#im so mad. hes so stupid and mean
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arguing with my brother about our late moms photos and hes telling me not to take any of her stuff with me when i move and im like im only taking my baby photos the ones with my name on them and honest to god he said "you didnt even take those photos"......MY BABY PHOTOS? I WAS A BABY
#now im definitely taking her like kitchen decorations sorry you were rude to me now *I* get a hot dog#not sure why he thinks he gets to own both the house and all of her things and take her money from me pretty sure i can take whatever the#fuck i want to that sad little hoarder its all just like...end table stuff like nothing precious#im so mad. hes so stupid and mean#(carrying bags of her stuff like im in pretty woman) big mistake. HUGE.
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number #1 tactic that people use to not sound as racist as they are when they talk to black people: 'uhh so you AMERICANS need to stop pretending everything is about YOU. why should i know this im not from the us :/' (= is talking about like. a phenomenally internationally well-known black artist)
#myposts#kendrick lamar#drake#i updated it from 'white europeans' to 'people' because some people pointed out that 'gringo' is probably more south american lingo#but the point i wanted to make is like. there is this subset of european people (quite a lot of them)#who try to deflect by saying them not knowing these things isn't because of an active lack of disinterest in black culture and influences#and like. them not knowing who a certain black person is is never an educational failing on their side of any sorts#but instead are pretending that like. they are by virtue of being european always correctly educated on What History And Art Is Important#like. 2 months back that one post pretending that 'us europeans dont need to know all your AMERICAN writers 🙄' talking about james baldwin?#like just because that person didnt know who james baldwin was#they immediately were mad at the implication that They Didn't Know Someone Of Cultural Significance#and twisted it into 'well he cant be that important by virtue of me not knowing him'#like completely ignoring that the european school system also has. race problems and also ignoring that he lived and wrote in France too#but like. its this really racist defence mechanism of like. 'well you stupid americans always make everything about yourselves'#i hope i make sense i didnt think this would blow up lol#and like some people in the notes of that post were so smug about not knowing who Kendrick Lamar is#bc to them thats like 'oh im too cultured to be listening to rap of any sorts' like completely dismissing his music as kind of second class#by virtue of it being rap and black music and him not being in the White Mainstream as much as other musicians#(i mean hes still like 24th most listened artist worldwide but you get what i mean)
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I hate the stretch lines in the front of Curly's uniform because that means the devs rushed to make a model in like a month or so and thought "They gotta at least know he has huge knockers, gotta know he's got back pain." Cause like what is the thematic importance of his tits having overhang?
What responsibility is that representing? Breast reduction? It shows an inherent greed in his character due to the excess and heshouldletmeholdone and that he clearly is blinded cause if he tries to look down his damn ladder all he's seeing is his own cleavage.
#this is my curly slander post ig#disclaimer i need you to understand i see all fictional men i like as like butches Curly is no exception#but like they didnt need to add that many polygons to his chest like its unnessary and honestly a little mean he already has so many things#to handle and you expect him to hold those boys up like that just aint right this is like something so stupid but i know you can tell im#having strong feelings about it cause like what was the point why did they survive the fucking crash it has to be a injoke at this point#with the devs it shouldnt make me this mad im turning into a misandrist but only towards large chested men#mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#shitpost#suggestive#ig because this is just about his chest but like also they made him objectively pretty for no reason like yeah like ideal man and work ig#but they went over the extra mile like i have a right to be mad they did that much for a model we see canonically for like two seconds its#crazy actually how little we see of curly pre crash because we also lose his physical movements to help characterize him the way we see#body language with the other characters and how it gives way to their struggles and personalities and sentiments in certain moments#like all he does and how he emotes is stifled by the fact we always play as him until the last moments where he takes over to try and save#the ship and crew and even right before that the scene is so wrought with tension we cant tell what that look he gave Jimmy meant due to#the limitations of the models and how stiff Curly is like was it fear acceptance denial we dont know enought about how he acts himself#to tell and then