#life is kicking my ass friends!! it really is!!
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HELLO MS/MR/PERSON!!! I have came to you with a request 😈
Ok imagine Wally west (ma boy need all the love he can get💔) dating reader, right and so they get a condo (basically a fancy apartment). And so he and young justice are fighting a villain, the justices league are in space doing wtv.
And young justices are basically getting their ass kicked (sorry for my language)
So they need a place to hide, for a little while. It yk stack back up on weapons and stuff, medical attention. right and so Wally is just like
>My condo is just down the road, we can hide out there<
RIGHT and you’re probably wondering where reader is right now um she’s at work (she’s a personal assistant of a CEO 😶 cough Wayne cough)
right so she’s staying at work late working out some extra things, and she gets home early than expected. Unlocks the front door. just to see like 5-7 hero’s in her living room.
dick: who are you?..
y/n :I’m the owner of this house who are the you??🤨
Thank you if you do thissss!! 💗💗💗
"We need to retreat and regroup."
Wally heard Aqualad say in his mind. You have to love Miss Martian's telepathy link.
"I have a condo a few streets away."
Wally thought before he could really notice he told them. You took first aid courses in university when you were trying to decide what to do with your life.
It's a very useful skill to have, and it became infinitely more useful when you gained a superhero boyfriend. Why does he let his villains hit him? You'll never know. It might be for the ego of the villains.
He just hoped you didn't pull out the pepper spray when you come home to a bunch of superheroes using the first aid stash. You were quick to pull out the pepper spray and grab anything nearby that could be used as a weapon.
Wally, admittedly, did not think you'd be coming home so early from work. You told him you're staying behind to finish some last-minute projects that came up. Unfortunately for him, you were sent home by Bruce Wayne after he noticed you were almost complete with the work for the rest of the week. He told you to go home and relax.
You did not expect to come home to several superheroes in your condo and a sheepish Wally awkwardly avoiding eye contact. Poor Tim got hit in the head with a lamp due to your fight-or-flight response. A warning would have been appreciated.
"Who are you?"
Connor asked rather rudely. All of the heroes got into a fighting stance except Wally. You told him with raised eyebrows,
"I'm the person who owns this condo. Walls, what the hell is going on?"
Wally gave a sheepish smile and explained to them further,
"Guys, this is my partner."
You frowned at the heroes. They all looked injured, some worse than others. You sighed as you headed to the medkit you keep in your bathroom. You knew the drill.
While you were gone, outrage and chaos emerged.
"When did you get a partner?"
Tim borderline demanded to know. One of his best friends never told him about this secret lover. The betrayal. Wally nervously smiled and said,
"Three years ago."
He was actually going to propose on the holidays, but he decided against tell them the wonderful news. He had no idea how long he would have kept you a secret. Until you were happily married and they started to hound him about the sudden wedding ring on his finger? He had no plans to tell them about you.
You were his paradise. You had kissed every injury, past and present, while telling him he's doing a great job as a hero. He was always a tad self-conscious about his hero life. He felt he could do more, but he was always a tad too slow. He needed to catch up.
Everyone shut up when you came back with your arms full of all the medical equipment you had stockpiled.
You started to patch everybody up without saying a word. You were still slightly mad at Wally from bringing in his hero friends without warning, but you can't stay mad as Aqualad hissed and cringed as you stitched a wound on his thigh.
You murmured apologises as you moved between the heroes while patching them up.
"How did you two meet?"
You frowned at the amazed tone Tim had. Tim genuinely thought his friend would never get into a relationship due to his constantly running mouth.
"He ran into me when I was travelling in a different country. Quite literally."
Wally rubbed the back of his neck with a timid smile. He didn't like admitting it. He was in a fight with Godspeed, and he didn't have time to dodge you.
"It was love at first accidental tackle."
You chuckled. He was lucky he didn't kill you with his superspeed tackle, or you would've haunted him for eternity.
"He asked me out pretty much on sight without realising I would see his civilian self, not his hero self."
You smiled and shook your head in amusement. The team could believe it. Wally's mouth runs faster than his brain.
You stood up from your spot of the floor and said,
"It would be for the best if you avoided fighting for a few days. You can let the big guys handle it."
Aqualad agreed, and the team thanked you for the medical supplies. Tim told you to bill him for the medical supplies.
"Either way, I'm replacing the medical supplies."
You frowned but agreed to let him pay at his insistence. You cuddled into Wally's side with a smile and a quick kiss.
"One of these days, I'm going to tackle you as retribution."
He laughed,
"You have been saying that for three years, babe."
And just like that, you tackled him to the ground and peppered his face with kisses. You love this man dearly.
Your soon-to-be fiancée had laughed under your love attack and wrapped you in his arms as if you were a precious gem.
A/N If you want, I can do a part two about the engagement/proposal. I agree that a lot of DC characters need more love.
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The Year I Turned 25 • JK + AT (4/10)
SYNOPSIS: Grammy-winning R&B artist Y/N Y/LN, 25, is closing out the North American leg of her tour, riding high on the success of her sophomore album "The Year I Turned 24" - a raw, emotional project born from her public breakup with an NFL player. As she prepares for six weeks in Europe before the international leg of her tour, she's determined to have her own "hot girl summer," yet she’s unaware that she's about to get entangled with not one but two professional footballers - Jules Koundé and Aurélien Tchouaméni - sparking new public interest in her love life and forcing her to confront her fears about dating athletes again.
PAIRINGS: Jules Koundé x Y/N Y/LN (fc: Ayra Starr) x Aurélien Tchouaméni
WARNINGS: cursing, football b.s., not so glamorous life of a celebrity, mentions of mental illness/misogyny/slut shaming/cheating, drug use (marijuana), drinking, rotational dating, eventual smut, paragon partners/polyamory — 18+ only
TAGLIST: @irishmanwhore, @sucredreamer, @whoevenisthiz, @saturnville, @peyiswriting, @greedyjudge2, @pepfectionary, @cocobutterqwueen, @alika-4466, @julescpu, @lettersofgold, @hopefulromantic1, @a-moment-captured, @serpenttines-library, @f1-football-fiend, @purplelewlew, @elyseesarchive, @enretrogue, @2serenity0, @yeea-nah, @127hydrangeas, @sunfairyy, @pinkcatcus, @muglermami, @shelovesfootie, @bbgkoo, @greyishbach @sinflowersugar @cranberryjulce
CHAPTER 4: X Marks The Spot...
YN was curled up in her hotel bed, scrolling through her phone with a smile playing on her lips as she sent a 'congrats' text to Lewis for winning his race in Silverstone before replying to Javaughn.
Professor Fine 👨🏾🏫: Made it to my conference. Already bored. Rather be back on that plane talking to you
YN: Aww poor baby. Give a lecture about Keynes to wake yourself up
Professor Fine 👨🏾🏫: A sense of humor AND knowledge of economic theory? Dangerous combination
Shit the only thing I even remembered from ECON 101…
He's cute, her thoughts mused, but not French-boys cute.
Her phone buzzed again:
Jules 🇫🇷: Can I stop by? Miss your face x
YN: Yeah sure
She barely put her phone down when there was a knock. Opening the door revealed Jules with shopping bags, looking good enough to eat in shorts and a fitted tee.
"How did you know I would say yes?"
Jules set the bags on her hotel room's small dining table. "I figured you missed me as much as I missed you."
"Aw, you're so cute." She peered into the bags. "What's in there?"
"Board games and food. Wanted to make the best out of being confined to each other's rooms."
She pulled out Monopoly, UNO, and Operation, grabbing the UNO deck with a grin. "Are you good at UNO?"
