#is this a weird thing to be worried about is this stupid is this selfish

[pissfizz]

I’m going to lose my mind oh my god I am so scared for this quincenera wtf

[runawayolives]

So for baby daddy Nate: when they are older and married reader can't handle anymore and they both fight she ask for divorce but the kid hear it.? Hope you write about this.

This isn't canon, I think.

This belongs to Baby Daddy.

"I think we should get a divorce."

"What?"

"I said that I think we should get a divorce."

"I heard you the first time."

The Jacobs' household was soaked in silence, the two young adults in the kitchen after setting their kid to bed. Nate was sitting on the armchair near the kitchen island, while she was cleaning the remaining of dinner. He stood up, walking towards his wife, invading her personal space.

"Can I know where this is coming from?" The faucet had been dripping for a bit, probably because it knew breaking the silence was its new task.

"I don't think we need to be married." Her hand was gripping a damp towel, hyper-focusing in a little circle of coffee from that morning. "We aren't a married couple, we're just two adults living in a house and raising a child."

"Who's fault is that?"

"Don't blame me." The circle was finally gone. "You were the one who married a woman who never wanted you." Their eyes met for the fist time since they put their child to bed.

"Don't say that shit."

"Mommy? Daddy? I'm thirsty." Both young adults turned around to look at the small figure standing by the hallway. The way they were gripping the doorway and their half hidden body proved that the child had been there for longer.

"Mommy will get you some." Quickly she turned around to fill a plastic cup with water. "Here hon. Do you need help going back to bed?"

"I want daddy to do it." Those big brown eyes were too hard to deny, making Nate walk forward.

"Come on, Jojo, I'll read you another story." He lifted his child to his hip, somehow still dwarfing the child, as if they hadn't grown since they were still a baby.

"Goodnight mommy."

"Goodnight, baby."

The staircase was full of picture frames of the young family, at the park, the zoo, on christmas. Endless memories that his stupid wife wanted to throw away because she was a quitter and a coward.

"What were you and mommy talking about?"

"Nothing you have to worry about."

"You were mad. Is mommy in trouble? Should she sit on the step?" Jojo was the most terrifying child Nate had ever met. The big eyes, the big cheeks and their calm nature made them look like a small victorian child that had seen too much. Jojo had a normal childhood, two parents that loved them, friends, and two set of grandparents that spoiled the kid a bit too much. Normal, very normal child.

Nate thought all the weird things that came out of Jojo were her fault. She burdened their child, he knew it. Jojo played like any other kid, Jojo had the same taste buds as any other kid. But Jojo asked uncomfortable questions and would stare at you for a bit too long, as if the five year-old was trying to figure you out.

She spent too much time raising the child, got bored because she's a stupid selfish bitch and decided to treat Jojo like an adult. Too many books, too many paintings and too many museums.

Jojo loved their mom, and Nate was envious. Not because Jojo didn't love Nate, but because looking at them proved what relationships between mother and child could be. Martha hadn't been present, she was home, and she picked him up from school, but his dad was the one in charge of raising him.

Seeing Jojo and Y/N somehow was the Universe or whatever entity rubbing it his face. You had the potential for having this, but you didn't.

The white walls of his kid's room were covered in little scribbles on the wall, something they hadn't bothered in correcting as long as it was only in these walls. The dinosaur lamp was still on, spreading the room in the light green light. Some story books were laying on the ground, and some books. Original versions of classics such as Little Women and To kill a mockingbird laid besides The very humgry caterpillar and The Giving tree.

During the walk up and the small back rubs Nate was giving Jojo, the five-year old had fallen asleep, long eyelashes tickling their cheeks. The toddler was set on the brand new ocean life bed sheets, their latest obsession, and immediately started hugging the handmade-crochet whale they had made with their mom's help.

After setting the kid to sleep and kissing their small forehead, Nate went downstairs. His wife was were he left her, this time with a mug between her hands.

"If you think I'll give you a divorce and let you separate me from my son, you're way stupider than I thought."

[suhkusa]

EGOIST SIDE STORY. — FOREVER

PAIRING. Sakusa Kiyoomi x f!Reader

CW. fast paced, fluff with slightest of angst

A/N. alt ending for sakusa lovers (me)

-> MAIN SERIES.

Sakusa doesn’t know if you remember him. If anything, he would be more surprised if you did remember him. It was just one interaction during your high school years after all. 

YEARS AGO. SPRING NATIONALS.

“Are you alright?” 

You look up from your seat. You had come to this stupid national volleyball tournament because your friend made you, but she’s off somewhere flirting with a man from another team. You had dozed off and you didn’t even realize Inarizaki was playing their last set of the match. 

Now there was this strange man in a volleyball uniform and a mask in front of you. Oh, he said something to you didn’t he?

“Oh, yeah,” you feel self-conscious under his gaze.

He looks away for a second before looking back at you. 

“Are you from Inarizaki?” 

You nod at his question. You can feel the awkwardness oozing from your presence. You feel sorry you don’t contribute much to the conversation.

“Well if you get bored, Itachiyama’s match starts on court C in like 30 minutes,” he nods his head at you before striding off.

There was something laced in his stern voice that you couldn’t quite put a finger on. Pity? Care? You didn’t really know. 

Ah. You should’ve asked for his name.

AT MSBY.

It couldn’t be. You couldn’t be. Fate was weird. You’re the girl from the Spring Tournament weren’t you?

“Y/N,” you extend your arm towards him, “Nice to meet you… Sakusa? Right?”

“Yeah, Sakusa,” he takes your hand and gives it a small shake before letting go.

He couldn’t help but watch you as you introduce yourself to every member individually. Couldn’t help how he noticed you tense and hesitated as you got to Atsumu. He tried not to think about it too much.

-

When you got too drunk and that whole thing with the guy happened at the bar, Sakusa only did what was right. Take care of you and help you.

But you looked ethereal. Honestly. Part of him feels wrong saying that. Even as you lay peacefully sleeping in his own apartment. 

He didn’t want to let himself fall for you. It felt unprofessional, and Sakusa was anything but. But he couldn’t help it.

And so any chance he’d get, he would try to slip himself into your life, little by little. Maybe you’d notice. Or if you didn’t, at least he would still get to spend time with you.

Imagine how excited he was when he found out you played the exact same games as him! 

But then you started to turn a foot towards Atsumu. Even after that fiasco of a yelling-match the two of you had? It stung a bit. He was definitely hurt. So Sakusa decided to distance himself. That was the only thing that he felt like he could do. But if you ever changed your mind, he’d be here. As a friend or whatever you wanted him to be.

Then the two of you took the fall of Atsumu’s actions together. At first he didn’t know that Atsumu was behind all of it, not until you joined a video call and ranted to him about it. He honestly just cared about you and your well-being. 

He was selfish. He was ugly and selfish because he was glad that Atsumu was finally out of your life and the two of you could go back to the way things used to be. 

“Atsumu- I mean Miya came to my house last night,” you say, your voice static-y through the phone.

His heart dropped. What happened? Did he apologize? Did you forgive him?

“Oh,” is all he can manage. 

“What? Oh?” you laugh, “Don’t worry, he just apologized and… And maybe I got emotional but nothing happened, I promise,” he can feel himself sigh in relief at the last bit of your sentence.

NOW BOARDING TO LOS ANGELES INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT. 

“Is that you?” Sakusa asks.

He can hear you struggle a bit, probably grabbing your bags. “Mm, yep,” there’s moving noises.

“Well, you have a safe flight, Y/N. Make sure you text me when you get to your room, okay?” Sakusa is sad. He hopes the two of you can stay in contact. 

“I’ll miss you, Omi,” you say, and he knows you know he hates that nickname. But if it’s you, he’ll let it slide.

“What? Don’t get all sappy on me now,” he says, “I’m going to miss you a lot more, Y/N,”

Sakusa swears he hears you sniffle a bit. 

“A-Alright, I’ll see you soon, Kiyoomi,” you say one last time.

“I’ll see you soon, Y/N,” he mutters, the line going dead soon after.

Fuck.

———

It’s scary how someone across the world can make you feel so loved. It’s been 2 years since you’ve left Japan. And every day since then, you and Kiyoomi have talked. Texted, called, video chatted, anything and everything.

You’d be lying if you said you weren’t developing a tiny bit of feelings for him. But you couldn’t tell if he felt the same. Tones and emotions are so hard to read through a screen. For all you know, he could be acting as a friend and you’re just reading too much into it.

“I am coming to Japan,” you state, you can hear him shuffling on the other side of the call.

“Mm, hm? What?” he sounds a bit shocked, “for what?”

“The season just ended here, and I don’t really have anything to do. I’ve been homesick for the past 2 years, and I don’t think it’s going away anytime soon. Oh, I’d be there for just a week, though,”

“Ah, I see. Do you already have a place to stay? I can lend you the guest room?”

You think it over, but you don’t think you should consider the feelings you’ve been feeling towards him recently.

“We’ll see, thank you Kiyoomi,”

“Of course. When is your flight back?” 

“Next week,”

———

Next week became this week. Then this week became today. 

Apparently everyone wanted to come visit Japan because all hotels and motels were booked fully. That’s how you found yourself a taxi ride later in Sakusa Kiyoomi’s guest bedroom.

You had decided to keep your return under the wraps, not wanting any attention or big reactions, or… other people to catch wind. 

It was in the very beginning of your stay back home in Japan that Sakusa Kiyoomi proclaimed his love for you.

“I think I love you. Or well, I do love you, sorry,” he looks like he’s ashamed as the two of you sit in front of his fireplace. 

At first you just stare at him as if you two were sharing a normal conversation. But then the cogs in your brain began to turn. 

“Y-You don’t have to say anything,” he’s freaking out behind those still eyes of his. You can see it, “I’m sorry, let’s just.. let’s just forget about it,

“I love you, too,”

His head snaps towards you, “What?”

You feel tense under his gaze, unsure as to what your next move should be. 

“I- Sorry,” you scoot back, “I really do love you… You’ve been there for me for so long, even when that whole thing with him happened… I’m sorry it feels like it took me so long,”

His warm hand meets under your chin.

“Only forever, idiot,” he smiles at you. “I feel like I’ve known since the day you walked in,”

There’s tears in your eyes because you believe him. He really had been there since the very beginning. 

“Don’t cry,”

“B-But I have to leave in a week and-”

“Then that gives us a whole week to be with one another… if that’s what you want,”

A tear drips down your cheek. “Then we’d have to do long distance and I don’t want you to wait,” you look into his eyes with your glossy ones.

“I’d wait eternity for you, Y/N,” is all he says before dipping his head down to yours and welcoming your lips into his. 

You basically cry into the kiss, until the kiss gets sloppy and you’re coming onto him.

And maybe you gave all of yourself to him that night. And maybe every night after that.

The goodbye is bittersweet. You know the two of you will meet again, but are unsure when. Being deduced to only being able to communicate through your telephone is hard. Especially after all of your feelings were finally let out of the bag. The two of you know your love will keep you guys intertwined until you guys see each other again. 

When that is, is the only thing that’s uncertain.

PRESENT.

“Do you still like me?

“I think you know the answer to that, Y/N,” he says sadly, “all too well,”

A sigh escapes your lips.

“You know you shouldn’t, Atsumu,” you say, and it tears his heart apart. He thought this night

would’ve ended differently if he answered that way.

“Y/N, can’t we try again?” he pleads. Atsumu knows he’s beginning to sound desperate, but he can’t lose his grasp on you, not when he just found you again.

“Atsumu… I’m dating Kiyoomi,” 

You can visibly see his heart sink. It looks like he’s trying to find something to say, but all that comes out is silence.

You’re not sure what to do or say, letting the cool air blow against you. The awkward silence is broken when the doors behind you open.

“Y/N?”

“Ah, Omi,” you turn to face him.

“The guys wanted to take shots, did you want to join?” 

“Sure” you walked towards him before giving Atsumu one last glance back. “Did you want to join us—”

“Yeah- yeah, I’ll be there in a second,” the blonde mumbles.

You nod towards him before you latch onto Sakusa, he welcomes you into a tight hug.

“What were you guys talking about?” he queries.

“Oh, nothing, just… him stuff,” you offer a fake laugh.

“We can talk about it later if you need?”

“Yeah, that’s fine, let’s just get that shot, you deserve it after that win,” you wink at him.

As you walk off before him, Sakusa Kiyoomi gets hit with a wave of realization of how lucky he is to be with you. There’s so many ways this could have turned out, yet you chose him.

He can’t wait for you to come back to Japan, the two of you have been discussing you moving in with him and so much more.

He’s not telling you just yet, but he’s even planning a little trip for your guys’ anniversary. 

Sakusa is going to do everything in his power to make you happy. He’s waited all this time and he’s finally gotten the chance to make you happy.

To love you.

END. 

© all writings belongs to suhkusa 2024. do not repost or change.

[fruitmins]

Agust Dad—Six

➭ summary: Your a producer from another company that he happened to be collaborating with on his 2nd album D-2. At the release party— one drunk action leads to another, you do the worst thing you can do in the industry and change your fate forever.

➭genre: short series, pregnancy au, idol au, angst, dad au

➭warnings: time jump (don’t hate me for it), twitter, you kinda pee yourself at the end, panic attack/meltdown, angst, don’t worry there’s at least a little fluff in the beginning, fainting, cliffhanger-ish

<next part>

note: the storm :)

Taglist: @welcometomyworld13 @tatyhend @jiminiesunicorn @littlestarstinyseven @baechugff @thelilbutifulthings @tearykth @familiarlikemymirror3 @coree730 @prajusstuff @wobblewobble822 @choisoorin @manuosorioh @0funsite0 @whipwhoops @bergandysam @aloverga @illnevertrustmyselfagain @silentreadersthings @butterymin @girl-nahh @linneasblog @cuntessaiii @nikkiordonez12 @chl0buggy @serendididy @llallaaa @ghostlyworld @roguesthetic @captainchrisstan @bxcndd @lukeys-giggle

3 MONTHS LATER

You shifted and turned in the mirror, studying the slight bump that phased through the expensive flowy red dress that Yoongi had convinced you to let him buy.

You weren’t all that surprised. Over the past months Yoongi had been buying the most ridiculous things for you without blinking an eye. Any weird food you wanted, Yoongi would have it in less than thirty minutes.

What you were surprised about was the main reason you wanted the beautiful dress in the first place. Jin had invited you to a party he and the rest of the boys were throwing a party In celebration of a successful Bang Bang Con.

Then he revealed he was going to propose to Harin who like Yoongi, you’d gotten close to over the months. When though you weren’t Yoongi’s girlfriend (even though it was starting to feel like you were) she still thought it would be nice for the two of you to be close.

It shouldn’t have surprised you that he invited you, but somehow it did. No matter how much time you spent with BTS, you couldn’t help but be insecure about how your connection with Yoongi happened. It weren’t proud of it in the slightest, even though Harin has reassured you many times they didn’t judge you.

But still, you had a frown on your face as you stared at yourself in the mirror. You didn’t want the new bump to be all that visible, and you couldn’t help but feel anxious and nervous.

You hear a small knock on the door before it cracks open slightly, revealing Yoongi who was already ready and in a nice black suit that matches his ridiculous long black hair.

Your heart pounds when you see him all dressed up, thinking back to the night long ago that had gotten you into this mess. You can’t help but feel a flutter in your heart, like when you two first met. The warm feeling that flowed in your blood whenever you saw him.

Unlike first time, the feelings were much stronger now. You tired to push away the fuzzy feeling whenever he looked at you these past few months. The way he had gradually opened up to you and cared for you. You chalked it up to just being hormonal, but a part of you had always liked him a bit more than you are supposed to. And it was only getting stronger the times he was away training and at BangBangCon. You felt ashamed how much relief washed over you when they were finished, just over the fact that he could spend time with you again.

You were starting to get stupid and selfish again. Just like that night where you stupid and selfishly gave into him for your own pleasure and enjoyment.

Seeing that you were fully clothed, he stepped more into the room, a small smile on his face as he did so.

You turn away from the mirror to face him fully, gesturing to your dress. “How do I look?” You let out a nervous chuckle, slightly scared of his answer.

He takes a minute to study you fully, looking from top to bottom before finally responding. "Pretty," Yoongi said quietly, standing in the doorway, a small smile on his face as he looks at you. "You look beautiful."

Your heart flutters as you stare at him. Despite everything that's happened, you can't help but feel excited to be here, with him, in this moment.

