#just silly vampire drama

[moondustinfj]

[montanabohemian]

blocking every fucking idiot on this website that thinks that wwdits queerbait them because nandor and guillermo didn't fuck nasty on the stairs.

YOU'RE ALL FUCKING DUMB.

[stinkrascal]

its kinda surprising how much discourse ive seen in the bg3 fandom over whats essentially people moralizing the decisions other ppl make in rpgs... like thats somehow reflective of ur personality irl. but like thats literally the dumbest thing ive ever heard so why are people taking this idea but pretending like its not the dumbest thing theyve ever heard, truly it blows my mind that anyone runs w this discourse in full sincerity. youre telling me we're not all pointing and laughing rn???

[steampunk-raven]

puppetshades characters my beloved

[seveneyesoup]

you know the other thing is needing dirt from your grave comes up in other vampire stories sometimes but in dracula he’s literally rules lawyering. return to my grave each day? okay, bet. im gonna export my grave dirt to all my secret hideouts so i can go wherever i want

[viasdreams]

Nightwalker ཐི❤︎ཋྀ

'No human blood' is an extremely grueling rule for Donghyuck to live by, his fledgling vampire urges consuming his every thought. Some days, he finds himself struggling to hold onto his humanity, constantly fighting against his insatiable cravings. His human facade slips one night when he passes you, your bloody hand unknowingly guiding his monstrous actions.

or haechan accidentally sucks your blood and drama ensues

pairing: vampire haechan x fem! human reader

genre: social media alternative universe (smau), comedy, fantasy, angst

warnings: slight gore, lots of talk about blood, profanity, sex jokes, jokes about death, actual death (not character death but all the vampires are technically dead) kys/kms jokes

a/n: ahhh my first smau !! is this an excuse to make jokes about that favorite era pic of haechan? YES IT IS !! this will be a very silly story and not like horror/serious just so we're clear, i just liked the black aesthetic lol. ill still be posting one-shot texts so don't worry your pretty little heads :))

status: ongoing !!

taglist: open !!

profiles (1) ~ profiles (2)

01 milkies boy 02 live tweeting his crash out 03 hyuck finally kicking the bucket (written) 04 one wet dream about mark 05 ive read some nasty fanfic about him 06 r u jorking my shit rn?!?! 07 ok throat goat!! (written) 08 bad case of the squirts 09 clock crazy hours on the toilet 10 raises gun to mouth 11 my girl weiner hard rn 12 you're going shit butt 13 NEED one to maul me 14 the hottest of all the smurfs 15 plz shoot me and not with that gun (written) 16 main ingredient in that yummy manwich 17 do you know how to tie a noose? 18 i hope you get roofied every day!! 19 im jisung, your new owner (written) 20 bleeding in my tweak zone 21 especially you anime mfs 22 just lost all desire to cum 23 chugged a thing of toilet bowl cleaner (written) 24 hyuck's unbrushed tongue 25 hot girls stay fartin 26 i wanna know what vamp dick feels like 27 contributing to my spank bank 28 fine ass dad (written) 29 he got you goonin 30 and what if i shaved my gooch 31 my girl looks like a bloody tampon 32 shes worth like six cows 33 that gummy yummy

bonus: who's blood/dick do i have to suck | im not a sexbot, just a guy | yank on their peanits

[annefraid]

me when people in 5 years start saying "wait i didn't know interview with the vampire is actually a fantastic prestige tv drama and not just a silly show with gay vampires like i thought"

[absolutebl]

Best 23 of BL 2023 - Quirky Awards

SHOCK & AWE AWARDS

1. Biggest BL surprise of 2023:

The last 3 months of 2023 in general got my biggest WTF award.

GMMTV fielding OffGun AND TayNew in the same quarter while also airing Last Twilight

That they ALSO optioned 3 JBLs

That there's a high heat omegaverse BL staring Pavel

That there were 20 BLs airing and none of them Korean.

With 5 VAMPIRE BLs announced for next year

But my prize in this category goes to My Dear Gangster Oppa.

It's just crazy:

Thai talent, Korean money + IP (this is adapted from a manwha) airing on a Chinese channel (iQIYI). Plus it was FUN and made smart reuse of a pair who richly deserved it. I'm delighted by the eclectic insanity of this production. And wonder if any other film genre could even do anything like this.

2. The “that country did WHAT?” award:

The 8th Sense from Korea?!

I mean, seriously?! Dealing with mental health, suicide, darkness, therapy, (tiny) age gap, & first time love BUT FROM KOREA? And then openness and casual boyfriend physical affection? What's next? An actual hard fought coming out narrative with an HEA? Gay domesticity and families?

Careful Korea, you'll strain something. Possibly your own culture and film industry.

I should stop having expectations of Korea, they keep surprising me.

Runners up: Korea letting OnlyOneOf do Bump Up Business not to mention that OmegaX thing. AND Korea adapting Why R U? What are you up to, Korea? Qua? Is this a coded message? Should we send help? Do you need snacks?

3. Biggest casting whoa! where did you come from? award:

GeminiFourth in My School President.

Seriously? Babies what? How did GMMTV find you? How do you exist? How is BL this lucky?

4. That studio did WHAT now? award:

GMMTV putting EarthMix into Moonlight Chicken.

And then doubling down with G4 as the damn sides.

Fucking genius.

5. I’m sad you were ignored award:

Destiny Seeker.

