#is it long? no. is it good? no. am i proud of it? ...maybe a little shush
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
I loved the update just because it exists. I loved the bit with the mounts (especially Arthur's trying to ground MC) but my tiny bit of concrit is the "I know you're a mage" convo feels...shoehorned? Like we get the panic attack and Arthur just says he doesn't think the same way as Uther and it's just...It feels (imo) that the Hound once more just accepts Arthur at face value again? I loved the rewrite making the Hound more wary of Arthur, and this kinda felt like a slip? Idk it just feels like there could be...more there. Or perhaps Arthur will try to revisit the topic? Cause like idk about you but if I was just told "I don't want to do anything to you buuuuuut people in my court might," I'd feel threatened and like...I wouldn't believe a single word prior to the "my court might" part. Cause like the Hound is a political prisoner, the nobles (Our sister in law is amazing) made that clear, so it's just another chain Arthur is adding, a little "Be careful love, you don't know what SOMEONE might do if they found out you're a mage :) :)", you know?
And as someone who played as a Hound who is absolutely dreading this marriage (they literally feel like a prisoner) that whole thing kinda felt as if that wasn't an option? Like for example, the walking into the church thingy you have: I feel better, I'm not alone, and the "I am strong and proud" options, but no real option for...just numb? I personally just headcanoned the Hound was disassociated to the point they won't remember the day at all. (I kinda hope we might just get to breakdown with our brothers, or idk alone in the dark)
Also I forget, but is this a game where we have to rack up romance points to lock in? Or one we choose the route? Because I honestly didn't feel that my Hound would want to talk to anyone during what is (to them) a celebration of their collaring/house's defeat.
BUUUUT I truly do hope you take this as constructive. You won't please all of us, and you shouldn't try to. I love that you gave us even this and you are incredibly strong and lovely for pushing through everything. If I am out of line, feel free to ignore or tell me off and I'll just smash my Hound into a better mold for the story lol. After all, it is your story, tell it how you want.
I would really like to give you a long response to your very helpful feedback, but I fear I am lacking the energy to do so. I just want you to know that I hear you, and in truth you make really good points.
1) yeah I do admit I was getting close to burnout with writing in this update, and that scene in particular might have suffered for it. I'll revise it, and hopefully try to not make the interaction feel so jarring. (Note: did you try to pick the more... aggressive option? It goes in a different way, maybe it is less weird?)
2) you are totally right on the options for the marriage - especially because you can play a very numb MC. I'll either edit or add that option. Ohh and the breakdown with the siblings is peak idea. I'm writing that down.
3) as for the romance points: this game is focused strongly on MC. You can choose the pace of the relationship your Hound develops, and for romance, you need to first have some platonic points with said RO. Platonic means in this case that MC wants to spend time with them, and doesn't have to go further than what will become a lifelong friendship.
You do have to pick at least an option to have platonic points with a RO, but you won't get locked out of anything in this game. Every choice shapes your personal Hound's story, this is not a game that punishes you, or that is focused solely on romance.
Thank you for sending this in! This kind of feedback, especially if worded clearly and kindly lik you did, can be so helpful and I love getting it even if it makes me pause and rethink some things.
65 notes
·
View notes
Text
Beyond Business-part three//t.c.
“Are you all ready for the Palm Springs Awards tonight?” you asked Timmy when you arrived at work, his house, the next day.
“Yeah, I guess.” he said. He looked tired, he rubbed his eyes with his hands, “I think I will take your speech with me. It will be a good script to ground myself with when I accept the award.”
“Alright. So I guess it’s good enough for you to use if you win the Golden Globe, and then we can work on a new variation for the Oscars.”
“Yes, yes, but I doubt I will need it. Those awards always favor older actors. Not that I can blame them, I am not as experienced.”
“Timmy you should be proud of your work. The awards are just a bonus for some people. It’s not a necessity to know you’ve done a great job.”
“I am proud.” he smiled then shrugged, “Maybe one day I will stop caring so much about the awards. You’re a great writer by the way. I think I’ll have you do all of my speeches with me from now on.” he grinned softly at you.
“Well, thank you. I’m glad to help, boss.” you set your purse down on the counter, "Emails today?"
