#leave sapphics alone i beg of you

[talesfromarandomsapphic]

So I was just talking to a friend about this:

We collectively could only come up with three.

Notice the THREE!

Three happy sapphic couples in media that actually are allowed to be together.

Isn't that sad? That there's only three?

That didn't have to...yah know...die or break up or be toxic or...bad rep?

[cranberryjuice-posts]

Clarisse x femreader where reader broke up with Clarisse cause she thought Clarisse could do better than her and eventually Clarisse corners her and demands answers to why reader broke up with her. Begging on Clarisse’s part to get back together.

If you don’t want to do this you don’t have too!

- a helping hand -

Pairings - Clarisse La Rue x Fem! Loner! Reader

An - sorry this took so long to get out I’m also working on my AO3 series and writing the chapters takes a lil while 😭😭

You aimlessly walked around the camp. With it being officially one month after your breakup with clarisse— or rather you dumping the girl.

The moon provided enough light for you, that and the large bonfire that took place in the background. The singing and joking was all fun and games but you really just preferred to be alone.

A few steps into the woods you let out a deep breath. Saying a silent thankyou to nyx the goddess of the night for bringing you some peace in this shitty situation.

You loved clarisse, more than she would ever know. While she preferred to train in the arena beating her siblings to a pulp you liked to paint in the art pavilion. Your dates were always something elaborate but private enough that you both could spend time just alone.

Your insecurities got the best of you however. Ofcourse you saw how other girls looked at her I mean just look at her. Clarisse was a tall well fit masculine girl, she was every lesbian or sapphics dream.

She deserved better. While you preferred to be alone she was always the center of attention.. She deserved someone confident, who could keep up with her ever changing schedule and someone who could share the spotlight.

Your final straw was seeing her flirt with Ramona, a daughter of Apollo who looked a little to much like Rapunzel. Of course she’d go after a girl like that— the complete opposite of you.

Taking a spot by the creek you took your shoes off letting your feet relax in the cold water. The silence got you out of your head helped you finally relax. Looking up quickly you saw a deer standing before you, poised and unafraid.

You stood up walking into the ankle deep water making your way over to the buck. Feeling a strange sense pulling you to it.

It nuzzled into your body, it’s horns tangling into you. You chuckled softly rubbing its straw like hair. The moment was short lived— a stick broke causing the buck to become skittish and run off.

“There you are Jesus” a voice you wish you could forget spoke behind you. Turning around you saw clarisse standing with her arms crossed. “I saw you ran off and I just wanted to make sure you were ok”

“I’m fine” you bluntly spoke making your way back to your shoes.

She just rolled her eyes. “Uh huh and I take it you becoming emotionally attached to a wild animal is also you being fine” she teased. Once you got up you tried to leave only to be stopped by the woman with her grabbing your wrist.

“Common Dont leave” she sighed. “Look I’m sorry.. I just want to Talk, can we do that please you at-least owe me that”

Clarisse was right, like normal. Giving a dramatic sigh you agreed. “Fine” you shrugged your shoulders.

———

At first you expected the conversation to be awkward, though your expectations changed when it went the complete opposite direction.

Here you were snorting as clarisse told you about some story with her and her brothers. “It’s not That Funny you jerk” she laughed gently shoving you.

You just continued to laugh bumping into her. “It’s hilarious” You retaliated.

“Uh huh sure” she chuckled grabbing your arms with a smile. Before you could stop yourself you leaned up kissing her. The kiss was short, the realization set in immediately causing you to pull back quickly.

“I’m sorry” you rushed. “I shouldn’t I—“

Before you could finish clarisse wrapped an arm around your waist, the other cupping your face as she quickly pulled you into another kiss. Instead of rejecting it this time you placed your arms around her neck. Accept it rather than blocking it.

You both tilted your heads allowing one another to have better reach in the kiss. After dating for almost a year you both learned one another’s strengths and weaknesses in kissing.

Letting out a soft moan you pulled away, keeping her close though. “Why..” she panted. “Why did you end it” her question was blunt and straight to the point.

You debated on answering her question, not sure if she’d like the real answer. “Because you deserve someone better” you whispered against her lips. Clarisse broke the small space causing you both to have breathing room. “What?!” Her tone was more upset if anything.

“Look It’s not That It’s Just”

“Just What?! I deserve someone better the hell does that mean” she slapped her arms to her thighs.

“It means that I’m not the best for you clarisse!” You finally yelled. “I stay to myself I like to be alone, people think I’m weird and I see how they laugh at me! Clarisse you deserve someone who isn’t a fucking shut in”

“And who decided I wanted someone else?!” She yelled back causing you to stay quiet. What did she mean by that. “You dumb ignorant fool” Clarisse sighed rubbing her eyes. Letting her hands drop down she grabbed your body once more. “I don’t want anyone else, you’re the only person for me— the only person I want. You understand” her tone much calmer. “Please don’t ever think I didn’t want you— babe I came after you because i still love you”

You felt your eyes water at her words. You just nodded breaking down in her arms. “Besides Ramona is way to fucking loud” you just laughed through the tears making her smile.

———

Walking back to camp holding hands you noticed in the corner of you eye the buck from before. Standing as calm as ever.

Your eyes seemed to play tricks on you as the deer shifted from a buck to a tall woman with dark flowing hair to back to an animal.

Silently you said yet another Thank-you to Nyx. She might not of been a major goddess but she did her part.

[nevermoreconfessions]

Hey there, buddy. I hope you're having a good day by the time you read this.

Okay, here's the thing, my brain occasionally chooses to remember little details that come back to haunt me and hit me in the skull like a fucking boomerang. And due to the last chapter of the free pass, I come to leave here the one that has bothered me the most lately for you to suffer with me.

Why on earth would Thaddeus want anyone to talk to Lenore and why would Ira consent to that?

No. Seriously. When Annabel tries to ask about Lenore, Thaddeus even denies having a daughter, why would he want to alleviate Lenore's loneliness by asking a young woman about her own age to visit her for company? On Ira's side, yes, the man wants Thaddeus to like him, but the guy seems like someone pretty obsessed with appearances, why would he want his precious daughter to be related to a potentially dangerous lunatic who is locked in the attic?

That makes me think the fact that they asked Annabel was a lie. But then, how did Annabel find out about Lenore? What were her intentions in wanting to meet her?

I have more. But this one has been eating me alive now that we had another flashback.

Oh, my favorite blog sent me a submission. Yes, buddy, we're suffering together. Have been for a little while, considering how I feel about the topic.

I think about Thaddeus and his actions quite a lot (when I'm reminded of his existence), actually, because he's an enigma. He's my version of a walking paradox.

Let's say he did contact Annabel Lee to be, as she had quoted, "A good influence for his hysterical daughter." He had done so with the knowledge that Annabel Lee was a temporary friend, that Lenore was forever going to be a spinster, and after that?

Nothing. No husband, no friends, no life outside of the Vandernact estate. Just a good, influenced "lady" in a house on her own.

Why?

One can only assume that in some sickening way, Thaddeus cared. He cared as much as a misogynistic Victorian man mourning his son, the only heir to the estate and wealth, can possibly be.

I can somewhat back this train of thought up with episode 65: he did seem shocked at the news of his daughter's possible death. That was the face of a man with fear in his heart. Then, after denying that he had a daughter in the first place, he looked...guilty. Truly and utterly guilty. For a moment, I pitied him.

Just for a single moment.

That then begs the question (isn't this a complicated topic?) — why did he then deny Lenore's existence?

Well, I have a theory or two.

1. He was not alone. There were servants in that room, and we all know that Thaddeus had intented to keep Lenore's existence a secret between himself and Annabel Lee.