It's just a really fun little Thai pulp, the pairs were good, silly dialogue, plus consent and other good sex rep. I enjoyed it. No one talked about it AT ALL.

6. 2023 BL That Actually Made Me Lose My Mind Award?

Laws of Attraction. -The casting, the crazy story, the soapy drama! But specifically: Film playing Charn - the range of his smiles alone. GLORIOUS

I mean I Feel You Linger in the Air also sparked something in me, but LoA drove me actually nuts.

NARRATIVE AWARDS

7. Best story 2023:

La Pluie

I know, you're surprised, right? At the time I didn't chat much about it but I really enjoyed the discourse others were having. I love anything that really examines the fated mates (soulmates) trope and the idea of "the one". What a clever way to do that. (This is one reason UWMA is my favorite Thai BL.)

This one reminded me of the way Color Rush approached allegory and that's no bad thing. Such an impressive little piece.

8. Best narrative structure 2023 award:

Unintentional Love Story.

I know this may seem a simplistic pick. But I love the tidiness of this no frills contemporary romance, how the culture of work and personal ethics and corruption fight against the main character's affection and integrity. Poor baby boy is driven into a corner and then punished for it. But it is punishment he feels he deserves, and so it is up to his (now) ex to figure out what went wrong and why.

It's just great. I love it when no one is stupid or wrong, it's just impossible circumstances and unintentional love deeply felt.

9. Best 2023 dialogue (script) award:

Jun & Jun

Never before has Korea laced a BL with that much perfectly executed innuendo. It was a master class. I didn't know you could be that lascivious in Korean, quite frankly. Plus the way the 2 Juns constantly seamlessly transition between formal register (work, public - where they are boss/employee) to informal register (when they are alone and age mates + childhood sweethearts).

Beautiful to hear and watch.

10. Favorite scene 2023:

The dub con scene in I Cannot Reach You because I AM TRASH for an out of control seme. I'm sorry I just AM.

I have said it before, I will say it again, NO ONE DOES THIRST like Japan. And when that thirst bubbles over, it is heart-clenching and very hot.

11. The most rewatchable BL of 2023 award:

Our Dating Sim

That scene where they lie on the floor + the stolen kiss + giggle? Come on, it should be on comfort repeat in war rooms. It could bring world peace.

ACTORS & CHARACTERS AWARDS

12. Best performance of a queer actor in a leading role, 2023:

Fluke in Make a Wish.

It was fun to see him as an irreverent immortal and while I love OhmFluke I also really enjoyed this new pairing. It was a genuine pleasure to watch.

13. Best pining 2023:

The moot pining in Tokyo in April is...

Boys, seriously? Japan must you destroy us like this? Hurts so good.

14. Best wingman 2023 (The Namgoong Award)

Tiw from My School President

I mean, come on, of course it's him!

(Also can you believe Mark went on from this to do fricking Only Friends!? To Last Twilight! Come on GMMTV GIVE HIM A LEAD!)

15. Biggest OMG I LOVE you boys together, YAY!

Dimpled McMafia & Feral Bunny Foo Foo from Kiseki Dear to Me.

They were feral for each other.

We were feral for them

It was a whole delightful THING.

16. Most unexpected return of a BL pair? award:

The Private Lessons pair showing up in Love Class 2.

I know it was only a cameo, but SERIOUSLY? Thank you SO MUCH Korea! A big studio picking up a Strongberry pairing? I love you.

Seriously tho, Taiwan & Korea tried for ALL THE CAMEOS this year.

17. Well aren't you two just the prettiest? award:

NetJames in Bed Friend.

Need I say more?

18. LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD

Bah Vinh in Vian & Mr Cinderella 2. I didn't like either show but I loved him in them. Especially the make outs.

Yes you have chemistry with all the boys in Vietnam and you kiss beautifully. But it's okay now honey, you have the crown. Relax, you're stressing us out.

RANDOM PICKS

19. Favorite Linguistic Moment of 2023:

Our Dating Sim

Caught in the act by the elevator scene. OMG it's so funny. They're being such boyfriend shits to each other, and to be caught in the act by THAT character, and try to manifest formal language whole cloth? Hilarious.

Honorable mention to War Peanuts in Destiny Seeker.

20. Biggest disappointment of 2023:

You Are Mine

Seriously Taiwan, AGAIN you disappoint me with an Office BL? You're Taiwan, land of offices and suits. This should be YOUR SETTING TO WIN. And yet... argh. I mean it wasn't bad. But it wasn't good either. Stop it Taiwan, do better.

Runners up? Between Us, Chains of Heart, Dangerous Romance - this was a HOTLY contested category.

+ 2 Winners in the sub-category of FUCK YOU FOR THAT ENDING award:

The Director who Buys Me Dinner - I mean this nicely but: you have your lane now Korea, stop hurting us, that's Japan's responsibility and they do it better.

I Feel You Linger In the Air - I'm just hugely disappointed. Thailand ALMOST got its second 10/10 from me, but that damn ending.

Argh.

21. Best Wardrobe/Prop Use 2023

The shower of packaged bedsheets in My Personal Weatherman

Amazing. Brilliant. No notes.

22. Best Queer Rep 2023

Chot in Step By Step

In fact, all the queer characters in this show were treated with great integrity.

AND props to this cast for refusing to do fan service. GOOD FOR YOU! Fuck those sasang wankers.

