#it did briefly

[mellomadness]

ughhh I woke up this morning with auditory overload and it’s only getting worse… I hate sensory overload days

[teaboot]

HELP I was at the sex shop w a platonic bestie and they asked me who the dude from the christian big boat myth was and I was so blown away that they couldnt remember that *I* couldn't remember and we just stood there surrounded by dildos listing off old bible guy names trying to figure it out like queer kids in a conservative boomer comic

[egophiliac]

finally got some time to finish these guys up! which is sort of ironic considering I started these because I wanted to draw Malleus with a Dragapult, and then I just didn't for a million years!

Malleus has the aforementioned Dragapult, except it's a super special non-canon color Dragapult (like an anime-only form that you could get in-game exclusively through some limited-time event where you have to show up in-person at a specific location in Japan) (it has some wacky overpowered exclusive move/form and the OT is listed as Malleus) (so like that kind of ridiculous specialness) (Leona is extremely salty about this). also hoards and hoards of Dreepy. Dreepy LOVE Malleus. they take naps on his horns inbetween begging him to throw them across the island at mach speeds.

Lilia has a Drampa and a bunch of Woobat that he hasn't actually caught, they just follow him around in swarms because they sense a kinship with him. (also breaking my own rule again to say that he had a Mawile in the past, because...I just really wanted to give him a Mawile...)

Sebek has Sandile for obvious reasons, and also a Pikachu that bullies him relentlessly. :(

Silver has a shiny Corvisquire; I really went back-and-forth on also giving him an Aegislash, but...hm. those pokedex entries though. he can stick with just one for now.

(I hadn't planned on the shiny for him, but after I'd decided on the Corvisquire line and was looking it up for reference, I realized that shiny Rookidee is gold and then turns silver when it evolves and I lost my entire goddamn mind)

[elodieunderglass]

Having dug out the Unfinished Tales to reference a conversation Tolkien wrote between Gandalf and Pippin (but didn’t publish) I thought I’d share it. Gandalf is talking to Pippin about the history of Thorin’s company, hobbits and why he chose Bilbo.

This is evidence for the grand statement I just made about how Bilbo was intended to be a catalyst that changed his society, and that hobbit society was indeed significantly different after his journey, with large social changes occurring between The Hobbit and Fellowship. But it’s also a very funny passage to me so here it is:

‘And then there was the Shire-folk. I began to have a warm place in my heart for them in the Long Winter, which none of you can remember.

They were very hard put to it then: one of the worst pinches they have been in, dying of cold, and starving in the dreadful dearth that followed. But that was the time to see their courage, and their pity one for another. It was by their pity as much as by their tough uncomplaining courage that they survived. I wanted them still to survive.

(😭😭😭😭. Also the theme of having pity for each other is what redeems both Bilbo and Frodo re: Gollum.)

But I saw that the Westlands were in for another very bad time again, sooner or later, though of quite a different sort: pitiless war.

(This is possibly one reason why this passage didn’t make it to publication - Gandalf shouldn’t have had this much foreknowledge of the upcoming war of the ring.)

To come through that I thought they would need something more than they now had. It is not easy to say what. Well, they would want to know a bit more, understand a bit clearer what it was all about, and where they stood.

(It’s also explaining that Bilbo’s role in Thorin’s company was predetermined both by a more omnipotent Gandalf and by Fate; that Gandalf selected Bilbo to be a social catalyst, to return and provoke hobbit society into a more adaptable, resilient state; therefore increasing their chances of surviving.)

They had begun to forget: forget their own beginnings and legends, forget what little they had known about the greatness of the world. It was not yet gone, but it was getting buried: the memory of the high and the perilous. But you cannot teach that sort of thing to a whole people quickly. There was not time.

(Thus Bilbo was supposed to be changed, and return changed by his journey, to teach his people.)

And anyway you must begin at some point, with some one person. I dare say he was “chosen” and I was only chosen to choose him; but I picked out Bilbo.’

‘Now that is just what I want to know,’ said Peregrin. ‘Why did you do that?’

