#and she told me about the same thing from her side. and she told me about how she loved london because she would walk the streets

[softbabybelle]

CORRUPTION𓍯𓂃 r ֶָ֢cameron 003.

rafe cameron x shy!reader

 𝜗𝜚 summary : rafe has been trying to get you alone for far too long and now that he finally has, he won't give the moment up for anything.

𝜗𝜚 words : 2.3k

𝜗𝜚 c!w : smut, humping, thigh riding, public!sex, finger sucking, risk of being caught, praise kink, kinda degradation kink.

part 1, part 2.

days had passed since the incident with rafe cameron and the boy who's name you didn't wish to remember.

this time, you hadn't gone out of your way to avoid the boy but instead went back to normal, almost as if nothing had happened between you two at all. you sat on the couch of tannyhill, giggling at something on sarah's phone with your legs crossed.

now, that simply wouldn't do.

rafe had been eager for a minute alone with you which seemed almost impossible when his sister was hanging off your side every minute you spent at tannyhill.

he was sitting on the living room couch, the one across from you both, scrolling on his own phone, a finger to his mouth as he gnawed at the completely bitten down nail.

his eyes kept travelling over to you, skimpy little summers dress clinging to your form while the skirt part began to ride up your thighs as you moved against the couch.

dirty thoughts swarmed his head, thoughts that shouldn't be repeated out loud. thoughts that shouldn't have been in his head to begin with.

he thought he was sure to be damned to hell for the things he was thinking.

and then, ironically enough, the gods seemed to smile down on him. it was as if all of his prayers had been answered and every beg and grovel had finally been listened to by an angel.

the angel who's name was wheezie, standing in the living room door frame. "sarah." wheezies hair was a mess, thrown into a bun with loose strands of hair sticking out every which way, she looked tired, so awfully tired and dreadful as she stared forward at her sister who's head instantly snapped up. "please help me. i'm trying clean out my wardrobe but it's too much."

a laugh fell from sarah's mouth. "no way. it's your mess, clean it yourself."

but that was when wheezie's arms crossed over her chest, cocking a brow. "I'm sorry, who covered for you and topper last night?"

"wheezie!" sarah exasperated, glancing out into the hallway. ward and rose were upstairs but sarah still didn't wish for them to hear about the late night activities she'd been getting up to with her boyfriend.

defeated, she turned her head back to you, who was sitting so sweetly on the couch, that same sickly sweet smile crawling up on your features. you liked watching the cameron siblings interact, even if it wasn't always so pleasant, there was something oddly homely about it. "'s okay, sarah, 'm fine down here."

"okay." she sighed, getting up from the couch. "okay, you just―just hang out for a while and i'll be down soon, okay?" she watched you nod. "okay, come on, let's get this over with."

and suddenly, tension ran thick through the air.

it was you and rafe, alone.

his legs were spread apart on the armchair he was seated on, eyes running up and down your body. you seemed to notice your dress riding up and instantly tugged it down with pink cheeks. you swallowed thickly. "I, uhm―i wanted to say thank you." your eyes finally looked up to reach his.

the minute he heard your voice, his phone was turned off and tossed away. his head cocked to the side. "what for?" teasing. for he knew exactly what for.

you squirmed in your place. "for everything you did with max."

"didn't seem too grateful when you ran away, hm?" he didn't mean the bitter words that slipped from his lips. he watched the way you hung your head low, eyes glassing over. instantly, a kind of guilt washed over him and he leaned back further into the chair. "c'mere." and he patted his thigh, watching your eyes flicker down. you glanced out to the hallway and he had to roll his eyes. "'s okay, nobody'll see you. they're all too busy."

you did as you were told, crossing the room and landing in his lap.

there was something so sensational about being in his lap again.

memories flooded your head, pictures and images of you and he, in this same predicament inside his bedroom, his lips tainting yours. you couldn't help but latch your eyes onto his lips.

"you wanna tell me why you keep runnin' away, hm?" you don't answer, eyes searching anywhere but his face. he doesn't allow it, turning you slowly towards him once again. "asked you a question, sweetheart."

you fought words inside your mouth, all threatening to come tumbling out. "was scared." is all he's met with.

"scared of what?" his head dips, his eyes trying to reach yours, trying to look in and gauge your emotions. "scared of me?"

you shook your head, fingers reaching out to trail across the fabric of his sweater. "i... liked it when you kissed me." you admitted and he watched as a blush fell across your face, red reaching the tips of your ears. "i liked it a lot but 'was scared that sarah would find out 'n i don't―"

"sarah doesn't need to know anything." he answers quickly. "besides, who you kiss..." his fingers trailed across your bottom lip, sucking in his own bottom one between his teeth as he gazed down at them, sweet like honey. "is none of her business, yeah?"

you nodded too quickly, too eagerly, too convinced by his words too quickly. "'m sorry, rafe, 'm really sorry."

"think i know how you can make it up t'me." his fingers left your lips and placed themselves against your hips. "you wanna make it up to me?"

"yes, please." came out too swiftly.

he couldn't help but smirk at your eagerness. "'m gonna kiss you again, okay?" and suddenly, you could feel heat pooling in the bottom of your stomach. he leaned in, his breaths falling hot against your face, his scent filling your senses. and just as his lips brushed against your own, he whispered. "you gotta promise me something first, 'kay?"

you licked your wet lips. "anything." wanting nothing more than for rafe to lean in and seal the kiss. you'd do anything he ever asked.

"no runnin' away this time." his fingers pinched at your jaw, holding it so your eyes could reach his. "you want this? you take it 'n you don't go pushin' me away again, alright?" a curt nod. "words, princess."

"promise." you spoke quickly. "promise, rafe, please."

his lips quirked.

but he didn't keep you waiting.

when his lips crashed into yours, you were very aware of the fact that you were sitting on the couch of tannyhill, the living room door wide open. all it took was for ward or sarah to come down the stairs and they'd see what you'd been up to.

they'd see that you weren't such a good girl after all.

but you couldn't seem to care.

you were too focused on his hot hot lips, tongue slipping into your mouth as he deepened the kiss, hands pinching at your waist, holding you in place.

your mind began to unravel, all you could think about was him. rafe cameron. you were sitting on his lap, kissing him, again. and you swore it was a feeling unlike any feeling you'd ever felt in your entire life. it was making you so desperate, so messy, so wet.

and you were sure he could feel it too. he tugged on your waist, rolling your hips against him.

you let a whimper be swallowed by his mouth.

his lips finally broke from yours for air but he didn't allow himself enough to fully regain his breath before they were latched beneath your jaw, sucking and kissing harshly.

again, he rolled your hips. you weren't sure if it was him moving you or you doing it by yourself now. you could feel him growing hard beneath you, you could feel him pressing himself up against your clothed pussy and all you could think about was how much you needed everything off.

you needed to feel him, skin to skin.

it seemed so close yet stretched so far away.

his hands ran up the skin of your thighs, pushing the fabric of your dress up as he went. "r-rafe." you whimpered out, head turning to the door. "someone could see―"

"'s what you asked for, isn't it?" his hands were rough against you, tugging the dress upwards, not caring for the family who remained upstairs. "isn't it?"

you swallowed thickly. "yes." you stammered out. "b-but―"

"you still wanna make it up to me, don't you?" his brows knitted together in this false sense of sadness, as if you'd done something awful to the poor man. you'd felt suddenly guilty for even suggesting that you stop.

you felt yourself ease against him, your own brows pinching together. "'m sorry, rafe, swear 'm sorry. i'll do anything, jus' please don't be angry―"

"'m not angry." he assures you, fingers brushing up and down your thighs, inching too high. "jus' need you to do something f'me, can you do that, sweetheart?" you were nodding like a puppy, eager to do anything he would ask of you. he maneuvered you so you were situated on one of his spread thighs and not his lap anymore. "y'gonna rub yourself on my thigh like the pathetic good girl you are, okay?"

you'd never done anything like this before.

suddenly you began to panic. "rafe, someone'll hear 'n―"

"nobody'll hear you, baby, jus' gotta be nice 'n quiet, yeah?" you still looked hesitant, top teeth clamping down on your bottom lip. "would make me feel so good, princess 'n you jus' wanna make me feel good, isn't that right? yeah, baby, jus' wanna make rafe feel good, you're such a good girl, aren't you?"

and you don't know how, why, or when but suddenly, you're doing just what he told you.

your hips are stuttering as they move against his jeans, you can feel your panties growing wetter and wetter with every jolt of movement.

rafe doesn't appear to be doing much, hands skillfully moving your hips while he leans back against the armchair.

"there you go, good girl." his cock twitched in his jeans, watching your hesitant, shy face as you moved oh so slowly on his jeans. "lift your hips f'me, sweetheart." you did as you were told, pausing to lift yourself up from his thigh. his hand moved beneath you, tugging your panties to the side and rubbing gentle circles against your clit.

"oh." fell so sweetly from your lips that to anybody else, it would have appeared almost innocent. but rafe was well aware of how dirty you really were.

he landed you back on his thigh, letting you rub yourself against him, this time, it was your bare pussy that ran up and down his jean-clad thigh.

he groaned at the sight of you, free hand coming down to fix his situation that was suddenly growing in his pants. he pulled at the jeans slightly, trying to make his growing bulge less noticeable but there was simply too much to hide.

your eyes cast down to his hand, then to the bulge and you found a little whimper leaving your mouth.

his eyes studied your face, watching you lick your already wet lips and rubbing yourself against him a little quicker. sweet, poor, innocent, you was so turned on by his growing dick. and he could feel it by the dampness of his jeans turning wet hot

you really were filthy.

a particularly loud whine left your lips and rafe realised that perhaps it wasn't a smart idea to start this whole thing off while his whole family was home.

but he couldn't stop now. that'd be cruel. especially seeing how worked up he'd gotten you.

he trailed his fingers up to your lips and tapped on your chin.

you didn't even need to be told, you simply opened up. he stuck his digits right in, feeling your flat tongue against them and spit coating them.

"so filthy, baby." he uttered so softly, as if he were complimenting you. "what'll we do with you, huh?" you only whimpered around his fingers. "'s okay, sweetheart, gonna get that pussy stuffed jus' like you want. just gotta be patient, yeah? can you do that f'me?"

and you're sloppy against his thigh, sloppy against his fingers. you can feel juices rubbing against his jeans and dribble forming at the gaps between your lips and all you can do is not so dumbly.

a stutter of your hips.

a grin on his lips.

"you gonna cum, already, huh?" it didn't take long, but you were already approaching your orgasm. he wished now more than ever that he could take pictures with his mind. that he could frame this moment and pull it out every time his dick got hard. he slipped his fingers out from your mouth. "gotta ask like a good girl before you cum."

your hands pawed at his shoulders. "please, rafe." your mind was turned to mush. "please, please, please."

he shrugged so cruelly. "'m hearin' a lot of beggin' but i don't hear you asking me yet."

"p-please, can i cum?" your face was red hot, embarrassment flooding your features quickly. "please?"

he smirked, leaning back against the armchair and removing his hands from your waist. you were a big girl, you could finish yourself off. "go on, princess."

he watched as your hands pawed at him, hips stuttering and eyes rolling backwards, mouth falling open. it was such a pronographic, filthy scene. and yet, he knew by tomorrow, you'd be prancing around in the same little dress and everyone would see you as the same lovely good little girl that you pretended to be.

and rafe thought that was enough to make him cum in his own pants.

[hcneymooners]

⋆ beg until i'm in.

ambessa x wife!reader. men and minors dni.

synopsis: you and ambessa are estranged wives, but are you really estranged if she refuses to divorce you, and every time you see each other, you can't help but fall into bed?

cw: light angst, emotional hurt/comfort, getting back together, top ambessa medarda, dom/sub, dom ambessa medarda, she has soft spot for you, pleasure dom ambessaaaaa, just for you though, strapping, rough sex, rough body play, hair-pulling, name-calling, pet names, lesbian sex, dildos, vaginal sex, cunnilingus, overstimulation, she is strapping you down, you will not be walking, cock worship, blow jobs, the strap is the cock in question no men i swear to god, mommy kink, praise kink, mating press, age difference, older woman/younger woman, marriage, she does not play about you, realizing this might have slight primal play, orgasm edging, begging, spanking, impact play notes: i am a FREAK about this woman. also i wrote this for @sheloveschai because she has been bringing me joy through their work and i want to do the same.

“she thinks i’m a monster.”

the words hung in the air, dense as the afternoon heat, heavy as ambessa’s head in your lap. how you’d ended up here—her armor gone, her weight so familiar—felt like one of those moments you’d look back on, trying to pin down the thread that led you here. you couldn’t.

your lives were separate. estranged wives, that’s what you told yourself. she wouldn’t divorce you, and you weren’t exactly rushing to draw up the papers. but estrangement was such a tidy, convenient word like the absence between you both was clean and intentional. it wasn’t. she blurred the edges every time she showed up unannounced, stepping into the space she left behind like it still belonged to her. and maybe it did.

she came today, her arrival marked by the low hum of her car pulling up the dirt road. the ranch was still, caught in that honeyed pause between afternoon and evening. the house she’d bought for you sat perched on its patch of green, neat but unpretentious—a porch for watching storms, white siding that seemed to glow in the late sun. the kind of place that felt like it had existed long before you arrived, waiting for someone to live in it properly. around it, the land stretched wide, unbroken except for the fences hemming in the garden you’d built with your own hands.

you were out there, barefoot and stubborn, locked in a battle with the soil. a carrot clung to the earth like it had something to prove, your hair slipping from its tie as you yanked at it, dirt smudged across your face from an earlier showdown with a deer that had dared to challenge your lettuce. the dress you wore—white, soft, and loose—shifted around you like a second skin, its ruffled straps falling to kiss your shoulders. it was stained at the hem, caught on brambles, but it moved with you, romantic in its simplicity, something that could’ve been borrowed from another life.

ambessa watched from the car. you didn’t notice her at first, too busy flailing after some audacious bit of wildlife, but she noticed you. her eyes followed the sway of your dress, the way the sun painted gold onto your skin, how your body moved with a kind of rawness that had always undone her. she waited because ambessa always waited. but there was a tension to it, like watching something she didn’t want to admit she needed.

hours later, she was here, sprawled in your lap like it was the most natural thing in the world. her hand rested against the fabric of your dress, her breathing slow but uneven. you stroked her hair without thinking, staring out at the horizon. the horses were grazing, lazy against the emerald sprawl. the ranch, her gift, felt heavier than it had in a while.

“at one point in time,” you said finally, the words tasting of truth, “every daughter views her mother as her monster.”

her hand stilled. you could feel her thoughts shifting, coiling like a tide just out of reach. she didn’t say anything, but the silence was loud, charged. you didn’t press her.

“you were always so hard on yourself,” you continued, your voice quiet but steady. “you can be… strong, stubborn, cruel. i’ve felt it. i know it. so much of your decision-making is absolute like the world is this black-and-white chessboard you’re determined to win on. there’s no room for anyone else in that kind of thinking. it can be stifling. but—” you hesitated, fingers idly brushing the hem of your dress as you tried to hold her gaze.

“love is always the basis when it comes to the people you care about: mel, kino—”

“you,” she interjected softly, her voice barely audible but so certain it almost startled you.

you hummed in agreement, the corners of your mouth tugging into an easy smile.

“me,” you admitted, your chest tightening at the confession. you sighed, the sound carrying years of ache. “your problem is that you don’t believe we can love you back. not really. you think we can’t be safe with you. so you send us away, like that’s protecting us. you decide things for us—these big, sweeping decisions—and suddenly we’re standing outside looking in, strangers in our own lives with you.”

you paused, thinking of her daughter. “mel’s a teenager. she’s going to buck against you because that’s what teenagers do. you have to let her. you can’t control everything, ambessa. we don’t learn any other way.”

ambessa watched you, her face unreadable but her eyes dark and intent. her voice was indescribably tender when she spoke.

“you’re such a wonderful stepmother.”

the word made you scoff. you pushed her—gently but firmly—off your lap and rose to your feet. she let you, though her eyes lingered on you. she could never let go entirely.

“don’t let her hear you say that,” you muttered, shaking your head.

mel had not taken your marriage to her mother well. and really, who could blame her? you were more than half ambessa’s age. you’d once been mel’s peer at university, brushing shoulders in the same circles without a clue that your lives would one day intertwine like this. to make matters worse, mel hadn’t even learned of the relationship from her mother or you. no, she’d found out by walking in on the two of you in a position that still made your cheeks burn to think about.

what followed was relentless: the icy distance, the sharp words, the careful avoidance. love, for you, had always been hard, but this was a different kind of difficulty. you’d tried to explain yourself to mel, fumbling for words that didn’t sound hollow. you told her you loved her mother simply because you did. it wasn’t about their wealth or their influence. you’d come from nothing—a small town with a crumbling church, miles of barren land, and a quiet resignation to a life of struggle. you were used to living hard and mean, to fending for yourself.

but ambessa… she had swept into your life with the force of a storm. she needled at you, chipped away at your shell until you were belly-up and tender, soft between her teeth. you were an easy kill in her hunt, and she was ruthless, selfish, and she could be so fucking mean. but none of that mattered.

you loved her with the kind of blind devotion that defied reason, and you couldn’t imagine doing anything else. being her wife was your greatest pride, and tending to her was your guiltiest pleasure.

mel couldn’t understand that, and the rift between you grew wider with each passing day. then came the public’s growing animosity toward the medarda family, the rising tensions, and ambessa made one of her absolute decisions. the separation blindsided you. you’d cried so hard you blacked out in the hall, and when you woke, you left without looking back. you thought mel wouldn’t care.

which is why you were shocked when ambessa brought you mel’s request for your perspective.

you turned toward the stove, busying yourself with the rhythm of dinner prep. it was easier to focus on the small, manageable things—chopping vegetables, lighting the flame—than to meet her gaze.

“she doesn’t hate you, [name],” ambessa said suddenly, her voice calm but insistent.

you froze, the knife hovering mid-air before you carefully set it down and turned on the stove.

“you staying for dinner?” you asked carefully.

you heard her shift behind you, felt the warmth of her body as she closed the space between you. her arms circled your waist, firm but gentle, and you shivered, instinctively leaning into her. god knows you were never the strongest soldier. she pressed a kiss to your temple, her lips lingering just long enough to make you melt.

“i admit,” she murmured, her voice low and quiet, “i had other motives for coming here.”

“bessa,” you began.

ambessa held you tighter, her lips brushing against your temple, the warmth of her breath sending shivers down your spine. her silence stretched just long enough for you to grow uneasy, but then she spoke, her voice low and thick with emotion.

“they’ve been asking for you,” she said, her hands smoothing over your waist.

you stiffened slightly, unsure if you’d heard her correctly.

“who?”

“mel. kino.” she pressed another kiss to your temple, then let her forehead rest against the side of your head. “they’ve been pleading with me to bring you back. they won’t admit it outright—god forbid they ever say they were wrong—”

you shot her a look.