“You definitely have a pregnancy glow.” He praises again, this time with a little playful chuckle and you turn away from him, praying that you weren’t blushing. “Thanks.”

You mess with your hair once more before grabbing your high heels and sitting in the edge of the bed to put them on. Yoongi is quick to kneel down on his knee to take them from you.

“Can I?” He trails off softly even though he already took them, getting ready to put them on your foot before pausing for a moment. He tilts his head slightly before staring at you for a moment with his eyes wide. "Are you really planning on wearing those?" He says in realization.

You nod immediately, trying to take the shoes away from him. “They go with the dress.” You state in slight confusion. You weren’t that heavy yet.

"I don't think it's a good idea, Y/N." he says cautiously, the concern for your wellbeing evident in his tone but gentle as always.

“They’re the only shoes I have for the occasion. Well flats would work but I don’t have any good ones.” You mumble, mostly to yourself before looking at him with a slight pout while trying to ignore the butterflies in your stomach. Telling yourself for the millionth time that he was concerned for your baby and not you.

Yoongi can’t help but let out a small amused smile at your pout. "Y/N, I'll buy you the nicest flats you've ever seen, just don't wear those." He says, making a sharp gesture towards the heels he’s holding.

"You're going to be standing for almost the entire night, so wearing heels would be very uncomfortable, and besides, it's dangerous to wear heels when you're this far along in a pregnancy." Yoongi takes a slow breath, his concern for you showing more clearly than back when everything was first happening. Though he was never really hiding it from you.

“You’d buy flats, right now?” You ask, slightly surprised but suspicious. “I don’t want to make us late or have you buy more things for me.”

"Of course.“ he responds without hesitating, even rolling his eyes a little. “I’ll be right back.”

The moment he says this, Yoongi leaves the room and rushes out of the house, leaving you alone in the bedroom as you listen to the door slamming shut.

The moments you wait for him to return are painfully long, and you can hear your own heart beating in your ears. And just as you finish your thoughts, Yoongi walks through the door once again. You immediately look down at his hands, and see two bags in each, with the flats open. You sit up in disbelief. Yoongi really just came back with four new pairs of flats.

"Here they are." he says, handing you bag with a small smile. "I went to a nearby shop and told the shopkeeper to give you all the best ones. I hope they fit." he adds, his tone anxious as he waits for you to put them on.

"Oh my god." you say, shaking your head as you take each pair out. They're all the top design and incredibly stylish, and more importantly, incredibly comfortable looking. You couldn't have asked for a better selection.

Yoongi smiles as you continue to examine the shoes, your heart warmed by his gesture. You try on both on the pairs, both equally as soft and comfy as they looked.

“Thank you so much.” You say, still wide eyed as you picked the best color and design and started to walk around to get a feel. You couldn’t even express how grateful you were for him.

“Alright, let’s go.” You say, catching yourself before you can be overly emotional as the two of you rush out to his car and drive to Jin’s surprise proposal party.

The two of you pile into the car and drive off to the party. Yoongi turns to face you, his eyes filled with concern and worry. "We don't have to stay too late, alright?"

You nod your head, not too upset about it. As long as the two of you end up having a nice evening, you don't mind leaving early.

You arrive at the small spot a moments later. Yoongi does the honors of helping you out of the car as the two of you head inside of the small house that Jin rented.

The two of you walk in and look around the nicely decorated area. As you walk inside, you see that the party is underway. There are streamers hanging from the ceiling, and a table with snacks and drinks set up in the corner. There isn’t a lot of people there either, just BTS and some close family members on both sides.

Jin greets you both with a nervous smile, and you can feel yourself beginning to relax. This seems like it'll be a decent event, and not the tense affair that you were expecting. What helps is that it’s a private party, not a camera in sight and no reporters can see you.

“Yoongi! Y/N! Your here.” He says with a big smile despite being so nervous, giving you each a small hug. “Thank you for coming.”

“Of course Jin.” Yoongi says with a small, putting a hand on his shoulders and to try to calm his nerves. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Y/N, honey, you look great.” He says giving you one last night squeezes before leaving you to mingle around.

The rest of BTS come up to greet you and Yoongi as well, feeling slightly nervous when Yoongi leaves to get you and himself something to drink.

The party is lowkey, not upbeat and filled with people speaking on top of each other as everyone mingled.

You happen to spot Harin in the distance from the couch you sat on, so you walk up to greet her. She gasp happily when she sees you, giving you a big hug as the two of you chatted away.

Suddenly, someone touches their glass to get everyone’s attention. You both turn it see all of the members in a small circle. “To a successful BangBangCon. Even though it was online it was still nice to see all of ARMY.” Namjoon started and everyone hummed and nodded in agreement, going along with the facade.

All of the members do a small speech until Jin is the last one. Jin stood up and the lights turn off, leaving the room in darkness.

A few minutes of silence and fake murmuring, Jin's voice cuts through the silence as he now stood in front of his Harin who was next to you. "Harin, we've been through a lot in the past few months. We've been on opposite ends of it all, but one thing remains constant," he says, his voice shaking slightly. “My love for you.”

A faint glow cuts through the darkness as Jin bends down on one knee, holding out a small black box in his hand.

Harin takes a moment to process everything before covering her mouth with her hand.

Jin's eyes sparkle as he looks up at her. "Will you marry me?" he asks, his voice soft yet strong.

Harin is speechless, her eyes widening in shock and surprise. She takes a moment before nodding her head. Tears stream down her face. "Yes, I'll marry you."

The both of them explode into tears, and the room erupts into a joyful celebration. You clap along with everyone else in celebration, your eyes even watering a little as they cried and kissed.

The party after is filled with almost everyone beside you and Yoongi getting tipsy and having fun. Lights now flashing and music now blasting through some speakers.

A little while later you find Yoongi again, happily chatting and congratulating Jin with the rest of the members. You were getting tired and wanted to leave. You were getting a headache from the lights and loud music, and quite frankly your social battery has reached zero quickly after the propose.

You saw him, smiling and laughing with his slightly tipsy younger members and simply didn’t have the heart to interrupt him. You could put up with the party for another hour or two.

But as you walked away from them, Yoongi’s head suddenly turns and meets yours. He takes one look at your face and expression and knows it time leave, so as you walk out you see him excuse and say goodbye to his members before lightly jogging next to you.

“Hey, time to go?” He asked softly, still a small smile on his face from talking with the members.

“No, it’s fine.” You shake your head quickly, wanting him to have more fun. You didn’t want to be selfish once again.

“You look tired. Let’s go home. It’s getting late anyways.” He states nonchalantly before locking your arm and practically dragging you to the car.

He opens the door for you drive home in some comfortable silence, resting your eyes and feeling warm from the nice atmosphere.

The two of you get out of the car, and as soon as you step inside, you go straight to the bedroom. You take off your shoes and lay down in the comfy bed, covering yourself in the fresh blankets.

Moments later you are out like a light but only to wake up in the middle of the night to quickly use the restroom.

You groggily get up, checking your phone to see the time. It’s an hour past midnight and everything in the house is dark and cold.

Your eyes squint as you look at the bright screen, eyes lightly skimming over your notifications. Your eyes brown in confusion when you see a familiar coworker has texted you out of the blue.

‘Y/N, is this you?’

You get a sinking feeling in your stomach looking at the text, slowly opening up your phone to see the attachment with it.

Your face pales and your throat closes in fear when see a screenshot from a video of yourself at the party. Clearly pregnant and stood directly in frame next to Harin who was staring at Jin down on one knee.

Your blood runs cold when you see the screenshot. It's exactly as you guessed it would be: yourself standing next to Harin with a noticeable baby bump.

You freeze in your tracks as an overwhelming sense of panic washes over you. Your heart is soaring at a rapid rate, and you feel like you're going to throw up.

You don't know what to do. You don't know how to handle this situation. But you find your hands shakily downloading twitter again in a heartbeat.

The moment you do the first thing you see is the screenshot had been spreading around the wildfire. You can't believe your eyes when you see the screenshot on Twitter. It's viral, quickly making its way around the platform and receiving an overwhelming amount of attention from both the media and fans.

You feel your heart sinking in your chest as you see your body in the media spotlight in this way, even though it hasn't been confirmed that it's really you.

Sometime after the party, Jin had uploaded his proposal to happily and innocently show his fans, and people had started to notice a pregnant woman in the background.

#RedDress was trending.

WHO IS SHE? was trending.

Thousands of ARMY’s were connecting the dots, putting together that whoever the woman was is Yoongi’s ‘girlfriend’.

Jealous fans are picking apart off every inch of your body, calling you disgusting names all over again just like when the official statement was released. But now ten times worse. Crazy fans were trying to find out your official identity, hoping that it would lead them to Yoongi.

You start to have a breakdown, seeing just how exposed you were now. You were crying, barley even breathing as you felt a sting of pain in your stomach. You felt hot and cold at the same time as your mind got fuzzy and clouded with all types of worry.

Your eyelids start to get heavy, your ability to get out of bed to pee now gone as black dots started to appear.

You glance towards the door, desperately trying to call out to Yoongi who was peacefully asleep in the guest bedroom but you’re so panicked and out of control you can’t even speak.

You start to hyperventilate as the black spots get bigger and your body gives out, the last thing you remember being your head hitting the bed frame as you grew unconscious.

[harmonysanreads]

HARMONYYY i just finished the penacony quest and OH MY GOD. the emotional damage wtf... and the murderer 😕 i honestly don’t think anyone could’ve foreseen that

on another note, sunday really does have huge yandere potential !!! (i was swooning the entire time he was on screen im sorry.) he literally isn’t beating the allegations at all. even the other characters comment on how weird it is for him to casually keep a model of the golden hour, because what in the control freak 😭

he seems like he’d play dollhouse with darling. after all, in a place like that, every single aspect of it is under his thumb — literally. having that much control over your circumstances is a reassurance. oh, are the placeholder models crashing? don’t worry dear, he can fix the malfunctions. he can even make them speak more realistically for you. he can give anything to you, even change the layout of the place entirely if you’re bored of it. you want to get back to normal size? well, he can’t quite do that just yet, please understand..

or if he pulls that weird interrogation magic thing on them. darling who just lies through the entire thing, and he uses this to scare them about the death countdown while not mentioning the part that he has the power to really just cancel it in the end. though, the same trick won’t work on them twice. at least the process gets darling to become part of the family in the end.

not to mention the spies he has everywhere. stupid birds watching you in every corner…

idk i just want to hold him and shake him aggressively. out of love, of course.

- 🕯️

When I tell you I've lost sleep over the thought of just how much more Sunday is probably capable of doing, nonnie.

If he has access to technology and power like this, which are all unrestricted for his personal use moreover, imagine the things he's hiding. And imagine farther the things he had to do to get to where he is today, another dash of spice to the mix. I went back to his scenes and did some thinking. The me-slandering-Sunday is obviously a joke but I really, really hope people just don't focus on the morally-gray and questionable aspects of him and completely disregard his other characteristics now.

If you think about things from his perspective, he really is just trying his best to keep the image of The Family. But the loss of probably the only person he trusted with his heart and the disregard to bring justice to that case from The Family's side, compelled him to put his agenda first (as he himself mentions that he allowed Aventurine to pull that stunt so that it'd lure Gallagher out). What we get from this is, while Sunday is an extremely dedicated member of their faction, he had to learn to be selfish in certain situations to save his and Robin's backs.

The desire to control usually comes from a feeling of helplessness. We can make some speculations based on the current information of why Sunday has these tendencies, I've also seen some people say he has OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) but, we can't be sure until his full lore drops. Another thing to note about Sunday is how lonely he probably is, especially at present. The Family is in chaos, the situation of Robin, external forces' traps, the Charmony festival's deadline and he doesn't even have one person he can sit down with and not question their motives. He really must want to rest just as much as the characters around him are suggesting.

So basically, Sunday is a multi-layered character, just like Aventurine. He's definitely a politician, is what I'll say. Even though he is a control freak whose motives are hard to guess, he's still that little boy fighting for his and Robin's shared dream inside.

[pilot-boi]

Jaune’s friends throw him a birthday party only to find out he has long forgotten his own birthday in the Ever After, never mind how old he technically is.

Jaune’s friends have been acting weird all week.

Of course, he’s not a very good judge of what counts as weird anymore. Living for decades in a world where the brooks would literally babble and time was literally money would do that to you.

But he feels pretty sure that they’re being weird.

They keep huddling in groups whispering to each other, only to see him coming and abruptly change the subject, or just straight up walk away. He might be out of practice reading social cues (and he was pretty abysmal to begin with, let’s be honest here) but even he can notice that.

Are they mad at him? He’s been trying his best to hold himself together since getting back. He’s been talking to Ren and Nora and Ruby when he’s spiring. Oscar has been a HUGE help adjusting to feeling out of place in his own skin. Heck, this morning he didn’t even wake up freaking out about being late! All things considered he thinks he’s been doing pretty okay.

So why are they all avoiding him?

“Do you have…”

“No, Ren’s taking care…”

“Oh good, then you can-”

Ruby and Weiss are lurking outside of an unused classroom, whispering intently to each other over an open notebook. Jaune perks up. “Hey guys! What’re you-”

They both look up at him, immediately cutting off their conversation. Weiss shuts her notebook with a snap. Jaune’s greeting trails off and his smile slips from his face as they stare at him.

“What uh… what are you guys up to?” Jaune asks.

Ruby and Weiss glance at each other. “Nothing you need to worry about,” Weiss responds eventually, Ruby shifting awkwardly behind her

“Are you sure? I could… maybe I could help!” he offers, hating how over-eager he must sound.

“I’m sure,” Weiss replies firmly, and Jaune wilts further. “Besides, we were just going, right Ruby?”

“We were? I mean, yeah! Yeah we were,” Ruby nods, already edging away. Can she really not even stand to be around him? “See ya later, I guess!” And the two of them hurry off down the hallway, already whispering to each other.

Jaune slumps. He thought he was doing better, but if Weiss and Ruby beat that hasty of a retreat at his mere presence? And not even the first one this week? Yeah, they’re definitely mad at him. He just wishes he knows what he did.

He shuffles his way back to the JNPER dorm. The whole time, he’s replaying the conversation in his head, nitpicking every over-exuberance, every awkward moment. He knows he’s out of practice, but he’s trying, really he is. Maybe they’re just finally getting tired of his lackluster performance? Tired of playing nice in the face of his bumbling?

The door is ajar when he returns, and he can hear Oscar and Nora’s voices inside.

“...just hard seeing him this way.”

“I know, it hurts me, too.”

He hesitates, hand hovering over the doorknob. He can’t help it. And yeah, eavesdropping is bad. But they’re talking about him, and if they don’t know he’s there, they will continue to do so. Of course, he might not like what he hears, but at least he’ll have answers. And since when does he do what’s good for him?

“...having trouble adjusting.”

“Yeah. But hopefully this will help!”

“I hope so. It’s been a while, but if we all work together we can make sure he stays away while we-”

Yeah. He’s heard enough.

Jaune shuts the door with a quiet click. Well, he was wrong at least. His friends aren’t mad at him. 

No. No, they hate him.

He lets his steps carry him away. He doesn’t much care where he ends up, he knows his friends won’t be there.

If they want him to stay away, he can do that. It was selfish of him (stupid of him) to want to immediately insert himself back into the team dynamic. They spent months grieving him while he was living in fairytale land, and then he shows back up and what? Just slots back in like nothing happened? Like they didn’t just spend the last few months of their lives thinking he was dead?

“Having trouble adjusting” Nora had said, and she’s right of course. It’s no secret that he’s been taking to Remnant like a fish to the desert.

But he’s been trying, gods he’s been trying!

Jaune knows he’s awkward and too loud and too big. Too used to stiffness in his limbs that would slow his movements, too used to a creak and a crack in his voice that would lower his tone. Too used to being alone to fit, like he’s a puzzle piece from a different set thrown in a box it doesn’t belong.

He knows he’s not okay, he’s not right. He knows that as well as he knows his name. (His name or his title? Which one is he anymore?) But to hear it spoken so plainly from a friend’s mouth…

Jaune doesn’t realize he’s crying until his vision blurs with tears.

Weiss and Ruby whispering to themselves about Ren (his teammate, his brother, he doesn’t even know what his brother is doing), saying they don’t need him, and leaving abruptly when he approaches. Nora and Oscar talking quietly about how badly he’s adjusting and how they need him to stay away.

