#lovequalities

[motivatedmindmastery]

Unlocking True Love: 7 Qualities Every Boy Should Have! #4 is the Key to a Lasting Connection! 💑

[beforeamore]

How do you know if it's true love? Is this "the one?"

Join BeforeAmore in uncovering the 8 qualities of true love, and how you can know if you've met your soulmate.

[delphiniumjoy]

You’ve heard of hopeless romantic? I’m a hopeless platonic

[aro-absol]

You know what I like so much about the aromantic community?

We have so many concepts that the average alloromantic person has never heard of. Concepts that make it so much easier to explain our experiences, desires and struggles to other people. They make it so much easier to exist as an aromantic person in this world. Of course, every aromantic person can decide whether they find these concepts helpful and applicable to their experiences. But I find it amazing how many cool concepts the aromantic community either came up with or took pre-existing concepts and made them our aromantic 101. I don't think the allos really get how being aromantic can fundamentally change your worldview. And to be honest, I think they're missing out because I think everyone would benefit from at least being familiar with those concepts.

Being aromantic is basically like this:

Aromantic shrimp colours are real.

Anyways, aromantic community, y'all mean a lot to me and I'm so happy I found y'all and now share your "secret" knowledge!

[st-ivangeline]

Big aro thought:

If you figure out you’re grayromantic or demiromantic or aroflux/fluid etc etc and you feel like you have to give up the label aromantic because you experience

You Don’t

You can use the term aromantic forever even if you use a microlabel, if you’re in the aromantic community you can use the term aromantic, and it doesn’t even have to be as a umbrella label, if you feel more connected to being aromantic then you can use that label, you can use both your microlabel and aromantic or one or the other, you’re still aromantic and part of the aromantic community whatever arospec label you use—fight me on it

[aro-barrel]

one of the first things any aro wants to know on their journey of discovery is, “what the fuck is romantic love?” so we end up reading alloromantic accounts of romance, just so we can try to understand. and it’s often a failed journey, simply because people describe different experiences or describe sensations that don’t necessarily equate to romantic attraction. sure, people get a warm fuzzy feeling when they look at their spouse, but alloplatonics might describe their platonic feelings the same. and sure, people are struck with a desire to hold someone close and kiss them, but is that really exclusive to romance? after a while, it becomes clear. love filled with subjectivity.

the question then becomes, what do we do with subjectivity? it’s the first step in disassembling "love." when we choose to investigate further, we may come to realize the subjectivities are (too often) conveniently erased to suit popular notions of love—these stem from dominant depictions of love that don’t reflect reality or practice. put simply: people are told how their love is. yes, they're told how to love, but there is the very real assumption that the same feelings underlie every expression of romantic love, no matter who you are. it's in all the tv shows and books, it's parroted by well-meaning people who wish for your happiness, it's sliced ragged until it's a narrow, "correct" form. but no one loves that singular way, even if they warp their own experiences to fit the narrative. if "love" is pared down, concentrated into an impossibly specific expression, we get awful tunnel vision when we try to conceptualize it. the lived, subjective experiences of love elude us.

so as aromantics, we take the abandoned subjectivities and play around with them. we might attempt to separate components of "love" and poke them with a stick, dissect them, take parts out, Frankenstein them. we might heave "love" into a jumbo garbage bin forever or build our own thing from scratch. when people write of love as a law of nature, we tear it to fucking shreds. there are no rules, it's not a sacred thing, not immutable. we fuck around with "love" on purpose. we carve our own space in a society that insists on myopia.

[skittlespizza]

Happy pride month to unconventional connections, friendships or relationships. Shoutout to fwbs and qprs and unlabeled relationships shoutout to friendships or acquaintances shoutout to that one duo who borders platonic and romantic/sexual or all of the in-betweeens. Shoutout to all those who decide not to label things and shoutout to lovequeers and those who dont give a fuck :)

[swordsandflowercrowns]

I was explaining this to a friend recently and I think it's an important distinction to make: not all queerplatonic relationships look the same.

A good way I've found to illustrate what exactly a qpr is, is to say "a qpr is to relationships what nonbinary is to gender". While both of these traditionally function on a binary (male/female, platonic/romantic), by defining our personal outlooks and experiences of the concepts of gender and relationships with new terms, we challenge the boundaries that society has put in place.