You heard his phone buzz, he looked at it, then answered you, "Yeah, it'll be a short day for you today. I'll be leaving this afternoon for the ceremony."
"Okay, um, do you need me to do anything for tonight? I could come with you, if need be."
He shook his head, "No, no, I don't think that will be necessary."
You nodded as he answered a text on his phone, "Is she going?"
"Who?" he responded without looking up, totally aloof.
You sighed, "Timmy, I'm not a reporter, you don't have to play dumb with me. You know who I'm talking about."
"Yeah, I think she is going." he grumbled.
"So, should I expect a drunken phone call at two in the morning this time?" you quipped.
He looked up, stared at you, like he was trying to communicate something, even if he didn't know what it was. "I've got a phone call." he said plainly, avoiding answering, before turning away and going into the other room.
You rolled your eyes, mumbling to him, but really to yourself, "I guess I will take that as a yes. Your phone wasn't even ringing."
..........
The workday went smoothly, but the closer it got to your early dismissal, the more Timmy become agitated. He grew grumpier throughout the day, not necessarily at you, just in general. You began to wonder if he was getting enough sleep, or maybe it was just stress, or maybe it was Miss Jenner.
"Are you sure you're okay? For tonight, I mean?" you were concerned about him on a personal level, but couldn't let it show too much, so you sheathed it with the mention of the awards ceremony.
“Yeah,” he spoke softly, walking you out of his home, “I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me.”
It seemed to be a new routine for him to escort you out at the end of the work day. It was growing on you. It made you feel cared for.
“Okay, well, good luck. You’ll do great. I’ll see you tomorrow.” For some reason, you felt the urge to kiss him on the cheek, like returning the favor from the day before. But you held back, yeah it’s a good idea to hold back.
"Thank you. See you tomorrow." he gave you that signature Timmy grin.
As you headed home, you could not get the image of his face out of your mind. You didn't care for the mustache and short hair combination at first, but the look had really grown on you recently. His hair had become looser and tousled on top, and he had grown a goatee to go with the mustache, which you think brought the facial hair look together nicely. It began to suit him in a mature way, and there was something really cute and sweet about it.
But, you knew that you could not think of him like that for too long. He was your boss, and he belonged to someone else.
That evening, you wondered if you would hear from Timmy after the awards were over. You hoped that you wouldn't, and that he would be okay. Maybe he wouldn't drink, or maybe he would just have a couple and then go home. Maybe he wouldn't need you.
However, your phone rang in the middle of the night, waking you up. You peeled your eyelids open with a groan, grabbing your phone and seeing the time, 1:47 A.M. Sure enough, it was your boss calling.
Your cleared your throat as best and as quickly as you could, hitting the green answer button, "Yes, Timmy?"
"Hey, open your door would ya?"
"What?" you sat up instinctually, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.
"Can you open your door?" he asked louder, with more emphasis on each word.
"Okay! Jeez, sorry. I'm coming." you threw your covers off, scooted your feet across the floor to find your slippers. "I was asleep you know." you sassed into the phone at him.
"Oh, shit. I guess it's early isn't it?" you could just picture him squinting at his phone, seeing what time it was.
"Try 'early,' goodbye." you said, ending the call and scampering out of your bedroom.
.........
You opened the front door of your apartment, and there he was, waiting.
"Timmy. What are you doing here?"
"Just stopping by." he shrugged nonchalantly.
"How did you know where I lived?"
"Your job application." he said in an obvious tone.
You blinked in disbelief, “I gave that to you more than a year ago."
"Yeah, well, I have my assistant's address memorized, okay? You never know when I might need you." he insisted.
You sighed, "I guess. Please tell me you didn't drive here." You leaned outside, peeking around to see if his car was there.
"No, I took an Uber from the event." he placed his hand on the door frame next to you.
“Are you okay? Why didn’t you go home with Kylie? Or just go to your place?” you asked.
He frowned, looking down at the ground, he shook his head at your interrogation. “I don’t know.” he looked up at you, standing straight up, he took a step forward.
The close proximity between you and him felt dangerous.
He was a bit taller than you, so he leaned down close, and softly, he said, “Why can’t I stay away from you?”
You felt weak, like you could fall right to the floor. But if you did, you didn’t know if Timmy was stable enough to help you back up.
