#jesper loves protective wylan

[shit-people-probably-didnt-say]

Jesper: I swear on my life-

Kaz: Ive seen your life, swear on something valuable

Wylan: EXCUSE YOU MOTHERFU-

[thesevenumbrellas]

Seeing a lot of autistic Wylan essays on here and now I’m realizing why the fandom has dubbed him the child and why it’s making me so uncomfortable

[l0st-in-time]

Happy belated shadow & bone day !

Please enjoy my somewhat rough wesper drawing *inspired* by season II

This is just my silly interpretation :)

[fulltimeviking]

pov i am watching shadow and bone season 2

[dragonqueenstormwitch]

to be loved is to be seen

and it’s kaz choosing a ship for inej that he thinks suits her

it’s mal knowing alina loves the blue irises, not the white ones

it’s jesper memorizing wylan’s face and telling genya how to tailor him back

it’s david keeping a list of all the ways genya likes to be complimented

it’s nikolai designing a structure to protect zoya’s garden and promising to always make it summer for her

[barrel-crow-n]

I was just thinking about how Kaz built this heartless persona for himself and how everyone falls for it to varying degrees: He's widely regarded as a monster and as "not made right"; Inej thought he wouldn't come for her and that once she was useless to him that he would discard her; Jesper never knows where exactly he stands with him; Nina "doesn't want to know what dark hole he crawled out of"; Wylan calls him "the most vengeful creature he had ever met"; Matthias believes he's a demon. But in reality his true motives for most things are love and grief and loss of family.

Kaz only wanted money for revenge, he didn't want to try and build a meaningful connection with Imogen because she would distract him from pursuing his vengeance, he only mentions how Pekka conned them out of money to explain how they ended up on the streets, how it was never about the money but about Jordie.

Kaz says that he and Jordie were such easy marks because they missed their dad. Kaz's biggest gripe was not just the loss of Jordie but the illusion of a home and family that Pekka had snatched away before the plague snatched Jordie away too.

It all always leads back to Jordie and his loss and avenging him and about never wanting to be that vulnerable again. Kaz created Kaz Brekker to protect himself, to hide his vulnerabilities. His grief is hidden behind a fake name, his naivety is hidden behind violence, his touch aversion is hidden behind the gloves.

Kaz pushes people away because he fears what will happen if he lets them in. He gets mean when he's vulnerable to hide said vulnerability. He did it in the clocktower, he did it in the bathroom. After he accidently calls Jesper Jordie he lashes out verbally and physically, when Inej asks about Jordie and Pekka's involvement in what happened he recounts how he tortured someone. In both incidents it's again Jordie that he's hiding, that is causing him to be vulnerable. It always leads back to Jordie. Even with Van Eck! He's again angry that he fell for what he fell for before, the thing that made him lose Jordie making him temporarily lose Inej.

In both the Jesper and Inej examples he hides behind violence - by brawling with Jesper and recounting a time when he tortured a young boy. He does this because he loves Inej and Jesper, and it scares him, and he doesn't know what to do with it. Because everyone he's ever loved has died in horrible ways (his father was torn apart by a plough, his brother died from a horrible sickness) and he doesn't want to go through it again - especially since he still hasn't let go of Jordie, although it has been eight years.

Kaz is a person who loves so deeply. Who is mainly motivated by love. Who, when Pekka asks him what he wants, replies "Bring my brother back from the dead." because he never cared about money, nor power, nor anything else. He just wants his brother. All he wanted this whole time is his brother, and since he no longer has him he lashes out, all hurt and grieving. He's hurting so badly that he destroys everyone even mildly involved in what took Jordie away from him. But he only did that because he loved Jordie. It wasn't revenge for the sake of money it was for the sake of love. It was for the sake of Jordie.

Kaz loved Jordie so much that he became the most feared person in Ketterdam, that he took down the King of the Barrel and a merchant from one of the oldest families in Ketterdam (because even if his gripe with Van Eck was unrelated, it's because of Jordie's loss that life snowballed into their interactions and the consequent betrayal and destruction of everything Van Eck held dear). Kaz loved Jordie so much that it changed the entire course of the narrative.

If not for Jordie's loss the heist wouldn't of happened, all of the Crows lives would've been different, some of the Crows would even most likely be dead, and this extends even further to much more major things. The King of Ravka managed to steal the titanium because of his help which will aid Ravka in wars, the path to jurda parem is no longer in the hands of the Fjerdans and a cure is being safely developed in Ravka because Kaz rescued Kuwei, Wylan took over the Van Eck empire because Kaz tampered with Van Eck's will and papers, Inej is working on taking down the slave trade which is only possible because Kaz freed her from her indenture, Nina became the queen of Fjerda because of things that Kaz started (her joining the Dregs instead of being indebted to the Dime Lions, him freeing Matthias, him organising the heist, Matthias dying in the aftermath, her going to Fjerda to bury Matthias and the results which ended up being her and her new lover on the Fjerdan throne trying to fix prejudice against grisha, and women, in the most conservative country).

All of it leads back to Kaz. And he did all of it for Jordie. It all always leads back to Jordie. Jordie and Kaz's love for his big brother and his grief over having him snatched away from him.

[undiscovered-horizon]

"Four Crow Investigation II: Lovebirds' Outfox" - Kaz Brekker x Reader

[Four Crow Investigation]

☽ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ☾

Enjoying my work? You can leave me a tip on Ko-Fi

SUMMARY: Nina and the rest of "crow-vestigators" are not as inconspicuous as they think. Being a little too spiteful for your own good, Kaz and you string them along. What the amateur detectives consider "evidence" of an affair is actually a well-thought-out scenario.

