#like a train wreck you can't look away from lol

[infernal-feminae]

God I fucking love Valmilla

[just-some-random-blogger]

Safe Keeping | 6

Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

What say you, lady? Don't you think the Hound would make a fine husband? He would protect you, yes, and you would bear him many babes." I curtsy again but this time, my voice falters when I speak, "I- I think he would," I turn to my left, "Lord Sandor would make a fine husband... a fine father."

Sandor Clegane x Reader | 6k+ | cw: fem!reader, forced marriage, smut (piv, emotional sex, praise kink), enemies to lovers, slow burn, angst, emotional unavailability, emotional vulnerability, The Hound being abrasive, miscommunication, baby fever, fluff!, typos, etc.

A/N: i said i'd end this on p5 but i think i'll be ending at p7 HAHHAH lol. originally posted on ao3 but felt like posting it on here

Tagging: @otteropera @poisonsage808 @glitterandgoldfinds @the-queen-of-sorrows @minttea07 @fluffpudel @j3nn-1 @jelsasnowflakes1

"My lady," followed by high pitched barking made me turn around from where I sat in the garden.

Maester Yannick was walking over to me, with three puppies on his trail. He lifts his robe when he feels one of the critters nip at it. He hisses at them and tells them not to bite. Rose barks and takes it as a challenge.

I chuckle and shush her, raising a finger as I bend down to reinforce the discipline.

Rose looks at me then scurries off.

I straighten up on the bench as Yannick sits beside me. We both then turn to the soldiers in the making, training across the grounds of Brown Wood.

The Hound barks at them when they get their positions wrong.

"He is lovely today," Yannick tells me.

I turn to him and chuckle, but nod nonetheless.

He continues observing my husband, "he's been training long, hasn't he?"

"Mmm. Perhaps a couple hours," I look back at Sandor, "why? Do you think it is bad for his wounds?"

"I think it is bad for you," he looks at me.

I pull my head back, "me?"

The maester stands, "you are wasting precious time. Both of you are in good conditions," he links his hands together, "for the good of your house, it would be wise for you to be more... vigilant about producing heirs."

I feel my face drop and burn.

"As you know, my lady, the herbs I make for you are not cheap. It would be a shame to put them to waste due to a lack of effort."

I clear my throat and turn away from him.

Maester Yannick nods, "which reminds me, I will go and fetch you some tea right now."

I watch him walk away.

Once he was gone, my attention is averted back to Sandor. In truth, now more than ever has his hound persona been more apparent to me. Besides his fierceness, his snarling, his grit, the way he bared his teeth and howled at everyone, I could see his loyalty, his need to do good by the people in his life, his protectiveness, especially when it came to fighting, and his warmth.

I begin to think about Daisy. I turn to my side and watch as the pups begin to wreck the garden with their paws.

I find myself thinking about that night... that night when he said he loved me.

I rub my belly, not liking the way my stomach churned at my string of thoughts.

I watch as Sandor straightens up a boy, who was about to fall flat on his face, with one hand. He shakes his head at the child and says he can't fight if he's fighting himself too.

I imagine him speaking the same way to our son.

It was a horrible mistake. As quickly as I thought of it, I then remember telling him to give me a child by another woman.

I've set him free. He does not belong to me; in truth, he never did.

I quickly stand and wipe my face.

This was no longer leisure, this was torture.

I quickly run inside, retreating to my bedroom. Once I am there, I takes my shoes off, plop on my bed, and stare up at my ceiling. I look at the cobwebs in the distant corners and I wonder why I felt like crying but had no tears to shed. I lie there in silence, wishing nothing but to waste away.

I lift my head up from the sheets and turn to the door when I hear it open. I immediately stand and brush my skirts, "Sandor."

The feel of the cold floor on my bare feet send a shiver down my spine.

Sandor cautiously looks at me, "is everything alright?"

"Mmm?" I raise my brows, "what- why do you ask?"

"You ran inside and left your babes in the garden"

My lips part at his words. My hand instinctively comes to my belly.

"Pups," he raises a hand, "I meant pups. I didn't mean--"

Sandor is cut off by the voice of maester Yannick calling my name as he knocked on my door. Sandor opens the door for him and the old man enters, smiling when he sees the two of us. He is about to hand me the tea but then decides otherwise and puts it on my vanity.

He turns to Sandor, "I am pleased you decided to attend to your wife. Her fertility herbs are slowly being depleted. I was beginning to fear it would be for naught."

I grow frigid.

With that, the maester nods and exits, "please do enjoy each other's company."

The sound of the door closing leaves me red in the face. I lock eyes with Sandor then look away, clearing my throat. I flinch when he calls out my name.

I turn back and rub my arms, "yes... husband?"

"I didn't come here for that," he mutters, raising a hand cautiously.

My chest tightens. Of course not. I open my mouth, but he cuts me off before I could make a sound.

"I came to check if you're alright," he slowly steps forward.

I tense and nod, "I am well."

I feel my heart race when he takes another step towards me.

"Y-you needn't worry about me."

"I always worry about you," he mutters as he walks closer.

My words catch in my throat, "what?"

"Let me help you," he speaks, now only a few steps away from me.

My heart is pounding. I step back slowly, "h-help?"

"In the way only a man can," he lets out a heavy breath.

My calves hit the bed. I stop in my tracks and stand frozen. The Hound is now looking down at me. I am too overwhelmed by his presence to do anything else but stare.

The next thing I know, my gaze is drawn downward as he sits on the bed and peers up at my form.

"If you want a child from me," he whispers, "I'll give you one by no other woman but you." 

I look at him, heart in my mouth, body burning. I scratch my fingers and nod at his words.

Sandor sighs, "I need to hear you say it."

"I-" I shakily speak, "I want a child," I face him, "a child by you... my lord."

His brows knit.

My breath hitches when he touches my waist.

I can hear his heavy breathing as he whispers, "Sandor. Please."

I gulp as his palm rubs slowly across my belly. The action makes my skin prickle with goosebumps. My hand comes atop his. I oblige, "Sandor."

He gently tugs me in between his legs and my breath nearly escapes me. He rests his hands on my hips then pulls me in, sinking his face into my side. My ribs rattle with how quick my pulse was.

Sandor inhales deeply, "gods, you smell good."

I feel my body burn, "i-it's lavender oil."

I squeak when he pulls me down onto his lap. He cages me against him, my back flush against his chest. He sinks his face into my neck and slowly draws in a breath. His arms snake around me as he hotly speaks, "it's you, my pretty squirrel."

I feel his hands slowly lift my skirts up. My hands latch onto his arm that was still around my belly.

"Be calm, my wife, I cleaned up before coming here, in case I had to wipe your tears."

I make a sound as he knocks his nose into my jaw and exposes one of my legs to him. 

"I don't like it when you're upset."

My breath hitches, "I-I'm not upset."

"Good."

Sandor feels the goosebumps on my skin when his hand makes contact with my bare thigh. He shushes me as he rubs and kneads my flesh. I whimper and begin to squirm when his hand hikes up my inner thigh.

His fingers touch my clothed center. He breathes hotly against the pulse of my neck, "I'm going to take this off, mmm?"

I gulp and nod slowly at his words.

I maneuver with him when his hands come under my skirts to rid me of my smallclothes. He doesn't like the space that is created between us and rips me back into him. He ruts his hips into mine to add to his point.

I whine when Sandor's right hand rubs into my heat.

"Fuck," he hisses, "you've worked yourself up over nothing."

I make a louder noise when he prods his fingers into my pulsing entrance. I can feel his fingers slide with ease against my warm folds. I instinctively grip his arm when he sinks into me.

Sandor's other arm, in turn, tightens around me, "you can take it. You've taken more than my fingers, beautiful."

I whimper when he sinks another finger into me and begins to pump in and out. My breathing grows heavier and I throw my head back on his shoulder as he moves into me.

I feel his beard scratch into my neck. I feel his teeth graze lightly into my skin. His fingers languidly move in and out of me, even as I clench my thighs together. He makes no move to part them, and in truth, it doesn't hinder his movements at all.

I feel his tongue dart out on my neck, "I want to taste you."

I slowly lift my head from his shoulder just as he pulls his hand away from my thighs and brings his fingers into his mouth. I feel sobered by his action, taken aback by how filthy it was yet how eagerly he did it.

The next thing I know, he pulls back and lets my body fall in a space between his thighs. He quickly undoes his trousers. After, he pushes me onto my feet, and grips my hips. He rather impatiently rips up my skirts and I feel my thighs shake when he grips my bare flesh.

He pulls me back down on him, and I mewl when I feel his hardened length slip clumsily between my thighs, not yet entering me. I settle on him; the sensation of his clothes on my skin makes my belly roll.

"Fuck," he growls, as my thighs instinctively clamp around him. Sandor is unable to withhold the bucking of his hips.

When he does this, pleasure, crackling like embers, tingle up my body.

"Open up," he hisses, one hand coming between my legs, "I have to be inside you. I have to come inside, have to come inside your weeping cunny."

"Sandor," I whine as I slowly part my legs.

"I know, pretty squirrel. You're so worked up, for me," he breathes against my ear then nips at my lobe, "so fucking eager."

A drawn out whine escapes my lips when he sheathes himself into me.

He wastes no time in moving. I end up squeaking as he braces me against him and firmly thrusts upward into me.

My cries grow louder as his arms tighten beneath my breasts. I feel his hand knead one breast, but it doesn't last very long.

I am throttled onto my chest and pressed down on the sheets. Sandor lifted me up like I was nothing and adjusted me on the edge of the bed.

I'm barely on my tiptoes, as most of my weight was shifted on my spine from of how my husband was hoisting me up to cater to himself.

His movements quickly pick up the pace, and our position becomes reminiscent of the time he had me like this once before, only this time, his one hand was rubbing my scarred hip and he was much more vocal.

"Look at you, all bent over and mine," he groans.

I nails dig into the sheets.

"I'm gonna fill you up. You're going to be so fucking full of me."

I squeal into the sheets. The idea drives me wild. I plead into the bed but I don't think he hears it.

Just as I felt something begin to build in me, he slows.

I open my eyes, not realizing I had closed them as Sandor drops one of my hips. I squeak when I feel him grab my shoulder and slowly turn me on my back.

My jaw drops; I breathe heavily through my mouth. Sandor looks down on me as his hands grip my sides. He pushes me upward and presses my legs by my ribs

He slowly thrusts into me, hands working their way across my body. He rubs my thighs, my belly, my breasts. His brows furrow, "fuck. So fucking soft and warm."

He massages my breasts then works his way up to my shoulders. His one hand rubs my neck before clutching my jaw. His other hand slides back down my hips. I whine when his thumb rubs circles around my sensitive nub. It makes my toes curl.

He sighs, "so fucking beautiful."

I whimper when his other thumb swipes my lips. I find myself licking at it. It makes him groan and buck into me faster.

I push my head back and arch my spine, "fuck- Sandor."

Both his hands land on my hips. He digs his nails into my flesh and begins to move deeper. Eventually, he sinks one hand down by the side of my head for support. My hands latch onto his hips.

"Come for me, pretty girl," he groans, "I'm not gonna last much longer."

I tug at his clothes.

"Be a good girl and come all over my cock, mmm. I want to feel you tighten around me-- get all messy and wet and loud and," he gives deliberate thrusts, "so fucking beautiful."

I whine, "Sandor, I want- I want to-"

I begin to tighten and shake against him. My legs wrap around him and my hands cling onto him for dear life. I find it futile to conceal my sounds, as I cannot find the strength to shut my mouth as I ride the feeling of bliss.

With a loud cuss, Sandor rams into me as deeply as he can. His movements are rough and slow. Both of his hands secured on my waist as he spills his seed into me.

I can feel him throb and can feel myself dripping with warmth.

Sandor takes his time, really drawing out the feeling before slowly coming to a halt. He lets out a final moan when he does stop then takes a deep breath.

I look at him as he closes his eyes and straightens up. My body burns when he looks down at me through hooded eyes and rubs my body again. He enjoys rubbing my breasts the most.

My hands come to his arms, and that seems to stop him.

I am about to tell him not to stop, but he speaks before I can, "wrap your legs round me."

In truth, I didn't have to do anything as he wraps my legs around himself and picks me up in his arms. I hook my feet around each other and am careful not to touch his blistered back as my hands go to his shoulders.

Sandor crawls up the bed with me clinging onto him; I feel the strength in his muscles as he moves. He sets me down on the pillows. He arranges one under my head and brings one beside me.

He looks at me for a moment then whispers, "I'm going to pull away now."

He waits for me to respond before doing anything.

In truth, the thought of him pulling away from me makes my body ache with sadness, but I slowly nod anyway.

I close my eyes as Sandor gently draws away from me. My emotions immediately overcome me in my vulnerable state. I rub my eyes when I feel tears build behind my lids. Sandor fixes my skirt and gathers my legs together. I feel him take the pillow beside me and stuff if bellow my bum.

"This will help keep my spend from dripping out."

His explanation makes my body burn.

I feel Sandor shuffle beside the bed and I hear him fixing his clothing.

I clench my jaw, dreading what I knew exactly was to come next.

I open my eyes when he calls my name. I look at him pathetically, noticing how his skin glowed with sweat, the last evidence that he was ever in me beyond his untucked shirt.

He reaches out to me and I really don't want to take his hand knowing he'll leave me after, so I don't.

I have no idea why he still grabs my hand. The action feels like a betrayal. He rubs my knuckles before kissing them. I chew my lip, feeling wronged over the fact he has never kissed my lips and probably never will.

"I will be leaving now," he mutters.

His words gut me, as always. 

I rip my hand out of his and turn away from him, "very well."