"Hell yeah."
"Well I'm the best so prepare to get your ass handed to you." She climbed onto the bed, patting the space next to her.
Jules kicked off his Sambas and settled beside her while she shuffled, their shoulders brushing.
Between rounds of "Draw Four" cards and playful trash talk, Jules asked, "Do you miss home?"
"Yeah, especially my mama's cooking. No offense but German food ain't hitting like her fried chicken and mac and cheese." She detailed Sunday suppers - collard greens, cornbread, sweet potato pie.
"She cooks like this every Sunday?"
"Pssh," YN trilled her lips. "Every day. She lives with me."
"Really?"
"Yeah, we've got this house in the Valley. Made it our own - got a garden with herbs and vegetables, renovated the garage into a gym. We do yoga together in the mornings. She's my best friend."
Jules' smile was soft. "That's sweet. You're really close."
"What about you and your mom?"
His eyes grew distant, fingers fidgeting with his cards. "I was an asshole growing up," he admitted, a shadow crossing his features. "But we got closer, especially since... well, I don't really know my dad." His jaw tightened slightly. "His brother reached out when I was sixteen. Met my half-siblings, but only saw my dad once or twice. He's all over the place. Most of my family - grandmother, cousins - they're in Benin."
"I feel you on the dad thing," YN said. "My sperm donor bounced when I was three. Just walked out on mama and me one day. No explanation, no nothing." She laid down a red seven. "Sometimes I wonder if he sees me on TV or hears my music and thinks 'damn, that's my kid.' But fuck him though. Mama did just fine on her own."
Jules' expression softened with understanding. "Fuck him," he agreed quietly. "My mom did everything too. Made sure I knew my heritage, my roots in Benin. Never really struggled with the racial identity stuff like some biracial people do."
"You're mixed?" YN feigned shock. He shot her a look before his mouth quirked into a grin, realizing she was joking. "I googled you after the photo op."
"Oh really? So you knew all of this?"
"Nah," she laid down another card, now only holding two. "Just skimmed Wikipedia. Did stalk your IG though. Feel like you can really get a vibe of someone from their social media."
"Huh," he played his hand. "And what does my IG say about me?"
"That you're a fashion girlie who takes himself way too seriously in photo shoots." His laugh filled the room just as she slapped down her card. "UNO!"
Jules looked discombobulated. "How did you–"
She batted her eyelashes adorably. "Told you to prepare to have your ass handed to you."
He muttered a curse, played his card, and watched her win. "You're cheating or something?"
"Sore loser much?" She clutched invisible pearls. "You should see me play Spades - mama made sure to teach me how to run that game."
"What is Spades?"
Her jaw dropped in shock. "What? How do you not know Spades? Have you not been to any cookouts–"
His wide, toothy grin gave him away.
"Your face!" he pointed, laughing uncontrollably.
YN squinted mock-angrily. "You almost had me, Jules Olivier."
That sobered him slightly. "Ooh middle name? Let me guess, you read that on Wikipedia?"
"Among other things. Like how they say you're 5'11" but you're more like 5'10"."
"5'10" and a half," he corrected.
"Oh wow," she deadpanned.
"Yeah, that half-inch makes a difference," he grinned, adding a wink.
YN smiled at him, letting out a soft sigh. "Nothing like trauma bonding over daddy issues".
"My therapist would call this a breakthrough moment," Jules quipped back perfectly.
A freak AND gets dark humor? her thoughts swooned. The perfect man doesn't exi–
They then moved to the table for ramen, Jules telling her about his post-Euros plans.
"Going to Japan for two weeks. Need to decompress after the tournament."
"That sounds dope."
His eyes sparkled mischievously. "You should slide through."
"To Japan?" She nearly choked on her noodles. "Nigga what?"
"It's still your Hot Girl Summer," he shrugged. "Why not?"
"You want me to stay the whole two weeks?"
"If you can. But a week is fine. I know Auré probably wants to spend time with you after the Euros too."
"Yeah, I'll think about it."
"Alright, chérie."
This man really just invited you to Japan! her intrusive thoughts screamed.
A whole international vacation, her rational side considered. That's... serious.
But watching Jules slurp his ramen, looking soft and domestic in her hotel room, she couldn't find it in herself to panic about what it meant.
All YN wanted was to rot in bed, wrapped in the hotel's fluffy duvet while binging every rom-com Netflix had to offer. She was three UberEats orders deep - having demolished a burger, then Thai food, and now picking at some döner kebab as Brown Sugar played in the background. Damari's interview on "Real Bros Talk" podcast had dropped late last night, and social media hadn't shut up since.
Her group chat with Jazmine and Dominique was blowing up with reactions, and Jermaine had already called four times about possibly releasing a statement. Even her label wanted to know if she was going to channel this into another album.
As if he deserves any more of my creative energy, she thought bitterly, shoving another fry in her mouth.
TheShadeRoom: #DamariRush opens up about his relationship with Grammy winner (you know who 👀), says he "wasn't sexually satisfied" and needed someone to "match his freak" 🤔 [Video clip attached]
view all comments...
ynglobaldom: Not him trying to shame her for being inexperienced when he got caught cheating??? ↳ popculture_tea: The projection is REAL ↳ teamdamari: Maybe if she wasn't so boring… chartdata: Her album about him went #1 though 🤷🏾♀️ IDC IDC minaroe: Sir you averaged 3 yards per carry AND 3 pumps max ↳ tsrfans: SCREAMING 💀 deuxmoi: Meanwhile she's living her best life in Europe…
Three-pump chump at best, her intrusive thoughts scoffed. All that gym time for what?
Exactly, her rational side agreed. What's the point of working out if you can't even use that stamina?
Her phone buzzed non-stop:
Mama 💕 Baby girl call me
Big Kyle I'm booking a flight to Cleveland rn. Just say the word
LewLew Bean Ignore that 🤡 You're thriving without him
Jules 🇫🇷 Thinking of you x. Let me know if you need anything
Aurélien 🌹 He's not worth your energy, belle. But I'll beat his ass if you want
Professor Fine 👨🏾🏫 How are you doing? I would love to have dinner with you soon...
Enzo 🇮🇹 Bella, don't let him dim your light. You're magnificent x
Carina 💋 These men are trash. Come back to Florence, I'll treat you right 😘
She ignored them all, which wasn't fair to her French boys especially, but she needed peace. This summer had been transformative - teaching her about being open, exploratory, less stuck in her head (because a girl really gets in her head). She'd discovered parts of herself she never knew existed, found strength in vulnerability.
Her therapist's words echoed: "Give yourself grace. You're allowed to feel hurt, but don't let it stop your growth."
So she deleted the Instagram app, cutting off the negativity. She'd found something real in Europe - perhaps not with Jules and Aurélien, but definitely with herself.
After another hour of self-loathing and mindless Netflix, YN dragged herself up. The French national team was already on their way to Munich to prepare for their semis against Spain, and she had a six-hour private coach ride ahead of her.
Get it together, she told herself, cleaning up the UberEats carnage and shoving clothes into her suitcase.
She chose comfort for the journey - matching grey sweatsuit and slides, hair wrapped, not a stitch of makeup. The coach was basically a fancy van, but she wasn't trying to impress anyone today. Just R&R and her thoughts.
Somewhere around hour four, her phone buzzed:
🌹🇫🇷 Group Chat:
Jules 🇫🇷 Made it to Munich x. Miss your face
Aurélien 🌹 Can we see you tonight?
YN Not really in the mood boys
Jules 🇫🇷 We'll cheer you up! Got something fun planned
Aurélien 🌹 Not what you're thinking 😈
YN scoffed out loud.
