#in denial that its actually ended
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Okok so toh SPOILERS!!! And this is going to be long I'm so sorryy
the last episode of the owl house is out and omg please watch it, it's so awesome !!!!
I'm trying not to spoiler it for anyone who is going to read this so if you want to come talk to me abt it you can message me and just bring up the fact that you wanna talk abt Watching and Dreaming. Like this shit has effected me sm. I'm crying that shit hurt mentally.
It was so good though like the animation was awesome and like that show is why I want to get into animation but it's all the effort and actually getting myself to do it like I do with my art, but still oml the effort the team put into it , they did so good like all of them did an awesome job !!!!!
I swear I'm going to just casually get a cosplay of Luz from Watching and Dreaming done at some point and may or may not end up wearing it for Halloween if i do go through with it.
Ok ok bye and pleasee this show was sol good I swear I'ma change my account to TOH stuff because the brain rots coming back. And we are gonna see how long that lasts for.
Ok bye nowwww!!! Thanks for listening to my lovely rant :D
#toh#the owl house#toh spoilers#omfg Watching and Dreaming was awesome i cannot shut up abt it#toh is the best#in denial that its actually ended
0 notes
Text
THE SAG AFTRA STRIKE IS OVER
OH MY GOD
THIS IS NOT A DRILL. THEY GOT A FAIR DEAL. FILMING SOON FOR ST
#byler#stranger things#sag aftra#sag strike#im actually in denial#the official website says its over#officially ending on the 9th#if im wrong please lmk#OH MYGOD
112 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sometimes I think of Amy Pond, who grew up being called mad by those who wielded the word as a tool of exclusion and shame —
Amy Pond, who though forced into the hands of four psychiatrists, still clung to that which they called madness until those systems which elevate psychosocial conformity above humanity stripped it from her —
Amy Pond, whose imaginary friend reappeared for a single hour after twelve years and reignited that faith before disappearing for two more years —
Amy Pond, who spent those those two years under the same implicit threat ingrained in her through psychiatric violence, and thus began to believe the man who stopped the invasion was “just a madman with a box,” only for him to agree, and to also call her “mad, impossible Amy Pond,” reframing madness as non-negative for the first time in her life —
Amy Pond, who ignored the disembodied voice of her imaginary friend even as she ran away with him for real, who still lived each day with the traumatic internalization of deviancy dictated upon her by the psychiatric-industrial complex that shaped her from childhood —
Amy Pond, who wouldn't acknowledge the Doctor's voice, such that it took an Angel in her eye that was literally killing her to ensure she couldn't reality check herself —
Amy Pond, who stood before a room which muttered about “the psychiatrists we brought her to,” and though afraid, escaped their rigid parameters of acceptable existence.
#I like seeing it as indicating she began hearing his voice when he was gone for all those years! why else wouldn't she say anything?#actually psychotic Amy agenda#Amy Pond#eleventh doctor#reclaimed language#oh look its another antipsychiatry themed doctor who post#sumn abt in Fairies At The Bottom Of The Garden audio AND Imaginary Enemies comic we see Amelia bein called slurs against psychotic people#(shes called psycho in both)#like!!! and SO MUCH OF AMYS STORY is about her claiming her agency in ways that previous companions weren't allowed to-#companions whose status as a Wife was a signifier of an to end of their value individually- 'this is no place for a married woman' etc#in some cases Wife-ness forced upon them *as* a denial of agency 'I spent all that time trying to find you I'm not going back now!' etc#whereas Amys story deconstructs that; Amys “Choice” is an illusion- Amy being a Wife doesn't demote her agency as an companion#anyways I love that aspect of reclaimed agency for Amy but ALSO#“madness” as an expression of agency against systems of oppression is SO relevant. the mind defends itself and the alternative isnt better#the oppressive system in this case being ableist structures and the psychiatric system ITSELF which is a whole other layer#the moral being that even if the Doctor WAS a delusion? he'd still be a needed coping mechanism for a child who says “ppl always leave”#and instead of examining her feelings of abandonment they insist 'aLiENs DoNt ExIsT' as seen in the 'sTaRs DoNt ExIsT' psychiatrist in TBB#they don't care that she's in PAIN- why would they?- they just care that she's 'abnormal' and therefore not deserving of humanity#(eleventh) doctor is neurodivergent tag#I mean technically this is about Amy but I once (twice) used that tag on the post about the Master. its the spirit of it!#and Amy Pond + her Raggedy Doctor as “mad” people is very *chefs kiss*#((you know what im putting the tag on my last Amy post :D ))#Mels experienced this very differently and I'll make a post about her at some point- I just wanna make sure my points are got across better#sumn abt Amelia's “crazy” was Mels' “delinquency.” Amy treated as if she doesn't know her own life while Mels treated as threatening#sumn abt adultification of Black girls while Amy is infantilized#Amy Pond who could rewrite reality in a reborn universe because she grew up with a Crack in her wall that no one believed was special —#ableism#saneism#unreality#because I mean Amy's stand against psychiatric dehumanization was to REWRITE THE UNIVERSE with her Crack powers