2. Stay with me on this one, because its held together by bubblegum and a bent paperclip. Are we all aware of the stages of grief? First came the shock. We've seen that on Thaddeus's face. Then, there's denial.

Onto Ira.

Well, I can see this one. Annabel Lee did say that this was an arrangement made by their fathers — so, what did Ira, a man obsessed with appearances, get in return for his saught-after daughter to chill out with a mad woman?

I'm not sure if this has been noticed, but the Whitlocks are staying in the Vandernact's estate in New York for the social season. That's a pretty big favor.

There's no downside on Ira's side if all goes according to plan. Annabel Lee makes a friend with a girl whose existence is to be kept secret, all while Ira finally finds her a eligible husband in New York.

I suppose neither Thaddeus nor Ira considered the fact that their daughters might be achingly sapphic and fall for each other in the process, subsequently leading Lenore to burn an entire house to the ground for the slim chance of Annabel Lee's hand in marriage.

Isn't this a complicated situation?

[her-satanic-wiles]

October 11th

Sensory Deprivation, Cirrus x Reader

Masterlist

Words: 1.5k

Warnings: Sensory deprivation; spanking; sapphicism; established relationship; soft dom!Cirrus; reader’s a little bratty shit; temperature play; nipple play; use of sex toys; praise kink; squirting;

Taglist: @sodoswitchimage @enchantedbunny @bitchywitchygardener @thew0man @sodomiser @the-did-i-ask @copias-sewer-rat @gehrmansbignaturals

🔞 MDNI 🔞

Cirrus made sure your hands were the first to go; lying you on your back and tying your wrists together and securing them to the metal headboard. She always made a habit of making sure they were tight enough that you couldn’t slip out of them, as more than a handful of times you’d done that and cackled about it to her face. You still think about the punishment she gave you afterward. You were so sensitive for a solid week.

Your eyes were the next to go; a soft, satin, black strip wrapped around your head blocking out any light remaining in the room. She loved toying with you, taking her time and making you squirm for her, fidget in anticipation of what she had planned. You trusted her wholeheartedly of course - you wouldn’t allow yourself to get put in this position without total trust of your safety and well being. But there was a thrill that came with this demon that kept you on your toes. You never knew what she was going to do next.

“Remember your safeword?” She asked.

“Teletubby.”

She smacked your thigh. “I’m going to fucking kill you.”

You tried to move away, your bratty giggles loudly bouncing off the walls of her bedroom. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” You pleaded.

“What’s the safeword?”

“I won’t have to use it, so I don’t even know why we have one.”

She smacked your thigh again. “If you don’t tell me what it is right now we stop playing.” Her tone was serious, and serious Cirrus was an insanely hot Cirrus. It made heat pour into your core.

“Oranges.”

“Thank you. Little shit.”

You felt the bed release where she’d stood and your ears stopped picking up the sound of her footsteps where she’d clearly left the room, leaving you tied and vulnerable to her bed. Left secured and alone, you had never felt wetter in your life. You didn’t even hear her close the door - knowing Cirrus she did, she would never put you in that position unless you explicitly asked for it, but the thought that anyone could walk passed and see you stark naked and restrained like that had your hips bucking in search of releasing the tension that was building. You were so desperate to have something or someone touch you it was almost pathetic.

You didn’t even hear her return, but all you felt was something impossibly cold on your stomach. The feel of the intense temperature change had you gasping in shock, and your body moving to get away from it despite being tied to the bed. “C-cold!” You exclaimed.

“I should hope so,” she taunted, “it’s been in the freezer for a long time.”

The actually object itself felt heavy, even though her hand was holding most of the weight. The material was hard and unbending, and so, obnoxiously cold. She moved it from the middle of your stomach and traced it over one nipple, making you hiss at the feeling, before she moved it to the other. The two buds now stood erect and providing Cirrus more ground to play and tease you with.

Just as your nipples were beginning to get used to the sensation, she lifted the object and removed it completely. The sound of something heavy dropping into a full container confused you. That was until the cold sensation was back on your nipples, but this time softer and much wetter. Ice. She was now rubbing ice all over your body. You moaned at the feeling, your desperate and empty hole clenching around nothing as you wordlessly begged for more. But due to your combined heats and the temperature of the room, it wasn’t long before the ice died.

But that clearly wasn’t a problem for her as her cold hands moved to your clit and rubbed, the shocking temperature contrast having you screaming out once more. She circled your clit a few times, with a small amount of pressure, not enough to have you feeling good, but just enough to have you needing more. That was when she replaced her fingers with another ice cube, rubbing it all over your vulva to get you prepared and melt a bit, but then placing what was left of it directly on your swollen bundle of nerves.

“Oh, fuck!” You yelled in surprise, your hips bucking up sharply.

She simply chuckled in response, and you knew she was having the best time torturing you.

Once the ice had melted away she stopped all contact for a brief moment. You could hear the ice in the bucket moving and adjusting as she retrieved the item that she put inside of it. You felt it prod at your entrance and push inside slowly. There was little stretch and zero resistance, meaning that she was about to fuck you with your glass dildo that had been dunked in an ice bucket for you didn’t know how long. “Cirrus!” Her name came out of your mouth as a shocked gasp again more than a moan, but there was no denying just how incredible it felt. She sank the toy all the way inside you and bent down to give your lips a chaste kiss.

“How does it feel, baby girl?” She asked.

“S-so fucking c-cold!”

“Is it good?”

“Yes! Yes it feels good! Please move!”

“Aw,” you could hear her pouting, her tone became condescending, “only good? I guess you don’t like it then. I’ll stop.”

“No! Don’t stop! It feels incredible. I love it! Please!”

She laughed at you again. “Good girl.”

She moved the dildo and angled it perfectly, making sure it hit your g-spot every time. She’d learnt your body pretty quickly when you first became a thing, and did everything she could to have you seeing stars. The glass dildo was always a favourite of both of you. You because it felt incredible. The heaviness of it combined with the firmness and the ribbed shaft meant that every inch of your cunt felt some kind of pleasure. The weightiness provided the perfect pressure to ensure that you would always have a great time with it. She, on the other hand, much preferred using it to her fingers because you always squirted with it - without fail. And it was never a small trickle that would cascade out of you like a waterfall, no. It was cartoonish or pornographic. It was always like the tsunami gates opened when they weren’t meant to and the ocean would just come pouring out. If she didn’t see it herself, there’d be no way she’d believe any person could do such a thing. But you could, and she loved it.

She bent forward again, her hot breath enveloping your nipple and alternate between sucking and licking it. The stark contrast between the cold dildo currently ramming into your cunt vs. her hot breath put you in almost a state of delirium. As good as the dildo was, though, it wasn’t anywhere near close to tipping you over the edge.

“Cirrus!” You called.

“What, baby?” Her tone was always so patronising when she drove you insane like this, and it only heightened your arousal. It made you feel pathetic, desperate, needy. And you loved it.

“I need you.”

“You have me.”

“I need more.”

“More?” She continued to thrust the dildo inside of you, now hitting the tip of your cervix. The angle this time was downwards, knowing what you wanted from her. The base of the dildo, every time it reentered you, scraped barely against the bottom of your clit. It was driving you mad. “But I’m already giving you so much! Is my girl being greedy today?”

“Please, I want to cum so badly!”

“Is this not enough for you, baby? Hm? What else do you need? Tell me.”

“Y-your fingers, please!”

“So polite! Good girl. Where do you want them? Here?” She began to pinch and tweak the nipple she was just sucking on.

“No! My clit. Play with my clit.”

“Such a good girl for me.”

