#it's because they dont want to and nothing i say is going to change that

[zorbik-guligan]

Not really sure what incongruous means so I'll look it up after but it does feel like as i get older life gets more complex theres more things i understand now that sure i knew about them before but not in great detail but it feels like I've become so fucking complex as a person that if i tried to explain what i actually think and feel it would just overwhelm a person so i try and section myself off into pieces and just use different parts of me with different situations or people and it may just be because ive spent most of my time these past 2 almost 3 years now alone with nothing to do but think and figure myself out that when im asked what i think about something slightly personal its kinda hard to say it just got lost in my head somewhere and that whatever i think will change at a moments notice like i can bring up memories of lots of things and remember nostalgic times but i spent so long thinking about why i feel a certain way or what makes me feel a certain way in order to try and get a better hold of myself that ive kinda forgotten alot of my past like so many memories that i made are just gone because remembering them made me feel a way i dont want to feel like i remember realizing the beginning of 6th grade that i had completely forgotten 5th grade and the reason why was because that time i had was so nice yet not at the same time my brain just frogot because it didn't want a reminder of how good yet not something can be like great teachers who for the first time ever actually seemed to care as far as i could tell class mates who were generally friendly and occasionally checked on me if i seemed off yet i felt so alone cause nobody there really seemed like a real friend like the friends i had before who even when we were in deep trouble wouldn't rat me out and would stick with me who genuinely cared and missed me if i was sick getting older and not having anyone to socialize with for really formative years off my life has made understand those really old dudes who are nice and always up to make friends but just seem extra lonely for some reason despite knowing so many people i guess technically being that alone did hurt me but i kinda learned that im just not alone ever when im outside theres always some squirrels birds or plants nearby that make it more lively its why ive grown so fond of certain forested spots they are always lively and it feels like hanging out with all my friends its also why i enjoy making things like with metal or wood stone or even writing and painting those things feel alive in a way same with music and having time to think so much has made me reflect and realize that no day is the same and even when something changes something else stays the same or gos back to how it was in a weird cycle like growing but remembering where you were growing older for me anyways is like gaining more skills and more knowledge not just on the stuff around me but on myself too obviously people change sometimes pretty quickly too but getting older makes you learn more about yourself which duh that how life works but still it feels weird to be aware of it at 17 when it feels like i should still be trying to figure out my favorite youtuber or something not contemplate who i am as a person and what makes me feel the way i do but its a good kind of weird and theres always more to learn and find so i still have plenty of room to learn more about myself still not being able to really fully let a person know you kinda sucks but to be fair that is a rather special thing its also nice being able to put into words why i feel a certain way so that i can actually explain myself instead of just going quiet cause i dont know myself that well still kinda funny to know your own problems but not be able to jusy fix them when you know its a very deep problem even when it seems surface level and damn i got kinda personal there woops also just noticed that im shaking so might be overwhelmed remembering 5th grade which is probably why i frogot it or at least thought i did

anybody else feel that being human is like being a long-time syndicated cartoon character watching the world get more complex while your own design stays the same until youre incongruous with the reality around you??

[cursedextrovert]

People comparing CaitVi dynamic season 1 and 2, are we watching two different shows or y'all just forgot what happened in the middle. There was literally a war going on, Cait's mom fucking died like are they just gonna be lovey dovey with all these politics going on? And then one moment they leave everything to just be with each other in that jail cell you are also mad like wdyw?

Also people who say their sex scene is not necessary and/or a bad representation.

Firstly, JayceMel also got a sex scene in season 1 so its not like they invented sex just for these two lesbians.

Secondly, they didnt just fuck. Vi was beating herself up thinking she made the wrong decision and fucking things up like always and Cait told her that she actually let the guards go so Vi can do that exact thing she wanted. Ultimately saying a) she trusted Vi when she said Jinx has changed and wanted Vi to let the girl out b) she wanted Vi to be happy more than she wanted revenge even tho just some months ago she was the opposite.

Thirdly, we see the detail, Cait hesitates when she sees the bandage where she used to hit Vi. We see Cait taking off her clothes and showing her all, being vulnerable because Vi deserves that much from her.