“—but they’ve missed you. and they hate the way i’ve been without you. they say i’m different when you’re there.”

your breath hitched, your chest tightening with a mix of disbelief and something dangerously close to hope.

“they don’t even like me,” you murmured, your voice cracking.

“that’s not true.” ambessa’s tone softened, her grip on you tightening like she was afraid you might slip away. “they’re too proud to say it, but they’ve developed a soft spot for you despite everything. they miss you as much as i do.”

you turned your head slightly, just enough to catch the edge of her expression—open, raw, and devastatingly honest. by instinct, you lifted a hand and cradled her face. you hated it when she was sad.

“oh, bessa.”

“i’ve realized,” she continued, her voice dropping to a near whisper, “that i am nothing without you. i thought i was protecting you by letting you go, but i was wrong. i’m tired, my love. tired of waking up alone. tired of pretending i don’t need you. i do. god, i do.”

you felt a weight lift from the depths of your body. you’d waited so long to hear this—to feel wanted, needed, like you weren’t just a fleeting chapter in her life. tears welled up, and before you could stop them, they spilled over, hot and fat.

ambessa turned you in her arms, her hands coming up to cup your face as you began to cry in earnest.

“oh, sweetheart,” she murmured, her thumbs brushing away your tears. “don’t cry. please don’t cry.”

“i don’t want to do this anymore,” you choked out between sobs, clutching at her arms like she was the only thing keeping you upright. you pressed down on the thick cords of muscle, pleading with the strength of your grip. “i don’t want the house or any of this shit. i’m so tired of taking care of myself, ambessa. i just want to come home.”

her expression crumpled, and for a moment, you saw a vulnerability in her that she rarely let show.

“i’m sorry,” she said, her voice tight. “i’m so sorry, my love. i never should have let you go. i’ll make it right—i swear to you. i’ll spoil you, take care of you, and keep you forever. you’re mine, [name], and i’ll never let you forget it again.”

you sobbed harder, your face burying into her chest as her arms enveloped you completely.

“i know, baby. you did so well. i’m so proud of you,” she murmured.

she continued to whisper soft reassurances, mantras of “sweetheart,” “my sweet girl,” and “my sweet baby,” until the tears slowed and your breathing evened out. you shuddered against her, refusing to remove yourself from where you were pressed tightly against her chest. she shifted, and you jolted—fingers splaying desperately across her body.

“shh. i’m just making us more comfortable,” she told you.

the two of you moved, a single weeping entity across the floor of the kitchen into the living room. ambessa settled you on the couch, continuing to trace a hand across the landscape of your back.

“come back with me,” she murmured, her lips brushing against your hair. “let me take care of you. let me love you the way you deserve, hmm?”

you nodded against her, your hands clutching at the fabric of her shirt like a lifeline.

“that's all i want. i never stopped loving you,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

“i know,” she said, tilting your face up to hers.

the kiss she gave you was desperate and all-consuming, a culmination of every time you had woken and found yourself alone. her hands roamed over your hips and your waist, pulling you closer as if the space between you was unbearable. you gasped into her mouth, and she deepened the kiss.

“i’ve missed you,” she murmured against your lips, her voice low, rough with hunger. “did you miss me?”

you shivered, your body instinctively pressing into hers.

“yes. yes, i did. i swear, bessa,” you insisted, your voice trembling.

“shh, my love,” she said, her lips trailing down your jaw to your neck to soothe you. “i believe you. a sweet girl like you wouldn’t lie to me.”

with a groan, she lifted you, guiding you toward the bedroom, her hands never straying from your body, her kisses growing more frantic. when your back hit the bed, she hovered over you, her gaze dark, possessive. a hand came down to cup your cunt, firm and promising.

“yes or no?” she asked.

she only asked out of respect. ambessa had long ago perfected the art of taking what she wanted. you found you didn’t mind. it was easier this way, surrendering to her because she knew your body—your needs—better than you ever could. in her hands, the pressure of choice vanished. you trusted her to always know what was best.

suddenly, you were reminded of when she proposed. you felt the same now as you had then—wide-eyed, carnivorous. gently, you pulled her closer, brushing your lips against hers. the room smelled of apple blossoms and her intoxicating scent.

“yes,” you whispered, your voice barely a breath.

satisfied, she lowered her mouth back to your neck. at that moment, you could have mistaken her for a vampire—hunting for your pulse, for that line of forever-promised blood.

· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·

“ambessa.”

“hmm?” she answered, her hand tightening where it reigned on the nape of your neck.

she had you face down with your ass up, her other hand holding you at the small of your back as she thrust into you. you let out a high moan as she began to move faster, her cock moving deeper as you bore down on her.

“you feel so fucking good, sweetheart. so tight and sweet for me. it’s almost as if you haven’t been touched in a long while.”

“bessa—” you choked out, and she let out a laugh.

“oh, baby. i know that’s not true.” bending forward to brace herself on the bed, she began to pump into you. “you were always so hungry for it, so eager. i know you’ve probably stuffed yourself every single night since i’ve been gone.”

you whimpered, drool beginning to spill from your lips.

“but it didn’t feel like this, did it?”

“no,” you answered, squealing as ambessa brought a hand down on your ass. “no, baby. i can’t take care of myself like you do.”

“no,” she agreed. “you can’t. you just get so stupid when you’re fucked. you have no chance of doing this alone. not well, at least.”

“bessa, please,” you mewled.

with a bored sigh, she tightened her grip around your band of hair and yanked your head back, pounding into you with predatorial precision. you moaned as she began to focus on your g-spot, pulling your head back roughly to further increase her control.

“shit, bessa. fuuuuuck.”

“yeah?”

all thoughts were being fucked out of your head. you managed to get a hand on your clit, rubbing furiously to add stimulation.

“uh, uh, uh. oh, fuck. holy shit. ambessa, fuck. please, baby. please don’t stop.”

for a moment, she paused, and you remembered how cruel she could be. tenderly, she turned you over on your back and slid back in, placing your hands on the back of your thighs so that you were holding yourself open. with a grunt, she sunk deep until her hips were once again clapping against your ass.

a strong hand came down, fingers hooking into your mouth and tugging till she could see your teeth. you felt like an animal.

“stop fucking talking,” she told you, and you nodded, spit slicking all over your mouth and her fingers. “good girl.”

the praise settled on you, and you moaned weakly. her next thrust hit you like a line of coke. she was pressing into you, working for something. you weren’t sure what, but you could feel the way she was aiming to break you in.

“come on,” she murmured, retracting her fingers to grope roughly at your tits. “say it.”

your brow furrowed, and she came to a slow, gradual stop. sliding out, ambessa crawled onto the bed and placed a hand on your chest. you watched her, eyes large and glittering with tears. her breasts hung heavy over you, ripe and full with age. you wanted to suck and bite her nipples till she was shaking on the bridge of your nose, pussy-deep into your throat.

carefully, she slipped the holster from her hips and removed the girthy dildo from where it sat, slick with your heat and arousal.

“maybe this will jog your memory,” she said, and you didn’t have a moment to think before her cock was in your mouth.

you choked loudly, but she paid you no mind. with a few circular motions of her wrist, she made you deepthroat every inch, her eyes darkening as you audibly gagged and sucked on it. you ran your tongue over the artificial veins, getting it as wet as possible.

you were tasting yourself, strawberry sweet with a hint of bitterness and slight musk. you could feel your cunt pulsing, fluttering as ambessa’s eyes grew darker. she prohibited you from letting your legs down, and your thighs were burning, sweat garnishing your skin with a light sheen.

you felt so exposed, so debased like this: holding yourself wide and open while gagging like a well-trained whore on the toy.

“remember now?” she asked, and you breathed hard through your nose.

you were trying, bless you, to remember, and she dropped a kiss on your cunt for the effort.

“look at this pussy, sweetheart. fuck, baby.” ambessa lifted from where she’d been dragging her free hand through your folds. her fingers were soaked. “you’re rinsing me.”

something about her tone jogged your memory, and suddenly, you knew what she wanted to hear. in your excitement, you whined, and she met your gaze. she considered you and then removed her cock from your mouth.

“mommy,” you breathed, and she smiled, her face warm and rivaling the sun.

“that’s it,” she said, pride drenching the words. “good job, sweet girl. you deserve a reward.”

you beamed and wiggled your pussy in silent demand. ambessa laughed at your eagerness, bending to kiss you. her lips trailed lower till she was mouthing over the sopping mound of your count. around and around, her tongue wet, her teeth softly grazing your clit. you snapped upward, letting go of your legs and clutching at her braids instead.

“goddamnit, ambessa! fuck!”

she continued to eat you out, shaking her head and sucking loudly. still, she found time to pinch the inside of your thigh in reprimand.

“that’s not my name, sweet girl. i won’t tell you again.”

“fuck. fuck, i’m sorry. i’m sorry, mommy. just—please.” your voice cleaved in the middle. “please, i need to cum. i want to cum so bad for you, mommy. let me. please just let me—”

with a wet pop, ambessa broke away from your swollen pussy and looked at you. you breathed heavily, eyes caught on the way she gazed at you from between your legs.

“nothing is stopping you, my love. do what pleases you.”

she lowered down again and spat right into your cunt. you let your head fall back.

“i told you,” she said. “i plan to spoil you. this will only be your first.”

and with that, she suctioned her mouth around your rosy pussy and sucked, pointing her tongue and slipping inside of you. you came with a high wail, legs clamping around her head as you bowed over her. you felt light-headed, slit open, and destroyed.

and true to her nature, ambessa never stopped.

© hcneymooners.

[ohbueckers]

HEART OF A WOMAN. she has choices she should make i think she’s choosing it right now.

09, CHAPTER NINE. LET ME GO.

ju speaks. i sincerely apologize for the delay on this. i still think it’s poorly written despite the fact that i rewrote it so many times but i needed to get it out lol. i’m breaking hearts but i promise you’ll be somewhat satisfied with the ending. features some more crash out paige but more in a player’s prayer type of way… alsooo please vote on this. pairing. wnba!paige bueckers x female!oc. warnings. angst, maya appearance (she comes in peace)???

flashback, july 2022.

it feels like another lifetime—back when everything was louder, sharper. we were at that point where the distance between us wasn’t just physical but emotional, and it seemed like every call was another argument.

i almost didn’t make it to nai’s birthday in la that year. she was already stuck there because of her internship, and it was the one time she really wanted me there. we’d fought for days leading up to it, about God knows what, as usual. it always started with something small, like a misunderstanding or something i said without thinking, and then it snowballed. the kind of arguments that made you feel like you were suffocating in your own words, digging your heels in just to avoid apologizing.

but then… it was her birthday, and i couldn’t stand the thought of missing it, even though we couldn’t seem to stay on the same page. i almost said, fuck it, and didn’t go. but i knew i would regret it, so i pulled myself together and got on that damn plane.

i was in connecticut, locked into summer workouts with the team, drowning in exhaustion, trying to get through the motions and keep myself healthy. i kept putting off calling her, though, too busy wallowing in the mess we’d made, thinking about how far away we were, how it was easier to fight than make up.

but then that morning came. i called her in the middle of my frustration, half-hoping she’d just pick up and yell at me because, hell, i didn’t know how else to make things right. and when she did, when she finally answered and said she was waiting for me, everything felt like it clicked into place again.

we barely got to speak that day. the others were around, laughing, singing, but all i could do was watch her. nai. there she was, sitting across from me, a quiet storm in the way she held herself. i could’ve sworn everything about her felt like home in that moment, even when it was all so messed up. and when they started singing “happy birthday,” she was still just the only damn thing i could focus on. how she looked. how she sounded. how she made everything feel like it was meant to be, even when we were fighting for our lives.

i was supposed to be done with her. more importantly, she was supposed to be done with me. i told myself that a million times. but the truth was, the more she tried to leave it all behind, the harder it got to stay away.

and all i could think was, i’m not done with you. i’m never going to be done with you.

present day, july 2025.

“you still watching her?”

rickea’s voice broke through, her sneakers squeaking against the court as i dribbled my ball against the hardwood almost absentmindedly. it’s a game day. crew is here, some of the team, but kea, cam and i had been about an hour earlier than shoot around just for the hell of it.

“i’m not watching her,” i snapped back with a low grunt, lining up my jumper. it bounced right off the rim, almost to taunt me, and i didn’t miss the way rickea’s smirk widened. my head isn’t in this game. it probably won’t be by the time seven rolls around either.

i was watching. too hard. nai had noticed only once, and instead of waving me off or sending me a smile, she looked away and pretended it didn’t even happen.

“yeah, okay. so how’d you know i was talking about nai?”

i shot kea a side glance, annoyed that she’d even said her name out loud. “got her there,” cam chimed in, strolling over from the other side of the court with her own ball. she leaned against it, watching me with an all-too-knowing grin. “you two been a little quiet lately.”

i hesitated for just a second. not long enough for anyone else to notice—at least, i hoped not—but just enough to think about the silence between nai and me. quiet wasn’t even the word for it. it was like being stuck in a purgatory i couldn’t escape, knowing exactly what i wanted to say but being too damn scared to say it.

i hated how easily my thoughts drifted to her, even now, with kea and cam prying at me. i could still feel the last conversation we had replaying in my head—the way her words had cut deeper than she probably even realized. she probably didn’t even mean for them to. she said it like she didn’t. no more half-steps.

i know what i want.

i don’t know if i’m capable of getting it and keeping it.

and i couldn’t keep expecting her to wait around for me to figure it out.

“it’s called being busy,” i shot back, offering a forced smile that would hopefully get them off my back. it didn’t. “you know, prepping for a game? the thing we’re all ‘posed to be doing right now?”

“yeah, we’re busy,” cam said, dragging out the word like it was some great revelation. “but you’re distracted, and we know why.” she raised an eyebrow, looking like she was having way too much fun at my expense. “when was the last time you two even talked?”

“oh, wait,” kea interjected, putting a hand to her ear like she was trying to remember something. “was it that awkward ‘hi’ in the tunnel yesterday? or did you manage a full sentence this time?”

“ha, ha,” i deadpanned, dribbling my ball almost aggressively to drown them out. “check up, bro. let’s see who’s focused,” i said with the smuggest smile on my face, tossing the ball to rickea and squaring up in front of her.

“you’ve got a lot of nerve for someone who been bricking shots all morning,” kea pointed an accusatory finger at me, and i rolled my eyes, pulling up my joggers.

“less talk.”

she jab-stepped left, then tried to blow past me, but i was ready, cutting her off with a quick shuffle to the side. “nah,” i mumbled, poking the ball loose and snagging it before she could recover. “try again next time.”

“you’re feeling yourself now, huh?” kea challenged, jogging back to defend as i dribbled toward the hoop.

“always,” i shot back, faking right before crossing over to my left. i breezed past her and went up for an easy layup, the ball spinning perfectly off the backboard before dropping through the net.

as soon as my feet hit the ground, i turned to cam, sticking my tongue out at her like a kid who just won a playground game, sticking a big, fat ‘L’ on my forehead. “too slow!” i said, grinning as i jogged backward toward the three-point line.

“one layup isn’t a highlight reel!”

i was about to fire back when it happened—nai walked by on the sideline, clipboard in hand, her focus seemingly on the players warming up. but just as i turned to look, she glanced my way and caught me mid-stare. she didn’t look away this time, and before i could think too much about it, she gave me a smile. not one of her usual polite, professional smiles, but something softer. brief but intimate, just enough to pull me in and spit me right back out when she turned away again. it was so quick, i almost convinced myself it didn’t happen.

my heart did this annoying little flip, and i nearly tripped over my own feet as i turned back to the game. the ball rickea had passed came flying toward me, smacking me lightly in the chest.

“oh, my God, we lost her again.”

the door to the supply room squeaked as i nudged it open with my shoulder, balancing a stack of extra towels in one hand and my clipboard in the other. game days were always crazy—organized crazy, thanks to me—but i was good at it. every minute was accounted for, every detail triple-checked. there was no room to think about anything else, and i liked it that way.

setting the towels on the shelf, i glanced down at my clipboard, double-checking the inventory count against my list. the sound of faint footsteps caught my attention, and i glanced over my shoulder. my heart dropped—i think to my ass—when i saw her.

maya.

she hovered in the doorway, hands shoved into her jacket pockets, her expression hesitant. it was a strange look for her—maya never hesitated. she moved like she always knew exactly where she stood, always so sure. but now? now she just looked… conflicted. i think everything that happened knocked her down a notch.

my first instinct was to tell her to leave, but i refrained. “hey,” i said finally, turning fully to face her. my eyes narrowed slightly as i studied her. “what’s up?”

she stepped inside, letting the door click shut behind her, and suddenly the room felt smaller. “can we talk for a second?” she asked, shifting on her feet.

i leaned back against the shelf, crossing my arms over my chest. “talk about what?”

maya hesitated, her eyes flickering to… well, everything but me before meeting mine again. “about everything,” she said softly, almost like she wasn’t sure the words would come out. “about… you, me, paige. all of it.”

“you don’t have to do this.”

“i think i do,” she replied quickly, almost too quickly, like she’d been waiting for the chance to say it. “i just… i wanted to say i’m sorry, nai. for everything. for how it all played out.”

i studied her for a moment, trying to gauge how much of this was for me and how much of it was for her. “i should’ve told you.” still, it was hard to hold onto any lingering anger when she looked at me like that—like she genuinely meant it. “about me and paige. i shouldn’t have kept it from you, maya. that was fucked up.”

maya’s lips pressed into a thin line, her eyes dropping to the floor for a moment. “yeah,” she said softly, almost like she hadn’t expected me to admit it. “maybe. but i wasn’t exactly innocent either.” she glanced back. “i should’ve walked away when i realized.”

“realized what?” i asked, tilting my head, though i already had a feeling i knew the answer.

her laugh was small, humorless. “i mean… it was obvious, nai.”

i froze, still gaining the nerve to ask, “obvious how?”

maya raised a brow, a faint smirk tugging at her lips. “oh, you’re serious.” she shook her head lightly, as if the answer should’ve been clear. “even when you weren’t saying it out loud, it was all over your faces. the way you talked to each other, the way you didn’t.”

i feel terrible. “maya—“

“it’s not a dig,” she interrupted, holding up her hands. “it’s just… the way you two are. it’s not something you can really hide, nai. trust me, i tried to ignore it. thought maybe i was overthinking or projecting or whatever. but i wasn’t.”

i swallowed, hard, trying to find the right words, but nothing felt like enough. maya sighed, leaning back against the door like she was anchoring herself there.

