#is it that hard to wait one more ep? what was the point of doing it in the first ep of the season and not the previous season's finale?

[zorobff]

how to disappear. (opla!zoro x fem!reader)

synopsis: joining luffy’s crew made you believe that you’d finally escaped your former pirate crew and nightmare of a captain for good. that is, until a certain butler starts looking a little too familiar. good thing zoro’s keeping a close eye on you.

warnings: opla spoilers (ep 3), some direct dialogue from opla, mentions of verbal/physical abuse, kuro is just a weirdo tbh, reader is called a bitch, protective zoro, for the sake of the story sham and buchie joined the black cat pirates after reader left

word count: 4.7k

“this guy is full of shit.”

you knock your shoulder into zoro’s wider one. “be nice. and so what if he is?” 

zoro gives you a pointed glare. “then we should turn around and look for someone who can actually help us find a ship.” 

“all business, as per usual,” you reply, with a purposefully dramatic sigh. “why can’t you have a little fun?” 

“what about this is supposed to be fun?” zoro spits out the word like it’s poisonous. “this is the blandest village i’ve ever seen.”

you scoff. “now you’re the one that’s full of shit. nothing’s ever bland with us and you know it.” 

the us in question was your newly formed pirate crew… if you and luffy could even be considered that. having left the ship you’d been on a few years ago, you were in search of a new crew. luffy was persistent and charming — when you’d crossed paths in shells town, it took little to no time for him to convince you to join his hunt for the one piece. zoro and nami, on the other hand, had yet to follow in your footsteps. 

“well, considering that we’ve only been traveling together for a day and a half and i’ve already escaped a marine base, defeated a marine captain, and fought a clown with devil fruit powers… i’d actually have to agree.” 

you can’t help but giggle at his sarcastic delivery. “be grateful, zoro. not many pirate crews are this fun to be on, trust me. oh wait, that’s right, you still haven’t officially joined—”

“tell me about your old pirate crew,” interjects zoro, your comment having piqued his interest. 

you notice that the playful atmosphere dissipates. “god, where do i even start?” 

zoro answers that for you. “why did you leave?”

“starting with the hard hitting questions, huh?” you joke, mostly to stall. you clear your throat before you answer. “well, it was different. nothing like what luffy has going on. he actually cares about his crew… and even those who aren’t technically on it.” 

at that, a smile tugs at the corner of zoro’s lips. even you crack a small grin. although as you continue speaking, it fades. 

“on my old crew, we were dispensable. anytime something went wrong, our own captain would threaten to kill us. it was… scary, to be completely honest. there were so many times when i thought i’d die with that filthy crew. and i never wanted that. so as soon as we docked at shells town, i left.”  

zoro’s jaw clenches as imagines the things you’d seen and been subjected to. “this old captain of yours sounds like a real—”

“he was a nightmare,” you tell him. “he didn’t care that i was the only woman on board, he treated me just as horribly, if not worse.” 

zoro stops so suddenly that it takes you a second to realize he’s not walking alongside you.

“what do you mean by that.” the way zoro phrases the inquiry doesn’t even make it sound like a question. more like a demand. his narrowed eyes are fixed solely on you. holding his gaze feels… intense. 

you can’t help but glance away as you answer him. “he was just a bit of a creep.”

before zoro has the chance to try and extract more information out of you, a familiar voice calls both your names. you’re not really sure when you and zoro had fallen behind but from where you currently stand, the rest of your group looks miniature. or perhaps it’s just the massive size of the mansion behind them that makes luffy, nami, and usopp look pocket-sized in comparison. 

“why’d you stop walking?!” your captain shouts, hands pressed on each side of his mouth to amplify his voice. “get over here, we’re about to go in through the top secret entrance!” 

you vaguely make out usopp gesturing for luffy to keep his voice down. you’re sure that would warrant another comment from zoro about his reliability but he’s too busy staring at you with that expectant look in his eyes. 

“we better catch up,” you tell him, heading in the direction of the deluxe home. 

he allows you to dodge the subject and sighs, walking in long strides to catch up to you.  

“i’ve never seen a house this big before,” luffy admits, admiring the mansion along with the wellkept greenery surrounding it. 

“awesome, right?” usopp gloats, walking around like he owned the place. “kaya’s given me an open invitation to drop by anytime i want.” 

“wow.” you’re not sure if luffy was just going along with usopp’s act or if he really believed him. knowing the devil fruit user, it was more than likely the latter. “all this for just one person?”

“well, she lives here with her butler and a few other staff,” usopp replies, leaning against the stone well that sat in the middle of the lawn.

“money really shows you who people truly are,” nami mutters, eyes scanning the property. “most people only care about themselves and what’s theirs.”

zoro is quick to throw the insult back at her. “sounds like someone i know.”

you roll your eyes at his comment, though you make no effort to disagree with him. nami was a little on the materialistic side. 

“and a small staff makes for easy pickings,” she continues, proving your point.

“we just got here and you’re already planning on robbing the place blind?” you ask though you already know the answer.

“at least a little blurry,” she smirks, following behind luffy and usopp who walk toward the entrance. 

you and zoro share a look. one that says disappointed but not surprised. 

going under a shrub shaped as an arch, you’re met with a beautiful pond. you admire the pink lilies that float at the top and the bushes that were intricately trimmed into the shape of various animals. even if the people that lived here were filthy rich, at least they had good decorative taste. 

“so if you have an invitation, why are we going around the back way?” luffy ponders.

usopp’s answer is nonchalant. “oh, i never use the front entrance. like i said, this is the vip entrance reserved for special guests.”

zoro scoffs. “this guy’s definitely–”

“don’t start,” you groan, cutting him off. 

abruptly, usopp freezes and spins around, attempting to usher your crew back. “you know what, there’s actually a more exclusive entrance this way–”

the sharp swoosh of a knife cutting through the air and burying itself in the ground between usopp’s feet cuts him off. from the direction the kitchen utensil was thrown stands a heavyset gentleman with his face wrinkled in anger. his demanding voice booms through the garden, “the hell are you doing here, usopp?” 

the dark-skinned boy fumbles over his word. “buchi, buddy, uh, kaya’s expecting me.”

“another one of your lies,” the man – seemingly named buchi – seethes, grabbing him by the collar. “you ain’t welcome here and you know it.”

“i know nothing of the sort,” usopp retorts, keeping his cool even when he was practically being lifted off the ground by his shirt. “i’m here to give kaya an extra special gift.”

before buchi can get another word out, a feminine voice calls out for your companion. coming down the steps is a frail looking girl in a pink dress. on her arm is a man dressed in a crisp suit, presumably the butler usopp had mentioned earlier. though, from where you stand you can’t see either of their faces too clearly. 

“what a wonderful surprise,” she exclaims, breathlessly. 

“kaya!” usopp exclaims, returning her enthusiasm. buchi has no choice but to let him go, begrudgingly. usopp makes sure to shoot him a smug look before walking towards the young girl. “happy birthday.” 

the butler clears his throat, not afraid to intrude on their special moment. “usopp, we’ve discussed this before. you mustn’t show up unannounced.” 

“nonsense, klahadore.” kaya smiles warmly. “have you come to tell me another story? i do love hearing about your adventures.” 

“i’ll do you one better,” usopp smirks with such confidence that even you’re left wondering what kind of surprise he has up his sleeve. “i brought some of my crew!” he gestures back towards the four of you, proudly. 

your excitement vanishes. “oh. the surprise is… us.”

“well, that’s boring,” luffy agrees, just as disappointed as you are. 

kaya, on the other hand, is none the wiser. “it’s so nice to meet you. you must all stay for dinner.” 

klahadore lowers his voice. “miss kaya, it is a bit last minute. i’m afraid the kitchen hasn’t prepared for any extra guests.”

“please,” begs kaya, softly. “it’s my birthday. can’t be too much trouble can it?” 

giving in, klahadore purses his lips. “anything for you, miss kaya.” 

luffy claps his hands together. “alright! when do we eat?” 

“you don’t. not dressed like that, at least.” the butler directs himself to a staff member with teal colored hair. “sham, kindly show usopp and his friends to the guest suites. you will bathe and change before dinner.”

she follows his orders and leads the way. luffy, usopp, nami, and zoro trail behind her and you go to do the same. however, all it takes is a quick glance to stop you dead in your tracks. usually, you weren’t one to stare but klahadore’s face. that stare. so dark and depraved. 

“yes, miss?” he asks, holding your gaze. “can i help you?” 

“n-no, i…” your throat goes dry as you attempt to recover smoothly. “i just wanted to, um, thank you for being so hospitable.” 

his lips curve upwards into a sinister grin. “the pleasure’s all mine.” as if to confirm your worst fear, klahadore uses his palm to readjust his glasses. his beady eyes gauge your reaction closely.

the familiar gesture sends chills down your spine. appearance-wise, he had changed drastically but his aura was still just as menacing as you remember it. he was still the corrupt pirate captain you used to serve under. you feel like a weak and helpless subordinate all over again.

“klahadore!” giggles kaya. “you’re smiling! that’s certainly a rarity.”

he hums. “i’ve simply come to the realization that having guests once in a while can truly be a delight.”

his sickeningly sweet tone makes your stomach turn. just the fact that you were standing in front of him – captain kuro – again after all these years was nauseating in itself. last you’d heard he had died at the hands of captain morgan. how was this even possible? then again, he wasn’t dubbed kuro of a hundred plans for no reason. he always had a trick or two up his sleeve. you assumed this was no different. 

“hey, you comin’?”

you turn around to see zoro waiting for you. he meets your gaze for a moment. the softness of his eyes is a stark contrast to kuro’s. it’s a breath of fresh air. he then shifts his attention to your former captain and you swear his eyes darken. 

“yeah, sorry,” you mumble, trying not to look shaken as you walk up the steps. 

zoro follows behind you, this time closer than before.

“why would anybody even need this many clothes?”

“it’s not about need with these people, luffy. it’s about want,” nami spits, thumbing through the various fabrics on the wall. 

“at least she’s rich and nice,” luffy replies, innocently.

nami rolls her eyes. “yeah, letting us stay for dinner must be her idea of charity work.” 

“what are we even supposed to wear?” luffy continues, uninterested in nami’s criticism of the rich. 

“anything you want. when are you ever going to get the opportunity to wear things this nice?” 

you step out from behind the changing board where you’d swapped out your old tee and cargo skirt for an elegant satin dress. it was a stunning shade of olive green and frilly lace decorated the edges. not to mention, it hugged your curves in all the right ways.

nami’s eyes widen. “see, she’s got the right idea. you look amazing.” 

you smile, bashfully. “honestly, i feel amazing.”

“you look the same to me,” your captain shrugs.

nami shoots him a death glare but you intervene before she can scold him.

“way to keep me humble, luffy.”

“no problem!” 

at that exact moment, a freshly showered zoro arrives donning a silk robe. he eyes the multitude of garments that cover every inch of the room, not particularly impressed. 

“there you are. don’t you think she looks nice?” nami asks him, gesturing towards you. she doesn’t notice how you shrink under zoro’s gaze. neither does he, as his eyes take their time raking over you, from top to bottom.

he hums. “suits you.” with that, he sets off towards a chair in the corner of the room.  

“seriously?” sighs nami, exasperated. “are you two physically unable to give compliments or something?” 

“hey, doesn’t that butler seem familiar to you guys?” zoro asks, promptly ignoring nami’s complaint. 

his question causes your breath to hitch. you’d pushed the kuro problem to the back of your mind while you were in search of a suitable dinner outfit. you figured that as long as your crew was by your side, he wouldn’t dare try anything. and even if he did… well, you’d seen what had happened to axe-hand morgan and buggy. 

“yeah, i think he was at the last dinner party i attended,” nami replies sarcastically, taking a handful of dresses behind the changing board. 

as he takes a seat, zoro grumbles, “i swear i’ve seen him before.” 

“where?” you can’t help but ask, fiddling with the lace on the neckline of your dress. 

“so far, i’ve got two suspicions. a wanted poster or funky bar on mirrorball island. you ever been?”

you know zoro’s teasing you, judging by the grin on his face. after all, funky bar was known to get insanely rowdy; never would he imagine finding someone as gentle as you there. but what he didn’t know is that it happened to be one of kuro’s favorite bars. per his request, you and the rest of the black cat pirates frequented it often, so he was more than likely right about having seen kuro there. he’d probably even seen you in passing, once or twice. thankfully, he doesn’t seem to have any recollection of that.

the thought of zoro knowing about your past forms a knot in the pit of your stomach. would he think less of you for having joined such a ruthless crew at one point in your life? what if it put a strain on the friendship you’d worked so hard to form? 

“i’ve, uh, heard of it,” you decide to reply, pushing down your worries for the time being. 

he tilts his head slightly, thinking out loud. “then again, i have seen a lot of wanted posters and bars in my time as a pirate hunter.”

you feel a grin creep onto your face. “probably more bars than posters, huh?”

zoro mirrors your smile. “shut up.”

by the time dinner rolls around, the entire crew is doing what they do best. 

luffy is stuffing his face, nami is attempting to swindle one of the staff, zoro is hanging by the drinks, and you’re hanging by zoro. 

“hey zoro, you gotta try this!” luffy calls through a mouthful of food.

“i’ve got all i need right here,” he mutters, taking a swig out of his champagne flute. 

“you know, i don’t think i’ve ever seen you choke down something that isn’t alcohol,” you comment, watching the way he downs the glass in one go. 

dryly, he replies, “that’s because i haven’t.”

“very on brand.”

“ladies and gentlemen,” calls out that voice from the top of the stairs. “may i present… miss kaya.”

arm in arm, kuro and kaya walk down the steps, all eyes on the birthday girl and her stunning gown. well, except you. your eyes never leave the so-called butler by her side. your jaw clenches when he has the audacity to meet your gaze and hold it. shameless bastard. 

once they reach the bottom, merry leads kaya to the guests while kuro takes his post at the bottom of the stairs… right next to the drink table. before you can think about steering yourself and zoro away, kuro speaks.

“forgive me if i am speaking out of line, madam, but i must inform you. you look positively radiant,” he purrs, soaking in your appearance. he looks ready to pounce.

you can’t stop your eyes from rolling. good to know he’s the same pervert he used to be.

looking between you both and sensing your discomfort, zoro steps in. “and you look familiar.” 

kuro’s head stiffly turns to face him, eyes peeling away from you. “highly doubtful, sir.” 

“funky bar? mirror ball island?” 

“funky bar?” kuro repeats, disgusted. “well, i can assure you i’ve never patronized that type of establishment.” 

while it was amusing to see your highly esteemed former captain lie through his teeth, the tension between him and zoro was unbearable. 

“well then.” zoro continues with his little interrogation. “ever been on a wanted poster?”

you cringe at his bluntness. sometimes it seemed like he had less of a filter than luffy.

kuro puts on a scandalized face at the question. “sir! such an accusation is highly offensive.” tugging on his collar, he goes to remove himself from zoro’s probing. “now, if you’ll excuse me, i’m going to help prepare the dinner table.” 

he leaves, en route to the dining room. zoro’s eyes follow his figure until he disappears, squinting as he racks his brain for any further recollection of this suspicious butler. 

you sigh. if zoro was going to continue being so relentless, you were sure the night would end in bloodshed and uncovered secrets. 

“keep this coming,” zoro demands, handing the empty wine bottle to sham. she takes it with a glare. 

“would it kill you to say please?” you ask, slicing the slab of fish on your plate into smaller pieces.

“the service here is shitty. why should i have to be polite?” 

you scowl. “remind me to never have dinner with you again.”

zoro turns to you with that cocky grin of his. “what if i asked nicely?” 

his quip makes your heart flutter but you manage to keep your composure. “you can try your luck.” 

before he can respond, usopp speaks up. “luffy, isn’t there something that you wanted to talk to kaya about?” 

luffy gesticulates enthusiastically with his fork. “oh, yes! usopp told me that you own the whole shipyard.” 

“well, actually, my parents founded the shipyard and merry’s been running the business since they… passed. but all that’s about to change. tonight, at midnight, i will become the sole owner.” she smiles somberly. 

“well, that’s great,” luffy says, raising his drink at her. “because we want to buy a ship from you.” 

“ah, i see. usopp mentioned that you’re sailors.” 

“nope, not sailors. we’re pirates!”

you’re certain at least three people at the table choke on their food, yourself included. 

“this ought to be good,” zoro mumbles behind his glass.

you’re too busy coughing into your napkin to chastise him for finding this entertaining.

“pirates?” kaya repeats, unsure of how to react. 

“yup! we haven’t sailed together for very long but we’ve already defeated an evil clown, raided a marine base, and taken down a captain with an axe! for a hand!” luffy holds up a fist, presumably to impersonate axe-hand morgan.

“sounds a lot like your adventures, usopp,” kaya says, turning to the brunette.

all he can do is laugh dryly. “yeah, that’s… that’s crazy.” 

“and we’re just getting started!” luffy continues, climbing up onto the table.

“someone put me out of my misery,” you mumble, looking down at your plate to ignore the secondhand embarrassment.

a tap on your shoulder answers your plea.

turning around, you find yourself face to face with kuro once again. “madam, a word please?”

“might i ask what for?” zoro cuts in before you can so much as think of a response.

kuro offers him the most forced grin you’ve ever had the displeasure of seeing. “i’m afraid that is between the lady and i.”

the swordsman turns to you, scanning your face for any ounce of discomfort. “you okay with that?”

you inhale, figuring it was finally time for you to confront the darkest part of your past. it was silly to assume you would be able to ignore him throughout your entire stay here. besides, you were sure zoro, just like the rest of your crew, would be on standby if kuro got brave enough to try anything. “sure. just… keep an eye out.”

zoro understands completely. truthfully, you didn’t even need to ask – he always looked after you. “got it.”

you push yourself out of your seat and smooth out your dress. you allow kuro to lead you to the doorway – he was smart enough to know that was the farthest you’d let him take you. 

“what do you want, klahadore?” you seethe, folding your arms.

he arches a brow. “why must you call me that? it’s ridiculous.” 

you tilt your head with faux innocence. “oh? is that not your name? must have misheard.”

he gives you an irritated look, dark eyes drilling into you.

“i remember that look,” you mutter, your memory serving you well. “it’s the same one you’d give me before you’d threaten to slice me to bits with your claws.”

kuro has the audacity to chuckle dryly. “but i never did, did i? although there were certainly times times where i should’ve.”

“what you should be is dead,” you hiss bitterly. “when i heard the news, i knew it was too good to be true.”

“you wound me, kitten,” he drawls, reaching up to fix his glasses. 

the condescending nickname makes your skin crawl. it carried so many awful memories of your time spent with the black cat pirates. it reminded you of just how weak kuro viewed you — nothing but a helpless, pitiful kitten in his eyes. typical of the man that abused his authority and treated you with not a single ounce of respect. 

he continues, putting on a sweet tone. “after all these years, stuck waiting hand and foot on that spoiled brat, there’s nothing i’d love more than to hear my favorite crew mate say my real name.”

you snap at him. “i’m no crew mate of yours.”

he sighs, dramatically. “sadly, you’re correct. after all, you did slip off the ship the moment we docked in shells town. locating you on an island crawling with marines proved to be nearly impossible. we had no choice but to leave without you.”

“that’s exactly why i chose to escape there.” 

“and to this day i can’t for the life of me figure out why you would ever do that. why would you want to leave us? leave me?”

you actually laugh right in his face. “is it really that hard to figure out? you were evil. you threatened and harassed me on a daily basis.”

“so your solution was to join that ragtag crew?” he glances at the table. “it’s pathetic, even for you.”

you lean into his face, lowering your voice down. “i’m happier than i ever was on your shitty crew. every day i wake up grateful that i managed to escape you.”

you see that vein on his forehead bulge before he’s gripping you by the chin. “listen here, you little bitch–”

the shiny silver of a sword slides between you and kuro, coming to rest against his neck. his adam’s apple bobs as he gulps anxiously, releasing you. thanks to zoro’s sword, it seemed as if he finally remembered where he was. you were no longer on his ship, he was no longer allowed to treat you like the dirt he walked on. not without someone noticing, that is. 

“why don’t you step away?” zoro offers simply.

that much was a kindness. usually those who found themselves on the end of zoro’s blade(s) weren’t lucky enough to receive a warning. however, the swordsman didn’t wish to cause a scene. at least not when you were right there and everyone was watching with shock from the dinner table.

kuro obliges, stumbling back. he meets kaya’s horrified eyes, feeling ashamed that he allowed his act to slip. surely this would cause some setbacks in his plan. with no excuse for his uncharacteristic behavior, the raven haired man scurries away and up the stairs.

zoro turns and locks eyes with luffy, giving him one singular nod. luffy returns it, jumping out of his seat and going after the butler. quiet murmuring breaks out at the dinner table, everyone surely confused. 

sheathing his sword, zoro directs his attention to you once more. “are you alright?” a calloused hand comes up to grip your chin, much like kuro had. however, this time, the touch is gentle. loving, almost. you welcome it.

“yeah, i’m… fine.” your heart is beating out of your chest and it has everything to do with your close proximity to zoro.

he tilts your face around, inspecting every inch of it. once he finishes, he pulls back. his demeanor goes serious once more. “we need to have a talk.”

you nod. “i know. i’ve been keeping some things from you guys and–”

“just tell me what’s been going on,” he demands. “and don’t overcomplicate it. you can be straightforward with me.”

his sincerity makes you start over, this time far more candidly. “klahadore used to be a pirate. i was part of his crew. he was my… captain.”

the shame in your voice pulls at zoro’s heartstrings. didn’t you know there was no reason to feel guilty with him? “is that it?” 

you open your mouth to speak but come up empty. all you can do is furrow your eyebrows at his unexpectedly dismissive reaction.

“i knew it,” zoro continues, annoyed. “i knew i’d seen him on a wanted poster before. just didn’t have any proof.”

“wait, so you don’t– you really don’t care?” you ask, still avoiding eye contact. “me being a former black cat pirate doesn’t bother you?”

he shrugs. “you said it yourself. ‘former.’ all that matters is that you got the hell out of there. and away from that creep. would he always put his hands on you like that?”

you blink a couple times, sighing. “his temper was really bad so–”

that seemed to be enough for zoro. “i’ll kill the bastard,” he hisses. “wanted to slice him to bits the moment i saw him grab you.” 

though it’s a violent threat, you can’t help but smile. the idea of zoro being so protective that he’d kill a man just for touching you made you blush. pirate love language, you suppose.

“well, i wouldn’t have stopped you,” you tell him, more than ready to see your former captain go.

zoro clicks his tongue. “nah. could’ve stained your new dress with his blood. i never would have been able to forgive myself.”

“so you do have a soft spot,” you tease.

“only for pretty things.”

“do you mean me or the dress?” 

now it’s zoro’s turn to become bashful. though, his lack of response is an answer in itself. you can’t help but giggle. 

a loud bang from upstairs interrupts your moment with the green-haired man. you assume luffy had gotten his hands on kuro… or vice versa. zoro must be thinking the same thing judging by the way he instinctively rests a hand on the handle of his blade.

“you should go up there,” you tell him. “i’ll stay with kaya.”  

he gives you a nod, though he doesn’t make any effort to leave. he stands there like he wants to say something… or do something. before you can think about it too much, you pull him in by the collar and crash your lips onto his. they’re slightly chapped and taste like the wine that’d come from the cellar – it’s pleasant. his large palms come to rest on your lower back; his hold feels tight and secure. 

when you finally allow yourself to pull away, you’re biting back a smile. “kick his ass for me.” 

“will i get more of that if i do?” asks zoro, wetting his lips. they now taste like the cherry lip gloss you’d borrowed from kaya. he takes a step forward, attempting to close the gap between you two once more.

you shrug, pushing him away by the chest. “go help luffy and we’ll see.”

you both know that means yes.

[beemo-clippin]

Presentiiinngg *drumrolls* Favorite Etho + Bdubs moments of HC10! (Video length: 3:36 min)

There will most definitely be a part two at some point, so I would love to hear any of your favorite moments which I may include there ^-^

Video credit in order of appearance: Bdubs Ep.8 (23:20); Etho Ep. 2 (17:33); Bdubs Ep.6 (7:23); Bdubs Ep.2 (16:00); Etho Ep.3 (6:50); Bdubs Ep.7 (0:56); (1:53); Bdubs Ep.14 (27:19); Bdubs Ep.2 (15:23); Etho Ep.1 (7:17); Bdubs Ep.9 (2:41); Bdubs Ep.2 (16:13); Etho Ep.1 (8:41); Bdubs Ep.2 (16:58).

Bc of the length, the video description for this one is available by request, so please lmk if you would like one!!

Transcription is below cut:

*intro music*

--- 0:05 ---

[Etho] I don't know if you know RBG values but like more like a hundred green

[Bdubs] I don't know if you know HSL

[Etho] *laughs* [Bdubs] but- *laughs*

[Etho] Hue, saturation, luminescence?

[Bdubs] That would be- yeah! Yeah. So that would be a 50L

[Bdubs] "I don't know if you know RGB"

[Etho] *laughs* [Bdubs] *giggles*

[Etho] Well apparently you go HSL not- not RGB, uh huh

[Bdubs] Yeah, HSL's the, uh… that's the, uh, primary

[Etho] The artist standard, you know, yeah

[Bdubs] Yes. This is beautiful

[Etho] Someone that truly understands art

[Bdubs] That's right [Etho] Mhm

--- 0:34 ---

*mischevious music*

[Bdubs] Hullo?

[Etho] Bdubs?

[Bdubs] Woah! *laughs* You're in- you're inside?!

[Etho] Ah I was waiting for you, I decided I would just walk in, you know

[Bdubs] That's so rude, you brought the horse in?

[Etho] Does- does he not belong in here?

[Bdubs] The horse has never been in this house

[Etho] I saw the haybales in here, I thought it was like a-

[Bdubs] No, that's a carpet

[Etho] *chuckles*

[Bdubs] Out! Out. Out

[Etho] Not horse food?

[Bdubs] No. [Etho] Okay, okay

[Bdubs] No, stop it see! Look what happened

--- 1:07 ---

*gentle piano*

[Bdubs] I love this area

[Etho] You got the pink tree

[Bdubs] Yeah

--- 1:11 ---

[Bdubs] This might be pushing it for you, a little bit. I don't want to push you too hard

[Etho] Mhm. You thinking about texturing the floor?

[Bdubs] *laughs*

[Etho] But I can texture too like, I know how to texture

[Bdubs] Yeah yeah yeah! Oh I know you can. I- I know. I know that too much is uncomfortable

[Etho] Mhm

[Bdubs] Right?

[Etho] I- I don't know what it is

[Etho] Like I like it when you do it

[Bdubs] Sure, yeah. But it can be too much.

[Bdubs] Yeah. It's more for advanced H- *laughs* HSL type people

[Etho] *laughs*

--- 1:44 ---

*chill music*

[Bdubs] That roof, It's less than a forty-five degree angle. It's like a-

[Etho] It's flatter right?

--- 1:51 ---

[Bdubs] I'm soo… puffed up as a builder. Okay

[Etho] Mhm

[Bdubs] that you can say anything and it won't hurt me. I can take it

[Etho] I feel like you need, like, some… semi-rooves lower down like, like at the four-five block height… kinda thing. You know what I mean? Like those little overhangs to something underneath

[Bdubs] I thought I could take it and I can't

[Etho] *laughs* Oh no, I crushed him

[Bdubs] *laughs*

--- 2:21 ---

*inspired piano music*

[Etho] Look at that build

[Bdubs] Come on now

--- 2:25 ---

*gentle piano and distant chatter*

--- 2:31 ---

[Bdubs] Jevin, Ethan, I'm coming. er, Etho. Ethan? Ethan

[Etho] Ethan? [Jevin] Ethan!

