#konan x you

[obitos-whore]

🪽 Konan headcanon list 🪽

The Ame-orphans as your adopted children headcanons

The Akatsuki members as your boyfriend/girlfriend

Naruto characters as your older sibling (coming soon)

[cosmic-glow]

Request: "May I request soft akatsuki headcannons for a reader who loves to bake and cook? It's a passion of mine, and a great stress reliever! There's nothing I won't try and try to make!"

Notes: First of all, I'm sorry it took me so long to respond 😭 I also like cooking and I completely agree with you! I hope you like what I wrote, good reading!

"Are you hungry, love?"- Akatsuki

Warnings: no pronouns; no use of "y/n"; pure cuteness. Gender: Soft Headcanons. Characters: Itachi; Kisame; Deidara; Sasori; Kakuzu; Hidan; Zetsu; Tobi/Obito; Pein; Konan.

Itachi Uchiha

He always offers you help in the kitchen.

He is very picky when cooking for someone but is easily satisfied with whatever you cook for him.

He feels obligated to return the favor by cooking for you too. That's why he took charge of breakfast, always waking up before you to prepare what you like.

Likes hot foods and pasta. Loves handmade sweets.

He prefers traditional foods, but accepts trying new flavors when he's with you.

He loves going out to buy new ingredients with you, he knows a lot about the subject and would be of great help.

Kisame Hoshigaki

You know that popular saying that the best way to conquer a man is through his stomach? It applies very well to this man.

He likes to be spoiled with food and will be grateful for it so.. please cook for him.

His heart feels warm when he comes home and smells something delicious you are preparing.

He likes foods with a sweet and sour taste, and he loves meat. He also loves sweets, so it's not hard to please Kisame.

He loves trying new flavors with you. If you want, he'll even help you in the kitchen, but he's not very good (he's a bit clumsy).

He'll find a way to say thank you, whether it's washing the dishes, giving gifts, taking you out to eat, all of the above, whatever you prefer.

He's the kind of guy who would eat what you prepared even if it was completely burnt if he knew you put effort into it.

Deidara

He likes fast food, but is very happy when you cook for him.

Thanks to you, he's starting to eat more healthily, because he has a childish palate and is very resistant to exploring new flavors.

He likes spicy foods because are like an explosion in the mouth.

"I have to say, honey, your cooking is an art!" - he says with his mouth full when he really likes it.

One of his favorite moments of the day is when you're eating something you've prepared or he's bought, watching a movie and talking about anything.

It's something very simple, but if you make a cake just for him on his birthday, he'll feel so loved that he might even cry a little.

(Sometimes he brags to the other members about having such a skilled s/o in the kitchen).

But please keep this boy the hell away from the kitchen! When I say he's a complete chaos cooking, it's because the kitchen almost always explodes! Literally!

Sasori

He often forgets that he still needs to eat due to his puppet body, so he's grateful that you remind him. He still needs to eat a little every now and then to ensure a bit of vital energy or something.

And yes, that was the lie he invented to not disappoint you. And regardless of whether you believed it or not, he always eats your food, even though he knows how much work it will take to clean his insides afterwards (don't worry, he'll probably come up with something to solve this).

Understand, he lied because he knows how important cooking is to you, he sees how much you work at it, but had the misfortune of being with a guy who doesn't need to eat… but he couldn't risk hurting you for something that's his fault.

Sasori only eats your food and no one else's, no matter how much they insist.

He likes foods with strong spices, he no longer feels flavors in the same way as when he was a human.

At the end of every meal, he politely thanks you for the delicious food and offers to help with the dishes.

Kakuzu

He likes hot, very hot, and traditional foods. Doesn't like sweets.

He's great in the kitchen and sometimes cooks for you too, as a thank you. Kakuzu has many years of experience in the kitchen, take the opportunity to ask questions and get some tips, he may not show it but he really likes to help you.

Maybe you don't know, but Kakuzu practically never eats out, he knows that some people want him dead and could easily poison his food. So for him to eat everything you prepare without hesitation is really a great show of trust.

He is very silent while eating, but he doesn't mind if you want to talk about your day, he will be listening to every part.

He really appreciates your food, getting involved and asking about the spices you used, how you prepared it, he really likes it when you test a new recipe.

Always at the end of every meal he thanks you for the food and gets up before you to clear the table and wash the dishes, a silent way of thanking you.

Hidan

Spicy and crunchy foods and sour desserts, it's true heaven for him...

As incredible as it may seem, Hidan is very picky about his food, it's unbearable to go out to eat with him, it seems like he always makes a point of finding some flaw.

But it's the total opposite with you, he eats everything you prepare without complaining too much, just teasing you a little as always. Except if he is angry with you for some reason, then he will be impossible, no matter what you prepared, he will not eat it.

Hidan has a very annoying childhood palate, so don't force him to eat something he doesn't really like, like vegetables for example.

You'll probably have some arguments about him drink any kind of blood but not wanting to eat the soup you made (for example), but it won't change anything.

Whenever you enter the kitchen, Hidan follows right behind to find out what you're going to prepare and also because he loves to annoy you while you're cooking. He tickles you, bites you, hugs you, kisses you and even steals some utensils to disturb you before you kick him out of the kitchen.

Zetsu

He likes meat a lot, in fact you thought it was the only thing he could eat.

He is very impatient and even hugs you trying to convince you to let him eat before you finish.

"I don't care that it's not ready yet and it's raw, I'm hungry, love. Let me eat it just the way it is."

Not a very good critic of your recipes, he will eat literally anything you put in front of him and thank you for it.

You are the one who teaches him to have a more refined palate and he loves trying new flavors with you.

Zetsu grows a vegetable garden just for you, with everything you need fresh and tasty for your recipes.

Tobi/Obito Uchiha

Tobi >loves< sweets, make sweets for him and you'll have him curled up in the palm of your hand.

Both Tobi and Obito don't like spicy food.

He feels so loved when you cook for him <3 (a tip: prepare ramen for him when he's sad, it'll make him feel better).

Whenever he comes home early he brings you some sweets he bought at the bakery as a treat.

This is another man who is very easy to win over with his stomach. He'll feel very special if you tell him you've prepared something just for him. Make him your guinea pig for new recipes, he really doesn't mind and always gives you great feedback.

He always offers you the first bite out of respect, he is as happy to see you eating and talking about how tasty it is as he is to eat something you prepared.

Pein

Pein went through long periods of starvation as a child, so as much as it may seem, he isn't very picky about what he eats.

Likes hot and spicy foods. Hate sweets.

He is a great fan of your food, even if you've accidentally burnt it or overdone the seasoning, he'll be happy to eat something you've lovingly prepared.

Due to his work as leader of Akatsuki, he often forgets to eat properly. It's you who show up at his office and remind him to eat, with something you've prepared in hand, he's really grateful for your care.

He is always attentive to your needs. Did you like a cuter utensil kit than the ones you have? Are your. Wanting new seasonings? Suddenly they appear in your pantry. Everything you need.

Pein always makes it clear how he likes you to cook but that he doesn't want you to be overwhelmed with it, so he does everything to make this task easier for you, including ordering something from restaurants for you to eat and enjoy your free time together.

Konan

He likes mild sweets and, ironically, spicy foods. (Please make sweets for Konan, she likes a lot).

She will always feel like she is bothering or burdening you when you cook for her.

Konan isn't that good in the kitchen, so she's grateful to have a s/o who cooks so well. Sometimes she watches you cook to try to learn something, in an attempt to return the favor one day.

Buy a lot of sweets for you and make a point of always keeping your pantry well stocked so you don't have to worry about buying ingredients.

As I said, Konan doesn't like to burden you, so very often she takes you on restaurant dates.

Konan loves the culinary tours you plan, she could listen to you talk for hours about techniques, recipes and ideas. She loves seeing how excited you get talking about it.

Sorry for any typos;

Buy me a coffee?

Masterlist

[immoralimmortals]

I READ THEM TAGS OFFER EM UP MY LEIGE I NEED MARRIAGE HEADCANONS FOR THE AKATSUKI

(EDIT: this is by far my most popular post! If you like this, I have a longform akatsuki x reader fic pinned on my blog and linked here!)