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
[full of turkey and deviled eggs, half asleep] I don't think this story is sad enough actually I think I have to make it worse
#my mom complained abt the ql ending again so i went off on a tangent on how good a reunion hug between al and sam would be#so now im “hm i touched on it a little in chapter 2 that his presence was comforting even if he couldnt touch but. make it Worse#just keep making these boys upset actually“#cause when ur brain is filled with mourning for someone you want to hug your bestie but. what if the one person you most want to hug#cant. they can be there#they can be there and talk to you and hold your gaze and tell you a joke but they cant touch you#not even long distance the normal way. long distance in a way that a plane ticket cant fix#of course there are the homosexual undertones yes yes but the core denial of closeness is what im getting at#imo from how we see boy interact#sam is a physical person. he likes just gently touching his friends#he may not be like a giant hugger specifically but in the gentle baps on the head to just shoulder brushes and close talking#hes a physical person so the denial of that with his closest bud must be agony over time#anyway yeah im gonna make it sadder!!! its my mental illness i get to pick the sadness!!! whos gonna stop me!!!#and i will be writing him happy at the 4077th. as recompense.#and writing big bj and hawk and trapper and co holiday family happy time. it is good.#.yappin
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
in a disenchanting turn of events my father's cancer arc has inspired empathy in my sister so once again im just a heartless cunt. "I can't hate him like that anymore"? skill issue if ive ever seen one
#calling it an arc for dramatic effect bc i cant tell you how deeply not serious the whole thing is like nobodys dying. whatever#x#she ditched the daddy issues train to jump on the mommy issues one which is respectable i guess#but personally my hater brain has 2 hemispheres and i intend to use them#my genuine toxic trait is once i idgaf i really mean it like they could crawl and i would simply quote what they said to me way back when#to which sweet people kindly suggest perhaps i am simply in denial and then i have to say no seriously fuck off#and thats how i ended up with that guy calling me his arch nemesis for like 3 years after we last spoke which i admit the gossip was fun#tf was this post about#thank u for subscribing to my diary see you next time xoxo gossip girl#no but actually imagine someone calling u an arch nemesis in earnest. & its not in a sexy homoerotic way? biggest disappointment of my life#talking about not giving a fuck is makijg me feel like im unironically sayinf welcome to my twisted mind or something. sincere apologies .
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
If me thoughts were more coherent id type up a thing about how if it weren't for our specific circumstances stubborn would often doom us but alas
#do you guys ever think about how we could genuinely have just killed adversary when she let us and have the good ending#but his bitch ass is going so strong on the denial front that if you try to do that you end up in the fury with broken of all voices#(to he clear that's to point out just how bad it got(#we can go too far so many ways#make ourself all wrong at twitching just because we refuse to let go#it is so important to me that you can't be stubborn about shit if you dont see another way#and oftentimes that way is better#being so dead-set on one path youve taken will often be harmful in the long run#refusing to take another path forward might doom you to an eternal circle of harm#and it does! its just fhat its fun and sexy here#i think we're more in the area of “in a scenario where we are actually limitless there's no way to prove him wrong” and thus#we die. we are unwound. our ribs crack and break on her knee. it's because we refuse to see another way#but we are functionally immortal and sadomasochists so it doesn't seem bad
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
"Takeomi is Sanzu&Senju's half-brother" headcanon, sure
But is the Akashi grandmother biologically related to him or not... Hm....