Jules 🇫🇷 Be ready by 9! Wear something comfortable
She typed out another "no" but deleted it. Maybe distraction was exactly what she needed.
YN Fine. But no funny business
Aurélien 🌹 Us? Never 😏
These boys, she thought, but found herself smiling for the first time all day.
______________________________________________
YN stepped out of the Uber, pulling at her biker shorts as she stared up at the JUMP House Munich sign in confusion. She glanced between Jules and Aurélien, who both looked way too pleased with themselves.
Jules chuckled. "You told us you liked bouncy castles."
"And we even had the employees sign NDAs," Aurélien added casually.
Her eyes bugged out. What the hell? "You rented it out?" YN asked incredulously, tugging her oversized t-shirt back into place.
"Yeah, surprisingly it didn't cost that much," Aurélien shrugged, looking fine as ever even in athletic wear.
They rented it out AND made sure it wouldn't leak to social media? her rational thoughts swooned.
The bar is in HEAVEN, her intrusive thoughts agreed.
"We wanted to hang out with you and figured this would be a nice place outside of our rooms," Jules explained.
Inside was a playground of interconnected trampolines, foam pits, and obstacle courses. They headed straight for the massive free-jumping area, armed with foam balls for an every-man-for-themselves dodgeball battle.
"This is so unfair!" YN shrieked, bouncing and falling as foam balls flew at her from both directions. "Y'all are literal athletes!"
"All's fair in love and dodgeball," Jules called out, launching another attack.
"What he said," Aurélien agreed, showing absolutely no mercy.
The soccer trampoline section brought out their competitive sides. Both men started showing off, doing elaborate mid-air tricks before their kicks.
"Real humble, guys," YN rolled her eyes.
"Your turn," Jules challenged.
To everyone's surprise - including her own - YN managed to score several goals.
"Yo!" Jules' eyes widened. "Coach needs to sign her up!"
"For real," Aurélien nodded appreciatively. "Got that natural talent."
"Les Bleus could use you," Jules added. "I know people—"
"Boy, stop," YN laughed. "Singing is my gift to the world. Besides, y'all just impressed 'cause your standards are low."
"Our standards?" Aurélien raised an eyebrow. "You just scored on a goalkeeper."
"A robotic goalkeeper on a trampoline," she corrected. "Don't get excited."
But watching them bounce around like overgrown kids, demonstrating increasingly ridiculous tricks, she felt the weight of Damari's interview lifting. Sometimes healing looked like getting pelted with foam balls by two French footballers who'd rented out a trampoline park just to make her smile.
And what a smile it is, both her thoughts agreed.
"I need a break!" YN called out, bouncing off the trampoline. Her thighs were burning, but it was worth it.
The workers huddled in the corner, speaking rapid German and sneaking glances their way. She caught phrases like "Koundé" and "Nationalmannschaft." Normally it would stress her out, but those NDAs were ironclad.
Jules and Aurélien followed her to the café area, looking unfairly fresh while she was dripping sweat in very unsexy ways.
Now THIS is how you use stamina, her intrusive thoughts purred, eyeing how neither man seemed winded.
She chugged half her water bottle before speaking. "Y'all are machines or something?"
"Professional athletes, remember?" Jules grinned.
"Belle," Aurélien's eyes lit up as he spotted something across the room. "Want to try the battle box? Like American Gladiators."
YN looked at the elevated platform with foam sticks. "You want me to get up there and fight y'all? Two whole professional athletes?"
"We'll go easy–"
"Absolutely not. My ego can only take so many hits in one night."
"Your loss," he shrugged, already getting up to grab one of the foam battling sticks. "Jules?"
"Oh, you're going down," Jules jumped up, grabbing one for himself.
YN settled onto a bench, phone ready to record this foolishness. The boys squared off on the platform, circling each other like they were in an actual arena.
"Your defense is trash!" Aurélien taunted, taking a swipe that Jules barely dodged.
"Better than your aim!" Jules shot back, feinting left before striking right.
They traded French insults she couldn't understand, but their laughter echoed through the space. Watching them play-fight, seeing this unguarded side of them, YN felt a pang in her chest. Three weeks and four days left of her summer vacation. She'd miss this - miss them. The way Jules' eyes crinkled when he really laughed. How Aurélien's smirk softened when he thought no one was looking.
Maybe they'll let you spin the block when the mood hits, her intrusive thoughts suggested.
"Ha!" Aurélien knocked Jules off balance. "That's what happens when you talk too much shit!"
"Oh, fuck you! Rematch!" Jules demanded, already climbing back up.
For once, both her rational and intrusive thoughts agreed: these French boys were worth keeping around. Even after summer ended, even after she went back to reality.
"YN!" Jules called out. "Come referee!"
"No way! Y'all are too competitive–"
"Please?" They both turned those eyes on her.
Definitely worth keeping, she thought, getting up to play referee despite her better judgment.
_______________________________________________
YN found herself in Aurélien's hotel suite. She couldn't believe what was happening - another date night (hangout?) with her two French baguettes, but this felt different than all the others.
The night started off normal - JUMP house, coming back and ordering room service, chatting the shit, laughing, watching movies.
However, as usual, whenever they were together, things got heated and she now was standing in her bra and panties in front of them.
"You're thinking too hard again," Jules noticed, his hand caressing her shoulder.
"Just processing," she admitted. "Two weeks ago I was overthinking every little thing. Now it feels..."
"Natural," Aurélien finished, his smile softer than usual.
Girl, you know exactly where this is heading, her intrusive thoughts purred.
And for once, we're not overthinking it, her rational side agreed.
They'd never made her feel pressured or insecure. If anything, she'd never felt more desired, more understood. The connection between them flowed like lava - intense but not consuming. The way they looked at her - like she was precious but powerful - made her feel invincible. Made her feel brave enough to want more.
Something that Damari never did...
"We take care of what's ours," Jules said simply.
And that's what she was, wasn't she? Theirs. At least for now, at least for this perfect summer moment.
Her knees hit the carpet as their eyes darkened with promise. They kissed and fooled around already but YN's nerves were now electric, her body humming with anticipation. She watched as Jules slowly removed his shirt, his muscular chest on display, while Aurélien pulled his t-shirt over his head, revealing a glimpse of his toned torso.
"Relax, ma belle," Aurélien whispered, his voice like velvet. "We have all night."
YN took a deep breath, her hands trembling slightly as she reached for Jules's belt first. His warm fingers covered hers, stilling her movements.
"Easy, cherie," he murmured. "Take your time."
She inhaled, the scent of his cologne filling her senses, and exhaled slowly, steeling herself. With a nod, she tried again, her fingers deftly unbuckling his belt and sliding it free from the loops. The rasp of the zipper followed, and she gently tugged his shorts down, revealing his black boxer briefs.
Jules's erection strained against the fabric, and YN's mouth went dry. She reached out, her fingers brushing against the bulge, feeling the heat radiating from him. With a gentle pull, she freed him from his underwear, his thick shaft springing free. She inhaled his musky scent, her body responding with a rush of heat.
Leaning forward, she took the tip of his dick into her mouth, her tongue swirling around the head. Jules's hands found her hair, his grip firm but gentle as he guided her, encouraging her to take more. She relaxed her jaw, taking him deeper, her lips sliding down his length.
"Fuck, yes," Jules groaned, his hips thrusting forward in rhythm with her bobbing head. "That's it, baby, take it all."
YN's eyes fluttered closed, her jaw aching slightly as she accommodated his size. She reveled in the sounds of his pleasure, his praises fueling her desire. Then, she heard Aurélien’s voice, a soft murmur in French.
