#like dude it’s barely the start of the year do not do this to me!!!!

[hwaslayer]

wildfire (cs) | 7.5

—spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: assistant professor in bioengineering, incredibly attractive, lonely and divorced; that’s how most people describe san. but despite the events that have happened in his life, san has a lot going for himself. he’s a successful, sought out professor due to his brilliant contributions to science at just an early age of 32. he worked hard to get where he was now; head deep into his research, his publications, building his lab and creating a name for himself. everything was good and smooth sailing— until it wasn’t. because when he meets you, a bioengineering grad student interested in rotating in his lab, he finds himself ready to risk all the blood, sweat and tears he put in throughout the years just to keep you close— his need for you spiraling out of control like a wildfire.

—pairing: asst. professor!choi san x grad student!f. reader

—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, grad school au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 1.2k

—chapter content/warnings: not much here!!, cussing, mature language/sexually implied content, subtle flirting (in san's and oc's terms lmfao)

—a/n: hi! just a friendly lil reminder that these half chapters are random scenes/bits that couldn't really fit into a chapter or stand-alone as one. they're mostly in the past and will not always follow the exact timeline of the previous or upcoming chapter!

San booked off most of his day to help Christopher with this symposium. Well, actually, most of the group has [minus a select few others] in order to make room for the quick tech rehearsal and run through before its official start time in the next half hour or so. The staff is now bringing in the fruit, cheese and other pastries, along with coffee, tea and juice— setting them outside of the conference room on a long table. The symposium is supposed to be 5 hours, being that everyone keeps to their 20-min presentation + 10-min Q&A times. San is off to the side speaking with Jongho and Chris, while Mingi and Zara are fiddling with the AV system to test their own presentations for the final time. Even though this is the one time most of their schedules worked, Yeosang had to skip out due to heading overseas for a conference. As San sips on his coffee, Yunho and Iseul walk in alongside of Namjoon. Per usual, he keeps greetings to a bare minimum:

AKA, a very subtle smile and nod to both. One that Yunho reciprocates, one that Iseul doesn't like to acknowledge.

But, whatever.

"Did you guys tell your labs about this?" Chris nervously wipes his hands on his dress pants, nervous about how his first symposium is gonna turn out.

"Dude." Jongho laughs and pokes fun at him. "Relax."

"I bragged about it way too much, I don't even know if people wanna come anymore." San teases, making Chris shake him by the shoulders. "Relax! They'll come!"

"What if no one shows up? We'll be giving presentations to each other—" Chris laughs, but a few people start trickling into the conference room; providing him with a sense of relief. "Oh, thank god." The three start giving small nods to the students and other faculty dipping in, greeting them just as they set their things down and grab some food.

"Can't believe you actually thought people wouldn't come. Think you might need extra chairs." San points out as more people flood in.

"Shit, I did it." Chris beams from ear to ear, shifting his attention to two more familiar faces. "Oh! Hey Y/N, Jiung!" He says as the two of you walk towards their group, giving them very curt bows.

"Hi." You smile at all, especially San. He bites onto his straw, trying his hardest to hold back his smile.

"Thanks for coming."

"Of course! Got a good lineup, excited to hear all the presentations!" Jiung tugs on his backpack straps.

"In that case, send me a full report on it tomorrow." Jongho jokes, making Jiung playfully roll his eyes.

"Do you see how he treats me?" Chris and Jongho laugh.

"Nah, he's been talking a lot about the work you've been doing and how you're probably the best person to help get the rig together for our optical electrophysiology project."

"Aw, really?" Jiung looks at Jongho. "You mean it?" Jiung has stars in his eyes and Jongho can't help but deny the allegations. He has said it time and time again; Jiung is definitely doing great work and Jongho doesn't want him to go anywhere. If he could keep him for good, he would. He hopes he can.

He'd just never say it out loud cause he's like that.

"Hey now." He shakes his head. "I never said anything, I don't know what he's talking about." 

"We have a few minutes actually, let's talk about that real quick and follow up in another meeting later on." Chris looks at you. "Sorry to have to pull him away from you, Y/N. Professor Choi #2 can keep you company?"

"All good." 

"Be back." Jiung looks at you. "I'll save us those chairs." He points towards two end spots near the middle section. You awkwardly watch as Chris, Jongho and Jiung approach another professor to talk about said project, leaving you with San. 

"Hi." He says shyly. You've never seen him this way, and he's too fucking cute, too fucking charming. It makes you replay the dinner events in your head, only pushing your curiosity of what he'd be like if you two were completely alone. 

"Hi. Is that your nervous face poking out? Are you nervous?" You tease a bit.

"Me?" He playfully scoffs. "No. Dinner was more nerve-racking than this."

"What, why?" You giggle.

"Because it's you. I have to be extra careful with you, remember?"

"Right." You tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, heat rising to your cheeks as your eyes glaze over his figure; he's dressed nicely in a white button up, tie and grey vest. They're all dressed nicely for the occasion, but it's definitely an extra weakness for you seeing San like this. 

"You're cute." He mutters as he bites his straw again and takes a sip of his iced coffee, eyes looking around the room to make his flirting not so obvious. And it isn't, except Yunho has been watching from the side while he waits for Iseul to finish up working through some presentation issues with IT. He didn't mean to, but his eyes gradually glazed over to the two of you smiling and laughing.

He can't help it, but the interaction feels different. The only time he's ever seen San that shy and flustered is when he was courting Iseul. It almost feels like he's watching something unfold all over again. 

"All good!" Iseul says, knitting her brows together when Yunho seems to be preoccupied. "You okay?" She asks, Yunho finally returning his attention to her.

"Yeah, sorry. Was just people-watching." Iseul looks over, eyes also falling on San but she doesn't necessarily get a chance to think much about it before Yunho is chiming in again. "Let's go grab some food before it starts." He laces his hand with hers and leads her to the end, front row seats.

Meanwhile, you've been too busy keeping your attention on San to care about everyone else. You're so tempted to nudge him, be a little affectionate with him. And it's taking everything in you to remind yourself who you are and where you are at.