[Etho] Ethan hunt! [Jevin] Ethan I'm coming!

--- 2:36 ---

*silly music*

[Etho] Okay connected. *laughs* What??

[Bdubs] Oh noo!!

[Etho] *laughs* I have never seen anything like that before

[Bdubs] It's worse!

[Etho] *laughing* How is that possible?

--- 2:49 ---

*wither shriek*

[Bdubs] Wait! You hear that?

[Etho] Is that cub? Oh I think Cub's after you

[Bdubs] It could be Hypno *wither shriek*

[Etho] Oh my goodness *wither shriek*

[Etho] Oh my goodness, they're coming Bdubs *wither shriek*

[Etho] They're coming!

[Bdubs] It could be Hypno!

*wither shriek*

[Bdubs] Oh it's you!!

[Etho] *laughs*

[Bdubs] Ohhh!

[Etho] *laughs* [Bdubs] *laughs*

--- 3:09 ---

[Etho] Alright, we're gonna go by seniority here. Bdubs

[Bdubs] Yea- hahaha. *whispers* youu. You!! [Jevin] Wow

[Etho] *laughs*Lead the way [Jevin] Woww

[Bdubs] *laughs* [Jevin] *laughs*

[Bdubs] Ohh

[Etho] Was that not respectful? I thought that was a respectful thing to do

[Bdubs] No it's very respectful to your elders. It was very good

[Etho] I don't understand some things about social dynamics, I tell you

[Bdubs] *laughs*

--- 3:31 ---

[Etho] If you're ever bored or- or lonely on the server Bdubs, come hit me up

[Bdubs] Oh yes. Okay. Thank you

<end transcription>

[shelleysmary]

okay, but in all seriousness, is elrond being too hard on galadriel? the answer is yes. but he is also much younger than her and i think a lot of us can relate to that feeling of being in our early-to-mid-20s and feeling like "right is here, and wrong is there, and why can't these older people see it." sometimes that kind of clarity is needed. this is why generational friction exists, is natural, is necessary to the movements of society. elrond standing up to galadriel and gil-galad after spending s1 mostly in service to them is refreshing because he's finding his voice, he's owning the fact that he is not content to be a herald writing and delivering speeches for others. he cares and he wants to make a difference and speaking out against the rings has been the catalyst for that. at this point in the story elrond is already so many of the things he goes on to be in the third age. he is loyal. he is perceptive. he is wise. but he also lacks experience. he has never been tempted away from the light - probably ever, certainly not by the great deceiver. so it's easy for him to look at galadriel's folly and say "you should have known better. the darkness corrupted you and you let it happen, in part because you wanted it to happen." which technically is a true statement, but the way it feels to galadriel is much different and much more complex, and it's different to us as well because we've been with her every step of the way. we were also seduced by sauron - we were also deceived. but elrond wasn't there. he knows that sauron manipulated his friend; he doesn't know how deeply that manipulation affected her and affects her still, in no small part because galadriel contains a lot of her grief in order to fulfill her roles of commander and self-appointed bulwark against sauron.

we see her in eps1 and 2 desperately trying to make elrond understand her, but elrond doesn't want to hear it. he is frustrated at not being listened to, disappointed in gil-galad and galadriel's willingness to engage with the rings (which, to him, is equivalent to engaging with sauron, for all that he had no hand in their forging), and i would posit that he is also afraid. for middle-earth. for his friends. for himself. because his clarity of vision is being challenged, the right way is becoming obscured, and the stakes have never been higher.

in time, he will learn how easy it is to fall prey to the darkness and - like miv said in an interview - it will make him kinder. the elrond we know in the third age is devoted to healing, unburdening, and the practice of an extraordinary compassion. but those qualities aren't built-in to anyone, not even the first children of iúvatar, not even elrond. they are hard-won - through mistakes made, failures to act as one should. it's natural that he would hurt people along the way - and he has! see durin in s1! what we do know about elrond in the second age is that he tries his best to do good: to act rightly, to keep his word, to seek counsel when he is unsure of the way, to serve all middle-earth and not just elven-kind, to be true to his friends, honor his family... and he isn't afraid to admit when he's been wrong.

if these first eps are any indication, elrond's arc is going to keep carving him into the elf he later becomes and his relationship with galadriel, after these growing pains, is going to come out even stronger, with the mutual trust and near-telepathic understanding we're used to seeing from them in third age media, and i for one can't wait.

[angelicdanvers]

BREATHE DEEPER | five.

a charlie bushnell x fem!reader social media fic.

levizmiller

liked by y/n, dior.n.goodjohn, leahsavajeffries, and others

levizmiller — she won at pool. again.

tagged | y/n

y/n hey at least we got drinks ↳ levizmiller true ↳ walker.scobell YOU CAN DRINK??? ↳ y/n technically yes BUT i settle for virgins

dior.n.goodjohn best duo loading?! ↳ levizmiller YES

user i lowk shipp ↳ user2 nah they prob friends ↳ user3 ay no need to speculate 😭

y/n

liked by levizmiller, dior.n.goodjohn, walker.scobell, and others

y/n — prep for the jumpscare at the end

tagged | levizmiller

levizmiller 😭

walker.scobell i wanna be your age ↳ y/n in like five years buddy

walker.scobell also levizmiller your physique is ELITE ↳ levizmiller thank you walker :)

leahsavajeffries YOU GUYS ARE SO COOL ↳ y/n that’s our goal >:)

iamcharliebushnell hope ur having fun! ↳ y/n thanks!

dior.n.goodjohn YOURE SO HOT ↳ y/n BABES YOU ALL YOU

user2 not charlie becoming less and less consistent ↳ user4 fr man this is sad

GALILEO’S GALS

forbidden child added cutie patootie

↳ HI ARYAN OKAY SO UH I NEED YALLS HELP i think you guys were right

cutie patootie aw what’s wrong?

chanel’s enemy uh oh

↳ yeaaah so is charlie mad at me??? for hanging out with levi?

lee lee he shouldn’t be, he doesn’t have a reason to because even tho all of us are close it’s still your life yk

chanel’s enemy i second that, and if he does that also means SOMETHING if yk what i mean

dr dre im not even gonna sugarcoat, his comment seems so passive 😭

↳ welp i’ve screwed up big time 😃

cutie patootie i mean he’s okay around walker and i. he did keep talking about you at one point last night when we were watching moon knight literally made us pause the ep and just spoke of you

chanel’s enemy BRO UR GONNA HAVE TO SAY MORE ELSE WE’LL JUST ASSUME HE’S GOT A CRUSH ON HER

cutie patootie idk bro it just seemed to me that he missed her a lot. he kept saying how he wanted to take her to egypt esp a restaurant by the pyramids considering y/n still hasn’t been and other places

chanel’s enemy ong he deffo should if he likes her, he should actually ask her out before anyone else does take her to a nice lil restaurant, get her flowers, whatnot

cutie patootie yeah fr

↳ yall pls tell me youre not speculating he likes me

dr dre omfg Y/N ARE YOU PAYING ATTENTION TO ANY OF THESE DETAILS

↳ yes but im choosing to ignore them for the sake of my sanity

lee lee GIRL HE PROBABLY LIKES YOU IF IT ISNT THAT, THEN ITS BECAUSE WALKER SAID LEVI’S PHYSIQUE WAS GREAT AND HE ONLY EVER USED TO SAY THAT TO CHARLIE

↳ YEAH BUT CHARLIE’S MATURE

dr dre is he tho guys do dumb shit when they like a girl

↳ he doesnt like me 😭

cutie patootie ANYWAYS i'd keep my eyes and ears open if i were you, y/n, you definitely didn’t screw up but if you're worried abt charlie maybe just be a tad bit more careful?

↳ gotcha, no more levi posts then?

chanel’s enemy i mean ofc you can post him, it shouldn't be anyone's business as to who you're posting, but idk it's so hard to explain like don't get me wrong i think you should post whomever you wish but hopefully it won't hurt anyone. i mean you're not with anyone controversial so it shouldn't be a big deal anyways, plus if someone cough charlie cough can't fess up their feelings it's on THEM not YOU

↳ i definitely get that, thank you for the insight you guys :) it’s just tough because i really don’t know how i feel either

chanel’s enemy WAIT WHAT i did NOT expect that response

↳ i can't help it idk my emotions are all over the place right now

chanel’s enemy GIRL YOURE NOT A BOP STOP ACTING LIKE ONE

↳ RIGHT SORRY 💀 K PLEASE HELP THO

cutie patootie okok miss y/n do you, or do you not, have a crush on levi?

↳ i do not

chanel’s enemy okok MISS y/n l/n would you rather be MRS. y/n bushnell?

↳ DIOR WTF MAN

dr dre well THAT got a reaction out of her

↳ ugh but he's cute and he’s so sweet and he’s so charming too he texts me every morning no matter what timezone i’m in and he gave my mom flowers when he first met her too he’s so smart, both emotionally and intellectually like doing math with him is just >>>>

lee lee girl. GIRL.

chanel’s enemy LMFAOOO MATH 💀 she down bad BAD

dr dre you see there’s a river in egypt…

cutie patootie AND YOU STILL THINK THIS IS PLATONIC??

↳ OKAY OKAY fuck i like charlie don’t i

chanel’s enemy OH YOU DO YOU DEFINITELY DO

cutie patootie YOU LITERALLY WORRY ABOUT HOW HE FEELS ABOUT YOU ABOUT THE PEOPLE YOU HANG OUT WITH YOU'RE DOWN BAD N/N

↳ aw shit man WHAT DO I DO

chanel's enemy MAKE A SUBTLE MOVE ASAP

lee lee HANG OUT WITH HIM SOON

dr dre MAKE A SHORT FILM

cutie patootie YES THATS PERFECT

↳ guys this is too hard i dont like this

chanel's enemy STFU YOU WILL DO THIS WE ARE HERE BAE 💪

↳ OKOK LOVE YOU GUYS LEMME TRY THIS OUT

— taglist.

@shokocoded @istillremeberthefirstfallofsnow @surftrips @svtsimp22 @thames-fig @captainshischier @reggieslifeboat @multifandom-loser @wheelerslover @mermaid-mqtel @randomnpc456 @kaithoughs @isab3lita @mariposa555 @sunshinessky @myr-cheri @thedeadlynights @ella33 @c1nn4mng1rl @poppysrin @breadbrobin @lucy-the-ant @jules-loves-lukecastellan @taloulalila @tom-pls-fuck-me @mia-luvs @iknowyoureabigfan @rinisfruity14 @chasebeth @auttumnsayshi @prettygirlformula @alwayswndr @balletfilmss @kestisvrse @1forthemoney2forthekish @eissaaaa @emelia07 @toffytaste @soulaires @bearwon @happy-mushrooms @simrah1012 @blimp-blimp @obxstiles @yuminako @hopexcroc @mackycat11 @knowugetdejavu @0puddleofgender0 @callsignwidow @i-heart-emos @eddiesdrummergf @suckerforblondies @homebyeleven @bookworm-center @kawliflo @https-evan2 @ihrtzku @strawberryapplesauce13 @captainshischier @vbbaby-girl @honeysmoonn @itssmandiee @kinderwh0r3 @willsdills @americanbluebirdrb @bokutos-biddys @ln4author @lqclercs @czennieszn @laveens-pearl @inlovewithcarsthatrunreallyfast @aerangi @taygrls @ilamara @hanjiiberry

hi my loves! i am so so sorry for disappearing for a bit, school was getting horrible during the second semester and i found very little motivation. i rested all of july and i am hoping to update this series, along with posting a luke one i've written for the past few months, throughout this month! i think i've mostly tagged all the people that requested to be a part of the taglist, forgive me if i missed you or tagged you twice.

how are you guys doing?

please stay safe and drink water, i'm proud of you <333

[lustspren]

STARBOY EP 3. Earned It ft Kazuha.

length: 13.3k words.✦

Nakamura Kazuha & Male Reader. 

genres: slutty brat¡ kazuha, bdsm, daddy kink, angry sex, public sex, dirty talk, hard sex, face fuck, creampie, blowjob, oral ✧ 

✦✧✦✧✦✧

It was a pretty typical stereotype that men hate going shopping with a woman, and you certainly couldn't deny it, most of your friends in the past hated it, but for some reason you enjoyed it. And of course you more than anyone knew the reason.

Having Heejin as a shopping partner was undoubtedly an experience that was anything but boring, wherever you followed her she would attract you with a bright and fun aura that you couldn't even get tired of, no matter what she did. You didn't want to jump to conclusions too quickly, but maybe you were somewhat, just a little, in love with her. Of course this wasn't even a hidden feeling in you, the connection you had with that girl was more than special, she was like your other half, and your safe place, not to mention that without her you were literally living on the street right now. You owed a lot to her, and this was the least you could do to repay her for everything she has done for you.

That day you had gone out exclusively to buy clothes to remodel almost your entire closet. You needed it more than she did, but still most of the stops you were having were because of her. Right now you were at a Fendi store, which was in the mall a few blocks from your building. Your job was simple, you had to answer yes or no every time she came out of the fitting room with a new item of clothing to find out if she bought it or not. You were already full of bags, in which you could be easily buried, but even so, it didn't seem enough to her. At least it was a nice enough place to wait, otherwise you would have been overwhelmed with so many things to keep an eye on. 

Miss Lee had been giving you fashion advice for a few days, in your last session she forced you to try on multiple different outfits, each one with clothes from brands that until weeks ago you could only see on instagram or pinterest. She let you keep all the clothes that you liked, but still she ordered you to update your closet as fast as you could, and so you did. This day you were wearing a blue Ralph Lauren sweater tucked into champagne Zara pants, vanilla Balenciaga Triple S shoes and a blue Patek watch, you were completely unaware of the exact model, surely Sunmi would know, but you were new to all of that.  Most importantly, you'd killed two birds with one stone, you pleased your boss, and finally shaken off the judgmental stares of everyone around you while still feeling comfortable with yourself.

While you were sitting on a sofa looking at twitter on your phone Heejin came out of the changing room and looked your way, she was wearing a whole complete outfit: a strappy champagne corset, brown wide leg pants with pink striped plaid pattern, and white pointed heels, all complemented by rectangular sunglasses and a brown velvet handbag with the Fendi buckle in the middle. 

The first thing you thought was that she looked incredibly hot with that corset that highlighted her breasts and prominent shoulders, but when you thought a little more you couldn't help noticing something very important.

"Wait wait wait wait, you know how much is that handbag, right?" you said, pointing at it with your finger still glued to the phone.

"Uhm… how much?" she asked innocently.

"1.400 bucks. I saw it just now."

"Oh..." she looked at the bag for a few seconds, in all directions, and then saw it hanging on her arm, "but can we take it or not?" she said finally, with a smirk and a tilt of her head.

You brought your fingers to your septum and closed your eyes to let out a long breath, knowing you had no choice.

"Sure, take it," you finally said, looking up at her again.

"Yaaay!" she clapped excitedly for a moment, "and how about the outfit? Yes or no?"

"It's definitely a yes," you held up your thumb.

"I knew it!" she jumped towards you and cupped your face to steal a kiss from you. She then turned back to the dressing room, leaving you alone again.

As soon as Heejin entered the dressing room, your phone's screen turned on showing the message that just arrived. You unlocked your phone, and sighed as you read the entire message.

Japan Justice Minister, you went over it several times in your head. You didn't know why, but you had the feeling that everything was escalating way too fast, you went from fucking a CEO, then a shareholder, and now the daughter of a Japanese politician. And you, well, you were just a lucky guy. As usual, the intrusive thoughts and your anxiety took over again for a few minutes. This time the pressure was twice as strong as when Sunmi or Tiffany, on top of that, you were going to face a girl who was going to potentially drive you out of your mind in a bad way, and your tolerance was something, you would say quite limited. You didn't know how spoiled she was, but your protocol (which you just made up just now) for girls like that was very simple: don't give them what they want.

You waited a few minutes for Heejin, and when she came out, she was dressed in the same clothes she had worn to come to the mall in the first place.

"That's it! Let's pay," Heejin said, checking that she had all the clothes she had tried on, "Uhm, is something wrong?" she asked, noticing that you were chewing on your thumbnail with a blank stare.

"I have to go, Miss Lee wants to see me so I can meet my next client," you said, still staring at nothing.

"And what is the problem?" she stood in front of you.

"The girl in question is the daughter of a minister of justice," when you said it you couldn't help but let out a small incredulous laugh.

"Oof. Big fish..."

"Aha, it still seems fucking surreal to me, to be honest, but I guess that's the way it is now," you sighed, then looked at her, "I'll have to get used to it. Let's go," you nodded to the cashier and you got up.

When you paid for the clothes, the first thing you did was count everything you were carrying, to make sure nothing was missing, and it wasn't until then that you realized that you were carrying a somewhat exaggerated number of bags, so exaggerated that you even doubted that they were even going to fit in the elevator with you. You put your mind to plot for a moment to try to calculate how much you had spent on all that, but if you started counting everything you were probably going to arrive late for your meeting with Sunmi, and that wasn’t an option, so you just took out your phone to call the taxi and then take as many bags as you could in your two hands, just like Heejin.

"What could be the daughter of a Japanese politician here in Korea?" Heejin asked as you walked towards the exit.

"I don't know," you shrugged, "but Miss Lee told me they were in a photo shoot, maybe it has something to do."

"Maybe she is a photographer?"

"Nah," you shake your head denying, "based on how little I know about her, I don't think photography is her thing."

"Hmm…" she thought about it for a few seconds, "Model, then, I can't think of anything else."

"Probably, we'll see."

When you arrived at the exit and left the mall, you stayed waiting for the taxi for just under 5 minutes until it finally arrived. You barely put all the bags in the trunk of the car, forced to stack them on top of each other and crush them so that they could fit all there.

"We need a car, fuck," Heejin sighed, "a SUV, if possible."

"Maybe if we stopped buying 1.400 dollars handbags we could save and buy one," you looked at her without even blinking.

"Oh come on! It was Fendi!" she excused herself, before you ignored her and sat at the backseat, "you bought an almost 1.000 clock and I'm not upset about it. In fact, you're wearing it!"

"It's different," you said, watching out the window as she sat next to you and closed the car door.

"In what?" she crossed her arms as she saw you.

"It cost almost 500 bucks less," you chuckled, waiting for the blow to your arm.

"Ah fuck you!" she complained, hitting you on your arm, in the same exact area where she always did. You didn't even immute you, you had developed a kind of mental immunity to the pain of her punches.

Being your building so few blocks away the trip was just under 3 minutes, in fact, you could easily have walked there, but the amount of laziness that gave you loading with all the bags beat you. When you arrived you paid the driver and got off the car, to download all the bags and enter the building. Entering the elevator with all the bags was less difficult than you expected, in fact, you didn’t even have to make two trips up and down as you imagined from the beginning, however, if someone else wanted to enter the elevator at that time, it was going to be necessary to wait.

When you got to your floor you were the first to go ahead since you had the keys, you opened the door, and went straight to the living room to put all the bags on the sofa, while Heejin left them on the floor between the coffee table and the sofa. .

"You know, I think we should adopt a cat," she said out of nowhere.

"What? Why?" you frowned in confusion as you walked towards the door again.

"I don't know, I feel a little lonely every time you leave..." Heejin bited on her bottom lip, arms folded and looking sad, "this whole place is so big, and well… you know ."

"Oh Hekkie..." you breathed out, to walk towards her and hold her by the waist, "I'm so sorry, okay?"

"No, not at all, it's not your fault, silly," she laughed a little discouraged, "it's your job now, do your best for me," she gave you a little pat on the chest, and then she gave you a little kiss on the lips, "I just need some company while you're gone, that's all."

"We're going to an adoption center tomorrow, okay?" you cupped her face with your hands, "take care of finding out places."

"Okay," she nodded, like the spoiled child she sometimes was, "be careful, okay?"

"Always," you gave her a kiss on the forehead, and then another on her lips, before turning around and walking out of the apartment.

You didn't know how late you were going to arrive at the place Sunmi had ordered you to go to, which worried you. You ordered the taxi as fast as you could while you walked to the elevator, and you checked that you had everything you needed on you. When you got to the street you couldn't help but think that Heejin was right, you needed a car urgently.

Luckily for you the taxis in that place were anything but late, they arrived much faster than the average taxi did, but you came to the conclusion that it must simply be the same old problem, classism in its purest form.

-----------------------------

The taxi dropped you right in front of the executive building to which they had sent you, just as you imagined it was a production company and a photo studio, from the outside you couldn't see much of it, but when you entered you were amazed at the tremendous relevance of the place. The lobby was littered with photos, all of them with captions indicating the brand that had done their shoots right there; Adidas, Under Armour, Puma, Calvin Klein...

"Good afternoon, miss," you approached the receptionist, a pretty girl under 25 years  by your reckoning. << Seo Soojin >>, said the little card attached to her shirt. She wore glasses, her hair tied up in a bun, and a rather intense crimson lipstick that highlighted her thick lips. The moles she had under her eye and next to her nose also caught your attention.

"Good afternoon sir, how can I help you?" she said, looking at you over the top of her glasses.

"I'm headed to the studio, huh…" you checked your phone again, "6."

"Are you a model? Staff member? Photographer?" she raised an eyebrow.

"Oh no, nothing like that," you denied, "I'm close friends with Miss Lee and Miss Nakamura."

"I see," she nodded and looked down at her landline, "one minute please," she said as she took the phone, you kept quiet as you looked at her, assuming she was calling someone, "Hello? Yes, excuse me, there's a guy at the reception who claims to be close friends with Miss Lee and Miss Nakamura... Ok... Ok got it, you're welcome."

"Well?"

"Here," she opened a drawer in her desk and pulled out a necklace with a laminated card that read <<guest>>, "fourth floor to the right, easy enough to find," she said, handing you the card.

"Thanks, Soojin," you nodded your head in appreciation and took the card to go straight to the elevator.

You followed the receptionist's instructions until you arrived at the aforementioned studio 6, the door was made of opaque glass that allowed you to see almost nothing other than the flash of the cameras going off and the light from the spotlights. The door wasn't locked, so you just walked in freely. The studio was quite spacious and cozy, with black curtains that completely covered all the windows and air conditioning at the perfect temperature. There were fewer people than you thought there would be, only 5 staff members and a sturdy man in a suit sitting on a sofa at the back of the room, they all stared at you when you closed the door behind you, but seeing the card hanging from your neck they continued with their thing.

"Hi… hi… hi," you said aloud, bowing to each person as you walked to where the flashes were coming from.

As you crossed the division between the two studio areas, you found yourself blinded for a moment by the light from one of the spotlights, so much so that at first glance you couldn't notice everything; when your eyes cleared up you were finally able to take a look at the minimalist set they had assembled. There was a large furry sofa placed right in the middle of the white screen that covered both the wall and the floor for a few feet, with a couple of cushions in the middle and a jean jacket that belonged to the incredibly hot and stunning woman who was sitting and posing on the sofa. In black Calvin Klein underwear and white socks.

"Oh, you're finally here," Lee Sunmi said, noticing your presence and motioning for the photographer to stop for a moment.

"Yes, sorry if I'm late, Miss Lee," you bowed to her, after nearly choking on how she'd seen you and how she was (or was not) dressed.

"Not at all, you're actually just on time," she stood up and slowly walked over to stand in front of you, one of her hands resting on your chest and the other on your left arm, moving both from up and down while analyzing your outfit, "now you dress appropriately, nice outfit, boy."

"I'm glad you like it," you giggled nervously at how close she was, maybe you weren't quite used to how imposing she was yet, "nice underwear, by the way, you look amazing."

"Thanks, but you don't have to pretend you weren't looking at my tits while I was walking towards you," you didn't answer, you didn't even realize you had until she told you, "anyway, there's someone you have to meet, remember?" she asked tilting her head to the other side of the room, "Hey, Zuha! Our partner is here."

From behind one of the spotlights a girl just inches taller than Sunmi came out, much more covered than you expected; she was wearing a slightly short jean skirt, a white crop top shirt with the Calvin Klein logo, and black sneakers and white socks with the same logo. You couldn't help but fix your attention on the girl’s unreally gorgeous face and on how perfect her dark shiny hair looked, after that you did focus on the slender figure she had, giving special attention to her incredibly hot abs that managed to hypnotize you in the moment.

"Damn, you really are as handsome as she told me," was the first thing Kazuha said as she stood next to Sunmi and looked you up and down, "Nakamura Kazuha," she held out her hand for you to shake, "And you're... Starboy, huh?"

"My pleasure, yes," you said, shaking her hand and meeting her eyes with a small smile.

"I can call you whatever I want, right?" her look denoted her intentions from the first instance, and you were sure that yours did too.

"I think that depends," you noticed in Kazuha a certain different energy from Sunmi and Tiffany's, a more playful, fun and spicy one, so you decided to take certain liberties, "what do you want to call me, baby?"

Kazuha raised both eyebrows for a second and smiled while biting her lower lip. Something about that she had liked, and you suspected that it was that you called her baby.

"Miss Lee?" Kazuha said without looking at her.

"Yeah?" Sunmi replied.

"I wanna taste him, here and now," that took you by surprise, so you looked at Sunmi somewhat stunned.

"Kazuha, you know that we are in a photo studio, right? There are people here. You’re not even gonna talk with him?" Sunmi asked.

"I don't care! I want to suck his cock before I take him with me all night, we will have a lot of time to talk" she stepped back and cupped both hands to either side of her mouth, "Everyone get out of here right now! We need a moment alone and no one is allowed to enter until I say so!" Kazuha said very loudly, for everyone inside the room to hear.

As soon as Kazuha gave the order, you could see how everyone quickly left the room, including the man you saw sitting a moment ago, who looked at you for a second before leaving. You didn't know what the hell was going on, your mind couldn't assimilate the fact that until less than five minutes ago you had just had your first contact with her and she already wanted to give you head, but maybe you should have expected it.

"God, this girl," Sunmi murmured as she sighed, and then she went to sit cross-legged on the sofa.

"You don't mind, do you?" Kazuha grabbed the collar of your sweater with one finger and moved a dangerous distance to your face, "It'll just be a little… quality test."

"Nah, just choke on that cock if you want," you replied, looking at her lips and then her eyes.

"Yes..." she paused to get a little closer, until almost touching her lips with yours, "Daddy," listening that she called you that way, from so close, and with her deep voice woven in a low sensual murmur, made all your senses activate at the same time and make you completely crazy. There was something in that girl that you couldn't identify, but you had the slight feeling that you were going to become addicted to her.

When Kazuha put her hand on your chest and went down to your pants she found that you already had a hard bulge on it, that among all the sexual tension of the situation you didn’t realize was there, you just had been paying attention to the girl’s cute playful eyes.

"Oh! You're hard already daddy," Kazuha teased you with a false surprise, "I bet you've been horny since you saw Miss Sunmi's tits."

Kazuha squeezed your cock slightly over your pants and began to remove her shirt and skirt, leaving herself in a set of underwear exactly like Sunmi's. Her body was almost as perfect as a Renaissance sculpture, and you took special time to admire her marked and delicious abs, her attractive shoulders and arms, and her long creamy legs.

You would have put your hands on her right then and there, if it weren't for her kneeling in front of you as soon as she knew you had already taken a look at her body in all its fullness. She looked into your eyes with a little mischievous smile, as she began to massage your cock over your pants again, while her other hand was attached to your right thigh.