She obliged your request, shifting further down the bed so she had complete access to your core. Her thumb began rubbing your clit as her other hand continued to work the dildo inside of you. You could hear the sound of your own slick squelching as she fucked you over the sounds of your unashamed and wanton moans.

“Sathanas!” You screamed. “I’m gonna cum!”

“No, pretty girl. What do we say first?”

“Please let me cum!”

“Good girl. Cum for me.”

It seemed to happen all of a sudden. The knot in your stomach that was ever tightening snapped, and you came around the dildo. You felt yourself let go completely, hearing your own slick pouring out of you and Cirrus’ voice talking you through it. Always her good girl. Always so good for her.

Pulling the dildo out of you felt like torture because she dragged it so slowly. You felt so empty and sensitive, and you whimpered at the loss of contact. “Now, now,” she gently scolded you, “you can’t be the only one to have all the fun.”

She removed you from your restraints and gently rubbed at where they left marks. She slowly removed the blindfold and gave you time to adjust to the light of the room. She sat there on the bed, as naked as you. “Make me cum now, baby.”

Previous Day ⛧ Next Day

[mellybouboulove]

My guardian angel🤍𓆩♡𓆪☁️

Chapter 1

Hey guys, this is my first fanfic :) I'm already working on the upcoming chapters, it's gonna be pretty long.

This is a Drug Dealer Ellie Williams X OFC fic, it's out of universe and takes place in college, it's set in the 2000s.

Chapter 2 , Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapitre 5, Chapter 6, Chapitre 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9

Tags: #wlw #sapphic #drugdealer!ellie #modern!ellie #tlou #slowburn #smut #fluff #tlouau #au #modernau

Here's the first chapter <3

First Chapter

It’s October 31st and I have yet to find my Halloween costume for the upcoming party. I was never too fond of parties but my friends have been begging me to join them. I started feeling guilty for not engaging more with the social part of uni, am l wasting my life ?

9pm: My whole wardrobe was covering the floor of my bedroom. I was contemplating each piece I had to find anything that could work as a costume when I started to question if I should even attend. After a couple minutes, I decided to put on a red top and red thighs topped with a blue dress in a desperate attempt to recreate Wendy Torrance’s look in The Shining. By the time I got ready, Emily and Jonathan were here to pick me up. I was already feeling so tired from all the noise. Maybe wasting my life is not that bad after all.

As we parked I could already hear everyone screaming like raging animals. When we entered the house Victoria, one of Emily’s soccer teammates, greeted us and took Emily and Jonathan apart. I felt out of place and decided to head towards the bar to grab a drink. Everyone around me was dancing and smoking. I struggled to breathe and looked around me, spotting the backdoor to the garden. I paved myself a way in the crowd; as I reached the outdoors. I sat and took a deep breath of fresh air watching the sky thinking about my bed.

I started relaxing when I noticed a presence in the corner of my eye. I turned around and saw a girl smoking a cigarette leaning against the wall. She glanced at me and we stayed in an awkward silence for a couple seconds until she finally started talking. 

- Hey, do you mind if I sit here? - Not at all, go ahead. 

As she sits next to me I take a better look at her, I can’t help but notice her attractiveness. She has a cute button nose and small freckles on her cheeks, light green eyes and strands of hair falling in her face. She’s really pretty. She looked up to me and I quickly looked away in embarrassment. She smiled at my reaction.

- What’s your name ? I don’t think we’ve met before. - My name’s Maya Reeves, you ? I asked. - Ellie Williams. What are you doing here all alone? 

- I just needed some fresh air, I lost my friends and the music is so loud. Her face enlightened, then she confessed to me that she didn’t like these parties either.

- What are you dressed as ? I continued.  - What? - It’s Halloween, are you not wearing a costume? - Ohh no no, I hate this kind of stuff.. Are you wearing a costume ?

I got up and turned around to show off my outfit. 

- Duh?! Do you think this is how I normally dress ?? l said.

She chuckled and looked at me up and down admitting something was off. She continued.

- What are you dressed as ? -Wendy Terrance from The Shining. -Ohh cool.. I didn’t see it but you look good. -What!! you really should see it! -I'll keep it in mind, I'll think about you when I do. 

She smiled at me, put out her cigarette in the ash and got up to leave. On her way back, she greeted Jonathan who was coming out of the house. He looked at me surprised. 

-Did you get drug?  -No why? I asked surprised.  -She only ever talks to her clients. -What are you talking about?  -She’s my plug, she’s at every party just to do business.  -Ohh.

I guess she must’ve only talked to me to try to sell me drugs, I’m kinda disappointed, she seemed sweet. Emily noticed how bored and sad I looked and offered me to drink to get in the mood. After a couple drinks I felt better and managed to enjoy the rest of the night. 

Eventually, it was time to go home. Emily and Jonathan were both way too drunk so I took the driver’s seat. The road was dark and my hands a little shaky, my eyes started to close until l suddenly saw two big lights coming right at us and heard loud noises. l realized we just collided with a car.

------------------- To Be Continued..

[the-broken-pen]

A sapphic detective who gets too close to the truth of a case and gets confronted by her girlfriend for being too obsessed?

“You need to stop.”

The detective didn’t jerk up at the sound of her voice—just quietly stirred, rustling papers as she shifted upright to meet her eyes.

“I didn’t hear you come in,” the detective said slowly, eyes scanning over her. She watched her gaze catch on the water dripping from the ends of her hair, the mascara smudging itself down her cheeks.

“It’s date night,” she said, and even to her own ears her voice sounded tired. Dead. Rotting roses and dirty dishes in the sink.

The detective blinked once, then shifted through her papers until she found a scribbled in calendar. It was stuck on the wrong month.

“I forgot,” the detective murmured. It wasn’t an apology, and neither of them were pretending that it was. She could tell, even now, with her girlfriend pathetic and dripping water onto the hardwood floor in front of her, that the detective wanted nothing more than to go back to her evidence.

“Yeah,” she croaked. “Funny how it’s never the case you forget.”

The detective jerked, slightly, like she hadn’t expected the barbs in her girlfriend’s voice.

In the hallway, there was a drooping bouquet of flowers she hadn’t been able to bear bringing into the apartment.

“You know how important this is,” the detective implored, and it made her want to break things. Burn the papers, shatter the fancy glasses in the cabinet, spill wine across the carpets.

What about me, she wanted to scream. Am I not important to you anymore?

Instead, she said again, “You need to stop.”

“Stop?”

“The case. You need to stop.”

“I can’t just stop,” the detective laughed slightly, as if she thought it would convey how inconceivable the idea of stopping was.

“Yes, you can. Give it to someone else. There’s a whole precinct just waiting for you to put this file into their hands.”

At the thought of it, the thought of giving up this case, the hunt, the chase, pain flashed across the detective’s face.

“You don’t understand.”

“I do,” she replied. She had to shift her gaze to the dead plant on the corner of her partner’s desk, dirt dry and leaves brittle. “How could I not?”

“So then how could you ask me to do that? To give it all up? Why now?”

She had so many answers to that. So many moments that cut into her hands like a mosaic of memories. The bed empty beside her through the entire night. Cancelled reservations, one seat alone at the dinner table, laughs that died in her ribs. Friends, well meaning, who asked where the detective was, and the painful smiles she forced through the explanations. Work, and work, and work. Crime scene photos on the coffee table. The loneliness that seemed to care about her more than her girlfriend did.

There were so many times when she almost said something. Almost said enough. But she hadn’t, and now they were here, as she dripped a puddle onto the floor, and the detective looked at her like she had never seen her before.

When she tried to say that, any of that, it caught in her throat.