Sandor knits his brows at the sharp withdrawal. He was gentle was he not? Still, he's being turned away.

His mouth goes dry. He slowly steps back, "I..."

I turn my body away from him. I draw in a deep breath and try to make my voice as even as possible, "thank you, Sandor."

Sandor flinches. He steps back some more, "I-I'll bring your dogs here for company."

I chuckle dryly. Company. My voice breaks, "I'm tired."

Sandor's mouth twitches. He backs all the way up to the door, "I'll let you rest then."

I cover my face with my arm and hum in agreement, not trusting myself to speak anymore.

The moment I hear the click of the door, I begin to sob. I whine as his words replay in my head. How could he tell me such things, call me beautiful and say he wants me, then leave me right after? How could he touch me like that then want nothing to do with me?

I pull the pillow from underneath my head and wail into it.

Sandor, who couldn't find it in himself to step away from the door, decides not to walk back in when he hears the crying. His belly curdles with self-loathing. He feels like he's going to choke because of how hurt the noise sounded, nevermind how lovely it was seconds ago; it meant for nothing.

He walks away trying to figure out where he went wrong. He relives every touch, every sound in his memory. His eyes water when he comes to the dreadful realization it must have been horrible being with him. He forced his wretched looks onto an unwilling witness.

He gulps as he sniffles and wipes his face in frustration. He feels like walking into the forest, never to be seen again, but then he steps out to the garden and hears small barking sounds. He looks at the three pups, playing with the boys, who should have been training, and feels his heart twist.

He finds himself imagining what the scene would've been like if Daisy was here... if his pretty squirrel-- he shuts the thought away.

I knock on Sandor's office door and enter when he tells me to come in.

He looks up, does a double take, then immediately stops doing whatever it was he was doing. He clears his throat, "Lady Clegane."

His words pierce through me. He's never called me that before. I close the door and walk towards him, "Lord husband. Good morrow to you. Where is Andrew?"

His shoulders tense, "he... should be here any minute."

I nod as I halt in front of his desk, "he has gotten good enough at reading and balancing coin, I hope?"

Sandor sighs, "yes."

I notice the crumbs on his beard, then I notice a plate on his desk. He must have broken fast here. I fidget with my fingers and wipe my chin, hoping he would get the message. He doesn't. I decide not to note on it and simply get to the point, "maester Yannick said your wounds have dried up, and that if you liked, you could go on your rounds again."

Sandor nods and straightens in his chair, "I think I'll start once I'm confident in the bloke balancing our coin."

I nod slowly and link my hands together, "alright," I shift in my spot and turn to the door.

I look back at him and feel my body burn under his scrutiny. I offer a smile, "that is all I wanted to say," I rub my hands together, "-wanted to check on you."

I gasp when he jumps out of his chair.

I clutch my chest and stare at him. He had an arm raised and reached out to me. It dawns on me he said something but it was too quick for me to catch.

I release a breath, "pardon?"

Sandor lowers his hand, rolls his shoulders back, and clears his throat, "I... I asked how you're doing."

It takes me a few moments to realize the meaning of his words. I shift and my spot and rub my chest. I feel my neck burn when he further clarifies his question.

"Yesterday, when we... bedded, I didn't hurt you, did I?"

I draw out a deep breath and smile softly, "you were... gentle with your touches."

Sandor is unsatisfied.

I aimlessly look around, "and, anyway, I am not as fragile as you think."

He purses his lips and tilts his head. He takes a moment before speaking, and when he does, he does so hesitantly, "I was afraid I made my pretty wife weep again."

I instinctively let out a laugh, but it was clearly unamused and pained. I feel like I was being scorched alive when I look at him looking at me. I shake my hands, suddenly in denial, "no, I was quite satisfied!"

Sandor's eyes widen a fraction.

Fuck. Fuck. Shit. Fuck. What am I saying?

He blinks twice and wipes his mouth. Finally his crumbs fall off. He mutters, "that's... good."

I release my final chuckle. He turns to his desk, fixes some things, then looks back to me. He looks like he means to smile but he doesn't, "I'm glad."

He slowly sits down afterwards.

I feel like I'm being weighed down by anchor.

That was it. That was the conversation.

Sandor is no longer looking at me. He shuffles the paper into a file and I slowly begin to feel the air around us thicken.

He sets the parchment down and darts his eyes to me. He purses his lips again and I catch the way his face twitches. He opens his mouth and slowly points to the door, "if that's all... I would not keep you."

I don't know why I laugh again, but I do. It's not even funny. I feel like being stabbed would have been better, more amusing at this point. I curtsy at him and shuffle backwards, "of course. I do not mean to keep you either."

Sandor feels sick. He clenches his fists and turns to his desk. He breathes in deeply, trying not to rile himself up any more than he already was. Gods knew he would use all his strength to keep this room locked.

I walk towards the door and turn the knob. I feel a wave of tears threatening to spill, and I slap my mouth when a squeak leaves me.

Sandor is immediately alerted. He looks up and pushes himself on the edge of the seat, "what?"

I turn to the ground and wipe my face. I take two seconds for myself then turn to him. I cover up with a chuckle, "I said... y-your beard."

Sandor immediately rubs his beard.

I chuckle louder, trying to convince myself that I actually found it funny, "you have crumbs on your beard."

Sandor looks at me like I grew another head.

I laugh enough that I actually start laughing at myself.

When I stop, the silence is loud.

Sandor clears his throat and cautiously asks, "you find that funny?"

My stomach drops when I see the red tinge of his ears. I walk up to his side and shake my head, "wait, no- I- I didn't mean it like that."

Sandor shakes his head and offers me a quick and small smile, "it's fine. I just wasn't expecting that from you," he looks back to his desk, "anyway, I'm used to it."

I feel like my entrails were being grinded.

A line forms in his brows, "I don't think I've ever heard you laugh before."

"I wasn't laughing at you!" I whimper under my breath. The air in my lungs begin to catch in my throat as I exhale, "I was just- I ju-"

Sandor turns to me, face slipping when he catches my teary eyes.

He stands and takes my shoulders.

I blink my tears away and smile in an attempt to calm myself. I am glad I do not shed a tear. I speak through a loud breath, "I'm just nervous when I'm around you!"

Sandor immediately releases me. He sighs through his nostrils, "scared, you mean."

I shake my head and take his shoulders, "nervous."

The Hound seizes up like there was a knife to his neck. I take a moment to look at him and pull back.

I cannot deny it hurt when he immediately steps away from me.

I really should have left at this point, but my mouth had a mind of its own. I furrow my brows and give him an earnest look, "I can trim your beard for you."

He steps back one last time, then looks at me as if I now had three heads.

I realize my mistake, "if-if you want me to. I'm not saying you should, I'm just offering to-"

"You want to do that for me?"

I turn to stone. I look around nervously, "mmm... o-only if you'd have it... ... my lord."

Sandor's face twitches. He sighs and slumps forward. He furrows his brows, "you'd be staring at my face the whole time."

I watch him as he rummages through his things.

My stomach rolls again and I step back, "ah... I see."

Sandor stops to look at me.

"If you do not feel comfortable, I will not..."

My words run dry when he pulls out shears. I watch him as he straightens up. He grips the tool in his hand, "it's you I'm worried about."

I look up at him, not knowing what to say.

"I don't mean to scare yo-"

"I'm not scared of you," I mutter.

Sandor stares at me. After a moment, he slowly takes my hand and hands me the shears, "maybe you should be."

My chest pounds at fleeting touch.

I cut his beard in the garden, as I didn't want to make a mess in his office.

He sits on the bench there.

The breeze blows at both our hair.

"You needn't touch me so gently, girl," he says, "it will take a lot of you to hurt me."

I do not change the manner in which I touch his cheek. I can feel Sandor looking at me, but I do not avert my attention away from his beard, "just because you do not hurt easily doesn't mean I cannot be gentle with you, Hound."

The Hound reaches out to my thighs when my foot rolls on a rock. I barely even fidget, but, still, he holds me in place to keep me from a potential fall. He does not release me. I gulp when I feel his thumb rub my skirt.

"You can hurt me if you like," he says.

I pull back and furrow my brows, "would you like that?"

He grinds his lower lip in his teeth. He debates for a moment and I decide to snip his mustache. I shush him when he tries to speak. He purses his lips tightly.

A moment passes with just the sound of cutting.

"I wouldn't want to cut your lips off," I shift in front of him, still ever so aware of his touch of my thighs, "you still need them to kiss."

I pull away to check if his mustache was straight. I notice his expression, dumbfounded, and continue snipping. I sigh, "that was a jest."

I pull away and again and move to the other side. Sandor still keeps his hands on me. He looks at me as I gently move his head.

I add, "I'm quite funny actually."

He chuckles lowly.

It makes my heart flutter.

He smiles, "oh, I don't doubt it, little girl."

I flatten my lips into a line, unsure if he was serious or not. I trim the hair by his jaw.

"You must like kissing then."

I freeze in my spot. I stop what I was doing, then continue, "what do you mean?"

He pulls his hands away. I watch him link them together and rest them on his lap. He shrugs, "you thought of kissing."

"Do you like kissing?"

I place a hand on my hip. He turns to me and shrugs again, "s'fine."

I furrow my brows and mimic his shrug, "well, you've never kissed me, so I wouldn't really know, would I?"

"You've never kissed a man before?"

"No," I impatiently respond, "I've kissed you, but you did not kiss me back," I take a few last cuts off his beard, "on our wedding day, remember?"

I see Sandor's look of disbelief when I finish and brush him off. Specks of hair fly off with the wind.

"You never kissed a little lord in secret as a little girl?"

"Only a big lord," I make a face, "as according to you I still am a little girl."

He stands from where he sat and peers down at me.

I purse my lips and cross my arms. I shrug, "point taken."

His brown eyes glimmer with confusion. I find myself raising my brows. Just as he is about to speak-

"MILORD, MILADY!"

We turn to the three young men walking over to us. I recognize them as Sandor's training apprentices. They push each other as I turn and smile at them.

"Good morn', lady!" Harry says, bowing exaggeratedly at me, "your dress is very rambunctious."

I furrow my brows at his words and find myself chuckling, "uhhh, thank you?"

Sandor raises his brows and curls his lips.

Daniel slaps Harry behind the head, "YOU MUG, D'YA KNOW WHAT YOU SAID, EVEN?"

Harry hisses and shoves Daniel, "DON'T HIT ME!"

Daniel gets shoved again when he incidentally elbows Richard, "OI, WATCH IT!"

The boys begin to quarrel. 

I step back before they can accidentally hit me, in turn, knocking my back into Sandor's.

"Enough!" the Hound barks, making the three brothers, or at least they acted like that, stop and turn to him.

My eyes widen at the sound of the Hound telling the boys off. I watch each of them tense as their Lord Clegane goes on a whole speech about biting off more than they can chew, and that, "if you lot want to act all tough around me, know I'll knock all three of your egg-heads with my hands tied."

I turn to the Hound, "Sandor."

He lets out a deep breath then eyes the three before him, "fuck off."

The boys immediately scram.

I bend over and grip my hips as I catch my breath. Lucy laughs at me as she beckons the puppies over with a stick. They come running over then she throws the stick for them to chase.

I huff, "these pups will be the death of me."

Lucy snorts, "and here I thought you wanted children."

I glare at her as the three small dark furred creatures begin to chase her around the garden as she runs. I call out in offence, "I do!"

Lucy runs over to me, "well, don't you know babes are far worse that this!" 

She giggles when she grabs my shoulders and uses me as a shield for the dogs. Though I was still winded, I laugh with her as the puppies prance around me. I grab Lucy's arm and begin to wrangle with her, "at least my babes will learn to speak. These pups know no sense!"

Lucy pushes me forward, encouraging me, "no, no, go on, s'your time to run, milady!"

I whine, "I really can't, Lucy."

"Oh, come on, lovie, you used to be full of energy! You're actin' as old as maester Yannick."

I hold back a laugh and shoot Lucy a look.

She shoots one back, "what? Did I lie?"

"Girls."

Lucy and I stop and turn to whom spoke. Sandor looks at us the way he always did, scrutinizing and serious.

I straighten up and nod in regard, "my lord."

Sandor sighs and looks away with annoyance. Wind blows his hair, adding effect to his expression. He looks down when the puppies begin to run towards him. They stand on their hind legs, pant, and bark. I swear I saw his exterior break into fondness.

But then he looks at me and it's all gone, "this came for you." He holds out a letter to me between his fingers, "I don't recognize the house sigil."

I walk up to him, smoothening my skirt out, then take the letter. I look at the wax seal for only a second then open the letter.

Sandor watches me raise my brows. He chuckles.

Lucy watches Sandor smile softly before purposefully frowning.

I look up at my husband, "it's from house Alistair."

Sandor's face scrunches up, "never heard of it."

I huff and delay my response to stop the puppies from chewing at the Hound's trousers. Sandor watches as I do this and gently shakes the puppies away. He takes my arm, preventing me from bending down, "I don't mind. They're just pups."

I give him a look, "if I don't stop them now when they're tiny, nothing will stop them when they're big."

Sandor watches as I sternly tell off the puppies and shoo them away. He chuckles at it, but then freezes when Lucy chuckles as well. The two make eye contact. Sandor doesn't have time to react.

"Cedric."

He turns to me, face contorting, "what?"

The puppies run off and Lucy runs along with them. I continue to explain, "Cedric is from House Alistair. You know, the lord that gave us a place to stay. You called him pretty bo-"

"I remember the fucker," he snaps.

I tense.

The Hound's nostrils flare, "what does he want?"