“look,” she said, softening her words up as if i was fragile. “i get it. you don’t owe me anything. but i wanted to tell you that i talked to paige.”

my head snapped up at that, her name alone making my heart skip. “you did?”

maya nodded, her eyes steady on me. “on the phone a few nights ago. i needed to get it off my chest, you know? everything that went down… it was a mess. and i don’t think paige even realized how much of it was on her until we talked.”

i nodded, and she continued.

maya squinted at me. “paige said she loves you.” the words didn’t sound new. paige had been telling me she’s loved me since high school—sometimes with her words, sometimes with her actions, and sometimes in the quiet spaces between. so why did it strike me like a blow this time? “and i believe her. but… i don’t know. does it ever feel like she only tries when she’s scared you’ll leave?”

my breath caught, and for a moment, i couldn’t think of anything to say. the question wasn’t meant to hurt me—at least, it didn’t feel that way—but it landed right where it was supposed to. deep, direct, in the places i tried not to think about too much. i was immediately defensive. “you can’t—“

maya tilted her head slightly, studying me like she was trying to figure out how much of this i already knew. “maybe not. but it’s worth asking, isn’t it?”

i wanted to deny it. to tell her she didn’t understand, that she didn’t see the weekends during college, the little moments that no one else got to witness. the times when paige showed up, not because she was scared of losing me but because she wanted to be there.

but maya wasn’t entirely wrong, was she? there were times when it felt like paige’s love came in waves—strong and all-encompassing when the fear of losing me loomed, and quieter, more distant, when she felt secure. it wasn’t that she didn’t love me; it was just… complicated.

“she tries,” i said finally, convincing myself of it. “paige does try. maybe it’s not perfect, but she loves me. i know that.”

maya’s lips pressed into a thin line. “i just needed to say that. to let you know i’m sorry for my part in all of this. and… i hope it works out. for you and paige.”

i could see the sincerity in her eyes. she wasn’t here to stir the pot or make things worse. she was here because she cared, even if her timing was terrible.

“thanks,” i said finally, my voice barely above a whisper.

and then she was gone, leaving me alone in the supply room with her words ringing in my ears. i leaned back against the shelf, closing my eyes as the weight of it all settled over me.

maya’s voice played on a loop in my mind: paige only knows how to love when she’s afraid of losing something.

and for the first time, i wondered if maya was right.

i’d gotten to the office earlier than usual, telling myself it was because i had work to do. but really, i just wanted to be alone. birthdays used to mean something, but now they felt more like a reminder of how much had changed. the kind of day where you couldn’t help but take stock of everything and everyone in your life—who was still there, who wasn’t, and who only came around when it suited them.

my desk was a mess of papers and sticky notes i didn’t feel like sorting through. i kept staring at my laptop screen, pretending to work while my mind wandered. i thought about the flowers that would probably show up later from people i barely spoke to. the texts i’d get from coworkers who’d remember because of a calendar alert. and, of course, i thought about paige.

the no-contact rule was still in place, and even though i knew she was respecting it, part of me still wondered if that was her way of playing it safe. keeping distance until she was sure i wasn’t going anywhere. that had always been how it felt between us, and i couldn’t help but think that today, of all days, would be the one day she might break the silence.

and i was right. “we can make an exception for a national holiday, right?” she teased.

there she was, leaning in the doorway, a bouquet of flowers in her hands. her grey nike tech was speckled with rain droplets, her hood pulled up but not doing much to hide the strands of blonde hair sticking to her forehead. still, her eyes found mine instantly, scanning me like she was trying to read me before i even said a word.

“paige,” i dragged out, my name on her lips almost like a scolding, but the slow upturn of my smile completely gave me away.

she bit back her own grin, her lip caught between her teeth. “happy birthday, nai.”

i stood up, the flowers still in her hand as i crossed the space between us. she handed them to me without a word, and i hugged her almost instinctively. she was still damp from the rain, but it didn’t matter.

“you’re very early,” i said into her shoulder, my words muffled.

“nah, this is perfectly timed,” she replied, pulling back slightly but keeping her hands on my shoulders. her thumbs pressed gently into them like she knew how tense i’d been all morning. “besides, i didn’t wanna risk showing up and missing you.”

i rolled my eyes playfully. “you think i’d skip out on my own birthday?”

she smirked. “i dunno. you don’t exactly seem excited about it.”

“hmm,” i paused, screwing my eyes shut as i leaned into the massage. “it’s too early to be excited,” i shot back.

“fair,” she settled, tilting her head as her thumbs hit just the right spots. “nika and them flyin’ in today.”

that pulled a genuine smile at me. she mentioned it a bit ago, how some of her old teammates would be coming to see her play soon. “yeah? when’re they landing?”

“this afternoon. nika texted me last night about it,” paige said, and i can’t help but think about how good we are at this small talk thing. it’s so easy to get lost in what feels normal. “we play storm in two days, so… figured we’d spend some time together before the game.”

i nodded, knowing nika had been one of the constants in paige’s life since their freshman year at uconn, and i’d always admired the way their friendship seemed to hold its own weight, no matter what else was happening around them.

“i’m assuming you wanna see them,” paige added.

“duh,” i replied easily, cracking one eye open to give her a pointed look.

“i’ll set sum’ up,” she replied, and i nodded. her hands stayed on my shoulders, pausing just long enough to tap them before stepping back. “you good? you seem… off.”

i hesitated, caught off guard by the question even though i shouldn’t have been. paige had always been good at reading me, sometimes better than i wanted her to be. “yeah,” i said quickly, too quickly. “just… long morning already.”

“mmhm,” she replied, clearly unconvinced, but she didn’t push. instead, she leaned against the edge of my desk, her hands slipping into the pockets of her hoodie.

“you sure?” she asked again after a moment, and i knew i wouldn’t be getting away with saying nothing.

she stated at me, and i found my lies slipping away. my mouth fell wider with each passing second, and when her eyes darted to my lips, i seemed to snap up out of it, busying myself with the tax of fixing an already perfect vase of flowers onto my desk. “i just—i talked to maya.”

i could hear paige shift in front of me before letting out a quiet chuckle. “okay,” she said, dragging the word out like she already knew where this was going. “what she say?”

her tone was casual, but when i looked up at her fully turned figure, she had that look in her eyes—guarded, careful, like she was already bracing herself. “nothing bad,” i started, furrowing my eyebrows. “just… stuff about us. about how things went down.”

paige raised a brow, crossing her arms over her chest as she tilted her head slightly. “uh-huh. like what?”

“like how it always feels like you only show up when you’re afraid of losing something.”

i couldn’t help but watch her, waiting for her reaction. for her to say something, anything.

paige’s posture shifted immediately, her arms tightening over her chest as her lips pressed into a thin line. “you letting her feed you bullshit again, nai?” she asked.

“don’t do that. it’s not bullshit,” i replied. “it’s how it feels sometimes.”

“to who? you?” she challenged, taking a step closer. her eyes searched mine, narrowing slightly, but there was no malice in them—just frustration. “or maya? ’cause she loves spinning her little stories, and you know that.”

“paige.” i sighed, shaking my head as i tried to keep the conversation from spiraling. i didn’t exactly want to argue. “this isn’t about maya. it’s about me, about us.”

“nah, you just said you talked to her,” paige shot back, gesturing vaguely toward me. “and now you’re standing here like she knows me better than you do. like she knows us better than we do,” she argued, adding a, “c’mon, that’s not fair.”

“isn’t it, though?” i asked, meeting her gaze head-on. “you’re here now, but only because it’s my birthday. because you knew i’d expect you to show up.”

paige’s eyes flickered away for a split second, down to her pocket, before snapping back to mine. “you really think that’s the only reason i’m here?”

i didn’t say anything. i didn’t need to—the look on my face must’ve told her everything.

her shoulders dropped slightly, and she let out a humorless laugh, shaking her head. “that’s crazy, nai. you know that’s crazy, right?”

“it’s not about how i see you, pai—“

her expression had hardened, like she’d put up a wall i couldn’t reach past. “you know what? maybe you’re right. maybe this whole thing is just me showing up when it’s convenient.”

“you know that’s not what i meant.”

“nah,” she cut me off, stepping back toward the door. “if that’s how you feel, then what am i even doing here? clearly, it don’t matter.”

“it does matter,” i said quickly, but the words didn’t seem to land. fuck, i’m an idiot.

“not to you, it don’t,” she replied, her voice clipped. she paused for a second, her hand on the doorknob, before turning back to look at me. “it’s cool. you got your flowers. happy birthday, nai.”

and just like that, she was gone. the click of the door felt louder than it should’ve, and i stood there, staring at the empty space she left behind, wondering how we managed to end up here—again.

“nai… she… fuck, nika.”

i swirled the half-melted ice in my glass. the bourbon wasn’t hitting the way i needed it to, but it was definitely hitting. i don’t drink fucking bourbon. i’m sure i’d drink about a gallon of it right now though. “we had this argument earlier. it’s like she doesn’t see how hard i’m trying, you know? like she’s convinced i only show up when i’m scared i’m losing her or something.”

nika leaned back in her seat, eyebrows raised. “those her words, or yours?” she asked, the corners of her mouth twitching.

“hers,” i mumbled, tipping the glass back for a too-big sip.

“damn.” right!?

i scrubbed a hand down my face, leaning into the bar like it could hold me up. my stomach twisted, and for once, it wasn’t from the alcohol. “she just—she don’t get it, you know? like, yeah, i fucked up before, but i’m trying now. i’m really trying, and she doesn’t even see it. she doesn’t even try to see it. at least i’m trying, like—“

“maybe ease up on the drink first before you start spiraling,” azzi cut in from the other side of the bar. she was nursing a soda, her judgmental stare boring into me like an older sister i didn’t ask for.

i shot her a glare. “you’re ‘posed to be team paige.”

“i am team paige,” she said, crossing her arms and smiling sweetly. i stuck my tongue out at her.

the bar in nika’s hotel was louder than i expected for a wednesday night. maybe it was the group of us taking up the corner table, or maybe it was just me being on edge. i felt like i was moving through the motions, laughing when everyone else did, nodding along to conversations i wasn’t really following.

it all started to show as soon as the alcohol kicked in. i could feel myself slipping, letting it take me to that reckless place i always ended up in when it came to her. i stared at my phone, the glow of the screen blurring slightly as i typed out another text. i didn’t care if she was out, if she was at her party surrounded by people who probably cared more than i ever showed. i just needed her to hear me.

and here i was, sitting in a damn hotel bar, drunk as hell, making everything worse just because i couldn’t leave her alone. but i texted.

and texted and texted and texted.

paige: so youure just gonna ignore me? 10:21pm

bet

paige: you wouldnr even be mad rn if you just let me fix it 10:24pm

but you don’t rven want to let me try bro

paige: i hate when we don’t talk 10:26pm

can we talk?

the words blurred slightly as i reread them, but i didn’t delete anything. instead, i kept going, typing out every thought that popped into my head, no matter how ridiculous it sounded.

paige: please baby jus wanna hear your voice 10:27pm

paige: i came w my mind made uo today 10:31pm

i just couldn’t sau it i’m so sorry

could’nt give it to you

delivered. delivered. delivered. not a single one read.

my phone buzzed in my hand, and for a second, i thought it was another notification. but no—her name lit up the screen, a call coming through. my heart jumped into my throat. i stared at it, frozen, until it rang out.

“shit,” i mumbled, fumbling with the phone as i stumbled out of my seat.

nika grabbed my arm to steady me. “where you going?”

“outside,” i mumbled, shoving my phone into my hoodie pocket.

the rain hit me as soon as i stepped out, the cold shocking enough to sober me up just a little. i ducked under the hotel’s awning, the noise of the rain hitting the roof above me almost drowning out the sound of my phone. my fingers shook as i called her back. the phone rang once, twice, three times before going to voicemail. i swore, pulling my hand into my jacket pocket.

well, the first call goes to voicemail.

the second one does too.

i try a third time, pacing.

finally, the line clicks. “paige,” nai says, and i can hear the hesitance in her voice. i can hear it, and i hate that i put it there.

“nai,” i breathe, her name coming out in a rush. the rain’s loud on my end, and i know she can hear it. “i—i’m sorry, okay? just—please don’t hang up. i had to talk to you. i can’t… i can’t keep doin’ this, fuck—“

“you’re drunk?” she asks flatly. i could hear the music in the background, and i conclude that she probably hadn’t seen my texts.

“you’re mad at me…” i continued. “i get it… i walked out on you, but you could barely look at me today, and—“

“paige, shut up. where are you?”

“outside nika’s hotel,” i muttered, wiping my face with my sleeve even though it didn’t help.

“stay there,” she said, and the line went dead.

a party hadn’t been my only surprise tonight. hell, it hadn’t been my only surprise of the entire day.

i should’ve been celebrating, right? enjoying the fact that people cared enough to throw me this party, that everyone had gathered in one place for me. but all i could think about was paige. and everything that came with her.

i hadn’t expected to hear from her at all tonight, let alone get the damn text messages that practically screamed desperation. though, half of me still passed on the alcohol for tonight as some kind of gut feeling. i knew she was drunk. i could tell from her words—hell, i could tell from the way she sent them in a blur, as if she couldn’t hold the phone still long enough to type a single coherent sentence.

i should’ve been upset. angry even. all those stupid things she’d done, all the mess she’d made, all the times she’d promised to change and then didn’t—it all came rushing back. i should’ve been furious. but there i was, standing in the middle of a damn party, my damn party, staring at my phone like it held the answers to every question i’d ever asked.

and then came the call.

it wasn’t even a question of if i would answer. i couldn’t not.

“nai,” her voice came through, shaky and full of guilt. “i—i’m sorry, okay? just—please don’t hang up. i had to talk to you. i can’t… i can’t keep doin’ this, fuck—”

i had to step away from the group. i couldn’t focus on anything but her voice, the sound of it cracking through the static, pulling at something deep inside me. the music in the background was too loud, but i heard every word she said.

“you’re drunk?” i asked, my voice flat, trying not to let the frustration leak through.

“you’re mad at me…” she trailed off, and i knew exactly where this was going.

her text messages had been pleading, full of “baby, please”s and “i’m sorry”s, but this? this felt different. it wasn’t just her trying to get me to forgive her. it was her trying to convince me to fully let her in again. it was her realizing i was slipping. again.

and there couldn’t have been any more confirmation.

i drove through the rain, the windshield wipers squeaking as they tried to clear the downpour. i pulled in front of the hotel’s awning, the lights from the sign reflecting on the wet pavement. i killed the engine and just sat there for a moment, my fingers gripping the steering wheel as i took a deep breath.

the knock on my window pulled me from my thoughts. i glanced up, and there was nika, standing in the rain, her coat pulled tightly around her. i rolled the window down just enough to hear her.

“she’s over there,” nika said, nodding towards the edge of the awning, her finger pointing to one of the hotel’s pillars. “she wouldn’t come inside or anything until you got here.”

i stared at the spot for a second. the rain was coming down so hard, the air was cold for it being summer, and paige was still out there, waiting. waiting for me. i didn’t know if that made it worse or better.

“thanks,” i muttered, forcing a tight smile. nika didn’t say anything else, just gave me a quick nod before heading back inside. i guess she figured this wasn’t a time for pleasantries.

i got out of the car, the rain immediately soaking through the jacket i threw over the nice blouse cam had gifted me. i could hear paige before i saw her, her voice cutting through the sound of the rain.

“nai, baby, look, i swear i didn’t mean to fuck everything up—”

“paige,” i interrupted. i couldn’t let her ramble on, not like this. “you don’t need to explain anything right now. just—”

“no, no, just listen! i’m so sorry,” she cut me off again. she took a step closer, and i pushed at her hips, trying to keep her at a distance. “i know i messed up. i know i fucked up, so many times. but—fuck, nai, i’m here. i’m here right now, and i’m gonna make this right. you don’t really believe maya, do you?”

this was a side of paige i hadn’t seen in a long time. she wasn’t trying to be strong, wasn’t trying to prove a point. she was just…asking.

“i believe you,” i stated plainly, avoiding her eyes as i tried to pull her toward the car.

paige’s shoulders dropped, her brows furrowing as she complied to my pulling. “you’re lying.”

i exhaled sharply, finally getting somewhere as i wrapped my fingers gently around her wrist. “i want you to get in the car.”

“i don’t… wanna get in the car, bro. i wanna talk.”

“we can talk in the car,” i insisted, not wanting to drag this out any longer. it was already too much.

paige dragged her feet along the pavement, her rambles continuing, making it harder to get her to the passenger seat in a timely matter. “you look so good tonight.” “fuck.” “i’m sorry for ruining your night.” “i didn’t mean to mess this up.”

finally, i opened the passenger door, and paige slid in with a small, unsteady huff, like she was relieved to be inside. i crouched down beside the door, lowering myself to her level as i reached for the seatbelt.

paige shifted slightly, still muttering under her breath, her words blurred together in the same cycle of regret and self-reproach. “i’m gonna fix this. i promise i will.”

“i don’t need you to,” i said, my voice barely above a whisper as i clicked the seatbelt into place, making sure it was secure. paige paused, and i tightened the strap for her, putting my focus solely on that.

“what? i know…” she hiccuped, shifting again as she tugged on the zipper of her jacket, scrunching her face up like the fabric had been bothering her. i reached out and helped her get it off her arms, the motion feeling almost automatic. “i haven’t been the best girlfriend, ex.. whatever.”

“it’s fine.”

“it’s not fine.” and she said it again, almost as if to tell the truth for both of us. “it’s not fine and… i’m gonna do right by you, swear, baby.” her words trailed off into another hiccup as she looked at me, her eyes pleading. i didn’t respond.

i’m sick of words. so sick of fucking words.

“did you have a good birthday?” she continued, her voice small now, and i could tell she was getting tired too. “i know i’ve been a mess—”

“it’s okay,” i said, my tone flat, trying not to let her guilt weigh on me. “we’ll talk when you’re sober.”

“nai, i just need to—” she started, but i cut her off, shaking my head.

“we can get everything straight… when you’re sober. not now.”

her face fell. “i got you a promise ring,” she blurted out, her eyes wide and frantic. “i was gonna give it to you. but i… i couldn’t. i couldn’t, nai, i was gonna do it today. i really was, but i didn’t know how.”

i was frozen for a moment. “what?” the word came out before i could stop it. i blinked, trying to process what she was saying. “promise ring? you… had a ring for me?”

i stayed silent, my chest tight as i processed everything she was saying. the ring, the flowers, her promises. it all felt like a cruel reminder of everything i had to let go. everything we had been and everything that we weren’t anymore.

paige hiccupped, the alcohol causing her words to slur further. “yeah… had it in my pocket. i came all ready to give it to you, but… i couldn’t. just couldn’t.”

“paige, stop it,” i finally whispered, my voice breaking slightly. i finally looked at her. really looked at her before attempting to get up. “you’re embarrassing yourself.”

her face faltered, but she didn’t let go of me, her hands trembling as she reached for my face, pulling me closer. “what do you want, nai?” the way she said it... “you want me to stop showing up? you want me to leave you alone? ‘cause i can do that. i can leave you alone. i can do that if that’s what you really want.” the way she pleads like she’ll do anything, has me on the verge of believing it.

my heart pounded in my chest. she was still holding onto this idea, this hope that i could come back. her eyes softened, and she leaned in closer, like she was trying to get through to me, but it felt suffocating.