The detective took her silence for an inability to answer. A lack of evidence. Like she was throwing this tantrum for no reason, a little kid in the toy aisle of the store.

The detective sighed, rubbing a hand over her forehead. The other was already fanning through the papers once more. Her voice turned into something that begged to be understood.

“I’m so close—“

“To losing me.” She swallowed, painfully. “You’re losing me.”

“That’s not fair.”

“This isn’t fair,” her voice broke as she gestured between the two of them. “What you’re doing to me isn’t fair.”

“I’m not doing anything—“

“Exactly.” It was louder than she meant it to be. They both flinched.

“I’ll have it solved in a week, I promise.” She wasn’t sure who the detective was promising to.

“No.”

The detective blinked.

“No?”

“You heard me the first time.”

“I heard you, but I’m not sure what you’re saying ‘no’ to.”

If she had the energy to be slightly meaner, she would have told her to figure it out. Told her that she was a detective, this should be easy for her.

“I’m not giving you a week.” She took a deep breath. “And you’re not going to solve it.”

The detective’s looked at her like she didn’t recognize the person on the other side of the desk.

Finally, she understood what it felt like to face her girlfriend from the other side of an interrogation table.

Her girlfriend’s face was cold, and closed off. Her jaw was grinding into itself. She was staring at her like she couldn’t decide whether or not to consider her a suspect. As if the only reason she could fathom her girlfriend saying something like that was if she was actively sabotaging her.

She was cold, and her coat was wet, and this place no longer felt like home.

“You won’t solve this case.”

She was pretty sure there wasn’t anything crueler she could have said.

“You don’t know anything.” It was dripping with venom, and fear, and frustration. The fear the detective really wouldn’t solve it. The frustration that it still wasn’t solved.

“Do you really think you’re that special?” By now, it was too far gone for her to stop. There was no pretty way out of this. “You aren’t. This isn’t a TV show. You aren’t the main character who swoops in where no one else has before. It’s been decades of the same bullshit—taunting and evidence trails, and nobody has solved it. Don’t you think if it was solvable, it would have been by now?”

“There’s new evidence, and I’m not them—“

“What part of ‘you aren’t special’ don’t you understand,” she hissed, and the detective shifted away from her. “You aren’t the miracle detective who solves this. They’re going to keep on killing, and driving the people who try and find them crazy, and you’re letting them do it to you.”

“I’m not letting them do anything.”

“But you are,” she countered. “You have been for months. They’re messing with you. They’re everything to you, and you’re a game to them, and I’m nothing on the sidelines.”

“Babe, that’s not true,” The detective tried, voice softening. As if she had just realized something between them was wrong. That her girlfriend was hurting—had been, for a while.

She swallowed the tears rising in her throat.

“Do I need to become a crime scene for you to finally care about me again?” She slammed her hand down on the papers. Pretended the wince on the detectives face was concern for her, and not the papers she crumpled. “Will you look at me, love me again, if I’m a bloody photograph in this folder?”

“I do love you.”

“When someone loves someone else, they don’t leave them alone in the rain, waiting to be picked up. They don’t cancel to go dig through old archives on their loved one’s birthday. They don’t leave them in the middle of the night and let the blankets beside them get cold. People who love someone don’t live their life without a concern for the person they’re putting below everything else.”

“You’re making this really hard.”

“Good,” she snapped. “Because you’ve been making it hard to love you for months, and I’m glad you finally know how it feels.”

The detective paused, at that. Swallowed, eyes flitting around the room as if she would find the perfect thing to say in the remnants of the life they had built together.

“I love you,” The detective managed. Somehow, it was the worst thing she could have said.

“Good. Prove it.” She thought maybe dying would have hurt less than this.

“Prove it?”

“Prove it. Me, or the case.”

The detective froze.

“You don’t mean that,” she said, and it sounded like a plea. Don’t make me choose.

“Look at me and try and tell me I’m joking.” When the detective said nothing, she pushed further. “Go on. Do it. Choose.”

“I can’t do that—“ the detective choked. “This isn’t fair, you know that. I’m so close.”

Somehow, she had expected it to hurt less.

“Don’t make me choose,” the detective, her girlfriend, the love of her life finally said, voice breaking.

She had thought it would feel like dying.

It felt like nothing.

“You just did,” she said. The tears refused to be held, this time. The pain ran rampant through every word.

She knew her girlfriend could hear it.

“I love you,” the detective whispered. A final, desperate prayer for her to stay. But she was no god, and her girlfriend was no believer. And it would never be enough.

She let the door slam on the way out.

The detective never did solve that case.

[marzipanandminutiae]

First off, your blog has increased my sympathy for Lucille's character, so congratulations, I hope you're proud. Though, to be fair, I was never in the EvilTM camp, more of the Batshit Crazy Because Of Massive Trauma viewpoint, which, you know, she was.

Anyways, my actual reason for the ask is about Eunice. I've never read any of the extra source material so I don't know if this is explained somewhere. But basically why Eunice McMichael?

The Sharpes presumably met the McMichaels while they were visiting Alan in London (perhaps his graduation?). There's no father in the picture, but otherwise, she doesn't seem to fulfill any of their criteria. She has family and is highly social (lots of people to notice and care if she went missing/died), she's young and desirable to have as a wife (there must've been some competition for her back home at least), she's not older or widowed (i.e. "undesirable"), and while she's clearly rich, she's not the sole inheritor of her family's estate (they'd be working solely with her dowry, a much lower figure).

It's heavily implied (/stated outright?) that Lucille is the one who chooses Thomas's brides. There's no logical reason to choose Eunice. But following with your "sapphic" take on Lucille, I think she just has a thing for Eunice.

A lot of words just to say that but what are your thoughts?

Welcome to the Lucille Appreciators Club! Meetings are Fridays at 7:30. I'll bring snacks.

So, this is such an interesting question. The bios don't shed much light but they do provide some on how the Bride Selection Process works

Namely, that it's far from an exact science.

Per the bios, Bluebearding has never been Plan A. Plan A is finding investors for the goo-mining business. Marriage + Murder is the fallback option- that they keep having to fall back on. They've never actually chosen a bride on purpose before Enola, exactly- Margaret developed a passion for Thomas on her own; Pamela's dying father begged Thomas to marry his disabled daughter so she'd be cared for. Enola seems to have been the first one who didn't just fall into their laps, so to speak

And Thomas picked her.

So no, it's not always Lucille's choice- she encouraged him to go along with Mr. Upton's notion and propose to Pamela, the first time, but how much she was involved with the inception of the other marriages is up for debate. Which makes me think Thomas picked Eunice- I can't imagine such a fluttery little social climber being other than annoying to Lucille.

Why EITHER of them thought she was a good idea when she had so many friends and family to miss her...well, the Sharpes aren't very good at crime, frankly. Enola still has relatives writing to her five years later, so I suspect they would have come looking for her eventually. The snare seems to have been tightening around Thomas and Lucille for a while now, without them knowing it.

I do imagine that Edith's superior "qualifications" made a key lynchpin of Thomas' argument to convince Lucille to switch targets, though. And an interesting Word of Actor tidbit: Jessica Chastain thinks Lucille's desire to protect Edith by leaving her alone, at first, was genuine. Because she loves delicate, beautiful things, and saw Edith that way.

