#it's going to be a rough next few days
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Fucking thrown about Taeil rn. 🙃 He's not my bias but my friend's and he's managed to avoid everyone that was accused of shit like this by sheer vibes. He's been into kpop since 2012 and managed to swerve on kris wu, seungri, himchan, etc all before their related scandals dropped. The fact that he ults Taeil already has me denying that it could be possible. But SM kicking him before any allegations even dropped??? I can only hope that this just happened midway through contract negotiations and that's why???? I'm so utterly lost about all of this because old man Taeil with a broken hip is the one I would have expected the least. I'm in shock and denial right now and can only hope that this is some wild misunderstanding. I need the facts that come out before I lean one way or another in all of this but I'm bracing myself mentally. 😬
#aquila be quiet no one cares#kpop more like aquila shut up#I just want to know what he's even being accused of beside sex crimes#but something tells me that it has to be deranged if everyone is unfollowing him and sm of all people kicked him out#it's going to be a rough next few days#god casper hasn't had to go through something like this since jonghyun I mostly want it to be a misunderstanding for his sake#I know Taeil the least out of the members like I'm really hoping for the best and preparing for the worst here#poor Jaehyun tho my dude basically had his solo canceled in the face of this 😬#I couldn't even focus on dojaejung bc the news about moonbin dropped the same day and his acting shit keeps getting canceled#bro really is cursed#I know everyone is immediately agreeing with that one girl on Twitter and assuming that's why but we have no knowledge#everything there is just speculation so far with nothing being officially said beyond sex crimes and its not related to a same sex minor#I've seen these sorts of things go either way but the reactions from people that know him are tilting me towards wtf Taeil territory#trying to stay as neutral as possible but I think this isn't going to end well
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I write fragile on a dozen boxes salvaged from recycling I forgot to take out before I knew I was moving and my hand shakes even more each time. The lines bleed off the box corners and into me. I'm fragile, you see.
#poem#poetry#spilled ink#spilled thoughts#long story short i have made choices in my life such that my only option when i hit this present juncture#was to move home and i am not handling the lack of choice well#in my first year living here especially i bought beautiful fragile things because i love beautiful fragile things and because i thought#i was on the path that my next move would be my last one. i was going to buy a home and that would be it and i'd only need to pack up#my whole life once more and so i could justify the vintage vases and such. but the past couple of years have been brutal on me#and i've made choices that i stand by and choices that i don't and now i'm moving home and it's less than ideal but i'll make it work#perhaps this is short story long#anyway. before i first moved in my roommate texted me from home depot because she and her boyfriend were at home depot#and i was at work at the time. and she wanted to know what color i wanted my room because they were gonna paint my room that day#and i didn't have time to make a decision and she's an artist with a great eye so i sent her my pinterest decor board and said maybe a gree#like this kind of green? and she got this gorgeous green reminiscent of a paris green that looks amazing with all my art on the walls#but i just had to take the art down. i'm in the middle of the task actually. and now it's just this big green expanse#and i'm not feeling so good about leaving this place#but the way i felt so safe and so loved when i got that text and when i got here and saw that the room was painted bc they wanted me to sta#the past few years have been not so good in a lot of ways like i said but this place was an island of peace for me when things were rough#anyway. fragile. thanks for listening
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An old deleted snippet from my work 'Cats and Communication.'
#dc comics#batfamily#batman#batfam#tim drake#robin#damian wayne#ao3#fanfic#ao3 fanfic#just posting to distract from the clusterfuck going on right now#which will probably be my catch phrase for the next four years#anyway lets just forget and be escapist for a few days#deleted scene#rough draft#very rough#hence the why it was deleted
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another animatic because i was possessed
#call of duty#gary roach sanderson#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#cod mw2#cod roach#cod#roachghost#ghostroach#my art#animatic#the past few days have been rough on my laptop#this will really be the last animatic ill do for a while#but i learned... a bit? hopefully i still remember it the next time#im going back to my regular schedule#i see tons of mistakes but uhh ill fix that later (indefinitely)#would you believe me if i said i finished this in 3 days#yeah me neither#fun fact this song was originally for a different fandom but the ghostroach brainworms got me first
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absolutely delicious flavour of edizzy is where theyre Actually Married but neither of them know it, while also being acutely aware of everything-
they celebrated 25 years of their matelotage. they are having sex on the regular. both of them think the other thinks their contract is purely for financial reasons and the sex is just fun + convenience.