WORDCOUNT: ~ 2.1k

>>Grishaverse-inspired playlist&lt;<

You stare with amusement as Wylan, Jesper, Inej and Nina are sitting around the table in a hardly inconspicuous manner. They’re leaning so close to each other, their bodies are covering their faces but you don’t need to read their lips or expressions to know exactly what they’re talking about. Meaningful glances, small nudges, animated whispering - none of that escaped your attention.

Then, you feel Kaz squeezing your hand in an attempt to shift your focus from the gossiping friends back to him. His eyebrows are slightly raised in a silent question.

"Do you think they know that we know that they know?" you ask, cringing at the word salad filled with repetitions.

"No," Kaz answers without hesitation. "Considering how long it took them to notice something so obvious, their observation skills are more underwhelming than I had originally thought."

The two of you glance towards your friends once more, left to only guess what tall tales they were making up. Observation skills, Kaz’s voice resounds in your head. Yes, they are good at noticing things they are desperately looking for, so, maybe, if they are looking for crumbs…

"Actually, I have an idea,” you begin in a hushed tone.  Kaz turns to look at you, his expression hardens the moment he notices your mischievous grin. “Up for a bit of roleplay?"

It’s been a wild week for the four Crows. They sat down at a corner table, across the club from you and Kaz talking about something by the bar counter. Absorbed by the conversation, you’re pouring a drink in a record-long time. Your hand hovers above the rum bottle as you’re closely listening to Kaz saying something. Then, to the surprise of the gossip club, you erupt in laughter.

Jesper frowns. “I’m telling you, there’s two of them. She gets the nice Kaz, we get the mean one.”

“No, the mean Kaz is still inside,” Inej refutes. “The nice one is making an effort to bury him but he’s definitely in there. Saw it myself.”

He turns back towards the group. Jesper puts his finger up in a warning gesture and speaks slowly: “Do not tell me Kaz Brekker is a knight in shining armour because there is no way I’m treating that as anything but a bad joke. I’m barely believing the stuff I’ve seen with my own two eyes.”

“N-no, there is some truth to that,” Wylan interjects. “I didn’t see him get angry,” he quickly adds, ”just… strangely protective.”

“So we can agree,” Nina says with expected giddiness, “there is passion in the perpetually grim Kaz Brekker.”

Jesper squints his eyes with suspicion. “I hate the fact that you used passion and Kaz in the same sentence but at the same time I’m curious why.”

“Oh, you’re going to love it!” She taps the table excitedly. “I’ll go first.”

╚ Nina’s Evidence ╝

You’re pacing around the office, jumping from one leg to another, shaking and fidgeting as much as you can without making much noise. While preparing to fool the Heartrender’s power, you’re ensuring that you look the part:

“Is this obscene enough?” you ask unbuttoning your shirt further. Tugging at your clothing, you’re making yourself look even more disheveled. Even the smallest sound outside the office door makes you jump as you’re impatiently waiting for a certain creek of one of the steps.

Kaz doesn’t answer. His watchful eyes are following your movements as he’s focusing on keeping his attention on the task at hand. That bright mind of his, however, fights relentlessly to memorize your unkempt look instead.

Not hearing him respond to your question, you turn around to look at Kaz. Leaning against the desk, he’s just staring at you with a quite inexplicable intensity. His unspoken passion is only making the voice in the back of your head louder: what if it was Him undoing my shirt?

But you stifle this thought. It’s not the time for this. Searching for distraction, you look at Kaz’s collar - the first two buttons are undone but they make him appear more sleepy rather than caught red handed at a moment of weakness.

“May I?” you ask, gesturing towards his garment.

“Go ahead,” he quietly answers. There’s a lot of trust in his lack of movement and calmness about your closeness.

Carefully, you grab the hem of his collar and open his shirt further, while making sure your fingers do not even graze the bare skin underneath, despite the urge sitting deep inside your abdomen. Then, you take a step back, examining his general state and whether it sets a believable scene. A proud smile creeps onto your face.

“You’re really enjoying this,” Kaz states.

“Actually,” you say as you lean against the table, fairly unaware that because of your disheveled clothing your cleavage is significantly more visible, “I’d be enjoying this little scheme a lot more if we were in fact being scandalous.”

Whether that was your objective or not, Kaz’s heartbeat picks up noticeably, his rogue mind flashing explicit images before his eyes.

A creek of stairs.

You and Kaz give each other a meaningful glance and you push the paperweight off the desk, knowing that Nina can hear it. The door swings open and you’re immediately in character, looking away with the most embarrassed expression you could muster.

Kaz clears his throat. “Is there a reason why you’re barging in?”

Nina looks a bit lost, still piecing together what she might have just interrupted. “I… uhm… I talked with Lizzie Hardy. She’s in, we can count on her.”

“Understood,” he says in a low, firm voice. “Now go. And learn to knock.”

A half-grin enters her face as she gets rid of any doubts as to what the two of you had been presumably occupied with before she entered. With a skip to her step, Nina throws a “You bet I will!” before leaving the office. She’s quite sure no one will have a better gossip than her.

╚ Wylan’s Evidence ╝

Wylan is startled by your yelp of pain, almost dropping the delicate vial in his hands. His focus immediately shifts to you, who is now frowning with your hand raised slightly above your head. A string of curses leaves your mouth as you check the wound again - yes, still there and still bleeding.

Right, bleeding.

“Are you okay?” he asks in a worried tone. Part of you feels guilty for fooling Wylan because of the sheepiness he wears most of the time but, on the other hand, he is part of the gossip girl club. This little scheme is just a consequence of his choice.