everything else is charaterized by what Jimmy had done to where we dont really just get to see Curly as himself like Anya#and Swansea and Daisuke we have no idea how theyd act in a regular moment outside of a few glimpses and even then it is them doing#their jobs like grrrr we hate an unreliable narrator but also its the fact jimmy clearly does not interact with them or try to outside of#his position as copilot and then captain harkening back to the entire capitlist view of utility and how he views all of them as useless eve#Curly which fandom tangent the fandom also tends to do to Curly as they base every trait on what they think he failed to do as Captain#between Jimmy and Anya when the QnAs kinda make him out to be a rather open and willing person but still someone who isnt like a push over#just thinking of QnA three where it mentions hes very open to trying new things and you need to be an open minded person to open urself up#to failure like that and ig this is just the weird view that Curly needs to learn that or that theres redemption he needs personality wise#verses healing and learning from trauma like idk its the idea that people assume he did abosultely nothing when the games points out direct#and throught parallels he was taking actions its just wasnt enough and an over focus on absolute inaction vs ineffective methods used to#tackle the issues and themes the game grapples with plus wanting someone to take the blame and have to make it up to Anya even tho#i think it would mean nothing from Curly because she saw his efforts and would be disappointed it wasnt enough but the idea she would#disregard the attempts or not acknoweldge Jimmy as the epicenter compared ot Curly is weird and too focused on someone
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I was thinking on when Steve lost Bucky for the 3rd time (1st when he was drafted, 2nd when he was told he was MIA, 3rd when he fell) he tried to get drunk to forget, right? If he did that then...
What did he do when he lost him for the 6th time? (4th when he escaped, 5th when Bucky was in cryo, 6th the snap)
I mean technically Bucky died twice, but Steve lost him six times already.
And of he tried to get blind drunk once of those times- did he self-harm in other ways too?
To dull the pain? He can't get drunk, he heals quickly, he can't die easily either, so what did he do?
He wouldn't want to die when he knows for a fact that Bucky is alive ofc, but I can't see him acting normally or without a little bit of reckless energy.
To dull the pain and disappoinment (he can't feel like that, that's Bucky's choice -Cryo-. But how it hurts him tho).
(unrelated to this line of thought but it is relevant to the idea regardless)
That's why I can't fathom the idea of Steve abandoning Bucky in endgame.
He lost him 6 six (6) times already and he just... Went away? To a woman he only kissed once? After all he did for him, the pain and loss?
Even if you don't ship them, you have to think that to be really ooc on Steve's part. Everything in his character arc in the MCU is related to Bucky (and loss). Yes he liked Peggy, but he didn't suffer nor mourn her the same way he mourned Bucky (She was alive, but had dementia and was also very old, and had her own life).
His feelings for Peggy were more a "what if" and lost possibilities than anything.
She was an idea, a fantasy (that's why Wanda used that when fighting with him, right?). Not something real.
He wanted to be with her, but he didn't really knew her or love her (at least I don't think so).
She was the first woman that saw him for him after all. Before everything. But that's it.
He liked her for that (and her strong personality too) but did he love her? He didn't try to get on dates after he was defrosted because he knew people would only see Captain America, not Steve Rogers. He needed to represent an ideal and knew no one would understand (the pain, loss) and have the patience to be with him. That’s why he also highlighted the shared life experience thing.
So she was comforting, reassuring in a toxic and unhealthy kind of way (memories and fantasy aren't healthy when used like that). But still a what if and lost opportunity. He had to let her go at one point. And he did(!) But they had to fuck it up…
I mean... it's the same thing when you're still hung up on an ex. You want to think of the possibilities, the what ifs, the "what could have been" But when you go back to them nothing is like you remembered, nothing is like you wanted and you are dissatisfied and disappointed.
(Because all of that was in your head, it wasn't real).
And besides, he knew she had a life of her own (a fulfilling one at that) so what, he was selfish enough to fuck that up too? Without helping HIM? Without saving HIM? Abandoning HIM? After just being brought to life? After grieving him for another five years? Bucky was his best friend, his companion, his best pal…
He wouldn't do that to him. He would die before hurting Bucky (as they already stablished for most of the fucking movies) He even was like “You don’t understand” when Peggy talked to him in the bars ruins.
I think in canon (not ooc/EG)Steve would entertain the idea, but would decide to just keep it as that: An idea, a fantasy. And move on like he already did before.
