#incorrect shadowhunters

[fics-and-quotes-andthelike]

Alec Lightwood: You know, sometimes I really think I can be too straight.

Magnus Bane: (covered in bi merch and sipping an iced coffee) How unfortunate for you.

[alec-prettyboi-lightwoodbane]

Jace: Any idiot would know that.

Simon: I knew that!

Jace: See?

[labryslabyrinth]

Alec: How on Earth did he get hurt?

Clary: Well… I kinda distracted Jace

Alec: What. Did. You. Do

Clary: There was a knife flying towards him so I yelled DUCK

Alec:

Clary: He freaked out and tumbled down the stairs

[dayque]

Magnus is like "Shadowhunters are annoying creatures" and then proceeds to save every generation's ass, marry a angel son and raise his own mini shadowhunter

[onceandfuturelesbian]

merlin, frantically trying to save arthur: is he gonna be alright?!

kilgharrah: i don’t know, does he normally just lay like that without moving?

[silmarillaure]

Ty & Dru: *wearing slightly lighter shades of black*

Helen: I see you're breaking out the spring colors.

[carelessflower]

Max: dad-dad!!! does bapak read dinosaurs to me lots cause he was there with them

Alec: yes, he created the asteroid that wiped them out

Magnus: okay I'm old but not that old

Rafael: bet he was the one to eat the apple and framed Eva bc he's a coward😔😔😔

[overheardinidris]

Magnus: I want to wake up next to you every day for the rest of our lives.

Alec: I wake up at 4:30 am.

Magnus: …

Magnus: I want to see you every day for the rest of our lives.

[starrieshq]

Julian: You really put everything aside to come save me? How'd you even get here?

Emma: Several traffic violations

Dru: Three counts of resisting arrest

Mark: Roughly 13 cans of energy drinks

Ty: Also, that's not our car.

[stormwvr]

james and lucie herondale whenever will speaks of jem

[culiehua]

Magnus: Sir, you are honorbound to protect these kids. Can you handle that?

Chairman: meow

[fics-and-quotes-andthelike]

Jace Herondale: I’ve been here in jail so long I think I’ve lost my mind.

Jace Herondale: The days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months.

Jace Herondale: How long have I been in here now? Almost a year?

Clary Fairchild: …….

Simon Lewis: (Done with Jace’s bs) This is Monopoly.

[alec-prettyboi-lightwoodbane]

Simon: Alec is amazing at concentrating. Once he starts reading, the only way he’ll notice you is if you take his book away. Not even if you hit him or shove him!

Izzy: That was him ignoring you.

[kaitcreates]

Magnus: Guys, seriously don't do paintball as a double date. It's a bad bonding activity and some people are too good at it. Lily: I don't know what you're talking about, Mark and I are best friends now. Magnus: That's because you two just gooffed off in the woods while I was being hunted for sport by my boyfriend.

[dayque]

Alec: Okay, the kids' snack is in the refrigerator, their schedules are written here, they can watch TV but don't leave them unattended for too long and for no, but NO, reason do you let them take a nap. If they sleep their sleep cycle will be a disaster later.

Jace: Bro, relax, everything's going to be okay.

*Magnus in the other room*

Magnus: Okay. Let's go over it.

Rafael: Lunch at 1, snack at 3:30 and dinner when you return. Not eating anything Uncle Jace cooks, not leaving the house to hunt demons even if he says it's safe, and we can't play jumping on the furniture or walls either. We can't do dangerous spells that involve...

Max: I know! I know!

Rafael: But I'm saying it!

Magnus: Let him say one part, go ahead Blueberry.

Max: I can't do spells that involve: fire, breaking things even if they are small, summoning animals that do tsss, or psss, or ksss *putting hands in the shape of little claws*, levitating or summoning demons.

Rafael: We also can't listen to Uncle Jace if he has a new idea about a spell we've never done before.

Magnus: Very good! I am so proud of my little sweets, and what do we do if there is an emergency and daddy or Bapa can't come help?

Both: Call Aunty Catarina and Aunty Clary to save Uncle Jace.

[tys-kitty]

Kit: That‘s absolutely ridiculous! Whoever wrote this book can‘t seriously believe that I will follow all of these silly suggestions!

Ty:

Ty: Kit, that‘s the code of law