He just wanted to be less alone, but he’s just pushing everyone away again. Too loud, too big, too much. Just like Alyx.

“Hey Arc, what’s with the moping?” Jaune jumps, whirls around, and blinks back into awareness. He’s in a courtyard dappled with the warm tones of sunset (Wasn’t it midday? How much time did he lose?), one of the few places in the city with plantlife. And there, glaring at him from under a palm tree, is Emerald.

He stares at her. She stares back. He can’t tell if she’s giving him time to calm down (stupid crying, stupid trauma, why won’t his lungs just work right) or if she just refuses to ask the question again.

Eventually his breathing steadies as much as it’s going to, and his panic begins to ebb. She’s still just staring at him.

His brain catches up. Right, she asked him a question.

“I’m not-” He swallows. No more bottling things up. He tried that already, and look where it got him. A bowl full of poison and a lake full of tattered paper. “I think everyone is mad at me. I think… I think they’re all just psyching themselves up to tell me that they’re… that they hate me.” Jaune admits, voice getting more quiet as he goes. And wow, he really must be hard up for people to talk to if he’s telling Emerald this.

She scoffs, rolling her eyes. “What? No. No they’re not.”

Jaune blinks, taken aback by her immediate response. “They’re not? But… but they’ve been avoiding me all week! Saying they don’t need me and that they want me to stay away! I just heard Nora, and she said-”

“They don’t hate you, trust me,” Emerald assures, cutting off his increasingly panicked rambling. And somehow, she sounds so sure of herself that he can’t help but trust her. “I don’t think they can hate you. Believe me, I’ve tried, and you’re annoyingly likeable. It sucks.”

“But if they don’t hate me then…” The words won’t come. Why are they avoiding him? Why are they working on something while deliberately not including him? Why do they want him to stay away?

The bewilderment must be plain on his face because Emerald sighs and stands. She mutters something under her breath that sounds like “those idiots can’t even…” but he doesn’t catch the rest.

“Gods damn puppy eyes. They’re just planning a… wait. Actually-” Emerald pulls out her Scroll. Jaune can’t see who she dials, but whoever it is picks up immediately. “Hey it’s me. Yeah. Yeah I know you’re busy but- Yeah I know you’re almost out of time-”

At this, Emerald glances at the sky for some reason and Jaune automatically follows her gaze. The sun is dipping behind the roof of the building, sending cool shadows across the courtyard. Jaune winces, reminded of the time he lost. How long was he wandering around the halls of Shade before he stumbled across Emerald?

“Yeah I know, I KNOW! Listen, Arc’s-” She gets cut off again, clearly growing more and more irritated. It’s probably Yang then, or Ruby. “Will you just shut up and listen?! Arc’s here! He’s here with me, so you can tell the rest of the idiot squad to stop worrying! He’s right here!” Jaune perks up. They were worried about him? But…

“He wandered past me after overhearing one of you… No he still doesn’t know, somehow, but he showed up freaking out and VERY disassociating and I had to calm him down! So if you don’t want a full meltdown on your hands, one of you get over here and get this show on the road, because I swear I am not equipped to deal with Jaune crying.”

Jaune. She called him Jaune. 

And earlier she said she doesn’t hate him.

And if she doesn’t hate him then… then maybe she wasn’t lying about the rest of his friends not hating him. It feels like there’s a happy balloon swelling in his chest, and gods dammit he’s starting to cry again.

Stupid high strung emotions, stupid post-meltdown crying, stupid heart caring so stupid much.

Emerald catches his eye and she winces. “Ah shit um… No everything’s fine, Arc’s just crying again. No I think it’s good tears this time, he’s got this big dopey smile on his face. Yeah. Yeah that’s the one. Can one of you get over here now? We’re in the garden off of our room. No the other one. See ya.”

She sighs and tucks her Scroll back in her pocket. “Ruby should be here any second.” Jaune beams at her. She squints at him. “What.”

He shrugs. “You’re a good friend.”

Emerald scoffs, folding her arms and looking away. “Yeah, whatever.”

There’s a burst of rose petals and Ruby materializes next to them. She’s speaking before her feet touch the ground! “-so sorry! Jaune! Oh gods we’ve been looking for you everywhere! Come on, the others are waiting-”

“You have? They are?? Wait what are-” Before he knows what’s happening, Ruby has wrapped herself, himself, and a reluctant Emerald up in her cape. “-you talking about?” Jaune says as soon as they land. And then the nausea hits.

“Oh crap, I forgot! Sorry…” Ruby apologizes, patting his back as he doubles over, breathing shallowly and leaning heavily on hands resting on shaky knees. “You okay?”

“Better than ever,” Jaune replies, chuckling weakly. “Just warn me next time. Please. Airships are bad enough but that was…”

“Horrible??!” Emerald interrupts, looking thoroughly ruffled.

“Intense,” he concludes, straightening with a shudder. They’re standing outside of an unused classroom, the same one as before. But then… why did Weiss and Ruby leave?

“Well? Go inside!” Ruby prods, bouncing next to the door.

Again, weird. But again, he’s no longer a great judge of what’s weird. So Jaune just opens the door and-

-and is immediately hit with a wall of sound comparable to a bomb going off.

They’re all lucky his sword is back in the dorm, or they’d all be nursing a few gashes. As it is, it takes an embarrassingly long amount of time for Jaune to realize he’s not under attack, and that all the yelling is just…

Birthday wishes? Is this a surprise party?

“Is this… for me?” Jaune asks, once his voice finds its way back to his throat.

“Of course it is, we’ve been planning this all week!” Yang hollers, from where she’s standing next to Blake and a pile of haphazardly wrapped presents.

“We wanted it to be a surprise,” Blake shrugs, looking sheepish. “Guess we took the secrecy a bit too far.”

“We didn’t mean to make you worry!” Nora apologizes, from beside the biggest cake Jaune’s ever seen. “I think you might’ve overheard me and Oscar talking earlier and-”

Everything slots into place. The whispering, the planning, wanting to keep him away, not including him in the process, Ren’s key involvement (That cake could only have been made by him), wanting to help him adjust. It was all just them doing… this.

There’s a pile of presents, each wrapped individually and labeled with Yang’s scrawl and Blake’s tidy printing. A banner hangs overhead with “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!” written on it in block letters, and the last few letters of birthday are all smushed at the end. The cake is iced yellow with the double crescents of the Arc crest emblazoned at the top.

And his friends. His friends. All working together for a week to do this, for him, and he can feel his heart tight in his chest, and gods dammit here come the water works. How could ever think they hate him while they were doing this for him??

His friends are alls taring at him anxiously, and he realizes they think he doesn’t like it.

“I love you guys,” he sobs, and holds his arms out for a hug.

They all surge forward and sink to the floor. Oscar tucks himself under one arm, Ruby under the other. Weiss, Blake, and Ren curl around his sides. And on top of it all he can feel Yang and Nora’s exuberance.

They don’t hate him. They don’t hate him. Gods, how could he ever think they hate him?

In the middle of the hug huddle (Hud? Huggle?) Jaune frowns. “Wait… is it my birthday?” he asks nobody in particular.

He can feel someone adjust against his chest. “Course it is,” he feels Oscar’s voice hum through him. The pod loosens so his baby brother can look up at him, and Jaune ducks to avoid his discerning gaze. 

“I…” Jaune swallows, and finds that he’s looking right at Ruby. She looks gentle, understanding, and when he glances around he sees the same warmth on all of his friends’ faces. He swallows. No more bottling things up. “I forgot,” he admits.

“You forgot it’s today?” Emerald asks, and of course, she’s sitting cross-legged just outside of the slowly detaching hug pile.

“I forgot it entirely,” he says quietly, and he feels Oscar tuck into his side, and Jaune wraps an arm around him without even looking. “There wasn’t any reliable way to count days after so long, and even if there was… the days just weren’t consistent.” Time flowing away like sand in a shattered hourglass. Days that last minutes, nights that last days, days that last months, nights that last seconds. He shrugs. “So I just… forgot. I forgot a lot of things.”

“You didn’t forget us,” Nora reminds him, thudding her head down on his shoulder.

“I couldn’t let myself,” he says. “You guys…” Jaune takes the time to look them all in the eye. “Knowing I’d eventually get back to you all is all that kept me going.”

“Well, if you forget again, if you fall again… we’ll catch you,” Ruby says simply. “Me, Ren, Nora, all of us. And if that’s not enough, and you forget, and you lose yourself…” She swallows, and Jaune’s suddenly quite certain that he’s not the only one on the verge of tears. “Then we’ll just find you and show you who you are.”

“A million bajillion times,” Nora agrees, muffled against his chest.

“As many times as it takes,” Ren nods, and the others all murmur their assent. And Jaune’s heart swells with love for these people who have walked through hell, and who he would walk through hell for, and who would walk through hell for him.

The presents could be bricks and the cake could be sawdust and he wouldn’t care. This, these friends holding him in their arms… this is the only thing he could have ever wanted for a birthday he forgot but they remembered.

Love.

[bambisspeckles]

Disasterology {BD!Simon}

Chapter Two: Who We Are

*pics for aesthetic purposes only

CW: simon is here (yay!), duel pov, insecurities (simon and reader), angst, allusions to depression, bad scottish slang (sorry johnny ilysm), probable inaccurate representation of the military (i'm tryin), mentions of terminating pregnancies, simon is a supportive king, general angsty emotions (it's not too bad imo), bad british slang (what can I say I'm american), mildly edited! lmk if i missed anything <3

WC: 2.2K (oopsie!)

Summary: You finally tell Simon you're pregnant and his reaction isn't what you expect. Now the both of you have to try and navigate this new normal, and your new strange relationship.

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In the following days since your appointment you've had some time to think. Simon has been out on deployment for a couple weeks and according to him, through sparse communication, he's supposed to be deployed for a couple more. That gives you enough time to gather your thoughts, somewhat anyways, and figure out how to tell him.

You decide not to mention anything to him while he's away, but Simon isn't stupid and he knows something is up. He's asked you, practically begged you, to tell him what's up, but no matter how much he asked you always ended up brushing him off, telling him it's nothing to worry about. At a certain point he just kind of stopped asking, a common game between the two of you. The obgyn's office had called you back a few days after your initial appointment about your results in regards to your bloodwork.

Unsurprisingly your bloodwork had confirmed you're pregnant too.

At this point in time your fear and emotional pain had faded and you just became kind of, numb. You didn't have time to be scared, not right now anyways. You went to have a follow up appointment with Doctor Green, just a general assessment of your health and the baby's health. She had told you you're about four, almost five weeks along in your pregnancy. The thought had your stomach churning around a bit.

Now that you've had a pregnancy conformation appointment and a follow up appointment you had enough medical 'evidence' to show Simon when he got back. Just in case he didn't believe you, just in case he tried to deny what you tell him. Honestly you don't know if you could handle that. You feel bad, guilty even, you know it's not really your fault you're pregnant, but jumping him with such a serious situation once he gets back feels almost selfish to you. Though you won't admit it aloud, there's also a part of you that feels relived at the thought of finally getting to tell him, even if his reaction is bad, at least it won't be weighing on your conscious any longer.

You don't want him to react badly though, you hope he won't.

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Simon hadn't felt a dread like this in a long time. He's been away for a few weeks at this point and he doesn't know if he can handle being away from you any longer. Not now anyways. He's noticed a shift in you, in your behavior, you're hiding something from him and it's making him sick to his stomach. Maybe you're breaking things off, maybe when he gets back you'll tell him you can't do the weird song and dance that happens between the both of you and that you want nothing to do with him.

Or maybe you'll tell him you've found someone else, someone who will give you all the time and energy that you want and need, that the weird vagueness of the relationship you have together has pushed you into the arms of someone else. He wouldn't blame you if you left, he knows that you want to settle down, that you want to settle down with him, and he knows the fact that he won't is starting to pull the two of you apart.

He groans softly into the darkness of the safehouse. He misses you, his sweet girl, his sweet girl whom he selfishly clings to. He's worried you'll leave and he has no right to be, he doesn't deserve you, he doesn't deserve to call you his.

"Lt?" Soaps voice rumbles through the darkness. "Ye alrigh' Lt?"

"M' fine Johnny, why are you up?" Simon's voice comes out more agitated than he meant.

"Aye, no need tae bare ye claws Lt. S' my turn tae take watch." Johnny holds his hands up in surrender, even though he's sure Simon can barely see him do it.

Simon lets out a deep sigh, his hands dragging down the fabric of his skull print balaclava.

"My bad Johnny, S' a little stressed is all. It'll work itself out m' sure, don' worry." The way he speaks convinces neither him nor Johnny that he believes what he's saying.

"Is it ye bird?" Johnny says quietly as he sits down on the fold out chair next to Simon, not wanting to wake the others.

"She's not my bird, dunno' how many time I gotta say that." Simon rolls his eyes as Johnny lets out a chuckle.

"Ye say she's not, but I ken the ye look at her Lt. Not foolin' anyone, even Captain' Price as' mentioned it." Johnny eyes follow Simon's hands as he lights a cigarette. "Tell me what's wrong with ye Lt."

Simon takes a drag out of his cigarette, blowing out the puff of smoke before speaking again, the need for sleep and rest thick in his voice.

"I thin' she want's to leave, been actin' strange she but won' talk to me…" He tilts his head back as he speaks.

"Dinnae wan' her tae leave do ye?" Simon shakes his head. "Then don't let the lass go." Johnny stands up from the chair, slapping Simon on the shoulder strongly before picking up his gun and walking outside to take his post.

God he hates when Johnny is right.

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Your stomach is churning. Simon had flown back in a couple days ago and had some things to take care of on base but he assured you that he'd seen you soon, and fuck you didn't realize how soon, 'soon' actually was. A few hours ago your phone a chimed and a notification from Simon had popped up, the message short enough to reveal itself on your lock screen.

"Home soon. Be there in a few hours".

That message had brought back every feeling of fear and dread that you had been pushing deep down within these last few weeks. His message hit you like a fucking freight train, he was back, he was here, and now you have to face reality and tell him you're pregnant. Pregnant with his kid. It was scary, so god damn scary. Your hands were shaking wildly and in order to keep from passing out you forced your body to pace back and forth in your small apartment.

He'd be here any minute. Within the next hour you could lose him, your desperate and selfish hold on him all being in vain because he might just leave anyways. All those months of settling and ignoring the desperate tugging feeling of heart, it's all about to be thrown in the trash. What will you do if he leaves? What will you do if he doesn't? Every single suppressed notion coming to smack you in the face.

A soft thud brings you out of your spiral, but it's not just a thud. It's a knock. A knock at your door. Simon is here, outside of your door, waiting.

Fuck.

You walk over to the door with unsteady legs, your sweaty hands shaking on the knob as you pull the door open. On the other side, as expected, was Simon, a look of worry written on his face. You can't blame him, if you had been on his end of this you'd be worried too. Things were about to get a whole lot worse, for the both of you.

"Hi." You wheeze out.

"Hi sweetheart…" There's a long pause as he awkwardly stands in your doorway, mindlessly shifting on his feet. "Are you okay? You look sick…"

You are sick, you think. You're worse. You don't dare say that though, not yet.

"I'm.." You drag out the word for a painfully long time before swallowing thickly. "I need to talk to you actually.." You notice how he grows even more stiff at your words.

There's a part of you that desperately wants to offer him comfort, to tell him it's nothing serious and that everything's alright. Unfortunately, as unfair as it is to the both of you, you can't give him that reassurance. All you would be doing then is lying. Instead you move out the middle of the doorway and gesture for him to come inside. He obliges, nodding softly at you before dragging his feet inside your flat.

"Do you.. do you want a drink?" You'll need one, is what you want to follow up with.

"No." His answer is short and gruff, the way it always is when he's shutting down, when he's anxious. His eyes follow your figure as you place a teabag into a hot cup of water, presumably making a drink for yourself.

He walks over to a small coffee table and sits down, the chair dragging across the floor before his comically large figure restlessly tries to settle into it. You take the seat across from Simon, your thumbs fiddling together where they meet on the mug. There's a long beat of silence as Simon waits for you to speak, his dark eyes scanning every micromovement you make.

"Sweetheart, wha's wrong? Why ave' you been actin' so strange?" You can tell there's more he wants to ask, wants to say. If only you knew what it was, if only you could coax the words out of him yourself.

"Simon… I-" You pause, taking a deep, labored breath, while fidgeting with the teabag in your cup for a few moments.