“just let me go, paige,” i said, my voice hoarse. “let me go. please,” i muttered, lolling my head to try and get out of her grasp. i pressed my hand into her thigh, steadying myself on the ground.

her hands only gripped my face tighter, her thumb running over my jaw, her touch too familiar to the first time. too much.

silence. and then, “that’s what you want?”

i closed my eyes, trying to ignore the way her hands felt on my cheeks. the way her voice cracked, desperate and pleading, it hit something deep inside me. no, i wanted to say. no, i don’t want this. but living a lie had been outdated.

“yes,” i finally managed.

her thumb slid up under my eye, gently brushing away a tear that escaped. “look at me when you say it.”

no. no, no, no.

“look at me, nai. tell me you mean it,” she repeated.

i mean it. the words felt heavy, like they were being dragged out of me, but they were the only thing that made sense anymore.

i lifted my eyes slowly, meeting hers. “i mean it,” i said, barely a breath, but enough for her to hear. “i need you to let go, paige.”

for a moment, there was nothing but the sound of the rain against the pavement and our uneven breaths. her grip didn’t loosen at first, like she was weighing the words, like she was holding onto the last shred of something she didn’t want to let go of.

but then, just like that, she pulled her hands away from my face, the movement stiff and mechanical. her eyes became empty, almost like they were looking right through me. she didn’t say anything—didn’t try to argue, didn’t plead. she just withdrew, the shift in her demeanor so abrupt it was as if the weight of everything we had was just… gone.

“okay.”

i turned then, slowly at first, and then more decisively as i made my way back to the driver’s seat, the rain still coming down hard around us. i didn’t look back, even though i felt her eyes on me, even though i knew she was still there.

after so many tries, i realized i couldn’t do this again. i couldn’t let her in.

and for the first time in what felt like forever, i let go, and it felt… right?

[peppermintquartz]

Hondo comes into the locker room just as most of the others are going, and deliberately catches Deacon's eye. In case Deacon wants to play dumb, Hondo says, "Can we talk in private?"

Hondo sees the moment Deacon braces himself; he doubts anyone else but Luca might have noticed it. "Sure."

They find themselves someplace out of the way. Hondo steps closer and keeps his voice low. "Annie called Nichelle yesterday, crying. Deac, tell me it's not true what she said."

"Depends on what she said," Deacon replies. His face is blank; he knows how to play this game as well as anyone. It's going to be an uphill battle for Hondo, apparently.

Hondo glances around and, seeing no one else nearby, whispers fiercely, "Are you asking Annie for a divorce?"

"I told her I want a divorce, yes."

"Why? Deacon, the hell is going on? You and Annie are so great together," Hondo hisses, keeping an eye on possible eavesdroppers. The last thing he needs is this sort of gossip to spread, but he can't guarantee Deacon won't avoid him after work.

A bit of light sparring has started in the ring. 50-squad and 20-squad are both on shift, and Stevens and Tan are exchanging some good punches. Playing referee is Rocker, dancing around the combatants. Hondo looks over his shoulder and tugs Deacon a little further into the shadows.

Deacon sighs. "With all due respect, Hondo, that's my private life. And it's none of your business."

That's not wrong, but they've always been open about their family struggles since Deacon had money troubles.

"We're family, Deac. I'm not gonna judge, but I want to know what's going on."

"That's between me and Annie," Deacon replies, a note of warning in his tone. "It won't affect my work and it is of no concern of yours."

Hondo wants to press further but Hicks comes down the stairs at that exact moment with a furrowed brow and news of a jewelry heist gone wrong.

During the op, Deacon is his usual self: calm, cool and collected, his focus on the task at hand. Hondo has to force himself to do the same.

It feels strange to trust Deacon to have his back, while knowing that there's a wall Deacon's thrown up between them.

---

It takes Hondo six more days before he finds out the truth, by complete accident.

He's out buying fruit for his mom and pop when he sees Deacon crossing the road ahead, dressed in a dark jacket and a pair of light washed jeans. Hondo almost calls out to him but something gave him pause. Instead, he pays for the Asian pears and pulls on his shades, following Deacon from the other side of the road.

Deacon isn't looking around him but checking his phone. Then he enters a cafe. Hondo debates going in after him, but settles on waiting outside to the bakery opposite. Pretending to wait for someone and checking his watch now and again, he keeps an eye on Deacon, who is sitting at a window, smiling to himself. Then a familiar tall figure walks to the entrance of the cafe.

Rocker? Hondo hopes that Rocker's presence won't startle Deacon.

And then he sees Deacon standing to greet Rocker.

Maybe they're meeting for a security gig, Hondo thinks, starting to doubt himself, and then does a double take. Wait. Is Deacon kissing Rocker's hand?

The two men are gazing at each other, Rocker's left hand in Deacon's right, and Deacon has just pressed his mouth to the knuckles in a clearly romantic gesture.

His mind goes blank. Hondo doesn't know what to think.

All he sees is the happy, relaxed expression on the face of the man he trusts most in the world.

[storiesforallfandoms]

a winter night at rockefeller ~ jschlatt

word count: 1773

request?: no

description: in which he hates the big city, but he'll go wherever she wants him to go

pairing: jschlatt x female!reader

warnings: swearing, rpf, use of y/n

masterlist (one, two, three)

Most of what Schlatt said and did in his videos was exaggerated. Most content creators exaggerated themselves for the camera, but Schlatt very clearly had an online persona that was completely different to how he was in real life.

One thing that wasn't an exaggeration, though, was how much he hated the city.

When you're born and raised in New York, the place literally nicknamed "the city that never sleeps", people assume that you become accustomed to the big city life. Schlatt, however, absolutely hated the big city. He loved the state of New York, but he hated the crowds and the noise, and the hustle and bustle of New York City.

So when he found himself pushing through the dense December crowds, he was trying to keep himself calm. If it weren't for his beautiful girlfriend excitedly towing him along, he'd probably have lost it already.

Although, if it weren't for that same beautiful girlfriend, he wouldn't be here anyways.

(Y/N) had recently moved in with Schlatt in his house in New York after the two had been dating for two years. She knew how Schlatt felt about the big city, so she rarely ever asked him about going with her if she wanted to explore. She didn't mind going alone, or with Ted and Tucker whenever they visited. But when the snow started to fall, and New York started to look very Christmassy, she asked him to go to Rockefeller with her.

"I've always wanted to go skating there," she had told him. "You don't have to get on the ice with me. I'd just like you to come with me."

Despite her insistence that he didn't have to skate with her, Schlatt went out and bought himself skates, then he brought the two of them into the city.

They arrived at the Rockefeller ice rink and, predictably, the place was packed. There looked like there was no room on the ice at all. Schlatt tensed up. (Y/N) squeezed his hand.

"We don't have to skate yet," she said. "We can go get a hot chocolate or something first, then come back when it's cleared out a bit."

Schlatt gave her an amused look. "How chocolate?"

"Tis the season!"

He put his arm around her and pulled her close so he could kiss her head. "No, let's get on the ice so we can just get it over with. Then we can get hot chocolate to warm ourselves afterwards."

They made their way to the rink. As they changed into their skates, people started to steadily come off the ice. Schlatt had chosen to come down not late enough that it was dark yet, but enough that people would be getting ready to go home for dinner, especially people with kids. And he very much wanted to avoid any kids the most.

(Y/N) was ready before him, and she didn't wait for him before getting on the ice. He looked up in time to see her glide away from the door. He felt a smile tug at his lips. He stood, took a moment to steady himself, then moved to the edge of the ice. (Y/N) was already to the other side of the rink, easily gliding past anyone who she came upon. Even at this distance, Schlatt could see the smile on her face. Seeing her so happy put a smile on his own face.

Before he knew it, she was coming up to him again. She slowed herself down enough to take hold of the edge and stop completely next to Schlatt.

"Sorry," she said, although her smile was anything but apologetic. "I got a little ahead of myself."

"You failed to tell me you're a professional skater."

(Y/N) giggled and shook her head. "Definitely not professional. I always used to skate on the frozen pond by my house as a kid."

"Well, you're much better than I am. You're going to literally be skating circles around me."

(Y/N) put her hand out. Schlatt took it and slowly stepped onto the ice. He definitely wasn't as graceful as (Y/N) had been. The second one of his skates touched the ice, his leg was moving from underneath him. The hand that wasn't holding (Y/N)'s flailed as he helplessly tried to keep himself on his feet. (Y/N) grabbed for him. She was laughing as she helped him steady himself.

"Have you ever skated?" she asked.

"Not since I was in elementary school," he replied. "And I used to use those fuckin' skate guides. The plastic ones that were bright as fuck."

(Y/N) moved so she was right next to him. She looped her arm through his, resting her hand against his forearm. "Well, we'll just have to take it slow then. And if you fall, I'll go down with you."

Schlatt smiled at her.

They pushed away and started their skate. Schlatt was still holding on to the side with one hand. Whenever he stumbled a little, (Y/N) would tighten her grip on his arm to keep him from falling.'

Schlatt eventually noticed that they were going slow enough to be lapped by another couple.

"You know, if you want to skate ahead of me I wouldn't be mad," he told (Y/N). "I mean, this probably feels slower than a snail's pace for you."

"I don't mind going slow," she assured him. "I didn't come here to race around the rink. I came to skate with my boyfriend." She moved her hand to hold his and leaned into him. "Who I'm sure is hating every second of this."

Schlatt chuckled. "Only mildly."

Soon enough, they finally made a full lap around the rink. The sun was mostly gone, the rink was lit by the lights surrounding it. Most people had cleared out, so it was only them and a few other couples. Schlatt was stopped, leaning against the side of the rink. He looked down at (Y/N), who was gazing around the rink in awe. Schlatt couldn't help but smile at her. He reached out to pull her close to him - still trying not to fall over on the ice.

"Are you cold enough to get hot chocolate yet?" he asked.

She chuckled. "Oh, I was cold enough when we were walking from the subway."

Schlatt laughed. "Go around once more, then I'll take you to a cafe that I like."

"You don't want to come with me?"

"I don't think I should be on skates ever again."

(Y/N) didn't try to convince him further. She knew he was probably right. She kissed his cheek and let go of him to skate around the rink once more. Schlatt slowly made his way off the ice and back to where they had left their boots. He almost sighed in relief as his foot slipped free from the confines of the skate.

Why do they make these things so fuckin' tight? he thought to himself. My foot is gonna go numb from lack of blood flow before it goes numb from the cold.

(Y/N) was stood in front of him before he knew it. She was breathing a little heavily, but still had a small smile on her face. Her happiness was so contagious that Schlatt was able to forget everything about this trip that annoyed him.

She changed back into her own boots and they collected their skates to go. Schlatt took her hand and held it tightly so he wouldn't lose her in the crowd. Even though it had cleared off a bit, it was still busy enough that they could easily get separated if they weren't careful.

The cafe Schlatt wanted to go to wasn't too far from Rockefeller. It was a small, not well known spot that he used to go to when he was still in college. There was rarely ever anyone there, which made it the perfect spot to go to get away whenever he needed. He ordered two hot chocolates for them, and they went to sit in a booth near the back of the cafe.

"I appreciate you coming with me today," (Y/N) said. She leaned forward to blow on her drink to cool it off.

"Of course, you wanted me to come," Schlatt said.

(Y/N) lifted her cup to her lips, but winced as the still boiling hot liquid touched her lip. As she placed the cup back down, she said, "Yeah, but I know you hate the city, and I know skating isn't really your thing."

"I mean, I certainly will not be putting these skates to use ever again," he agreed, lightly kicking the skates that were now by his feet. "But I'm not going to say no to something you really want to do."

(Y/N) giggled. "You're whipped."

Schlatt scoffed. "I am not whipped! God forbid I want to do something to make my girlfriend happy."

She smiled and reached across the table for his hand. They were much warmer after holding the hot cup. Schlatt also felt like he had warmed up since coming inside. He almost dreaded having to go back outside.

"We can do whatever you want to do as repayment for today," (Y/N) told him.

He looked at her with confusion. "Repayment?"

She nodded. "I figure you may not have had a great time today, so if you wanted to do something else that you will consider to be a good time, I want to do that to repay you for taking me skating today."

Schlatt was shaking his head before she even finished her thought. "You don't have to repay me for anything. I may not enjoy going into the city, but I'd do it every day if you asked me to. Because I love you, and I love to see you happy. You had a good time today, so I had a good time today."

(Y/N) smiled at him. She squeezed his hand and leaned forward as if he was going to kiss him. Schlatt moved to close the gap, only to be stopped when (Y/N) said, "Whipped."

Schlatt pulled his hand away from her. "Okay, you know what? I take it all back. You can stay here on your own!"

(Y/N) was laughing before taking another sip of her hot chocolate, now cooled down enough that she could actually drink it. Schlatt was shaking his head at her. "You're lucky I love you so much."

"I know," she said, and leaned forward to actually kiss him. "And I love you, too."

[drewizz]

THIRD TIME - 08. blunder

pairing ꕀ rafe cameron x reader

WARNINGS: smut (piv unprotected [wrap it before you tap it], slight thigh riding + cunnilingus) & toxic relationship (platonic?)

WORD COUNT: 5.4K

TAGLIST: open! comment or send in an ask

series masterlist. previous

blunder. (noun) a stupid or careless mistake

Rafe Cameron does not apologize.

He was currently on the brink of insanity, and he blamed it on you. Sleep had been non-existent; his mind wouldn’t shut off, replaying every word and glance you gave him. Yet here he was, at your front door mustering courage to spit out two simple words to you.

“I’m sorry.”

Nevermind that, at least he was here with his hands shoved deep into his pockets, heart pounding so hard it felt like it might crack his ribs. He hated how vulnerable he felt, hated that he was even here. (But for desperate measures, he needed to be here.) 

He raised his hand to knock on the door, hesitated, and then let it fall. What was he even supposed to say?

Hey, I’m sorry for being a complete asshole, but I don’t know how to deal with this. I’m not even sure what the next step is between us. What are we? Do you like me?

Before he could overthink himself into leaving, the door creaked open. Relief mixed with dread until his stomach dropped.

You weren’t the one opening the door.

It was Topper Thornton.

“Top? What the fuck are you doing here?” Rafe blurted before he could stop himself.

Topper looked just as surprised, but his expression quickly morphed into a knowing smirk. “Oh, well speak of the devil. I could ask you the same thing.”

Rafe’s eyes narrowed, his mind racing. He tried to piece together why the hell Topper would be at your house—early in the morning, no less. His stomach churned with suspicion, his temper already flickering to life.

“Where’s Y/N?” Rafe asked, his voice sharper than he intended.

Topper leaned casually against the doorframe, crossing his arms. “She’s inside. Why?”

Rafe’s jaw clenched. He pushed past Topper without waiting for an invitation, his gaze darting around the small entryway.

“Y/N!” he called, his tone clipped.

“What the hell, man?” Topper said, stepping in front of him. “You can’t just barge into her house.”

“So you’re just allowed to be in here?” Rafe snapped as he could feel his anger level again.

“I’m actually a good friend of Y/N,” Topper said, his tone mocking.

The sound of footsteps caught Rafe’s attention, and he turned to see you stepping out of the kitchen, your face a mix of confusion and annoyance.

“Rafe?” you said, voice laced with disbelief. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to talk to you,” he said, his gaze flicking to Topper before settling back on you. “But I guess you’re already busy.”

You frowned, your brows knitting together. “What are you talking about?”

Rafe gestured to Topper, his movements sharp. “Him. Why the fuck is he here?”

“Seriously?” You said, crossing your arms. “He stopped by to drop something off, and now he’s leaving. Why are you even here?”

“I asked why he’s here, didn’t I?” Rafe repeated, his voice rising (and ignoring your question). “You think it’s normal for him to just show up at your house like this?”

“Rafe, you need to calm down,” you said, your tone firm. “I told you, he’s only here to drop something off from a while ago – I haven’t seen him for probably over a year.”

“I’m calm,” he snapped, though his clenched fists and rigid posture said otherwise. “And whatever. I don’t care why he’s here.”

Topper snorted, and Rafe’s head whipped toward him.

“You’ve got some nerve,” Rafe said, stepping closer to Topper. “Just because you came here to drop some shit off doesn’t mean –”

“Doesn’t particularly mean what?” Topper interrupted, his smirk widening. “Unlike you, I actually know how to treat people right, or so I’ve heard.”

Rafe’s vision blurred with anger, his hands flexing at his sides. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.”

“Oh, I think I do,” Topper said, his tone dripping with sarcasm.

“Topper, stop it,” you said while stepping between them.

Rafe’s gaze snapped to you, his expression softening for just a moment before hardening again. “Is this what you do now?” he asked, his voice low and accusatory. “You let him into your house, you hang out with him –

“Are you serious right now?” you interrupted, noting how your voice was rising. “You don’t get to come here and act like this. Especially not after the shit you said last night.”

Rafe’s jaw tightened, his eyes darting between you and Topper. “I don’t trust him,” he said, his tone defensive.

“This isn’t about Topper,” you said with evident frustration. “This is about you and the fact that you can’t seem to figure out what exactly you want.”

“I know what I want,” Rafe said, his voice quieter but no less intense.

“Do you?” you shot back, with eyes narrowing. “Because last night you made it pretty damn clear that you didn’t.”

Topper cleared his throat, his presence suddenly feeling intrusive. “You know what? I’ll leave you two to... whatever this is.”

He gave you a mock salute before brushing past Rafe and out the door.

As the door clicked shut behind him, the tension in the room became almost unbearable.

You turned to Rafe, your expression a mix of anger and hurt. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Me?” Rafe said, his voice rising. “I’m not the one letting him hang around like he owns the place.”

“He’s just someone I know, Rafe,” you said, your voice cracking. “He needed to give me back something from almost a year ago. I don’t even consider him as an entirely good friend of mine, anyway.”

“Well I don’t think you’re fucking him,” Rafe said, though his tone suggested otherwise. “And I’m also not trying to control you or shit like that.”

“Yes, you are,” you said, your frustration boiling over. “You don’t want me, but you don’t want anyone else to have me either. Do you even hear yourself?”

Rafe opened his mouth to respond, but no words came out. His hands flexed at his sides, his frustration palpable.

“You can’t have it both ways, Rafe,” you said in a voice much softer now, though no less pained. “You can’t keep pushing me away and then get mad when I try to move on.”

“I’m not trying to push you away,” Rafe said, his voice coming out much harsher than he wanted it to.

“Then what are you doing?” you asked, your eyes searching his.

“I don’t know,” he admitted, voice softening. “I don’t know how to do this. This thing… between us.”

Your expression softened, but only slightly. “You need to figure it out, Rafe. Because I can’t keep doing this.”

The silence that followed was heavy, filled with unspoken words and lingering tension.

Finally, Rafe took a step back, his gaze dropping to the floor. “Go to the beach with me.”

You looked at him with disbelief written all over your face. “Is that seriously what you’re going to say to me? After all of that?”

“Well I didn’t know that he would be here,” he muttered. “And I was originally going to apologize to you.”

His jaw worked overtime, clenching and unclenching, before he finally groaned and dragged a hand down his face. "Alright," he muttered, not quite meeting your eyes. "I was – whatever. I was out of line earlier, including last night. I was a dick, and you didn’t deserve it. Happy now?"

