#im here posting on tumblr to nobody
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not to 21 pilots post in 2024 but there's truly nothing like crying and listening to Truce
#spotify very helpfully made me a playlist for crying#im just feeling so isolated lately#i just wish somebody cared#like at all#it makes me want to act out and scare people tbh#just scream that im not fine#im not tough#im not strong#im hurting#im just not ok anymore#its getting bad#truly feels like nobody cares who isnt blood related to me#my mom and my sister are the people who keep me from killing myself tbh#they need me#i really think everyone else would get over it in a year or so#and i feel so stupid for being 25 and still feeling so powerless and stupid#im here posting on tumblr to nobody#like a fucking loser#personal
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You can see under the cut him without the Jojo Siwa makeup 🤣😹🤧
#Should i post here too?#I dont Really know anymore#Most of you follow me ig i guess#But if you dont my ig is :momeless_boiii#I think i will post art more frequently there#joost klein#clowncore#clown art#Art#artist on tumblr#Please still dont tag eurovision in these kind of posts#Still so mad...#europapa#Also why nobody talking about whe never get the chance to see the 100%%% version of his performance???#Im so curious#Jessie J who's laughing now playing in the distance
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A little promo with my little obsession on the side...........
Reminder all items are shipped from Poland - for details on shipping times check out FAQ or send me a private message!
mmezzy.bigcartel.com
#klance#halloween au#im projecting on the internet my own impostor syndrome#i feel that im awful and should be learning how to draw instead of writing shitty fics#and when i want to write a post and share a little doodle or smth - 'sorry' is right between the lines and its so frustrating#like???? nobody probably cares#im either here or im not#and if i need to finish that little abomination of a fic then so be it you'd think people wouldnt mind too much#and would still want to listen to my captions and see whatever silly doodle however silly it is as long as its true#..............but what if its all redundant#what if i cant draw after i had to flip my entire routine upside down#and will forever chase a thrill of feeling like a prolific artist and it will be always out of reach now#what if people scroll past my art and feel nothing now#what if world is filled with people who kinda hate klance but stay out of reflex and not bc its their deeply routed source of comfort#what if i reached an artistic plateau and will never be good enough#what if this is the limit of my 'talent'#what if i will forever love the projects i want to share but will always hate the execution of it wanting to fix it fix it fix it learn mor#i keep reading the little notes i get on orders#some screenshots i saved#i find good words and opinions and love letters to art as a whole#and i feel insufficient#subpar#i drew a comic about it to an old poem and still havent finished it#there is a point of trying your best when it stops feeling like a challenge and feels like a failure#its the moment where you keep going of course#and yet#there are emotions im sure nobody shares on social media bc we just try to get through them#but who else will take it better than tumblr tags#either way if im less around its because im dealing with creational self-hatred and artistic ambitions#but on the other hand arent all artists like that? i ran out of tag space btw have an awesome weekend
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"no one actually cares about the spotify links you post" wrong. i do. i mean it when i say i listen to at least half of the songs people put on my dash. a solid amount of my music i find through random hyperlinks or, preferably, a dramatic text post that uses smalltext.io liberally. i will even google randomly posted lyrics to find out which song it's from and then listen to it attentively and put it in a playlist if i like it. dont know whose god complex this is going to feed but i need to put this out there
#i ONLY do this on tumblr though youre the only people i trust have good music taste#and you do! there's so many songs i've found on here which i love#i listen to your mp3 your spotify links and your playlists and im having a great time! bitch!#found mitski through that nobody meme found ethel cain through a post saying 'listen to crush by ethel cain right now' and i did#maisie peters was obviously tay and alex's doing... sam's playlists are responsible for at least 30% of the songs i listen to#dance fever my fav album of all time i first listened to bc of a text post that did in fact use small text generator#so much beauty in the world keep sharing it with each other. <3#personal
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🤍🫂🌹
#this is a very very soft announcement bc it might change (as you know me smh 🙄)#as some might remember i said like 1-2 months ago that id see how i feel about tumblr after cmi11.5 and see whether i want#to stay or close that chapter of my life! and i've been thinking about it a lotttt these days and i keep going back and forth#but i think depending on how everyone likes Entertainer it might be my last fic on here 🤍#which again.. can change depending on my mood n motivation.. im also not saying this to get attention etc but to inform you where i stand :)#writing is just a looooot of effort and tumblr has been vvv quiet (i also think my blog has lost some relevance but that's okay!! things#move fast)#i have soooo many wips i love lol 😭 but im not sure if i have the energy to write 20-40k stuff when nobody's around anymore :(#but let's see how you like Entertainer bc im vvv excited for it!! 🥰 keep spreading love until then <3#love you guys sm 🤍#might delete since it's an unsure post.. just wanted those who see this or care to know 🫂
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at what point is an intro post necessary?
