#incorrect state quotes

[incorrect-states-quotes]

I'm just saying... New York would have never.

[littlefankingdom]

Bruce died(?) again

Jason: Well, it's my turn.

Dick: What are you talking about?

Jason: Everytime Bruce is gone, one of you starts to act just like him, pushing everyone away, acting as only you can be right, and fighting anyone that gets in your way. Dick did it, Tim did it, even Cass kind of did it. So, this time, I will do it.

Tim: Isn't that how you act all the time?

Jason: Whoa, fuck you. You are so banned from historical drama movie nights.

[batcavescolony]

Zeus: POSEIDON CONTROL YOUR CHILD!

Poseidon: I can do one of two things. I can be the God of the Sea or I can control Perseus Jackson. I cannot possibly do both.

[amandamadeathing]

Social network post for Echo

[draco-glacialis]

Sharon: Oh gosh I wish I got more sleep I only got six hours!

Billy: Six? I only got three!

Lilia: You guys got sleep?

Agatha, comes stumbling out of their room and grabs a jug of coffee before saying: What year is it??

[whizzing-fizzbee]

Sebastian, watching MC study: I’d kill to see you naked.

MC: Sorry, what was that?

Sebastian: …I still need to eat cake soon.

Ominis: He said he’d kill to see you naked.

[caslutz]

Ted Lasso Text posts: Part #3 (royjamie’s verison)

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[shit-people-probably-didnt-say]

Jesper: Wylan just asked me if I was mad at him for having the flu? Like hon, you were so delirious last night you thought we were late for a council meeting, dragged me into the bathroom and began presenting an idea to your own reflection

Jesper: Im not mad, Im entertained

[feelingthedisaster]

non-fox: you bet on your coach's sex life?

matt: we bet on everyone's sex life

[alien-slushie]

Alastor: Ugh, I heard a disgusting little rumor that all of Hell thinks Lucifer and I are "friends".

Angel Dust: Don't worry smiles, I'll take care of it.

Alastor: That's oddly kind of you Angel.

Angel: Hey! I am a very kind and loving person. Just leave it to me.

Alastor: Hmmm

*later*

Lucifer, barging into the hotel: Why does all of Hell think Me and Alastor are in a steamy love affair?!

Alastor: ....you had one job.

Angel: Qué Será Será.

[incorrect-states-quotes]

Alabama: Hold on! I’m having one of those things... a headache with pictures.

Georgia: ...What the fuck?

Oklahoma: They mean they're having an idea.

[incorrect-mtg]

Kaya: One hour alone in a rage room could fix me.

Lavinia: I could fix a rage room alone in one hour.

Kaya:

Kaya: That's not... The goal of rage rooms?

Lavinia: I know. But I could do it. Easily

[xielianlover2]

Lang Qianqiu: What is your favorite mythical story, Guoshi?

Xie Lian: The Story Of My Will To Live

Lang Qianqiu: I don’t think I’ve heard of that one before

[marksandrec]

Marks and Rec: Misc #2594

Unless they're demons, of course. Then they're just Horny Boys. (Dialogue is just made up, lol.)

"Daddy": 34:06 - The Death Row Poltergeists of Missouri State Penitentiary

"Head potential": 43:23 - The Trapped Spirits of a Haunted Escape Room

[mari-thesapphic-lady]

Agatha, having started living with Rio and their twins, few months ago

Agatha: I can't believe I missed the chance to see Death pregnant! With a baby bump! With twins!

Rio: Yeah, you missed, mi amor. I've never looked better.

Agatha: Can we have another baby?

Rio: No, Ags, no.

Agatha: But I want to see you pregnant.

Rio: So check out the photo album. I'm not going through another pregnancy, Ags.

Agatha: It can't have been that bad.

Rio: It wasn't, and I wouldn't mind having more children. I love my babies with all my black heart.

Agatha: But?

Rio: But I won't give you that so easily. Blame yourself, Aggie.

[rabiessnail]

Headcanon Mycroft and Greg meeting in training for the M16 squad try-outs as 19-20 year olds and NOT LIKING EACH OTHER ONE BIT

Always a competition, even when getting ready for bed in the dorms.

When people see them together, they're always like 'aww, you guys are dating yea?' and Myc and Greg are like NOOO *red faces red faces*

uhuh yep. Then one of the younger recruits find them snogging in the changing rooms, Mycrofts hair tousled and one of Gregs shoes is still lying patiently on the floor, ready to be put on.

--

Sargeant: Hey! Nice job today, Lestrade-- that junior commander position is really looking in your direction!

Mycroft: *must be better must be better* *shoots eight targets in the heart in a span of five seconds* heh hehh

Greg: *glares* *omg hes so hot the fuck*

Sargeant: Damn these to horny bitches I just need some decent snipers