#let people want neither of them back
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Bonding Over Burns
You know, like you do when your part of the Endeavour Family.
You remember when the relevant Todoroki was Shoto? Good times, good times.
I've talked on and off about Endeavour, and how soft the story has gone of him, and to a lesser extent Dabi, and how things should be harder on him as well, if for different reasons, but I just want to talk... broadly a bit. This is going to get a bit rambly, and mostly focus on the clusterfuck of the latest chapter.
Hmm. Let's start here: I actually like Dabi. He's insane, and I wouldn't want to be in the same room with him in real life, but he's a fun character who can drive great plot. In all honesty, I want him to win, even now, and I'm not even guilty about it, because unlike Shigaraki, his goal is literally just, 'Fuck Endeavour', and that's something society could survive, and honestly should.
So, with the background of me being a long-time Dabi fan, I say this: this is shit. There's been so much Todoroki content recently, so much of it focused around Dabi, and yet this is what we get.
A lot of the discontent is around the Quirk Awakening, and while I have problems with the ice part of it, which I will get to in a sec, but the Awakening itself isn't a problem. Rather, with how the story is arranged now I don't see a problem with it, but in the first place I think he should have gotten it way back when when he lit himself on fire.
In any normal circumstance, there's no way Dabi should be alive. As the story is, that's being explained as AFO's interference... but that goes into the problem of AFO being everywhere, and everything, that Hori has been thrusting at us since Kamino. Making AFO the cause of every damn problem in the story is a problem in itself. So, how would he be alive now?
*jazz hands* Quirk Awakening.
Not ice, but something tailored to his situation, something that to solve the problem of, 'how in the ever loving fuck are you alive?', because even before he started cosplaying Skeletor Dabi was living with a level of burns that would have serious day to day life consequences, if he even managed to survive getting them. To be blunt, Frankenstein's Monster, which is made out of corpses, is better put together than Dabi's body is. If Dabi's Quirk is too strong for a human body, then give him something to let him survive it; advanced regeneration, the ability to just shrug off burns, being fueled by his fire, something.
You see, Quirk Awakening themselves are... acceptable, as a concept. They're something that makes sense in a manga like this, as a power up, and especially as the 'lore' of it has developed and it's become clear that Quirks themselves can change over time, even if the logic and science of the setting has become softer and softer as time passed. The fact that, as people have put it, Dabi awakening because of how Endeavour treated him 'proving him right' is kind of missing the point, because, well, he always was.
In the coldest, brutalist, most devoid of mercy or empathy kind of way, Endeavour has always been right about this. Quirk marriages are objectively horrible, but they're also the path to stronger Quirks. Like, hell, look at Bakugou. By the logic of the setting, Bakugou might as well be from a Quirk Marriage for how well it was set up for him, because he is the exact sort of multiplicative product Endeavour desired, but he happened by sheer dumb luck instead of primitive, inefficient, and cruel eugenics. We damn well know that his parents wouldn't have kept going for another child if his Quirk was just really slimy skin or something.
Dabi getting a Quirk Awakening doesn't prove shit about Endeavour's methods because Shoto already exists, the very product he desired. Hell, Dabi already unlocked super blue flames by pushing himself to limit, because again, while the mental, social, and ethical consequences of pushing someone to their limits and beyond are very valid, in a manga like this going beyond your limits is exactly how you get a power up, something we've seen time and time again in the story; Endeavour isn't making anything new, he's just tainting an already known phenomena with his abuse. It's not worth the price, but the result itself can happen under this kind of logic.
But, do you know what the first thing I thought was when Dabi started shooting ice?
How convenient it is, that it happens just in time to save Endeavour. Because that's what the ice is ultimately for: to protect Endeavour from the consequences of his actions because, without that, at the very least his arm would probably be gone by now. The ice literally appeared just in time to protect Endeavour from any career ending injuries. Dabi would die without being able to be redeemed. Endeavour himself would be dead, which is seeming more and more unlikely to happen at this point.
Making Rei 'important'? This HImura clan stuff? Please, don't insult me; it is dead obvious that all of that is nothing more than yet another last minute justification to push what narrative Hori wants to tell against the actual story he's made.
How is anyone alive now, when Dabi is literally a giant bomb radiating lethal amounts of heat? Rei is randomly strong enough to counter that, an actual suicide attack with smidgen more of Dabi's ice being used against him to help everyone else at his expense.
Actually, let's talk about Rei: can we replace her without a cardboard cutout with the catchphrase of, 'Endeavour isn't that bad!' yet? Because this isn't a character with agency. This isn't even a proper character. She has never been, on screen, shown with any real agency as a human being. Actually, let me put it like this: do you know when she was shown with the most respect as a human being, as a person with her own will and desires?
When she was burning Shoto. That is how badly her inclusion in this manga is; Rei's best showing is her having a psychotic break.
Sweet burning fuck that is pathetic.
Let's be blunt here: does Rei have any culpability? Technically, yes. Realistically? Honestly? Fuck no. Rei is a broken woman who was sold to Endeavour. He spent his entire marriage growing more aggressive, more dominating, to the point where the only time she did something of her own free will, without the approval of Endeavour, is have a psychotic break. He was the one with power in the relationship, who made the choices, who made the Todorokis into this. And, just to be clear? He did, in fact, hit her.
The lion share of blame for Dabi is with Endeavour, followed by Dabi himself. Rei's share is fucking miniscule. And yet she has to run into the death fire to apologize to the mad, suicidal terrorist for everything.
Meanwhile, why is everyone else here? Why is Natsuo and Fuyumi here? Why are they, the people who were literal children at the time, feeling guilty? Their father had all the power, all the control, wh fuck could they do then? Or even now! They're even weaker than Rei, and Rei needs a pointless, out of nowhere power up just to survive. They should be dead long before the point they could even have this conversation. Actually, could we even have a real talk if they want their 'big brother' back, instead of it just being assumed that of course they want their crazy, murderous relative back, who they were seperated from as different, inferior, in childhood, who didn't know how to interact with them, and who they grew up without their entire lives? Them ultimately settling on wanting him back is fine, in theory, but it shouldn't be this assumed thing, they should be conflicted over this, and have had long talks about, in the same way they should have about Endeavour himself.