#i can see it go both way#still ends up shitty bc the akashi household is without a doubt abusive#but the way it could be#HM......#mindless rambling incoming#non-blood related could go 'youre not related to me - youre basically a stranger i allow to live in my house (also take care of#my grandkids/my son's kids for me)'#blood related could go 'youre the reason your mother/my daughter left'#argh argh argh#blood related add more depth/complexity (story-wise) methinks#bc its really the 'youre just like your father (derogative)' speech BUT#with non-blood related they dont actually know takeomis bio father - just that he looks insanely like him#but with blood related the anger is HERE#non blood related is mostly just disdain#like 'we're keeping you bc your mom left and we loved her. thats in memory of her. (also: raise your siblings)'#blood related also has that but theres also the full denial of seeing him as his moms son? hes just his dads kid#non blood related is 'you bear our family name bc you mom and stepfather got married. we're legally forced to provide for you'#blood related also has that -- but the grandmother would know him from before that#not a lot bc ive got other hcs to stick to but. but.#the common point between the two is 'akashi grandma loves her grandkids (sanzu&senju) but has utter disdain toward takeomi'#(not enough to be the one in charge of raising them tho *coughcough*)(altho i do think she died when sanzu&senju were tweens)#so like. choosing 'isolation by being allowed to stay for legal reasons(+sanzu&senju)' or 'isolation despite being blood related (and also:#the moral obligation of taking care of blood descendant; even if you want them out)#plus plus takeomi looking like his father while sanzu&senju look exactly like their mom - subconsciously or not grandmother rather look aft#the ones that look like her daughter than the one that looks like the man that (supposedly) ruined her daughters life#Akashi headcanon day ig#arghhhhhhhh#and then theres the fact his stepfather is more accepted/welcomed in the family than he is
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Well clearly I am confused.
#My art style keeps changing and every time I do something new#I yearn for the days of old#where i want to draw what i used to draw like but also loathe the anatomical inconsistencies#i think 2020 may have had my best works which sucks because i'm on the decline#text post#lana please shut up#i also want to ask why there are mmx fans that keepndrawing charactera with#odd skin tones that are very drastically different from canon#it confuses me greatly#is it from an au or some sort of fic that isnpopular on here#or a fanon type thing because it seems to be consistent between select artists#i think skin color alteration is very strange on canon colors#i just end up collecting characters with my skin color like miruko or grey instead of altering things#its odd but fine i think i just dont understand the motivation behind it#actually it's kinda reverse of what artists do to faputa on pixiv#it makes me feral when people make faputa reg's skin color and then go “it's the lighting”#as if to say if you put me under a white light then i too shall be white in skin tone#or god forbid they have someone say indoors and become an entirely different race#maybe both ways makes me mad idk#i just hope it isnt the same thing that happened with dave strider back in homestuck days#it might be and i'm in denial#i will probably stick to canon skin colors for my fanart#unless the skin tone varies in the ref images then i'll bullshit it#adding tags is like whispering#but most of my characters (human looking) have whacky skin tones#by which i mean theyre usually everything but pale#but at the same time#the only pale character i can think of is the stark white one that is based on 0²#and i guess my tiger character but he has vitiligo since he was made Back Then when it was a fad#everyone else is fucking green or orange or somethign
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
i feel like im never going to be fully satisfied by any saw sequel (or the fanbase for that matter) bc i dont think the majority of ppl involved read jigsaw the same way i did.
#all these attempts to like humanize and flesh him out just end up totaly misrepresenting him and his goals#no he is not actually trying to improve the world hes a sadistic little man whos angry about dying and coping with it badly#he gets a front row seat to all his games and cuts trophies off his dead victims. bc he likes the violence#he puts people who absolutely DID NOT DESERVE IT (in saw 1 at least) in these elaborate death traps that they overwhelmingly fail to escape#sometimes he puts a completely innocent person in the crossfire (like seriously who is that guy who amanda had to kill to get her key)#hell they explicitly say that guy in the chair trap did nothing wrong he was just dying 'for a greater purpose' to test the trap.#but nobody ever acknowledges all this its just like 'what if we give him depth by saying serial killing isn't so bad'#and it never works and usually ends up with him being unbelievably self impressed and annoying#id honestly rather they explore his 'depth' by just. expanding on him as in denial and wanting revenge#which tbf i thought X was doing a decent job at until the last half hour when they threw the character study away entirely#like just give me a jigsaw who is angry at dying and takes it out on the Living because he has no other outlet. ill accept that.#him killing people who need to go can be like. gory tasteless fun in the sequels but it makes it like.#idk. less satisfying to me? or it just puts this wall up that makes the movies not come together the way the first one does.#avpost#movie diary
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
The "TV shows that have ended their run, yet fans refuse[d] to accept that they're over" starter pack.