"Tell me, Miss Lee, how do he like blowjobs?" asked Kazuha without seeing Sunmi, instead concentrating on unbuttoning your pants and lowering your zipper.

"Just suck his cock, brat, no matter how you do it," Sunmi said, without paying too much attention since she was looking at her nails, "he's already crazy about you, anyway he's going to like it."

"Ah yes?" Kazuha teased you, "is daddy so crazy about me that fast? I haven't even done anything..." the girl grabbed her fingers to the curbs of your pants and boxers and lowered them to your knees, thus releasing your hard cock that was now resting on her face, "Yet."  

Kazuha took your cock between her fingers and took a moment to analyze every inch of it, she planted a kiss, then two, and then began to plant her lips from your tip to your balls, being down there she stuck out her tongue and put it flat against your balls, to go slowly along your entire length back to your tip. She and you shared stares throughout that moment, even when your cock was locked by her mouth just a few inches after the tip.

You couldn't help but let out the faint sigh that came out of your mouth as Kazuha began to suck a few inches from you, her fingers were wrapped around the base of your cock, and her back was slightly arched so you could see her prominent, firm ass as she sucked more and more inches from your cock until she reached the middle.

"Mmm, Daddy's cock is very, very delicious," she said, licking her lips and masturbating you slowly, then dipping  your cock straight back into her wet warm mouth.

This time Kazuha's lips moved a few inches past the middle of your shaft, and with most of your cock now inside her mouth she began to give you a slow, wet, sensual blowjob. She wasn't looking you in the eye anymore, her head movements and body language made it obvious that she was enjoying sucking your cock almost as much as you did.

Her moans of pleasure soon appeared, making your cock vibrate every time she made a sound, you moaned a couple of times out loud, which made Kazuha see you once again in the eyes.

"You're supposed to be her daddy now, fool, act like one," you heard Sunmi speak to your left, you saw her out of the corner of her eye, remembering that she had been watching everything from the beginning.

It was easy for her to say, you had been a simple sub for several days, the word daddy had practically disappeared from your vocabulary at this point. You hadn't acted as the dominant one for a long time, but Kazuha was worth the effort.

"That's a good fucking girl," you gasped as she looked you in the eye, causing her to start pumping her head faster, "do you like daddy's cock, baby?"

"Yes daddy, your cock is so juicy..." she said, pulling you out of her mouth for a moment, "And big... and hard, and tasty."

After she adored your cock between wet kisses and licks, Kazuha put extra effort into her blowjob to make sure you enjoyed it, and not just that you enjoyed it, that it was the best blowjob you had ever been given in your life, which was difficult to achieve considering that her competition was Jeon Heejin herself, but what you did know was that if she kept going that way, moving her head that good and sucking almost all your cock between moans, you were going to cum faster than you wanted.

You were forced to close your eyes and drop your head back, which was also not very useful since Kazuha was no longer holding your cock with her fingers, she was now clinging to your hips, daring to take those last inches of your shaft and start hitting her own throat with each pump. The gag sounds of Kazuha's throat tempted you to open your eyes and watch the lewd scene in front of you, but you wanted to hold on more, just a little longer so you wouldn't look like a weak fool. Unfortunately for you, many times you couldn't take control of your brain, and you involuntarily opened your eyes, encountering the incredibly sexy image of Kazuha choking in your cock and making a mess of saliva on the ground, and that was the bane for you.

Without even telling her or anything you suddenly burst into Kazuha's mouth, she noticed it right away, and pushed her head even further toward the base of your cock, resting her nose on your pubis as you shot all your thick load into her throat. She held you there throughout your orgasm, swallowing as much as she could until she finally pulled you out of her mouth very slowly. When your cock was freed from her lips, she stared into your eyes with eyes full of sensuality and opened her mouth, to show you the thick pool of cum that rested on her tongue. You couldn't say anything because of how amazed you were, and she just closed her mouth, swallowed it, opened it again, and magically your cum was no longer there.

"And tell me daddy... I'm a good girl?" she said, as she wiped your cock with soft, delicate licks.

You were completely stunned and enraptured by such a sensual and charming aura, so much so that it took you a moment to find your words.

"Yes you are, baby, but you must keep showing it," you hesitated for a second, but ended up caressing her cheek with the back of your hand.

"Oh, you don't need to worry about it, daddy, I'll be a good girl all night... Maybe," she chuckled, kissing the tip of your cock and then standing up.

"Are you satisfied, little whore?" asked Sunmi, clearly wanting to get rid of her.

"Oh yes I am, Miss Lee, you have very good tastes," replied Kazuha as she picked up her clothes, you for your part just pulled up your boxer and pants, and stood there not quite knowing what to do after being drained so well.

"Of course I have good tastes, for some reason I am where I am," Sunmi stood up and walked to stand next to you, "you left the ground in a mess, how do you plan to explain it?"

"I don't know and it's not my problem, I want to leave with daddy right now," Kazuha said as she put on her shirt and skirt.

"Huh? Leave?!" Sunmi looked genuinely surprised, and perhaps somewhat annoyed, "God, you're lucky enough pictures of you have already been taken," she sighed, "just get out, and take good care of him."

"Perfect, thank you mommy!" said Kazuha with a radiant smile and a small ankle lift.

Sunmi didn't answer anything, in fact, you could notice that her face turned a little red because of how Kazuha had called her, apparently it wasn't something she was supposed to say in front of you.

"Get the fuck out of here," was all Miss Lee said, earning a laugh from Kazuha, who intertwined her arm with yours and carried you with her to the exit.

"What was that?" you asked, referring to what she had called Sunmi, as the two of you rounded a corner on the way to the elevator.

"Well, let's just say you're not the only one who has something like a... different relationship with Miss Lee," Kazuha held you by the arm tightly, as if she didn't want to let you go, and the happy smile on her face denoted a certain victorious feeling in her.

"You two have...?" you started, before entering the elevator and pressing the button on the ground floor.

"Yes, I've eaten her pussy on more than one occasion, why?" she replied matter-of-factly.

"Oh, sure," you nodded, "nothing, I was just curious about it."

When you arrived on the ground floor of the building you noticed, thanks to the glass doors, that the man in a suit from a few minutes ago was already waiting for you on the sidewalk in front of the entrance. 

You passed by the front of Seo Soojin's desk, with whom you stared at each other until you left the building.

"May I ask who he is?" you whispered in Kazuha's ear, seeing the man.

"Oh, Keitaro?" she said loudly, drawing the sturdy man's attention to the two of you, arousing your nerves, "He's my bodyguard, don't worry, his only job is to prevent something bad from happening to me, he's not going to interfere."

"Then he's not going to gouge out my eyes with his thumbs?"

"If my life is in danger because of you, it's the lightest thing he's going to do," she patted you on the chest and made you walk with her to the back doors of the car. A black chrome Toyota Highlander.

Keitaro opened the rear left door for you, and Kazuha let go of your arm to get one foot in the car and get inside, you followed her, and you settled aside while the bodyguard closed the door and then took his place in the driver's seat.

"Keitaro-san, take us to the hotel, alright? I need to get ready for tonight," Kazuha ordered the man, who only nodded before starting the car and setting off through the streets of Seoul.

"I don't know if it's rude to ask, but what are you doing here in Korea?" you asked, and then you took the slight audacity to put your hand on her thigh.

"I'm sick of my father," Kazuha's gaze was set on the shiny advertisements and modern buildings, illuminating her face, "he thinks he can control me like a doll with no mind of my own."

"Did you run away? Don't you think you're getting into big trouble?" she turned to see you.

"Probably, but I don't plan to go back there in a while," she shrugged indifferently.

"And you plan to stay in a hotel all the time?"

"I just arrived, it's temporary," she made a quick move, in which she climbed on your lap and adjusted her thighs to each side of you, "Miss Lee is already helping me get an apartment."

"We'll be closer than I thought, all the time, then," you put both hands on her waist, brushing her soft skin with your fingertips slowly, while Kazuha placed her hands on each side of your neck.

"I hope that's not a bad thing for you, daddy," she joked, a malicious smile slowly forming on her face.

"Not at all," you shook your head, "that will be interesting."

Kazuha did not respond again, instead, she closed the distance between the two of you and found your lips, initiating a slow and passionate kiss which extended all the way to the hotel. Once again you felt that it was different, you had a certain special chemistry with her that you never had with any of your other clients, you didn’t know exactly what it was, but what you could confirm is that with her you felt freer, and less pressured even considering who she was. Maybe it was her energy, or her vibes, or the way she treated you and saw you, Kazuha was different.

You arrived at the hotel faster than you thought, you didn’t know if it was because you had lost track of time inside the kiss or if the road had been short, but the truth was that Keitaro was already looking for a place to park near what seemed to be one of the few 5-star hotels you knew in Seoul:  The Shilla.

"My God, how much does a night there cost?" you asked, seeing the bright name of the hotel at the top of the building.

"Not as much as you think, it's cheaper than paying for a night with you, actually," she chuckled.

"Heck, that's how expensive I am?"

"Miss Lee says you're worth every penny, and I believe her," she replied, playing with the collar of your sweater.

"Look on the bright side, maybe after tonight I'll consider no longer charging you for my services," you tried to persuade her, seeking her gaze.

"Ah yes? Interesting..." she nodded slowly, to look into your eyes, "then I'll make sure I'm a good cum dump for daddy," she whispered over your lips.

The only thing you wanted at that precise moment was to take off her clothes and fuck her hard on the thin leather of the seats, but the car stopped.

"You're provoking me more than you should, and it's gonna be a long night for you, brat," you whispered back, before Keitaro turned off the engine and got out of the car.

"Mmm, maybe, but I honestly don't care," she gently bit your lip, and then got off your lap to open the door and get out of the car.

You followed her, and locked the car door for Keitaro to lock them with the key control. Kazuha re-intertwined her arm with yours, and you walked with her inside the building before the main one, which served as a lobby and private restaurant. You were especially struck by the traditional style of the infrastructure, both the style of the roof and the height reminded you of a temple, but with a modern touch thanks to the glass walls.

"Do you want to eat something, daddy? The food here is amazing," Kazuha said as you passed between the long tables, where there were some people having their dinner.

"No thanks, I'm not hungry yet," you replied, watching people eat all kinds of dishes that you sometimes saw only in magazines.

"Are you sure? It will be a long night, if you don’t eat now, I think you should order food while I get ready to leave," as you crossed the entire food area, you reached the portal leading to the main building.

"I almost forgot, where are we supposed to go?" Kazuha let go of your arm and approached the receptionist, you couldn't hear what she said to her, but within seconds she came back with you.

"Itaewon," she replied with a smile on her face as she held your hand and carried you inside the building, "I want to see if it's as wild as people say."

"Well, it certainly is," you nodded, entering the elevator with her, who pressed the button on the top floor, "Huh? Why are we going so high?"

"They must know who my father is, do you seriously think they would let me stay in a common room?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Are you telling me you have the fucking presidential suite of this hotel?" you asked out of naivety.

"Nah," she chuckled, "It was offered to me, but it was too much. I have the deluxe suite, or the Shilla Suite, as they call it."

"Ah... sure."

When you reached the top floor Kazuha took the lead to guide you through the corridors, and finally stopped in front of the suite door, opened it, and pulled you inside with her. 

As expected, the suite was anything but modest, on its own it could already be a rentable apartment, in fact. The furniture and walls made a perfect harmony of colors, white, champagne and dark brown, so automatically your eyes felt comfortable. Just entering was the living room, which consisted of two single sofas without armbands, a long white linen sofa, and two coffee tables in between. On the right was a large TV, and after the living room a bookshelf with yellow lights and glass display cases with all kinds of valuables.

"Pretty big for one person, don't you think?" you asked, slowly walking forward as you examined every corner of the place.

"Not really, I like to have enough space," she went ahead of you and passed the portal that divided the living room from the next area of the suite, which was nothing more than a small room prior to what you thought was the main bedroom. There was a marble table with a large sculpture of a turtle in the middle, and to the left a large window showing a beautiful view of Namsan Mountain.

"And don't you think you need some company?" you asked, running your fingers over the turtle's shell as you looked at the mountain.

"So fast you want to be with me all the time, daddy? Don't let it be noticed that I'm driving you crazy," she teased you with a mischievous chuck and a radiant smile on her face as she walked past you to open the bedroom door.

"This little b..." you murmured, and then you couldn't help but smile to yourself before you followed her inside.

The bedroom had nothing to envy to the living room as far as good design was concerned, it was just as impressive and big, and the bed looked like a place where you lay down to sleep 18 hours straight. 

When you walked in Kazuha was already undressing, and you knew perfectly well that she had taken off her skirt with her back to the door just because she knew you were going to pass by in a matter of seconds, and so it was, so you got a perfect view of her gorgeous firm ass.

"Hey, don't be a peeping daddy," she said, looking over her shoulder with her back still crouching, prompting you to keep seeing her ass for a few seconds before standing up again and getting into the bathroom.

At this point that girl was doing her best to get you out of your boxes, but for now your patience, and especially your willpower, were prevailing over your desire to rip off those stupid panties and fuck her prone bone against the mattress.

You had no choice but to sit on the edge of the bed, lean back to rest your hands on the mattress and let out a sigh, seriously thinking about what to do while Kazuha was in the bathroom, you heard the sound of the shower a few seconds later, so she was not going to come out for the next few minutes nearby. You slowly gave in to boredom, so you just lay on the soft mattress and pulled out your phone to scroll Instagram while waiting.

You didn't know exactly how much time had passed, but you spent a while watching your phone screen until you heard the bathroom door open. Kazuha came out wrapped in a rather short towel, which covered only what was necessary, and once again you were mesmerized by the sensual shape of her body. She noticed you immediately, and climbed onto the bed to lie beside you, her head resting on her hand and her elbow.

"Did you miss me, Daddy?" she asked, seeing you with a playful little smile.

Before you could formulate an answer, you couldn't help but notice that in that position her towel had been lifted to almost her waist, so her buttocks were exposed and at your disposal. You couldn't see her intimate part, but if only she had turned a little, you would have been able to see that too.

"Nah, you didn't take that long," you teased her, with a small smile on your face as you looked at the ceiling.

"Oh come on!" she whimpered, "it took me half an hour, how is it possible that you didn't miss me?" she climbed on top of you and took the phone out of your hands so that you would put all your attention on her.

Kazuha completely caught you with her thighs, and you couldn't and didn't want to do anything about it. Her towel went up even more, and now her naked ass was totally exposed to you, that combined with feeling her pussy pressed against your crotch over the fabric, began to make the blood flow to your bulge.

"And why should I miss you so much, brat?" you raised an eyebrow, "do you think I have no other things to distract myself with?"

"Because I'm the only daddy's baby girl..." while saying that Kazuha brought two fingers to the fold of her towel on her chest, and slowly untangled it until she fell from her body to yours, showing you her pair of modest but incredibly sexy tits, "right?"

Your eyes almost popped out of your sockets when you saw Kazuha's completely naked body on top of you, a smile formed on your face, and when you finished scrutinizing every visible corner of her, you took a handful of her hair and pulled her towards you, so that her chest was flat against yours. Your faces inches from each other.

"I warn you, little whore, you don't want to provoke me any more than you already are," you said quietly, alternating your gaze between her lips and her eyes.

"And why not? I just want to make sure Daddy has eyes just for me," even though you were gripping her hair tightly, Kazuha managed to crack a smile full of mischief.

"I have eyes only for you right now, but you're behaving like a spoiled fucking whore," in a sharp move you turned the tables, and now you were on top of her, with a grip that had gone from being in her hair to being on her neck, not strong enough for choke her but to keep her in place. Kazuha continued with that little malicious smile, with her hand on your wrist, "don’t worry, I’m not one of those who deny their girl what she wants, but you should know that everything you are looking for right now, is gonna be returned to you, multiplied by a thousand." 

"That means daddy will really make me his cum dump?" she asked with a mischievous little brow lift, as she lifted her hips and brushed your crotch with her leg.

You watched her in complete silence for a few short seconds, until you got off top of her and got out of bed to stand by the edge of it.

"Undress me, little whore," you ordered, endowing yourself with unexplored dominant abilities. Kazuha turned her neck and stared at you for a few seconds while she was still lying down, biting her lower lip and then looking down at the bulge in your pants. 

"Yes daddy," she replied with a small smirk.

Kazuha got up, crawled towards you, and then knelt up to be at the height of your face; the girl took your sweater out of your pants while you took off your watch and left it on the bedside table next to the bed; it didn't take long for your sweater to be out of your torso, so Kazuha concentrated on unbuttoning your pants and pulling them down with everything and boxers to your ankles, where you completed the work by getting out of your shoes and then the clothes. Now both you and she were completely naked in front of each other. You took a moment to see Kazuha's perfect body again, making a small stop at her pretty, shaved pussy.

"Mmm, I think I want to have some fun first," you said, then you put two fingers in your mouth, filled them with saliva and brought them to her slit, slowly sliding them back and forth. Kazuha made the attempt to take your cock with her hand, but you quickly stopped it with a slap on her wrist, "Oh hell no. You don't have permission to grab Daddy's cock yet."

"B-but, I want to feel daddy's cock!" she whimpered, her face somewhat reddish as you started rubbing her pussy with your fingers, "I-t's not f-fair, ah..." the moans came out of her mouth alone, and as much as she wanted to keep complaining like the brat she was, the first finger you inserted inside her completely collapsed her desire to win.

Kazuha's knees became somewhat weak as you inserted the second finger inside her, so you took the opportunity to push her and make her fall on her back on the mattress, legs wide open without even asking her. You noticed from how she had her legs open that her flexibility was quite out of the ordinary, and you wanted to test it later. For now, you concentrated on kneeling right next to her, your throbbing cock floating inches above her face; you spread her legs even wider, and put your two fingers back inside her, moving them slowly at first because of how tight she felt. 

"Suck that cock, baby," Kazuha didn't even think twice, she obeyed your command immediately and caught the tip of your cock with her mouth, sucking a few inches until she reached the middle of your shaft, where she began to pump her head at a considerable pace, "that's a good girl," you congratulated her,  noticing that she hadn’t used her hands.

Her only response was to let out a small moan around your cock, to which you responded back by moving your wrist faster, your fingers completely going in and out of her pussy. You let Kazuha keep sucking your cock freely for a few more long seconds, her face was distorted with pleasure, the main point being her frowning eyebrows and blushed cheeks as she left your cock full of saliva with each pump. You continued fingering her as fast as your wrist allowed, causing your palm to continually bump into her pubis.

"Alright, that's enough brat," you stopped her, earning you a dismayed look from her, which soon turned into one of slight surprise when you started moving your hips and fucking her mouth. Your left hand went to her head, grabbing a handful of her hair and grabbing it tightly to thrust hard against her mouth.

The tip of your cock began to hit her throat with each thrust, that together with how her pussy was fucked by your fingers transformed her into a trembling mess, and when you least expected it, she turned away from your cock to let out a loud moan and succumb to her peak of pleasure. The walls of her pussy almost suffocated your fingers, which were now pumping at a slower pace as she passed her orgasm. Her legs also closed tightly, trapping your wrist for a few long seconds until her thighs relaxed.

"I'm not done with you yet, baby girl," Kazuha's body was almost asleep due to her recent orgasm, so it was easy for you to settle between her legs, hold her ankles in the air and throw them all the way back, just as you supposed, that girl was fucking flexible, and it was demonstrated by how her two ankles were now on either side of her head as if it were the most natural pose,  "Be a good girl and hold your legs there, understood?"

Kazuha gulped and nodded repeatedly as she held her legs with her arms, a lust-filled look that cried out for you to fuck her.

Your cock was already lubricated by her saliva, and her pussy was already soaked for quite a while, it was enough to rub your tip a couple of times in her slit, from top to bottom, and press forward little by little, letting her tight pussy and soft folds swallow your entire shaft, slowly, inch by inch, until you were completely inside her. A coordinated moan flooded the room, she for feeling how you filled every corner of her hole, and you for feeling how exaggeratedly tight yet soft her pussy felt, it was a difficult feeling to assimilate, but if it had been possible to put your balls also inside her, you would have done it.

You rested both your hands on the mattress on either side of her hips and leaned forward so that your face was floating above Kazuha's. She continually looked into your crotches, but when she fixed her gaze with yours was when you started pumping in and out of her wet pussy, forcing her not to look away from you for a second. 

You were kind of delicate with her at first because you wanted to feel carefully the soft texture of her pussy walls and how they tightened around your axis, but the desire to give that little whore what she deserved was stronger than you. You started ramming down harder and harder, eliciting loud moans from Kazuha, who kept holding her legs with hardly any signs of weakness.

"Oh god, oh god! Your cock feels amazing daddy! So fucking amazing!" Kazuha yelled, digging her nails into her own legs as you fucked her now with all the strength you had.

"Would you like daddy to fill you up, huh?" you teased her, seeing her faint eyes, "I bet you're wanting to feel all my thick cum paint your walls."

"Fuck yes! I need so much daddy, please, please!" she pleaded between whining of pleasure.

A small drop of sweat fell down your temple and fell on Kazuha's neck, you were fucking her impetuously, pumping up and down against her pussy, your cock going in and out completely. You wanted to keep fucking her while you saw her beautiful and sensual face, but you needed a new position that you were waiting for a while.

You quickly came out from inside her and made her legs let go, then held her by the waist and made her lie face down, with her chest and stomach flat against the mattress. You re-entered her pussy, but this time in a prone bone position that allowed you to enjoy her firm ass, which you gave a couple of strong spanks before holding her by the waist and starting your thrusts again.

Kazuha plunged her face into the mattress and clung tightly to the sheets, crumpling her fingers and pulling them almost out of the edges of the bed. You supported the entire weight of your arms against her waist and lower back through your fingers, you were holding her tightly, comparable to the force with which you were pounding her pussy over and over again.

"I'm gonna... ah! I'm gonna cum again daddy, fuck! I'm gonna cum on that delicious fucking cock!" Kazuha groaned loudly, separating her face from the mattress for a moment to see you over her shoulder.

"Then fucking cum, you fucking whore," you kept your left hand on Kazuha's waist, but the right went straight to her hair to pull it back hard, causing the girl to explode with pleasure once more.

Kazuha's body shuddered amid intense spasms, and she plunged her face back into the mattress to drown out her moans, almost screams, of pleasure. You didn't give her any rest time, in fact, what you did was make her lift her butt high enough to turn it into a makeshift doggystyle. You had to hold her tightly, otherwise, it would have been impossible for her to stay in that position by herself for the first few seconds, but wanting to show you how good girl she was, you had to make no effort but to keep fucking her with the intensity of a sex machine, since she did everything possible to support herself.

"Please cum daddy, I need it so, so bad," Kazuha's pleas already sounded muffled, as if the energy inside her had been drained from inside her with a vacuum cleaner, "give all your load to your little baby girl, just cum already daddy, please!"

You would have lasted only a little longer, but Kazuha's pretty and desperate pleas managed to break your psyche. Your two hands went to her ass to squeeze the flesh of her buttocks between your fingers, you kept fucking her with all your strength, and finally after a few seconds, you exploded inside the tight pussy of a beautiful Japanese girl.

"Oh fuck yes... yes!" she let out a deep, long moan, "Ahhh ffffffuck," Kazuha growled as she watched you bite her lip, feeling you deposit all your cum inside her, it was several thick jets, and you didn't stop until the last drop of your load had come out of your cock.

You stayed inside her pussy for a few long seconds, taking a moment to enjoy that feeling for a little longer before you stepped out and let your cum fall free from her hole to the mattress. As you let your load drip from her pussy you leaned towards her, to bring your mouth closer to her ear.

"Good girl," you whispered, "you'll be a very cute cum dump," then you kissed her on the cheek, and she turned to get you to kiss her lips too.

You lay down next to her only to wrap your arms around her body and snuggle her up against you as you shared a deep kiss. Once again, while kissing her you had lost a little track of time and space, you had almost forgotten that you were in an expensive hotel room with a girl you had just met 2 hours ago, but you didn’t feel that way, you felt that you were kissing a person you had known for years.

"Daddy..." she murmured, breaking the kiss, "you're so... cute," Kazuha looked into your eyes, and you looked back at her, meeting a pair of pretty, glowing orbs that looked at you like you were a precious treasure. You were speechless for a moment, not knowing exactly what was happening at that moment, but you had to say the first thing that came to mind.

"Uh… you too, baby, a lot," you muttered back, and before you even knew it, you had given her a stupid smile.

Kazuha smiled from ear to ear, and despite it being night, you felt like the sun had risen again in the form of a person because of how radiant and beautiful her smile was. The next thing she did was kiss you again, but this time more briefly to separate from you and sit on the bed. What the fuck had happened?

"God, we have to order the sheets to be changed," she said nonchalantly looking at the cum where it had landed.

"We'll do it when we leave, go get ready, baby," you ordered her in a low, meek voice, caressing her lower back with your fingertips.

"Yes daddy!" she answered, remembering with some happiness that you had a destination to go to. She got out of bed as quickly as possible, but when she got to her feet to try to walk to her suitcase, her legs gave out and she wobbled so badly that she had to hold on to the wall to keep from falling. You could only hold back your laughter, turning it into a nasal laugh, "Ah fuck," she cursed under her breath.

"Everything alright baby?" you teased her, with a smile.

"No, I think definitely not, Daddy fucked me so hard now my legs are weak," she giggled too, and then was finally able to walk over to her suitcase.

She took all the clothes she was going to wear from her suitcase, a small handbag that you assumed was makeup, a hair straightener and went back to the bathroom. You took advantage of the moment to also get going and get dressed again, you didn't feel very comfortable putting on the same outfit again, but unfortunately you didn't have much choice.

Kazuha spent another hour and a half in the bathroom, of which you took about 20 minutes to take a nap, but when she finally came out you were sitting on the edge of the bed watching a show on the bedroom TV, and you couldn't to do anything other than raise both eyebrows and leave your mouth agape in astonishment.

Kazuha was wearing an outfit that only highlighted how fucking sexy and beautiful she was, she was wearing a black top that exposed her midriff, clavicle and shoulders, surrounded by four black leather belts, each with different buckles; gray jeans and completely black sneakers. Her chocolate-colored hair was perfectly ironed, and her face with a not too heavy makeup that highlighted her pretty eyes and lips.

"Well? How do I look daddy?" she asked, extending both arms out to the sides of her to do a few turns on herself.

"Outrageously beautiful, baby," you walked over to her and cupped her face with both hands to give her a couple of kisses on the lips, "Hey, you've got a nice set of shoulders, plus I could wash clothes on your abs, you do sport?"

"Oh Daddy" Kazuha giggled, "No, no. I like to go to the gym in my spare time, oh, and I did ballet until I was 17."

"Well, that explains everything."

"Aham," she placed her hands on your chest, "so you could literally fuck me standing with one leg on my shoulder."

"Don't give me ideas," you warned her, but you also thought of all the possibilities, each one hotter than the last.

"You asked first," she gave you a peck on the chin, and then pulled away from her, "let's go daddy, we have a long night ahead of us."

-----------------------------

Just as you'd expect on a Saturday night, the place you and Kazuha had chosen while walking through Itaewon was full of people. The deafening sound of music was all that hit your ears as soon as you walked in, but you immediately noticed an incredible atmosphere as you made your way through the crowd and Kazuha began to move her body to the rhythm of Lady Gaga's Judas. You had paid for a pair of VIP bracelets, which allowed you access to the exclusive area and open bar for all drinks and cocktails throughout the night, but Kazuha had told you that the first thing she wanted to do when you arrived was dance.