“Yeah, no problem. I’m a big girl, I’ll just wrap this and I’ll be fine,” you answer casually.

Pretending to look for something that can work as a bandage, you’re praying that Wylan can’t smell the cranberry preserve slowly dripping down your forearm. There’s an urge deep inside you to lick the jam, almost tasting the sweet and sour fruit in your imagination.

Kaz, who was waiting for the well-played-out yelp, rushes into the room with a grim expression. The moment he’s supposed to notice your injury, he makes a show of dropping his shoulders. He’s not saying anything, only giving short sighs and annoyed grunts as he reaches for a random rag laying around. 

“I’d advise against cutting off your fingers,” he says loud enough for Wylan to hear as he’s tightening the wrapped rag around your palm. "You need to be more ca-" Kaz cuts himself off, suddenly realizing he was about to use an off-limits word. "You need to pay attention to what you're doing."

Looking over Kaz’s shoulder, you see Wylan nervously glancing at the two of you out of the corner of his eyes. Jesper is going to hear world-shattering news in the next hour - on that you can safely bet any number of limbs.

╚ Jesper’s Evidence ╝

Too busy retelling what he had learned while following Lizzie Hardy, Jesper doesn’t notice the tiny signal you give Kaz while the three of you are walking through the streets of Ketterdam.

Air, cobblestone, a lost dog - it doesn’t matter. You stumble over something but ever watchful Kaz manages to grab you by the waist, preventing you from falling. To be honest, until this moment you weren’t completely sure this is going to work out because you never practiced this with Kaz. Well, you did, once, but the two of you got significantly distracted early on. So the plan to outfox Nosy Jesper was a leap of faith - literally and figuratively.

Jesper, the man in question, halted his story as he’s watching the unbelievable occurrence of Kaz having a caring reflex. For a moment he considers whether this wasn’t some kind of miraculous coincidence but on the other hand, the movement looked so natural and purposeful that it simply had to be deliberate.

Standing on your own, you look towards Jesper, who’s still staring at you and Kaz with furrowed eyebrows and his mouth slightly agape. “You were saying?” you coax him to continue as though nothing happened.

“Yes, right, the thing,” he stutters out as he’s trying to remember what he was talking about before seeing something so strange he’s questioning his own sanity.

╚ Inej’s Evidence ╝

Due to the late hour, or rather an hour so late it can be considered early, the club is deserted except for you and Kaz sitting by the bar. He’s silently watching your profile as you’re applying another layer of theatrical paint and makeup.

“Does it look realistic?” you ask for the hundredth time while examining the bruise in a small hand-held mirror.

“It’s good enough.”

You set down the mirror and look at him. To a degree, you know he won’t agree to your proposition but you try anyway, just to make sure:

“Maybe you could hit me?” you suggest. His expression grows colder. “Just for good measure. To really sell this,” you add in your own defense, as though there is a possibility of him retaliating for such a ridiculous proposition. Even when furious beyond imagination, you’ve heard him yell exactly once out of anger.

He leans closer towards you. Paradoxically, it’s you who is uncomfortable with the sudden intimacy but maybe the uneasiness is not due to the proximity but the chilling tension that has sprouted between the two of you. Kaz studies your expression for a moment, his jaw relaxes and clenches over and over again as he’s clearly pondering the earthiest way he can put his thoughts into words.

“I will never raise my hand against you,” his voice is quiet and wavering with emotions, “even if my life depends on it. So don’t ask again. Ever.”

Suddenly, you feel strangely small next to him as though Kaz is but a shadow that quickly grows larger as candlelight dims. “Right, sorry,” you answer awkwardly.

The door to the club opens with a creek and the nervous conversation has to be cut short. You cover your face with hands, having rubbed some chili seeds into your palms earlier. As the capsaicin reaches your nostrils and eyes, forcing yourself to cry is easier than ever. Pretending to be agonizing over something, you keep reminding yourself not to actually touch your eyes or nose.

You can’t see her face but you’re sure Inej is wearing a worried or confused expression and you’re quite correct in your guess - she walks towards you and Kaz with apprehension as though she’s still wondering whether she wants to intrude. Inej momentarily grows anxious, noticing the vibrant bruise on the side of your face.

Then, in a truly dramatic fashion, Kaz gets up from the bar stool and storms out of the club as you had agreed beforehand. While he’s passing Inej, she calls out to him:

“Kaz-”

But he’s quick to cut her off in a harsh voice:

“Not now, Inej.”

The door closes behind him with a slam and considering the state of the two of you, she prefers not to ask questions. It will be easier to sleep at night.

“They’re staring,” you inform Kaz while pouring him a drink.

“As far as I know, they have a reason to,” he answers, taking a sip of the beverage. His eyes are boring into you like his trying to look past your skin and bones, into your mind if not your very soul.

A wide smile brightens your face. You lean on the counter, face close to Kaz’s. Although it’s been some time, it still makes your heart flutter that he doesn’t move away. Perhaps it’s just his unreadable expression or maybe he really is unbothered by the proximity.

“To be honest, I enjoyed our little theatrics.” Smiling at him, your teeth glisten in the dim light inside the club.

“You make an impressive con artist, I have to admit.”

“Ah, forget the con part,” you wave your hand in dismissal. “It was entertaining, alright, but the best part was just spending time with you.”

Kaz almost chokes on his drink.

____ @moonstruckpoet @shara-ne @queenkalico

[jkriordanverse]

soc but we don't really talk about the ways the characters grieve over matthias's death much so i'm doing it.

