#im literally gonna die right now | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

uniformbravo · 9 months ago

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i am doing soooo good at pretending my current fixation isn't rapidly spiraling into full-on obsession territory

#i have just finished s1 of your wings and mine and hhrhngghhrmnghr i wanna know what happens next SO FUCKING BAD #but i'm being sooooo patient and putting it down for the day instead :3 #(pencil im holding snaps in half)#retag later #webtoons blogging #IT'S SO HARD bc im also working on an oc illustration rn #(the very one that got me to start reading ywam)#which would normally be a gr8 distraction but the oc has wings and LIKE HFNGHSKNG I CAN'T /NOT/ THINK ABT YWAM THE ENTIRE TIME LIKE???#i was workin on it earlier and had to stop and open up webtoon bc it was ALL I COULD THINK ABOUT HGGHGAHGHAHG #im SO fucking normal about this webcomic!!!!!!!!!!! im insane!!!!!!!!!!#im literally gonna die right now #comic that is 60% poop jokes and also has the most heartwrenching character arcs & backstories literally EVER #lies on the ground frothing & gurgling #but im being so normal & good 😇

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rapidhighway · 24 days ago

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avoidance is my fucking doom man, i know i should go to class but i fucking cant get myself to

#i have. so many absences it's ridiculous to go right now i know it will be worse if i dont go i have to go #ive been just tossing and turning for like 2 hours with some freakign heart palpitations cause im so fucking scared #i was supposed to go last week and i didnt do it then either and every time i feel worse but i cant make myself go #AAAAAAAAA Im gonna die here i know i just have to force myself but i dont want to i want to stay at home which will fix nothing and #make everything worse in the long run #im aware of thsi but i still cant get myself to go idk what to do in this situation i feel horrible augh #i have so many absences I literally went once at the start of the semester and it's been what. 2 and a half months almost 3 #i didnt do much for the class and i didnt go to class idk what to do.. theres literally no other way than to force myself to go #i KNOW I'll instantly feel better if i just stay home. i knowww i knowwww but its not going to help anything #i feel like shit and so ashamed and i just really dont want to go through this #FUUCK #im just #completely in panic mode rn. idk if i wont just try to go tomorrow idk if this is a bad decision im still just putting it off #im just totally by myself and cant even talk to anyone to calm down uauauhcgchdhd #im feeling pretty pathetic rn i should be able to do thisss i should be able to do this by myself #this is like self inflicted psychological horror and it's like every other day for me for many years now ouughh

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rearranging-deck-chairs · 7 months ago

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if 9&10 were "dont wander off", and 11&12 were "the doctor lies", 13s rule #1 is "dont question me"

"have we not had a good time together" shes pointing yaz to the rule that yaz very well knows is there: we can travel if you dont ask me any difficult questions. yaz knows this is the rule - "because you ask too many questions", "this team structure isnt flat" - but she also was the one to invite the doctor into her home so im pretty sure she also knows shes not gonna kicked out that easily. she has some leeway. which she has been using between revolution and flux, which is why the doctor reminds her of the rules

i dont think she'd kick her out though. she wouldnt. i think it's just that the more you break the rule, the more unpleasant she becomes to be around, and eventually youre gonna walk out on your own. she doesnt want you to, she'd rather you stay and dont ask questions. but if youre gonna try to ask questions anyway, i think thats whats gonna happen

and yaz must think so too. because she does back off. because she doesnt want that to happen either. and it does anyway