You water my crops and put the stars in the sky. I'm madly in love with you. I'm bringing this post to your feet much like a cat does their favorite toy. I have caught it. Be proud of me, mother.

Even if it's less about the whole life of being married and more about the actual act of marrying, hope that's ok!

Akatsuki Marriage Headcanons, for real this time:

Pain:

I am a huge proponent of the popular fanon opinion that if this man takes you so seriously as to express a label for it (love, spouse, etc.), he is at the brink of worshiping your feet. Don't get me wrong, in terms of the arrangement of proposal and marriage ceremony, the leader is still in charge; however, he is dictating with every detail painstakingly about you. If there is decor, it is your favorite color. If you expressed you like a certain gemstone, he tracks it down for proposal and gets the finest cut upon your finger. You don't want an actual wedding? No problem, you're just going to come home to several thousand lit candles and a profession of commitment as deep from his heart as a corpse is in the grave.

The idea is that it is necessary for this bond to be formalized, at least for his own sake. Pain would refer to it as something you need to hear. If he is nothing else, he is serious about whatever he experiences emotionally; that goes for both his immense suffering and his most delicate of joys. He declares you his, neigh: commands...but only after you assure him yes.

If a traditional proposal is done, it must be in private. He dares not be too exposed. It's already so much that he has become vulnerable to you.

It is a hard privilege to earn. And so, the Akatsuki leader pays you back in kind. As long as you both shall live, you are his deity. You will never want, not as long as he is allowed to bask in you.

Pain kisses you firmly, one hand on your wrist and one on your back. You are to feel both his presence and his commitment.

A wedding song for you: Take me to Church by Hozier (yes I am a sucker for this song, yes yes and yes) or Ship in a Bottle by fin

Konan:

All at once, her heart aches in the best and worst ways, as it is such a curse of the Akatsuki to have had their loves taken too soon. Up till this point, she has been passive, letting you lead the relationship, but now- despite how much she yearns for the same- the angel stands her ground.

"Why?" you ask her in retaliation. She's thin-lipped as she refuses the real answer. It takes a couple tries over a few, staggered moments in private for the truth to tumble out:

She does not want another person she loves to die because of her. It's irrational; your death is not predetermined by the commitment. And yet it remains. She is scared, and the closer you get the more she stings.

But you have to press closer. You have to assure, promise, fight your way back into her heart as it tries to close you out in self protection. You succeed, thanks to one of the reasons you adore Konan: her capacity to hope, no matter the circumstance. Reminder her of that, and she can only be yours.

The wedding is small, the two of you and whomever you deem precious enough to witness. (I imagine probably not even a full handful). It is twilight and the color of the world is shaded blue. Blue as her hair, blue as she feels whenever you're away, blue in the same way the purest of whites are to the human eye. You are pristine. The paper that folds the bouquets that drape around you are spotless and glow in the moonlight in such a way they're almost lanterns. Their starkly pale and crisply folded nature surround as if it is her prayer that everything that is good may stay that way.

Konan kisses you in such a way that no part of you but your lips touch one another. It is chaste, it is soft, it is a seal.

A wedding song for you: Saturn by Sleeping at Last (I cry every single time I hear this in full. I sincerely think there are few songs that have so viscerally touched me like this one has.) or Soul Meets Body by Death Cab for Cutie

Obito:

You cannot get his single-mindedness off of Rin. There is no way around it, and anything meant as distraction will not only fail but backfire on you. Therefore, if you are this deep into a partnership, you are there not in spite of her but thanks to her. You will be compared and contrasted to no end; this is not cruel, it is merely how he shapes his worldview in regards to goodness and love. You are his second chance. You are his solitude.

You don't get opportunity to propose. He will tell you first.

It is every definition of a ceremony, almost ritualistic, almost like they're crowning a king/queen. The ceilings are tall and decorated with the visage of ancestors and gods. Incense is lit and the setting sun sets the room on fire with orange and red. You are presented to him, ornate in the way he demands. A masked face cannot hide the lust and satisfaction in his voice. His hand reaches out, and you take it. For perhaps the first time, the mask is tilted to hide from their audience while still showing his scarred face to you.

His kiss is hard. Not sloppy, but hard. His hand is on the back of your head, and he going to press you into him until your soul enters his body.

A wedding song for you: Come Along by Cosmo Sheldrake or Sick of Losing Soulmates by dodie

Bad relationship songs because I can't control myself: Anybody Else by Dom Fera (THE song of all time for me, I love it) or Sex with a Ghost by Teddy Hyde

Zetsu:

Marriage? That's a fascinating concept. He's never had the desire for this kind of relationship before, but as you talk more and more of it, the more he grasps. In the end, it is a concept that matters to you, and he can appreciate the sentiment of it.

The weirdest part, honestly, is that you reserved such a thing for him.

Though he follows along (you must guide the entire arrangement), he quietly, curiously doubts the whole time. But your guiding hand is so soft as you take him and lead, so nice onto his skin as you select two rings and slide one on each color of hand. You make no mistake: it is both you are marrying. It is both you are committing to. That recognition is his first step into a hesitant acceptance of your eternal love.

When the time comes, you walk him to the first place you met, beside a large tree in a clearing with no human settlement in sight. None of the "don't see the bride/groom" tradition, it has no room here. Any amount of people you want are there, regardless of if it is everyone or no one. (He would prefer no one, but this is all for you, after all). As you're about to kiss him, he makes one request. It is the only thing Zetsu has asked for in all of this time:

Let him taste you.

How can you tell him no?

So his bi-colored lips part, taking your bottom lip into his first, and then rounded teeth gently drag the flesh into his mouth. Pressure is applied and you taste your blood, though fleetingly as he drinks it in. In all the time you've known him, this is the closest Zetsu has ever been to you. In this symbolic action, you have finally gained his full and complete trust.

Zetsu's kiss is metallic but it is not cold. It is pensive, meditative, doing his best to understand that which you crave, and so he does his best to crave you. He cups your face in both of his ringed hands so he need not focus on anything but your taste.

A wedding song for you: & by Tally Hall or Yes to Err is Human, So Don't Be One by Will Wood

Hidan:

At first he's going to make fun of you. He's going to tell you that this is the dumbest idea he's ever heard. And when you go quiet and don't bring it up again, he is going to pin you down and demand to be told why you changed your mind.

This man wants you so much, he can't fathom it. What is marriage if you must slaughter your neighbor? Well...a lover is a step above neighbor, isn't it?

Thank Jashin he doesn't need to kill you to get married.

If you do a traditional wedding, he will drag his feet but he will do it. It's to your detriment alone, really, how obnoxious he'd be. If you pin a flower to his lapel, he'll rip it off. He'll spit to the side in disgust at any mushy gushy talk done in front of others in this bastardization of another religion's ritual. This isn't a real ceremony. Let him show you what a wedding really is:

It's going to end up with your blood on his body and his blood on yours. He makes you straddle his lap, in the middle of the symbol of his lord that he's drawn upon the floor. The same sigil is dangled from a chain, his necklace held between you, from your view right between his intense violet eyes. The metal is cold as it plays a barrier between your lips and his.

Hidan's kiss is reverent. If this Jashinist is marrying you, he fucking means it. Do more than tolerate the cut a knife makes into your palm; pray to it.

...And then he will pray to you.

A wedding song for you: I Wanna Be Your Slave by Maneskin or Misanthrapologist by Will Wood

Bad relationship song I can't help but add: This is Love by Air Traffic Controller

Kakuzu:

Despite popular belief, this is not a man who fusses over money the way Scrooge does over every last coin. By the contrary, it is that he is a man that does not have much to give. This is in every sense, it turns out. Kakuzu is a man that has had all hope in humanity and for himself beat the hell out of him, so it's a shock to him if you hint at a desire for marriage. A mistake, that's what you're trying to make, here. At first he'll rebuff with few words but still sure, but it'll hitch onto him like a tick. A traditional man at heart, you know best to let him propose himself.