Hell, from the other end, why does Dabi care? Why is he going, 'Fuyumi-chan'? They were never more important than him than his ambition to live up to his father's dream, it was all that he lived for. There's every indication he's left all that behind for his hate; let him. Let Dabi be evil, let him be unredeemed!
But that's the thing: it's not about Dabi, and what he should think. It's not about Natsui, or Fuyumi, and what they should think, and we damn well know it's not about Rei, because nothing is ever about her. It's still about Endeavour. All of this, all of this, is still about god damn Endeavour.
Dabi being an actually unforgivable person makes Endeavour look bad. If Dabi dies, gloriously filled with his incandescent hatred, it means that Endeavor can never 'fix' what was done to him, he can never be redeemed from his crime, his apology can never be accepted. This is, of course, exactly the reason why Dabi is trying to do it at all, to rob Endeavour of the peace that could give him, and why Hori won't allow him to do it, to let him succeeding in taking that away from his father.
Everyone being here to claim responsibility for making Dabi who he is? Is taking that much blame away from Endeavour, lightening the guilt he bears. Even if they're logically wrong, when the whole family is there, working together to 'fix' things, it gives the impression that they 'broke' it together, and thus Endeavour's sins are lessened in the eyes of the viewers.
All of this, all of them; Shoto, Dabi, Fuyumi, Natsu and Rei, all of them exist for one thing only at this point: to tell the story of the great and glorious Endeavour. His rise to success, his overcoming of the odds, his wonderful redemption story. Everything they do is to prop up the man who abused every single one of them, and it's sickening.
#bnha critical#mha critical#endeavour critical#what is this crap#even now all of this is about endeavour#even the ice is to protect endeavour#let endeavour be hated#let dabi be evil#let people want neither of them back#let shoto be important#let rei be her own person#let rei BE a person at all
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I actually think Dorian and Orym should fight more.
Remember when their slowly building tension over and entire episode (full of passive aggressive remarks and blame throwing) led to threats? And how after, Orym thanked Dorian for handing over the crown sadly because he knew Dorian would be mad at him? And Dorian couldn't even look at him because he was legitimately hurt, thinking Orym was disappointed in him for doing what he thought was right? That was peak.
The fact they went from that to their current closeness and trust is the best part of their entire dynamic. Their relationship was hard fought and still will be. They will fight for it because they respect and care for one another deeply, and their disagreements don't change that, only improve it.
#critical role#cr3#orym#dorian#dorym#text post#cr discourse#'dorian deserved that actually and is being stupid by agreeing with ludinus'#'orym was too mean and needs to be quiet about his trauma'#just say you don't understand their characters#or that they are characters#you don't have to agree with them. they can make decisions you wouldn't make and disagree with#its good tv regardless#dorian didnt deserve that and orym was too harsh#dorian needed to be reminded of the consequences of indulging those ideas and viewpoints and orym is tired of this discussion happening#these things can coexist#neither of them have the whole picture here. we can't judge them based off of what we as viewers know#dorian didn't see first hand what the ruby vanguard has done. only what the spider queen did so thats on his mind more than anything#orym didnt see first hand (nor hear many details) about opal and cyrus. only what the vanguard has been doing to them for months#let them bicker and argue#its the best part#only going near the discourse because i have been waiting years for more of this and bitches on twitter are complaining about it#and often from people who don't even like orym (or sometimes dorian). go back to ignoring them and let me enjoy this moment in peace#i know i am adding to the discourse but i needed to find other people who want more dorym relationship drama before we get more fluff
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I think that the party's communication issues can be summed up as "man, is it awkward to tell someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with them if you've only know them for a few months? Probably."
#isat#isat spoilers#in stars and time#listen they will kill for each other but also its such a short time???? like??? thats part of the tragedy tbh#like!!! yeah theyll go back to their previous lives bc who in their right minds throw out everything they were doing before for people youv#only known for a few months and it turns out all of them do bc theyre insane for each other but!!!! like!!!! thats still a big ask!!!!!#yeah lets throw out everything we've ever know to be together lets fucking go and then they do in the end!!!! but!!!#thats because theyre all are ride or die to the extreme for each other!!!!!! far more than siffrin thinks anyone will ever be for him!!!!#anyway I have a lot of feelings about the party and just how bonkers (affectionate) they are#yeah no siffrin I too would not expect people to put aside their previous lives especially if its clear they have other plans#'yeah im gonna invite myself over to your house to live here lol' yeah no I would not assume that!!!!!!!#the issue is more that issue doesnt communicate what he really wants because if they do and his family says no then... being together truly#will end so he doesnt ask so they never will get a no so it never has to end (and has his reason to keep going)#this is turning into an essay in the tags but like. God its a wild set of circumstances so#tbh Siffrin not thinking the party wants to travel together is not wild to me neither is family not communicating#them wanting to be together ALL OF THEM wanting it is... unbelivable in these circumstances#but they do bc theyre all insane and ride or die but the extent of which is a mystery to all of them#anyway thats my essay in the tags#just read the no loops fic where the adults minus siffrin all offer to bring bonnie to bambouche and had FEELINGS about it#my posts
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exes bucktommy who are fucking in secret... hooking up in the restroom of their karaoke bar because they still have the same friends and they still hang out at the same places. buck agrees to watch jee and whoops look at that, tommy was just dropping off something with chimney and once chimney and maddie leave he just... stays. and fucks buck in their kitchen. eddie lets himself into buck's loft one day and tommy rolls and drops off the bed and stays there till he's sure eddie's gone. buck gets teased about his new hickeys at the station and feels a pang of guilt when hen says maybe he should cover them because tommy is coming over for lunch and the sight of them might just hurt him
#they cant let go off each other but they also dont wanna talk about why and they also dont want others to know because the reason why#they cant let go off each other is clear as daylight#they say they like the secrecy of it and it's all casual and the other can date people if he wants but neither of them do#at least for a long time#then one day one of tommy finds himself agreeing to a date because this thing with buck is getting too hurtful#and when buck learns about this he is DESTROYED#and he fucks tommy about it ofc but also cries in the aftermath#idk they somehow resolve it#a day after getting back together they learn everyone knew anyway#bobby says something about he heard noises from his closet during a nash-grant barbecue and buck wants the ground to open up a lil bit#bucktommy#911#mimi.txt#911 fic
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We are one Iowa caucus into the absolute shitshow that is going to be the US 2024 elections, and I'm already sick of seeing takes downplaying the risk that Trump and his fascist followers represent.