Fuck. I get it, ok? This is a rare time we got a wlw relationship where both are main characters, and in a big show like this so you want it to be perfect and deprive of all flaws. But wouldnt you rather have two well-written characters where they relationship is tangled with the core of who they are than just a wlw couple with no conflict, no personal development no nothing? Hows that a good representation? Their relationship doesnt solve the conflict between them and their politics but is the reason why they were intertwined in the first place.

And dont come at me about systematic problems as well like Im a poc myself living in a white country and a sociology graduate. I understand Caitlyn did terrible things and is a war criminal herself with how she stands aside letting Ambessa did the thing she did and for gasing Zaun just to seek revenge. But she, just like everyone is a product of her sociocultural surroundings, shes a human affected by their beliefs and emotions. Isnt that the point of the show?

I dont think she got her happy ending just because she lives, I think being alive is her purnishment. She has her whole life to make up for what she did and I believe she will. What other fate you think she deserves? Her death will not undo her crimes, so is prison, they will also prevent her from actually fixing what she caused and ultimately using her priviledge for good(which shes doing, you can read my post about it). And Im not about to start the whole ethic debate on prison. How does one define a purnishment worthy? How do one define what a person deserves?

Finally, you know who else was a war criminal and walked away with what he wanted? Singed. Reality is like that, not black and white. People dont get what we think they deserve, ever.

[alicewrotethis]

𐙚ᣟ݂﹒𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐢 𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐩. 𝟑﹒

ㅤ۫ㅤ ˚ ۪˖𓏲﹒synopsis!! tsukishima comes to a realization ㅤ ˖ㅤㅤ۫ㅤ ˚౨ cw!! timeskip k. tsukishima x chubby!fem!reader, angst (i dont write angst much i hope i did good) ﹒ ◠ note!!  playlist i listened to while making this !  i still cant reply to comments, ALSO LAST PART i hope you liked the ending, but if u didnt let me know if u want more or just another tsuki series౨ wc!! 2.2k part 2 not proofread

Opening your eyes the sun shone on your eyes, memories of the night before instantly flooding your mind making a blush form on your cheeks.

Leaning up and resting on your elbows you smiled, the memories weren't a dream, and you weren't being delusional. Your eyes scanned the room, remembering how the stars looked while Tsukishima was on top of you. You shook your head, metaphorically swatting the thoughts away.

Facing to the right you noticed the bed was perfectly put together, what time was it?

Searching for your phone, and some clothes, you saw there was a small pile on the nightstand to your right. On top of the pile was your phone, and below it was a pair of volleyball shorts and his hoodie.

Grabbing your phone first the screen lit up, he had charged it for you. A smile appeared while you read the time, it was six. Tsukishima didn't have to leave until seven, you knew that because you leave at the same time.

Tsukishima would never tell you but he is supposed to leave at six thirty, but to talk to you he waits the extra thirty minutes and chooses to sprint to practice.

Throwing on the clothes you made your way to the living room finding Tsukishima sitting on his couch in silence, seemingly lost in a deep thought with a pensive look on his face.

"Hey, Tsuki," You greeted softly, not wanting to frighten him.

He swiftly directed his attention to you, he didn't answer for a moment as he gathered his thoughts and words. The silence brought a nervous look to your expression.

"Listen," He paused, "About last night,"

"Yeah?" You felt your heartbeat quicken.

"It was a mistake," He stood up now, walking over to you with ease.

You felt your heart drop into your stomach. You weren't quite sure how to feel in the moment, or well, you couldn't decide how to feel with so many emotions mixing in your head. You were filled with anger, sadness, and confusion. If barfing was an emotion, you'd feel that as well. Your mind was so clouded with emotions you couldn't form a reply, and if it wasn't what were you even meant to say to him? Just agree with him? Agree that it was a mistake and you'd go back to your normal routine together? It was something you'd never be able to do.

"We shouldn't have done it," He added.

You let out a scoff, staring up at him with your tear-filled eyes, "I cannot believe you, Tsukishima," You felt your tears drip down your cheeks and onto the floor.

"I dont want to lose you," Tsukishima felt tears threaten his eyes as he stared at your form. It was true, he didn't want to lose you, and being more than your friend meant there was a possibility of that happening. He was scared of how things would change.

"Lose me?" You sobbed out, "Youre losing me now,"

You turned on your heel towards the door, but before you could even get a step in Tsukishima wrapped his hand around your wrist.