"Stop it."

"Glad you actually made it, though."

"I told you I'd come."

"And I'm glad it wasn't just something you said to brush me off in the hallway." You laugh.

"No, never." Jiung wraps up his talk with the other professors, his eyes meeting yours with a small nod towards the seats he sat his bag down at. "Well, guess they're done. I'll see you later? Goodluck on your talk, Professor Choi." He smiles toothlessly at you.

"Thank you, Y/N." He watches as you walk off and meet Jiung, plopping down onto the seat as he debriefs you on his impromptu meeting. 

"Hm." Jongho hums and clears his throat, slowly walking over to his bestfriend while sipping his coffee.

"Yes?"

"Nothing." Jongho squints his eyes at him, a small chuckle leaving his lips. "Productive conversations going around, I see."

"Mhm." San chuckles, knowing exactly what Jongho's hinting at.

"Hey!" Zara comes over with a bright smile on her face. "We saved you some seats." She points at the front row on the left side, waving them over. "Come." 

"Sweet, thanks." Jongho leads the way while Zara tucks her hair behind her ear and walks alongside of San.

"Ready?" San shrugs as he looks at her.

"As can be."

"I'm sure it'll be great like always." He smiles.

"Thanks." He lets her slip into the seat next to Jongho before sliding into the end seat, eyes quickly glancing over at you before he gets situated and switches modes for the symposium.

Though, you are incredibly distracting, and he can only hope he can get you alone sometime soon just to show you exactly how he feels.

—taglist: @asjkdk @interweab @woojirang @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs @persphonesorchid @mxnsxngie @jycas @cowboydk @vcutparis @chngbnwf @struggling101 @sanhwalvr @angelqueendom @barbielibra @brown88 @choisansplushie @yunhoswrldddd @hyukssunflower @vickykazuya @lucid-galaxys-world @jaytheatiny @pommelex @thespiffynerd @vixensss @santineez @nopension @domfikeluva @in-somnias-world @my-atiny-kookie-rkive @mountiiny

[webanglikethat]

things ram and devi have done and said without even saying they’re in love / being in a relationship because they drive me insane:

Ram defied orders from the LITERAL goddess because he didn’t want Devi to die, thus ignoring his duties

-> like …. he willingly let another woman DIE in Devi’s place and !!!! this act had been committed five years ago, when the affection between the two had BARELY begun blossoming

-> “Why bother when the goddess herself allows you to decide people’s fate?” had been Devi’s question to him, but little did she know, he already defied every rule for her, going against literal fate

he saved Devi during the arson, putting her before his own BROTHER

he went after Devi when she took off on an horse during the attack, and carried her in his arms back to safety (which he realllyy didn’t have to do 🤭)

it’s revealed he would purposefully change his route to catch a glimpse of Devi

-> Ram’s wishful desire was to see her at every service; just hoping to catch her smile along the hallowed halls where once they met

he “noticed an unfamiliar feeling rising inside him” when he met her again

Ram always found an excuse to touch Deviya — holding her hand to lead her somewhere, brushing his fingers over her cheek to calm her, cupping her face, putting a hand on her waist, trapping her against the wall, his finger on her lips, holding her hands tighter as if it could heal her holding her waist as she straddled him

he said he “missed her smiling at him”

he kissed her neck (quite literally marking her) while thinking of how De Clare would react, not realizing the jealousy that was growing in his heart at the thought of losing her to him

-> which he then said (in season 2) he’d do it on her wedding day too !!

-> in the same episode he tried to pretend he doesn’t care about their engagement 💀, mission failed my dude 🤭

“That. The way he felt when she was near him. The reason he always looked for her in the crowd and couldn’t stop teasing her”

ram always thought of marriage as a transaction, a duty to be fulfilled, something he simply had to do. and love? love wasn’t a necessary equation. that’s what his family line looked like — alliances, partnership, all devoid of tenderness. but Deviya awakened something in Ram — and for the first time, he was confused and lost

“It’s ironic that even with all the knowledge and wisdom of the world at my disposal, I still can’t figure this out on my own. I’m almost thirty, and for all of my life I have denied myself what I wanted because the greater good was more important. And in all this time… no one has ever been able to enchant me as much as…”

Ram talked Devi through her anger at the reception so she wouldn’t make a mistake in front of her guests and lose the position she had so long worked for (he helps her see the bigger picture)

Ram told her their connection wasn’t for nothing. they were fated for a reason

the less often he saw her, the more he wanted to see her

-> and if she didn’t came, he would wait for her

he noticed everything she did — be it the way she shifted from foot to foot when she was nervous or how she looked at him in fear (from the subtlest of things to the most obvious, he noticed it always)

he teased her about how much she liked him but then said:

“such a rakhasi cannot possibly die. I need her”

admitting, even if it was meant as a tease, that he could no longer exist in a world in which her presence didn’t fill his heart’s pages

he comforted her on the day of her death, quickly realizing that:

“/ wish this had happened to me instead... hasn't she been dealt enough pain already, in her life?”

“when Ram realized how sincere his desire to take all Deviya's troubles for himself was, it quickly became clear that their secret relationship had taken on a new meaning … growing into something profound”.

what started as a perhaps meaningless, fleeting, teasing affair quickly turned into something more — something he couldn’t put a name to, but he could feel encompassing his body every single second

he could no longer pretend it was just for fun or a distraction

so he finally mustered up the courage to ask Devi to be with him (but not officially 😔) even if it was in secret — for he would rather have her in secret, than lose her be it to death or another man. 

noticing how distressed she was, he closed his eyes and then slowly began kissing her fingers. Devi noticed that his eyelashes were trembling. “he’s nervous as well, but once again he tries to reassure me first, even though he could use some support himself."

he always put her before himself, over and over again. this isn’t something he was taught, like I mentioned before. for him, marriage or love was based on children, mutual respect and the husband’s views. yet he interminably put himself in the background, just to help Devi shine

“they kissed each other gently and yet desperately at the same time, as only doomed lovers can kiss.”