And there you were. Kazuha had a bright smile on her face as she began to get carried away by the music. You, in order not to stand still like an idiot, also began to dance subtly, but your only purpose was to see her. She moved her body hypnotically, with hips that could kill anyone with just one movement, at a certain moment she closed her eyes to immerse herself even more in the mood, a moment that you used to stand behind her and place your hands on her waist, Kazuha opened her eyes, turned for a second to give you a smile and continued dancing, this time with her back against your chest.

There came a time for you when you didn't even pay attention to what song was playing, you were so enthralled and caught up in Kazuha's flirtatious aura that keeping up with the music and her body was your only concern. If it wasn't for her stopping in the first place, you would have stayed there with her for quite a while longer.

"Daddy, can you take me to the bar? I want a drink," she said in your ear after turning around.

"Of course, baby, come on," you took her hand and pushed your way once more through the crowd until you reached the semicircle-shaped bar, where more than one bartender was working on various drinks for people who were waiting.

"Hi!" Kazuha greeted one of the workers, "I want a martini and…" she stared at you as she waited for your response.

"A mojito is fine with me, thanks," you nodded, sitting down on one of the empty stools, where you pulled Kazuha towards you and wrapped your arms around her waist, "Well? What do you think?" you asked in her ear.

"Is incredible!" she said with special emotion while looking at the place and then up, where the exclusive box for the place was, the lights looked different there, and you noticed, obviously, less concentration of people, "I'm certainly not disappointed!"

"I'm glad to hear it, I knew I hadn't chosen a bad place," you gave her a little kiss on the neck, and then she turned her face to kiss you for a few long seconds until the drinks were served to you.

You and Kazuha picked up the glasses and sipped your respective drinks, Kazuha raised both eyebrows and smirked when she tasted it, denoting that she had loved it. You weren't very used to drinking white rum, but the taste burned your throat quite pleasantly.

"Gosh, it's delicious!" Kazuha said, looking at her cocktail, before downing the rest in one gulp and leaving you with both eyebrows raised.

"Hey hey! What the fuck?!" your eyes were wide open, you certainly didn't expect that.

"What? I can order whatever I want all night, it's not a problem," as expected, she had her face scrunched up as the alcohol ignited her body.

"And if you want to enjoy the night in a satisfying way, I recommend that you don't use a martini as a shot," you warned her, and then you took a normal sip from your mojito glass.

"I don't promise you anything, sorry Daddy!" she wailed in the most false way possible, "another one please!" she told the bartender. You sighed, concentrating on not losing your temper.

"Listen to me, you damn brat," you grabbed her arm, not too hard, just for her to pay attention to you, "you're going to do what I tell you, you're not in charge here."

"Hmm, or what?" she teased you, cocking her head.

"It's just a warning, it's your problem if you want to accept it or not," you squeezed her arm a little harder and then released it.

"Let's go upstairs daddy!" she said when she got her drink.

She strode away from you and into the crowd, taking you so by surprise that you literally ran to chase her up the stairs to the upper box. You had to grab her wrist a lot harder for her to wait for you.

When you got to the upper box, the first thing that caught your attention was the great difference in activities that were taking place there, apparently the limitations or rules were not something that existed there for some reason, there were people doing all kinds of crazy things, from the slightest thing like drinking straight from a vodka bottle until receiving lap dances that weren’t subtle at all.

"Damn, I kinda like this place even more," Kazuha said, biting her lip and then giggling.

She took your hand and walked in front of you while you looked for a completely empty sofa, curiously you found one that was perfect, in a corner, away from the spotlight. They were leather sofas in the shape of a semicircle, with a round table backlit with white lights right in the middle. Kazuha let you sit down first, that way she could get to you and sit on your right leg.

"There must be some major motherfucker up here, otherwise I don't know how that guy could be getting a lap dance from a topless girl and not being warned or something," you said glaring, then taking a sip of the mojito.

"Looks like they're having a great time," Kazuha replied, settling her ass a little closer to your lap, "seems like something I'd do," she took a long sip from her glass, leaving it half empty.

"But something you clearly won't do, right?"

"Of course not daddy! At least for now, we'll see… maybe I'll just have my pants off," she laughed, taking another sip of the martini.

"Is the alcohol making you more rebellious than usual or what? It hasn't even been 10 minutes since you started drinking and you're already acting like a brat."

"I'm not being a brat..." she sat on her side and put her two legs up on yours, "I'm actually, a brat," she brought her face closer to yours, "and not just a brat, I'm daddy's brat," she bit your lip a little harder than usual, then drank the rest of her martini right in front of your face.

"This little bitch... I can't believe it," you whispered, that had been fucking hot, but still your blood began to boil a little, both from the annoyance and from the alcohol. Kazuha began to move her upper body slightly, following the rhythm of the music as she waited for a waiter to arrive to order another drink. You kept drinking from the same glass, which was barely half full.

As time passed and the alcohol took its toll on her, Kazuha began to feel more and more liberated, she was in constant contact with you at all times, so you noticed how hot her body was due to the liqueur.

"Daddy, come dance with me," Kazuha was no longer grinning from ear to ear at all times, now she was more serious, with a lustful look on her eyes and flushed cheeks. She wasn’t drunk, she was at that precise point where you felt all your senses sharpen.

She made you wrap your arms around her waist, while she placed a hand on the back of your neck so that you would stay close to her neck at all times, that is how she began to guide you through the music with sensual and marked movements, focusing more in making you enjoy her body than the dance itself. Her ass was constantly rubbing against your crotch, and inevitably your cock began to get hard. Kazuha noticed this, and gripped your neck a bit more tightly, turning her face around and giving you a mischievous smile before sliding a hand between her back and your chest to give your bulge a firm squeeze.

"Hey!" you jumped, grabbing her wrist, "we're in a public place," you said in her ear.

"And?" she teased, then continued squeezing your cock over your pants.

"And you can't do this here, control yourself!" you stopped her a second time, to which she stopped dancing and turned to face you.

"But I'm very horny right now! I want daddy to fuck me," you noticed a certain demanding tone in her voice, which didn't help much in not losing your temper.

"I'm not going to give you what you want, and I'm not going to let you boss me around like that, you damn bitch," you warned her with a frown and a tight grip on her wrist.

"Then I guess I'll have to find another man to give me what I want, bye Daddy!" she broke free of your grasp and began to walk away from you. That was the limit for you.

"Come here you damn brat!" you snarled, catching up with her in just one stride. You were incredibly angry at the time, so much so that when you reached up and grabbed her wrist, you yanked her hard towards you like she was a rag doll. That made her moan, "You're fucking mine, do you understand? My fucking property," you said as you grabbed her chin hard, seized with a combination of jealousy and anger.

"Yes daddy, but you don't want to fuck me..." she moaned, completely surrendering to you, "and this tight pussy needs something to fill it badly."

"Let's go to the fucking bathroom. Now," you ordered, and then pulled her with you by the wrist.

You didn't even know where the hell the bathroom was, but you were letting yourself be so carried away by your impulses that after a few seconds walking you finally reached the bathroom, you didn't even notice if you had entered the men's or women's, you only knew that when you entered there was absolutely no one in there.

You roughly shoved Kazuha forward of her, causing her to fall to the bathroom floor in front of the long sink block made of black marble. You quickly closed the distance between you and her to get her back on her feet, pushing her back and turning her around so she could see herself and you in the mirror, which ran the entire length of the block horizontally.

"Stay fucking still," you growled looking at her in the mirror, her hair was a bit disheveled, but her face, especially her gaze, screamed to completely destroy her.

Your hands encircled her waist and unbuttoned her pants, lowered her zipper and without hesitating for a moment, pulled both her pants and her balenciaga panties down to her knees, from where they ended up falling to her ankles. She gasped, and pulled out of both garments to kick them to the side. You gave one of her buttocks a strong spank that resounded throughout the bathroom, Kazuha moaned, and when you made sure that your hand had been marked on her skin, you fell to your knees right in front of her ass, you spread both buttocks with your hands. hands and plunged your mouth directly into her pussy.

"Oh fuck!" Kazuha moaned loudly, as you started to eat her pussy from behind.

You didn't want to do it for a long time, but the taste of her folds, your hunger to make her yours and her sensual moans made you spend more than a minute eating her pussy like a gourmet dinner. You ran your tongue up and down her slit repeatedly, stopping from time to time to insert a bit of your tongue inside her, which drove her crazy, bending her knees and pushing even more against your face.

You kept eating her pussy for a few more seconds, but you noticed that her ass needed some attention that it hadn't been receiving until now, that's why your tongue went from lubricating her pussy to eating her ass.

"Daddy! Ah! That feels… ah fuck! Weird..." and she was right, it was strange for her at first, but as your tongue, along with your fingers, continued to play with her ass, the more she enjoyed it.

When you considered that she had had enough, you stood up again and quickly unbuttoned your pants, then lowered them with your boxers to your ankles. You felt a rush of adrenaline at that moment, anyone could walk in at that precise moment and see you with your rock hard cock behind Kazuha, but that only made everything more attractive and sexy for you.

Just to make sure you spit on your own cock and lubed it up well, before bending your knees slightly and rubbing your tip up and down over her slit, you saw her through the mirror, meeting pleading eyes and a mouth parted with gasps, and not wanting to waste much more time, you lined up with her and maked just a one hard thrust, your cock disappearing into her tight, wet pussy.

"Holy ffffuck!" Kazuha snarled, dropping her head forward and clinging tightly to the edge of the sink block. A moan escaped your mouth as well, feeling a dance of hot sensations run through your body as you once again felt the silky, tight walls of her pussy engulf your entire length.

Your hands went to her waist, your fingers firmly squeezing her meat when you began to fuck her with all the energy and desire to give her what she deserved. Kazuha immediately began to squeal with pleasure as your pelvis crashed aggressively against her ass with each of your thrusts.

"You're fucking mine, is that clear to you, you fucking brat?" you asked in a raspy voice, taking one of your hands to her hair to pull it back and make her arch her back until it almost brushed against your chest.

"Yes daddy, I'm sooo fucking yours!" she answered you between loud moans that, to your relief, absolutely no one could hear, "I'm daddy's little whore, only daddy's!"

"Then you're going to stop acting like a fucking spoiled bitch!" you grunted and then released her hair with a sharp shove, which caused her to lay her stomach flat on the shiny surface.

You took advantage of her new position to grab her left leg and bring her knee up onto the sink block, giving you a better angle to continue hammering her pussy furiously. Kazuha's moans turned into screams and deep growls that you could feel ripping in her throat, she enjoyed being used as a little sex toy with which to vent your anger, and most of all feeling your cock slamming deep inside her.

You gave her ass a couple more spanks, each one hard enough to leave a mark that wouldn't go away for hours. Both of her buttocks were already red, but that wasn't enough to let her know who was in charge.

You left her pussy, and in one quick movement you turned her around again to grab her by the waist, lift her to the sink block and spread her legs wide to get back inside her. Your gaze met hers, and despite the fact that you wanted to kiss those pretty parted lips, you knew that the right thing to do was not to give in to her charms.

A break was the last thing you wanted to give her, but you were also sure she didn't want something like that. You continued fucking her as if your life depended on it, your bodies became sweaty, and in the middle of your thrusts some drops fell on her perfect and toned abdomen. Kazuha kept moaning like crazy, but you decided to shut her up in a very simple way; both of your hands went straight to her neck, you wrapped your fingers around it and squeezed hard, cutting off any sound coming from her throat, and her breath.

And as if that were some kind of special switch, as soon as your fingers pressed against her throat, Kazuha growled from deep inside her in an intense explosion of pleasure that made her tremble; the tight walls of her pussy nearly crushed your cock due to the strong orgasm she was having, but you didn't give a shit, you just kept fucking her hard through her ecstasy.

"That's right, cum for Daddy and Daddy only, fucking slut," on an impulse you slapped her hard with your right hand, and you would have regretted it right away, but that only made Kazuha squeal and growl even louder, then you noticed that she wanted to say something, so you eased your grip on her neck.

"Please cum inside your little princess daddy," she begged, looking into your eyes, with hair in her face and a few strands sticking to her forehead due to sweat, "Use my pussy however you please! I'm just daddy's cum dump!"

After saying that Kazuha wrapped her legs around your torso, trapping you tightly and pulling you closer to her, that made it much more difficult for you to hold on much longer. You didn't continue to choke her, instead you reached up to the nape of her neck and pulled her hair again, exposing her long, sweaty neck for you to kiss and lick as you gave the last few thrusts before exploding inside her pussy.

Normally you would never have moaned as loudly as you did at that moment, but all the sensations combined were extremely overstimulating for you. You bit into her neck, and then her shoulder, while shooting multiple thick strips of cum onto the walls of her pussy. Kazuha accompanied you with more high moans, which harmonized with yours and made you completely surrender to her. Her thighs tightened on each side of your torso, not letting you go under any circumstances until you left absolutely all your seed inside her.

It took a few slow pumps until your own orgasm passed, you squeezed your eyes shut, and let your head fall forward to rest your forehead on her shoulder. Both of you were breathing hard, as if you had run a marathon, her hair, which had been perfectly ironed before, was now ruined, and even her top was somewhat out of place, crooked on the right side. You stayed inside her for a few long seconds while you both rested, and when you regained your composure, you straightened up and slowly pulled your cock out from between her folds, letting a thick river of hot load spill out from inside her.

"You came a lot this time Daddy..." Kazuha sighed, biting her lip and then using two of her fingers to scoop up some of your cum from her pussy to take directly into her mouth to swallow, "was I a good girl?"

"No, you were anything but that, but you're lucky you drive me crazy," you grabbed her chin, and placed a small kiss on her lips.

"Oh yeah?" she raised an amused eyebrow, knowing that now she could do literally anything without you punishing her for it.

"I don't even know why I open my mouth," you sighed, shaking your head. It was at that moment that you remembered where you were, "Oh shit! We're fucking lucky, get dressed quickly!"

You helped her down from the sink block and then handed over her clothes. You both dressed and got ready as fast as you could, fearing for the first time that someone would walk in and see you both there together. Kazuha took some extra time to make her hair look halfway decent, and she certainly did, but she still looked like she'd been rolled down a hill.

"Fuck, we didn't clean that up," you said, looking at the pool of cum in the sink that dripped onto the floor.

"Never mind! Someone else will clean it up, let's just get out of here," once again, and as if nothing had happened, Kazuha was the one who took your hand and pulled you out of the bathroom.

To your surprise, everything was still exactly the same up there, no one had noticed your presence, and apparently they had not realized that you had been there for a long time, but before you continued walking you stopped when you remembered something. Heejin.

"Baby, go sit down, I need to send a message," you gave Kazuha a small kiss on the temple, and then another on her lips, "I won't be long."

"Yes daddy! I'll be waiting for you," she complied, walking away from you with little totters.

You took out your phone, entering Heejin's chat.

When you finished sending the messages you put your phone back in your pocket, and walked to meet Kazuha again. You didn't want to think about it too much, but you had the feeling that everything was going in a direction that you hadn't thought of from the beginning. You had definitely felt a connection with Kazuha, and you had all kinds of worries about it, but for your own sake and hers you decided to suppress those thoughts, and just dedicated yourself to enjoying the rest of the night with her.

——————————————————————————

Spren Notes:

I have nothing to say, honestly just excuse me for making y'all wait so long for this shit lol. Notably, I didn't realize I'd written 3 different smut scenes until I did, wow, I really got carried away by this girl. Anyway, thank you all so much for reading!

If you, dear reader, are also interested in buying me a commission, do not hesitate to go through my inbox, I’ll be delighted!

[devastatinglygreen]

A hot take but one that's a hill you're willing to die on?

oh my.

alright.

i think the comparisons to anthony or benedict when it comes to colin and sex are bad faith takes and the people who think he slept his way through 17 cities are giving him far too much credit (and hate? like no one reacts to colin the way they do to anthony or benedict and it's wild).

whenever colin mentions/we see him involved in sexual situations in part one, he's at odds with penelope emotionally. over the summer he's waiting for penelope to write him and when she doesn't he starts looking for that connection in the physical and when he's back home, he's still seeking what he considers his "normal" with penelope when he's at the brothel in ep 2. right after he leaves the girlies, he's acting both nervous and like he's overcompensating so you can tell he's still unsure about where they stand. he wants penelope's approval so bad he's choking on it.

in ep 4 he's both in love with her and at odds emotionally—they're not on the same page and he's not sure they ever will be. once he's aware of his emotions, he's not even capable of pretending any longer.

which moves into the end of 4 and into ep 5 where he's both confident but nervous because he's done this before but he's never done it quite like that. he's already insecure about her feelings so it feels like all of his focus is making sure she enjoys herself because he can provide this for her. he can give her pleasure and he can give her a home. he can publish his journals and make her proud of him. but it's all to prove something to himself (and her) when it comes to their relationship.

he's far more himself with her than he is with anyone else which is why i think he's so insecure about it. and why LW is such a big issue for him. he's scared for her and he's jealous, yes, but i also think there's a tinge of "i'm still not enough for her" mixed in there when she won't give it up, like being married to him isn't enough even tho that's not what LW is about for her.

neither one of them are being themselves completely at that point. he's more himself, yeah, but he's also trying to prove that he's some better version of himself he thinks he needs to be for her and she's not owning the secret parts of herself yet. they're still not on the same page emotionally.

we saw how hard it was for him to separate his mind and body from the start so i think him trying to do that with penelope, the woman he's in love with and married to by that point, was going to be near impossible. he visibly weakens every time she says she loves him so idk what else people want from him tbh or why they act like he was punishing her. i think he was respecting the both of them.

long way to say what i said but i also stand by it.

[babymetaldoll]

Are you mine? - Chapter two: “Let the fear you have fall away”

Summary: (Y/N) is very pregnant and she will have to learn to deal with the hormonal swings, the fears, the nausea and the realization that things might never be the same again.   Word count: 11.110 words Warnings: mention of a daddy kind, description of Criminal Cases from season 9 ep 19 Mr & Mrs. Anderson. Extreme fluff, some light angst.  A/N: years ago I wrote the entire story of how Spencer found out he was gonna be a dad with reader, it's called: "You are gonna be the best dad." 

Series' Masterlist - Author's masterlist

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Spencer’s point of view

When (Y/N) told me she was pregnant with our first baby, it was one of the most chaotic moments of my life. I had no idea what was going on.

We didn’t try for too long before she realized her period was late, just four months of many, many attempts to have a baby. I was blind to the first signs: her breasts were getting bigger and her stomach was giving her a hard time. I never noticed anything, which eventually made me feel like a lousy profiler if you ask me. But I wasn't trying to read her, and she was waiting for the right time to tell me. She had it all planned: she had even rented a cabin in the woods for the following weekend, and she had a little box of clues gathered to surprise me.

But, of course, our job got in the way, like it always did when something important was about to happen. We were caught up in a case and never made it in time to enjoy the cabin. Besides, the team realized something was up with my wife, even before I suspected anything. By the time we were back in DC after solving that case, they had all noticed she was pregnant, and even Emily in London knew I was gonna be a dad before I did.

I remember getting our bags in the car, still in the FBI parking, when somehow I found the box filled with all the clues and little treats she had gotten for me.

- “Hey, chipmunk? What’s in this box?”

- “What?”- (Y/N) turned around and tried to grab it from my hands, but it was too late. My curiosity was faster and I had already opened it.

- “What’s all this? a teddy bear with glasses? That’s funny. A rattle, baby shoes…”- I started taking everything from the box, still not getting what it was all about. (Y/N) sighed and looked at me, trying to find the right words to give me the news.

- “Honey…”

- “A onesie that says “baby genius, like my dad,”- I remember thinking We should get one of these when we have a baby. I was embarrassingly stupid at that minute, and I blame the exhaustion after the case. Besides, I know I can be clueless about the obvious sometimes.

- “Honey bunny…”- my wife stood in front of me and looked at my confused face as I kept trying to understand what those things were doing there.

- “Why do you have all these things in our car?”

- “There is one more thing in the box you haven’t seen yet.”- (Y/N) whispered with a sweet smile on her lips. I dug into the box again until I finally grabbed a pregnancy test with a little note hanging from it.

- “Baby Reid, coming soon.”- I read out loud and immediately opened my eyes wide, in shock.

- “I’m so sorry, Spencer. I didn’t want to tell you here. I wanted to make it special”- (Y/N) whispered and even pouted as I looked at her in complete disbelief. Yes, we stood in the parking lot at Quantico, but she was delivering the most important news I had ever received.

- “You… we are… you are….”- I stuttered as I tried to make my brain work again. I felt all my brain cells had turned off the second I connected all the dots.

- “Yes.”- she smiled and took a step closer to me as she added- “We are gonna have a baby.”

I could only stare at her, in shock. Her eyes were filled with tears as she waited for my reaction. Meanwhile, I could barely process all that information. My heart was pounding in my chest and my eyes were watering as I just looked at my wife.

- “Come here,”- when I finally managed to speak, I hugged her tight and tried not to sob as I kissed her, and repeatedly thanked her.

- “Why are you thanking me?”- (Y/N) whispered against my chest and I just chuckled, still shocked. It took me a few seconds to gather my thoughts because I felt like I was dreaming. Somehow at that minute, life was too perfect to be true.

- “Because you just gave me everything I ever wanted,”- I murmured and wiped off the tears from my face quickly before cupping her cheeks with my hands and kissing her lips sweetly.

- “I just wanna make you happy, Spencer Walter Reid,”- she answered between kisses, making me smile.

- “You are very good at that”- I said as I wrapped her in my arms and kissed her one more time.

- “You make me happy too just so you know,”- (Y/N) added and smiled as I rested my forehead against hers. My wife was pregnant, it was a dream come true.

- “And you are gonna be a great dad, honey bunny.”- (Y/N) said and it still shocked me to hear those words.

- “I’m gonna be a dad,”- I repeated and chuckled- “I’m gonna be a dad.”

- “Not just a dad, the best dad!”- (Y/N) kissed me again and held my hand- “Now let’s go home so we can eat and celebrate.”

- “Wait!”- before (Y/N) could move from my embrace I stopped her, all the signs that were too obvious to see were finally making sense.

- “Emily knew, that’s why he texted me congratulations. Am I right?!”- my wife looked at me with an apologetic smile and nodded.

- “I’m so sorry, honey. I tried to make it special, but I failed.”

- “But she is in London! How did she… Who told her? Who else knows?”

- “Morgan, JJ, Hotch, and Garcia. Garcia told Emily.”

- “You told the entire team before you told me?”- the words came out harder and angrier than they should have been. In reality, I was shocked she hadn’t told me first, but never mad.

- “I haven’t told anyone except for you. But working with profilers makes keeping a secret a nearly impossible task.”

- “But I didn’t notice”- I argued, upset with myself for being so blind and naive. My wife hugged me, and kissed me a few times, soothing my anger.

- “I didn’t want you to notice ‘cos I wanted to make it special for you. Not in a parking lot, by the way”- she was disappointed with the circumstances of her confession.

- “Any place is special when I’m with you, Mrs. Reid”- I whispered, holding her closer and kissing her lips a few more times, as I felt her smiling against my mouth. - “Now let’s go home, tomorrow we are going to the library to get all the pregnancy books we can find.”

- “Of course, we are.”- (Y/N) giggled and got in the car. It wasn’t in a magical cabin in the woods or watching the sunset on a beach, but it was perfect anyway because we were together, and my wife was giving me the life I always dreamed about, but never imagined I could have.

When we told the team, everybody got excited. They hugged us and congratulated us for a good ten minutes. Though they all knew, the fact it was official made it all special. Garcia went nuts and even video-called Prentiss to the UK. JJ was pregnant with Michael at the time, and she started sharing tips with my wife right away.

- “Congratulations, Reid”- Blake said as she stood by my side and raised her coffee, to toast. I followed her lead and smiled.

- “Thank you.”

- “Have you thought about names yet?”

- “Yes, but nothing specific yet. We are just sharing options and making a list.”

- “Which is your favorite?”

- “Matilda or Raven for a girl, and Finn or Oliver for a boy.”- I said, smiling and Blake nodded right away.

- “Did you pick names from your favorite books?”

- “Yes. They were my best friends growing up.”- I confessed and sipped my coffee. (Y/N) turned to me from the other side of the room and smiled, making my heart skip a beat.

But then, it all turned too real to be true. Hotch told (Y/N) she wasn’t allowed back into the field until after the baby was born, which also included me most of the time. And I was glad to stay aside from the action. I wanted to take care of my wife and help her with every craving, every back pain, or body ache. Then came all the paperwork, signing disclaimers and basically making sure the entire Bureau knew what was going on. Hotch said it was mandatory, but it still felt slightly over the top. Neither of us argued with it, but we were both slightly uncomfortable.

On top of telling the team and the rest of the FBI about our pregnancy, Mikey, Frank and Lu were paranoid during the entire gestation of our baby. They called pretty much every day and became very protective of (Y/N). Honestly, they were worse than her parents.

- “How long are you going to work?”- Frank asked her when we all got together at our apartment for dinner. (Y/N) looked at Paco and raised an eyebrow, not getting where that question was coming from, or why he was even asking.

- “Until the day the baby is born, why?”- my wife's answer was the most logical, and also, what we had talked about and agreed to do. Yet somehow, for Frank, Lu, and Mikey, it was the most irrational thing we had ever shared with them.

- “What the fuck, nugget?”- Mikey yelled, making (Y/N) jump.

- “What’s wrong?”- she asked, confused by their freaked-out reaction.

- “You have to take time off work, get some rest, and keep our baby away from fucking psycho killers!!”- somehow, Frank calling my baby “our baby” wasn’t weird at all. He, Mikey, and Lu were insanely intrusive during the whole process. Not in a bad way, just in a… I guess, possessive way.

- “You know I’m no longer on the field.”- (Y/N) explained again, though that was something we had both told our friends multiple times. - “I’ve been sitting around police stations all over the country for the last four months! It’s so fucking boring!”

I knew (Y/N) didn’t like to stay away from the action. She loved our job and she wanted to catch serial killers. But at that moment, she could only help with geographic profile and support from the station.

- “Just what? four more to go!”- Mikey joked and sipped his beer- “Come on, nugget. We are worried because we love you.”

- “Yeah, we are all worried about my godson or daughter.”- Frank added and both Mikey and Lu smacked him at the same time.

- “My godson or daughter!”- they argued possessively. I turned to my wife and watched her smile as our friends continued rambling about who the godfather of our firstborn would be. I held her hand upon the table and she turned to me immediately.

- “I love you.”- I whispered and she smiled.

- “Me more.”- (Y/N) leaned over and kissed me, as our friends kept chatting.- “So, do you want to go out for dinner tomorrow?”

- “Are you asking me out, Mrs. Reid?”- I whispered and watched her blushing, completely flustered. I will always love that reaction to that simple nickname.

- “Maybe I am, doctor.”- and she knew exactly how to tease me.

- “This is gross, we are still here.”- Frank argued right away.

- “Remember when you asked me a million times to date Spencer? Well now I married him and you’ll have to deal with this!”- (Y/N) quickly replied and smiled at her friends. I chuckled and stared at her with what Garcia calls “heart eyes”, just like the cartoons. Every day I feel like there is no way on earth I could ever love her more than I already do, but the following day, I always prove myself wrong.

(Y/N)’s point of view

A moment of pure honesty: so far in life, I’ve enjoyed being pregnant. Each time it has happened, Spencer treats me like a princess made of glass. He is always sweet and thoughtful, but when I��m carrying his kids, I become the most important and precious thing in the whole galaxy for him. It’s impossible not to fall for how carefully and lovingly he treats me.

