#im shaking so much
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sorry i will cry over paul with you all later but currently i cant stop crying over a certain other tall boy who just accepted my bracelet and was actually probably the sweetest person ever
#im shaking so much#thank god for auto correct#he was so sweet i cant even#im actually crying#what if i faint rn
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IM SO INSANE ABOUT THEM I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!
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i drink caffeine and suddenly i feel like an ant thats gained sentience
#wtf#im shaking so much#i have thoufhts about everything and anything#reason 1 why i def do Not have adhd of all thigns#tea
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LOML OMG SHE KNOWS IM HERE DO YALL THINK SHE SAW MY AMV?!?!?
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on a completely separate note; shizun luo binghe with a disciple shen yuan who fell into the abyss??? *thinks about LBH canonically stealing SQQ's corpse for 5 years* he'd hallucinate i think. like, like visual and audial hallucinations.
Keeps thinking he's seeing SQQ in the corner of his eyes, or wandering between the trees, amongst a group of disciples. Thinks he hears him calling for him, but its just the wind or another disciple.
Gets Xiu Ya reforged but patently fucking refuses to make a sword mound. Because his disciple Is Not Dead :))) There was No Body. He's Not Dead. And If You keep Insisting That He Is, He's Gonna Skewer You :). He's holding onto Xiu Ya so he can return his most favored disciple's sword when he returns. It's on his hip right next to Zheng Yang where it's supposed to be.
Also this motherfucker?? does not sleep btw. He has the image of SQQ, wide eyed and hysterical and standing at the mouth of the abyss burned into his fucking eyelids. Can't use the dreamscape to escape it either because he keeps trying to save him and either he does and it's an incredibly cruel trick to wake up to, or he doesn't and he gets his heart broken in several different pieces again.
There is no convincing this man that Shen Qingqiu is dead. Absolutely nothing at all. He is buried so deep in denial that moles would be jealous of how deep he is. He keeps making tea for two in the bamboo house only to remember that it's just him. SQQ's fans are hiding everywhere, little reminders of his presence. He goes to wake up SQQ on the mornings he sleeps in-- only to find the room empty.
#svsss#luo binghe#svsss au#scum villain#scum villian self saving system#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#disciple shen yuan#lbh. visibly exhausted and with twitchy eyes: im fine :) | everyone else: ho no the fuck you ARENT.#SQQ was hysterical not because he found out LBH was half-demon but bc he was having a long-awaited mental breakdown over his autonomy :)#or (limited) lack thereof. he was having a sudden onset crisis of mortality and was handling at quite literally the WORST time. oops#im thinking very hard that LBH would never push his disciple into the abyss especially with no system to force him to. so SQQ either#had to goad him into it (failing always) or throw himself in. he ended up doing it himself but not before some very impressive hysterics.#BUT ALSO. IF THIS HAD BEEN WHERE SQQ WAS THE HALF-HEAVENLY DEMON INSTEAD IT WOULD'VE BEEN SO GREAT.#and by great i mean horribly angsty bc SQQ is NOT doing too hot and has. in very SY-like fashion. convinced himself that LBH will kill him#when he finds out he's a demon. so when it comes out i have this mental image of him lunging at LBH and LBH flinches back. but SQQ wraps hi#hands around the blade of Zheng Yang and yanks it up so the tip of the blade is digging into his chest where is heart is. LBH can't yank th#sword away without risking slicing into SQQ's hands. SQQ's hair has fallen out of its tail/bun and is now messily spilling down his#back and its NO helping the kinda deranged look he has going on. he's visibly shaking and his eyes keep flittering away and back at LBH's#face. SQQ is looking at the messages from the system warning him that he has to go into the abyss or punishment will occur. he's like.#rambling though. talking about how shizun doesn't *like* unclean things and there is nothing more unclean than a demon. like he is#INSISTING. LBH can't?? get a fucking word in. actually. SY isn't listening that much either anyways. too overwhelmed with the system and#the amount of stress he's under and his crumbling mental state and the innate and primal desire to live even when he's standing in front of#his own executioner. it all ends with him sitting on the ground at the lip of the abyss with his hair falling in his face. he looks so#unkempt and fallen apart and so distinctly *non-Shen Qingqiu* that LBH feels physically ill over it. tears are streaming down SQQ's face#and despite everything he is smiling. its not a nice smile. its a very frayed falling apart at the seams about to crack smile.#he tells shizun not to worry about staining his blade with this disciple's filthy blood because this disciple will take care of it himself.#and then he falls into the abyss before luo binghe can so much as grab him. the only reason LBh doesn't literally jump in after him is bc#he was numb with shock and the abyss was already closed before he could feel his legs again :]
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wade can talk about noble sacrifice and marvel jesusing all he wants but he was ready to die for his friends and for logan, instead of logan, because he wanted him to live. “say hi to my friends for me, peanut”, says the man who wants logan to become a part of the group, a pack, again, to take his place in protecting the people he loves, probably the only one he trusts to do so. and there is so much love in his desire for logan to stay alive and finally experience something good in life
#this realization hit me like a train and im writing this with shaking hands and wet eyes because there is!!! so much!!!! love!!! in!!! this!#and look. i know i could be overthinking this a bit and add some meanings that canon writers didn't mean to put in there#but the power of the good story!!! is that it has space and it allows its readers to breathe and fill the said spaces!!!#with their interpretations of the story!!!! and that's exactly what dp&w has!!!#anyway yea i keep decomposing in the pit called poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#deadpool#wolverine#deadclaws#poolverine#**dw
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@dont-hug-me-its-yuri LOOK VPN VPN
Colin, have you ever considered dating someone? If so, what's your type?
