#little miss optimism

[crescentfool]

happy mochizuki monday!!!

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

they call me the griever because halfway through a thing I enjoy I’m already sad that it’s closer to being over

[kubota-crackhead]

gaaru

[windor-truffle]

"Yup, I'm right here! See, you can touch me and everything!"

--

Richard and Pascal friendship is something I didn't know I needed to write

[akkivee]

this could have been rei but he waxes 😔

[arcadian-vampire]

Thinking abt the time I was doing my makeup in the mirror, and paused like 'wait this looks familiar, who do I remind myself of'

It was Howl Smovingcastle. I looked like Howl Smovingcastle

[staff]

Tumblr’s Core Product Strategy

Here at Tumblr, we’ve been working hard on reorganizing how we work in a bid to gain more users. A larger user base means a more sustainable company, and means we get to stick around and do this thing with you all a bit longer. What follows is the strategy we're using to accomplish the goal of user growth. The @labs group has published a bit already, but this is bigger. We’re publishing it publicly for the first time, in an effort to work more transparently with all of you in the Tumblr community. This strategy provides guidance amid limited resources, allowing our teams to focus on specific key areas to ensure Tumblr’s future.

The Diagnosis

In order for Tumblr to grow, we need to fix the core experience that makes Tumblr a useful place for users. The underlying problem is that Tumblr is not easy to use. Historically, we have expected users to curate their feeds and lean into curating their experience. But this expectation introduces friction to the user experience and only serves a small portion of our audience. 

Tumblr’s competitive advantage lies in its unique content and vibrant communities. As the forerunner of internet culture, Tumblr encompasses a wide range of interests, such as entertainment, art, gaming, fandom, fashion, and music. People come to Tumblr to immerse themselves in this culture, making it essential for us to ensure a seamless connection between people and content. 

To guarantee Tumblr’s continued success, we’ve got to prioritize fostering that seamless connection between people and content. This involves attracting and retaining new users and creators, nurturing their growth, and encouraging frequent engagement with the platform.

Our Guiding Principles

To enhance Tumblr’s usability, we must address these core guiding principles.

Expand the ways new users can discover and sign up for Tumblr.

Provide high-quality content with every app launch.

Facilitate easier user participation in conversations.

Retain and grow our creator base.

Create patterns that encourage users to keep returning to Tumblr.

Improve the platform’s performance, stability, and quality.

Below is a deep dive into each of these principles.

Principle 1: Expand the ways new users can discover and sign up for Tumblr.

Tumblr has a “top of the funnel” issue in converting non-users into engaged logged-in users. We also have not invested in industry standard SEO practices to ensure a robust top of the funnel. The referral traffic that we do get from external sources is dispersed across different pages with inconsistent user experiences, which results in a missed opportunity to convert these users into regular Tumblr users. For example, users from search engines often land on pages within the blog network and blog view—where there isn’t much of a reason to sign up. 

We need to experiment with logged-out tumblr.com to ensure we are capturing the highest potential conversion rate for visitors into sign-ups and log-ins. We might want to explore showing the potential future user the full breadth of content that Tumblr has to offer on our logged-out pages. We want people to be able to easily understand the potential behind Tumblr without having to navigate multiple tabs and pages to figure it out. Our current logged-out explore page does very little to help users understand “what is Tumblr.” which is a missed opportunity to get people excited about joining the site.

Actions & Next Steps

Improving Tumblr’s search engine optimization (SEO) practices to be in line with industry standards.

Experiment with logged out tumblr.com to achieve the highest conversion rate for sign-ups and log-ins, explore ways for visitors to “get” Tumblr and entice them to sign up.

Principle 2: Provide high-quality content with every app launch.

We need to ensure the highest quality user experience by presenting fresh and relevant content tailored to the user’s diverse interests during each session. If the user has a bad content experience, the fault lies with the product.

The default position should always be that the user does not know how to navigate the application. Additionally, we need to ensure that when people search for content related to their interests, it is easily accessible without any confusing limitations or unexpected roadblocks in their journey.

Being a 15-year-old brand is tough because the brand carries the baggage of a person’s preconceived impressions of Tumblr. On average, a user only sees 25 posts per session, so the first 25 posts have to convey the value of Tumblr: it is a vibrant community with lots of untapped potential. We never want to leave the user believing that Tumblr is a place that is stale and not relevant. 

Actions & Next Steps

Deliver great content each time the app is opened.

Make it easier for users to understand where the vibrant communities on Tumblr are. 

Improve our algorithmic ranking capabilities across all feeds. 

Principle 3: Facilitate easier user participation in conversations.

Part of Tumblr’s charm lies in its capacity to showcase the evolution of conversations and the clever remarks found within reblog chains and replies. Engaging in these discussions should be enjoyable and effortless.

Unfortunately, the current way that conversations work on Tumblr across replies and reblogs is confusing for new users. The limitations around engaging with individual reblogs, replies only applying to the original post, and the inability to easily follow threaded conversations make it difficult for users to join the conversation.

Actions & Next Steps

Address the confusion within replies and reblogs.

Improve the conversational posting features around replies and reblogs. 

Allow engagements on individual replies and reblogs.

Make it easier for users to follow the various conversation paths within a reblog thread. 

Remove clutter in the conversation by collapsing reblog threads. 

Explore the feasibility of removing duplicate reblogs within a user’s Following feed. 

Principle 4: Retain and grow our creator base.

Creators are essential to the Tumblr community. However, we haven’t always had a consistent and coordinated effort around retaining, nurturing, and growing our creator base.  

Being a new creator on Tumblr can be intimidating, with a high likelihood of leaving or disappointment upon sharing creations without receiving engagement or feedback. We need to ensure that we have the expected creator tools and foster the rewarding feedback loops that keep creators around and enable them to thrive.

The lack of feedback stems from the outdated decision to only show content from followed blogs on the main dashboard feed (“Following”), perpetuating a cycle where popular blogs continue to gain more visibility at the expense of helping new creators. To address this, we need to prioritize supporting and nurturing the growth of new creators on the platform.

It is also imperative that creators, like everyone on Tumblr, feel safe and in control of their experience. Whether it be an ask from the community or engagement on a post, being successful on Tumblr should never feel like a punishing experience.

Actions & Next Steps

Get creators’ new content in front of people who are interested in it. 

Improve the feedback loop for creators, incentivizing them to continue posting.

Build mechanisms to protect creators from being spammed by notifications when they go viral.

Expand ways to co-create content, such as by adding the capability to embed Tumblr links in posts.

Principle 5: Create patterns that encourage users to keep returning to Tumblr.

Push notifications and emails are essential tools to increase user engagement, improve user retention, and facilitate content discovery. Our strategy of reaching out to you, the user, should be well-coordinated across product, commercial, and marketing teams.

Our messaging strategy needs to be personalized and adapt to a user’s shifting interests. Our messages should keep users in the know on the latest activity in their community, as well as keeping Tumblr top of mind as the place to go for witty takes and remixes of the latest shows and real-life events.  

Most importantly, our messages should be thoughtful and should never come across as spammy.  

Actions & Next Steps

Conduct an audit of our messaging strategy.

Address the issue of notifications getting too noisy; throttle, collapse or mute notifications where necessary.  

Identify opportunities for personalization within our email messages. 