“he was with her right at that moment. sharing her pain and fear... would that have been possible if what they had was fleeting? he always chose her, no matter what.”

Ram: “I'll be with you. no matter what.” Devi: “I know”

he fought for her, allowing her to escape

and her thoughts led to him, even as she bled out

“the very thought of losing him was unbearable. and just as things were beginning to blossom between them.” “dying would be a little easier if you were holding my hand right now”

"I'm with him in my thoughts, heart, and soul." // "even if it doesn't make any real sense, it does for me. l feel calmer this way."

being away from her, when she was in a coma, made Ram feel like he was dying too // the thought of losing him (as she actively died) felt even worse than death

-> his biggest dream was being able to touch her again, to gaze into her eyes, to see his affection being mirrored in hers. to hear her laughter again was all he could hope for

they risked MULTIPLE times to be caught just to bask in each other’s presence — even if it was only for a few moments because the risk was worth it — they are worth it to each other

his face “instantly lost colour” when she mentioned her wedding

he tried pretending it didn’t hurt him — that he could accept it, that he could have a part of her and let it be enough, but they both knew the truth

so she laid out her future: her married to De Clare, visiting India from time to time, meeting Ram’s wife — but not him because he would still remain a coward who couldn’t voice what he wanted

so he finally let his feelings free and kissed her, marking her neck (in the middle of the hall where everyone could’ve caught them)

he touched her under the table — at dinner, where again, anyone could’ve seen them !!!

the moment Devi’s smile faded, Ram noticed immediately and shifted his tone, asking softly, “is something wrong?” -> he is SO attuned to her emotions, so skilled at noticing even the slightest change — which is especially important since Ram isn’t portrayed as someone who does this for just anyone

they know each other well enough to play off each other’s words without malice — their banter is so much fun (especially on passion route)

he fingers her in the library 🤭 he’s SO careful with her even though it’s obvious they’re both overwhelmed by the connection — he’s letting her set the pace and the fact that Ram doesn't push, but instead allows her to slowly move at her own pace, amplifies her vulnerability and makes her every move feel more significant. she’s still confused on what she wants and he lets her explore it on her own, and she knows he will wait for her

he wanted to dance with her despite not knowing how to — and in front of everyone too !! he was ready to embarrass himself for her

-> he is so caught up in her that he’s willing to push past his own comfort zone, even if it means embarrassing himself a little; as long as he can witness her smile

now she is the one who takes the power and kisses him, marking HIS neck — and so they imagine each other naked, finally taking the next step and ….

he finally admits it to himself.

He wanted to finally understand what it meant to connect with the woman he loved with all his heart.

Ram Doobay is in love with Deviya Sharma.

[dood-itsradical]

Cool? Cool.

Pairing: Jake Kim x GN!Reader

Summary: An awkward rendezvous with Big Deal's leader.

Genre/Trope: Friends to enemies to friends to more(?). Non established relationship. Can be viewed as platonic as well.

Warnings: Cussing, self/oc indulgence? (I mostly wrote this for myself), no use of Y/n, MIGHT be OOC Jake (judge them yourself, this my first time writing for Lookism).

A/N: It's been TWO YEARS since I post fanfics so I might be lil stiffy, bare with me chat. I DON'T do request btw!

Masterlist

“Man, so what now? We just…went back to stop being allies?” You questioned bluntly.

It's been a few days since the Hunt for Gun event. Everything went back to how it was. Or some would say, for the better. You weren't exactly on any sides of the crew. Scratch that, you were one of the Workers. And to be fair, you sort of still carry that guilt. Like Samuel, you wanted- no, needed money. Again, scratch that, you aren't exactly like him, God bless. You just have responsibilities at home that need to be taken care of.

Because first of all, being a broke college student got you into this shit and you practically worked your ass for it. You just wanted to pay for your student loans, bills and groceries. Second of all, news flash, Korea ain't as great as influencers described them to be. When you first moved here, you were still expecting the struggles of the norm. Not fighting gangsters. Let alone joining one.

Thirdly, you know basic martial arts. You know what, fuck that. You're actually pretty decent at it. Sparring and training with these dudes around you, paid off. And through the journey you gained friendship, learning to understand different types of people. That includes multiple reality checks, unlocking new traumas as the list goes on. Part of you have thought of the alternatives and the what ifs. While the other half is actually grateful.

“It never has to be that way, you know?” Daniel replied, offering a soft smile.

You wanted to ask if the whole fighting and scheming thing is over, now that Charles Choi is gone. So is the matter of the Red Note. But you keep those questions to yourself, knowing it's far from done when Gun is still alive even if he's in juvie. Besides, he's not the only bad guy they need to watch out for.

You shrugged sheepishly, hands shoving into your pockets. “Right.” Your head turned to the ground for a bit. Daniel senses this and continues, “We're still friends, right?”

You looked up relieved by his words, “Of course. You're cool. You too, Jay.” You added. The blond gave you a big sincere smile as you bent down to pet the puppies. They equally ushered closer for attention. Your expression softened before exhaling.

“Hey.” You started, taking a second to collect your words. “You think Big Deal would diss the hell out of me if I go in their turf? I need to talk to Jake.”

Daniel shrugged back, giving his usual reassuring energy. “I don't think so, after everything. You want us to accompany you there?” You shake your head, mimicking his smile, “I'm good. Thanks though.”

It was by then you found yourself stepping in Big Deal’s street. You weren't a coward, but you still hold respect for each of Four Major Crews. If you are being honest, you didn't even belong here. You're just a person who was caught up with your own personal issues and was left with no options but to use physical violence for your own selfish gain. It wasn't selfish, you told yourself. You just have your own goal and achievement like everyone else.

You were immediately recognised and being semi interrogated by the other Big Deal members due to your sudden and random arrival. You kept your tone as calm as possible. Getting straight to the business and voila! There's Jake.