Look. Around 1900, my mother's grandparents immigrated to the Lower East Side of New York City. They brought with them children born in Europe (Poland? Ukraine? which country they were in depends on what year we're talking about) - we're not 100% sure they were THEIR children, even, but there were three, and they were young, and they came. But my great-grandparents had siblings, parents, cousins, uncles, aunts, huge families. And while my understanding is that an attempt was made to convince those folks to move to the US, none of them ultimately opted to.
They all kept in touch as they were able, exchanging letters and pictures, but through World War 1, through the 20s, through the Great Depression, through the worsening situation in Europe in the 1930s, my entire extended family who chose not to immigrate...continued to stay.
I think we all know how this story ends.
I have an entire family photo album of people whose names I will never know, because after every single one of them died in the Holocaust, my great-grandparents and grandparents couldn't bear to even label them. And they were PEOPLE, poor, vibrant, eager to maintain connections with their loved ones abroad. One was a Klezmer musician, and we have photos of him with all the different instruments he played. They're so real on the page, and they all ended in ashes.
And you know how that started? Fascism started with every inch allowed, with every well-intentioned moderate who tried to maintain a middle position even as the whole ground shifted right beneath their feet and even "middle" became extreme, every "no that change isn't coming fast enough, I want instant full improvement NOW" liberal who felt that doing nothing was better than accepting a slower improvement in the (truly awful!) post-World War 1 living situation in Germany.
Most of the members of my extended family also downplayed the risks. They never imagined that the worst could happen to them. They never fathomed how bad things could become.
And now I have their example always before me to know and to scream:
I KNOW HOW BAD THINGS CAN BECOME. I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FAMILY THEN.
I WILL NOT LET THAT HAPPEN TO MY FAMILY NOW.
People look at me like I'm crazy when I say I've got our passports ready (and have had since before the 2020 election).
Look. I don't know what will happen if Trump is elected, but there's a very real possibility he will, and he's been extremely clear about saying what he'll do. He did a lot of the things he said he'd do last time. I expect he'll continue to do the things he says he'll do. And the things he say he'll do will lead to the deaths of more people than we can imagine - in the US, in Palestine, throughout the world.
Don't tell me there's a middle ground here. Don't tell me I'm over-reacting. Don't tell me the worst won't happen. Don't tell me the risk is mild. Don't tell me we're safe.
We. Are. Not. Safe.
The lives of dozens, hundreds, of members of family were lost in the 1940s amid the horrifying statistic "6,000,000 dead Jews."
I will not let my life (as a Jew), my wife's life (as a disabled woman), my son's life (as a biracial boy), my daughter's life (as a biracial trans girl), be part of the statistics that come from our a second Trump presidency.
If you won't vote like YOUR life depends on it, vote like someone ELSE'S life depends on it, because IT DOES.
And if you can't even do that much, at least shut the fuck up and stop spreading your poison around. You're wrong. The danger is real. Downplaying it now won't make your conscience feel any clearer when it actually happens, and comforting everyone else downplaying it will just make you that much more complicit.
#unforth rambles#politics#us politics#genocide#genocide tw#i don't know how to tag this#i wish the album was here instead of at my mom's#i want every one of you who think this doesn't matter#to stare at the smiling faces of my long-dead relatives#and see these people who were shot and stabbed and burned and raped and destroyed#who died in rebellion or despair in hopelessness or desperation#no matter how much or how little they fought#they're all ashes now and nothing will bring them back#i have no family in europe#not a single person survived#i won't let my family be the ones who stay too long because we don't take it seriously#and neither should you
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oooh please someday tell us what you think of GOT
oh, no, it's my fatal weakness! it's [checks notes] literally just the bare modicum of temptation! okay you got me.
SO. in order to tell what's wrong with game of thrones you kind of have to have read the books, because the books are the reason the show goes off the rails. i actually blame the showrunners relatively little in proportion to GRRM for how bad the show was (which I'm not gonna rehash here because if you're interested in GOT in any capacity you've already seen that horse flogged to death). people debate when GOT "got bad" in terms of writing, but regardless of when you think it dropped off, everyone agrees the quality declined sharply in season 8, and to a certain extent, season 7. these are the seasons that are more or less entirely spun from whole cloth, because season 7 marks the beginning of what will, if we ever see it, be the Winds of Winter storyline. it's the first part that isn't based on a book by George R.R. Martin. it's said that he gave the showrunners plot outlines, but we don't know how detailed they were, or how much the writers diverged from the blueprint — and honestly, considering the cumulative changes made to the story by that point, some stark divergence would have been required. (there's a reason for this. i'll get there in a sec.)
so far, i'm not saying anything all that original. a lot of people recognized how bad the show got as soon as they ran out of Book to adapt. (I think it's kind of weird that they agreed to make a show about an unfinished series in the first place — did GRRM figure that this was his one shot at a really good HBO adaptation, and forego misgivings about his ability to write two full books in however many years it took to adapt? did he think they would wait for him? did he not care that the series would eventually spoil his magnum opus, which he's spent the last three decades of his life writing? perplexing.) but the more interesting question is why the show got bad once it ran out of Book, because in my mind, that's not a given. a lot of great shows depart from the books they were based on. fanfiction does exactly that, all the time! if you have good writers who understand the characters they're working with, departure means a different story, not a worse one. now, the natural reply would be to say that the writers of GOT just aren't good, or at least aren't good at the things that make for great television, and that's why they needed the books as a structure, but I don't think that's true or fair, either. books and television are very different things. the pacing of a book is totally different from the pacing of a television show, and even an episodic book like ASOIAF is going to need a lot of work before it's remotely watchable as a series. bad writers cannot make great series of television, regardless of how good their source material is. sure, they didn't invent the characters of tyrion lannister and daenerys targaryen, but they sure as hell understood story structure well enough to write a damn compelling season of TV about them!