Runners up? The found family cast of Love in Translation and the Rainbow Rice Cakes in The New Employee.

23. Best Meta Trope call out

Tin Tem Jai

Come on, what a zinger, but at themselves (and Taiwan)

Final question: which of the 23 was the hardest for me to pick?

Honestly? Question #1 this year. But also question #20.

(Last year: 2022's Version) 

Remember I only pull from shows that were completely finished by the end of 2023. Or The Sign probably would have taken multiple categories. But it will fall into 2024 offerings.

(source)

[cherryandsugar]

Hello! I’d like to request a post-game or post-Cazador fic where the reader/Tav takes Astarion on his first real date (or first in 200 yrs anyways). It would be so cute to see Astarion all surprised/excited/flustered to experience something so ‘normal’. Thank you! :)

did it take me 8 months to answer your request? yes. am i sorry? absolutely. will it happen to someone else again? most definitely. either way, i hope you enjoy, this was very fun to write!

Title: You And Him and the Ocean

Pairing: Spawn!Astarion x Reader

WC: 1,133

Warnings: none! all fluff!

Summary: You plan a surprise for Astarion

---

“Keep them closed!” you commanded giddily as you led a bewildered Astarion through the lower city streets, “It’s a surprise!!”

“So you keep reminding me, darling,” Astarion sighed behind you, exasperated by your secretive behavior. His grip on your hand tightened as he felt another slight tug, your excitement palpable. “But you have yet to tell me what this ‘surprise’ of yours is for.”

“Of course, silly, that would ruin it,” you reasoned.

“Well we can’t have that,” Astarion huffed. Despite his seemingly annoyed tone, he kept his eyes dutifully shut at your request, trusting you to guide him to your destination, wherever that may be. Although he may not understand your secrecy, he’ll be damned if he’s the reason your excitement wavers. 

A cool breeze washes over the both of you, ruffling his hair. He has to fight the urge to run his hands through it, to make sure he was still presentable, of course. Faintly, he can hear the distant lapping of waves upon a shore, and he wonders just how far you’ve dragged him from home.

Since the fall of the Nether Brain the two of you had been living in a lovely little flat near the Society of Brilliance in the Lower City. He had insisted you find something more suitable in the Upper City, but you had laughed and said “Sure, my love, as soon as they clear the rubble and rebuild it from the ground up.” He supposed you had a point there. Besides, the Lower City wasn’t awful. The people there were much more familiar with your exploits, having spent most of your journey there, helping people where you could before ultimately saving the entire city. The people were also much more accepting of his vampirism, which was quite difficult to keep secret with the absence of a certain tadpole and the publicity of your groups’ good deeds. People knew him here, or knew of him at least. They accepted him. And you were happy here, having grown up and lived in the Lower City before all of that illithid nonsense.

And he was grateful for your apparent familiarity with these streets as you led him around another corner, never faltering in your guidance. The sounds of (what he assumed to be) the ocean grew louder, and the breeze ever so slightly stronger. The night air is chilly of course, but nothing he’s not used to, not after his lamentable return to the shadows. 

You slow in front of him, stopping for a moment before you speak, “Okay, now be careful, we’re about to go down a few stairs,” you warn.

He’s about to make another quip about your foolishness before he feels you start walking again, slower this time as you descend. He’s slower still, taking his time to find each step before trusting himself to shift his weight.

“Almost there,” you reassure him, “Last one!” and his shoes sink slightly into sand. Right, so definitely the beach, then, he thinks.

“Honestly dearest, whatever it is you can just tell me,” he jests, “There’s no need for all the drama.”

“Hush you,” you respond, “Come along, just a few more steps.” You guide him along the sand until his feet step onto something more solid. “Okay, okay, and… open!” you exclaim.

Finally, he opens his eyes. He was right, standing on the beginning of a short dock he sees the ocean stretch out before him, as if the salt in the air hadn’t already given that away. The clear night sky allows the moonlight to reflect off the shimmering waves. But what’s less obvious to him is what lies directly ahead. Lining the dock are lit candles of every color, leading to a lovely little overwater-gazebo. You, never having dropped his hand, begin to lead him towards it, walking slightly in front of him on the way. He followed soundlessly, taking everything in as you ducked under the roof of the gazebo.

Sitting before him, was a cozy looking blanket, set with two glasses, a bottle of wine and a lovely vase of roses. All around you, lanterns hung from the rafters, illuminating the space in a warm glow. The light seemed to swim in your eyes. You took a seat on the quilt and looked up at him expectantly.

Hesitantly, as if his bones were made of lead, he lowered himself down, still looking to you for assurance, “What is this?” he all but whispered. 

You tilted your head slightly to the side and blinked at his question, Gods you were adorable. “What do you mean?” you half-laughed, “It’s a date! Do you like it?”

If he had to breathe, he’s sure the breath would have been cleared from his chest. All this, for him? The lights, the wine, the romantic setting? Surely it was too good to be true, you were too good to be true. He looked around, almost as if lost, and he noticed a furrow form between your brows, whether from concern or confusion he couldn’t tell.

“You did all this for me?” he breathed, slowly lowering himself to join you on the blanket.

“Of course I did. It’s just wine and a blanket, Astarion. You act like I’ve built you a palace, are you okay?” you finished on a concerned note, reaching out to touch his shoulder.

“Yes, I’m quite alright, it’s just… no one’s ever done something like this for me,” he explained, still looking out over the water.