Also the idea that it was a Peggy from an alternative universe is flawed because he abandoned HIS Bucky, even if in the other universe he helped or whatever.
In HIS UNIVERSE he abandoned his best friend? Not believable. And the logic of “oh it didn’t change their timeline because it was another one” is also stupid.
They already fucked up with Steve fighting 2012!Steve and also telling him about Bucky (creating another universe more than likely). And they were supposed to be undetected. Not create new universes. Thats also why I’m so keen on the idea of Steve being in a prison or something. He already fucked up once, twice if you think he went to the past to stay.
How can he be free while fucking up the timelines? Yeah, nah.
Also… they implied Steve can’t age in a movie if I remember correctly…. How did he become old?
And the idea that he went to Peggy because “Tony told him to have a life outside of captain america” is fucked up. So what? He relates his Bucky’s existence with work? FUCK OFF. Endgame Steve is fucked up and the worst character assassination I’ve ever seen.
They were just too annoyed with the fans because we ship Stucky (even tho they used that to promote the movies in panels and stuff, hypocrites -I remember clearly the producers? of the movie talk about gay characters and the actors talk about Stucky in those panels for then…be one of the russos in like 1 second and have that shit ass, fuck ass ending for Steve and Bucky. That shit was vile-).
im also annoyed with some people that now shit on Steve when umh… did you see the movies? The other movies? Not only Endgame? (Btw the only one that got a “good ending” was Tony because he died as a hero in front of everyone -even tho he didn’t want to help at first because he had a good life, the ONLY ONE OF THEM might I add-, everyone else got worse, is dead or they’re neglected and treated as haha funny character or haha funny moment)
Im all for ships and ideas and headcanons (even when I hate them with passion, you do you) but don’t try and use this character assassination as an excuse to shit on Steve. If you NEED to shit on a character for your ship to work, then you’re not doing a good job at it or your ship sucks. Idk what to tell you.
#steve rogers#im rambling about Captain America and the stupidity of Endgame#anti endgame#mcu#marvel mcu#ramblings#im rambling bc Im pissed off#i wrote this on twt originally#but I expanded it on here#stucky#endgame isnt canon in this house#Tbh im also mad at the idea of Tnoy being selfless or a hero for dying#he didn’t want to help bc HIS life was good#and of course he had to get the only good ending out of everyone lmao#even Natasha was neglected#endgame is so fucked up man#I fucking hate the ending so bad#you dont understand#also I dislike Tony because they always always try to make him more likeble by omitting info (like in the accords)#or putting a kid in front of him and saying see he’s doing it for the kids benefit!#like no the accords would have fucked up with Peters life too#and Morgan was only there to make them not go back in time bc the fucker abandoned his kid anyway#by dying but you know#he needed to die a hero#gimme a break and now RDJ is back in the mcu#idk Im really not a hater of Tony but I dislike when they try too hard to make him likeble#hes an asshole deal with it#dislexia hates me rlly bad and im not going to correct the tags but you get the idea#i had to edit this bc I realized that Steve actually lost bucky 6 times#i mean technically
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'The Duke of Norfolk, speaking privately to the captain of the guard, told him to secretly arrest the Secretary after dinner, as they were going into the Council, and to take him to the Tower. The captain wondered very much at this, but the Duke said to him, 'You need not be surprised. The King orders it.'
As usual, they all went to the Parliament at Westminster, and when they came out and were going to the palace to dinner, the wind blew off the Secretary’s bonnet, and it fell on the ground. The custom of the country is, when a gentleman loses his bonnet, for all those who are with him to doff theirs, but on this occasion, when Cromwell’s bonnet blew off, all the other gentlemen kept theirs on their heads, which being noticed by him, he said, 'A high wind indeed must it have been to blow my bonnet off and keep all yours on.' They pretended not to hear what he said, and Cromwell took it for a bad omen.