YN's free hand reached out, pulling Aurélien closer by the waistband of his sweat shorts. He chuckled, his warm breath tickling her ear as he whispered, "Impatient, aren't you?"
With Aurélien’s help, she untied his shorts, sliding them down his lean hips. He stepped out of them, his boxer briefs already tented with his erection.
Aurélien guided her hand to his dick, his shaft hot and rigid in her grasp. He groaned, his head falling back as she stroked him through the thin fabric, her touch tentative yet eager. "Come 'ere, pretty girl. I want to feel that mouth of yours."
YN released Jules with a wet pop, a string of saliva connecting her lips to his glistening dickhead. She turned her attention to Aurélien, her hand pulling his boxer briefs down before wrapping around his length as she leaned forward, taking him into her mouth.
Aurélien’s hands cupped her face, his thumbs brushing her cheeks as he guided her. "Slowly, ma belle. Breathe through your nose."
She obeyed, her breath coming in shallow pants as she took him deeper, her throat working around his girth. Aurélien’s praise filled her ears, his hands tightening in her hair as he began to thrust gently, his hips moving in a slow, sensual rhythm.
"That's it. Suck me." His voice was hoarse, his accent thick with desire. "Merde, YN."
YN moaned around his length, the vibrations sending him over the edge. He withdrew, his dick glistening with her saliva, then he plunged back into her mouth, his hips snapping forward as he began to fuck her face. YN's hands gripped his thighs, her nails digging into his skin as she took him, her throat working to accommodate his thickness.
Aurélien's thrusts became more urgent, his hands tightening in her hair as he held her in place. "You're so fucking good, bébé. I'm gonna cum."
YN's eyes widened, her body tensing in anticipation. She wanted this, wanted to feel him release, to taste him. Her throat relaxed, and she focused on the sensation, on the pleasure she was giving, her own desire spiking with each of his grunts.
With a final, powerful thrust, Aurélien came, his dick jerking in her mouth as he spilled his seed. YN swallowed, her throat working to take all of him, her eyes never leaving his.
Aurélien withdrew, his breathing ragged, his hands roaming over her neck. "You're incredible, YN."
YN's cheeks flushed, her body buzzing with satisfaction. She turned her gaze to Jules, his erection still hard and ready. "And you?" she asked, her voice husky. "Are you ready for more?"
Jules's eyes darkened. "Fuck yeah. Come 'ere." He positioned himself between YN's legs, his eyes locked onto her as she eagerly drew closer. Her tongue darted out, expertly navigating his length. She sucked and teased, her hands gripping his hips as he groaned in pleasure.
Meanwhile, Aurélien moved behind YN, his fingers deftly unhooking her bra. His hands explored her breasts, kneading and pinching her sensitive nipples, causing her to moan, her mouth full of Jules' dick.
Jules's climax was sudden and intense. He groaned, his body convulsing as he released his seed deep into YN's throat. She swallowed quickly, savoring the taste of him as well.
They then led YN to the bed, where she lay back, her eyes heavy with lust. Jules and Aurélien positioned themselves on either side of her, their lips finding her neck and breasts. Jules’s tongue skirted across YN’s neck, sending shivers down her spine. His touch was gentle, almost reverent. Aurélien, meanwhile, was a different story. His hands were rough, his movements urgent.
Aurélien’s attention soon turned lower, his tongue tracing the curve of her hips and the soft skin of her belly. He reached for her panties, tugging them down to reveal her core.
"I've been waiting to taste you," he murmured, his eyes dark with desire. His tongue delved deep, exploring every inch of her, while his fingers danced over her clitoris.
"Fuck," YN moaned, her voice a mere whisper. Her body throbbed with pleasure, her back arching and her nails digging into the sheets as she cried out. Jules continued to kiss and suck on her neck and then her body shook uncontrollably as her orgasm hit her like a freight train. Aurélien lapped up the sweet nectar happily, his tongue darting in and out of her hole.
He pulled away once he was done, a satisfied smile on his face as he sat on his haunches. "You wanna try the Eiffel Tower?" Aurélien asked, a mischievous glint in his eye. YN hesitated, her cheeks flushing.
"It’s your call, YN," Jules assured her, his voice gentle.
"You won't mind if Aurélien and I..." she trailed. A flutter of nerves danced in her stomach. The idea of taking them both at once was daunting but one at time seemed more plausible. Less scary.
Jules gave a reassuring smile. "Nope," he replied, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "I’ve got a thing for watching anyway."
YN rolled her eyes playfully. "Of course you do. Such a freak."
Jules shrugged, a smirk playing on his lips. "If you say so." With that, he moved to the far end of the bed, propping himself up on one elbow, a spectator ready for the main event.
YN was nervous, but also excited. She turned to face Aurelien, who was already leaning in, his grip on YN’s hips tightening. A shiver ran down her spine as he captured her nipple with his tongue, swirling it sensually. YN's back arched into a bow, a moan escaping her lips.
"Showtime, ma belle," he said, a cocky grin spreading across his face. He then turned, reaching for his shorts that were still on the floor. He retrieved a condom from his pocket, tearing open the package with his teeth and sheathing himself. The raw, primal gesture sent a wave of desire crashing over her.
Aurelien positioned himself at her entrance, slowly thrusting inch by inch until he was fully seated within her. YN glanced over at Jules, who was watching the scene with a half-lidded gaze. A pleased smile played on his lips.
"She takes dick so well," Jules remarked to Aurélien, his voice low and appreciative. Aurélien groaned in agreement. "You got the man speechless, chérie. Good pussy will do that."
YN moaned, her attention torn between the pleasure from Aurélien and the thrill of being watched by Jules.
As the pace quickened, Jules began to stroke himself, his eyes fixed on the passionate scene before him. Aurélien’s thrusts grew harder, deeper, driving YN to the brink of ecstasy.
"Fuck, baby!" YN whimpered, wrapping her legs tighter around Aurélien’s waist as his pace became erratic. "Fuck…fuck…"
"He’s fucking you good, huh?" came Jules’ soft voice. "Are you gonna cum, chérie?"
"She’s so tight," grunted Aurélien as he gripped her waist tighter, the sound of his balls slapping rhythmically against her reverberating across the room. "Fuck you’re so wet, bébé."
"Oooh…I’m gonna cum. Shit, Auré, just like that."
Since when was she ever this vocal during sex? But then again, sex had never felt this good, this exquisite, to have her teetering off an edge. YN’s head thrashed back and forth on the sheets as Aurélien’s stamina proved to be withstanding and unrelenting, his hips moving in an almost Sonic-like speed.
From his spot on the bed, Jules continued to stroke himself with fervor, his eyes never leaving YN and Aurélien until he too felt those familiar coils within his body.
With a final, explosive thrust, YN’s body trembled as she climaxed. Aurélien’s wasn’t that far behind, with him emptying his pleasure inside the condom and spent but satisfied, collapsed onto her, his weight supported by his elbows.
Both Aurélien and YN were breathing heavily as they heard Jules utter a curse before exhaling a long sigh, signaling his own release. They lay like that for a moment – the murmurs of post-coital bliss echoing the space, their hearts beating like jackhammers within their chests.
"Well," YN started, breaking the silence. "That was fun."
"Incroyable," declared Aurélien just before he planted a tender kiss to her forehead then rolled off of her to dispose the condom.
"Ditto," concurred Jules, and YN felt the bed shift as he got off as well. "Let me clean you up, chérie."
YN simply nodded and remained still, her body continuing to spasm from the aftershocks of her orgasm.