Suddenly, the letter in my hand feels heavy. I shrug, "he's invited us to his nameday celebration."

Sandor scoffs, "you mean he's invited you."

I release a frustrated huff when he begins to walk away. I follow after him and open the letter. I clear my throat and read aloud, "Fair greetings to Brown Wood, the home of House Clegane. May this letter find you in good spirits and health."

Sandor rolls his eyes as he walks back inside. He makes no haste, but I do, in order to keep up with him. I continue, "Seven days from now, I, Cedric Alistair, will be celebrating my--"

"I don't fucking care, little girl," he stops in his tracks and turns to me.

I nearly collide with him, but I gladly don't. I purse my lips and continue anyway, skipping to the part that holds my point, "if the Lord and Lady Clegane be so courteous in taking time out of their day to attend my feast, I would gladly-"

"Do you want to go, squirrel?"

I look up at him, blinking at the sight of his stern expression. I have to say, the omission of the word pretty for his petname made it feel... wrong. I clutch the letter by my belly, "he hosted us, me, Lucy... Daisy, even you, when we had nowhere to go. I think it only proper to attend his nameday to show appreciation and respect."

Sandor's eye twitches. He looks away and sighs.

I chew my lower lip, "he was kind to us, Sandor. I only mean to-"

"Fine," he cuts me off, "but if he touches you," he walks off, "I'm going to kill him."

His statement make my stomach churn. I cannot for the life of me understand what the intent of his words are. I chase after him again, "what if he asks me to dance with him?"

Sandor chuckles dryly, "a fine reason to chop him up."

He stops when I grab his arm. He looks at my hand on his bicep then gives me a look as I say, "you cannot kill him."

Sandor places his hand atop mine, "then don't fucking dance with him."

He squeezes my hand but it is not rough at all. It's gentle and extremely warm. He doesn't even try to pry my grip off, in fact, it's like he was tightening it on hm. My lips part and my body begins to burn.

I then realize when he was close enough for me to feel his breathing that he had been leaning in. I catch the way his eyes dart down to my mouth. I find myself slowly pressing my lips together.

I close my eyes when Sandor comes close to my cheek. I swear I felt my heart leap into my mouth when he pressed his face against mine.

He draws in a deep breath then sighs, "have you ever seen a hound share?"

The silence between us is deafening.

"Hmm?" he hums.

I open my mouth but nothing but mindless sounds leave me.

"I don't even think your pups do that."

My breath catches in my throat when he I feel his beard and his lips press gently against the crook of my neck.

Then the next moment, he releases me and pulls away like nothing happened.

We stare at each other for the longest second of my life. I feel like I'm on fire. What's worse is that I don't think he realizes just how affected I am, or actually... maybe it was good he couldn't tell I was dying inside.

"Still," he nods, "a dog is a dog and I will do as my master commands."

I feel light headed when he walks away.

I clutch my belly and walk to the nearest surface for support. I rub my neck, wondering if that really just happened.

[bumblebeesfromvenus]

Simon relationship hcs ♡

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I may have gone a little off the rails, and this sort of turned into a little bit of a psychoanalysis for Simon lol

I just had a lot to say, okay

Hope you like it <3

The ask is here ♡

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The only way I can ever see Simon getting in a relationship is through friendship.

First of all, no one would realistically ever approach him, he's a scary looking fella. I know I would be scared shitless lmao (love you, simmy)

The tall, dark and broody aura with cold brown eyes, almost like the freezing dirt you'll be buried in if you look for a second too long. Or that's what it feels like. The skull mask doesn't help either, it's sort of odd, but who are we to judge, right?

I know a lot of people say he doesn’t know how to talk to people, and while I think that is definitely true to an extent, I also think that he just doesn't want to. He doesn't see the point in it, and that's the thing.

This man can't do anything without reason. There needs to he a reason or a point to doing something, otherwise it's just a waste of time in his eyes.

The only exception is going out with the boys or hanging out occasionally. I think he very much feels like he doesn't deserve happiness, so any simple pleasures are immediately shut down.

I mean, this man is literally the king of self-destructive behavior.

He locks himself away on leave, again, only does what he needs to on base (or what he feels he needs to), and that's it.

But he's also very responsible, so I don't think he'd ever do anything self destructive wise that would be considered irresponsible.

He takes care of himself on a physical level, and he needs to, but his mind is an absolute train wreck. His job keeps him in check, and that's good.

Otherwise, he'd be down a hole the size of the Mariana trench.

He chronically needs to have noise playing. Whether that's music, a movie, or just the dishwasher running, just something. He would spiral so fast if he had time to be alone with his thoughts, so he keeps himself busy.

In comes Riley (the best boy). Simon has something to do, to busy himself with, and he actually gets outside sometimes because of the pup. He's got a cuddle buddy, a weighted blanket, and a steady presence in his life all at once. Dog of the year award goes to Riley.

Anyway, you somehow got into their little circle. Probably through Johnny or Kyle. They start taking you along to the nights at the pub or the football games at one of their flats because you're fun to hangout with. They like to have you around and let me tell you, Simon is not thrilled at first.

How dare you just inject yourself into their group, and come along during their hangouts. He's annoyed. Not at you, necessarily, but just that he needs to deal with change now. Which isn't usually a problem considering he needs to be kept spontaneous and alert for his job, but once he's away from that, change is like his worst enemy. He hates it.

Things are fine like this, good almost, why do they need to change? He's very cold and sharp with you for the first few months, he just needs time. He sees that you're not a threat after a while.

You didn't disrupt their dynamic as much as he thought you would. You're a fun addition, but you don't steal all the attention from his friends. You know when to back off. After a hard mission, they all need to decompress, and they just can't guarantee they won't snap at you and hurt your feelings.

You respect it, and with a quick "don't be stupid. Stay safe" text the conversation is done.

You don't ask about their job. You don't really care what they do, and they obviously don't feel comfortable telling you too much, but as long as they come back safe, you're good.

You bring a more caring presence into the group, something which they all need desperately. Simon is caught off guard. He never expected something like this, but it feels... nice. We all know you melted his cold heart and he's putty.

But not an overexaggerated amount, just right where he can crack a smile or huff a laugh, and it doesn't feel weird. He even starts to hang out one-on-one with you. It starts off somewhere in public, a cafe or the local pub. The idea of coming to your flat is still a little uncomfortable inside his chest, but you don't push. You're just happy to spend time with him.

And then, out of nowhere, he invites you to his flat. All on his own, comfortably, and you have to stop yourself from being too excited that you finally cracked him.

Simon does feel a little nervous when you first get there, but you're so chill about it (you're probably freaking out on the inside as well), and you just hang out like you normally would.

Riley is so excited to have a new friend!!! No matter how old he is, he jumps around like a puppy, overjoyed to get a visitor.

The second he sees how you're acting with Riley, he's smitten. Not necessarily in a romantic way just yet. You're giving him scratches and pets and talking in The Doggy Voice and it makes Simon's heart all fuzzy.

Riley is essentially his best friend and family, having been there through some of his worst times and to see how infatuated his pup is with you makes him so happy.

I mean, now you just have to come over more often, right?

He always talks about how Riley misses you (all an excuse, he misses you, but he won't say that) and that you need to come over to hangout soon.

When he's deployed again, he leaves Riley with you. That's the equivalent of someone trusting you with their newborn child for Simon, but he trusts you fully. You've earned his trust, respect, and adoration. (Cue Simon giving Riley a serious pep talk to keep you safe but it all slides off, Riley's got smooth brain)

When he comes by to pick Riley up and he steps inside your home for the first time, he gets smacked in the face with a feeling he can only describe as home. It's so warm and cozy and you.

That's when he knows he's fucked. He never wants to leave. It's so much better here, with you and Riley, than his flat. Sure, he can call that home too, but not in the way he can call you home.

It's a very subtle love that slowly starts to bubble up. He enjoyed being your friend, you made him feel normal for once in a while. He was just a guy with a job and friends. Not lieutenant Riley. But how could he have not fallen for you? He wants to be more than just friends, he wants to be yours.

He's never felt more taken care of than when he's with you, and he's slowly letting himself feel the good things again. And you're the best thing. For him and Riley. The pup probably thinks you're his mum already tbh

He gets touchier too. An arm slung around your shoulders, your thighs touching when he's sitting next to you or brushing his fingers against yours. He craves your touch so bad, he even starts hugging and the boys absolutely lose their minds

He feels like you're soothing all that has ever made him feel pain or weird. So, basically, he's utterly in love with you. But he will never ever say a word about it. His fear of your potential rejection almost paralyzes him.

He can't lose you and he'd rather stay silent about his feelings than mess up what you have.

Now, the boys are trying to get into his thick skull that you're also head over heels for him, but he's so far in denial, you could call him a crocodile ( hehe de-nile, get it?)

You confess. Your willpower just can't rival Simon's, and you crumble. How much you like him, how amazing he is in your eyes and how when he came to pick up Riley you almost felt like a little family.

And at that, he breaks. He doesn't know what he's doing, he's never been in love before, he's walking in the dark but he can't care about that when it feels so right. I imagine he probably just stares at you for a while while you're sweating buckets because he doesn't know what to do.

Does he say something? Does he kiss you? Does he hug you? Does he propose-

He's so caught up in his head, playing all kinds of different scenarios that he forgets that he didn't answer you.

Simon gently pulls you into a hug and you can feel the love oozing from his touch. He's not a man of many words, so all he says is a quiet

"be mine."

And the deal is sealed, ladies and gents!!! You just hold each other for a while, feeling the relief wash over your hearts.

Simon loves so fully it makes my heart all fuzzy just thinking about it.

It may not seem like that to other people, but he loves you so much it's insanity. Now, he's not about any grand gesture but the little things that will make your life that much easier. Of course you do get the occasional bouquet and don't get me started on the dates he takes you on, but he will do the dishes after dinner.

He'll fold the laundry. He'll feed the dog. He'll sweep the living room. He'll grocery shopping. And if you're someone who tends to get a messy room very quickly (like me lol) He'll help you set up a system to keep it functioning and neat.

Simon brings the structure, helping you get through your days better while you show how him to enjoy things.

The little things. Like the little dance parties you have with Riley. Like the late nights with the moon shining down on you. Like the sunny day in the park that led to the best afternoon nap ever. You balance each other perfectly, and Simon loves that about you.

You loosen him up. He's still Simon, and that's perfect, but seeing him crack a smile more often doesn't only warm your heart, but the ones of his boys, too.

He's not big on PDA but at home he has now issues with showing how much he loves you. A kiss here, a peck there- he can't ever pass up an opportunity to kiss you.

Now jealousy.... I do think he gets a little more secure the longer you are together but he will still kill anyone with his stares that dares to even look at you suggestively.

He's very possessive. He's always been possessive, not wanting to share with his brother or being very particular about who gets to touch his things. But you? Christ, that's another level. You belong to his heart, and not in a weird objectifying way. You chose him despite everything that he was and is and you're willingly his so of course he won't let you go as long as you want to stay.

It still baffles him everytime when some bloke comes up to you, with Simon obviously being pressed to your side, and asks for your number. He always had the problem of being noticed a lot with his size and now he's suddenly air??

He'll step in everytime, pulling you closer and wrapping himself fully around you. Simon will definitely say something as well, but his absolute favorite thing is when you beat him to it.

"I'm taken, Thank you. I'm very happy with Simon. Say hello, Simon!"

You smile innocently at the drunk man in front of you just to make it extra awkward and Simon has the biggest grin underneath his mask before he presses a kiss to your temple.

What you didn't see was the death glare Simon shot him, making him scramble away to presumably bother another poor woman.

He can get overly jealous if you don't get the hint sometimes, but he would never ever take that out on you. He'll be grumbly for the day until you can get out of him what the problem is.

But at the end of the day, you're in his bed and that's all the reassurance he needs.

He loves cuddling you. He'll knock out in seconds if you're in his arms or vice versa. He prefers to be the big spoon because he needs you pressed against his chest, but he won't deny you the pleasure of being his lovely jetpack.

Simon LOVES to get kissed on the cheek. It's so sweet to him, a little token of your appreciation or a good luck smooch. It makes his nose scrunch up slightly and it's the cutest thing ever.

For you, he adores placing little pecks on your nose. Mainly because you complain that it tickles and he thinks you look adorable, but nothing can beat your lips on his.

Holds your hand in his sleep. It's more of a subconscious thing, but it's so endearing. You're not sure if Simon knows that he does it. You haven't told him. You're just gonna keep this sweet little secret to yourself.

You'll end up getting married because he knows you're the one. He doesn't want anyone else ever.

You're all he needs and wants.

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If you want my NSFW hcs on Simon, just pop into my inbox and ask for it!! This post is already so long, I'll make a separate one for the spicy stuff if you want it :)

More Cod works and other stuff --> 🐝💫

~Fi 🩷

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[joyfuladorable]

Fuck it, here's all my favorite Mikey-centric fanfics!!

There's A LOT + personal blurbs, so they're going under the cut (Mostly AO3, but there are some FFN links, too. Also, besides like the first two, there's no favoritism in the order)

2k3:

Pretend That I Never Left by redstringraven(sirimiri) - Complete/Plans for an Epilogue & Sequel!!

Fic that changed my BRAIN?! If my fanart [1 | 2 | 3] for it is any indicator, lol. I'll say for the umpteenth time that if you're looking for an Excellent Mikey fic with Perfect Characterization, this is IT (and you don't need to know ANYTHING about HZD trust me TRUST ME this fic deserves WAY more love) His swift ride-or-die friendship with Aloy will melt your damn heart!