#dont question me/dont challenge me. questions are the sore spot but the challenge is one she says explicitly once #because you see this in how she is with other people too. dont try her patience. dont act like shes smaller. dont challenge her or Die #based on the giggle - 'i thought i was clever' 'what do i say?! because im always sooo certain' - i dont think 14 is like this #also based on the expressions of affection #hes not that......reactive. to this. specific thing #so i wonder if it runs over to 15 #he seems chill. i think? he seems fairly chill. but also i think we've so far only seen him mostly in control of things #faced with the maestro temporarily not entirely in control hes Notably Less Chill #but still bigger picture. hes mostly in control of things right now i think #or uhhhh based on how eager he seems to get out of the role of doctor #hmmmmm #13 didnt want it but like. was stuck with it i think #didnt want it but nobody else was gonna do it. thats why 12 regenerated #15 comes out 14 Literally Quitting #he doesnt want it and hes decided hes not stuck with it. maybe #none of this is true btw im just saying words recreationally #like those 13 moments are super cherrypicked and i havent rewatched in forever so #dont believe me gfkjghgjh #this is based more on how i write them than what ive seen basically #anyway in terms of 14/yaz i think it takes yaz a while to figure out how to deal with 14 Not being like this #bc she got soooo practiced at handling 13. most of which was abt like not tripping this rule too much #she'd keep it up with 14 and he'd just do stuff that like breaks the rule from his side and yaz wouldnt have any idea how to deal with it #he'd show her hes chilled out a bit. about this. over and over and it'd still take her moooooonthssssssss to start relaxing #just muscle memory at this point. doesnt help that shes also like this #i wonder if 14 - in a sort of compelte reversal - wants to be told what to do and how to do and #seeks out situations where someone else knows more than him so he can sit down and say 'teach me'#i think thats what he does. about all the human stuff. hes like teach me. all of it. show me how to do this

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opens-up-4-nobody · 5 months ago

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...

#not to vague abt a particular niche of a fandom no one cares about BUT im losing my mind a bit #bc there's a ship that literally got me so invested that i read fanfiction for the 1st time. i adore them so much #i think their canon relationship is so fucking lovely and its bullshit what happened to them. if u kno u kno.#but now i go to ao3 and try to find fics and im like... yo y do these all fucking suck?#like i get it. no one has given a fuck abt this fandom since like the 2010s but i mean ive read lots of way better fics for waaaay #tinier fandoms. i guess thoses ppl just cared way more. no one gives enough of a fuck to write a good fic for these 2.#ugh. im probably just being a bitch. like is it bc its a heterosexual ship? is the bar really so low for writing straight relationships that #they have to b so fucking boring immediately???? like what the fuck is happening. i feel like im losing my mind #wheres the passion? where the dedication? wheres the willingness to die for eachother and fight side by side?#its all boring bullshit or weird self insert feeling smut. or maybe its me. maybe im the problem bc i refuse to read the fics that have #adultery and divorce in them bc im so in denial abt the ending of bleach that i cannot stand to even look at #the canon endgame ships. it makes me to angry. so yea maybe im the problem #i jus6 don't understand it. its the same for narut0 x s4suke fics. like????#did we watch the same show??? why tf r u writing them so weird and boring and wrong????#that one i them im right abt bc others have confirmed it. but idk abt these 2. my fucking original otp is cursed to toil away in bad #fanfiction. or maybe all the good fics r on ff dot net. but fuck if im gonna wade thru that hellsite #anyway. this is what u get when u get invested in terrible anime. i mean with peace and love it is my nostalgia show but like u kno #unrelated

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camels-pen · 1 year ago

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consider sanuso bodyswap where Sanji is of course "admiring" Usopp's body and Usopp is trying desperately to keep himself from getting worked up so that he doesn't light himself on fire.

Luffy and Chopper are not helping. They are in fact doing the opposite of helping. They've ramped up their pranks and are doing anything possible to get Usopp angry so that he combusts, freaks out, and then dives into the ocean to put himself out. They think it's hilarious.

Nami and Brook are Also not helping, since they're conspiring with Sanji to put on a fashion show with Usopp's body. Sanji called it "not wasting a precious opportunity to get him in something other than overalls". Usopp called it mutiny and he was gonna- dive into the ocean, holy fuck Sanji why is it so easy to catch fire?!

Best part about this is that Sanji assured him, several times, that his body doesn't get hurt by catching fire. Usopp still jumps into the ocean every time.

Robin pipes up at one point, asking if Sanji was immune to just his own flames or all flames. Sanji just kind of shrugs and said it depends. Franky, having just been leisurely watching all of this gets an idea. Would his Franky Fireball hurt Sanji's body or just give him more fire to work with?

He tries to coax Usopp into agreeing to test it out and, somehow, he manages it. Albeit, Usopp is all knocking knees and chattering teeth, a very odd sight from 'Sanji'. As part of the deal though, he can only shoot a fireball the size of his hand.

