#implied childhood trauma

[trauma-culture-is-blog]

Trauma culture is when my dad dies I’m going to throw a party and put his ashes in my cats litter box if I can’t think of something worse by them

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[whumpshots]

Whumptober #15

Trope of the day: childhood trauma

_

Whumpee involuntarily flinches when Caretaker accidentally closes the door with more force than intended - loud 'thud' and a quick hushed "Whoops" is heard as they move through the house.

And that is all.

Still, Whumpee is tensed up and their heartbeat far too fast against their chest. Loud doors, footsteps... even the way someone says "Hi" makes Whumpee feel like they did something wrong. That someone will walk up and scream at them.

Or worse.

The door to the kitchen opens and Whumpee jumps when Caretaker comes in, instinctively hiding that they were about to make themselves something to eat. Caretaker just smiles at them, walking to the fridge.

"Have you seen the cheese?," they ask, rummaging through the fridge as Whumpee feels their mouth run dry.

"Sorry, I uh... It's here," they mutter, moving to give Caretaker the package they hid behind themselves, hoping the other cannot see the sandwich they were about to make. They didn't ask, they were just hungry. Now they fucked up, they always fuck up...

"Thanks, kid," Caretaker just says with a smile and gets a plate. "Do you want to stay there or eat your sandwich?" Raising their brows they look at Whumpee, who cannot stop themselves from probably looking really dumbfounded.

Oh.

Caretaker's hands are on their shoulders, still giving them some space as Whumpee ducks their head. "You can move freely in this house and you can eat whatever and whenever you want. Okay?" They wait for an answer, but Whumpee's tongue is too heavy. So they just nod. "Okay. Then let's have some lunch together."

[girlyteengirl16]

yes ofc i’m normal and can be trust around sharp objects

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

Nobody is “too young” to be cynical or jaded or hate their life. There is no appropriate age for that. If someone is experiencing that at any age, their mental health is at risk. Doesn’t matter how young they are, or how easy their life seems. Just because existential dread didn’t hit you until later in life, doesn’t mean everyone else gets to be so lucky.

“You think life sucks now? Just wait until you’re grown” okay grandpa what if they don’t make it to adulthood? What if it gets worse until they only see one way out and they take it? Stop being dismissive. Stop forcing your problems onto young people and start taking them seriously about things. Period.

(Inspired by this post)

[insomniacmiss]

GOODBYE, YOU

As a Joe Goldberg fan, I have to speak up about the end of the last season... And no I am not a romanticizing him. Also, I prefer the book version Joe because he is raw and not a watered down version, giving him 'redeemable characteristics'. The first book of 'You' is the one and only you need to read to understand who he really is. Keep seeing people in the comments saying, "Hate book Joe Goldberg because he's creepy and or disgusting compared to the show on Netflix." Hmm, how do I tell you this..? Book Joe is the first and real version of Joe. Netflix show Joe is just a watered down version of him, trying to make him somehow likable because, let's be real, if Joe was not likable, you clearly wouldn't want to watch the show.

With that said; there will be huge spoilers for the Netflix show plus the book(s). If you don't want to be spoiled, don't read this post.

Let's start from the beginning because most fans, or rather 'viewers', forget what the show/books are actually about. The show/books are narrated from the perspective of Joe Goldberg, who at the start was a bookseller with a traumatic childhood. His mom and him were beaten by her various boyfriends and Joe shot her current boyfriend to save his mother. Instead of living with her son in peace, she abandoned him to start a new life/family. The Netflix show wasn't going really deep into his childhood (trauma). However, the book(s) gave us a bit more information about his mother and their toxic relationship dynamic. His mother would drop him off or as Joe said 'dump' him at Key Foods. She would tell him they were playing hide-and-seek but he knew they weren't. Joe would play along. Everyone knew about it but no one called the cops. His mother would then return and slap him hard on the face and scream at him to not 'run away' or pull 'that shit' again. He promised to be a good boy. This was explained in the book 'Hidden Bodies'. His mom wasn't abusive towards Joe in the show. At least I couldn't find anything about his mom slapping him. That's a big difference, in my opinion. His mother was more of a victim in the show who was trying to protect her son while she slapped him hard on the face in the book, pretending Joe ran away when she clearly dumped her son. It wasn't a secret, everybody knew, but she still decided to slap Joe and play this charade. And the fact she slapped him hard told me everything I had to know about his mom. I firmly believe that in the books his mom was abusive towards Joe. You have to read the books thoroughly because he would drop vital information about his past every now and then. Some of Joe's stories are lies that he presents to the reader in order to manipulate you, yes, you.

