#kinda speaking out loud

[undergiants]

I'm always afraid of scaring off some of my followers/mutuals with my more ns/fw-esque post or reblogs but also I want to make this blog a completely authentic space for myself. Like in the end I don't imagine I'll ever post outright p*rn images or the like (I don't have much interest in doing so to begin with). But I do want a space to express and explore queer eroticism in general without having to censor or withhold my spiritual and religious life either. Obviously two topics that are usually kept far away from one another in modern life but at least in my life are intertwined at many points.

[the-crooked-library]

what I learned from season 2 of IWTV is that a distressingly large amount of people cannot tell the difference between a consensual BDSM dynamic and assault/abuse, nor do they know anything about how kink actually works

it’s not unhealthy for Armand to be submissive or delve into maître/slave kink dynamics. in fact it’s something people do to explore and get past their traumas all the time irl. additionally, he is like five times older and more powerful than Louis, he wasn’t being forced to do anything, nor could Louis ever actually force him. the kink was probably the healthiest aspect of their relationship, what fucked them over was a jumble of commitment issues, a lack of trust, and eventual murder - which is something that would cause problems in any relationship ever, no matter how vanilla.

the Point of the tragedy is that they were on the precipice of something happy, but Louis hesitated for too long and Armand couldn’t recognize when he was loved, and the kink had nothing to do with it, for fuck’s sake. Louis wasn’t abusive and it’s not bad or wrong for Armand to want to be a sub -

[royalarchivist]

[A sad violin song plays over an image of a sad hamster]

Pac: This doesn't have anything to do with me – I wear a blue sweatshirt, you're crazy, this mouse doesn't even have a sweatshirt, this hamster! [Reading chat] Am I a depressed hamster?

[ Transcript continued ↓ ]*

–

Pac: Actually– that's fine! I embrace that idea – of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy? [He hits his desk, then starts counting off people on his fingers] Fit is gone, Richarlyson is gone, Ramon is gone, Bagi and Empanada who were always there when we were there are also gone, I haven't seen them! It's just me and Tubbo, and sometimes Philza shows up.

Pac: I lost Chume Labs, I lost the Favela, I lost Murder Mystery, I lost Ilha Chume Labs, it's crazy! Look at how much I've lost, and I've gained nothing! Of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy?! How am I supposed to be happy?!

Pac: [Reading chat] "You have us Pac," that's true, thank you. No, that's true, sorry.

* NOTE: Please note that this is an incomplete transcript, as I was primarily relying on Aypierre's translation mod at the time and if I am not confident of the translation, I do not include it. As always, please feel free to add on translations or message me corrections.

[shima-draws]

So are we just playing “send Shima quick doodle prompts to shake off the rust”?

In that case, you can never go wrong with toothcup

AUGH...AUGUGHHG...

I haven't drawn them in YEARS thank you for this

Also like. I know initially my idea was that human Toothless could talk regularly like everyone else. But mute Toothless who can sign is also......so good......

This is Perry's fault for poisoning my brain /j

[supermaks]

Ralf schumacher literally just came out and Like idk if this is true but isn't this like the first (ex) driver to come out??? Very big deal and very brave of him to do <33

I think u might be right yeah. Bro there were ‘grid girls’ until like 2018 ?? like cannot be understated how heteronormative and conservative Motorsport as a whole is. If ralf feels like he’s in a safe enough space he can take this step and live his truth completely I think that’s a sigh of relief for plenty others and a kind of hopeful glimpse into a safer more welcoming sports community. Idk if he was a slow or a fast driver or if he has dumb opinions or whatvr the point is that he gets to have that platform in f1 as an out gay man . Love that

[crescentfool]

i love ryomina

no but seriously. even when i’m thinking about other things that captivate my interest, i find myself coming back to them and feeling like i fell down three whole flights of staircases every time i do. they are one of my favorite pairs in media and are very special to me.

it’s the way that ryoji and minato’s lives are inevitably intertwined with each other due to the circumstances 10 years ago on the moonlight bridge. without no minato, there is no ryoji. minato as he is today is because of ryoji. they have irreparably affected each other’s lives that you cannot discuss one without bringing up the other one.

ryoji mochizuki, who is death, pharos, thanatos, nyx avatar, the man of many names and identities, is the perfect summation of p3′s messages and themes.

minato arisato, the wildcard and protagonist, who has boundless kindness in his actions despite the unfortunate cards handed to him.

the two of them complement each other and tell a beautiful story from start to finish.