You muttered a thanks to Jerry before turning to your old friend. Ice breaking sucked, this everyone can relate. But man, you acted like an ex begging to get together with him again. “Sooo……”

You trailed awkwardly, eyes darting everywhere in the room except him. “Big Deal's boss doing paperworks, huh? Guess nobody escaping that.” You tried to humour him, to light up the mood, anything. And luckily, he stifled a chuckle. Or a subtle exhale, you counted it as that either way.

“Yeah, well, it's my responsibility now.” Jake replied, shifting in his chair while leaning back.

To put it simply, you and Jake aren't completely strangers. You two were somewhat colleagues, let's put it that way. You never dare ask about the friendship part. Are you two even friends? Buddies? Amigos?

I mean you're very much aware of Big Deal's history. Jake isn't so secretive, mind you. You've privately met Sinu himself before, good man. You're most definitely familiar with Samuel. And by God, you weren't very fond of him. But you didn't judge him either, and as mentioned, everyone here has a personal goal. You've managed to exchange conversation with him from time to time. If I may say so myself, a LOT. Boy, was he an interesting character.

When you first joined Workers, you were clueless. Eugene offered you good deals. Obviously you hesitated in the begining. You were no fool, you knew what you signed up for. Fortunately for you, you weren't involved too much. You did side jobs, mostly undercover. When Jake finds out, he confronts you. Which actually surprised you. You fought him. You fought everyone else while sticking to the white uniform. Although he can definitely tell you held back at that moment.

“No hard feelings, Jake.” You said back then before getting into stance. You took his hit many times, hardly using your full strength before discovering you were just buying him time to let others finish their business. And he didn't blame you either. He felt bad. Guilty even, that he couldn't offer you better hospitality, better support. And yes, he admits that he was kinda cold back then. He never gets the chance to apologize. But he does now as you basically presence yourself to him.

“You aight? You know, after all the…” You trailed, subtly recalling the recent fiasco. He blinked before nodding, “Just peachy. You?” You nodded back. “Yeah.”

As if it couldn't get any awkward, you were starting to regret showing your face here. On top of that, he wasn't any near being his suave self. He had it fine with the others but with you? There's an unfinished business. He thought it's odd. It's exactly the same scenario that happened between him and Samuel, yet the tension wasn't supposed to be this palpable as far as he know.

“I'm sorry-” You both said in sync, now looking at each other weirdly. Chuckling nervously, you both did it again, “You first. No, you. Not me, you. Fuck.”

Sighing, you both let out small genuine laughters. “No, seriously. You first.” he offered.

You nodded, “No hard feelings, right?”

He smiled, “No hard feelings. It's good to see you again.” You returned the smile, the burden finally left your shoulders. “Same here. You didn't break a bone. I'm not surprised.”

He leaned forward, folding his arms on the desk. His arms bulging through the fabric doesn't go unnoticed. “Well, colour me surprised. You didn't either.” He joked back. His mood has lifted as did yours. You rolled your shoulders, pretending to flex slightly. “I tried.”

“Say,” Your expression turned slightly serious, still with a bit of amusement in your tone. “I guess I owe you a jack of explanation, huh?”

He tilted his head, “Oh? Do you, now? Lemme check.” He pretended to go through his paperworks. You just chuckled, shaking your head at his sense of humour. “Asshole. I'm serious.”

Jake faced you again, “I know. And I'm listening. We can get food while we're at it.”

“Let me guess, my treat?” You raised a brow.

He gets off from his seat, his duty now left abandoned. “C’mon, I'm not a monster.” Slinging his arm around your shoulder as he leads you to the exit.

[acrosstimeandspace]

mmm i don’t like this one bit. don’t at all. nope

[ryuseitai]

I work ok tje 17th Let me put let me out. Let me oouuuutttttt

[eepymonstrr]

plsss my dad tryna push religious shit on me 💀 YOU GUYS SEE HOW QUICK THEY ARE TO TURN WHEN THERE’S A MEDICAL ISSUE WITH *THEM*??

[watery-melon-baller]

its so fun :)) and awesome :)) that i cannot fucking make my brain focus on my homework :))) holy shit im gonna kill someone :)) why can't my brain just work for five fucking minutes :)) this is easy homework too I just can't concentrate on it at all :)) and it's due tomorrow morning :)))

[plexippusangel]

I either need to accept that I am just a way stronger person than this friend and can handle way more while still being able to engage with the world as a person, or recognize excuses as excuses, accept that I am not valued and be done or. Maybe both. Idk. It might be somewhere between the two. I am just sick of regular life stuff rendering him unable to spend any time with me, and of him being unable to bear any of the details of my life, when I would move mountains to rekindle our friendship. Though I'm starting to wonder if I still would.

[milo-is-rambling]

Damn yesterday me telling my friend I could bring her a stick of butter today but now all I want to do is day drink and smoke weed and watch sunny and cry about everything

[no-one-hears-me]

not to sound like an evil hater but I looove it when you dislike someone and then everyone else ends up agreeing with you

[sunnywalnut]

No but I'm still looking for the Denny's that is still in the middle of nowhere

having cis guy friends is so funny like youll ask if they wanna hang out and theyll send you to the dark woods

[ashtcnirwin]

🌻

[holdoncallfailed]

1996 dash simulator

🍊 allpulpnojuice follow

guys i'm serious can we PLEASE leave the battle of britpop in 1995 where it belongs i am So Tired

3 notes

👽 skygazer81 follow

has anyone heard of this group heaven's gate? they seem kinda sus but their website is sick as hell

🔬 number1skeptic follow

dude...

56 notes

👑 princessdianastyle follow

i can't believe di and charles officially got divorced romance is DEAD

🇺🇸 itstheeconomystupid follow

ok royalist bootlicker

👑 princessdianastyle follow

oh so now the clinton/gore rpf shipper is going to preach to us?

895 notes

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 lesbianbartsimpson follow

i just saw the birdcage in theatres...tbh i don't love the queerbaiting. why would you cast two straight actors to play a gay couple...