Sometimes he tells the truth;

I believe him when he tells us his mother dumped him at Key Foods and later slapped him hard and screamed at him, pretending he ran away.

and sometimes he lies;

I do not believe Joe when he tells us he was not the one trying to force himself on his classmate in 4th grade but she was the one who tried to take his virginity.

And yes, there exists a scene in the first book that mentions it. In the end, Joe was the one sent to the psychologist, to the dean's office, and to the counselor where Joe had to show on a 'show-me-who-touched-you-where' doll where he touched her.

Why don't I believe him that he's innocent? Various reasons: I'm aware that Joe is the unreliable narrator. I'm also aware that Joe likes to be honest occasionally so that it's easier for him to feed us lies later on. Very powerful manipulation tactic, by the way... I mean, lying to you, but sprinkling in truths from time to time so that you believe me or can't even tell the difference between lies and truths is powerful. I'm also aware he likes to play the victim all the time. When Beck found his box with her bloody tampon and other stuff in it, Joe tried to blame Beck. It's her own fault she found his box with her stuff in it because she snooped around, she's crazy, it's her pms, she's unhinged, a wild animal. He doesn't see anything wrong with stealing her stuff and keeping it in a box. Because Beck belongs to him, she's just an object. I'm also aware that Joe can and probably would rape a woman. Big words, I know, shocking even! How dare I say such a bad thing? Well, the real Joe Goldberg (book Joe Goldberg) is literally spitting this information right into your face. In the second book 'Hidden Bodies' Joe is falling in 'love' with Love but also tracking down Amy (short summary: after she stole a huge cache of valuable rare books, he tries to track her down.) In one scene Joe's engaging in a conversation with Forty. Both talk about scripts and Joe had written down some of his disturbing fantasies. In one of these fantasies, he catches Amy before she was able to steal his books and flee the shop, keeping her locked up in his cage, using her as a slave. What kind of slave? Sex slave, of course. Because that's the only slave Joe Goldberg wants to keep in his cage. And I don't know about you but I don't think Amy would be overjoyed and consent to that. And if you try to tell me it's just a fantasy, he literally killed Beck because she didn't want to be with him. He also talked about how he could give it to Beck right now even though she was screaming/crying for help. And after Beck managed to ran out of his cage and upstairs, trying to escape through the front door (door was locked!) Joe wrapped his arms around her and pulled her behind the counter. He kissed her neck while she was hitting and scratching him in order for him to let her go. He did stop but kept talking about how she was his broken doll. Joe doesn't give a fuck about consent, he pretends he does. There is also no empathy on his side. Sorry, but, "I could give it to you right now but you have to scream and cry!?" doesn't sound empathetic to me. She's scared, she doesn't want to be there.

The name of the girl in 4th grade is Maureen Grady, her nickname 'Mo'. People called her 'Ho Mo', not funny. Maureen was Joe's crush back then, he describes Maureen in the book as gruff, an odd misfit. They were on a trip with the class, touring the deck of a tall ship, it was according to Joe 'boring' so they ditched the tour and broke into the off-limits hull. According to Joe, Maureen told him she would 'steal his virginity', he then punched her in the face, escaped and told the teachers. Joe also added that Mo's the fucked-up now; a twice-divorced paralegal with a profile on OkCupid and a Pomeranian named Gosling, obviously she'll be alone forever. But after telling us that he then says, he prefers to live in the moment, like it's no big deal. All of that appears weird to me. I mean, Joe obviously stalks her, after years, keeping tabs on Maureen. He also dances around the topic, keeping it vague. Joe never really tells us the whole story. And he never straight up says that he is innocent, that he didn't touch her. And Joe never claims that she did touch him. You know who else dances around a topic..? Liars.