Dragon of the Sun by ForestWhisper3 - Ongoing

My Other TOP favorite Mikey fic!! Again, fanart [1 | 2 | 3] indicator! Slow Burn(ish) Canon Divergence of Mikey unlocking his Mystic Powers as his family looks on in dismay as they struggle to protect him. The Good Shit!!!

Of Darkness And Light by Bayluff - Complete

OOOOOOO THIS ONE! Very good (also drew fanart for it)! Evil creature literally trying to consume Mikey's lifeforce from within as his family scrambles to help

A Chat With The Titan by secreterces5 - Complete

Mikey has a fun one-on-one talk with the supposedly reformed Bishop in Fast Forward. Mikey vaguely threatening Bishop, HEEHEE

A Simple Act Of Kindness by UlisaBarbic - Complete

That feel when you put your worth in what you can DO and the wish to be Acknowledged and the ONE thing you thought you did right was taken away OOGH AGH OOOOGH

Difficulty Breathing by RealityBreakGirl - Complete

Mikey did not come out of Grudge Match unscathed *smile* Truly one of my favorite 03 Mikey prompts to read about (honestly just check the entirety of the Grudge Match tag on AO3 for a fun time)

"A delivery boy! Uh, or turtle." by LollyHolly99 - Complete

Fic that has the distinction of being the first one I ever did fanart for! Gender Feels for Mikey cuz they're just like me FR!!

What Darkness Most Fears by UlisaBarbic - Complete

OOOGH AGH I LOVE THIS ONE!! Mikey has to save his bros from the clutches of an evil spirit while surviving horrifying monsters and battling a wicked fever!

Michelangelo by ForestWhisper3 - Complete

Mikey through the eyes of his family and how much they respect him and know him UwU

Mikey's Jigsaw by SailorSaysAhoy - Complete

Another awesome gender Mikey fic HOOHAA

Train-Wreck of Thought by halogalopaghost - Complete

When you're so talented you learn how to astral project but you start using it for pranks instead of understanding the drawbacks of said power and that bites you majorly in the ass big time (very good my stomach turned while reading this /pos)

A Brother's Bond by SuperKat - Complete

Mikey gets Real Sick and the fam can't help but remember last time one of them got so ill. OH MAN heartstrings WILL be pulled in this one!!

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year by moogsthewriter - Complete

Why can't Mikey ever catch a break during Christmas! A short fic that I enjoy Immensely for Mikey being stubbornly heroic and his family desperately trying to play catch up to help him

Questioning Choices by Mystic Medjai - Complete

Fun day at the beach goes catastrophically bad and the fam has to make difficult decisions to keep Mikey alive. THIS THIS THIS!! If I could pour this into my veins for the perfectly paced plot and characterization...

When It Counts by Kallasilya - Complete

Short fic of Mikey stubbornly and bitterly proving his brothers wrong (+ Don being a good brother)

Favourite Disease by devirnis - Complete

Mikey is forced to save his brothers as his body gradually falls apart from the inside. SO GOOD UGH Mikey being forced to deal with situations on his own always show how far he can Shine!

Nowhere Boy by taizi - Complete

OOOH I dunno how I can summarize this without giving the plot away but just know Mikey pulls through by thinking of his family

To Fit the Crime by T33la - Complete

AHHH AHHHH AHHHHH AHHHHHHHH!! Mikey is accused of Murder and receives his sentence before his brothers can even jump to his defense! Oh the twists and turns of this murder mystery!!

you want to know why i sit and sigh (the night is so young it hurts) by love_killed_the_superstar - Complete

Angel and Mikey bonding over comics and unsupportive brothers So Cute)

imma be real with you (cause i started being real with me) by love_killed_the_superstar - Complete

Leo and Usagi being supportive of Mikey as he struggles to train for the upcoming Battle Nexus fight (and also maybe they flirt with each other a teensy bit)

just a hop, skip, and a jump away by baba_buoy - Complete

Mikey sick fic. Heart melting amounts of comfort UwU

Weak Link by yellowhollyhock - Complete

Sweet fic of Mikey feeling insecure about his place on the team, and Leo going through great lengths to prove him wrong like a good older brother :')

'Cause you are the sun, he is your moon/And though he can't speak, he will thank you soon by naivesilver - Complete

Post-Grudge Match Mikey waking up in the middle of the night bitter and sore and gods damn why's Raph awake, too?

Hunted by DysfunctionalRequest - Complete

Mikey wandering the woods alone in the middle of the night and having a VERY unfortunate encounter with hunters

Flipbook by T33la - Complete

Heartfelt moment between Mikey and Don concerning SAINW that makes me want to smash a cinder block against my head /pos

Dramaturgy by Completely_Unaware - Ongoing

Mind the tags! Mikey deals with a Battle Nexus loss in an unhealthy way (UmU)

The Red Means I Love You (Work) by AnonymousCritter - Ongoing

MIND THE TAGS! AU of Fast Forward. Mikey isn't saved from the traffickers in time and things spiral from there

The So-Called "Champion of the Battle Nexus" by 0ozero0 - Ongoing

Grudge Match canon divergence where Mikey gets hurt a little more seriously than in canon (but still wins)

2012:

Devil took your hand by moogsthewriter & taizi - Complete

Mikey mind controlled by the Shredder moment!! *laughs through my pain and tears and screaming*

walk with open hands by taizi - Complete

Mikey gets his hands on one of Renet's watches and things go topsy turvy from there (and it HURTS ME)

(un)reality by SpectrumWriting - Complete

Mind the Tags! Dimension X AU where Mikey is captured by the Kraang and is put through the wringer in more ways than one (OWIE)

evermore (Dimension X AU) series by coffeejellyenthusiast - Complete?

Mind the Tags! Mikey was in Dimension X for over a year and he's NOT OKAY

Gravitational Collapse series by Writing_In_Denial - Ongoing

MIND THE TAGS!! An Incredible it gets worse before it gets better series of Mikey being unintentionally abandoned by his brothers post-series and dealing with some Major Isolation and OOOGH IT HURTS ME SO MUCH BUT I WILL KEEP READING FOR THE EVENTUAL COMFORT

traveling so far to get there by taizi - Complete

Mikey and Raph getting stuck in an empty, post-apocalyptic world and struggling to survive (their BOND IN THIS IS SO SWEET WEH)

Rise:

nice, nice by postergirlsprank - Complete

Short fic of Casey Sr and Mikey bonding after an unfortunate encounter while on a snack run (Hey if you want more context for how this author writes Casey, go read his fic Imperfect Animals too heehoo)

either way, we're not alone by sinaesthesis - Complete

Mikey throughout the years of the Kraang Apocalypse (Lots of Loss and Hurt and Badassery)

going under by redhairedmuses - Complete

Mikey almost drowns during a fight with a mutant

Hyperactive Hypothermia by VeryAngryGremlin - Complete

After Mikey's winter wear accidentally goes in flames and a villain-enduced avalanche, Donnie struggles to keep his baby brother warm

that’s where the blood’s supposed to be! by Dragon_Scales_and_Fairy_Tales - Complete

With Raph and Leo constantly bickering, Mikey ignores a very serious injury after a fight with Meat Sweats

Clever Little Dino! by VeryAngryGremlin - Complete

Mikey trying to keep a robot pet a secret and suffering the consequences

Vs The World by DysfunctionalRequest - Complete

The aftermath of the Kraang strains the family's bonds, and Mikey feels hopelessly alone (and definitely isn't dealing with his trauma properly)

Empathy Amplified by Filsamek - Complete

When you accidentally use your powers to connect with your brothers' emotions then purposefully use them to ease their pain

Sunshine in the Rain by Carnati0n_bl00m - Complete

Probably the first fic I read after watching the Rise movie cuz I wanted to find something Mikey-centric involving Bishop and BOY does it deliver with the additional bonus of Leatherhead!! (also hey look fanart)

A Mystic Connection by rytheoneandonly - Complete

Mikey's mystic powers manifesting and evolving in ways he could never predict (aka Long Fic of Mikey stumbling to figure out why he wakes up exhausted and hurt every night)

The whole world in your corner series by GibbousLunation - Complete

Two fics of Mikey being Mikey and his bros being protective

Better Check Twice by Marz_Zero - Ongoing

Bishop captures a turtle with a bear trap (OW) and is an absolute bastard about it

Come Home Soon by Sherlock_Brolmes - Ongoing

With his brothers unavailable, Mikey (with the help of a former enemy) uncovers a massive conspiracy involving New York and the Hidden City. I LOVE THIS I LOVE SOLO DUO TEAM-UPS!!!! *PUNCHES THE AIR 13 TIMES*

Mikey's Artistic Guide to Dealing with Trauma and Fame by Origami_Nami - Ongoing

Mikey using graffiti as an outlet and accidentally becoming famous

Rook by unorthodoxx - Ongoing

Another Bishop fic of him outwitting the turtles to abduct one of them (Mikey)

Multi/Other:

Mystic Malfunction by VanillaVengeance - Ongoing

Rise Mikey accidentally portals himself to the 2012 Universe and struggles to survive and avoid this other version of his family (with mixed success). The progression of familial bonds in this is just *Chef's Kiss*

The Gauntlet by T33la - Complete

A mix of IDW & 03, a wonderful showcase of how Donnie and Mikey support each other (also, a cool invention and a big rocket and a terrifying near-death experience are involved)

I Get Knocked Down (But I Get Up Again) by Justalittleobsessed - Ongoing

MIND THE TAGS!!! Set in its own original iteration, Mikey has been immortal for as long as he can remember, and he's used to his occasional deaths (and revivals). But then his brothers find out... (AGH AGH THIS ALSO HURTS MEEEEE BUT OOGH the comfort and hope of the later chapters is so Worth It)

Whumptober 2023 series by Justalittleobsessed - Ongoing?

Collection of Mikey-centric one-shots from different iterations and feeling the HURT (Personal favorites are If Only the World Could Stop Spinning..., Just a Flesh Wound, and Not the Best of Days)

To Know Peace (You Gotta Let Go) by Deadpool1763492 - Ongoing (technically)

The Last Ronin Spoilers!! Mikey survives and whisks the new turtle tots away to live on a farm instead of being raised as soldiers. (AUUUUUU THE FEELS!! THE TOTS! MIKEYYYY!!!)

How to accidentally kidnap yourself several times over by Camildeni - Ongoing

Rise Mikey gets captured and accidentally summons other iterations (03, 12, and Bay) of himself trying to get out! They do NOT have a good time!! (but at least they have each other)

the dad diaries by angelmichelangelo - Ongoing

More TLR Mikey being a Dad (and dealing with his trauma sorta kinda)

The neighboring cell by SaltyYagi - Ongoing

2012 Mikey and Rise Leo trying to escape Dimension X together (and bonding)

Bonus Non-Mikey-centric:

Weathered Strings, Tethered Wings by Deadpool1763492 - Ongoing

(2003) SAINW AU!!! With the possibility of Don being alive dangled in front of them, the remaining turtles begrudgingly reunite to save him. Drew a cover for this with more art to come! LOVING the slow burn of reconciliation between these bitter old turtles UwU (Bitter Old Mikey my poor Bestie)

Mutant Nightmare by HamsterMasterSamster - Complete

(2003) The immediate aftermath of Worlds Collide

Hanging By A Turtle by CamsthiSky - Complete

(Rise) Literally the turtles struggling to get out of a deep pit they're hanging over

Shell Game by T33la - Complete

(2003) OKAY OKAY SO!!! OOGH Don encounters something Impossible while prepping a tracking device (for himself) and it snowballs into another Renet-involved time adventure (AND UMMM lots of existential contemplation and a surprise historical guest who's Very Cool)

Turtle Power by halogalopaghost - Complete

(2003) Immediate aftermath of the star ship reactor explosion in Exodus

Disposable by orphan_account (kudos to you wherever you are, author) - Complete

(2003) Bishop captures Don and Mikey and gives them a terrible choice

Dissection by AmevelloBlue - Complete

(2003) So much Comfort after the trauma of Worlds Collide (ie Don's interrogation and Mikey almost getting sliced open)

Find the Road by SillySocks - Complete

(2003) Perfect encapsulation of the family as they cope with Leo's absence while he trains with the Ancient One

Handle with Care by HamsterMasterSamster - Complete

(2003) April is seriously injured during a mission and has to deal with the turtles distancing themselves from her as she recovers

mind-body problem by hiraethseok - Complete

(2003) April and the Turtles Being Siblings the Fic

Healing in Tandem by Eggstasy - Complete

(2003) Canon divergence of Worlds Collide where Splinter is just a little too late to intervene before Bishop starts sawing into Mikey's shell

Let's Take Ibuprofen Together by GreenGoddessSmoothie - Ongoing

(2003) The turtles swap body and have learn to cope with each other's chronic pain

Not the Face I Know by GreenGoddessSmoothie - Ongoing

(2003) Mikey accidentally makes a wish that changes his family's lives forever (THEY'RE HUMAN THEY BECOME HUMAN AND THE PLOT IS COOL AND ALSO QUEER THEMES MY BELOVED)

The Great Skittle Heist of 2105 by AmevelloBlue - Ongoing

(2003) AU of Fast Forward where the Dark Turtles are babies instead and are very swiftly adopted by the Fam

The Labyrinth by HALFnHALF1 - Ongoing

(Mix of IDW/03) The Turtles wake up separated in a labyrinth with only a mysterious voice in their heads to guide them (and manipulate them)

“You didn’t tell me your extended family was in town!” by BoStaffsAreCool - Ongoing

Post-Turtles Forever. The 03 fam is Just beginning to wind down after the events of the movie and look who's knocking at April's door (the 87 turtles)

[missmarveledsblog]

Flumpy ( jake seresin x reader) part 9

summary : he can't let it end like this , truly and utterly he can't let this be the end , flumpy tells jake maybe he needs to think if a relationship is what he wants and give her space , cassie tries it again in the hard deck only this time jake stops it and shares his thoughts , rooster gives his two sense

warning : angst but fluffy ending because i'm sorry for the last part and am hoping this one gets me forgiven lol ,

A moment , just one moment she thought it was a horrible dream . That was til the sting of her now sore and dry eyes  and how cold and empty the bed was that really set the reality of things in . the thoughts of the woman all over jake , the accusations and venom from his lips hit her like a speeding train . how she felt coming home alone and crying herself to sleep . what was an amazing weekend turned to complete and utter shit show , one she wish never existed . she didn’t know what hurt more the way he let that woman think she could have him , the humiliation or the fact he thought she would do such a thing . 