Any cravings, no matter what time or what it is, he gets it. Pampers and kisses are available for me 24/7. Crying over a movie, show, or TV commercial? Spencer is there to hug me and tell me I’m not crazy. And trust me, I feel like I’m going crazy most of the time.

However, there is a dark side to pregnancy, and so many ghosts appear to hunt me. There are the doubts that keep hunting my brain, hormones changing, and overthinking. Sometimes I felt needy, and when the months passed and I started turning “rounder”, I also started feeling ugly. I have never been overconfident about my looks, but now I was afraid Spencer was never going to think I was sexy again, and he would leave me.

Being pregnant can make you very irrational. No one ever told me that. And if they did, I never actually listened.

However, my husband was always the sweetest. He would hold me, kiss me, and tell me how much he loved me.

That very first time I got pregnant, I started second-guessing everything a few days before Valentine’s Day. I was already five months pregnant and I felt like a whale. I couldn’t imagine how big I was going to get in the following weeks. And I was sure Spencer was going to leave me.

I told you, I was being irrational, right?

Morgan and Garcia were talking about Valentine’s Day when we reached the bullpen that morning. They were telling each other whatever plans they had with their dates and both of them seemed excited. Derek has a date with Savannah and Pen was planning a night with her boyfriend, Sam.

- “And what are you guys doing this year?”- Garcia asked and placed a hand on my tummy, hoping to feel the baby’s first kicks.

- “I… I don’t know.”- I answered the truth, ‘cos I hadn’t had a moment to plan anything for Valentine’s. Over the years, it had become one of our favorite celebrations, and every year I dedicated the entire day to celebrating my husband. I always tried to make something extra special for him that day. Why? Aside from the fact that he absolutely deserved it, I always felt like he would do everything and anything to make me feel loved, and I wanted to make him feel just as loved.

So, having no plans for Valentine’s that year shocked me and stressed me. I had forgotten about that celebration. And I needed to show my husband how much I loved him and make it extra special.

There I was, lost in thoughts and planning when JJ walked out of the elevator. She had been kidnapped a few weeks earlier, we had all worked extra hard to bring her back, unharmed, and medics had suggested she stay home for a month to recover. Which is why none of us was expecting to have her back to work yet.

- “JJ! You are back! How are you feeling?”- Spencer asked as he hugged her.

- “I’m ready to work”- she replied and turned to me- “(Y/N)! You are glowing!”

- “Don’t turn this to me, what the hell are you doing here already? Shouldn’t you be resting?”- I argued as JJ simply smiled, looking freaking gorgeous.

- “I'm… I'm fine. Don't get me wrong, I love my boys to death, but I was starting to get a little stir-crazy.”

- “Well, let's do this.”- Morgan said and opened the door for us.

- “I’m glad you are back, JJ”- Spencer added and smiled at our friend. She smiled back at him and replied.

- “Thank you. I’m glad to be here.”

- “Do you want some tea?”- Penelope suggested and all of them walked a little faster than me, as I slowly made my way to the briefing room. I had a little back pain and some dizziness that made moving a little more challenging. And for the first time, Spencer didn’t notice. Instead, he walked JJ to the briefing room and left me behind.

I stared at him from a distance and sighed. I knew I was being irrational, but I couldn’t help but feel a little jealous of the attention Spencer was giving JJ at that minute. I know it was stupid, she was our friend and she had been held captive and tortured, of course, he was going to be extra nice to her. But still, it hurt.

The entire team welcomed JJ back, and before Garcia started explaining our next case, everybody asked JJ how she was feeling. They wanted to know if she had seen a doctor before coming back to work, and basically, they all just told her how amazing she looked. I was the one turning food into a tiny human in my stomach, but she looked good.

It didn’t get much better once we were on the plane to Pittsburgh. I could feel my feet getting swollen with every minute that passed. That had never happened before and it just made me feel humiliated. Everything was going downhill.

- “Good news, crime-fighters.”- Garcia’s voice took me from my thoughts and back to reality as her image showed up on the screen in front of me. - “I tracked the shower curtains this creep has been using to burrito his victims. Turns out they are commercial grade, sold in bulk to a bunch of economy motels, a list of which I just sent you.”

- “It makes sense.”- Blake added- “It's a secure secondary location.”

- “Either he doesn't want to draw attention to his home or someone is living with him.”- Papa Pasta suggested.

- “Rossi, you and Morgan go to the M. E.”- Aaron commanded- “ JJ and Reid, go through Garcia's list of motels.”- I froze at those words. Spencer was going to be on the field? He had been with me at the police station for the last eleven cases. I knew it wasn’t a rule or mandatory, but I thought Hotch was trying to be nice and pair us together for our sanity. Wanna know what upset me the most? my husband didn't argue, he just smiled and nodded at the command.

- “Blake, (Y/N), and I will go to the field office and cover victimology with Agent West.”- Aaron finished commanding and I stayed still, sipping my water, nearly shocked. Blake cut me a big smile and I had to smile back.

- “How are you feeling, (Y/N)?”- Blake asked as soon as we got into the SUV after we landed. I had already kissed my husband goodbye and watched him make his way with JJ, away from me, which for some weird reason, hurt me deeper than I ever thought it would.

- “I’m good, I miss coffee, though. I would love a large black coffee right now. No sugar, no cream.”- I replied and struggled to buckle up. - “Shit, I’m so pregnant.”- Hotch chuckled and helped me with the seat belt.

- “You are only five months into the pregnancy.”- he whispered and smiled at me- “You are still a few weeks from the short breath problems, cramps, and fatigue.”

- “Please, don’t spoil it!”- I argued and Aaron Hotchner laughed- “You are giving me all the dirty details of pregnancy I didn’t want to know.”

- “You will love it! He is just making it sound like hell!”- Blake rubbed my shoulder with her hand in support and I tried to turn and look at her. I knew she had lost her child, but she had been a mom, and her guidance had been quite useful during the entire process.

- “Other than coffee, how are your cravings?”- Hotch asked as he started driving us to the station. I told them about my random food choices, and they made me feel better about my pickle mayonnaise craving for dinner. According to him, Haley craved hot Cheetos dipped in yogurt, and Blake told me she once ate two bowls of hot Indian curry because she was craving spicy food. Somehow, curry started to sound good after she mentioned it, but we had no time for pit stops. In a few minutes, we were at the station, and before I realized it, my head was buried in work. Another day, another psycho killer, I guess.

I didn’t hear from Spencer for the rest of the day. Nothing. He didn’t reply to my texts (I only sent two because I didn’t want to sound needy) and he didn’t even call. So when he reached the station that evening with JJ, I was already upset and ready to give him the cold shoulder.

- “Chipmunk! how are you feeling?”- my husband kissed my cheek and sat next to me at the table, where I was analyzing victimology with Blake.

- “I’m good.”- I simply replied and kept looking at the papers.

- “Have you eaten anything?”- he asked and grabbed a few files as well. I just hummed and avoided looking at him. There was a long silence in the room, though we were all there. For a few seconds, that felt like hours, no one said anything. Probably they all noticed I was mad at my husband.

- “Take a look at this”- Agent West, from the local police force, walked into the room with more info and handed us all new folders- “You guys were right. I was able to match their M.O. to 10 other strangulation murders. We were only able to identify four.”

- “They've been at it since 1994.”- Rossi pointed out as we all read the file.

- “Looks like they stopped in 2010 and remained dormant up until now.”- my husband added and looked at me. But before I could say anything, JJ started talking.

- “Something had to prevent them from killing. Maybe one was incarcerated.”- so I just sighed and looked at the files again.

- “I'll start pulling prison records, see if I can't get a match.”- Agent West was very excited with the findings, and he walked out of the room in a hurry. I sighed one more time, exhausted, and continued reading. Spencer moved closer to me and rubbed his warm hand carefully on my leg. It was a loving gesture I’ve always adored, but I was so irrationally upset with him at that minute, I hated it. I held my breath and stayed very still as he did, and I guess he noticed something was wrong, ‘cos he slowly stopped and moved his hand from my leg. I didn’t turn to look at him, but I knew his eyes were analyzing me and probably wondering why I was mad.

- “These two have been in a relationship a lot longer than we thought.”- Rossi said and left his case file on the table, ready to start analyzing the new facts.

- “But even if they broke up, to come back together and resume killing after a four-year hiatus is rare.”- Spencer looked confused by the unsub's actions like there was a logic he couldn’t understand. I shrugged, finally acknowledging him.

- “Love is strange. It will make you do the craziest things.”

Those words just slipped through my lips and never actually went through my brain. It was an entirely emotional answer. My husband stared at me, his lips parted and his eyes focused on every micro reaction on my face. I tried not to give away anything, but I’m sure I failed.

- “Guys, what if they are married?”- JJ suggested, obviously taking the idea from what was happening in the room. I looked down at my hands and decided I didn’t want to talk anymore. I just wanted to crawl into a bed and lie down.

- “Sounds about right”- Rossi added and looked at us.

- “It’s been a long day, we’ll pick it up from here tomorrow at seven. Let’s get some rest.”- Hotch read my mind and we all slowly gathered our things. Spencer grabbed my bag and waited as I slowly moved to the door. I walked in silence until we reached an SUV, and my husband opened the door for me. I wanted to tell him thanks, but I didn’t. Why? ‘Cos I was being irrational.

- “Do you wanna get dinner?”- he whispered as he sat behind the wheel. I didn’t reply.- “(Y/N), why are you mad at me? What did I do?”

- “Nothing.”- I mumbled, already pouting.

- “Clearly I did something that upset you, so please tell me.” - he wasn’t angry, he was honestly worried. I did my best and tried not to look at him, instead, I was making an effort not to cry.

- “Is it because I didn’t reply to your texts? I am sorry chipmunk, but JJ and I had a very busy day, and I didn’t have a spare second.”

- “Sure…”- I whispered and bit my lips, ‘cos my quin quivered. I turned and looked through the window, to anything but my husband.

- “Come on, please.”

- “You didn’t have ten seconds to type “I’m ok, love you” during the entire day you spent with JJ?! Really?!”

And what I avoided the most, just happened: I yelled like a crazy person. I even broke into tears as well. It was way out of proportion, it was completely unexpected, and Spencer looked at me not knowing what was happening.

- “I wanted to be with you! I wanted to know about you! I fucking missed you! I was worried! And you never took the time to reply to my texts! I am sure you were waiting for any chance you got to stay away from me! I’m sure you were already sick of being paired with me at the station! and you were happy to be with JJ ‘cos she is cute and hot and I am a fucking pregnant whale!!”

Yes. I am not proud. But somehow, it was relieving just taking all that from my chest.

Spencer stayed quiet for a moment as I just cried my eyes out. I prayed none of our friends was left in that parking lot, ‘cos I didn’t want them to see me like that. Spencer reached for my hand and held it. I didn’t fight him or anything, mostly because I was honestly craving his touch. He caressed my hand and I continued sobbing and after a few minutes, he simply whispered.

- “I’m sorry.”- and I knew I wasn’t mad at him anymore- “I know this whole process is… difficult for you, and I am sorry I can’t do anything but be supportive with you to help you through it. I love you, chipmunk. I love you so much it hurts. I never meant to make you sad, or upset. I just… got my head into work and forgot. It won’t happen again.”

Spencer kissed my knuckles and I tried to steady my breathing. My irrationality was upsetting, but I didn’t know how to turn it off or manage it.

- “I love you.”- he whispered one more time- “And please, don’t call yourself a whale again.”- my husband begged as he kept looking into my eyes with such love and care, I felt I was gonna melt- “You are more beautiful with every passing day.”

- “I’m getting huge, and I’m just nineteen weeks in.”- I mumbled still in tears, and caressed my tummy.

- “Chipmunk, you look so sexy, so beautiful and so mine with that round tummy, showing everyone you are carrying my baby.”- I wanted to tease him about his obvious breeding kink, but I was still trying to calm myself down.

- “I am so sorry I made you feel bad, ma cheriê. I love you so much.”

- “I… I love you too.”- I managed to mumble, still sobbing- “And… and I’m so fucking hungry.”- my husband started the car right away and started driving in no time.

- “Then I’m taking you out for dinner to make it up to you for making you worried today. Is that ok with you, chipmunk?”- I nodded and whipped off my tears with both hands, ruining what was left of my makeup.

I wish I could tell you that was the only time I was irrational during my pregnancy. But it was just the beginning. And every time I realized I was acting crazy, I got more and more scared Spencer would stop loving me.

Spencer’s point of view

I’ve always thought it’s unfair how my wife has to carry (literally and emotionally) the burden of bringing our kids into the world. It was painful to see her go through so much on her own, being an observer and a helper in any way possible. I couldn’t take the morning sickness from her, or the swollen feet, the contraction pain, the labor sacrifice. It was so much. And all I could was support her.

She could be irrational. I know it's common to have mood swings and feel tearful or easily irritated during the first semester of pregnancy. I was ready for it. I knew her body was going through a change and she had to adapt to the higher levels of these hormones. After that, things had to go smoother.

Statistically, one in eight women suffers from depression during gestation, and I was scared anything like that would happen to her. She was already giving me everything I ever dreamed about, and I wanted to make her happy.

After that first incident, I wanted to talk to Hotch and tell him I’d stay at the police station with my wife, but (Y/N) convinced me otherwise.

- “I overreacted, honey bunny.”- she stood in front of me and helped me fix my tie before we left our room to work the following morning- “Stop worrying about it. Don’t say anything to Hotch, just let’s go out there and do as we are told, for once.”

I stared at her and caressed her belly, waiting to finally feel our baby’s first kicks. I looked carefully into my wife’s eyes and leaned over to kiss her.

- “Are you sure?”

- “Positive”- she stood on her tiptoes and reached my lips with hers, kissing so sweetly and softly, that I nearly melted. - “Go out there and kick some ass.”

- “And when we get home, do I get to worship my wife?” - I whispered in her ear as (Y/N) giggled. I kept my arms around her, feeling her body close to me.- “I mean it, I want you to know how much I love you, ma cherie.”

- “I know, Daddy.”- the pet name had a different meaning now, and it affected me on so many levels it’s embarrassing to even start explaining.

- “Are you gonna be good today?”- I asked her in a deep voice. She just nodded and kissed me again. - “If you are good today at work, I’ll do whatever you want me to do when we get back home.”- I suggested and (Y/N) bit her lips.

- “Anything?”

- “Whatever you want, ma cherie”

- “Laundry and ironing too?”- she murmured and walked away from me. I groaned and followed her, leaving our room.

- “Really?”

- “You said anything, dear husband. That means in fact, whatever I want.”

- “But why can’t it be dirty?”- (Y/N) chuckled as she pushed the elevator button and turned to me.

- “It could be… if you get laundry done.”

That day I was out in the field with JJ and Morgan. Yes, it was a change being out there again after so many months at police stations doing geographic profiles with my wife. And though a part of me enjoyed being out, I still wished I was with her.

Morgan always made fun of me, saying I was whipped. And yes, I was. I still am. And I love every second of it. I don’t know how to explain it, but being with my wife makes me the happiest man on earth. No matter what. I guess Morgan hadn’t met that kind of person yet, so he couldn’t get it at that minute.

However, being on the field with him also meant having to hear him teasing me and asking way too many questions. And considering (Y/N) had had a little moment the prior day at the police station, he had a lot of things to ask.

- “How is the Mrs, Reid?”- Morgan drove to the crime scene we were called to and kept his eyes on the road. JJ was sitting next to him and didn’t say a word.

- “You just saw her, she is fine.”- I tried to be as vague as possible, but he kept pushing it, of course.

- “Everything ok? She seemed a little upset yesterday.”

- “Morgan, don’t snoop into other people’s relationships.”- JJ was the voice of reason Derek obviously ignored.

- “Pregnancy is getting harder?”- he asked and I sighed, annoyed by his questions- “Oh, man! That’s a yes!”

- “It’s just unfair she gets to go through all those changes and all I can do is support her. I feel useless because I can’t help her.”- I explained, but now that I think about it, Morgan was never going to understand what was happening. He just wanted to tease me.

- “So hormones are driving her crazy?”- and he even chuckled as she suggested my wife was going insane.

- “No. She is…”- I bit my tongue ‘cos I didn’t want to share something that I knew was going to upset my wife.

- “I’ve seen it happen.”- Morgan smiled and JJ turned to him immediately.

- “When?”

- “Ehh…”- he hesitated and nearly answered, but decided to change the subject instead. - “Is she upset you are on the field today?”

- “No, she just worries, but it’s normal. We talked about it and everything is ok.”- the less they knew, the better. I know we are together all the time, but I don’t want the team into everything that happens in my relationship.

- “Well, you know what they say.”- Derek said as he parked the SUV- “Happy wife, happy life.”

I quickly got out of the van and stared at the scene in front of me. A new victim was displayed in the middle of the street, and for the first time ever, it was a man and not a woman.

- “This is a first for them.”- JJ said as she stood next to me, followed by Morgan.

- “Aside from gender, the M. O. is the same.”- Agent West pointed from the side of the corps.

- “Something in their dynamic must have changed.”- Morgan walked closer as I maintained my distance from the body.

- “A male victim most likely caters to the female unsub's desires.”- JJ added and turned to me for a second.

- “They haven't displayed that behavior before. Up until now, it appears it's been the male picking the victims.”- I said, trying to connect the dots.

- “Which typically indicates a dominant/submissive relationship.”- Morgan pointed out, still staring at the corpse in front of us.

- “It looks as though her psychopathology could be evolving.”- I know it was obvious, but I had to say it.

- “Ok, we need to look at this from a marriage perspective. Compromise is the key to any long-term relationship's success. What if this murder was their way of sharing responsibility?”- I don’t know if JJ was saying that because it fit the case or the conversation we were having in the SUV earlier.

- “He let the woman choose the victim. That could be problematic.”- I replied only because it made sense to the case, not because it made sense in a relationship.

- “Now that she's been given control, she might not want to let it go.” - Morgan added and looked at me- “Sounds familiar, kid?”

- “Shut up.”

The teasing didn’t get any better when we delivered the profile. Now that I know there won’t be any more moments like that again in my life (at least at work), I guess it can be a little nostalgic. But I specifically remember how annoyed I was that day.

After the crime scene, we went straight back to the police station. We had a brief meeting with the team and then, we decided to deliver the profile.

- “We believe we're looking for a married couple, to whom we can attribute at least 13 deaths since 1994.”- Hotch started explaining.

- “He's a sexual sadist, and she's a scopophiliac, which is Greek for "love of looking, " meaning that she gets off on watching her husband kill.”- my wife added as she crossed her arms on her chest and stared at the police force, taking notes around us.

- “Like Karla Homolka and Paul Bernardo, who raped, tortured, and killed at least 19 people, this couple's homicidal tendencies most likely surfaced once they met.”- I walked from the side I was standing and moved closer to my wife, ‘cos I didn’t feel comfortable when she was far from me. I needed to feel I could protect her and our baby by all means.

- “It's possible that the use of a shower curtain is a sign of remorse on the part of the female unsub.”- Rossi started talking as I stood right next to (Y/N). I could actually feel the warmth from her body next to me, though we weren’t even touching.

- “Up until now, all the victims were females, so it's possible that the change in victimology could be the husband's way of subjugating his own needs for his wife's happiness.”- Derek explained, but looked at me for a slip of a second.

- “But a sexual sadist doesn't typically subjugate. We think he could have committed crimes on the side that got him arrested.”- JJ continued.

- “But wouldn't we have the bodies to prove that?”- Agent West asked, confused.

- “Yes. Which is why we need to take another look at all strangulations within the geographical profile that occurred during the gap years.”- Rossi explained. I slowly rested my hand next to my wife’s and moved my pinky carefully toward her fingers, caressing her skin slowly. (Y/N) didn’t move, didn’t look at me, she didn’t even notice what I was doing. But I felt her shoulder dropping and relaxing as soon as I touched her.

- “Without his female partner's influence, the male's independent M.O. should present differently.”- Morgan said and locked eyes with me, making me stop what I was doing right away.

- “Learning the nature of how that differs from their team dynamic will be the key to driving a wedge between their partnership.” - my wife said, making eye contact with as many officials as possible. I just stared at her and nodded, supporting every word.

- “In the meantime, all transients are at risk.”- Blake continued talking - “Now that the wife has gotten a taste of control, she'll crave that feeling again.”

- “And if the husband sublimated his needs with the last kill, his desire to fulfill his own will be what’s driving him now. Thank you very much”- Hotch finished and dispatched all the police. We all remained in our spots to continue with the profile review.

- “What can you add, Reid?”- Morgan asked and raised an eyebrow- “From your husband's point of view, not talking as an SSA.”- he asked me as soon as everybody else was out of the room. I just looked at him and raised an eyebrow but didn’t reply. And (Y/N) turned to me wondering what he was talking about.

- “Morgan.”- Hotch raised an eyebrow and stared at Derek, who raised his hands and walked to the coffee pot.

- “What was that about?”- (Y/N) whispered as she stood next to me.

- “Just ignore him. I do”- I held my wife’s hand and kissed it. She smiled as I did and both of us pretended Morgan wasn’t there anymore.

During the rest of the afternoon, we analyzed unsolved strangulation cases within the geographical profile. I can’t say it was the best way to spend an afternoon, but at least I could spend the time with my wife. And the rest of the team.

- “How are you feeling?”- I whispered as I sat next to (Y/N) and noticed she had left half of her dinner untouched. We had ordered Chinese food for dinner for the team, and I knew she loved that.

- “I’m good”- my wife replied and continued reading.

- “You are not hungry? I thought you’d love dinner. It’s one of your favorites. You are not into Chinese anymore?”- my wife shrugged and looked at the files in her hands. JJ walked in sipping a gigantic soda, and I heard (Y/N) sighing. So that was it, she was self-conscious of her weight. It hurt me knowing my wife was so scared to gain weight during pregnancy. But most of all it pained me to know she was comparing herself with JJ. It was logical, JJ had had a kid and she hadn’t lost her figure after giving birth. But, how could I explain to my wife that I thought she was very sexy with that round tummy? I know I had told her, but clearly, it didn’t make any difference to her.

- “Chipmunk…”- I whispered, but JJ started talking about work, and (Y/N) ignored me to focus on her.

- “I have a 1989 strangulation victim dumped 10 miles from where the first body was found, only she was raped and stabbed.”

- “His comfort zone. Could be our unsub.”- (Y/N) said looking at the team.

- “Well, I've got two more, '01 and '03, except these took place in Clifford, Delaware. The M.O.'s an exact match.”- Rossi added and looked through the files he had read.

- “I got another one here from 2013, Scottsdale, Maryland.”- Morgan didn’t look from the papers as he spoke- “He was smart enough to cross state lines.”

- “The Crestview rapist was operating during that time.”- JJ pointed out. I looked at my wife for a moment, rubbed her tummy, and tried to focus on work, though most of my brain was trying to find a way to make her feel better.

- “The male unsub never went dormant. Only the female did.”- Derek said and there was a short pause.

- “So when this guy kills without his wife, his signature changes to stabbing and sexual assault.”- (Y/N) sighed after talking and she stood up to walk closer to the board and look at the crime scene pictures.

- “Well, stabbing is indicative of rage, and it's most likely towards women.”- Derek added.

- “And the sexual assault is his way of establishing dominance over them.”- Blake seemed focused, I wasn’t keeping track or paying much attention.

- “Maybe their marriage isn't as solid as we think.”- Rossi suggested- “Clearly he has issues that he's working out when the wife isn't around.”

I don’t know why Derek looked at me. I don’t know if he wanted to see if I reacted to that statement or if I was affected by it.

- “Well, if she emasculates her husband at home, that could be the reason why she now needs to have control over the murder.”- JJ proposed and Derek’s eyes could burn holes in my skull as she did.

- “Hey, guys, we have a survivor.”- my wife interrupted the moment and I moved closer to her to look at the file she was reading- “Hannah Franklin, a 23-year-old waitress who was attacked on her way home from work back in 2008.”

- “Do you have a contact number?”- Hotch asked as he looked at my wife from the other side of the room. She just nodded and grabbed the file with the information.

- “When she gets here, JJ, I need you to talk to her, and try to get as much information as possible.”

- “Can we talk? after you make that call.”- I whispered into my wife’s ear. She turned to me and nodded and in a second, she was out of the room.

- “Everything ok?”- Blake asked me and I just smiled and nodded as well.- “Everything ok with (Y/N)? She seemed a bit off yesterday.”

- “Yeah, she is ok.”- I paused and looked around for a second. - “Let me ask you this: did you guys eat anything this morning while we were out?”

- “Eat? take out?”- I nodded and Blake shook her head immediately- “This is the first meal I’ve seen since breakfast, and I nearly fainted. Why do you ask?”

- “It’s nothing, I’m just worried (Y/N) might be skipping meals.”

- “Is she still feeling sick?”

I didn’t want to tell my friend anything else about it, so I just agreed with her inference and watched my wife on the phone, just outside the room.

- “Well, being pregnant is very challenging. Your body keeps changing and whenever you feel like you are ok with the stage you have to face, your whole hormones go crazy and you lose it again.”- Blake explained and smiled at me- “She is lucky to have you. I can see you’ve been an amazing partner for her.”

- “Thank you.”- I think I blushed at those words because I knew Blake wasn’t saying that just to be polite. However, I didn’t feel like I was doing enough. I knew (Y/N) was going through something more complex than what she was sharing, and I needed to show her she could count on me.

(Y/N)’s point of view

The rush of emotions I had felt that entire day was crazy. It was my first pregnancy, and I didn’t know any better. I had no idea what was going on. One thing is reading about how much your body is gonna change and another completely different thing is feeling alienated from your own body.

I didn’t want to talk about it with Spencer. After what had happened the day before, I felt like oversharing my feelings and mental instability might drive him away. So I pretended to be ok. Which, of course, didn’t work because my husband is a genius and could read me like a book. Also, leaving my leftovers around hadn’t been very bright. I was still starving and wanted to eat what was left of my dinner. But when I looked at my swollen feet and round body, all I could think of was: you have to stop eating. Which I did.

- “Hey”- Spencer walked to me as I poured myself a cup of ginger tea- “I brought you your dinner.”

- “Thank you, honey bunny. But… I’m not hungry.”

- “You left pretty much all your sweet and sour pork, and I know you love it.”

- “Yeah, but… I’m full and despite what everybody says, I don’t have to eat for two.”- I sat down and stared at my hands as my husband followed my moves and sat next to me.

- “I know that. I’m just making sure you are getting enough nutrients and vitamins for our baby.”

- “I am, trust me. Our baby is fi…”- but before I could even finish that sentence, the weirdest and most beautiful feeling interrupted me. I opened my eyes wide and turned to Spencer. He stared at me confused and scared something was wrong. But everything was perfect.

- “What is it, chipmunk? are you ok?”- I grabbed his hand quickly and placed it on the side of my tummy- “Wh…”

- “Shh!”- I commanded and looked at him with tears in my eyes - “The baby is kicking.”

- “Wh.. wh.. are you sure?”- I couldn’t argue Spencer it was obvious I could feel a human kicking my guts from the inside out, because the baby suddenly moved and kicked again, and this time he felt it as well.

- “Oh… my… god.”- he whispered and looked at me, tears filling his eyes in a second. - “Our baby is right there.”

- “This is so weird…”- I had never even imagined what those kicks would feel like, and I wasn’t ready for them, at all. I looked at my husband, his eyes were beaming with happy tears as he kept his hand on my tummy, rubbing it and waiting for our baby to kick again.