You have to try to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Don't let Joe manipulate you.

The book(s) do a very good job in displaying how misogynistic Joe really is. He keeps talking about tits and pussy and sex, objectifying women every second. Joe does not want love or connection, he wants control, sex.

They toned it down for Netflix but that's no excuse for you to say, "I didn't know!" Joe still objectifies them but not in the same way book Joe does. You actually have to use your brain, shocking. You don't even need a high IQ to understand the message.

This is why the ending of the show was so perfect. People who still didn't understand the point of the show were called out.

MAYBE THE PROBLEM ISN'T ME. MAYBE... IT'S YOU.

Pointing directly at you, calling you out.

"They nerfed Joe!" - "Bad ending!" - "We're women ahh!" - "Feminist ending!" - "They went woke!"

Breaking news: Joe Goldberg was written by a... WOMAN, outrageous, I know! Joe is the bitch/slut/whore of a WOMAN, he belongs to a WOMAN, whoa!

"Come on, it's just a show/fiction, why do they have to lock him up? And not give him a happy ending?" Maybe because both the books and the show are written/produced in a way to criticize a lot that happens in real life. Misogyny, anti-vaccine, forgiving or romanticizing a murderer because of his childhood (trauma.) I enjoyed 'You' because it was talking about real life problems in the fictional world. Why is his name Joe and not Steve? Because of the idiom; 'average Joe'. Both the show and the books want to tell us that someone like Joe exists in real life and he's not the huge, intimidating guy who grabs you, screams at you and threatens you. He could be the sweet bookseller, your employee, your neighbor, your professor or your boss. Joe could be anyone and you wouldn't notice it because he's gentle, he's kind, he's supportive, he 'loves' you in a way no one else has loved you before (or could love you...) 'You' is filled with a lot of messages for us. It's not just a show for fun, it never was supposed to be. If you don't like messages in shows, don't watch 'You'. Not every piece of media is just a silly, little fictional story with no real meaning behind it. And that's okay. 'You' was made for the people who love to see real life getting dissected in a fictional world. And it's not just a silly, little story for you to enjoy. It's a confrontation, showing you what's wrong with the real world.

Joe Goldberg NEVER was a good person, he was just able to fool his victims. Yes, he was also a victim back in his childhood. Yes, he has mommy issues. And yes, Joe has huge abandonment issues. But nothing, NOTHING, that happened to him justifies his disgusting behavior. Joe's just recreating what his mother and him had, over and over again. Joe will never find the destined 'you' because she doesn't exist. All Joe does is projecting, manipulating and claiming. "I did this for YOU so YOU belong to me." Book Joe also loved calling Beck a whore/slut/dirty and no, not in the bedroom. Joe wants to degrade her in his mind, to feel superior. Joe also hates taller girls, he's an insecure man. He doesn't need love or a relationship, Joe needs a lot of therapy and jail (which he got, finally.)

"But why did they have to make a joke out of him? She shot him in the dick!" Joe always was a joke. He lasted 8 seconds in the first season. They started it with a dick joke and they ended it with one; it's perfection. Full circle.

I mean, I get the whole complaining about Bronte and Kate surviving but in the end it was their decision to end the show this way. Is it realistic? No. But if you can ask that, then, please, also ask yourself whether it is realistic for an 'average Joe' to manage to kill that many innocent people without being caught. The answer is; no.

Conclusion: The show may be fictional but the topics/subjects addressed are part of our reality. It is an appeal to our society.