Note: since @clarissaweasley-10 is still grieving i thought i'd make this to soften the blow

Kaz - This guy lost one of his crows. They were supposed to be under his care, he was supposed to protect them. They were all supposed to make it. But they didn't. And it scares him because what if it hadn't been Matthias but Inej, or Jesper, or Wylan, or hell, even Nina. This is Jordie all over again, he let someone get a bit too close and now they're gone...it hurts. My personal hc is that he doesn't really allow himself to grieve, and chooses instead to overwork himself until finally Inej confronts him and tells him it's okay to miss Matthias.

Inej - It upsets her that he died, given their situations were so similar to each other, both having their families taken away from them at a young age, then going into something that wasn't good. But Matthias, he had his whole life ahead of him. I mean, Inej wasn't sure what she was going to do after Kaz and the heists and all of that, but Matthias was going to settle down with Nina, and then all this happened. And it's just wrong that he was taken away so early and maybe the gods she believed in hadn't been so giving as she thoguht they were. But overall I think she'd be the first to make peace with it.

Wylan - It scares him. I mean, from his time with Van Eck leading up towards his incident in the canal, he's been on edge at the thought of death and he might die alone, too. But now he's with his friends, and his life is going great, and he has what could possibly be the love of his life, he feels invincible and it was perfect. But then Matthias died and hell, he wasn't even really there when it happened. and it wasn't perfect anymore, and it reminds him that maybe life is more fragile than he remembered.

Jesper - It haunts him like it haunts Nina. I mean, what if he had been the one who took parem instead, then maybe, just maybe, Nina would've still had her powers and might've been able to heal Matthias back, or at least control his blood pressure to a stable level until Kaz got a healer. I think like Inej, he knows that Mattthias had his whole life ahead of him, and it kinda gives him the thought that maybe he should've been the one who died instead of Matthias. or he should've been there, maybe his Grisha powers could'ved deflected the bullet elsewhere, there were endless possibilities. It haunts him, and he never really gets over it, even though he acts like he has.

[ashessonfire]

Part two of 'Intruder' <3

'Intruder' Kaz Brekker x Reader (part 2)

Prompt - A few months had passed since you stumbled into the crow club, leaving the crows curious as to who they were. How will the crows react to the most vulnerable secret of Kaz Brekker finally being revealed?

- Pairing: Kaz Brekker x Civilian!Reader (Gender neutral) - Warnings: none? again just Kaz being soft, some mentions of the break in but literally PURE FLUFF

A/N: Once again i am incredibly grateful for all the love and support, and hopefully i have done justice with this part two! it can be read as a stand alone, some of the context will be confusing, but hopefully still just as cute! if you haven't read the first part, you can find it here!!

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A couple of months had passed since your less than ideal first meeting with the crows. Since that frantic day, your locks had been switched to the latest designs, being inspected thoroughly by your lover until even he, the master of his trade, struggled to crack them.

Although you were still paranoid beyond belief each time you turned the key to your home, the knowledge that Kaz had thoroughly ensured your protection settled the nerves fluttering in your chest. Frequent visits from your husband weren’t unusual, often slipping away from his desk during the earliest hours to bask in your company, allowing you to bathe him with love and affection, something he had slowly accepted and found he thoroughly enjoyed, only on one condition.

It had to be from you.

But since that night, he came over more frequently, stopping off after heists with gifts he had ‘bought’, or dropping in to work on blueprints, stating that there was too much paper cluttering the desk in his usual space, making you smile at his blatant lies just to be closer to you.

════ ∘◦ᵒ 𓅓 ᵒ◦∘ ════

Kaz vigorously battled with his mind on the night you visited the crow club, having to repress his heart's wishes to stay with you, for your safety, and his peace of mind.

However, he dragged himself back, leg stiffening in the frigid air, sending sharp bolts of pain through to his bone. Yet that wasn’t what plagued the man as he limped back to the slat. What haunted him most was the idea that he would have to confront his crows about his one true weakness.

Evidently being you.

Kaz demanded each crow's presence, ordering them to his office as soon as the sun began to slowly bleed its light into the impenetrable darkness of Ketterdam. Once they were situated in the cramped room, he hardened his gaze and lowered his voice, morphing it into a deadly tone.

“I am aware that last night may have surprised you, however you are not to speak a word of it to anyone. Not to dregs, customers, or civilians. Do I make myself clear?” Kaz bit out, leading Jesper to swallow thickly, Nina to shift her gaze to the condensation on the windowpane, and Inej and Wylan to both find wonderfully interesting specks of dirt on the panels of the floor.

The crows remained true to their word, still in awe at the mysterious figure who seemed to have tamed the Bastard of the Barrel, but far more scared of the consequences that may come with disobeying their boss’s order. However, Kaz had made a grave mistake with his command, demanding your existence to remain unbeknownst to the dregs, but never specifying that they were forbidden from discussing you with each other.

You became somewhat of a legend amongst the crows, appearing frequently in gossip which they housed in their cramped rooms at the slat, waiting for the clicking sound of a cane and heavy footsteps to disappear into their owner’s office to begin discussion.

“How long do you reckon they've been together for? I mean, I have never seen Kaz holding anyone’s hand before,” Nina mumbled through a mouthful of pastry, whilst wearing a highly quizzical look.

Jesper smirked at the group, “How did Kaz even manage to find someone like that, furthermore, how did Kaz keep it a secret for so long?” the sharpshooter questioned, one eyebrow raised far above the other. “They seemed so lovely, its surprising Kaz would let someone like that so close to him,” Inej chimed in, sharing a similar curiosity towards you.

As the weeks rolled on, the crows began dropping subtle hints to their leader of their interest in meeting you formally, evidently following the rules of the warning he dealt on the night of the intrusion. Curiosity was consuming the group, and even Kaz couldn’t deny his intensifying wish to display his proudest achievement to his closest friends, his relationship with you.