- “That’s…”- he whispered and peered at me, analyzing my reaction - “Does it hurt?”

- “No, it’s just.. odd.”

- “Come here.”- he moved his chair closer to mine and cupped my face with both of his hands - “I love you so much, (Y/N). So, so much. I still can’t believe we are gonna have a baby.”

- “Your baby is kicking already, so you better believe it.”- I joked and he chuckled as he rubbed his lips against mine. Spencer kissed me gently and sweetly. I didn’t last long, because we were at work, but it was the kind of loving kiss that gave me a peaceful feeling in my heart.

- “Reid.”- Hotch said as he walked into the room and looked at me. It was weird at the beginning when I changed my last name and our Unit Chief started calling me by Spencer’s. Now I was used to it, though most police forces and sometimes the rest of the team were often confused.

- “We got a suspect. I need you to talk to the wife. Judith Anderson.”

- “Right away. Tell me what we have.”

I knew Hotch and Spencer were with Blake behind the window, analyzing every second of my interview with the suspect. I guessed because I was pregnant, my Unit Chief thought the unsub wouldn’t see me as a threat. I asked the cop in the interrogation room to uncuff her and sat in front of her. She was small, red-haired, and looked like she knew exactly what was happening.

- “Hi, Judith. My name is (Y/N). Can I get you anything to drink?”- I tried to be nice and welcoming.

- “I’d like to make a phone call.”- she replied right away.

- “To who? Your husband?”- I questioned her and Judith didn’t answer. - “You're coming up on your 20th anniversary. Congratulations. That is a huge accomplishment.”

Judith glued her eyes to my wedding and engagement ring for a few seconds. She didn’t say anything, she just sat there and stared at me. So I continued talking.

- “We recovered a used condom with Alan's DNA in it. Nothing odd about that, except you've had a hysterectomy. So, why use condoms if you can't conceive?”

- “You seem to know a lot. You tell me.”- Judith finally answered, and her voice was menacing. But I just shrugged and sighed, playing innocent.

- “Well, you just don't strike me as the unfaithful type. I mean, Alan, on the other hand, he's a different story.”

- “You know nothing about my husband!”- clearly I hit a sensitive nerve, ‘cos her face changed completely.

- “Well, actually, I know a lot.”- I opened my case file and started listing everything we had on them- “Let’s see. I know your husband tested positive for an STD back in 2010. You two were married in 1994, which tells me he isn't as committed to your marriage as you think.”- I made a short pause and stared at her, waiting to see if she had anything to add. And she did.

- “There was a point in time when both of us were unfaithful in our marriage. When I found out he had cheated…”

- “You thought if you retaliated it would make you feel better.”- I interrupted her, nodding, showing her I understood what had happened.

- “My husband and I no longer keep secrets. I've known he's had an STD for years. The reason we use condoms, to answer your question, is because he insists on protecting me. That's how much he loves me.”

I smiled at her and nodded again. Then, I stood up and started opening all the case files for the investigations of the murders that we knew her husband had committed.

- “I can't wait to see where this is headed.”- Judith smiled and looked at the files I was placing in front of her. I just exhaled and stood in front of her.

- “When you discovered your husband was cheating, you took away the one thing that mattered most to him. His partner in crime.”- I told her and made a short pause- “Now, how do you think he dealt with that?”- but her face didn’t make a move.

- “Do you recognize any of these women?”- Judith didn’t even look at the pictures, she just stared at me with her best poker face.

- “How many times are we gonna go through this? No, I do not.”- she wasn’t even raising her face, I wasn’t reacting to anything. So I just continued.

- “And these are only a few of the victims that he raped and murdered without you.”- finally, I could see her facade starting to shatter- “And which one do you think gave him the STD? Just take a look for yourself.”

And she finally did. She scanned the pictures right in front of her and tried to maintain her attitude.

- “His DNA is all over each of these women.”- I continued talking - “It's the killing without you that's most painful. It's the cheating that you can't forgive.”

- “You're married.”- Judith said and looked at me with cold eyes.

- “Yes, I am.”

- “Where's your husband?”

- “Standing right behind that glass.”- I replied and pointed at the one at my back.

- “Huh, so you know what it feels like to share an interest with your husband. What would happen if he were to slip up? If he is a Fed who can cover his tracks, how would you know?”- I smiled at her words and simply answered:

- “A wife knows. Which is why you know I'm telling you the truth.”

- “My husband and I aren't perfect.”

- “No marriage is, Judith, but look at these women. Look at the way he treated them.”- she closed her eyes for a moment and refused to look at the victims. Instead, she started explaining.

- “We're rebuilding step by step, brick by brick…”

- “He hates them because he hates you.”- I ignored her words, and she lost it.

- “He loves me! I want to talk to a lawyer!”

And that was the end of my interview. Luckily, we had enough to find and catch her husband before he would kill again.

- “We are rebuilding step by step”- I said as soon as I walked into the room from where Rossi and Spencer were following my interrogation- “Interesting choice of words.”

- “Oh, I've heard those many times before.”- Rossi started talking as my husband handed me a packet of cashew nuts.

- “Where?”- Spencer innocently asked David.

- “Somewhere you two will never go. Marriage counseling.”- I chuckled at those words and opened the snack my husband had given me, ‘cos I was starving.

- “That would explain how they were able to move through Alan's infidelity.”- I said as I chewed and hummed happily- “They were seeing a therapist.”

- “Maybe they still are.”- Spencer suggested and grabbed his phone.

And he was right. They were seeing a therapist to work on their issues as a couple. And Spencer profiled that the emasculation our unsub felt didn't come from his wife. It came from their therapist.

I was left at the station with Rossi and Blake, while Spencer and Morgan drove to the therapist's office, she was the last victim, and we were against time to save her life. Meanwhile, I sat in the kitchenette and swallowed my leftovers, because I was too hungry to keep living. Besides, the anxiety of having Spencer on the field dealing with a serial killer made me feel uneasy, and eating was a way to deal with it.

- “How are you feeling?”- Blake asked as she walked into the room and headed straight to the coffee machine.

- “Like I could sleep for two days. You?”- I replied and continued chewing my sweet and sour pork.

- “I just wanna spend the entire weekend in my pajamas watching movies. That would be my perfect Valentine's”- Blake answered and sat next to me. Great, I had totally forgotten about Valentine’s Day, again. - “You did great with Judith.”

- “Thank you. It was hard to remain calm knowing she was trying to protect a serial killer and a cheating bastard.”- I mumbled as I continued chewing. Alex just smiled and held her cup with both hands.

- “Hungry?”

- “Starving. I feel like Kirby.”

- “Who?”- Blake didn’t know who Kirby was, so I swallowed my food and explained in the easiest way possible.

- “It’s a videogame character, it basically eats everything in front of him. I feel like that most of the time ‘cos I am always hungry.”

- “Spencer was worried you might be skipping meals.”

- “I know.”

- “You know this is just temporary. While you have an actual human growing inside of you.”- I chuckled at Alex's explanation and nodded- “You will be who you were before.”

- “Rationally, I know that. But an irrational part of my brain takes charge of my thoughts and emotions at the worst possible moments.”- I explained to Blake, knowing she would understand. I didn’t feel like talking with many people about my feelings at that point. As I said, I felt I was losing my sanity, and I hated it when people were condescending to me just because I was pregnant.

- “You probably are. You are pregnant, it’s a complicated process.”- Blake sipped her coffee and I finished my pork. I was suddenly in the mood for some dessert, but I knew there was nothing left in my bag.

- “It’s useless to talk to you about the hormone levels changing, right?”

- “Trust me, Alex, Spencer started reading the books the second I told him I was pregnant. That means I’ve heard his talks about pregnancy for the last nineteen weeks.”- she chuckled at my words as I sighed and continued - “Knowing why it happens doesn’t help stop it from happening. And sometimes I overthink every single little thing until I feel like I’m losing my mind.”

- “You are not, (Y/N). Trust me.”- Blake smiled and caressed my hand for a second. - “We all feel like shit during the whole process, and no one but we can understand it. So, if you ever need to talk about it, I am here.”

- “Thank you.”

Spencer’s point of view

We solved the case and made it back to DC on time to spend our Valentine’s Day at home. I had reservations for (Y/N)’s favorite restaurant, but we both agreed we were too tired to leave the house, so we changed plans and decided for some delivery and relax on the couch, watching a movie.

I honestly didn’t care what we did for our Valentine’s, as long as we were together, I was always happy. But I couldn’t help but feel my wife’s disappointment with the plans, even though they had been mostly her idea. She was extra exhausted after the case and the trip, of course staying at home made perfect sense.

I filled the tub with hot water, salts, and bubbles while my wife prepared a tray with snacks to share after dinner, knowing it was most likely she’d start craving something sweet, sour, or probably both. I lit a few candles and held (Y/N)’s hand as I walked her to our bathroom.

- “What are you doing?”- she giggled as I covered her eyes and guided her through our apartment.

- “Just because we are staying at home doesn’t mean we can’t make this a romantic moment.”- I explained and uncovered her eyes.

- “Oh, honey bunny.”- she gasped as she looked at the tub, filled with bubbles. - “This is perfect.”

- “You deserve a moment to relax.”

- “Are you gonna get into that tub with me?”- she asked and I nodded.

- “Anything you want.”

We brought two cups of peppermint tea and got in before the water got cold. (Y/N) hummed in satisfaction as she sank, and I sat right behind her, feeling her back resting against my chest. I kissed her neck and wrapped my arms around her, my hands took a second to find her tummy, and I started caressing it right away.

- “Wanna know something embarrassing?”- I whispered in her ear and she nodded immediately.- “Ever since you told me you were pregnant, I’ve been scared you are gonna blame me for making you go through all those changes and awkward moments.”

- “I could never blame you… I was as horny as you were when we did this, and we both wanted to have a kid.”- she whispered and though I couldn’t see her face, I knew she was smiling.

- “I know pregnancy has been getting more challenging.”- I said after a moment - “I just want you to know I’m here. And nothing will ever change that.”- she didn’t say a word, I just felt her sigh and saw her fingers play with the bubbles around her. It took a few minutes until my wife finally opened up about what she was going through.

- “You know how people always say our story is like a fairy tale?”

- “They do?”- I questioned surprised.

- “Every single time I tell people our story, they think it’s fanfiction or a fairy tale.”- (Y/N) made a pause, probably picking the right words to explain her mind. - “I know you loved me for years before we started dating. The same way I loved you in silence. I know you waited for me, you took care of me, you were always there.”

- “And I will always be.”- I whispered and kissed her temple.

- “That’s what I keep doubting now. I’m sorry.”- her voice was barely perceptible.

- “But what makes you doubt me?”

- “It’s not you.”- my wife replied before I could even finish asking, - “I just feel like… you deserve better than me.”

I felt my heart shatter with those words, ‘cos how could anyone be better than her? How could anyone make me feel the things she did? No one else had that smile that made me feel weak in the knees since the day I met her. She was the only woman on earth I wanted. And I had always felt like she deserved better than me.

- “How could I ever think that way when I have the most perfect, smart, and gorgeous woman on earth here in this tub with me?”- I murmured, holding her tight against me and peeping kisses on her cheek and neck.

- “Spencer…”- I hated when she called me by my name outside work. It always meant she was being serious.

- “Mrs. Reid, trust me when I tell you, nothing will change the way I feel for you right here, right now.”- She moved from my arms and turned in the tub to look at me. - “I dreamed of this life with you for so long, I will do whatever it takes to keep you by my side and make you happy.”

- “I feel like I’m going insane, hon. I yelled at you in the car the other day because you didn’t reply to my texts. That’s not me! And I’m jealous of JJ ‘cos she looks gorgeous after having a baby and I feel like a whale. And I can’t stop eating, I try to stop, but I’m hungry all the time, and moody and my feet are swollen already and I’m just nineteen weeks pregnant!”

Tears fell from her eyes as she continued talking and I carefully wiped them away from her cheeks with my thumb.

- “Look at me, I can’t believe I am crying over this! I cry all the time now! Why does everything make me so emotional? Stupid hormones!”

- “I am so in love with you, nothing will ever change that. I will love you until my very last day and most likely, from beyond my grave. So trust me, please.”- I whispered and cupped her cheeks with both my hands, staring into her eyes as I spoke.

- “I feel like if I tell you everything that happens inside my head, you will run away from me.”

- “Never.”- I rubbed my lips against her and kissed her, sweet and slowly, feeling her whole body relaxing.

- “I’m sorry”- she whispered and rested her forehead against mine.

- “You have nothing to apologize for, chipmunk. Did you know that some studies suggest that as many as 90% of new mothers experience unwanted thoughts related to their child during pregnancy or shortly after birth?”- my wife smiled as I kissed her one more time.

- “I love it when you drop statistics.”

- “I have more.”- I replied and heard her chuckling, one of my favorite sounds.

- “Can’t say I’m surprised.”

- “But instead of statistics, I was thinking you should just lay here against me again and I could read to you for a little. What do you think?”

- “I don’t deserve you.”- my wife whispered and I shook my head immediately.

- “You deserve everything I can do to make you happy, ‘cos you make me the happiest I ever dreamed I could be, ok?”- she sobbed and nodded. I kissed her again and then helped her move back to her original position in that tub, lying against my chest. I grabbed a book from the side of the bathtub, kissed her temple one more time, and started reading “Wuthering Heights” for her. 

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[stormblessed95]

Watching Are You Sure?! EP 4

A reminder of how I do these reaction posts as I watch things. I just write my reactions and thoughts down literally they happen. Think more of a bullet point format. I'll include links when I can to videos, thanks to the people who twt who upload clips. And at the end, I'll do a better wrap up of all my opinions. I hope everyone enjoyed the show so far!!

Jungkook calling Jimin Hyungnim was so cute. Followed by the exaggerated listening of instructions to loosen his shoulders lol. And they way Jimin is so fond of JK enjoying riding 🥰

Jimin comparing the moon to which moon phase it is on his back is amazing for me personally thanks

Wait! Pausing to go make myself some tea to drink with them while they have their meal at the Japanese restaurant! 🥰🥰

Jikook are muscle memory kinda touchy man

Tae annoying Jimin with all his headbanging and ending up with a sore neck that Jimin massages for him 🥰 lol why doesn't JKs neck also hurt? Apparently he has a thick neck 🤣

JK filming all their food again 🥺 and I Love his reactions to good food! Tae too. Lol I just know that chef loved having them there appreciating his food so much! I don't even like sushi and they made me believe I would enjoy it 🤣

And he did!

Tae asking why RM wasn't here and Jikook immediately being like excuse you, it's a show just for the two of us. We barely let you in here to guest star because you wanted to and we love you 🤣 Tae "I felt that, thank you" 🤣🤣

V calling Joonie to ask for him to send him come back to me, the song he sang at D day 🥺🥺🥺 and expressing his sincere appreciation for it and for RM. God, my emotions! Tae wanting to crawl inside Namjoons brain basically is so relatable.

Jimin's little smile when Tae played Alone saying he really liked it 🥺🥺 I LOVE hearing them talk music together. It's his favorite song off Face 🥺🥰

Tae saying it (Face/Alone) reminded him of when they (Vmin) talked in your (Jimins) hotel room. Just for Jimin to say that it was JKs room. This just also gives that little bit of confirmation that Jikook are constantly glued at the hip. Always together. Might as well just get them the one room anyway 😂

Jimin taking his shirt off when they get inside and JK immediately being unable to take his eyes off him no matter how hard he tried. 😂🤣 It would've looked less sus at this point to have just openly looked at him sweetie lol

Idk what Jimin's thoughts were when he first got in that pool with Jungkook, but he looked mischievous. Idk what he was going to pull, but it was something inappropriate. Lol the way JK immediately reminded him of the see through glass, "hey babe, the staff and cameras will see EVERYTHING you do next, underwater is NOT safe" and the way they both immediately whipped their heads over to look at it and nervously chuckled. Like kids who got caught with their hand in the cookie jar 😅😂🤣

The hand pushing game that competitive JK has never once "attacked" in when against Jimin. 😂

So so many cuts in the pool. Wonder how long they stayed in there playing 🥰

Jikook wanting to show off their underwater game to Tae lmao who is not interested 😂 Tae just wants to go to bed 😂🤣 not them just watching Tae get ready for bed like absolute creepers 🤣🤣

You are me, I am you underwater 😍😍😍

I'm pretty sure Jimin just propositioned Jungkook after swimming. Idk what he planned to do about it since they are sharing a bedroom with Tae lmfao but I'm fairly sure that's what he did. He was "really craving it" lmfao the way JK laughed and smacked him for the flirting too? 😅😂 The "you don't have to eat. I can it all" is giving "what? I can do it by myself, no worries" type of flirting teasing. If we are going to be continuing with the innuendos 😂😂

Jikook domestically sharing the bathroom. For their showers too? Lol idk. But the way they've got their suitcases spread open next to each other and just pulling from both too? So domestic.the way they sat on the little cushions before bed too leaned all into each other, watching JKs performance on his phone and talking about what he needs to do/film, etc. So fucking domestic

JK saying he hasn't slept at all since NY. Poor baby is so fucking busy. I'm also not saying he sleeps better with Jimin, but I'm also not not saying that

Tae took Jimin's bed (lol?) and Jikook just automatically running for JKs bed and flipping into it all cuddled up together? The only nighttime time lapse we've gotten so far. Lol when they have an additional person in the room anyway 😂 think Tae knew they'd enjoy sharing the bed anyway so felt safe taking Jimins? 😂 The way JK woke up briefly and turned to check on Jimin before moving to the 3rd bed to get snuggled under the covers. That was honestly so cute. Domesticcccc

So much has happened and I'm not even halfway through. Wtf

Tae's poor neck is still sore. Lmao baby you are getting older I guess. No excessive headbanging allowed anymore! Asking JK to massage it for him and JK taking care of it was soooo cute

Jungkookie's mom calling him and asking what was up and bringing up that he was with Jimin twice and confirming he (they?) were coming home for Chuseok 🥺 that was genuinely so cute and sweet

Tae offering to pluck Jimin's one long beard hair for him. Their cute sleepy faces 🥺

Tae offering and giving Jimin a massage while he sings Tae's Slow Dancing. They are so fucking cute I cannot handle myself. Vminkook massage train is something I need. Lol give it to me 😂

Jimin speeding up to pass taekook on their bikes and them both whipping their heads around to look and smile at him was so cute lol and the way they danced at lights too. Adorable. And taekook playing word games!!

The way JK surprised Jimin by hitting the table because he was so excited to eat the food! Lol

Tae just wanting to drop the knowledge that he knows Jimin super well because he knew he wouldn't want a soda while he ate 😂 I love him

JK once again filming his food and filming his Jimin

Jiminie needs a clip or mini ponytail lmfao he keeps holding his bangs back while trying to eat 😂

LOL THEY GOT HIM ONE! and it's adorable!! I wish they showed us whichever Noona came running over to pin his hair for him and the vminkook giggles I'm sure followed 😂🥰 maybe in the behinds lol

Tae calling Jimin Serendipity was 🥺😍🥺😍

Sometimes the giant ass bites they take of food worries me that they might choke 😅 maybe it's the mom in me lol

JK: "you're not a big eater"

JM: "no, I ate a lot. You just eat loads" lmfao

Jimin waxing poetic about Tan 🥺🥺🥺

JK saying that seeing Tan on Vs promos made him miss Bamie 😭🥺

I can't tell if Tae asking JK about paying and JK saying to wire him the money was a skit or not 🤣 probably because it felt like such a normal conversation if my friends and I went out to eat 😅😂 the giggles gave me skit vibes though lol

The cutest little cafe! And Jimins absolute excitement when he spots the cat inside! It's the cafe from Tae's selfies he posted with Jikook!

Vmin constantly with the romance skits lmao

Jikook with the strangers to lovers first time meet cute skits as always too lol

Who was Tae talking to about working out?? Lol

The extremely good looking server Tae skit 😍

The Vmin bickering followed by a cut of them sitting in their own seats and the editor caption of "we don't fight" lmfao show us the rest of their bickering editors!

Jimin saying to look at the pretty clouds and JK following that up with the incredibly cheesy flirty "you're prettier Jimin" and Jimin being so over his cheesiness was amazing. I loved it so much. JK can be such a flirt sometimes and it always flusters Jimin lmao

Vmin talking about how JK is so much stronger than they are. Tae saying that's true but he would never pretend to cower and Jimin saying he isn't pretending, he is just actually scared lmao

"Raggedy Jungkook is back" JK will never live that tan line down. Lol Jimin joining in and then making Tae join in too, he looked so unamused. Lol They are absolutely ridiculous 😂 JK out on so much sunscreen 😂 anytime be does anything ridiculous though it's so cute how he immediately looks for Jimins reaction, to make sure it made him laugh and smile 🥰

Poor Tae's neck is still hurting! I hope he feels better!

Poor JK, hitting his head on the boat and Jimins immediate CPR rescue lmfao!

Jimin's amazing jump and JKs perfect dive!

Tae also hitting his head on the boat! My poor babies lmao! I was going to say the boat needs a watch your head sign, but it has one 🤣

Mermaid Jimin 😍

JK swimming up to Jimin and holding onto him briefly and humming through his snorkel 🥰 the way that even playing in the ocean, they are basically stuck like glue to each other too. The arms around each other while swimming was so cute!

JK and Jimin sharing a bowl of Ramen! The way JK takes a bite, puts the rest of the noodles he bit off of back in the bowl and hands it off to Jimin. By far not the worst way they've shared food (hello lemon) lol but still!

Tae calling the captain over to help him reel the "big fish!" He caught in just for the captain to tell him it was a rock 🤣🤣 Watching the maknae line struggle to fish makes me miss Yoonjin! I need to see Jins reaction to this part of the episode actually lmfao

Not the drone sacrificing itself to the sea 🤣🤣 the confused crew and JKs shook face!!

Tae finally caught 2 fish!! Good job!!! The way he left JM and JK take pictures with his fish like they caught them too 🥺😍🥰

Watching the sunset, Jimin going "this is romantic" 🥺🥺🥺 followed promptly be him getting down to cuddle JK while he records the sunset is so fucking cute.

Jikook cloud watching! This is where they draw their whale cloud picture together 🤣😂 the giggles! They are so precious!!

Tae finally coming to join Jikook in laying down in the boat together (where was he?!) I just love seeing them be so at peace together 🥰🥰🥰 the amount of "I love this" that occured brings me SUCH happiness

Wrap up Thoughts:

A reminder, to also myself that this was filmed Sept 25 - 27th of 2023 and was Chuseok right after they landed 😊 where Tae posted his sunset photo from Jeju that he took while they were on this boat together!

Istg there were so many cuts. I feel like we barely ever got to even see a full conversation. I get that there is 24 hours basically of footage for one day that they trim to an hour of content, but I beg for some continuity. This is why people make analysis posts editors?! You give them too much wiggle room and never a consistent timeline!

Jikook had an extra domestic energy to them this episode, even with all the playing and giggling happening too. Idk what caused the energy shift, maybe just Jimin not feeling sick for once. And with the added bonus of knowing they made the choice to apply for the buddy system too.

They were so cuddly and sweet and observant to each other's ever need. Jimin loves him some biker JK too 😂 and God, JK just never stops calling Jimin pretty. I truly love that for them. So much

The energy with another member around really did just draw out how different Jikooks dynamic is with each other at times.

Say what you want, JKs call with his mother was the sweetest little interlude ever and it absolutely sounded like his mom was calling to confirm he was bringing his boyfriend home for the holiday. Lol I know Jimin went to see his parents too, but that's the energy that call gave! I can't help it!

This was their second trip to Jeju, since they went together in August too. And they flew back home and basically went straight to Busan together to visit their families for Chuseok. I'm so so glad they got to do all that together. I can't wait for the next episode to see how they end their Jeju vacation!

[morganaspendragonss]

be positive though it hurts

based on the promo pic of tk sitting at owen's desk. i know they're for ep 6 but uhhhhh i don't care title from better son/daughter by rilo kiley

ao3 | 1.2k | owen and tk, 5.05 spec

On his way out the station, TK pauses glances up into his dad’s office. Their shift is over but he’s still in uniform, sitting behind his desk and frowning at something on his laptop. Things have been so busy in the firehouse lately, what with the lack of a lieutenant, though Judd had been so much more than that. It left little time for him and his dad to talk even when they spent 24 hours on the same shift, especially when that was compounded with TK’s own…problems.

But Paul has plugged the gap now, and Judd is back, and TK really, really needs some advice. True, his dad isn’t the first person that springs to mind when it comes to marital struggles, but it’s also true that there’s no-one TK trusts more than his dad, save Carlos. 

Well… Save Carlos, usually. TK doesn’t really know right now.

Mind made up, TK turns on his heel and jogs up the stairs, hesitating only another second before he strides up and knocks on the office door.

“TK!” his dad exclaims, instantly slamming his laptop shut with a bit too much force. “Come in!”

“I’m not interrupting, am I?” he asks, though he heads straight for the other chair anyway. “Was that important?”

“Nah,” he dad dismisses, in a tone that suggests it was definitely important. “Besides, what are lieutenants for if not to do the work their captain doesn’t want to?”

“Right.” TK chuckles but it fades quickly as the familiar weight of what he’s here to talk about settles back down on his chest. “Um… So.”

“So.”

His dad waits patiently, lounging casually in his chair while TK feels like he’s vibrating in his. He leans forward and folds his arms on top of the desk, trapping his hands under his elbows to stop them from shaking.

“Things have been…not great, lately. At home,” he starts.

His dad’s frown returns and he sits up, concerned. “How do you mean?”

“I…” TK hesitates again, because who is he to be spilling Carlos’s dirty laundry? Telling his dad feels like a betrayal, and also like an admission of failure, that he’s continuing the Strand men’s legacy of screwing up their marriages. Well, their branch of the family’s legacy, anyway. His Uncle Robert had seemed pretty solid, but that’s a whole other can of worms that TK cannot open right now.

“I love Carlos,” he states, to a nod from his dad. “And I have tried to help him. He was so great after Mom died, you know, and all I want is to be there for him like he was for me. It’s just… Sometimes it feels like he won’t let me.”

“It can’t be easy on him,” his dad points out. Then he levels TK with a knowing look, matching his position on the desk. “Or on you.”

“Yeah,” TK agrees. “And our anniversary is coming up, but it’s not the only one, and it’s like the other one is overshadowing ours, but that’s really selfish to think, right? I’m not mad at him for grieving or for trying to solve his dad’s case, but I am mad at him, Dad. I’m mad at him because he works too hard and he’s always tired, he–” He cuts himself off before he can spill about Carlos falling asleep on him the other night. TK is fairly used to his dad knowing entirely too much about his sex life, but Carlos definitely isn’t and TK can’t bring himself to talk about this behind his back.

“Anyway. We’re just having trouble…connecting lately.”

“Ah.” His dad nods sagely, and TK’s ears turn pink as he realises he inadvertently told him everything anyway. “Listen, we all go through dry spells, son. Especially in times like these. Just give Carlos some time, and I’m sure you’ll be back on track by next week. Two weeks, tops.”

TK drops his head in his hands and groans. “Dad, that’s not–”

And, okay, yes, he misses sex with Carlos. But it’s just one thing in a long line of reasons why he feels like they’re drifting apart, and honestly it’s pretty low down on his priorities. Not that he doesn’t want–

They’re digressing. 

“That’s not the point,” he says quietly. He takes a deep breath and doesn’t look his dad in the eye as he confesses, “We’re going to counselling tomorrow.”

“Counselling?”