Test what the right daily push notification limit is. 

Send emails when a user has push notifications switched off.

Principle 6: Performance, stability and quality.

The stability and performance of our mobile apps have declined. There is a large backlog of production issues, with more bugs created than resolved over the last 300 days. If this continues, roughly one new unresolved production issue will be created every two days. Apps and backend systems that work well and don't crash are the foundation of a great Tumblr experience. Improving performance, stability, and quality will help us achieve sustainable operations for Tumblr.

Improve performance and stability: deliver crash-free, responsive, and fast-loading apps on Android, iOS, and web.

Improve quality: deliver the highest quality Tumblr experience to our users. 

Move faster: provide APIs and services to unblock core product initiatives and launch new features coming out of Labs.

Conclusion

Our mission has always been to empower the world’s creators. We are wholly committed to ensuring Tumblr evolves in a way that supports our current users while improving areas that attract new creators, artists, and users. You deserve a digital home that works for you. You deserve the best tools and features to connect with your communities on a platform that prioritizes the easy discoverability of high-quality content. This is an invigorating time for Tumblr, and we couldn’t be more excited about our current strategy.

[r0semultiverse]

I know my IronNinja challenge may take a lot of time but it’s a fun hang out game & also a rage game all at the same time lol

[invinciblerodent]

yknow why not, have two more good Dorians, I think we all deserve it

(........... I literally just noticed that the beard stops halfway along his jaw. oh babe, your artful face-fuzz really never does disappoint.)

!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

..... but on a coherent note, while the style of the visuals in this game is a bit different from Inquisition's (and therefore the returning characters also look and move different), I think this is a nice, and effective redesign. I like it.

Yes, it is different, but it's still undeniably Dorian.

He's just... no longer in his early thirties, but he's visibly a 40-year-old man, with the smile lines and forehead-creases that come with that.

There are deeper creases in the corners of his eye when he smiles now, he wears his hair and facial hair different (I'm not sure about those brows baby, but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't the same exact shape as his original brow, only darker), and he dresses according to different fashions now. But, I like how the elements of the design stayed: the asymmetric capelet-thing, the leather straps across his chest look straight up like they were lifted from Inquisition (I've been collecting some shots of assets that look like they're from Inquisition, they make me smile, I might post a little compilation later), and the snake-headed clasp also looks very familiar.

I originally clipped this shot because of the excellent stankface, but it's also showing the outfit pretty nicely:

I also grabbed this one really quickly, to show that his boots are also very similar to the ones he wore in Inquisition:

Overall, honestly, though the clothing feels a bit bulkier and more bottom-heavy in Veilguard than it does in Inquisition in general, this is not really that much different from his original design. It's an updated, slightly more modest version of his Inquisition look, with robes that are a bit less open, flare out less and have tighter sleeves that cover more skin, which is, yeah, more suitable for a respected Magister than the threads of the rebel Altus.

crying, welcome back baby boy I missed you these past years ya sweet sweet man, you've done so much growing i'm so proud of you, now let's introduce you to an iron because boy those robes are creased at the bottom

(the only unrealistic thing is that this man can shut up about his husband-in-all-but-the-legal-sense for more than two seconds, really)

[bettys-redwinesupernova]

I’M NOT HIM

rafe cameron x fem!reader

( mood board does NOT depict readers appearance !! )

SUMMARY: in which rafe snaps at reader during a heated argument and she flinches, her past trauma resurfacing. rafe breaking the main promise he made to her: to not be anything like her father.

based on an ask i got that i lost </3 i hope the anon who requested it finds this, and this its what you asked for! i’m a little rusty with one-shots so just a short one to ease me into things again! :)

WARNINGS: angst to fluff, arguing, cursing, mentions of past childhood abuse (reader), mentions of a gun/brief mention of violence, trauma responses, crying. (lmk if i missed anything!!)

WORD COUNT: 900 words

THIRD PERSON +

Rafe Cameron wasn’t the kind of man anyone would describe as soft. Not with the sharp edge in his voice, the perpetual storm behind his ocean eyes, and the way his knuckles bore scars from fights he barely remembered. He had spent his life battling demons, most of them inherited from Ward Cameron, and those fights had shaped him into someone who took no prisoners.

But with Y/N, none of that mattered.

Y/N was everything Rafe wasn’t—gentle, warm, full of an optimism he couldn’t begin to understand but adored nonetheless. She radiated light, the kind that made him want to shield her from the darkness in himself. For two years, she’d been his anchor, the one person who saw past the volatile exterior to the man buried beneath. And for two years, Rafe had promised himself that he would never hurt her.

But promises don’t always hold in the heat of the moment.

The argument had started over something Y/N had brought up before: the gun in Rafe’s apartment. She hated it, hated what it represented, and hated the memories it dragged up for her.

“Rafe, I told you,” she said, her voice quiet but firm. “I don’t feel safe with it here. Please.”

Rafe, already wound tight from dealing with his father’s latest scheme and the growing weight of “the business,” felt his patience snap like a rubber band stretched too far.

“It’s not a big deal, Y/N,” he muttered, pacing the living room. “It’s not like I’m walking around with it in my hand. It’s locked up, alright? Just drop it.”

Y/N didn’t drop it. She rarely did when something mattered to her. “It is a big deal, Rafe. I asked you to get rid of it. I thought you understood how—”

“I said fucking drop it!” Rafe’s voice thundered through the room, loud enough to make the walls seem smaller.

The words echoed in the sudden silence, bouncing off the tension between them. Rafe froze, immediately regretting the way he’d shouted, but it was too late.

Y/N stood there, trembling, her wide eyes glassy with unshed tears. Her lip wobbled as she tried to hold herself together, but Rafe saw the cracks forming.

“Baby…” he said softly, taking a step toward her, reaching out his hand.

She flinched. Actually flinched.

It was like a knife to his chest, sharp and unrelenting. He knew her past—knew about her father’s temper and the way it had scarred her. He knew that shouting brought her back to those dark, suffocating memories.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, his voice thick with panic. He reached out again, but she backed away, tears spilling down her cheeks.

“I—I can’t,” she choked out before rushing to the bedroom and shutting the door behind her.

Rafe rushed after her before collapsing onto the floor, pressing his back against the wall beside the bedroom door. He could hear her quiet sobs on the other side, each one driving the guilt deeper into his chest.

He buried his face in his hands. “I’m so sorry, baby” he murmured, voice breaking. “I didn’t mean it. I didn’t mean to scare you. Please, just… let me make it right.”

Her sobs continued, muffled but heartbreaking. Rafe rested his head against the door, tears streaming down his face. He could picture her inside, curled up in the corner, just like she used to do as a little girl to shield herself from her father’s rage. A place he promised her she wouldn't ever have to go back to.

“I’m not him,” he whispered, as much to himself as to her. “I’ll never be him. I swear. I’ll never hurt you.”

Minutes turned into half an hour, but Rafe didn’t move. He felt he didn’t deserve to move.

When the door finally opened, Rafe almost didn’t notice at first. He’d been staring at the floor, lost in the heaviness of his own shame. But then Y/N was there, stepping out quietly and kneeling beside him.