And yes, whilst redefining what actually constitutes romantic or platonic relationships, or male and female identities, and what makes them different (and acknowledging where they overlap, or where they can expand past what we traditionally expect) is important to increasing our understanding, so is providing options entirely outside of those two boxes.

And that's what it is - options. It's very easy to trivialise the concept of nonbinary and simply make gender into a trinary, rather than a binary. Male/female/nonbinary, which goes against the very purpose of the nonbinary label. This further erases the spectrum of gender. It's the same with relationships - by giving a strict set of instructions on how a qpr must look and act, you are simply creating a trinary. The point of the concept of qprs is to acknowledge that there are relationships between people that may overlap platonic and romantic, or fall partially within one and partially outside, or ones that are entirely separate from either category.

There are an infinite amount of ways a relationship can manifest, and if the people in the relationship feel that queerplatonic best describes their partnership without romance, or their affection without commitment, or their feelings towards each other that aren't quite what romantic or platonic is to them, or any other reason that rebels against amatonormativity, then they can choose to use that term. Queerplatonic covers the widest range of relationships that come in all shapes and sizes.

I think it's so important when discussing topics like relationships and gender to consciously make the effort to keep queering our ideas of the concepts - to remember that a spectrum is a spectrum. Labels can be useful for finding community, identifying your experiences and validating your struggles, but as soon as you try to start hyper-defining them, you lose the radical nature of queering our understanding of ourselves and our relationships. We name these concepts in order to give a voice to our subversion of society's arbitrary rules and expectations, not to police each other into conforming to a particular understanding of how a person (with a certain label) "should" act or be.

[mossy-aro]

i hate to be a Downer but no i don’t think making the tenth generic post abt how ‘true love’ is and always will be the most powerful force in the universe and that nothing else compares gives you a personality actually. sorry.

[ayspec]

i love being aplatonic!! i love being aromantic!! i love being asexual!! i love being asensual!! i love being simultaneously lovequeer and loveless and arolovic!! i love defying what’s expected of me!! i love looking at amanormativity and spitting in its eye and kicking it in the balls and watching it fall to the ground as i beat it with a stick!! i love being alive and happy and queer and weird and free!! and i hope aspecs everywhere learn to embrace their identities and be happy with who they are too <2

[sallertiafabrica]

When your love is insignificant.

A comic about my relationship with love as an aromantic and low-empathy person.

Just for context: I was having an aro anguish moment in the middle of the night, woke up and couldn’t sleep again, wrote out this poem-thingy so it’d leave my head, fell asleep again, then proceeded to work on this comic all day this evening, cuz I wanted to do an aro comic for the longest so might as well turn my night-anguish-induced-poem into one.

[117-opossum-teeth]

<2 hand symbol anyone ??

[actuallysafe-for-aro]

I've had 3 people this week do that "buuuut love isn't All ROMANTIC, people have other types of love "

And I'm so sick and tired of this! Fuck you! You don't get to decide what experiences are universal, you don't get to decide what words and concepts people are and aren't comfortable with and do or don't believe in.

I don't care! It's not all love, love isn't what makes someone human, love is not the most important thing, you can go fuck yourself if you think so.

Aros, especially loveless, aplatonic, and lovequeer aros deserve to have their perception of the world respected by other people. We should not have our ideals questioned and told they are straight up wrong or untrue. No one can speak for you on your own experiences and the language that feels good to you.

Aros are important, we deserve respect

[st-ivangeline]

aromantic talking:

in the song my love mine all mine by mitski i genuinely kid you not thought she was talking about the concept of love and how she had the power to use it however she likes but i just realized that was Big Aro Dumb of me and that when she sings “My love..” she’s referring to a person and i just aksnfjrkrks

[aromantic-diaries]

Aros who reject the idea of love altogehter & aros who redefine what love means to them are both fucking stellar.

[enbeemagical]

normalize being a little bit in love with your friends

normalize being not at all in love with anything

normalize love being confusing and weird as hell

normalize love not being romantic

normalize love not being

normalize not loving

normalize loving in the wrong way

just. normalize being unapologetically yourself