"I'm pregnant Simon."

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Out of all the things Simon 'Ghost' Riley expected to be told by you once he got back, you being pregnant was not one of them. Your words send him into a complete state of shock, and if it weren't for the sharp, short breaths he was releasing every so often, you might've thought the news killed him. You're staring at him expectantly, you want him to say something, react in some way, any way, but all he can do is stare at you with big, dumb, wide eyes.

"Are you going to say something?" Simon can see how fearful you are for his reaction but even then there's a bite in your voice. You're desperate for him to do something.

After a few more moments of Simon pathetically floundering around every word known to him in his head, he can finally string together a sentence.

"Is it mine?" Wrong thing to say Simon. Your face scrunches up unpleasantly and you throw him a nasty, teary-eyed glare.

"Of course the baby is fucking yours Simon!" The way you speak is exasperated. "I'm not going out whoring myself around to anyone with a dick!"

"I'm not sayin' you are I just-" You angrily cut him off, tears beginning to roll down your cheeks.

"Is that really the first fucking thing you say? The only thing you're fucking worried about?" He cringes in response to your words, he didn't mean for it to come out sounding as bad as it did.

"No, no. Of course not, I didn't mean to insinuate anything sweetheart, you know I'd never do that." His response seems to calm you down a bit, well as calm as you can be right now, because that fury in your eyes burns out.

There's more silence, more staring. Neither of you know what to say or what this means. What to do. Simon is once again the one to break the silence, clearing his throat lowly before speaking once more.

"Are you… keeping it?" He immediately winces at his wording, mentally kicking himself for referring to a, possible, future human as 'it.'

"The baby I mean," He clarifies. "Are you keeping the baby?"

"I don't know." The way you answer so helplessly has his heart clenching.

"I'm scared Simon. I don't know what I want or what to do and-" Your tears start to fall again. "And I can't do this all alone…"

Simon's heart fucking breaks. Alone? Did you not want him part of this? Or even worse did you think he was just going to up and leave you? Simon may be a bad man, a cruel man even, but he'd never leave you. Not now, not like this.

"You don't have to do it alone…" The words coming out uncharacteristically soft from him. Your eyes flick up to meet his. "No matter wha' you choose I'll be here to support you." He sees some of the tension leave your shoulders at that.

"Maybe, but even then, no matter what I do things will change." Your hands come up to wipe the remaining tears off your face.

"If I keep the baby we'll be in some weird co-parenting relationship and you'll have a kid you never even wanted, but if I don't have the baby then…" Your voice trails off.

"Then wha'?" His deep voice speaking the words gingerly.

"I don't know Simon… I'd like to sit here and pretend that we'll figure things out but it's complicated both ways. We're not even together now and we're just supposed to have a baby? I mean you don't even want kids! There's just so much to consider and it's all so much. I don't-" Simon reaches across the table to lay his hand over yours, the rough, calloused feeling of his fingers causing you to pause.

"We will figure it out." There's an assured air to his words, though neither of you entirely believe them.

You let out a shaky breath as your gaze meet his, your lashes clumped together and your eyes red and swollen.

"Okay."

─── ⋆⋅𐀔⋅⋆ ────── ⋆⋅𐀔⋅⋆ ────── ⋆⋅𐀔⋅⋆ ────── ⋆⋅𐀔⋅⋆ ──────

I genuinely loved writing this part!! i tried to write a lot from simon's pov because he wasn't really in the first chapter and I felt bad LMAOO!! I really hope you enjoyed this chapter my loves :3 Likes and reblogs are appreciated asss always and thank you for your support! I love you, kisses, mwah mwah <3

[pharawee]

It's Friday Sunday, and that means it's time for more omegaverse shenanigans. 🥳

Sadly, this will be my last Pit Babe novel commentary post for a while because the main story only has 25 chapters. But worry not! Apparently there's a few extra chapters and if anything significant happens you'll be the first to know (but don't be surprised if it's just chapter upon chapter of kinky sex - that's just how Daddy and Papa Charlie and Babe roll).

If you want to catch up, you can find parts 1, 2, 3 & 4 here.

As for this part - expect major spoilers, shenanigans (both omegaverse and not), family reunions, family reunions... and fun card games. But more on that later.

For now, let's get back to Babe, who's apparently rich enough to own a white Ferrari. Show-off. He's currently on his way back to Khun Tony, and he's such a brat about it that he fools the guards into letting him through. Things escalate from there. Babe threatens to bring Tony to justice once and for all, to which Tony reacts with mild bemusement. He's no longer interested in Babe since he's lost his powers, and he even taunts him with Charlie's (supposed) death. No, Tony didn't want Charlie dead. He merely wanted to incapacitate him in order to bring him back home (because car accidents are such a precise science...). It's a pity that Charlie died but, really, at least he's free now. Or something.

This man must have stupid amounts of money to throw at all of his plans because, quite honestly, they're shit. Oh well, at least we know where Way learned his... well, unnecessarily long-winded (TEN YEARS!!) ways.

Babe has heard enough but sadly Kenta steps in before he can get his hands on Tony. This leads to more taunting and the appearance of Way, who casually slings Babe over his shoulder and forcibly removes him from the premises. Which leaves the guards like, "who tf even was that weirdo?" Oh, to be a guard in Khun Tony's employment...

(photoshop is my passion)

Meanwhile, Charlie (alive and, uh, relatively well) is still busy having his stolen powers exorcised by Babe's long-lost dad (the real one this time). The more he uses a particular ability, the longer it takes to meditate out of him. No, seriously, Reval and Charlie are basically just sitting in a room mind-palacing the powers away. Apparently it's very draining.

They also talk about Charlie's guilt, and how he believes it's best to stay away from Babe as not to hurt him again. Sure, he could leave the final decision to Babe but even that, he fears, might be selfish of him as that leaves Babe with the burden of having to decide in the first place. No matter what he does, it will cause Babe both happiness and pain - just like when Charlie's initial selfishness brought him closer to Babe and then almost drove him away entirely. Charlie's mind is going in circles. He's so protective of Babe that he doesn't realise - no matter his intentions, no matter his inaction - he can't untangle himself from the hurt he's already caused and will cause going forward.

Oh, and by the way? That moment when Charlie "died" in the hospital and Babe thought he was getting his powers back and had to listen in on every excruciating detail of Charlie's body shutting down? Yeah, turns out that was Charlie causing (mass) hallucinations and slowing down his body functions. Poor Alan had to go identify Charlie's body in the morgue while Babe was in such a bad way that he basically stopped functioning.

I've said this before and I'll say it again: what the hell, Charlie, you positively traumatised the poor boy. Could you maybe have kicked the bucket a little less dramatically? Did you really have to enact all of Babe's worst nightmares to make it more convincing? Just because you mean well (and didn't do it over the span of TEN YEARS for weird omegaverse breeding purposes) doesn't make it all right.

But more on that later.

Babe has made his way to a safe house. There, he meets Pete - the oldest of Tony's sons and currently AWOL, same as Babe. Pete is adorable, all sunshine and puppies and right-hand man of a local mafia boss. Or something. Because, you see, Pete figured out early on that the only way to leave Tony was to seek the protection of someone even worse. So he started working with the mafia, as you do. Apparently, he's so good at his job that he's convinced them all to go straight. Now he's studying to become a doctor. Oh, and also planning Tony's demise by preparing a really effective presentation.

That's where Babe comes in. Him visiting Tony's mansion was all a distraction - a sleight of hand, if you will. Even though he complains about Way manhandling him (Pete offers to get him a masseuse for the pain) it was all part of their plan:

While Babe distracted the guards by making a big stink, Way snuck into Tony's evil room of plotting (or something) and stole all of his evil data. When he later dragged Babe outside, he used the opportunity to slip the data stick into his pocket. On it there's evidence of all of Tony's evil business transactions. It would be easy to give it to the police, but Pete cautions against it. The evidence would simply vanish - something that has apparently happened many times before. Instead, Pete plans to reveal all of Tony's evil deeds in a way that makes it impossible for anyone to ignore.

We cut to Charlie and Babe sharing a cute moment. Wait, what?

"I've never loved anyone this much before." Babe's voice was soft, as if he didn't really want to accept reality, but he couldn't help but share those feelings with [Charlie]. "I'm afraid that if I love you too much, it will make you uncomfortable. [...] I'm afraid I can't love you as well as you love me."

Is it a dream? A memory? A (shared) vision? Whatever it is, before Babe wakes up from it, he and Charlie share some fundamental truths about themselves. About how Babe doesn't really know how to act now that he's in a relationship because he's never been allowed to be in love. About how he feels vulnerable and unsure, afraid of taking too much instead of giving back. But Charlie reassures him that he likes Babe just the way he is. He feels very loved, and anyway, he's also never loved anyone before so it's not like he has any grounds for comparison.

Meanwhile, Charlie also just woke up. He's given away the last of his powers and he's very exhausted. Jeff is with him to keep him company. Outside, it's just stopped raining. The rain makes Charlie think of Babe because it accompanied them throughout their relationship: when they argued, when they fought, and when they first became boyfriends.

"And the first day you became a normal person, it also rained," Jeff added with a small smile [...]. "But you couldn't see it in time. Only I saw." "Yes, when I woke up, the rain had already stopped." "Maybe that's a good sign." "A good sign?" "Yes," the young man nodded lightly. "Because the rain has stopped. [...] The sky is clear now."

What is this? Allegory? In my omegaverse novel??

There's always been a shadow hanging over Charlie and Babe's relationship - heavy and dark like a rain cloud, constantly reminding them of their past, their powers and the lies it took for them to even meet. Charlie has worked hard to rid them of their powers, and Babe is busy taking action against Tony. Maybe honesty and trust are all that stand in the way of them getting their happily ever after...

Until then, all they have is last night's dream, because as it turns out Charlie shared Babe's vivid memory. Babe's powers were the last to get exorcised and perhaps it created a momentary psychic bond between them. You never know with these omegaverse x-men.

What follows is the moment we've all been waiting for: the grand finale. The Ides of... whatever month this is but I hope Khun Tony gets stabbed to death by all of his adopted children. Et tu Way!

Meanwhile, Khun Tony is throwing a party. And by party I mean a human trafficking auction where he sells off some of his beloved children to fellow rich people. Charming. Why bother with a plan at all? Why not set everything on fire?

Right, because Pete really, really wants everyone to see his presentation.

Currently, Babe is disguising himself as a waiter. We all know waiting (and retail) staff are invisible to most people so no one recognises him except for one lone guard who's so smitten that he asks Babe out on a date.

Pete is also in disguise while Way pretends to be a good son and accompanies Tony for some good old-fashioned evil mingling. Their plan is to disrupt the auction and reveal all of Tony's illegal machinations.

This is a very questionable idea because I don't know about you but if I was at an auction trying to buy a child I'd probably not care if the auctioneer was evil. I'd probably ask for a slice of the evil pie.

Just as Babe is about to set their plan in motion, he's interrupted by Kenta. Uh-oh.

But, much like Pete and Way, Kenta too has had enough of Tony and was just waiting for the perfect moment to act. He assures Babe that he won't interfere. In fact, it was him who let Way into Tony's evil room of plotting to gather all of the incriminating info on him. Et tu Kenta!

"About helping you guys, this is a personal matter. [...] I have a brain, I can think for myself, and I know what to do. [...] But not everyone has many choices. Especially me. I can't make the same choice as you. [...] So, this is the best I can do. [...] You can handle the rest yourself, right?"

And so, Kenta leaves this story (presumably with some of Tony's financial assets) never to be seen again. What a shame. Kim's existence in the series will hopefully fix this.

Meanwhile, the auction is about to begin. I mean, the... uh, fundraising for poor, underprivileged children who also happen to have powers. Everyone's delighted - except for the poor kids who are led on stage one by one and then sold off like priced cattle. The thought alone makes Babe sick. Would the same have happened to him if he hadn't run away that day (no Babe, I thought we had established that you'd have been part of the breeding program...)?

And now, after having watched episode 5 of the tv series, I wonder if this is where the plot will lead us in lieu of the omegaverse plot. Tony mentioned an auction. I wonder if his goal is to sell Babe (and any other of his adopted children) for profit.

Anyway.

Babe's thoughts are cut short by a guard patrolling in front of Pete and his hiding place. Babe decides to check things out but he's quickly overwhelmed by the much stronger guard. He starts choking Babe and things almost go from bad to worse until someone unexpected comes to Babe's rescue.

That someone is Charlie - and there's a short, sweet and intense reunion between them that proves all of his fears wrong:

"I'm sorry." "It's okay," Babe let go of the hug and immediately responded without stopping for a second, his palms framed the other man's cheeks, before kissing his entire face: his forehead, nose, cheeks and lips. "It's okay, Charlie. Really, it's okay." The beautiful alpha hugged the tall young man again while repeating "It's okay" over and over again until the listener felt guilty.

Well, that was easy. But more on that later.

Charlie, Babe and Pete quickly catch up and then join forces. Pete is amazed that Charlie gave up his powers to escape Tony's clutches, going so far as to even fake his death to protect his loved ones. He's also amazed that he'd even dare come here - powerless and without a nifty presentation.

(And also, how does this whole having no powers thing even work? Did Reval - and in turn Charlie when he stole Babe's powers - rewrite Charlie's whole dna? Because how else would that even affect Tony's evil breeding program? And why am I so concerned about the specifics of omegaverse shenanigans? For all I know none of these characters even know or care about dna.)

It's quickly decided - probably due to Charlie's lack of nifty presentations - that they'll continue following Pete's plan. But wait, where is Jeff? There's no way he'd have let Charlie come here on his own!

Back at the auction, another child is led onto the stage to be sold. It's none other than Jeff. The auction grinds to a halt while Tony attempts to save face. This leaves Jeff with enough time to introduce himself and his powers. His name is Jeff, he's a 20-year-old omega and he can see the future.

"In no more than ten minutes, everyone in this room will have the same future." Jeff looked around the room with a bright smile before saying his next sentence which made the entire meeting room fall silent. "That is, death." The little Omega smiled broadly as if his own prediction was very pleasant.

I love Jeff so much. Make them suffer!

He then adds that there's a bomb hidden in the building and it will go off if even one person attempts to leave. Who even needs nifty presentations when you've got... Oracle Omega (no seriously, this is what the novel - or rather, the machine translation - calls him. Maybe it's his code name).

Everyone is then forced to watch Pete's presentation. I really, really hope it looks something like this:

I'm not joking, it has talking cartoon dogs. Interactive talking cartoon dogs overlaid with incriminating voice files of Tony.

Turns out Tony's guests are okay with human trafficking and buying children but they draw the line at violence and murder embezzlement. Everyone is all shocked and clutching their pearls and secretly very glad that their names don't come up in this weird cartoon dog powerpoint presentation.

Tony's acting all cool until the cartoon dogs reveal that this presentation is broadcast live and for everyone to see - this includes live footage of the auction.

But it's never too late to fix your past mistakes so Tony draws his gun on Jeff because he would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for you meddling kids!

Luckily, Way quickly intervenes before Tony can fire his gun, but even though Tony's many guards are somewhat suspicious of a little guy with a bomb and someone who hypnotises people for a living, they're quickly overpowered. In the control room above, Charlie, Babe and Pete don't fare much better.

Everything seems lost until there's a loud crash.

It's Alan in a black supercar and he's crashed through the doors leading to the auction hall.

They're on the second floor (it is sadly later revealed that Alan didn't drive up the stairs - the car was already parked in front of the doors because this is what rich people do to impress other rich people, I guess).

But Alan isn't alone. He's brought several other racers, among them Six (Babe's old rival who was probably turned into either Kim or Winner in the series). Six is a powerful alpha who can cause mass hallucinations that are so strong that they're banned by law.

Yeah.

Tony's guards are going down!

Meanwhile, Tony has had enough. He locks down the whole mansion so no one can escape. Charlie, Babe and Pete make their way up to the roof because there might be a skylight without security doors. They have guns, the many guards have guns, but it's okay because this is where Pete enigma powers come in.

You see, Pete has super control over his whole body, meaning that he never misses a shot.

I guess this explains this bit in the series (except for the part where the arrows are all over the place). But also congrats to Way for his future boyfriend with amazing body control.

While Pete is busy being awesome, Charlie and Babe lament the fact that they're probably going to die here when there's so much sex still to be had. :((((

Things are looking dire indeed. They're surrounded and out of bullets. One of the guards takes aim at Babe but before the bullet can hit him Charlie intervenes by jumping into its path. Miraculously, he's okay.