Colin: Ow... I think I broke my leg...
#IM LITERALLY SHAKING RIGHT NOW OH MY GOD#I LOVE YOU VPN#AHHHHHH#IM SHAKING SO MUCH#/POS#IAHSBSJSKSMSNDNJJ#DHMIS#colin reblogs!! ^^
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i never know how to phrase it but something about the way beatles biographers and people in general view paul's reflexive placating persona and determination to smooth things over as manipulative or duplicitous and john's reflexive barbed persona and habit of lashing out as brave and subversive despite both being equally defensive mechanisms to shield themselves from the world that resulted in them saying things that weren't true says more about how we culturally view kindness or friendliness as inherently untrustworthy or flimsy and anger and carelessness as more believable as someone's true nature than it says about either of them in actuality
#the beatles#john lennon#paul mccartney#mclennon#idk if im explaining this well but it always gives me whiplash to read how 'beatles historians' elsewhere view them#bc it seems like for all that theyre able to make the simple connection between johns past and trauma to his behavior#as a protective mechanism to shield him from vulnerability#far fewer people make the equally reasonable connection between pauls past#with parents that never said i love you to each other or told their children about a serious illness#and an adult paul who doesnt examine his own feelings much less speak candidly about them#or stories like mike mccartney talking about being beaten by jim while paul yelled at him to just say that he 'didnt do it' so it would sto#and an adult paul who has clearly internalized the basic cause and effect of the things you say and the consequences that come from them#and how the truth is less relevant in those situations than the obvious path of least resistance that will spare you needless pain#idk i have a lot of thoughts and feelings on how people see paul mccartney#i want to shake some of these biographers and be like this mid-20s kid experiencing a level of scrutiny and pressure#the world had never seen before#was not puppeteering everything to meet his vision#he was trying to protect himself and his friends from the very real danger of public perception!!#my posts
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… crime scene
#ace attorney#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#maya fey#kay faraday#grimace shake#fanart#artists on tumblr#my art stuff#<3#guys idk why i spent so much time on this but i hope u like it im rlly proud of it#1k#5k
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Thoughts on Jack's dream(MASSIVE main story spoilers ahead)
JACKS DREAM got me by the thROAT bc the more I analyze it the more angsty it feels and I alreadfy sobbed n cried and I must SCREAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMM He's dreaming of the magift tournament but basically if..... if Leona's plan never took place....... If Leona actually WERE the hero Jack has idolized...... 😭
First I gotta take note dosodkgkfdgjdfkghfdjk hOW JACK YEARNS FOR HIS SENPAI'S PRAISE AND AFFECTION 🥺🥺truly the epitome of loyal, puppy-like behavior..... It doesn't take much for him to be happy… He yearns for the respect and acknowledgement of those he admires. He craves respect and recognition, but not only that—he genuinely wants to see those he admires thrive.
Seems to me that what Jack longs for most is a sense of belonging within a pack. He��s not just devoted to those he holds in high regard; he also desires to be cared for in return (This becomes even more apparent when he asks Ruggie to act as a mentor or older-brother figure in his dorm uniform vignette.) Jack's actions reflect his innate wolf nature—a being built for connection, loyalty, and mutual protection. No matter how much he tells himself or others how he prefers to handle things on his own… We can clearly see that Jack is happier when he’s part of a team, fighting alongside companions who’ve got his back. It’s the dynamic balance of trust: to protect and be protected, to rely on others and let them rely on him in return. It deeply resonates with the essence of wolves.