#'hes just having sex with /me/ because he knows im not going to stab him in the back (literally)'#meanwhile theyre having the most tender schmoopy sex known to man because theyre both so fucking in love#(not 2 say anything abt the actual sex theyre having they can be as rough as they want itll still be tender because theyre having FEELINGS)#'of course we have a matlotage it'd be silly to not have a financial agreement when our lives are so entwined. whats mine is his'#and at the same time theyre celebrating anniversaries with blowout bashes and gifts and shit and just#theyre so fucking aware of their marriage but theyre SO STUPID about it#'but what if he doesnt like me like that' about the man whos slept next to him for decades#nyxtalks#ofmd#izzy hands#israel hands#edizzy#blackhands#anyway it ends when someone else finally points it out#classic steddyhands set up. eds talking about his relationship with izzy and stedes like 'youre married' 'yeah but not like that'#'absolutely yes like that edward- am i the other woman?????' and it takes a few days and a lot of convincing but they talk about it#and realise oh theyve been real actual married all their lives huh#que more fucking schmoopy sex. hand holding and tears and shit and maybe its a little cringe but its their wedding night ok ????????
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Hey everyone, long time no see! Apologies for the months of silence - but I’m back now! I needed to take a much needed step back from HOCO and focus on some other projects of mine (as well as play a ungodly amount of BG3 hehe).
On my break, I also decided to kinda tear down HOCO and rebuild it from the ground up. I wasn’t really pleased with how the story was going and I think that really contributed to the burnout I felt with the project. I still would like to include the premise of the various life stages, but may go about it in a different way than I had initially planned - things to think about more I suppose!
Anyways here’s some behind the scenes of what I’ve been up to - starting with revisiting the cast’s (+ Nico’s) main outfits and updating them :3
#🪳 - roachie scatter#♥️ - abt hoco#💌 - abt henry#🥀 - abt lyra#🧸 - abt elijah#💋 - abt sandy#📻 - abt nico#all traditional bc me and digital art / my tablet are beefing rn 😒#these are all rough too - they will get more polished up once i make official character sheets and the like :3c#and dont worry Henry still has his iconic letterman it's just not always on him (esp once in the adult life stage) :3c#i'll start answering asks again these next few days but I may have to go through and filter some bc last time i checked i have like 300+#i love yall but idk if i wanna answer all that ;w;#also roach try not to have a clear favorite of the cast challenge level impossible
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update on the whole tooth situation: I need surgery 🙃
#ngl it’s been a……ROUGH 24 hours#barely had much sleep and the pain has been near constant and terrible#and got probably the worst news I could have gotten for this so just not feeling great all around#but I’m on antibiotics and painkillers. just been white knuckling it through the night hoping it gets easier#I think it is#anyway idk how active I’m gonna be in the next few days#and it’s my birthday tomorrow….who knows how that’ll go now#I have the best friend in the entire world though who has been with me through this whole ordeal 🥹
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twirling my hair thinking abt the threads tht i have in my drafts tht have taken months to get to
#ooc.#tbd.#its what i do#its my ~ flavor ~#however i havent slept / have busted out a bunch of first drafts#ill straighten them up over the next few days methinks#it's been my first christmas in a long time w my brothers so i just havent really been prioritizing tumblr#they go home on the second then i should be going back to business as usual#it'll only take ONE month instead of three LMAO#i've also been like traveling this year which has made me put online things on the backburner#+ there were other things i was dealing w & still am#which im not sorry for but like this is just my rambling I want to write more than i have time to lmao#i did just start all of the epic starters / some memes#but my first drafts always rough so i dont post them right away#especially w no sleep in me who knows what tomorrow me will think of them LMAO
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Good thing #10: Someone I know bought me a coffee today :)
#good things#bit of a hard day but I am determined to post at least one thing every day on here#I will find at least one good thing every day#even if I have to sit for a bit to think of what good stuff happened#or if a day is so rough that all I can really say is that the sun came up today#I will find good in every day bc that's what's going to get me through the next few years#being kind and finding the good in every day#if anyone has read this far down in the tags I hope you manage to find something good in every day too
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idk how much i'll be around in the next couple of days but!!! i hope everyone celebrating has a great time and can relax 🥹💜
#i kinda had a rough day again im gonna try to throw more in queue tonight to go out over the next few days#n i need to get on my ruan mei blog when im back too.... i miss her...#. ˚ ◞ 𓂅 ⌖ for the blue bird is with me.