And so he does. It is the only time you've ever seen him doubt himself, but of course you tell him yes. As you throw your arms around him, that's when reality hits in the best of ways.

He does not wait, not if you don't oppose him. He takes you to a temple, middle of nowhere with no one either of you or your nations will know. For an old man, it's such a romantic, young man's task to arrange to elope. The priest marries you, as you sit side by side at the break of dawn upon his stoop. He wears his mask, still wears long robes to cover his stitches, but his silky brown hair drifts so beautifully with the wind; he will say this compliment is one he had of you and yours, when he looks back upon today. You are his world, intertwined in an immortal and mortal life.

Kakuzu does not kiss you at the wedding. That comes later, when no one else is there. He pulls down his mask and takes your mouth upon his, tangled until one of you can't breathe anymore.

A wedding song for you: Vanilla Curls by Teddy Hyde or Budapest by George Ezra

Deidara:

A flirt he may be, but a guy of commitment? Hell no. At first he's really flattered, chuckling and letting a large smirk trail up one side of his face. It falls when he realizes you're being serious. "Wait, really?" You nod, and his always-intense stare seems a bit closer to concerned.

"My dear...you're getting carried away, aren't you?" he offers like a second chance to not embarrass yourself.

Everything, as it always has for Deidara, has happened so fast it hits him before he recognizes what it is. Love is included, even and up until the point he's in this deep. Honestly? It terrifies him. He'll laugh and walk away, but it'll fucking haunt him.

A couple days of flying on a bird, all by his lonesome, and he returns with a bit of a different view. Life is short, beauty is fleeting: the opportunity is here and damned if he don't take it. He offers your hand- both in marriage and for a ride- and you soar into the sky.

There's no such thing as a traditional wedding, no need for it when the most beautiful things in the world are you and his art. Explosions and fireworks alike light up the night sky and he leans over to whisper his dedication upon your lips.

Deidara's kiss is, of course, bombastic. It's intense and with tongue and repeats, over and over, never lasting too long as he can't keep his love-drunk words to himself for longer than two seconds. Streamers and confetti flutter around your heads, grander than any parade for any newly wed prince or princess.

A wedding song for you: The Cult of Dionysus by The Orion Experience or Fear and Delight by The Correspondents

Sasori:

Only someone who knows him as well as you will pick up the subtlest shifts of the scorpion's expression, the way brown eyes barely widen. You bring it up, nearly like a dream you had, nearly like you're talking to yourself in your sleep, but he hears it. Sasori continues with his work, the monotony of woodwork allowing him to chew on the idea. A marriage isn't necessary, of course...but he also will lie to himself about how downright alluring the symbolism of a wedding is.

If the most beautiful things are eternal, why not your love?

If you've gotten him so far that Sasori will consider whatever form of affection he can manage in his barely organic heart, then he will make every second of your life never-ending bliss.

He decorates you, almost like one of his dolls, in the finest patterns of fabric and sleekest of jewelry. He pains over every inch of skin on top of muscle and bone, the way the ring slips on your finger and the way your wrist bends to do it. The ritual is an art piece, and you gaze upon him so marvelously... Your lips part with such slight but sure poise...

The venue is silent and you both are alone. Not even a bird caws, no insect chirps. Pure, clear as glass silence. You are the only two beings in all of existence. You will ascend time itself. A single candle is lit as you sit in the deepest depths of this cave, where no one may interrupt.

Where no one can hear him confess to you.

Sasori's kiss is soft, far too soft. He holds both of your hands so delicately, like they're on a string. Lines of chakra help you move into him in a way that is just right, just utterly perfect.

A wedding song for you: Thumbnail by Louie Zong and Brian David Gilbert or Dark of the Matinee by Franz Ferdinand

Kisame:

Shockingly enough, this guy is going to be your hardest sell. Perhaps predictably, it isn't because he dislikes marriage, settling down, falling in love. Disliking and opposing are very different things.

He panics, at least just a little the first time you mention it. "I'm a shinobi, you know. You won't see me very much." Time passes on, and your desire appears again:

"I'm a rough guy. Just take a second to think about what you're asking for, alright?"

More time, and more desperation on his part with your persistence:

"I am meant to die alone," he finally tells you outright. "Don't bother with me. You could be spending your time so much better than fussing over someone who isn't going to last."

But you do, and he does last. Unfortunately, he does last. It gnaws him to the bone.

"Alright," he'll ask you, a long time since you first expressed your wants, "Are you certain?" You say yes, of course you say yes. Bittersweet, sharp teeth smile. "Very well," the swordsman concedes.

You marry traditionally, though very small. A hood drapes over him, hiding his face as the priest speaks the seal of marriage. His hand clings to yours, so very afraid of losing you. Or worse: making you lose him.

With the formalities out of the way, his own way begins. Finally alone, you both plunge into deep water, a loud splash quickly muting to flooded ears. He holds your face as your hair drifts past him in strands noses nearly touching. Kisame gets a good look at you before he changes everything forever, closing his eyes.

Kisame's kiss is a leap of faith. It tastes like lake water and seaweed and his love. He presses all of you into him like a shell holds a pearl, limbs climbing around you as you suspend in water and sink. Breathe into him, breathe deep. Every last breath in his lungs is just for you.

A wedding song for you: Against the Kitchen Floor by Will Wood or If I'm Being Honest by dodie

Itachi:

The implications of this circumstance are astounding. He loves you- yes, of course he does- but what's more is that he loves you enough to be so selfish as to gift himself to you, even knowing the fate he's reserved. It is both impressive and heartbreaking. Have hope, you ask of him. That is all you ask of him. Give it a chance. It is what he wants, isn't it?

Of course it is. But are you okay if the inevitable comes true?

You pause, and he studies your naive, innocent eyes. But you know more than perhaps Itachi has realized. You know it is okay to treasure. It is okay to enjoy. The journey matters more than the destination. Yes, it is okay, you tell him, you love to love him all the same.

Dark eyes close. Then he will give you what is desired.

Kisame is present, of course, as well as the ancestors of the Uchiha clan in spirit. You are radiant, and he tells you so. You return the compliment in soft earnest. A single hand cups your cheek as he approaches, pausing to feel and taste your breath as it drifts into his mouth.

Itachi's kiss is barely there, like he's afraid of breaking glass. If you want to kiss deeper, you'll need to go in and get it yourself. Just don't mistake delicacy for a lack of interest. This is the most of his body he has ever given in his entire life. Just give him time.

A wedding song for you: Herbal Tea by Velvet Moon or Here For You by Good Co

[or0ch1maru]

can i request the akatsuki members reaction to the reader wearing a prosthetic mask and having burn scars under it? (like sally face lol)

Omg this yes

The akatsuki has seen and been through A LOT. They may be hardened criminals but they would also be the most understanding about pretty much everything. They would just show it differently.

🏮Tobi:

•I feel like he’d be the most understanding since he wears one for similar reasons. He would never pressure you to remove your mask or show your face. He’d be so patient about it too, even if that meant waiting years.

•when the time comes when you feel comfortable enough to show him, he’d look at you with pride. I could see him gently caressing your scars and telling you how proud he is of you and that you’re so beautiful/ handsome.

•Tobi would never hesitate to show you how much he cares/loves you. Especially if he knows you’re feeling a little insecure. Would plaster your scars with kisses and gentle touches. He would also go out and buy you creams, whether it’s scar cream, or just regular moisturizer. Tobi would take his time massaging it into your skin, not missing a spot.

•he would offer his mask to you(if yours broke or it didn’t feel comfortable against your skin) Tobi would think you’re the cutest person in the world if you took him up on that offer, but yet again he thinks you’re the cutest person ever regardless.

🏮Zetsu:

•I personally feel like white Zetsu would be more comforting towards you about it. He wouldn’t push or pry, he’d be curious yes, but he wouldn’t force you to do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe.

•black Zetsu would keep his curiosity to himself and would be content either way. If you trusted him enough with showing him your face, he’d never break your trust. He wouldn’t tell anybody, no matter how much they would ask or beg even.

