#it's always interesting to hear other peoples opinions and perspectives. especially on something like this

[simplydnp]

personally i cannot get on the marriage hill because i feel like they have already crossed that hill without us knowing, or if they havent already they may just not be planning to. obv i dont know anything about their personal life so maybe im way off base here lol but i just feel like they've already committed to each other for the rest of their lives, thats been done! they did it 15 years ago and they've done it a hundred times since then! buying a house together is the big one where i feel like they either already got married before that and never told us, or they consider that theyre already committed enough that they don't feel the need to get married, since at this point marriage for them would just be a piece of paper. not to mention during the devan wedding video they talked about how uncomfortable a wedding would be so i feel like they've decided that they dont need to make it "official"

i think not being on it is fair. love it, hate it, whatever, but we would Know if they had done so in secret. at least, from a legal standpoint. who knows if they did a little thing for just themselves at some point--but to me, that's different than Marriage-marraige, if that makes sense.

they have been committed for a very, very long time. i hesitate to say right from the start because we just have the benefit of hindsight to know that it ended up there, but it's been there for a while.

maybe it's the romantic in me, but i want them to have that Moment. to celebrate them. where, truly, nothing else matters except them and what they mean to each other. for them to get to bring the important people in their life together and enjoy it. for them to finally breathe. and not have to worry, or think, or hesitate in living their life. obviously there will still be walls and boundaries and i don't expect to see them making out in a video, but to just exist without fear. or stress. or anxiety. to be able to show the things they really Do want to; to be able to go do the things they really want to do. that's what i want for them.

it's less about 'marraige is the final step!' and more like it's the first one into the rest of their lives.

one of the biggest themes throughout this fandom's existence, and particularly since the hiatus began, is that we just want them to be happy. to be free of expectations and pressure and speculation and erasure. and i think that's what marraige hill means to a lot of people.

to speak for myself for a moment: i've got very haggard relationships and depictions of love in my life. it feels hollow in many ways. it's described as vibrant and overwhelming and terrifying and beautiful--but for me it's... empty. i read about how it sweeps people off their feet, or it slowly builds over time, or maybe it's always been there--and i can't help but want that. even just being around it is filling for the soul. i think witnessing joy and happiness is critical to our existence. to physically see love in the world. and maybe it's cheesy and maybe it's parasocial, but i want dnp to have their happy ending. cause the twisted, chunk of meat in my head thinks that's how it's supposed to go. how it should be. is people should get to be happy, and for many of them, that includes being in love. maybe it's outdated maybe it's old-fashioned, maybe it's the ex-catholic in me, but that's what marraige should be. and maybe it's the idea that people do get there and it is possible. and it really is this beautiful thing.

in terms of their stances on it, you offer that you think they're committed enough and they may not want it--which, is a fine opinion to have. it's been a very long time since either of them have really truly talked about marraige and weddings, and add the fact that they're both private people and don't even talk relationship stuff candidly, so anything presented, i take with a grain of salt. and i don't think disliking aspects of a wedding and then also wanting one are mutually exclusive. i think there's plenty of ways to eliminate aspects and still do it. their agreement on it, to me, signals they've talked about it.

and especially with how things have been lately--with how much has changed in the last few months for them even--i don't think the option is off the table for them.

they well and truly killed the joint branding in 2018 and buried it. there were glimpses of their togetherness during the hiatus, but WAD especially pushed back on things. and yet, just a few months after it ended, they agreed to a why not--knowing it would mean inviting us back into it again. inviting in people to see. and instead of hard lines and rigid restrictions, they keep loosening the reins. and i genuinely think them being back, and us being here too, has completely changed the trajectory of their life. i don't think either of them expected to tour together again. for them to truly enjoy this. phil may have hoped, but he wasn't gonna push it if dan wasn't willing. so now that they're here, so many possibilities have opened up. and, to me, it feels like they're building momentum. and while some of that was likely for the tour, it still feels like we're heading somewhere. i've got that same gut feeling i did during ii.

take it or leave it, those are my thoughts. i doubt we'll truly know until they either do it or don't.

[mrchoppedslefthand]

[SPOILERS] Homicipher Is Actually Romantic, Convince Me Otherwise [Analysis/Opinion] [SFW]

Word count: 3,332

Edit: 11/7/2024

[Feel free to skip to the last objective "Individual route discussion + what made it romantic" if you want to get straight to the point]

Homicipher is truthfully a romantic (or platonic) game. It is a game that has to be looked at from a different perspective when it comes to love/romance. A game where you have to take in consideration of the characters and the nature of their 'other world'. Today's post will discuss into what I believe made Homicipher an oddly, but romantic game, despite its shortcoming and abrupt ends.

⚠️[MAJOR LORE/CHARACTER ROUTE SPOILERS] ⚠️

Discussion Objectives:

Definition of Love & how it plays into Homicipher

The nature of the 'other world' and ghosts

Individual route discussion + what made it romantic (thoughts)

What Is Love & How Does It Play Into Homicipher?

Love has many layers of definition and associations. Maybe, that is why some may deem Homicipher to be "unromantic" and some disagree on that thought. It also varies based on the type of content/exposure you had consume in the category of love [whether romantic or platonic]. Socially, from a common standpoint, love is a strong attachment or affection for someone. Often from a social standpoint associated with dates, affection, and intimacy. However, love is always changing, since it is a social script on what its suppose to be, and changes as society progresses. Some notions stay the same but some begin to change (just like how language and certain concepts begin to change in the other world, a different society from our own). For the sake of a "true" definition of love. I will be using the definition offered by the Oxford Language Dictionary. So, what is love?

Love as a noun is...

"An intense feeling of deep affection"

"A great interest and pleasure in something"

"A person or thing that one loves"

Love as a verb is...

"Feel deep affection for (someone)"

"Like or enjoy very much"

Not long after its release there had been a fair number of comments/reviews criticizing Homicipher for its lack of romance. This claim is NOT entirely wrong. From the expectations of a "normal" Otome/dating sim it doesn't necessarily meet the requirements because of its lack of intimacy, affection and interest from a HUMAN/SOCIETAL perspective. We must remember that romance/love does not necessarily equate to kissing, hand holding, and intimacy especially considering that these are the HUMAN (societal) views on what romance/love is. A concept that had become lost in the 'other world'. So how can we call Homicipher romantic if we have to cross out the influence of our society? The answer is that we can't fully avoid it, HOWEVER, we must be open to a different perspective of what 'their' version of love is (platonic love/or romantic). No matter how lacking, dense, twisted and grotesque the moments we have spent with these ghosts are. In some shape and form it CAN equate itself to love (platonic/ or romantic). I think a lot of people forget that time itself can be equate to some complicated level of love. The fact you spend time with someone, and it develops to something further for worse or better, something that even love may not be able to name, is what this game demonstrates.

Homicipher has a consistent theme, the loss of truth, the acceptance of ignorance and the concept of eternity. Which shockingly is where the romance comes from. When we allow ourselves to rot in that world. When we ignore the exit and choose to stay, is where the romance comes through. Love is complicated. What can I say?

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

The Nature of the 'Other World' & Ghosts

Alot of the ghosts we encounter can be friendly, but also just as deadly. We hear it from almost all of the casts warning or discussing about how dangerous a lot of the ghosts (including themselves) roam in this world, and in different endings, succumb to this danger ourselves. The longer we stay in this world, we soon start to become no different. As we, a human, begin to slowly transform into a different entity. We begin to react more violently (though it can be argued that since our MC is a serial killer, she might have just been violent and cruel in general). When angered, or things start not to go her way, she gets filled with bloodlust and takes it out on who she's with. Killing is a common thing to do in this world, especially when experiencing anger, sadness and even boredom. The concept of death is a little complicated as they can easily regenerate themselves back to "life". As the game progresses, we learn that some of these ghosts cannot grasp certain concepts (such as love), remember their own name and self, and don't have exact words (sometimes none) for items.

When sometimes even confessing that you like some of the ghosts they question you, and state that they cannot understand you or that feeling (platonic/ or romantic). We are in a setting that is beyond the mortal realm, there aren't any exactly "ideal" dates in a place different from the moral realm... so you're going to be stuck in a scary place, having a scary "date".

However just because they cannot understand the concept of love, doesn't meant that they can't feel it. It is something that the body may still feel, and the mind not being able to put an identity to that feeling or even situation, since meanings and concepts get lost within this realm. The fact that we are allowed to spend an eternity in this realm, with our handsome casts of ghosts. Is oddly and sadly romantic. For Mr. Crawling it is his devotion and loyalty to you, it is how he worries and cares for you, it is his affection and attempts to soothe you. For Mr. Silvair it is his care for you (as research of course lol), your usefulness (which is why he is attracted to you), but even then, one of his endings he keeps you as a head, when you had become useless to him. For Mr. Gap he finds you intriguing, he wants to play and follow you around, always asking for parts of you with consent, loves to brag about himself to you. For Mr. Chopped it is his want to rely on you, to feel safe with you, to protect him, to spend time with him. For Mr. Hood it his willingness to help you for an eternity, to roam with you forever, keeping you away from danger. For Mr. Machete it is the fact you both spend an eternity searching for a home together, to suffer boredom together, to suffer within each other's presence. For Mr. Scarletella it is his obsession for you and his willingness to spend an eternity with you.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Individual Routes + What Made Them Romantic

[Not in any particular order]

Mr. Crawling

If I had to rank who had the most "romantic" route overall, it would be Mr. Crawling. With the definition usage of love from the Oxford dictionary, verb and noun he checks all the list. Not only that, but we spend time with him the most out of all the other casts. He was the very first ghost we meet (briefly in the beginning) and got stuck with. We are like a baby bird imprinting on him because we saw him first and spent time with him the most, so of course we might feel the most attached to him compared to the others. As the game progresses Mr. Crawling doesn't fail to let us know that he cares for us and our safety warning us of the dangers that come and explaining how to navigate our way around danger. He expresses his worries when we disappeared. He seems to have some concept of love (platonic/ or romantic) as he admittedly tells us that he likes us and ask us if we like him. He expresses how he wants to follow and protect us. He also has so many cute scenes! Scenes where he pats our head, scenes where we lay together, chat a lot together. He is devoted and loyal to us, never harming us even once.