‘How would you select any one Hobbit for such a purpose?’ said Gandalf. ‘I had not time to sort them all out;

(He is SO funny)

but I knew the Shire very well by that time, although when I met Thorin I had been away for more than twenty years on less pleasant business. So naturally thinking over the Hobbits that I knew, I said to myself: “I want a dash of the Took” (but not too much, Master Peregrin)

(This is brilliant we are always BODYING pippin constantly. NOT TOO MUCH TOOK 👀. We were ROBBED not having this in canon )

“and I want a good foundation of the stolider sort, a Baggins perhaps.” That pointed at once to Bilbo.

(Eugenics! Observing them like laboratory mouse lines! Call him a Charles River BILB/o the way you’re genotyping these poor little bastards for your purposes)

And I had known him once very well, almost up to his coming of age, better than he knew me.

(??? Hiding in the bushes spying or…?)

I liked him then. And now I found that he was “unattached” – to jump on again, for of course I did not know all this until I went back to the Shire. I learned that he had never married. I thought that odd, though I guessed why it was; and the reason that I guessed was not the one that most of the Hobbits gave me: that he had early been left very well off and his own master.

(Was it cos he’s gay as fuck, Gandalf)

No, I guessed that he wanted to remain “unattached” for some reason deep down which he did not understand himself – or would not acknowledge, for it alarmed him.

(I 100% now and for always love a narrator in a constant state of Just Fucking Lies To Everyone All The Time, Giving Us Nothing, Acknowledging Nothing Including Himself. NOPE NOT PROCESSING ANYTHING TODAY THANKS. WE’RE CLOSED. COME BACK TOMORROW. just A Massive Liar about everything and for what!!! Bilbo Baggins my beloved you were born wrong.)

He wanted, all the same, to be free to go when the chance came, or he had made up his courage. I remembered how he used to pester me with questions when he was a youngster about the Hobbits that had occasionally “gone off ”, as they said in the Shire. There were at least two of his uncles on the Took side that had done so.’

You can see why I love this! And I can see why Tolkien didn’t include it, too. Still very fun passage and near enough to canon to be used if you ever want to.

[muzzlemouths]

"sleeper agent" this and "the brainrot returned" that. those robots have had me by the throat since 2021 and they aren't letting go

[inkskinned]

the problem is that being single is seen as the consolidation prize, and not the natural neutral state of being-a-person. at the end of the movie or the book or the poetry, there is a person waiting for you at the altar, and they love you. if the play is a comedy, everyone gets married. the metaphor is about how you are not-whole. the metaphor is about how everyone is going to be happily-ever-after. the metaphor is that romantic love is the most important resource on the planet, not just all-love. all-love is not a thing, that is a disappointment. the treasure is not the friends we made along the way. the treasure is the girl you landed.

the metaphor is that you cannot be alone, that means you are broken. are you getting over someone? that is acceptable, you can be getting over someone, but not for long. you must be single because you would rather not be single. you must be single and looking to not-be-single. you must want to date, eventually.

friendship and community are never seen as being equal-to or even-better than romantic connection. that person is your one! you need to find them. you need to hunt through the sand particles until you can shift out some kind of gem. this is regardless to your own experience of the beach and the sun. you need to be somewhere with someone.

if you are taking this time alone to heal, that is so sad. everyone gives you this little pitying look. the understanding is that you are not actually happier than you were before you were single. it is seen as a sort of pity - oh, you are choosing yourself, making yourself the priority? - that isn't quite right. you must mean that you are making yourself ready for the right person. you are just laying the bed better this time. open up your heart. you'll find them, we promise!

what do you mean you're really-truly genuinely-very happy? you are probably misremembering what it was like to be in a relationship. and besides, once you meet your person, that time will look grey and bland and wasted. your person is the only way for you to see in color. so what if you have taken this time - for the first time in your entire life - to actually-for-real do the fucking work. you can be proud of yourself, sure. but the way we need to know that you got better is that you get a partner. you're healed enough for the next bad part!