You turned your head to him expectantly.

Tsukishima wanted so badly to tell you to stay, to tell you he didn't want this, but nothing came out, no matter how hard he tried to verbalize his thoughts he just couldn't, so instead he stared into your eyes with a pleading look, hoping and praying you understood what he meant.

You pulled your wrist away, "Dont contact me anymore, Tsukishima,"

He watched as you turned around, he watched as you slammed the door, and he watched the time pass as he stood planted in the same spot for thirty minutes. He wanted to cry, he wanted to sob, he didn't remember the last time he felt like this, if ever. Tsukishima in no way was an emotional person, well he wasn't until you came into his life. He thought back to his life before you, how every day was the same, how most of his days were filled with boredom or anger.

He missed you and you had only been gone for thirty minutes. But he decided it was simply for the best, you deserved someone who could properly speak their emotions, someone who isn't so passive-aggressive, someone who isn't him.

Your heart ached and yearned, you weren't sure how you could cry so much about someone who you had only just seen thirty minutes ago, someone who was probably fine without you, who was probably going about his day like his words held no meaning to them. You let him see all of you, feel all of you. The ghost of his hands only made you sob harder into your pillow, the way he roamed you as if you were the only person he'd ever laid eyes on. Were any of his touches real, did the words he said hold genuine meaning? So many thoughts ran through your head.

You knew you'd be late to work at this rate so you decided to call off work. You noticed you were still in his clothes, god, it was like he was haunting you.

Tsukishima didn't want to stay in his apartment any longer, everywhere he looked there you were. Memories of you on the floor studying, watching movies on his couch, baking in his kitchen, and now ghosts of you in his bed. He settled on heading to practice to hopefully take his mind off of you.

It was a decision he had really regretted.

You never left his mind, so much so it was affecting the way he played.

"What is the matter with you, Tsuki?" Kogane shouted after Tsukishima didn't even jump to block the ball. The nickname reminds him instantly of you.

"Its just practice," Tsukishima replied in a calm tone while walking to the benches for a sip of water.

"But you totally could've blocked that!" Kogane followed him.

Kogane considered Tsukishima a close friend, but Tsukishima did not, and he thought he always made that clear, but every day Kogane proved him wrong.

Tsukishima just sighed in response, he knew Kogane was right, Kyotani was always easy to read in two-on-twos, but how could he focus when all that he could think of was the sight of you crying? He wasn't sure how hed ever be able to forgive himself, let alone forget you.

"Is it about that girl that brings your lunches?" Kogane asked after taking a big gulp of water and almost choking on it, much to Tsukishimas's misfortune.

"It's none of your business," Tsukishima tried to maintain his usual scowl.

"Oh, it so is! Tell your dear friend about it," Kogane said, waiting expectantly.

"And why would I do that?"

"Because when she was coming around here you actually smiled a few times," Kogane explained, mimicking Tsukishima's angry face.

Koganes words didn't help Tsukishima in the slightest. He missed you even more so now, he missed how happy you'd make him, though he had a weird way of showing it.

"It's too late," Tsukishima said, he couldn't believe he was actually saying this to Kogane.

"It's never too late, Tsuki,"

Tsukishima didn't believe him, Kogane wasn't there, and he didn't see the look you gave him when you told him to not contact you again.

Despite everything, Kogane's words stuck with Tsukishima, and they rang in his head annoyingly, they rang on his way to class, and on the way back to his apartment, they especially rang when he passed the bakery you worked at. So there he stood, in the cold, outside the door. He contemplated walking in, what would he even say? Were you even at work? What if you already moved away?

Before he could change his mind Tsukishima opened the door, the warm air welcoming him in, as well as the smell of freshly baked bread and cakes.

"Welcome!" A girl called from the desk.

As Tsuki walked over to her he examined the walls and the pictures that hung on them, some were of customers, and cakes, but there was one of you standing next to a cake about as tall as you. You looked beautiful with your smile, the smile that used to be towards him. How he missed you.

Once Tsukishima asked if you were here the girl gave him a strange look, "Why? Whats it to you?" She spoke, attitude lacing her voice.

Tsukishima was taken aback by her aggressive tone, "I'm a friend," Though friend wouldn't be the best choice of wording.