Unbeknownst to the crows, you too had been troubling Kaz about meeting his friends, desperate to erase your first impression on them and truly show yourself, not the terrified stranger begging for comfort.

After several nights of thorough bargaining with your husband, he reluctantly agreed to introduce his group to you, on the condition that you would be far from the Barrel’s hotspots, somewhere unreachable by rival gang’s watchful eyes. Squeezing Kaz’s hands tight, and giving him an appreciative kiss, you bound off to prepare for tomorrows event, leaving a softly smiling husband in your wake.

════ ∘◦ᵒ 𓅓 ᵒ◦∘ ════ 

Kaz couldn’t decipher his emotions as they rushed through him at an alarming pace, feeling anxious, excited, and fearful all at once. The pair of you had settled for your favourite café, a small establishment on the outskirts of the city, residing on a flower ridden street, colourful lanterns hanging like falling stars from ropes above the houses. The sight was a direct juxtaposition of the intensity found in your husband’s usual Barrel life, but a contrast which never failed to warm Kaz’s heart whenever he stepped foot there with you.

Dressed in your finest, you waited anxiously at the largest table the cramped café had to offer, adorned with scented candles, besides an array of flowers you had picked early that morning, dew still dripping from a few of the glistening forget-me-nots. You sat beside Kaz, gripping tightly to his gloved hand, the other fidgeting with the edge of his coat as a distraction.

Kaz instantly picked up on your nervous state, squeezing your hand in reassurance and brushing a whisp of fallen hair out of your gently lit eyes, staring long enough to just catch the flicker of the candles within your irises. “They’re only my crew, darling. If they do anything wrong I will…” Kaz began, but he was cut short by your breathy laugh. Apparently, the wrath of your husband against those who threatened you extended even to his closest and most trustworthy companions.

The door swung open, revealing a well dressed set of crows, their eyes steering directly to the couple before they briskly made their way over to you. A sudden fear rose within you, but you refused to display the same expression you had at the crow club, willing to give your best performance until the feeling subsided. You shot each one a welcoming smile, exchanging pleasantries as they made themselves comfortable.

The fear shattered within you as you took each of the crow’s expressions in, which all seemed to strangely resemble awe? Excitement? Your initial confusion was brought to a standstill as Kaz turned to them, stating clearly, “Everyone, this is Y/N, my wife,” offering a tight-lipped smile to his friends.

Nina suddenly spat out her drink, eyes bulging as Jesper made a choking sound somewhere in the back of his throat. Inej and Wylan sat looking dumbfounded, the boy’s jaw hanging slightly open.

“Uhmm. Excuse me, let’s take a few steps back, shall we? Wife?!” Jesper exclaimed, completely in astonishment. Kaz took a deep breath in before tightening his hold on your hand, clearly apprehensive to reveal his most vulnerable softness to his friends, who had rarely seen more than a smirk from their stoic boss. As the crows gathered their thoughts and tried to configure logical reasoning as to what had been revealed, the elderly owner of the café hobbled over, giving Kaz a toothy grin.

“It’s been a while Mr Brekker! I was wondering when we would be graced with your presence again, I have already prepared your regular, peach pie with…” The woman began but was cut off sharply by a “Thank you,” from Kaz, as he turned his head to hide his embarrassment. Nina let out a snort as the other three simultaneously burst into giggles, causing you to fall victim to the contagiousness of the laughter.

By this point Kaz was beyond mortified, being called out as a ‘regular’ at a joyful family-run café at the edge of the Barrel, as well as having his guilty pleasure exposed to his crew who he was positive would never let this go.

Despite this humiliation, Kaz felt a drop of warmth seep into his chest at the sight of you conversing with his friends, immediately connecting with each one of them. He felt something moving inside of him, deciding it was probably you, chipping away at his apparently impenetrable walls.

As the late afternoon clouds faded into the evening haze, the group departed with delighted goodbyes and warm hugs, establishing the beginning of many trips to visit Kaz’s (now) not-so-secret wife. You left them armed with new candles for the slat, baked goods, and most impressively, trinkets from the market which you had bought personally for each crow, going solely off your husband's descriptions of each individual.

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A glowing warmth radiated from the couple as you both walked, fingers entwined, back to your home, taking in the constellations which lit up the tranquil streets you winded through. Kaz decided to reward himself with a rare but well-earnt night in, with the single intent of being doused in your affection.

Kaz smiled lovingly down at you, as you peacefully slept wrapped in his shirt and coat, wiped out by the intense emotions that poured through you that day.

Crouching down slowly, your husband fiddled with a stray piece of your hair, admiring how the serene glow from the fire softened your features, catching in your figure perfectly, framing your face in a halo of light.

He settled down next to you, exhausted but proud. Proud of how far you two had come, which flooded him with a sense of relief. Because as it turns out, his crows could undoubtedly see the same beauty he was blinded by within you.

And it was clear in this moment, both to him and his crew, that Kaz Brekker was more than just in love with you. His entire existence was plagued with sentiment for you, and for once Kaz couldn’t seem to view it as a weakness, rather a sign that something deep inside him was healing.

“I love you, darling of my heart,” Kaz whispered as he kissed you goodnight.

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tag list: @chaoticbeanz @kryptonitewizard @alanis-altair @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy <33

[nine-is-not-a-ten]

Wylan: I protect my investments.

Jesper: Excuse me?

Wylan: What? Kaz said that's how you say 'I love you!'

Jesper: Oh. Oh waIT A SEC---

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

I so often think about what the tone of scene with the backless book would have looked like in the Six of Crows spin off.