She needed to get up , getting something into her sick riddled stomach and maybe just come back to bed for rest of the day . she dragged herself from the bed to her bathroom  the splash of cold water on her puffy face was soothing but the feeling in her stomach continued . maybe this was sign they weren’t meant to be or a cruel joke the universe was playing on  her . she pulled her door open startled slight at the incoming body or the thud to the ground . she wanted to feel bad as she looked down at the confused blonde,  the fact he fell asleep outside her door and how uncomfortable it must of been and yet when she looked at him all she saw was the tramp at the bar and the face of anger on jakes toward the one he was suppose to love . she was now pissed standing over him and storming to the kitchen even if her head , heart and eyes were hurting .

Jake never had gotten up so quick almost tripping over his feet as he ran to the kitchen . if he had to .. not had to he was prepare to fall to his knee and beg her to forgive him , beg her to let him make it right. 

“ baby i am so sorry shit sorry ain’t ever near enough to how much i fucked up , i trust you , i trust you with my life  he began . 

“ was that before or after that woman had her hands all over you , jake if you wanted to break up and catch up with an old fling you could of done so long before last night” she scoffed keeping her  back to him and her voice firm. 

“ no i wouldn’t  do that , i would never do that to you” . 

“ but you thought i would , you thought i would cheat on you,  you let that woman think she had a chance , you didn’t tell her no or to stop i was your girlfriend nah you thought better to turn the tables and humiliate me in front of our friends and everyone we work with , you made me look like a joke because i hug a man , a gay man i know from college , i would never do that on you , i would never made you feel the way you made me feel last night” she turned her eyes filling with tears ready to spill any second. “ maybe we need to think if this , us “ she stood turning away ready to head back to her room . 

“ i don’t want to break up , look i should of told cassie fuck off i shouldn’t of gotten so jealous  but seeing some guy so close and you putting your number in his phone and my head being a wreck already”  his own tears forming , his own voice cracking . 

“ you did that because a guy hugged me jake you don’t do that to someone you love” she cried he wanted to wrap her in his arms , hold her close to his chest but anytime he move closer she moved back. 

“ darling please i will do anything to make this right  , anything you want” he pleaded . 

“ give me space jake let me think about this” she sniffled . 

“I’m being deployed my head is messed up because i am being deployed, this is first time i have someone waiting for me come home  , a love that going to be waiting for me to get home , it’s killed me the thought of being away from you for three months and not being by your side but it’s killing me more that i’m coming home to nothing at all” he blurted out. 

“ my dad is maverick , my bestfriend and almost brother is rooster  i grew up around the navy  men i call my uncles i can handle deployment jake it would hurt but i can handle it and  do you not trust me to do that either , i need space ok just give me space” she walked off only for him to grab her hand. 

“ i trust you ,  i do really this is just new and i wasn’t thinking  but i do know it killing me more to know i may of lost my girl  , my life with you” . 

“ i need to think jake” was all she said pulling away from him  leaving him standing in the kitchen as tear streamed down his face and as she cried behind the door of her bedroom .

…..

It was hardest week of her life , she hated it not being able to be close to him , not having lunch in the back of his trunk or heading to the good duck park . she left the room every time he came into it , at work she was only giving him short answers even thought her heart panged with pain to just talk to him .  she couldn’t sleep either the bed felt so big and empty without him there , she felt sick all time her appetite was up and down  knowing they usually ate together it was just the worst time she could of been going through . 

“ hard deck tonight no excuses” nat told her walking out of the hanger before she could even answer . 

He felt rough , a week not knowing if he was ever going to make it right , she could barely look at him , barely speak to him it was a living hell .  his life felt empty and  even his performance was bad , it worst flying he’s ever done .  he done so many pushups this week he knew each part of gravel on the ground on a personal level .  he need to talk to her , he need to make it right some how .  just as he went to move towards the door she walked in with nat  . 

“ i didn’t know he was coming tonight” nat said but honestly not convincing anymore .

“ its fine come on” she moved past sitting in the corner those eyes that held so much love for him now filled with sadness and hurt.

“ jakey , there you are “ god why was this happening to him .

“ cassie fuck off really i’m here with my friends and my girlfriend “ he move back . 

“ last time didn’t seem like that “ she cooed reaching out to touch him only for jake to push her arm away. 

“ i love her ok , last time i should of told you that , shouldn’t have let you think less but that girl , that crazy will absolutely kick your ass , beautiful woman right there is the one i love more than anything” he said pushing past cassie altogether heading to y/n as  her eyes widened . 

“ baby you think i’m not ready for this and i wouldn’t blame you but you're wrong because i know nothing feels right without you being my girl ,  i hate waking up without you but mostly i hate going another second not having you being by my side , i’m serious  shit if i could i would marry you tomorrow “ the raw truth of his work falling like a dam was broken without him . 

“ marry me?” she gasped . “ you wanna marry me?” .

“ from the moment you put me in my place that day on the beach when we first met …face to  face” he nodded. 

“ hey asshole” a voice called only for jake to turn and a fist to connec to his face sending him to back . “ ok now you can continue i’ve said my peace” bradley shrugged moving to his friends . 

“ i deserved that” jake groaned rubbing his jaw. 

“ you did “ she agreed , “ lets talk outside” she stood handing him the napkin filled with ice.  “ oh and lady your lucky i’m not doing that to you” she stood looking at cassie. 

“ could of had a better time with me jakey” she cooed. 

“ fuck it” y/n muttered before well  doing what roo did sending the woman on her ass . “ now go talk” 

“ ugh my best friend is so hot” nat gushed. 

“ dude your boyfriend” 

“ i know my place” kyle laughed kissing his girls head. 

The night was calm well a lot more calm compare to start of the night as they walked down the beach it  was minutes but it felt like an eternity . til she stopped  sitting on the now cool down sand as the night time breeze flowed through her hair. 

“ you really meant it” she said breaking the silence . 

“ every single word and if you give me the chance i swear along as i’m breathing i will make it up to you” nodded .

“ you can’t flip when you see me interact with other men you need to trust me and talk to me when your feeling any type of way” she said softly . “ when you  propose  nothing too flashy  and big” she smirked only for him to push her on her back , attacking her face with kisses . 

“ or you say you’ll marry me now and i’ll get you a ring another time” he said leaning over her . “ i was dead serious  your it for me til we’re old as hell  still going to that good duck park” he kissed her lips softly. 

“ you’re crazy , this is crazy but i’m more crazy about you even if your an idiot but this week been hell without you  but before i say yes next year we’re doing couple costumes to the convention of my choosing” she arched her brow. 

“ i did say anything” he chuckled 

“ then yes jake  i will marry you , just not tomorrow we have work “ she smiled pulling him into a kiss . 

“ the day after works too” he winked .

part ten

taglist : @harrysgothicbitch @djs8891 @emma8895eb @darksparklesficrecs

[exhelluvafan]

The thing that irritates me the most about Helluva Boss is the adamant need to waste any potential for depth in every character. The thing that stops me from abandoning this train wreck of a show and feeling total apathy for it is its wasted potential.

TOO MUCH FUCKING WASTED POTENTIAL.

And obviously, the elephant in the room, aka the blatant misogyny and double standards because viv is writing yaoi so the fans could consume the emotional uwu moments and porn. SO MUCH PORN DAMN IT.

And the thing that eats away at me is the characters such as stolas and stella had such an easy chance to be morphed into something so deep that the show could be a soap opera about their drama alone.

In my humble opinion, the Goetia demons shouldn't have been in this show at all. They belong in a show like Hazbin that's showcasing the upper echelon of hell. This should've been about IMP, but I'm not ripping that one bandaid off because the wound under it is a biohazard. Anyway, I wanted to offer a rewrite for the 😍 lovely poor uwu baby Stolas and his DEMON, BITCH OF A WIFE, Stella. (Yeah, the sarcasm's strong with this one)

First of all I love how her name means star 🌟. It ties in together nicely with the whole astrology aesthetic of the family. We're gonna ignore the born-to-be-a-bitch personality the show presented her as having and focus on what caused her issues.

First of all, she probably knew from a young age that she was going to be wed off into an arranged marriage (just like stolas), and she knew she had the responsibility of birthing an heir. That's going to affect how she views love and marriage in general. She'd see it as a transaction, that she can offer an heir and her body, and receive what she wants. I have no problem with her being a spoiled brat, a mean girl. In fact, take it up a notch. She can be both of that! She was probably given every materialistic thing she wanted since the day she was born other than love and affection. That probably made her narcissistic and selfish, with the "I get everything that I want and you can't stop me" attitude.

She's a party girl, and we stand for that. She seems to be very extroverted and outgoing, and that clashes with stolas' more subdued and introverted personality.

I see her as being EXTREMELY paranoid about appealing to the high society that she's a part of and keeping herself at the top of the food chain amongst other aristocrats, unlike stolas who only does it to keep face or avoid getting too much attention, she wants to be noticed ans seen. Her gossipy, high society friends also reinforce the fact that she never had normal friends who cared about her, and she never grew out of her mean girl phase.

I see her as someone with so much passion in her heart, and sadly, we had to see all that turned into rage. She has trouble controlling her temper and the constant rage that boils inside her, and she explodes and lashes out on people, especially stolas.

I see her going into a marriage with stolas with the same "I'll get what I want" attitude. He has power, money, and legions to his name, and he isn't necessarily bad looking. So stella is like, "Eh, might as well..."

He isn't her dream partner, but she goes into the marriage thinking she can mould him into her dream man. Or thinking he's meek enough to leave her on her own, or she could even manipulate him to do as she pleases. None of those go as planned, though.

.

.

.

I can lowky see her dragging him around as she shops and him just wanting to die inside, lol

Oh my, Anon, this quite a lot of words, but I actually really love your rewrite, I can see Stella actually watching Mean Girls while Stolas dies inside and just stares at the infinite lmao

But sadly, this is a Viv show, and you know that women in these kinds of shows aren't allowed to have any nuance beyond a one-note use or personality trait, unless they're stepping stools for the male cast, which in that case, they're allowed to have a bit more of depth, but not too much.

And yeah, actually, now that you mention it, the Goetia demons shouldn't have been in Helluva, if anything, they should've been shown on Hazbin, like you said, because we are following along a protagonist that was born in royalty (Charlie) and it would make a lot of sense to see the Goetia demons there, since it would be a royal meetup or something like that.

And lastly, about the porn... I can corroborate this since a lot of the designs made by Viv or by her team look... conventionally attractive, so conventional that's artificial and try hard at times, and also, pretty safe but sometimes pushing the limits a bit to pander to gay people (Vortex, Asmodeus and Satan, to name a few muscular characters that are quite popular, but also Moxxie, Chaz and Striker, also popular in the gay side of the fandom) but it always boils down to the same purpose: to get people horny, and this is exemplified so painfully clear when Loona shook her ass towards the camera in one of the episodes, turning out to be shameless furry bait, and when I say that these shows are gooning and softcore porn shows, it's because of deliberate shit like this.

But alas, thanks for your input, Anon, it's greatly appreciated and it's quite the palette cleanser to see someone competent pick up Viv's mess and restructure it into something actually compelling and nuanced.

[lockes-woods]

Kinktober '24 Day 13

Request: Ace x AFAB ENBY reader. Reader catches Ace masturbating and edges him as punishment. Sir! Reader, Dom! Reader, punishment, overstimulation.

Requested By : Author's Choice

WARNING: PIV, Cockwarming, Masturbation, Edging, Inappropriate Use Of A Devil Fruit, Overstimulation, Dom! Reader, Sir kink, Punishment.

A/N: Hope you enjoy some Dom! Reader ^-^ I still can't believe I fell asleep while writing last night. Like my laptop was still open when I woke up lol.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Fuck, Sir I’m sorry. It won’t happen again ngh-” Ace whined, another orgasm lost, from his spot splayed out on your shared bed. He looked like a vision, a thin layer of sweat covered him from head to toe, his dark hair spread out around him like a halo, and his pretty cock with an irritated head standing at attention. You had been edging him for the better part of an hour, while not its intended use your devil fruit power did come in handy when it came to disciplining your boyfriend.

 Your devil fruit gave you the ability to psychically tap into other’s brains. You were only able to tap into a singular part of the brain at a time, and you had to be within distance to do so. Your current upward limit was 5 people, but that limit has grown with you. When you first gained the fruit’s power you were only able to control one person from a fairly short distance. Currently, you were controlling your boyfriend’s cerebellum; you had total control of his movements. He was stuck paralyzed by you as you controlled his access to his cock. Every time you released his body from your control he would rush to try to finish before you would step in.

“Oh? And why should I believe you?” You asked from your seat in the desk chair at the foot of the bed.

“Fuck, b-because I’ll-I’ll.” He started, you just quirked an eyebrow at your younger partner.

“Fuck, please Sir” Ace panted, bailing on his train of thought, “I-I can’t, I need to cum,” he whined, his eyes locked in on you.

