#im gonna get some ppl mad at me about this but i just. i cannot understand or sympathize what he did.

[hollypies]

I beg of you please tell me the RW lore I am oh so curious

Ok so RW lore us super uhm!! Its a lot. So. Uhm

Short!! Version

The basics is that there was a race called the Ancients that really wanted to die permanently! Death in RW is like sleep. You die and wake back up again, over and over. A cycle.

One day they found the Void, a way to die or ascend permanently. So they started jumping in . Then it had some. Some bad affects on certain ppl. So they made giant living calculators called iterators to figure out how to die permanently. They built a lot of them.

Another point is that the Ancients didn't build things like we do. They made purposed organisms, so the iterators are alive beings. Not just robots.

Anyway there was a GREAT ASCENSION and all the Ancients ascended . So. Now there's a bunch of.. Basically teenage gods with discord. Literally. The communications are like discord lol.

One day an iterator named Sliver a Straw sent out a triple affirmative, basically saying that the Great Problem (ascending permanently and safely) had been found, could be reproduced, and was portable. The Sliver judt straight up fucking died.

Iterators don't really die, so Sliver dying was ljke a big yikes moment. Basically illegal. Not Basically actually, it was literally illegal.

Cue shenanigans, and enter Five Pebbles and Looks To The Moon.

Pebbles is really craving that death right about now, and starts making something to kill him. This is extremely taxing, and Iterators take a massive amount of water for their cooling systems. Unfortunately, Pebbles was built right next to his sister Moon, and so he started chugging her water. Thus slowly killing her of dehydration.

Moon uses her big sibling privilege to yell at Pebbles, making him lose control of his experiment and releasing robot cancer into his systems. While this would kill him like he wanted, he instead decides to keep chugging all of Moons water to fight it off.

Cue slugcat campaigns.

Each slugcat can have their own encounters with Moon and Pebbles. By the time the slugcats are around Moon is almost nonfunctional, her entire structure submerged and damaged. Pebbles is slowly being overtaken by the Rot, which is the name for the cancer. You can help Moon as a slugcat, either by bringing her neurons (literally stealing Pebbles brain cells and then bringing it back to Moon, or by a specific campaign.

Eventually Pebbles gives up, and asks a slugcat to bring Moon a power core to help her. And so she's restored to some power and can begin repairing while he dies of the Rot. Weeee!!

Tbh there's a lot of shit I've missed, but I dont wanna spoil like. All of it all of it. It's. Houghghh.

Also as someone with siblings I cant ever imagine almost killing one for my own personal gain. I know Five Pebbles is a fan favorite and that at the time he made the decision to steal Moons water he was in a dark place, but that just doesn't stand by me. He made the ACTIVE decision to steal Moons water, knowing what it would do to her, and kept doing it even after he unleashed the Rot on himself. I get he's sympathetic to a lot of ppl but I just. I just can't understand it.

[seventh-district]

i’m not like other girls, my “Rest” stats are a heart rate of 110bpm and a HRV of 14 fucking milliseconds. :)

[youngestdaughtersyndrome]

sitting in bed eating cheese absolutely stewing

[minnielvr]

cold chocolate - kim seungmin

˚ ༘ pairing bf! seungmin x fem! reader

˚ ༘ genre fluff, angst!!, seungmins a bit of a meanie :(

˚ ༘ wc 3.4k

˚ ༘ note never writing smth this long (okay 3k words☠️) again idfk how sum ppl do it😭 sorry if this bad guys i cant write rlly good🦦merry xmas!!!

"hey y/n can you come out here?" seungmin called to you from your guys' living room.

"yea whats up babe?" you went over to the couch and sat next to him.

"promise you wont be mad?" he looked at you and raised a brow while grabbing your hand.

"oh god seungmin what did you do now?" you chuckled. obviously you thought that whatever he was going to tell you wasn't that shocking and he was just exaggerating, but you were so wrong.

"no y/n this is serious."

"o-oh okay. uhm whats wrong?" you were starting to get nervous now. does he want to break up? did he cheat on you? a million thoughts raced through your head but not one of them was what he was about to tell you.

"i'm not gonna be home for christmas.." he said it so casually as he looked down in his lap.

"oh."

now usually missing holidays wouldn't be such a problem for you two, except christmas. you guys dont really celebrate anything other than valentines, chuseok, and birthdays, sometimes you guys dont even celebrate birthdays. but christmas? it was a must. you were going to go back home to your family with him for the first time. he had even said yes. now all of a sudden he cant? whats more important?

you inhaled a shaky breath and asked, "why?"

"well you know, we have practice to do, and we have to record some things. so i'll be staying at the dorms." he shrugged and let go of your hands. thinking you were fine.

now that pissed you off. practice? recording? he couldn't skip one week of work for christmas? he was never like this, he has never put his work over you.

"seriously seungmin?. you cant just skip a week of work for christmas? you're putting 'some practice' over me?" you looked up at him with an open mouth.

"no y/n, i cannot." he glared at you. why was he giving you attitude all of a sudden? its not like you're the one who will be missing christmas.

"care to explain why?" you crossed your arms.

"dont you get it y/n? my work is harder than yours, you literally do nothing but sit down at a desk all day and book peoples appointments," he slowly started to raise his voice. "you dont get it all. i cant just be home all the time to give you attention. since when were you so clingy?"

you stood up from the couch and backed away from him, scared of him yelling at you. were you really that annoying? your eyes started to water.

"seungmin wh-why are you getting so mad? i'm just asking you to take a week off for christmas, im sure they'll let you. beside you need a break too." you said while looking down, trying to avoid eye contact so he couldn't see your tears.

"i'm mad because you're annoying! i dont want to take a week off. i cant be with you all the time y/n. leave me alone." he turned to the tv and turned it on, acting as if nothing happened.

at this point there were tears running down your face. how could he be so rude and say something like that? sure you guys have had arguments before and said things, but never like this. he the level-headed one in the relationship. he always keeps his cool during arguments because he knows how upset you get.

maybe it is your fault though. maybe you ask for too much attention and let him do all the work in the relationship. maybe you should leave him alone until christmas is over.

"okay. i'm sorry that im too clingy. i'll just leave" you turned around on your foot to go get your backpack with all your things. you'll stay with a friend or something. maybe you were overreacting a bit but you didn't really care, how could your boyfriend just ditch family plans for christmas like that?

"yea whatever, i dont care" and he dismissed your statement just like that.

now that hurts.

one of your best friends since you were 5, areum, was jeongins girlfriend. you and her were out one day and saw the two of them together, jeongin asked for aerums for her number first and seungmin asked you out a few weeks later. the rest is history.

you just arrived to aerums house and she graciously welcomed you in. seeing the tear stains on your face and your nose red, she figured you had walked here. she was correct. on the way out of your and seungmin's shared apartment, you had forgotten your car keys. but by the time you realized you were already too far down and didn't want to go back up to grab them, especially because seungmin would probably still be in there.

"so? tell me what happened babes" she guided you over to her couch and sat down next to you.

you explained what had happened and she fully agreed with you on your view of the whole thing. i mean, if he already said yes to the plans, why would he switch up all of a sudden? and seungmin would usually take a sick day or soemthing if you asked, he cared about you a lot. you're not saying that he has to prioritize his work over you, but the least he could do was tell you in a nice way or just take a few days off for christmas.