“Oh,” you hesitated for a moment, “then I guess I’ll need to do things like this for you more often,” you finished with a cheeky smile, taking his hand back into your own and giving it a gentle squeeze.

He squeezed back, turning to lock eyes with you, “Gods, I love you. Have I told you that recently?”

“Hmmm, let me think, only every single day. But, you could tell me once more if you really feel like it,” you joked.

“I love you,” he stated. No frills, no embellishments, just love. Just you and him and the ocean. 

“I love you too,” you replied, closing your eyes and leaning forward for a kiss, which he eagerly supplied. Your lips were soft and light against his own. A slow, lazy thing between two people who had all the time in the world, and no one they’d rather spend it with. You gradually separated, and opened your eyes to meet his. The lantern light sparkled in your eyes. He'd never felt so loved, so valued.

You broke eye contact first, taking the bottle of wine you'd prepared and pouring two glasses.

"Shall we?" you asked, raising your glass.

"We shall," he agreed, lifting his own to clink against yours.

"To the first of many," you toasted.

The first of many indeed.

[juniperdugong]

Make a Prince out of Him

Pairing: Jun x GN!reader Genre: Fluff CW: Very slightly suggestive (not even lol) WC: 394

Day 7 of To Halloween with Love Event

A/N: And when my Manhwa/Manhua obsession starts to show... what then?!

"Umm, love?" Jun's tone was very hesitant as it traveled from your shared bedroom to the living room where you sit impatiently waiting for your man to show off the costume that he let you pick out for him.

"Yes, Junnie!" You were practically bouncing off the wall with excitement. "Need help?"

"No no, I just... I don't know if this one is appropriate for the public, lovely..." He walks out and you're met with such a magical site, nearly drooling as your jaw drops. Jun comes out in a loose-fitting costume resembling traditional men's hanfu but revealing... so much more than it was supposed to be. "It shows my entire upper half... is it supposed to do that? Did we get sent a faulty costume?"

"Mmm... maybe?" And the look on your face does nothing to hide your true intentions. You bought the costume knowing that it would be a bit revealing, you and Jun had even looked over it together before you pressed "buy - But neither of you expected it to be this revealing, and maybe you didn't expect it to look this hot on your handsome boyfriend (what a silly assumption for you to make.)

"What should we do? I mean I can go out like this I gue-"

"NO!" You jump to cut him off, there's no way anyone but you is seeing him looking this good. The fan edits and fansite pictures would be gorgeous... But no! There were just some things that needed to be kept sacred! Sure his fans have seen his body but... not like this and special circumstances call for special measures.

"Junnie... Umm- let's just get you some fangs and some contacts and you go as a vampire this time? Hm?" He turns to you a bit confused but doesn't realize that he causes the robes to flow open as he faces you - Yeah, he's made for acting for sure with the way this scene is straight out of a drama...

"I went as that for Halloween last year though-"

"They won't mind! A different vampire look, maybe we can find something to make it a Jiangshi? A princely Jiangshi?" You're trying to think of anything to put to use the costume you have on deck while also being able to cover him up more, "they'll eat it up anyways... trust me..."

A/N: A Jiangshi is a Chinese hopping vampire for those who don't know! With everything going on in caratland rn I hope everyone's doing alright and that this maybe lifts your spirits a bit! Seriously... it's been going down for the past month WE CANT CATCH A BREAK!

Please Reblog and Comment if you enjoyed ! (They act as power-ups for me)

Taglist (OPEN): @bemybabiibish @bath1lda @porridgesblog

[yanaleese]

hear me out... Karma with a silly incubus/succubus MC? :) but MC doesn't drain Karma of his energy/life when they get freaky

Ok so first of all i attempted to a gender neutral MC here. However the first one looked a little too fem so I did a more masculine look to balance things out! I also don't mean to offend anyone here!

But let's get back to brainstorming together!!! <3333

SO FIRST OF ALL - VERY WHOLESOME. They'd be super cute together!!!

Incubus/Succubus! MC in Karma's world would have a hard time facing discrimination since they're seen as promiscuous, flirtatious, manipulative, dangerous, and useless. Not even werewolves get such bullying and/or harassment compared to these type of demons. It's even worse if sucubi/incubi do not fit the beauty type displayed. I honestly see this MC having a lot of challenges just being themselves, that they put on multiple facades.

Therefore, this MC would be distant upon first interaction, and distrustful of others. I can imagine multiple types of Incubus/Succubus! MCs:

(1) A sly, ‘mean’ MC within the sex industry. Their main job would be (but not limited to) helping wives test their husbands without making them suspicious. But little did the wives know, MCs getting extra money thanks sleeping with these cheaters. When the cheaters are then caught red-handed, MC would taunt them and be like “Oh my gosh? Really? You had a husband???” In the fakest way possible. They enjoy serving karma (👀), since MC couldn’t serve karma due to the abuse and injustice they got growing up. I imagine them meeting Karma when he becomes the new boss of MC’s company, replacing their actually kind, caring boss and best friend they loved to have company with.

While yes, it is a desperate move, he knows it will be worth it. After all, why would vampires, who are welcomed into society - stoop so low for sex work? That would enrage that MC that they’ll look for any and every good reason to tear Karma; cue the haters to lovers arc (lol).