“Do you need to use your safe word?” you asked, giving him an out.

“Ngh, No, no Sir, I just, I just need it” he panted.

You hummed as you processed his request. While he may be in control of you as the second commander of white beard’s fleet, there was no questioning your authority behind closed doors. Ace was normally good about not breaking the rules, but today he had fucked up. You had switched shifts as look out for one of your fellow crewmates before making your way back to what you would assume would be an empty cabin where you could take a nap. What you found instead was Ace fisting his cock, bordering on completion. Milliseconds before he was going to cum you locked down his movements. Which led you to now, perched on a chair at the foot of the bed, toying with your love as you saw fit. 

You kept a neutral face, and your thighs closely locked together, so as not to give away how desperate you were for his cock. Gods knows that your lover didn’t need any help with his self-esteem department. You released him once again, watching with bated breath how close he’d get this time. You counted to 5 in your head before locking his body once more, his hand still wrapped tightly around his base.

“Fuck,” he moaned, tears of frustration pricking at the corners o his eyes.

“Sir-,” he begged, mind going hazy as he panted.

“Okay baby, I’m gonna give you two options.” You said, “You can either cum now in your hand or continued to get edged and cum inside of me.”

Ace could only groan in response. While neither of you wanted a baby Ace’s favorite place to cum was deep inside you. It gives him a sense of control and claim to you since he’s the only one who has ever had that privilege.

“Please ride me, Sir,” he panted, already sounding wrecked, “Fuck wanna fill you up.”

You nodded with a smile as you began to strip out of your clothing. You purposefully took your time as you and Ace shared unobstructed eye contact. His vision only shifted as you slipped out of your binder, your breast bounced before setting against your chest. While he never wanted to make you uncomfortable, or at the very worst make you dysphoric he loved your chest. He loved leaving love bites there, the weight on his tongue as when he was stimulating your nipples, and how soft your skin was there. Your binder use inadvertently saved the skin on your chest from the roughness of being on the sea. His focus stayed there as you slipped out of your underwear and began to crawl up your bed. He let out a whine as you straddled his tone thighs, right below where he wanted you.

“Fuck, Sir,” he whined, he wanted nothing to move you grab you, and fuck you hard and fast.

“Baby, I’m gonna let you lose for a second so you can move your hand, then I’ll get started, okay?” You asked, you stayed strong as he looked up at you with puppy dog eyes. He did as you directed before you froze him once again. You let out a gasp as you started to descend on his cock. Ace couldn’t help but moan as his cock breached your pussy. He could feel you like normal but was unable to do anything to save the ache of his cock. You kept a steady pace as you lost yourself in the sensation of the stretch of his girthy cock.

“Fuck~,” you moaned as he finally bottomed out.

“Sir, fuck please release me I’ll be such a good boy; PLEASE,” Ace groaned, simultaneously with you, on the edge of pleasure.

“You ready baby?” you asked, peering down at him. Flat-out ignoring his plea. He could only whimper in response.

A gasp punched through his chest as you started to ride him in earnest. You kept freezing and unfreezing him like flicking on and off a light switch. He kept his hands firmly planted on your hips as you crept closer and closer to your release.

“Fuck,” you moaned, Ace groaned at the sight of you playing with your chest. You were so close. You managed to freeze Ace one last time as you clamped down hard on his cock riding your orgasm. He could only whine in response, somehow equally overstimulated and unfulfilled.

“Think, you learned your lesson baby?” You asked, smirking down at him; his cock still lodged deep inside of you.

“Yes,” He whined. You leaned down and gave his lips a peck as you unreleased your hold fully.

“Take what you need baby, you took your punishment like such a good boy.” You finally relented. A surprised gasp escaped you as he held your hips in a bruising grip before flipping you over into a missionary position. He pulled you into a demanding kiss, while he trusted back into you hard. You let out a pathetic whimper at the feeling of his cock dragging against your walls.

“Fuck,” You moaned, orgasm quickly approaching. You were now the overstimulated one. You let out a loud cry as you came clenching down on him like a vice. You fell onto your back limp as he continued to thrust into you, without breaking pace.

“Fuck, want it Sir, Fuck want so bad,” he panted. “Wanna cum deep in your cunny.”

“Fuck, baby you’ve been such a good boy, cum wherever you like.” You whined.

By the time Ace relented, you were a whimpering overstimulated mess. He let out a loud moan, hips stuttering, as he came deep inside you. You shared a soft kiss as he came down from his high. He crumpled against your chest as he caught his breath, still lodged deep inside you. You lovingly brushed his hair out of his face, lightly scratching his scalp as you went.

“You, feeling okay baby?” you asked, hand moving to rub gently up and down his back.

“Mmhmm,” he hummed burrowing further into your chest.

“Ace,” you said in a warning tone.

“I feel okay,” he finally verbally answered, before going back to resting his face in your cleavage. A smile graced your lips as you could feel his breathing even out against your chest. You pecked the top of his head before you joined him for a nap, with him still lodged deep inside your warm cunt.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MASTERLIST

A/N: Stay tuned for Jealous! Zoro x AFAB! Reader later today! ^-^

P.S. I took Saturday off so the Shikamaru fic scheduled then will be coming out sometime in the next few days.

[zarkishere]

give me your thoughts on the callanders pls

OUGFHHH I WILL !!!

soon (monday lol) the designs i made will be posted with some hcs so im sorry if i repeat some 😭😭

i think they both have naturally VERY LOUD VOICES like Karen constantly tells them to quiet down and they're like " HUH?? IM NOT YELLING--oh. nvm. " - this cuz of the thing Karen says of missing telling the boys to shut up. they yap a lot and they yap LOUDLY when they're home - Davey fights it more i think. like if he's feeling like being annoying he'll talk louder just because fuck you. (it makes Mac laugh too) - Mac's laugh is also just VERY LOUD while Davey wheezes and starts tearing up

they're a bad influence on Sean(?) like Sean is a bit mischievous by himself but together they're a NIGHTMARE because Mac and Davey will literally do whatever the fuck and Sean is like 'i wanna go too!!' - they're not allowed to go on missions alone because Shit Will Happen and they frustrate the hell out of Arthur. - one time Arthur almost had a nervous breakdown trying to get them back home. He'd be dragging one to the horses, be like 'alright, stay here', he leaves to get another, comes back...and whoever was there Is No Longer There (at some point Mac got sober enough he helped with Davey) (Davey said in a very sad drunk voice 'you betrayed me' and Mac's heart broke)

i hc Mac was a little shorter than Arthur Davey is a little shorter than Mac and a lil thinner too (you'll see that tho)

they brawl. give them 5 bucks and they will beat each other up just for funsies (and the money) - they used to defend it by saying they're just practicing - it almost worked. - folk aren't allowed to egg them on anymore. (looking at you, Jenny)

they understand each other in an almost mystical way no one else understands. they'll be in complete opposite sides on a mission and SOMEHOW know what the other is gonna do and how to help - usually they go together, though. you'd never see one without the other.

Davey doesn't remember much of Scotland so when he can't sleep he'll ask Mac to tell him stories of the place and their parents - Davey DOES remember the railway and secretly really likes trains

Davey actually hates cheating (unless Mac is playing, but he only cheats with Mac to fuck with him) - Mac tells him he's cheating when they play poker if he's losing and Davey gives him a silent glare every time

Mac literally keeps literally everything Davey gives him. He once lost a nice rock and was THIS 🤏 CLOSE to start wrecking shit if he didn't find it - it was in the back pocket of a pair of pants he forgot he used the day before - Davey cried laughing at him and Mac got really embarrassed

they argue a lot (like brothers do), but they always end up forgiving each other and patting each other on the back - (really hard, for the record. don't get a pat in the back from them, they'll split your spine in two)

Davey gets really jealous and Mac teases him about it. Like, if Mac happens to spend 'too much time' with Bill or someone else (more than 10 minutes HJKASGJASG), Davey will go over and give a NASTY glare while tapping his foot on the floor with arms crossed. - Mac pretends not to notice at first but usually relents

actually, in general they're a bit too codependent (more Davey than Mac, but they both are) - when they got separated in blackwater they both panicked REALLY BADLY and Davey had to be dragged away because even as he was bleeding out he was kicking and screaming that he couldn't bear the thought that something was happening to Mac and he couldn't help - while Mac was getting tortured by the Pinkertons he asked if Davey was okay and his last few words were him apologizing to Davey for fucking up - Davey's last words were also him apologizing to Mac for being so stupid. the whole ride to Colter he blamed himself for being too reckless and getting them split up

on a happier note i think Davey's love language is words of affection - but they're very passive-aggresive

Mac's love language is gift giving - but he won't tell it was him

[theconstantsidekick]

no because, supernatural is absolutely a train wreck. it's a colossal accident that is happening in front of you that you can't look away from. it is homophobic and non-sensical and downright laughable at times but you know what? I love it. I absolute love it.

season 1 was absolutely beautiful. you don't understand, really, you don't. they had a piss poor budget, you can see that in every frame. but does that stop it from being fucking beautiful? no. it is stylised and ambitious and a fucking visual treat.

and this is like the first fucking episode. the shots have so much character! and that's nothing to say of the characters themselves. from the first fucking scene you can clearly distinguish sam and dean's character clear as day. their motivations, their dreams, their hopes, all of it. it's established so well. their dynamic is unmatched. does it also have a lot of garbage? yes for sure. because what in the name of hell was that episode with bugs? what glue were they sniffing when they green lit that one? no seriously... I wanna try some.

but then they recovered, cause they did faith. my god, what an episode. WHAT AN EPISODE. that motherfucking reaper haunts my every waking hour

like yeah, I love me some baby dean and baby sam going on their small scale ghost hunts while learning deep lessons about who they are as people and what they want from life.

also that 'laugh I nearly died' needle drop? where sam sees jess? god tier editing, GOD TIER.

then they came back with season 2. and here is my most controversial opinion that should not be controversial at all, season 2 is the best season of supernatural to ever supernatural.

what is and what should never be, hollywood babylon, heart, nightshifter, and the whole fucking season actually. not a single miss in my humble opinion. and that finale? THAT FINALE. beautiful, magnificent. ground breaking character writing, everything comes full circle while simultaneously opening up new plot lines to explore.

and my god, yellow eyes is an epic villain. he is a very viciously written villain like, he's... my god. it ain't a walk in the park writing villains, believe you me patient readers, villains are harder to write than the protagonists, always. well, at least the compelling ones are.

now season 3 suffered because of the writer's strike, but didn't miss much either. like yeah some of the hits don't hit as hard as the season 2, but hey, mystery spot, time is on my side, ghostfacers, bedtime stories are nothing to laugh about. those episodes are fucking solid, like most of the season. and there is so much raw emotion is sam's need to save dean, it just makes my weak winchester brothers loving heart throb a little too hard. also...

need I say more?

does the show did look little more washed out and boring? yes. but it's cool, cause we're moving on to season 4.

listen, I kinda just wanna leave all my season's critique at this. i mean, yeah this. this is it. this is the long and short of it; castiel. i don't think i need to get anymore into it

so season 5 is just—

i'm kidding. obviously i'm gonna talk about season 4, at length.

listen, being able to introduce angels this late in the game and then have them be a such perfectly hidden players is a masterstroke of genius. it just is. i am a writer guys... apart from the relentless fanfic as well lol. and when i tell you, introducing a new big player which is also (not so) secretly the next big bad and playing it off as smoothly as they did in season 4, is beyond hard. but the biggest home run these fuckers hit is castiel and the best part is they weren't aiming for a one lol. and oh oh, the way they use their very VERY limited budget to show wings with just flashing the fucking light? CINEMA! that's fucking cinema right there man. i work on film sets, i am telling you, this is the smartest filmmaking choice they make on the entire show. it adds so much visual intrigue while being so awfully easy to execute. BRILLIANt.

now i cannot talk about supernatural without talking about the deancas romance of it all, which i understand not everyone can see or wants to, which is fine. to each their own. you consume art the way you want to, i don't care much as long as you can acknowledge that castiel and dean's friendship was just some of the best written television that mankind has ever seen. is that too grand a statement? yes. does that make it any less true? no.

they even brought back the moody lighting.

and then there's the episodes this season, most of which are home runs in their own regard. just like beautiful writing, the character development for cas, for dean, for sam, even the late john winchester is wild. anna is a wonderful addition, so is uriel, and alastair? they don't make villains like him anymore, they just fucking don't. AND THAT GODDAMN PLOT TWIST AT THE END? man! the finale was just... too good. Chuck's introduction is absolutely wonderful, even if they ruin him by the end but that happens a decade later so wtv, who cares? But,,,, Jimmy. Fucking. Novak. That's all. that's the tweet. yeah. i'm gonna end the season 4 fan fair with jimmy.

moving to season 5.

subjectively speaking, this is my fucking favorite. this season is a writer's dream while also being their goddamn nightmare. so many WONDERFUL characters to play with and such a grand plot but you get to see it all on a very small, consumable scale which is just... it's too smart for me to not mention. i won't start naming the plot points and neither will i name my favourite episodes because what even is the point? all of it was fucking perfect. you don't understand how hard it is to develop characters to such an extent that they become so familiar to the audience that they know their next move before you even put it on the screen. and supernatural had that. they tied everything together with so much care and consideration, just... AAAH so good.

a special shoutout goes to endverse!cas, crowley and death this season. you all know it in your bones that those three were just the absolute scene stealers. especially death's introduction... immaculate.

they did lose a few points for not being as aesthetically pleasing as the past few seasons but hey, gabriel was enough to make a smooth recovery.

but this... this is the end of the road for me people. season 5 is where it should have ended. in no way shape or form am i saying that there aren't a few good episodes here and there after this, because there are. i think season 5 was so fucking solid, tied up so many goddamn lose ends and then just put a cute little hell shaped bow on top and i just... yeah. this was and should have been the end of the road. do not get me wrong, i love me some jack kline, charlie bradbury, kevin tran, rowena macleod and eileen lahey but were they worth the bullshit ending i had to sit through? not really.

i absolutely think if there weren't more episodes of supernatural I would never have become a destiel fan, because i started shipping them when dean made cas a mixtape in season TWELVE! but my god, the good times were so scattered amongst the horseshit that even when i found those hidden gems, they were so fucking drenched in the stink that they lost their value.

the worst of it all is that, i cannot explain to you what supernatural means to me in a million words, because it is a part of me, heart and soul. i fucking AM castiel. i am a gay little angel you hear me? i love this show. i do. i'm glad it went on for however long it did but i feel like once in a while i need to write shit like this or read shit like this to remind myself of the show that it used to be. of it's beautiful cinematography, of it's clever little storytelling techniques. of it's wonderful cast. of how epic their song choices used to be.