We even get a scene where he gets jealous when we called Mr. Chopped cute with the cat headband! So, he also makes an attempt to be cute too! We are always together with him, and that makes us BOTH happy. Although we don't have our traditional romantic dates like shopping, movie night. We get a bed scene and get to take him back home with us.

There are many types of romance. Platonic and romantic. You the reader/player is allowed to view it however you want. The game does not punish you for the lack of interactions with the casts. You just end up missing out on certain scenes/moments with them is all. However, for the sake of this post I will be making attempts to talk about the romantic aspect (but platonic romance can also be put into place).

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Silvair

lt's apparent that Mr. Silvair keeps us as research material and confines us in his lair. He is interested in our body, and also interested in returning our mind/intellect back to its original state. It is this interest in us that makes him "love" us. Does confinement and research count as love? Well...maybe not in terms of human definition but in the Mr. Silvair way, it's the closest thing you can get to romantic (or platonic). Afterall, the concept of love has become lost in this world.

I believe he still has some attachment to us, because in the ending A Head's Life, he still keeps you as a companion along with Mr. Chopped. He claims that you are no longer useful/capable but that it is okay, as long as danger is no longer here. When you choose to ask him why he did what he did and ask if he likes you, he tells you it was for research and that love is something he cannot understand. He also doesn't understand why you get so angry when he helped you return your intellect back. He still though has some sort of concept of empathy, because in his route when you choose to kill him and hide yourself away. He comes follow you and expresses that he's sorry and tells you a little about himself. He allows you free will, at this point, allowing you to leave him or stay with him.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Gap

Mr. Gap always wants a piece of us, literally. Why does he? Because it's just for fun. The most interaction we get with him is through the multiple crevices within this world and the short route he gets in chapter 4. He takes but sometimes may give. However, he doesn't fail to be thoughtful. It's hilarious how in chapter 4 when he offers us a crowbar in exchange for your heart, you can just smack him for it with no consequences. He also likes to brag about himself to you which honestly is a little cute. With his ending Return, we only have him left in the 'other world'. Our comfort lies with him, although he may be a little annoying, he is the only one we have left. We maybe have become a little codependent on him, but maybe he likes that?

God his annoyed/disgusted face is so hilarious, do it again Mr. Gap! He seems to stick around with us mainly just for funsies and being nosy, and honestly, he is so real for that. But it seems he likes to stay around with us at least. In the return end he is with us, and continues to stay lurking, perhaps watching over us until he is needed. Quite handy am I right? Haha.

He is depicted as quite the gentleman, but also just as fun and teasing. There are times where he does help you with no charge, such as barging into his hole (the face he makes in that scene is hilarious). Again, when presented with beating him for your crowbar, he gets a little upset but, honestly still helps you out. He probably thinks violence is funny which is why he constantly still teases you by asking to take away your body parts. It's just too fun!

Someone had brought up to my attention that Mr.Gap tends to ask for parts that can be easy to part with as we progress. Asking for our feet, legs, and fingers instead, when he seems to still clearly prefer the heart over the other parts. He adjusts his request when he realizes we won’t give our heart.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Chopped

Mr. Chopped is just a head; how can he possibly be or have anything romantic? Well, not necessarily to the level of Mr. Crawling but, we get to have a few small moments with him and spend some time with him. Since he is just a head, he can't help but need to rely on others. Of course, he has to be selectively about it because falling in the wrong hands devastates him.

Mr. Chopped when he gets forced into playing with the deer child, he seems happy to see a familiar face and calls us out to help him. Our poor baby was in trouble!

His ending head hunt is tragically sad but also bittersweet. MC cares so much about Mr. Chopped that she spends an eternity as an entity searching for a lost head, searching for Mr. Chopped who she failed to rescue.

During his own special route Mr. Chopped does his best to help us, but there is only so much a head can do. To make up for his lack of body though, he seems to be more expressive with his mouth and emotions. We get to take him to get a haircut and wash his hair. This seems pretty date like to me. Although our time was abrupt and short with Mr. Chopped. It makes me happy that we get this small, cute scene with him, which makes him much more lovable.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Hood

Mr. Hood protects you from harm, and also heeds your commands. He also carries you around. He means no harm and is there to guide. He cares for your safety and seems to dislike anything dangerous or threatening towards him and others that he protects.

At the end of his route, he states how often you get in danger and takes you with him, telling you that he must protect you since you asked him to (referring to an earlier scenario when you asked him to stay with you, when you reunited with Mr. Crawling and the others, but he leaves). So I would assume he would always be by your side now eternally staying together and protecting you from danger when needed. How cute! Some people are into that. But personally, for me Mr. Hood felt more like a father/brother to me. Maybe it was because he was always willing to guide us? But some people are into the brotherly/fatherly type of men, and hey I don't judge.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Machete

At first, I did not see the appeal to Mr. Machete, he seemed like a ghost that killed for boredom and most of the time we just followed him around aimlessly...WELL, after playing his route and letting it soak in my brain. That is entirely the whole point of his character. He is a ghost that had become bored because he had too much time on his hands and continues to search for his home. He is our tsundere dummy macho ghost, and honestly, I love that about him. He could've killed us again like how he tried earlier, but after that first attempt, he reluctantly allows us to follow him. It's funny how much he runs away if the odds are against him, and when he mocks us it's even more hilarious. Mr. Machete likes us if we are strong opponent for him, he even expresses that he thinks we are fun and likes us when we defeat Mr. Hugeface on our own.

Not going to lie, I fell for Mr. Machete right here. We were low on blood, and he just slices his hand, FEEDING us HIS BLOOD. Like OMG that was so hot, he opens our mouth forceful, and we drink his blood. He somewhat cares about us, to be doing all of that for us. After that we get a timed choice to stall or follow him. When you choose to stall he pauses with you and asks if you're okay and to catch up with him. For someone who had been reluctant and annoyed at us for following him, took a moment of his time to wait for you. He WANTED you to tag along with him. We then venture on with him aimlessly searching for his and our home. Torturing each other with our presences. But maybe, just maybe, they can slowly become that home together that they were searching for.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Scarletella

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. At first, he appears to be just any ghost that wants to attack us. It took me a while to warm up to him because of so little we knew about him. I thought he wanted to take our name for fun/or collection, but then it's revealed that he knows us. That he harbors some sort of love and obsession for us and believes that we love him because of all the blood and bodies we "offered" him. In a twisted way, this situation is a cute and romantic misunderstanding. Mr. Scarletella fell in love with us for providing him many blood and bodies. He wants us to spend an eternity with him. He WANTS to spend an eternity with us. He invites us to this other world because perhaps he wants us to become a ghostly being just like him, or maybe he wants to have easier access to us (since his myth that he only appears on rainy days) to meet us. Although we didn't get to have as many interactions with him, that is what makes this love toxic. It is a parasocial love, he fell in love with us from afar. When you piece everything together with your dictionary the words he proposes to you sound like wedding vows when you give your name to him. Which make it all so more lovely, even if he takes our soul away.

(My translation/interpretation of the scene, where he asks for your name)

Chapter 2, Scene 24

Scarletella: "You found your name...?"

Scarletella: "Teach me your name." (ARF ARF WRARF)

Scarletella: "I want you." (YES PLEASE)

Scarletella: "Will you give your name?" (OF COURSE)

Scarletella: "Your name?" (👁️👄👁️)

*You give him your name here*

Scarletella: "I have your name."

Scarletella: "I have obtained you." (YES YOU DID, COME TAKE ME)

Scarletella: "Let's leave together." (ARF ARF WRARFFFFFFFF)

Scarletella: "I love you"

Scarletella: "And you love me."

Scarletella: "You gave it to me...Thank you" (I'LL GIVE YOU IT ALL)

Scarletella: "Forever/eternally together..." (YES SIR)

Scarletella: "Together." (ARF ARF WRARRF ARFA)

He is quite the romancer hehe. It seems like Mr. Scarletella has some form of concept when it comes to love, which is to be together forever, even if you end up as a blood pool. Together is together.

I find it interesting how his two endings: Scarletella and Scarlet Rain parallels each other so well. In the Scarletella ending, we (mc unknowingly) give our consent to being together forever with Mr. Scarletella, but we are still alive. When MC wakes up, she sees a clear umbrella on the floor and picks it up. I believe that we have now embodied or spirited the umbrella, spending eternity with Mr. Scarletella. He owns us now.

However, in the Scarlet Rain end he becomes ours, the umbrella stays red, and we still, eternally are together forever.

[cosmic-ghost-hermit]

What animal do you most resemble and why?

So just so yall know before you go to your piles. The animals in the pictures might not be the creature that you most resemble. I am using the Untamed Spirit Animal Oracle in this reading. Please take what resonates and leave the rest behind but always be open to new perspectives about yourself.

_________

PILE ONE

Astrology: Pisces, Sagittarius, Aries

Song: all i ever wanted by Mazie

Vibes: 🖤💙🔭✈️🕷🦋🕶🎓🐾🌏🌊🫐🍙🧊🎧♟🦽💎⛏🛋📘✒️💤♿️🔊♠️🏁

Cards: Lion, 5 of Cups, 7 of Wands, The Void, Karmic Relationships

Hi, pile 1! Welcome. These cards tell me you look most like a lion. I can see some of you have prominent noses that make your face very lion-like. All of you have the most piercing fierce eyes. I also see you have soft hands and nice nails that you probably get done regularly. You are legit gorgeous and you have this extensive hair routine you do almost every day. You might wear a bonnet to sleep or you have a silk pillow case to protect it. I can also see you are surprised by these compliments. You have some self-esteem issues that frustrate you a lot. These beliefs you have about your physical appearance are built around the opinions of others. First off, they only shit on you cus they are jealous. These cards have a weird undertone of relationships so I think maybe you had a partner at one point who was SUUUUPER jealous of how beautiful you are. Wow, they are pressed about it. They probably said some extremely mean things to you about your appearance that stick with you even though it doesn't look like they are around you anymore. I hear them saying you have RBF or something. You have literally nothing to feel insecure about my dear.. Like you complimented yourself in the mirror around this person and they like immediately tried to knock you down a peg. Dude, that person is SO ENVIOUUS. Don't listen to their words. You need to see through their words to the true emotions behind them. Don't let these jealous people dim you light, girl!!! Their words are not based on reality. It is distorted by their emotions. Just know when they look in the mirror all they hear is their momma tellin them they're ugly as fuck. They were just projecting their insecurities, baby.