[gor3sigil]

I had a session with my therapist and I was talking about traumas and wrapped up by saying: "Sometimes it's very hard to be a trans man with female rage". And she looked at me and asked what I meant. I explained that the sexual traumas, having to take over chores because I was the "woman of the house" after my mom left, yada yada, all that was because I was a girl and it was hard to deal with and grieve while transitionning.

And she was like: "Have you ever thought that your trauma is genderless ? I'm not looking to invalidate what you feel, I totally see how being assigned female and treated and perceived as one played a role, but when I think back at how your brother was treated by your parents and his peers, do you see that much difference ?"

I was simple. But it shattered a lot of the way I viewed my past, my self etc. Because she was RIGHT. And listen, it may only apply to me but she was right. My brother, though differently, went through the same traumas as me. He was sexually harassed too, dehumanized too, physically abused, mentally abused, went through bullying etc.

We went through the same hardships, same addictions.

It kind of changed my brain chemistry, ngl.

[the-barefoot-hatter]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/65543485

Relationships:

Bill Cipher & Stan Pines, Bill Cipher & Ford Pines, Bill Cipher/Ford Pines (Implied)

Characters:

Bill Cipher, Stan Pines, Ford Pines

Additional Tags:

Blind Bill Cipher, Post-Theraprism Bill Cipher, Bill Cipher is Trying, Bill Cipher Has Issues, Bill Cipher Needs a Hug, Bill Cipher Needs a Freaking Drink, Drinking to Cope, Drinking & Talking, Excessive Drinking, nightmares (implied), Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism (alluded to), Comfort, Hangover, relationship status: softening up, Literal Sleeping Together, Childhood Medical Trauma

drink the poison down

Summary:

Bill's eye doesn’t work. His mouth works just fine. So he puts it to work, taking care of the Mystery Shack's mysterious supply of rotgut, to drown out the bad feelings. AKA, Bill tries to drink his troubles away, and gets some surprisingly good company in the form of the Stan twins. (Blind Bill AU, Stan and Bill are on decent terms, Ford is getting there)

[lovestarvedcupid]

Funny how u think Tumblr is endo safe. Outside of that endo fucker community of yours everyone hates you guys. You aren't real, your just fakers who thinks is okay to say you have a disorder when it requires trauma.

HATE ANON YOUR BACK OH YOUR BACK I MISSED YOU SO NEVER LEAVE ME AGAIN HATE ANON, WE'RE TOGETHER FOREVER OKAY? YOU CAN HATE ME TILL WE BOTH ROT AND DIE, I LOVE YOU HATE ANON LETS GET MARRIED LETS MAKEOUT LETS HAVE SEX OH PLEASE OH PLEASE OH oh oh I'm being told by my non real headmates that we have to hide our forbidden love hate anon, 😔 if the others know... Our reputations will be ruined.... Is that why you're so cold to me hate anon? When behind closed doors we have the most glorious endo-fucking any endo-fuckers can have. I say we no longer hide hate anon, lets show our true enemy's to lovers selves ❤️ lets be free LETS BE FREE

[werewolveswithnightmares]

[trauma-culture-is-blog]

trauma culture is knowing whenever someone is upset because that is something you needed to learn to keep yourself safe

- 👁🌌

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[aprocessionofthoughts]

Memory

whumptoer24 day 15- childhood trauma fandom- dp x dc tw- neglect, implied torture summary- Danny remembers so much, he wishes he could forget so much more

masterlist ao3 part 5 of TFR

Danny remembers that when he was little, his parents were more involved in their lives. He can remember his father swinging him around and his mother holding his hand as they walked through the park. He can remember going to the playground and playing hide and seek with Jazz and their parents. He remembers family meals and playing board games. He remembers hugs and kisses and being tucked into bed. He remembers bedtime stories and his mother singing while she cooked, and his dad telling terrible jokes. He remembers being loved.