Without a word, she crawled into his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck and burying her face in his shoulder. Her touch was tentative, as if she wasn’t entirely sure she could trust it yet, but Rafe held her like she was the only thing keeping him alive.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered over and over, his voice cracking as he clung to her. “I didn’t mean it. I swear, Y/N/N. I’m so sorry.”

Y/N didn’t respond right away. She just held him, letting his warmth chase away the cold that had settled in her chest. Eventually, she pulled back just enough to look at him, her tear-streaked face breaking his heart all over again.

“Please don’t yell at me like that again,” she said softly, her voice trembling.

Rafe cupped her face gently, his thumb brushing away her tears. “I won’t,” he promised, his tone fierce with conviction. “Never again. I’ll get rid of the gun. I’ll do whatever it takes to make this right. Just… don’t be afraid of me.”

“I’m not afraid of you,” Y/N said, her voice barely audible. “I’m afraid of the person you might become.”

Rafe nodded, the weight of her words sinking deep. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, holding her tightly again. “I’ll be better,” he whispered. “For you, I’ll be better.”

In that moment, Rafe vowed to prove it. Not with words, but with actions—starting with the gun.

(dividers by @kodaswrld <3)

betty’s notes ˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊

ahhhh my first one-shot in FOREVER :’) it’s a short one and really sad and angsty but it felt like the quickest ask to whip out, and angst is easier for me to write atm :)

i’m so excited to start with the other requests, and please don’t stop requesting! i plan on writing most stuff 1,500 words +, this was just a short little ask so please request with as MUCH detail as possible <3

master list will be updated soon! but for now, to keep track of my works check my personalised tags that are below such as: #bettys asks!! ౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ and #bettys work!! ౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ or my personalised tags for characters !!

[cursedyuri]

modern!vi who’s down horrendous for you. she gets home from the gym, sweat-damp and sore, ready for a much-needed shower after hitting a new pr and kicking her own ass during her workout. she’s undressing in the foggy bathroom when her phone pings from the counter, your name lighting up the screen. she tosses her shirt to the side and unlocks the phone to see your message.

missing you sooo bad right now, you’ve texted her. attached is a photo of you, shirtless, with your perfectly manicured nails delicately cupping your tits. might have to touch myself… help me out?

vi scoffs at your message, but she clicks on that photo again, zooms in and analyzes it until she’s sure she’s memorized every individual pixel.

fuck, you’re perfect. fuck fuck fuck.

steam from the shower has fogged up the mirror entirely, and it’s deathly humid in the bathroom. but vi’s got a soft spot for you - she’d do anything you asked her to, even if your version of asking is merely suggesting… no, bribing. that photo was definitely a bribe.

vi messes around with a few potential angles, propping her phone up on the counter, then on the floor, even on the back of the toilet. nothing looks right, and she’s so sweaty and frustrated that she almost decides not to send you anything at all. she rips open the shower curtain, huffing an annoyed sigh before her eyes land on the shower head.

huh, that’s an idea.

fifteen minutes later, as you’re lazily dragging your fingers through your cunt, horny and annoyed that vi hasn’t texted you back, you get a notification. it’s a video, you realize with a giddy whir of excitement, and you click play without a second thought. one hand cradling your phone, the other between your thighs, you watch as vi settles the camera down on a shelf by the window. her scarlet locks are damp with sweat, droplets of water from the shower rolling down her inked skin. fuck, you’ll never get used to that body - she’s all lean muscles and sharp edges, so dangerous until she’s holding you with those calloused hands and curling her frame up against yours.

and now? she’s biting her lip, trying to make a show of trailing a hand down her abdomen - she stops short, though, reaching off to the side instead. her hand returns with the running shower head, and you draw in a sharp, excited breath. as if she could hear you, vi lets out a little chuckle and says, “i know, unexpected. i haven’t done this in years.”

she fiddles with the shower head, flicking a switch at the neck until the water flow changes to a more… optimal setting. the stream’s a lot more focused now, more intense.

“worked myself up a bit before this. hope that’s okay, princess.” vi flashes a smirk at the camera, but with her cheeks painted that pretty pink shade, you know she’s a little embarrassed. uncertain.

you’re grateful that the camera angle lets you see every detail of what vi’s doing - how her body moves. she hitches a leg up against the shower wall, just high enough to spread herself open. the soft curls between her legs are untamed and wet, and your cunt twitches at the sight of vi’s pink, pink cunt, spread beautifully - you only get one glance, though, before the silver shower head blocks your view. vi hisses through her teeth and her hips twitch. you sigh, your fingers playing in the wetness between your legs as you watch vi toss her head back in pleasure. every moan that passes her lips goes straight to your clit - you’re needy, gushing wetter every time you see vi’s tits bounce or her jaw clench.

“fuuuuck,” she cries out, her face a vision of pleasure. mouth hung open, brows knitted together, eyes foggy with lust. “gonna come, shit, baby…”

water drips from vi’s hair down to her shoulders, rolling in beads down her tense chest. she’s heaving, panting, gasping your name as her orgasm slams into her, tatted biceps flexing as she forces the shower head to stay in place. her orgasm seems to last forever, streams of water gushing from her pussy down to the shower floor - and then she’s done, spent.

it’s almost like vi forgets about the camera for a moment. she hums in pleasure, still panting a bit as she comes back down from her high. she licks her lips, then her eyes meet the camera - and oh, she looks wrecked.

“hope that’s enough material for you, pretty girl,” she says to the camera, winking playfully before the video cuts out.

[its-wabby-stuff]

Ugh the pain. This is so good though.

AU: what if Donnie and Raph were the only brothers who survived the apocalypse?

I totally didn't draw a 7 page comic just because I had this idea of the final 2 pages stuck inside my head.

[prettycottagequeer]

ok maybe I'm a little late to this BUT I'm gonna do a to-do list motivation thingy because I've had the worst two weeks since I started college :)

SO these I should start on asap:

50 I make the snack I really want but I haven't had the motivation to make

100 I clean my dorm. another thing I've been meaning to do for a week

150 I do the presentation about mid-victorian fashion I've been putting off (due Monday)

200 I start memorizing the monologue that was due a week ago (now due Tuesday)

these can wait longer:

300 I spend time outside. It's so nice but I'm getting stuck scrolling because I feel like shit. vicious cycle ect

500 I start setting a better weekend routine (aka getting up before noon)

1k I start working out again. I was doing a routine to get more masc and build muscle and I liked it but life hit me like Crowley driving the Bentley and I've missed like 3 weeks

2k I buy my first binder. I've been coping with sports bras for almost a year now and I haven't been able to justify spending $50+ on a binder even though I know I'd love it and use it everyday.

Do I tag people? I don't know but I'm going to. @the-globe-theatre-maggot @weirdly-specific-but-ok @howmanyholesinswisscheese

here's just some context if you want to read, feel free to skip. some of this I've talked about in the maggot server, some I haven't, but I really just need a place for this to go that's out of my head. tw homophobia, transphobia, car crash(??)