"but wait. that doesn't make sense.." aerum furrowed her eyebrows.

"huh? why?" you looked up at her.

"jeongin said that they have a little christmas break or something like that. i mean, we aren't going anywhere but he said that the boys have no schedules and practices," she looked at you nervously. "do you think that maybe seungmins lying to you?"

well he definitely is, theres no question about that. you just didn't want to believe that he would actually lie to you about something like this.

"n-no he would never..," you looked down in your lap. "oh my god he doesn't want to see my family. he probably thinks i'm rushing into it right? but we were supposed to go to his parents house after that, how is that fair?" you were coming up with all these excuses to not make him look like the bad guy in this situation but there really isnt any. he lied to you and called you cling and annoying. thats the hard truth.

"hey hey calm down its okay," aerum side hugged you and started rubbing your shoulders. "i'm sure it's just a little problem with miscommunication hm? it could be fixed like this." she snapped her finger.

"y-yea of course." you hiccuped. "can i just stay here for the night though? i don't feel like going back yet." you looked up to aerum with wide, teary eyes.

"aw of course honey." she squished your cheeks. "go shower and i'll get some food ready for us. we can watch a movie." she smiled at you and tapped your back to usher you to the bathroom.

you smiled and agreed with her and went to shower. turning the water to borderline boiling so you could release all your thoughts.

you put on some of aerums spare clothes and stepped out of the bathroom and walked to the main room. she had the movie 'home alone' waiting to be played on the tv. she knew it was your favorite christmas movie.

aerum saw you step out and turned her head back over the couch to face you with a big smile on her face, beckoning you to go and sit next to her. you could see a plethora os sugary and salty snacks sitting on the little coffee table in the middle of the room. she really knew how to cheer you up.

you guys ended up watching both home alone movies and ate almost all of the snacks. you guys also fell asleep next to each other on the couch. which was typical for the two of you when you ahd movie nights.

you were the first one to wake up the next morning. rubbing your eyes and aerums foot being the first thing you see was not so pleasant. the sun was shining through the window and you could hear the bustling city of seoul outside. what time was it?

you sat up from the couch while gently taking aerums leg off of your lap. you bent down to grab your phone to see that the time was..2 PM?!?!? seungmin must be worried sick!

you turned to the side and looked at aerum sleeping so peacefully. a little drool coming out the side of her mouth.

"aerum! hey! hey! wake up! it's 2'oclock!" you violently shook her shoulders.

she hummed and swatted your hands away from her body. telling you to shut up.

"as much as i would love to stop doing this i still love you and you have work today. so...get. up." at this point she had opened her eyes and you were staring straight into them.

"oh my god! i have work!" she kicked the blanket off her feet and scrambled to get up off the couch. running to her bathroom to go shower and get ready.

"hey wait! i was gonna go in there!" you chased after her but to no avail. she had already got in and locked the door.

"i know you have boyfriend problems right now but im already late for work! which one is worse y/n?" you could hear her starting to turn on the shower.

"fine, you win." you lightly kicked her bathroom door in anger.

you headed to the kitchen and opened the fridge, looking for ingredients to make breakfast for the two of you. there was nothing inside the fridge except some eggs, bread, butter, and milk. how did aerum and jeongin even survive in this house? at yours and seungmin's apartment, the food inside the fridge and pantry is always stocked. you guys go grocery shopping together too, just to make running errands a little more fun. sometimes he would ride the cart trying to run away from you or sneak in some extra snacks that you guys certainly didn't need to spend so much money on. but thats what made it fun. those little quirks are why you loved seungmin.

as you were reminiscing on those little memories, you heard a door to the apartment open. looking towards it, you saw jeongin walk in. since you started tearing up thinking about yours and seungmins relationship, you quickly wiped them when jeongin came a little closer to you.

"y/n? oh my god! seungmin is so worried about you! you should go to him. like now." he looked genuinely concerned.

"y-yea i should haha," you looked towards the eggs cooking on the stove. "just make sure you keep on eye this food though. me and aerum woke up late so while she showered i figured i could make me and her some food. but i'm leaving now. also you guys should really go grocery shopping." you laughed at him while packing up your things.

he frowned at you and opened the fridge "hey it's not that b-maybe it is..."

aerum walked out of the bathroom wrapped up in a towel and looked at you wide eyed. she heard you talking to yourself so she decided to come out.

"damn babe" jeongin turned towards aerum and looked at her while raising his eyebrows.

"jeongin! what are you doing here! you weren't gonna be back until like...2...oh." she looked at the clock and now realized it was 3. "oh my god i'm gonna get fired!!"

"chill out aerum, i'm sure one day won't do anything" you chuckled at her over exaggeration.

"okay y/n listen," she went up to you and put her hands on your shoulders, staring you dead in the eyes. "you back in your apartment and be very clear to seungmin that you're sad and man and whatnot. be confident and don't cry." she pursed her lip at you.

"okay! got it. now go finish getting ready so you can leave before jeongin makes you stay!" you winked at her and left her apartment.

you were in front of your apartment door, giving yourself a pep talk about why you shouldn't be scared to go in there and confront seungmin. communication is key right?

you opened the door and were met with an empty house, no sign of seungmin anywhere. maybe he was sleeping? they didn't have any schedules today if you recalled correctly.

you walked towards your guys' shared bedroom and opened the door to be met with a sad sight. it was seungmin, curled up in the bed, holding onto your pillow. he seemed to be asleep and you didn't want to wake up him up. you were still mad at him, but the sight made your heart clench.

you went to your dresser and set your bag down. then you went to the bathroom to do your skincare routine since you hadn't gotten the chance to do so at aerums place. seems as though that woke seungmin up because next thing you know he's walking up to bathroom door that you forgot to close. you saw him behind you in the mirror.

"y/n?" he came closer to you and wrapped his arms around you. "i-i thought something happened to you when you left, i got really worried y'know..."

"well, i'm fine see? no need to worry." you unwrapped his arms from around your waist and stepped away from him. you appreciated the gesture but he's acting so normal, as if nothing happened between you two.

"oh...okay." he got the memo that you wanted to be left alone, so he left the bathroom. this time closing the door.

you were conflicted. you were mad at seungmin and he really hurt you. plus, the holidays were coming up and you didn't want to be in a sour mood for it. but at the same time, you could see he felt bad. him just initiating physical contact and being the first one to talk said a lot.

you see, both you and seungmin were both very prideful people. that means that when the two of you argued, instead of being normal and talking it out a few hours later. you guys stretched it on for 1-2 days before either of you came to apologize. communication was something your and seungmin's relationship was heavily lacking.

you decided that you would wait for seungmin to speak to you. and if he doesn't then well, you'll cross that bridge when you get there.

once you finished up in the bathroom, you made your way out to your bedroom and saw that seungmin was curled up on the bed with his phone.

"thought you had practice seungmin?" you crossed your arms and raised your brow.

"o-oh well you know i decided to skip today because i was so worried about you and i was waiting for you to come home." he made up an excuse.

"well im fine so, you should probably get going now." you patted his back and shooed him away.

you guessed that was his breaking point because then he turned around to face you with tears in his eyes and said

"y/n please...i'm sorry. i lied okay? i don't have any schedules or practice for the next whole week." he looked down in shame.

you already knew that so it wasn't that much of a shocker. but it really hurt coming from him.