Luckily, you didn’t have to respond in any way, because he said, “Do you have a couch or something I can crash on?”
January 10, 2025
@gatoenlaciudad @thebetawolfgirl @musicandbooksaremyhappyplace @softhecreator @tchalamss @lixzey @bitchyunknownuser @ducktapebar @aoi-targaryen @yukideadinside @elloise0 @thatoneweirdgirl17 @mel-vaz @sammy-halpert @iwishchalamet @that-one-fangirl69 @jindongdongie @briefkittenearthquake @imnotoverlyobsessive
#timothée chalamet#timmy chalamet#timothée imagine#timothee x reader#timothee chalamet#timothee fanfic#timothée chalamet fanfic#personal assistant#slow burn#friends to lovers
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
FORGETTABLE-AU (Page 61-64)
* I-I don't think we were talking about the same thing...
[BEGINNING] [PREVIOUS] [CONTINUE]
#FINALLY FINISHED THIS WOHOO#Okay so#I have been keeping this small part of info secret for SOOOO long and it was so funny that JUST this week I got a ton of asks about#Wingdings' voice and I was SO tempted to talk about this little detail#BTW I DIDN'T FULLY MAKE THIS UP#i mean#Yeah I did#BUT IT IS BASED ON SOMETHING I NOTICED!!!!!!#When redacted talks in Wingdings the sound is clean#but when we listen to entry 17 (which is most likely a recording)#There's a VERY loud overlay of garbage noise#And so I was like#I could use this.........#like yeah a sound based on symbols?? we can't understand it! but our brains might do the work for us and maybe try to understand it?#but recording it goes very bad.....#I thought it was fun so I made it a hc for Gaster#and then I applied it here :D#lol#I think the pacing of this one is also a bit too fast but ehh#I hope it's clear#I am so proud of how I drew Alphys in these pages I feel like I am finally understanding her shape and how I want to stylize her#Sans is very good at reading people#He can tell when people are lying#that's why Wingdings didn't lie! he just conveniently forgot to tell him some details about what they found#okay yeah that's enough#TIME FOR THE TAGS#undertale#forgettable-au#forgettable-au-comic#sans
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
Her job
is...
Beach?
and kissing women
kenjoy
#the presentation of this could be better#but unfortunately tumblr sucks when it comes to posting art#tbh all social media sucks with posting art#anyways i hope you enjoy#one day i will maybe think of a way of doing good looking backgrounds#but it is what it is#these took awful long but i am so proud of these because like??? look??#my art#barbie#barbie 2023#barbie x gloria#barbie movie#Barbie brainrot
693 notes
·
View notes
Text
time to pretend
#first off i want to say i am endlessly proud of charles' drive today in monaco#he deserves every last good thing that comes to him#this is like a little party post for him ! hope he jams out tonight and maybe this song will play#secondly. i have been gone a very long time lmfao.. my bad.. finals week will kill u if you arent careful#also i spend way more time writing fic than making these graphics anymore i love writing my boys#lestappen#max verstappen#charles leclerc#web weaving#this looks a little wonky and ugly but its ok :)
157 notes
·
View notes
Text
I finished! Ha, it's nice to see the end result of the last four days of hard work, especially since I wasn't sure if it would turn out well or not. But! Not only did it turn out so, so nice (IMHO), but it turned out so much better than I ever expected!
For those who couldn't tell, I decided to customize a Funko Pop into Ciri, from The Witcher (based on her design from The Witcher 3 game), using a House of Dragon Daemon whatever his last name Funko I saw at Walmart. It was a little tricky to change the design over, and I made a few mistakes that I had to roll with (for example, her sword is purposely broken since I had originally tried to make it longer, it broke accidentally, I couldn't get the dried milliput I used off, so I decided that instead of sanding it, I would embrace it and make it purposely broken, ha), but overall, I'm happy with how it turned out!