PILE TWO

Astrology: Taurus, Leo, Aquarius

Song: Body Talks by The Struts, Kesha

Vibes: 💛🧡❤️💙🎁🧿💰🌅🏖🚦🚚🚎🎯🎭🏅🍹🫐🍂🌊🌈🌏🍁🐠🫂🤖🥶😰

Cards: Badger, 7 of Pentacles, 5 of Wands, The Seven Star Sisters, Jump In

Hey there, pile 2!! You have such an interesting energy. The animal you most resemble is the Badger. So from what I'm reading from the other cards this is less of a physical resemblance and more of an attitude resemblance. The way you hold yourself is like you do not give a fuck what anyone thinks about you. You had many people around you growing up who were considered "conventionally attractive" and for a long time, this bothered you. I think sometimes it does still bother you but you have grown your self-esteem a lot since you were little. You got tired of fighting for attention real quick. You realized how dumb the competition of appearance is and began to explore your expression more for fun rather than to fit in. You have a unique way of expressing yourself, especially with your make-up. Dark eye shadow is your signature look. It makes your already really unique eye color pop like nothing else. You dress very alternatively compared to your siblings and/or friends. The style does have a touch of whimsicalness to it too. I see some of the people who picked this pile have a curvy body type. You keep your hair short for the most part because it's easier to manage while short. You truly have such a fantastic head-turning style. I really do love your energy, my dear. Like, wow you are fucking awesome. I would have looked at you as a kid and wanted to look like you so bad.

PILE THREE

Astrology: Scorpio, Libra, Gemini

Song: The Middle by Jimmy Eats World

Vibes: 🤍🖤🔎🖋🧷📓🩺🔬🔌📷📼🎥🎹🎼🎤🎧🎬🌪🐚🪨🐇🕊🦢🐈‍⬛🕸🐰👟

Cards: Toad, Fox, 8 of Swords, 2 of Wands, Double Mission, Deep Cellular Healing

Oh, pile 3. This is gonna be a kind of shadow work-y kind of reading so just be prepared to be called out okay? Trigger warning for SA. You make yourself ugly on purpose. You hid your beauty from yourself. I dunno exactly what you do to hide it from others but I see you wearing clothes that keep your shape a secret. You do your make-up in a way that accentuates the dark cycles under your eyes. You make yourself look sick and dying. You force yourself to believe you resemble a Toad. I don't blame you, my friend. You went through something truly terrible that made you feel ugly so you express it outwardly constantly. You believe you are ugly because of what happened. What they did to you didn't taint your beauty, homie. You aren't dirty. You aren't hideous or unattractive naturally. You are so scared of what happened, happening again. It makes you put up these defenses in-order to feel safe. My friend you are already safe without these defenses. You might be doing way more harm than good, my friend. If you stopped hiding your true beauty from yourself, you would more resemble a Fox. These cards are encouraging you to heal from what happened to you mentally. Your reaction to what happened isn't wrong but you shouldn't destroy yourself because of how others treated you. You are stunning and so naturally gorgeous. I hear you saying that your feelings about what happened don't matter. That is a lie you tell yourself. That is a lie someone else told you. What happened to you was truly awful. What they did to you was disgusting but it doesn't make you disgusting. It makes THEM disgusting. What THEY did is disgusting. You are beautiful. You are so drop-dead, star-struck glamorous! You aren't a toad. You are a fox. Please embrace your authenticity because you deserve to feel good. You deserve to see your body for what it truly is.

PILE FOUR

Astrology: Cancer, Capricorn, Virgo

Song: Honey And The Bee by Owl City

Vibes: 🤍💖💛🦦😜👄☀️👟🐁👙👑🎂🐱🐻‍❄️🌙🦭🌸🌼🍣🍰⚾️🎗🎟🎲📿

Cards: Otter, Queen of Cups, The Well, A New Earth, Called

Pile 4. You are so fucking cute. Like so cute. Like I feel your energy and all I feel and think is "Awwww~ What a cuuutie!". You most resemble an Otter. Which in my opinion, ARE SO FUCKING CUTE!!! I see you like to color your hair in pastel colors and it's SUUUPER long. Like you have been growing out your hair for a while now. You have this cute little button nose and these super pretty dark eyes. Ohmygods you have no idea how much I think brown eyes are the prettiest eyes. You put a lot of creativity in your outfits so you always look so snatched and dolled up. You like the long flowy dresses and shirts that billow in the wind. They make you look like a fairy. You always smell like incense and sea salt. You probably love swimming or surfing or some kind of sport you play in the water so you are very lean. I see you might be pursuing some kind of profession in the beauty industry. Either that or you just look like a model and people think you are one. You wear these pretty flowers in your hair that give you this gorgeous halo of lavender. You have been absolutely blessed by Lady Aphrodite. She loves you like her child. She blesses you with fashion sense and soft features.

[oiblackestsheep]

what, in your opinion, are an intp’s needs in a relationship? (coming from an infj.) love your blog, you’ve got some amazing insights 🫶

Aww, thanks INFJ anon. 🫶 I try my best to have interesting insights that bring something fresh to the table!

INTP's Needs in a Relationship

I've been in the same relationship for 8.5 years (and we actually MET ON TUMBLR BECAUSE OF THIS BLOG WHICH IS SO FUNNY AND NERDY), all of this to say, I've had a lot of time to think about my relationship needs even from the MBTI perspective as an INTP, because that was how my ENFJ and I kinda started out getting to know, like, what we each needed from each other, so, here we go!

Disclaimer: This is assuming that the INTP is already getting everything that everyone needs in a basic healthy relationship like, you know, feeling emotionally safe and being treated with respect, etc..

Intellectual stimulation: INTPs generally love understanding new things and how they work, so ideally their partner can share that interest with them in some way! They can be pretty curious people, so joining them in their quest for uncovering the "how" and "why" of everything will make them feel understood, themselves, and closer to you in the process!

Clear explanations of your feelings: Because INTPs have inferior Fe, they tend to have a habit of intellectualizing their own emotions when they talk about them, which can cause complications with understanding other people's emotions, too. Finding a way to be patient and know that even healthy INTPs might still struggle with connecting with other people's emotions (especially at first in a relationship) isn't necessarily because they don't want to, but more that it doesn't always come naturally, so they don't always know how to. If they're a healthy person, they will want to understand, just try not to take it personally while they are practicing/learning!

Alone time: This one should be pretty straight-forward lmao. They're introverted, so they like to recharge doing solo-activities, and they're intuitives, so they have their own little theoretical world full of bizarre ideas to entertain themselves with that might not always be easy to follow at first. I find that introverts in general (maybe the INxx types even moreso) like to engage in parallel play where their partner also does something quietly nearby, but still a separate activity. As an INFJ, yourself, I'm sure you can relate in your own way, so it's likely easy to give them what they need!

Humor them/hear them out: This might sound a little vague, and I guess in some ways it is, but this is mostly about their auxiliary Ne. ENTPs and ENFPs get most of the attention when it comes to high Ne, but INTPs (and INFPs, too!) place a lot of importance on it, too, which can often manifest itself in conversations like "what if __", "imagine if __", etc.. To put it bluntly, it might seem a bit... directionless, and that's because sometimes it kind of is! It's just about thinking of random possibilities that are non-serious and funny in the moment, and don't really go anywhere else outside of the current discussion or hold any larger, overarching significance. Sometimes it's less about the actual topic itself, and more about having some random fun and "playing along" that makes a world of a difference to a playful INTP (or high Ne user in general). This point got away from me a little bit which I think, in a way, is the perfect exemplification of what I was trying to say in the first place, lmao. Hope that makes sense! If your INTP ever sounds like whatever the hell I just said, just try not to disengage right away, because they probably have a point that they are struggling to reach. Put that dom Ni to work and summarize it for them, I know you can do it from experience with my own ENFJ lmao.

Anyway, uhhhhh: Every single point on this list has gotten progressively longer because my Ne loves extrapolating (and I love Ne, but sometimes its gotta CHILL you know?), so I'm gonna end it here before it gets WILDLY OUT OF CONTROL.

This was a fun question, anon!: Thanks again for reaching out, and basically giving me full range to just write multiple paragraphs about myself and my relationship!

[necromeat]

A schizoid POV

Feeling nothing towards compliments or criticism is kind of crazy. I know these are positive and negative things, and that people often strive to get more compliments than criticism, and I know people often get happy of the former and upset by the latter, though I know both are essential in healthy human interactions. But I really, really don't give a damn what someone thinks of me or if they try to make me happy or upset. I guess it's just the schizoid way.

Like, I genuinely don't understand why someone would go out of their way to seek compliments, or how, at the end of the day, some criticism should make you upset. I mean, sure, if I put a lot of effort into something, let's say a drawing, and someone says it looks nice, I can say it makes me happy to hear, but more in a logical sense than in an emotional one. And it's even better if they tell me what specifically they like about the drawing, not because I would feel complimented and emotional, but because I like to analyze. And honestly, they could even tell me what they don't like, and then I can perhaps improve in those aspects more, because I always strive to improve, even if at the end of the day I don't feel particularly proud of myself or my accomplishments in an emotional sense. I mean yes, if someone sees my drawing and gives me nothing but rude remarks about how ugly it is, I will feel like it's unfair and unfounded, but even that is more from a logical perspective.

Nothing really feels like anything.

I don't know why, but often when something I do online gets a lot of traction or a lot of likes, I don't really feel any sort of way about it. Should I? I mean, if anything, attention just makes me feel kind of overwhelmed. And this often leads me to just… ignoring that attention until it blows over. However, I do also notice a pattern of valuing my posts through the attention, not in an emotional sense but as in, big number good, small number bad, as if it's a game. When this happens I recognize I need a break, and so I close the app for an indeterminate amount of time.

I always wonder what it's like to feel accomplished or emotionally fulfilled or perhaps even proud of yourself. Lacking in this is probably some kind of hell in itself, but it's all I've ever known. I may throw around some phrases like "I feel proud of myself today because of x", but in reality, under the mask, I don't really know. If you compliment my looks, I can lie and say it made my day, but I don't need you to say I look good when I already knew it beforehand. If you give me your opinion of me unprompted, give me something substantial.

