#agathario incorrect quotes

[mari-thesapphic-lady]

Rio: IVE LOST MY WIFE

Rio: HAVE YOU SEEN HER

Person: What does she look like?

Rio, crying: BEAUTIFUL

[tremordusk]

Alice: I miss my mom

Rio: I was a mom once

Alice: you were?

Rio: *nods* well more like a father…

Alice: how were you a father?

Rio: I topped Agatha once and suddenly we had a kid—

Alice: *chokes on her cup of tea*

[marvelsgirl616]

[caseynovaksecretgf]

Mommy issues

[totally-correct-fandoms]

[five-milfs-and-a-twink]

Billy to his five moms: how do I get revenge on my enemies? Lilia: The best revenge is letting go and living your life to the fullest. Billy: ... Billy: okay so Agatha, how do I— Agatha: Brick.

[riovidalupdates]

teen: hey, do you think i could fit fifteen marshmallows in my mouth?

rio: you’re a hazard to society

agatha: and a coward. do twenty.

[skittlebits]

Shortly after Thanos snapped (probably)

Thanos: I killed half the universe as a gift for you, my love.

Rio: Um, you snapped them out of existence. There’s nothing for me to reap.

Thanos: I-

Rio: -didn’t think it through? Yeah, figured. Maybe try smaller scale next time. For example, Agatha sunk the Titanic and torched a zeppelin for me a while back. Lots of bodies. It was really sweet.

Thanos: *mutters* Fucking Agatha Harkness.

Rio: Well, obviously.

[hope-you-brought-kneepads-bitch]

Rio: I’m bored

Agatha: Then go and do something

Rio: I want to do you

Agatha: Not yet Rio

Rio: Why don’t you want me?

Agatha: I just said I’m not ready yet, there’s still things to do

Rio: Like what?

Agatha: like finish this meeting with Nicky’s teacher!

Rio looking at the woman sat at the desk

Rio: She can watch I don’t mind

Agatha: You want another woman to see me naked?

Rio frowning: No! You’re mine and how dare you suggest something like that

Agatha rolling her eyes: Why don’t you go and get Nicky and check out the new garden they have

Rio: They got a new garden?! Hell yeah I’ll be right back! *quickly leaves*

Agatha: I apologise for her behaviour, she often forgets where we are and says whatever she’s thinking

Nicky’s teacher: I think we should just get back to talking about Nicky’s behaviour

Agatha: Of course of course, so what was the word he used to his teacher?

Nicky’s teacher: it began with a C and ended with a T

Agatha: Ah, that’s his mother’s favourite word, okay I’ll have a word with her

Nicky’s teacher: I’d appreciate that very much

Rio coming back into the room with Nicky: That garden is bitchn’!

Nicky: Yeah Mama it bitchn’!

Agatha mumbling: fuck me

Nicky’s teacher: I see these meetings are going to be more frequent

[rexasaurus1]

(Part 1) Everyone is verified except Agatha..........

[mari-thesapphic-lady]

Agatha: I just want to hear those 3 words.

Rio: I love you.

Agatha: That’s sweet, but try again.

Rio: Ugh, fine...

Rio: I will behave.

Agatha: There we go.

[hermslore]

AGATHA ALL ALONG TWEETS

(part 5)

two more days till my lesbians come back to me guys

discord saw most of this first

[tremordusk]

Billy: So if you were the mother…who was Nicky’s Dad?

Agatha: He didn’t have one. I made him myself, similar to how your mother made you.

Billy: Oh…with magic?

Agatha: Yes

Rio: Actually I’m Nicky’s Father

Agatha: No you’re not

Rio: I was there

Billy: How?

Agatha: DON’T—

Rio: WHEN AGATHA AND I REALLY LOVE EACH OTHER—

[incorrect-multiverse]

*At some point when they’re first together, probably*

Rio: Agatha, when’s your birthday?

Agatha: Why? So you can look up my natal chart? So you can figure out my weaknesses? So you can destroy me?

Rio: …So I know when to wish you a happy birthday.

[born-in-neverland03]

*Rio smiles brightly*

Lilia suspiciously: Why are you smiling like that?

Rio: It's a beautiful day! Isn't it a beautiful day?

Lilia: Wha-

Alice: She pushed Jen down the stairs and Agatha smiled at her.

Jen: She pushed me down twice!

Rio: Agatha laughed the second time.

[idkimboredrnsodoomscroll]

Jac Shaffer: ok guys we are going to film you guys falling top speed straight down on a broom presumably to your deaths, please give me your best scream.

Everyone: *screams terrified*

Aubrey Plaza: *witch cackle*

Producer: Aubrey no it’s a-

Jac Shaffer: No, let her cook