You raised an eyebrow, leaning casually against the counter with a barely concealed smirk. "That’s your idea of an apology?"

His head snapped up, his glare half-hearted. "What do you want, a parade?"

"A little sincerity wouldn’t kill you," you shot back, crossing your arms as your smirk widened.

Rafe groaned again, the sound low and frustrated. "Fine," he bit out, stepping closer. His voice softened, though the vulnerability seemed to physically pain him. "I shouldn’t have acted like that. Okay? I’m sorry."

You tilted your head, feigning deep thought. "Well that sounded half-assed, no?"

“Fine. I’m incredibly sorry I was acting like a complete asshole to you, and you don’t deserve it.”

“Did you say that to just shut me up or to actually apologize?”

"Both," he said, the corner of his mouth twitching despite himself. “Now go to the beach with me.”

“Fine. But only because I have no plans for the rest of the day.”

“Whatever you say, princess.”

The short ride to the beach was quite peaceful. There weren’t any words exchanged between you two, as Rafe’s eyes were focused on the road and yours settled on the scenery passing outside the window.

“You’re oddly quiet.” 

You rolled your eyes as you wiped your sweaty palms on your legs. (You weren’t even sure why your palms were sweaty in the first place.) “There’s just nothing to talk about.”

In return, all you got was a quiet hum of acknowledgment from him.

As he drove, the tension between you softened into something more tolerable. Rafe tapped the steering wheel, glancing at you occasionally like he wanted to say something but didn’t know how to start. The road stretched ahead of you two, winding toward the coast where the scent of salt and sea promised a reprieve from your usual turmoil.

“And we’re here, princess.”

The sun was still high in the sky when he parked the car near the sand, the salty breeze rolling in as you opened the door. Something about stepping out onto the warm sand with Rafe beside you felt surreal.

“This feels normal,” you said, grabbing your bag from the backseat. “Oddly.”

Rafe raised an eyebrow as he shut his door. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

“Not bad,” you replied, walking next to him. “Just unexpected. First you come and argue with Topper. Then, you’re apologizing and asking me to go to the beach with you. Now here we are.”

“I’m certainly exceptional at surprises.”

His smirk was enough to make you roll your eyes, but you couldn’t stop the small smile tugging at your lips.

You made your way down the sandy path, weaving between families with umbrellas and couples sprawled out on towels. The ocean stretched endlessly before you two, the waves crashing in a rhythm that was both calming and wild.

You dropped your bag near a quieter spot and slipped off your sandals. The sand was warm beneath your feet, the kind of heat that made you want to run straight into the cool water.

“Race you,” Rafe said suddenly, already tugging off his shirt. 

You blinked at him whilst shamelessly staring at his topless form. “What?”

“Come on, Y/N.” He was already taking off toward the water, his laugh carried by the wind.

“Cheater!” you shouted, chasing after him.

By the time you reached the shoreline, he was already waist-deep in the water, grinning like he’d just won a gold medal.

“You’re the worst,” you panted, stepping into the surf.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said, splashing you playfully.

The cold water hit your body, and you gasped. “Rafe!”

“What? Thought you needed to cool off.”

You didn’t hesitate, scooping up water with your hands and throwing it at him. The splash hit his chest, and he feigned a dramatic gasp, clutching his heart.

“Oh, it’s on now,” he said, advancing toward you.

“No, wait–”

But it was too late. He scooped you up in one swift motion, carrying you further into the water.

“Rafe! Put me down!” you shrieked, laughing despite yourself.

“As you wish,” he said, and before you could protest, he dropped you into the waves.

The water enveloped you, cool and refreshing against the heat of the day. You surfaced quickly, sputtering and wiping your face, only to see Rafe doubled over in laughter.

“You’re dead,” you said, lunging at him.

The two of you spent the next several minutes splashing and dunking each other, laughter blending with the sound of the waves. It was chaotic and silly, the kind of unguarded fun you didn’t realize that you needed for a long time.

At some point, both of you stopped, panting and standing waist-deep in the water. Rafe ran a hand through his wet hair, the sun catching on the droplets clinging to his skin.

“You’re surprisingly good at this,” he said, nodding toward you.

“Good at what?”

“Keeping up with me.”

You rolled your eyes, pushing at his shoulder. “Don’t flatter yourself.”

Wading back toward the shore, the sun was drying both of your soaked skins, as you two found your spots on the sand. Rafe pulled a towel from your bag and tossed it at you.

“Thanks,” you said, wrapping it around your shoulders. 

Sitting in silence for a moment, watching the waves crash and retreat, you smiled to yourself. You liked this. The peace. Having comfort by you. Him.

“This is nice,” you said softly.

“Yeah,” he replied, his voice unusually quiet. “But I still wanna know why Top was at your house.”

“Topper’s just someone I know. We have history, not like that but – he’s someone I know. He’s not even considered a close friend of mine.”

“So he was just at your house? When you two aren’t even close friends?”

You felt your own eyes warily turn to Rafe, letting out a sigh. “Rafe, I already told you. He needed to drop something off that I forgot I even had, after an entire year. That’s all.”

“Right. Sorry.”

Another cue of serenity passed between you two.

After a few long minutes, you glanced at him, surprised to find him looking at you. There was something unreadable in his expression, something you couldn’t quite place.

“What?” you asked, suddenly getting self-conscious.

“Nothing.” He looked away quickly, rubbing the back of his neck. “I just never seen you so happy.”

You smiled faintly, staring out at the horizon. “I guess I am.”

For a while, both of you just sat there, the sun beginning its descent and casting a golden glow over the beach. It was peaceful in a way that felt fragile, like it could break at any moment.

“You like ice cream?” Rafe asked suddenly, breaking the silence. “There’s a nice ice cream shop around here we can head to, before head back.”

“Depends on the flavor,” you replied, standing and brushing the sand off your legs. “But an ice cream sounds perfect for right now.”

After the (unfortunately) short moment at the beach – Rafe rolled his truck to a stop in front of the small ice cream shop. He never took girls out for ice cream, much less to hang out with in the public (that was apart from fucking). And here he was today, apologizing to you. Taking you to the beach. Driving you to buy ice cream. So many things he’s never done over the past years, but all done in a single day – just for you.

The faint hum of conversation and laughter spilled out as you both stepped inside the shop, and Y/N couldn’t help but smile at the cozy atmosphere.

Rafe made a beeline for the counter. “Two small salted caramels, please,” he told the cashier without hesitation.

“Hold on,” you interrupted, pulling his arm back. “You don’t get to decide my order. And really, salted caramel?”

He raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms. “Oh, and here I thought we would have the same favorite ice cream flavor in mind, too. If salted caramels that terrible of a flavor, what’re you going to get?”

You stepped closer to the menu (miserably failing to stop the smile creeping onto your face), scanning the options with mock seriousness. “Something simple. Like vanilla.”

“You’re impossible,” Rafe said, shaking his head but grinning nonetheless. 

Finally ordering (after a small bicker), the two of you headed back outside, finding a quiet bench under a streetlamp.

You took a slow lick of your cone, savoring the sweetness, while Rafe leaned back, his legs stretched out and his cone melting slightly in his hand.

“Vanilla? Really?” he teased.

“Some of us appreciate the classics,” you shot back, holding your cone up in mock defense. “And really, salted caramel?”

He gestured toward his cone, feigning offense. “Hey! It’s the perfect combination. Salty and sweet, not to forget how it’s a little unexpected of flavors… like me.”

You rolled your eyes with a grin etching your face. “If by ‘unexpected’ you mean ‘annoying,’ then sure.”

Rafe chuckled, and for a moment, the banter was light and easy, the earlier tension melting like the ice cream in both of your hands.

But then his gaze lingered, catching on a streak of ice cream at the corner of your mouth.

“You’ve got…” He gestured vaguely at your face.

You frowned, swiping at your lip with your hand. “Here?”

“No.” He leaned closer, the amusement fading into something heavier. “Let me.”

Before you could protest, his thumb brushed against your lip, his touch warm and deliberate. The motion was slow, almost agonizing, and you froze, your breath catching.

Then he did it. He brought his thumb to his mouth, licking off the ice cream with a small, deliberate flick of his tongue. “Hm. Tastes sweet.”

Your heart skipped a beat. “That was unnecessary.”

“Was it?” Rafe’s voice was low, and the smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth was downright dangerous.

You tried to form a coherent response, but your mind felt like a jumbled mess of emotions.  Rafe leaned back, clearly pleased with your reaction.

“You’re such a jerk,” you muttered, but your voice lacked any real bite.

“Yeah, but I’m the jerk you agreed to come to the beach with,” he replied, his smirk widening.

You groaned, focusing on your cone and refusing to look at him, afraid of what he might see written all over your face.

Both of you sat there in peace for a while longer, the quiet night wrapping around. 

“You know,” Rafe started off. “I just noticed your parents are never home. You don’t live with them?”

Touchy subject. But you didn’t want to talk about it right now, not while everything was going well. It would ruin the mood. So instead, you just shrugged. “I don’t really talk to them anymore. It’s been awhile, so yeah. I just live alone.”

Rafe glanced over, promptly nodding without asking any further questions.

The stillness stretched over you two, once again, before you sighed. “We should get home now, it’s getting dark. Drive me back home, please?”

“Anything for you.”

The drive back to your house was quiet, the air between both of you charged with a tension that seemed to grow heavier with every passing mile. When Rafe finally pulled into your driveway, you hesitated before getting out, glancing at him.

“Today was really nice,” you said softly.

“Yeah,” he replied, his voice just as quiet. “It was.”

Inside, the house was dimly lit, the faint hum of the refrigerator the only sound as you set your bag down and went to get you two some water. When you turned back, Rafe was standing closer than you expected, his expression unreadable.

“You okay?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

He nodded, but his eyes betrayed him, filled with something you couldn’t quite place.

“You’re staring,” you said, trying to inject some levity into the moment. This was exactly the feeling you felt the last time he was inside your house. In the kitchen. Standing less than 1 foot away from you.

“Maybe I can’t help it,” he replied, his voice low and rough.

Your breath hitched, and for a moment, neither of you moved. Then, as if pulled by some invisible force, your lips met.

The kiss was hesitant at first, a question of which neither of you were sure how to answer. But it deepened quickly, all the emotions you two had been suppressing were now spilling over into the way yours mouths moved against each other.

When both of you finally broke apart, breathless, foreheads resting together.

“You can’t just do that,” you started off. “This is what happened last time… and you know.”

Rafe quirked a teasing eyebrow at you. “What? Is this your way of subtly asking to reenact it?”

You felt your face ablaze, strongly gripping the counter behind you. “No, I wasn’t,” you squeaked as you heard him chuckle. “I was just… telling you.”

“Princess, you can always just ask for it.”

You were not going to be making the same mistake again. But impulse came before forethoughts of your heady actions. You gripped his shirt, pressing your lips against his – hopeful that he would reiterate with the same desire.

And thankfully, he did. His hands were suddenly wandering everywhere on your body. Searching around, finding its spot – one gently (but needily) cradling your head, while the other skimming your waistline.

“Bedroom,” you hoarsely muttered against his lips. “Not here.”

Lips reuniting with a desperate hunger, a collision of breath and need that sent a shiver through both of you. His hands were roaming more instinctively – grasping, pulling, holding – as you two stumbled back, movements uncoordinated but full of urgency.

Rafe tangled his fingers in your hair, tilting your head back to deepen the kiss, mouths moving in perfect chaos. You gasped against him, your hands curling into the fabric of his shirt, tugging him closer as you bumped into the corner of the hallway. A half-laugh, half-groan escaped as he steadied you, his grip firm at your waist.

You didn’t bother turning on the lights; the faint glow from the horizon outside was streaming through the windows, enough to guide you two.

The kisses were relentless, punctuated by whispers of names and breathless laughter. His hands slyly sliding under your shirt, warm against your skin, as you were pressed against the bedroom door. You fumbled with the handle, breaking the kiss just long enough to look up at him, your eyes glazed and lips swollen.

“Here,” you whispered, barely audible, but he didn’t need words. His answer was the way his lips returned to yours, softening for a moment before pulling you inside. As if he was waiting for this very moment, lost in action. 

Every step was a tangle of limbs and stolen touches, the urgency was pacing and being matched. Crashing onto the bed, everything was becoming hazy. The desire was just about everywhere, scouring through your body.

You could feel how strategically slow he was moving against your body. His lips glided across your lips, down to your chest (which was still frustratingly clothed).

Everything was too slow for your liking. It was becoming too agonizingly slow. You were splayed on the bed, between his knees and his hands were still actively roaming around everywhere. Soft kisses planted on every inch of your skin that was bare. 

Both of your clothes were coming off, one by one, with an exchange of a soft kiss on your skin. His hands were just about everywhere, on the heat of your thighs, to your soft abdomen. The cool air hit your breasts which were pleasantly pert, and nipples unthinkably hard.

Soft moans were spilling out of you, with a trail of heavy breathing, as his tongue was swirling on the junctions of your skin, next to your sopping heat.

“Rafe,” you weren’t even thinking straight. “Stop teasing, you’re gonna kill me here.”

All you got in response was a soft chuckle and a teasing kiss to your clit. He was softly licking at your cunt, and you were only dripping in response. Your sweetness dripped on his tongue, down his throat – now he was impossibly stiff.

Quickly climbing onto the bed, as his back hit the headboard of the bed, sitting up up-right on his thigh. He sat you up right on his thigh, enclosing his hand full of your hair, bringing his lips down to your ear. “Princess, you’re soaked.”

You felt your face turn more red (if that was even possible), starting to slowly grind against his thigh. Your arousal was slowly spreading, as your clit was deliciously colliding with muscle-taut thighs. “Feels too good,” you whined.

Rafe was in absolute euphoria as he felt what was happening right now. You were here, on top of him on your bed, getting off from his own thigh – whining and moaning in his ear. He felt your fingers trace his arms up to his pecs, leading to goosebumps to arise, making him shiver and shut his eyes.

He felt your cunt moving from his thigh to his hard cock, as your hips were hugging him. He could imagine behind his closed eyes, a glistening trail of your arousal dripping all over him – and this made him harder. Painfully.

Next thing he felt was your warm cunt enveloping his cock, as you sank down on him. Eyes rolling back into his head, his teeth were gritting against each other. “Oh my fuck,” he managed to get out, he’s not sure of what he’s saying, anyways. “I didn’t put on a condom.”

He’s in complete bliss, trying not to thrust up harder, as he hears you mewl in his ear. 

“It’s okay, ‘m on the pill.” 

You were so fucking tight and warm, clamping down on his cock like how he clamped his sweaty fingers deep in your hips – mentally apologizing if it left a small bruise the next morning. 

The way you rolled your hips in such a fluid motion was keeping him insane. A rhythm that was built, drawing him too close to the edge that he’s even thinking about shoving you away. He can hold himself, just a bit more.

Next thing is that he feels you shudder, both your pelvis and your breath, against him. He can feel your fingers digging into the expanse of his shoulders, as you’re writhing in a flowing motion. You’re coming undone against him, on him, with him inside of you.

“Oh my God. Rafe.”

Hearing his name sweetly cry out of your mouth, with your succulent voice while your sweaty body collides with his, only causes him to roll you over onto your back. He wants more, and he can sense that you also want more.

“Can I…?” he muttered against your lips. He’s seeking your approval, that this is okay. Everything’s okay. It’s not just him. It’s both of you. You both want it. To fuck. Or was it love? 

Or maybe, each other?

Nevermind that, he’s inwardly grinning as he sees you manage to spread your legs even wider, whining out a response, knowing that this is surely mutual. Right?

“Please,” you manage to whine out. “Yes.”

He notes your confirmation as he holds you down, hands gripping your thighs. Both of your bodies meet together like a puzzle piece, like the two of you have always done this with such… love.

He grazes your slick-covered heat with his cock, sliding into you with such ease. The pleasure that’s thrumming beneath his hips is driving him mad, eyes rolling back due to the immense surge that went straight to his body.

Moving at an incredulously slow pace, he can feel your finger grasping at him – a sign to go faster. And so he does. Picking up his pace, his thrusts are going at a faster tempo, he leans closer to your face to give you a kiss. He murmurs sweet nothings into your ear, he’s not even sure of what he’s promising you at this rate.

All he feels is your hips attempting to meet his hips at the delicious pace, cunt clenching as his fingers reach down to your attention-seeking clit. He feels you tug at his hair, at his back – your hands are everywhere. He loves it.

He’s not sure of what you’re saying, but he hears your high-pitched whines and mewls, as your hips are erratically twitching and your soaked cunt clenching him tightly. Pulling out, he lets go on your stomach, feeling a groan rip through his throat. Everything is hazy.

A long moment of silence is passed through between the two of you, only deep breathing and pants to be heard. He hears you ask him to help carry you to the bathroom, and so he does.

He cleans up in the guest bathroom, and after a few long minutes you two reunite again in the bedroom the two of you just fucked in.

“Lay down with me,” you muster out, grabbing his arm and tugging him down on the floor. “The bed’s all sweaty now, just lay down on the ground with me.”

So he does, and he likes it. He’s not really sure what to do next. He’s never done this before. He usually fucks and leaves. He’s not used to staying after a session of fucking. Then he hears your sweet, timid voice which catches him off-guard. A question he’s been dreading to be asked.

“So, what does this make us? What even are we?”

“Uh,” Rafe clears his throat. “Friends.”

You sit upright, staring down at him. “Friends?”

He doesn’t like this. He’s not sure why you’re furrowing your brows at him, in a questioning tone. They’re friends now, right? So all he musters out is a blunt response. “Yeah?”

You stare at him warily and confused. You were sure that the reason he took you to the beach and got ice cream, him pulling you in for a kiss – it was more than just saying the word ‘friends’. It was like the night, all over again. “You’re joking, right?”

He looks away, sighing. “I already told you I don’t do relationships, Y/N.” He can’t tell you that he’s never been in a relationship before, he thinks it’ll ruin his image for you. A boy who’s never been in a relationship before.

You feel as if he just stabbed you, once again. “So this whole time,” you started off carefully, trying to get only the facts straight. “You fucked me as a friend?”

“Yeah.”

To be honest, he wasn’t sure what he felt of you. Were you a friend? More than a friend? No, he couldn’t think you were more than a friend. He felt that dating was a meticulous chore.

“Get out.”

He hears your voice, but it sounds pained. Why? Did you seriously want to be more than friends? He told you plenty of times that he didn't do relationships, why was this being turned onto him?

“What?”

You’re sniffling, and you’re not sure if you should necessarily be crying over him (again). “I said get out of my house.”

“I already told you I can’t, and don’t, do relationships.” He’s not sure why he says that in a questioning manner. It’s how he feels, right?

“Rafe, will you just get out?”

He stands up, and suddenly he feels angry. He’s not sure why, but he feels mad. Livid, even. He told you multiple times that he’s not a relationship type guy, and now it’s his fault? The next few words he spits at you is from complete impulse. “You can’t fucking make it seem like it’s just my fault when you were also the one rubbing yourself all over me. I even told you I don’t do relationships.” He snaps his mouth closed as he sees your pained face, washed by vulnerability.