When TK chances a glance up, he finds his dad’s eyebrows have shot up to his hairline. He’s looking at TK with a mix of shock and trepidation, which sets something unpleasant churning in TK’s stomach.

“Son, are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“You think it’s not?”

“Well, what does Carlos think?”

TK sighs. “He doesn’t think we need it,” he admits. “It took a while to convince him. Plus, the only time he’d agree to give up was his lunch break, so we only have thirty minutes and then he’s going to go straight back to work.” He shakes his head and slumps in the chair, meeting his dad’s eyes desperately. “I don’t know what to do, Dad.”

“Well, I can’t tell you that, son,” his dad says. “But I do know that marriage is hard and you are going to go through tough times, especially in the first years when you’re getting used to the change. That doesn’t mean you need counselling.”

“So you do think it’s a bad idea.”

“I didn’t say that.”

TK rubs his temple; sometimes talking with his dad makes his head hurt. “So what are you saying?”

“Okay,” his dad says, pacifying, which rankles TK a little. “All I’m saying is, all couples have issues. Also, your mother and I tried couples counselling, and if we weren’t thinking about divorce before, we certainly were after.”

The comment sends a shot of fear through TK’s heart, and more than a little nausea too. He hates the idea of his own marriage being compared to his parents’, hates the thought that they will end up going down the same path.

And yet. Within the fear and the panic, there’s calm. Because TK knows that he and Carlos are stronger than that, and he knows that they have put the work in to build firmer foundations than his parents’ relationship was ever based on.

“Carlos and I aren’t you and Mom,” he says firmly, confidently, meeting his dad’s gaze head on.

There’s a moment of silence as his dad considers him, and then he smiles gently. “No, son. You’re not.”

For how strong TK was in his conviction, it’s still a relief to hear another person say it out loud. “I really want to work things out for us.”

“I know you do.” His dad raises a pointed eyebrow. “I know you both do.”

TK nods. “I know that too.”

“I think you know more about being a husband than I ever did,” his dad remarks, then he stands and rounds the desk, gesturing at TK to stand up. When he does, he pulls him into a tight hug. “I’m proud of you, son.”

TK buries his head in his dad’s shoulder, some of the weight easing. “Thanks, Dad.”

[glasskey]

Nick & June's Mix tape Vol. 3

With volume 3 comes the battle for Holly, separation and the unveiling of painful secrets. Season 3 was notoriously poor to our 2 lovers with June becoming seriously twitchy without Nick, Hannah or Holly. Gilead is Hell.

What Are You Good For?

Love in Gilead is less than ideal. One day you’re dreaming about a beautiful beach with your beloved and the next he’s been promoted to Top Boy at the local horror show. Granted he looks great in the suit but Nick doesn’t seem to like the new tie, grabbing at it like the tightening noose that it actually is. Fred was obviously pissed about the baby snatching and his “reward” for Nick was to arrange a promotion complete with a quick trip to the front, undoubtedly to die.

I’ve often said that Nick sometimes DOES listen to his better angels and sometimes he takes the easy way out. Granted it’s difficult he’s stuck between a rock and a hard place, but when June asks him to take the high road, hightailing it with her and Hannah for the border, and he doesn’t, it earns him a brutal verbal slap.

“What are you good for?” she demands and I was instantly reminded of S1 when June confronted him with his lowly aspirations: “Is this it? You’re just gonna polish his car and once in a while get a Handmaid pregnant?” In both of these moments Blaine looks deeply shamed, June has shown him that while she loves him she’s also acutely aware of his shortcomings.

It’s a justified blow to his ego, particularly given his newly acquired power and his reluctance to use it for good. As she demonstrates her willingness to risk so much more for freedom, he’s left feeling like a small and suitably chided man, instead of the patriarchal Gilead’s new Big Commander. “You’ll get killed” June says with a cold finality as he tells her that he’s been sent to the front, confronting him with the reality that his unquestioning loyalty to Gilead will now surely cost him his life. It’s madness.

This is one of the only scenes where Nick and June are not depicted in a glowing light, it’s difficult to ignore that Nick is now almost swallowed by the shadows. Over the last 2 seasons, they’ve become one another’s beacon of joy and hope and there’s a palpable air of desolation and sorrow here, as these two bid each other goodbye, possibly forever. The camera reveals Nick and June divided by a wall, Nick unwilling to leave her, his back literally pinned to the wall by the heavy weight of Gilead.

June opens the door, gently reaches around, sensing him waiting, somehow their hands finding one another and she leads him out of the dark hallway and back into her room. Doors often represent entrances to other worlds and here we see June reach across the divide to return him to her side, once again. The lock snaps shut signalling an almost unheard of privacy. There’s a sense of finality in it too, as though it may be the last time these two see sanctuary for a long time, if ever again. It’s no more than 10 seconds of screen time and yet it encapsulates their relationship so perfectly. Nick constantly waiting in the shadows, bound by duty, and June always reaching across the divide to bring him in from the cold.

Nice Girl Like You in A Place Like This

The DC episode ranks right up there with the Boston Globe episode as one of the most important and insightful for this entire series. In Ep 6 June witnesses for the first time the absolute devastation this dictatorship has unleashed on her countries seat of power. Fittingly Fred has selected new wave DC as the location to construct his own personal piece of propaganda in an attempt to force the Canadians to hand Nicole back. June’s depicted glowering with vast angel wings, a monolith of power and holy vengeance. In the middle of Fred’s little directorial debut, Nick strolls in and June does the trademark jaw drop. Fred wants to know what he’s doing there, after all he had arranged for him to be shipped off to the front after the whole holding him at gun point / baby napping thing. Despite Fred’s best efforts though, it seems that not only does Blaine continue to breath, but he’s also shown up to visit his girlfriend.

Now if you thought Blaine looked good in a suit, wait till you see him draped in long, dark, tailor made, hotness. It’s obvious there’s a new kind of swagger to him and as he steps up next to June he brushes her hand and drops the line “Nice girl like you doing in a place like this?” It’s a line lifted from a Scorsese film of the same name and Blaine’s used it to flirtatiously lighten the intensely grim mood. He knows DC is Hell but he also knows June is anything but a “Nice Girl”, she blushes barely containing a smile and he smirks.

Fred and Serena can’t help but notice it and Fred’s seething with jealousy. There’s a close shot of Serena’s false finger clenching, a sign of the love lost between her and Fred, that contrasts directly against Nick and June’s hand brushing. Exchanges between Fred and Nick reek of power and control. Fred directs Nick to do his bidding, maneuvering him across the stage and verbally leashing him by calling him son, once again reducing him to a subordinate. Fred makes June kneel down for the camera, and Blaine looks away unable to watch. Unbeknownst to Fred, this will be the last time he ever exercises this type of control over Blaine.

This is Your One Chance

Here we got our epic movie moment for the series, It was like Gone with the Wind and Dr Zhivago all rolled up into one big romantic snow globe. June runs out to meet Nick her hair and cape fluttering behind her freely, a stark contrast to the DC handmaids brutally silenced. It demonstrates the freedom she feels he brings her. Nick, however seems to want nothing to do with June’s gamble on the Swiss that involves him laying his neck on the line and entwining himself in yet another Governments manoeuvrings for power. I, for one could hardly blame him; the last time he got involved with politics he ended up in the bottomless pit that is Gilead and he’s been unsuccessfully digging his way out ever since.

Add to this the fact that the last time he tried to help June, a multitude of people risked their lives and most certainly died, and you have one understandably reluctant Commander. But he’s helpless, she forces him to look in her eyes, tears streaming down her face and tells him that it’ll be his one opportunity to truly show his love and fealty for his daughter.

Now while some may doubt that Blaine ever showed up to speak with the Swiss, I can guarantee that this little exchange ensured that he did. The fact is, Blaine is a sucker for the loyalty card and once June played it, it was a done deal. Scenes are cut and included for a reason and as we know, in The Handmaid’s Tale, even the smallest scene is there for a reason. Show runners went to the effort of showing Blaine at the embassy being called to give information; he showed up, albeit reluctantly, and despite the fact that it all went sideways, writers still wanted you to know that. Unfortunately the reality is, he just couldn’t face her after it did all go to shit, and as a result he beat a hasty and somewhat cowardly exit to the front.

He knew the Swiss would soon tell her he’d been part of the Sons of Jacob who’d been integral to the inception of Gilead, something he’d kept hidden from her for some time now, and she’d be suitably mortified. June IS devastated, she looks out on the glowing playroom once filled with happy children that lies noticeably empty and silent. It reflects her isolation and sense of abandonment; perhaps the family she envisioned with Blaine was just a fantasy.

DC was an episode designed to illustrate the total destruction of all of our personal and societal freedoms under Gilead. To properly demonstrate this writers pulled the rip cord on any emotional support June may have previously had, this included breaking her and Serena up and having Nick leave her somewhat high and dry. It was essential to illustrate Nick was manipulated and part of the Gilead machine from the beginning. It was difficult to watch, given his devotion, but from the moment I saw him cloaked from head to foot in black, practically swallowed by his uniform, I knew it was inevitable that at least for now, Gilead pulled the strings.

In our next 2 Nick and June Mix tapes I’ll be covering Season 4, which was somewhat kinder to the Osblaine fans. Back soon.

[flicklikesstuff]

Hazbin Hotel Ep 8 Ramble and Theory

⚠️ SPOILERS!! ⚠️

Surprisingly, the show’s first season really got me hooked with its storyline and I can’t wait what’s in store for the upcoming season 2.

I’ve had my suspicions with Alastor since the pilot, and it just keeps growing with every episode. Even then, his real motivations are just hard to really see and it’s what makes his character intriguing. One moment, he’s lurking in the shadows like some sort of villain, and then the next, we see him maaaybe caring for his friends?? If he even considers them that. Idk 🤷

I’ve always thought that maybe he’s sticking around and playing nice to get Charlie’s guard down in the long run. Waiting for her to get desperate so he can strike a deal with her. So he could ask her for any favour in the future. And guess what? That’s what he exactly does in Ep 7.

And if I’m recalling correctly, Alastor helped Charlie with the war, but Charlie is yet to grant her own end of the deal. Alastor STILL is owed a favour from her.

(Where am I going with this theory and analysis? I’m getting there-)

At one point, maybe he did genuinely care for the hotel and the people in it. Regardless what his motives were. He even admits it’s a “surprising thrill” to watch them form connections. But the word choices he uses in this scene are just sooo…weird?

“Almost??” “Could get accustomed??”

It sounds like he admits feeling attached to the other characters but at the same time, doesn’t want to commit to it. Does he have far more nefarious intentions in mind for them and that’s why he’s so distant?

Alastor probably noticed this in the ending of Ep 8 too. His altruistic self almost got control of him. He almost risked his life to help his “friends.” And he didn’t like that one bit. Perhaps, he sees this trait as a weakness.

It really sounds like the verse“Great Alastor Altruist died” is equal to him stating that “there’s no more Mr. Nice Guy” from now on. He’s disconnecting and staying firm to whatever his highly vague motives are. And it’s highly likely that whatever’s holding him back from his full power is the deal he made itself. And he’s going to try anything to get out of it. Maybe that’s the reason why he approached Charlie in the first place.

And I’m going back to Charlie’s deal with him here. The only condition she has is that she won’t harm anyone for him. But knowing Alastor, he’s going to twist the words a bit there. Maybe he won’t harm them physically. But maybe in some other way. Indirectly. One that Charlie won’t see in the long run. Maybe he uses this one favour to help him break free of this deal or loosen it in some way.

And Charlie already has so much trust in him after the battle, she most likely won’t see it coming. It’s perfect.

(Not exactly sure how these soul contracts work buuut, she’s the princess right? Maybe she’s powerful enough to do smth about it? Maybe that’s why Alastor was so interested to gain her trust and potentially free himself?)

…….

But anyway! Onto the second part of my theory!

Alastor’s probably going to optimise his one chance of freedom through Charlie’s owed favour. But I have a feeling he’s not only going to use just Charlie.

Who else is at the hotel that the other main cast members trust? Who he could freely command under his control? To show up at his will? Answer his beck and call? Whose souls that Alastor owns?

I swear. It is NO ACCIDENT that these two were standing side by side. NEXT TO ALASTOR. In the ending. (Or maybe I’m overanalysing, but whatever. This is MY ramble)

When Alastor comes back from the “dead”, everyone was happy to see him. Especially Charlie. And surprisingly Vaggie? I guess she’s warming up to him. Idk if that’s good or not.

Everyone except Lucifer and Husk. Lucifer’s still bitter on the whole ‘dad’ thing. But I just really felt sooo bad for Husk here. 😂 My guy had maybe a few happy hours of what he thought was freedom. Then he sees this guy come back and he’s just: “Ahhhh… SHT-!”

Now I’m just saying, I don’t think Alastor can just casually go up to Charlie and just easily demand that favour. Especially now that Lucifer might be staying around(?) Also, Alastor sounds like someone who would strategically play the long run if it means benefits. Albeit, less truly altruistic than before since that approach almost costed him highly.

He’s maybe going to have to pull some strings to really make Charlie feel like she HAS to do him a favour. To better solidify his chances and so she’s less likely to be hesitant/reluctant/suspicious. After all, Alastor is only owed ONE FAVOUR. Maybe he’ll pull some strings to win over Lucifer’s own trust too so he won’t be stopping Charlie? (I’m not sure, these two are not in good terms.)

(Look me in the eyes and tell me this is the face of someone who’s definitely not going to use this hotel for his own personal gain. Things are going to start getting ugly with Alastor’s new approach. I’m also still like 80% sure these 3 characters are placed together for a reason. It CANNOT be a complete coincidence, right?)

Now I’m really curious how Husk and Niffty would react under this sudden new approach. The angst potential here is smelling strong. It’s obvious that they’re starting to get highly attached to the hotel and really consider the others as friends. Something Alastor didn’t allow himself to.

And it’s not like they have a voice in the matter either. No matter what Alastor tells them to do to secretly manipulate things around the place so he’ll appear like he’s “helping out more.”

Who knows really? What kind of errands he’ll force them to do? “Mr. Nice Guy” is really no longer an option here. That guy is dead. Adam killed him.

And all at the same time, Alastor wouldn’t be breaking Charlie’s condition. He’s not making her hurt anyone at all. Just helping a good old pal, who’s done so much for her, to maybe loosen the constraints his deal has. Or whatever else he wants, I don’t fcking know-

(But Srsly though. The angst??? Niffty and Alastor are fond with each other, but Niffty is also starting to like her new friends too. Will that create some sort of rift? Niffty actually being hesitant??

And don’t even get me STARTED on Huskerdust. Like wtf-? Husk has already stepped out of line before and it left him completely shaken. What else could he do? And a heartbroken Angel finding out he’s behind all this when Husk is the first person to truly reach out to him? Husk not being able to meet his gaze out of guilt?? THE FCK-???)

Yeaaaahhh, can’t wait what Season 2 has for us all….

Remember fellas, this is just a theory. A Hazbin theory! :))

[lynn-tged-posting]

tged webtoon ep 164 spoilers and thoughts that are totally not late what are you talking about this is on time for sure <- writing the day that 165 drops

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JAVIER WAS THE ACTUAL MVP OF THIS WHOLE EPISODE HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA HAHAHAHAH GOD I LOVE HIM SO FUCKING MUCH

THAT SIGNATURE SLIGHT SMIRK, THE MENACE IN HIS EYES. YES!!! SAVE UR MAN FROM GRIEF!!! GO KNIGHT BOY GO!!!!!!!

oh how he's grown, oh how he's learned from lloyd,,, truly using all the skills hes seen and putting them to the test. ITS SO FUNNY HOW EFFECTIVE THIS IS HAHAHAHAA THE EXPRESSIONS ARE SO SO GOOD THEYRE SO UNHINGED I LOVE THIS SO MUCH

back to the top!

lloyd trying to bargain and figure out loopholes only to realize there really is no other way besides losing it all over again makes my heart ACHE. OOOWWW. OWWWWWWWW.

just. watching that shutdown happen is so so so cruel why would u do this to me. the way the artist shows the energy and life just leaving his eyes and then subsequently showing how. tired he is. makes me so so emotional

it fucking HURTS. and by god ive been there before - certainly not to this extent ofc, but ive also been in tough spots where all the work ive done for my engineering projects ends up being,,, pointless. it is VERY real, how demoralizing that feels and lloyds reaction to that, and i cant imagine the scale of how that despair increases when its related to the work you did to simply just live in peace. god. ow. ow ow ow ueueueuuee

like he just essentially got told that it didnt matter how hard he fought to live, to survive, it doesn't matter that he's "lloyd" now; kim suho is destined for an ill-fate. and considering we know him as someone who lives almost entirely for others? it's basically "hey, all this stuff u did for other people to make urself not a burden, became a burden. tough luck!" GOD THATS SO. GHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHH

and he's trying so hard to think of himself as lloyd frontera still but like. whats the point? his association with lloyd frontera became the thing that doomed him

this panel in particular is INSANEE AAGHGHGHHGGG the colors washed out, how limp he looks, the blankness of the background like nothings there. this is where lloyd is right now, hope ripped from him, this reflects that really well. it HURTS.

is dissociated the right word for this? in despair? either way he's emotionally and mentally going THROUGH it, and essentially back to isolation considering how he ignores javier

i also wonder now if lloyd has already made a choice, to let javier live? we dont get to see more of his thoughts beyond this point, so its hard to say whether or not he's already made the decision of which protagonist lives,,, god im so worried for him. a part of me suspects that maybe he already chose javier to live,,, IM SO SCARED,,,,

speaking of javier,,, we see him talking to arcos and marbella!! and AGGGHHH AAAHHH MY HEART i really really think that javier was being completely genuine here. i think he really believes this. javier in general has a tendency to be incredibly genuine in the things he says (examples i cant think of off the top of my head but this episode has a lot of em LOL). he's asserted multiple times that he believes lloyd can save their estate, and its clear he means it every time. the faith javier has in lloyd is so so strong and it makes me so fucking EMOTIONALLL im getting ahead of myself a little bit sorry

but then the stare that arcos gives to javier,,, i think silent was the one who mentioned it but its as if arcos isnt sure if he should believe him, and if u take into account the last time they asked about lloyd's status,,, it's very much possible that he doesnt believe javier, but javier has so much faith in lloyd that he leaves them alone anyway. god,,, gghh,,, mmy heart,,,,

AND JAVIER ASKING LLOYD TO WAIT FOR HIM AND THAT HE'LL HELP LLOYD GET BACK TO HIS FEET GOD GHGHGH HE LOVES HIM SO FUCKING MUCH GOD FUCK GOD DAMMIT YOU!!! YOU!!!!

lloyd doesnt even respond but javier doesnt need to wait for a response bc he'll do whatever it takes now to protect this noble he's come to care for and love and gone on so many adventures with GOD DAMMIT GOD DAMMIT FUCK

and now we reach the second half of the episode and it made me giggle SO FUCKING HARD HAHAHAHAHAHAA

LIKE I SAW THIS PANEL AND MY JAW DROPPED PLEASE JAVIER ALDKJFLSKJDF

ppl were posting that apparently someone in ORV does this too and like thats so fucking funny . if i had a nickel for every time there was identity fraud in a manhwa id have two nickels

POOR RAPHAEL GETTING CAUGHT IN THE FIRE TOO HAHAHAHA HE LOOKS SO NERVOUS

some more panels of javier harnessing all that unhinged lloyd energy IT'S SO SO GOOD. it feels like javier's now a really really strong prosecutor i think he'd do a good job as a lawyer. THIS IS SO SO FUN

LIKE HE LOOKS SO MENACING GOD ITS SO FUNNY AHHAHAHAHA while making entirely good points he's so golden i love u sm javier. yes save ur man. outargue the FUCK out of these angels u clever little knight.

THE BITS WHERE ITS REVEALED HE'S TRULY GENUINE TOO ARE SOOOO FUCKING GOOD

ITS FUNNY ON TOP OF BEING SO REAL OF JAVIER

i talked about it above but like. when javier really truly believes something, when he really truly wants something, it's so fucking obvious. this boy does not lie or pretend about how he feels, point blank period. hell we've seen his behavior when he lies/is not telling the truth; his words are stiff and out of character, and his expression is either menacingly tight or stiffly robotic. he has so, so SO much faith and such a deep desire to save lloyd, and it shows in how he's genuinely fucking thankful that the angels agreed to (or well, were coaxed into agreeing) with what he asked for. i think it's a really interesting character trait and it completely tracks that javier was the protagonist of knight of blood and iron. genuine, emotional characters who love and lose, who have hope and can believe and can also experience despair, can make for an extremely compelling story. javier nails it right on the head

i also think that this character trait completely influenced the way javier used the tactics that lloyd uses. like yes, this is something that lloyd could do, but he also would never be able to pull it off because he doesnt have that same protagonist heart and honest-to-god (pun intended) genuineness that javier has. this inherent authenticity that javier seems to just naturally possess is what allowed him to make these statements and demands, because the sincerity he wears on his sleeve makes it all end up feeling reasonable. only javier could have done something like this, and no one else. i think thats REALLY fun!!!

that is all for this ep for now,,, i am SUPER excited to see where this'll go. hopefully we will hear from alicia abt the eye of summer!!! god javier u clever lil thing im so glad he was able to do this SAVE UR BOYF!!! AAAAHHHH

see y'all next week! aka tmrw! today? whenever 165 drops!

[sailubponbrainrot]

Brat tamer Oab dealing with bratty Wan…….. (nsfw Drabble, minors DNI. CW// degradation, overstimulation, dom/sub dynamics)

A/N: the comment about Wan crying in ep 7 put….. thoughts in my head. Here are said thoughts lmao

Oab has been engrossed while working on a new menu for a few days, brushing Wan off anytime he wants to play because he doesn’t have time (bullshit but Wan put up with it for a solid day before getting annoyed)

When Wan reaches his breaking point he drapes himself across Oab’s back, sliding his hands all over the chefs chest and kissing his neck

Oab shrugs him off and tells wan to let him finish his work, causing the younger man to huff and walk away

Oab doesn’t think much of it, focusing back on the menu he was trying to perfect

Oab continues working before hearing light moans coming from his bedroom

Oab getting pissed because they have an agreement (Wan doesn’t get to get off unless it’s with or with explicit permission from Oab)

Oab stalks to the bedroom and leans against the doorframe, watching as Wan is desperately grinding down with a pillow between his legs, cock red and leaking

Wan opens his eyes and sees Oab standing there but, being the little brat he is, he just continues and whines out that he wants to cum

“Go ahead.” Oab says, shocking wan but he takes the permission at face value and crumbles, dirtying the pillow between his legs with his eyes fixed on Oab

Once he’s come down from his high wan stays still while catching his breath, waiting for what oab would do

Oab stays silent and just walks over to the closet, pulling out a pair of handcuffs wan is very familiar with already

“You need to cum that bad ?” Oab says while walking back over, “you know the rules. Selfish sluts get punished.”

Wan whimpers but puts his hands behind his back, letting oab cuff his wrists

Oab leaves wan straddling the dirty pillow and goes back to the closet to get a small vibrator he can attach to wan’s cock, positioning it right under the head

Oab grabs wan by the chin, forcing him to look up “I’m going to leave you here while I finish my work. Since you needed to cum so bad I’m going to let you. Do you understand, pup ?”

Wan nods but oab just grips his chin tighter. “Words, baby. What’s your color.”

“Green” wan chokes out, somehow already hard again just from the power oab exudes when he’s like this

Oab takes the opportunity to turn the vibrator on, forcing a moan out of the boy in front of him.

Oab releases wans chin and walks out of the room to grab his laptop (causing wan to panic a bit because he thinks oab is actually just gonna leave him there, something they’ve never done before)

Oab walks back in to see wan tearing up and he smirks, sitting in the chair across from the bed and going back to work

Wan relaxes into the pleasure once oab is back in the room, moaning and rocking against the pillow

Wan cums 3 more times and is fully sobbing by the end of it, begging Oab to turn off the vibrator before the man finally shuts his laptop and makes his way over to the bed

“Have you learned your lesson, pup ?” Oab asks, hand coming down to press the vibrator more firmly against wans cock

“Y-yes” wan sobs out, body shaking and hips rutting up into oabs hand

Oab chuckles darkly before bringing his hand down further and begins stroking Wan “one more, baby, you can do it.”

Wan absolutely wails at that, getting pushed over the edge one last time. Said orgasm is right on the sweet spot of painful but still pleasurable

Oab is quick to turn the vibrator off and unlock the cuffs, allowing the boy to crumble into his arms as he rubs his back and whispers praises in his ear

Oab lays them down (chucking the ruined pillow onto the floor and deeming that a problem for the future) and continues comforting wan until he’s calmed down

“Are you okay, baby ?” Oab asks, a little worried he pushed wan too far

“More than okay” wan sighs out, snuggling further into oabs chest, “just…. felt a little neglected.”

Oabs heart breaks at that and he hugs wan tighter. They talk about it after wan takes a shower and spend the night fucking soft and slow, oab making sure wan knows he loves him

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Want to read more ? Here’s my masterlist

[sweetlittlenamjoon]

ZB1 as caregivers! ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡

SFW interaction only please!!!

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

Hanbin 🐹💞

is either fully goofball mode or fully serious leader mode no inbetween

very firm on meal and bed times

will meow at you unprompted

best of both worlds

fr tho the vocal stimming back and forth is very good and very silly

reads you to sleep qwq

acts like he's not fully engrossed in all of your shows

"but wait- the episode is ending? just like that?"

he calls you little one a lot

co-cares with hao

Jiwoong 🐈🦋

sweetest, lovey-dovey boy ever

constantly has you in his lap or holding his hand or snuggling

likes to just ambiently braid your hair

bought a bunch of little clippies to keep your hair out of your face and to decorate

always asking if you ate

(and sneaking you snacks behind hanbin's back)

will let you put stickers on his face if he gets to pick which ones

calls you every petname under the sun, bro whips out the schnookums from time to time

fixes your blankets when you're asleep and gives you a smooch on the forehead

Hao 🦝🎻

he was so nervous at first

really REALLY didn't want to mess up while you're regressed

but he's gotten a lot more comfy

dramatic as,,, we've all seen the baby cloud ep where he pretends he's dying so the babies will pay attention to him

that but everyday

making up for lost time

is always on your side even if you're wrong bc its funny

like,,, sassy aunt energy??

buys you little gifts at the dollar store

colouring together!!

he colours with you to destress uwu

calls you sweetheart and dear and stuff like that

Matthew 🦊🎧

can always tell right away when you're regressed

like he'll just stand up mid sentence and bring you a stuffie and a blanket

has a list of all your stuffies and their names and things you tell him about them

always so giddy when you use a cg title for him

picks you up and spins

especially when youre tired

gotta put those muscles to use somehow

tries very hard to cook for you but isn't very good qwq

is always fighting hanbin tooth and nail to let you go play in the mud

sweetest boy tho fr very huggy

Taerae 🐥🎸

he'd be so awkward at first poor boy T^T

always speaks in full sentences never baby talks

(around the other boys)

(dont tell on him he'll get embarrassed)

lets you play with his smaller model cars

cuts up fruit for you and puts little character picks in them

hair ruffler 100%

calls you dumb nicknames like "buckaroo"

"whatcha got there, buckaroo?"

co-cares with others a lot

mostly just sits near you and keeps you company :)

Ricky 🐱🍓

he's a little stupid /lh /lovingly

so he's been hanging out with you for so long regressed and he just didn't think about it

like you just go baby mode sometimes idk

but when one of the other boys tells him he goes full cutie patootie mode

like literally just watches you do things

cat blinks

always helps out with things even if you fully can do them

"I'll get that! it's too high up for you, sweetheart."

my love, honey, sweetheart

will share his smoothies with you and noone else

he's very pookie is what im saying

Gyuvin 🐶🥭

we've all seen the baby cloud episode, yes?

absolute sweetest boy in the whole universe

also a fruit cutter-upper

him and taerae bicker about who gets to bring you fruit this time

always holds your hand when youre walking

the airplane where they lift you with their feet

baby talk KING

can understand you even at your most regressed

calls you stuff like kiddo and buddy

will slip in the occasional sweet nickname if youre being extra cute tho

Gunwook 🐶🐷

now this is a silly goober!!

loves to play little games with you like peekaboo

points to stuff and asks what colour it is or points to animals and asks what noise they make

little claps when you get it right

he WILL be picking you up and spinning you around

no choice

playdates at the park uwu

pushes you on the swings and waits for you at the bottom of the slide

and then you get popsicles at the store :)

calls you bub or baby

Yujin 🐰⚽️

this is your brother now

if you're older than him he still calls you noona/hyung when you're regressed

he gets nervous qwq

doing your little worksheets next to him doing his homework

plays mario kart with you and even lets you win sometimes

you two are in total kahoots when it comes to annoying the older boys tho

devious little plans

makes pillow forts with you and does not allow anyone without snacks in

watching shows on his phone together

buncha cuties

[softspeirs]

These Heartbeats Clear (4): Rosie Rosenthal x OC

A/N: You mean I was supposed to watch ep 7 and Rosie run towards a recently landed B-17 all heroically and not write something where he helps with the wounded? *laughs maniacally* These Heartbeats Clear Masterlist

four (loss & grief)

Heads tilted upwards, every stood-down pilot, crew member, and civilian on base counts the number of planes coming in.