Let me know what you think! This is the... fifth? Funko I've customized, and I think that I'm getting better at it, ha. ^-^ I've never been the best at sculpting, especially small things, but I'm getting there. The braid almost did me in, but I think it turned out really nice in the end. ^-^
#Ciri#Ciri of Cintra#cirilla fiona elen riannon#witcher ciri#The witcher#the witcher 3#funko pop#Funko#funko custom#My art#Ooof#Dang am I proud of how this turned out#Honestly it didn't take as long as I'd have thought#I started on Wednesday I think?#Yeah on New Years Day#And I finished tonight#Not too bad#I worked maybe 2-3 hours at most a day so...#About 7-8 hours? At most?#I originally wasn't going to give her a base but the braid made her very top heavy and she kept falling over so she needed a base ha#I also gave her her extra sword. I'm glad it fit on her back#I wasn't sure if it would or if I'd have to have it as an accessory by her feet#OH. And I did actually make her her own mini Wolf medallion and you can kinda see it but uh... it doesn't look very good ha#Like I said I'm not the best sculptor in the world and mini things are the bane of my existence in general#The fact I made it look like anything is a miracle#Oh also I'm only blazing this since I get a free blaze a month and I might as well you know?#Anyway if you're still reading these tags you're amazing and I love you. :-)
31 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ef's moment of respite at the bottom of the Mariana Trench from amazing story Falling Falling Stars by @not-poignant
#new#my art#I planned a lot of things#but now I am kinda numb emotionally#cause sister's nearly divorce crises and her husband being my best coworker#and me not managing my talks in my head lol#soooo I don't think I will draw anything for a long time#rip plans but life always happens#and maybe it a good thing#anyways#oh how I enjoyed drawing this one!#I've never drew anything bigger than like 2k pixels#and this one was meant to be printed on A3+#and the first time I did the right size for it I was like WHAT? DO? YOU? MEAN?#when I am at 100% it's only one rock at my whole screen#but then I figured out that like... I can draw details ten times moooooore#spending 8hours on one roooock!!!#MORE SPACE#and I dont know shit about proffesional stuff with exposition and placement and shadows and colours#so details everywhere as I go#and I love to think that the portal to the lake with antlers bars is portal to Augus' lake#and I wanted water snails and knitted jelly fish and kinda blanket but water themed so it's a big algue piece#and it just piled up#and the colours feel was the most relaxing thing to look at all the time#yeah#really proud of this one
63 notes
·
View notes
Text
[ID: A digital drawing done in pink pencil of Galadriel and Orion from The Scholomance book series. They’re cuddling, and Orion has his arms and one leg wrapped around El, the other dangling next to her legs. Orion has his eyes closed and is grinning. He wears a hoodie and baggy cargo pants, and his socks are falling off at the toes. El has an arm wrapped around Orion, and she looks down at him in a subdued loving way, with a slight smile. She’s wearing a t-shirt and baggy sweatpants. A flurry of hearts is above Orion’s head, and a single heart in a word bubble is next to El’s head. /end ID]
I just really like cuddles :3
#grim draws#is the id too long? new to this and I tend to over explain things#I can shorten it I just wanted to point out orions cute loose socks#ALSOOOOO UGH THEYRE SO STINKIN ADORABLE I WANT TO CHEW THEM UP#finished the series earlier today and they’re officially my pookies. I am becoming a ya girlie(dismay. despair. also not true)#anyway tags. hi#the scholomance#a deadly education#the last graduate#the golden enclaves#galadriel higgins#orion fuck what’s his last name#help#orion lake#how did I forget such a simple last name that’s so embarrassing#anyway. proud of this actually they look so cutie#orion to me is short and scrawny strong and has brown hair and I refuse to change my mental image. sorry he’s too good#if you wanted me to picture him right maybe you should have described him before 2/3 of the way into the second book. consider#and if she did. sorry i wasn’t paying attention i was too busy looking at how cute my orion is
53 notes
·
View notes
Text
...