(2) A ‘play dumb’, approachable MC. This MC would use their bright smile in the day doing odd jobs, and use their sex appeal in nightclubs, hostess clubs, strip clubs. As a result, MC either has serious networking or serious drama underneath their belt. To not catch unwanted attention, MC would act like an airhead, cutesy, or just plain innocent like 😇🥺🥹😜🥸🫢. Karma and MC’s first interaction would happen if MC gets framed, blackmailed, and just anything that puts them in danger lol, so basically the Superman option. The other option is the “casual client” scenario, where Karma’s always been their client on the day or night side, until something goes to shit LMAO

(3) The most interesting one here is Incubus/Succubus! MC meeting Dark! Karma. Maybe Karma went on a trip overseas, saw you and boom. Hooked. After that, he does his best to meet you, but under the pretense of keeping your affair a secret with NO sex involved. Realizing you’ve hit jackpot, you think life will be easy. But note that, sometimes the biggest diamond requires the biggest risks - and maaaaaybe that risk will cost your freedom and sanity.

There are so many ideas to come out of this; so feel free to choose which route you wanna go, Anon!!!

[katiethelmie]

Vampire AU

Just some lil ideas on the vampire AU idea and extra messy sketches to get into the Halloween spirit!

Literally just make it The bear but Syd is a vampire in this universe

Having her being a vampire, how? Maybe she’s been a vampire for a long time, traveling around the world being the jack of all trades

Always having her cooking be her best skill

She came back to Chicago cause she wanted to be back home again

Found out one of the favored chefs were also back in Chicago and is now working at the beef looking for a sou, she’s intrigued.

Syds outside of the beef, getting ready to go in as she smells something she recognized when visiting that restaurant in New York all those years ago

Let’s make it like he’s a reincarnation of a reincarnation from a person she’s met throughout her immortal life

A hint of blood orange, tart and a bit sweet. Not too strong but just enough to entice her for her fangs to come out

Standing face to face with Carmen Berzatto, the smell of his blood surrounds her and she gets hungry but she abruptly stops herself

Getting the job, Syd has to suppress her urges and confuse her thoughts that if what she’s feeling is a crush, admiration, or just pure instinct to taste his blood.

Or maybe all of the above?

But then she gets to see how he is while working with him then her anger and confusion arises. He’s not what she thought he was

He calls her too green

Her dish is just “not ready yet chef”

and yet she stays because she wants to improve the restaurant and make a difference to a small place.

Maybe even get to know him better, with the life he has right now

No- Not staying just for him, that be absurd and too weird. Right?

She finally quits but still has lingering feelings and she thinks, “What if I just have a taste, then I can leave and it’ll all be over I’ll be done with him and that restaurant. I don’t have to stay.”

She’s traveled all over the world and yet this one dingy place with this blue eyed mam keeps her here tethered

But does she hate it?

“Why? Why him?”

Looking at him and smelling the hint of blood oranges hits her and she’s hooked again, she came to collect her check but she stayed yet again for him

Sprinkle a lil bit of inner turmoil, with the restaurant renovations and Claire situation. Ya know, angst

And how bout him finding out she is a vampire at the end of S2 after friends and family.

Syd gets really weak after service, throwing up and getting her vampire urges

Desperate, she turns to Carmy since he’s the only one left after being freed from the freezer

“I NEED YOUR FUCKING BLOOD CARMY.”

Finally when she takes a bite, it’s literally life changing, life ALTERING like she can’t get enough and doesn’t think she’ll ever get this again so she savors as much as she can take

Secretly also he likes it, he finally feels calm and things go quiet while feeling safe in her arms

This is where spice ensues, cause he takes her back to his apartment to feed more

Once she wakes up the next morning, the bed is a bit of a mess, blood dry on her lips and chest

But there’s no Carmy

She cleans up and heads straight to the bear, and there he is, with dishes in front of him and a cold demeanor

His aura is completely changed

For S3 they make a little deal between eachother.

Carm is her blood bank and he willingly complies as long as she pushes him and he can push her for the restaurant

He thinks this’ll be the chance for him and syd to finally connect better in a weird fucked up way

While also simultaneously being sort of robotic and detached like he sorta was in S3

Also another way for her to stay with him for as long as she’ll have him

More drama ensues etc. idk I’m not good with writing but it was fun silly idea to get into the Halloween spirit!

[prying-pandora666]

On Alucard and Maria

Are there actually fans advocating for Alucard to be written as Maria’s father figure in the new season of Nocturne? Like that would be a good thing and not infinitely creepier? I don’t think they’ve thought this through.

Alucard is the single most popular character in the franchise. He’s also probably the most shipped character. And yet he has only had one canon love interest in the decades since he’s existed. It’s Maria. And you’re telling me that you think that because he’s 300+ and she’s 17-18 when they started living together in the games, that it would be grooming. However, somehow him inserting himself into her life at age 16 when she’s just lost both her parents wouldn’t come off like grooming!?

Does this man look like he should be picking up random children!? He’s literally terrified of his own cursed blood. Maybe LISTEN TO HIM.

I’m convinced fandoms have forgotten what that word means. Grooming has specific features. It doesn’t just mean “older guy and younger girl.” A relationship with an age gap or an uneven power dynamic can be exploitative or abusive without being a case of grooming. Grooming specifically refers to the process of forming a relationship with a child with the intention of leveraging that relationship and trust to train and prepare (aka brainwash) your victim for the harmful activities the groomer wants to normalize. The relationship Alucard and Maria have in the games is in no way grooming. You know what would be grooming though?