I could go on a tangent about how this reflects the way I treat my friends, though this isn't really about that. Often the conversation around SzPD surrounds our relationships and especially the amount of friends we have. I think I'm pretty social for someone with SzPD, actually. But there's so much more to life than the amount of social interaction you have. And I would go as far as to say that I enjoy the periods of my self in exile. I think it's only good to take a break sometimes and focus on whatever else there is to life than other people. However, as social animals, we do need to return at some point. We need others to stay healthy.

I view everything as a cycle. Everything is kind of temporary. The good things, the bad things, everything in between; it comes and goes. The worst day of your life might as well be followed by the best, and you might not even notice it. Friendships don't last forever with me, and I've already accepted this a long time ago. I'm not trying to be nihilistic, rather, I'm trying to explain how neutral I stay to everything. I still like people despite everything, and always will. Other people are immensely interesting, from a logical standpoint. A lot of people say they can be themselves around me, and I take pride and purpose in this, at least as much as my brain allows me to. I'm an observer, a listener, and it may not be enough to sustain a long-term friendship, but I've made someone happy and comfortable, and sometimes that's enough.

I don't know if this makes much sense anymore, but… Sometimes a compliment makes someone's day, sometimes some gentle criticism helps someone out, and sometimes all they need is to sit down and have someone listen in an unopinionated way.

So go ahead.

[weirdmageddon]

long meditation on jade and dave's relationship - part 1

here's a three-part heavy homestuck meta. took me about 3 days to scrobble together and format and everything

part 2 part 3 cooking

i apologize in advance for the disorganization of my thoughts. after writing it i realized this is probably one of the clearest glances into how my mind thinks associatively so everything relates in some way to something else in here. the foundations for my thoughts might be invisible to others because they can’t see the connections ive built upon but you can probably see them here, and that strong foundation is also why i care so much about them and why i chose to lay it all out. sometimes i feel like i have Got to get this tangled associative web out of my head and into some form of writing so other people can be like, “oh so This is why you have so much to say” and can just. see into my head and where it all comes from for me. people have expressed interest and the general opinion tends to be that people like hearing my thoughts a lot so yeah. pov you are in my brainwebs. seatbelts everyone get on the magic school bus in that bitch

some time ago i saw this post i saw as i was going through florals jade tag again. my homestuck hyperfixation flared up again and ive been hyperfocused on dave and jade and particular just absolutely entering these monotropic black holes over them and turning them around at different angles and looking at discussions and what people thought both now and in the past and now that im older i can appreciate them even more. ive always been a fan of dave and jade both, but i cant even lie dave has my whole heart so maybe im biased as well. but i like to believe that regardless of my liking for dave and interest in not even x-ray scanning him just straight up 3D mri scanning him and rotating him in my head that my argument is still very reasonable. i just understand his psychology a lot

i want to preface this by saying i absolutely love floral and im so glad she’s on the hsbc team because i know she can do jade harley justice. one of the best jadesters fr. we all come into media analysis with different personal experiences and perspectives, and i understand this was from her perspective as someone who had run ins with dumb boys and relates a lot to jade which is why she can put so much love into her <3 i just found myself disagreeing with some of the arguments that she presented in that post just as a peer who also read the comic from my own perspective. keep in mind i also love jade to bits and want the best for her

so yea this isn’t a targeted post at all. it just got the juices flowing and inspired me to actually write my pre-existing thoughts down and i used it as a springboard for them

i think it ended up being pretty insightful overall especially because i was stoned as fuck writing it and ive come to realize being stoned amplifies and improves the output of my deeply inwardly associative thought processes tenfold. or maybe weed just changes how significant it feels. maybe a little of both

part 1: on using davesprite as a basis for interpreting jade's relationship with all daves

i love what hussie does with alternate versions of characters and. it’s one of the coolest things about homestuck’s characterization. like floral quoted:

… we see that Jack is a simple man, no matter what name he goes by. He is, if not much else (and he’s not), impatient and violent. We only got the briefest glimpse into these qualities when we were first introduced to him on Derse. But now we get to spend much more time with him, albeit in the form of a completely different character. This is another bit of sneaky utility provided by this intermission tangent. It serves as an arc to help indirectly characterize the villain of the early acts. Having multiple copies of a character operating in totally different circumstances turns out to be a great stealth characterization tactic, and it gets used much more aggressively later in the story. In fact, it proves to be inseparable from one of the story’s most essential themes. (Hussie’s Intermission commentary)

so i agree in principle and think the alt self thing is fucking brilliant

however, i disagree with the argument it’s supporting.

So, not the same character, but if switched, I would go out on a limb and say that Dave would experience all the same issues as Davesprite did, but without the “bird” part acting as an easy explanation. That doesn’t make Dave responsible but it does speak volumes to how their personalities respond to each other, insinuates that a relationship involving any Dave would end badly for Jade and that “Real” Dave indeed has Some Issues To Deal With.

i don't agree that dave and davesprite should be compared in this context. yes they are splinters of the same character and floral is right on the money in that canon deflecting the relationship failing on "bird issues" doesn't really explain anything meaningful, but i do not think its the case that all of jade’s relationships with dave are doomed to fail because of what we saw with jade and davesprite.

yes, if switched, dave strider would be practically identical to davesprite since they were the same exact person until a branch in the timeline

however, it's the unique things davesprite has been through that made him like this. davesprite has baggage that dave doesn't. a timeline where john was tricked into fighting his denizen early and died and jade couldn't get in on time and was presumably wiped out dinosaur style on earth. with alt future dave's year-worth of knowledge, gear, loot, and experience, he rescinded his player status and "realness" as a human person to be a game guide for his naive past self right before the timeline split in order for himself and his friends to continue existing.

that would mess anyone up mentally. it's no wonder he's jaded, no pun intended. he's depressed as shit and bitter and probably has trauma issues unrelated to his bro, though they do compound on it. yes they both experienced bro's abuse but i'm talking about the differences between alpha timeline dave and davesprite; right now im not going to talk about things that are the same about them prior to the timeline split because it applies to them both so it's redundant.

essentially what's setting them apart is their experiences playing sburb, their chronological age (alt future dave/davesprite had been making timeloops over a span of four months and he says that in total the time from his chronological perspective is close to a YEAR in sburb grinding shit out before he goes back), their relationship to their friends and how their friends see them and how they see themselves, their ontological natures as beings, what their purposes are.

davesprite had his ontological status as a person and purpose changed. he assumed he'd be the one playing and doing important main shit in the alpha timeline with all his friends but then it turns out that wasn't the case due to the events that went down in his timeline. and becoming a sprite solidly changed his degree of existence. davesprite's best friend john asking if he can talk to "the real dave" is when i think he realized just how fucked up his existence as a person has become despite him doing pretty much everything for everyone for nearly a YEAR before the alpha timeline was even able to get properly started. if davesprite didn’t exist, nobody would have (john needed to live to do ectobiology). davesprite knew this and weaponized it against john who john treated as a secondary, lesser dave. so of course he’s kind of an asshole. it’s like his efforts and sacrifices meant squat to the people he considered his best friends because they didn’t experience it. to john he just suddenly appeared from the future and became a sprite.

this is heavy shit for davesprite that alpha timeline dave does NOT have to go through and it did change him in ways that cannot be said about alpha timeline dave. this is not a universal dave experience. so while it’s true that dave has the capacity of act like davesprite under those exact circumstances, alpha timeline dave didn’t undergo those that led to davesprite’s more miserable traits. therefore i don’t think it’s fair to conflate jade’s failed relationship with davesprite in particular as informing of how most of jade and dave’s relationships would unfold, because davesprite has been in exceptionally tragic circumstances, coming to terms with the state of his own existence. the last thing davesprite needs is romance. alpha timeline dave does not carry this burden.

Everyone believed that what was creating the dissonance wasn’t a central part to Dave’s character but an aftereffect of Bird Syndrome. Which you can’t blame them for because there’s nothing that would lead them to think differently. Every character besides Dirk is completely in the dark about Bro’s abuse and Dave stated he’d probably never tell any of the Betas. Which is fine, no one’s owed to know somebody’s baggage. But when you don’t give people a means to understand what you’re going through, especially when it leads you to hurt them, its only inevitable everyone’s going to be confused and going to come to conclusions using what they do know.

rebuttal to this: as i said earlier i don’t buy the whole bird issues thing and i get the handwaviness about being fused with a bird being john’s explanation for davesprite’s bullshittery. however i think it’s important to mention that john and jade both question if becoming a sprite might have had something to do with his change.

being fused with a bird never bothered him, as jade says. it was all the other baggage that came with the prototyping.

this includes playing the game for way longer than anyone else and mindlessly grinding from the ground up for about a year, then turning himself into a game construct and having his ontological level of existence as the platonic ideal form of dave strider lowered in the eyes of his friends.