"why would you lie to me seungmin?" tears were now starting to well up in your eyes. "i'm sorry if i rushed you into meeting my parents. it's just that we've been together for 2 years and you never got to see them except on calls so i thought it would be a nice trip for us...." you wiped your tears.

"no love trust me thats not the reason at all." he sat down next to you in the bed and took your face in his hands.

"so then why did you lie to me and call me clingy and annoying?" he winced when you mentioned what he called you. he really didn't mean to. he doesn't think that about you at all. it came out of nowhere.

"because y/n....i was scared to meet them. i thought that maybe they would think i wasn't good enough for you." he looked down in his lap.

"seungmin why on earth would you think that? my parents already love you and they've seen you on call. they practically adore you." you took his face in your hands now. "seungmin no one would ever think that about you. you're perfect in so many ways and you deserve me just as much as i deserve you, if not more."

"y/n how can you say that when i said all those things?" he was referring to when he called you clingy and annoying.

"because i know you didn't mean it baby. it did hurt a lot, but it's nothing you can't make up for." you smiled at him. "i know you've been a little stressed with all the end of year activities and stuff. but you're getting a break now! enjoy it."

"i just feel so guilty for lying to you and saying those things y/n, i truly am sorry. how can i make it up to you?" he looked at you wide eyed.

"cuddles and kisses. but we can do that after we pack since we're leaving in 2 days." you giggled.

seungmin pulled you by your waist into a hug and kissed the top of your head. "you know i love you a lot y/n, right?"

"yes i know that baby, i love you too" you smiled up at him. "now! lets get to packing!" you got up from the bed and started pulling clothes out of your drawers. seungmin groaned, not wanting to get up from the bed.

it was christmas eve and you and seungmin were at your parents house. they were thrilled to see him and loved him very much. not failing to make him feel very deserved.

you guys were all sitting in the living room and it was 11:30 pm. your parents decided they would go to sleep and give you two some alone time. you guy's both said goodnight and waited for them to leave until you started talking.

"so, having a good time so far?" you turned sideways to face seungmin.

"of course, the best time even." he smiled at you. "wanna watch home alone? i know it's your favorite and we didn't get to watch it back at home."

"yes! i'll go make some hot chocolate for us." you hopped off the couch and made your way to the kitchen to boil some milk.

it's been about five minutes and the milk was still boiling. seungmin came into the kitchen to keep you some company. he walked over to where you were by the stove and wrapped his arms around your waist from behind.

"could this thing be any slower?" he whispered right into your ear.

"ugh, i know right. i don't even care anymore," you turned off the stove. "we can have cold chocolate i guess." you started pouring the milk into yours and seungmins cups.

"anything is good when i'm with you." he kissed the side of your neck and swayed you side to side.

you giggled and turned around towards him and said "awww look at you being all flirty" you teased.

he shrugged his shoulders. "it's the christmas spirit i guess."

you then looked at the digital clock behind seungmin and it read 11:59.

"oh seungmin look!" you point behind him at the clock. "it's almost christmas! in five....four....three....t-"

he pulled your face towards him and brought you in for a kiss. he rested his hands on your hips and then pulled away. you looked up at him with wide eyes.

"man, i wish it was christmas everyday if you're gonna act like this"

he chuckled. "merry christmas y/n." he pulled you into his chest and rested his chin on your head.

"merry christmas seungmin."

[kindlespark]

this is gonna be SO long and rambly sorry anyway i saw a post abt how babel does queer characters and it got me thinking abt why the tropes it uses would usually turn me off other stories but didn’t here

MAJOR BABEL SPOILERS //

i feel like i’d be more mad abt how robinramy ended up in babel if it marketed itself as queer lit at all or if its fans were going “WOW AMAZING QUEER REP” abt it. but no one told me any of that, so finding out they were gay was just a fun little bonus surprise to me. i get why ppl are eh abt robinramy not getting together/technically still being subtext (which i dont think is really true btw like the book literally says “robin was falling in love” but idk i guess if you were stupid you might’ve assumed that it was falling in love with oxford given how romantic some of the other language is (WHICH IS ALSO THE POINT bc i think robin’s friendship with ramy blurring into romance is why he romanticised like all his friendships/experiences in oxford BUT IM GETTING OFF-TOPIC)). i just think robin’s repression abt being gay was intrinsically tied to his attitudes on imperialism (wrt refusing to acknowledge anything that complicated his life until it was too late) and i don’t consider it a cop out or queerbait. like i genuinely don’t think robinramy could ever have gotten together without drastic alterations being made in terms of plot and character. plus i think it’s clear that kuang didn’t want to write a story with any kind of focus on romance at all, because it’s not that kind of book. there’s no successful het romance either, so it grates a lot less. the only reason romance is included at all is to show the ways in which white entitlement manifests. so the tragic way robinramy played out just made sense to me.

and i speak as someone who accidentally spoiled myself on You Know What in the middle of reading and i was like ugghh boooo dreading it the whole time expecting to roll my eyes when it happened but then when it did i was like. wow im actually not that mad LMFAO 😭😭😭 actually thematically the book sets it up so well that i believed that this was unfortunately the only way it could’ve gone. babel is about the loss and tragedy and grief that colonised people experience. it’s about the lengths people will go to to uphold empire and the lengths ppl will go to to tear it down like idk 😭 i guess it is bury your gays but it didnt bother me this time because i thought it fit thematically ❤️ i enjoy tragedy as a genre a lot and i would’ve made it gay anyway you know. thanks rf kuang for doing it for me so i didnt have to.

WHICH IS ALL TO SAY that i guess if you’re going into babel for the queer rep without appreciating that the story is fundamentally a tragedy it would feel like it’s just reusing tired tropes….. but i think the choices kuang made were rly deliberate and not in a way that feels like trauma porn or shock value. the book is fundamentally about the struggles of poc so the layer of queerness that was introduced felt like a subtle extension of the experiences of characters of colour in the book, and i enjoyed and related to it as a queer chinese person who kind of realised they had to prioritise their fight for the liberation of poc over queerness mainly because the idea of western queer liberation cannot be dissociated from imperialism and many aspects of homophobia as we know it was an export of christian european empire into our colonised countries in the first place and FUCK THIS IS A WHOLE OTHER TANGENT ABOUT HOW I THINK RAMY AS A CHARACTER IS EMBLEMATIC OF THE TENSION AND STRUGGLE THAT QUEER POC DIASPORA HAVE BETWEEN OUR IDENTITIES GODDAMNIT OK FORGET IT POST CANCELLED i just rly think babel’s handling of queer characters is fine and makes sense and i like it personally and maybe i will make a coherent analysis about it one day but that day is not today byeeeeeee