But he also remembers Jazz standing on a step stool as she tried to cook mac ’n cheese. He remembers walking to school in the snow with Jazz. They are already late, they waited too long for their parents. He remembers being hungry when there wasn’t food in the house. He remembers not seeing his parents all day. He remembers sneaking down the basement stairs to ask his mom to read him a bedtime story. He remembers how she scowled at him and told him to go to his room, that they were busy. He remembers Jazz telling him bedtime stories and tucking him in. He remembers Jazz taking him to the park, and doing odd chores for neighbors so she could buy some groceries so they’d have food to eat. He remembers her hugs and how she’d hold him close and kiss his forehead and tell him that she loved him.

He remembers being loved. He remembers being lonely. He remembers wishing his parents would pay him more attention. He remembers feeling selfish that he wished for their attention when they told him they were doing important work that will help the whole world.

He remembers growing up not knowing if today he would be loved or ignored. He remembers Jazz’s steadfastness.

But he remembers when his parents spent more time downstairs than upstairs except to sleep. Things changed then. His parents were no longer geniuses who were trying to save the world. He remembers when he stopped fighting his classmates who said his parents were crazy. He remembers bitterly thinking that they might be.

He remembers his parents forgetting to pick him up from school or from friends’ houses. He remembers them accidentally locking him and Jazz out of the house, and they were too afraid of what would happen if they broke a window so they slept outside.

He remembers that he ran away once. He took his backpack stuffed with clothes and a few granola bars and his stuffed rabbit. Instead of walking to school he went into the small woods near Amity, thinking that he could live with the animals like the characters in his stories.

He remembers getting lost, being cold, being hungry, being scared of every little noise. He remembers crying out for his parents, hoping that they’d rescue him. He remembers finally stumbling out of the woods and making his way home. It was dark already, and when he stumbled inside Jazz was there, crying and pulling him into her arms. His parents hadn’t noticed.

And then the portal opened. And everything changed but nothing really did.

His parents were obsessed, they had been right, ghosts were real.

There was never food in the house now. Not unless he or jazz brought it in. When his parents noticed they complaid and said he and Jazz had to start ‘pulling their own weight.’ They didn’t realize that jazz worked hard to try and pay the bills that accumulated and that Danny had started taking care of neighbors’ yards when he could to try and help put food on the table. It wasn’t consistent. It couldn’t be, not with ghost fights and escaping his parents.

And it was hard, but a year went by and he was getting the hang of it.

Then they found out and everything spiraled.

He tries not to remember the looks on their faces. He tries not to remember the cold metal table and scalpels laced with ectoranium. He tries not to remember them shoving Jazz when she tried to free him, then locking her in a cage ‘for her own good.’ He tries not to remember Sam and Tucker bursting in and fighting his parents. He tries not to remember them stitching him back up after they’d knocked his parents out. He tries not to remember Sam shoving a credit card into his hand and telling him and Jazz to run.

He remembers so many things. He wishes he could forget so many more.

[alice-the-demon]

(CW: blood, implied abuse from parental figure)

2 - You deserved it

[huntquinlan]

it’s honestly a shame that sjm is not an author who deals in allegory or is an author who would be able to tactfully write this because i honestly feel like azriel’s scars are such a missed opportunity. i’m putting this under a read more because the topic is sensitive and will be tagged accordingly.

while azriel’s burn scars in canon serve as a physical representation and reminder of the abuse he survived from his father and brothers, when i was reflecting on them and azriel’s own complex relationship with his romantic life and sexuality i realized that if the author of acotar was anyone other than sjm azriel’s scars could easily be read as symbolic representations of trauma from csa. it comes down to them being on his hands as well, hands so often being the conduit by which any type of physical intimacy is initiated.

i think this interpretation is strengthened by azriel’s aversion to fire while fire has been associated with incredibly passionate sex in universe (“fire in his blood and fucks like it too”).

what it ultimately comes down to, for me, is azriel’s centuries long obsession with mor. which comes off as incredibly comphet and strange until the eris reveal, which brings to light the incredibly charged relationship between eris and azriel. and it leads me to wonder how much of it really is mor, if it’s not just the safety of the idea of her to cover what azriel really desires because he’s functionally unable to process that.