JOHN: like what? JADE: its hard to explain JADE: just some slight differences in personality i guess JOHN: he still raps sometimes. JADE: yes... JADE: so? JOHN: i just thought i would mention that. JADE: ok i will admit i cant really tell if his rapping style has changed JOHN: trust me, it hasn't. JADE: i dont know if the differences are because he is a sprite JADE: or because he lived for a while in a different timeline... (p.4733)

JOHN: why is he such a basket case? he's like regular dave, but like, aloof enigma edition. JOHN: maybe it's because he's part bird? i think becoming a bird and a sprite did something weird to him. JADE: i dont think being a bird ever bothered him JADE: like i said... its all more complicated than that JOHN: normal dave was so much more level headed. JOHN: i have to admit, i spend a lot of time wondering what he and rose are up to. JADE: me too JOHN: ehh... JOHN: maybe it's for the best he broke up with you. JADE: why? JOHN: well, what kind of future do you think you would have with him? JOHN: he's a sprite. like really, what even is a sprite? how long do they live? will he still be around if we win the new game we are allegedly trying to get to? JADE: i dont know (p.5294)

as for the bro abuse thing, i can’t tell if floral’s position here is that davesprite is fucked up and had a failed relationship with jade because of bro’s abuse, and that dave would also necessarily have failed relationships with jade because he had the same experiences and also doesn’t tell anybody? the wording there is kind of vague and can be interpreted in different ways but that’s how i interpreted it.

they are right that bro’s abuse is something dave keeps to himself. but remember that dave has also deluded himself about it to cope. he doesn’t know what to think of it himself. both alpha timeline dave and davesprite have this baggage, but we explore it more with alpha timeline dave.

i know dave said in the post-retcon timeline when having a conversation with dirk that he could never tell karkat all of this or any of the betas about his abuse. but i still find this pesterlog interesting and i want to put a spotlight on it. even while dave was still chugging that copium, jade was the person he was closest to opening up about the nature of his relationship to his bro at this point. remember this is quite early on in the comic and he didn’t have 3 years on the meteor to contemplate it yet when he said this to her, his bro had just died at this point

GG: anyway dave im really sorry about your bro/dad GG: you were pretty close with him right? TG: meh it was a pretty bizarre relationship by any standard TG: fightin off wave after wave of face pumicing puppet ass every day TG: always being on guard for stealth attacks in the middle of the night while getting up to go to the fucking bathroom GG: heheh TG: but i guess it all sorta amounted to some vague unspoken semblance of kinship TG: if thats a thing TG: like if honor among thieves is something then lets call it camaraderie among ironic rapping roof ninjas TG: but thanks GG: sure TG: i thought about taking his sword TG: when i was there TG: but i couldnt TG: couldnt really bring myself to try to pull it out it was too weird GG: dave we have to stop him!!!!! TG: what GG: jack! GG: he shouldnt get away with this TG: you think (p.3204)

even if he’s in denial about it, deciding to point out the positivity he can rationalize about it to avoid spending too much time thinking deeply about it (it makes him uncomfortable), he’s getting closer to acknowledging the truth here that shit wasn’t normal, about it being “bizarre” and you can tell hes being genuine here when he thanks jade for her concern about his loss

dave then continues talking about his thoughts/feelings on the situation after jade says “sure”, as if he took her concern as an invite to open up about his thoughts even when it’s something vulnerable for him that he tried putting on false bravado in front of terezi about. jade then abruptly changes topic to what’s to be practically done about these tragedies—dave was still on the topic of his bro and she changed the topic to jack noir without clarifying, hence he goes “what”

this is interesting because terezi tried to get something out of him about this and was met by riddly puzzlecock and false bravado but he’s pretty straight up about his current feelings with jade. basically it really depends on the person dave is talking to.

in this specific argument, floral approaches grimbark jade solely from the position of her being uninhibited which is true in many ways, but grimbark jade is also quite nefarious and not in her right mind. i think that even if jade were unihibited and spoke her mind, she wouldn’t have it in her push the mayor into lava to get dave to fight her. thats the evil. floral does acknowledge this in a separate post though, but it’s not really touched on in her argument im discussing. i also want to reiterate that even though it might seem like im violently ripping this post limb from limb its really just something to bounce my pre-existing thoughts off of. this is all written with civility towards and respect for floral

even roxy says something about this—that the schtick doesnt suit her. like it doesnt feel like something she’d have the natural capacity to really be without some external influence

ROXY: so alt grannydaughter english ROXY: whyre u part dog + evil lookin JADE: DO NOT CALL ME THAT!!! ROXY: what JADE: my surname is harley not english JADE: but you may refer to me as jade, or ma'am if you are feeling especially nervous and deferential JADE: which as it turns out is the way you should be feeling about me, ALWAYS >:B ROXY: LOL!!! JADE: lol WHAT ROXY: jade i am in no way buying that ur normally this pompous and tyrannical ROXY: the shtick rly doesnt suit you its so obvious (p.6291)

so i don’t think everything jade says here should be taken to heart about her real feelings or how she would express them if she was being genuine as her normal self. we know jade can get mad but i think we’re giving her evil possession a little too much credit

that’s why i was personally disappointed in grimbark jade when homestuck was ongoing, is it felt like it didnt really give us anything? it was like empty calories while just waiting for the regular jade to come back which she never did. it is interesting to look at in retrospect to see if there’s anything there but…grimbark jade isn't exactly a reliable narrator. i guess none of them are but like, especially not grimbark jade. if i can’t separate what’s genuinely jade under this mess from what isn’t then what’s the point?

like for example this was left out of floral’s argument when showing this part, but in the comic grimbark jade tells dave that he’s “more messed up inside than davesprite” ��. right after dave wouldnt comply with her demands to fight her and doesnt want to fight lord english. that’s…not really telling about anything at all for either of them. jade is evil and if things dont go the way she’s programmed to get them to go she’s gonna flip her lid. this is what i mean about her not being in her right mind

JADE: the fact is youre going to have to rely on those powers if you want to stand any chance against a lord of time JADE: it is safe to expect he can only be challenged by someone with a similar command over the aspect DAVE: why is that safe to expect DAVE: where are all these presumptions coming from DAVE: if you can use swords why dont you take the welsh cueball sword and fight him yourself DAVE: i bet you could fuck him up DAVE: youre probably even more extra strong now that youve succumbed to the bark side DAVE: did you ever think about that JADE: dave i am perfectly aware of the awesome powers granted to me by the bark side JADE: it does not matter JADE: i cant be the one to wield your sword against english JADE: it has to be you JADE: it is the will of the empress, and thats final DAVE: the empress can suck it DAVE: i have no intention of fighting him DAVE: and this isnt even me pulling more lame self aware reluctant hero junk DAVE: i am just straight up not going to do it DAVE: see thats not reluctance its just petulant refusal on my part DAVE: reluctant hero shit is when the guys like aw shucks i dunno if i wanna but deep down we all know he really does DAVE: but i really dont DAVE: why should i DAVE: i dont give a damn about lord english or his nebulous atrocities out in nowherespace DAVE: what kind of villain is someone you never met who hardly did anything evil to you or your friends directly DAVE: or even to anyone in your universe for that matter other than through some vague insidious influence DAVE: who even is this guy and why should i hate him DAVE: am i really supposed to be pissed off at a green muscle monster i never met DAVE: cause i aint pissed off at no muscle monster DAVE: hell wasnt he in some ass backwards way responsible for us existing in the first place? DAVE: or all of humanity for that matter?? DAVE: maybe i should thank him before chopping him up via welshscalibur JADE: jeez you sure have some issues JADE: honestly it has become very tiresome listening to this sort of thing JADE: i thought davesprite had problems JADE: his issues i could kind of understand JADE: i thought you might be different, being the alpha dave and all JADE: but no JADE: you might be even more messed up inside than he was! DAVE: what DAVE: why are you dragging that guy into this (p.6385 / 6386)

part 2

[pynkhues]

Hiya Sophie :) I’ll start by saying that I know that this can be a bit of a sensitive topic for some people, so I hope this doesn’t come off as bait, because that’s not my intention at all.

I’d love to know what it is about Lestat bottoming and Louis topping that appeals to you? Is it your interpretation of show canon? Book canon? A mix of the two? Or is it just for fun and not particularly dependent on canon at all? The reason I ask is that I’m personally more into bottom Louis/top Lestat because - to me - that’s moreso what is implied regarding their dynamic in (show) canon. But! I’m trying to keep an open mind, and I always enjoy reading your takes so would love to hear from someone on the other side of the table so to speak. I think that sometimes we can get a little caught up in our own fandom echo chambers, and because of that it’s nice to poke our heads out every once in a while to see if our opinions can be changed and perspective can be expanded.

Apologies in advance if you’ve already answered something similar to this! And if you aren’t comfortable answering that’s completely fine. ❤️

Hi! And don't apologise, anon, it's totally fine.

Mm, I've been pretty open on here with thinking that they're vers and while I have tended to write Louis topping and Lestat bottoming in the fics I've posted so far, I've also referenced them having sex the other way around in both Steady Murmur and Ungodly Hour. The whole appeal of them to me is that their dynamic is one of push and pull, and I think that has always extended to their sexual dynamic, which is something the show depicted throughout the first season. Their roles shift in relation to what the other wants or needs in the moment of it, and I appreciate that you might not read the show's depiction that way, but to me, it's there.

I also think that for Louis, sex and power are entwined in a way that they're not for Lestat (or at least, not in the same way), which is something that I just find interesting to think about and explore. I think that extends to him as a pimp utilising other people's bodies and sexuality as a means of upward mobility, to him as a John to Lily's sex worker, to having a sexual relationship with Jonah when he was a minor (which I talked about more here), to fucking Lestat in his mistresses bed after Lestat dropped him, to his canonical dom relationship with Armand. That's interesting to me, particularly in a relationship with a character like Lestat who's physically more powerful, and I think is a really understated and underacknowledged part of his character in the fandom.

Like, I don't think he just woke up and knew how to dom Armand for instance, especially not in 1940s Paris, and especially not after 20-30 odd years as a pimp.

I also don't see Louis as particularly feminine at all, and the amount of fanworks that feature bottom!Louis as highly feminised just frankly - personally - isn't something I see as in character or as appealing. I do agree with many that to an extent Louis performs masculinity, particularly in the Rue Royale era, but I see that performance as an amplification of a part of himself, not an invention of something that he's not.

With Lestat, I think he's so hungry to be held in any and all capacities. He wants to be loved, he wants to be wanted, yet he entangles himself romantically with people who are withholding, who can't or won't give him all of themselves. There's this kind of gaping hole in him in that sense, but in another, Lestat's an enormously powerful creature who both hides his own power from others, and regularly exploits it. I think he's afraid to an extent of that level of power in himself, and I think submission sometimes - not all the time - helps him to both feel loved and wanted and in control of himself.

I also think in that sense a part of Louis' attraction to Lestat does come from that affiliation with power, but it's not one he wants used on him, but rather one he wants used for him, which we see a little bit in that Rue Royale era, particularly with the card game and with Lestat cashflowing The Azaelia. (In a lot of ways that comes to that transactional element that Daniel Hart talks about, but that's neither here nor there for this post). There's also that element of dominating someone you know is more powerful / getting someone who's hurt you to submit to you that's definitely there in at the very least the 1.06 scene at Antoinette's, and I'd argue with Dreamstat too.

This is getting a bit rambly, haha, but look, again, I think they're vers, I think they both want the other in their entirety, and I think sometimes that means giving and taking for both of them. I probably write Lestat bottoming more because I tend to write what I can't really find to read, but also, y'know - - there's a degree of personal appeal, and the fact that I just think its neat, haha. I don't always think its all that deep.