We often hear the phrase “lone wolf,” an expression of grudging admiration. A lone wolf is often viewed as a rugged individualist, uncompromising and independent, driven to forge his own path, unfettered by the sentimental need for companionship. In reality, few people would ever want to live this way—and, as it turns out, few wolves would either. Wolves, males and females alike, may go through periods alone, but they’re not interested in lives of solitude. A lone wolf is a wolf that is searching, and what it seeks is another wolf. Everything in a wolf’s nature tells it to belong to something greater than itself: a pack. Like us, wolves form friendships and maintain lifelong bonds. They succeed by cooperating, and they struggle when they’re alone. Like us, wolves need one another. (source)
Which is why the factual reality cuts so deeply.
After Ortho wakes Jack up (in oUTER SPACE DKJGDSDKFJGKJS that was so adventitious but so cool.....) and Jack falls down like a meteorite (ALSO SUPER COOL BUT WTF.....) Fake!Leona and Fake!Ruggie rush to his side, Leona softly reassures him, saying it’s a relief he’s uninjured and advising him not to be so reckless while Ruggie says ''You're a promising rookie. Our treasure.'' (I started crying here.)
Jack breaks into a bitter, despairing laugh as the truth crashes down on him. The sincerity and warmth his “upperclassmen” showed in that moment? It wasn’t real. It never actually happened. Jack recounts his excitement when he first joined Savanaclaw, eager to fight alongside the dormmates he admired so much. He talks about how he had watched Leona’s play three years ago—over and over again, captivated by it. He reveals the painful truth of discovering their wicked plan, the frustration of being unable to snap them out of it, and the overwhelming helplessness that consumed him.
I gotta say, I'm SO HAPPY that Jack's feelings on the events of book 2 were finally properly addressed now (cause let's be real, book 2 uhh... did kinda a shitty job at this 💀 Neither the narrative nor the fandom really took the time to explore the emotional impact it had on him, which is such a disservice to his character.)
Think about it from Jack’s perspective. He was obsessed with Leona's play 3 years ago, watching it over and over again. In his eyes, Leona was a hero, someone worth idolizing to the point of projecting an idealized image of him: an earnest, hardworking, honorable leader. When Jack finally had the chance to join Savanaclaw and be part of the dorm he had admired so deeply, what was his reality? Ostracization, bullying and even physical violence from some of his dorm mates (as shown in Leona's dorm uniform vignette) And worst of all? Jack was met with his idol’s true, treacherous side—dirty tactics, underhanded schemes, and a willingness to harm others to achieve his goals. When Jack tried to confront them about it, he wasn’t met with understanding or respect. Instead, he was called a “filthy traitor” and a “spoiled brat”—by the very person he admired most. It’s a complete dismantling of everything Jack believed in, everything he worked for.
It's a shame the game and manga did not give enough weight to Jack’s feelings, (the novel seems to do a better job at it though) but now it’s clear just how much this hurt him. It wasn’t just a setback; it was a deep, personal betrayal that shook him to his core.