But that's because a few steps away Way has also jumped into the bullet's path and it's hit him instead. Babe is in shock. He hates Way for what he's done but in a way he's still his best friend. While Alan unsuccessfully tries to stop the bleeding Babe comes closer:

"Babe…" Way's dry voice called out his name as soon as he knelt beside him. "This is all I can do." Babe was silent, he just stared at his former best friend's face, tears flowing silently, without him even realizing it. "I know whatever price I pay, it probably won't be enough. But this is all I can do." Way's voice is very soft, as light as his breath. "…. I'm sorry for being a friend like this.."

And then he dies. Babe is inconsolable, sobbing and tightly hugging Way's lifeless body. He's still angry with Way, and he'll never forgive him for what he's done, but he didn't want him to die.

They better change this whole part in the series or I'll riot. I watched Nut Supanut die once in Something in my Room and I still haven't recovered.

Their victory is overshadowed by Way's death. Tony is apprehended alive and taken into custody. His evil alpha trafficking and breeding program is no more.

A little while later, Charlie finds Babe sitting alone in the mansion's garden. They talk, and Charlie apologises once more for letting Babe believe that he was dead. If Babe wants him to, he will disappear from his life and even stop racing cars so that they'll never have to meet again. This is all he can do: give Babe the freedom to decide for himself. But Babe only asks him if he truly wants to leave, and of course Charlie doesn't. And that's that. Babe has made his choice. He has decided long ago that he wants Charlie in his life.

Their long-lasting painful lives ended in the garden of the mansion that raised them to grow up like caged animals, allowing them to meet and fall in love. Today, everything has ended. It ended with the falling rain washing away their blood stains, sweat and tears, as well as a sweet kiss that he had been thinking about for a long time, making him feel able to stand in the rain without feeling afraid.

Oh, the rain allegory (and also oh, the bad machine translation)!

The novel ends quietly with Way's funeral, eerily similar to Charlie's fake funeral a few weeks prior. It's attended by the same handful of people. Even the clothes they wear are the same (which is convenient, I guess, but also... ouch!). Despite his many wrongdoings, people loved Way - and this includes Babe. And as it turns out, it was Way who got rid of whoever caused Babe's racing accident. He never told anyone about it.

Babe stays behind with Charlie and mourns his friend. He recognises that his feelings of friendship and betrayal are both valid and important (and later on it's established that Babe actively works on processing his traumatic experiences with the help of medication and therapy - and you know, I really appreciate the novel's nuanced approach to a character's mental health. It's an incredibly rare thing to see in Thai BL and an even rarer thing in most kinky stories). He won't forgive Way but...

"In the next life, please be kind to me. Don't deceive me again [...] Be a good friend, idiot!"

Which is as much of a peace-offering as anyone can hope for - wishing to meet each other again in the next life under better circumstances. Negl, I teared up because it's such a bittersweet thing to say. 😭

Meanwhile, Alan and Jeff have gone ahead and are talking in the car. Their ending is vaguely romantic (with their growing relationship hopefully developing further in the bonus chapters) but for now, all Alan asks of Jeff is to accept him in his heart as his brother. Please, don't phi nong me, novel!

And because this is Pit Babe the novel, we get one last drawn out sex scene that consists of Charlie trying to cheer Babe up by suggesting a game of naughty cards. A bit like strip uno, I guess. Naturally, Babe wins, but Charlie is allowed to leave his glasses on - and wear nothing but an apron while he gives Babe the bestest and longest and absolutely mindblowing (yes, there's a lot of blowing too) dicking of his life. Babe, my man, enjoy. You truly deserve it.

The End.

No wait, the novel actually ends with Babe and Charlie racing again for this year's title of King of the Hollow. Charlie is very skilled now, and it's very close but I'm relieved to say that Babe's experience and talent isn't all for nothing and OF COURSE HE FUCKING WINS.

The End.

Hold on, wait. I forgot about the part where Charlie takes Babe to see Reval - his real father. And of course Babe forgives him and it's all very sweet and they live happily ever after.

THE END. For real this time. Except for the bonus chapters. And unless the mpreg happens there (I mean, Jeff and North are technically available...), that's it for the omegaverse shenanigans.

When I first started writing these commentary posts I never thought they'd become so detailed and long - or that people would actually be interested in reading them. Thank you so much to everyone who left replies and tags. Sharing the insanity and reading everyone's reactions was honestly the best part of it all. May Pit Babe the series treat us kindly, and may none of us ever pop up in a cartoon dog powerpoint presentation. 🙏

[vulpixisananimal]

A-Side: Chapter 1

"Hey, Sif, Siffrin, Siffarooni."

(. . . It's Isabeau.)

(It's always Isabeau. Every night, it's Isabeau who wakes you up to tell you nothing much at all. But, the script demands it, you turn and listen.)

"Um, sorry? To wake you up? I just have to tell you something. If that's ok."

(It's not like you had a choice anyway. You nod. Go on, Isabeau.)

"Then I shall tell you this thing! This thing I woke you up to tell you-"

(You zone out. You don't know why you decided to go through the sleepover again, was it selfishness? You were selfish, Siffrin. It just wasted time, and it just hurt your heart.)

(How long had it been? You were loosing track of your loops, was it months? Years? You hope it wasn't years. How much would you need to go through before it's all done?)

(You keep zoning out thru when Bonnie throws their pillow. This part was funny, once. The banter between your family, the ominous threatening, Isabeaus smile-)

(You snap out of zoning out. You hear thunder.)

"Woah." (Mira says in a whisper.) "M-must be close. . ."

"Stupid crabbing thunder! We're trying to sleep!- Huh? 'Frin?"

(You had stood up. What. What what what. There was never thunder at this time! Never, never never!! You rushed to a window to look out.)

(It was storming, storming like it never had before.)

"What's up, Sif?" (Isa asks, concerned.) "Worried about the town?"

"Something's wrong." (You say, your breathing picking up.) "I-I, uh, I don't know but-"

[STARDUST]

(You wince, Loop?!? Loop what's- wait. You make the stupid hand sign Loop taught you, ignoring your family's looks of confusion.)

"Loop what's-"

[STARDUST, GET YOUR PARTY AND WAKE UP!! GET RUNNING!!!]

"I-I don't-"

[THE WORLD! IS! ENDING!!]

>>>

"Gems alive."

(You all rushed out of the clocktower, dressed and ready for anything. Your heart was beating our of your chest, what was going on?!? Was Loop ok?!?)

(The sky was cloudy and lightless, a level of lightless you'd never seen before! This, this couldn't be the end, right-)

"AAH!!" (Mirabelle shrieked.) "A S-SADNESS!!"

(You watch in confusion as a shadowy creature rises from the ground itself. It had antenae, sharp claws, and light-grey eyes. It's, what is that?!?)

"Weird looking sadness!" (Bonnie yells.)

(Odile analyses the enemy.) "It's not like any we've seen-"

(It lungest at your party, you move quickly and slice it in two, and it dissolves into shadow. It didn't feel like a sadness, it, it's wrong. You turn back to your family.) "Can't waste time! C'mon!"

"R-right!! We need to save the townsfolk!!" (Mirabelle agrees, everyone quickly following you to Dormont.)

(A hop, skip, and a jump and you were all back into town. Everyone was running about, more of those creatures were forming from the Darkness and attacking!! You run ahead and swipe at one that was about to hurt the frog-loving kid.)

"T-thank..." (They say meekly.)

(Mirabelle catches up with you, and addresses the kid.) "Go run to the library! We'll make sure everyone gets there, ok?"

(The kid nods, and runs off. Mirabelle turns to the rest of you.) "W-we, we should, we should make sure everyones safe, right? That was the right call, right???"

"It's a good call!! I'll help gather people!!" (Isa agrees.)

"Right, I'll make sure the Library's safe. Boniface, stick with me, please." (Odile adds.)

"Can I bonk one of those weird things???" (Bonnie says a bit too excitedly.)

"N-not now, Bonnie! Siffrin, can you help get people??" (Mira asks you. Was there any question?)

"Of course, I'll be fast about it, as always~" (You say cheekily.)

(You all split up, Mira, youself, and Isabeau looking for people to save. Odile and Bonnie to keep the Library safe.)

(You need to go see Loop.)

(You run through the town, striking at creature after creature, but with each one you slay two more take it's place!! You run past the Boulanger's, before you can stop it, one of the creatures strikes down the Big Boulanger. All you can do is slay the creature that did the deed, and tell the small Boulanger to run.)

(You run to the Favor tree. Loop's there, fighting off multiple creatures at once. You rush to help.)

(You strike at the creatures.) "LOOP!!! LOOP WHAT'S GOING ON?!?"

"STARDUST!!!" (Loop crushes a creature with a hand.) "What are you doing here!?! I told you to run!!!"

"I-I was worried about you!! We need to, t-to-"

"To WHAT, Stardust!!" (Loop snaps back.) "Can't you see!! The world is ending!!"

(You take towards them.) "L-Loop, Loop c'mon! Mirabelle is getting everyone together at the Library and-"

"What you want ME to be there?!?" (Loop laughs.) "Little old me at the END?!?"

"I-I-" (End of the world. It, it certainly felt like the end of the world. You could feel the earth rumbling, the storm getting worse.) "I, no!! I'm not arguing!! Come on!!!"

(You grab Loop by the arm and start dragging them, they don't resist-)

(-CRACK-)

(You trip, what?!? What was that noise?!? You turn around and, a-and.)

(The world was, litteralt falling apart. Breaking, Falling, Rotting. The land where you were standing and where Loop was standing were slowly drifting apart, Loops side was crumbling into bits. Looking around, looking down, it looks like, like stars. Like void.)

"LOOP!!" (You yell for your friend.) "LOOP MAYBE, M-MAYBE-"

(You watch as horror as the ground they're standing on crumbles into nothing. Your friend, your sponsor, your star, falls into the abyss that's forming all around you.)

(No, no no no no, no that, that, that can't be right, right? That, that can't be it?!? You quickly make the hand sign. You call for Loop.)

(You don't hear anything.)

(. . . . .)

(Keep it together Keep it together Keep it together Keep it together Keep it together Keep it together Keep it together-)

(You run back to Dormont. It's worse, it's so much worse here. Cracks where forming everywhere, the land was falling into nothingness. There where creatures everywhere. You could see Odile at the library door helping people in. Mirabelle stood at the foot of the Change God statue, fighting off waves of creatures, you run to help.)

"M-Mira!!"

"Sif!!!" (She yells, slicing a creature in two.) "W-what-"

"No time!! Where's Isabeau?!?" (You start hacking away at the dark creatures.)

"I-I don't know!! I thought, I thought he was with you!"

(Your heart drops, no, no not Isabeau. Stars, stars please not Isabeau too! No, this can't be happening. This, this is a nightmare!! A terrible, terrible nightmare that--)

(You feel a sharp pain in your side, a creature sliced you. No, no this isn't a nightmare.)

"S-Sif!!" (Mira runs over to you, healing at the ready.) "I-I'm sorry! I-I'm really, really sorry!!! I don't know, know, know where-"

(-CRACK-)

(You and Mirabelle turn, the piece of land with the Library had broken off from where you were. Odile was looking at you in horror, Bonnie was holding onto her leg for dear life.)

"M-MADAME!!!" (Mira screemed.)

"W-WE'LL BE ALRIGHT!!" (Odile yells.) "I'LL BE SURE OF IT!! WE'LL BE ALRIGHT!!!"

(No, no no no. You can see it already, the cracks were forming on their little island. You, you couldn't watch, you look away.)

(Mirabelles screams were all you needed to hear.)

(This can't be real. This can't be real This can't be real Loop back Loop back Loop back Loop back Loop back Loop back Loop back WHY AREN'T YOU LOOPING BACK!!!)

(Your stomach hurts.)

(Mirabelle collapses to the ground next to you, she's sobbing. You, you should, at least, try, try anything, anything anything anything!!)

(None of this was in the script.)

"M-Mira. . ." (You very, gently put a hand on her shoulder. Why, why did YOU need to be the stable one here!!) "I'm, I'm here, they'll, they'll be-"

"S-siffrin. . ." (She's, distraught.) "We, w-we've failed. We failed didn't we!! We failed and, a-and, a-and everything ending, and, it's all, all my fault!!"

"N-no! No we, we still, might have a chance, i-if-" (If you can go through a house that's currently crumbling into bits and beat the King? Not likely. Admit it, siffrin. You lost.)

(You scream as you feel a pain on your back. A creature had snuck up on you and struck you. You collapse to your knees, it hurt, it hurt so much-)

(You hear a swish, and a. . . Sparkle? Singing? And a gasp from Mirabelle. You look up.)

(Mirabelle had struck the creature that had attacked you, but, now in her hands was a weapon you'd never seen before. It was sleek and thin like a rapier, with thin strans of what looks like hair leading from it's tip to the wrist guard. As she swung it around to get a feel for the strange weapon, you could hear it sing, or talk, or just, make noise.)

"W-what is. . ." (She's as confused as you.) "I-it, it. . ."

"It's a gift, I bet." (You say, trying desperatly to lighten the mood. It was just the two of you here after all.) "What is it?"

"I-I, I don't know." (She swings it a few more times. It sings some more- actually, no! You could make out some of the things it's singing, or saying. "Storstorageroomroom." "Openphrase123." What? Mirabelle helped you to your feet.) "It, it feels strong though. And it reminds me of a violin, look! Horse hair!"

(Oh! Right! That's what you used to make musical instruments, right- WAIT NO TIME!!) "Maybe we can fix this! O-or-

(-CRACK-)

(For the third time you heared that sickening noise, this time, from above you. You and Mirabelle look up, your face drops.)

(It was a dark creature, one that was so, so much larger. It looked, looked like a nightmare.)

"Change. . ." (Mirabelle gripped her new weapon tightly as the thing landed on the ground in front of you. It was multiple stories tall, with evil looking eyes.) "S-siffrin, what, w-what do we do?!?"

"Fight." (You say, gripping your dagger close.) "It's, it's all we can do."

(You charge forward.)

(Balls of lightless mist erupted from the creatures chest, you dodged them effortlessly and striked its body. Once, twice three time!! You were sick of these blinding creatures!!! Just die!!!)

([Just attack])

"S-sif!!" (Mirabelle deflected one of the lightless balls with her new weapon, catching up and striking the creature.) "B-be careful! Please!!"

(You ignore her, stab! Stab! Stab stab stab!!!)

(The creature knocks you away like you were nothing. You fly back, right past the edge of the land you were fighting on. You stab the ground frantically to stop yourself from falling into the abyss bellow. No, nononono!)

"S-siffrin!!!" (Mirabelle started running to you, but was cut off by the creature.) "Sif!! Hold on I-I-"

(You try pulling yourself up. Don't look down, don't look down Siffrin. Just, just don't, don't. Look.)

(-CRACK-)

(Your heart stops.)

"SIFFRIN!!! NO!!!!!"

(Your falling. Everything, everythings turning dark. The world, the world is gone, being eaten, eaten by. . .)

(You feel a tug on your stomach.)

(You wretch. Nothing happens. You feel a tug, nothing happens. Again, again, again!!! You're breaking, you're falling, you're, you're-)(You're going to die.)

(This is it. The theater has burned down, with all the actors still inside.)

(You close your eyes. You hope you your death comes quick.)

----------

(In a far away town, a boy looks up to the night sky. And sees a star blink out.)

[Prev] [Masterpost] [Next]

[bloodyjuls-blog]

I was so stupid

Leah Williamson X Reader

⚠️ Warning ⚠️: part 2 of goodbye my lover. If you read it you know what I mean in case of not it's just pure angst. This seems to be the light at the end of the tunnel

Lucy POV

I woke up at 5 in the morning because I had to go to training at 8, I looked at my phone and realized that y/n had called me 3 times. I was quite worried because I was the only person (Ona too, but not at the same level of intensity) who had been with her in those difficult moments such as a divorce and the separation from her son. Little Sage who is such a sweetheart and Y/n too and now because of Leah's stubbornness they’re not together makes me quite angry.

I decide to call y/n back but she sends me to inbox, so weird. Yesterday I spoke to her and she told me that she was going through a bad time and that the pains in her chest had returned. Knowing that I am in Barcelona and she is in London makes me even more nervous because she could suffer a cardiac arrest and not have anyone to help her with it and now even less cause Leah apparently turned everyone against her. I don't understand.