[polyamorousmood]

hi! i'd love to get some sympathy/advice/etc from other ppl about this. so long story short my girlfriend (wonderful amazing great i am so happy with her) has a boyfriend, and i at first their rs was meant to be ephemeral, but then things changed and they realized they could make a longform commitment work out, so they tried! problem is, during the trial run, the guy realized poly wasnt working for him and he failed to communicate this well, so it caused a situation where he was very much just fishing for my partner to get in a closed rs with him. when she expressed how hurtful and wrong that was, he apologized and changed his behavior and after some more various ups and downs we've now settled into a pretty good situation where he's giving polyamory a serious try and seems sincerely committed to making it good! i trust my gf wholeheartedly and i want nothing but the best for them both, and for that brief period of time where it was ok we even had 3person dates and really special interactions, so i came to sincerely like guy a decent bit and i am cautiously but sincerely optimistic. however, by having to admit shit to himself, he's now of the mind that he'd like a much more segmented-off rs with my partner, which is fine, but also the resentment he felt towards not being able to have my gf all to himself made him lose his positive feelings towards me and now he expresses a (his words) 'goodwilled indifference' and we havent even Talked since he tried to effectively ultimatum my gf out of being poly. and that is just SO hurtful when i know i did absolutely nothing wrong to warrant the loss of what i felt was a genuinely precious and positive connection, and like, the first time ive had the chance to have a metamour! like as someone who really cares about learning how to admit fault i really cannot stress enough how much i didnt do jack shit here i was just vibing and trying to be nice and now it's just this sad thing i have to deal with. i know it has everything to do with his own preferences and insecurities and nothing to do with me, but i still feel a big child-like sense of betrayal and injustice and it makes me want to be mean and bitter and defensive ("well if you dont give a shit about me and wanna pretend i don't exist, then im gonna do the same! how do you like that, huh?" type beat). i know those feelings are to be worked with and worked through instead of acted upon, but it's still hard :-( i dont really miss *him*, really, i just miss not being in a polycule that has a member who struggles so much with polyamory. and though i trust her deeply, i am still sad and worried that this is a precarious situation that can end up hurting my partner and hampering her ability to feel free and happy in polyamory, which only adds to my mistrusting of the guy. anyone else in a similar situation, havin' to work with a poly-newbie metamour or something similar? im not crazy for getting bad vibes, despite my best hopes for them? thank you either way, i dont know enough poly people irl and ive been bursting with this shit for a bit so it helps even to just ramble it out

Yeah, I've been in similar places. Just putting the read more immediately because I don't have a good pithy introduction. But uh, TL;DRI guess? 🤷‍♀️: its totally fair for you to struggle with some negative feelings. But you are still in it together (even if he's pretending you don't exist) and the only way to the other side is through.

Its shitty, its exhausting, its infuriating. And it's all the more frustrating that you like... don't even WANT to be mad at him cause he DID apologize and now he IS trying to change the shitty parts, so you WANT to encourage that. Feels very

And it puts your mutual partner in the tough spot of having to balance⚖️ things between you two if he's unwilling to talk to you. And like, you're stuck waiting for him to come around, you can't even really DO anything, its all on HIM to prove he's not going to be an asshole forever.

And you kinda resent him for causing this much trouble basically all on his own! And then thinking he can still get all the good shit after stirring the pot! Like he tried to break you up and now you have to be the bigger person?? What kinda bullshit--

Fucking. Sucks.

I do have some advice, though as with most things, its not magic 🪄

🤬Be mad for a little bit! Allow yourself to feel it. You're not gonna wallow 🐖there, but let it hit you full force how much you dislike being in this bullshit situation. Maybe have a cry about it or throw some darts at his picture 🎯. Then, and only then,

Set it aside. Set the anger aside in your mind, set the situation aside in your discussions. Say "yup, sucks. Moving on..." and enjoy the good parts of your life.

As part of that, remember polyamory is a big ask for people who've never done it before. Him even just politely ignoring you is likely, in his mind, him compromising on everything he's believed in for years and the fundamentals of what his life will look like. That's a big deal. It's hard to do after there was previously a higher standard set, but try to give him some credit for that anyway. (Again. You are probably going to have to Be Mad first to be able to do this. That's okay. Don't skip ahead.)

I don't think having approximately the same attitude back is necessarily a bad strategy. Maybe don't do it with the petulance you presented in the ask 😝 but if you're able to just gently, non-judgmentally accept neutrality as a mode of operating with him... might save you a lot of trouble honestly🤷. Warmth is great and all, but I think it runs the risk of you burning out and feeling greater resentment down the line if it stays one sided (but you know yourself better than I do, so if you can handle it, power to you).

Know your feelings about this really well. Know what you're good with 👍, know what bothers you but you're willing to do for the good of the polycule😖, and know what really upsets you👎. Is this something you can make work long term? What changes would you need to have it work long term (including progress from him, accommodations from your partner, etc)?

Consider confronting him directly. You'll know better if that's actually a good idea in this situation than I will, but consider it. It may help you move past things to air your feelings, it may help him understand you better and vice versa, and it may lay the groundwork for a more functional relationship down the line. I must admit bias here. It is VERY important to me that things can be relaxed with my metas. The idea of refusing to engage with me feels like they're refusing to engage with the very concept of polyamory, and I that cannot work in my life - like, I run a poly blog you can guess how I value polyamory 😂 If you can be comfortable with something closer to parallel polyamory, this may be unnecessary.

And of course, through all of this, you have to talk to your partner. All of it. If you have a tendency to martyr yourself so as not to stress your partner out, overpower that tendency for this one. You are NOT doing your partner any favors by doing bottling it up. 🍾

For example, earlier I said your partner is going to have to balance things between you and your meta. It may be tempting to think you can spare her some of that by shrinking your feelings and needs, so maybe you'll just bite your tongue. However, she has to do the work anyway, and forcing her to work with incomplete information actually makes the balancing that much harder. While you shouldn't harp on them about it, she should know where you're at in all this. You owe your partner the ability to make informed decisions, and your happiness and ability to sustain a certain set-up is going to be an important factor to them! Tell them your misgivings, tell them if its going to take you some time to forgive him his bullshit, tell them if you are okay with something in the short term but don't know if you can spring it long term, tell them if you need a break from thinking about the whole damn situation. (And of course, as always, tell your partner when something feels good or is going well 😊)

It can be recovered. It will require patience. Hang in there. 🤗 I admire your commitment to figuring it out, and it sounds like you have a splendid partner who is just as committed to making it workable. I'm rooting for you all 💙💖🖤

[aeirithgainsborough]

i just finished playing parts 1 and 2 of tlou for the first time and, as someone who has grown to love joel and ellie very much within the span of 72 hours and found their characterization in pt 2 to be straight up bizarre, your takes on the game are a godsend. the rage in my heart cannot be extinguished but it can be soothed. thank u for ur service 🫡

you’re welcome!! it’s baffling to me how many people seem to have mindlessly taken it all in, just letting themselves be force fed some bullshit morality tale with no thought cus… yeah it’s bad ajsjjs. the gameplay is good although a little repetitive since it’s more open, the graphics are stunning, and as a disabled person who can struggle with games sometimes the accessibility is next level. they definitely get credit for that!

but the narrative is terrible. for a start it’s chock full of contrivances. abby happens to find tommy and then when she’s looking for him after making a FOURTEEN DAY JOURNEY across a dangerous world she gets into trouble and who should save her but joel! who then runs into a lodge unarmed with a group of strangers after 20 years of being on his guard. and then ellie runs into the room too unarmed despite the noises she can hear coming from it, even though she took on david and his cronies at 14 and got the better of them lol? then they all travel another FOURTEEN DAYS no problems, they find who they need in a huge city, ellie leaves a handy map for abby to find her. it’s absurd. one or two contrivances i can ignore but when you’re that reliant on them for your plot it’s not good writing!