so but then: what gives? i actually do think it's a problem with the books! the show starts out as very faithful to the early books (namely, A Game of Thrones and A Clash of Kings) to the point that most plotlines are copied beat-for-beat. the story is constructed a little differently, and it's definitely condensed, but the meat is still there. and not surprisingly, the early books in ASOIAF are very tightly written. for how long they are, you wouldn't expect it, but on every page of those books, the plot is racing. you can practically watch george trying to beat the fucking clock. and he does! useful context here is that he originally thought GOT was going to be a trilogy, and so the scope of most threads in the first book or two would have been much smaller. it also helps that the first three books are in some respects self-contained stories. the first book is a mystery, the second and third are espionage and war dramas — and they're kept tight in order to serve those respective plots.
the trouble begins with A Feast for Crows, and arguably A Storm of Swords, because GRRM starts multiplying plotlines and treating the series as a story, rather than each individual book. he also massively underestimated the number of pages it would take him to get through certain plot beats — an assumption whose foundation is unclear, because from a reader's standpoint, there is a fucke tonne of shit in Feast and Dance that's spurious. I'm not talking about Brienne's Riverlands storyline (which I adore thematically but speaking honestly should have been its own novella, not a part of Feast proper). I'm talking about whole chapters where Tyrion is sitting on his ass in the river, just talking to people. (will I eat crow about this if these pay off in hugely satisfying ways in Winds or Dream? oh, totally. my brothers, i will gorge myself on sweet sweet corvid. i will wear a dunce cap in the square, and gleefully, if these turn out to not have been wastes of time. the fact that i am writing this means i am willing to stake a non-negligible amount of pride on the prediction that that will not happen). I'm talking about scenes where the characters stare at each other and talk idly about things that have already happened while the author describes things we already have seen in excruciating detail. i'm talking about threads that, while forgivable in a different novel, are unforgivable in this one, because you are neglecting your main characters and their story. and don't tell me you think that a day-by-day account tyrion's river cruise is necessary to telling his story, because in the count of monte cristo, the main guy disappears for nine years and comes hurtling back into the story as a vengeful aristocrat! and while time jumps like that don't work for everything, they certainly do work if what you're talking about isn't a major story thread!
now put aside whether or not all these meandering, unconcluded threads are enjoyable to read (as, in fairness, they often are!). think about them as if you're a tv showrunner. these bad boys are your worst nightmare. because while you know the author put them in for a reason, you haven't read the conclusion to the arc, so you don't know what that reason is. and even if the author tells you in broad strokes how things are going to end for any particular character (and this is a big "if," because GRRM's whole style is that he lets plots "develop as he goes," so I'm not actually convinced that he does have endings written out for most major characters), that still doesn't help you get them from point A (meandering storyline) to point B (actual conclusion). oh, and by the way, you have under a year to write this full season of television, while GRRM has been thinking about how to end the books for at least 10. all of this means you have to basically call an audible on whether or not certain arcs are going to pay off, and, if they are, whether they make for good television, and hence are worth writing. and you have to do that for every. single. unfinished. story. in the books.
here's an example: in the books, Quentin Martell goes on a quest to marry Daenerys and gain a dragon. many chapters are spent detailing this quest. spoiler alert: he fails, and he gets charbroiled by dragons. GRRM includes this plot to set up the actions of House Martell in Winds, but the problem is that we don't know what House Martell does in Winds, because (see above) the book DNE. So, although we can reliably bet that the showrunners understand (1) Daenerys is coming to Westeros with her 3 fantasy nukes, and (2) at some point they're gonna have to deal with the invasion of frozombies from Canada, that DOESN'T mean they necessarily know exactly what's going to happen to Dorne, or House Martell. i mean, fuck! we don't even know if Martin knows what's going to happen to Dorne or House Martell, because he's said he's the kind of writer who doesn't set shit out beforehand! so for every "Cersei defaults on millions of dragons in loans from the notorious Bank of Nobody Fucks With Us, assumes this will have no repercussions for her reign or Westerosi politics in general" plotline — which might as well have a big glaring THIS WILL BE IMPORTANT stamp on top of the chapter heading — you have Arianne Martell trying to do a coup/parent trap switcheroo with Myrcella, or Euron the Goffick Antichrist, or Faegon Targaryen and JonCon preparing a Blackfyre restoration, or anything else that might pan out — but might not! And while that uncertainty about what's important to the "overall story" might be a realistic way of depicting human beings in a world ruled by chance and not Destiny, it makes for much better reading than viewing, because Game of Thrones as a fantasy television series was based on the first three books, which are much more traditional "there is a plot and main characters and you can generally tell who they are" kind of book. I see Feast and Dance as a kind of soft reboot for the series in this respect, because they recenter the story around a much larger cast and cast a much broader net in terms of which characters "deserve" narrative attention.
but if you're making a season of television, you can't do that, because you've already set up the basic premise and pacing of your story, and you can't suddenly pivot into a long-form tone poem about the horrors of war. so you have to cut something. but what are you gonna cut? bear in mind that you can't just Forget About Dorne, or the Iron Islands, or the Vale, or the North, or pretty much any region of the story, because it's all interconnected, but to fit in everything from the books would require pacing of the sort that no reasonable audience would ever tolerate. and bear in mind that the later books sprout a lot more of these baby-plots that could go somewhere, but also might end up being secondary or tertiary to the "main story," which, at the end of the day, is about dragons and ice zombies and the rot at the heart of the feudal power system glorified in classical fantasy. that's the story that you as the showrunner absolutely must give them an end to, and that's the story that should be your priority 1.
so you do a hack and slash job, and you mortar over whatever you cut out with storylines that you cook up yourself, but you can't go too far afield, because you still need all the characters more or less in place for the final showdown. so you pinch here and push credulity there, and you do your best to put the characters in more or less the same place they would have been if you kept the original, but on a shorter timeframe. and is it as good as the first seasons? of course not! because the material that you have is not suited to TV like the first seasons are. and not only that, but you are now working with source material that is actively fighting your attempt to constrain a linear and well-paced narrative on it. the text that you're working with changed structure when you weren't looking, and now you have to find some way to shanghai this new sprawling behemoth of a Thing into a television show. oh, and by the way, don't think that the (living) author of the source material will be any help with this, because even though he's got years of experience working in television writing, he doesn't actually know how all of these threads will tie together, which is possibly the reason that the next book has taken over 8 years (now 13 and counting) to write. oh and also, your showrunners are sick of this (in fairness, very difficult) job and they want to go write for star wars instead, so they've refused the extra time the studio offered them for pre-production and pushed through a bunch of first-draft scripts, creating a crunch culture of the type that spawns entirely avoidable mistakes, like, say, some poor set designer leaving a starbucks cup in frame.
anyway, that's what I think went wrong with game of thrones.