He’s only a first-year. Beneath his gruff demeanor and physical strength, Jack is still a boy—pure-hearted, earnest, and full of hope. All he wanted was to stand beside those he respected most but what he got instead was disappointment, betrayal, and rejection. To idolize someone so deeply, only to have that image crushed in the most personal, gut-wrenching way........ Savanaclaw doesn't deserve him 💔
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,,,,okay forgive me to break the essay to talk about this but I'm going insane over the fact fake Ruggie ominously coos, ''Hey puppy-chan you're a good boy so come here.....'' UGHGHHHDSHNGDSHNDGSHHHnnnnhhHHHH HE IS BASICALLY SAVANACLAW'S UNOFFICIAL MASCOT,,,,,,, their loyal little puppy 🥺🥺🥺😭😭
fake ruggie and fake leona try to lure him in to sleep again, but Jack says he has no intention of fighting alongside fakes and defeats them 😌
And we get this utterly precious moment where Jack praises Yuu and Grim for having guts and persevering through everything and he PETS GRIM'S HEAD............ HE DIDN'T NEED TO COMFORT THEM BUT AWWAAHBBBAYYAWYWYHAWWABYWAWAYAA
I can't wait to see what role he'll play in Leona's dream 😌 Jack’s arc feels like it’s finally getting the weight it deserves… 🙏🙏🙏
#twisted wonderland#twst spoilers#twst book 7#jack howl#leona kingscholar#ruggie bucchi#savanaclaw#shakes shaeskshakesshaks you IM LOSGIN MY MIND..........#JACK PETTED MY HEADD TOOOOOOO NOT JUST GRIMS!! *inhales copium*#THIS UPDATE WAS SO GOOD 🙏#thank you for giving me tiny itty crumbs......#unrelated but the moment when leona said ''you woke up.....poor thing'' uhh that was 😳😳😳incrediblhy..........ghghghrhgrrrrr hgoroh#you know at his breakdown i couldn't stop thinking of a line from phantom of the opera that fits him so much at that moment#“farewell my fallen idol and false friend. we had such hopes but now those hopes lay murdered”#jack and leonas relationship is so complex i love them so much :(((
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You're my angel Angel baby, angel You're my angel, baby Baby, you're my angel Angel baby
#fnaf dlc ruin#fnaf security breach#fnaf eclipse#fnaf cassie#Angel baby was on loop during this#hes so gentle im gunna cry#Cassie is adorable btw i love her so much-#sHAKES THE DAYCARE DOORS#LET ME INNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
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My favourite scene had to be when they were all trapped with a fat ass dragon trying to kill them as water started to fill up the cave at a dangerous rate and Edgin was desperately trying to plan their escape, and as this was happening Xenk was just in the back chilling and turned on by Edgin LMFAOOO
Like the stare? the smirk? the smile? He has a competency kink please. This man was not at all bothered by Themberchaud or drowning to death because he knew he was safe with a certain 'harper shaking off his slumber' with him, if you rewatch this scene he's just heart eyeing him the entire time in the background, and that's why it's my favourite scene
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Bonus angry wet cat Edgin reaction:
#its heart warming that Xenk just believed in Edgin so much and the way he said just a harper shaking off his slumber?? IM GONE!#dnd movie#dndhat#dnd honor among thieves#dnd#edgin darvis#xenk yendar#dungeons and dragons#honor among thieves#dndhat spoilers#xedgin#xenk x edgin#edgin x xenk
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The Bad Kids + Summer drinks
#ill explain the drinks after character tags For anyone who cares#dimension 20#fantasy high#gorgug thistlespring#fabian aramais seacaster#figueroth faeth#kristen applebees#adaine abernant#adaine o'shaughnessey#riz gukgak#btw none of these r alcoholic cuz i love my silly sweet drinks#gorgug has melon soda Cuz i think that’s the best ramune flavor i am not debating Facts#fabian has a blue hawaiin frozen punch Purely for the aesthetics#riz had thai iced coffee because once again it’s the best coffee and I am not arguing facts#also there’s so much trig and astrophysics references on his tattoos because i love math and projecting#speaking of projecting fig has a rooh afza because i love projecting myself in silly ways .. best swana drink To Me#kristen has taro boba because I felt like giving her a protein shake would be Too obvious and taro is So Good#Lasty adaine has a strawberry Italian cuz she deserves a sweet drink#ive worked on this for So long i think u can tell which were the last . im so sorry#going to pass out And never do this again / silly#taya art
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Hi gueys 🧍 (run away again)
#HI AGAIN#sigh I love moon#I’m not even gona get into it because I will rant for hours incohearantly#I want to make him a little nest so he can be all cozy he deserves it 😔😔💔#kills him with my mind#ALSO SOME SPAMTON STUFF SPRINKLED IN!!!#sorry spam lover followers I haven’t been making much 😔 just know I still love him#spamton#deltarune#art#spamton g spamton#fnaf#sundrop fnaf#sun fnaf#sun fanart#moondrop fnaf#moon fnaf#fnaf moon#nuttdoodles#my art#silly goober time tbh!#ALSO GGRGRGRGRGRGRGGRR IM GONA SHAKE THE DAYLIGHTS OUT OF MOON#TAKES HIM BY THE SHOULDNERS AND SHAKES HIM AFFECTIONATELY#im normal#also random doodle thrown in there because I liked it!
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how i suppose the whole Everyone Sees The Interceptor Differently thing goes
#pokemon rejuvenation#interceptor aria#aelita rejuvenation#huey rejuvenation#lavender rejuvenation#my art#i have so many thoughts on this topic in particular im shaking awaiting the day someone dares to ask#so much rejuv posting recently sorry the worms are controlling my brain
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