click to it...#...without using a mouse and my mouse doesnt reach to my couch where i usually use my pc#i hate that about mes have been made obsolete by pinned posts and the inability to see blog themes on mobile or by the share link#wouldve been nice if they made the option to put a button to the about me page accessible to mobile users#havent been able to update mine in a while ider whats on there besides highlights of my blogs#anyway i got irl shit to do rn i spent way too much time explaining all this ugh it takes me so long to type anything#Cori.exe#Post.exe#im about to have like the worst week of my life btw pls send prayers that i can physically attend all the appointments i have this week#i can hardly lift a cup of water to my mouth im in so much fucking pain and its humiliating and miserable#its not even the endo this time its my back and idk what triggered it. must have been built up bc of all the stress i put on it...#...over the past like 3 weeks of doing backbreaking activities that needed to be done. i hate this so much lol
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🦋
#the heater is fixed.#the poi isnt perfect but there is A Lot of it&its making eating... easier. so much easier. ppl give poi to their babies#bc its so easy to eat+digest&its also calorically dense&super filling.#&now i have some again. i have been missing home... so much. so very very much recently. &this is... enough. more than enough right now.#im going on an adventure tomorrow. i have a phone that can actually take decent pictures+videos.#i havent done a gratitude journal post in a long time. too long really.#but i am almost in tears right now over how grateful i am.#i am just... so incredibly grateful.#i spent a lot of today in a near constant state of panic for no special reason at fucking all.#&its incredible to be. calm right now. to feel safe. to know that everything that is constantly stressing me out hasnt disappeared#but its okay bc life isnt falling apart around me right now. i have actual time to untangle it all.#i realized earlier that this is officially the longest ive lived in one place since i was. 10? maybe? we could never keep a (rental) house.#how fucking wild is that?#im just. very very very grateful to be alive.#'i have so much more to tell you about being alive'.
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🛸
#quick minivent but uh after yesterdays mess im now officially completely done with being nice about endos oopsies#not that im going out of my way to be mean!! ofc not!! but if any of them tries to follow/talk/rb imma not be as nice with my boundaries#yeah someones harrassing the rest of my pack because i tried to point out theres a good reason people dont like/feel safe around endogenics#not cool! even when i was polite they STILL treated us bad! its no wonder some of the other pack members dislike that group!#not just because they compared something dumdum like syscourse to actual bigotry! now theyre making up bs and stalking vent blogs!#i tried to give the benefit of the doubt and be amicable i really did! but them calling a packmember something gross ruined that....im done#anyway i better get back to being the shining star of positivity before all these bad vibes cramp my style!#(might delete later)#btw im rblocking this post because i get a bad feeling theyre stalking me too and might try to start more problems if they can rb#and no blocking them wont stop them since we have reason to suspect theyre using an alt account to stalk our blogs
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my art will never be good enough !
#vent#im so hypocritical#i give advice on how to not feel terrible about ones own art and then i want to burn all my traditional art and delete all my art files#i cant even follow my own advice. ive wanted to burn and delete my art for several years now and i am very close to doing it#its so hard to not compare myself to others. its so hard to not think that what I make isn't good enough. everyone else can make so#much more beloved art. and they all know that ill never amount to anything no matter how much time ans effort i put jnto an art#it will never be good enough. I will never be good enough.#since I cant stop why dont I just post art then bounce and not scroll afterwards? ive done that multiple times now#but it feels very isolating and lonely. So I can deactivate and leave social media for good so I stop always comparing numbers#but it bleeds into real life. i actually felt this terrible about my art before creating any social media and posting my art in 2020.#i just know that nowhere am i good enough.#I hate that i think these things and am acting like this. I need to quit and discard everything giving up would benefit everyone#in fact why dont i go commit sewercide and officially rid myself since i cant think anything without wanting to commit over it lol#everyone says take a break but i will just come back feeling fine then it will quickly evolve into feeling this exact same way again.#'take a break' I might as well fucking quit for good like I want#making art makes me happy and helps keep me going. but at this point im not happy doing art anymore so I have nothing keeping me from#giving up on being alive anymnore
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As a Kpop fan now, if you've been here since at least 2021/2022ish~ you've outlived 2 apps. V Live and Universe, congrats, you don't get anything, but you can say you've outlived them.