“Get out.” Your voice betrays you, slipping out the tremble.

“Fine.”

He doesn’t want to leave. He wants to apologize. He wants to hold you tight to his body and apologize, with genuinity. Telling you he’s never done this. He can be better for you. But he can’t hurt his pride. He walks to the front door and turns back to ask you (with some kind of audacity). “Can I have your number, at least?”

You shove him out the door, and before slamming it shut on his face, you mutter with such vile. “You won’t need it since this is the last time we’ll see each other.”

He blankly stares at your front door that’s been slammed at his face. He feels sorry, but he’s not sure how to express it. Is he sorry? He’s not sure. But he feels guilt, in some way. 

This wasn’t how things were supposed to go. Well, not as he originally planned. He wanted to build a truce between you and him. Not a complete shut out. He sighs, angrily running his hand through his hair. He walks to his truck and he’s confused. Did he like you? Or did he just enjoy the utmost interesting attention you gave him?

He decides on the latter, and he drives off. Something is oddly nagging at his heart, but he (attempted to) brush it off instead.

That marked the first checkpoint between Rafe and Y/N. Strangers to enemies, with an inclusion of two fucks and an unsolicited "date." In other terms, the first “try” between the two of them, after two weeks of their first encounter at a party, with unsupervised whiskey.

NOTES. hey... it's been awhile 😅 (but yay! we finally ended the first part) we're going to get that topper and yn's parents backstory in the second part.. (the upcoming few chapters 🤫) meanwhile.. thank you for all those asks and love you've been all sending :') truly love all of you

TAGS. check settings if you aren't properly tagged. @urbrunettebombshell @rafesfavouritegirl @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account @percysley @wtfdudesblog @fratbrochrisgf @rrosiitas @powpowjinxlife @ltristessedureratoujours @ditzyzombiesblog @honeyluvsatj

[eunoia-writes]

The other side of the door • ArthurTV

Summary - After a fight and a misunderstanding, Arthur’s heartfelt gesture forces Y/N to confront her feelings, leading to a pivotal moment in their relationship.

"I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was a big deal. I told him I didn’t feel the same," Y/N said, her voice low and careful. She and Arthur were standing in the middle of Isaac’s birthday party, trying to avoid making a scene.

"Not a big deal?" Arthur’s voice rose, barely contained. "A guy confesses his love for you—my girlfriend—and it’s not a big deal?"

His words only made Y/N more frustrated. She clenched her jaw, trying to stay calm. She didn’t want this argument, especially not here. "Arthur, I’m sorry. I should’ve told you," she said softly, but it didn’t stop him.

Arthur continued, his voice louder now. "It’s a big deal, Y/N. How could you not think this was important enough to tell me?"

Y/N’s patience snapped. "What is it, Arthur? You think I’m keeping my options open?" she shot back, her voice sharp. And he said nothing.

"Fuck you!" she spat, storming out of the house. Arthur called after her, his tone suddenly desperate, pleading for her to stay. But she didn’t turn back. By the time he realized he had gone too far, she was already gone.

That night, Y/N ignored the endless stream of texts and calls from Arthur. Apologies filled her screen, his words tumbling over themselves. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have yelled. The texts kept coming until they suddenly stopped.

The silence might have worried her if she wasn’t still so furious. The next morning, she woke up to a single message.

Not from Arthur. From Nicole, his ex.

A photo. Arthur and Nicole in bed together.

Y/N stared at the image, her chest tightening. Hurt. Rage. Betrayal. She didn’t know which emotion to lean into, but she knew one thing: she needed answers.

Her roommate drove her to Arthur’s place under the impression Y/N was just collecting her things. She had no idea Y/N was about to unleash hell.

"Arthur!" Y/N stormed into his flat, her voice echoing through the space. Isaac appeared in the doorway, raising an eyebrow.

"Chill with the yelling. Prince Charming’s on the couch, regretting every drop of tequila," he said nonchalantly. Y/N didn’t respond. She headed straight for the living room.

Arthur sat slumped on the couch, his head in his hands. He looked up, bleary-eyed, as Y/N marched in. "Y/N, I’m sorry about last night—"

"I don’t care about that!" she cut him off, shoving her phone in his face. "What the fuck is this?"

Arthur’s face turned pale, his mouth opening slightly before he finally managed to speak. "That’s not what it looks like," he said, standing up.

Y/N took a step back, shaking her head. "So, one argument, and you run back to her?" Her voice cracked despite her best efforts to stay composed. Tears welled in her eyes. "Was this what you wanted all along?"

"No, Y/N. Please, listen to me," Arthur pleaded, stepping closer. "Nothing happened. I drank too much, passed out in the spare room. I didn’t even know she was there until I woke up."

"I don’t believe you," Y/N whispered, her voice trembling. She turned on her heel, tears streaming down her face. "Isaac, will you drive me home?"

Isaac hesitated, glancing at Arthur, whose silent plea was clear. Still, Isaac nodded. "I’ll take her."

Arthur stepped forward. "No, I’ll drive her."

Y/N didn’t have the energy to argue. She climbed into the passenger seat, staring out the window in silence as Arthur tried, and failed, to explain himself. When they pulled up to her house, the weight of everything hit her all at once. She burst into tears.

"Y/N," Arthur said softly, reaching out to her.

"Just leave," she choked out. Her voice was firm, even through her sobs.

Arthur got out of the car, walked around to her side, and opened the door. Instead of walking away, Y/N fell into his arms, crying harder than she had in years. Arthur held her tightly, lifting her off the ground and carrying her up the stairs to her door.

For a moment, they stood there in silence. Then Y/N finally whispered, "Leave."

Arthur’s heart broke, but he nodded. "Okay," he said quietly. He wiped his own tears and walked away, giving her the space she needed.

Hours later, Y/N was lying in bed, her pillow soaked with tears, when a soft tapping sound broke through her haze. She ignored it at first, but when it continued, she dragged herself to the window.

There he was. Arthur. Standing in the pouring rain, holding her favorite flowers in one hand and a pebble in the other.

"What are you doing?" she called out, her voice thick with emotion.

Arthur didn’t hesitate. "I’m in love with you, Y/N!" he shouted over the rain. "And nothing—nothing—is going to change that. I didn’t do anything with Nicole. I swear. I’d never hurt you like that."

Y/N’s resolve wavered. She shook her head, tears threatening to spill again. "There’s nothing you can say to make this right, Arthur," she said, but they both knew she didn’t mean it.

Arthur’s voice softened. "If you really mean that, come down here and tell me to leave. Say it to my face, and I’ll go. I promise."

Her heart pounded as she stepped back from the window. She slipped on her shoes and walked outside, the rain soaking through her clothes in seconds. Arthur stood there, drenched, his eyes locked on her.

"Tell me to go," he said, his voice trembling. "And I will."

Y/N stared at him, her lips trembling. "Arthur..." she began, but the words she meant to say wouldn’t come out. Instead, she surged forward, capturing his lips in a desperate, rain-soaked kiss.

Arthur wrapped his arms around her, pulling her as close as he could. "I love you," she whispered against his lips.

"I love you, too," he murmured, holding her tighter, knowing she was his again.

[talesfromawannabejournalist]

@things-arent-what-they-seem66

Every doctor appointment, every development of the baby, everything Lucifer was there for. When he felt the baby kick for the first time Lucifer had thought his heart had melted. He wasn’t there for the first time, but damn will he ever miss this one. Adam was more than enjoying all the attention from his mate. Eve had done her utmost best to at least ensure his comfort throughout each pregnancy.

For that he will always be thankful. However, she wasn’t Lucifer.

Adam awoke from his slumber as Hells reddish rays of light streaming down his face. He smiled feeling well rested. He brought a hand that was lying at his side up to rub the sleep out of his eye. Unexpectedly, but predictably, it ran against his large six month bump. He left out a small laugh and rubbed it. Adam: Good morning, I almost forgot about you

Once the omega had fully woken up, which took a good few minutes, he was up and about going through his morning ritual. He cleaned his face and teeth, then took a good, long warm bubble bath. It always helped him release the tense muscles that overnight brought. As he washed himself he couldn’t help but play with his long, thick brown locks. Now don’t get Adam wrong he loved his hair it was just a little too long for him.

In Heaven he wasn’t allowed to really cut it. The elders told him that it was natural for all omegas to have a face of femininity. As the first omega and mother of humanity he had to set an example. That meant that he must follow their expectations of him to a tee. His hair was only one of those things.

He wasn’t allowed to dress in his preferred style. Nor was he to have any facial hair. Then of course there were his manners, ‘omegas were to be seen, not heard’ ‘Speak only when spoken to’. He was told that after all he was the one to have initiated discord and sin being brought upon the mortals. Since the rest of omega kind came from him they all were the same. Never mind the fact that alphas also came from him.

The more he kept thinking about it, the more Adam was glad to have left that place.

Once Adam was fully cleaned from head to toe. He got out of his bath, donned a fresh robe, and made his way to the closet. He searched and searched for any pants that might fit him. However, all his maternity pants have seemed to outgrow him. He was just going through a few shirts when he felt someone hug him from behind, resting their hands on his belly. Lucifer: Good morning my beauty.

Adam: Morning.

Lucifer: What’s the matter? Can’t find anything good to pick?

Adam: More like I can’t find anything at all. None of my clothes fit me.

Lucifer: Hmm, if you don’t mind I think I know something that will work.

Lucifer snapped his fingers and Adam’s soft fuzzy robe and slippers disappeared. Only to be replaced by a maternity dress that went just past his knees. It was white and covered in skulls, wrapped against the side of his belly was a black bow. It almost made it look like a present. Adam was already impressed but when he took a glance down to his feet he almost gasped.

It was the boots he saw in that store window a couple days ago while baby shopping with Lucifer. The very best part? They were low heel and felt incredible for his already swollen ankles.

Adam: Oh baby I love it!

Lucifer: Knew you would sweetie. Anyway better finish up. I have a surprise for you.

Adam raised an eyebrow but did as he was told. Once done and ready he went outside where Lucifer was waiting for him. He grinned and pulled out a blindfold.

Lucifer: You don’t mind do you? I just don’t want you peeking and having the surprise ruined.

Adam shook his head and lowered it so that Lucifer could tie the blindfold around his eyes. Once he made sure that Adam couldn’t see. He carefully guided him down the stairs, down the hallways, until finally they made it outside to the garden. He could’ve just portal him to their destination but wanted to build up the excitement and interest. Adam was confused when he heard murmurs all around him.

Even more confused when he heard a “Get down!” Followed by a loud slap and a yelp. Adam: Uh Luci?

Lucifer: Hold on aaaaaand now!

Adam took the blindfold off and immediately gasped. Hands flying to his mouth in shock at the sight of all the baby decorations, snack tables, and most notably a mountain of presents on one stand. There were a group of demons, a few Adam recognized and some he didn’t. They were very big was all that he would say.

There was even a banner above that said congratulations. Adam turned to his mate who had a big smile on his face.

Lucifer: Happy baby shower love!

The First Anti-Christ

@things-arent-what-they-seem66

(excuse me for the long prologue)

Anti Christ, the child of the fallen one, the devil. Everyone knows of the name and what it means. However, they don’t know of WHO that child is do they? Everyone thinks that the child will make themselves known as they bring on the end of humanity. What people don’t realize is that the anti-Christ has already walked upon the Earth.

In fact he was the first to be born on the planet. You see he was one of the very first humans. The very first child and son of the mother of humanity, Adam the first omega. His name was Cain.

Now many must be wondering on how this came to be. Why did it happen. How and why did the first omega manage to give birth to the fallen one’s offspring. All will be explained here, in this story.

A long, long, long, time ago when the Earth was still young the creator of it had decided on what its final inhabitants would be. They were called humans, the very first of their kind. He made them into something special. With their names came their designations.

Lilith the first woman and alpha

Adam the first man and omega

He made the two to be companions, to watch over another as one would for a friend or as he hoped like siblings. However, his other creations had other plans. While the Lord was busy attending to his purpose of watching over the universe. The other creations, the angels went down to the humans and they told the two that they were more than just companions. They told them that they were mates and they would bring forth true humanity.

Both were confused and asked how? The angels told them that once a month Adam’s womb would welcome Lilith’s seed and instructed him for when the time came for Adam to lay on his back and to spread his legs for his mate. When they heard of this both were rather disgusted by it. They hadn’t known each other for long but they simply weren’t compatible in that way. They couldn’t even bother to be friends for they both had too many differences that often clashed with each other.

While Adam was energetic and outgoing, Lilith was reserved and careful. It would often cause arguments from the two, especially when it came to their duties. Their first duties, of naming and caring for everything in the garden. Lilith thought Adam to be immature. Adam thought Lilith to be demanding. Both seemed to think that nothing was ever good enough for each person. One thing they both could agree on is that they did not wish to be mates.

Still Adam did not wish to upset the angels and simply bowed his head and nodded submissively. They began to explain other sets of rules that both were to follow. Lilith as the alpha was to always provide and care for her omega. Adam as the omega was to always follow her way and submit to his alpha. Both were to bring children into this world.

Lilith would become the father of humanity. While Adam would become the mother of humanity.

Lilith, disgusted at the thought, disagreed wholeheartedly. She fled from the garden and away from the omega. Hoping to never set another foot in there again. She was found by someone, an angel of the Lord himself, whom she would soon call a friend and sometime after that a husband. Though she didn’t trust him at first she eventually told the angel of why she ran from paradise.

The angel was shocked and confused. Why would his siblings do that? Why would they mess with his Father’s creations that way? He wanted so badly to go up there and tell his Father of what they had done to Lilith. He knew that they would somehow find a way to pin the blame onto him.

That is why he came up with a new plan. To meet and talk to Lilith’s supposed mate. What he didn’t know at the time was that the omega was actually his true mate.

He crept into the garden, careful not to aware the elders of his presence. What awaited him in the garden was not what he expected. A true beauty, one that took his breath away. Though he had thought Lilith to be pretty. She was nothing compared to Adam.

His soft brown hair, honeyed eyes that sparkled, and tan skin that was splattered by freckles. His Lucious curves was enough to drive him insane. The angel managed to open his mouth and introduced himself. His name was Lucifer, the angel of light and God’s most favored son.

[magiciian]

Talk tickling with me pt 2!

First talk tickling with me here ^.^

Magiciianler appears a bit here

times I got to use my lovely nails

First time:

On the second day with @dusktexanler, I was lying down in bed, and he was trying to tickle my feet. This is when I remembered “hey someone told me some top tickle tricks I could use on him” While I was break dancing on the bed trying to get away from Dusk getting my feet ; An opening occurred ! His side was right in my line of sight👀 I kept looking at his side ,then his eyes and hands ( to make sure they were still focused on getting my feet) . When the field was cleared I LAUNCHED my hand to his side for about ten seconds 😵‍💫🤣 He immediately noticed and started wresting my arms to get it away from his side- stating” Oh I see how it is - I see how it is now. You wanna play this game ? Alright, we can play”

I IMMEDIATELY CONFESSED who told me ( they know who they are🤣). I kept saying, “I just wanted to try, get you back, and I’m sorry.” All while I was babbling, he decided to tickle my neck and ears 🥲

I started apologizing mixed with my laughing like there was no tomorrow - trying to push his hands away 😅 and he responded “Oh, are you now? Well- I think you deserve it”

Second time:

@bb-nesquik in the mix

Laying in bed ( I think this was after I was hogtied tickled -will talk about later).

I was in the middle between the two, Dusk on my left and Ness on my right. Turned into Ness lying diagonally with her feet at the end of the bed. Dusk tickling her upper-body while I started trailing my talons down her legs , to the ankle and softly cupping her feet into my hands. Letting my nails introduce themselves to her toes and soles. I’d say the introduction went great ^.< because they kept meeting up with each other throughout the night 🤗

Moving my fingers up and down motions like a conductor of a symphony. Watching her toes scrunch up and down, and her soles shake. At that moment, I thought, “Oooh, this is how foot fetishes can begin. “

Third time:

Ness started tickling Dusk, and I decided to help by pinning his arms down. Which I was very good at for a while until he began to fight back - then I would try to use my legs and arm to pin his arms down🤣

By the end, I was screaming for Ness to help me get his arms back down, but it was too late, and he got his fingers by my neck and ears 😫

Fourth time

Ness in the over the door restraints

While Dusk was getting her good over there, I watched from the sidelines( for a while). Feeling her gaze stay on me 🫣🤭 I was cautious about trying to tickle her.

Most times, when her eyes weren’t closed from laughing, looking at dusk, they’d be tracking me😶‍���️

When Dusk was getting her upper body, and I didn’t feel eyes on me anymore, I squatted down to get her legs 🫡

Mission successful !

Fifth time:

Ness bound to the bed wearing the finger stretchers on her soles.

Before he even started tickling her , her eyes were on ME🤣

Ness to Dusk : “Where is she ?”’

Me : “I’m not the one tickling you!”

Ness: “Yes, but I can get him back later - I only have today with you”.

Same thing - I was watching from the distance for a while.

Cheering on the sidelines

Laying down and scrolling through tumblr , saying

“Yeah get her Dusk!”

“mmmhmmm that’s what you get”

“Oooo use that too!”

“I don’t feel bad because you did the same to me”

Dusk was continuing , I offered my assistance 😌

Dusk : “I don’t think you should help for your own safety”😆🤣 ( l didn’t listen)

When he went to her upper body, I snuck behind his body and quickly walked across the bottoms of the bed, dancing my nails on her feet.

Sixth :

Ness vs Magiciian Tickle wrestling

After Dusk was done tickling her and letting her out of the bondage, I started backing up onto my ship ( my bed) and covering myself with pillows. Ness climbs onto the bed, on top of me, with the pillow lying between our chests. She gets her left hand under the pillow and tickles my side 🙃. Dusk decided to come by to take away some of my pillow protection !! Leaving more of my spots unexposed 😫 then taking a seat.

Watching Ness and I going at it with each other. After she got to my side by going under the pillow, I got my hand to her side and used that opportunity to sit up. Once I got up, I grabbed both of her hands, and we were face to face … when she decided to use her toes to tickle my sides 😟 I decided to lose one hand and tickle that hat foot, then her stomach ! Down she went on her back and down came my hands to her belly. I THOUGHT I HAD HER until she noticed my foot was hanging off the bed and decided to hang it off to tickle it 🤯.

Ngl, at this point, I was scared she might fall, so I tried pulling her up by her thighs, but she insisted on getting that foot since I was still getting hers🫠. Once she was pulled up again on to the bed this time laid out where her stomach was in my street. So I got to town to dragging and wiggliqng them around on there and her neck / ears 🤩

Watching her lay there and giggle happily was a treat 🥰

Next thing I know my arms were pinned above my head by her ,

Dusk asking “Do you need any help?”