How I Have Been Run Over By The Bentley Going 90 In Central London What Feels Like 50 Times In The Last Two Weeks

I'm going to college about 4 hours away from my parents, and it's been really nice. They.. suck, to say the least. transphobic/homophobic ect, super traditional conservative catholic, racist, all of it. so i tried to move somewhere where I wouldn't have to think about them and I could be myself and do what I can to be happy. March 1st was the start of my spring break, which meant going home because the dorms close. I was already not excited, but I was prepared. the problem with being away from home is I forget just how bad they are. My optimism gets the better of me and I think maybe this time they'll be better. so I decided to not hide my septum piercing.

that was a mistake. it starts a whole fight where they say we know you're trans, you're actually a girl and you always will be, we have the bones argument, they think I'm being influenced by demons or something (if only they knew about crowley) because I want to change my name, and they tell me that going on t will completely ruin my body and give me cancer and other things. They're also mad about my dyed hair, septum, and general style, and say I'm setting a terrible example for my (5) younger siblings and make it a point to tell me just how much of a disappointment I am. I think I'm pretty cute and fun but y'know, whatever. very fun time. I lie so much, don't give them any more details about my identity, and say I'm not planning to go on t to save my ass. which is all on instinct which makes me feel worse because if I'm really trans I should be able to stand up for that, right? maybe I'm faking the dysphoria.

the next morning I wake up really sick, and spend the rest of the week sick and feeling like shit because I'm home and back in the same place and situation I was a year ago that I thought I escaped. at one point I pretty much lose my voice but also kind of get gender euphoria from it. it's weird.

On Friday it's time for me to drive back 4 hours to school, and I make it about 3/4 of the way when google maps takes me on a random gravel road and I crash my car, really crash my car, like sideways-in-a-ditch-windows-broken-crawling-up-out-the-door crash it in the middle of nowhere. (I was fully paying attention to the road, it was raining and super slick) I call my parents because I have no one else to call and I sit in a Subway for 3 hours while they drive to get my car. when they get there they're (understandably) really mad, and they tell me that I'm not mature enough to be going to school so far away and I need to get my shit together and stop depending on them. which. is probably true. but made me feel even more stupid about the fact that I crashed my car. I get back to school and I'm still Very Sick with no energy or motivation to do anything. So I've spent the last week trying to get better and honestly to do anything. it hasn't really worked. I'm a lot better health-wise (Not emotionally), still sick but I have a lot of work due, so I really need a push to get started

[dreamescapeswriting]

Exposed ~ BC

‧₊˚ ☽ ⋅WORD COUNT: 3.4

‧₊˚ ☽ ⋅PAIRING: Chan x reader

‧₊˚ ☽ ⋅GENRE: established relationship, angst, soft ending, chan being protective boyfriend, your relationship is leaked,

‧₊˚ ☽ ⋅Copyright: © DreamEscapesWriting - October 2024

‧₊˚ ☽ ⋅MASTERLIST

It started off like any other day. Everything felt normal when you woke up, you and Chan had kissed goodbye like you did every single day before work and everything had been as it should have.

The usual hum of the office buzzed around you, and you sat at your desk with a smile, still laughing with your colleagues about a ridiculous moment that happened during the morning meeting.

“I can’t believe he actually said that,” you chuckled, glancing at your friend across the desk. You couldn't believe one of the interns had taken over the meeting after your boss had left, acting as though he'd know exactly what he was talking about... newsflash...he didn't.

“Does he even know what ‘synergy’ means?” you giggled a little and your friend, Sarah, shook her head, trying to keep her laughter under control.

“He’s just throwing words around to sound smart. I thought we were all going to lose it when he started talking about optimizing our optimized optimizations.” The two of you burst into laughter again, drawing curious glances from the people nearby, glares soon followed and you rolled your eyes. It was one of those lighthearted mornings—work felt manageable, and the little stresses of life were nowhere to be found.

Even your secret life with Chan didn’t feel overwhelming today, sometimes it felt hard to hide that part of your life from everyone you knew at work. But for nearly four years, you had both kept your relationship perfectly hidden, enjoying your time together away from prying eyes. You didn't care that you had to hide it, you understood why since life with an idol wasn't going to be all it was made out to be in the fanfictions you sometimes found yourself reading.

"Poor thing, maybe we should invite him to lunch though, just so we don't make him feel isolated," you told her as she nodded along with you. The last thing you wanted was to be mean to someone who clearly was trying his best here.

Soon the laughter died down, and you leaned back in your chair, reaching for your coffee. It was still warm—just the way you liked it. Everything felt routine. Normal.

But normal didn’t last.

Your phone, sitting innocuously beside your keyboard, buzzed once. Then again. And again. It wasn't like you to get so many notifications unless your friend was off from work and spammed you with reels so you bit down on your lip. You weren't exactly allowed your phone out so you glanced at it briefly, expecting a couple of messages from Chan or maybe a group chat blowing up. But the notifications were relentless.

Your brow furrowed as you picked up the phone. Your heart skipped a beat when you saw the flood of messages—dozens of notifications on social media, texts from unknown numbers, and even missed calls. Confusion turned to panic as you scrolled through the chaos, trying to make sense of it all.

“What’s wrong?” Sarah asked, noticing the sudden change in your expression. Before you could answer, another notification popped up on your screen—a tagged post from one of Chan’s members. Your stomach dropped as you read the caption:

CHANGBIN(jutdwae): "Congratulations on four years! You two deserve all the happiness."

You blinked, reading it again to make sure you weren’t imagining things. Not only was there the captain and tag of your Instagram there were countless images of you and Chan together.

No, this couldn’t be happening. It had to be a mistake. But the fans knew. They had pieced it together. The relationship you had kept under wraps for years was now out there for the world to see.

Your phone was going insane and there was no way you were going to be able to get into contact with Chan at this rate so you slid the phone into DND mode.

“I—uh, I have to go,” you mumbled, standing up from your desk, but your legs felt weak, your mind racing. There was no way this was happening, Changbin was usually more careful than this. What was he thinking?!

Your coworkers had started to murmur, glancing at their own phones, probably seeing the same posts and comments. Some of them gave you sympathetic looks, others were confused, staring at you to make sure that you were the person you claimed to be.

"Yn, wait." Sarah sounded panicked as she walked with you, holding your lower back as she shook her head at you,

"What's wrong-" That’s when you noticed it. Outside, through the wide office windows, a crowd had gathered. A large one. The people were holding their phones, taking pictures, pointing. You could hear the muffled sounds of their voices growing louder.

Oh no.

“Y/N, talk to me...What’s going on?” Sarah asked, standing beside you, worry etched into her features. You swallowed the lump in your throat, Sarah knew you were seeing someone you couldn't talk about...someone well-known in the media but she'd respected you when you couldn't tell her who.

“Fans,” you whispered, unable to tear your eyes away from the window. You had no idea how you were even going to get out of there with that mess building up outside.

“They know. About me and Chan.” Sarah’s eyes widened in shock at the name. She opened her mouth to say something, but the words were drowned out by the sudden realization that the fans weren’t just outside—they were here for you and clearly weren't just going to walk away anytime soon.

Your phone rang suddenly, startling you out of your daze. It was Chan. Thanks to him being in your favourites he was the only number able to get through to you,

“Y/N! Are you okay? I’m so, so sorry. I swear we’re trying to fix this,” his voice was panicked, almost breathless. You knew his management were going to do everything that they could to make this all go away but you were still stuck,

“I’m at work, Chan,” you whispered, struggling to stay calm. You knew how crazy people seemed to be when it came to idols but you had no idea it was going to end up like this,

“There are fans outside. How do they even know where I am?” He cursed under his breath, and you could hear the tension in his voice. He said something to someone in the room before he bit down on his lap,

“Stay inside. Don’t go near them. I’m coming to get you.” He told you but you heard arguing on the other end of the line, Chan's voice raising as he yelled back at whoever was yelling at him.