[theflyindutchwoman]

Given recent discussions in the fandom and because I’m curious to hear others’ opinion… would you want to see a Chenford breakup next season?

All right, let me start with my usual disclaimer : this is only my opinion and it has no more (or less) value than anyone else's. And this isn't meant as a personal attack either, regardless of which side of the equation you're in. I actually enjoyed reading other people's takes on this, particularly the ones who want a breakup, to see their perspective on the subject. It was truly interesting (no sarcasm).

To answer your question, dear Anon, no, I don't want a breakup. Mainly because I feel that so many shows go there, so I'm more interested in seeing Tim and Lucy navigate the ups and downs together.

One thing that attracted me to their relationship was their ability to talk to each other about everything and anything. How, despite their differences and their rocky start, they could always confide in each other… Be extremely vulnerable. And that is what I would love to see going forward. How this shorthand they've developed by working together can translate into their personal relationship. Don't get me wrong, just because they are usually good at communicating doesn't mean that it is perfect. It's not. Even before they became a couple. There are some cracks that became more and more visible as the season progressed. The theme of 'honesty' was their main thread in 5b. The storylines involving Sava & Jake or Isabel served to highlight that aspect. To emphasise how lies, deceit and miscommunication can destroy a relationship. Now it could be used as a foreshadowing… Or it could be used as a warning. Tim and Lucy already have a much stronger relationship, so I choose to believe that this could be a learning experience for them. Learn from other people's mistakes, learn from your past (in Tim's case).

Right now, those moments of dishonesty revolves around one common theme : work. Tim taking a desk job without consulting Lucy first… Lucy doing the five-player trade behind his back… Him trying to lie at first that he wasn't bored out of his mind… Her not saying anything about Primm (as far as we know)… Him not wanting to open up about his fears regarding undercover…  Those are starting to pile up and they're going to need to address it. The sooner, the better. Particularly the undercover talk. This has been a long time coming. It's clear that Tim is terrified but doesn't want to burden Lucy with this. And she can sense it. That last scene in 5.21 was (for me) a step in the right direction where they started voicing their concerns. It's nowhere near sufficient. But they stopped avoiding that topic altogether. Like I said, they can be great at communicating… But they can also be their own worst enemies. They're both selfless when it comes to the other… they're both used to do things a certain way. And now, they need to learn how to do these things together. To talk about these moments that may seem insignificant to them but isn't to the other. To stop making decisions for the other. This is quite new to them : as we've seen in the past, they didn't truly open up to their boyfriends/girlfriends. That's something they are going to have to learn together. And that's okay : this is part of the journey of being in a relationship.

Another reason why I don't want to see that is related to the characters' growth. The thing is, I actually could picture Tim breaking up with Lucy because there is a pattern here. If he got it into his head that he is holding Lucy back, an idea already planted by Noah in 5.16, then yes, it wouldn't be out of character for him to break up, thinking it's the right thing to do for Lucy. Which is not that dissimilar to what he did in 5.02 : sure, they weren't together, but it still felt like a separation. Especially since the end of that scene mirrored so well another one from 1.12… when he decided to divorce Isabel. And if you remember, that was pretty much for that very same reason : he was afraid that being with him would only remind her of her time as an addict and bring her down. So he did what he thought would help her the most and decided to divorce her. So breaking that pattern would be a tremendous character development for Tim (in my opinion). Then, there's the fact that this is something they knew would be coming up at some point. This isn't a new obstacle. The episode before they got together had Lucy go undercover. And Tim, even more so than her, knew what he was getting into when he told her that it was worth the risk. He may not have explicitly said it but the implication that she was worth fighting for was right there. So breaking up for something that they could foresee kind of negates those words. And it would play right into Lucy's insecurities. She was so hesitant because she didn't want to lose what they have. She is finally letting go of the fears that prevented her before from fully committing to a relationship… Her certainty in them is absolutely amazing. So breaking up now would hurt her so much. (I focused mostly on Tim here because I struggle to see a reason for Lucy to break up. At least, not if this is related to her career, be it undercover work or her promotion).

Now, that's not to say that it can't be executed in a beautiful way. Sometimes breaking up can help strengthen a relationship, as odd as it might seem. Sometimes it gets too much and taking a step back can offer a new perspective and a fresh start on healthier grounds. Just like sticking in a relationship at all costs can be very damaging and toxic. I mean, take a look at Lucy and Tim in their last respective relationships… They stayed well past the expiration date. But I, personally, would rather see them work this out together. See them 'fight' and argue, like they've done in the past… that very same thing they didn't do with Ashley and Chris. See them all vulnerable with each other, like they've also done in the past. I honestly think the writers could pull off the angst and drama with this storyline, without having to resort to a breakup. But again, that's only my preference :)

[amuseoffyre]

Mulling on the way Stede and Ed have both learned to talk around their desires and wishes, whether as a defence mechanism or because past experience has made them cautious about expressing themselves. This has led them to have very different ways of saying what they need in very carefully constructed way and sometimes, missing what the other is saying entirely.

Since it got long, I'll show mercy :)

I've written before about the way Stede leans into the passive voice in season one. He doesn't directly express an opinion, coming at it from the side so he can't be blamed if it's a bad suggestion.

A prime example is when he tries to dissuade Ed from going to the party by describing how bad it'll be (from his perspective) or when Ed's considering leaving and instead of asking him to stay, he says Ed doesn't need to rush off and "we're all enjoying your company".

Based on his past experience, it's no small wonder, when his every suggestion to his father was shot down with scorn and disdain. His likes and interests were mocked relentlessly and constantly criticised. Even Mary shouted at him about the ship which - he thought - was his idea of the best future for him with his family. For him, expressing how he's feeling is something that can be weaponised against him.

He not only hides his feelings, but when he's feeling especially bad, he hides himself as well. He leaves situations when he's distressed or unhappy: leaving his family, hiding in his cabin in 1x01, retreating in the party in 1x05, going back to the ship in 1x08, returning home in 1x09.

The one time he does express himself verbally to Ed, before the academy, he's mid-retreat to the ship. He's angry and upset and insulted by Calico Jack and is taking himself elsewhere, but Ed stops him and says he should stay.

And this is where I chew on their communication mismatches, because Stede has been sitting and sitting and sitting all day, all the negative stuff building, stoked by Jack's cheerfully applied passive aggression and manipulation. He's been smiling through it for Ed's sake and when he loses his temper, he falls into the same pattern of not being direct. He doesn't point the finger at Jack for his behaviour, which has been the trigger the whole time. He tells Ed "I don't like who you are around this guy", his focus being 'this guy' who has caused this change in Ed's behaviour.

But Ed hears it as something being wrong with him specifically. He doesn't hear that it's Jack's influence of behaviour. His own self-esteem is so brittle, he immediately takes this as being fully his fault and when he's given the choice to stay with Stede or go with Jack, he leaves and says "You were always going to see what I am."

This not only cements Stede's conviction that saying what he thinks aloud will get a negative response (in this case, Ed leaving), but also solidifies the fact that Ed is fully convinced that Stede would eventually come to dislike him as much as Ed dislikes himself. Neither of them said what the other thinks they said, but because it's informed by their own trauma and issues, they radically misinterpret the other's meaning.

Like Stede, Ed edges around directness as much as he possibly can. Given what we've seen of the people from his past, it's clear that honesty and earnestness are subject to mockery at best and, at worst, the thing he cares about will be taken away from him.

Instead, to avoid the risk of that, he tends to drop hints, make roundabout suggestions, uses metaphors and allegories, and tries to nudge people to understanding what he means/wants.

He doesn't want to leave but doesn't know if he's welcome to stay, so he just makes noises that he's thinking about moving on so an invitation will be extended. He doesn't care about the invitation to the party, but maybe, pfft, not like he's bothered, but they could go. Whatever.

If it does get to a point where he's upset he - like Stede - will try to remove himself from a situation and hide away. It happens in 1x06 during the fuckery, 1x10 inside the pillow fort, 2x04 at Mary and Anne's.

It's very telling that the times he does let his guard down a bit, it's when someone goes after him. He and Stede have their most direct conversations when Ed is hiding under a yellow blanket, even if Stede is still bemused by the 'doggy heaven' metaphor.

A lot of the time they're both like ships passing in the night when it comes to communicating because they're both trying so hard not to show too much vulnerability. It's there on the beach at the naval academy when Stede tries to deflect Ed from China by pointing out "it's quite far". It's there in Ed's fishing metaphor which has so many layers and Stede has no idea wtf is going on because he has none of the context.

Stede has learned to be more direct in S2, so much more so that he actually expresses his feelings and emotions aloud for the first time. He talks about it with Lucius, Zheng and Anne, even before he and Ed have their breakthrough in 1x04 when, at Anne and Mary's, Stede frankly and directly explains himself to Ed and it helps them get back on an even keel.

Ed isn't quite there yet, though, and this is why the fall out in 1x07 comes out of nowhere for Stede because he's missing a lot of the information that Ed has threaded into the metaphor.

He knows Ed doesn't want to be a pirate, but the subtext all through the fisherman conversation is like they're having two different conversations. Stede is being so much more direct by pointing out that Ed is panicking and offering options, but Ed is deflecting as a defence again.

What's lovely is that by the final scene, they're sort of getting to the same page. Awkwardly, tripping each other up a bit on the way, but they're getting there, realising there's a lot more to each other than they had understood before. The entire exchange has so much layered into it.

Stede: so we're innkeepers now? Ed: I thought we could give it a go. Unless you're having second thoughts. Stede: I'm not. Ed: It's a bit of a shithole. Stede: It's a fixer-upper. Good bones.

On one hand, it's about the building and oh the symbolism of him wanting to make a place where people choose to stay with him is aaaaaa.

On the other hand, it's both about Ed himself and their relationship. Ed couching his meaning in metaphors again and this time, Stede picks up the meaning, even if he doesn't fully get all the nuances of it. (also teehehehe 'good bones'. I bet there are)

They're working their way towards better communication, a little bit at a time. They've both had their lowest ebb, run in panic, and learned from it. There's still a lot of trauma and defence mechanisms to unpick, but they're getting there.

Now if Stede could stop bottling up his trauma and hiding them in his wine-cellar of the things, that'd be great.