Coming into a 16 year old’s life when she’s vulnerable, traumatized, and recently orphaned only to insinuate yourself as a new father figure. This is so highly inappropriate and a huge red flag. Consider what you’re actually asking for here. These characters do not exist in a a vacuum. They have a long history together as each other’s only canon love interests. You cannot fully extract them from the games, art, interviews, audio dramas, animations, and more where they’re depicted as a couple. There are decades of this precedent and you are asking Netflix to knowingly take the characters with an established romantic dynamic that the audience is already primed to see as romantic and instead portray their meeting as him trying to be her new daddy?

“Oh look! Alucard and his… daughter? Yikes.” This is an official advertisement btw.

THAT is grooming! Think about the optics of this! It would be abysmal! No it would NOT fix the problem of their age gap to make him act like a groomer and get in good with her as a dad. You just cannot completely extract them from the legacy of their relationship in the source materials. It will be incredibly creepy and textbook grooming if you get your way.

Is this really what you want to associate with an “adoptive father Alucard”? Because the art we create doesn’t exist in a vacuum. All the old content—official and fanmade—is still going to exist.

What is so objectionable about the original dynamic anyway? It’s a pretty fun subversion of the tired and problematic vampire trope of “vampire man stalks teen girl and coerces her into being his”. Instead in their original relationship, Maria is the one who pursues Alucard! It’s the young woman who takes initiative and is given the agency to go after what she wants. She courts and woos him. That’s part of the fun!

Yes, Alucard is 300+. He’s also a fictional creature that doesn’t actually exist IRL and stays eternally young. There are no actual people who will ever have his problem of staying 20 forever so it’s rather silly to say he can’t date any humans because of course he will have an age gap with any of them.

The only real problem I have seen people bring up is Maria’s age, but from what I can tell, the show’s already fixed this. Check it out.

In The Games

Rondo of Blood: Maria is 12. She and Alucard do not meet. Richter is a brother-figure and not romantic.

There is then a 5 year time skip.

Symphony of the Night: Maria is 17. She and Alucard meet to save Richter. At the end, Alucard says his goodbyes and intends to return to a life of solitude. Maria goes after him because she has developed feelings for him and doesn’t want him to suffer a life alone.

Maria is given agency to pursue what she wants and prove herself even against Alucard’s resistance and hesitance to let another person into his life.

They spend a year together before we get the audio drama.

Nocturne of Remembrance: Maria continues to try to get close to Alucard. They end up saving each other’s lives and in the end he finally confesses his romantic feelings for her. She is an adult and perfectly able to make her own choices. She chose him. He admits he returns her feelings.

How fandom can look at a story about a young woman subverting the trope and chasing the vampire to get what she wants—basically an anti-Bella Swan—and still find a way to disempower her just so they can pearl clutch? I couldn’t tell you.

So now let’s look at what the show did.

In The Show

Nocturne S1: Maria is 16. She’s been aged up from 12, probably to give her a more active and believable role. But this also means she’s within a normal age to start feeling attraction and expressing her wants. Within her society, she’s even considered of marriageable age. However we are spared the discomfort of our modern values clashing with her contemporaneous ones because Maria in this season isn’t interested in romance. She’s interested in revolution, equality, justice. They’ve portrayed her with so much love and strength. There is no indication they’d betray her by writing her as the child victim of a male suitor. In fact she only meets Alucard in the final few seconds of the season and the two do not even speak a single word to one another.

Now let’s remember the games had a five year time skip. The show only needs two years to get Maria to the adult age of 18, but assuming the follow through with the timeline and go for the full five?

Maria will be 21.

21.

Fan concept for adult Maria. Credit:@esp-art

Are you telling me a 21 year old woman is not old or mature enough to make her own decisions? How is this not a total infantilization of women? Do you think a 21 year old badass vampire hunter needs protection from the ace depressed dhampir boy who just wants to sleep and has in no way tried to pursue her until after she expressed consistent and persistent interest in him?

It is not “grooming” to meet someone when they were younger and then meet them again years later as an adult. That’s a thing that happens! In real life! Adults can still make decisions for themselves! It is only grooming if Alucard behaved in a way that would manipulate teen Maria and put her under his control and authority before she can consent. There is no indication that Alucard in the show is going to do this. And yet the fandom is basically demanding it by saying he should make her “his baby girl”?

And what of Maria’s feelings in all this? She just lost her mother and was betrayed by her father shortly after discovering he even existed. She has lived her whole life without a father. She is in no desperate need of a new one. And if she does need a family member, she already has one! Richter is 19 and is her trusted adoptive brother. Why wouldn’t she go to him over a total stranger she just met and who is half vampire - literally a predator creature that feeds on humans!?

Yeah, hi, Richter Belmont still exists. He and Maria consider each other family. Why would you want her relying on a strange man she just met as a “father figure” rather than her trusted and loving brother?

Have none of you even considered how Maria would feel if Alucard even tried to fill the paternal role? He’d have to force it on her through manipulation and coercion. No way she would want to view him that way. Especially considering she is 16 and likely to be as attracted to the sparkly 20 year old looking sculpted marble beauty as anyone else!