In Six of Crows, when the crew arrive in Djerholm they go to an Inn and sit on the terrace to give them a clear, if distant, view of the road that leads to the Ice Court, and Kaz uses a device he calls a 'backless book' to see the prison wagon on the road with perfect clarity - it looks like a perfeclty normal book until you hold it open on a specific page at a specific angle. He passes the book around without telling anyone that it is actually a mirrored lens so that no-one else on the terrace will know what they're talking about, and when Wylan is offered the book by Jesper he initially refuses to take it. He asks 'What does it say?' and Jesper replies 'Just look'. In this scene everyone, including the reader, is yet to learn that Wylan cannot read and therefore this line doesn't have any particular impact on us in the moment, except as a continuation of the idea that Wylan feels uncomfortable and that the others tend to be impatient with him for the way he doesn't fit into their world. But imagine what this scene would look like with the added subtext that Jesper already knows he can't read but the others don't! AND the added subtext they already have an established relationship!!

Imagine the panic in Wylan's eyes slowly growing as the book moves round the group, imagine the hesitation in his voice as he asks Jesper what it says, imagine Jesper softening his voice to reassure him as he gently tells him that he just has to look.

And on this same vein, imagine Jesper beginning to piece together why Wylan 'left' his father's house early on. Imagine Jesper standing on the deck of the Ferolind with Inej as she quietly tells him that Van Eck writes to Wylan every week and Wylan doesn't even open the letters, the way she'd study him as she noticed that he knew something more than her but would never pry. Imagine the way the tone would change for when Wylan is drawing the maps of the Ice Court and says he hasn’t labelled anything because he doesn’t know Fjerdan, despite the fact that he’s already revealed he speaks Fjerdan - in the book no-one questions it and I think that’s partly due to Jesper mocking him and saying that he probably doesn’t speak it well (it’s confirmed later that he does) and partly due to the way he doesn’t fit in and the others aren’t really paying him much attention; it’s a brief moment the reader doesn’t put much stock into until they find out that Wylan can’t read at the end of the book. The added dimension of us already having that subtext would have been absolutely fascinating and I am so so upset we don’t get to see it play out, especially since we would probably have a lot of Wesper angst going on as well - I’m imaging the way Wylan would fear Jesper ratting him out or turning on him because he lied to him and being so shocked that he doesn’t and just not understanding the way he still cares about him or that he would still protect him because he doesn’t know what it feels like to be loved I’m gonna cry

[a-strangers-thoughtss]

Mmmm thinking about Wesper again

Jesper definitely having a crush on Kaz for a little while and then getting together with Wylan,

Wylan… who is heavily paralleled with Kaz throughout both books.

Wylan being incredibly kind and understanding towards him aswell as literally covering for his fuckups and red headed… like his father

Jesper finding someone who can match his crazy while also keep some of his more stupid decisions in check Find someone who can help him regulate his addiction and calm him down when he goes too crazy

Wylan who hasn’t had really anyone pay him an ounce of positive attention in years getting together with someone who litteraly constantly flirts with him and pays attention to him (see Jesper helping Genya give him his face back)

Jesper who never faults him for his dyslexia and instead actively helps him by reading to him

Jesper who pushes him out of his comfort zone and brings out the more adventurous and bold version of himself. Who doesn’t judge him and instead actively encourages him to take up more space.

Uggggg they make me crazy

I love their dynamic so much bc they are so different and similar at the same time

Like they have these little things in common, both have complicated relationships with their parents, both feel like fuckups!!!!

It’s just that they have such different versions of their issues that complement eachother so well (and this goes for Kanej and Helnik aswell)

While Wylans dad is an abusive ass who actively attempts to injure and kill him, Jespers father genuinely loves him and wants to protect him so much that he discourages the use of his powers (the things that could get him killed).

Jespers mother dies when he was young saving a child while Wylans mom’s death is faked when he is young because she is attempting to protect him. (They are both absolutely amazing)

Wylan feels like a fuckup because his father constantly told him how much of one he was for something that was out of his control, and he doesn’t feel useful at all.

Jesper feels like a fuckup because he makes bad decisions and actively puts himself and Colm in danger regardless of the fact that his father wants him to be safe.

Different circumstances, similar feelings

Maybe I’ll go even more in depth into this later, and I’m sure people have pointed these things out before but I just need to say them too bc it’s making me crazy.

[darjeelinh]

Jesper “guard against pain” vs Wylan “guard against joy”

Jesper’s jokester and confident façade was to protect himself from feeling pain, but inside he’s insecure and vulnerable. He hid his grisha nature because the only person who ever treasured it was taken away from him, and grew up being told that it was a curse. So instead he acts like he doesn’t need it. He acts like he takes all the losses and all the hurtful things in good stride but deep inside he’s feeling lost and guilty all the time. That boy is always bouncing on his feet with guilt all the time in the duology. Guilt for disappointing everyone: his father, Kaz, Inej, his mother, and himself. When he thought about Wylan at the end of SOC he thought Wylan wouldn’t want to hang out with criminals like him anymore once he got the money and that had stung more than he thought: it’s the boy inside him feeling abandoned again, the boy that does no good to anyone other than in a fight. And he cope with all that pain, that guilt, with his addiction and his gunslinging - which no one really paid any mind until Wylan saw through his façade.

Wylan, whose joy and hope was taken away from him by his father, was always made to feel less than, shared the same constant feeling of guilt for just being who he is. His father made sure of it, that he knows he’s not allowed to feel anything but anxious and guilt, and his joy was to be choked out of him (metaphorically and literally). Wylan in the show couldn’t even believe when Jesper told him he was smart, thinking it was just a trick to coddle him into some false sense of joy before it would be taken away again. Wylan in the books still holding on to the last shred of decency for his father until that moment at Saint Hilde, instead blaming himself for it, maybe because it would give him a false sense of control over his own pain. Until Jesper saw his own guilt mirrored in Wylan, and helped him to his feet.