#congrats on outliving two apps#rip universe app#rip vlive#the reason i say 2021 is because vlive has been dying since at least January 2021 - we no longer had vlive+ but i can't remember when#they deactivated that feature but wild#universe down#as a uni (ptg stan) this is the funniest tag i've gotten to say#i'd say dance on their graves but vlive was such a queen and we lost her- i loved her- she made my days easier... i would watch vlives in#class all the time- and now we can't- and we got so many good things from universe even if it didn't mean physical releases- it was still#nice- we had sth similar to bubble and we could talk to our idols ( i didn't do this but i loved seeing the translations on twt )#hybe is seeing each app as a cash grab and i cry sometimes- i can't forgive them- but anyways enough about that-#i feel like a fossil lowkey- it's not often i feel like a fossil in the kpop community but 8 yrs this year def takes a toll on your bones-#will i forever be keeping the uni app and vlive app? yes- they will forever live rent free- i will miss these eras as a kpop stan#achievement#outliving#congratulations#i've had this queued since feb. 17th when the messages from idols officially ended- it's so sad esp cause kyunbebes will have no access#to talking to him if starship finds a new way to make a new app because they won't include him 😭 i hope by the time this queues sony#comes up with a solution and treats our boy right- also ever think about all the idols that enlisted beforehand? like vlive died while they#were serving!? it's so sad- anyways i'm done rambling- pls enjoy this queued post#queued post#yes the app doesnt officially close til 5/31 @ 4 am et- but the messages being gone = huge loss#sorry besties- i seriously am gonna miss both apps i already grieved the former 😔
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Brain is rotating between depressing but bittersweet post-trimax one-shot, current wip chapter of itnl, playful horny Sentido sequel one-shot, and violent bloody itnl times to be had sooner than you think
Like the barrel of a gun. Click click click click spinning round and round. Which one am I gonna land on? Only time will tell.
#speculation nation#itnl shit#i did start writing chapter 14 today. finally.#like barely but it's a start.#but ive also been thinking about the post-trimax oneshot i wrote the intro for a month ago & havent written any since#but ALSO im thinking about smut. which i plan to write itnl side stories when that shit comes up#but it's gonna Be A While & i could theoretically do the sentido sequel oneshot WHENEVER i want#ive been waiting for ww to officially be in itnl so hes alive again. b4 i go back to sentido.#but i still have a while and i wanna write smut NOW!!!!!!!!#these 2 make me wanna start Chewing i swear#i also started thinking about blood. specifically vash covered in it.#which yeaaa yeaaa we have seen that already. kind of. but thats not the blood i want to see on him.#there's a difference between his blood and someone else's blood. his blood on him is natural. common. expected.#he's fine with it bc he's so fucking used to it.#now someone Else's blood? that's not as common. he avoids it at all cost. not bc of the blood itself#but rather its existence signifies his failure. to keep someone safe. to keep someone alive.#for him to be covered in someone else's blood he has to fail quite badly. and Boy do i have some immanent plans for that >:3c#all in all i am feeling Profoundly unhinged tonight. but in a creative sort of way.#unfortunately i dont have a brain for writing rn so none of it is being done. but i will do Something... later.#hopefully tomorrow. we'll see!
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/ Since I mention in my pinned post that this blog has some changes from canon, I'm going to make a rundown post that I'll be linking in my muse info on my blog. My timeline post covers some of this too and has other things canon to my muse that aren't here because they're timeline based and not direct changes based. I'll update this as needed.
Repede had another owner before Yuri got him in the game. I'm combining this with FS. Thus, Repede would have been basically an infant when he and Lambert ended up with the knights. From there he took to Yuri as he did in the FS drama CD so Yuri was primarily in charge of Repede during his stay with the knights, but he and Flynn raised Repede together as is in line with the game. This means they continued raising him together even after Yuri left.
In the JP version of the game, Yuri says he was with the knights for a short time but doesn't specify how long that time was, so I'm completely yeeting the "three months" dub aspect from this blog. I can't reasonably assume he signed up, took the exams, went into training, went from errand boy to battle status, then went on normal missions and left in the span of three months. So as usual, we're following the JP timeline. Generally anything the dub makes up or actively changes from the original context/tone gets yeeted here.
In the FS drama CD, Flynn is extremely repetitive about Yuri quitting the knights and with his nagging. At least with @mistralxsoul and anyone else who prefers it the following way in threads with my muse, we're toning it down because it just feels absolutely batshit to us how bad it is in the drama CD (it's worse than even the movie itself).
Since the timeline for Yuri and Flynn's knighthood conflicts super horrendously between the novel, FS/FS drama CD and the game, I'm mixing all of it together (primarily because I consider the novel more canon than the FS drama CD). Basically (for my muse), they signed their names and didn't take the exams immediately, but when they eventually did it was at least a couple years later, due to Yuri still having his teen appearance when he signed his name to join in the novel. This is because otherwise, if I average my muse's teen age out to be fifteen/sixteen and his age to be about eighteen/nineteen in the knights, it would mean he'd been with the knights (including training, etc) anywhere from 2-4 years if his sign up was immediately after the novel's events. If they were to sign up and join immediately after the novel timeline, it also makes even less sense because Flynn's attitude in FS and his relationship with Yuri (and remember, the FS drama CD comes before the movie's timeline and Flynn was even worse about Yuri's attitude in the CD) would seem like it literally 180'd overnight.
