#literally my thoughts

[villain-life]

You know what? Aphobic people messed my mind and my brain created a huge dilemma.

I’m aro, yes, but have i ever experienced love? No. Will i? I don’t know. What i want to say is, i might feel that. Will i still be aro? Yes. That’s the thing. Maybe if i experience it someday for someone, or eventually have the chance to feel something romantic, it will be different from what i expect. Maybe i’ll feel something. Maybe not. Who knows.

The unknown makes me say i’m aro. At the end of the day i’m 18 and i never had a crush in real life, just a “fictional/mostly platonic” online relationship that never had the chance to become “real” in real life.

I never had my “first kiss”, my first “holding hands”, my first “hug with someone special”. Absolutely nothing. Why? I don’t know. I always felt like i’m waiting for someone who doesn’t exist, someone perfect, someone who deserves that attention. But at the same time, i want to do this things, to understand me better. But with who? With someone i feel comfortable that also has to be attractive

Do i think people are attractive? Hell yeah, sometimes i even develop s3xual feelings. But would i step out of my “comfort zone” and go talk to them? No. If i do, my attraction always ends. This is the reason why i feel i’m aro. I never had the possibility and i never felt attracted for someone i had the chance to meet.

[loserkeiji]

time to silly little (mostly sad af) johnny marston headcanons:

important: I haven’t played rdr1 yet, know the game in general terms. probably i don’t know john well enough.

• LONELINESS. he’s so lonely. despite the presence of abigail and jack, he feels a huge emptiness inside every day. i think his outbursts of anger are related to this

• do you know ppl who love only for revenge? this is john. the fire of hatred is heating him up. it seems to me that he doesn’t really think about her roots. it’s the hate that makes him feel alive. at least until the American Venom

• in the early years his ptsd is so bad that he can’t sleep. he falls asleep in the morning. regularly hears voices when riding a horse. the ghosts of his past haunt him every day, and it’s really exhausting (hi to my ptsd pookies)

• he’s itches all over. it started a long time ago, he coms his hands and tries not to touch his face. no matter how much he washes, his skin still itches

• after Colter, he likes it when it’s cold. it seems like it should be the other way around, but he’s still drawn to the snow. he feels like unfinished business await him where it’s cold (he’s right btw)

• he runs away from home like a teenager. over time john turned into a real seeker. but he’s looking for something he can’t find. he’s looking for peace

• he really loves dogs and is afraid of them at the same time

• even when the fireplace is lit in the house, he tries to sit by the campfire outside. he is drawn to what familiar and understandable

• he doesn’t like bugs 🐛

• at first after meeting the Skinners, he has nightmares. abigail always tries to calm him down, but he won’t accept help

come back tomorrow for angst my friends luv you

[evil-mcytblrconfessions]

im so glad i got into the mcyt fandom man, that and that i ended up staying to this point even in the bad bits. bc like- ive met so many awesome people and made friends and ive got the best mutuala who are always on the same wavelength as me. i hope this applies to other people seeing this aswell because i want other people to feel as happy as i am in the mcyt community

.

[hauxicrook]

Main kabhi sochu kis-se darta hai main Kya hi chaahun? kya hi maangu main? Fizool mein main khud barbaad karun mujhe

[blanketforcas]

i guess we're all probably a little guilty of subjective perceptions when it comes to parasocially led interpretations, however when those interpretations are often decidedly negative despite claiming to be a fan of someone i have to side-eye -- it seems like personal narrative fulfilment more than good faith reading of things. (funny how it often coincides with those same people having certain narrative agendas elsewhere that perhaps could be threatened by a soft gay poem being soft and gay)

yep

[thotsandpreyers]

Taking a trip on the high speed rail

English added by me :)

[just-spacetrash]

the 'what if you played it a little risky' post literally Changed my life but i cant fujkign find it in my blog because its. a tiktok screenshot

[trainwreckgenerator]

a face you'd find on the side of a milk carton

[eosofspades]

i didn't have "i'm broken" teenage asexual angst i had "i'm literally being the only reasonable one about this concept and the rest of you are behaving like fucking freaks" perception issues

[dollyfetti]

deaf!bakugou likes to feel the vibrations of your body.

to paint a clear picture, he doesn’t have his hearing aids in, and you two are in resting in bed after a few rounds of making love (and consoling your fiancée when he started tearing up and signing about how he was fucking pissed he couldn’t hear you moaning his name)

the sun’s orange glow as it sets just outside your window beams a gorgeous light onto you both, glistening with sweat. it’s a comfortable few minutes before you remember a juicy story you’d overheard earlier that day, and you gently tap the space next to your lover (you didn’t have to though cuz he was already staring at you with cheesy adoration).

you slightly pull yourself away from his beefy chest to begin expressively signing your daily piece of gossip. you always speak out loud when you sign, even though you know he can’t hear you. and as you’re signing with speedily, facial expressions big and enthusiastic, katsuki’s eyes dart to your lips every two seconds, nostalgically remembering the sound of your gorgeous voice before the war.

he huffs, signing wait. you pause with confusion before he shuffles forward so two of his fingers could rest on your throat. he feels you swallow and a little grin writes itself upon his face. he gives you a tiny nod to continue. and he smiles at the heavy buzzing against his digits.

[shyloudpanda]

My thoughts are a mess!

For instance: if I was ever in a situation where I had a sit down with Martin Short, we would not become friends. He likes interesting people, I am not one of them. Kinda of a downer but this scenario would never happen, I have to get over that haha

Next is, I want to tell a co-worker who is friends with coworker, that I like him. I feel she would tell him but I also feel she could help maybe be like 'babe, no' or something helpful. This I can't get over but I need to damnit!

[cryptocism]

"just as I did, in 1983."

you'd never know my favourite parts of the show are the fucked up insane bits when my first instinct is to draw the cheesiest thing imaginable

[cryptidjeepers]

When i was like 10 or so, my class was getting vaccines at school and i always got super nervous about them. So i sat down and was like visibly terrified so the nurse started asking me questions to distract me. With all good intentions, she looked at my shirt and asked me if i like angry birds.

This was my shirt btw

I was so offended that i started explaing who perry the platypus was. I didnt even notice her giving me the vaccine until she was putting away the needle. Moral of the story, if you want to distract a kid get something wrong about their special interest. It works everytime

[bajaja-blast]

you dislike Luke Castellan because he disagreed with an oppressive government system and actually took action to change the abusive ways him and his peers have been forced to follow for millennia.

I dislike Luke Castellan because in the Titans Curse he manipulated Annabeth, who he raised as his little sister, into holding up the sky, the FUCKING sky, for over 20 hours and had the audacity to walk away as though he was completely apathetic towards it while she begged and pleaded with him to help her.

we are not the same.

[walkerrenee]

sometimes i randomly remember how insane maggie stiefvater was for making ronan lynch—a man that can create reality—a man of god, when he himself is a god of a man. then to take this man and have him be not only in love with, but a literal soulmate of a man named adam. parrish. adam parrish. who, mind you, lives above ronan's very own place of worship. and is the namesake of the first of mankind that the bible says god made from the literal dust of the ground (adam parrish: comes from nothing, hair "dusty" in color) and appoints him to care for the garden of eden (adam parrish: sacrifices himself to ronan's sentient forest). then has adam viewing ronan as a god and ronan saying "maybe he dreamt (created)" adam???? like who just fucking writes that and goes about their life?