OH WELL HERE IT IS!
my name on here is skate, im a minor, im a girl, i use she/her pronouns and i have no idea what im doing!!
im in highschool so im a busy girl and i will complain about school
some fun facts about me are: i play 6 instruments and sing, i like reading, my favourite season is winter, i speak a fair amount of french and italian and i can crochet.
im also mentally ill so just prepare yourself for that!
most of my posts are about osemanverse but i love taylor swift and will not shut up about her. i am in a pitch perfect and dead poets society phase at the moment so expect some of that too and mostly i post whatever else pops into my head at the time.
my asks are open and i love answering literally anything and if you ask a question ill probably fall in love with you or smth
my tags are 'skate has words' for my writing 'skate answers' for answering asks and 'skate rants!' for rants obviouslyyyy
also my messages are open and, yes, i am extremely awkward, i would LOVE to be friends !! i need to add that i am very unwell sometimes for long periods of time and will sometimes just not respond to messages. i am sorry but ill get there eventually.
im very infrequent on here and will sometimes forget tumblr exists for weeks so im never ignoring you im just stupid and i have memory issues
if youre gonna be mean to pretty much anyone i dont really want you here. just dont be an asshole guys.
anyway have a good day !! :)
#please never read this#this is embarassing#if you even think for a millisecond that you might know me in person i am politely asking you to leave immediately#intro post#i dont know what to put in here#ps i only did this bc i saw pickledsad do one so shoutout to her!#i dont know how to tag this#i also dk how to use tumblr#how does this work#theres like 120 of you so i figured at least one person would care at least a little bit and if you dont then still be nice i have feelings#( whispers )#if you wanna call me december im okay with that#it was nearly my name#anyway#nobodys gonna see this#but#if you do see this#feel free to call me december i guess#it would make me happy#but no pressure#also like#should i put my tags in this#i will#skate has words#skate answers#skate rants!#i love referring to myself in the third person#i do it ALL THE TIME#its kinda bad#but like
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"You slow down time"
"In your golden hour"
#sometimes i remember shes not real and i have to take a minute to mourn#wasnt going to post this since it was just painting practice (i did not end up painting) but then i ended up liking it so over here it goes#as long as nobody looks too hard at the lighting were good#love procrastinating on my drawings of ortega by. *checks notes* drawing ortega#however i Hate the colour difference between my tablet and my computer. i had to bump up the brightness and saturation on my laptop after i#-finished colouring. hell earth#fhr#ortega#pulp draws#edit: gods CRUNCHIEST quality holy shit#tumblr im strangling you
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gonna put this here now because i have more followers here and someone might help but. images wont load for me rn and i have no idea what the hell is causing it 🥹🥹🥹🥹
#tried it without extensions and also tried it on mobile.. same result :-/#pn.txt#im gonna go nuts... i tried searching about it on google and reddit and people had the same problem but nobody has a (working) fix AUUGGHHH#PLEAASE I NEED TO LOOK AT IMAGES#i dont want to post art too rn because it might fuck it up.... siggghh#its not my wifi too because every other website works fine.. tumblr just stopped loading images for some reason#its all gradients in here im goin nuts
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btw because the embargo on veilguard spoilers for the selected content creators have been lifted im not gonna be here much, even after blacklisting most of the spoiler tags ive seen some and i kinda. dont want to see more story spoilers than what is shown in trailers/ign videos so im just trying to not scroll through tumblr much
#also because even i blocklist tags when i see the show tag posts my fingers itch to look at it#i physically ache because i want to know more but i also want to find out for myself in the game. you know. lmao#so im just trying to do other stuff and not check tumblr that much#but oughghhhhg god i want to have this game in my teeth and gnaw at it like a dog#so yeah nobody cares im not here but just thought id put this out there#at least until the new spoilers and stuff passes so at least a few days i suppose
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" I love art" I say
Meanwhile when I do art there's a like 10% chance of me wanting to throw it smack against a wall out of frustration from any of the listed
It's taking too long
It doesn't match what I had envisioned
My skillset isn't where I want it to be
It hasn't clicked the joy switch in my head yet
Hunger
Tiredness
Existential dread
Accidentally getting color where it was not meant to be and being unable to make it look coherent again
Not being able to make a character look finalized enough no matter how much I touch it up
PERSPECTIVE AND ANATOMY
PERSPECTIVE AND ANATOMY
FOR NO REASON IN PARTICULAR- PERSPECTIVE AND ANATOMY
WHEN I GET MY FUCKING HANDS ON YOU PERSPECT-
#art#digital art#vtuber#artwork#envtuber#character art#artists on tumblr#my art#art process#illustration#art frustration#art study#drawing study#drawing stuff#drawing style#painting#completely unrelated if somebody wants to teach me that would be great#youtube isnt helping#what do you mean an arm is a cylinder???#There's muscles there#im not made of tubes like some sick twisted sippy straw creature#Nobody describes things in a way that my neandertal brain can comprehend#you might as well bash rocks together because i will understand just as much#god bless you for posting tutorials and trying you angel sent from above#but sweetheart i have no idea what these knowledge balloons you're pelting me with even mean it just hurts#it's like rock hard cured cement#How are you all getting information from these?#i've seen so many and yet nothing#You're telling me that the 8 year old Picasso over here drawing hyper realistic horses learned from these tutorials?#I think you're lying and that's Rembrandt reincarnate