[booksandpaperss]

TEEHEE IM BACK TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF MY PRIVILEGES. can i have death loop snippet pls for me🙏 and dapples convo i need it desperately. AND ALSO. anything ANYTHING from any of ur original works. crawling across the floor like PLEASEEE ELLI OC INFO.....

so happy to see you accessing the wife privileges 🙏 ask and you shall receive ❤️❤️

death loop snippet from the start of chapter 3:

Chuuya still remembers the vivid, searing press of Dazai’s lips against his, etched into the very groves of his memory. In a way he knew he’d never be able to forget from the moment he’d recklessly thrown himself across the line. It had been Dazai’s birthday, but in the singular moment of lips on his it was Chuuya that felt the glorious thrill of free-fall. But you can’t have a fall without gravity. Just a few months later, Sakunosuke Oda was killed, Dazai left, and Chuuya hit the ground. Hard. 

aka chuuya reminiscing about his and dazai’s one and only kiss bc he’s a LOSER

for dapples convo:

since you’ve been begging me for this one for a hot second I shall graciously give you a snippet and the summary 🫶🫶

sum:

Chuuya and Dazai get an opportunity to really talk for the first time in years, and for the first time, they take it. A moment alone amidst the chaos.

and the snippet:

“I get it now. Why you had to leave, I mean.”  There must’ve been something in Chuuya’s tone, because suddenly it’s like Dazai sees him in a completely different light. His expression is far, far more open than Chuuya is used to, though still barely a movement for the average person. He can see Dazai’s mind racing, calculating possibilities and outcomes and just once, Chuuya wishes he would simply stop and feel.  Eventually, Dazai says slowly, carefully, “I… honestly didn’t think you would care.” 

this was actually the only part I have written so far that I could share here bc this gets… distinctly hornier later. I have literally no excuses for myself

okay and for the original:

since I’ve already yapped to u abt everlasting quite a bit I’ll tell u a little bit abt love me like a poet loved too late <3 it’s basically this idea I had for a sapphic romance book! and I will dm this one to u bc I am rather cagey abt my original ideas SORRY anyone else who is reading this but discord mutuals if ur rlly curious u can always msg me abt it ofc

[huellitaa]

bee's record player, june edition 🎀𓂃 ࣪˖

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 INTRO

and to go hand in hand with the may edition and a consolation for how late said may edition of bee's record player was, i present to you bee's record player, june edition! now this month has a LOT in terms of music so i won't stall any further; here is the VERY EARLY edition of bee's record player, june edition! <3 happy pride month lovelies! ♡

──★ ˙ ̟🎀NEW ARRIVALS

give me that, wayv

♡ released 3rd june, 2024

♡ extended play / EP

♡ best songs: not yet listened! ♡

♡ running time: 18 minutes 16 seconds

baby blue movie, cigarettes after sex

♡ released 4th june, 2024

♡ single

♡ running time: 4 minutes 5 seconds

coming home, beabadoobee

♡ released 5th june, 2024

♡ pre-release single

♡ running time: 2 minutes 16 seconds

please please please, sabrina carpenter

♡ released 6th june, 2024

♡ pre-release single

♡ running time: 6 minutes 1 second

na, nayeon

♡ released 14th june, 2024

♡ extended play / EP

♡ best songs: butterflies, heaven, magic

♡ running time: 22 minutes 29 seconds

never be yours, kali uchis

♡ released 21st june, 2024

♡ single

♡ running time: 3 minutes 16 seconds

supernatural, newjeans

♡ released 21st june, 2024

♡ single

♡ running time: 11 minutes 42 seconds

──★ ˙ ̟🎀BEE'S TRACKS: TOP 10

♡ 10. ultraviolence, lana del rey

never gets old honestly. lana ilysm my baby this song is my everything i actually cannot do this. if i die and dont come back to sing "yo soy la princesa " and the whole bridge yall know im dead sorry ab that 💔

♡ 9. complicated, avril lavigne

ONCE AGAIN. ABSOLUTE BANGER. CLASSIC. I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH AND IT'S SO RELATABLE RIGHT NOW TOO AVRIL ILY ILY ILY

♡ 8. my kink is karma, chappell roan

also very relatable right now,,, feeling like this ab several very specific people in or out of my life right now and it's so ridiculously accurate and such a banger and her voice is SO RIDICULOUSLY SATISFYING BRO EUUUHHHHSUEUJJJNNNNFFFFUUUEUU

♡ 7. i'll see you there tomorrow, tomorrow x together

YESSS THIS SOBG IS SO BACK WE'RE SO BACK ISYTT STANS RISE. THIS SONG IS SUMMER IDC. ITS JUST. OH KY GOSH. I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY I LJJJDJJUUEEUUHHHHH (translation: very good song! 🫶���💖)

♡ 6. gee, girls' generation

GEE GEE GEE GEE BABABAYAY GEE GEE EGEE GEE BABSBABAB this song is the EPITOME of 2000's girly girl kpop. it makes me feel SO girly and i ADORE girls generation. they're just silly girls making silly songs in the silly 2000's i adore them

♡ 5. naked in manhattan, chappell roan

OH MY GOSH. THIS IS MY FAVOURITE SONG EVER ATM U DONT GET IT. listening to this in a sapphic situationship hits different u guys don't get it. naked in manhattan is my religion . the lana and the mean girls ref make me foam at the mouth

♡ 4. femininomenon, chappell roan

HIT IT LIKE ROMPOMDPUM GET IT HOT LIKE PAOA JOHN MAKE A BITCH GO ON AND ON ITS A FEMININOKEMENON. woahhh chappell again are we surprised? no. my excuse is it's pride month fuck off leave me and my cunty lesbian pop alone. ANYWAY THIS SONG IS FOR THE CUNTY LESBIANS AND THE SEXY MANHATER GIRLS GO QUEENS WE LOVE YOUU

♡ 3. please please please, sabrina carpenter

HEARYBREAK IS KNE THING. MY EGOS ANOYHER. I BEG YOU DONT EMABRASS ME MOTHERFUCKER. the vibes this song has are immaculate and once again absolutely devoured the vocals and the retro style music is EVERYTHING brina PLEASE more of this !!! ♡ unpopular opinion espresso was TOP TIER GODLY HEAVENLY PERFECT but i enjoy this ever so sligjtly more. BITH ARE SO GOOD THOGH I CNAT

♡ 2. coming home, beabadoobee

comfort song. this song feels like coming home. it feels like being in disneyland or being at the top of a tower in the evening with the lamplights glowing and the streets bustling and the music playing and just taking a breath of fresh air and realising you're alive thank you for this beautiful masterpiece i'll never get over this bea. i might cry seeing this live honestly

♡ 1. good luck, babe!, chappell roan

this song saved my life watered my crops fed my children impregnated my children made me fall in love with the world again her vocals feel like i'm ascending to heaven i feel like i'm on shrooms i chappell roan i chap

──★ ˙ ̟🎀ALBUMS

♡ 1. rise and fall of a midwest princess, chappell roan

anddd second month strong, chappell stays on top!!!!!! somehow i've become even more obsessed with her than i was last month but we are not gonna talk ab it. it's pride month don't ask me !!!!!!!!!!!!

♡ 2. the name chapter: freefall, tomorrow x together

gone back to freefall lately because i can't believe we're out of freefall era and i miss it so bad. i love tomorrow so so so so so so much but i miss freefall too (+ growing pains is my everything esp bc of the concert videos that i'd kill a man to see live 💔 KAI KAMAL HUENING. I NEED YOU.)

♡ 3. ultraviolence, lana del rey

in honour of both my crippling summer depressive episode and mother's birthday on the 21st ultraviolence is back up at the top again! the glow up before and after listening to ultraviolence is insane idgaf

♡ 4. our extended play, beabadoobee

SHOOPDOOBDOODOABAODOO SHOOPSODOBADODOD OH YEAH SHOOP im so ridiculously excited 2 see this live

♡ 5. beatopia, beabadoobee

once again in honour of the bea concert in november we beatopia still remaining here which is quite a feat actually considering how much i listen to music GO BEA WOOO

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 ARTISTS

♡ CHAPPELL ROAN (it's pride month.)