Usopp meant his small hand. The one Franky used for tinkering and fine detail work. He did not, however, clarify this.

So, when a fireball the size of Franky's big hand comes out, well. Usopp runs for his goddamn life.

It takes him a few moments- and the voices of his friends sounding distant and below him- to realize he hadn't, in fact, run to the men's quarters, but rather into the fucking sky.

And oooooh, boy he is gonna kill Sanji one of these days. Why was his body's first fucking instinct when running to go up, what the actual HELL-

Usopp lit himself on fire again.

He curses out Sanji as his Sky Walk fails in the same moment and he plummets towards the deck.

#one piece #sanuso #nemotime #usopp the first time he lights himself on fire: WHAT THE FUCK WHAY THE FUCK WHAT THE HELL OH GOD OH F-#oh ndvdggdvdv okay listen. listen. omagine Zoro's been asleep this whole time. and he misses the memo that there was a bodyswap.#and he wakes up to 'Sanji' kicking him abd immediately goes into fight mode... and then is really fucking spooked #bc 'Sanji' is blubbering about Zoro going to kill him and that he couldnt die this young and Zoro's just. Still as a statue.#Literally cannot compute.#and then 'Usopp' comes up to him. threatening him and calling him names the way he was expecting from 'Sanji'#Brook: oh dear he mustve slept through all the commotion. Zoro-san! Usopp and-!#Nami covering Brook's mouth: No wait i smell a money making opportunity #shes gonna con him. idk how or with what yet but shes definitely gonna con him #hes gonna be sooo pissed when he finds out she conned him but his usual outlet for physical violence is currently indisposed so. lol. lmao.#i like making zoro suffer idk why its just funny #wait wai what if Usopp didnt trip on him what if when he plummets to the deck he lands on Zoro lmfao #also Franky's standing there like 'Why did you dodge it?!' and Usopp is right back to trying not to light himself on fire again lol #oh n Jinbei gets roped into the fashion show stuff #where he incurs 'newbie's first debt to Nami'#damn now im thinking about him slightly concerned about all this spontaneous combustion and then Robin saying something to make it worse lol #ANYWAY MORE IMPORTANTLY the real tragedy of this post is that because Usopp's constantly worried about Combusting #it never really sinks in how blatantly Sanji is checking out his body + enjoying doing that fashion show #and because of Sanji 'enjoying the view' he never notices the brief moments where Usopp quietly does the same #before being interrupted by Luffy and Chopper coming out of nowhere wanting to roast marshmallows on Usopp's leg #okay im done were done im good its bed time gnight gmorning gday to all

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chai-dye · 4 months ago

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*touches screen dramatically* v5 is almost here...

#Im a faker i havent caught up on the post game story at ALL i just know we all eat shit and die and some stuff happens in between there /hj #anyways i was gonna go to sleep then i saw that axez was literally updating the v5 section on the site as i was closing out discord so now #I have the zoomies or something #rahhhhhhhh i need to catch up on the story #I dont know if i have the energy right now with school and work to replay the whole game Again esp untranslated but i know enough to watch #someone else play it prabably #sig blinks now btw at least in the first two cutscenes which is mindblowing news /silly #axez animate my scenes too right meow /silly #the real answer is i need to get not scared enough to talk in the big m04 server but that's... perhaps i shant...#I just lurk like a little bug. a little bachi buggg. anyways #mutuals you should totally add me on discord i stole our hosts account we can be silly about numa game together /nf #status noir #🕶️ posting

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junkissed · 10 months ago

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his eyes are sooo sparkly i could actually cry he is literally the prettiest man in the whole entire universe. the universe itself lives in his eyes

#[💒] — june.txt #no like u dont get it im not joking rn there are literally tears in my eyes #i love love loooove dark dark brown eyes like theyre so dark they look almost black. theyre so so so fucking pretty theyre my favorite #im literally gonna throw myself into the ocean and drown in the sea of my tears #june opened pinterest and went down an emotional rabbit hole sorry guys #look at how beautiful he is. iam going to kill myself with a rock #everyone leave my blog i need a moment alone with him #i am going to stare into his eyes for eons. for all of eternity #sitting at my laptop tears rolling down my cheeks 468 pinterest tabs oepn #hes so stunning i am going to commit an atrocious crime #hes so gorgeous do u see him. do u see him. look at him right now #dont even ask me about his moles i dont have the emotional stability to start like please i cant. only one facial feature per day #so. unfortunately i Do have to go die now .goodbye #[🐈] — jun visuals