•all in all, Zetsu would be happy as long as you are. He would feel honored that you trusted him.

•has a hard time voicing his affections and feelings so most of the time Zetsu would randomly caress and touch your face, over the mask when around others, and would pull your mask up so he can see your face when you’re alone with him.

🏮Itachi:

•sweet boy.

•just like Tobi, Itachi would never coerce you. Would be so attentive and patient.

•when the day came that you took your mask off in front of him for the first time, he’d fall in love with you all over again. To know that somebody feels so safe around him to show him something nobody else knows, he’d be so happy.

•the first thing he would do is kiss you. Wanting you to know that he loves you no matter what. (We love a non judgmental man)

•Itachi would always ask you before touching your scars and would never get upset if you said no. (If they were still sensitive or you weren’t comfortable with that yet, etc)

🏮Kisame:

•big shark man..oooof. Kisame is the type of man to love you for who you are, no matter what. Even if you had webbed feet or four eyes.

•kisa has gone through moments where he would feel insecure due to his looks and sheer size. Always wondering how he could be loved by somebody.

•so when you decided to take your mask off in front of him for the first time, his eyes would be hearts. No literally ❤️_❤️, this would be how he’d stare at you for the first few minutes after.

•from that point on he would cup your face in his big hands, planting a big ole kiss on you. When it gets colder, he’d use his body heat to keep your face warm. Knows that scars can be sensitive and sometimes even painful when the weather shifts.

🏮Kakuzu

•never really cared for anything or anybody except for money so when you came along, you intrigued him more than cash ever did. Which is rare for him.

•would be very accepting towards the mask, since he wears one too.

•wouldn’t voice it right away but he would think you’re a total badass when he sees you without it for the first time. Makes a comment about you being a mini him. Tends to use humor and soft jokes as his main way of showing affection.

•if you ever felt comfortable enough, would totally let you wear his mask. He would think you look so cute. He’s also a big gift giver so I could imagine him getting you a custom mask. Would make that man feel good seeing you walk around wearing something he gave you.

🏮Hidan:

•our sadistic baby. When you two first met, he made a comment about you being just like Kakuzu. “What’s with you people? Why hide all the time?”

•wouldn’t think much of it at the beginning, only because he’s around a handful of people who wear masks and use other things to hide their identity.

•when he puts 2 and 2 together and realizes you wear it for a different reason, he would be so protective of you. If he sees someone trying to remove your mask, he’d freak. Say bye bye. If he hears others talking bad about you for wearing it, he would make sure they know to keep their mouths shut.

•his protective nature would only increase after you show him your face for the first time.

•whenever the two of you are out and about, he would keep a spare tube of moisturizer on him in case you needed it.

•he’s always seen as some cultist asshole but he has a soft side(if you disagree, argue with the wall lol) would coo cute little praises and compliments towards you. He’d want you to know how pretty you are at all times.

🏮deidara:

•would react similarly to Hidan at the beginning. He’s so used to Sasori hiding his real face/body from the world so he wouldn’t bat an eye towards your mask.

•when you got comfortable around him to show him, you’d be his muse.

•deidara would draw and make small sculptures of you with his clay. Would place them proudly on his desk/bedside table, etc. only if you want him too, of course. he wouldn’t do it if he felt like you weren’t 100% in on the idea.

•would marvel at you anytime he got, even during times when you two were around others and your mask was back on. Deidara loved the idea that he has his own little private art piece that only he sees.

🏮Sasori:

•just like deidara, Sasori wouldn’t think twice about why you keep yourself hidden. Wouldn’t force, push, pry, or beg you to take it off. He wants you to feel safe around him for you to do so.

•Sasori is more reserved and quiet compared to the rest of his akatsuki mates, but that would change the day you showed him your face.

•compliments such as “gods you’re irresistible”, and “come here, let me paint/draw you” would slip past the red heads lips.

•his biggest pride is his art, so just like Dei, you would become Sasori’s muse. Would love nothing more than to sketch your features all the time. He wants you to know that he loves you. So much

•another thing I could see him doing, as long as you’re comfortable with it, would be for him to draw or paint on your scars. His paintbrush would be soft against your skin as he moves the brush all along your face. Sasori would take in the soft hums and contented noises you make as he does this.

🏮Konan:

•would think your mask is cute, especially if you added things to it to make it suit your personality more(stickers, small drawings, etc)

•Konan would compliment your mask all the time. “You’re so cute, you know that right?” Or “I don’t know how much cuter you could get. Mask or not.”

•she would want to add something to your mask, would definitely make an origami butterfly to stick on there somewhere. I could see her choosing your cheek. She would also randomly come up to you and kiss your mask

•the day that you show Konan what you look like without it, she wouldn’t say anything at first. She would simply plant her lips softly against your scars, making sure to cover them completely with little affectionate smooches.

•everyday after that when you two are alone she’d lift your mask slightly, wanting to see your face as it’s her happy place. Would smother you in soft kisses before gently pulling it back down.

🏮pain:

•being the leader of a criminal organization can be hectic, chaotic and stressful. Wouldn’t pay much mind to the mask for quite some time, not because he doesn’t care but he wouldn’t want you to feel uncomfortable if he draws to much attention to it.

•he’d be in his office when you knock. His first thought would be that you’re going to talk to him about a mission but would turn speechless when you take your mask off. His gaze lingers on your scars as he takes in your beauty.

•pain would gesture you to come to him, pulling you into his lap as he gently traces your scars with his finger.

•he would reassure you that you’re beautiful, and that he is so proud of you for taking such a big step in trust.

•eye contact is a big thing for him, as he feels like it’s an intimate connection and would always make sure to look you in the eyes when he compliments you so you know he means it.

I hope you enjoy this, it’s been a while since I’ve written anything so excuse this if it sucks. I’d love more soft writing prompts about the akatsuki🥰

[ijustwanttoreadfanfictionplease]

Hey Baby!

My FIRST Naruto Smau ! You text the Akatsuki Short because I was trying out the infamous MeMi messaging app to make this. Again, I've never tried anything like this but I've read a TON of JJK and Naruto Smau (but not much Akatsuki!) And wanted to try 🤞

Features: Madara, Konan, Pein, Tobi /Obito, Zetsu, Sasori, Deidara, Itachi, Kisame, Hidan, Kakuzu

[ladykissingfish]

*in the Akatsuki backyard*

Sasori: Er, Kisame? What are you doing with them?

*Kisame looks up; he’s currently got Itachi sitting on one of his outstretched arms and Deidara on the other*

Kisame: Kakuzu’s fault. *starts doing squats, still with his arms out* Said there was no money in the budget to buy me a set of weighs. So I’m improvising.

Sasori: Aren’t they awfully heavy?

Kisame: Yes, but I need this. Samehada weighs quite a bit as well, and I need to keep both arms strengthened in order to wield him.

Deidara: This is nice, hm. Uchiha, you’re lucky you can get this whenever you want. Unlike ME and my partner …

Sasori: What do you mean, unlike you? I could pick you up and hold you in my arms as well. And for much longer than he’d be able to. No offense, Kisame.

Deidara: *scoffs* Yeah, right. I’ll believe that when I see it.

Sasori: You know what? Fine. *turns towards the house and yells* Konan! Come out here, please!

Deidara: Danna, what are you —

*Konan comes out* What is it, Sasori?

Sasori: *goes to Kisame and takes Deidara off of his arm* Take Deidara’s place, will you? He is about to learn a hard lesson. *balances Deidara bridal-style in his own arms*

Deidara, blushing: D-danna! Put me down!

Sasori, ignoring him: You’re rather lightweight, aren’t you? But no matter; you’re going to stay right where you are until you admit that my holding power is superior to Kisame’s. *walks off with Deidara still in his arms*

Kisame: *gently sets down Itachi and Konan* Wow; I can’t believe Deidara’s plan actually worked. What a clever brat.

Itachi: I’d bet my entire next paycheck that Deidara will still be in his arms tomorrow morning.