#the lion guard#tangled: the series#she ra and the princesses of power#the owl house#tlg#tts#rta#spop#toh#no because I see a DISTINCT fucking pattern in fandoms nowadays#where every time a popular show comes to an end fans will either be frothing at the mouth for a new season#be completely in denial over the show ending#and/or demand the showrunners on social media to continue the show or make change.org petitons as if that actually does jacksh*t#It's like a tradition or rite of passage for fans to not to let shows end when they y'know end#I think the earliest example of this I recall was when Lion Guard ended and everyone was fighting for a Season 4#that had no chance of happening bc it was repeatedly said that Season 3 was the last#That was back in 2019 and I lowkey blame that fandom for kickstarting this trend#because there is almost no show nowadays that can rest in peace without fans blindly believing that the show will have more seasons#whether it be false articles made for trolling or people just getting ppl's hopes up for no reason#in no way am I surprised that ToH got the same treatment from its fans only weeks after its finale was released#I just had to say something because this trope can get very astounding when you look into it#like a history book of something that seems miniscule but gets more “holy fuck” ish as you read it more and more
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
It seems to really be hitting my mum just how young she was when she had me in light of her upcoming birthday
#+Extra#like on the one hand she feels old cus its a big birthday coming up but on the other hand it seems to only just be hitting her just#how young she is to have a 22 year old daughter which is frankly old news at this point she was always too young just in denial#we had a very odd conversation last night in which she started off by saying that my soon go be 18 yr old brother and the 19 yr old#definitely arent responsible enough to watch the kids for a couple of hours while she gets her hair but then that its ridiculous that an#under 18 yr old (her phrasing) cannot open a bank account without a parent because she was entrusted with an entire human being at that#age and so he should be able to open a bank account by himself and i was listening like no thats the wrong conclusion its the opposite the#adults in your life shouldve been more concerned about you also what a revisionist recount saying that no one was concerned about you#having a baby at the age and it was probably because my dad was an adult so they felt they had no need to be concerned when i know all of#your family tried to express concerns that you wouldnt hear which led to years of animosity during my childhood staff at your college also#expressed concern as did your friends you just dont wanna admit that now. also how can they not be trusted with the kids for a couple of#hours when youre 15 minutes down the road as basically adults when 1 is going off to uni in September supposedly and the other has#basically moved out already and i was left entirely alone with the kids at younger than 15?#the sexism and gender stereotyping continues to perplex me#anyway hoping no one got to the end of this rant to add that im once again reminded that my birthday is actually just a day for my mum to#mourn the youth she missed out on by having a baby stupid young
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
the onceler 🤝 notre dame de paris 🤝 the clash <- disappearing randomly and giving me trust issues about my own brain for the rest of my life
#the clash got replaced with the who except i wanted to stay obsessed with the clash and it took me like 4 months to accept i was now#obsessed with the who#nddp i knew it was fading months before it actually ended but i was so in denial about it but eventually i had to take down all the#pictures i had on my wall and then became really depressed. also it was 2020 which didn't help#the onceler was the absolute worst bc i was in the peak of my hyperfixation and then suddenly it week later it just ended??#then entered the worst depression of my life and had to unfollow every onceler blog and filter his tag and would listen to breakup songs#somehow i'm back in the onceler fandom but only for everything about it Other than the actual onceler#but like why would my brain do this to its own self. where is the benefit#anyway#ramble
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
how dare will toastito write so many completely relateable songs. i have been listening to almost nothing but csh the past few days and i am beyond inconsolable about it
#spam brain#my brain is mush and also blindingly sad#also i didnt realize HOW many songs he had released???? like fr i didnt notice just how many fucking eps csh has#and theyre SO GOOD!!!! AND FOR WHAT!!!!#i need to buy teens of style asap. and also teens of denial#i wonder if its possible to get physical versions of most of the other eps?#i feel like if it is it would be. really hard lol#anyway ig spotify is good for something and that something is reminding me how insane i am abt csh#oh ALSO hot take famous prophets (minds) would actually be fucking awesome if the production quality wasnt fucking absymal#its just a little too chaotic for me to enjoy most of it but the end is natch#ALSO ALSO hot take drunk drivers/killer whales single version is so fucking good. just as good as the album version#ok im done#ill be back in a few days to continue talking abt csh probably lol#Car Seat Headrest#CSH#non fandom