then there’s ellie ‘im scared to end up alone’ ‘you’re the only person to never leave me and id be more scared without you’ williams. a girl who lost her best friend/first love traumatically and had a whole ‘let’s make the most of the time we have left’ thing with her… and she doesn’t speak to the most important person in her life for 2 years?? not my ellie lmao. i can see her being mad. i can see her being cold to him. I can see that relationship being different bcus of joel’s lie. i can’t see her going cold turkey whilst living on the same property as him for that long. i can’t see her never asking him for a proper explanation in that time. she leaves everything behind eventually despite her fears and how important the notion of family is to her. bye dina and jj. and then at the end… it’s pointless! she didn’t even get her revenge after becoming unrecognisable, leaving her loved ones behind, and killing a slew of people to get there. nor does she develop lol AT ALL. at 14 she had survivors’s guilt and was ready to sacrifice her life bcus of that and a belief her life doesn’t matter and then at 19 she’s the same! there’s no lightbulb moment where she’s like OH my life does matter it does have value none of my friends’ deaths were my fault and i don’t need to die for absolution. there’s no moment she realises why joel saved her. she’s stagnant. it’s so miserable. and it haunts me what we could have had if joel hadn’t been killed off for torture porn shock value. if they’d had to go on some journey with their relationship cold and not As It Was and along the way ellie has that understanding that her life DOES matter. ‘no one wants the same story they played in tlou blah blah boring’ LOL YES?? ellie and joel are why ppl loved part 1 and that’s why they had to lie so much in the lead up to the game and marketing. ‘this is a story about joel and ellie that’s why we decided not to have it about new characters’ lie ‘we love joel and ellie and we’re going to treat them with respect’ lie, plus aging joel and ellie up in the trailers and inserting joel into the trailer in a way that made ppl think they were going on a journey. it was a deliberate lie to make ppl who wanted more joel and ellie buy the game and they told it for a reason. and besides there’s a difference between ‘i just met you and i don’t like you rn but slowly im gonna love you’ and ‘i love you but i don’t much like you’ and that difference is actually fascinating and could have been used to rlly good effect instead of… all those stupid contrivances and torture porn!

and then there’s joel lmao. even the opening when he says ‘i saved her’ is so funny his expression his tone it’s literally disney/marvel villain sjsjsjd i cannot take it seriously. beyond that there’s such a dissonance between a) what actually happens in part 1 and what they say in part 2 and b) the violent world they’ve put him/us in and then asked us to get across in one piece with a kid in part 1 and how he’s then judged for that in part 2. ‘get this kid across the country but when WE make it so you’re attacked in every chapter and have to defend yourself/ellie we are going to say joel is a cruelly violent man’ ‘get this kid across the county without letting her die when you’re attacked pls and btw in part 2 we are going to say you taught her violence and corrupted her’ never mind that it’s impossible joel could have done the job in the world THEY created and then punished us for acting accordingly in, but also that he doesn’t even give her a gun until using one makes her sick and it’s not a fun toy to her. and even then it’s for emergencies. he never attacks first, he only defends. and they made it that way! that specific world is useless in moralising to us about violence bcus of that dissonance. none? of? us? can? help? it? ‘be violent when ur attacked or you’ll die and can’t progress the story but we are gonna punish and villainise and demonise you for it in part 2’ ‘kill hundreds of people and dogs, torture people, but did you know violence is bad actually??’. ABSURD. and in that hospital joel was NOT the aggressor. honestly the whole thing would have worked better if abby’s revenge had been for pointless violence. but from the point we know him joel is never violent until they are attacked first. that’s inarguable fact. even tommy in part 2 tells ellie joel wouldn’t have gone to seattle for revenge if it had been one of them! it’s been a long time since he did terrible things and im not saying that makes it ok (except he’s hot and not real so idc) BUT that aside the point is, he doesn’t go looking for it, and it’s never pointless anymore. but he’s the Big Bad Evil who deserves to die like a dog and we know you all love joel but we’re gonna make you hear it and watch it and also in the whole game we are gonna make him the punching bag we are not even going to ONCE let him open his mouth and explain what really happened in that hospital and why he saved ellie (yeah he’s so terrible for not letting a suicidal 14yr old kill herself)! which rlly brings us back round to the dissonance cus they’ve ALL done shitty stuff to survive including abby but she’s gonna be the one to ‘stop horrible evil villain joel in his tracks’ when he’s been living quietly in jackson for 5 years and she’s gonna get her revenge and then after get a happy hopeful ending all to show us violence and revenge is bad which a) falls flat bcus what? revenge makes you lose everything and end up alone except not for abby! and b) she’s objectively just as awful if not more so than joel but she’s the one who has to stop him and gets a nice redemption arc with a hopeful happy ending and joel has to die! abby:

shows great pleasure in slowly torturing joel and then killing him brutally

does the above in front of his screaming kid who’s being held down and forced to watch even though just finding her dad’s body is traumatising for her

is in an authoritarian militia who is intent on wiping out anyone else out in seattle lol?

kills people for that militia including kids

after torturing joel and killing him is so deeply unaffected by it she laments the fact she hasn’t got time to torture some seraphites who are chained up in cells

kills jessie when he’s unarmed cus she rlly learnt violence and revenge was so awful and took everything from you. wait, no, only ellie had to learn that lesson and end up alone. she also shoots and injured tommy!

once again shows sadistic pleasure in the idea of killing when she’s about to slit dina’s throat. this pleasure is bcus she’s pregnant so again yeah she rlly was so affected by her violence and revenge lmao.

never shows any great remorse beyond a throwaway line, meanwhile ellie loses absolutely everything including her fingers and joel, peacefully minding his business in jackson is the villain who deserves to brutally die and even after he’s dead he’s further villanised by the narrative lol even tho he was right to kill jerry fuck that man!

it’s just completely nonsensical! not only are they moralising to us in a world that doesn’t suit it, but they can’t even do it well!

it’s also just relentless misery and torture porn. kill all these ppl kill these dogs watch joel die horribly beat ellie up as the person who killed him even though you love her and are attached to her (really struggle to understand where im meant to find empathy for abby during this, esp after jessie and then the whole dina bit) watch ellie lose her family lose her fingers and end up alone which was her greatest fear. don’t even get me started on the section that posits ellie as a david figure down to gameplay mechanics and the theatre set up which is beyond vile when he tormented her when she was a fucking kid and the voice actor has talked about how he was going to r*** her. it’s vile enough that they took the first lesbian protagonist of an AAA game and tortured her for 25 hours straight and turned her into the villain but to also position her as her own fucking predator is straight up horrific. cus that’s not a stereotype in the lgbt community… as an aside, troy saying joel is the same as david is the stupidest thing ive ever heard and he should shut up forever.

on top of all that the game is homophobic, transphobic and racist. neil got the idea when he fantasised about killing palestinians in revenge… yikes. you can even see how the conflict between the wlf and the seraphites mirrors what’s going on in palestine. it’s actually a plot that’s very similar to an early iteration of tlou1 that was stopped cus... it didn’t make sense for anyone in that world to travel when it’s so dangerous just to get revenge ajsjsjs come back bruce! (ppl like to forget he was integral to part 1)

this game doesn’t respect the characters, it doesn’t respect the world, and it sure as heck doesn’t respect us. it takes the ambiguity from the end of part 1 which made it SO great and rips it to shreds. instead of being allowed to make our own minds up they ram down our throats that joel was completely wrong in the way they punish him through the narrative and ellie (the ellie part just makes it worse :/). goodbye nuance goodbye grey area. the reaction to it from gamers who hail it as a narrative masterpiece and love abby whilst arguing joel is a villain who deserved to die show what propaganda was invented for actually! and then ppl have the audacity to say if you don’t like the game you’re a homophobic woman hater with no depth or nuance ITS LAUGHABLE.

i found the experience of playing the game so genuinely traumatic it was that full of torture porn but the good news is the further out i get from playing the game the better it gets. i haven’t cried for days and days about it which is a record!! and at that point it gets so much easier to disengage from part 2 and just enjoy the actual masterpiece part 1 was.