"Chan..." you whispered, you already knew what he was going to say next. There was no way JYP was going to let him walk out of that building to come and save you.

“I’m at the company, but they’re not letting me leave. There’s media everywhere outside, and they won’t let me out,” he sounded helpless, something you weren’t used to hearing from him. Chan was always calm and composed, but now he was frantic, desperate to fix this. You hated that he was in this mess right now and you weren't right there to support him throughout it.

“I know you've got shit to deal with...B-But Chan, I don’t know what to do,” you admitted quietly, your hand shaking as you pressed the phone to your ear. Tears were building up in your eyes at the thought of walking outside and being mobbed...What if one of them hurt you? You were sure STAY wouldn't but there were some fans just crazy enough to try,

“It’s really bad, Chan.” You whispered as you saw people banging on the windows and screaming. There were police doing what they could to disburse the crowd but it wasn't exactly something that was just going to go away with a snap of their fingers.

You could hear him pacing on the other end, muttering to himself, trying to figure out a solution.

“I’ll call someone. I’ll get you out of there. Just... just stay away from the windows. I’ll figure this out.” At that moment, your boss appeared beside you, his expression serious as he glanced out at the growing crowd outside the building.

"Chan, my boss is here..." You kept your eyes on your boss who seemed worried about all of this,

"Baby, I promise you I'm going to fix this...T-Text me...or something, please...Please," The desperation dripping from Chan's voice made your chest tighten,

"Sure...I will, baby, I gotta go...I'll be okay."You promised before ending the phone call. Your boss straightened his tie, Jason wasn't usually known for being overly caring about his employees but right now he looked worried for you. As did a lot of other people inside of the office,

“Y/N, we need to get you out of here. Follow me,” he said softly, motioning toward a side exit. You looked back at your desk—at the normalcy you had only moments ago—and then at the chaos outside. Your heart pounded as you nodded at your boss.

Your boss led you through a hallway toward the back exit, shielding you from the chaos outside.

"Sarah is going to go outside with a hood up, she'll distract them long enough for you to make it to the car." Your boss explained as he walked with you hurriedly toward the parking lot. A lot of the focus was on the front doors as screams erupted.

When you finally reached your car and made it home you figured all of this mess would be over. That you could hold up inside of the house and forget this whole thing had happened but as you pulled up it was clear that wasn't on the agenda for the night. You froze at the sight in front of you. Your apartment was swarming with people—fans, stalkers, media. They were everywhere. Cameras were shoved in your windows as people scrambled to get the smallest information about you from them.

You couldn’t go home. Your home was overtaken by fans who luckily hadn't noticed your car yet so you started driving and with trembling fingers, you called Chan again.

“I can’t go home,” you told him as you did your best not to cry. There was no way you could drive if you were crying. Chan's silence was deafening. You knew he felt responsible, that he was desperate to fix this, but there was nothing he could do right now.

“I’m getting you a hotel, no one will know okay?” Chan finally said. You could hear him typing on his laptop and you bit down on your lip at the thought of it. You were never going to have your normal life again,

“Stay there tonight. I’ll come to you first thing in the morning, I promise.” You nodded, even though he couldn’t see you. You trusted him—he would fix this. But for now, all you could do was hide away, waiting for the storm to pass.

"I love you, Channie." You whispered as you continued to drive aimlessly until he gave you the directions.

"I love you too, I'm going to sort this...I'm not going to let you get dragged down." He promised before sending you all of the details you were going to need.

"I've booked it under Patricia Kennedy, no one will trace it to us," He said as you smiled softly at the thought of using a fake name, like some kind of spy.

Hours had passed, and even though the hotel room was silent, your mind was anything but. The dark curtains were drawn tight, shutting out the world outside, but it didn’t stop the gnawing anxiety in your chest. You had blocked the door with a chair, even though you knew it was overkill, but after everything that had happened today, you couldn’t help it. The thought of anyone else finding you made your skin crawl.

Your phone was still on DND and didn't dare try to see if you had phone calls from friends. All you knew was that your phone was close to death thanks to it overloading with numbers. You'd managed to private all of your social media accounts and uninstalled them to stop some of the notifications, and you'd tried to call your phone provider to block unknown numbers but there was too much for them to handle.

You sat curled up on the bed, your phone clutched tightly in your hand as you waited for Chan, he had called to tell you he was on his way, but time seemed to stretch, each minute dragging slower than the last. Even in the safety of the hotel, the fear refused to let go.

A knock came at the door, sharp and sudden.

Your heart jumped to your throat, and your grip tightened on the phone as you stared at the door. It was just a knock, but your body froze. What if it wasn’t him? What if someone had followed him here? What if—

“It’s me, baby. It’s Chan.” His voice came through the door, soft but certain.

“Please open the door.” You hesitated, your hand hovering over the door handle. A part of you was still scared, irrational thoughts swirling in your head. You couldn’t help it—the day had been too overwhelming, with too many eyes on you, and too much chaos.

"Yn, I promise, it’s just me. Please,” Chan’s voice was gentle but urgent, trying to calm your panic from the other side. He tapped on the door once again and you stared at the handle.

“I’m here now.” You exhaled shakily and, after a long pause, slowly removed the chair from the door and unlatched the lock. With trembling hands, you cracked the door open, just enough to peek out. The sight of Chan’s concerned face melted away some of your fear. He looked stressed and exhausted, his hair was in all kinds of directions and he looked unkept which wasn't like him at all,

“Hey,” he said softly, offering a small, reassuring smile. You stepped back and let him in, closing the door quickly behind him. As soon as the door shut, Chan’s arms were around you, pulling you into a tight, protective embrace. His familiar warmth was the only thing grounding you, and for the first time since the day started, you felt a tiny bit of safety. You hid your head in his neck and did your best not to cry, you didn't want to make him feel any worse than he already did about all of this,

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled against his chest, your voice barely a whisper. “I didn’t know if it was you.”

“Don’t be sorry,” he murmured into your hair, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. He stroked your back softly, he would have done the same thing if he was in your position.

“You’ve had a terrible day. I’m just glad I’m here now.” He gently pulled back to take a look around the room. His eyes landed on the tightly shut curtains, the chair you had used to block the door. His brow furrowed slightly, and you could see the worry etched in his face.

“You blocked the door?” he asked softly, though there was no judgment in his tone, only concern. You nodded, feeling a little embarrassed, you scratched the back of your neck as you glanced over at him.

“I didn’t want anyone getting in.” Chan reached out, pulling you back into his arms as if he could protect you from everything. There were already plans in motion to get a guard for you, there were some stationed all over the hotel as he stood there.

“You don’t have to worry about that anymore,” he whispered. “No one’s getting in here but me. I promise.” You leaned into him, letting out a shaky breath.

“I feel like I can’t breathe. Every time I think it’s over, it’s just... not.”

