#incorrect guardians

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Peter: Are you from space?

Drax: No, of course not.

Peter: …

Drax: Nobody’s from space. I’m from a planet like everyone else.

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

“You just need to find someone who’s pathetic. Like you.”

— Raph, giving Leo dating advice

[book-place-incorrect-quotes]

Y/N: *walking into the room while yawning and stretching* Hey, guys. How’s it going?

Rocket: Where the hell have you been?

Y/N: Sleeping… why?

Gamora: Well, you’ve been sleeping these past two days straight, then

Y/N: Wow… I’m going back to sleep

Peter: *walking in and slamming the door* YOU’VE BEEN ASLEEP?!?! FOR THE PAST TWO DAYS?!?!

Peter: *angrily charging at Y/N* I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD

Y/N: OH SHIT-

[angelofthenight]

Quill, through Adam’s earpiece: Ask them something!

Adam: How are you feeling?

You: Fine.

Quill: Something personal!

Adam: At what age did you first get your period?

[fandomnerd9602]

For @omniman65

Alexei cries as he walks Yelena down the aisle…

Yelena: papa

Alexei: sorry it is just that you are so beautiful

Yelena: and?

Alexei: and I always knew you were perfect for one another!

Yelena hugs Alexei and walks up to meet Y/N at the altar…

[incorrect-starbula]

Peter: Rocket, tap into their security cameras.

Rocket: Oh sure, lemme just load my "Tap into every security camera on the planet" app.

Rocket: *Taps on a screen*

Rocket: Sorry if that sounded like sarcasm, it wasn't. I am in.

[gilly-moon]

Specimen : Heims Angelus, aka Winter Angel

[theodaione-incorrect-quotes]

Snape: Potter, I’ve left a letter telling your guardian not to worry— Harry: They won’t. Snape: that you’re safe— Harry: That’ll just depress them. Snape: —and you’ll see them in a few weeks. Harry: Do we have to?

[romanoffshouse]

Thor: For Christmas, I want a dinosour.

Rocket: Be realistic

Thor: Okay, I want to be happy.

Rocket: ...what color dinosour do you want?

[just1more-fangirl]

Zoro: We'll kill anyone who gets in our way! Luffy: No, not kill anyone! Zoro: Kill a few people! Luffy: Kill no people! Zoro: Kill one guy. One stupid guy who no one loves! Luffy: Now you're just making it sad.

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Drax: Okay so what’s the plan?

Quill: I just told you about it.

Drax: Did I look like I was listening when you told me?

Quil: Yes! You did!

Drax: Huh… I’m getting better at that.

Quill: …

[waterfire1848]

[ De aged Azula. ]

Zuko, seeing smoke coming from a room: Azula, are you okay?! Azula, are you dead! Oh! You’re right there. Wait! Is that blasting jelly!? How did you get the walls wet and on fire!?

Zuko: Azula, why does it look like a bomb went off in here?

Azula: A bomb did go off.

Zuko: A bomb did go off??? How did you get-

[ Azula looks down at the ground. ]

Zuko: Hey. Don’t give me that look. Don’t think you’re getting out of this by being cute.

[ Azula hands him a drawing she made. ]

Zuko: What? Why are you handing me this? What is this? More trash?

Zuko: Better be a written apology. Let me see this.

[ It’s a picture of everyone together. ]

Zuko: Oh. Oh, this is very nice. We gotta get this framed.

[incorrectleaguequotes]

Lux: Look at me straight in the eyes and tell me the truth, Jinx!

Jinx: You can’t expect me to look into your eyes and be straight.

[angelofthenight]

Adam: I didn’t do it for them. I did it for you, (y/n). I’d kill for you.

Adam, slowly smiling: Please ask me to kill for you.

You, sweating: ...First of all, calm down-

[fandomnerd9602]

Rocket: could that douche actually create a perfect society?

Y/N: nah. An imperfect being can’t create perfection. It’s unobtainable

Adam: so a perfect being, like me, could?

Y/N: sorry Warlock. You’re a perfect specimen. There’s a difference.

Cosmo: did you just compliment and insult someone at the same time?

Rocket: that’s an art form im dying to learn! (Laughs)

[fandoms--fluff]

Damon after being put in charge of Caroline and Elena's little siblings because they're in college:

Stefan: Where's Y/n and Jeremy?

Damon: They went out

Stefan: They're grounded!

Damon: ...Are they not allowed out when they're grounded?