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saw your recent post, just wanted to send my best wishes
your srtimator videos have really cheered me up recently, hope you can find something to do the same for you
:)
thank you very much ;-; currently watching scar stream lol. im really glad you like the videos so far 👍
#next video will go up next week probably#asks#but i really appreciate it a lot ive had a rough few days
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Wish me well
In my descent
Into hell
#my writing#poetry#poem#seriously#the next few days are going to be rough#Expect less poems for 3-5 days#spilled ink#creative writing#poets on tumblr#writers on tumblr#quick write#writers and poets
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on the phone having a sad and awkward conversation with my brother (he is in the psychiatric hospital and mad about it) and so to lighten the mood he says well how are the red wings doing. well bud i hate to tell you this but...............
#red wings (handshake emoji) my brother: going through a rough patch these last few days but next week will be okay.#ignore me everyone. im having emotions abt my brother that feel too big for my body.#haha lol. im going to church tomorrow which should make me normal again#podium
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just had paramedics called on me for the first time todayy
#'just' means like 9 hours ago ive been resting btw also im fine i was just scared#i was 90% sure it was a panic attack! but Both my parents having tons of heart problems was making me really dread that other 10%#that i wasnt so sure about#but i am fine it was a confirmed panic attack and nothing is wrong#i had some kind of mental revelation that ive been slowfully and painfully untangling ever since#but its going to be the literal turning point in my ENTIRE life. i am not the same person who woke up this morning#sorry everyone im late for updating you all about my newest medical history update today#no but seriously im bringing this up now because the next few days migjt be rough! for me#im going to try and keep it off the internet as much as possible but just in case i somehow end up doing it anyway i guess#hashtag rosies first honest to god panic attack <3#im fine. and i will continue being fine. i will simply need an appropriately approximated mandatory adjustment period#yeah so ummm the thing i am astounded by the most right now is#i dont think i have EVER been SO truly angry in my whole. i have never felt the need to describe myself as 'furious' until today#boy they werent kidding that post traumatic stress disorder can COMPLEX#sorry just trying to be a little bit silly its called i get a little bit silly i just need a little controlled boost dose of normalcy here#im fine.
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Ugh feeling real lonely tonight
#the toucan squawks#I need friends#Especially in person#And I wanna wake up next to somebody too =[#I haven't talked to someone properly who I genuinely like and choose to be around in over a year#Technically I did in August with my friend before it moved away but I was only there because I was in the area very briefly#If we're talking about interacting with a friend for multiple days in a short period then we are talking literal years#Life's rough but alas I'll live and I'll make it eventually#There are grand things on the horizon but it's just going to take a little while to get there and a few chances along the way....
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Im going to be FERAL today
#the next few days Im not allowed to eat#this coinciding with a flare of Kai Sleeps Every Free Second is going to be rough
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