♡ TOMORROW X TOGETHER (again. it's pride month.)

♡ SABRINA CARPENTER

♡ NEWJEANS

♡ LANA DEL REY (just barely overtook bea!)

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 SPECIAL MENTIONS

along with the announcement of "this is how tomorrow moves" by our lovely lovely girl beabadoobee, the pop princess, the it girl of western music, sabrina carpenter will be making a return with her new album "short 'n sweet" on the 23rd of august, 2024! ♡

a beyond happy birthday to our mother lana, raising girlbloggers since btd era and onwards ♡ we love you lana ♡

tour dates of both brina and bea have been released this month AND THE BEST PART... ME AND MY BEST FRIEND ARE GOING TO A BEA CONCERT IN NOVEMBER 🫶🏻💘💖 I'M BEYOND EXCITED IT WAS LITERALLY JUST LAST ISSUE I WAS TALKING AB HOW MUCH I WANTED TO SEE HER LIVE I CANT DO TJIS AJDHFIAKTJSKF

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 EDITOR'S NOTE

once again, thank you ever so much for reading this issue of bee's record player: june edition! i really really enjoy writing these and getting the chance to yap ab all my silly little music obsessions to you all. i've made some of my closest friends on here and i treasure you all, love u guys <3

all my love! 💘💬🎀

[melissaschemmentisglasses]

I have so so so many thoughts about this episode. They will all be unorganized bc I have ✨ADHD✨ and also because I will rewatch this episode tomorrow at least 3 times.

Let’s start with me being vulnerable for a second here:

I am in PAIN because I can’t shake the line “I love my mom but you know that’s my mom”. Janine is not as naïve as people paint her to be at times, she know the kind of person that Vanetta is and how selfish she is, deep down Janine probably deals with the conflict of how hard it is to love someone that only loves you conditionally, when it benefits them. This leads me to see how breaking up with Tariq was actually such an important step towards her growth as a person.

Barbara smiling at being called “Work Mom” will never leave my mind. Don’t ask me why I’m making this such a big thing just know that it is a big thing for me. Barbara fell into the mom role for Janine in such an organic way that seeing her celebrate Janine when she announces that she will go on vacation made me grin like an idiot and seeing her defend her like she’s her own kin made me wish she really squared up at that moment because you know that Barbara Howard has been a teacher long enough to see her fair share of narcissistic parents.

Now I’ll be stupid 😌 :

I AM BEGGING FOR MELISSA TO BE MADE CANONICALLY BISEXUAL. SHE’S FRUIT PUNCH OKAY? THE CLOSET IS GLASS WITH HER.

“She smell of citrus and spice” Melissa bby that’s gay

Ava being intimidated by Vanetta was lowkey gay. Mean Femme x Mean Femme might be my new fave trope

Melissa and Jacob might share a single brain cell when alone. It’s always “dumb bitch” hour with them.

The queen of hearts is the card of the sapphics. I will not elaborate.

[hypnolurker]

“Straight”-Jacket Stephanie

ORIGINAL IMAGE FOUND HERE

Stephanie struggled against her bindings, wriggling and grunting as she fought to free herself from the straight jacket to no avail. It was futile, she was completely bound here like this. Two women leaned over her and gazed with lust-filled stares down at her creepily.

It had been weeks since they caught her. It was hard to explain what happened, it was like one day she woke up and the world has changed. When she went out there were only women, not a single man. No sign of her boyfriend or any of the men she knew. She got stopped on the street as a strange woman asked if she wanted to have some fun. When Stephanie had responded with disgust telling her she was straight the woman had a bewildered look in her eyes as if Stephanie had just told her she was from Mars.

Just as Stephanie was starting to get freaked out by the weird world she found herself in she was being dragged away by women. Sedated and kidnapped. Soon she was at this facility, it was like a mental hospital or something except the staff were entirely young women and the uniform was, as far as she could tell, their birthday suit. The place was filled entirely by naked women and Stephanie was freaking out as they strapped her down and started talking to her.

They asked her a series of sexual questions and seemed stunned by her every response. Everything was met with ridiculous reactions like ‘You don’t eat pussy? Not even a nibble?’ or 'you’ve never had sex with a woman! That’s horrible!’ It really disturbed her how genuinely shocked they seemed. That was just the beginning though.

It wasn’t long before they diagnosed her and began her 'treatment’ by injecting her with some kind of drug and then constantly tormenting her. They would whisper into her ear. The same words and phrases over and over. I love licking pussy. Horny. Wet. Lesbian. Slut. Over and over until she couldn’t shut their voices out. They caressed her body through the straight jacket and pressed their lips to her face in sloppy sensual kisses until she was begging them to leave her alone.

Every passing day she felt something inside her changing. At first she was scared and disgusted but slowly she grew to crave it, all of it. Heir soft, smooth bodies, their breath on her ear…she wanted to grope and squeeze and rub those breasts, tease the delicate nipples until they were stiff and hard. She wanted to taste the wet folds of their sex. No not just taste, lose herself in their tight pink pussies as she worked her inexperienced tongue into every crevice and learned how they reacted, how to please them, how to make them shake and moan and twitch and jerk their hips until they soaked her face in delicious cum.

How had she gotten so messed up? She knew she was straight before. She knew she had a boyfriend but she couldn’t really remember…well anything about him. Conversely images of her captors’ breasts bouncing and their pussies leaking as they put on perverted shows of sapphic pleasure that warped her mind and twisted her desires, images like that were stuck in her mind. She found herself drooling when she saw them staff enter, thrusting her hips wildly in desperation as they teased her through her bonds. Her pussy leaking out juices constantly as she was gradually swallowed up by the intense lesbian brainwashing.

“So do you still think you’re…what did you call it, straight?” One nurse asked, her voice was velvety and seductive making Stephanie shiver as she tried her best to remember how she felt. It seemed so hazy now when she first came here. She had seen so much sex since then. So many wet slits grinding against each other. Her own pussy spasmed excitedly as she thought about it. Why had she been so repulsed back then? It seemed so silly now. It would be much more enjoyable if she said she was a lesbian and stopped fighting it. She was already so needy and drenched and the world she came from seemed like a dream to her now, a boring dream.

“I want to run my tongue up your thigh until you grab me by the hair and straddle my face, then I want to make you buck and moan and squirt all over my face.” Stephanie responded in her most seductive voice.

“I’ll take that as a no.” The nurse replied, satisfied that her patient was now cured and eager to fuck her brains out as she undid the restraints.

[fighting-these-demons]

So I couldn't blog a few episodes but now!!!

TOUDOU!!!! He's definitely racing to see Makishima!!!

ONODA'S HEART RACING!!!!!

Toudou and Onoda racing together to meet Makishima!!!! 😭😭😭💖💖💖

BOTH OF THEM CRYING!!!! 😭😭😭

Toudou hasn't considered that Makishima wanted to see him alone lmao! 😂

SHOUJO SPARKLE SOUND EFFECT!!!! Onoda is so in love with him it's crazy!

"I could search the whole world over.... but you're the only one I'd find who rides with that form!"

That was SO CLOSE to what your heart really wants to say Onoda. SO CLOSE!!!

Lmao Makishima wanted a minute alone with Toudou! 😂 Poor guy!

Aw! Onoda is realizing that there might be something going in there! Subconsciously... deeply subconsciously.... but he senses it!