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You guys I’m posting so many polls to get my engagement up but it’s not like how it used to be before 😂😭😂😂 ever since even before March when i took that month long break for Ramadan, my notifs were so dry n dead and it’s just not how it was before and i wish i could go back in time when everything was lit and fun but i just don’t know what happened it’s like everyone tuned out and then when i took that break, even more people tuned out and no one came back 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲
#I hate it here 😭😭😭😭#nobody wants to talk anymore#nobody wants to keep the fandom alive anymore#it’s so sad#I remember I’d get into bed all freshly showered ready for my pre sleep tumblr session lol#now i know there’s no point bc it’s just CRICKETS 🦗#UGHHHJJJJH idk what to do yall im running out of poll ideas#and at first i did also post more of those mini Ari drabbles which got notes but like….#the interaction level remains low#AHHHHHHH IDK MAN I NEVER HAD THIS PRIBLEM BEFORE#i however knew that when i started this blog that one day it would die out#and that day is coming soon i feel it#bro i even posted a snippet of the stepdad Ari thing and CRICKETS#😭😭😂😂😂🥲#anyways#I’m gonna go play with my bratz dolls
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😶🌫️
#have yall forgotten how to use tumblr or.#i hate hate HATE complaining but out of 500 notes there are three reblogs with tags like am i going crazy why does nobody say anything#did yall hate the fic or what. bc thats the vibe im getting#im not gonna leave tumblr but i really see why ppl do bc its so disheartening#genuinely i am talking to a brick wall#it really makes me want to not put in the effort to write anymore if no one is gonna say anything to my face#sorry for the vent post but im just frustrated#idk if its my fault or tumblrs fault or no ones fault but#like idk what else to do other than beg ppl to interact. and its not just readers i am fully shaming other authors bc you KNOW how bad it is#and you still refuse to read your friends work#how can you call urself mutuals if you never fucking reblog from each other#its so fake and toxic and im sick of it sorry#im not here to cause drama and i know i sound like a whiny bitch but jesus christ you guys
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youtube
Dirty Robot - Arling & Cameron
#nobody had posted it here yet??#anyway surprise surprise tumblr user vilu 'sunny' just spacetrash is listening to robotmusic again#youre a dirty robot (im a dirty robot🤖)#arling & cameron#dirty robot#my post#anywaysss if anyone wants to listen to my brand new playlist its on spotify as 'metal fingers in my body?😳'#youll never guess what the theme is#Youtube
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ik ppl like to joke that the bbc only have like 10 actors or whatever but fr its kinda the same here (australia)... im watching fisk rn and like. every second background character is someone i've seen in another show. the teacher from little lunch is here pretending to be a lawyer. comedian carl barron is mowing fisk's lawn. aaron chen. justine clarke!!!! what!!!
#nobody is going to care about this but idc. im allowed to make a 0 note post <3#australia#🐝#i was thinking to myself yesterday i should actually start using tumblr more . because i barely talk here. so why not#fisk
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i think what gets me about a lot of recent (by recent i mean roughly ~2 years old) "twitter alternatives" is that theyre either ghost towns bc its a pain in the ass to move to a completely new site or theyre invite only so thats a different barrier. secret third thing is the twt alternative being marketed as a website for Artists and Artists only so you have non artists asking if its ok to join that site. i need 2012 deviantart back immediately
#like yeah im glad this site is catered to and for artists but what abt potential clients ?#i think thats something that a lot of the alternatives seem to miss is that a lot of artists rely on platforms like twt to get cms. i do!#moving to a completely random new site no ones ever heard of is not going to help me in the slightest!#thats why i genuinely have only stuck to twt + tumblr bc ive been using them and i already have ppl Here.#like sorry i dont want to just follow the entire total 75 other people on a new site bc no one else has heard of it or wants to join it#idk i just think abt this every time a new alternative pops up. like who is exclusively posting on Bluesky. nobody.#ppl make their initial posts on new site and then immediately go back to twt bc thats where their audience is.#idk it just never feels like theres any real incentives to join 324 new sites. Whatever man
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I dont ever feel secure in my identity. I feel like i always need others to validate everything i do. otherwise i cant feel sure if im a good or worthy person. its the reason why i spend so much time trying to figure out how to word things. I act in a certain way in order to be validated or liked and I know that's not healthy cause it has hindered me in the past from speaking my mind so many times. Ive neglected communicating my needs and wants so many times in the past to just avoid conflict or fighting. I think im subconsciously scared of being attacked or bullied like i was in school. Where did this fear come from? I wish it would go away, it has a iron grip on my heart.
#personal vent#vent post#vent#social anxiety#I feel kinda embarassed for sharing such intense feelings out in the open like this#I know its tumblr but still it feels like even here i have to keep a clean image or else i'll be like attacked#Or whatever. I dont know why im so paranoid about this stuff. what the fuck is wrong with my brain#Like im sure nobody actually cares that much about me but it just feels that way#actually bpd#actually autistic
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