It's always fewer than they expect.

The 100th is taking so many losses at this point in the war, Rosie is not surprised when two planes barely make the runway. Red-red flares, wounded aboard. Landing gear screeching, holes in wings smoking, and he's moving before he can even think about what he's doing.

The hatch is open and a slew of bullet casings come tumbling out, a crew member not far behind, dazed. Rosie reaches for him out of instinct, gripping his elbow to keep him upright.

"You're all right, son." He says, but the Captain either doesn't hear him, or hasn't processed it. Rosie lets go.

His attention is drawn, as it tends to be, to the arrival of Lieutenant Grace Fleming. Her face is pale, but set in grim determination.

She meets his eyes for a split second. If she’s surprised to see him there, she doesn’t show it, instead she focuses on the man in front of her, fallen to his knees. His breath comes in fits and spurts.

“Captain—“ She barks, eyes flicking up to Rosie’s once more. “A hand.”

It’s not a request. If he’s here, he has to make himself useful. Another nurse on her left, they’re lowering the man to the ground.

“Need him on a litter right away.”

“Count of three.” Rosie confirms, another member of the medical corps arriving at their side with a stretcher.

“Nurse—“ the man stutters, blood seeping from between his chattering teeth. “Miss Grace, please.”

Grace freezes for only a moment, but it’s enough for Rosie to see. Her jaw clenches. “I’m here, you’re alright. Try to slow your breathing for me, okay?” Her hands are gentle as she clasps his. She presses their interlocked hands to the man���s chest, leaning over him. “You’ve got a bad leg wound and some shrapnel elsewhere, we’re going to get you inside and take care of you.”

“Please,” he begs again. “Grace, I don’t want to die.”

Rosie is relieved when Grace looks at him, nodding once. “Count of three.” She says.

One, two, three, and they’re lifting. Into the ambulance the young Lieutenant goes, and Grace is right behind. Rosie helps her in, hands gripping around her waist and hoisting her inside before he can second guess touching her like that.

“Later.” She says to him quietly before shutting the door.

It didn’t need to be said - their sunset meetings on the hard stand have been a staple for the both of them since he came back from the flak house.

He turns back to the chaotic scene behind him, wanting to help. Scenes like this are becoming more and more common. It makes alarm bells ring in his head. Somehow, though, it makes him more sure about his next move.

.

He waits around on the hard stand for a half hour before a feeling in his gut has him turning back towards the barracks.

He goes to the women's hut first. Shaking his head at his sudden nervousness, he raps his knuckles on the door. Entering uninvited seems wrong, and when the door is opened in front of him, he hastily whips off his hat and clutches it between his fingers.

"Captain!" The woman says, and Rosie is embarrassed to admit to himself that he doesn't know her name.

"I'm looking for--"

"Grace?" Word has gotten around, then. "She hasn't been here. Still at the hospital as far as I know. She missed dinner."

Rosie frowns. That's not like her.

Following his gut, he thanks the woman at the door and turns on his heels, heading in the opposite direction. Not for the first time, he wishes he had a jeep or a bike at his disposal - he knows he could find someone to give him a lift, but he doesn't want to draw any more attention to his meeting with Grace than he apparently already has.

The hospital is eerily silent. He forces himself inside - he still hates the smell and the way everything is so blindingly white.

A few men he recognizes from the landing earlier are in bed, most asleep. Their wounds range from what appear to be minor to a man who is bandaged nearly from head to toe.

There is still blood on the floor.

He steps carefully past the last bed. Still no sign of Grace.

Water runs in a small room to his left, and he makes his footfalls a little heavier in hopes that he doesn't startle her if she is indeed still here, preparing to leave for the day.

He peers around the corner to see her, hands deep in the washing basin. She is scrubbing at her hands so hard, she sounds out of breath. A sick, sinking feeling hits him in the gut.

"Grace." He says her name softly. It comes out hoarse. He takes a few steps closer when she doesn't react. "Grace?"

She's still scrubbing at her hands. When he gets close enough, he can see the color of her skin - bright pink, the water so hot steam is rising from the tap. The soap running from her fingers is clean, not a tinge of any color that shouldn't be there running down the drain.

Her hands are shaking.

Without saying anything else, he reaches for the tap and shuts it off. She doesn't stop rubbing at her hands, her knuckles, her fingernails.

"Grace." His voice is firmer this time. His hands settle over hers. He almost pulls away because of how hot her touch is, but the shaking only gets worse in her long fingers, and he grips her tighter out of instinct.

"He didn't make it." She says, voice like he's never heard it before. Flat. Emotionless. "The Lieutenant from--" She stops, and it's not really a cry, but more of a strangled noise that leaves her throat. "His plane was called Borrowed Time."

Rosie's throat is tight as he watches her. He gently guides her away from the sink, hands still tight around hers. "Come on, sit down for a second."

"I can't-- I have to get the blood off."

"Gracie, you're clean, okay?"

"He-- he begged me." She looks at him then. There are tears in her eyes, but he knows her well enough to know she won't let them fall. "He didn't call for his mother, or for God. He begged me."

Rosie throws all caution to the wind. He pulls her sideways so she's half in his lap. His arms go around her, tugging her close, her head finding purchase on his shoulder. Her breathing is strangled, and he knows she's trying not to break.

"You did everything you could." He assures her. "I know you did everything you could."

"You don't know that. Not for sure."

He's shaking his head before she can even finish her sentence. "Yes, I do. There's no one better than you, Grace."

She's quiet for a long time before she pulls away from him. His arms open automatically, and he clears his throat as a sudden awkwardness lands between them like an anvil. "I need to get out of here." She whispers.

"Come on." He says, holding his hand out to her. It feels like an eternity waiting to see if she'll take it.

She does.

.

Lemmons appears at some point to hand over a hastily wrapped parcel of sandwiches and sodas. Rosie looks up at him gratefully, even more grateful when Ken doesn't say anything - he's gotten used to seeing Rosie and Grace out here together.

Grace's face is a mask of stoicism, but Rosie knows better by now. He can see the crease in between her eyebrows that only shows up when she's tired or worried.

He can see the way her shoulders slump downward, her posture normally ramrod straight from years of being shouted at by her parents.

When they're alone again, he watches her carefully for signs that she's knitting herself back together. He doesn't know if his more-than-forward touch in the hospital was wanted, so he doesn't try again, though his fingers itch with the urge to take her hand or pull her close so he can feel her warmth.

"Your twenty-fifth is coming soon." She says suddenly.

He frowns at her. "Why are you thinking about that?"

"You have to go home, Rosie." Her voice trembles.

He takes a step backward. "What? I--"

"Captain Rosenthal, so help me, if you go up there again, you're going to end up in a hospital bed, and if you make me have to tend to you like that, I'll never speak to you again."

His hands go to his hips as he weighs his words. He doesn't want to upset her, he doesn't want to pretend that everything is going to be fine -- hell, he might not make it back at all, let alone without a scratch.

"I can't promise you that."

She stares at him. "You're going to re-up after twenty five." It's not a question.

"The thought has crossed my mind."

She wraps her arms around herself, and he sees it for what it is, shielding herself for what she sees as an unavoidable blow coming her way.

He takes a few steps closer to her, unable to stand the distance any longer. "I'm going to come back." His voice is firm, full of the conviction he feels because he trusts himself, he trusts his men, and because he has something to come back for. He's tired of pretending that's not the case. "I'm going to come back, and I swear I won't have more than minor mending for you to do, all right?"

She looks up at him, the slight widening of her eyes the only indication that he's standing closer than she thought he was. But she doesn't back away.

Her arms fall from around her waist, and reach for him instead. He lets out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding.

Her touch moves from grasping his hand up to his elbow, and then she's tugging him closer, folding him into an embrace. This time it's him who finds a spot for his forehead on her shoulder, inhaling as he feels her grip him tight.

"Thank you." She whispers. Whether it's for the promise of coming back or for pulling her back from the brink today, he wants to tell her that she doesn't need to thank him, that he would be the one to pull her back a hundred times over if it meant he'd get to have these moments with her.

When they pull apart, arms still around each other, he watches the fading sunlight in her eyes and thinks he's never wanted to kiss someone so badly in his entire life.

How he restrains himself, he has no idea.

They walk back to the barracks hand in hand after he stares her down, laughing when she rolls her eyes at him demanding she eat some food in his presence before she goes to sleep.

At the door, he watches her shoulders straighten and hears her take a big, deep breath. He recognizes the motions because he does them too, every time before he hauls himself through the hatch again.

Once more unto the breach.

He's so proud of her. For fighting her way through the hardest day of the war for her so far, for getting up each day and finding a way to be a comforting touch, a healing hand, and a smiling face for these men. He wonders if she has any idea how many lives she's saved, and not just from medicine.

One day he'll have the courage to put into words what she means to him, too.

Today, though, he raises his hand in a farewell as he takes a few steps backward, and laughs under his breath as she blushes just a little.

Her smile plays on a loop over and over again as he falls asleep that night.

[kanmom51]

JK Live 4 October 2023

21:01 or 9:01 pm KST

cr./To all the creators of the media used in this post.

I was waiting for this, and kind of expecting this to happen, lol.

He said he'd be live at 9 pm. And yes, you can say, it's unintentional, a coincidence, but I say NO.

Both JK and JM have shown us over the years their attention to the numbers, the dates.

Starting the live at 9:01 was intentional.

9/1 or 1/9, however you look at it!!

Let's talk about the live, why don't we?

It was definitley an interesting one.

In a gist, JK shut down (well tried to) the whole Mingyu shipping shit. He most definitley shut down TKKs. I actually kinda, maybe (not really), felt sorry for them.

He listened to all the members songs, with certain degrees of favouritism and certain degrees of, well, not...

He drank. Like a lot. I think maybe someone needs to fill him in on the secret that alcohol does have calories. Yes, whiskey might not be as bad as beer on that front, but drinking as much and then not eating cause he's dieting... well, not the healthiest choice. And this is not, god forbid, me mothering or smothering him. His health is important for his performance (he says that himself), not to mention, man is constantly hungry. Eat more, is what I'm saying.

He once again demonstrated his neuro-divergency (that whole clean up session he had in the kitchen, lol).

He showed us, again that's it's all about choices.

He got pensive and serious at a point and said some very important things, which I will, of course, discuss here in my post.

He is super tired, but really struggling to sleep.

He is fighting so hard to drop the cute image, but man, it's just imbedded in him. He is so cute!!!

And he is so genuine.

He is genuine.

Let us begin our journey into JK's almost 1.5 hour live (yep, we are back to those, lol).

He starts out telling us he just got home from the company, and that he hasn't even prepared his glass (of drink) - kind of solidifies my belief that the 9:01 pm starting time was meaningful and intentional, because then he goes and prepares his glass and drink.

He invited us to have drinks with him, so as he's preparing his own drink he tells us to fill up our glasses as well, lol. Throughout the live he has 3 highballs, and by the end of the live admits he's kind of drunk. Which is not that surprising given he is drinking on an empty stomach (as high as his tolerance to alcohol may be).

He explains he came on Weverse on the 4th and not earlier because of his solo album announcement. Golden. Makes a toast with us to celebrate it. And he talks a little about it as well.

He tells us how Golden represented him after debut. We know him as the Golden maknae, he mentions I think GC (which for some reason they translate as golden chest and not golden closet, maybe because whoever is translating isn't aware of golden closet, who knows...), how he wrote a poem called Golden (the one JM went all gushy about, if you recall), And also "this moment is like a golden period for me." - Golden hour perhaps? Kind of fits with his choice of lighting for the live as well. Just saying.

And there you have it!!!

And after seeing this, go back and take another look at his concept photo...

The album includes 3D and the clean and explicit versions of Seven. 11 songs on it, which means we will get to hear 8 new songs!!!

He also explains how he thought he would release an ep and somehow it became a full album.

He didn't give too much info (well, he couldn't of course), but told us the title track has a performance and he's practicing, like A LOT. He wants to do well and is giving it his best. He also lets us know that the title song is a hard one and will be awesome!! I do hope this one is not a collab though (just my own wishes here). He is confident we will like it, and says we can look forward to it. I know I am.

He's complaining about how his body isn't the same, he's exhausted. Well JK my man, you wanted to be a adult, and us adults, we grow old too, lol...

He says "there is nothing that is making me stressed out, I am just tired." Now, that could be meant about the album being released, or the performance he's preparing for. But it could also be more...

He says he's keeping his voice down and wanted to be calm and have "older bro vibe", lol.

He wants to go with older bro vibe. Appear to be more mature? Since his full album is coming out?

Ok, so I'm going to say this here. The translation is somewhat off and wacky. I felt this with JM's live on 1st September with some of it, and I feel the same here as well. The whole golden chest thing, the "I'm keeping the weight down" when he's talking about the older bro vibe, and more... It feels like a. whoever is doing this doesn't know JK too much (the golden chest is a big clue), and b. are they just translating literally and not the actual sentence meaning?

JK shares with us how tired he is, how he's still having trouble sleeping, that he practiced real hard today and that his upcoming schedule is hellish. I can only imagine. He's really worried, "will I be good at this?"

Now, let's stop here for a second shall we? Didn't he just minutes before tell us he's not stressed out? So, perhaps that wasn't about the album and promotions at all? Perhaps that was more about the white noise shitshow that was going on in the background? Telling us that isn't bothering him, all while now sharing with us that what he is worried about is if he'll be good enough, do well enough with his performances?

He shows us he got an IV today, needs to replenish himself, yet he hasn't eaten. "I have to take care of my body too". Yes he does. But at the same time he says he has to lose weight. It kind of frustrates me, but then again, this is their reality, as idols. I just wish there would be less pressure on them in that aspect.

He reads a comment telling him to do well, says he will.

And then this:

Ok, so thing is, please raise your hand if you actually do believe the commenter was asking JK if he loves Taehyun of TXT.

No show of hands I see.

Lmao.

Nah, when this happened I didn't have the comments on and in any case wouldn't have been able to read them, not knowing Korean. But I kind of felt like maybe whoever wrote it wasn't Karmy and misspelled it perhaps? And then I saw this.

So here's the thing. If this was a misspell, makes sense that JK was maybe blissfully unaware of the intent of the comment.

But if this was indeed spelled out correctly, I kind of have my doubts he didn't read it right, especially given he says it twice before answering. And he's off telling us about TXT Taehyun. Whom he spoke with on the phone that day. He's so well mannered and cute, while being an old soul. Ok, here we go with another Taekook ship, lol. JK spoke to someone - must be something going on there. No wonder the man is so damn tired... Seven days a week seven sets of sheets... (eww... NOOOOOOO). No, but seriously, did we know that Taehyun was a good friend of JK's? No we didn't. Now we do.

Not seeing it doesn't mean it's not there!!!

It's funny how JK runs himself down constantly. Like the man is so intelligent. Perhaps not book smart (which is why he keeps saying he's not smart), but not everything about life is learnt from a book, and his emotional intelligence and artistic intelligence are next level. But he keeps running himself down, and I kind of feel that sometimes fans only hear or see that of him, instead of seeing his art and listen to what actually comes out of his mouth when he starts speaking about the deeper things.

Again, the "I'm Jungkook's girlfriend" comments. Ugh yuck. Like shut the fuck up already. But he just brushes it off. Reads it, asks what they are doing at this hour and snickers.

Comment "I really love you a lot". JK "I think I love you more". This is once again JK cementing just how great his love for army is. He will talk about it more later too.

Look, man loves army. We can't even start to understand the connection he has with army, given his whole career, starting out at such an early age and going through all the struggles that they went through to get where they are right now, feeling that it's because this sense of loyalty and love that army have for them. So yes, he loves army.

And another idiot in the comments asking JK to take off his shirt. Of course these people are flooding his comments. Funny how his reaction is:

Yes he giggles, but he's uncomfortable. And asks why they even said that. "It's embarrassing".

Happy that he called them out. As if it will help though.

JK shows us his Vogue magazine, the hip hop concept, which he says he liked the most.

Ok, so this was maybe intentional (I kinda feel it was), maybe not, but cute none the less.

He talks about how the comments are lagging, slow, and says:

and then he thinks for a second, eyes looking to the side (mind working), and goes:

Kind of random, don't you think?

Coming up with the 13 seconds lagging.

And happening to end up with 10-13. 🤣🤣

So, he started the live at 9-1 and now we have 10-13!!!

I'd say, either this was intentional (him stopping to think might just hint to that) or the man has 13 etched on his brain. 13 and 10, which is kind of coming up very soon...

Next JK talks about the TikTok he deleted.

Now here's the thing. On Stationhead JK said he saw the trend and wanted to do it. Not a word about doing the opposite of the trend. Going "the other way". JK isn't saying he didn't want us to see the clip he uploaded (which kind of might have been what was understood from what he said in Stationhead, and maybe that's why he's clarifying here). He says he wanted his TikTok to be for dancing and that's why he deleted. He also seems to be happy that army had seen it and spread it around regardless of him deleting. So, he wanted us to see it, but better it not be on his TikTok. And the thing is that he posted it to start with. He knew that army will catch it and spread it. He knew!!! And he wanted us to. I don't know how to articulate this properly to make my point clearly, but the whole thing screams Queer coding to me. I talked about it in a previous post, and I stand by my words.

This wasn't about doing something silly and then regretting and deleting. This was about posting something with a message, and then deleting because it couldn't stay up on his account ("as long as it's not on my tiktok"), but relying on army to catch it and spread it around.

"Let's talk in English", reading out a comment...

The Nah, though, lol.

"English is so difficult", he says in English, lol.

Talks about how the comments are slow and the responses in Stationhead were immediate, and then, out of nowhere he's going...

Puiriri...

Well, he actually does this during Like crazy as well.

Nope, not JM on the brain what so ever...

"Korean is sexy"...him going with that's right, Korean is the hardest language... He actually talks about how the translations from English to Korean differ from translator to translator and how interesting that is. True about the opposite way as well, seeing the difference in the structures of both languages.

"You want to see me laugh?"

Funny, the original translations were "smile if you're real". Either way, he's hilarious.

I can't with him. LMAO.

Prepares drink no. 2.

Again, this man doesn't want to be called cute, but he's so damn cute, lol. Like how can you be preparing this alcoholic drink and still be so cute about it? Lol.

No tequila or champagne for JK.

"You want to have a drink with me?"

JK: You already all know it.

Why does it feel like JK is talking about so much more than just knowing his address is up on YT?

"You want me to call out my address? But you really can't visit me." Boundaries set once again. With a smile. But set none the less.

Plays a song he tells us he was recommended by one of the dancers while filming 3D MV. 21 by Gracie Abrams.

Says we'll be like this today "let's rest". How you can call what he does later as rest I have no idea, lol.

He shows us where he shot the TikTok clips, the corridor. Shows and explains a little how he does it.

Does a little clean up sesh in the kitchen. The way he was rearranging the bottles and utensils, while on live, was that intentional? Was it just his neuro divergency, getting distracted perhaps? Idk.

Asked if he ate, asks "what will I eat?" in English and tries to say something else or thinks maybe he didn't say it properly initially, but gives up, lol.

Then someone askes to hear Hobi's song. And JK is happy to go put on Jhope's song, saying he misses him. 😭

Says "Arson", twice, but then plays "More", lol.

Ok, so this is where we start with listening to the members songs, and I do have something to say about this.

JK plays 2 of Hobi's songs, and puts on a show.

If this is JK resting... Lol.

Sure he's tired...

After Hobi, JK plays Tae's Slow dancing.

Then stops the song, sits down saying how tiring have to rest and then says "Let's go with all the major songs for the members".

And guess who's next... one guess allowed... Of course you know the answer to that.

He has Like crazy playing twice in a row and then SMF pt. 2. He really LOVES SMF pt. 2. You can tell it means A LOT to him. Not that LC doesn't, but I feel that emotionally LC is harder for him, while SMF pt. 2 is cathartic (for JM and as such so meaningful to him as well).

He's all playful with LC.

We have this as well...

And at some point wants to do something, walks off camera looking for a prop, I guess, only to come back deciding it's a no go - won't be fun (me sitting here dying to know what he was up to).

The whole bottle empty during LC.

He moves on to Jin, 1 and a half songs, RM (3 songs) and Suga (2 songs).

Point being, the only member that gets only 1 song played is Tae. Ouch. The only member to have the same song played twice - JM.

So, let's talk a second about the whole Like crazy playing twice. Cause Idk if you get it. He listens to Hobi and then Tae's Slow dancing, then says "we have to listen to all the members", cause he ain't falling into the TKK trap, and he plays JM. Cause, of course it would be JM. But here's the thing. Each one of them was on a specific playlist. When he played a song it continued to the next song in line. Hobi he said Arson, but actually played More (which was interesting within itself), and then it went to On the streets. RM same, went down through his album, Suga the same. But not JM. He played Like crazy, and then following it, him not moving from his chair or changing the songs or going to play it again, it played it again. Same version. In the album Like crazy is followed by SMF pt. 2 (which did follow the second time LC played, and he did listen through that too). So my question is what kind of playlist JK has for JM? Does he just have these songs going on repeat? He gets up to stop it just at the end of SMF pt. 2, and I can't help but wonder what the next song would have been? SMF pt. 2 again maybe?

Of course he still remembers the choreo.

He talks about Jin and Super Tuna, how he's wild and that side of him is why the team is so bright. He really loves him so, and misses him.

"I miss my members".

Prepares drink no. 3.

The whole ceremony around the drink preparations... he's so funny.

He makes a comment about Jin's MV while looking towards where his whole music playing set up is. So, this is YT he's playing from? Which means these would be YT playlists? Which means he watches LC on repeat? I mean, who could blame him really?

Gets up to change the playlist to RM's songs.

While Flowerworks is playing he reads a comment and says:

"Did Mingyu cut his hair?"

Now, we know they saw each other later that night, getting together with others as well, but JK once again draws the lines here. He's a good friend definitley. Someone he hangs out with, of course. But knowing if he cut his hair... meaning being in constant contact with him or more than that, as there are some that might think... nope.

Ok, time to get serious.

He starts to talk about the members songs, their "colours are so different", and then he's asked after resuming activities in 2025 what he wants all the members to do together? Turns down the music a bit to get serious:

Make an album, quickly come out to see army, first priority of course. From the moment they get back together to find the way to come out as quickly as possible. "We will do Bon voyage...we will do In the soop..."

Stops, gets up to turn down the volume even more, and this is when you know he's delving even deeper, and getting even more serious. Sits down and continues...

Ok, I'm really not sure this is about the solo activities. He talks about that further on. I thought this when I first heard this during the live, and although the wording is slightly different I still think this is JK is sending us a message. They love us, they love each other. They will be coming back and they will be giving it their all. But that said, they will also have their own personal lives. Setting the stage, perhaps? For relationship announcements? Marriages on the way? He told us that he wants to make us happy, but to do so we have to understand that he deserves happiness as well. Is this one step further in that direction? yes their focus is on army, but with all of that they will also have their own personal paths.

He continues about them wanting to "look awesome" in front of us, or want to give us strength,

He knows what his top priority is, and he hopes we know that we are the reason. For real.

He continues to talk about coming back in 2025, releasing a song, saying it will be approx. 2 years.

They mustn't forget there are those rooting for BTS. Train, release an album, tour.

They will have to meet army around the world.

This is interesting:

They will reveal by doing shootings and "let your ears get pleased and let you watch our shows". Stories

"BTS is this kind of team". That is what they will show.

And what members each want to do, they can do that later. Him making clear that their first priority is the comeback as BTS.

Number one priority is about the group, and he makes sure we understand that this is not only him speaking but also true for every single one of them.

Again, army's importance to him. This isn't acting or being false or fake, this is genuinely what he feels. When said in a comment that army are because of BTS he corrects them, sets things straight: BTS are here because of army!!

And then this happens:

"Jeon Jimin?" he reads out a comment.

Now, I understand people think it's disrespectful because of the meaning it has in the West but the fact that in Korea people don't change their names after marriage. Thing is, Karmy nor JK, for that matter, really find it offensive? He doesn't even take it that way. To him it's someone putting their two names together, I'd say just like Jikook or minkook or kookmin. Nothing more nothing less. And he chooses to read it out. He could have just left it, but he decided to read the comment out.

This is when he remembers he has to play Suga's songs too, lol. Playing Haegeum.

"How can all the member have such different tastes in music? Isn't that fascinating?"

I love it that he feels that way. I love it that he knows how talented he is (especially knowing how he runs himself down intellectually). I love that he knows and appreciates the rest of the members talent as well. They are all different, and yet all outstanding each in their own way.

And not only does he see that in them, he also attributes his own growth as a person to them.

JK tells us how Yoongi told him off for not doing the Haegeum dance challenge, repeats it a couple of times too, how he was upset about it, lol. So he says he will do it. A little late, no? And he makes sure to make it clear that it won't be soon either. But it will go up on his TikTok.

Toilet break time.

Comes back, finishes up his drink and stops Amygdala to play Seven and 3D before he ends his live.

So, he chooses the explicit version of Seven. Sings along. Admits he's a little drunk and for now will stop drinking. Emphasis on "for now", lol.

Now, while he's playing Seven someone asks for him to play Slow dancing.

Once is enough, thank you very much!! Lmao. He just keeps shutting them down. It's also the way he says it, the intonation. Sound annoyed, lol.

Says he'll play 3D and say his goodbyes, which he does. Sings along to 3D as well, ad-libbing at the end, kind of wondering if this is something we will be getting in his live performances. It does feel like he chooses to sing certain lyrics while not others, in both Seven and 3D.

Then he says his goodbyes, to look forward to the album, to know that he is always thinking of us, to have a wonderful night and day and thanks us again .

So that's it. JK's live. Missed these lives of his, as exhausting as writing these posts are, lol. This is Jungkook. Cute and funny and serious and sincere.