Not us having back to back orgasms! Love that for us! her intrusive thoughts cheered.
A dopey-ass grin etched on her tired face, and footsteps drew closer until she felt a warm towel gently cleaning her inner thighs.
"Are you good, YN?" wondered Aurélien’s deep voice from a couple feet away. "She looks out of it, Jules."
"Nah, she just been fucked really good, is all," Jules said with a low chuckle as he finished cleaning her up. "She’s gonna sleep like a baby tonight."
I really am.
"Come on, ma belle. Let’s tuck you in." This was Aurélien and YN hummed in contentment as she felt his strong arms delicately lift her body and situate her flushed against his on the bed. Another kiss on her forehead then one on her cheek. "Bonne nuit."
Bonne nuit indeed…
The last thing she heard before drifting off to sleep was Jules’ little giggle and then them whispering something to one another in French.
YN's muscles protested every movement - her thighs especially were giving "day after leg day" energy, though the workout had been much more enjoyable. She stepped into what had to be the biggest shower she'd ever seen, and that was saying something considering she'd had a custom rainfall shower built in her Valley house. But Aurélien's suite was ridiculous, all marble and multiple shower heads and enough space for three people to move comfortably.
Jules' playlist filled the steamy air, his voice joining Brent Faiyaz: "You know you're all mine, all mine..."
"Stick to football, my guy," Aurélien chuckled, washing his hair.
"Like you can do better?"
YN leaned against the marble wall, adjusting the shower cap on her head and the silk scarf beneath, which Aurélien mysteriously had in his luggage (she wasn't going to ask questions, just appreciated that her sew-in was protected). The hot water soothed her aching body.
Last night had been... well.
Her thoughts didn't need to finish that sentence.
Worth the soreness, her intrusive thoughts decided.
Definitely worth it, her rational side agreed.
The domesticity of it all should've scared her - three people sharing a shower like it was the most natural thing in the world. Instead, it felt right. Easy.
"Pass the body wash," she called out.
"Ask nicely," Aurélien teased.
"Please pass the body wash before I slip and die in your fancy ass shower?"
Their laughter echoed off the tiles as Jules handed her the bottle.
What amazed her most was how nonchalant they were - not just about sharing a shower, but about last night too. She still couldn't wrap her head around how close they were, how far removed from the toxic masculinity she'd grown accustomed to with Damari.
Her ex would never. He was always spouting some homophobic nonsense, getting weird about showing any affection to his boys. "What I look like hugging some nigga? That's gay as fuck!" he'd say, like basic human touch would somehow compromise his manhood.
Yet here were Jules and Aurélien, having a full-blown conversation about their upcoming match while naked, sharing space like it was nothing. Zero awkwardness, zero fragile masculinity, just pure comfort with themselves and each other.
A mindfuck, her intrusive thoughts noted.
But the best kind, her rational side agreed.
Maybe this was what real security looked like - being so confident in yourself that you didn't need to police every interaction for "sus" behavior.
"What are you thinking about?" Jules asked, noticing her expression.
"Just… appreciating the view," she deflected with a grin.
But really, she was appreciating how much her definition of masculinity had shifted since meeting them.
The playlist shifted to Travis Scott's "R.I.P. Screw" and Jules started dancing, making YN shoot him a weird look. She turned to Aurélien like is he for real?
Aurélien just laughed. "You should see him in the locker room. He screams out Kendrick Lamar songs like a nutcase."
"And like you don't do the same whenever you listen to Meek Mill?" Jules called out while rinsing off.
Aurélien kissed his teeth. "Whatever, bro." He gently nudged YN forward to rinse. "Anyways, Jules said you're going to Japan with him?"
YN shook her head, squinting conspiratorially at Jules' back as he exited the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist. "I didn't give him an exact answer yet, but I'm thinking about it."
"That's dope," Aurélien said.
"Where are you going, Auré?" she wondered, letting the water wash away the soap.
"Maybe LA with some friends first then Sicily. Why? You wanna come too?"
YN's smile widened. "I can hang with you in Sicily. My first stop is in Rome, so that's perfect."
"Oh that's cool. Maybe I can see your concert before I head off to LA."
"I like that," she said, stepping out as Jules wrapped her in a fluffy towel.
Minutes later, she stood at the counter brushing her teeth next to Jules with Aurelien in the other side, the domesticity of it all making her heart do weird things.
_______________________________________________
Sandwiched between her French boys in Aurélien's massive bed, YN munched on a fruit salad while they watched Challengers. They'd spent the whole day in his suite, the boys returning from practice to find her exactly where they'd left her.
When they got to that scene - Tashi kissing both Patrick and Art - YN's foot-in-mouth disease struck.
"Did you guys just wake up one morning and decide to share that girl in Bordeaux or did you have one of those bro talks?"
Jules burst out laughing while Aurélien shook his head, rolling his eyes. "It was both."
"Both?"
Jules' laughter subsided. "We were young and horny and like I said, Aurélien is my bro, so…"
"That easy?"
"I mean, yeah. And it's every guy's fantasy to have a threesome," Aurélien shrugged.
"Well yeah, but with another guy? I thought it was more so two girls?"
"Yeah, I guess. But there's been conversations in the locker room about running a train on girls and whether people were down—" Jules started.
"Running a train? What?" she screeched. "You guys were like twenty talking about — you know what? Just continue."
Jules scoffed. "It happens a lot honestly. Auré and I aren't into all that. Not with everyone on the team. But he was down and the girl was down… and it was nice."
"So what happened to her?" YN popped a grape in her mouth.
The boys shared a glance before Aurélien answered. "Feelings. We caught feelings and so did she, but for both of us. And we didn't really understand that we could both date her at the same time. Like polyamory wasn't as mainstream as it is now."
"Plus we needed our prefrontal cortex to be fully developed before making choices like that," Jules added.
"And now?" YN pressed, chewing another grape.
They exchanged another look, smirking. "I thought this wasn't a serious thing?" Aurélien quipped.
Touché, she thought.
"Well, I'm just spitting hypotheticals… so hypothetically speaking, if I didn't want to end this and wanted two boyfriends…"
"It'll be hard because you're in the States, but we both live in Spain and spend a lot of time together anyway. It's really nothing but a flight," Jules said.
"What about one-on-one time or is everything just going to be together?"
"We can do both. Jules and I aren't really the jealous types, especially if you're ours."
"And sometimes I just like to watch," Jules winked.
"Your freaky ass," YN sighed, amused and just a pinch irritated.
"You say that like it's a bad thing," Jules chuckled.
"It's not–" Her phone buzzed.
Professor Fine 👨🏾🏫 In Munich soon. Dinner tomorrow? Would love to see you before heading back to NY
She quickly turned her screen off.
"You don't have to hide who you're talking to, belle," Aurélien said.
Jules gave her a reassuring smile. "Yeah, it's cool."
"I know, but still…"
"Text your other man, YN," Aurélien urged, eyes back on the TV.
After a pause, she replied:
YN Tomorrow after the match? There's this great Italian place near my hotel
Professor Fine 👨🏾🏫 Perfect. Looking forward to it 😊
She put her phone on DND and tucked it under her pillow.
"You're so awkward," Jules said.
"Very," Aurélien agreed.
"It's still rude!"
"Are you gonna fuck him?" Jules asked bluntly. She shot him an accusing look. "I'm just looking out for my sexual health, okay?" He held up his hands. "I know about Auré because we did our physicals before Euros and everything's clean with both of us, but adding another partner after Enzo and Carina and now us?"