They went to the palace and dined, and all the while they were dining the gentlemen did not converse with the Secretary, as they were wont to do, and as soon as they had finished all the gentlemen went to the Council-chamber. It was the Secretary’s habit always after dinner to go close up to a window to hear the petitioners; and when the gentlemen had gone to the Council-chamber, the Secretary remained at his window as usual for about an hour, and then joined the other gentlemen; and finding them all seated, he said, 'You were in a great hurry, gentlemen, to get seated.' The chair where he was in the habit of sitting was vacant, and the gentlemen made no answer to his remark; but just as he was going to sit down the Duke of Norfolk said, 'Cromwell, do not sit there; that is no place for thee. Traitors do not sit amongst gentlemen.'
Chronicle of King Henry VIII. of England being a contemporary record of some of the principle events of the reigns of Henry VIII and Edward VI
#this is the spanish chronicle so hardly a leading light in terms of accuracy but there you are#thomas cromwell#wolf hall#ive said it before i'll say it again#because im an eejit for the longest time i couldnt figure out what 'high wind' was supposed to mean. i was genuinely so confused#then i realised it was just literal. w the implication simply being he was taller than the others#and then i felt mad stupid
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abduction/ambush concept for good ol' agent kennedy..... ->
leon catches someone taking his picture. it's a creepshot for sure, but with his line of work.... he can't be too careful now.
immediately he can tell his young woman knows she's been caught, and immediately he tries to get a feel for the situation.
she's embarrassed. she's looking away. and leon's.... not so sure about it. so, he makes his way over nonchalantly.
this woman is sat by the exit of this truckstop restaurant, by the trashcans and such. leon tries to avoid bluntly intimidating her by steering clear and throwing his stuff away. only to gently throw a comment her way, one that's meant to be playful and now blunt, but quiet to avoid drawing attention to her.
if this woman is just being creepy, he doesn't exactly want to embarrass her. she looks fresh into college and, while an adult shouldn't be acting like this.... maybe he wants to give her the benefit of the doubt, yknow?
he comments, something along the lines of, "not who you think i am, but i'm flattered. coulda just asked next time." a way to ease any tension with a joke.
and quickly, she's apologetic. "it was for a friend, i'm sorry," etc etc.
leon kinda feels bad. for the most part, he was worried less about some random girl taking creepshots and more of espionage and assassination attempts. if she's just some weirdo, then he can try to be nice at least? make the world a better place by confronting a creep and hopefully changing their ways lol.
in the best way he can, he just puts it light and asks her to not do that again. steer her on the right path.
but aha! that is the trick! while she wasn't interested in him (or maybe she plans to NOT delete that image after sending it to the sketch number she was given ahah), she was interested in the money she was paid to take photos and then lie to him if she was caught. hell, she IS a broke college student. what's wrong with sacrificing her dignity for a couple hundred bucks?
classic, "use an innocent looking young woman/kid to keep the target's guard down as a red herring!"
he might be a little weirded out on his way out, but he's more distracted by social anxiety to notice the ambush.
bonus points if this woman somehow becomes actually involved when, whoops, her desperation led her to witness this man's kidnapping and... oh god she just wants to eat something better than ramen, dude. fuck, man. shit. oh no. oh god.
and boy, is she in for a surprise when it's not just some random handsome guy getting abducted. not some poor fucker caught up in crime, or someone who owes money. ..
it's a fucking government agent involved with stopping bioterrorism. she's in deep...
#leon whump ideas#whump#this uh... yknow this was semi-inspired by an actual assassination by proxy (i think is the term)#in which some random woman were hired to play a prank -> tricked into killing#as i was writing it just got deeper and deeper into plot#the idea of this poor girl blaming herself and now leon's gotta help her#but i like to imagine while he's mad he's not really too bent outta shape into regards of her situation#like damn capitalism is rough but that was stupid lmfao#i wanna imagine leon's not gonna be too mad unless someone's actions gets someone killed (vendetta where he's really to be brutal)#he seems to wanna see good in people while also being a reasonable person/not downplaying someone's actions?#do i read that right about him idk#i wanna imagine leon's good at analyzing behavior/understanding the human condition#she's gotta eat -> does something bad -> definitely didnt realize the shit she'd get into#he sees the best in people first and also wont hesitate to deal with true evil and greed kinda thing#i mean he'll sacrifice himself for someone he barely knows so i think im at least closse#look im insecure about misreading characters/lore lol
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...the "nothing happened" scene has caused my brain to latch on to zoro with a vice grip. send help.