Don’t mind the beautiful eternally young man who looks made of pure porcelain and light. No teen girl has ever been attracted to this, right? No way it could be exploitative and creepy for him to present himself as her new daddy, giving himself authority and influence over her as his child to mold as he wishes, right? Oh yeah, this is MUCH better than Maria pursuing him of her own volition once she becomes an adult, right guys?

We are truly in the stupidest dark timeline.

Frankly, I don’t care if Netflix has them get together or not. They would work just fine as friends too. I just sure as hell hope they’ll ignore the fans clamoring for a creepy daddy/daughter dynamic. Dressing it up as “concern” won’t hide that for some it’s a fetish, and for others they’re just useful idiots who haven’t thought it through.

I implore you to think it through.

[karleksmumskladdkaka]

DIABOLIK LOVERS CHAOS LINEAGE ebten・WonderGOO Tokuten Drama CD: “The Vampire’s Every Day: Board Game Edition ~ Ruki VS Azusa VS Kino ~”

Original Title: DIABOLIK LOVERS CHAOS LINEAGE ebten・WonderGOO特典ドラマCD「ヴァンパイア達の日常ボードゲーム編~ルキVSアズサVSキノ~」

Translation: Here! Huge thanks to @otomehonyaku for her hard work ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝

Audio: Here (CD owned by me). Please do not reupload anywhere.

Starring: Ruki Mukami (CV: Takahiro Sakurai), Azusa Mukami (CV: Daisuke Kishio), Kino (CV: Tomoaki Moaeno)

Plot: Kino downloads a new app based on a board game. As he starts the game, he is suddenly sucked into his phone by a powerful force. Meanwhile, at the Mukami manor, Azusa asks Ruki for help with installing the very same game, resulting in the two of them experiencing the same mishap as Kino. The three boys now find themselves in what they quickly deduce to be the world of the game they were trying to play. Now they must (try) to work together to win the game in order to get back to the real world.

My Thoughts: Below the cut. They are mostly centered around Ruki but honestly what else would you expect from me by this point?

I hope you all enjoy ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝

Anyone who's listened to the other CDs in this board game series will know that they are absolute gold. Particularly the one starring Shuu, Reiji, and Subaru. Truly Dialovers crack at its finest.

While I don't consider this CD to be as funny as the one I just mentioned, nor as funny as a lot of the other silly ones in general tbh, I still had a good time listening to it, and genuinely laughed at some points throughout. And ultimately that is what I wanted to get out of the CD in the first place, so I have no complaints. Hopefully it got – or if you haven't listened to it yet, gets – at least one laugh out of you as well!

(Spoiler-ish thoughts below)

I found the dynamic between Ruki and Kino to be pretty entertaining. These two do NOT get along, as to be expected with how clashing their personalities are and how their previous interactions have gone. They piss each other off pretty consistently in this CD, even focusing on arguing with each other while facing an active threat. I enjoyed their bickering and digs at each other but I did feel bad for poor Azusa who just wants everyone to be friends and also y'know deal with aforementioned threat. I'd probably say that he acts the most mature here, most of the time anyway.

Speaking of Azusa the interactions between him and Ruki are also great but for the exact opposite reason. Their relationship is so wholesome and sweet, and it's so obvious that Ruki has a soft spot for his baby brother (which Azusa does try to take some advantage of near the end lol).

The highlight of the CD though for me is when Ruki tries to capture the golden rabbit by telling it in the sternest most commanding tone of voice to jump into his arms. Sakurai's delivery here is Perfect (what else is new tho) and made even better by the fact that it's directed at a literal rabbit. I also love how genuinely puzzled Ruki is that his foolproof tactic fails. Stellar stuff that honestly made this CD 100% worth buying.

It does feel as though - in true silly tokuten fashion - Ruki's IQ has dropped a few digits, but it doesn't bother me much in the context of these CDs. After all they're not meant to be taken seriously, but rather for the listener to simply enjoy the chaos and absurdity.

[madelynhimegami]

Satan Guide

(to the anon that requested Maguro, he's next)

Satan's full title is "The Dark Prince Satan." Some apparently aren't aware that he's called the Dark Prince in Japanese as well, so I'm mentioning it.

Likewise, as funny as the "devil from Bible" jokes are, it's just his name.

You know how some people will use the term "dracula" for vampires? It's the same idea here but for demon lords (shoutouts to Gadget).

As for Satan himself, at his core he is dramatic and full of himself. He's also prone to boredom.

He's far and away the most powerful character in the franchise, hands down.

The above two points are closely linked: When you're the most powerful being in existence, it's too easy to just do what you want without consequence.

Hence the other key point of Satan's character, that he is a massive doofus.

He does stupid things on purpose while limiting his power because it creates conflict he's not immediately set to win. This allows for both drama and uncertainty.

That isn't to say he's just playing the fool and is just distracting everyone else. He really is a dumbass, he just also has an off switch for the silliness when the situation calls for it.

Whether Satan's hamming it up, or resembling a wet sock, or gushing over "Carbunny," or does something patently stupid, or behaving childishly, or displaying a fragile ego… that's not a front. That's raw, unfiltered Satan.

Satan's not really evil. He doesn't look for more power, or seek to rule the world, and isn't really into corrpting mortals into doing his bidding, let alone killing them. Guy just happens to be the Prince of Darkness.

Before continuing down this line of thought, let's take a moment to address the elephant in the room that is his relationship with Arle (and by extension Rulue, Schezo, and Carbuncle).