FUcking RENEGADE? iconic. wanted, dead or alive? cannot hear the song without hearing sam's off tune goat bleating that he called singing along.

i need to remind myself of how afraid i used to be of lucifer. of how much i cried while watching dark side of the moon; when dean and sam burst the crackers, and how i learnt the lyrics to knocking on heaven's door just because of that scene.

sometimes i just have to walk through memory lane and look back at gabriel's death, the good one, the only one. it was so fucking meaningful. i have to think of "we are making it up as we go" to be able to breathe properly because those moments were so fucking beautiful.

fuck the big ones, i even remind myself of the small ones, of dean's handwriting being in all caps, just like him. of sam's fucking huge laptop with that weird blue black sticker in the middle. of castiel's tie, that just was the right shade of blue, and hung all wrong but just naturally enough to add so much more to his character than any fucking dialogue could. every small little detail of supernatural that made it so damn supernatural. i miss it all.

idk. i'm rambling. whatever.

[islandtarochips]

Heyo girl! I was just thinking about an interaction between Koa and post-Bell Diana/Annika and I wanted to hear your thoughts 😭

We’ve discussed Diana running away to New Zealand and reconnecting with Koa after the nukes hit, so I’ve been thinking about how the first interaction would go!

(TW out of decency: implied suicidal ideation)

Diana would be fully convinced that Koa hates her, and would be repeatedly apologizing for everything she’s ever done wrong. Things she’s done even before she became Bell, or even before she became a Perseus operative.

After having a nice, long mental breakdown, Diana confesses to Koa that she doesn’t want to be alive anymore after everything she’s done. Diana ends up begging him to kill her cause she’s too scared to do it herself.

How would Koa react to the absolute emotional train wreck she is? Let me know your thoughts 🤭

Talofa Liberty! Been a LONG time that I've seen your ask in here! Lol. And I would gladly write down of how Koa feel about Diana/Annika!

Ok, so! After Diana/Annika had said where Perseus is at. Which it's in Dulag! I know she would have told or beg Koa to leave instead of taking this mission. He felt a bit strange from this but understood it. So he tries to make an excuse of telling Adler that he can't take this mission. I'm...still thinking of WHAT kind of excuse that he should tell the team. We'll get back to that later.

And he went. He doesn't exactly understand WHY would the kid tell him to not come. Until he saw the news about the nukes. Which completely SHOCKED him. He doesn't know how to feel when he figured that Diana/Annika told him to leave because of THIS.

Until like maybe a few weeks or a month later, Koa had heard a knock on his door. He went to answer it and stood there shockingly to see her. He was about to ask her something before he saw her crying and breaking down as she started to apologize for everything she had done.

She explained to him about how she got her memories back and how she worked for Perseus. He could see the shame and regrets in her eyes.

And when she started to beg Koa to kill her. That's when he started to stop her and hugged her instead. Hugging her so tightly as if he doesn't want to let her go. And said this...

"DON'T. Don't you ever fucking asked me to do that. NEVER in your life. You may have made mistakes and you may have caused PAIN to others. But...you are just a child...being used by the man who hurt you so much."

Koa will keep on hugging her tightly and keep talking to her to calm her down.

"You deserve SO much more than death. And...that's why...I'm giving you a chance to live with me."

Don't know how she'll react but I know she'll be sobbing right now to hear those words from him. Koa will be happy to have her. Which means she needs to find another identity. She can keep ACTUAL name, Annika, if she wants to. While Koa has to find a way to get new documents for her.

So imagined him asking his Colonel for help and will take FULL responsibility if anyone found out her TRUE identity. The Colonel trusted Koa and helped him and Diana/Annika for their documents. He even gave the two an adoption paper just in case anyone asked about their relationship since Annika looks different then Koa.

And after everything is done! The two lived their happy lives together! However, Koa will still have to be in the army. I don't exactly know if Diana/Annika is going to do. Maybe finding a job? Or joined the army with Koa? Up to you of how you wanted her to live her life in New Zealand!

I hope this is ok for your question, Liberty! And I enjoy seeing the two having a father and daughter relationship! It makes me feel like Koa deserves a second chance though! Hope you have a nice day/evening! Love ya, pele!

[yandere-fics]

♡ What Are Their Kinks ♡

♡ The City Version ♡

(Excluding Veronia because I just did a whole alphabet for her that goes into more detail.)

♡ Overstimulation. Way more than anyone else on this list. She's gonna make you faint before she's satisfied. You're gonna wake up to her teasing you because she was unable to get her fill of you so you have to make up for that. ♡

♡ Definitely has a master thing going on but not explicitly. Loves abusing her power at random time to make every advisor leave the room so she can have you, but unfortunately they still have to stay in the hallway outside since the meeting has to resume after she finishes with you. ♡

♡ Oh and by the way, you'll have to sit on her lap, completely wrecked and covered in her cloak for the rest of the meeting, think of it as aftercare. The advisers put up with it because she's a very good leader and if this is what it takes to keep such a powerful leader on the throne, then they'll turn a blind eye and she loves knowing that they're forced to turn a blind eye to all of it. ♡

♡ Being as she's from a more modern world, and she has funds and magic at her disposal now, she can use that power to create any toy she wants but so much better. She loves toys. Has a whole collection of ones catering exclusively to your body. ♡

♡ It's accidental overstimulation, not necessarily her kink, she just has to keep going because a new shipment of her designs came in and she wants to test them out so badly. ♡

♡ A minor aftercare kink because it's just so nice and sweet and intimate. She wants to ruin you so that way after it's done she'll have you nice and complacent for her. ♡

♡ Exhibitionism. She doesn't want people to look at you two together but she loves doing it in places that people might walk in. Might get a bit degrading but you can ask her to stop and she'll feel bad and won't degrade you anymore unlike the other yandere's who like degrading. ♡

♡ This is no surprise but romantic night where she spreads flowers and lights candles for the two of you get her going more than anything. ♡

♡ Thigh riding. Particularly when she's just finished training, all the knights are out of the court so it's just you two. It has all her favorite things. It's so intimate because she has just proven her strength to you, her perfect lover, people could possibly walk in, although probably not since she did order them to go away, and she has you all to herself. You just look so cute whining that riding her thigh isn't enough stimulation. ♡

♡ Blood. That much should be obvious. She sits in her tower experimenting with the compounds in blood all day, it's no wonder that she might get off on experimenting with blood with her darling. Her blood, she can't hurt her precious baby girl. But she does want to drink yours if you would let her. No, what it's totally for research purposes. She's like Connor in Detroit Become Human, she must taste the blood to analyze it. She's not getting off on it, totally. Yeah let's go with that explanation. ♡

♡ Aphrodisiacs, with your consent beforehand. She likes the woozy feeling, and she'll even take them with you, but she wants to make sure you want it before so she's not taking advantage of you. I mean your love is obviously mutual and she wants to keep it that way. Doing it without asking could make you fall out of love at first sight if you discover you dislike her pushiness(So this is where she draws the line on pushiness, like damn she's always pushing your boundaries lol) ♡

♡ I mean magic but that's been said before. She can create magic gadgets that are even better than the things that Elisha creates, these bad boys are gonna wreck your soul. Not even joking, god is probably looking away in shame. ♡

[never-not-ever]

I was just cutting something and it wasn't straight so I went to trim it and I was hit with this memory when I was inpatient and my favorite nurse was cutting telfa and I was like "can you just trim it to make it even" and she was like "no, here's some radical acceptance practice for ya". She was such a bitch, at times lol, like in a good, helpful way and I think I might have called her a bitch once or twice. It might have started during our Rummy games. I remember one time she was behind the nurses station and it's like all glass windows and I forget what I did, it wasn't anything bad, maybe I said something sarcastic or snarky to her and walked away but when I looked back I could see her call me a bitch and I think I faintly heard it. I walked back and I was open mouthed in a joking way and was like "did you just call me a bitch?" and she was like "yea ,you... blah blah blah" I can't remember... Ugh, I miss her so much...

I remember another time when we were playing cards we were having a check in sort of and this was back like before Christmas I think, so again I forget the actual conversation but I think it had to do with grief and me losing my Aunt and her losing her Mom. She shared a little bit but didn't overshare cause she said something about "having good boundaries (and gave me a look cause of my past) and she wasn't about to trauma bond" with me. It's like I knew she understood a lot and she was constantly saying how a lot of people go into the field because they either know someone or have some personal experience. She was honestly the best nurse.

While we're on the memory train... *trigger warning* self harm, restraints... I remember in the beginning of my March 1:1 and I was in the bathroom and she had said "if you don't stop, I will restrain you". I don't know if I ever talked about that on here.. but that was so hard to hear because I used to hear my coworkers (nurses, never counselors) tell our patients that and then here I was being threatened with it. I talked to her after that about how if the chair was brought to me and I stopped would they still restrain me and she said "if you stopped then no". A couple weeks prior she had said to me in a bathroom "I have never seen someone so intent on hurting themself". So much shit happened in bathrooms. Anytime I went in staff was alway on alert, even after I got moved to 15s. She said the "hurting themself" piece in a validating way because I always said how it was never enough, never deep enough, never bad enough, never enough...

UGHHHH need to stop this memory train wreck. It went from a simple memory to the worst memories.

[showyoumyfavoriteobsession]

Finished my Mr. Robot rewatch the other night... thoughts

First of all like. God this show fucking rules. It may not be my most favorite show or the show I have the most to say about, but I think it may be the most consistently high-quality show I've ever watched. They had a vision, they knew the story they wanted to tell, and they executed on it and barely ever dropped the ball.

The only thing that I liked significantly less this time was honestly some of the political commentary, and that's more due to the ~changing times~ than the show itself. The grand conspiracy stuff, all the parts about how a shadowy group (led by a Chinese government official) controlled the world and installed autocrats and owned governments, it all just reads very differently post-COVID. Obviously there were conspiracy theories in 2015-2019, but it feels like the show validates them in a way that's kind of uncomfortable now that they're so much more mainstream.

I also am a lot more familiar with DID than I was the first time I watched, so I had a better handle on what exactly was happening between all of Elliot's personalities. The finale, which I remembered being good but somewhat confusing, was much more clear - Mr Robot and Krista pretty much sit down and Explain It All To You, and while the show doesn't use terms like "fronting" and "integration," having that general knowledge made things very understandable. This is a show that learned from the mistakes of Lost (a show that I love deeply) - they make it VERY clear in the last episode which parts are real and which aren't, that what happened in the show actually happened and while there's room for a little ambiguity, it doesn't affect what was real and what wasn't.

I mentioned in another post that I love how every character is a freak, and I stand by that analysis, but I have to emphasize it in particular for the women on this show. The women are so interesting and well-written and fully-realized, and a lot of that comes from the contrast between their strengths and their weaknesses. I love that Darlene puts up a cold front and pushes people away because she's insecure but she's desperately looking for someone to trust. I love that Angela is her foil, someone who's trusting to the point of constantly people-pleasing and being manipulated and tries to make space for her own needs. I love that Dom is a relentless investigator whose brain is always working in overdrive, to the point where she's an absolute train wreck in private, who can't sleep and can't make friends and barely has time to eat or clean. I could go on for every character in the whole show, of all genders, but women are so often neglected in shows like this that it's great to see them full-fledged.

Elliot's closing monologue really got me this time; I've been having a bit of a rough time brain-wise so a good dose of "even when you mess up and make bad decisions and push people away, you are still worthy of love and happiness and the world is changed just by having you in it" was something I really needed to hear tbh. I really love Elliot's character, and especially that he has this optimistic streak that feels so rare for a generally very dark show. Even when his more proximate motivation is revenge or anger, he does everything while believing that he can improve the world, that everyone deserves to be happy and free.

Anyway! I don't have a good way to wrap this up lol, long rambly meta over. I feel like I've drifted away from actually posting meta/general analysis/personal thoughts here because I'm pretty uninterested in engaging in The Discourse, but that just means I end up writing in my Google docs and no one ever sees it, so I might try to start posting more of this stuff again.

[penforthewin]

I wonder if we'll get Noob Saibot in the next game. It'll be sad to see Bi-Han die but Noob Saibot is so cool. I'm also very curious about the fates of other characters like Stryker and Kabal (love kabal) in this timeline. I want to see Jade! And I can't wait to have Shujinko and Hanzo as playable. I'm just very impatient for the next game lol

I think Noob has been confirmed for MK1's dlc, so your wish may come true soon. Jade has been referred to as Countess Jade by an interaction between Kitana and Geras, so we know she's bebopping around somewhere (yay!)