Konan: You’re really lowballing it there; that boy won’t be coming down until next year at the earliest.

[adrunkskeletonsduck]

Hᴏᴡ ⵊ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴛʜᴇ Aᴋᴀᴛsᴜᴋɪ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴅʀᴇss ɪʀʟ

Nᴀʀᴜᴛᴏ Mᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

Deidara - Dresses like an Edgar who does art. I js know he has those shiny ass belts and pants to his fuckin knees. First photo is canon, it’s the first post on his Insta. His closet is black and white, and he never leaves the house without the gold chain.

Itachi - He likes sweaters and baggy jeans or sweatpants. I feel like he gravitates more towards dark colors, specifically dark reds, blues, browns and blacks. Also he likes gray sweatpants 😏. He wears minimal silver jewelry so just thin rings and one or two necklaces. When it gets hot he just wears short sleeves (a lot of white tshirts)

Hidan - Button ups and and jeans. The way he dresses kinda gives dad vibes but he doesn’t care bc it’s easy and put together without looking super formal. This man also doesn’t get cold so in the winter he might throw on a think jacket but usually he sticks with short sleeves.

Konan - Business casual chic, typa look. Like Pein, she knows she's important and wants to look the part. I can see her wearing lots of blacks and whites, but she likes to throw in fun colors (esp purples) and accessories as well. She's so pretty

Kisame - He loves turtle necks omgg! Matches them with dress pants and a thin belt. Like Itachi he likes darker colors. Heavy on the black and navy blue clothing though. He also likes more fitted shirts. It makes him look put together but casual all the same and he likes that, also makes him look hot which he likes as well

Sasori - His outfits are pretty casual, just jeans, a plain colored shirt (sometimes his shirt will have design but if it does its subtle), and a jacket. Always a jacket, he doesn't leave the house without one. His favorite is this red jacket that matches the color of his hair perfectly. Silver necklaces and simple silver rings.

Pein - Always dressed for business. He's a suit and tie guy 24/7 typa guy, but sometimes he'll take of his suit jacket and unbutton a button or two on his shirt and loosen his tie and jesus does he look goodddd. He also wears silver rings, however his are 100% real silver

Tobi - Colorful cyber y2k. He can match any color together and make it look good, its insane. Likes blingy ass belts and has his ears pierced (they got infected within two weeks of getting them done because he didn’t take care of them properly). Very fun fits overall!

[succikko-draws]

"Day 7: Rainy days"

@kisames-corner 7th and last piece for Kisame week! Ending it with a soft note :3

[Image ID: A digital drawing of Kisame petting samehada outside in the rain. Nagato and Konan, with her wings deployed around them, are by his side. Kisame is crouching, cupping Samehada's face as she wags her tail happily like a dog. Konan has her hand on Kisame's back, a soft smile on her face as she looks at Samehada. Nagato reaches down with his hand to pet Samehada too, with the same kind of soft expression as Konan. The three of them are dressed in their akatsuki robes. The rain pours on the four of them, forming puddles on the ground. The background is teal with hint of blue mist. /.End ID]

[yowyowyaoi]

*Deidara, laying flat on his back in bed*

Deidara: Now … which side should I lay on, hm?

Deidara: If I turn to my right, I can look at the window. But that can be distracting and I need to fall asleep.

Deidara: If I turn to my left, I’m facing the wall, and the pillow feels cooler, BUT I’d be facing that stain that looks like a spider.

Deidara: What to do, what to do?

Sasori, at his desk, trying to work: How about just closing your eyes and shutting up before I kick you out of here??

Deidara: You’re so insensitive, Danna. You know what would help? If I had two body pillows for either side of me, hm. Then I could stay like this and feel comfortable all night.

Sasori: Body pillows? Fine; give me a few minutes.

*later that night, Konan passes by the room on her way to get water and sees Sasori’s door open a crack*

Konan: Sasori? Are you still working? I have such a headache, can you give me some —

Konan: Er … what in the world is going on here?!

*in the bed, Deidara is still laying on his back in the middle, but now Itachi is curled up against one side of him, and Hidan is at the other. all three are sound asleep*

Sasori: The brat wanted body pillows, so I got him body pillows.

Konan:

Kisame and Kakuzu, who have been waiting for their partners to come back from “getting a snack” for 4 hours:

Tobi, about to come in and suggest that Deidara could use another “body pillow” to lay on top of:

[thehusbandoden]

Akatsuki Masterlist:

Itachi Uchiha (1)

(Itachi Uchiha)

Konan (0)

(Konan)

Nagato (0)

(Nagato)

Obito Uchiha (0)

(Obito Uchiha)

Yahiko (0)

(Yahiko)

~~~~~

Naruto Shippuden masterlist | Navigation | You can tip me here <3

Reblogs and feedback are greatly appreciated!!

Last posted: 10/08/23

~~~~~

Do not copy, repost, nor plagiarize my work. Ask before you translate or use my work in any way -minus reblogging.

[indigosuvi]

Are You Okay?

age in bio when interacting. minors do not interact.

Word Count: 507 / Read it on AO3 / Wattpad | Event List

You sat alone in the Hidden Leaf Village. Away from people and away from the city.

You sat on a tree stump, your head in hand as you looked at the grass.

The clouds cover the sun and make it colder and darker in the city.

You had a jacket on and weren't at all bothered by the cold.

It was your favorite spot to go to when you wanted to be away from everyone and everything.

Pain finished the meeting with the Akatsuki and stood outside the mouth of the cave. 

His favorite spot looked like it just might be occupied.

He looked back, seeing the Akatsuki members talking with one another.

He slipped away unnoticed.

The journey would be far. He didn't mind, though. It would be worth it. He didn't want anyone to feel alone in the world. He knew what it was like. He lost both his parents and with no one else; he was forced to care for himself.

He formed the Akatsuki with two fellow orphans, hoping to make the world a better place.

He hated the fighting, the loss, and the pain that it caused.

His footsteps hurried at times and slowly at others. He wanted to make sure you were okay, but doubt crossed his mind. You were just fine. What if you weren't?

His face was emotionless as he came closer to you. Seeing you sitting on the stump, he knelt to be at the same level you were.

"Are you okay?" He asked, as his eyebrows creased with worry.

"I'm fine." You responded. Sitting up, you looked down at him.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just come here to be alone at times. People and life can be stressful."

He nodded as he rose and looked down at you. 

"Would you like to hang out?"

You raised an eyebrow as you looked up at him.

"What do you mean?"

He breathed in and looked away before looking at you once again.

"Like spend time together. Go to the movies, hang out with my friends, something so you aren't alone?"

"Oh- sure."

He reached a hand out to you and you took it as he helped you to stand. 

You thanked him and he led you to the Akatsuki cave.

"I'm…" He paused as he looked at you. "Nagato."

"I'm Y/N, nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you, too."

The Akatsuki had left long ago, but Konan remained. 

He introduced you to her and she to you.

Konan welcomed you with a hug. 

It was through her that you learned more about the Akatsuki and its leader Nagato. He chose to go by the alias of 'Pain' something he knew a lot about, given his childhood.

She, too, had lost her family at a young age and had found Nagato. She saved him and brought him to a place she hid in.

She took the flower from her hair and offered it to you. You smiled and took it, thanking her as you did.

© SUVIDRACHE — do not copy, translate, modify, or plagiarize my work. reblogs are appreciated!

Tag list: @phantomheiko / To join my tag list apply here!

[cosmic-glow]

A Beach Day with Akatsuki

Summary: how would each of the Akatsuki members be in the cliche anime beach episode.

Warnings: mentions of deaths and alcoholic beverages. SFW.

Characters: Pein; Konan; Tobi; Zetsu; Itachi; Kisame; Deidara; Sasori; Hidan and Kakuzu (from Naruto).

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Kisame

Kisame liked the idea from the beginning.

As soon as he gets to the beach he goes straight to the water.

Likes to surf.

And it's really good at it.

He doesn't wear sunscreen.

He spends practically all day in the water.

He just goes out to pull someone out to sea with him.

Or to buy some ice cream.