minato’s personas capture this perfectly. he awakens to orpheus, who’s flames burns bright, is snuffed out by thanatos during the encounter against the arcana magician. a visual precursor of the idea that ryoji stole from the life that minato could have had.

it’s the way that over the course of the game as minato interacts with pharos, talking throughout the dark hour, forging a bond that cannot be broken, that allows ryoji to exist. minato humanizes death.

november. the bells toll, calling the appriser. and yet, it’s peaceful... quiet, and full of life. ryoji, who breaks free from death’s chains, refusing his role, is given the chance to live for a month. to make the most of the humanity that minato has given him over those ten years. and what a life he lived. ryoji’s life is a reflection of what minato’s life could have been like in another universe.

it is the way the two of them are reflections of each other. ryoji with his hair down is just like minato. they are both stubbornly committed to choosing to be kind, to love life, yet are chained down by the cards the narrative dealt them with. they finish each other’s sentences, knowing each other intimately in a way no one else does.

how is that, a boy who lived for only one month, profoundly changes the course of the narrative? he is simultaneously relevant and irrelevant. blink, and you miss it, the beautiful life that he led.

ryoji is horrified at the revelations of being the appriser. he who so desperately wished to forget that his existence was meant to bring the end to all life, was unable to escape the inevitability of death. in a non-human way, of course. he becomes remorseful. a shadow of his brief time as a human who was enamored by the small beautiful things that life had to offer.

he is swallowed by grief. grief knowing that his very existence will take away not only minato’s life, but everyone else’s. the very thing that ryoji loved- life, fundamentally went against the role he was born for- to be the harbinger of death. and unable to grapple with this sadness he believes that the best thing for minato to do is to kill him, so that SEES can live in bliss not knowing about their inevitable end.

SEES is left rattled, calling into question what the meaning of life is and what they do when faced against the inevitability of death.

and!!! minato chooses!! for ryoji to live!! even in spite of what ryoji is MEANT to embody, minato still stubbornly chooses to defy death itself! and if that’s not cool i don’t know what is!! minato wants everyone to have the chance to live!!

so he climbs. he ascends tartarus, to meet ryoji, again, who is now the nyx avatar. and i just think there’s something so so beautiful about being able to use messiah, minato’s ultimate persona, against nyx avatar.

messiah, being the fusion of orpheus and thanatos is peak ryomina to me. because ryoji and minato have established an unbreakable bond from having been entwined for 10 years, minato still has a piece of death with him, and by proxy!! ryoji is able to defy and rebel against nyx trying to bring the fall! and i think that’s fucking cool shit if you ask me!

even when all of the arcanas have been gone through, it’s still not enough to stop the fall. and yet. minato knows. in the way that ryoji was sealed in minato 10 years ago by aigis... minato becomes the great seal so that everyone can live. it comes full circle.

march rolls around. he fulfills his promise to SEES on graduation day. minato dies from exhaustion. but goddamn does his sacrifice make me weep- he’s had such, such a tiring journey. he’s been through so many things because he was at the wrong place at the wrong time. but at the end of it all, he’s reunited with ryoji in death.

and i think this is why ryomina continues to evoke so much emotions for me, to this day. the relationship that they have embodies so much of persona 3′s messages and themes that it makes me feel like a microwave with nothing running in it.

p3′s message is very hopeful, for me. my favorite takeaway from it is that even if death is inevitable, appreciating the life that we were given and choosing to live as best as we can with kindness (even if we can’t feasibly do everything), is just? really nice? and you see this manifest in both ryoji and minato’s personalities and what they do for the other characters.

ryomina just feels so distinct to me, the flavor that their relationship ties back to my favorite takeaways from this game and im just!!  god!! i love you minato arisato! i love you ryoji mochizuki! im so glad that i could meet them! i’m happy that they changed my life! they made me want to appreciate the connections in life even if they were fleeting! they made me!! want to pay attention to the good moments in life and cherish them!

i love ryomina so much!!! i’m so glad that these two could bring so much joy into my life! and i hope that others can have this joy too! 💛💙

[bmpmp3]

and another thing about vocal synth fans: we will always find some adult male voicebank to turn into a funny little clown for our amusement. some guy to communally bully in our talkloids, the miserable straightman to the shenanigans, the sad little freak punchline to our jokes. it happened to kaito. it happened to gakupo. it happened genbu. it even happened a bit to kevin (although he seems to have looped around somehow). and it will happen to you too, frimomen. it will happen to you too.