“I know,” Chan said softly, rubbing gentle circles on your back. The two of you had hidden for four years, and this was something you'd talked about but nothing could have prepared you for it,

“But we’re going to fix this. I’m going to fix this. You shouldn’t have to go through this, not because of me.” You pulled back slightly to look up at him, his expression filled with guilt. You shook your head at him and touched his face softly, running your thumb along his skin.

“It’s not your fault, Chan.” He shook his head, his jaw clenched. He'd already fought with Changbin about it and apologised for it, he knew that accidents happened but he'd been stressed and took it out on the younger member.

“I should’ve been more careful. We’ve kept this a secret for so long, and now—”

“No,” you cut him off, shaking your head. “This isn’t on you. It’s just... an accident. It’s no one’s fault.” Chan’s eyes softened as he cupped your face gently, his thumb brushing against your cheek.

“I’ll do whatever it takes to make this right,” he promised.

“I don’t care how long it takes. I’ll protect you, okay? I’ll keep you safe.” Tears welled in your eyes, but they weren’t from fear anymore. You knew Chan would do everything within his power - and more - to protect you, you had no doubt in your mind.

“I know,” you whispered, leaning into his touch. “I trust you.” Chan pulled you into another hug, holding you close as if he could shield you from the world outside. And for now, in the quiet of the hotel room, that was enough.

Days passed after the chaos of the leak, and things slowly began to settle. The initial frenzy had been overwhelming, but JYP Entertainment had stepped in, issuing a statement about the mistake, and calling for fans to respect your privacy. The company took legal action against those who crossed the line, and while the attention hadn’t completely disappeared, it was manageable now. Your numbers had been changed and you'd managed to delete most of the followers who were fans in your social media accounts.

Chan had kept his promise. He had stayed with you every step of the way, ensuring you were never left alone to deal with the aftermath. You spent a few days holed up in the hotel together, the world feeling small but safe as long as you were by his side. You mostly lived in his shirts and off room-serive which had been more fun than you'd been expecting.

One morning, you both sat on the hotel room bed, the soft glow of sunlight peeking through the curtains. The two of you were quiet, sipping on coffee, the stillness a welcome change from the chaos you had endured. It almost felt normal again.

“Are you ready to go home today?” Chan asked, glancing at you with a hopeful smile. You nodded, taking a deep breath, you'd been wanting to stay longer but only because you were enjoying being so close to him.

“Yeah. I think I’m ready.”

“Good,” he said softly.

“I know it's been a lot, but we made it through. I knew we would...” He ran his fingers over your skin softly and you smiled. You looked at him, really looked at him—his face filled with determination and love, he looked better than he did when he first arrived here. Even though things had spiralled out of control, you couldn’t imagine going through this without him by your side.

“I couldn’t have done this without you,” you admitted. “You kept me sane.” Chan smiled warmly, setting his coffee cup down before reaching out to take your hand in his.

“We’re in this together, always. Nothing’s going to change that.” You squeezed his hand, feeling the truth in his words. After everything, you knew your relationship was stronger than ever. The world might have learned your secret, but it hadn’t broken what you had—it had only made you closer.

As the two of you stood, getting ready to head back home, Chan paused and turned to face you.

"I love you...okay? Them knowing, changes nothing. I promise you that we'll get into a routine," He told you as he pulled you into his arms and kissed you softly.

"I know baby, I love you too." You wrapped your arms around him and he backed you up toward the bed again making you giggle.

"Maybe we can spend a few more hours locked away though," He whispered in your ear.

[hotchner-edu]

Eyes Don't Lie | Aaron Hotchner

Synopsis: The one where you think you’re being slick about your crush on Aaron (spoiler: you’re not.)

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x BAU!sunshine!reader

Warnings: fluff, Aaron's arms, drinking

You remember it all too clearly, the day you got the highly coveted profiler position in the BAU. Not because you actually managed to get the job, that was secondary, but because the man who interviewed you was possibly the most gorgeous human you'd ever laid eyes on.

And now that very same man was your unit chief. Unbending in his resolve and ever self-assured, you stood absolutely no chance. You still had trouble recalling how you even answered the interview questions back then, only remembering how your mind spun the longer you stared at him.

When you joined the team, the overflowing abundance of joy and sunshine tying them together (thanks to one Penelope Garcia) seemed to fly into overdrive.

The team never let you forget just how much they adored your smiley nature, grateful for your constant comforting presence. Although they all absolutely loved Penelope, she was usually stationed back in her lair when the team had to fly to different places, and the effects of heavy cases weighed on them during those days.

That seemed to change when you were roped into the team, always keeping someone company and trying to alleviate their stress.

Never with Aaron though.

You seemed to malfunction every time he was alone with you, and that often led you to scurry off, your school girl crush festering deeper in your heart.

"Good morning, sunshine." Derek's voice meets your ears as he enters the precinct, dropping a kiss to the top of your head as he sits beside you.

"Good morning!" You chirp with a grin, sorting out the papers in front of you— all ransom notes that had been left by the unsub for his victims' parents. All starting with demands for hundreds of thousands of dollars, and all ending with half-buried bodies.

Derek glances at the papers for a moment before directing his attention to Spencer who was staring at the whiteboard in front of him. "Any luck with the geographical profile, Reid?"

"Working on it..." Spencer mumbles under his breath, the precursor to his flow state. Yeah, he would figure it out in no time.

Your attention is averted to the entrance of the meeting room when Emily strolls in with both her coffee and yours in her hands. "Early start today... again." She grumbles playfully and smiles as she hands you your cup.

"At least we all seem to be energized today." You smile brightly in gratitude, bringing the cup to your lips so you could blow on it.

Emily nods and plops down across from you. "Yeah, and it seems like our guy is in no rush." She huffs and frowns a bit as she addresses the three of you guys. "Lisa's parents haven't gotten a second ransom note yet."

Your eyebrows furrow at the news. Lisa Thomas was the unsub's latest victim, having been snatched almost three days prior.

"He's breaking pattern?" You ask in disbelief, frowning as you think.

"Or he's found what he was looking for." Aaron's smooth voice flows into the room and you instinctively stiffen up, posture suddenly pin-straight. "Good morning." He nods to all of you.

You miss the amused look Derek and Emily share as your eyes flicker to Aaron's figure as he strolls towards the table. He was in his usual suit, bringing his arm up to check his watch for a moment, the action drawing your gaze to his hands.

Your voice dies a little in your throat and Aaron's eyes find yours, softening a bit.

Emily swoops in and jumps off of his suggestion. "You think he's found the perfect opportunity from Lisa?"

Aaron debates this and spares a glance toward Spencer's motionless figure. "Her parents are the most affluent. It could be that he's planning out his next move to optimize monetary gain."

Still, that theory didn't seem right to you. It had to be something else. His ransom notes were vague, making steep demands that were undeniably impossible to meet in his given time window.

Besides, autopsy had told you all that he had killed the previous girls only hours after the ransom notes were estimated to have been delivered.

And then it hits you.

"He was practicing." You suddenly say, blushing sheepishly when you realize you said it louder than you intended.

Aaron looks back to you and gently asks, "Practicing?"

Willing every ounce of professionalism in your body to come together, you nod and glance toward Reid's map. "What if Lisa isn't just another one of his victims? What if she was the goal the entire time? He never intended on letting any of his previous captives live, that's why he never even went to pick up any ransom money that was offered."