He randomly comes out of the water sometimes and brings a very nice shell or rock and gives it to someone.

He tries to pull Itachi out to sea with him just to provoke him.

Kisame would come out of the water in the afternoon to watch the sun go down.

While drinking something refreshing, like coconut water or a drink.

That man was so comfortable.

It upsets him to have to leave the beach.

The next day he is locked in his room, sunburnt.

He doesn't want to go out for  doesn't have to overhear Itachi saying "I told you" for refusing to apply sunscreen.

Still, he really liked his day at the beach and would do it all over again.

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Kakuzu

He didn't want to come.

Like, beach is just a warm place with salt water and sand, what's fun about that? That's what he thinks.

He is really in a bad mood.

He can't even cool off in the sea because he can't swim due to his stitched up body.

He tries to relax sitting in the shade of the parasol while reading a book.

But any noise bothers him.

And a beach with Deidara, Hidan and Tobi is sure to be noisy.

He eventually decides to walk to the edge of the sea away from the group while checking his bingo book.

Was that or kill those three.

In the end, when he is well away from the group he manages to enjoy the beach a little.

He sits near some palm trees.

The waves gently lap at him feet in a relaxing manner.

And finally the silence that he loves so much.

He would only reappear in the group in the evening, when started to cool down.

He is not sad that he has to leave.

And he would never admit that he enjoyed the quiet moments he spent alone.

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Tobi/Obito

Ever since he learned that him be going to the beach he has been extremely anxious.

He is wearing those bathing suits that cover the whole body, like surfers do.

But he doesn't surf.

Yes, he is wearing the mask even on the beach.

Doesn't stop at any moment.

He would go into the sea to jump the waves and end up falling as soon as they took their eyes off him.

Then he would get up as if nothing had happened.

He has been bothering Deidara since they arrived.

"Wow Deidara-senpai, I didn't know your abdomen was so defined" - would be just one of the comments he make to tease the blond.

Tobi is a good boy, so he put sunscreen on the parts that his suit doesn't cover.

Takes too much ice cream and ends up freezing his brain.

He would not want to leave the beach.

Would only do it when it was getting dark.

Definitely a happy child enjoying his day at the beach.

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Hidan

For Akatsuki to be able to go to a beach it would have to be isolated.

And well, I'm saying this because Hidan was responsible for offering Jashin anyone who showed up bothering.

He's a narcissist and made a point of getting a swimsuit that didn't cover too much and value his ass.

At first, he avoids getting into the water because he doesn't want to get his hair wet.

But when he enters the sea it's scary to see how he spends hours underwater since he can't die by drowning.

Enjoys bothering Kakuzu... as usual.

He purposely wets Deidara's hair.

Hidan wasn't worried about sunscreen.

After all, he's immortal, what difference does it make?

What no one knows is that he ended up going through the fear of losing the pale shade he likes so much.

He has who brought the alcohol.

He keeps drinking and bothering others with silly pranks.

Leave the beach at the end of the sunset already drunk.

He found the day at the beach fun.

After all he didn't have to work and spent all day drinking and making fun of the members, why would he complain?

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Zetsu

He likes sunbathe.

Obviously him don't wear sunscreen, because he don't need it.

Would avoid going into the sea because of the salt water.

White Zetsu wants to make a sand castle.

But doesn't work out too well because black Zetsu refuses.

He likes to drink a lot of water.

Zetsu purposely walks away from the group.

He likes to be alone and it is no surprise to anyone.

He finds the sound of the sea very relaxing.

White Zetsu wants to take the little shells he finds home.

Black Zetsu wants to eat the crabs he finds.

At some point he would end up sleeping.

Would only wake up when the sun started to set.

And then finally would return to the group to leave.

White Zetsu really enjoyed the day at the beach and think was relaxing.

Black Zetsu didn't think it was bad, but he wouldn't admit it and would say it was a waste of time.

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Deidara

“Finally a rest day” - that's what he thought, until he saw how Tobi can be even more irritating on the beach.

The beach is a very inspiring place for an artist.

So Deidara is trying not to waste all his explosive clay on Tobi.

He wants to tan, not burn, so he put on sunscreen.

Deidara knows and likes to surf.

And he's annoyed that Kisame is better than him at this.

He was avoiding going into the sea until Hidan wet his hair.

His bathing suit is the prettiest.

This boy has style.

He would retreat at some point to make sand castles without being seen.

Prefer to eat slushies.

Would want to compete with Itachi on something.

And would say he cheated when he lost and walk away from the group.

Collect shells <3

He tries to sunbathe, but Deidara is the kind of person who can't sit still.

So it's useless.

The sunset is art for him, after all it is temporary.

Appears out of nowhere in the group when they are leaving.

At the end of the day he's sulking.

Because the day at the beach was not what he expected.

… But he liked it.

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Itachi

To be honest, he doesn't really like the beach.

Like, he can't deny the place is beautiful, but what is he going to do here?

He ends up sitting in the shade of the parasol watching others have fun.

Most of the shells Kisame brings from the water are for him.

He obviously use  sunscreen.

And brought it, in case anyone forgot.

In fact, the bag with everything needed for a day at the beach is his.

He doesn't really like the idea of ​​going into the sea.

The most he'd do is get his feet wet because it's relaxing.

He's the one who bought Kisame's ice cream while he was getting out of the water.

He's not paying attention to Deidara's taunts.

And he made no effort to beat him.

He likes the sound of the sea.

Take the opportunity to rest for a while.

He ends up getting so relaxed and quiet you could swear he's sleeping sitting up.

Itachi finds the sunset a bit melancholy but beautiful.

Is eager to return to the group's hideout.

The next day he know that Kisame doesn't want to leave his room because he's sunburned.

He didn't think the day at the beach was all bad, but he would have preferred to go somewhere else.

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Pein

Honestly, he only accepted all this because of Konan.

Doesn't like warm places, so the beach is not his favorite place.

He came just to make sure that nothing bad would happened.

He refers to Hidan, Deidara and Tobi in the same place for more than 5 minutes.

And he doesn't want anyone to bother Konan either.

Konan who reminded him to wear sunscreen.

Pain likes to eat watermelon when he is at the beach, is refreshing.

He won't go into the sea, don't even try.

Doesn't like ice cream very much.

He doesn't really like sweets in general, they make him thirsty.

He notices when someone moves away.

Being honest, he is just waiting for the day to end.

He understands why they think sunsets are beautiful, him thought too when he saw how Konan admired the sky.

Pein makes sure that everyone is present as they come back.

Tobi tests his patience by refusing to return "so soon".

He understands that a rest is necessary... But for him it was just a wasted day.

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Konan

She was who gave the idea to go to the beach.

Konan likes to sunbathe, even though she's very pale.

Hoped that this day would be at least a little relaxing for Pain.

Konan would read a book in the shade while listening to the sound of the waves.

Likes to drink refreshing drinks, eat scratch cards, eat watermelon, etc.

She is enjoying the moment.

Would go into the sea to cool off a bit, but she would be quick.

Konan is very stylish, so her bikini makes her look radiant.

She really wants to play in the sand for a while.

But as we know she is shy, and ends up being embarrassed.

Didn't approve of the idea that Hidan could kill anyone who came along.

But her understand why Pein thinks it's necessary.

She loves the different shades that appear in the sky as the sun goes down.

Left the beach a little reluctantly.

She who manages to convince Tobi to leave.

Konan liked her day at the beach but wishes she had enjoyed it more.

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Sasori

He wonders why he had to come along.

Like, there's nothing for him to enjoy on the beach.

Not that he can't go into the sea, but he's a puppet, the job he'd take to get the water out of his body.

Not to mention that salt water can wear out his body.

Definitely out of the question.

The only problem is that all that sand and hot sun just reminds him more and more of his old village.

He doesn't have a problem with the heat at all, he actually likes it.

He would try to distract himself by looking for pretty rocks.

Kisame would notice and bring some for him.

He'd be so focused on this that he wouldn't realize he'd ended up walking away from the group.