[doyouevenshipbr0]

another live action ATLA rant. who’s shocked.

so im seeing a lot of ppl saying things defending the show, and whatever, fine. i agree with some. this show is NOT all bad. not even close.

the one defense i CANNOT get behind is “the people that dont like it are mad they made changes and mad its not a complete copy of the original”. do not get me wrong, i am completely aware that i (and many others) had a bias coming into this. everyone loves the original show. so many of us are very protective and dont want to see changes, bc why change something that was perfect to begin with.

however, no fucking shit they were gonna make changes. duh. wtf would be the point of this if they werent gonna change ANYTHING.

just bc i/other people don’t like some of the changes, that doesn’t mean we dont have valid critiques and were just mad at the idea of any types of changes.

i, and many other people, really enjoyed some of the changes. everyone loves the kiyoshi addition. ive seen people praising the zuko saving his crew plot line (and i completely agree). from what ive seen, most people like that azula is in the show already (ive seen people hating on her actress tho which is 1 nuts bc she did an awesome job and 2 stemming from misogyny/pedophilia but thats besides the point). everyone loves the scene w lu ten’s funeral (personally i dont care for this one bc i think the show was showing iroh’s cards way too early. they clearly know hes a fan fav and they wanted to show the best of him from the very start. which i dont think is fair to his character.)

but anyways, point is, there were a handful of things this adaptation changed that people really like!!! me included!!!!!!!!

so when i see stuff like “people are being pessimistic and miserable and hating on the fact that its not exactly the same” (paraphrasing) i get so frustrated bc that is SO not true. im not just looking to hate something.

ur telling me, if u didnt watch the show beforehand, u wouldn’t have thought that omashu episode was a fucking mess? like genuinely. try ur hardest to think about this show as a standalone piece of work, like u suggest all the haters should do, and think about that episode. u would be so confused by the whirlwind of seemingly pointless character/plot dumping. like teo and his dad, jet and the freedom fighters, bumi, and the cave of two lovers stuff? why in gods name would alllllll of that be going on at one time? like that is just one example of the changes being messy. but when u have prior knowledge of the show, ur like “oh! thats jet! yeah i know him.” but in the context of the new show he is so removed from everything other than katara and has like 6 mins of screen time, and his presence feels so forced and near pointless (ok yeah he helped katara w her bending for like a sec).

yes i am a hater, but im not gonna hate the show (which i rly dont hate the show anyways) just for the fact that there is change!

but yes i am gonna hate when they changed something and the change is worse, or illogical, or messy, or pointless. which a LOT of these changes were.

[rachelcommitscrimes]

im gonna rant abt how much i hate the ghost eyes fandom (as a former fan) bc im just kinda mad rn

so uhh yeah major TW for s3lf h4rm, romanticizing mental illness, su1c1de, sadomasochism, infantilization, and rlly just anything related to that

(also sorry if this looks weird idk how to separate stuff on tumblr)

also DO NOT harass the creator or anyone mentioned here, you’re no better than them if you do that

——————————————————————————

ok so i read ghost eyes like 2 years ago but i stopped reading about the point where they were on that field trip. i still think it’s a nice comic and i’m sure the author is a cool person, also the art style is awesome. but the fandom is so fucking gross that i’m surprised more people haven’t talked about it. 

for some backstory on this, i used have REALLY bad depression and was cutting myself regularly (i’m much better now, i have medication, therapy, and i’m almost a year clean) i also stopped reading due to the comic severely damaging my mental health and i’m very glad i did. i was younger and immature and thought i could handle such content. this led to me becoming extremely obsessed with the comic to an unhealthy level, and getting severely attached to one of the characters (rudy) because i could relate to him at that time. i seriously thought that i WAS him sometimes.

i understand now that i should NOT have ignored the label and what i did was definitely wrong and if the creator is reading this i deeply apologize. i’m in a much better place now and i’m just glad that i was able to get the help i needed.

ok now to the angry part

if you don’t know what ghost eyes is, it’s a webcomic about a severely traumatized boy attending school for the first time and meeting a bunch of other severely traumatized kids. this comic has a crap ton of triggering/sensitive/disturbing topics (which is not a bad thing as long as you do it right) and like i said before, the creator has kindly put a warning before the comic starts stating that you SHOULD NOT romanticize/idolize/sexualize/kin any of the characters, do not read unless you can handle such topics, and so forth. now i know i should have definitely put the comic down before and not gotten obsessed over it, but i knew damn well enough that it was messed up to romanticize/sexualize any of the characters/things that happened in the book.

there are several scenes in which a character is self harming or harming someone else, and the comments will say shit like “nooo my poor bean” “awww baby don’t do that” or my personal favorite “protect the smol bean.” first of all, the characters are like 16-17, second of all, i cannot even tell you how fucked up it is that people see someone ruining their lives and putting themselves in danger and think it’s “cute” or “anxiety smol bean uwu” THERES LITERALLY A SCENE WHERE SOMEONE IS GETTING STABBED AND PPL ARE DRAWING THIS MF IN A MAID DRESS.

another reason i despise these fans is that they see an abusive relationship and start making ships/kinning them. as someone who has gone through pretty much everything rudy has gone through, i cant tell you how irritating it is to see people shipping him with his abuser or calling him a “cutie patootie masochist boi uwu” cause lemme tell you what-it doesnt feel good to have to put your health in danger and ruin your relationships with others just so you can get off somehow. ITS NOT FUN. the whole point of rudy’s character is to not romanticize someones fucked up mental health.

i could spend hours talking about this group of immature brats, but i’m tired and it’s a school night and i have a test tomorrow. i might add on if i feel like i need to but overall i really hope those immature fans grow up and realize their mistakes like i did, or get the help they need.