#using the tags as a footnote system here but in order:#1. quentin MAY not be dead according to some theories but in the text he is a charred corpse#2. arianne is great and i love her but to be honest. my girl is kinda dumb. just 2 b real.#3. faegon is totally a blackfyre i think it's so obvious it may well be text at this point#it's almost r+l = j level man like it's kind of just reading comprehension at this point#4. relatedly there are some characters i think GRRM has endings picked out for and some i think he specifically does NOT#i think stannis melisandre jon and daenerys all will end up the same. jon and dany war crimes => murder/banishment arc is just classic GRRM#but i think jon's reasoning will be different and it'll be better-written.#im sorry but babygirl shireen IS getting flambeed. in response stannis will commit epic battle suicide killing all boltons i hope#brienne will live but in some tragic 'stay awhile horatio' capacity. likely she will try to die defending her liege and fail#faegon will die there's zero chance blackfyres win ever#now jaime/cersei I do NOT think he knows. my brothers in christ i don't think this motherfucker knows who the valonqar is!!#same with tyrion i think that the author in GRRM wants to do a nasty corruption arc + kill him off but the person in him loves him too much#sansa i have no goddamn idea what's going to happen. we just don't know enough about the northern conspiracy to tell#w/ arya i think he has... ideas. i don't think she's going to sail off to Explore i am almost certain that the show doing that was a cover#because the actual idea he gave them was unsavory or nonviable for some reason. bc like.#why would arya leave bran and jon and sansa? the family she's just spent her whole life fighting to come back to and avenge?#this is suspicious this does not feel like arya this does not feel right#bran will not be king or if he is it'll be in a VERY different way not the dumbfuck 'let's vote' bullshit#i personally think bran is going to go full corruption arc and become possessed by the 3 eyed raven. but that could be a pipe dream#the thing is he's way too OP in the show so the books have to nerf him and i think GRRM is still trying to work out#a way to actually do that.#i don't think he told them what happened with littlefinger or sansa. i think sansa's story is vaguely similar#(stark restoration through the female line etc)#but the queen in the north shit is way too contrived frankly. and selfishly i hope she gets something different#being a monarch in ASOIAF is not a happy ending. we know this from the moment we meet robert baratheon in AGOT#and we learn exactly what GRRM thinks of the people who 'win' these endless wars of succession#and they are not heroes#they are not celebrated#and they are neither safe nor happy
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So...
holy shit this conversation, i have. so many thoughts.
i'm like, 80% sonic is gonna face some kind of betrayal from either dread or nine
#nine because he is the most important variant obviously so his betrayal would hit harder#also because he wanted to use a shard to create his own perfect world. and sonic needs them to fix his#also also because it's likely fixing sonic's world would make the shatterverse dissappear#and with nine having researched the shards i find it likely he could be the one to find out about the consecuences of fixing the cristal#and i doubt he would be a fan of the whole dissapearing to instead become a part of someone else thing#plus he was the one named during the conversation about the people from the shatterspaces#and in the trailer for s2 we had images of him implying he would meet the other tails#i'm not saying he's gnna be EVIL but he might be against sonic at some point#and in the case of dread#WE the audience know he's selfish and only cares about himself and his treasure#but neither his crew nor sonic found out about that#i find it unlikely they would just let him get away with using people like that#so at some point he's gonna have to do something that outs him as the ruthless person he is#plus he is OBSESSED with his shard. why would he let sonic keep it#we know the council gets hold of his shard at some point#so maybe they loose it on their first appearaence this “season” and then he cooperates to get his shard back#but when the moment comes to let sonic have it (after recovering the shard) he steals it or something#sonic prime#sonic prime season 2#sonic prime spoilers#sonic prime season2#sonic prime s2
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I sometimes wonder if Curt and Owen just wanted a normal relationship. I mean, their relationship is anything but normal. They’re both spies, that’s the obvious one. Either one of them could die on any random mission and the other would need to more on and accept it. I do think they would have wanted something that was more ordinary, where they didn’t need to worry all the time. About them dying, but also getting caught. They can’t just be together, it needs to be secret and kept to themselves. Clearly Curt is sick of his mom asking when he’s getting a girlfriend, he can’t tell her that he has someone because of fear of everything that comes after that.
And now I’m just thinking about all the stuff they’d do if they weren’t held back from doing it. Moving in together and not being questioned about it, seeing each other whenever they wanted to, doing all that sappy couple shit. Of course, their locations don’t help with this either. I don’t think either of them would be willing to move to either of their countries, even if they were free too.
Jesus, the world is against these poor silly guys, isn’t it? :(
#spies are forever#tin can bros#tin can brothers#owen carvour#agent curt mega#curtwen#I’m just thinking about them idk#I don’t even know if either of them would want a normal#i dont think they’d ever tell each other that#It’s going back to my idea that they were both worried the other didn’t love them as much as they thought they did#I just feel that they were both really lonely people#I mean let’s face it neither of them probably have many friends#Curt looks so happy to call Tati his friend#Like this man is so happy to have a friend he can talk to#Owen was Curt’s best friend#Maybe Curt’s best friend is whoever he can talk to
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A little obsessed with the fact that pearl really wanted to team w impulse and ended up back in ggg because of it. From like every angle I’m a little obsessed with it.