Both Jesper and Wylan were able to keep some part of goodness in the face of everything that happened in their lives: Jesper with his good spirits, Wylan with his morals - standing up against Kaz again and again despite being threatened every time. In Jesper, Wylan learned to accept joy again, and that this won’t be taken away from him. And in Wylan, Jesper knew that he has a safe space where he can accept his pain and heal from it in a healthy way.

“You can love something despite seeing all of its flaws.”

Anyway, Wesper is each other’s safe haven.

[lilisouless]

Wylan giving the crows painting lessons, p2

Wylan: alright, can i see your paintings?

Jesper: here´s mine, i used oil paintings , i know the shapes aren't as defined but-

Wylan: whos, this is nice, i love the colors

Nina: aw, you painted Wylan sleeping, he looks like an angel

Matthias: you know, i was afraid you would-

Jesper: and look at the uncensored version!

Jesper lifts a sheet and both Wylan and Matthias groan

Matthias: didn't need to see that! thats too much detail..did you put all your effort on that specifically?

Nina: Did Jesper exagerate or-

Wylan: Nina!

Nina: what? wanna see my portrait

Wylan: well...it´s...it not bad, it has a tridimensional look and there´s a clear artistic style

Matthias: It´s an almost naked portrait...of me. I can't believe you guys took advantage of this to make your...inappropiate jokes

Nina: innapropiate? Matthias, where is your artistic sensibility? There´s nothing inappropiate in natural beauty

Matthias: you put volume in my abs, like, only there, everything else is just flat

Nina: it´s a metaphor, your stomach is protected, meaning your head is clear of emotional bursts, it´s serenity

Matthias: you painted me completely naked, and gave me long and wavy hair to cover my intimacy

Nina: it´s another metaphor, your whole being and feelings are exposed, and only embracing the beauty of life (like that hair) will keep you free

Matthias: you also did my torso three times bigger than my head and legs, you gave me noodle legs and a whole tank up there

Nina: it´s a representation of all the weight you have to carry

Jesper dries a tear: you are such a poet

Wylan: lets just get to Matthias´s painting

Wylan: hey, it´s good, you have a hand for the curves-

Jesper: oh gheezen!

Nina:Matthias, please i know you are always wanting but this is not the time. You drew me too sexual

Matthias: what? no i did not!

Jesper: you exagerated with the boobs

Matthias: no i didn't! i just shaded a bit, Wylan said it was good to give them life-

Nina: well if you wanted real boobs you could have just told me!

Matthias: i didn't...i shaded everything! i put the same shading in everything,not just the boobs! it´s not sexual! she is just that rounded!

Jesper: you make me sick,Helvar

Nina: you prophane poor Wylan´s canvas

[jazzythursday]

What are a few of your favorite ship moments?

(for the ask game) :)

Hello! Thanks for the ask <3

All wesper moments are my favorite ofc, but here are some of the first ones that come to mind:

- Jesper adjusting the strap of Wylan’s satchel. It’s just such a quiet and intimate thing it gets me every time.

- Wylan’s little rant after Jesper accidentally kisses Kuwei makes me laugh every time. Specifically (I’m paraphrasing) “He’s not even good at science! Half his notebooks are filled with doodles—most of which are of you—and those aren’t very good either!” 10000/10 no notes. He is so petty I love him.

- THE KISS. It was a prairie fire!! It was the spin of the makker’s wheel!! It was the kiss he’d been waiting for!!!

- (Again, I’m paraphrasing) but after Saint Hilde’s when Wylan is breaking down there’s this bit where Jesper tells him it’s okay and when Wylan says it isn’t Jesper says something like “You’re right, it’s not. It’s rotten.” That’s a really powerful moment to me. That Jesper doesn’t downplay the situation or invalidate Wylan’s emotions. It isn’t okay, it’s terrible, but they still have to keep going.

- When JVE charges towards Wylan in the church of barter and Jesper fucking STEPS IN FRONT OF HIM???? OH MY GOD!!! Like, I cannot stress enough that there are so few people (probably none, except maybe Marya) who have EVER shielded Wylan from his father, who have PHYSICALLY gotten in the way of that man and told him no, you don’t get to do that. It's such a clear show of support, even more than one of protection. And then of course there's "I can read to him", which is just the cherry on top isn't it? Jan is well and truly powerless now, because he doesn't have anything left to lord over Wylan's head. It’s over, his threats and insults and opinions don’t matter anymore. Jesper can read to him, and they'll be fine.

soc ask meme

[gorgeousgust]

MOONDUST. - K.B

Pairings: (Kaz Brekker x Reader)

A/N: Hello beautiful people! This was a request back in 2021 and I couldn’t write it. Due to my business in studying and since English isn’t my main language, I wasn’t good in writing that well. I loved the request and I didn’t want it to be bad and recently I started to write again due to ease my mind from the anxious things, I wanted to try and give it a shot. I also put a bit weight into Kaz’s way because I felt that would be more fit for the song and fiction. Hope you like it. Inspired by the song named [Moondust by Jaymes Young]

Request: Hey there dear! I saw your song inspired fic for Kaz with War of Hearts and I loved it. Now I'm wondering if you would do one for Kaz with "Moondust" by Jaymes Young (I'm obsessed with that song lately) in which both him and the reader are in love with each other but they decide to keep it quiet believing that it's the best for the other?