Leah POV

*Beep beep beep*¨

Who in their right mind calls at 5 am on a Friday. “Hello” I said in a rather sleepy tone. Sage hadn't slept well, I felt him agitated. He always sleeps peacefully. “Hi Leah, I'm Lucy,” she tells me in a worried tone. “What's wrong Lucy? looks at the hours” I said calmly. “It's Y/N, I'm worried because she's been calling me in the early morning and I want to know how yesterday's conversation with her went?” she says worriedly. “Well, the talk has gone well, a bit of a farewell tone, but very normal. She also called me this morning too, although she seemed like drunk or drugged, her voice sounded very weird,” she says in a stern voice. “No Leah, how can you think that, she is doing those things that are on TV or in the gossip magazines. She is like this because the divorce and now you have left her without a job. Are you stupid or what?” Lucy says super angry. “Oi, calm down or I'll hang up on you, these are not the hours to argue, girl” I say calmly. “Leah, for God's sake, y/n could have suffered a cardiac arrest and you didn't even realize it, did your new girlfriend whitewash everything you felt for y/n? Have you realized how bad she has had it since she was kicked out of the club because of you and since it wasn't enough for you, you kicked her out of the house without even being able to take a jacket and her wallet, having to listen to her at 3 in the morning heartbroken because she doesn't know what she was going to do without you, you know that she has been living in a seedy hotel for 3 months since you kicked her out of the house? The sad nights when she misses her baby?…" Lucy says very seriously. "I'm sorry Lucy, I didn't know anything about that, I've been very selfish, but it all came down to me anyway, the absence, the times she ignored my presence and focused only on Sage, I've also missed her a lot, Lucy". I say in a worried tone. “Leah, I need you to go to The White Heart Hotel, which is 8 minutes from your house, ask the front desk for room 203 and make sure y/n is okay. Please". She says in a tone that I can't understand. "Okay, I’ll go now I’ll text you later" I say, worried but willing to collaborate.

"God y/n, I hope you're okay, damn it, why I didn’t pay you more attention, if something happens to you, I won't forgive myself" I say to myself.

Once I arrive at the hotel, which looks very seedy.

“Hello,” I ask at the reception, a little agitated. "Hello Miss. How can we help you,” the girl tells me without flinching. “Mmm yes, I'm coming to visit my friend y/n who is staying in room 203” I say nervously. “Miss Leah, I'm afraid that the guest Y/n was taken away by the ambulance a couple of hours ago, due to some cardiac incident, the poor girl was so young and had no one to help her at that time if not for the waiter who heard some noises, it's most likely that right now that girl was dead," the girl says sadly. "Excuse me? But she was fine yesterday when I saw her.” “Miss, I recommend you to go to the hospital where the ambulance took you and ask the corresponding questions there,” she says calmly. “Yes, of course, thank you very much anyway,” I say with a little emotion. “My poor y/n, how is this possible?” I sit in the car and tears come out of my eyes, I feel like the guiltiest person in the world. Instead of listening to her and being with her, the first thing I did is abandon her to her fate and if that's not enough, mess with someone who no matter how good person she is, is not y/n. The mother of my son, the love of my life. How stupid I am for God's sake.

Once at the entrance to the emergency room.

I get out of the car and look in the trunk for a facemask. “Damn, I had a box stored here” I say to myself, exasperated as I search through everything. “Here you are” I say, taking the mask under a pile of documents.

At reception

“Good morning miss, can I help you with something?” The nurse at the reception tells me. “Hey, a couple of hours ago an ambulance brought y/n Y/l/n here and I came to ask how she is” I say nervously. “Are you related to her?” she asks me, looking directly at the computer. “I'm her wife, Leah” I say, already stressed from so many questions. “I understand, at this moment, y/n is undergoing surgery due to a heart failure, if you wish you can wait in the coronary surgery waiting room on the 3rd floor and once the operation is finished a doctor will speak with you directly” she tells me. “Damn, well thanks, in the third one did you say?” I say worried. "Yeah".

It's been three hours since I've been here and the only thing that has changed is that a cardiologist has come to tell me that they are having complications with Y/N, and that her prognosis is reserved, that we have to wait and see how the surgery progresses.

Flashback

“Family of y/n y/l/n” a doctor comes out with a worried look. "Me, doctor, I am her wife, Leah Williamson" I say in a broken tone. “Well, Mrs. Leah, I will be very honest with you, at this moment we are performing a pericardiocentesis on Mrs. Y/n because after the cardiorespiratory arrest she suffered in the early hours of the morning we realized that she had cardiac clog, we have done this procedure several times because the patient keeps coming to a standstill and doesn´t come back. I would like you to notify her other relatives just in case. It should be said that the prognosis is reserved and her evolution will determine if the heart does not clog again, for now I will do everything in my power so that the lady does not die,” he says seriously. While he says that I try to process everything. There are possibilities that my love won’t make it and die, I must tell Lucia.

“Lucy, y/n she is dying, she has suffered several cardiac arrests since this morning and is in surgery she’s not recovering” I say between tears and sadness on the call. “Leah, don't be pessimistic. Ona and I will take the first flight there is to London, we will be with you” she says crying. I'm glad Lucy cares about y/n, they're like sisters from another mother. I settle into the chair and send a WhatsApp to Sophie.

To Sophie

Hey how are you? Sophie, did you leave Sage with my mother?

*Yes, as you told me. All good? *

No, something has happened, but first I must tell you that I can't take this anymore, you are a wonderful girl but I am not in the best place mentally. Sorry Sophie, it's better to leave things here.

*What a coward you are Leah, not telling me in person. Ok, I hope I never see you again*

A few hours later Dr. Flynn himself comes out.

“Leah, y/n she is out of surgery, her prognosis is still guarded but we believe she will make a successful recovery. What worried us most was that being so young and out of nowhere having these moments of trauma and even more so knowing that she has a healthy and fit life” he says less worried. “What exactly does she have? Will she be able to continue playing football? What will the recovery be like?” I said a mile an hour. “Miss, slow down please. Miss y/n will be in the coronary ICU for a while due to the sedation we gave her. What we watched in the echocardiogram, in the blood tests and the chest x-ray is an irregularity in her pericardium hence the surgery, but them also show cardiac arrhythmias which means that she won’t be able to practice any high impact sport, as Upon her recovery, her evolution will be marked by how her heart accepts the changes. Most likely, she will always have to carry oxygen and in the future we can consider the use of a pacemaker to help detect any irregularity. “I understand, can I see it?” I say a little more relaxed. “Of course, come with me here…”

To be continued

[zedif-y]

…Sometimes, Joel isn’t sure it’s worth it.

It being– well. Him. Which, bloody hell, that just sounds depressing, innit? He’s not– he’s fine, really, in all the ways that matter. Good looking, smart, humble. What’s not to love. He’s fine, great even, so there’s no need for any worrying. No need for that at all.

He just wonders, you know? Everyone does. (Probably.)

But also, he’s phrasing it weird. It’s not that he questions himself, it’s more like… Hm. 

Let’s use a metaphor, all smart-like. Joel thinks of himself as a lot of things: The howling, blood-hungry chase of wolves, the business end of a knife. That razor-sharp feeling of teeth sinking into flesh. A forest fire out of control.

(Yeah, yeah. He’s got issues, whatever.)

That’s not the point. The point is this:

Joel’s more of a hunter than the hunted. At least, that’s what he likes to think– don’t even argue. He knows he’s unhinged, revels in it, thrives in it. Hard to put out a fire without getting burned.

And that. That’s the thing.

Because Joel thinks that sometimes he burns too bright. Like a flame– no, like the sun. A point of pride on a good day, something to hide on the worse ones. Fire doesn’t get to keep things. It burns what it touches, spits out the remains. Charred and blackened and what-have-you.

The thing is he can’t make a home without smelling the faint scent of smoke, ash lingering in the air that makes him cough and wrinkle his nose. He builds a foundation, lays down the plans, thinking maybe, this time–

He’s always wrong. Stupid, stupid. He’s always blummin’ wrong.

The thing about Joel is he’s never held something that didn’t crumble into ash. The thing about Joel is that he doesn’t know when that’s gonna end.

So is it worth it, then? To be his? 

He knows the tight grip of loneliness, the heavy chains of solitude. He knows what it’s like to curl up on the floor with his dogs— don’t you dare laugh— his back screaming at him for the night spent on a cold floor. Loneliness is as familiar to him as bloodlust, but he’d rather rip out his teeth than admit it, swallow his own tongue.

(A thought comes, and it’s stupid– no, really. It’s stupid. Stop asking.)

(Why do people think the moon’s lonely? Joel wonders, a scowl on his lips. The moon’s got like, loads of friends. The stars are right there.)

(You get too close to the sun and your wings melt.)

(Joel tugs at a piece of loose string, and he thinks that maybe the sun just wants a friend.)

(…See, he told you it was stupid.)

Joel doesn’t want to be alone. Alone alone, not regular alone. Nobody does, okay? Sue him, it drove him mad.

Whatever. Whatever.

Joel doesn’t want to be alone, not again, not ever. But he gets close to people and it’s like he can just see them burn, wax pouring down their backs and plummeting to their deaths. He gets close, gets attached, and suddenly everything’s burning all over again, and all he can do is laugh and try to put it out as it sizzles at his fingertips.

Until everyone he loves is swallowed by the sea.

(Maybe a submarine, he thinks, eyes-wide and half-crazed. Maybe that’ll be safe, he should try that next game. He should.)

(Maybe’s better than nothing.)

So yeah, Joel wonders if it’s worth it, having anything at all. He wonders if it’s worth the effort, wonders if it’d hurt less to have nothing to lose– though he already knows the answer, and for goodness sake, he wishes it were different.

Joel sighs. This whole thinking thing is exhausting.

To be his is to burn. To reach out is to doom them. But Joel’s too selfish– too much, too bright, too hungry– not to do it anyway.

…Dammit, this got depressing anyway.

Joel swallows through the lump in his throat, and he reminds himself to breathe.

He’ll keep trying, is what he thinks in the end. He’ll keep trying. ‘Cuz what else can he do? Mope, cry about it? What other choice does he have?

Maybe one day he’ll make something, and he won’t have to see it be destroyed. Maybe one day he’ll go out peacefully.

Maybe one day people will stop making their wings out of stupid, meltable wax–

Yeah, okay. He’s getting sick of this metaphor too.

But like– he can’t help but think, you know, about that fall. About Icarus, and how he laughed as he fell into the sea. People say he was happy, even in the face of death, even as his wings burned and turned into soot.

A joy worth losing. A friend worth dying for. A home worth its destruction.

Tentatively, he lets himself think: That maybe, at the very least, that’s what it means to be his.

The thought makes him relax. (If only for now.)

…He hopes so. He really, really does.

[elsa-fogen]

Oh, Husk and Alastor?

Their dynamic is also pretty interesting, they kinda feel like two people who everyone thinks gets along great and are the best of friends. While in reality their friendship is fueled but a fire born from their hatred. They just have many decent moments and have a easy time understanding each other, through they often use that information to serve a selfish endeavor.

Like Alastor would mess with Husk, tease him and Husk would tell Al to get his act together so that he(Husk) doesn't have to deal with some sort of fallout (ref. when Mimzy comes by)

In general, I feel like they do get along really well, but they are in no way friends. Kinda like how you can get along well with your boss, but wouldn't really consider them a friend. And you wouldn't really want them to involve themselves in your life, but that doesn't stop Alastor. (Social conversions? What's that)

This also makes me curious, wonder what kind of dynamic Husk has with Rosie, or rather, how do you think Rosie sees Husk? Just like a pet Alastor has? Or does she actually see the person that is there? (Leaning more towards her not really seeing Husk more than a errand boy or pet of Alastor)

Though it would be fun if the first time Husk meet Rosie he thought that she might actually be willing to help him because she gives of the energy of being a very kind person around people she cares about (aka Alastor). So he tries to talk to her without Alastor present and he finally understands how they get along so well, they are both the same kind of crazy ᵔᵜᵔ

So, um- what are your thoughts on the dynamic between Alastor and Husk?

HEEEHEHHE YOU GOT ME A REASON TO TALK ABOUT MY FRESH HEADCANON ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIPS

OKAY SO!!

I saw a theory that Husk had children when he was alive. Keep that in mind, it's a secret tool we wanna use later

So, little bit about Alastor. He is not the guy who owns many souls. In fact, he doesn't own any (well... i have some headcanons, but it's for another time). The only soul he has is Niffty, and she's... she's whole another level.

So one day Alastor get's Husk's soul in posession and he has no idea what to do with him. Their contract is basically "you'll have to do anything i order you" but it doesn't set any boundaries for Husk. So he can insult Alastor, argue with him and so on. The only thing he cant is to try to kill Alastor, but it's obvious.

So, Alastor's just... drags him around, and Husk has to just be there all the time, and watch Alastor do stupid shit without thinking, being manipulated by Mimzy into some shenanigans and so on, because he's too powerful, kinda don't afraid of anything and little bit unhinged. And Husk is trying to be that voice of sanity for Alastor (and maybe Niffty). Like in canon, he tries to warn Alastor about Mimzy nd at some point seems genuinely worried about him. Just a bit. And also, in that scene in final song, when Alastor appears again, Husk doesn't seem happy but still goes for group hug.

I think he sees Alastor as a child he has to babysit, but the child is so spoiled, that he doesn't give a shit about his warnings. Maybe Al reminds him of his own children at some degree. And so Husk is attached to Alastor in some weird unhealthy way, he cares about him and tries to protect, even if it pointless.

The worst part of it is that Alastor doesn't see him more than funny fluffy cat-guy-pet. He almost never takes him seriously and doesn't listen to what he says. So Husk may try to reach out to Rosie, to make her to reason with Alastor. But she's basiclly "i could fix him, but whatever is wrong with him is way funnier". I think she listens to Husk's worries about another Alastor's scheme, but she also trusts Alastor? I mean, she belives that he'll be fine. But if something seems to dangerous, she can agree and talk to Alastor.

After all, Husk was an overlord, and i think Rosie could know him before he made a deal with Alastor. So, i think she doesn't think of Husk as just Al's pet, she knows who he is. After all, not every sinner can become an overlord. But still,

So, last thing. I saw that one comic where after episode 5 Alastor admits that Husk was right about Mimzy and i really love this thought. I think Alastor also likes Husk's presence at some degree. Maybe they could build something healtier, maybe Alastor, after losing part of his powers, would listen to Husk more. But still it's all fucked up while Alastor owns his soul.

And also, i'd really love to see something of just Alastor, Husk and Niffty getting into some shenanigans together, this would be so much fun. Al and Niff who are just 2 unhinged gremlins and Husk who's done with their shit, but still cares about them and can't just leave, and it's not because of the deal. Like i imagine when husk is trying to reason with Alastor that he's about do something stupid and dangerous and Alastor's like well i don't force you to follow us this time, but Husk still goes with them because who else would watch after these two idiots?

So i think, i get your point about them!

[multifandomfanficss]

You Look Like Shit

Adrian Chase/Vigilante x Reader

Adrian Chase Masterlist

Prompt: Adrian helps you calm down at the end of a stressful work week.

Warnings: Stress, a ridiculous amount of hurt/comfort

A/N: This is so so deeply self indulgent. If you know me and my real life no you don’t. Look away lol. Sorry if you see typos. This was barely proofread. Just a short little thing I wrote on a night where I had trouble sleeping. Crossposted on my AO3 adriansglasses.

You sat in the driver’s seat, dissociating, staring into space at your home through the windshield of your parked car. Eventually you blink, take a shakey breath, and get out of your car, slowly heading to the door.

“Babe, is that you?” You hear your boyfriend call from the other room.

“Yeah.” You force a response out, despite feeling like your energy is running on empty. You’d just worked a pretty tough night shift. Just standing up right felt like an impossible task.

“Hey have you seen my- woah… don’t take this the wrong way, but you look like shit.” Adrian says, stopping in his tracks to look at you. He’s half dressed in his Vigilante suit, but he’s missing the chest piece. You can barely focus your eyes on him.

“Two no call no shows, a regular call out, unhappy customers, screaming babies, and something in the back of my head is still worried that building is gonna blow up because we never figured out what that weird smell coming from the heater was a couple days ago. Not to mention one of the no shows was a friend and now it’s my job to find her and connect her with work because somehow some way they don’t have her fucking phone number.” You feel tears start to build in your eyes.