#this pathetic commited hard shell hiding inner softness little cunt! i hate him i hate him so much im so mad im so fucking just. just.#he does not believe in anything above his goals. until he believes in his crew that is. and people are fragile things and they mean#SO much to him it makes me sick he makes me sick fucking moss-head little bitch.#& like the way it recontextualizes zoro's priorities makes his behaviour in the previous saga hit so much harder... losing my mind.#absolutley losing my mind.#... fuck i think i'm a little in love with him.#AND HE DIDN'T LET SANJI DO IT! HE COULD HAVE! you could bring up honour but zoro only cares about that as a SWORDSMAN.#& like tbh thematically speaking it's reductive to say it pertains to whether sanji would be “strong enough” especially when considering ho#much op decries needlessly given sacrifice wholesale. it wasn't about that. these are people zoro cares about & he doesn't want to lose#them. he won't sellout luffy for the crew & he won't let anyone else make that choice & he won't let luffy know he did it. he's#committed to being the world's greatest swordsman but first & foremost he is committed to his CREW. to the group of strays he loves!#& just the throughlines of fear & commitment w zoro... & the forced question of what is strength when faced with the loss of those you love#hands are fucking shaking absolutley fucking losing my mind.#this stupid fucking lug of meat.#HE MADE ME FUCKING CRY.#oh god the way it reframes him swearing to luffy to never lose again after the duel w mihawk... the subtle character development. cryin..#roronoa zoro#grey's one piece tag
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came across this vaguepost about me & it along with this reply someone else left on it is like . a double KO of things that annoy me . its not even because its vagueing me theyre just bad fucking takes😭
#like its fine if u dont view them that way or if ur not comfortable with it but saying that ppl should never view ANY media through a#''non-incestuous lens'' is so stupid . pick up a book or something . & i KNOW me pointing out incest subtext between connor & zoe isnt#just me bc ive seen multiple other ppl point out the incestuous undertones of the story . including ppl who dislike deh bringing it up as#''criticism'' bc it weirded them out or whatever#also ''connor sort of treated her like shit'' u mean he abused her . he abused zoe . please stop trying to fucking woobify him😭#& most of the subtext doesnt even come from him its from zoe#like im not Mad at these ppl bc i dont know them but like . come on man#normal mutuals look away
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Sometimes I like applying real world metatext to in universe explanations for things going on too. Kind of mix canon with metatext. In universe explanations for Eilistraee's church getting more attention after The Incident (spellplague) being her and Vhaeraun's begrudging alliance and her purposeful attempts to keep lolth's attention on her. Or something like that.
#its something im turning around in my head a lot.#the beautiful thing about dnd is that you can world build however you want.#he would be so mad about this by the way.#(trying not to name drop them so it doesnt appear in the tags so sorry about the vagueness)#i do like the implication that ellistr punching raun really hard got him to begrudgingly respect her a little more#and i mean. taking over the aspects and the mashing of followers probably also helped but#on an innerpersonal level. do you think hes stupid enough that all she had to do was kick him in the balls hard enough and he was like#hmmm. i guess we can work together.