7 notes

🫎 tabarnakonwood follow

society if québec had won its independence last year

1,178 notes

🪩 rhythmnation1814 follow

i swear if staff doesn't stop fucking around i'm going to permanently move to geocities.

#i'm just glad my PC can run netscape 2.0 #but the dial-up is so slow it's like barely worth it ugh maybe i'll just stop using the internet in general #it's not like i NEED it yk

6 notes

😎 Anonymous asked: Do you agree that if the glove does not fit, then we must acquit?

🚬 mall-rats answered: Bro I'm not getting baited into talking about the OJ trial again. Go troll someone else

32 notes

🧠 craneonme follow

can you GAYS stop posting frasier spoilers

☕️ cafenervosa follow

niles fucking DIES

34,021 notes

🍳 waterydomestic follow

does anyone else feel like the pavement fandom kind of sucks now?? i don't want to be an asshole but when cut your hair started playing on mtv all the time i knew it was over.

📻 philselwaysbaldhead follow

lol now you know how radiohead fans felt when fake plastic trees was on the clueless soundtrack

16 notes

🍔 kelandkenan follow

i've always loved the way they loved...

#kel climbing thru kenan's window because he just HAS to see him even tho he's banned from the rockmore house #like i'm sorry but it's true love your honor

874 notes

🧸 thebeaniebabyenjoyer follow

whenever i see that someone's fursona is a gerbil i'm always like oh so you must be a pretty big richard gere fan

🕺🏻 scentofalpacino follow

hold on let me ask jeeves something

🕺🏻 scentofalpacino follow

yeah this is funny as hell

51,901 notes

[amandabbbbb]

summary: after the scene where ward drops rafe at barry’s and tells him to not come home but barry’s sister pogue!reader tries to comfort him even though rafe is soo mean to her like woah but it’s a happy ending

tw: mention of drugs, idk rafe cries a lot, parental issues, rafe calls reader kid and bitch once

word count: 762

“don’t come home, son,” ward says, his voice cold and final, as he walks away from his only son.

“where do you want me to go?”

“dad! dad!” rafe’s desperate calls echo into the night, but ward doesn’t look back, leaving rafe alone in the darkness in front of barry’s and your house.

“hey, barry, open the fuckin door! i know you got the coke, dude, come on. please just open up!” he’s begging on the verge of tears. “barry, if you don’t open this god damn door, i’ll fucking smash it down myself. i need coke, man!”

you slowly open the door, and before he even sees you, rafe shoves his way inside, causing you to stumble back slightly. he collapses onto the couch, his movements frantic and erratic. “barry, what took you so long? christ, give me your best coke. i need that shit now, dude” he demands, his voice thick with barely-contained emotion. when he finally looks up and sees you instead of barry, he quickly swipes at the tears streaming down his face, trying to hide his vulnerability.

“oh, hi, rafe! sorry, i had my headphones on. wanna listen? oh my god, are you crying?” you ask, your voice laced with genuine concern.

“no, jesus fuck, y/n, where’s your brother?”

“oh, um, i think he’s down by the shipyards doing a deal. sorry, rafey,” you say, offering a gentle smile.

rafe pulls himself up quickly, furiously searching for the drugs he so desperately craves. “where’s his coke? i know you know where he keeps it. go find it. don’t just stand there helplessly. you’re so goddamn stupid! fuck!”

“why are you being mean to me? you’re never mean to me… i don’t know where barry keeps the coke, rafe.”

he yells at the top of his lungs, “it’s like you have no fuckin brain. you’re just a useless dumb blonde.” (sorry i’m blonde)

the harsh words cut through you, and you can’t bear his anger. you turn and flee to your room, tears pricking your waterline, blurring your vision as you go.

your whole teenage years, you knew rafe as your older brother’s richest client, who he secretly would rip off. but as the years went by, he started buying barry’s more hardcore drugs, not just weed. you got to know rafe more as barry’s regular client. he would constantly stick around, always flirting with you and bringing you gifts when barry wasn’t looking.

“y/n, don’t shut me out. don’t be a bitch, come on, open the door. i need the coke. you don’t understand, help me here, okay,” he pleads.

you’re scared. you’ve never seen him like this; he’s always treated you like a princess. you yell as he bangs at your thin bedroom door, pushing the wood so hard it starts to crack. “go home, rafe!” your voice shaky and filled with fear.

the banging stops suddenly, your words echoing in the sudden silence. the quiet stretches on, each second feeling like an eternity. cautiously, you peek out of your bedroom door thinking maybe he finally listened to your advice. “rafe, you there?” you call out.

he’s sitting on your couch, tears running down his face, hyperventilating. “i can’t go home. i’m a liar, an addict, a thief, and i can’t be trusted, so my dad said he can’t have me in his house. i have nowhere to go.”

you slowly approach the couch where rafe sits, his face hidden in his hands. his body is shaking, and the room is filled with the sound of his ragged breaths. “rafe…” you say softly, your voice trembling as you try to offer some comfort. “you, um, can stay here tonight.”

he looks up at you, his eyes red and desperate, filled with a depth of pain you’ve never seen in him before. “i don’t deserve you, kid. fuck, i’m so sorry. i never wanted you to see me like this. i thought i had everything under control, but now you probably hate me or some shit…”

you sit beside him, offering a soft, reassuring smile. you put your hand in his. “it’s okay rafey. i could never hate you. we all have moments when shit falls apart. it doesn’t change how i see you. you’re tired. i’ll set up the couch for you.”

rafe’s eyes search yours, a flicker of regret softening his expression. “i didn’t mean to take it out on you,” he says, his voice low and raw. “i just… i don’t want to be alone. y’know, on the couch. not tonight.” the words hang in the air, heavy with his unspoken need to hold you tonight.

[madlori]

On Tommy Kinard

"It's not that I don't like Buck and Tommy, it's just happening so fast, he's underdeveloped!"

*clears throat*

Here is a recap of what we know about Tommy. And this is just off the top of my head, I didn't rewatch anything.