"Are you Tsukishima?"

He raised a brow, "Yes?" How would she have already known his name?

"Oh! She talks about you like all the time, she let a cake burn one time to text you back!" She said with a smile.

Tsukishima felt his heart pang at the new information, here you were burning cakes to text him back and he shattered your heart like it was nothing, how could he have allowed himself to do such a thing? Losing you because he couldn't properly communicate his feelings because he was scared of something unknown.

Tsukishima liked to consider himself a smart person, but at this moment, here in this bakery, he felt like a complete and utter fool.

He found himself standing outside your door, hands by his sides. What was he even doing? You made it painfully obvious you wanted nothing to do with him.

"Tsuki?" Your voice called from down the hall, Tsukishima swiftly turned his head to meet your gaze. You were holding a brown grocery bag, your eyes were puffy and your hair was a mess, but he saw past that, to him you still looked as beautiful as you did that night.

Tsukishima didn't know what to say, everything he was previously thinking faded within a flash, his words once again failing him.

You stared at Tsukishima, he looked distraught, the sight of him was almost enough to make tears form in your eyes.

You walked closer to your door as he turned to completely face you, he prepared for you to yell at him, tell him you hate him, anything. He wasn't prepared for you to walk right by him and straight into your apartment.

Tsukishima sighed and entered his own, if he couldn't use words, he'd use something he knew you loved.

Baking.

Heading to his kitchen he took out all the ingredients he'd need to make strawberry shortcake. Looking at the bottle of vanilla you helped him pick out he smiled, remembering the look on your face while you were explaining the differences, the glimmer in your eye.

Tsukishima wasn't the best at baking, which was one of the reasons he liked having you over so much, you'd always bake his favorite dish for him, you were always doing things for him and he didn't even realize what he had.

Placing the last strawberry on the whipped cream he stepped back to get a full view of it. It was... strawberry shortcake for sure from certain angles. He didn't have enough vanilla to make another one since you'd always use his, so this... creation... would have to do.

Carefully walking to your door he knocked, and after a few moments you appeared, teary-eyed.

You rolled your eyes at Tsukishima, you didn't want to, but you couldn't help it. He broke your heart, and even after he did you still thought of him, you should be angry, and furious, you should hate him, and you hate that you don't. You hate that you still want him, you hate that he's still the person you think of most.

"What-"

Tsukishima cut you off by showing you the shortcake.

Your expression turned to confusion as you examined the creation on the plate before you.

"I didn't know that color was possible..." You muttered, trying to hide your amusement.

"I made it for you, I didn't have any more vanilla left so I couldn't make another one."

"Its gonna take more than that for me to forgive you," You flatly stated despite everything in you wanting to forgive him, to pull him into a hug, to hear his laugh.

"I'm sorry," He blurted out, finally finding the words to say to you, "I was scared,"

"Scared of what?"

"Losing you,"

You weren't sure what to say to him, you weren't even sure what to think at that moment. He lost you because he was scared of losing you? None of it made any sense to you.

"I meant what I said," He paused, "I can't stay away from you,"

And for the first time in a while, you managed to crack a smile, and so did Tsukishima.

You took the plate from his hands, "Youre on thin ice, Tsukishima Kei,"

Tsukishima felt as though the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders, he finally had you back, albeit he had a bit more work to do but he was more than ready for that if it meant having you in his life again. You, the one who made mornings tolerable, the one who made him realize there were more emotions than anger and boredom.

"Dont be a stranger, Tsuki," You said with a soft smile, to which he happily reciprocated.

"I dont think there's a world in which I would be,"

Tsukishima hated a lot of things.

He hated mornings, he hated polyester, he hated loud neighbors, overly enthusiastic people, and most of all, making friends with his neighbors.

But when you were around, he learned to tolerate things just a bit more.

mlist. rules. tags.