"I'll take another round of tests just like I did after Carina and Enzo. Safety is my priority too," she said. "But I don't know. He's hot yet I'm not gonna just jump in bed with him. Dinner first."
"Okay," Jules nodded.
"Alright," Aurélien agreed.
"Plus I'm fine with you two," she added with a mischievous grin.
They shot her amused looks as the movie played on.
Who would've thought, her thoughts mused, that summer would turn out like this?
Tomorrow was the semi-final, but right now, curled between them, YN felt like she'd already won.
TO BE CONTINUED...
#emjayewrites#aurelien tchouameni#jules kounde#jules kounde x black reader#jules kounde x you#aurelien tchouameni fanfic#aurelien tchouameni x you#jules x yn x aurelien#footballer fanfic#footballer x black reader#footballer x reader#fc barcelona fanfic#real madrid fanfic
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no social experience has felt quite like being a 20-something year old managing people significantly older than you
#had a 60+ year old volunteer mock me today rather than just say she didn’t hear/understand me#this job is gonna look so good on a resume but holy fuck is it draining me of every ounce of sanity#i don’t want a big girl job anymore i’m going back to my bookstore job#this past week has been so god damn exhausting#why am i as a summer student carrying some of the centre’s biggest burdens ???#why did i have to singlehandedly meet a deadline that other ppl had MONTHS to work on but i made it happen in two days??#literally drafted & designed their most important annual document ?? in two days ?? hello??#i also just have so many fucking jobs like i’m always switching hats#went from doing all that this week to managing an event today#in the last 14 days i’ve worked 12 of them and i am just… so so beyond over it#i am physically and mentally exhausted pls send help#looking forward to a long weekend this coming weekend though :))#life is kicking my ass friends!! it really is!!#talk time
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time for another kh doodle dump
#that gummi boss kicked my fucking ass.#imagine how pissed i was when i grinded for gummi shit for like 20 minutes only to find out it wasnt required#never felt closer to sora in my life when i wanted to crash the ship and end the franchise early#kingdom hearts#kh#sora#riku#soriku#roxas#isa#saix#vanitas#the sora n vani i drew for my friend but you can tag it as ship if you really want#trans riku#i need the tboy riku truth to be heard RISE RISE RISE#my art
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no fucking wayyy dude
#so you kick us out of a sever for saying people shouldnt joke about child rape/assault#and say u have evidence me n a friend were talking behind ur back#so you unfriend us n kick us out of yhe group#instead of oh idk talking about it with us like a mature person#you constantlyyyyy say ur trying sooo hard to get better at communicating but thats suchh bullshit u js want people to feel bad for you#oh sorry i think joking about raping a child is disturbing and gross#sorry me n my friend were talking about that together#not spreading “rumors” or even talking to other ppl about it#js airing problems out to eachother#literally go fuck urself youre such an entitled asshole#you use your mental illnesses to make people feel bad for you and get mad when they dont#sorry im not pitying a cis white girl who lives pretty comfortably financially in a safer part of town.#i cant even tell if she realizes how attention seeking she really is#the excuse of saying we were talking shit in a channel or whatever is literally suck bullshit#if i said something about the child rape jokes in a channel and you know its about you Obviously you should take a fucking look at yourself#Also not to mention when we got in a fight you said shit to my Face in “your channel” that made me go into one of the most dissociative#paranoid episodes in my life Ever. making me question my fucking morals and shit#how fucking up your own ass are you#whatever talk to me like a fucking grown up if you think youre so mature asshole#<- sorry this isnt about anyone here but im so fucking mad its like#genuinely disgusting#venting
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I don't not mean this offensively at all but is blows my mind that you are a lawyer but also writing jjk fics bc I work at a law firm and cannot for the life of me imagine any of the lawyers that work there writing fanfiction LOL kudos to u seriously I know how busy schedues can get due to court dates haha
im working in like. big city criminal law stuff right now and have been told by people in my office that i come off as a very deadpan and straight-laced legal nerd so i don't think the people who know me from my attorney life are imagining me writing jjk fanfic in my free time either
#I've got a friend who's clerking for a federal judge rn who's also a big fandom person tho she doesn't write#the legal sphere in general really does try to consume your entire life and i sort of hate that part of the business#like i like being a lawyer but i don't like how aggressively it tries to occupy your whole life#it makes offices very cultish#i like having boundaries in life and i have plenty of friends in my office but like. i have a life outside of it too that i want to keep.#and lawyers are so up their own ass about professional reputation that fandom shit is almost never discussed in a legal environment#you could not waterboard it out of me that I write fanfic for fun at work oh my god#it's not that i'm ashamed of it to be clear i'm proud of my stories i just don't know any of them well enough to trust them yet#lawyers are assholes so often holy shit#like not all of us. some of the nicest people i have ever met are lawyers. but the culture breeds a lot of very big and fragile egos#probably more lawyers than you'd think are into fandom stuff but they absolutely do not bring that shit up#i'd like to think i'll be doing fanfic and fandom stuff for years. it's just a great community and i really really love doing it.#i'm also a kick ass lawyer tho so i'm probably gonna be doing some pretty serious shit at work and just also being a fanfic writer.#but yeah court is exhausting and chaotic and i've been in it every day for like two weeks now so feel free to shoot me
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11:23
I'm a damn leech. That's all I am
#audrey/kellie's rambles#audrey/kellie vents#dont mind me#im a leech. im a bug. disgusting. im too much to bare. others in the community talk to each other and yet rarely me#i try to talk witj them. maybe im just not that ... good with my ocs. maybe thats why they never ask. maybe-#im too fucking clingy. im too obsessive. im too moody. im fucking crazy.....#I'll just be here tho. i wonder why no one really talks to me. outside of the internet and in of the internet too#but maybe that means im too fucking annoying for something. bjt then again they have a life and its not sll about me. and my long ass asks#they should be sble to live their life. and yet here i am. getting jealous fucking jealous that my friends are talking to each other#its stupid. i shouldn't be like this. its fucking stupid to he jealous of my friends talking to each other. but it seems like i only#see them as my friends or maybe its because i said smth about my school. and then they leave me alone. but theyve.. always left me alone#always. always a shadow. always actually reminding me that im a bad fucking person. always to be there because...#honestly it has to be me. right? im the damn problem. thay dont talk to me. yet i talk to them endlessly. like they are already gone or smth#i suck at being friends. because this is who i am. some possessive fucking freak. i really should. choked myself with some wires.......#this is just reminding me that my twin is more better and more interesting then who i wanted to be hack then when i was on Amino.#even back then they didn't care for me. now its like its the same but much worse. because-#i hate it. i hate feeling lonely. what the fuck. give me fucking validation. give me attention. give me love.#give me any fucking kind of attention. hate on me. spit on me. kick my legs. i dont. i just want attention. i want to be the center of it#all. but im not and it fucking kills me. i want it so bad. and honestly? i did. for a fraction. because of Flor and my other past ideas#and Flor was a bit of a self insert. she was a sona. in a way. and now Yume will be one too. but-#fucking. don't fucking talk to me. i need to work on his draft
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Welcome Everybody to my page of Mr.Aaron Taylor. The man, the muse. I’m so excited to start this blog and meet mutual other fans of Aaron 🤭☺️
#aaron taylor johnson#kick ass#bullet train#british celebrities#love of my life#handsome#thats my husband#imjustlettingeveryoneknow#imfirstinline#just kidding#not really#welcome to my blog#stay#make friends
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feeling like you’re 12 when you’re 22 is genuinely such a humiliating experience.