He was closeted at the 118 before and found the atmosphere repressive. He (probably) acted like a dick to fit in. When presented with the chance to make things better, he took it, and developed positive relationships with Hen, Chim and Bobby.

He was in the army and trained there as a pilot.

He knows Muay Thai and has a set up in his house.

He likes to work on cars and has a lift at his house (where TF does he live is my question - he has some nerve being agog at Buck's loft if he has a muay thai gym and a car lift)

He is down for violating departmental policy at the drop of a hat (has done so on at least two occasions) to help a friend and has no problems fucking with the fire chief.

He is a nerd. He likes pub trivia and has incorrect Star Wars opinions, and can keep up with Chim in the movie-quoting department.

His favorite movie is "Love, Actually" and he likes craft beer and monster trucks.

He came out when he transferred to Harbor and felt comfortable enough to stop lying about who he was.

He follows MMA and has friends in Vegas who like him well enough to hook him up to a frankly insane degree.

He'll risk his own life and engage in helicopter skulduggery to save people he doesn't know...I mean, apart from doing that for a living.

He'll take time out of his day to give a tour to the cute boy who called him up and offer to give that boy flying lessons (a significant time investment) which was probably maybe about more one on one time with said boy.

He yearns for the belonging and found family that the 118 became after his departure and probably befriended Eddie hoping to earn a plate at the cookout, aside from just clicking with him.

He likes Eddie and Chris a lot and they like him. Chimney also likes him.

He was attracted to Buck right away and was emotionally aware enough to pick up on Buck's jealous feelings over Eddie and his friendship, even if he was surprised that it was him Buck wanted to get to know.

He respects and values Buck and Eddie's friendship and wanted to make sure Buck knew that.

He's brave enough to shoot his shot by planting one on a dude.

He's a lil bitchy but also generous and ready to throw in with this insane guy who's inviting him to a family wedding after 0.5 dates.

He showed up to a bachelor party when he was on call because Buck asked him to, then showed up in turnouts after fighting a fire for like 12 hours yadda yadda we all know this part.

He has got it BAD for one Evan Buckley, who he only calls "Evan" which according to LFJR is a conscious decision by the writers, which fascinates me.

He was willing to take a chance with a man just discovering his sexuality BUT wasn't willing to put himself through that if the man in question wasn't ready for it. When Buck showed him that he was, he was all in.

He does NOT take his coffee like that.

Oh and

He's a beast.

This is VASTLY more information than we knew about ANY of Buck's previous girlfriends with the possible exception of Abby. Even Taylor did not get this much development over 20 episodes (things we knew about her: she was an ambitious and ethically flexible reporter, did not eat fudge, had a dad in jail, and sometimes jogged for exercise, she was capable of being nice and did love Buck, I believe). And as for it being fast? Sometimes it just be like that? A relationship doesn't have to have year(s) of buildup. Sometimes people do just meet, like each other, and start dating, in fact in the real world that's usually what happens. It's in TV Land that you have to have eighteen seasons of UST before pulling the trigger. Most of the time in reality people just vibe off each other and decide to go out and THEN they learn about each other.

And they've got a great start. You'd think they'd barely spoken by how a few naysayers are talking about it - the loft scene was like a solid five minutes of very open conversation, the Cringe Date seemed to have gone well and again, open and honest (if cringey) conversation before Cockblocker Eddie showed up, and the coffee meetup was again....open and honest conversation. They're not gonna show us long scenes of them exchanging firefighting stories and workout preferences (I mean, I'd watch that, but it's not what the show is about).

In conclusion, anyone saying he's poorly developed or the relationship is "out of nowhere" either is being willfully obtuse or has ridiculously unrealistic expectations for relationships and/or what constitutes character development.

As for whether they have chemistry, that's a matter of subjective opinion. Given that a TON of people watched that harbor tour scene (even when it was posted as a sneak peek) and started going "wait...what's going on here...are they flirting??" might be a clue. People were talking about Bi!Buck maybe happening with Tommy based solely off that clip of the harbor tour and what they were seeing between them. And imho that loft scene was crackling. But we all see things through the lenses of our biases, myself included.

Got that off my chest, whew.

[greengoblinswifey]

Silent Desires—Brother’s!Bsf Nicholas Chavez x Fem!Reader

summary— you’re the cool older sister who never paid much attention to your brother's shy best friend, Nicholas—until one night, you overhear a surprising conversation. learning he's never been with anyone, you find yourself more than ready to make him have a good first time.

warnings— tiny age gap(reader is 2 years older), sub!nicholas then slight dom!nicholas, dom!reader, fingering, choking, oral(m receiving), loss of virginity, unprotected sex, creampie, praise kink, fluff, aftercare, L bomb.

a/n— yes this is long i fear i got carried away..

Part two

Nicholas had been coming over to your house since he and your younger brother became best friends in high school. He was the quiet, shy kid who seemed uncomfortable in his own skin whenever you were around. Being two years older, you didn’t pay much attention to your brother's friends, considering them too young and immature for your taste. You’d laugh sometimes at how Nicholas would get flustered, barely managing a stammered “hi” before rushing off whenever you entered the room.

Whenever you did make an appearance, Nicholas would steal glances, awkwardly trying to start a conversation. His brown eyes would light up whenever you laughed, especially when you teased him just to see his cheeks turn red. Though you didn't think of him seriously, you’d caught him staring more times than you could count. There was something innocent, almost sweet, about his crush.

One Saturday afternoon, you were heading downstairs to the basement, your mom needed your younger brother's help with some boxes in the garage. As you reached the basement door, you overheard Nicholas and your brother talking.

“Dude, you’re seriously still a virgin?” your brother asked, laughing.

Nicholas sighed. “Yeah, I mean, I got head once, but I didn’t even, you know, finish.”

Your brother cracked up, slapping Nicholas on the shoulder. “Bro, you need to get laid. I don’t get why you haven’t yet. Is it, like, nerves or something?”

Nicholas hesitated. “I just, it’s hard to find someone I actually want to, you know, do it with.”