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itsalwaysdark · 4 months ago

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i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is

#ive been overthinking 1 light and casual mildly funny response to something but im worried itll come off as disrespectful and dismissive And #make me seem stupid and uncaring all at the same time. and also be seen as insulting. but like idt itd be insulting right like. im not #saying what it is so ig for all you guys know im like I mean if i say All your shit suck ball and i hateit kys. <- thats not the thing i was #going to say #like it doesnt matter now the window for response is closed now but i feel stupid bc i shouldve just said it it was light and casual. im so #bad at keeping convos gojng im convinced im not going to survive. In like a light and casual way like in a He will not make it through the #winter joke way. dw. im not going to do anything bc i had One failed interaction. if i was going to do anythjng itd be bc of the 8000000 #other failed interactions. But im not. anyways. it just makes me feel so useless 😭 like i want to respond i want to talk to ppl so bad but #i feel like i mess things up Irreparably every time i speak OR i take too LONG overthinking my response and then i just cant respond bc its #been too long and then its been 3 years and the only messages ive ever sent r my intro message and 1 message 2 years ago that nobody #responded to at all. or the conversation stopped immediately after. and like i used to be better at this i was lkke. talkative in a couple #muts servers like. i talked 2 ppl daily in those servers and i had fun and like. I was an important part of the group and i felt like it #but i just feel like such an outsider for Everything and its literally my fault bc i cant just like. Talk. The explosion. bc im always like #im gonna try im gonna do it this time im gonna get it back im going to finally be Good connor and im going to fix it all and make a Good #solid friend group and ill find HEALTHY LOVE and i wont selfsabotage and ill move out and have a job and ill balance it well and ill start #all my hobbies and ill have a great routine and be so loveable and on top of it and not stressed and content and happy and roll with the #punches and then theres a single hiccup and im like Well fuckinf whatever im going to be an unemployed hermit forever and im going to die b4 #im 25 anyways so Who cares and also im digging a little hole for myself. and its like. AUGHH ik i just have to persevere and overcome but #even saying that feels so stupid its not fucking hard its Talking to ppl. like. i literally if ive ever said a word to you i had to think #avt it and strategize how to respond right even for like. like. it makes it sound like its not genuine it is #like for example i want to say hey i love your art! but then i freak out and im like thats not normal thats like a rly generic comment they #hear that all the time theyll thjnk im being polite and my brains like hrmmm rewrite Your art changed my life. It shaped me. Ill never be #the same. Nad im like ok too far overcorrected go back and the sentence generator is like Your art has colors 💯 like. GOD. WHY IS IT SO #difficult. and then usually i either just dont say anythinf and feel awful abt it 4ever OR i send it on anon and then i spend like 15 #minutes ibsessively slightly tweaking the apelling and capitalization and punctuation to make sure it doesnt seem like its me just in case #it Is the worst possible thing to say but then i see the response and itll be like AWWW TYSM :] THIS MEANS A LOT or whathaveyou and i feel #stupid bc i couldve just Told them this to their face and it wouldve been a good positive interaction we had. but instead i had 2 hide and #tyoe entirely differently so they couldnt sniff me from my typing style. and it soesnt even feel like the thanks is actually 4 me bc i #tweaked the message sm. and it still makes me happy that the oersons hapoy but its like. that couldve been a nice mutual interaction #like not that i need a personal ty i compliment ppl when i Want to compliment ppl and when its genuine yk. i dont do it so i get mutualpoint

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imaginarianisms · 10 months ago

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more asoiaf comparisons, parallels & antiparallels to the first dance of the dragons vs the second & final dance of the dragons (& possibly the sixth blackfyre rebellion): the blacks being daenerys i targaryen's supporters, the golds being aegon vi targaryen's supporters, tommen baratheon being a close equivalent to gaemon palehair & his mother essie & sylvenna sand which may be interpreted as a parallel with queen cersei lannister & taena merryweather of myr, trystane truefyre being a close equivalent to aegon/young griff & perkin being jon connington & the shepherd being the new high septon the high sparrow, dalton greyjoy being euron i greyjoy's ancestor & the latter surpassing him, alyn waters later alyn velaryon resembling aurane waters later aurane velaryon & finishing what their ancestors started. history repeats itself.