[gayafsowhat]

Starting to wonder if the reason I was so against dating for so long was bc I was fuckin gay this whole time so ofc boys had 0 temptation to me

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

A Botanical Daughter

historical fantasy

a taxidermist and botanist who live in a greenhouse in a botanical garden, far away from the disapproval of Victorian London

when they receive a shipment of a strange sentient fungi, they cultivate it inside a corpse of a recently murdered girl - who was the best friend/lover of their new housekeeper

as she grows and expands her desires they have to deal with their feelings about the potential monster they’ve created

[multi-lefaiye]

on the note of 'something that makes me actively very upset and uncomfortable but is so specific that asking people to tag for it feels kinda silly to me since i doubt it's something that's gonna come up naturally'

anything about people eating cigarettes. this isn't a joke. that's like one thing that's actively upsetting to me when i see it. calling it a trigger feels a bit strong but yeah that's something that gets to me. even if it's in a jokey way.

i don't tend to ask people to tag for it though because it's like. so specific that i almost *never* see it anyway.

[badolmen]

The ‘vote blue no matter who!’ crowd is starting to get on my nerves. Like, I’m trying not to give away the game, but do they even know that we’re playing?

The point of loudly denouncing Biden and the Democrats NOW is to threaten them into stopping a fucking genocide that’s happening NOW. It is the only (legal) way we can threaten them as their constituents. It’s a game of fucking chicken! If the Dems were legitimately concerned about ceding office to Trump, they would take action NOW to try and recapture voters. But they don’t because they think they can get away with literal genocide and still win the Oval Office because voters like you are too chicken or too paralyzed to make a simple threat.

I don’t give a fuck what you do in the ballot box come November but jfc this is about collective bargaining and you cowards can’t even pretend to give enough of a fuck about a genocide to threaten your reps like??? Grow a fucking spine and do the bare fucking minimum of voicing your solidarity.

[clottedscream]

this is SO kids when all they have in the world is each other-coded. literally SO you’re all that i have-pilled. so found family core

[varjopeura]

.

[safyresky]

Scrimbly Jacqueline 45/52: It's concept Jacqueline, bitches!!

The original description included the following:

Though I've long lost the FIRST draft of Crystal Springs, the original description of Jacqueline lives rent free in my head because WOW she has CHANGED BIG TIME! I keep thinking of this one like "you...the guy she tells you not to worry about" with concept Jacqueline and badass, confident, older, absolutely FERAL Jacqueline as we know and love her these days lmao!

(And after this scrimble last night between 2am and 3am I drew the most feral looking scrimbly proper Jacqueline so if I decide to be a silly later today, I'M READY 😈)

The dress, which hasn't changed too terribly much, being medieval princess inspired

her hair frozen, not as wild, neat and tidy with a little braided crown-esque thing going on with her hair

the sheer bit of material covering the scoopy neck and the like

the icicle bodice, but it's the other way up--the pointy side up!

(which recently was switched to top down after I mentioned it to my housemate ages ago (may have been complaining about how it was hard to draw) and he went "THE ICICLES FACE UP?!?! I thought they went down. Why not try that?" and I did and went "damn. that's a LOT better")

a snowflake belt around the waist/middle of the dress

and a snowflake necklace she always wore! which I changed to a plain old choker bc I didn't wanna think about. Having the necklace be over or under the sheer bit lmao

She was also originally about 1700. THAT'S insane. But that's ALSO because I was 17 and Jacqueline was (and still is tbh) my lil' guy on the inside! Whenever I imagined the story I was putting myself in her shoes, so of course every year as I got older, so did she lmao. When I turned 19 I was like "OKAY. SHE'S IMMORTAL, DANI. SHE'S GOTTA STAY A CERTAIN AGE AT SOME POINT" so we settled on 1900 (though she gives me more 2000 vibes these days), and to compensate I decided that the last two digits of her age would be my age lol. Sometimes you gotta dangle that cake in front of yourself and make compromises, I guess? lol.

She was also originally a little more timid/shy! Which is WILD to me. Y'know those fun arts lmels has done with the OCs? I AM PRETTY SURE THE COMMON FACTOR THAT DRAGS THOSE FOUR TOGETHER IS JACQUELINE, SO PICTURING HER SHY? TIMID? SUBDUED? DOES NOT COMPUTE THESE DAYS!

MAN concept Jacqueline is wildin lol. Also I just realized she was supposed to be next week's scrimbly? ALL GOOD! THIS GIVES ME MORE TIME TO FIGURE OUT HER PIRATE FIT!

[aew-regression-cove]

fuck nausea. fuck mental health issues. and fuck chronic illness 😭 it all sucks!!!

[berrymeter]

why..... am i still awake......... coughs like i dieying