By the time that Madou 2 happened, Satan had become quite lonely, leading to his setting up a find-a-spouse dungeon with himself at the bottom.

It didn't work, since the first qualified person to reach him beat him up ("I shouldn't've skipped breakfast") and took his rabbit with her.

Over the next several games, Satan got the message that Arle was just flat-out not interested in marrying him.

Which was fine. The shenanigans that happened among him, Arle, Rulue, and Schezo led to the four of them becoming friends (for a given definition of "friend," in a few cases), so he's not lonely anymore.

That said, he's still committed to the bit of pursuing Arle without so much as telling her it even is a bit at this point.

Either Satan is unconvinced that his friendship dynamic with her works without him being obnoxious, or he just doesn't want to rock the boat for whatever reason.

Once, his request to marry Arle was accompanied by a Yes/No prompt. Choosing yes has Satan self-sabotage by pleading "Say it again!" until "No" is selected.

Another time, Arle had some memory problems, and actually believed Satan when he claimed that they were engaged. Satan's immediate response was "Uh, Arle? Are you feeling okay?" He then proceeded to drop the bit until Arle got her memory back.

All the same, his affection for Arle is genuine-- though whether it's still romantic, I couldn't tell you.

As for Rulue, he almost certainly appreciates her as a friend, but would prefer her to back off. Not that he can say so, let alone explain why, without breaking kayfabe.

Schezo, Satan is aware, doesn't particularly like him, but does trust him very deep down. That won't stop him from insulting and/or challenging Satan when they cross paths. Satan just plays along because that's also fun for him.

Carbuncle is adorable and Satan delights in showering him in attention when he gets the chance. Carbuncle probably thinks he has the most cringe parent in all the worlds.

Despite his tendency for chaos, Satan is generally against letting things get so out of control that people start getting seriously hurt, let alone become life-threatening.

In addition, he has nothing but respect for the freedom of others, and so will never try to coerce them, abduct them, or otherwise attempt to control them.

Of course, his penchance for shenanigans means that many will assume his involvement in the chaos of the day. They don't trust him to not be involved.

Really, all bets are off until he's confirmed or denied his involvement.

But back to the point. Satan doesn't go out of his way to cause (direct) harm to people, and he respects the free will of others.

So while he could solve most conflicts he's around for, he typically won't do so proactively, just because it would mean committing life-changing (or ending) violence, as well as deprive others involved of making a choice.

When presenting solutions, his method seems to be to first suggest the absolute least desireable one (ie, killing Squares, putting Sig into eternal sleep). Which is actually a useful strategy in giving less extreme solutions a better sense of scale (or so I heard?)

All bets are off if he has any reason to believe Arle and/or especially Carbuncle are in serious trouble.

As previously stated, Satan typically keeps his vast power in check. Manifesting his true abilities causes strain to the surroundings. The general area may start exploding and/or the fabric of reality itself may start to deteriorate.

While Satan generally sports a masculine presentation, he doesn't have a whole lot of regard for gender. He has a bikini for his own personal use, and once expressed desire to be a distressed damsel/princess that gets saved by a hero (read: Arle). And then there's Satan Saturn.

He is over 100,000 years old, he probably existed before humans even had cultural perceptions of gender.

If forced to label him, I'd say Satan is genderfluid.

Speaking of his age, while Satan physically resembles a 20-something-year-old adult (by his choice, as he can shapeshift), he gives off elderly vibes that a lot of people pick up on easily. He is referred to as an "old man" or some variant with surprising frequency.

He does not like this. So naturally, Ecolo has taken to calling him "gramps" on purpose.

[silverofthunder]

☆ body and blood ☆

🔻DRACOPIA SERIES 🔻

Papa Emeritus IV x GN Reader

summary: One night Reader meets a mysterious man at the cemetery and there forms an instant connection that is not easy to understand but they both embrace it.

content: 37.8k words || mystery (kind of), drama, fantasy, vampires, family stuff, romance, fluff, mentions of blood and killing, angst, hurt/comfort, friendship, some humor, SFW/NSFW...

parts:

watcher in the night (2.6k)

hunter's moon (3.1k)

heart's desires (2.6k)

(the beauty of) your world (2.8k)

the greatest temptation (2.9k)

downfall (2.6k)

a thought of forever (2.8k)

of decisions and right moments (2.8k)

bliss and fear (3k)

shadow of the past (2.8k)

confessions (2.6k)

where i belong (2.7k)

life eternal (3.8k)

➡️ also on AO3

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finished on 29/08/2024

Wow, I did it. I really did it. I wrote a proper length, multichapter fic and finished it. This is a huge achievement for me, honestly, as long stories have never been my strongest suit. But I’m so proud of myself that I managed to keep this together at least some way. This is far from perfect but I think that this still might be my best work of all so far. This was supposed to be only a few chapter long thing, originally, but then everything got out of hand and then I noticed that the story really pulled me in and now we are here, 13 chapters later. This was supposed to be just a silly, little thing but grew to be so much more. It took a bit over 5 months to get here but I’m impressed how fast I really did this. Writing this has been an amazing, challenging and instructive experience. While I loved writing this, this also proved why I haven’t written anything this long before. It requires so much work so that you can keep everything together and not forget anything important. But I’m so happy I did this, went with the flow and saw how this turned out. Lastly, I want to thank all those who have read this, left kudos or comments (liked or reblogged this). Those mean so much. ♥