#LIKE!!!! LOOK AT THE PARALLELS BRUH #it kinda makes me wonder who the hightowers would support this time...#its literally so wild how history repeats itself #i think the lannisters would support aegon after he takes king's landing bc they're lowkey fucked either way.#cersei lannister's probably either in hiding at casterly rock or will end up as aegon's political prisoner. maybe jaime too idk.#i have no idea who would lead the lannisters on the side of the golds now that kevan's dead killed by varys tho... maybe genna lannister?#cersei jaime & tyrion's aunt? to parallel johanna lannister who attacked the ironborn like a boss bitch??#i personally predict aegon'll marry sansa who would have the north the riverlands & the vale at her back—it'd be arranged by baelish & varys #i also think it's possible he'd take arianne martell as another wife to parallel aegon & his wives visenya & rhaenys.#so by taking sansa & arianne as his wives & queens both of whom are well beloved in their countries he'd restore honor to their houses.#bc aerys & later the baratheon dynasty was a terrible time for the starks & the martells so he brings the north & dorne back into the fold.#so by marrying sansa he honors & respects her given her past betrothal to joffrey & forced marriage to tyrion & mending what aerys did #particularly to her grandfather rickard stark & her uncle brandon stark & to her aunt lyanna stark.#& by marrying arianne he's restoring honor to house martell considering all the bs his mother elia martell experienced in king's landing.#(whether elia actually Is his mother or who he perceives her to be) & restoring the line of succession again in dornish hands #& they'd probably marry him on the condition that the northerners & dornish gets special rights & privileges that others don't.#& not to mention that the targaryens starks & martells have a common enemy.#polygamy's a big nono in the faith of the seven but that didn't stop aegon & his wives & im sure after everything w/ the faith rn??#w/ cersei & the sparrows?? & considering aegon's actually a decent person & he'll be foreshadowed to be popular & loved??#i don't think most would bat an eye tbh. i actually think daenerys would wanna talk to aegon first tho.#then everything & everyone around them goes to shit & they end up fighting bc like. daenerys wants SO BADLY to have a family.#so like i don't see her immediately perceiving aegon as a threat.#the starks & most of the north would prolly be wary of dany @ 1st due to aerys & having a MASSIVE army w/ three dragons until the long night #except for like. maybe jon. but anyway the martells could be slightly wary of dany bc of what happened with quentyn in meereen.#idk maybe there's a division in the north & dorne. i think sansa & arianne would actually get along personally.#anyway im presuming stannis is gonna be at the nightfort & i personally don't think he's ever gonna come south again. he'll die at the wall.#ooc.

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leofrith · 9 months ago

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ooooooh my god i need some fucking joy i need some fucking joy NOW

#literally nothing is bringing me enjoyment right now NOTHINGGGG #(yes i know its the depression. whatever.)#i havent played bg in like three weeks. not even enjoying that anymore either #and i CANT FUCKING WRITE!!!!!#I'm so exhausted all the time I'm so bored I'm so lonely #and yeah I'm reading more lately which is great but I'm hardly enjoying myself I just #im so fucking bored im sick of killing myself to complete job applications just to hear nothing back im so. so tired #whatever!!!!! life sucks and then you die #pretty sure my birth control is gonna kill me anyway so whooo caresssss #idk what this post is about #tbd