#impulse who wears the brand of traitor being sought after by the woman defined as left-behind. neither of them wanted what they are called.#and neither really ARE what they’re called but it still defines their every move going forwards#already those same pasts come back to haunt them!! Scott and Cleo teasing abt double life and Cleo reminding impulse how he’s hurt ppl#in previous series#(yes I’m being dramatic about all this shut up and let me)#but like. the traitor wanted to start over and make up for his mistakes. the abandoned only wanted the traitor.#and now they’re currently stuck with two people who would be so ride or die for them if they weren’t what they are#wild life spoilers#wild life#alienkeep#<idk what other team/duo name they have
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Kai cenat is gonna play bloodborne im sorry but im gatekeeping
#nothing against the guy i appreciate his enthusiasm#yet this will draw some attention from the more... well! not so versed people#i dont know but frol all the souls games bloodborne feels like the one you gotta take more delicately#maybe its the lore or worldbuilding but honestly#i dont want to see new fans take us back to the gehrman discourse#neither with the doll or anything i hate when female characters get watered down to jack off material#and considering in bloodborne theres quite a lot of them that are wonderful ladies with their flaws im afraid they wont appreciate them#same with the males! especially if we are speaking of lets say laurence micolash etc all those guys#people sometimes refuse to put aside characters deeper lores in exchange of a shallow view#and honestlt even if NOT everyone will get into the lore it just feels like#if youre not gonna bother with the lore dont just go around talking smack ykwim#ughhhjhhhhhhhh#i just dont like the brainrot fans they got 3 jokes and none of them are funny#im fucking sick of sellen fj jokes they are repetitive#even worse when the fj jokes are under cosplayer vids like didnt we learn decorum#good lord sorry for the yap im a little pissed
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thinking about isobel and ketheric, and my durge and ketheric, and isobel and my durge
like ketheric whos entire personality is centered around being a failed father, dirge who lives solely and exclusively for a father who does not love him, isobel being horribly violated for the sake of fatherly love in the name of a person shell never be again like excuse me this trio of people makes me go insane
ketheric and dirge like!! zealot recognizes zealot, ketheric knows what its like to be devoted wholeheartedly to a god who will discard you and thats explicitly why he has a businesslike relationship with myrkul, who KNOWSSS ketherics heart isnt in it but doesnt care, ketheric who never fully believed in the absolute plan but carried it out nonetheless, ketheric who nonsensically traded the death of the world for his daughters life, who in reality most likely traded his afterlife for isobels life, knowingly condemning himself to never see melodia again, to an eternity of torture at myrkuls hands, just so isobel can breathe again. dirge knowing with perfect clarity his own father would never do that for him. ketheric knowing that kind of hopeless devotion and willful blind ignorance leads to a kind of iron will that makes dirge genuinely dangerous but pitying the poor fool nonetheless because despite dirges clear intelligence and skill, despite his overwhelmingly obvious power, hes shackled to a self destructive idiot whod bite off his own arm just to spite the world who couldnt give a single fuck about dirges mental state or how that affects achieving bhaals OWN goals and fulfilling his OWN desires, because ketheric understands perfectly well a god will be stupid and selfish first and reasonable and measured second. dirge hating ketheric not just for being a wishywashy traitor who cant settle on something to be devoted to, but because ketheric has the shit figured out. its a zero sum game. theres no winning, only different types of losers, and embracing that truth means acknowledging his entire life has been a pointless self destructive waste that will never give him the satisfaction and actualization dirge craves, so its easier and more stable to just interpret ketheric as a coward. except hes going to kill himself for isobel. going to go through hell for her. theres a level of devotion and love and care there that dirge has only experienced once in his life and the memory of it is enough to drive him to madness, but despite it all ketheric IS competent. is level and measured and powerful and capable of looking past his own self interest to the far horizon of victory, is tactical and clever and willing to wade into the fray. so dirge hates, and admires, and envies, and pities, and reflexively seeks out and avoids ketheric in equal measure. wants to carve him up until he finally breaks, screaming for a god that wont hear him as just rewards for his insolence (because dirges loyalty will SURELY be rewarded, loyalty to his god and to his father, certainly), cant stand the idea of working alongside anyone else, hates being around him but hates doing things without him, falling into old habits of depravity just to get away from the cacophany of emotion and the introspection it tries to trigger.
and then ketheric is doing all of this for someone who doesnt really exist. the isobel he wants to revive isnt real. its a version of her thats stripped hollow of the things that make her, HER. he wants an isobel that doesnt love aylin, he wants an isobel that is content to remain in place and be protected by him, where he was the center of her world. he wants an isobel that hasnt existed for over a century. he wants an isobel like he remembers thinking of the days before melodia died. its why despite everything he gives up for her, if ketheric gets his hands on isobel he tadpoles her. the tadpoles are just a convenient tool for cutting away the unnecessary parts of a person, things they dont need and wont want afterwards. isobel mourns the father she had after her mother died, but ketheric wants the isobel she used to be when melodia was still present in their lives. the isobel after melodia died eventually left him for aylin. grew up and became a person outside of their small family and community. had interests and desires and goals that took her away from him. she doesnt need aylin, doesnt need anything besides family. thats whats important, thats whats worth ruining lives over. everything after isobel was just a failed copy, not even worth reminiscing over. everyone beyond isobel doesnt matter. desecrate the family tomb, abuse your son, drag your aunts and uncles and brothers and sisters out from the grave just to see if it works, if it sticks, because the whole world revolves around a little girl who stopped existing long before she died, because she became someone else someone new and left you floundering alone. youll get them back even if it means you burn in hell forever, those few precious moments are worth it, itll all be worth it, its already worth it. kill yourself kill the world because the only god worth dying for is the one found in between poorly scratched letters on a paper rotting from age that say "love you papa, -I T". live every day with the smoke and the rot knowing that your father loved you so much he cant even look at who you are now. live every day knowing its a gift you cant return to a man who doesnt see you, knowing that all youll ever have are ghosts that seek to hollow you out and play pretend with the shell. hes awful. hes horrible. hes a monster. hes your dad and he loves you so much its killing you. will kill you. has killed you. has killed everything you could ever want in your life. hes your dad. he read you stories when you were small. kept you from falling apart when your mother died. your rock in stormy seas. he wants to read you another story. its dark outside. its scary. this story has a happy ending. its just for you. the girl in the picture book has your name but doesnt look like you at all. its written in silver blood. theres an ache that wont leave, a rot that refuses to mend, a scar that wont close, and its all for love
thinking about dirge being the one to drag isobel from her coffin, to bring her back for the sake of sealing a pact that will end the world, going against his entire religion the whole reason for his existence just for the sake of fulfilling his own fathers dreams. children living at the behest of their parents, denied death for their fathers selfish whims. isobel autopsied and opened, layers peeled back. gortash and ketheric never exhumed a body, never prepared it for the grave, never made such an intimate study of death. gortash unwilling to bloody himself unnecessarily, ketheric unwilling to look past the deathmask to see isobels interior, so its dirge, it has to be him, the only one willing to bite down his own desires for the greater good. an unforgivable violation of autonomy, but the only one who thinks of it as such is the scion of the murder god. she cant consent. she cant choose to be apart of this, to sacrifice herself for a cause greater than herself. he has to inflict this upon her. life is suffering and madness and delusion. death is peace, and he is the holy vessel of transition from one state to the other. this? this is blasphemy. she has already fled this horrid blighted world for a better one, and here he is participating in blasphemous ritual. its for the sake of their plan, its for the sake of enacting his fathers dreams (as all children know, you are naught but a vessel to achieve the goals they could not in their time), but she cannot even take glory in the knowledge of her sacrifice, cannot even know she is a sacrifice until its too late to go back. carves open and peels back the picturesque skin, preserved by gloom and arid darkness and sealed stone to keep away the rot. peeling away the mask of Isobel Thorm to see the visceral rotting insides of a person ketheric cant stand to see.