WHSUSJDNDJDH

ONODA NOOOOOOO 😭 Don't third wheel them!!! He already told you he was leaving you behind for their race!

I'm glad he's putting in a bit of a fight in his own way but like.... maybe now is not the best time? He wasn't invited.... Love how he's still so polite and sweet and begging while stubbornly holding onto his feelings! It fits him.

His heart can't help from trying to throw his body in the way when someone might be confessing to Makishima. 💓

Toudou is so patient with him! What a good Rival Senpai! 💖 I can't help but think that PART of it is him feeling secure in letting Onoda watch as he confesses though.

MAKISHIMA YOU IDIOT THOSE ARE EXACTLY THE WORDS TOUDOU WANTS TO HEAR!!!!!! 😫😭

He's still terminally allergic to Sincerity.

Yes Toudou. Deflect to how many letters Onoda sent that surely went unanswered as well. Lmao. Geez.

Real Inuyasha Kagome moment for sure.

The Time Honored Sports Anime Tradition of

Screaming Your Rival's Name During Competition Because They Can't Show You Screaming It In Bed.

Throwing sweat as a blown kiss and nearly grabbing hands with it and looking into each ithers eyes while doing it AUGH

Toudou if you don't buy a fucking plane ticket after this!!!!!!

What is this urge in your heart? Geez idk Onoda. Idk if you'll ever connect it.

---Literally transition could save her. I think her feelings would magically slot into place mentally and she'd realize how in love she is with everyone but I've gotten off track.---

Lord I hope his teammates rip into him for RACING ALL NIGHT WHEN HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN RESTING 😤

Jesus!!!!! I know he's in love but he's racing for his team! Nit just for Makishima!!!

Then again this is him maybe coming to terms with romantic feelings possibly so I guess it's a "let it slide" situation.... but still...

AUGH THE HUG!!!!!!! 😫😫😫😭😭😭 had they been alone that absolutely would have been a kiss!

Let's hope that the mark it left in your heart helps you to think things through Onoda!

Damn Toudou you're really gonna let Onoda gush and spill his feelings like that in front of you? Then again he knows on some level that Onoda still hasn't put a name to his feelings so he probably feels uncomfortable but not scared that he's gonna lose right then and there.

Lmao Toudous smug look at Makishima not caring a bit about Onoda's anime rambling! 😂

Well. Here comes the Canon Manamonoda.

PFFFFFFT OK Toudou DID get insecure when Makishima told Onida he was starting to look like a Second Year and had to jump in to reestablish the pecking order!!! 🤣

I know they're trying to frame the girls as after Onoda's heart but I ship them! They're so cute! 💖💖💖

I wish there was more Girl's Sports anime! 🥺 Surely the industry environment has grown enough to allow it now! They wouldn't even have to do the heartbreaking show ruining No Homo in the Last Episode or with a Whole No Homo Second Season! They could just give us the Sapphic overtones and then deliver on it!

[maddybutterfly]

My 2023 made me want to die over and over and over and over and over. And I almost did.

My 2023 reinstalled my trauma responses through family and through an ex who showed me all of the reasons I have to not trust people and to dislike myself were not only valid, but that they were actively being used to hurt me.

My 2023 made me promise to never date another person again, and I am avoiding the sapphic community like the plague it is. Wlw, more like whw because I have never met so many girls who fucking hate girls, who use girls, who fuck over other girls, who knowingly drag down other girls, who cheat and lie and manipulate and play to and with other girls before.

My 2023 reverted my life back to 2019-2020.

My 2023 gave me disappointment after disappointment and it didn't stop even once.

My 2023 had me dependent on alcohol, dependent on weed, dependent on someone who lied about loving me for at least 8 months (though I know it's longer and I'm sure I was cheated on as well but I have no picture proof because I didn't scroll through their phone in the night like I should've.)

My 2023 showed me that sometimes people want you unhealthy because then at least they don't have to deal with you, because if you're drunk enough you won't notice them talking to someone else over discord.

My 2023 has shown me how little people care for other people in general as long as they get what they want.

My 2023 has made me into a pessimist if I wasn't one already and you know what?

My 2023 has given me every reason to become the worst person, the version of the worst person, I could conjure. And I did.

But then.

I got a job by myself that I actually show up to.

I got meds by myself because I never got help even when I begged for it.

I got back into television I enjoy and books I like reading.

I learned to be alone and to feel alone and to be okay with that while also learning to detach from someone so quickly it felt like ripping off my own hands. But at least I don't jump from person to person because I'm too afraid to be alone, so I create hollow and malformed connections that die out around year 3 that I keep in my life until I know I have a new secure position to be in once I'm bored of my relationship I built and broke and don't want to put back together.

I got true understanding that some people are actually bad people, they're just really good at convincing themselves and others that they're not. That I had the capacity to be a bad person and for a while I chose to.

I got to become a good one again.

I got to see what I was and I condemned her.

I got to find out who my true friends are.

I got to find out who actually cares.

I got to leave this year all alone. No one by my side. And in that I got the truth.

2023 gave me the stark understanding that I am me and everything outside of that is temporary. To love things and experiences and people but to not try to keep them. That life is bittersweet all rolled up and shoved down your throat if you like it or not. That nothing will ever stay, and so you have nothing ever to lose.

2024 will hopefully teach me that middle ground. The loving but not attaching. The constant anguish that comes with choosing to want. And how to dampen the burning.

2024 will be me. Only me. Doing what I want. When I want. If I want. And I will never be the version of me who needs anyone else again. I will never become someone others have to care for again. I won't be their debt. They won't hold it over my head like you did.

2024 will be me rebuilding all of the good I gave up for them, for everyone.

2024 will give not one person access to me. And the rest of my life will be the same.

This year was one of the worst years of my life. I'm back where I fucking started. And maybe that's for the fucking best. Just restart like you never existed, you might as well not have. This version of me doesn't get hurt. She doesn't have anything to take from her. And it will stay that way. Forever.

2024, give me peace and solitude. And give them everything. I want them to have everything they've ever wanted. And then, I will watch as they cycle through losing it all over and over because they don't truly love anything but themselves and never have and never will because they are an unfeeling monster with no real capacity for love or connection if it doesn't serve them.

I'm excited to live the rest of my life alone by choice. And I'm excited to see everyone else's fall to pieces in the same way, by choice.

Fuck 2023. Fuck you. Fuck them. And I fucking swear 2024. Treat me well or I opt out so fast you won't even have time to beg me to stay like they did.

I'm done, 2023. All done.

[unlimitedpastabilities]

Wake Up

—————————————

Sapphic Fluff, Probably NSFW, ReaderXCrush, Reader’s POV, pg 13

Summary: a sapphic story based off of a song. I definitely went in a direction that wasn’t intended in the song, but I like it so enjoy

warning for implied sex

IM POSTING AGAIN AFTER LIKE TWO YEARS! this was surprisingly in my drafts but it’s really good so enjoy

———————————————

Finally. We were alone. The others would be back soon but for now for the first time I could talk to her. Try to get her to see. I took my chance while I could. I turned to her, months of my unsaid words boiled up inside of me.

“It feels like you’ve been in a coma.”

She raised her eyebrows.

“I’m sorry?”

“You always talk about how no one is out there for you, and how you wish you could find someone.”

She looked slightly confused, but I kept going.

“I’ve been here all this time. I know you’re scared, and I know you’ve been hurt before. But you have to open up your eyes.” I took a deep breath to calm down. I wasn’t trying to come off so harsh, I mean at this point I was almost begging, but honestly that’s how I felt.

“I don’t understa-“ she started.

