#incorrect myths

[crazycatsiren]

Demeter: "I miss my daughter often."

Hera: "My husband drives me up the wall."

Hestia: "And once again what a blessing to be single and childfree."

[mtolympusmemes]

Hermes: It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.

[h0bg0blin-meat]

Athena: Who else was hiding in the laundry room trying to listen to Aphrodite and Ares's convo? Hermes: Me. I was in the laundry basket. Artemis: I was in the washing machine. Apollo: I was in the closet. Hermes: Hey congrats for coming out man! <3 Apollo: No I was literally in the closet. Hermes: Love is love. <3

[mytholots]

Medea: look Jason, I'm not slut shaming you but...

Medea: Actually yeah, I'm TOTALLY slut shaming you.

[hemogoblin-art]

Gaia: Alright, I need you to swear-

Nyx: Fuck.

Gaia:

Gaia: Swear as in 'promise'...

[incorrectgreekgods]

Poseidon: I trust Zeus. Demeter: You think he knows what he's doing? Poseidon: I wouldn't go that far.

[silentprincessandsweethibiscus]

Shadow just really, really wants to know how one would, theoretically, become a vampire. And for Vio to bite it. Preferably in that order. Vio, on the other hand, wants to do one of those things.

woo! new incorrect myths fic is up! bit of a lore dump but in a fun way! i started this for @shipmontharchives october prompt "bitten", but was unfortunately, a bit late. oh well, ive been meaning to write this chapter for a while (aka a year) now anyways. hopefully this can get me back to incorrect myths for a little bit, who knows.

[thedeathwitchescats]

If you work with/worship/are devoted to hades and are a staunch supporter of the homeric hymm to demeter, you believe that the only true version of the hades and persephone myth is that she was taken against her will, if you believe that that is absolute fact then I believe you are a disgusting waste of space. Not bc of pettiness, but bc at that point you are worshipping someone who you believe to be a pedophile, rapist and kidnapper. So fuck you. You can not fucking ignore THOUSANDS of years of myths that came before and after one fucking hymm, berate people for believing otherwise, and then fucking worship a pedophile. Fuck you. You are a waste of space.

[water-breathing-percy]

Leo: Frank, I need a favor.

Frank: I'm not kissing you again!

Jason: Kissing?!

Percy: AGAIN?!

[sayangrafayel]

MC: Can you keep a secret?

Sylus: Do you know anything about my life?

MC: No I do not. Good point.

[mytholympus]

Zeus: I heard you were talking bad about me.

Hera: Do you want to hear it again or did you get everything?

[crazycatsiren]

Macaria: "I push you off the cliff, father!"

Melinoe: "I explode you again and again with my shells, father!"

Hades: "Girls... I thought you loved me..."

Persephone: "Someday, my darling, you will get better at Mario Kart."

[mtolympusmemes]

Odysseus: I’m sick and tired of being called 'mortal' like, you don’t know that. Neither do I. I have never died even ONCE. Nothing has been proven yet. Stop making assumptions. It’s rude.

[h0bg0blin-meat]

Gadadhar: Valentine’s day is just a consumerist holiday that holds no real value other than drive people insane buying heart shaped chocolates for their significant others and pos- Krishna: I wrote you a poem. Gadadhar, already crying: You did?

[mytholots]

Apollo: If I fall…

Surya: I’ll be there to catch you.

Lugh: *looks at Sol* What if I fall?

Sol: Then I’ll fall with you, never leaving your side.

Huitzilopochtli: *watches these two interactions*

Huitzilopochtli, to Ra: And if I fall?

Ra: I’ll be the one who pushed you.

[chimera-tail]

Artemis: *concerned* You know those things will kill you, right?

Athena: *pouring another glass of wine* That’s the point.

Ares: *smoking a cigarette* We’re trying to speed up the process.

Apollo: *nods while eating raw cookie dough*