© 𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐄𝐖𝐑𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 ─ please don't copy, translate, or post any of my work without my permission !

tag: @ilovemymomscooking

part 1

part 2

[aphrvdisiac]

oh i know when ellabs fight with eachother reader is stressed tfff out. its rare, but when it happens its not pretty. they have been getting on each others last fucking nerve for the past week and on the fifth day of ellie mocking abby like a child and abby making unnecessary rude comments when ellie’s in the room, the blow up finally comes.

you enter your shared living room where abby is meal prepping her post workout meals in the kitchen and ellie is sketching in her notebook on the couch, you prance over in your mini skirt and a short cardigan layered over your tiny crop top and let your girlfriends know your headed off to lunch with dina, who is introducing you to a friend of hers. she is certain the two of you will get along well and was hoping your over bearing girlfriends would be chill with it because it’s dina’s close friend.

the problem was though, you had only asked abby if you could go to this little brunch and she hesitantly agreed. she trusted dina and would have a friend of abby’s keeping a close eye on you while you were out little did you know. and with ellie and abby being petty with each other all week, abby hadent exactly gotten around to telling ellie this. so when you walk into the living room dressed as skimpy as the weather would allow and saying your goodbyes, ellie was a little more than confused.

“and where the hell do you think your going?”

you tilted your head in confusion “…out with dina and her friend? did i forget to tell you?” you were starting to worry abby had changed her mind about letting you go.

“and who told you y-“ “she asked me, is there a fucking problem williamson?” abby abruptly put down the tupperwear she had in her hands, turning to ellie and cutting her off

“your my problem anderson-“ “get a god damn grip-“ “oh please dont play the tough act with me-“ “i’m gonna fucking-“

the yelling echos through the opened floored room making you slightly flinch. being the sweetheart you are, you assumed it was your fault they were arguing and guilt filled you instantly; regretting even making plans at all. tears fell down your cheeks faster than you could register them. not wanting to cause more trouble you run into your shared bedroom away from the arguing girls. this shuts they both up as they turn with furrowed brows watching you hurry away from them with red eyes and puffy cheeks.

without another word they follow you into the room and knocking on the locked door, argument lost in their concern for you.

abby speaks first when you don’t immediately open the door “angel? it’s okay we’re done it’s done, need you open the door for us” then ellie piped up “your okay baby, wanna talk to you”

and you do. unlocking the door and sitting back on the bed you sniffle and the apologies instantly spill from your mouth.

“m’ sorry ill stay home. im sorry im so sorry. didn’t mean to make you upset els. i didn’t know. i’m sorr-“

“baby baby relax. come back yeah? you not in trouble sweet girl, what’s going on?” ellie comforts as she takes a seat next to you on the bed, guiding your head down into her neck where you sniffle and wrap your arms around her. abby follows, sitting on the other side of you and rubbing her big hands on your bare back under your top. “made you argue, i didn’t mean to js’ wanted to go see dina..”

“oh angel, you did nothing wrong, breathe baby. we’re not mad at you. just having a bad week is all. nothing to do with you perfect girl. we didn’t mean to scare you we’re so sorry.” abby speaks gently to you. she takes ellie’s hand behind your back, kissing it in silent apology, which ellie sends her a soft smile in return.

“but i-“ “shh no no no stop putting things in that head of yours. we’re not upsest anymore everything is okay. our crybaby huh? we know honey, just so sensitive yeah?“ abby continues to soothe your sniffling

“poor girl, looks like we have to show you how much we love you more, hm? i’ve got a few ideas. abs?”

“mmm i think i know just the way”

this is bootycheeks but whatever bc what better to do on my work lunch break then flood your inbox with my silly thoughts and this probably has 700 typos so just close your eyes

overstimulated and crybaby reader you are so me and lana you get it so well like….

ellie and abby’s hearts simply breaking at the sound of their girl weeping and sniffling, guilt running through them as they should know better than to even argue in front of you. when they see you teary-eyed with a pout on your face after they tell you to look at them, they know so many ways they’re gonna make it up to you.

they felt silly to even be fighting with each other to begin with because look at the consequences ): they got you crying and freaking out from them yelling at one another, and they always tried their absolute best not to. ):

ugghhh and the fact they’ll give you anything you in order for them to make it up to you… they’re such saps for their girl.