He ended up getting wet when he picked up a rock too close to the sea and a wave came to meet him.

He returns to the group grumpy after that.

Sasori lies down waiting for the sun to dry him and ends up sleeping.

Hidan and Deidara bury him in the sand.

He hasn't seen the sunset and is just grumpy wanting to go back to hiding.

But he is taking the rocks he found with him.

He doesn't want to repeat the experience.

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Sorry for any typos;

Buy me a coffee?

Masterlist

[sueske]

What’s the best het ship in naruto in your opinion?

the bar is looooow. probably tsunade and dan.

[or0ch1maru]

How about Akatsuki members meeting their future lover for the first time?

I love getting requests when I’m the perfect amount of drunk lol

This is honestly so freaking cute. Ugh🥰😩

So I know this is more of a sfw prompt but for hidan I couldn’t help myself. 18+ just for him lmao.

•

🏮Hidan:

•you two would simply start out as friends with benefits. Fucking each other whenever you had the urge or if either of you had a particularly rough week

•both of you say the same thing. “It’s strictly pleasure, no feelings involved”…and the two of you believed that until….

•Hidan was pussy drunk, babbling filthy things in your ear while he has you bent in half in the mating press. Your nails digging into his arms as he tears yet another orgasm out of you

•your thighs soaked with your slick, Hidan’s thrusts becoming sloppy as he nears his orgasm. “Fuck, this pussys so good..gonna’” Hidan mumbles out. “Love you” the two words slip from his lips as he pulls out of you, coming all over your lower stomach

• “love you too” you say softly in return as he presses his forehead to yours, both of you breathing heavily as you come down from your highs

•it’s not until you two are nearly dressed that the words register. Neither of you say anything else, at least not until Hidan has his cock buried deep in you once again, this time at a much slower and more passionate pace. Begging to hear you say the words again

🏮Kakuzu:

•he was on his way to meet with his bounty officer, Zangei, only to find out he was off on an errand. He waited silently and to his dismay, patiently in the lobby of the old stone building for Zangei’s return

•it’s not until you slip from one of the back rooms and into the waiting area that Kakuzu was glad his officer was out. He was curious as to why someone so dainty and delicate looking (everybody looks breakable to this man, with his power and sheer size) found themselves in this occupation

•when you finally speak, it snaps him out of his own thoughts and curiosity. “You’re waiting to see Zangei right?” You ask, your tone is soft and kind which only makes Kakuzu even more enthralled by you

• “yea” is all he says in response. “Thought so. Follow me to the back” you reply kindly. Holding the door open for the tall masked man to enter through. Kakuzu stares down at you as he follows behind in the corridor

• “Zangei told me that you’d be joining us today and in his absence, has me handling the dirty work.” You explain, smiling over your shoulder. All Kakuzu can do is nod along, already forgetting the reason why he came here.

•over the course of the next hour, Kakuzu trades his bounty with you as you hand him his cash and handle the annoying paperwork. On his way out, you pat him on the back, wishing him safe travels and hopes of seeing him again.

•which of course, Kakuzu is already one step ahead by planning out his next job on the black market, just to come see you.

🏮Itachi:

•you and Itachi had known each other all through out childhood. Meeting up with each other after hours of being at the academy to play around or train

•as the two of you got older, entering your teen years, the friendship remained, but spending time with each other turned scarce as missions were tossed left and right at you, and Itachi had his own troubles

•it wasn’t until the Uchiha clan massacre that separated the two of you for good. At least that’s what you thought. You heard about what happened when you came home late from running an errand for your parents. They told you to never speak his name or to seek him out, which you obliged

•a few years later, shortly after the sudden death of your parents, you decided to search for your long lost best friend. Even if they were alive, you were 18 now, not having to obey their rules

•to no one’s knowledge but your own, you’d been keeping tabs on Itachis whereabouts since that horrendous night. You knew he joined the organization known as the Akatsuki and got info on an upcoming mission he was going to be sent on with his partner

•so naturally, what any non sane person would do, you packed some items and left the hidden leaf. Keeping to the shadows until you spotted him. He knew you were there of course, due to his visual prowess.

•later, while his partner was sleeping in the tent they set up, Itachi slipped away. Joining you on the tree branch you made your bed for the night. “What are you doing out here? It’s not safe.” Are the first words that slip from his lips. “Looking for you of course” you reply quietly. “But why? After what I’ve done” Itachi questions, his tone almost nervous. “Love makes people do crazy things. I think you know that just as well as I do” you explain, a small smile forming on your lips in the darkness.

🏮Kisame:

•you were recently recruited to join the akatsuki as their medical Shinobi. Your skills and advanced knowledge in medical Ninjutsu is what caught Pain, the leaders attention.

•a week into your new home and new life, two members were returning from a rather sketchy and dangerous mission. You knew of one, Itachi Uchiha, but we’re unfamiliar with his partner, Kisame. As they’ve been on the mission from the day before you moved into the compound

•you’ve been in your lab, sterilizing equipment, since you knew the pair was to return sometime today. You’re washing your hands when you heard their voicing coming down the hallway. “Can’t believe the fucker got me” spoke the deep and unfamiliar voice. “It could have been worse” spoke a voice with a much softer tone.

•the door to the lab opened, heavy footsteps followed by nothing? The Uchiha moves silently, you think to yourself as you turn around. Only to be met with two sets of piercing and curious gazes

•your eyes scan the much taller of the two, a visible gash across his ribs, blood seeping from between his large fingers as he applies pressure. You quickly move into action, getting him to lay down on the bed, Itachi stands by the door, watching as you tend to his comrade, and dearest friend

•you’re so caught up in making sure the shark like man known as Kisame, doesn’t bleed out, that you don’t notice the fact his eyes have been on you ever since he walked in

🏮deidara

•you work as a weapons dealer, and armorer. Repairing, replacing, making, and selling the blades you create. You’re widely known through the many villages, being visited daily by many. And a huge part of your profit comes from rogue ninja. Needing someone who they know won’t snitch or turn them in to collect a bounty

•today was one of your much slower days, and you’re sitting on the stool behind the counter, enjoying a quick snack of onigiri when you hear the familiar chime of the door. Your head perks up, pushing your lunch to the side to greet the customer. “Are you here to pick up or are you in need of a custom?” You ask cheerfully

•a gorgeous, blue eyed young man approaches the counter, you take note of his robes. Black, with red clouds. Another member of the akatsuki, an organization you’ve been working closely with for quite some time

• “custom” he replies back evenly. His tone calm, but on the defensive. “Sounds good, I’ll just need you to fill this form out” you reply, a soft smile forming on your face as you slide a paper, as well as a pen across the counter towards him

•you watch in amazement when you see the mouth on the inner side of his palm. “The hell you lookin’ at?” He remarks harshly. You pay no mind to the attitude as you’ve been around many tough individuals

•you shake your head “sorry, I didn’t mean to stare but that’s kinda mesmerizing” you say gently, gesturing to his hand. “Hmph” is all the blonde says, but you don’t miss the look of pride in his eyes as he finishes the form

•after he hands the paper back to you, you go over the usual, how long it’ll take, pick up time, etc. you always have extra weapons in stock so a lot of the custom work people ask for can be done within the hour.

•time passed, and deidara comes back at the time you gave him. His eyes land on you, strands of hair sticking to your face from sweat, the sleeves of your shirt rolled up to your elbows, dirt coating your hands, while a small rag sits on your shoulders. Deidara gets so lost in staring that it takes you nudging him carefully on the arm to hand over his work. He takes the box from you, opening it up. “Looks good, thanks” he says evenly, a faint blush forming on his cheeks as he pays you, before hastily leaving.