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nightwing year one 🤝 gotham knights 43 reading goes like idonotseeit idonotseeit hehe yaaaay jason being cute with dick and/or barbara ^_^ ^_^ idonotseeit idonotseeit idonotseeit
#having Barbara of all people tell the grieving father that he wasnt actually a father was FOUL#tbh theres so much to get mad about re barbara in that issue im going to bite someone#it wasnt a good issue for anyone but this moment was. particularly egregious#and like. ugh. its double stupid bc its kiiiinda like shes trying to comfort him by saying itd be worse if jason actually was his son?#(that exchange i mean. the rest of the issue is like frequently Wrong but not incoherent.)#but its like. she is herself an adoptee with strong feelints about it & she would not fucking say that#(or like if you want me to believe she did she wouldnt have said it LIKE THAT)#dc
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god i need straight ppl to be fuckin normal abt gay intimacy like right now
#for doa just in case bc ik hes uncomfy with it ill tag it#heartstopper#heartstopper ment#OKAY ONTO MY RANT#a new heartstopper webcomic update dropped the other day and im SOOOO#it was good!!! like it was sweet i have no problem with the actual material#its just how ppl perceived it that makes me wanna explode#its intimate near the end and everyones like 'OH NO LOOK AT THEM THATS CRAZY CALM IT DOWN'#THEYRE FUCKING TEENAGERS U NUMBSKULL#I THINK TWO TEENAGERS KISSING IS THE LEAST OF UR FUCKIN WORRIES#it makes me so mad. bc no one freaks out this much over straight ppl being intimate.#yes heartstopper is the more 'innocent and cheesy' gay media which makes it easier for straight ppl to digest#which also just means that they'll flip tf out as soon as anything other than fluff is brought up#theyre teenagers in love of course theyre gonna be fuckin curious man its so stupid#u fuckers freak the hell out when they make out but then turn around and watch whatever trendy straight romcom is popular and its even wors#i am livid. please stop thinking that gay ppl can either be completely repulsed or completely obsessed with sex.#its fucking natural#god i hope this makes sense pls give me ur thoughts on this i wanna know what other ppl think abt this too
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☕ fanfiction
literally was at work for 12 yrs and so fucking busy that i forgot to answer this and my phone only fell to 78% OOPSIE
I simultaneously think fanfic is fun and people should write even if its silly or bad........... and i am a huge hater and extremely picky when i am the reader 💀 you have the right to interpret a character however u want and i have the right to think it sucks ass and balls
#there are so many fics i mostly like but a minor detail or two make me so MAD#first one that springs to mind is a very cute and in character one abt post canon rankane#that was great up until the final chapter#when ranma tells her he thinks he might have a crush on her#i was like H U H ????????#what do you fucking Mean.#too many people think ranma genuinely doesnt know he has feelings for her#meanwhile im over here like not only does he know but he also absolutely knows she loves him too#hes stupid and irrationally afraid abt admitting it but when push comes to shove ranma WILL admit she's his girlfriend
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haven’t been on much bc my dog has been sick :( between seizures and an infected tooth we’ve been having a Time trying to get everything fixed (this started around the holidays so our vet has been very booked up…we have been like 3-4 times in the past 4-5 weeks OTL does not help it’s like an hour drive there, so that’s been exhausting) now his new seizure meds are making him sick (was hoping it was like, just an adjustment period thing but he’s been sick for a week and having concerning symptoms…) if I’m not on a ton or slow to replying to messages it’s bc I’m working as much overtime as my job will give me bc Vet Expensive and mentally drained obvi 😞
#it makes me a lil mad his meds were kinda pricy and they literally are making things worse. like sure he isn’t have seizures but he can#barely walk and keeps running into things and keeps having diarrhea so like. 🙃 and the meds are making him sooo hungry and thirsty#I’m seeing the vet AGAIN FRIDAY I know she’s so sick of me but man my little guy. if she can’t figure out a combo that doesn’t have such#bad side effects I’m literally going to scream and cry#he’s the most sensitive boy in the world and my mental health hangs on his and my cats well being. please. 😭#sanchoyorambles#I’ve also called them like twice to find out if I should stop or what they want me to do and keep getting ‘oh they���ll call u back’ WHEN#GIRL MY PUBBY#if I don’t hear back before his next dose I’m just gonna make an executive decision myself to stop them for now#he’s literally on the smallest possible dose too bc he’s so little. so. they can’t go down in dosage they’ll need to put him on smth else 😑#which means paying for ANOTHER PRESCRIPTION A WEEK AFTER ALREASY GETTING ONE THAT WAS $30 ON TOP OF HIS STUPID VET BILL#screaming.#and like if I have the money it’s fine. and it’s not like the vet could’ve known he’d have bad side effects#im just frustrated it’s no one’s fault#I could go to a closer vet. the thing is I LIKE the one further away#they have the only groomer I’ve found that can trim him without sedating him! they send me reminders abt his shots! I like the vibes!!!#they seem caring!! but they are always SOOO BUSY it takes forever to make appointments or to hear back from them 😭#remember how I said one of my goals was to buy a vechicle this year lmao the vet bills are draining any savings I’ve managed to build up 🤧#my pets are priority 1 tho like even before all the medical stuff /I/ need like lol… that’s my baby#it’s just really bad timing. not that there’s good timing for medical issues but. u know