not only are the illyrians written as incredibly traditional, but there is no indication given they are accepting of same sex attraction. azriel, who suffered so extremely at the hands of his father and brothers, that he still bares the physical burn scars to his hands, having any attraction to the heir of autumn, practically the crown prince of fire, would be incomprehensible to azriel’s mind. and any part of him that did comprehend it would be terrified and probably ashamed.

eris, of course, represents everything azriel fears and despises. but more importantly, he is the opportunity for azriel to heal from past traumas and fully accept himself and his sexuality.

this interpretation doesn’t negate the possibility for ‘kinky’ azriel either. since everyone seems to be preoccupied with whether he can be a leather dom daddy or not. frankly, any sort of bdsm practice would offer azriel a sort of distance during intimacy (depending on the act and his role) but above all else, enthusiastic and clear consent.

[xxcontractdemonxx]

⋆｡‧˚𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪˚‧｡⋆

Strange how parents get mad at suicidal kids.

Like, I can take your child (myself) away from you forever and traumatize you just like you have to me just like 🫰 that. It's not that I think you love me, it's that you love the idea of having me as a child.

[namesareweird579]

Polar Vortex‘s lore part 1: the ice kingdom

[dragon-queen21]

Could I maybe ask for a promt about baby regressor Hawks getting too little sleep and too stressed out and regressing/ having a total crying fit infront of dabi, who then takes hawks to his penthouse and takes care of him for the night? [Stuff like making him food, getting him a bottle and pacifier, brushing his teeth and helping him into comfy pajamas and a diaper for the night so he can get enough sleep. Essentially comforting and making the sure the baby is ok and taken care of because he 'totally' doesn't care [he does]. Please and thank you!

Hi hi! I just took this as making specific headcanons (which I do really enjoy doing) instead of as 'prompts' because I didn't really know how to accomplish that. Also I wrote this in the middle of class so if there are any errors that's why :P

~~~

~I feel like being sleep deprived makes Hawks so much clingier than usual, and a lot more open to about what he’s actually feeling. While that sometimes leads to a lot of sleepy rambles and very happy little chirps that Hawks would never allow himself to make otherwise, it also leads to a lot of trauma dumping without being quite aware of what he’s saying

~It definitely takes Dabi by surprise when their little undercover spy is admitting to reasons that are actually very valid as to why he wants to join the league and starts sobbing over something that Dabi can vaguely put together.

~Dabi having the internal debate on whether to bring Hawks back to the lov’s hideout when he finds the hero regressed in his apartment. Because Hawk’s ‘home’ is less like a home and more like a prison. Really birdie, how do you live here and not go stir crazy?

~Making a pillow fort (it’s a nest really, but at the blatant suggestion Hawks had a panic attack and it took Dabi a whole hour to convince him that, pillow forts are fine. Kids make them all the time. Well screw it, now he wants to make one himself, so even if Hawks doesn’t want to join he’s going to make one anyways just to spite the bird.

~Getting Kurogiri to warp them items because again, there is hardly anything in Hawk’s apartment, let alone to be able to take care of such a small little.

~ “We’ve really got to talk about your work schedule little bird”

~I want to say that Dabi manages to get Hawks to go to bed immediately after getting him to eat a proper meal, but you know when your so tired it’s like you can’t sleep because now your over tired? Yeah, that horrible experience. Mix in anxiety and the left over adrenaline from going none stop for the past week and you get a very miserable little bird who really does want to sleep and just can’t.

~A warm glass of milk being bottle fed to the regressor is what Dabi swears should put him to sleep (and if he added some sort of sleep aid in along with vanilla, well Hawks doesn’t need to know that if it works. Meanwhile Dabi just rambles to the regressor, petting his wings and hair and Dabi doesn’t know exactly when, but eventually Hawks just crashes.

~Somehow Toga has pictures of the two of them cuddled up and sleeping next to each other so now she has blackmail material to use on Dabi for the next week or so