🏮Sasori:

•Sasori made his way into the hidden leaf, under a disguise of course. Each month, he sneaks into the village as they have one of the best and most stocked up craft stores

•with how many puppets he makes, he goes through supplies very very quickly, needing to restock every few weeks

•normally, he’s in and out without a hitch. Grabbing the few items he needs right off the shelves, making his way to the cashier, giving exact change before dipping

•today, would of gone smoothly, if one of the tools he needed was actually on the shelf. But to Sasori’s displeasure, he realized he actually needs a worker to ask when they’ll be in stock next so he can return

•he walked around until he spotted you. Currently kneeling in front of an end-cap, stocking glue. You cocked your head up towards him when you heard his voice. You returned his question with a kind smile. “We actually have those in the back, I just haven’t gotten around to putting them on the floor yet. Wait here a second, I’ll grab one”

•Sasori watches as you disappear into a back room, returning with a big smile on your face as you hold the package in your hand.

•something about your kind eyes and genuine smile made sasori feel something he’s only heard about from others. He follows you up to the register where you bag his merchandise and then take his cash

•you wish him safe travels as you know he’s not from the village, since you’ve never seen him before. You’d remember him if he was. As he leaves, Sasori thinks about the next time he’ll visit, even if he has no reason to

🏮Tobi:

•you’re currently on a mission, and have been for two days, eating some of the snacks you brought with you. On the third day, you grew tired of the food you brought, so you decided on stopping at the small dango bar you passed not too long ago

•you come to a stop, turning around and running back in the direction from which you just came. Your stomach rumbling more and more the closer you get. Before you know it, the smell of the dumplings are filling your nose and right when you think you’ll keel over from lack of food, you arrive

•a kind older woman takes your order, she then hands you your correct change.

•no more than ten minutes later, she comes out with a small bowl, the delicious looking food on a skewer. You thank her kindly before deciding to eat closer to the lake, a mere twenty feet away

•as you’re making way to the cozy spot under a tree that you had your eyes on, your body collides with something firm, a yelp coming from whatever you walked into. You glance up and your eyes land on an orange mask.

• “shit I’m sorry. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.” You babble out quickly. Many Shinobi tend to be rude, only because it’s sometimes hard to know who wants to kill you or not. “I-it’s okay” a child like voice stammers out from behind the spiral mask

•luckily for both of you, your food didn’t spill, nor did any of the sauce spill onto his clothes. “Let me buy you something to eat for the inconvenience” your words coming out quickly. The figure before you tilts his head in a playful manner

• “t-that would be amazing. Tha-thank you” he seems just as nervous as you seem to be. You relax a little after you pay for a second helping, handing the man his food. It’s hard to see how he feels about you as his face is covered, even the hole of his mask makes it difficult to see his eye.

•the two of you sit quietly under the tree, both enjoying your food and talking about why you’re out in the middle of nowhere. You purposely look away to give him the privacy to eat his food, knowing that he wears his mask for a reason. Tobi picks up on that and decides a meet up with you a few weeks from now at the same place

🏮Zetsu:

•you decided to skip on going to the flower shop in town, venturing outside the village walls to the huge flower field two miles out. A few months ago, while returning home from a mission, you passed the beautiful field, a mixture of daffodils, poppy’s, clovers, dahlia’s and many more are mixed together in an untouched space

•you never pick them, you find a spot to sit, admiring and smelling the many floral scents

•for as long as you can remember, flowers, and plants in general have always peaked your interests having many books back at home about all the different kinds. The ones that are safe and harmless while others are poisonous and could be deadly is consumed

•you have yet to meet someone with the same interest as you, that is, until this evening

•sketchbook in hand, the lead from your pencil skittering across an empty page as you focus on a stunning blue dahlia, copying its details on the paper. “May I join you?” A voice rings out from ten feet away, causing you to jump slightly

•you peer up, seeing the figure. What catches your attention is the man’s outer layer that looks like a sort of plant. You nod, watching as he slowly approaches you, not wanting to scare you away. Your kunai sits in a holster on your hip, just in case

•over the next hour, you learn the man’s name. Zetsu. You beam when you discover he also enjoys plants, just the same way you do. He researches, reads, and writes about all the plants he sees.

•Zetsu tells you that he comes here every Wednesday, his only off day between his tasks and invites you to hang out with him when you can. He has the idea that after you two become more acquainted and comfortable around each other that he’ll invite you back to the compound. Wanting to show you his works and the sweet little garden he has

🏮Konan & Pain (a couple looking for a third<3)

•they’d spoken about this hundreds of times over the past year. Both wanting another partner, but never finding someone who isn’t just wanting the thrill of a threesome and then bolting through the door(let alone with the two main faces of the akatsuki)

•pain and Konan decided on having a nice little date night at a restaurant in the hidden rain. Wanting to unwind from all their duties with a drink and yummy food

•they both freeze in wonder when you, their waiter/waitress approaches the table. “Good evening” you start cheerfully, your underlying tone calm. You introduce yourself before asking “what can I get you to drink?” After answering, they watch you scribble on your note pad before leaving with a smile

•after you walk away, pain and Konan confirm they both share the same sentiment towards you and plan on the best course of action

•when you return with their drinks, you write down what food they want and once again, disappear to the back of the restaurant. “If you need anything else, feel free to flag me down” you remark with a sweet smile after you place their meals on the table in front of them

•after dropping the bill off, Konan and pain leave. Leaving you an extra hefty tip and a cute message on a napkin. “Here’s our address, we’ll expect a letter soon cutie xoxo, pain & Konan” said the note. You smile and tuck the now folded napkin into your pocket

•

If you made it this far, here’s a big smooch 😘

[ladykissingfish]

Kakuzu: Brat? What’s the matter with you?

Deidara: I … I accidentally went into the bathroom while Konan was getting dressed.

Kakuzu: Tsk. How perverted. You’d better hope she doesn’t catch you because —

Deidara: That doesn’t worry me, hm! Kakuzu … I think she’s sick …

Kakuzu: What do you mean?

Deidara, voice lowered: I saw her … area. D-down there. And … her penis was gone!

Kakuzu: I’m sorry? Her what?!

Deidara: She didn’t have a dick, hm! She just had a … like an opening, where it should be. Do you think it just fell off? I didn’t know they could come off like that! If we find it can you sew it back on for her?!

Kakuzu:

Kakuzu: … have you never seen a naked woman before?

Deidara: No?

Kakuzu: You do realize that different people have different … anatomy, right? That things aren’t the exact same for everyone “down there”?

Deidara:

Kakuzu: Mm. It appears you and I need to have a talk. And by the way, bodies parts in general are not meant to be detachable. That’s very odd and —

Hidan, from the other room: ‘Kuzuuu! My left foot fell off again! Can you come sew it back on?!

Kakuzu:

Kakuzu: Ignore that.

[sanrio-gyal]

The cultural significance of

Akatsuki amvs to “calling all the monsters” or “pokerface”

the Kakuhida and Sasodei “anything you can do” I can do better animatics.

“Akatsuki funny pictures” with the songs hamster dance, witch doctor, and boom boom boom boom.

The yaoi, seme, uke, lemon discourse. The “ukes” randomly ending up in skirts and dresses

The various mpreg Akatsuki fanfics. The Akatsuki fan children.

Kisaita, Sasodei, Kakuhida and tobizet amvs with the “warning yaoi. Don’t like don’t watch.” Or “warning boy x boy. Please no flames”

The Akatsuki cat fics.

Them literally being the tumblr sexy men.

The random “glomps” and Japanese words throughout fanfics.

The skinny black jeans and converse fits in every fanfic.

The Akatsuki high school fics where they were all bad boys and wore hoodies with the cloud on it.

The rock band aus.

The random ocs that somehow always got with Itachi.

The Akatsuki cosplay videos on yt and the awkward cosplays posted on deviantart.

The Akatsuki forums.

The Akatsuki members having to share one bed while traveling.

The end notes where the author would argue with the Akatsuki members.

Naruto joining the Akatsuki. The various fanfics and artwork that had an obsession with collars.

The time where people were confused about Deidara and Konan’s gender, sasori was drawn with white hair, and people thought Tobi was a teenager.

The ships sasori x zetsu, konan x Hidan, Madara x Deidara, Tobi x Zetsu, Itachi x Deidara.

The fangirls and ocs harassing the members and konan being a fujoshi.

The Akatsuki dress up flash games.

Sigh….what a time to be alive