#ugh. fuck me im so tired. im getting sucked back into that workaholic mindset and now my body hurts and my nerves are fying. but it feels#good to b productive. if only i didnt have to teach and could just work with data :-(#anyway. the last 2 weeks have been good in that i feel like im actually hitting my stride a bit#bc we're seeing cool things in our genomes and its gonna b really fun to explore. and i met with the terrifying#prof who is on my committee to pitch a project for a final in her class and it seems it went over well. it was kinda funny bc we were#meeting and she was like: so how would u tell which gene was lost 1st? the phytochrome or the genes that r triggered by activation? and i#was like: uhhhhh idk. and then my advisor walked by and she grabbed him and asked him the same question and he was like: idk we'll have to#figure it out. which made me feel way better abt not knowing lol. then my superior lab mate asked me a question abt taking confocal images#and i was actually able to figure out what her issue was. and my old advisor was asking me if i knew anyone to ask for using a pam on cyanos#and i was like: here is what i think my advisor would say and linked her a paper. then i asked my advisor and he said what i expected and#linked the paper that id already sent. so im like. ok. ok. maybe i actually sometimes do kno what im doing. sorta.#and then my old advisor said she was so proud of me. and i was like aw. its so funny bc my relationship is so different with my new advisor#hes great but its all very professional. with my old advisor i would text her after hours bc she was a workaholic like me and went on long#car rides and handed out Halloween candy with her. she was more hands on and doesnt have kids so work is her life. its just interesting#so things have been going well. but there arent enough hours in the day. and my committee meeting is in like 16 days. and i am afraid for#that but not as afraid as i was in april when i had a full on breakdown and canceled it the day before it was set to happen lol#itll b fine. i just have to work thru the weekend so i can get my preproposal done. and prey that the fucking splitstree download site will#start working bc i want to do gene networks dammit#unrelated
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
Hdhhrhdhhs-- I actually like the way these came out wth--
So I might as well show you guys because the first image was probably the most cleanest I've drawn clothing--
Hdhfnnfnnddbfbdbdddgdhdhdh--
And the freaking face bdhdhs-- i think i might start doing his face like that idk
#can you tell how proud i am actually??😭#I've never felt this good about a drawing since forever and it had to be in a doodle😭😭😭#who knows-- maybe if i see it more I'll start to hate it again ndbdhhdhdh#cus that happens sometimes#art#doodle#one piece#monkey d. luffy#gear 5#gear 4#gear 5 luffy#gear 4 luffy#♧♠︎my art♠︎♧#also also-- long-hair luffy go brrrrr
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
thinking about the person i could have been if i tried a little harder to find my own way
#probably the thing i am resenting my parents for right now is how good they were at convincing me#not to pursue any career paths other than the ones they laid out#every time i was like hey this seems interesting should i check it out? they would be so quick with the#do you care enough about it to stake your livelihood on it? to do it for your whole working life?#and obviously 8 yo 12 yo 14 yo 17 yo 18 yo me would get terrified and go no sorry and just not look into anything further#supposedly this is the safe option but everything i do feels meaningless#all of the jobs in this field seem meaningless#the job market in this field right now is dog shit and I'm fighting like hell for positions that just make me sad to think about#but every time i think hey what if i tried another thing#now my brain shuts me down with the do you care enough about it to stake your livelihood on it#your whole life on it#and the answer is no and it's gonna be no for a long time i bet#don't know if I'll ever find my way out of it#told my roommate's boyfriend about my general dispassion for pretty much everything in life#he asked me if I'm even a person#which feels very true#i feel like this path I've followed if i keep following it#I'm not going to be a person i can be proud of#i know it's really early in my life to say but#idk if it's nature or nurture or my own damn fault but all the ambition has been weaned out of me and I've been getting just surviving#i just wish i got told more you can be whatever you want to be :)#instead of whatever you'll do you'll be good at so do what makes money and push your hobbies to the side you can do them after you retire#your mom likes this and you're good at it so you'll like it too it'll make you money this is the best thing#the other thing is harder and doesn't make as much money don't do that you won't like it that much i bet#when i was younger#maybe I'd be struggling more but I'd be really happy and fulfilled#or maybe this is genuinely the best timeline and eggs who tried to pursue art hates it now#maybe I'd be really stupid at all the other things i gave a passing glance at#eggsistential speaks#tag rant
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
youtube
oh i'm gonna be so annoying about this album..... i even took notes while listening to this just now...