[transfemlogan]

ok so obviously my mental health has been super fucking bad. um. for monthd jts been terrible so this is less me ranting abt sanders sides & more me having a mental break but were gonna ignore that bcuz im upset

i fucking HAAATE sanders sides fans who will defend thomas 2 the fucking death. im losing my mind.

i just saw someone say that janus acting onw way in svs & acting completely different in the grwm vid is "added depth 2 his character" . i acknowledge that character depth can be subjective but 4 the love of fucking god no it is not. that is not added depth.

character depth makes a character NOT one dimensional. current janus is VERY MUCH ONE DIMENSIONAL. he fits in2 a single trope, he does not stray from that trope. everything about him is TOLD to us, not shown. and i get that we havent actually seen him in canon sasi vids bcuz thomas cant do his job & its been 4 fucking years but holy hell. current janus is the "sassy gay man". hes the "bitchy & mean villain who doesn't care about anyone around him". he fits into THAT ONE TROPE. & does not have a DIMENSIONAL BONE IN HIS BODY. he is a remy fucking COPYCAT.IM SO MAD

svs janus while not perfect had some sort of fucking depth. janus has strayed so far from his original character that he is not the same fucking character. if u put svs janus & current janus in a room 2gether i think svs janus would kill the other.

and it SUCKS EVEN MORE. WHEN PPL CLAIM THAT A CHARACTER BEING OOC CANT BE "TRUE" IF THE "CREATOR IS WRITING 4 THEM" could u fucking imagine. imagine reading a book & the main character switches personalities midway thru w/o plot development & acts nothing like the og & the author just goes "what? its fine its my charafter i can write them 2 b how ever i want."

like 1: you obviously have never written anything in ur fucking life b4 if u think writers cant fuck up their own characters. but 2: if you ARE a writer i am EMBARRASSED. AND WORRIED FOR YOUR FUTURE WORKS. i am embarrassed for you. thats embarrassing.

its one thing 2 claim that thomas' writing is good (its not this guy cannot write) & adds depth 2 his characters (no it fucking doesnt do you KNOW. WHAT CHARACTER DEPTH IS.) but then 2 add "well actually um its his characters so who cares if its bad"

critical thinking is dead. media literacy is dead. your brains have been rotted so much 2 the point where u r a fucking idiot. i cant do this anymore. go outside & touch grass. i have 2 leave this fsndom again

[jemmo]

For the ask game: 14?

thank you sm for the ask ☺

14. bl you think is underrated

ooh this is a tricky one, bc i can definitely tell you what i think is overrated (but thats not the question...), plus im always gonna think my favourites are underrated bc everyone should love them but i digress. i wanna highlight 3 shows/things bc the first one is a short series and then a movie and thats his. idk if it's bc its a few years old now but when i watched this show and then the film i just adored it. first of all, the show is the perfect kind of chill watch where not really much happens and yet a lot happens?? thats how me and my sister affectionately describe our favourite kind of shows bc they deal in the normal and everyday and manage to make it seem huge and beautiful and this series does that with one of my favourite tropes that i love to see crop up in j-bls which is an escape to the beach (and later the countryside), plus the show has the most awesome and well done early 2000s aesthetic that just fills me with nostalgia. but the film is a whole other thing. it pulls an old fashioned cupcake/cherry magic and gives us adults but unlike them shows us a story that is very grounded and real and serious, like they really said lets take this bl and actually make it a story about parenting and what a family can be and show just how complicated it all is and sometimes there is no winning and thats life. god its just beautiful, and theres still a deep and meaningful love story at the heart of it. just go watch it now if you haven't, or rewatch it if you haven't for a while.

second im picking eien no kinou and im prefacing this by saying i get why less people talk about this bc its not fun and some people dont wanna watch a story they know will be sad, but its also so important that it exists and i think it touches on some really tough topics and manages to tell them beautifully. and bc i havent seen much of what ppl say about this, idk what any consensus takes are but i felt very emotional watching this through the lens of erasure of queer relationships when it comes to loss, how sometimes when people aren't out or cant share their relationship, they become lost, or invisible, when someone is lost. and i mean... the queer experience is all-encompassing and such grief is something that should also be talked about when queerness can affect that process in a specific way, and while i dont think its easy to watch or revisit, its nevertheless important and beautiful

ive talked about some more heavy shows so i'm ending with if its with you, which is recent but even i pushed it to the side a little bc i liked i cannot reach you so much, but this show is kinda like the opposite to the ones above. i feel like people like a middle ground in their shows between drama and comfort, so while people dont talk as much about serious or sad shows, they also dont talk about the shows that are just nice. and this show is just that, bc its all about teaching someone thats had a bad experience that there is simple kindness in the world and its so heart-warming. i'll never forget the way ryuuji responded in that last ep when amane got nervous around the other kids, how he thought it would be this big think that he'd be mad about bc that's what happens in every show, but ryuuji was just like yeah its ok i understand and im not mad. just the pure kindness this show has to people feeling the way they feel is so refreshing and beautiful and it captures the high school simplicity of it all in a way that makes you step back as someone older and think huh yeah it really is just that easy, its just about happiness.

anyway, between this and the last response, i think by j-bl bias is jumping out a bit too much but thats the end of my rant, thank you for coming to my ted talk

❤️🧡💛bl ask game💚💙💜

[maddy-ferguson]

im tired of ppl using headcanon stuff as proofs on the show. ''mike never stopped calling will.'' yeah no, that is not canon at all, lmao. you guys just took dustin's words and used it as some sort of a canon thing to prove that mike called. c'mon guys... canonically it doesnt make much sense anyways bc it doesnt fit. because mike learned abt joyce's job at the beginning of the season after el sent her letter. unless the duffers just made a mistake and screwed the time, it doesn't make any sense for mike to have called will constantly or 'complaining' due to joyce's job when he just learned abt joyce's job at the beginning of the season after reading el's letters. for all we know mike didnt send any letters to will, and they just only talked for a couple of times. like. that's the canon. we cannot just take something and treat it as canon and come up with criticism based on that. same as the 'lettergate' situation, for all we know mike just didnt bother writing and he didnt have a present. also u cannot really blame will either. for all he knew, the situation was just a repeat of S3. and we know what happened in S3. just a casual 'what if u wanna join another party' doesn't fix the issue at hand, and it literally didnt either. so.

okay, yes, this is what i was saying in the tags of this and what this post i reblogged earlier is about!!! you can't just say "mike 100% called and we don't even know if will called so will is equally to blame for the fact that they didn't keep in touch/for their rink o mania fight". i mean you can but i'll disagree every time because there's this little thing that happened between them that never got resolved that totally explains why will would be hesitant to reach out...who out of the two of them was rebuffed the last time he tried to show that this friendship was important to him? who was crying in the rain and calling himself stupid over it? as a very wise woman once said, i would've wanted mike to make a little bit of an effort too after that tf

and the thing is, if it turns out mike didn't call/doesn't have any unsent letters i'm not gonna be mad at him? they both have reasons for not reaching out. people being more forgiving of will probably has to do with the fact that his reasons are you know. not speculation

as for the technicalities surrounding the theory, the job part of it just doesn't add up to me like i...have spent a very long time thinking about it, it's april and i still don't get it. and as people have pointed out el can't use the phone and there's a walkie talkie in her room and all that but yk. idk. and i like lettergate and i like mikeactuallycalledgate but at the end of the day they're just theories you know

[hoonvrs]

We fr like this babes🤞

I CANNOT live a day with the worry of an argument it stresses me out so much

Alr not to vent but ive seen most ppl have this friend that they just cant say no to. Like its IMPOSSIBLE.