Derek's eyes widen and he nods, the gears turning in his head. "Her background doesn't match his previous three victims then, but how?"

Spencer suddenly cuts in, having had an epiphany as he draws four circles around the map, three forming a triangle around the fourth circle. "Status. Lisa's family lives on the top of the estate hill."

"But the other three girls also came from wealthy backgrounds?" Emily asks, leaning forward in her seat.

"The hill is the status symbol... he's been targeting increasingly wealthy girls to test the limits, to see if he'd get caught." You say softly.

Reid nods and looks to you in an almost excited manner from the breakthrough. "We've been looking at this the wrong way. He's not trying to get ransom money, it's much more personal than that and he's trying to throw us off his trail."

"We need to interview the residents living at the bottom of the hill. Prentiss, pay the Thomas' another visit and ask them about anybody in their lives who they've casted aside that may have been personally involved with Lisa" Aaron says firmly, already reaching for his phone. He pauses before looking at you, face softening a bit. "Nice work."

Your eyes widen and you stutter out a surprised response. "I... thank you, sir."

Aaron looks like he wants to say something again, but he decides not to and spins on his heel to make some calls. Derek chuckles and shakes your shoulders. "Good job, sunshine. But you have got to stop making googly eyes at the boss man."

"I'm not making googly eyes!" You protest, ignoring your sweaty palms and racing heart.

Derek lifts his hands up in surrender, his smug grin unwavering. "Whatever you say."

It takes only half a day after your revelation to catch the unsub, a secret boyfriend of Lisa's who lived at the bottom of the hill. He had intended to take her and run away since her parents disapproved of their relationship, but he wasn't able to follow through with that plan because Lisa had found out about his penchant for murder and planned to turn him in.

"How scary." You sigh and frown a bit as the team packs up, ready to leave the precinct and get back on the jet.

"You're telling me. Killing innocent girls to try and hide your girlfriend's abduction is certainly..." Emily trails off with a flabbergasted look, not having a word to describe the situation.

"This is why I am never dating." You grumble, smiling when Emily gives you an eyebrow raise. "I mean it!"

"Sure, sweetheart. Don't think we forgot how you want to be Mrs. Unit Chief." Derek jokes, snickering as he slings his bag over his shoulder.

Emily nods in agreement and pats your arm fondly. "Steam practically erupts from your face whenever he's within a four feet radius of you, honey."

You gasp in denial and turn to Spencer. "Spence, I'm not like that, am I?"

Your friend perks up at the sudden question and blinks a couple of times. "Uhm... you kinda are." He says with a sheepish smile, hating to burst your bubble of delusion.

"Oh my god... I need a drink." You huff and sigh in defeat.

"Now that's something I can agree with." Derek chuckles and slings his arm around your shoulder. "Let's celebrate when we get back."

You throw your head back and sigh dramatically. "You guys totally suck by the way."

You try to avoid thinking of the matter in the coming days, becoming even more skittish around Aaron. Unbeknownst to you, your boss had long caught on to the crush you harbored for him, and was growing more impatient with your constant avoidance.

A week after you get back from the case, you're distracted by a sight in front of you that has you nearly drooling. Aaron is pacing in his office, blinds open, suit jacket off, with his arm muscles rippling as he adjusts the cuffs of his sleeves.

He's speaking into his phone, his signature frown painting his face.

Your chin is propped up against your hand as you watch him, a hint of wonder in your gaze as your paperwork is long forgotten about in front of you.

You're suddenly jolted out of your stupor when a pair of hands land on your shoulders. "What are we looking at, sunshine?" Derek's voice rings out by your ear as he follows your gaze with a chuckle. "That checks out."

"Here to torment me again, oh great one?" You joke and poke his ribs with your finger.

He shakes his head and moves his hand to rest on the back of your chair. "Maybe later. The team was planning on grabbing some drinks tonight, and you're coming."

"I have no say in this?" You ask and chuckle, smiling brightly at the prospect of having a fun night out with the team.

"Nope. Neither does the boss man." Derek grins mischievously as he glances towards Aaron's office.

Your eyes widen owlishly and you gape. "Wait, Hotch is coming too?"

He pats the back of your chair and smirks. "Yep! See you tonight, sweetheart. JJ's picking the place so make sure to check the groupchat." He says and walks off before you can get another word out.

Blinking slowly, your mind suddenly conjures up a mental image of your closet as you start debating on what to wear.

Meanwhile, across the bullpen, Hotch is speaking lowly into his phone as he suddenly feels very silly. "So?" He gruffly asks, eyes darting to his discarded jacket.

"What? You're telling me you couldn't feel the heart-shaped lasers coming your way?" Emily's voice rings out on the other side of the phone with an amused huff.

He sighs softly and frowns. He had no idea what the hell he was doing and why he even agreed to the the team's little scheme in the first place.

"Okay, I can hear you overthinking from here. Trust me, she was ogling you like no tomorrow. And she knows you're coming tonight, so wear something nice." She advises gently.

His frown deepens and he looks out of his office window and into the bullpen, seeing your frazzled figure deep in thought at your desk. "Yeah, like what?"

"You didn't hear this from me, but she likes your arms. Do what you will with that knowledge." Emily muses out lightly, recalling the time when you had practically gushed to her and JJ that Aaron wasn't in his suit for once when he came by to pick something up at his office.

Both her and JJ figured out pretty quickly that you were raving about it because of his exposed arms as you kept circling back to how muscular they looked.

Emily felt a bit guilty for tipping Hotch off about that, but she could ask for your forgiveness at a later date.

Later that night, you're contemplating faking a flat tire to get out of the get-together, but Aaron being the kind of person he is, would likely offer to come pick you up instead.

Seeing no escape, you decide to just toughen up and join in on the night of fun. You were dressing up a bit more than usual, and you decided to arrive fashionably late to avoid being paired off with your early-bird boss. You don't think you'd survive another embarrassing interaction with him.

It's a bit past nine by the time you arrive at the bar, most of your team already two shots of vodka deep. Waving at the group, you do a double take when you see Aaron sitting beside the only empty spot, sporting a navy polo shirt that hugged his biceps deliciously, two of the top buttons undone.

You pause in step for a second and nearly stumble into someone as your eyes are zeroed in on him. What the fuck was he wearing, and was he trying to kill you?

Regaining your bearings after a couple of seconds, you continue walking and smile softly.

"Hey guys..." You chuckle as Penelope gasps at the sight of you.

"Hot! Hot!" She squeals out and stands up, hugging you and looking at your outfit.

You smile brightly and shake your head. "Says you, beautiful! Also, are you already drunk?" You chuckle, knowing she could never pass up any kind of fruity margarita.

"Not yet! I was waiting for you!" She giggles excitedly and drags you closer to the table your team was occupying.

"Look who made it!" Derek calls out and grins, a half-empty glass of negroni in front of him.

You slowly shuffle toward the only vacant spot that was coincidentally beside Aaron, narrowing your eyes playfully at your beaming friend. "I knew you'd come kicking down my door if I didn't turn up."

Derek simply picks up his glass and cheers to your words, not even bothering to deny it. Shaking your head a bit, you place your bag in your lap and brave a glance at Aaron, plastering on a small smile when you meet his gaze.