“I’ve never stopped being someone who could love you well, and I’ve tried to show you the easy way, but that obviously hasn’t worked, I mean, that’s why we’re here now.” I was speaking more softly now.

She began to have a knowing look on her face, that was almost guilty. I didn’t want her to feel guilty so I just took her face one of my hands. She was surprised, but she didn’t move away at all.

I was surprised too, it was my first instinct and I just acted on it. I decided to just go with it, if it wasn’t making her upset.

“Will you please wake up your sleeping heart? I know that sometimes you’re afraid. But no more playing safe,” I said. Our faces had gotten considerably closer, I was thinking about how if I just leaned down a little I could...

“Okay.”

The response caused me to double take. Did she just—

“I’m sick of playing safe,” she explained with a small grin.

And she did it. She leaned up and just kissed me. It was magnificent, and sweet, and light, and over too soon. She pulled away with a smirk, while my jaw was dropped, head spinning. I tried to wait for my head to level before kissing her again, but it never did, and she giggled. At that I smiled and leant down again. She smiled into the kiss and put my face between her hands.

She pressed our bodies together and I wrapped my arms around her waist. She teased my lower lip with her tongue. I leaned forward even more so she had to slightly arch her back and my arms were the only thing keeping her from falling backward.

Suddenly we heard footsteps from down the hall and she pulled away panicked, but grinning. She grabbed onto my hand and starting running. I laughed, jogging behind her.

“Aren’t we supposed to be helping them?” I laughed.

“Not after that kiss!” She called right back.

We found an empty dead end in a hallway and stopped. The lights were off, which gave us hope that no one would come to bother us this time. She looked at me.

“I forgot how much I love living like this,” she breathed, looking slightly dazed.

I walked closer.

“Like what?” I asked.

“On the edge,” she laughed, “spontaneously, worry free, I guess.”

“Yeah,” I said, getting even closer, “I love it too.”

I took her by the waist and pulled her to me again. She smirked against my lips, it made my heart jump. She let her hands wander from my hair to my back, causing me to accidentally tighten my grip on her waist. She gasped, I loosened and mumbled a quick apology.

“No,” she said breathily. She pulled away for one quick second to pull my head further down and bring her mouth close to my ear. “I liked it,” she whispered.

I shuddered, a little surprised but incredibly delighted. I immediately latched my mouth onto her neck, not even worried about leaving a mark. Soon she took hold of my jaw and reconnected our lips. She weakened me with a graze of her teeth on my mouth and took the chance to back me against the wall. I was barely able to suppress the moan that wanted to escape my throat. She pushed our bodies impossibly closer, and ran her fingers up my thigh and hip with a featherlight touch.

At that point I was relying on the brick behind me for support more than my own legs, which could be trusted no longer. She let up on the pressure slightly and lightly traced my jaw before wrapping her arms around my neck. I took the opportunity to switch our positions, turning around so her back was pushed against the wall, she smirked against my mouth once more, which almost made me lose track of what I was doing. I hated how much I loved when she did that.

I quickly regained desire and ran my hand down her side, all the way to her hip. Her breath hitched and this time I was the one to smirk. I reached behind with both of my hands and pulled her legs up around me. She was breathing heavily, and I wasn’t sure if it was because she was out of breath or something else...

Her legs were wrapped around me, so finally her head was at my height. I was able to let her breathe and kiss along her jaw to behind her ear. I sucked at the skin behind it which elicited a moan from her, and caused her fingernails to dig slightly into my scalp. I smiled and moved down to her collarbone which made her moan once again and tighten the grip of her legs around my waist.

After a moment she grabbed my cheek and crashed our lips together. She had her other arm wrapped around my neck, pressing her fingers into my skin while shamelessly slipping her tongue into my mouth. I pressed my body impossibly closer to hers smashing her hips in between mine and the wall. She impulsively rolled her hips against mine, causing her to moan significantly louder than before. I captured her lips in mine once more to try and silence her but only succeeded in discovering the wonderful feeling of the vibration of her sound against my lips.

I let her legs down and slowed the movement of my lips. We were almost at the point of no recovery, and I couldn’t forget where we were. She opened her eyes after I pulled away, hair messy and lips red. Her eyes were starstruck, matching her grin. It was adorable.

“Holy shit,” Was all she seemed to be able to say.

“Come on,” I laughed, taking her by the hand. I led her out, took her back to my apartment, and I’m sure you can imagine the rest.

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(If you liked this you can check out my Masterlist, and feel free to leave a suggestion for a song I can write into a story!)

[enderslut]

im done begging the queer community to see transmascs as people. im just gonna get on with my shit and let everyone else get on with theirs, if you don't have solidarity with me then whatever, i don't need it anyway, im on earth for a finite amount of time and i will spend that how i want, even if that means dating/marrying a cute girl and taking her off the market for the sapphics who deserve her more or whatever. im just trying to enjoy my life, leave me the FUCK alone 

[writemekpop]

Panties | Jennie Kim

Pairing: Jennie Kim x Reader

Summary: You forget a very intimate anniversary, and your girlfriend Jennie is upset...

Genre: Sapphic, Girlfriend!Jennie

Word Count: 0.5k

“You’re home late,” Jennie said coldly, as you walked into your apartment. High spots of blush burned in her cheeks, begging for your lips.

“I know. I’m sorry, babe.” You sighed and dumped your bag on the counter. “My boss was being an ass, as usual.”

You pulled your hair out of its tight ponytail and slumped down next to your girlfriend, who was sitting on the rug. She was in just a baggy T shirt, and her long legs stretched out in all their tanned, kissable glory.

You leant in to give Jennie a kiss, but she swerved her head away at the last minute. You frowned.

“Could I get some of that?” You asked, gesturing to the open tub of ice cream that was nestled between her bare thighs.

“No,” Jennie said, snatching the spoon and placing the tub out of your reach. “It’s mine.”

You huffed. “Jen, why are you being so weird tonight?”

Jennie shot you her meanest glare. “You really don’t remember? It’s our anniversary!”

“What?” You said, gawking. “No it’s not. Our anniversary was two months ago! Remember, we went to that hotel and made out in the infinity pool.”

Jennie rolled her big, beautiful eyes, and your heart stuttered. “I didn’t mean that anniversary.”

“Huh?” You were utterly confused.

Jennie stroked your arm. "You know, the anniversary of the first time we..." she raised her eyebrow meaningfully, "did it?"

Your mouth dropped open. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Jennie said. “I’ve been sitting here, waiting for you for a century. I even got new lingerie. I’m wearing it under this T shirt. It’s green. And lace.”

You gulped. Images of Jennie’s naked body flashed through your mind: pulse thrumming in delicate wrists, swathes of ebony hair, the soft swell of stomach... “Green is my favourite colour.”

Jennie smirked. “I know.”

You reached forwards and stroked her soft straight hair. “I’m sorry. Let me make it up to you?”

Jennie scrunched up her nose. “No,” she said, standing up. “I’m tired. I’m going to bed.”

Without saying another word, she stalked off, leaving you all alone on the kitchen floor, heart racing like a fool. You stayed on the floor, too exhausted to move.

After a few minutes, you heard Jennie calling from the bedroom. “Y/n, get your butt in here!”

You heaved yourself up. When you walked inside your bedroom, you gasped.

Jennie was sprawled out elegantly on the bed, in a dark green lace bralette with matching panties. She’d put on deep red lipstick, making her lips look even more delicious. The sweet scent of her perfume - blackberries and bergamot - hung in the air.

Jennie smirked at your awe-struck expression. “You really believed that “I’m tired” bullshit? Now get your ass in bed, darling. We’ve got an anniversary to celebrate.”

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MASTERLIST

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