“Holy shit…” Adrian’s voice trails off.

“And if I wasn’t stressed enough I’m covering extra shifts left and right and I don’t even have time to prep for my supervisor interview next week for the promotion and I’m massively overstimulated and everything is just going wrong.” Your voice cracks.

“If they don’t give you that promotion they’re stupid.” He sighs.

“Can I please have a hug?” Your voice trembles as tears begin to fall.

“Come here.” He holds out his arms. As soon as you reach his arms you start sobbing, finally letting out the tears you were holding in all night, the tears your body wouldn’t let out before because it only feels safe enough to do this with Adrian when it’s so stressed. He pulls you close, giving you the pressure you crave. He runs his hand across your back slowly. Your mind tracks the calming repetitive motion. “I’m sorry you’re so stressed. You have every right to be, but you’re home now and I’ve got you. You don’t have to worry about anything right now.”

“But- but I- I can’t stop stressing! I can’t stop! Like what the fuck am I supposed to do?” Adrian notices as your breathing quickens. You’re struggling to keep it at its normal pace.

“Hey hey hey.” He shushes you. “Why don’t we go lay down? Let me take care of things for the night.” He suggests.

“But I thought you were going out.” You gesture to his suit.

“No, I don’t need to go out. Not when you need me here.” He kisses you on the forehead, starting to play with your hair.

“But the city needs you.” You don’t want him to go, but you don’t want to be selfish.

“No, my partner needs me. The streets have been quiet this week. P can handle it on his own and if he can’t he can call me.”

“I just don’t wanna fuck anything else up.”

“Look at me.” He separates from you enough so you can see his face. “You’re not fucking anything up. I’m choosing to take the night off because it’s pretty chill out there and quite frankly I deserve it and I’m gonna use that time to hang out with my awesome partner. You’ve been working your ass off. That place wouldn’t run without you. Just let yourself try to relax with me tonight. We both deserve it.”

“Are you sure?” You ask quietly.

“Positive.” He smiles at you. He leads you to the bedroom where he helps you get changed. He picks out more comfortable clothes for you, letting you wear his clothes because he knows you always prefer his shirts over your own.

“That’s better.” He smiles, kissing your forehead after you’re eventually cuddled up to him in bed for the night.

“I’m sorry for ruining your night.” You say, looking away.

“You didn’t ruin anything. I didn’t even wanna go out. It’s kinda cold. Plus who wants to kill criminals when I could be killing your bad vibes.” You laugh quietly.

“I love you so much.” You snuggle into him.

“I love you too, but you should try to get some sleep. You really need it. It’s not like you have to be anywhere in the morning. You can just rest. You don’t have work tomorrow.”

“Yeah, but I’m just so stressed about work. I don’t wanna sit here. What if something goes wrong? Not to mention, not setting an alarm just feels wrong. I keep thinking I’ll oversleep and miss work, but I don’t have work tomorrow.” He feels you tensing in his arms as you ramble.

“But you’re with me now, Sugarplum,” He reminds you. “and I wouldn’t let you miss work, so get that out of your head. I know it’s hard, but try to relax. Your body is stressed about things and it’s just creating more stress, but I’m literally gonna find a way to shrink down and go inside your brain and start hitting buttons like Inside Out to get you to stop. Actually, Chris told me there’s this guy called Batmite and he’s pretty small so maybe he could crawl through your ear-“

“Adrian!” You cut him off.

“Sorry I forgot that’s gross to you.”

“Ear stuff is gross to most people.”

“I think your ears are cute.” He smiles.

“I think you’re weird.” You giggle. “And cute.” You add. “Very, very cute.” You smile. You don’t know how even on nights like this he can make you smile. On nights when nothing feels right and the world is broken, Adrian is the only thing that makes sense to you.

“Well you’re way cuter.” He smiles.

“I’m so deeply in love with you.” You say what you’re thinking out loud.

“Well that’s a relief because I’m so deeply in love with you… and I’ll be deeply in love with you in the morning too. I’m gonna be here all night. I’m not gonna leave you- well… I might get up to pee, but that’s like a 2 minute side quest. Okay the point is, I want you to try to sleep.”

“Can you keep talking? I’ll close my eyes, but I really love your voice. It helps. Just until I fall asleep?” He smiles at your request.

“I’d talk all night if it helped. I’d talk until my voice box broke. I’d talk until I die.” He vows.

“Please don’t die. I just want you to talk long enough that I can stay calm enough to fall asleep.”

“I guess I can do that too, but where’s the challenge in that? I could tell you how much I love you in a million ways and it still wouldn’t be enough. It’s like those papers you wrote in detention where you have to write you’ll never do again what you did wrong like 100 times on a sheet of loose leaf… I guess I’ll start off by staying that you’re strong and I love you and I’m proud of you and that I’m happy you’re strong, but you don’t have to be so strong around me. You can let me take care of you. I’m here and you’re safe.”

Your eyes get heavy and you fade away to Adrian’s reassurances.

[yuridovewing]

okay so.

alderheart mouths off to a kittypet because he was being rude over him losing a toe. said kittypet jumps him for it, and sparkpelt rushes out to save him. you would think here that maybe alderheart has had some character development and maybe got the stick out of his ass and stops thinking that his sister breathes to spite him?

lmao of course not, he throws another hissy fit cause poor baby got emasculated.

“was she TRYING to rub it in???” she probably just doesnt want you to worry about her considering you got beat up.

how dare sparkpelt be concerned over her brother. what a selfish bitch. i bet shes only doing this for clout somehow. she CLEARLY concieved herself in squirrelflights womb alongside alderheart JUST to steal the spotlight and make him look like a pussy. what an inconsiderate bitch!

little side tangent, it’s quite interesting how sparkpelt was retconned into not wanting skyclan around and totally hating their guts and pushing for xenophobia and hatred when that 100% was not how she was in the first half of the arc. but alderheart’s own hatred for outsiders (in this case, kittypets) is consistent from book 1 to this very scene. and no one cares. because that’s “acceptable” xenophobia. its almost like the erins dont think xenophobia is all that bad actually and its kinda stupid to hone in on sparkpelt being twisted and bent into a strawman in this arc and act like shes the source of xenophobia when this whole damn series has a problem with xenophobia. sparkpelt’s xenophobia is only bad because it’s directed at the “wrong” group. and even then we’re supposed to gasp in horror with twigpaw as she gripes about how weird and bad skyclan is for the daylight warriors and leaders patrolling.

anyways back to alderheart’s tantrum. “we were so close!” oh, were you? this isnt new, youve been bitching about her being a selfish brat since book 1. you complain that she wouldnt understand your unique tortured soul, then you complain that she wants to help? and i guess the right thing to do would be letting you bite the dust. i honestly wish she did. itd be funny.

also the phone works both ways and she has a life. get a grip for fucks sake.

after this they admittedly have a nice moment where alderheart apologizes for being sensitive but it comes after spark is made to apologize for no good reason. so it hits weird. she reassures him about vague prophecy number 37384838. they have a nice chat about larksong.

and then because we need alderheart to have the ultimate w this chapter, a dog attacks sparkpelt and the medic with no training and no good fighting skills is able to epically save her life.

“omg alderheart that was so brave… youre the REAL hero…. youre so cool and awesome……….”

this would have been fine without this bullshit at the end to make alderheart win back his pride and get his sister back for emasculating him.

[vclvetfleur]

Obedient Chapter 2

roman roy x fem! reader

Summary: After a week of getting the job you seemed to finally get a hold of Roman and his weird humor. You were finally proving yourself to him.

Warnings: Implied drug abuse, dark jokes, degradation

Word Count: 3.8k

Notes: Okay Chapter 2! I do want to warn that (not in this chapter) but later on there will be a reveal of a tragic backstory. Not that y/n is like Roman, but traumatized as well. Theres also going to be some kind of fluff in this one. I am trying to make this a slow burn, but it's so hard. ANYWAYS Soooooo I hope you enjooooy.

Chapter 2: Costa Azzurra Eau de Parfum

You left the office completely stunned. I guess that’s how everyone felt after first meeting Roman. Meeting him was definitely something no one could prep you for. But hey, I guess you finally have a job now. Before you could collect your thoughts, you saw Jess heading your way. “So? What happened? Oh my god, what’d he say?” She spoke quickly, expecting the worst from Roman. Every time she’s been around him wasn’t the best. He was arrogant, disgusting, selfish, rude, well Roman.

“I got the job.” You tried to collect your thoughts. You spent so much time prepping and getting ready for this. You thought at the very least this would be a bit more professional. You didn’t think you’d get berated for 3 minutes. You were at least expecting to even get asked your credentials. If you even made sense for the job. But I guess the Roy’s had enough money to keep everyone quiet and inline. They didn’t need to be too careful.

“You did?” She blinked quickly, looking at Roman then you. Roman spotted her stares and snickered and wiggled his fingers in a way to say hi.

All you could do is nod. “I did.” You finally broke out of your thoughts and started to laugh. You finally were going to see what it was like on the other side. No more struggling or worrying. You could finally pay off your student debt and other debt you’ve unfortunately had to be left with. “Uhh Roman said I needed to speak to you about getting all my stuff organized and all that.” Jess nodded before walking you through what the next steps were.

Before she could even start, Kendall needed her. “uh-Jess, I need you to help me out with a situation right now, Uh- “He started before looking down at you. “What happened? Aren’t you- wait did he just waste our time or-?” He began to question. He seemed stressed. Like he was in a panic for something. Gosh, what a wreck. He was practically sweating an entire fountain. He looked pale. You recognized what it was. Roman hinted at it. Rehab. But it didn’t seem like he quit a while ago. It looked like he really needed his fix. And soon.

“I’m just getting y/n organized, Roman said- “She started to explain before getting cut off by Kendall. I guess they just did that sort of thing. God, how pretentious.

“You don’t work for Roman, do you? No. Now uh-y/n just tell Roman to get someone else to do it. Uh- yea, anyways, I need you…” He quickly snapped before walking away with Jess. You barely made out what he was saying as he left you behind. You were on your own now. You decided to take a breather before having to endure what was Roman Roy once again. Once you composed yourself you turned around, fixed your suit before walking back to his office where he was slouching at his desk, staring at the screen. His head shot quickly up to you as soon as he heard the door, but relaxed once he saw it was you and ignored you for his screen again. “Did you lose your little buddy or something” he teased.

“Uh- no. Kendall told me to get you to help me out instead. Cause, and I quote, ‘she doesn’t work for Roman’” You tried to catch him up. Roman let out an amused sigh as he shook his head. “Wow my brother really does have a way with words. The PC king strikes back again with his stupid fucking union bullshit or whatever. Uh yeah okay, well I don’t know how to do that shit.” His eyes finally leaving his screen to look at you. But not really at you. He really made such intense eye contact. I guess you had to when your dad is the CEO and you might, which I really doubt Roman ever would, become CEO one day.

“Okay, so do I just- “You question pointing your thumbs to the door to go look for someone to do what Roman should be doing for you. “No no, uh just sit down, let me annoy Gerri. Fuck what’s the point of assistant it’s like having a hamster or something” He huffed in annoyance before spamming Gerri with messages to come to his office. He made every attempt to finally get her attention.

You watched an older blonde woman storm into his office, clearly not in a mood to be dealing with him and his issues, which she seems to have been doing for a bit. “What do you want now Roman?” She sighed.

“Well, I wouldn’t mind if you striped naked and y’know call me whatever name you have in your head right now” He implied before seeing her give up with him and nearly leaving. “wait-wait- okay sorry. Uh Kendall got me a new toy and I need her to fill some shit out. You know legal bullshit.”

You just couldn’t believe he could talk to her like that. Nonetheless she seemed like she wasn’t completely livid. She didn’t even tell him off. You looked up at her before standing up and putting your hand out. “Hi, y/n” You smiled. Gerri gave you a smile that gave you the feeling of a disappointed parent, you’ve seen that look before.  “Hi, just follow me and I’ll get you set up. Romans to incompetent to even find where half of his emails are.” She tried to rationalize with you before leading you out of his office. You just followed and sat down in a small conference room with her. “So, what do you do?” You asked before sitting down. She had her back turned to you as she was gathering all the paperwork from the filing cabinets. They had people coming in and out, so they had them ready. But Gerri was right, Roman was incompetent. “I’m the companies General Counsel, uh I basically just make sure they don’t ruin the company with legal stuff” She tried to explain. You nodded silently before taking the papers from her. You decided to read some of it over. You couldn’t believe what was in some of it. For starters I had to be on the clock and at Roman’s disposal 24/7. I had to basically play as this grown man’s mother. The NDA was worse. Nothing that happened or was said could ever leave my mouth or fingers if I were to type it out. I couldn’t tell anything to anyone. Maybe that’s why Jess was so quiet on how Kendall was and what was actually going on. But regardless, you signed. Once you saw what your salary would be, you signed immediately. It was basically making a deal with the devil himself. You practically sold your soul. But who wouldn’t for that kind of money. Once you finished giving off your information, Gerri picked them up and left a hand on your shoulder. “Good luck dear, just one rule I have for you, just don’t pay any of them any mind.” She warned before leaving.

You watched as she walked off, her heels clacking out of the room and leaving you alone. You stood up before finally exiting the room yourself.

You got up before going back to Roman for the day before seeing him grabbing his things on his way to leave. “Where are you going?” You asked. You hadn’t even been here an hour and he was leaving. “An orgy.” He joked before leaving the office. “Give me your phone quickly.” You tried to protest before he snatched it out of your pocket from your suit jacket. “What’s the passcode?” You reached back before he moved it away from you. “Nuh-uh. I need to give you my number if you’re gonna get paid. I do it with all my paid hookers.”

“I’m not a hooker. Or a pet. So, stop comparing me to that.” You stood your ground finally. You weren’t use to keeping your mouth shut. You never really even kept quiet this long. “Yea sure you’re not. That’s what the last Guinee pig hooker I hired said.” He said before using your face to finally unlock your phone. You reached out again before having him smack your hand out of the way. “Ow!” You cried out, holding your wrist.

“Boo fucking hoo, cry me a river, snowflake.” He seemed to try to correct you. You watched him intensely as he seemed to be on your phone forever now. “Oh what, you scared I’m gonna find some sex tape on this? You know it isn’t really smart to keep that on here. With the cloud and whatever the fuck those perverts do. Me, on the other hand, don’t care. You can watch all you want.” He shot you a wink. You reeled back. He wasn’t a good flirt. If this is what he called flirting. It was disgusting. He was basically a walking PR nightmare packaged in a small insecure man’s body. He tossed your phone up in the air before you could even process what happened. You frantically jolted and tried to grab it, thankfully grabbing it before it had fallen on the floor. “Done, I texted myself. I’ll text you what I need after my crazy insane BDSM orgy.” He laughed before hitting the L button. The elevators shut and he was finally gone. I guess it was time to go home too. You decided today was enough. This had been completely overly stimulating for you. It was definitely an intense day. You went home and laid down on your bed. Before you could even cut your eyes, your phone began to buzz. You opened it to see a few texts from Roman. He put his name in your phone to ‘sexy new boss’. What a prick? You’ve never met someone who was so into himself. 

‘helloooooooo’

‘it’s me, your new fuckable boss’.

‘you cant use that against me in court by the way.’

‘hellooooooo I said its me’

‘i’ll send a bomb to your house if you don’t respond to me’

‘okay fine. done. just sent one. now I need a new assistant’

‘ok ok im joking’

You read them as they came one after the other. Wow what a deranged little man. You swiped the messages open and finally replied to him.

‘What do you need?’ you sent.

‘ooo wow so profess. just checking to see if you quit’

‘im kidding again. just checking in on you’

You shook your head before replying to him again with a simple thank you and shutting your phone off again.

This is how it was for nearly a week. You would get ready for work as early as 7:30 am, just to be sent home early because Roman refused to even be there. And when he was, he was basically just making disgusting and deranged comments towards you or whoever the fuck was in the room. But that you can handle. Just an annoyance at this point. He did text you constantly. He seemed lonely. Like he didn’t even have anyone to really talk to. He spent most of his day or even night trying to get you to reply to him. He would send you text after text after text. He assumed because Kendall always texted Jess that was the reason, they were close enough for him to trust her. But he couldn’t break that barrier with you. He didn’t know what he could do to get you to even give him any kind of attention.  You barely flinched at his jokes, at least you didn’t show it and you were social with everyone else. He didn’t understand his need for his attention from you. But he got some kind from everyone so easily. He wanted whatever he couldn’t have. The only kind of reaction you would give him was quiet. You barely even made fun of him back.