“Fine, then who would you want?” your brother challenged, still laughing.

“Uh, what if it’s your sister,” Nicholas mumbled.

Your brother’s laugh stopped short as he punched Nicholas playfully on the arm. “Are you serious? She’d never go for you. You’re not her type. She’d never go for a guy like you,” he teased.

Nicholas shrugged, cheeks turning red. “Maybe, but I think she likes to 'dabble in snow,' if you know what I mean.”

Right then, you stepped in, smiling as you leaned against the doorframe. “Yo, mom wants your help with some boxes, get up there now.”

Your brother was already on his way up, not noticing the tension lingering in the room as Nicholas struggled to form a coherent sentence.

“You know, I heard what you just said.”

Nicholas turned bright red, stammering, “I, uh, I didn’t mean—”

You raised an eyebrow, smirking. “Oh, you didn’t mean it? Could’ve fooled me.”

“Listen,” you said, lowering your voice, “when my brother goes to bed tonight, come to my room if you mean it.”

Nicholas blinked, wide-eyed, nodding slightly, his usual flustered self almost in disbelief. "Y-yeah, okay."

After overhearing Nicholas’s admission in the basement, you couldn’t help but laugh to yourself. You’d always thought of him as your brother’s quiet, shy friend, but the idea that he’d harbored these thoughts about you all along made you see him in a new light. For the first time, you couldn’t deny the thought that there was something a little bit attractive about him. The way he hid his muscular build under baggy sweaters and how flustered he’d get whenever you were around. A small thrill ran through you as you headed back to your room, feeling a surge of boldness. You lay in bed, the sheets pulled loosely around you, scrolling on your phone, fully confident that Nicholas wouldn’t turn down the “opportunity of a lifetime,” as you jokingly thought of it.

Around 2 a.m., you heard a soft knock at the door, followed by his low voice, “It’s me, uh, can I come in?” You recognized the nerves in his tone and couldn’t help but smile as you called out, “Yes, it’s open.”

Nicholas opened the door and stepped inside, looking both eager and hesitant as he glanced at you, lying there with nothing but your sheet covering your naked body. “I see you meant what you said,” you teased, watching him nod slowly, standing stiffly near the door.

“Don’t be shy, baby. Come over here,” you said, patting the bed beside you. He moved closer, each step cautious, and as he sat down, you leaned in, pressing a light kiss to his neck, feeling him shiver beneath your touch.

With a soft laugh, you asked, “So, how long have you been thinking about this? About me?”

He swallowed, cheeks flushed, before he answered, “Years. I always, I’ve always had this huge crush on you. You’d walk around in those tiny shorts, or just your silk robe, and— and I’d know you weren’t wearing anything under it.” His voice trailed off, almost embarrassed.

You raised an eyebrow, intrigued. “Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah,” he confessed, nervously running a hand through his hair. “I barely ever got to see you, but whenever I did, it felt like everything was just, thrown at me all at once.” He paused, glancing down as he added, “You’d leave me, um, painfully hard, just being around you. Just smelling your perfume lingering in the air.” He let out a sheepish laugh. “I even, fuck—jacked off to the smell of your body wash in the bathroom once. I was so ashamed, but I— I couldn’t help it. You were just so hot and intimidating.”

You laughed, nudging him. “Intimidating, huh? And here I thought you just didn’t have much to say.”

He chuckled nervously, his hand brushing over yours. “It’s more like, I didn’t know how to talk to you. You’re my best friend’s older sister, and besides you usually go for white guys, right?”

“True,” you teased, amused by his observation.

As Nicholas sat there, looking nervous yet hopeful, he stammered, “Well, I think maybe now I have a chance with you—”

You raised an eyebrow, smirking. “Who told you that?”

He flushed immediately, stuttering, “I- I’m sorry. I didn’t know, I thought—”

Before he could finish, you silenced him by tossing the sheets off, revealing yourself fully naked. His eyes widened, clearly mesmerized, as you slid onto his lap, leaning in to trail kisses down his neck. As you left a mark, he whispered, “Your brother’s gonna see that and ask questions.”

“Let him see,” you said between bites.

When you moved up to his lips, his hands awkwardly rested by his sides. You pulled back just enough to murmur, “You know, you can touch me, right?”

He swallowed, nodding shyly. Gently, you took his hands, guiding them up to your neck. His fingers brushed lightly over your skin, and as he started to grip a bit more firmly, your eyes rolled back with a soft moan, catching him by surprise. “Didn’t know people were into that.” he murmured, half in awe.

You smirked, whispering, “I’m into a lot of things. You’ll just have to find out.”

“Please,” he whispered, voice thick with anticipation.

You placed his hands on your chest, guiding his touch as he squeezed, muttering, “I’ve always thought you had the most gorgeous—um, you know,” his voice faltered, “especially in those low-cut tops.”

You laughed softly, running his hand lower until his fingers brushed against your pussy, guiding him to explore. “Go ahead baby, play with my clit,” you encouraged.

He grew bolder, his touch becoming more certain as he asked, stuttering slightly, “Does- does this feel good?”

“Mm-hmm,” you sighed, “keep going, baby.”

He slid a finger inside, whispering, “You’re so- so small, and wet. I love how you feel.” His confidence grew as you moaned encouragement, and as the tension built, you gripped his shoulders, locking eyes with him as you came all over his thick fingers.

The look in your eyes, intense and dazed, left him breathless, and he knew it was a look he’d never forget.

“That was my first time doing that,” he said.

“Yeah? Well you did good baby, making me cum like that,” you murmured, half surprised and biting your lip. You took his fingers and put them up to his lips and he sucked the remnants of your juices off clean.

“Mm- you taste so good,” he hummed.

“That’s a good boy, next time you’ll get to taste my pussy, yeah?”

You could feel his cock jump in his sweats, whether it be from you calling him a good boy or confirming there would be a next time.