Warnings: It’s all honey and glass

Word Count: 1.242

Looking at you, like a star

From the place, the world forgot

It was a desperate attempt, trying to catch your glance. Kaz, sweared to himself inside, why he was acting this sentimental. Needing to see your face, hearing your angelic voice and to cross his eyes to yours.

Like you were a star, you shone through the bitterness of Ketterdam. Bitterness of his heart. The one thing he admired you about is that you were caring. Whatever Jesper rambles, what Nina wants to eat, Wylan’s info-dumps or Inej’s prayers -even you cared so deeply about what he wanted to say too.

But most of the times, Kaz didn’t share anything. He just stayed silent. However, you were fine with it. You loved to spend time in his silence, it was calming. A mutual understanding was there.

Both of you could relax with each other’s presence.

And there's nothing, that I can do

Except bury my love for you

But Kaz couldn’t be vulnerable. He had to be strong, cold and sharp. The thing about surviving in the Barrel is that you cannot have any weaklings. If you want to rule, you gotta be cold and cautious.

Sometimes as some of the nights passed without your company, he would think to himself. Besides thinking every outcome, Kaz thoughts about you. How, deeply inside his mind, he wants it. He craves your warmth, your affection and your caring nature.

He lived his life in a hell. He lost his family, his childhood. Living his life with a rage that’s just surround his every moment. With vengeance. Always having his guard on. It was tiring in some way.

His enemies thought the weak spot of him is his limp. They weren’t smart or Kaz��s just too cautious to hide the real one. It was you.

But he never showed it. Every heist, every dinner with Crows, all the sessions of your hangouts, he never showed it. He buried into his chest and never dared to admit anything.

As in the other hand, you understood him. In every action he took, what was the motive behind that.

Living in the Barrel and growing up without a stable home and family wasn’t surprising. In addition to that, the traumas buried under the grounds of Barrel.

The first time you realized he may care for you in a different way. After spilling you his past, he trusted you. That night a bright feeling of anger sat inside your chest and you wanted to protect him. What a conundrum.

Unfortunately after that night, as you also let yourself be vulnerable to him, the other day came and you both pretend that night was never really happened. For the sake of the surviving.

Sometimes, most of the times actually, you wanted it. You would’ve wanted to try. Be brave for him, like a lover. But in these circumstances, it was impossible. If you two met in another life maybe, but in this life, ot was just impossible to act on it.

I long to hear your voice, but still I make the choice

To bury my love (to bury my love)

In the Moondust

A week passed after the petty argument inside his office. He was pissed after an unsuccessful heist. The results of the heist cost the loss of money and Inej got hurt, you got hurt. Under his watch, you got hurt.

Kaz went insane. He was extremely violent as he saw you and Inej got hurt because of the hired Grisha’s in Ketterdam.

As you went to his office later that night, you wanted to talk to him. To explain him that you are alright and everything is going to be alright, he lashed out on you. About your optimism and your carelessness.

Which wasn’t true. You were careful, he knew it. He was pissed because seeing you hurt, he had seen it before but those times he hadn’t realized he was in love with you, this time he knew it. The fact that he tried to shut it out, to bury it out. So he was pissed because he almost lost himself and terrified, Kaz Brekker got terrified. Unlikely of him, wrongfully so.

So, you felt hurt after his accusations and you also got angry with him and the two of you argued.

A week passed. As the of you didn’t hold a conversation. Kaz longed to hear your lovely voice. Your rambles, your gorgeous eyes. However, whenever that thought crossed his mind, he closes his eyes momentarily and try to focus on his work and bury the thoughts of you again.

He was dark, crooked and full of vengeance. Opposite to him; you were like a star. You were kind, elegant and you make things around you better. He wasn’t like that, he was destructive while you were constructive.

Nothing can breathe, in the space

Colder than, the darkest sea

His nightmares came to present again. Haunting him as everyday wasn’t just enough but haunting him into his dreams were cruel as always.

He could feel the Jordie’s lifeless, cold hands gripping his collars. Acting like madly and shouting at him about the past, he was feeling to lump on his throat and the uneasy feeling inside of his body. His hands trembling, his head is foggy and the paralyzing feeling of the touch of skin just makes him want to die. To end his suffering.

But he wouldn’t he just couldn’t.

I have dreams about the days

Driving through your sunset breeze

Because you as Jordie pulls him into the water, you on the other hand help him to breathe again. You came into his dreams, after sleep deprived for days, the only time he drifted off to a nap, it filled with you. You were looking at him with your soft eyes. Your warm smile and your blissful laugh.

You waltzed into his dreams so smoothly and it helped him to sleep for couple hours without waking up in a drenched with sweat.

Yeah, I'm living far away, on the face of the moon

I've buried my love to give the world to you

Maybe in another reality he could’ve held you closer but as like the two of you agreed in a silent way that not acting on what you feel to each other was the of protecting each other.

Kaz Brekker and Y/N L/N had to be careful. Surviving in the Barrel wasn’t easy not when you two had enemies, unfinished business and haunting ghosts from the past.

Nina protested it in a way. She was the one who saw it in the first place. She could her Kaz’s heartbeat as hearing your laughter. It was beating fast. Or whenever he entered the Slat, you would directly look at him and your heartbeat, well, it was beating too fast.

She never understood why you two kept it from each other and why the two of you don’t chase the true love but it was a conversation for another day.

You and Kaz maybe didn’t act upon it but what the two of you felt was real. It wasn’t negotiable and it was pure.

The thought busied him throughout the nights. So he promised himself after he got his revenge on Pekka, he would come for you. He would be a better man for you. He would be more for you, he would try so hard to earn you.