So basically, to avoid all this insanity, a short summarized timeline for my muse would be: they signed up but didn't join right away, Flynn moved away and was gone for a couple years or so after the events of the novel, both of them changed in personality/behavior drastically in that time, they met up at the exams, they went into training, they got sent to Niren's squad, they were more errand boys than actual knights when they were still super fresh newbies and Yuri was extremely annoyed with that, they were actual knights for a while (I'm going to say Yuri was a knight for at least six months or more, especially if I consider the trajectory of Flynn's behavior toward him in the drama CD through the end of FS), the events of FS were not one straight timeline and things happened between the days etc etc, then Yuri left.
Following the game's drama CDs, Yuri hesitated a lot more when Flynn was injured at Zaude. If not for Flynn nudging him to go after Alexei even while wounded, Yuri wouldn't have left him there.
Following the same drama CDs, it's Raven and Repede who find and look after Yuri when he wakes up after Zaude. That is to say, Repede was already with Raven and lunged when he sniffed out Yuri in his room (super doggo powers). Raven followed Repede in a panic, who ran to Yuri's room upon realizing Yuri was there, and Raven finds Yuri awake but right in the middle of passing back out (the sound is basically Raven's voice being distant with some ringing, so it's from Yuri's point of view that Raven is trying to get him to steady himself but he passes back out). Raven takes care of him from there until he's recovered properly enough to go back. In this time, Rita did investigating and eventually, with the others minus Raven, went to Zopheir after deciding they couldn't dawdle and just wait in their grief. While they're there, Yuri and Raven have headed out after them and show up together and reunite with the rest of the group. Raven has already been updated on what Yuri knows from Duke at this point (Duke saved him as usual, but the drama CD changes come in after that), so the two of them update everyone else.
In the game, there's a skit with Yuri, Flynn and Karol where Yuri mentions "playing in a river", but in the novel, they were actually getting water at the river and the other kids were playing in the river when they got attacked by a monster, fell into the river (Yuri also mentions (I thiiiink in another unrelated skit) that just falling into "a river" was enough to panic him), and Flynn grabbed onto a merman. For my muse, I'm just going with Yuri simplifying the situation to Karol while keeping the novel's event as my muse's canon.
#{ muse info + headcanons }#/ a lot of the timeline post itself is also for me and not y'all LOL but like. if you need to know#differences in interaction with me this stuff is good to know at least bc I don't strictly follow the game canon#I follow a mix of official content and obviously some of it overlaps and retcons other things#as for the dub if you've been here long enough y'all know I hold a huge ass grudge against#how much it changes Yuri's behavior/personality and his attitude toward Flynn#but the three months thing just does not feel reasonable to me on top of the dub just making it up#and it helps SO much to have that free time period for writing#even if we assume he wasn't counting the training to officially join the knights in the dub#three months is... way too short imo and then if I combine the FS drama CD with that#it makes even less sense bc the girls tried to get Yuri to stay when he did actually almost quit#on top of the whole not rly doing knightly things for a while at first#and yeahhhh it's just a fucking MESS to try to cram everything with all this content into three months#also like since I LOOOOVE the teen arc of the novel and that's My Fucking Baby Boy#I don't want to actually change anything from it so I'm just mixing everything together to keep it all#it's like... I love all the official Yuri content and so I want to keep as much of it together as possible#but since it's not always the same people working on the content or bc there's such a time gap between content#things aren't always consistent and when it comes to writing a muse I just. NEED timeline consistency#even if I have to make it myself LMAO. I try to keep as much of the game stuff together as possible#since I know most ppl interacting with me only know the game and possibly the movie#and not all the drama CDs and all the various JP exclusive content#but it's hard to keep it together perfectly when there's so much other content I'm using that has formed my muse#like... my muse exists the way he is bc of all this content you know? and only using the game#would change him a fucking lot in hindsight with the way he thinks and reacts and such#like... there's no fucking way he's not traumatized after the events of the novel in the teen arc there's NO fucking way#it was bad enough that it nearly pushed him to murder when he was a teenager#and he might have actually done it if his foster mother didn't stop him (and end up doing it herself)#so yeah I mean... I do my best to keep him within game context with most people I interact with#but the more you interact with this boy the deeper you're gonna get into muse specific lore lol
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