"You look beautiful." Aaron says to you in a low voice, his entire attention focused on you.

"Oh, thank you, sir..." You say bashfully, eyes scanning his face and dropping down to the pink cocktail JJ's sliding to you with a subtle wink.

Aaron tilts his head a smidge and smiles at you fondly. "How many times have I told you that you can just call me Aaron? Or Hotch, at the very least."

"Oh, right. Sorry, Aaron." You say a bit shyly, taking a sip from the cocktail and praying no one takes notice of your shaky hand. "Uhm... I'm surprised you came out tonight."

Aaron leans his elbows on the table, keeping his head turned to face you. It was sinful the way his muscles were flexing, and you really couldn't escape the sight of the defined veins running down his forearms.

His large, calloused hands kept calling for your attention and you could only force yourself to look away from them when he responded to you.

"Well, I thought it would nice to celebrate a bit."

You nod at his explanation and gaze at him. "You... you look really nice." Your voice is soft and barely audible over the booming laughter and upbeat music echoing around the bar.

Aaron seems pleased by your words, his eyes twinkling as he chuckles and smiles almost boyishly. "Thank you, sweetheart."

Your entire face blossoms with warmth as you hear the pet name, mouth parting a bit in surprise as you try to muster up a response. Luckily, you're saved when Penelope loudly announces that everyone is doing a round of shots, leaving no room for argument.

The rest of the night is filled with endless laughter and tall glasses of colorful cocktails, leading Penelope and Derek to quickly get tipsy, hitting the dance floor together before you're even through with your first drink. You and Aaron decide to opt out of drinking too much, with the man being completely sober by the time midnight rolls around.

It's not long before you find that your entire team, save for Aaron, are scattered around somewhere in the bar. You glance at the man and find him already gazing at you, expression soft and adoring. It was clear that he was growing a bit weary the longer the night dragged on, and you couldn't understand why he was forcing himself to stay.

"Are you the designated driver?" You ask and smile kindly at him, knowing everyone else on the team would be sloshed by the time they had the sense to call it a night.

Aaron nods and he leans a bit closer to you, shoulders sagging tiredly. "Seems like it." He pauses before sighing almost bashfully. "To be honest, I lied to you earlier about why I came out tonight."

"Huh, why?" You ask and tilt your head, your heart racing a bit as he licks his lips nervously.

"Because... Well, the reason I decided to come tonight was because of you." He states quietly, eyes gazing at you fondly. "I'm tired of waiting."

You stay silent, eyes wide as you try to process his words.

"May I kiss you?" He finally whispers, eyes flickering from yours and down to your lips.

Without hesitating, you surge forward and lock your lips with his, hands resting against his firm chest. Aaron reciprocates immediately, one of his hands moving to your waist while the other rests against the back of your head, gently keeping you close.

Kissing Aaron feels magnetic, every movement flowing into something more intense as neither of you can help but draw closer to one another. His hand squeezes your waist as his nose nudges against yours, his lips relentless in their pursuit of yours.

When you finally pull back a little for air, you grow a bit shy as you see the string of saliva between you both.

"I like you." You whisper, hands rubbing against the material of his polo shirt.

He chuckles breathlessly and pulls you closer to him by your hip. "I like you too, honey." His arm wraps around you and your eyes close instinctively, feeling yourself becoming addicted to his lips already.

Neither of you see your team members cheering from across the bar as they see Aaron dive in for more kisses from you, movements akin to that of a starved man.

When they finally stumble back to the table a mere ten minutes later, no one says anything for a second as they all realize you're both long gone.

Emily groans softly and plops down in one of the chairs. "Did Hotch forget he was our ride home?"

Derek grunts and picks up a pink sticky note on the table, your penmanship a bit sloppy as if you had written on it in a rush.

'Called cabs for you guys! JJ, I called Will. Text us when you guys get home safely x'

[blightoath]

i am still thinking about this. just trying to consider if this fits what i think of feyn or if i want to roll this over to an oc i've had lurking in my mind for a while. on the one hand i don't need more muses but on the other, i still really dig this concept.

if i were to tweak feyn's history/verse for inquisition and veilguard to be a fen'harel double agent...

because they traveled together some during the blight, leliana knows that feyn is an excellent hunter and tracker, and if anyone has a hope of finding the hof, it would be him. she reaches out to him about the wardens and asks in his help searching for the hof and the wardens in general. having been mentored by the hof in amaranthine, feyn has some ideas on where to go or what to do, and takes off to deliver the messages leliana needs.

by the time feyn gets back, he's set his sights on continuing the scouting, spying, delivery work with leliana--he spends literally 100% of his time in the field, getting things to or from leliana (or charter or others) via dead drops and pass offs to middlemen or other agents

(at this point, he's awol from the wardens. most assumed he died at adamant, which suits him just fine)

by the time of trespasser, no one thing can be contributed to feyn, he's made nearly no big moves himself nor been given anything of huge import, but his loyalty to the inquisition is known, and that's key

regardless of whether the inquisition is disbanded or given to the chantry, the current spy roster has to be shaken up to faces unfamiliar--so feyn gets brought in from the field to take on bigger and more influential work

eventually they decide they need a man on the inside and feyn, with his years of independent work, excellent memory, charm, tracking knowledge, dalish background, and warden improvements, makes a fine agent

feyn heads immediately to tevinter to start a long undercover mission. gets himself captured, enslaved, and put to work in a shipyard and storage warehouse, moving goods around

assists a fen'harel agent, who frees him in return and recruits him to the cause

after doing a few odd jobs here and there, it's revealed he has a talent as a tracker and is put to work to find various components needed in some of solas' rituals

his identity is discovered once during a mission. during the mission, one of the other agents in their three person squad had died in the line of duty, and rather than risk his time as a double agent coming to light, he killed the second agent. feyn was regarded suspiciously for a time since he was the only survivor to return, but eventually his skills as a tracker were needed

he is the agent who finds the lead on the red lyrium idol and tracks it to the auction house in llomerryn. part of his ability to find the lyrium idol is by tapping into his warden ability to sense darkspawn by focusing on the call of the blight within the lyrium. when asked, however, he just says he has a lucky streak and a good gut for guessing

feyn is one of the agents tasked with protecting solas during the evanuris prison transfer. while he's at the temple, he positions himself in such a way that he can kill solas with an arrow to the heart. he fully intends on doing so until varric appears and messes with his aim--the shot goes wide and in a stroke of incalculable bad luck, shatters some of the scaffolding holding up the statues

unsure if his cover is blown or not, feyn books it down to the center platform to at least steal away the lyrium dagger. two outcomes can occur:

1) rook makes it to varric first, gets ko'd, and feyn helps neve and harding escape to the lighthouse. until anyone knows any wiser, feyn keeps to his cover as an agent of fen'harel. saving rook, harding, and neve then was a choice made by him, showing that solas was actually interested in minimizing casualties, as he figured other agents in the area would fend for themselves after seeing solas shoved into the fade.

2) feyn makes it to the dagger but cuts his palm trying to get it and varric away from the emerging evanuris. neve and harding rush out to help and catch varric's last exclaimed word as "rook"--feyn's codename amongst leliana's reports. feyn then takes the place as rook, though he's torn between loyalties and ideologies