#first of all supernova i'm gonna be so annoying abt that song i can feel it in my bones the instrumental is crazy the vocal layering is#making me ascend to the sky fr i LOOOOVEEE this sound for them and i can't wait to hear it in full!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#next set the tone actually a great sound for an aespa beside structurally it reminds me of the savage bsides like i'll make you cry or even#iconic but yeah she's soooo aespa to me and i love it too#then mine instantly put it as one of my favorites already bc LISTENNNNNNN darkspa i love you so much i love this salty&sweet darker prettie#and sluttier sister and s&s was already all of that omfg#next licorice the BASSSSS are we hearing her??????? INSANE and again aespa and their heavenly vocal layering i just can't i'm foaming at th#mouth as i'm typing this i'm so serious#okay to the fun songs bahama is gonna be my feel good summer beach vibe jam i already know it and if better thing wouldve gotten an album#she wouldve been on there. perfect summer sound#long chat too she sounds really cute maybe not as memorable to be as bahama or even live my life but DAMN i love a good upbeat track#prologue feels like a little interlude to me and the BABY IM A WEIRDO :D I KNOW ! was so silly sdjfksjfdf plsssss but a cute sound overall#live my life TURN THAT SHIT UPPPPPPPPPP the most cheery track and i'm strapped in to listen to it until i die. also an eri track to me#melody ahhh my reve daughters ik they would be proud of this song it's sounds very beautiful already#much more up my alley than their previous ballads ngl#in conclusion i'm gonna be the most annoying person on the dash once all these songs are revealed to the public and#i am already sosososososososo in love with this album what the FACK#000
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
holiday season sucks
#im chill about it and that's the part that kinda breaks my heart#being home these days feels like a freakshow#sucks worse this time because i actually was so excited to come home this year#and it really hit me like wow. this is just not the place for me#there's just no scenario where i feel good about it. even though i'm chill??#i guess what i mean is like. i'm not tearing myself up over any of it#i could be a lot more sad angry upset etc about it if i wanted but i just don't really mind#and there's a part of me that wishes that i cared more because i deserve to feel safe and welcome with my own family#but instead i just still here like :/ well. i guess this is just how it is.#and i'll spend the rest of my life coming home and feeling like the court jester#and i dont rlly miss it at all.#but its like i have this weird sense of duty. that i should be the best son i can be because i wasn't the daughter they wanted#and i just think of all the things i want to do that i know i'll never do because i have this thought in my mind of *maybe*#if im good enough for long enough then they'll get used to it. but i cant do anything else#i wasted all my rebellion on transitioning and anything further would be over the line#i should be proud of the person that i am and to almost everyone else i am proud#but to them i just feel like. well this is me i guess your disgusting cringefail daughter with mental illness#tryiing to make up for existing. whatever#and thats what the holiday season has become. which sucks.
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
one thing I love about following celebrities/artists who are honest and proactive about their mental health struggles etc is I can’t count the number of times someone I know is going through something and I’m like ‘I’ve got a song for u’ and how much of my life involves telling myself ‘if [redacted] can do something/get better/etc then so can i’ (and having actual real evidence of it in front of me) and I can’t understate how much I appreciate these things.
but at the same time it involves a whole lot of watching people I care about suffer and you learn to read the signs and infer between the lines in songs and interviews, and yes we can never fully know what they don’t share with us, but when they do share things it’s not a big stretch to be like ‘this seems like it’s what life is like for you and I have taken encouragement from it but you deserve so much better’. and it’s easy to find ways to get angry at a predatory industry and realise things that could be hurtful if you’re already fragile.