clearing away the ruin and decay so something new can take its place. corpses are objects fled of souls, no longer a person, no longer anything and thus free to toy and play with as boredom and curiosity desires, but this is not a thing. this will again be a person, a vessel to trap someone inside of, to force them to suffer and persist and delude and live and he cant even ask if shell do it. do it to help him break the world and put an end to this madness forever. cant convince her of the rightousness of it, the necessity of it, cant help but use her for it. to gortash she is a token exchanged for power, to ketheric she is a snapshot of a better world he wants to go back to, but only here on this dirty bloodstained table with a bhaalspawn elbow deep in her organs is she a person, whos autonomy and personhood is being irrevocably violated. his nature is to free them of these shackles, to snip the cords and revel in the ensuing destruction, and here he is binding her again. the humiliation, the horror, of being set loose from this hellscape only to be brought back. to be dragged, kicking and screaming, back into living. to be subject to such awful blasphemy. here in the dark and the quiet where there is no voice to speak back to him, when there is no rushing blood or beating hearts to call forth his purpose, there and then does armageddons prophet desire forgiveness, only in this shadowed purgatory can someone truly see. when all the world lies dead at my feet, i will beg forgiveness from no one but you. lamb on the altar, holy blood, if such desecration was not necessary for the cleansing of suffering, i would never deign to subject you to it. to you alone do i tender my apologies, my blessed father may forgive this sin in light of the retribution it will call forth, but cruel fate has chosen you without your knowledge to bear this disgusting violation, and the only salve i can offer is that, gods willing, you will not suffer long. to live in a world that could give rise to something like me is a torture i would not wish upon anyone, and for the sake of my father i inflict it upon you nonetheless. when you rise, my only thoughts will be of murder, holy and pure. but here in the dark, when you are at peace and i am not, i think of you, and what youd want, and how no one would ever, COULD ever, ask for what i do to you here. here in the quiet i breathlessly whisper a prayer meant only for your ears, a second sin i cannot stop myself from committing, here where you cannot hear me but God surely can, a wish that i will surely pay for dearly, a punishment i endure willingly and without complaint, a smallest fraction of the torment i knowingly inflict upon you. i live, and soon so shall you, and for that, i will never know peace.
im so sorry. i did it for love
#bg3 durge#bg3#bg3 dark urge#bg3 isobel#bg3 ketheric#ketheric thorm#isobel thorm#dirgecore#dirgeposting#like just for the record this is my particular durge but AUGHHHHHHH#dirge being the only person who routinely and regularly thinks about isobel as a person instead of as a symbol#dirge who consistently chooses her at every crossroads even when it hurts him#isobel who gets a second chance at life twice over because of him#dirge sacrificing his religious beliefs (literally the ONLY thing he lives for) to participate in bringing isobel back#dirge fighting off the urge (which makes him attack his loved ones!!!) because he refuses to hurt her#dirge making an enemy of shar because he wont let shadowheart become a gods pawn and he wont sacrifice aylin for the conditional love of go#isobel who didnt want to die. didnt know how to live after reviving. getting her life AND a reason to live back because of dirge#who lost everything because of the domino effects of those choices#who got his own second chance because of those choices#like it really is just that quiet moment where neither of them can talk to the other#because shes dead and he isnt#and then they BOTH get new lives free of their fathers because of it#LIKE AUGHHHHHHH IM SO FUCKING NORMALLLL#ITS SEEING EACH OTHER WHEN NO ONE ELSE WILL!!!#in that silent tomb. ''your a person. i see you even if your father doesnt''.#and then AGAIN back to him in last light!!! ''your a person. i see you even if your father doesnt'' LIKE!!!!#ARE YOU PEOPLE SEEING THIS!!!!
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i keep constructing elaborate political speeches in my mind. as if somehow if i could just talk to pvv-voters compellingly enough, explain to all of em why this is moronic on every level, they'd all suddenly find out that they're actually leftists at heart who just heard a few facts wrong
#as if the racism is an accident instead of the driving force#i spent too long looking at twitter replies and there are a lot of people who voted for wilders so obviously a lot of different types too#theres the naive ones who genuinely seem to regard politics as kind of a game thats being played to the sidelines#you cheer for your team but it doesn't ACTUALLY have an effect on reality. So stop complaining! cheer up!#theres the dumb ones who 'just wanted something different' and who thought 'well the Left screwed things up'#- weve had a centrist/right government for over a decade -#'so lets try the right ¯\_(ツ)_/¯'#and then theres just the unapologetically islamophobic who DEFINITELY are NOT racist~#they júst want all brown people to go back to 'their own' country#and if you call thát racist! well then! you are protecting the fundamental rights of muslims right to religion so obviously you also suppor#extremist governments in the middle east! and those are also discriminatory! which somehow makes the pvv nót discriminatory even though#they're drawing a direct comparison between themselves and these extremist governments! so there!#... anyways#very very very minor point but this also once again strengthens my resolve to not reblog or dive into every terrible news story from#usamerican politics despite how guilt-trippy posts about them get;#cause the only people on tumblr ive seen reblog aaanything at all about these results are dutch themselves#ik its not like we have a similar influence to the entire usa at all. but neither does random kentucky county elected official number 9 and#i still hear about them all the time#it makes sense for the circles im in dont get me wrong. just annoying.#joos yaps#delete later
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My mini contribution to @echoes-lighthouse's Evil Slasher Orphanage! My wife Anna and I are here to help, and brought a few more kids of our own.