I respond “No, she doesn’t need any help”

Ness says “I may need some help” so he walks over asking “Where do you want me?” Ness responding “Actually you choose the spot you wanna go for”

Guess where he goes ?!?

MY EARS AND NECK OMGOSH

Will they ever get a break?

Dusk : “Are you sorry ?”

Me: “Yes, I’m sorry to admit I’m the winner of this match” 😆

*tickling continues*

Seventh:

After that tickle match Ness and Dusk went back to their ship ( bed) and I was exhausted on mine 😵‍💫🤣

Once again, resting until I hear giggling! I peek up and see Ness is tickling Dusk! Once again, I’m back on my cheerleading duties 😛

“Get him Ness!”

“Use the tools he used on you”

“Wwooooww you can’t take what you dish out”

While tickling his feet, I kept sending eye signals to the Pursonic since it was charging next to where she was tickling his feet. I even kept whispering, “Get the Pursonic ! The Pursonic,” and finally, I decided to grab it and use it on his feet 🤩 while Ness held them down!

Ness telling Dusk

“I had to give her that one after all the tickling she’a gone through “

Hooowww sweet 🥰🥹

I felt ACCOMPLISHED

[jellyjuicer]

Jinx x Ekko (College AU!)

Compromise

(Ch 3.)

Chapter 3.

Vi was finishing up her shift in the kitchen when she caught a glimpse of Ekko out of the corner of her eye. “Hey!! wait up…”

Ekko slowed down and took out one earbud. “Woah, Vi, long time no see..”

“Are you serious? I served you breakfast yesterday.. ungrateful son of a b*tch..”

Ekko chuckled and let out a sigh. “It was a joke, Vi, ever heard of one?”

She rolled her eyes and took him to the side. “I needa talk to you, boy saviour.” She looked up, “It’s about Jinx.”

Ekko’s eyes went wide, “Is she okay? What happened? Will she be okay?? Is she fine? Tell me Vi!!”

“Hey hey, I know you like her but would you mind calming down. Geez, don’t get your panties in a twist.”

Ekko looked taken aback as he sputtered, “Hey! I don’t wear panties… so don’t go saying that.”

"I've seen the way you look at her, the way you help her out all the time, you're always there for her Ekko."

Ekko shrugged, trying to play it cool. "I just like helping her out, that's all."

•*•*•*•*~~*•*•*•*•

Vi raised an eyebrow. "Don't give me that, Ekko. I've seen the way you've helped her with psychology class, making her feel more confident. And all those games you've shown her to help her learn? That's not just friendship, Ekko."

Ekko looked down, fidgeting with his hands. "I only want to…see her happy, Vi."

Vi put a hand on his arm. "I know you do, Ekko. And I think you could make her really happy if you just told her how you feel. You've done so much for her already, it's clear you care about her deeply."

Ekko sighed as he held his nose bridge, looking up at Vi. "I don't know, Vi. What if she doesn't feel the same way? What if it ruins our friendship?"

Vi smiled. "Ekko, you'll never know if you don't try. And even if it doesn't work out, I think Jinx values your friendship too much to let it ruin things between you two. Besides, I've seen the way she looks at you sometimes... I think she might feel the same way."

Ekko's eyes widened, hope sparking in his eyes, "Really? You think so?"

Vi nodded. "Yeah, I do. So what do you say, Ekko? Are you going to take a chance and tell Jinx how you feel?"

Ekko took a deep breath, a determined look on his face. "Yeah, Vi…I’ll think about it."

He waved goodbye and rode away on his skateboard.

Maybe I shouldn’t…. What if it distracts her from the exam tomorrow…

I don’t know…. Maybe I should just let it go

With that his phone buzzed:

Ekko sighed and murmured under his breath, “Guess I’d better put on something nice..”

A/N: Do we think Ekko should confess to her next chapter??? Orrrr do I drag it on another few

[mamawasatesttube]

how do you deal with liking kon when like especially early on he can be really weird to women? like i’m reading some of the supergirl comics from a list and he keeps talking about her chest and it’s icking me out

well, step one i would say would be to generally not take too many characterization notes for any character from their appearances in crossovers as opposed to their solo runs, if applicable. (and if you're reading supergirl vol 5, "talking about her chest" is unfortunately a feature of jeph loeb's writing. he has everyone do it, from power girl to lex luthor.)

but wrt kon: i tend to keep in mind that the cultural context of the 90s, unfortunately, included a lot of writers who simply did not grasp that flirtation and harassment are not actually the same thing. when you look at the way most of the women kon interacts with are written to respond to him, it's clear that he's supposed to be a flirt. like a stupid flirty fifteen year old boy. he's not written as threatening and he's not generally doing any physical action. he's just saying shit.

unfortunately, many of the adult men writing him (especially, like, jeph loeb) do not know how to write a boy flirting with a girl without making him come off like a massive fucking creep. this is especially true in comics where he makes side appearances rather than his actual solo, bc in his actual solo you'll see him continue to make stupid horny 15yo boy jokes but overall he's also trying really hard to be a good boyfriend to tana and whatnot. however, in crossovers, writers probably were just told "haha horny teenage boy" and went "oh well here's what i'd say if i was a horny teenage boy" and it can def be uncomfortable to read. certain writers (cough cough jeph loeb, and also sam loeb, honestly what is with all these loebs) are worse about this than others, but it definitely can get grating, so i get that. but it's def worse in crossovers than in his actual main book. like, Significantly Worse. so i tend to attribute that to bitch-ass creep writers simply not comprehending that you can be flirty without being a fucking creep.

it would be different if, like, the girls/women around him were written to react with horror/disgust/discomfort, but in the majority of cases i would say they just kind of laugh it off? which is def again like. male writers being stupid, on the one hand, but on the other it is telling to me that the intent is for him to come off as a nonthreatening, flirty/horny teenager. like rocket actively makes fun of him for flirting with her while she's pregnant, in worlds collide. and, again, a lot of these things were written 30 years ago, so they def can read as pretty dated, and i get that; i would just say that my personal interpretation of him is pretty heavily colored by his solo, and much less so by crossovers by writers who seemed to use him as free reign to be misogynistic creeps. which i do hate reading, too, so i do sympathize - i just think it kinda comes down to how men writing "flirtation" in the 90s comes off when reading today + authorial intent vs actuality of what is written.

[wooahaeruby]

Chapter 39: Heavy Clouds

Chapter Word Count: 5,247

TW

(Spoilers but PLEASE) Decently graphic descriptions of TORTURE (not limited to: knives involved, electrocution, strangling, claustrophobia) Bringing up Mouse's trauma. Chapter…12 is brought up, I'm sorry Mingyu Mouse fights back a little

Author's Note:

I am....sorry not sorry for this. Nothing bad ever happens in BSH. I'm going to hide now :D Thanks to @pinkskiddo for being my beta reader and hating me every step of the way!

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Pacing, that was what Jeonghan has been going for the last three. Fucking. Hours. 

He started in the office upstairs after the meeting with the group, aimlessly walking around past whoever was left. A majority of their allies had gone out to search while he and Seokmin were ordered to stay behind. Quickly he got bored of the same four walls and made his way downstairs, walking around the outer wall of the warehouse floor. His nail beds were picked and bitten from his anxiety, every single worse case scenario running through his head in his worry. 

I need to get out of here. He told himself, moving to nip and pull at the skin of his lips. 

It was probably easy to slip out unnoticed from the warehouse. The one major thing he had to worry about was running into any of SVT, specifically Seungcheol. Standing near the foot of the stairs, face twisted in thought, Jeonghan had two ideas running in his head. 

One, as he thought earlier, he could walk out the doors and one could stop him. Definitely one of the perks of being a boss within SVT. 

Two, he gets someone upstairs to go with him. Siyeon was still up there with Wonwoo and Yeosang, hoping to find a glimpse of Mouse anywhere within the city. Sona…Yeah he didn’t know where she was. Once she showed up and got orders, he hadn’t seen her. There was also the fact that Seokmin was sulking upstairs, quietly boiling in guilt and anger. 

Scanning the nearly empty warehouse floor, Jeonghan made up his mind and hurried up the stairs. He popped his head into the office and called for Seokmin to talk in private for a moment. The other looked confused yet still left the office. 

Closing the door firmly behind Seokmin, Jeonghan grabbed his arm and dragged him down the stairs. “Hurry up, we need to get to the store room.” 

“What-”

“Do you want to go find Mouse or not?” Glaring over his shoulder to Seokmin, he released the other’s arm while he nodded. “Then grab a gun and let's get out of here before anyone realizes we are gone. Leave your phone here so no one can track us. 

Making their way into the store room, Jeonghan tossed his phone on a random table and went for the gun wall. He grabbed a double holster that went over his shoulder, securing it tightly then loaded two light weight handguns into their slots. Seokmin did similarly, grabbing three extra gun magazines of bullets and handing some over to Jeonghan.

“We can head out the back and grab your car.” Jeonghan adjusted his jacket, one that was actually left at the warehouse, long with thick material to stay warm, making sure his weapons were hidden. 

Placing his phone on the table, Seokmin nodded, grabbing a knife and a flashlight as well. “Okay, let’s go.” 

Peeking out of the room, Jeonghan made his way to the back door with Seokmin. He still couldn’t find Sona as he walked quickly but no one upstairs could see them from the area they walked. He sighed a shallow breath when they made it out without anyone spotting them. He didn’t know why he was so worried though. He was a leader of the group, but…Seungcheol’s words were more law in actuality. Everyone still answered to him. 

They successfully got within a few hundred feet of Seokmin’s car, eager to get on the road, but Sona came into view, stepping out from behind the vehicle. Her arms were crossed over her chest and she stepped forward, leaning herself against the driver’s side door. 

“Mind telling me where you’re going?” She tilted her head, drumming her fingers on her arms. 

“Out,” Was all Jeonghan answered, sliding his hands into his pockets. “If you will excuse us, Sona, we have someone to find.” 

“Thought King said to stay put.” She didn’t look impressed at all. 

“Sona, do not patronize me right now-” 

“Kinda hard to leave when Tempest forgot his keys.” She raised said set of keys up, clicking her tongue. “I’m driving. Boss man ordered me to stay back as well.” 

“No-” 

“Do you want to run into King? I know which district he took with some of the guys.” 

Sona unlocked the doors, sliding into the driver’s seat with ease. Jeonghan took the passenger side and Seokmin grumbled that he was in the backseat of his own car. 

“By the way, you guys aren’t as slick as you think.” 

“Yeah yeah, shut up. Now help me find Mouse and I’ll raise your salary.” 

“On it, boss.”

You were unsure of how long you had been standing in the dark. 

Nightmare , as you had come to learn your torturer’s name, was true to his word, not wanting to waste any time. 

After the cut to your cheek, his actions only started to ramp up. You went from sitting in the old metal chair to standing with your bound hands above your head, connected to a hook keeping you upright. Your feet barely touched the floor on your tiptoes and the rope continued to dig harshly into your wrists until they started to bleed. Joker had one of their underlings get another bucket of water and threw it on you again. 

The shivering that you couldn’t control had used so much of your energy to stay warm but it did nothing to help. Dickhead, as you called Nightmare going forward, got an electric powered generator and jumper cables with wet sponges clamped to them. With you standing, he slashed your shirt off with the pocket knife from earlier, the blade catching on your skin and leaving a cut to your stomach. You groaned in pain, jaw clenched tightly to the point you thought your teeth might chip. 

“You’ve got quite the history here.” Joker started, sitting down in the chair you were in previously. He crossed his legs and leaned back, obnoxiously if you might add, and raised a brow at the information in hand.

You didn’t give him an answer, breathing deeply through your nose and watching him past your eyelashes. He flipped through some papers, an annoying hum floating its way across the room from him. Dickhead stepped closer, cable tongs in hand with what you assumed was rubber gloves covering up to his forearms. 

“It wasn’t easy to find some of this information,” He started, stopping on one particular page. “Y/N L/N. Your records have a lot of redactions too.” 

The scoff you let out was followed by a huff, trying to adjust your wrists to relieve some pressure but your footing was hard to find, making it hard to find any comfort or relief. 

“And somehow you went from a normal person with a tragic past to getting all tangled up in SVT, didn’t you? How did you manage to do that?” Joker narrowed his eyes when you didn’t answer. “I asked you a question.” 

Dickhead jabbed the wet sponge against your base side, holding it there. The muscles in that area tensed up and the painful vibration of electricity shot through your system. You let out a cry of pain that had your breath catching in your throat, unable to move away from it to escape the pain.

“Will you answer me?” He asked over your shouts, apathetic to the situation. “Anything?” 

“Fuck off!” You yelled, thrashing until Joker gave a signal for his companion to stop. An angered roar left you, quickly taking in air to fill your burning lungs. 

Shaking his head, Joker clicked his tongue like a disappointed parent, a long sigh leaving him. “Oh, Mouse, so far we have been so kind to you, haven’t we, Nightmare?” 

“Very.” Once more, the sponge was pressed into your side with the second joining the other side.

The entirety of your body tensed up. You screamed loudly, muscles twitching and seizing. The moment the cables were removed, you fell limp, unable to hold yourself up. The pain in your wrists felt welcoming compared to the numbness and weakness that washed through you. There was a faint tingling where you were shocked, the unstable racing of your heart beating out of your chest and up into your throat. 

Tears welled up in your eyes as your head hung down. Dizziness swirled your vision, the floor and walls felt like it was moving in a million different directions. The ache in your side stung when you managed to shift but you didn’t give them the satisfaction of hearing you weep. 

They exchanged a few hushed words before you were left alone, the lights flicking off. Left in complete darkness, you allowed yourself a moment of reprieve, hoping to be prepared for whatever they inflicted upon you next. 

All you heard from the last however long was the mind numbing dripping of water from that leaky pipe. Your throat was dry and every breath felt like sandpaper, scratchy and irritated. The room was freezing, on top of being doused twice previously in water and your energy was rock bottom. 

“You’ll be okay, Mouse.” You whispered into the blank space. “You have to be okay. They won’t kill you. They can’t. It isn’t their endgame.” 

Your eyelids felt heavy, threatening to close as the exhaustion took over. You had little to no feeling in your arms from them being raised for so long, pins and needles stinging the nerves in your upper limbs. The headache transitioned long ago into a migraine, and the pain at your waist continued to tingle and sting in the chilled air. 

While you should have been worried for yourself, you couldn’t stop yourself from worrying about everyone else. 

Was Seokmin okay after finding out you had been taken? How were Jeonghan and Joshua holding up? Had any of them got any rest? Were they eating at all? How were the rest of the groups holding up? Were they close to finding you? 

You craved the safety of being around them. Their presence was what held you together when everything went wrong and right now you were alone, holding onto hope. There were cracks in the foundation of your stability. Mentally you could hold it together longer, but you were concerned of how long that hold out would be. Physically…that troubled you more, already feeling sluggish. If they came in and unhooked you, there would be no stopping you from crumbling to the floor.

Letting your eyes shut, you took in slow breaths, grounding yourself to the reality of the situation weighing down on you. 

“Have you thought about what your future would have been if you hadn’t met us?” Joshua ran his hand up and down your spine, laying on the couch in your apartment, a calm weekday night. 

You laughed, nodding your head. “At first, yeah, but not for a little bit now. I had this decent life plan the moment I left college, like one of those dreams that manifest from watching too many rom-com movies.” 

Joshua joined in your laughter, resting his cheek over the top of your head. “Tell me about it, please?” 

“When I first moved into my old apartment, I told myself three things.” You thought back, unable to stop the giggle from bubbling out. “First, I wanted to steadily climb the ladder at work to live a comfortable life where I didn’t need to worry too much about money.” 

“Got it, so you kinda have that with us.” Wrapping both arms around you, Joshua placed a kiss on your forehead. “Minus the work ladder thing, of course. Sounds boring.”

“Second…my plan was to find myself a significant other after I had the stability I craved. I remember wanting the stupid suburb house with the stupid little white fence.” You rested your chin on his chest, seeing him try not to laugh. It did sound a little dumb. “Number three…” 

Noticing your hesitation, Joshua raised a brow, pouting a little. “Number three?” 

Pushing yourself up, you straddled his hips, smiling to yourself as you shook your head. “I wanted to get married one day… Give myself a life I didn’t know I wanted until I was mostly free of my past. I…wanted a family too so I could be the parent mine weren’t to me.” 

Joshua stared up at you, wide eyed but a glimmer of fondness shining. He gazed over your face, placing his hands gently on your hips before that loving, familiar smile spread on his lips. He scoffed but his grin continued to grow wider until he couldn’t any further. 

“What?” 

“Now that you are here with us, what do you think now?” 

Reaching out, you pushed some hair back from his face and cupped his cheeks. “Well, I kinda have one and I pretty much have the second one, times two.” 

“And number three?” Leaning up on his elbows, he tilted his head to the side. 

“Hm…” You smirked, biting your lip to hold in your snicker. “You’ll have to fight Jeonghan for that one…Maybe even Seungcheol.” 

“Ew, gag.” Joshua fake gagged and you fell forward onto him, wheezing out a laugh.

“Need to spend less time with Seungkwan and Mingyu, babe.” 

—

“Y/N?” Your head snapped up to the sound of Jongho’s voice from behind you. Just as you had much earlier in the night, you watched as he crawled out the window to join you on the roof, a blanket wrapped around his shoulders and another one in hand. “It’s freezing out here, dude.” 

“If it’s so cold, you didn’t have to join me. You know I don’t mind sitting out here.” You took the blanket he offered either way, letting him settle close to your side. “Can’t sleep?” 

“Not really. I tried for a while but I kept tossing and turning.” He tucked his knees in towards his chest, pulling the blanket tighter around his shoulders. There was a dark bruise already blooming on his cheek. You grabbed his chin and turned his face towards you to see it better. “I didn’t wash the dishes right so he hit me.” 

You didn’t hesitate to throw your arm over his shoulder and pulled him close. He, though typically adverse to affection, leaned his head on your shoulder. You could feel his posture slump and a sigh puffed out in the cold air. 

“I’m sorry, hun.” You rested your cheek against the top of his head, “I’m gonna get us out of here, promise.” 

“How do you think you’ll do that?” 

“Your pick; bottle rocket, sugar in the gas tank, vegetable oil in the engine, or calling child services.” You were glad to hear his giggle, a big grin on his face. “Or I could do all over them at once and really fuck them over.” 

“Bottle rocket in the exhaust pipe?” He suggested and you laughed quietly, not wanting to wake your foster parents. 

“I can definitely start there. It will take some time to get it since I got to be sneaky.” Ruffling his hair, you sighed, leaning your head back to stare up at the sky. “We’ll be okay, Jongho.” 

“What if they separate us?”  He sounded worried. “What then?” 

“Then…” You tried to think of the best thing to say at the moment. “Then you face the world with your head held high and remember that you are a smart kid. You make sure you keep your grades up so you get into a good college to be successful in the future.” 

“Do you think I’ll ever see you again?” Jongho lifted his head from your shoulder, wide eyes staring back with worry. 