[nekropsii]

I just wanna say i love your analyses. im not even into homestuck that much and really only pay attention to like 2 characters and the classpect system, but your analyses on the characters and the story are always so interesting to read, and its nice to see someone who is just. so aware of it, especially of the more problematic aspects of homestuck (like its antiblackness, ableism, and the infantilizing of characters like mituna and kankri within the fandom). as a blk person its refreshing to see someone acknowledge it because most of the time i feel like these things are so swept under the rug, especially by other nonblack fans...

besides that, id like to ask. what are your thoughts on sylphs as a class and how sylphs who are doom, void, timebounnd (you know, aspects that are normally seen as "negative") interact with their aspect? i feel like out of any class, they're the ones that are difficult for me to understand. id just like to hear your thoughts!

Aww, thank you so much! This is an absolute DELIGHT to hear. I'm glad my work has held so much value to you!! It really does mean a lot. Glad I'm doing something right in your eyes. :)

Homestuck has been a deep passion of mine for years now, and I find that it's physically impossible to earnestly and completely tackle it without directly confronting the layers of bigotry that Hussie was operating under while writing the comic. The comic is so overtly caked in it that it affects even the most basic meta of it all- foundational parts of the story are infested with it like termites. Classpecting is an example. Even the magic system isn't free of it! I don't see very many people bring that up, but then again, I don't see very many people bring up literally any of the Anti-Blackness in the comic, like... Period. It fucking sucks. But that's what I'm here for, in part. If no one else will do it, then I will- and gladly so, because it really ought to be discussed more.

And, to answer your question about Sylphs of Doom, Void, and Time...

Sylphs either Mend or Create, depending on circumstance. They largely intend to maintain stability of their Aspect within themselves and their session, and are eager to speak about their own perspective + experience with their Aspect, should you let them do so. The presence of a Sylph tends to imply an excess of their Opposite Aspect.

Doom is, largely, the Aspect of Rules, Restriction, and Sacrifice. The job of a Sylph of Doom is to keep these things in check- Mending where it's needed, or Creating where it's needed. To use Sovereignstuck as an example, a Sylph of Doom could take on the role of a Game Patcher/Moderator, making sure the active session follows whatever set rules were given... Perhaps a little too strictly. Void is, largely, the Aspect of Obscurity, Nothingness, and Oblivion. Mending these may require active deceit... Though that's not necessarily a bad thing. An excess of Light is a frightening thing indeed- though largely seen as a positive Aspect, Light is about Chaos and Uncontrollability, and even the slightest amount of unchecked excess of it can snowball and tank a session. Time is, largely, the Aspect of Entropy, Fate, and... Well, Literal Time. The job of a Sylph of Time tends to imply the stabilization and restoration of Timelines. They maintain linearity- keeping the threads of Fate from getting tangled into a terrible mess. Not to bring up Sovereignstuck again, but we also have a Sylph of Time, and she aids greatly in keeping the timeline- and therefore the narrative- straightforward. A Sylph of Time would prevent the story from becoming as much of a tangled mess as Homestuck proper is... Dave was never good at keeping things clean.

I hope these explanations were adequate! Feel free to ask for any clarification you need, thank you for valuing my opinion, and I hope you have a lovely day!

[queenrei]

Let me start by saying, this is a Libra STAN account 🗣...I've always identified as a Scorpio (Tropical) sun, but ever since I finding out i'm actually a Libra (Sidereal) sun, I've been diving deep into learning more about Libra energy. I've always had a little interest in it, being that I was born on Scorpio-Libra cusp.

Scorpios may have a bad rep for their darkness, vengefulness, and secretive nature, but it turns out that Libras have it even worse 🙃 From the term "lying ass libra" to being labeled as shallow, fake, and two-faced, Libra's reputation is not great. Honestly, I get it and understand. I've definitely been guilty of all the stereotypes, and I've been actively working on correcting them as I grow/evolve. But I can't help but get frustrated by people's narrow-minded views (and that goes for all pop-astrology btw) to think that all people of one sign all behave the same way is nonsense...The sun is in it's detriment in the sign and as a Libra sun, throughout my life, I've felt a constant struggle between my true self and the expectations of surroundings. It's not about being fake or two-faced, but rather, I've come to realize that I possess a chameleon-like ability to adapt to any environment. I actually really appreciate this trait as it has allowed me to explore various experiences and meet new people due to my open-mindedness.

When it comes to being shallow or a people pleaser, it's actually deeper than it seems. Personally, I consider myself an empath, cliché as it may sound. Putting myself in someone else's shoes is my natural instinct. So even if someone annoys or upsets me, I can put on a nice face and keep the peace. Why? Well, first of all, I don't like upsetting people. But it's also a peace thing for me. Trust me, it's not just about being shallow or wanting to please others. It's about empathy and finding harmony. It's exhausting argue and go back-and-forths with people Sometimes, it's just easier to handle things with kindness. I know it's not the best approach, and it is one of my toxic traits. Not caring about people's opinion is a challenge, but I'm improving over time. I admire those who speak up for themselves, even if it leads to conflict. I'll get there. However, I also value my peace, so I'll always choose my battles wisely. One thing I've stopped doing is talking shit behind people's back after playing nice. It's not something I'm proud of.

Another point to make, and it might upset some people, but whatever. We have this reputation for playing both sides of the fence, which makes people think we're disloyal and fake. But the truth is, we can see things from all sides and look past the surface. Sometimes people will vent to me, but they get annoyed when I try to understand the other person's perspective or point out their own misconceptions. Then, will try justifying their delusions or getting mad at me for not taking their side. I'm done with it now. As adults, it's crucial to empathize with others before shaming/invalidating them. I'm all about playing devil's advocate, especially if it helps someone confront a harsh truth they need to hear. I used to bite my tongue, but now I couldn't care less. Especially when it comes to people close to me, honesty is key. No need to sugar coat things just to make yourself feel better. And I hope they'd do the same for me. That's what keeping the balance is really all about, in my opinion.

Ok my last & final thought is Libras are definitely not as shallow as some people think. I mean, seriously, have you ever actually tried to have a deep conversation with a one? When it comes to delving into the depths of our minds, it requires a certain level of comfort and trust. And trust me, my mind is always spinning, and it can get pretty damn dark. I thrive on deep conversations and can go for hours about a topic. I have a few people that I go there with, and even then I usually wait for that opening or invitation to go deep, and then it's off to the ocean floor we go. It's all about the vibe I get from the person. So, don't underestimate Libras, because there's more depth than you think.

Wow, i wasnt expecting to go in like that for my first post lol. This was in no way a sympathy call for Libras, but its been on my mind and i felt the need to let it out. I love all astrology takes so feel free to express your feelings/thoughts.

[thepunkmuppet]

so i have been writing my ideal version of season 14 in my head laying awake at night for weeks now and someone else needs to hear about it before i go insane. so.

concepts that would make miss ruby sunday ✨interesting and spicy✨ without going against the evidence we already have:

she is from the near future (2046 possibly?? i heard that year floating around in relation to robert ap gwillam)

she is from the further future, potentially WAY further, but was sent back in time by weeping angels hence her seemingly modern clothing. also this makes way for a weeping angels episode. you’re welcome.

she either has splinters like clara or there is a spatial genetic multiplicity thing going on (like with gwen cooper and gwyneth), and she exists in multiple time periods (eg, 60s and regency like we have seen in promo photos)

she is some kind of creation of jinkx monsoon’s character or “the duchess”. we don’t know anything about these characters but they are described as “the doctors most powerful enemy yet” and “beware the duchess”. i think creating a companion would be a pretty cool thing for a villain to do (and would probably end in utter tragedy, in the interest of fucking the doctor up, which is always fun)

she is a zygon, other alien or even a time lord who thinks she is human living on earth. i have thought about this and it’s my absolute favourite. there is potential for a queer / outsider allegory which is always great (i don’t belong here, i feel like i’m hiding, etc). she can still be from the modern era, but would have a unique perspective and presence on the show due to actually not being from earth. if a zygon, she would be able to shapeshift, a helpful and never-before-seen skill to have on adventures with loads of fun possibilities. and it would just make the whoniverse feel interconnected, not just retconning important world events with “time can be rewritten” but actually acknowledging that yeah, there are zygons living on earth! remember that? now that ive thought about it, i really want this option…

she is actually from the 1960s or the regency era, and we are seeing it out of sync and/or assuming based on promo stuff that her modern clothing is her everyday clothing and the historical stuff is just for funsies. i would love a 60s companion because a character from the time of the shows creation next to a black doctor?? what a fucking boss move it would be so awesome

she is mia tyler. im adding this because it’s popular, but people are really grasping at straws here in my opinion and i just… don’t like this idea? if mia tyler ever appears i want them to make it damn well clear, at least with foreshadowing and stuff. i’m going into season 14 wanting new and fresh and original. not supernatural nostalgia-bait soap opera shit. “I’M YOUR DAUGHTER FROM ANOTHER UNIVERSE” gimme a break i don’t like this one

she’s a unit or torchwood agent. this could actually be real! i like this one it’s fun, we know there’s gonna be a unit episode including kate stewart, why not have her be involved? love me a badass spy lady, plus it could open up martha jones and spin-off opportunities so….

she’s a secret villain. very broad and vague i know, but it’s never happened before and the shock horror twist of it all would just be so awesome, especially because millie has a background in soap operas lmao

her timeline is funky in some way. maybe she’s like river song, maybe she’s like clara, maybe she’s stuck in a time loop or is from an alternate universe or there’s something very wrong about the events of her life that means timey wimey stuff ensues

she’s a time lord / gallifreyan and possibly a relative of the doctor. possibly linked to susan in some way, or an otherwise relative of the doctor’s. a secret sibling (again, millie gibson’s soap opera background!!), his child / susan’s parent, someone linked to the doctors daughter jenny, etc etc

she’s a time agent. the idea of time agents is really cool but woefully unexplored, we only ever meet jack and john and sure you can’t beat the wives but i want to see the full potential of them, there’s so much you could do

if you can think of any more, please do share in tags and comments i wanna know other ways i can get my hopes up way too high!! :))

[ancientgoddessofegypt]

I’m so interested to learn your opinion on Pluto in Scorpio in the 12th house? If you don’t mind explaining what you know about it. I honestly suck at astrology 😭 even though I’ve learned a lot about it. But I love hearing other peoples perspectives. i feel like I trigger people just by walking into a room and I don’t understand why. And is it solely due to having the 12th house in Scorpio?