I really thought I was a horror fan until I sat down to draw this and came up blank. I guess I'm not a slasher guy, because a LOT more Monsters and Beasts came to mind, so it took a while to form a list. Though I did include Sam who is certainly a Creeture but.. They're human enough.
#Emile's Arts#Proud Parent Posting#Slasher Orphanage#I'm stealing the Entity's abilities from DBD and giving them to me#And then immediately using them on accident to bring all these kids into one reality#That doesn't have to be canon to the orphanage obviously I just love being an Eldritch Being but Stupid#Also Friday the 13th is a movie in the Scream franchise so I thought this was a fun way to explain that fkjsdfkdfdkj#Honorable mention goes out to Frankenstien's Monster he is my baby but I could not for the life of me choose a design for him#I knew I KNEW I wanted Brandon immediately amazing concept that movie horrid execution#What if you had the powers of God in Middle School. You'd kill people right??? Right.#Also Sam Trick R Treat my beloved amazing Comic series that I love their design and energy#Spirit of Halloween little guy#One year I will dress up as them.. one year#ALSO BUBBA#I was so surprised Bubba wasn't in the original Orphanage cast he's SUCH a sweet pea I love him#Do not let him in the kitchen I don't care how big and wet his puppy eyes are do not let him in there#I also included Billy Trick R Treat because I wanted to the kid who plays him in the movie adaptation is very cute#And I LOVE a murderous little kid it's incredibly funny to me#More honorable mentions I considered;#Fran Bow and Misfortune but neither of them are Slashers on Purpose really#Misfortune is just a victim and IF Fran did kill her parents it wasn't her own choice#Six LN as well I love her but again... Not really a slasher. Also she's like two feet tall#I also though M3gan but eeeeeeeeeeeh I dunno I might come back to that#I was thinking about Rin Dead By Daylight as well and she's still on the table I think she'd fit in#I was also originally going to do The New King from Chzo Mythos but changed to John just because he's more Slasher Child than DaCabe#And again I kept running through Monsters like from Crypt TV and such and decided against them#Me my children my wife and this random person who's farm we stumbled across and are now crashing in#It's fine Anna's very use to Farm Labor she'll be a great help#And she is VERY calm comforting mother-y when she eventually calms down#She's gonna dote all over those girls
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y’know i started talking about brnine/gucci as a joke but now im actually so so serious about it
#they both lost their best friends#(albeit in VERY different ways but neither of them is ever going to get what they once had back)#so like OF COURSE they’ve gravitated to one another#brnine is nothing like clem except for in the ways they are#and gucci is nothing like valence except for the ways she is#and because of this they are each other’s five year long horrible nightmare rebounds#they both want to move on so bad but they aren’t allowed to#Brnine literally lives in the ship that Valence got for them (the ship they got for Brnine instead of fulfilling their own drive clock)#and Gucci still has to be in contact with Clem semi regularly because she’s the leader of a major group on Palisade!!!!#I refuse to believe Gucci has let go of clem#like that’s her childhood best friend#like sure people cut ties with people they were close with all the time#but that’s frankly boring and too easy to me#I want to see the conflict this creates in gucci#I wanna see how to complicates her ability to command in a revolution#pls ignore me these are the ramblings of a mad man (I had a BIG coffee and now I’m vibrating and scared)
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.
#My little sister is an asshole- dad was warned by mom when she was like 14 and he did nothing by mom of all people#she's callous-hurtful-abusive-underhanded-crass-and somehow draws people to her despite giving the aura of “toxic”#He was asking me if I liked the new car-I said no because she was in it- that she didn't bother meeting my eyes nor greeting me#Only reason she was driving was to rub it in that “daddy loves me the best- look at my car he bought me”#It has taken every ounce of restraint I have to not look at her son and tell him every beating I've taken because of and on her behalf#But that is between me and her until it isn't- I hated being pitted against my parents even when they were being vile#Dad's excuse for letting it all happen is that he wasn't the one in the crosshairs cuz somehow that negates the EVIL she did to us#I have been made aware of TWO other instances besides mine of her literally trying to get someone to off themselves- unforgivable#Makes me wonder if she has gotten away with it before and is chasing that high again- I'd like to think not but I am not discounting my gut#I really wish that at least one adult in my life had given a fuck about how we were going to end up- one emotionally mature adult#Then! Dad tried to defend himself about pulling a gun on her ex- like taking a dog was worth a fucking life- give me a break asshole#If you cared at fucking all about the kid you wouldn't have immediately sided with the monster just because of shared blood#But hey- I'm the one that needs to inherit the shitshow from him- if I outlive him- Kinda hope the universe is spiteful and lets me off 1st#Is having a place to get away from this so I don't have to rely on them so much to ask for? I don't want their affection anymore#I really want out of this family- I don't even want to help the kids anymore- does that make me selfish?- I don't know#I have been trying to talk to babysis about any of this given our small bond- but it's so gd fleeting- we're all terminally lonely people#I long for a place I have never been- people I haven't met- warmth I've never known. spirituality has nothing for me#neither does the mundane#Let me get this story out of my head and hands and we'll circle back to the topic of escape. I just want to sleep now- so I'll do just that
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I dont need to say anything
If it's true, it will be known
#im high#and thinking so many thoughts#too many thoughts#they dont need to be spelled out#they can just exist#its fine#don't worry about it#you have nothing to fix#it doesn't matter if ur right or wrong#dick talking#best outcome is to forever not say anything#you didnt do anything#you didnt come onto him#you didn't flirt with him#you didn't do anything#you need to learn you don't need to love everyone that shows you a little bit of affection#you'll find people who actually and actually want you#you dont need to settle or force yourself to think of others#or force yourself into thinking the other person likes you#youre allowed to just have friends#you can be upset that he doesn't like you like that back#but you don't need to say anything about it#you dont need confirmation#or closure#you're overthinking it regardless#just let things be#what other people think of me is none of my business#let them tell me#i am not a mind reader#neither are they
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