people don't choose to be single, they just say they're choosing to be single - they actually mean "nobody wants to date me." it doesn't matter how many people you have gently rejected or how many times you've talked it over carefully in therapy. what matters is that you are single, and by all accounts - that means you are something worth our pity. your successes and life all seem pale in the sunlight. sure, you have done amazing things and finally found your way in life. what matters is that there wasn't a person in the room with you while you did it.

you want to tell them - that's the whole thing. i didn't know how to be alone in the room. i didn't know how to handle the silence. every moment was so sharp, and i kept choosing the wrong way to close the door. i have spent my entire life in the empty well, living in the ricochet of someone else's cruelty. for once i have built myself a ladder. for once everything i taste is all mine, every bite of sunshine and laughter. i have learned how to sleep out in the open with my memories. recently, they have started to purr.

your father rolls his eyes. listen. this isn't about you. i just want a grandchild in my future.

[moonlightcycle571]

Getting run over by a train: a guide to how to

Do you know how The Wizard summoned Billy by running him run over by a magic train. What if that was the trains way of giving you permission to enter the rock. Like, once you got run over once, you can go in to travel if you have The Wizard or Billy’s permission.

So now imagine Billy summoning The Train when his colleagues need to go to the Rock of Eternity.

*at the train tracks*

Zatanna,: Thank you so much for letting me visit, this really means a lot to me.

Captain Marvel: oh don’t worry about it. Do be mindful of the train though.

Zatanna: the what

*gets run over by the train*

It becomes sort of a hazing ritual among the close circle of magic friends who visit the Rock. Zatanna had fantastic footage of Constantine loosing his mind before during and after the event.

And don’t think Train-kun is limited to train tracks. Captain Marvel needed to bring Hawkwoman to the Rock asap cause there was a situation where he needed her to check a Thanagarian artifice kept at the rock. She agreed whilst they where both flying. Footage of a random train hitting the both of them and all three parties disappearing.

Yes Billy has to get hit by the train when he brings someone knew that doesn’t have users access. It’s normal.

Clark: so you get hit by a train in a regular basis to go to your … rock?

Marvel: only when I get new people that the train doesn’t really approve of. And when we first met. But we’re cool.

JL: *concerned noises*

Batman adds magic train to his conspiracy board.

Bonus points if he uses the train to capture high end villains to put them in the dungeons / monster lands / prison of eternity.

Super powerful magical entity villain: AND YOU SHALL TUE THE DAY YOU EV-

*gets hit by a truck*

Marvel, whistling as he picks up the villains grimoire: well that was a close one. Good thing they were monologuing, otherwise that wouldn’t have worked as well as it did.

Reporter nearby: Captain did you throw a train at them????

Marvel: Train does what Train wants. Train wants speedruns.

Just fun little thoughts :D

[kaijutegu]

Imagine going to class and instead of your anthropology instructor, this thing is there.

[welcometogrouchland]

Hi hello I'm not dead I just didn't post art for nearly 3 weeks bc I took an anxious break from this app and then immediately got sick afterwards <3 so here's the backlog

[mohntilyet]

veilguard spoilers regarding a josie romance. but can we talk about the letter josie sends to a romanced inquisitor because. i’m sorry. fucking losing my mind at the fact that the inquisitor and josephine are close enough friends with the guy the inquisitor duels in her romance to be invited to meet his third child. implying they’ve been invited to the other two. at a baby shower and getting introduced as the one who dueled the baby’s father because he was trying to steal your girl. antivan romances insane.