#my dad and mom have been on my case ab asking for permission before I go places and it makes me kinda sick#seeing everyone around me make plans or whatever and then being like ‘I’ll have to ask 🥺 👉🏽👈🏽#’#and my dad’s a liar he’s like it’s not like we ever say no#except my mother does and so does he???#even the muslim girls I am friends with have more freedom and you know what’s amazing ab this is#they can’t stop me from going to school. they don’t pay for that#they can’t take my car. they don’t pay for that#my mom can stop making food for me and I will manage just fine#they wanna kick me out???? blessing in disguise#but it’s hilarious that as an adult i’m still paying for everything I use but I still have to ask permission genuinely fuck off#my parents when I have to stay late on campus for some school event: 😒#the way I’d be making money rn if they didn’t decide to come and stalk me at work and see me without my hijaab on#and that one’s on me I could choose to just work with it on and make them happy#but I literally can’t as a matter of principle#i’m given such little pride as it is and if I say I don’t want to work with a hijaab on that’s that#i got an internship two days ago for the summer and you can bet your ass I’m not wearing my hijaab#except it’s not paid#and as much as I have guilt spending I really don’t spend a lot and it makes me so angry#i know that your 20s isn’t your whole life and people shouldn’t think that if they waste their 20s their life is up#but it’s like#my teens were already so shitty and abusive and trapped#how much longer do I have to deal w this before i’m treated like an adult#trick question! it’s only until a man can own me bc then he can make my decisions instead of them <3
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Today’s my birthday and this week when Steven was having a hard time beating a level of a video game he passed the controller to me and I beat it instantly and that was the very first time I have actually assisted in a hard part of a video game rather than being the one who needs assistance… so I guess I have grown!
#I did SO much socializing this week#been missing my family though!#playing video games of any sort makes me think of my brother and cousin…. I wish they both were still like a big part of my life#steven’s brother is like. kicking ass trying to fill in and be my brother which is really sweet and awesome but#sorta feeling like… i don’t really have… like. any sort of Inner Circle of friends in my life right now#hmmm#my post
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F- favorite song?
M- middle name?
S- song last listened to
Y- your last hug?
F - Favorite song (at this very moment)
M - Dona 🫶
S -
Y - my friends 🤗
#hi sweetheart!#I hope you read my last ask cause it goes for you too#I’m sorry I’ve been distant and quiet#(to all my lovely mutuals and friends that I talk to)#I know I say it a lot#but life really has been kicking my ass lately#taking one day at a time that’s all that matters right#but now I have to apply for jobs and who knows how that’ll be on my mental health#anyway mini rant over sorry haha#I just hope you guys know I appreciate you more than words could ever express#you guys are some light in this dark world#thank you so much for existing and being my friend 🫶#favorite song was a tough one man#so I just did the one that popped into my head right away#it’s just I relate to this song so fucking much#pretty sure I have a draft with this song and ranting about how much I love it and relate to it#anyone who knows me irl KNOWS I’m going to be late#yes I do feel bad and guilty about it#but this song lays out exactly why I’m starting to not care#at least I’m showing up ya know?#idk I know it’s awful#I just really lost all concept of time#time is my enemy and I hate the bitch#Livingston is one of my favorite artists and this is one of my favorite songs by him#it is a collab but I love how deep the lyrics get#also fucking love Hercules and fairytale so much#the lyrics from those songs are written on my heart ya know#thank you for the questions lovely#ask#lovely mutuals
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.
#i feel like venting and not a lot of people follow me here so i figured this is the best place to do it#i'm just so tired all the damn time#depression has been kicking my ass#and i've been trying for so long to get a handle on it#and nothing seems to work#going to possibly be starting a new med in a few weeks but idk#i just want to feel normal but i feel like i'll never get to that point#and then there's the fact that i don't really have any friends#the only person i do stuff with is my mom which is kinda sad#but idk how to meet people#ugh i'm just so done with everything#like work has also sucked recently#i had to leave after like half an hour on wednesday and took the rest of the week off#and my boss has been super understanding which is great but again i just want to feel normal and be able to do my work#i feel like such a failure in every aspect of my life#i'm 25 and what have i accomplished?#i know everyone goes at their own pace but god i feel like i'll never catch up#okay i think i'm done now#i doubt anyone read this but if you did uhhhh thank you and i hope you're doing well xo#jace talks#delete later?
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.
#I’m so ready for this chapter to be done with#and I had a lot of hope that I could manage an update this weekend but I found out today that x is coming to visit#and listen. I’m at 20k so statistically it’s gonna get done sooner rather than later#but sooner might not be until next weekend and that frustrates me since I had an ideal update schedule I want to maintain#and I don’t want it to get messed up ma#*up#and it doubly sucks that the reason im so behind is that the holiday season kicked my ass on top of all the prep I had to#*to do for my friends wedding and I just. idk I don’t regret doing any of gang since it’s core memories but I kinda just reminds me that if#i want to live the life I want to live then writing will have to go on the back burner at times but I always want to be writing#like in high school my parents rented every episode of sharp’s rifle off of Netflix so that they could show it to me and my sibling#*sibling except I didn’t watch any of it since I was holed up in my room writing all the time like they all have this core memory of#watching this show together that I don’t have but if I didn’t hole up like that then I wouldn’t have practiced writing as a teen which#i needed to do since I wasn’t born a good writer and had to really learn if#*it cause I have no natural talents lmao yayyyy ok it’s 1am I’ll go to bed now#will delete probably
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I officially completely unplugged myself as much as I can 🙃🙃🙃 I’m way too reliant on my phone and waiting for people to talk to me is super unhealthy and has made me very anxious. I literally turned off ever single possible notification and will purposefully not be responding to messages because I just need time a space to figure out how to navigate myself without validation from others.
#plz no sexyleon#life update basically#I’ll still be using tumblr and stuff and I’ll probably reply to things on here#but I likely wont be responding to direct messages#I just???? I’m too clingy and needy and I feel reliant on the people I talk to for any sort of social interaction to be happy#I gotta figure it out because my mental health is in the shit and I can’t be reliant on others for stability#and I didn’t even really notice that’s what was happening until all my friends were busy on the same day and I really just needed someone#anywyas sorry this is complicated I just needed to vent in the void#also for my mutuals who I talk to all the time this is why I’m afk and I’m sorry I love you very much I just have to figure it out#why am I insane and hoping people try to reach out to me anyways??? just to say they are here if I need anything?? like I do to them????#idk this is why I gotta stop#im the loneliest bitch in the world but I really can’t be anymore I gotta be alone in this bitch but not lonely#or I need to make friends with my loneliness and we can tackle the world together#otherwise im not going to survive#my anxiety is out of the roof and I constantly feel like I’m having heart palpitations#I literally think I’m going to die sometimes#I used to say I’d prefer the anxiety over the depression because I know how to navigate anxiety#well guess what my anxiety evolved like some sort of mega Pokémon and now it’s kicking my ass and I don’t have any idea how to defeat it#sorry for venting
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|WHUMPRIL 2023|
|Day 25 ~ Heart Racing|
(@whumpril)
⚠TW⚠
- Mention of Guns
- Swearing
- Mention of Murder
- Mention of Rape
----------------
The air was suffocating, and it didn't help having an officer with a gun directly behind me.
My old social worker sat next to me, and I could feel her eyes staring at me even when my gaze never left the floor.
Another officer paced in front of me, seemingly deep in thought.
Finally she cleared her throat and spoke.
"Alright Ka-"
"That's not my name." I growled.
Silence filled the room once again. My social worker sighed. I slumped further in my chair.
"Okay, we got off on the wrong foot, let's start over. I'm Officer Claire.. and you are.?"
"..May.." I mumble.