Pluto in the 12th house is a masterful placement to me. Its like when deep oceans figures out its also space itself. There is a universe inside of your mind that shows you the riches of all things impossible and possible. Secret realms hidden in your mind waiting for its escape, for better or for worse. You can control the psychic abilities that come out, however at some point you should allow them to go full swing as your gifts are trying to show you something. Seer abilities are powerful here, and I could see being an oracle/decoder with this placement. You could have insight into other peoples past, present and future. And although this can make you uncomfortable this could be something that can help them.

I got a vision of a girl from tiktok, who talked about how she was on a bus and something kept egging her to tell this boy to not go this particular street because he would die. She felt crazy but she ended up not telling him and ending up feeling back. My spirit is telling me your gift is similar to that, and you may have come across others who may have needed your guidance but because you didnt know them you passed by the chance to tell them. I know this can feel weird but one of your gifts is in helping others with choices, something about being at the crossroads and your like the deity of the cross roads that helps them figure it out.

Now back to my explanation lol. House of hidden enemies people could really hate the knowledge that comes out of you naturally. What takes them forever it takes you 20 minutes or none at all. Youre connected to the cosmos and sometimes you can see things you truly did not want to see, but its for you to know so you can get a better understanding of how this world works. Its not really black or white. Its just is what it is. Your psychic abilities can be strengthened through dreams, especially astral traveling. Messages from people you know and dont know could come to you, and for anyone you dont know you might meet them later.

I didn't explain it being in scorpio however when its in scorpio it becomes way more beneficial in the house. However scorpio is also intense so its always going to rear its ugly side of its darkness from time to time.

All in all, your personal power is tremendous in the house of the subconscious mind. This side of you goes through many transformations and you come out a different person every time. I feel like shadow work here is a very special thing because you can quickly get into the deep parts of your psyche and get the answers for whatever it is you seek, then go through a process of elimination. Theres so much to right here so ill just do a part two! really can go on all day about how the psyche goes through roller coasters on a day to day basis which can drive anyone crazy. Pluto in any house calls for every day challenges in order to rebirth so I know this placement can be a little difficult at times.

Something about lilith is coming up for you strongly... I didnt want to pass up on it so I have to ask... is it in the 12th house too? or is it somewhere else strongly I your chart?

[determinate-negation]

Ok so same person here. I totally get being uncomfortable about people knowing certain things about you and deleting it hence me staying on anon myself too lol. I was curious why it was gone so suddenly and wanted to know why you deleted/additional thoughts or whatever else bc it is a very interesting loaded thing. I didn’t really need to copy the whole post’s text bc like I said I don’t think what you were saying matches all of that obviously but just a couple certain sentiments. It was never that your assertion about the history of it was wrong, I think it was more the sort of enlightened slightly superior attitude about it all in critiquing the original “cringe uwu bdsm” post and afterwards. Not even that it’s anything I would necessarily say myself, but I think the level of harm/cringiness/negativity attached to it was kinda disproportionate and I think that’s mostly what reminded me of the other post I saw later on. To say you don’t pass judgement seems a bit removed from the rest of your argument. It seems like maybe there’s a slight projection going on about not getting something that other queer folks do get and feeling left out bc of that. Which is fair bc that is frustrating and difficult and it’s okay to not enjoy things and voice that. I think for me the biggest thing is that since puritanical values are so incredibly rampant if someone (especially someone of a historically oppressed group hence mentioning it before) feels love, respect, and tenderness in kink it’s pretty much always okay to leave that alone! Not to say it’s an inherently revolutionary act, but I just don’t think the amount of “cringe” (therefore shame/embarrassment) assigned to it was necessary. Is acknowledging the history and psychoanalysis of it all more important than whatever love suffering people feel? Because joy (in this matter and others) is hard to find and maintain coupled with such intensive psychoanalysis, history, etc. I feel like in leftist spheres we are often so obsessed with the type of language, arguments, and perspectives you use. And I worry because of it we don’t leave enough room for love and it’s active practice for ourselves and others. You sound very smart and I appreciate your perspective and I follow you for a reason because I am always interested in your commentary in posts so thanks for responding to my first hastily sent half baked msg lol mostly just wanted to hear/know more about ur opinion and why it disappeared

that post sucked, its so corny, i dont think im being disproportionally negative to make one post about something being annoying on my blog. but youre right there is something about “not getting something other queer folks get” because my experiences with my sexuality are completely different than what you described about respect and tenderness and so on. i am also from a “historically oppressed” group btw and i dont really get the significance of mentioning this repeatedly. if bdsm is something that serves that purpose for someone, thats cool, for many other people sadomasochism is more pathological and detrimental to their lives, and i dont think that manifestation is something totally separate from healthier practices. human sexuality is dark and complex when i talk about it i dont want to have to frame it in such positive terms that flatten out all its contradictions and complexity. again this is something relevant to my life so theres a reason why im in interested in a psychoanalytic approach to it. i could easily say theres something you dont get about an entire dimension to this. and why do people assume by talking about history youre making someone pass a moral judgement, saying the history is more important than the thing itself. im a marxist and i like history including the history of sexuality. i want to talk about it because i find it interesting and related to a lot of things ive studied and relevant to understanding human relations. thank you for messaging me back, i appreciate it & if you wanna talk more dm me.

[egg-emperor]

there is a ton of hypocrisy in most of the people that have been shitting on me actually so I shouldn't let it bother me. but it's just frustrating that some are allowed to go around preaching that they're accepting of darker concepts and love when Eggman is evil and fucked up but then bitch about me and say I'm a terrible person and monster, specifically write it all wrong, have all the wrong takes and opinions.

apparently I'm still too much and awful to them because what I believe and create is not 100% up to their personal tastes and agreement. apparently it means I made those choices to upset them in particular, like I'm not just my own person with my own thoughts, opinions, and imagination and create what I want without them crossing my mind at all before they insert themselves into it.

I'm glad I know how to accept and befriend people with different opinions and interests. people think I can't just because I'm still sure to share my own thoughts as I should be free to. sometimes I disagree with friends immensely but they're free to think what they want. I just come in and throw in my two cents when I feel like it when it comes to interpretation or correct something when it comes to actual facts because I want to help out.

I don't enjoy being in a hive mind where it feels like the rule is you're only allowed to be vocal if you're saying what everyone else wants and if you don't then you should just stfu and repress different ways you think and feel and get accused of bad intentions and punished if you don't. I've even had people get angry just because I hypothetically wouldn't like their fanfic I haven't even read. like what?

it's part of being human to both agree and disagree and hate and dislike things people around you say and believe and like or dislike, no matter how much you get along with them. obviously. so why pretend we always agree, never share our different opinions, and think hard about who's going to like and dislike our honest thoughts and feelings on a fictional character and have to keep it to ourselves if xyz isn't going to personally like it? it's exhausting.

we're all different and we should embrace that, instead of being made to feel forced to hide our feelings and repress ourselves to please others that are sensitive and intolerant towards different perspective, then try to project that and their insecurity in their own onto others. I'm not here to only say what everyone else wants to hear, I'm here to express myself and how I really feel and I should especially be free to on my own blog of all places.

if people like and agree with what I say and create, I really appreciate it and I'm glad it can be enjoyable/agreeable. but it's simply impossible for me to always be agreeable in every single circumstance, sometimes people may hate what I say and believe and create for this character but I'm just doing what I believe and I enjoy and I'm allowed just as much as anyone else. I just wish I wasn't punished and accused of maliciousness because of it.

[pangolinheart]

What things do you most want to see in someone's OC? Or what do you always find the most interesting? Or stimulating, if you're in that sort of mood?

Hmmmm this is a difficult question! There are a lot of things I like about other people's OCs, and it changes depending on the character. My tastes are really varied. I can't really say there's anything I want to see in people's OCs, because they're meant to be how the person who created them wanted them to be.

I guess the easy answer is that I like to see characters who feel like real people. Characters that have a healthy mix of strengths and flaws, and strengths that become flaws and vice versa. Characters who have opinions about the things happening around them that are based in experience or core personality traits. Characters that grow and change over the course of a game or story. But I think this is something everyone likes in characters.

When it comes to fan OCs, one thing that I really admire and find interesting is when they really add to the world's lore without totally breaking it. I'm always so impressed with peoples' ability to synthesize canon lore into something new and interesting - extrapolating from it, or filling in its gaps, or even just adding an element that seems to make the story more cohesive. It can be with in-universe cultures, or biologies, or societal norms, really anything. Oftentimes this is with a backstory, but not always. I think it's so cool and engaging and displays a lot of creativity while still being understandable to other fans.

Also in fan OCs, I love seeing their relationships with different canon characters, whether they're positive, negative, romantic, platonic, etc. I think that for an outside observer the way that characters interact with the npcs/canon characters can tell you a lot about the oc's personality, values, and personal tastes. It's also an interesting way to get a new perspective on a canon character. What makes another person's oc dislike a character that yours loves? What makes another oc go feral for a canon character that you're kind of "meh" on? Those sorts of things are really interesting to me. I also really love characters with symbolism. I'm no good at it myself, but I love when characters have some sort of image or theme that pervades their character - especially if it's represented visually, like in art. I don't know why, I've just always liked it. People who are good at symbolism are so smart and powerful.

Another thing that I think I have in common with many people is that I like to see good character design (though good can mean a lot of things.) It's great to see characters who are visually distinctive. Sometimes it's because they have a unique or unmistakable feature. Sometimes it's because they have a design that's cohesive and pulls together their hair/features/outfit/etc. Sometimes I don't know why and I just look at someone's OC and think "WOW that's WONDERFUL." The last one I'll add is that I really like to hear people's little headcanons about their OCs. Stuff that isn't necessary to their backstory or part of their larger story arc, and may never make it into a fic or art, but still makes them feel more real. What are their hobbies? What kind of food do they like? What's their pettiest pet peeve that drives them crazy? What's the most embarrassing thing they've done? What was their favorite subject in school? What's a weird talent they have that no one knows about? This is part of why I like reading people's responses to ask games - you get lots of little tidbits of information that you might not otherwise know, and it makes the characters feel more grounded and relatable.