[queermania]

why am i not writing thinkpieces on the genocide happening in gaza despite not being palestinian, not being an expert in any field even remotely related to what's happening, and not being a journalist of any kind? well this might sound crazy but i figured donating my money to esims/relief efforts and using my time to contact my representatives might be more effective than just making sure everyone knew my uneducated thoughts on the matter. sometimes knowing when to shut the fuck up and not spreading a bunch of misinformation is actually a virtue.

i'm trying not to be uspet about things like this message because i know they come from a place of grief and a feeling of helplessness. this genocide has been going on for a long time and it often feels like nobody cares anymore, if they ever did, but somebody feeling grief over another tragedy doesn't diminish what they feel about palestine or what they're doing about it.

i could perform outrage and anguish on social media for you all day but that wouldn't get any of us anywhere. and i'm not saying that you're not allowed to express you anger or even that you shouldn't. i'm saying that i don't personally find it constructive, for me. all it leads to is spirals and traps that just leave me incapacitated and useless. i would rather do something tangible.

and that is different from the grief i feel over this singular event of a popstar passing away. there is nothing tangible i can do about it or even that i would if i could but that doesn't mean i don't have feelings about it, especially because of how close to home it hits, which is really what i was talking about in my post.

so i am sorry that you are in pain. and i'm sorry that it's so overwhelming that you don't feel like it's possible to hold space for anything else at the same time. but i can. and i am choosing to deal with my grief for these two things in different ways because they are very different things.

[jerreeeeeee]

as much as i enjoy the more wholesome fantasy high parents like jawbone and sklonda and the thistlesprings there’s something so compelling and achingly real about bill seacaster that makes him my favorite. he and fabian have a relationship that is so deeply unhealthy and entrenched in distorted ways of viewing other people and parenthood and the world, and yet is so fiercely and undeniably loving. like, is bill seacaster a good dad? what does being a good dad even mean for someone like bill? bill seacaster has such unrealistic and toxic expectations of fabian and a myopic, entirely self-centered way of relating to him for most of his life, and yet, you truly get the sense that even if fabian disappoints him again and again and never steps out of his shadow and never becomes the man bill wants him to be, bill will never love him any less than completely and unconditionally. bill seacaster is a man who has built his entire life and sense of identity around doing whatever he wants and never facing consequences and never thinking about anyone else. bill seacaster becomes disappointed in his son. and he finds the idea of that so unacceptable that, instead of demanding that fabian meet his expectations, bill loves him so much that he reconsiders his entire concept of himself and the purpose of his life, and he grows. a man whose legacy and identity was based around selfishness and narcissism and unwillingness to bend, and fabian makes him change.

[bonetrousledbones]

ngl i still dont fullheartedly believe in the knight papyrus theory solely because i will never pretend to have any clue on what the hell ever goes on in that dog's brain but i do think the funniest argument people ever make against it is when they say undertale and deltarune are two totally separate entities with no overlap of important characters whatsoever. its like they got to the part in chapter two where everyone fell asleep and then closed the game

[skunkes]

the bad: i have been raised without much warmth from my parents in childhood, but also pressured to conform to familial authority, doubt myself always, and value familial connections above all else (<- failed at this, and feel guilt about it.)

but also in experiencing this i have been so isolated from the entire rest of the world and others, that it will be nearly impossible to create my own "family" -> find safety and comfort in anybody else once my family is Gone. despite dis i find it really difficult to break away from the familiar, disobey and disappoint, because, well, why are my wishes more important than anybody else's. why would I cause upset and distress in anybody, and exert so much effort into my doubt filled half decisions, for my meaningless little Wishes. being away would also mean less time with these people who I'll never see again once they're gone. being raised this way is definitely paying off for those who did so.

the good: yaaaay adjacent inspiration for writing talon lore

[faaun]

procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally

[the-acid-pear]

Yesterday I was replaying Deltarune and I was going really insane about it picking up on things I missed on my first playthrough and something that fucked me up hard was this line here

The little ellipsis at the end, almost like you can hear the regret on their voice. Voice of an ad who is realizing maybe they fucked up on this one. But it also made me think of... The possibility of this being a reaction to Spamton's actions.

Because I don't think this was an automatic thing, I feel like their drifting off was gradual. Sure, their jealousy had won them over (I'd have killed the guy or myself if I was them so I don't even blame them) but Spamton was too getting busier and busier the more famous he got, and as they say, that never stopped. He only kept getting bigger, until it all came crashing down. And when it did it was one of them who tried to go find him, after all that.