I'm curious to see how characters like Stryker, Kabal, and other characters like Kano and the Black Dragons could be introduced. If Liu Kang's treatment of Shang Tsung (bro was just a loser lmao) and Quan Chi (bitterness justified imo), he probably tried to erase the Black Dragon organization and give Kano a more low-key life.

Kabal's arcade ending shows that he's happy to live his life with a wife, kids, and a dog. Yes, he's super rich and armed to the teeth at all times, but we expect nothing less from MK11 Kabal. (Found this meme while looking up his ending to confirm the existence of the dog, and it's too funny to not include. Thank you, TyrionGoldenLion on reddit)

We already have Stryker in a way, so we can expect him to have a role in the new era. With Kabal being his partner/homie, we'll hopefully see him, too. Kabal has also appeared in Mortal Kombat Onslaught, so NRS isn't ready to throw his character away just yet.

Kung Lao's ending focused on him training Shujinko, so much so it feels like it's just as much his ending as it is Kung Lao's. And he already has a character model, so he may show up in the dlc. Dunno if he'll be like Shang Tsung and just be cosplaying as a senior citizen or will have the same backstory as the og Shujinko, but we'll find out.

I think if we see lil Hanzo, he should be the new Sub-Zero.

NOW HEAR ME OUT! Bi-Han becomes Noob Saibot somehow, so now we got a Scorpy but no Subbo.

Now, what's a franchise to do? Kuai Liang already has the Scorpion mantel (which makes as much sense as making Bruce Wayne the new Superman and pretending it's not a big deal, but that's another conversation), but's there's no longer a cryo to the pyro.

Well, Hanzo pulls the good ol' UNO revserse card and becomes Sub-Zero in Bi-Han's absence. I think this is the safest option for NRS, and turning Hanzo back into Scorpion would probably require for the former Scorpion to either A, discard his power and become a cryomancer (which would make the change ultimately pointless and would wreck his gameplay) or B, kill Kuai Liang off. Fans seem conflicted over him being the new Scorpion, so killing him to "fix" this is a bad idea.

Besides, Kuai Liang and Hanzo Hasashi have great chemistry as enemies AND allies. Their conflicts are meaningful and intense, and they're unstoppable when they join forces. But as usual, I digress.

In Smoke's ending, Hanzo looked like a young teenager and was MUCH smaller than Smoke. I can't imagine middle schooler going up against the roster, mostly because of his stature. But that's purely from an animation standpoint. Ferr/Tor worked, so maybe they could find a way for a kid to realistically hold his own against some like Shao or Havik.

Tldr: I wish I could use this material and brain power for a college essay.

[sl33py-g4m3r]

back down the anti nuclear rabbit hole again just due to all the disasters that have happened~~ the videos are like a train wreck that I just can't look away from and keep watching....

do i like to scare myself for fun or something? cause it makes my anti nuclear stance more firm....

figured I'd share some this time~~ if ya all want to watch what I've found~~

Abandoned Secrets of Chernobyl: 5 Mysterious Artifacts That Were Left Behind

Goiania Incident

SL-1

Castle Bravo

What If You Put Your Head In a Particle Accelerator?

What If You Put Your Hand In a Particle Accelerator?

Therac-25

Cobalt-60: Totally Silent, Totally Deadly.

Kysthym: The Nuclear Disaster That No One Talks About...

Chalk River - The First Nuclear Reactor Accident In History

The Soviet Union's Deadly Abandoned Nuclear Generators

The 5 Secret Nuclear Accidents Stranger Than Chernobyl

I could keep going~~ there's so much out there~~~

I'm anti nuclear weapon, and watching these and various others on what happened at Chernobyl, Fukushimi Dai Ichi, what was left behind, and how dangerous it ACTUALLY IS; strongly heightens my view on the "we shouldn't be doing this, we shouldn't be messing with this at all"

the risk if injury, illness, death, not just of one person, but of entire countries if war were to ever break out with thermonuclear weapons, not including how dangerous power plants are if something happened....

damage to civilians, the environment, the genetic code of everything...

I know I'm biased against it, but is that bias and outright fear of nuclear things justified? or is is safer than these say it is? or is it truly something we shouldn't mess with at all ever? even though by this point it might be far too late?

Cause I think Kyle Hill in this video tells how safe it supposedly is. and says in another video that it's safer than the mercury that's used to make solar power panels, or the upkeep of wind turbines when they get old...

my worry about nuclear power, and nuclear war makes me not buy it as bad as that is... down the anti nuclear rabbit hole a couple of times and I'm now scared (perhaps justifiably or not idk) of both nuclear weapons and nuclear power as a result.

I hate the rabbit holes cause it's interesting and I want to keep researching and learning more, but at the same time to me at least, deeply terrifying and scary....

so is the fear I hold for this justifiable and we shouldn't use nuclear power or weapons or anything? or is it horribly misguided? had I just been fear mongered due to all the disasters that have happened previously? or is it that nuclear weapons shouldn't exist in my view?

I need to stop thinking so much lol and I get down rabbit holes that are really hard to escape....

my view now is still "it's not safe no matter what" if that wasn't obvious enough.....

[necros-writing-stuff]

Mother, might I have some uncle Darius getting custody of his teenaged nibling and grooming them to be his lil wife so that once their 18 they can gave his baby?

This got long lol. Major themes of abuse under, along with slight somno, a lot of non-con and AFAB reader (since breeding).

It had been one huge misunderstanding that had led you to his home. Your father had been vindictive and controlling, your mother sick and as much as a victim as you and your siblings. The videos in court of her freaking out had led to the judge putting her on the same level as him. He was sent to jail for assaulting someone in a bar not soon after, she was put in a hospital.

Your grandparents took the rest of your siblings, but for some reason Uncle Darius took you. They never gave a good reason, just that you were his favourite and that he'd always wanted a kid of his own, but his wife left and he's not good enough with people to find a new one. So now you're his kid.

The first few years are fine. Good, actually. He's stern and a little paranoid about your internet habits, but he doesn't yell and gives you enough freedom so long as you willingly show him that you haven't talked to any strangers. He doesn't know enough about how Tumblr works to find out you've been looking at porn their - or even ao3.

Overall, he's a good 'dad'. You do well in school now that you're not constantly stressed at home. You eat regularly - even if you're mostly cooking yourself. He's away at work a lot. He lets you try some beer, but only on special occasions. He takes you camping in the spring, before the insects get active.

But then you turn 18. His distant yet caring behaviour takes a funny turn. He around more, taking time off of work. Darius' excuse is that you'll start thinking about moving into a University dorm soon, so he best enjoy your time together while you're at home. His lingering touches tell you something different.

None of the touches are enough to call out. Never sexual, just more intimate than what would seem normal between family. You excuse it by saying that he just isn't good with people. And you've seen the train wreck of him trying to ask a lady for her number when you went shopping with him that one time. He scared the hell out of her while you giggled at him from across the store. Darius' face is just like that.

The innocence behind his actions disappears suddenly one night. He's drunk - and he's drunk a lot, so that isn't surprising - but he's never violent. Just tired and quiet. You're stood cooking his supper while he stumbles into the kitchen. No response to your greeting, he never does.

His hand grabs you by the back of the neck, pulling you to his body and making you drop the spoon you're using to stir the pot. This is normal, too. Darius can't just ask for a hug like a normal person, he has to scare the wits out of you.

"Hey darling," he drawls, a hand petting your hair as he wraps the other around your waist. It's nice. Comforting. "Smells good," he continues. He means the food, right? Yeah. He means the food. Even if he's pressing his nose against your neck and inhaling deeply.

"A letter came for you today."

You weren't aware. He always checks the mail. Says he likes doing it, just another weird part of your uncle. You hum and let him continue.

"It’s... it was your University choice, kid. I'm sorry. They declined your admission."

You hands stop stirring. You drop the spoon again, turning to look up at him with tears in your eyes. His large, warm hand keeps petting you, knowing how sad you must feel.

Darius picks you up, turning of the stove and saying that he'll just order in tonight. Don't you worry about that food; he's going to clean and do everything you usually do while he works. You deserve a night to rest after that news.

Cuddling on the couch with old re-runs of Columbo on helps to cheer you up. So does the pizza. Not enough to stop your heart ripping again as soon as your mind returns to being rejected.

"You can stay here as long as you need, kid. I make plenty enough money to support us both. Don't feel guilty about a little set-back. I made a promise to take care of you, and I meant it."

Now you're sobbing like a little baby, gratitude overwhelming you. He's such a good man. Even with his rough edges, you can't even begin to imagine why his wife left.

You fall asleep in his embrace. It's the safest place in the world to you. Nothing can hurt you so long as your uncle - no, your dad - is there to keep you safe.

Shuffling and rough touches wake you up. You're not on Darius' chest now, you're in a bed with the soft sheets under your body. It smells like him. You almost drift off again, content with the thought that he's brought you to his bed so he can keep an eye on you for the night. Something entering your untouched cunt wakes you up immediately.

Your body shoots up, fear filling your previously peaceful mind. With sleep clouding your eyes, it takes a second to see the truth. To see that your dear dad is between your legs, fingering you with lube all over his fingers as his eyes stare into yours.

"Da-"

"No," he says, voice threatening. You shut up with little fight. Your real dad had used that voice a lot. Only when he was angry. "No begging, little one. You're going to let this happen. You owe me this."

You want to fight. You want to kick, punch and scream. To get him off of you and run out the front door to his nice neighbour with the sweet dog so you can get their help. It's like your body is trained to shut down when people abuse you. It's what you did before, back then. It was only being hit then. You wish he was hitting you now.

Your body shakes in fear as Darius keeps fingering, your body tense but responding how he likes. His dark hair falls over his face as he looks down between your legs, his stare obscured enough that you feel grateful to not be under it's scrutiny. Not your face, that is. He's enamoured with the wet sounds your pussy makes as he picks up the speed of his fingers. There's two of them in there now, and it makes you feel funny. It makes you feel good.

"You like this, little one?" he presses, looking in your teary eyes again.

It's safer to nod. To lie and pretend that you're comfortable with this. You were just surprised when you woke up, that's it. Please, don't get mad.

Darius draws away, taking his thick fingers with him. The pit in your stomach drops, knowing that it's far from over. His cock is out - you're both naked. It's going inside of you soon.

"I take care of you, don't I?" he asks as he climbs on top of your body. "I keep you healthy, warm, safe. You don't need to leave. You just need to stay and let me take care of you more. You know you'd be the perfect wife, right?"

There's no leaving this situation. He has all of your money, all of your resources. Your siblings are all still children and your grandparents couldn't stand losing another child. You're alone. You're alone in the lion's den. He's going to devour you. He's been preparing you this entire time.

At least you don't have to look at him as he takes your virginity. He lets you press your face into his neck as he slides in, hissing at how tight and warm you feel. If your fingers raking down his back bothers him, he doesn't tell you. He seems to like it, actually.

"That's it, good girl," he praises, rolling his hips and rubbing your clit against his skin. It tickles, he doesn't shave. God, you feel full. He's so thick and deep inside of you that you think he might be making your tummy bulge. It didn't hurt like you thought it would. Just a little sting, then it felt nice.

The rolling of his hips stops, Darius content that he's let you adjust. His strong arms keep him from crushing you beneath his weight, his muscled body heavy. Then he steals your breath from you by beginning a slow, harsh pounding. He isn't being quick, not right now. Just strong. Just showing off how easily he could hurt you if you don't behave.

But you’re going to behave. Because that’s what you learned, right? That it’s quicker and easier if you give in and give them what they want. So now you’re digging your teeth into your bottom lip and trying to let your mind wander. It refuses to leave your body, every slap of uncle Darius’ hips against the back of your thighs bringing you straight back to the present. 

At least it feels good. At least it’s not hurting you. You thinks that’s good? But maybe it should hurt so that you don’t have to deal with the guilt of the pleasure. It’s too late now. You’re trapped between the comfort of his embrace and the love you feel, versus the betrayal. Things will never be normal now. You can never see him as your protector again. But he is your protector! He’s-

Your mind swims, almost making you nauseous from how confusing it was all getting. But focusing on the present make it stop. Taking in Darius’ scent, listening to his groans and feeling his strong arms under your palms grounding you and stopping your thoughts from spiralling. If you just pretend that he’s someone else, you can do this. That’s what you need to do.

But you can’t. There’s no one who’s made you feel so loved and safe. There’s no one that replaces him in your mind. There’s no one you love more. You’re sobbing now. Sobbing and grabbing him closer. You still want his hands petting your hair and telling you that everything will be okay. You still want him to kiss your forehead and let you know that he’s here for you. You need him.

The slow pace he’d been keeping is enough for you. You’re pushed over the edge, whimpering and shuddering beneath his muscled body. 

“That’s right, milk my cock,” he grumbles, picking up the pace and making you gasp at how sensitive your pussy feels. Your squirming hips don’t stop him, if anything they help him reach his own end as he fills you up. “You’d be such a perfect mother.”

That’s when he finally gives you the forehead kiss you’ve been needing. When he rolls over and pulls you into him again, refusing to take his length out of your warm, soft body. You choose to ignore the mother comment. You don’t want to break the serene state of mind that has settled over you. You don’t want to leave the bubble your mind has made to keep you safe.

“I know this was a shock, but you’ll see. You’ll see,” he whispers as he strokes your hair. “You love me still, right?”

Swallowing deeply, you nod, sniffling and letting your tears dry up. “I still love you.”

Darius smiles, closing his eyes and sighing in relief. “Get some sleep, kiddo. We can go shopping in the morning. You deserve some nice dresses to wear.”