1 note
·
View note
Text
always feel kinda weird when i make a canon character “worse” than they are in canon in my own hcs but also like hyness was a literal cult leader who exploited the sisters and hit zan onscreen and literally used her and her sisters bodies as tools in his boss fight so like. canonically he is a horrible person who’s actions just get sweeped w a vague “oh he might have been corrupted actually theyre cool now” ending. so i guess its not that strange to just lean into him being abusive in my hcs
#like i get it star allies is the friendship game where everyone and everything becomes a friend in the end#but like... he literally gives me lusamine vibes lol#im not saying hes gotta be this one dimensional evil guy bc like he very well could have meant well and did genuinely#save the sisters lives and in my hc he does take in baby mag out of goodwill initially#if partially out of spite towards the ancients but he still initially wanted to make sure he had a parental figure#and part of why hes got so many followers is bc hes very convincing and frighteningly. genuine? to some degree?#idk tho this is all very loose hcs in a game that didnt really focus too hard on the specifics of their backstory#i think its just that hes convinced himself hes right no matter what and what hes doing is 100% ethical#like he thinks hes helping zan by keeping her from her sisters and hes helping mag by attempting to turn him against his ancestors#just in a constant state of denial that eventually drives him to hurt people and makes him lose everything#and ik none of the characters are extremely complex and well developed bc a lot is up for interpretation at the end of the day#but man. idk the dlc ending bugs me to this day i wish so bad it wasnt just shrugged off w ''oh he was possessed actually idk''#echoed voice
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Im p sure my sister made a fake acct on instagram, larping as the people she said were doing all of these Horrible Illuminati type things to her and i guess. Shes trying to convince me its real too? Bitch. Your dumbass is so far behind. I know your entire game and im so tired and bored of you. Like. All you have in your life rn is being able to be creepy online to people you formally knew, consuming conspiracy qanon shit, yelling at your family members for not pampering you bc you decided you deserve special treatment and Arent actually ashkenazi bc that would fuck up your entire worldview, like, girl, you're so boring and readable. You dont know secret shit about the world no one else knows about, otherwise you wouldnt be so easily and readily able to find that conspiracy bs anyways. I dont know why you keep trying short of being bored and needing attention.
#the only person from your past who continues to fuck with you is a man youve manipulated into thinking you're the end all be all#of womanhood even w your lack of ass.#like i feel so bad for him lmao. he deserves SO MUCH BETTER. holy shit. he always has.#rly hope he figures that out and ditches you for someone who will actually love him and treat him right and not constantly#lead him on to think that whatever yall got going on is going to lead somewhere deeper.#the govt does everything in its power to hide the fact that it oppresses minorities. but ig all those readily available qanon sites are#totally in the know about the 'Secret Thins The Governemnt Does'#like are you just in denial? your narcissist ass thinks that bc the govt is going after minorities the most that thats not acrually true#because everyone should know that ~jessica is the ultimate victim and she and all the other white ppl are the only ones targeted'#like are you jealous of minorities oppression??? bc that is genuinely the vibe i get from you#ik our family isnt great about validating your feelings and trauma but that doesnt mean you get to go and be jealous of other ppl#for having their trauma recognized. like fuck dude. all of this and for what.
1 note
·
View note
Text
oh Im so unwell... life destroyed, the vn destroyed me who could've predicted it.... I am bawling in shock I had to stare in awe for the credits it's so expected but the sliver of hope killed me....
#ramble#it was his special ending#I am slowly feeling sick because of it#like I am so dramatic but I feel like vile is coming up#like I didnt bawl that much its more the shock and stress#I thought he would better himself somewhere else and wed see him- despite spoilers#and bam why did he do that#it makes sense its so him#but why why why why why why why why why#you cant fix it... hes either broken or gone#im so unwell I dont know how to continue#I jk but ik the other routes will not destroy me like his#but im still scared bruh...#I feel like rewatching that ending because I am in shock and going through 5 stages of grief rn denial#I rlly was like wow its going to be bittersweet#I was so wrong bruh its not funny... I mean it can be but its rlly not#how do I continue after that erm#hes actually so real but bruh#why couldnt they go together
0 notes