But I digress, let's focus on the original quote from my favorite sigma enby themselves, Pink Addison. There's obviously not only the regret to it, but feeling like they were abandoned too. Both parties lost a lot and the real tragedy is just how easily it could've have been avoided! Or rather, how beyond their control it was...

But I'll get off topic if I keep speaking so I'll leave it at that. The sheer tragedy that there is to everyone involved just makes me insane. Like I said in a post previous to this; you cannot trace down a good guy or a bad guy in this tale, it's just desperate people taking awful decisions and living to regret their actions.

[berenshand]

shakespeare snobs still aren't ready for this conversation but revenge of the sith is the closest western media has to a modern equivalent of a shakespearean tragedy

- entertainment created for mass appeal

- effectively utilizes comic relief despite overall serious tone and/or subject matter

- the audience knows it's a tragedy going in

- utilizes, as shakespeare did, the elements of the greek tragedies which came before him, ie:

- the tragic hero is virtuous but for a fatal flaw

- the audience fears for and roots for the hero despite said flaw and their knowledge that the story is a tragedy

- in his attempts to escape his destiny, the hero unknowingly runs toward it, even brings it about himself

- it's entertainment for the masses even though the masses know it's a tragedy before it even starts

[lupismaris]

..

[doctorweebmd]

so there's this post floating around about like, feeling like an outsider even in a group of outsiders and i almost reblogged it being like

'aha i do that'

except. like. i know exactly why that happens, and its 100% my fault

i just have trouble maintaining relationships because i'm a poor communicator. that's been the case since high school. i dont really initiate conversations or remember to text or call people. its not from a place of indifference or anything like that - i'm sincerely an 'out of sight out of mind' kind of person.

i can not talk to and not see someone for months or years but my feelings for them don't change. it doesn't bother me if people dont check in on me or don't hang out with me or don't text me. i still like them. unfortunately that is not how 99% of the population communicates. people (rightfully) assume that when someone doesn't initiate conversation or hang-outs or doesn't check in on you, that they don't care about you. for me, thats not the case at all. like if i like you and consider you my friend, you are ALWAYS my friend. i would do anything for you and would be more than happy to talk/see each other/support you/etc. its just the day-to-day communication that i really struggle with. but thats how most relationships form - regular, consistent communication.

i've gone through periods of extreme guilt for this where i sincerely try, and make new friends, and re-connect with texting and phone calls and hanging out more often but inevitably something happens, i get busy or i forget and suddenly all this time passes and people think i dont care anymore. unfortunately that's not the case whatsoever - time is kind of abstract to me and i dont understand that while my feelings don't change, others feel more distant or abandoned.

and i've really hurt people in my life like that. friends that i've known for many years from high school/college are a LITTLE more forgiving because they know i'm just 'like that' but still. it does hurt people. like i haven't spoken to my dad in probably at least a year - not because i dont love him, but because of that same reason. he doesn't reach out and i forget and it just steamrolls because he gets hurt, doesn't reach out because he thinks i'm intentionally 'ignoring' him, and i continue to forget, and its just this viscous cycle. i haven't talked to my grandparents in months. my mom knows better and texts me every week or so, but it still hurts her that she has to reach out so regularly. she also plays these games where she sees how 'long' it takes for me to remember to reach out. a lot of people in my life have done that. its like i'm being tested on something without ever being told its a standard test, ya know? i'm always destined to fail it because i dont know how long is too long. at which point will the time and distance be unacceptable? i still dont know the answer.

and i think it makes me come off as a really heartless and callous person. its made me kind of keep people at arms-length because i know i'm not capable of being a part of most people's lives. i have perfectly normal and pleasant relationships with my coworkers and all that, but i'm generally not close with them. and i can see the confusion, because we hang out and i'm pretty normal or whatever and we have fun and then they don't hear from me for months and they're like 'uhhhh.... okay? so i guess you don't like me?'

i do. i just have different relationship maintenance standards than others i guess. so i just overall avoid being around others just because i know i'll disappoint them. it is what it is but it really is sad, in a way.

[veone]

I don't think any country has ever had a revolution for the actions it's military has taken in another country. Until the government starts killing the "right" people expect nothing.

[rainecloud020604]

girl help a soda did not fix me i have so much i need to do

[mymp3]

okay I got feelings out of my system. I'm a changed man now.