NO LITERALLLYYYYY. AND HE’S AN IN LAW. ITS TOO FUNNY. i cannot imagine how they met and how yvette probably was like “teehee…. the man that my sister spurned…. has fallen in love with ME!” and the best/worst part is that ortranto really has. i like to think of them running around with each other and secretly meeting as though their families actually hate each other (they really don’t lol) . the ortrantos would probably be delighted to have their son actually marry a montilyet like they wanted, even better that they’re actually in love and it’s not arranged!

i have this image of josie going like “you can’t marry him. is this a joke, because it’s not funny. i almost embarrassed him! the only reason the ortrantos do not hate us is because he is a very kind man who saw that i was in love with the inquisitor! ….yes i suppose a very kind man like that could love you…….. yes of course i want you to be happy…… yvette gabrielle montilyet, i fear you are not hearing what i’m saying— DON’T SAY YOU ARE ALREADY AN ORTRANTO. DID YOU ELOPE? ah okay. don’t do that. i said don’t do that. yvette come back and listen to me” etc etc

of course i must believe that there was a big scene caused (once again) by a montilyet and ortranto that ends with lord ortranto making a speech where the publicly declares his love for yvette in front of all of antiva city to see and hear. so there’s no backing out from this one. in my mind there’s a rehash of the big “BECAUSE I LOVE HER!” (ortranto, desperate but genuine), “you do?” (completely aghast josie who has somehow missed the fact her sister has been giggling even more than usual), plus an “OF COURSE HE DOES!” (a thrilled yvette) that reminds josie so fondly of her own love story that she's immediately relaxed (and suddenly accepting) about this whole thing <3

[filurig]

instructional booklet for basal and listless ceteceans feeling like looking for porpoise

[mcytegg]

im ngl i feel like clowns current relationship w ros in realms is the type of relationship ls kab expected/wanted from clown. like they wanted clown to be someone they could rely on to always protect them and to stick by their side always, but i dont think this type was ever possible for the two of them, even if kab had succeeded in "proving" themself like clown said he wanted them to.

like even if we ignore that it was already incredibly unlikely given the nature of lifesteal and how clown could never trust anyone on ls wholly and completely knowing they COULD betray him and try to kill him at any moment, i actually think who kab is as a person is Why they never wouldve been able team w clown like they wanted to

not bc kab has specifically done anything wrong or done anything to make clown be against teaming w them, but bc kab lacks the distinct, very specific type of open and unashamed vulnerability people like branzy and ros exhibit both in general and w clown specifically that he seems drawn to. kab is too guarded and too tricky as a person to ever be vulnerable and openly reliant on clown in a way that makes him feel the Need to take care of nd protect them.

its not as if ros and branzy are incapable in the slightest; branzy is a cunning and surprisingly revenge driven guy and ros is incredibly smart and clearly WANTS to come out of her shell to fight for herself and for the people she holds dear, but w clown specifically they are so openly and easily vulnerable w him. they will go to him for protection and if they want to explore their own bloodlust, and they make clown feel needed and valued in an incredibly specific way. like theyre basically people he can save and protect in a way nobody else can bc he IS just the strongest, and nobody else can take care of them in the way he can bc of his strengeth and bc of the softness they show w him.

and kab is just...not that type of person. they could never be someone who leaves themself as openly vulnerable and reliant on clown in the way he needs to be needed for the relationship kab wanted w him. like kab is too scared and way too paranoid abt everything that could go wrong to put themself in a position like that. they lack the open softness and sorta "damsel" vibes that clown is drawn to in branzy and ros. the thing that makes him feel so strongly abt protecting them and taking care of them.

bc ultimately, kab is someone will fight and stop at nothing survive. there will never be a situation where theyd rely on clown to help or save them without any sort of other plan, so the fact that they would never need him in the way that makes him feel the most cared for and wanted means their relationship was never going to be what kab wanted it to be. and kab seems to have realized this, at least!!! that its smt they dont have w clown, but they can get something like what they need in mane bc he WILL protect them in the way they need but theres no rose tinted glasses for kab to view mane through so their relationship is, funnily enough, much more equal than kabs relationship w clown ever was due to the way they idolized him

[egophiliac]

DOGS

IN

SPACE

[mushyfart]

megan halsey they could never make me hate you

[adobe-outdesign]

Popped onto Scarlet to get that shiny mystery gift Pelipper (code: W1DEGUARDLA1C25 until Nov 21st if anyone else wants one)

very shaped