As you tugged at Nicholas' sweater, he hesitated, a little nervous, but let you pull it off. Your eyes widened as you took in what was hidden underneath. Defined abs, chiseled pecs, and strong, sculpted arms, he looked like he’d been carved from fucking marble. You smirked, knowing he’d been hiding something impressive.

“God, you’re hot,” you murmured, running your hands over his chest. “You shouldn’t be hiding this from me.”

He flushed but smiled shyly, glancing at you with a hint of admiration. “Have you seen yourself?” he replied softly. “It’s like Aphrodite herself sculpted you, you’re beautiful.”

You grinned, leaning in to kiss him, before sliding down, your movements deliberate as he watched, breathless. Pulling down his sweats and boxers, he sprang free, hard and already leaking. You couldn’t help the genuine look of surprise that crossed your face as you took him in, rock hard, thick and long, all for you.

“Glad I’m the first,” you said with a smirk, your fingers wrapping around him. “And I’m gonna make sure I’m the last. No one else is gonna compare.”

Nicholas swallowed, his voice shaky as he said, “I- I know you overheard me tell your brother, I, uh, I’ve only had, you know, that once, and it didn’t, it didn’t make me—cum.” He stumbled over the words, looking both embarrassed and apologetic. “But not that I think you won’t!” he added quickly, almost panicked. “Just, a heads up.”

You laughed softly before leaning in, taking him into your mouth in one smooth motion, leaving him stunned. He was big, and you could feel the fullness as you took him deep, the sound of your gagging only spurring him on more. His moans grew louder, until you paused, pulling back briefly to whisper, “Keep it down a bit baby, or you’ll wake my brother.”

He nodded, barely able to keep his voice under control as you returned, intensifying your rhythm, you played with his balls and bobbed your head faster. His hands gripped your head lightly, and you guided them, whispering, “Hold me down.” His fingers pressed gently, sending him over the edge as he shivered, releasing into your mouth with a low groan.

After a moment, he pulled you up, his expression one of awe as he kissed you, tasting himself. “Thank you,” he murmured, voice thick with gratitude and amazement. “That was incredible. You’re so good at this.”

You smirked. “I know.”

As you gazed down at Nicholas, you asked softly, “Are you ready?”

He met your eyes, his gaze both nervous and full of longing. “Yes,” he whispered, “I wouldn’t want anyone else to be my first.”

You leaned forward, brushing a reassuring kiss along his neck, feeling him tremble. His hands settled on your waist as you eased yourself close, and he let out a shaky breath, his cheeks flushed.

“Are you sure?” you asked, searching his face.

He nodded, smiling with a bit more confidence. “With you, I’m sure, b-but I don’t have a condom.”

“It’s okay, I’m on the pill, and I want you to feel all of me.

You moved slowly, kissing his neck and quietly praising him as you felt him fill you inch by inch. He whimpered loudly, the cute sounds he made going straight to your core as you moved your hips on his cock.

“You’re so big baby, making me feel so good.” He moaned in response, his jaw agape as he struggled to contain himself. “You’re such a good boy moaning for me like this baby.”

You continued grinding on him, completely lost in the feeling of him being so deep inside you, he was stretching you more than anyone else had.

“Baby, lay back,” you panted, wanting to show him something different. He immediately complied and you began bouncing on his hard length, your tits doing the same as you did.

“Oh my fucking god,” he whimpered, staring up at the sight before him. He felt like he was going to explode watching you on top of him.

“C-choke me sweetheart,” you begged, your pace faltering but still bouncing on him as hard as you could.

“Huh- are you s-sure?” he asked, clearly surprised by your request. You nodded frantically and he obeyed. As he did, you began bouncing faster, his name on your lips like a prayer. The sound of Nicholas’ loud moans and skin slapping began filling your room and it was too late to worry about if your brother was hearing the commotion.

“I-I’m sorry, I’m not gonna last,” he moaned out, his hand still around your throat.

“It’s okay baby, me too, I want you to.”

As soon as the words left your lips, Nicholas’ grip on your neck tightened lightly and he released deep inside your pussy just as you creamed all over his cock. You both shivered and you fell on top of him, his cock still deep inside you.

“You did so good baby, I’m so proud of you,” you praised, kissing him all over, “but I’m not done with you yet.”

You switched positions, arching your back beautifully, you spread yourself for him and he watched in awe as his cum leaked from your pussy onto the sheets.

“Show me what you got sweetheart.”

His cheeks flushed but he complied, slipping inside your slippery walls and stretching you once more. The pace he went made him hit your sweet spot continuously and it was now your turn to be a whimpering mess. Feeling bold and proud of himself, Nicholas pulled you back by the neck making you arch off him.

“Do I make you feel good? You love how my cock feels as I’m pounding into you?”

You struggled to form coherent words, only moaning in response as his thrusts got harder and sloppier.

“Words baby, use your words.”

“Y-yes, you make me feel so good, so so good.”

“That’s a good girl, now rub your clit.” You obeyed, rubbing your clit and sending even more jolts of pleasure through your body. “Cum for me, now.” You complied once more, shuddering under him as you came hard in his grip.

He laid you back down on the bed and you arched again. “Hold my hands behind my back,” you begged. He hesitated at first, shocked at how kinky the request was and you allowing him to restrict you but he did as he was told, holding your hands behind your back as he pounded into your tight pussy. Looking down at your ass slapping against him, his cock disappearing inside your pussy that was just sucking him in and how he had your hands firmly behind you, he couldn’t take it anymore. With a loud moan of your name, his warm load filled you up and he fell beside you, panting heavily.

He put his head on your chest as one of his hands went to caress your tits before he went to your bathroom and brought a rag to clean the both of you. Afterwards he came back laying his head on your chest once more.

You traced light circles on his back, and he looked up at you, gratitude and awe clear in his expression. “Thank you for everything,” he murmured. “I couldn’t have imagined it any better.”

You kissed his forehead gently. “You did great,” you whispered back, meeting his shy smile, “I’m proud of you.”

In the soft silence as you drifted to sleep, you heard him murmur, almost to himself, “I’ve always loved you—fuck I love you so much.”