You headed to the office later than usual, realizing that you were mostly wasting your time just showing up at 9 am. You were gonna be waiting on Roman for at least 2 hours for him to even get here. He probably had been sleeping in til 12 pm sometimes. You don’t know how Logan hadn’t fired him already. Even if he was his own son. You walked into the building at 11, knowing this was the earliest Roman would even get here. You stepped out of the elevator to see Roman in his office. You walked in before knocking on the door to let him know you were here.

“You’re late.” He sang as he pulled away from his computer. He laughed to himself, looking up at you.

“Sorry, I didn’t expect you to be at the office yet.” You explained before setting down your latte that you got before work. You sat down and pulled out your tablet to review what was next for Roman to slack off on.

“Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be here. Aren’t you a little slacker? Do I have to look back at your references and experience on that resume of yours?” He sat up, laying his hands on the desk. He was always so amused to annoy you.

“You never looked at my resume, remember? You thought it was a waste of our time.” You remined.

“Yea yea but what do I know? I’m just an attractive billionaire about to be crowned COO.” He shrugged. You didn’t know if he was insulting you and your education or if he was being genuine.

“Crowned? Do you think you’re getting a coronation or something?” You finally fired back at him. “That’s not how that works.” “Yeah I don’t know what the shit is, but regardless, now that you said it, I want it.” He raised his chin up like a little schoolboy. He seemed so proud of his stupid joke. He always did. He really did think he was extremely hilarious. Even if no one laughed at his own jokes, he did. It was the only thing he ever really liked about himself. I mean, he partly hated it because it made people not like him that much, but he knew he didn’t have much to ever offer people. Laughing was the only thing he could do to keep people around him happy enough with him. Or else he’d be just another substance abuser like Kendall or a prick like Shiv or even worse, boring like Connor.

“Yea, let me get my measuring tape out for the dick measuring contest then.” You finally learned to play along. You didn’t want to argue and fight with yourself to keep quiet. You thought it only made your day more stressful.  You expected something bad from Roman for talking like that, but you looked up to only see him actually laughing at your throw back. You hid a smile as you looked back down at your tablet. Even though you didn’t like to admit it too, your humor was also the only thing you liked about yourself. You didn’t like to be alone either. It was too much to be alone with all your own thoughts too. You also didn’t like the silence. You craved hearing people talking about other than your own issues or weird ticks. It was good to get the attention not on you all the time, unless you wanted it. 

“It’s a good 9 inches, alright? I should know I put my dick up against almost every guy I’ve met.” He lied so easily. It was only cause he knew no one would actually believe him.

“Even your dads?” You tried to hit a nerve. This was starting to seem like some kind of fun to you. It was so easy to make fun of him back because he really didn’t care what people even said to him.

“Ew no you pervert. You wish though.” That was probably the first time he said it to someone else rather than being called that. Unless it was Moe or Karl. One of those weird fucks from the board. His dad was tied in with a lot of sketchy guys in all honesty. “Besides, I could whip it out if you’d like to see that badly.”

You shook your head, outing your hand up in protest. “Nope, I’m good. Don’t worry. Anyways you have to do your work.” You said before getting up to go over to him to show him what was due today. He wasn’t gonna do them, but you felt safe enough that Roman wouldn’t grope you. You leaned down to his level, him sitting up to reach up to you, showing him the tablet of the upcoming projects.

Your bodies were barely an inch away from each other that you could even smell the weird pervy cologne he had on. It was a weird kind of nice. You kind of liked it, but you couldn’t pinpoint what you liked about it. Maybe like when you can’t stop tasting or smelling something that smells kind of off just because of curiosity. Regardless, it smelt like Roman just went to a perfume shop and picked the most expensive and ridiculous looking bottle he could even find.

You felt his eyes on you as you spoke, but it wasn’t as uncomfortable as you imagined. “Pay attention.” You redirected him, but he didn’t stray his longing looks away. He tried to get a read on you. You were so unwilling to let him see you crack or even show any kind of frustration. Not that he wanted to, but everyone did at this point. Or at least people expressed so after meeting him for a bit. You continued on and on before stopping to look his way, finding your face almost against his. Your faces were so close to one another you bumped your nose against his. You pulled back a bit as you tried to readjust how you were standing by him. You finally realized Roman was a lot softer than you initially thought. He was an asshole, sure. But he was kind of endearing to you. Something made you drawn to him. Maybe it was the way he tried to get a laugh all the time or that you finally realized his eyes were brown. Or maybe that he wasn’t as harsh looking as you thought. He looked grosser when you first glanced at him, but up close you were finally taking in all of his features. His weird little quirks that made him look so strange actually made sense on his face. You even noticed he was kind of smiling at you. You turned back to the tablet and pushed his chin to face it as well. “Come on now. Do I need to play Bluey or Coco Melon for you?”

“I don’t know what the fuck that is, but if they’re names of porn stars, then yes.” He laid his arm on the desk, putting his hand up to his head to hold it, positioning to look right back at you.

“Doesn’t your brother have kids? Don’t they watch kid shows? Or are you not allowed within a 200 feet radius of children?” You were trying not to get frustrated with him on his tasks of the day. You spent everyday making these notes for him to never even do them. “You really think Kendall takes care of them? Fuck no. He’s too busy doing blow in some undergrown New York club to watch them. My dad really led by example.” Roman confessed something he shouldn’t have, but he was hoping you’d find it all a joke like all of his weird comments. You blinked to understand all the trauma that was dumped in front of you. “Wow. Okay.” Was the only words that could attempt to even leave your mouth. You tried to shake that brand new information off. “Ah yeah, Kendall is a fake snowflake wannabe. He acts like he’s read Karl Marx and that he even gives a fuck.” Roman really tried to keep this impression of hating Kendall. Not that you understood what their relationship even was, but it was confusing to way the very least. They constantly seemed to be annoyed with one another, but you’ve seen other articles and pictures of them where they looked like your average billionaire happy family. You hated to say, but you really enjoyed the insider details of whatever fucked up dynamic this was. “Alright start your speech again, I wasn’t listening.” He seemed actually serious this time. You nodded and just went back to the top of your notes. Roman just wanted to move this topic as quick. He shared too much. He shouldn’t have, but who else could he talk shit about his brother with? Everyone he knew adored Ken except Shiv, but right now she was annoyed at him for whatever reason she came up with now. All because he insinuated that Shiv was with Tom only for comfort and not cause she actually loved him. But whatever, she was being a bitch.

He seemed to actually listen to you, was he actually going to do any of that? Fuck no, but it was an excuse to move the conversation. And just to hear you talk again. You really were smart. You actually did know what the fuck you were talking about and not just playing some kind of role. Maybe with the outfit and hair, but still, you seemed smart enough to know what you even said.

You spent the entire day with Roman before he started to get ready to leave early again. Which was your cue to also get ready to leave. “Oh uh- by the way, there’s a party tonight, I need you on the clock for that. I’ll send over some actually clothes to your place. Not anything from a fucking sweat shop. My driver will get you.” He said as quickly he could before walking off. You never had any time to react to Roman. He was way too fast for you to even fully comprehend anything that left his mouth. It was always so much.

But wow okay. A rich person party. This was new. Not an exciting new. More of an anxious new. Like going to a new school for the first time kind of new. If you looked any kind of wrong, you knew you’d be shunned or even made fun of in there. It didn’t take long for these people to start to laugh or mock people in this office, you could only imagine what it could be like at a party with billionaires like the Roy’s.

Notes: Next chapter is up!

Chapter 3

[maximwtf]

“listlessness.”

 Elrond x Reader

words: 2170

google docs pages: 4

warnings: Hurt with no comfort, death, griefing

opening: After your passing, Elrond tries to shake off the memories of you in every room of his house. Though, this task proves to be harder than he could have ever imagined. 

AN// Reader can be any gender. I haven’t written a good old angst in a while, and I feel like this had to be done because of that. Went full on out with this, angst with absolutely no comfort :”D I used lyrics from this beautiful -> song

           “listlessness.”

You’d fallen ill one day, and as much as you kept telling Elrond that you’d be fine, he kept fussing over you. Neither of you could figure out what was wrong, and your condition kept getting worse by the time wasted with no answers on how to help. Even when you had become bedridden, you kept telling the Lord of Rivendell that you’d bounce back up eventually, that if he just calmed down for a moment, things would get better. That of course never changed anything, his care for you combined with the mind of a healer didn’t allow him to get almost any rest at all as he fussed over you. It hurt to watch him be so worried, ignoring some of his duties while trying his best to find answers, to find a cure. 

At some point guests and other elves had started to notice the way he had changed. You told him this, told him that people would find out about the secret the two of you had kept so well hidden for so long. You’d been courting him, silently and out of the picture since neither of you wanted to reveal it so suddenly, but took your time with it instead. Elrond’s children had their suspicions, but they kept it to themselves, having respect for their father and his relationships. But it was the guests and Elrond’s assistants and such that worried you, even when the mystery illness was bringing you down along with it. He heard your concerns, and as much as he worried about others finding out before it was the right time for it, he did not care. No secret he could have thought of was so important, as to surpass your wellbeing. That was of the utmost importance to him, had always been. 

Time had started to pass in a weird pattern for you, sleeping had become such an important part of your day that it had begun to feel like it was the only thing you were able to do. Sometimes when you woke up, Elrond was there. He’d talk to you for as long as you were able to talk. Sometimes you tried to stay awake past your limits, but in those cases Elrond would stop the conversations. He was not stupid, and as much as he loved spending time with you, he was not going to allow you to harm yourself by talking to him. He would assure you that he’d be right back whenever you woke up again, leaving you to sleep. 

This lasted for some time, Elrond visiting you while working and trying to find a cure. But internally the both of you knew that you didn’t have much time left. And if the cure didn’t magically appear, you wouldn’t make it for much longer. Either way it hurt Elrond to watch you suffer through every day, fighting with the small amounts of energy that you still had within you. You’d always been so strong. So in a way, he was glad. Glad, when he had entered the all too familiar room from the past months where he found you unresponsive. He silenced the spikes of grief in that moment with the thought of it being selfish. Selfish to miss you so, when he knew it was better this way if it had been him who had failed to find the cure. You could now rest at ease.

Maybe it was the whole of Rivendell, or perhaps it was just him. But everything felt silent, a colourless silence that had overtook the whole building, a feeling that followed the Lord of Rivendell wherever he went. Elrond continued to complete his duties as he had before, with the same care. But out of all the burdens that he had been through within his whole long life, this one’s weight was heavy. Heavier than he could have ever imagined. He had told himself in the past that he understood that you were a human, that you’d live a life that would pass fastly in his eyes. That if he was going to go further, to court you, he’d have to come to terms with that. And that was something you had asked for him to understand as well, knowing how important he was to Rivendell. But you had not lived the long life he had wished for you to have, the life that you had deserved to live. It’d been cut short, way too short. 

There is still an empty shelf in the closet for your belongings

Time passed, just as it had when you’d still been there with him. And time would keep passing by, no matter how much he wished for it to stop. Stop, just for a moment to give him time to think. To give him a moment to sit down and process. That was what his inner mind craved for, but what he did instead was continue life. He tried to block off the feeling, keeping himself busy and keeping the thought in his mind that it would have been selfish for him to feel the way he wished he could. Would have you wanted for him to cry after you, to seem clingy for something that wasn’t there anymore?

But his attempts at that were most of the time useless. Every time he was left alone, with no duties to go complete, the thoughts and memories came back. You’d been with him every day, in the same house with him for so long. He hadn’t had the heart to throw away your belongings yet, he did not wish to touch them. They felt pure in a way as they were, the last person who had been in contact with them being you. Though he knew he should put them away. If not throw away then perhaps store them somewhere close to him. Maybe that seemed silly, foolish of him even. 

He should have by now been used to loss. He’d seen many failed attempts with healing others, and this should have been just like that. But that was again what he kept telling himself. 

One day he took it upon himself to empty the shelves in your shared quarters. He did end up saving the items, storing them away for he did not have the heart to get rid of them. The grief he hadn’t let wash over him was making him do it, whether he liked it or not. And Elrond let it. He had thought of asking for someone else to do it for him, but that felt wrong as well. He wanted to heal himself in a way, but that was not something he was used to. So he believed that doing this may have been the help he needed.

and space for you on the bed, still waiting

But that was not the only thing he wasn’t used to. With the countless memories he had with you in the house, in all of the rooms there was one that reminded him of you the most. Mornings and nights that used to be a comfort for him before entering another hectic day had now turned into something he wished he could avoid. The now half empty bed he had shared with you, the place that had taken you ages to get used to sharing even when Elrond had told you countless times that it was okay. That place was now strange without you there. Even giving it a look, not daring to lay down brought a nowadays familiar feeling to him. The burn that started from the back of his throat and then moved up to the back of his eyes and soon brought up tears, which he shook off every time. 

waiting for you to silently press your head on my chest, when you can’t sleep

As many times as he tried, the tears always welled back up. Shaking them away never helped, and Elrond knew that. He had tried it multiple times, at the start- and at the end of every day since you had left and never did it work. But nevertheless he needed sleep. He could work as much as he wanted and try to ignore his emotions, but at some point he needed to stop and get some rest. It humoured Elrond to hear himself tell the patients he took care of to get some rest. That they’d feel better after that when he himself hadn’t slept in an unforgivable time. Elrond wasn’t one to self neglect, but the loss he was feeling was too much to bear in his sleep. He could go for a good long while before he felt the need to get any rest, but alas it still caught up to him. 

So he still laid down, still tried to take care of himself. He did it because he knew that’s something you would have wanted him to do even if you weren’t there anymore. That was one of the rare thoughts that gave him peace of mind. Everything that used to be familiar and comforting on the bed was now gone.

Due to him not having to sleep as much as a human, he had never been a heavy sleeper. He woke up easily, which had never bothered him. Most of the time he’d simply been there for you, and enjoyed stirring awake to you cuddling up closer. It gave him a reason to not get up until you’d wake up again, a reason for his mind to stop thinking about all the duties he had to fulfil. He was occupied. 

I’m missing you here, every day so much

Elrond knew people eventually started to notice his change, and if someone dared to ask him if he was alright, he insisted. Insisted that he would be fine, and that this was going to pass so there was no need to worry. At some point he even believed it himself. In his long lifetime he had seen and experienced so much, and he had learned to put his trust on time. As it passed, he had always begun to feel better as he moved on. Though, this sadness felt different, still just as heavy as before. 

Elrond still kept on doing the routines he had followed before all this. He dined with his family, sometimes even had guests over to eat with him. Of course, word got around and at some point the people he had over also knew of what had happened. Not only did they know of your passing, but they had started to wonder why he cared so deeply about one mortal from all of the people Elrond had taken care of in his life. Of course at some point it started to be clear to them that he must have been courting you, but since neither of you hadn’t had the time to reveal it officially, none of his guests asked him about it. In this way, showing their respect for the man.

I’ll keep putting out a plate for you, even if you never came again

The chefs had stopped putting out a plate for you soon after your passing had been announced, though Elrond had not come to that realisation for a long time after. He used to have supper with you, alone. He’d made time for that every day, because he enjoyed the company you provided when there was no one else around. Sometimes the shared dinners became a little hectic, and as much as he did not mind it at all, he held it close to his heart whenever he saw you arrive at the shared table for supper. 

So each time for supper he had found himself at that same table, putting out a plate for you. The first time he felt his heart ache, pull in different directions as he took a deep breath and collected the utensils away. By now, whenever he found himself repeating the same action he didn’t remove the plates. Maybe somewhere in his mind he was wishing you’d arrive back at some point, as foolish as that thought may have been. 

I’m missing you here, every day so much

After all this time, after all his duties, he always found himself leaving his study and making his way outside. The house and all the rooms within it felt less homely than they ever had before. So his mind made him wander back into the gardens, where he sometimes sat for hours. A place where he could be alone, where he didn’t used to be alone. But even without your physical presence there, it somehow didn't feel as pressuring as the air in the house. The usually calm sigh he used to calm himself was shaky today. From stress and piled up grief. When the first tear rolled down his cheek, the warmth within him in that moment felt like it started to return the colours around him. Slowly, but they started to come back. 

AN// I felt like I made this a little longer than necessary, but hopefully no one minds. Either way I feel like we need some more Elrond content here !