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soobvape · 2 months ago

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heol

#⠀ᶻᶻ⠀turn it up!⠀#unrelated its ltr not even what i linked but chasing time - azealia.. Dontttt omg ts is so facking good who made that beat!!!!!!!!!!#ANW. if breakaway is minhui then this is yijun. mayb the single ver more than true romance ver actually.. it js sounds more raw #i rly wanna talk abt why he hates jaehee #bc i’ve yapped abt minhui and talked abt DY/JY sort-of parallels in replies somewhere i found it the other day #and ik the ‘he doesn’t fit’ is what's been written (in pieces + that yt rundown i think) but likee it goes deeper than that #im gnna struggle to put it into words properly but im talking to myself so i can not make sense as much as i want thanks #ok. so he goes on and on abt how jaehee ruined BS bec he ‘didn’t fit’ into the four that they were without him but. he’s lowk projecting #he joined JG in 2016 - jiyeol mai hyeonmin and KOHEN were all there before him. jy’s in ‘08 mi + kh in 2010 + hm 2011 #they chucked their whole childhoods away for jg - and in reward they were meant to be jg’s first boygroup #they ltr would’ve debuted in 2013 if it wasn’t for hyojoo being like hey! this is kinda weird lol! a 17 yo two 15 yos + a 13 yo is weird!#yj was late as HELLLL 2the party. he wouldve been left as a trainee while JY MI KH HM debuted as 9ANTHER if it wasnt 4 The Kohen Mai Thing #aka they started messing around in like 2014 while jy pretended he wasnt abt to crash out and hm had to listen to jy trying not2 crash out #then it got real bad like august 2016 and all of a sudden they HATEDD eo they couldnt even b in the same room #(aka. kh wanted him mi wanted jy and said Lollll i hate u die)#all in all: kh kicked off debut team. spot opens up for yijun right as he enters the company. he’s not cut out for ts at all #he was lonely back home and now he’s lonely here and now apparently he’s in a debut team with 3 guys who know eo and he wants to die #hyeonmin like smiles at him like ONCE during practice and he latches on fastttt this leech 😭😭😭 tries to worm his way in via hm #spoiler! it only half works theres sand under his skin he hates it all he’s not meant for them he needs a gun #it gets better over the years and jy + mi sorting their shit out & cutting off kh completely makes yj feel wayy more secure #and then they debut even if it is after yoonhae’s literal death. and then jaehee comes in like Hiii i like to act and colour ^_^#HE WNATS TO DIEE ITS HIM ALL OVER AGAIN!!!!!!! cant even bear to look at him #like the walls are UP he’s not letting himself become kohen. and when jh tries to get close to min - ltr exactly like he did.......#ITS NEVER BEEN MORE BONSOVERRRR #so there. he’s mean and hates him and wants him dead for that. Yayyyy #kh has def said some nasttyyyyy shit to yj too ijbol like mind you he didnt leave jg until jy did! THIS YEAR!#the song. is abt himself. him to him in the mirror. to kohen. to jaehee. he’s mad at shit that’s never happened and he’s never gonna stop #the ‘why did you fall for me’ though.. that’s him to min like #he feels like he’s conned him into it - bec the first couple months he only rly was around him to try and get into the inner circle #and then he fell in Lol. Gay

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euclydya · 2 months ago

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sometimes curly just grabs me (or like. as best as it can without hands) and starts telling me about how much people he's going to kill or that he needs to kill people Immediately and I'm just like. ok man. are you good

#pk;m jimmy🐑#im literally vibing listening to jerma and he started gently biting me and going I'M GOING TO KILL SO MANY PEOPLE.#SO MUCH PEOPLE ARE GOING TO DIE. IM GONNA START KILLING RIGHT NOW. I WILL KILL SO MUCH.#and I'm just.#good lird.#edit: it just cackled at me and opened spotify and added I Kill People to his playlist.

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acebytaemin · 2 months ago

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girls. the way i embarrassed myself as a damn near 30 yr old woman

#im hanging on by a fucking THREAD right now as we speak fighting for my life I wanna get up and get my ginger anti nausea pill #tw emetophobia #but. i went to meet up w leo bestie and we ended up at our fav bar and i drank so much i threw up in the TAXI HOMEEEEEE IM GONNA DIE #i was wearing my fav coat too and it’s soiled i gotta take it dry cleaners tmrw #this is soooooooooo embarrassing i literally. GOD….! anyway point and laugh ig #idk the last time i actually threw up like this is so bad poor taxi guy i am so sorry to him ohhhhhhh my godddddd

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kavehater · 3 months ago

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Man I just give up.