and we can advocate for some things and help ourselves and the people around us feel better but it’s hard to meaningfully reach your faves as an individual. and there are things we can’t say on the internet in too much detail, speculation becomes the harmful kind of gossip, and so sometimes it’s a whole lot of internally saying ‘you’re doing incredibly well to have gotten to where you are but I wish for your sake things would get better faster’
#curse and catch 22 (not the song)#I didn’t mean to make this so anonymous as a post but maybe. it’s applicable to a lot of artists. I don’t know#just thinking about how sometimes someone will say something and it’s like ‘oh honey’ if you can see. why they might be saying it#like a glimpse into the top of an iceberg that makes a lot of sense to be there given other things they do and talk about#I feel like we’re in a unique position as a fandom with the way all four of them have been so vulnerable in different ways#and they may not be perfect but imo no one deserves to suffer like that especially for an extended amount of time. but the thing is#sometimes the fans are suffering and so are our faves and people appreciate the relatability and don’t have any basic compassion#or ability to see past their own struggles. with this fandom especially compared to a lot of others I’ve been in and I think I know why#but in the end the way I see it we’ve gotten so much relatable content and encouragement (bc the Finding The Positives Vibes which are ther#and sometimes there’s nothing we can give back apart from being a part of systemic change which all of us deserve for ourselves too#idk if this band is unique in this or I just find them more relatable personally and thus easier to see how hard they’ve worked#on themselves and taking risks in order to be honest. and it reminds me of the quote about how suffering won’t make your art better#healing will. and so imo anyone whose art is really good when they are going through a lot has me thinking. imagine what it’d be like#when life isn’t so hard for you?? or when you’re getting better but it just takes a long time I’m like. you deserve to feel better faster#this all said I’m incredibly proud and I’m not trying to insinuate there’s anything catastrophic going on bc there absolutely isnt#I am not in any way worried. I’ve seen tragedies about to happen and these guys show none of the signs. but I do relate to a lot of tidbits#pertaining to. certain chronic mental illnesses and/or being neurodivergent in an unaccommodating world (don’t ask which)#things I would anticipate would be a lot harder when there’s hordes of often fickle occasionally predatory fans to contend with#sometimes I just think of this idk#celebrities are people#5 seconds of summer#5sos#5sos fandom#cw mental health things
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
graduate school application fees have me carefully plotting out how exactly to make $78 in groceries last three weeks. I thought the stressful part would be over once I submitted my last application (which I did yesterday! I am very proud of myself!) but no the financial fallout is just beginning
#I’ll be fine- I’m really lucky my girlfriend’s family is so kind and packed me a bunch of frozen venison#And snacks and all manner of other good food. So that will go a long way#Plus while cleaning out the freezer my housemates and I found a big bag of Lima beans I had forgotten about that’s still good#Which means I’ll still get vegetables in without having to spend money on fresh produce#But gddamn I’m really feeling the expenses pile up- on top of other things like vet bills and money for tickets to fly out to a conference#at the end of this month (although maybe I get get my school to reimburse me for that#I need to get on it). I am proud to have gotten a talk slot though! And I am grateful to be able to pay the application fees at all#Even if it hurts a bit. But also perhaps the system is a bit broken if you need to shell out this much for the privilege of being rejected#(probabilistically speaking)#*sigh*#vent#graduate school jeremiad#personal#finances cw#food cw
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
My sister’s graduation day 😤 let’s go 👏🏽
#gosh it’s gonna be a long day and I’m running on two hours of sleep again#i only get the chance to work at night because I don’t have ✨privacy✨#and I’ve been going to bed late and waking up even more tired than usual and my mom’s been scolding me for it#and now I’ve had to tell her what I’m doing and I feel like I just gave another piece of me away again#everything I am everything I do has to be for other people#im so tired when will I give my last piece away 🥹#this was to make ME proud of ME I was doing it for myself and now I feel like it’s for her#and then she’s going to tell my dad and now it’s for him too#also I can’t even cry about it because she HAS to know why I’m upset#she keeps glancing up at me and talking to me in bits#all I have left is my emotions 🥹#anyhow sorry to start the day off so gloomy and depressing I have literally nothing to be sad about I’m very privileged#sorry you guys see me being a baby constantly 🥺 I really do have a good life and shouldn’t be complaining#here’s to a better day for us all#melifails#now i feel like a jerk subjecting you all to this😭 sorry sorry let’s move on#im gonna be a busy bee hopefully I can squeeze in a time for a nap#😭 I don’t waaaaaannnnnaaa sit for hours in the California heat MAYBE with the sun hitting us in the face#our football field is NOT kind in this way#hopefully my sister gets the shady side but even then the sun will hit us in the face eventually just not as long#im !!! excited!!!! I bought ice cream for today 👏🏽 I originally bought choco chip and minto moose tracks?? my sister loves mint flavor#so I bought mint Oreos too so she can eat them with her ice cream 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽#i assume we’re getting take out of some sort so that; ice cream; and uuuuuuu I don’t remember anything else I bought; my best friend did#bring us snacks yesterday!!! pretzels and cookies!!! so that!!!#okay brain no work no more I gotta get dressed love you muah muah muah
2 notes
·
View notes