“Yeah, you will definitely see me in the future.” Internally you weren’t so confident but you pinched his cheeks, seeing him cringe and swat your hands away. “I’ll make sure we see each other in the future. And I sure as hell hope fate helps with that.” 

“I’m gonna miss you, Y/N.” 

“I’m gonna miss you too, Jongho.” 

They had been out searching for hours . 

Joshua’s skin was crawling with well hidden anxiety but Seungcheol was fuming every step of the way. While he attempted to keep a level head, Cheol wasn’t hesitating to tear things apart as time went on. The leader would enter a space with authority and at the drop of a hat would have him and their men that they brought along trashing a space before moving on when Mouse wasn’t found. 

“It’s been hours, how has no one found any signs of her?!” For the first time, Seungcheol vocalized his anger, standing in the most recent drug den they raided. 

Joshua ran a hand through his already tousled and knotted hair, sighing for the hundredth time within the last two hours. Leaning himself against a half broken table after checking its stability, he placed his hands on his knees, taking a few deep breaths. Cheol’s anger was palpable and it was starting to get to Joshua and pull at his last string of resolve.

“We have hundreds searching the city, we’ve been searching. It would be a good idea if we branch out from the city and look at surrounding areas.” Joshua heaved out the suggestion, throwing a hand up in thought. “I don’t know where else we can look around here, Cheol.” 

Seungcheol pulled his phone out and made a call to Wonwoo, asking him to contact half their help to expand their search further out. Joshua watched as his friend paced, pulling at his hair, shaking with unraveled concern and frustration. 

“What do you mean Seokmin and Jeonghan are gone?” He stopped his pacing, confused as his eyebrows furrowed together. “Where-? Huh? With? Okay…Fuckers…Just, tell them not to be fucking idiots and that Sona is in charge of them- Yeah, just keep me updated on anything you guys find and I’ll keep you updated here.” 

As he hung up, Joshua scoffed, shaking his head. “What did you expect them to do? Listen in a situation like this?” 

“No but- I don’t know- At least they have one person with them…” Seungcheol grumbled, still fuming down at his phone. “We are going on hour seven and nothing. How does someone simply disappear without a trace?” 

Swallowing down the lump in his throat, Joshua let his eyes well with tears, jaw clenched uncomfortably tight. He dropped his head, raising a hand to rub and message at the back of his neck. His shoulder, neck, and back were tense, moving wasn’t the best idea but he was running on waning adrenaline, maybe a coffee from the morning, and anxiety. The necklace Mouse had given him for Christmas rested heavy around his neck as he felt the metal against his hand. Joshua let himself trace the chain and brought it to his lips, gently kissing the pendent. 

They were going to find Mouse, he had been chanting it every building they entered into and tore top to bottom. No figurative stone was going to go unturned but he worried for the state she’d be in once they got her home. While he knew Mouse was strong and could withstand a decent amount, what were the people that took her submitting to her to? Was she holding onto hope like they were trying to? It was getting difficult to keep his head on straight. 

Cheol rested himself against the broken desk beside Joshua, shoulders slumping. “I’m starting to think like Han, Shua.” 

“Yah,” Joshua’s head shot up, barely holding back the tears that threatened to fall. “Don’t you start with that shit either. Come on, man.” 

“I-” Cheol paused, raising his hands to his face and sniffling, which caught Joshua off guard. “Fuck, man. I can’t fall apart right now.” 

“Do not-” Joshua shuttered, unable to keep his voice stable. He let the tears he was holding in slip down his cheeks. 

Seungcheol threw an arm over Joshua’s shoulder and tugged him into his side. Though quiet, they cried in relative silence, letting the stress of the situation take hold of their emotions. The grip on Joshua’s shoulders was tight as Cheol muttered something he couldn’t make out, maybe a prayer, grounding the two of them to reality. Neither of them heard the footsteps approach but a voice caught their attention. 

“ King, Hades ?” There was hesitation in their crew member’s voice, a nervous shift to his gaze. “We- Uh…The entire place is fully clear, even the underground sections. Whenever you are, we are all ready to move out again.” 

Almost instantly, Joshua straightened up, wiping his face and stood. “We’ll meet you out at the cars, clear out.” 

Once he stepped out and walked away, Cheol sighed.

“I don’t think she is strong enough like the rest of us, she probably can’t withstand anything they might do to her.” Seungcheol ran both hands over his face, collecting his emotions as he stood, shaking his head. 

“Hey, man, don’t underestimate my girlfriend.” Joshua’s attempt at a joke was met with a roll of the leader’s eyes. He brought the pendant on his lips again, saying a silent prayer for her safety. “She will be okay. Mouse is a fighter. I’m sure she is giving whoever took her a run for their money.”

“I hope you are right on this one.”

“All you have to do is answer the question, Y/N…” 

“And like I keep saying,” You spit out a decent amount of blood, thrashing despite your arms still being hung above your head, “Sit on a cactus, suck a dick, and choke on it.” 

Beside you, Dickhead clicked his tongue, ready to aim another punch to your side. It would make for the tenth punch or kick he had landed as far as you counted. Both sides of your abdomen and the left side of your face hurt like hell. You didn’t even want to imagine how you looked…Hell, you were having difficulty keeping your left eye open from the hits to your face. Joker stopped him though, standing up and strolling over towards you slowly, shaking his head. 

“You know,” He took a knife from the other man’s belt and unsheathed it. “You are holding on much longer than any of us expected. Here I thought you'd break a long time ago, but here we are… Is it the trauma from finding your parents dead from an OD?” 

You swallowed thickly and tried not to say anything to his inquiry, needing to breathe through your mouth from how bad your face and nose felt. With the knife in hand, biting down on the inside of your cheek, unsure of his reactions in comparison to his counterpart seeing as he only asked questions so far. 

“Or…was it when you snuck into that building and saw SVT?” 

You stopped breathing, snapping your mouth shut. 

How fucking long had they been watching you? 

“You saw, what? Two people get shot?” He started to circle your hanging form like you were prey, toying with the knife. “Or…was it when Mingyu was shot?” 

That…yeah, that struck a cord inside that had you snarling at him. “Keep his name out of your mouth, pig!” 

“Oh~” He chuckled lowly, tilting his head to the side. “Protective, aren’t we?” 

Joker leaned close, using the knife to brush your hair back. “Would you like to know a secret?” 

When you gave no reaction, he brought his lips close to your ear. “We gave the order to shoot first.” 

If you were an old cartoon character, steam would be blowing out your ears comically. 

You pulled your head away from him before quickly slamming the side of your head into his face. There was the telltale, unmistakable cracking sound and he yelled out at the unexpected pain. Your head spun from the nonstop migraine you’ve had pounding since you first woke up, yet the pain was welcoming compared to their treatment. Your cheek and eye area were pulsing, definitely swollen, along with the pain in your side from the electrocution. Dickhead was having fun using you as a punching bag when you didn’t answer Joker . 

“You…are going to regret that.” Joker got into your field of vision properly, eyes full of rage. 

His nose was broken if the cracking of bone wasn’t enough, slightly tilted to the side, crooked. Blood trailed down from his nostrils and into his mouth, making him spit off to the side. 

Harshly, his hands jutted out and wrapped around your neck, sneezing and cutting off your air flow. You gasped for air, struggling against your confines and swinging your legs out to get him away but it was useless. His grip tightened and the longer he strangled you, the more your vision started to get hazy around the edges. The moment your eyes started to roll back, on the verge of passing out, and your thrashing became sluggish, Joker released his hold. 

The rush of air that filled your lungs was enough to make you go limp. Your head was light in the worst way and your extremities were shaky. Blood rushing through your ears hindered you from hearing their conversation, not that there was a care to give other than breathing. You did notice one of them move before the chain holding the hook up was loosened and your body crumbled unceremoniously to the floor. 

Your bound wrists were grabbed as someone dragged you across the ground, the half broken ceiling lights fading in and out of your clouded vision. There was barely any energy left to struggle, too lethargic and woozy to figure out what they were doing with you. Whoever was dragging you dropped your arms and another pair of hands were tying your legs together.

You tried to focus your eyes on one of the men in the room, their words murky and distant but quickly stopped to save your strength. The light above that stared down at you was blocked by Kihyun’s big fucking head and his ugly ass smirk. He said something you couldn’t hear so you didn’t provide a response, only for a swift kick to land against the side of your abdomen and the pain had you curling in on yourself. From the feeling alone, you had a good handful of broken ribs, at least you were feeling something at this point. 

A few sets of hands grabbed you next, hauling you up from the cold ground and carrying you somewhere. You were dead weight in their arms but they didn’t seem to struggle, being tossed in a crate or box. Furrowing your brows together, you let your good eye flit around, confusion flooding your mind. 

“Wait-” The moment everything clicked, you cleared your throat, rough and frail from Joker’s strangling. Two unknown men went to close the top and you attempted to set up, shaking your head quickly. 

“Wait no-” Someone’s hand forcibly pushed you down and the box was closed and locked shut. You beat your hands against the top, darkness shrouding you. “Let me out!” 

The words had no force behind them, weak screams only bouncing off the walls of your confines. Continuously, you beat your restrained hands and feet against the top and sides as the panic rose in your chest. There wasn’t a way to calm yourself, breathing coming out in short, sobbing gasps. At some point you couldn’t make out any of the words you desperately tried to babble out. You hopelessly dropped your limbs, praying your eyes adjusted to the limited light soon. 

You couldn’t shift comfortably – or at all –, knees bent up with no way to straighten out. The only soothing thing was the cool metal against your barely clothed back, which gave you an answer of what kind of box you were in. The anxiety of being locked in used up the rest of your energy, your throat and sides hurt horrible, and your waning brain power struggled to take in the situation Monsta X placed you in. 

As your eyes adjusted, you noticed the decent sized air holes from what you could tell, but they were near your feet so you couldn’t look out and investigate around. Any attempt to focus on hearing anything came up short, your ears hadn’t stopped ringing. Raising your wrists enough to see them, you determined there was no chance to get free, not even your legs with how small the space was. 

Leaning your head back with a soft thunk, you took the pain radiating through your body as a sign that you weren’t dead . You’d grasp tightly on that fact to keep you going until you were home, however long that could be. You weren’t sure how much more your body could take. Nightmare didn’t pull a single punch or kick, he was uncaring with slashing, and the eclectic shocks had your heart all over the place. Now, in the metal box, you couldn’t even begin to imagine what they were going to hurt you with next. 

You didn’t realize you passed out until a loud, rattling bang jolted you awake. The entire box shook violently and you shrieked in terror at the suddenness of it. Your body shook, tensing up in anticipation of another hit to come. 

The knowing feeling of a looming panic attack built up quickly, fully triggered when hit after hit beat down against the metal. Whatever items they were beating your confines with was making a deafening, metal on metal sound. It reverberated off the walls, never letting up, and you struggled to breath through your (justified) hysteria. No amount of screaming or pleading was going to stop their task of your torture and their entertainment. 

You knew it probably wasn’t long yet it felt like it went on for hours. With your back fully against the bottom, you felt every single vibration like it shocked your system. It hurt even if it wasn’t hitting you directly. You could make out the edges of the box denting from certain hits, making the already small space smaller the longer it went on. 

With your hands bound, you weren’t even about to cover your ears to block out some of the sound. 

“Make it stop!” You screamed at the top of your lungs, hearing your voice echoing in your ears, kicking at the sides the best you could. 

It didn’t stop, tears were streaming down your face as you wailed helplessly. Trembling was the only thing you could do besides pray for relief. 

You could feel yourself beginning to slip into a dissociative state, maybe from self preservation. The banging was starting to sound far off in the distance, out of body the longer it went on. The last time you really had a dissociative episode was in the shower after Mingyu was shot. You could remember the metallic smell of blood, similar to the inside of the box that surrounded you. There was that nauseating feeling in the pit of your stomach like you were falling out of the sky. The air around you was stuffy, your breathing was shallow the more you disconnected from reality. 

If the hits stopped, you weren’t able to tell. The repeated sound replayed in your head in time with the beating of your heart. Any pain you felt was pins and needles, or washing over with numbness, mind and body attempted to regulate their functions to protect you, if your body could protect you.

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[quickdeaths]

"I'm aware that it doesn't matter to Future Foundation, Miss Nevermind, but it matters to me." Shinobu let out a soft sigh. "I don't wish to make myself out to be your protector, or someone to whom you owe anything." That wasn't how she thought, and it was important to impress that upon Sonia. Shinobu had her vanity and her arrogance still, in some places, but to be so self-aggrandizing at this point in her life was unlike her. "But, if the rest of my organization is indifferent, and the world you're soon to inhabit is against you, then, I'd rather you have at least one person on your side."

Her hands were holding hers softly, and what Shinobu wanted to do was slip one of her own from Sonia's grasp, and gently cradle the side of her face. This was the woman who was so resigned to everything in her future? The woman who believed that she deserved everything awful that happened to her? The woman who looked in the mirror and saw in it nothing good reflected back? Were it not so serious a moment, Shinobu might have found it humorous enough to laugh, in their own fragile way.

No, Sonia Nevermind had always been a good person, and Shinobu had known that from the night they'd first met. What other explanation was there for her attempting to extract such a promise? They were friends, perhaps, but Shinobu knew they couldn't be equals, not so long as she was a Future Foundation agent. If Sonia resented her for her freedom and position, Shinobu could never have blamed her. But instead, she sat beside her, urging her to reach out and take happiness for herself. It was earnest and genuine. The least Shinobu could give her in return was the same genuine sentiment, even if there were truths she couldn't speak.

Softly, she squeezed Sonia's hand as she once again looked at her, gazing into Sonia's cool blue eyes without blinking. Her own eyes were intense, Shinobu was sure, as they always were, but she tried to keep her expression as gentle as she could to properly convey her feelings. "You're kind to care so much about my well-being, and my future. Thank you, Miss Nevermind. Truly." It was a gift for another person to be worried about her, to consider her feelings and her desires, even when they might have conflicted with Sonia's own.

The truth was that there was nothing else she wanted. There was no career that suited them, and no home to return to. The family estate could have been destroyed, and were it not, then her pond was rotten with the corpses of her pets and the winds had scattered the rock garden sand such that it would take days to fix. So many of her friends were long-dead, and both her mentor and her girlfriend had been killed recently too. There was nothing back there for her except an empty apartment too large for one lonely woman.

Not that she'd say as much, of course. She'd told Sonia of her life before, but right now, there was no reason to make her feel guilty due to the state of things. Instead, they just nodded. "Alright, Miss Nevermind. I promise." Still looking at her, they gave her hands another small squeeze. "In the event that I decide that I no longer with to be with you in Novoselic, I'll put in my request to leave immediately." That day would not come - Shinobu was sure of it. It was a promise easy to make with that in mind, secure in the knowledge that the thing she would want most in this world would be to be at Sonia's side.

Only then did Shinobu break eye contact, gently bringing her hand away from Sonia's, and standing up from her seat. "But, it's been a long night, Miss Nevermind, and I imagine we might both be up a while longer with all the excitement that's gone on." The movie was still running, but even if it was quite cute, Shinobu had since stopped paying close attention. She supposed that was only natural when Sonia was being rather earnest and charming beside her, instead. "Can I get you something to drink, or, can I make you something to eat that's a little more substantial than popcorn?"

Shinobu insisted she'd thought it through, but Sonia wasn't convinced. She'd considered the logic of it, yes, and providing some comfort to her, a queen of a nation who didn't deserve it. But that was all, and it wasn't the whole picture as far as Sonia was concerned. "Well, I am not going to doubt your physical and mental capabilities for the job, that is not my place to say," She began carefully. She wasn't wrong: it wasn't the place of any of the former Remnants to speak out against the Future Foundation. Barring Hajime who, no matter the member of the Future Foundation he faced, could find fault in their line of thinking. Probably why Naegi alone handled him, Sonia supposed.

Still, it only felt strange to be asked such a thing because, at the end of the day, she wouldn't have a say in it. She'd be assigned someone to fulfill their duties first and foremost to the Future Foundation, not to her, and be the only person from the Japanese headquarters who would dare make the journey to Novoselic. A place where, if she understood the coverage from the papers, had begun to thoroughly renounce their interest in Japanese culture in favor of European traditions. Ones that didn't glorify the former Princess, now Queen Sonia, but European traditions nonetheless. Most of the Japanese expats who had survived The Tragedy in Novoselic faced constant hostility from the native citizens. Even those who simply looked Japanese but weren't were subject to discrimination, according to reports.

Shinobu couldn't look at her. Just as well, she was difficult to look at after The Tragedy, and maybe she was beginning to realize just how dire a future was being sentenced to Novoselic with a known mass murderer. And if she couldn't say it, it would be up to Sonia to do so. With a deep sigh, in the most diplomatic fashion she could.

"I do not think it will matter much to the Future Foundation if the person sent to accompany me is sympathetic or not. As long as I stay alive and fulfill my country's and the Future Foundation's conditions," Sonia admitted. That was truly too optimistic for the likes of the organization, considering Sonia's happiness and interests in it all. "I just don't know if you've really considered the extent of what you're suggesting, Yaguchi. I meant what I said, I certainly don't object to your company and do like having you around, but you must consider the long-term implications."

"For all that you have suffered, you are a hero in this Tragedy. Japan, and the majority of the world, acknowledge you with the utmost praise and respect. You helped save millions of lives and, in that, you have a whole life ahead of you now."

Sonia paused for a sip of now-lukewarm tea. It was the most she'd said in quite some time, and after the birthing of the kittens she was feeling fatigued herself (though nothing compared to the mother cat, of course). "You can do anything you want: have a career, even something you hadn't considered whilst at Hope's Peak. Have a wife. Have a family. The world has changed, Yaguchi, and you can have whatever life you wish. You don't have to be condemned to a cold, crumbling castle for the rest of your life the way I must, married to one of the last surviving aristocrats that my country and the Future Foundation have selected for me so I may keep the royal lineage intact. I just..."

She set down her mug, wondering the best way to phrase it. With a small shake of her head, she reached over to take both of Yaguchi's hands in her own: if the other woman wouldn't look at her, she'd ensure she'd pay attention to her words regardless. "I just do not want you to sentence yourself to a small, sheltered life, one that is always in danger because of me. I will not object to you accompanying me but the moment you wish to leave, you must put in a transfer and leave Novoselic. I would never hold it against you. I want you to live, Yaguchi, and have a life you make for yourself. All of us former remnants, we will never have that. And we do not wish that fate on anyone. I certainly don't wish that for you, a prison sentence of an existence. Will you promise me that? That you will leave when you want to go somewhere else?"

[sysig]

Go play pretend on your own (Patreon)

[faaun]

procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally

[marmolita]

getting back into ffxv 5+ years after the first time means I have to migrate my playlists to a new music app, which sadly I have to do by clicking on each individual song because every service hates me and I hate them all too

also this has revealed to me that Google mysteriously deleted some of my files (don't worry I have a backup)

BUT more importantly I am reconnecting with my Noctis playlist, which includes discovering that I still remember all the words to some Gackt songs from 2000 😅