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i feel sick <- thinking about alex
#dude i genuinely dont care how reckless stupid or ignorant he is#i hate anyone who says mean shit to him bc its always founded on the idea that hes the headmage.#so OFCOURSE he should know all this stuff#WELL HES 16. AND HES JUST LOST SO MANY PEOPLE ALL AT ONCE HES TIRED AND SAD#OH MY GOOODDDD DONT EVEN TALK TO ME#im so mad#like im actually way too angry about this but idc#its sooo personal#tzu rambles
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#SORRY im mad about my stupid college again#WHY do they require so many internhip hours??????#no wait i KNOW why. bc the chef who runs the program is EVIL AND STUPID#he literally thinks he as a chef is gods gift to this earth. he thinks CHEFS are gods gift to this earth but only if they agree with him.#however. gods gift to this earth do NOT deserve breaks. ('chefs dont get breaks' is a direct quote)#he thinks all chefs should work like dogs and SUFFER. and the industry should never change#and he loves the power of being the program head. (and most students' advisor)#and he can say im preparing you to be the best!!!!! and get away with it#and he doesnt respect pastry chefs. and guess what i am hahahah#like i know the culinary industry is toxic and most chefs are jerks. but bakeries are very different from restaurants#so i thought i could handle some jerky chefs during school and get my degree and go work in a bakery#(i can handle some jerky chefs)#the problem was that a jerky chef ran the program as if you were already working in the worst restaurant environment imaginable#and he only taught like everyone wanted to be world renown chefs of 5 star parisian restaurants that take 4 years to get a reservation#(which is crazy that he thinks hes qualified to get other people to that level but ok.)#and thats great for people who want that! but some people (me) just want a cute little bakery!#also ! its advertised as a 2 year associates program#which. is true that you'll only get an associates degree out of it#but 2 years is including summer semesters. sorry i don't think thats how that works. i think thats 3 years#2 years for people who decide to do extra and take summer semesters.#and i think the only realistic way to complete the internship hours is to take an off semester and only do the internship#so you're not doing it at the same time as classes#but that adds a minimum of 1 semester and maximum 2#or if you cram the spring and fall semesters to have summer off and do the internship during summer#summer semesters are shorter. so youd have less weeks to complete the same amount of hours#it is simply not a 2 year program for the average person!!!!!!#i was IN COLLEGE FOR 2 YEARS!!!!!! AND I ONLY TOOK 1 (ONE) PASTRY CLASS!!!!!! I SHOULD'VE BEEN ABLE TO GRADUATE!!!!!!!!!!!#and what do you MEAN you expect me to be in college for 3 years and only get an associates degree out of it. no thank you#its almost like...... an associates degree requires 2 years of schooling........ and theres too much happening in this program.......#bc the man in charge of it is power hungry and wants to control people and thinks chefs need to be beat into shape.......
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i’m so grumpy recently ugh
#sigh. turning 28 isn’t getting off to a good start#accidentally clipped the bumper of a parked car while driving my in-laws’ good car#now we’re down to one working car out of four cars on our property#and bee’s mom is at the hospital for recurring chronic potassium (pretty typical for her)#which ranges anywhere from overnight to a week or two#sooooo i had to spend $60 on ub*r today#which means i’ll have to spend $150 on rides to work bc of my own fuck up#and the father-in-law’s selfishness (he didn’t drive his wife to infusion#knowing i needed a ride to work a couple hours later and to be picked up later that afternoon)#so i’m grumpy but i can’t do anything about it#my stupid car insurance is going to go up in november and i’m SO not pleased#i’m so mad at myself for such a stupid accident#i get that it’s an accident but ofc it had to happen the day after my birthday (happened on the 10th)#i’m grumpy and way too fucking broke for this#i just moved to a new place last month#not to mention i had a chronic illness flare on friday so not only did i miss work last monday bc of my stupid accident on the previous sat#but i had to miss work on friday (i only work M/W/F)#SOOOOOOO#IM HAVING A FUN TIME GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#:c#h.txt
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