"Okay May, I was the one in charge of your case the day you disappeared. Can you tell me what happened?" Claire asks.
I stay silent.
Claire sighs and walks over to me, placing a hand on my shoulder. I flinch away at the contact.
"I think we need to speak alone. Could you both leave for a few minutes?" Claire asks the other two.
I assume they agree because in a second they are both out the door.
Claire pulls up a chair in front of me. "Now.. I need you to tell me what happened."
I wrap my arms around myself. "I can't.." I whisper.
Claire frowns "Why not?"
"I can barely remember.." I reply.
"Well, I'll read my reports and see if we can trigger your memory." She says.
"Let's see here.. The day was May 16.. your birthday, correct?"
I shrug.
"You were in your 6th placement, and your foster father was Richard Norman."
The name is familiar, and it leaves a sour taste in my mouth.
"We got a call that night, around 9 pm.. the neighbors heard screaming. When we arrived, Richard was dead. There was a stab wound from a broken beer bottle right where his heart was.."
My nails dig into my skin.
"Upon further inspection.. We found more blood on the bed in the master bedroom, as well as in the bathtub of the master bathroom.. Testing revealed that it was your blood."
I dig my nails further, drawing blood.
"Did he hurt you, May?"
I can't respond.
"May.. Did you kill him because he.. raped you-"
Claire barely manages to get that sentence out before I break.
"SHUT UP-!" I scream.
"May, calm do-"
"DON'T FUCKING TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!" I yell as the door suddenly opens.
The cop has his hand next to his gun, as if he's preparing to fire. My social worker looks scared.
Claire immediately puts her hands up. "Don't worry Carson, everything's fine-"
At this point I'm having a full meltdown, and I'm nowhere near okay as Claire says. I sink down to the floor, hands gripping my hair.
Claire stands up. "We'll.. just give her a minute to calm down.. She just needs alone time."
And with that, I'm locked in a room by myself.
Without thinking, I start banging my head against the wall. It's painful, but also comforting.
My eyes scan the room, and I spot a window.
I quickly stand up and drag a chair over to the window. I stand on it and try to open the window.
Locked, as I suspected.
I throw myself against the window, trying to break it.
I look down at my hands, then back up at the window, and I suck in a breath and punch the window with all my strength.
Pain erupt in my knuckles as they collide with the glass, but the window breaks.
I jump up and begin to pull myself through the window, glass digging into my skin.
The second I pull myself through, I hear the door unlock.
I force myself to stand and I start to sprint. I run as fast as I can, not heading towards any specific place.
After what felt like forever, I stop to catch my breath. My hands scramble for my phone, and I dial the only number I can remember off the top of my head.
'ring'
'ring'
'ring'
"May?"
I gasp in relief that Kai actually answered.
"Kai- I.. fuck-" I trip over my words.
"May, what's wrong? June said you disappeared-"
"I need- help-" I struggle to catch my breath.
I hear the jingle of keys on the other side. "Where are you?"
"I don't- know.." I say as I feel tears fall down my face.
"Look around, do you see any signs?" Kai asks.
My eyes dart around until I spot a sign. "Garden.." I manage to say.
"Eve's Garden? That's where you work May, remember?" Kai says.
"Uh huh.."
"Okay, I'm coming now. Can you wait somewhere?"
"No.. They find- me.."
"Who? Who'll find you May?"
"Bad.."
I hear voices behind me, and I gasp and run into the nearest alley to hide.
"Hey, what's going on?" Kai asks, but at this point I'm a crying mess that I can't physically answer.
My chest is tightening and I feel like my lungs are closing in. I gasp and try to breathe but I can't.
Black spots blur my vision along with tears.
"May, talk to me. Focus on my voice." I hear Kai say.
I slump against some old boxes, phone against my ear.
"Please.." I barely manage to say.
"May, I'm 2 minutes away, just stay on the line.
I grip at my shirt and that's when I realize how much I'm bleeding. Small cuts litter my arms and knees.
"..'M bleeding.." I mumble.
"May I'm here, where are you?"
"Don't know.. tired.."
"No, don't you fall asleep. Tell me what you see."
"Red wall.. boxes.."
"Are you in an alley?"
"Mhm.."
"Okay, hang tight."
I hear footsteps approaching, and my heart almost beats out of my chest.
I hear a 'fuck' and there's arms around me. I cry and try to fight back, but my muscles give up.
"Hey! It's me May! What's wrong?!"
I shrink away from his touch that feels like needles.
"Fuck.. you're bleeding.."
Those same needle hands pick me up despite my protests.
I open my eyes slightly and that's when I see the night sky. Somehow, I feel calmer just by staring at it.
The calmness slips away as I'm put into a car, away from the stars. I whine as I hit my fist against my head.
"You're okay.." A voice whispers.
I feel my shoulders jerk up and I grunt uncontrollably.
I feel something heavy placed on me, and my body calms a bit.
"Hold on, we're going home."
I grunt softly in response.
A phone rings, and I cover my ears at the sound of it.
I keep my eyes closed as Kai responds to the call.
"Hello? Woah- hey it's fine. I got her."
...
"Yes.. she's okay, for now anyways."
...
"She's injured, you should call that one lady- yeah her."
...
"Pretty bad. Cuts all over her arms and legs.. and a pretty large gash on her arm."
...
...
"She's resting right now, she had a meltdown I think.. Yeah, one of those."
"I don't know if she is.. that's a question for another day though."
...
"Okay, I'll see you soon, bye."
I feel a hand rest in mine, and I give a small squeeze in response.
"It's okay.. rest. You'll be okay."
#whump#whumpril#whump writing#day 25 done!!!#procrastination is kicking my ass rn#i have to post 5 times tomorrow.#i hate my life#also i really hope i managed to write an autistic meltdown correctly#i got some help from a friend who is autistic as well as another friend who has 2 autistic siblings but idk if its realistic#anyways ima be on a grind tomorrow so watch out for that#enjoy <3
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that last art comic reblog FHDHDDJSDJJDJKSKSFHSBRRRRRRR BRAIN IS GOING SO BBRRRRRRRRRRRRRTT ROGHT NOW I want to talk about it so bad and about why it's making brain go BRRRRRRRTHDHFHDDJJDJSS BUT I know no one cares and no one will want to listen. i shared it with people and no one will respond. especially not the people it reminded me of who aren't as obsessed with a past thing as I am since I can't just let go and move on from hyperfixations/special interests so easily. even if it ended bad. I got no closure and still LONG FOR IT SO MUCH IT MAKES ME SO SAD THAT ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO GET BACK AND AHHHGH
#no one understands. at all. ive tried explaining. everyone who were there with me moved on and dont get why i cant#or their bad experiences completely ruined and tainted the memories amd they rather forget and mever talk about it#but i cannot. im too autisticly attached despite the bad things that happened#and that comic really scratched some of the itch#i need to resist begging the artist to make more like that just to satisfy me#or i need life to quick kicking my ass so i can make my own 😭😭😭😭😭😭#theres just something about dumb autism siblings committing goofy chaos crimes against normal domestic life “rules” that ugh chef kiss#(i headcanon all fontaine siblings as autistic like me and my friends do its perfect)#and i just ugh. i always want so bad to autistic monolog about my rp goofs and stuff related and now this comic#which is connecting a current special interest to the last one that was ripped from my hands before i even realized it#and hffhfhjdvdjfbdjskdhhkssk too many feelings and things to say and no one to say them to 😭#i wish i could make someone watch my old rp goofy moments video and some other old videos with me but no one cares or wants to :((#lee text#that was a lot but i have feelings and needed to yell into the void ugh
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