I have a friend like that, shes legit my closest friend. I have this trauma from like 3 years ago, she randomly just some day went "i dont wanna be friends with you anymore, r***a gives you too much attention." The girl i just metioned, my closest friend and i are a trio (theyre literally my closest friends). Back on topic HOW TF IS IT MY FAULT SHE GIVES ME TOO MUCH ATTENTION. But i was too distracted by the fact she didnt wanna be friends anymore that I didnt even realize how logicless it was. We had been friends for about 4 years back then (7 now) and i was DEVASTATED. No thats an understatement.

I was so sad that I went to my mum and cried to her for an hour straight.

After that she lowkey became controlling. Whenever i did something she didnt like, shed block me unannounced and wouldnt even tell me what pissed her off. Her anger issues are off the boundaries till today. She gets mad at the littlest of things. When i dont do something she wants she goes on to persuade me by telling me shed tell a certain someone my secrets or block me everywhere etc.

But till this day i cant unfriend her because first of all, im too scared to. Shed get all annoyed and talk behind my back shit. Secondly, forget the first one I just CANT. Whenever i wanna think of unfriending her i just get reminded of all the fun times we had all these years and end up with tears.

Besides all that, youd be surprised to believe she has been one of my best friends ever. Nobody would believe me. But in reality i love her too much to let go if

(IM SO SORRY FOR THE RANT I WAS FEELIN A LIL EMOSH TODAY 😭😭😭)

-🌜

DW ABOUT THE RANT BAE IDM

i can’t relate in the sense that my bsfs and me are a trio too but honestly ur friend sounds so toxic

i get you guys have had good times that makes u hesitate but if she’s able to get prissy and block you over her own problems and insecurities it’s really not worth it bae. no one who loves you would put you in a position where you question theyre friendship and contemplate unfriending them

and if she chats shit let her😭 people are gonna talk behind ur back regardless and i don’t wanna be the instigator here but do u really think she’s quiet whenever she gets upset or jealous and blocks you? i just think the cons outfight the pros cause no amount of good times can cover the fact that she’s genuinely stressed you out over ur friendship js cause she doesn’t wanna grow up

PEOPLE WHO CAN TAKE NO ARE THE WORRSSTTT the amount of arguments and growth i’ve had to go through with my friends rn over the last 8 years i’ve known them is crazy🫠 but sometime people need to be confronted and if ANYBODYY can’t take criticism from their best friend trust me they’ll nvr change🫥

BUT you never know, idk how old you are but friend groups and bsfs either grown into each other or out of it, it’s just life and part of it. js trust that you will grow and learn from it just try and protect ur peace

anyways i hope i don’t come off aggressive or sumn😭 im an argumentative bitch who will start an argument with anyone so ik not everyone is like me but hopefully it all ends well for u bae🫂 u deserve better

[blackvail22]

i cannot help but become irritated when im near her. i know that is a toxic thing to say; i know its unhealthy for me. it just... happens

i tried to have a good day today because i was going out with my sister and b-i-l for my birthday and eating later with my whole immediate family. i did have fun! we bowled for 2hrs, went to a japanese bakery and got my birthday cake n some more treats, and i went to get milk tea.

everything was fine until i was near my mom.

i dont know what it is about her, but whenever im away from her for hours n i come back home, it just.... i just get so irritated.

i try to not talk so i dont get her irritated, but that always makes her go "aww, is someone mad?" or "why are you so pissed off for no reason" or gives me a look that shows shes seeing red.

on the way home from dinner, my parents were talking about a house that someone moved out of; they each gave different addresses for the house. my mom *insisted* she was correct, and--even though my dad literally said he may be wrong n doesnt rlly care abt the address--kept arguing that my dad was wrong and upset.

one thing abt my mom that i despise: EVERY SINGLE TIME you "irritate her soul" she will rant abt how much she hates you and at the end WITHOUT FAIL says "fucking trash bag bitch". what comes after that depends on the person... for me she'll say "fucking trash bag bitch, youre so fucking [r slur]" and for my dad she'll say "fucking trash bag bitch, child molesting mother fucker". there is one thats universal though which is "fucking trash bag bitch, i hope you fucking die"

oh! another thing abt that, SHE WILL LITERALLY SAY THAT ABT RANDOM PPL SHE SEES ON THE STREET AND ARE MINDING THEIR FUCKING BUSINESS

anyway, back to my story! while she was arguing w my dad (after telling me theyre not arguing) she said her signature line i stated above.

my dad went into the gas station after she said that to him and heres where i come in!

she was ranting to me "your dad get so upset over every little thing"

i said "well, you do that too"

she said "no he's just mad cuz he's wrong....he never fucking listens..."

*dad comes back to the car with 3 cigarette packs instead of 2 (my dad went into the gas station 4 my mom)*

"...again, he never fucking listens! he just hears what he wants to hear"

"yeah, i dont rlly want to listen to you rn. plus, all you said was 'cigarettes' you didnt say an amount"

"yes i did! i said '2 cigarettes'"

me: "no u only said 'cigarettes'"

mom: "dad, why are you mad?"

"because you keep going on abt something that doesnt matter to me!"

"no, its because youre wrong. youre all mad because youre wrong"

"no im not!"

*i look at the house through maps and tell them the correct address*

mom: "[my first name] shut the fuck up before you become homeless because youre getting real close"

dad: "stop fucking saying that! youre not kicking my daughter outm regardless, shes never gonna be fucking homeless"

*we get home*

dad: "i forgot to get smth to drink because of you"

mom: "yeah, you can get one of those little bottles [of alcohol] like you do every night" (my dad is a recovered alcoholic)

i told her she was irritating 🧍

she said "move tf out then"

i said "im trying to" (because i am)

im sitting in my room now wanting to scream, cry, fight. i feel so fucking .... tense. i feel tense. im so tired of having to deal with my mom. as much as living w a man by myself (even my dad) scared tf out of me, im so tempted to move into his tiny ass apartment and sleep in the living room. i cant live her anymore!!!

me n my friend have been talking abt getting an apartment/go apartment searching after i recover from my procedure that im having next week.

i need to room w her. i need to live w someone that doesnt fucking hate me! i need to save up every paycheck im having. even tho i go on a vacation end-october, im moving out and im going low-contact w my mom. i cannot deal w her anymore. i will get my license in a month/month-half time. im determined. i need to do anything to get away from her

[faehelmet]

i CANNOTTTTT stand on/ion/thief im sorry i dont understand what people see in the character. like i mean i DO (i have a fair share of favs who are assholes!) and i dont blame onion fans i just... find it VERY hard to understand how somebody can like this guy. (going under a read more bc i dont want ppl’s dash to be clogged with my bullshit LOL)

like okay i played x/yx’s route first and like, him making a couple shitty comments towards x/yx was like... okay you’re a hardass, but you’re funny, so i GUESS i’ll let it go. and then i played n/ight/owl’s route.

and it’s like...i cannot be nice about this guy are you KIDDING me? him treating owl like an idiot even though we are WELL aware owl is actually...yknow...trying his best, and trying to cope with a lot of issues alongside the pressure of exams is one thing, PLUS owl being seen as nd BY THE DEV... the comments left a bad taste in my mouth already. and then onion goes and calls owl a freak for... having a mental breakdown. that did it for me. like YES owl said a lot of hurtful things, and onion has a right to be angry i’m not gonna fault him for that. but “FREAK”? there is zero attempt to see things from owl’s side (despite them being friends...?) and even when q/uest says that onion wasn’t exactly helpful in that situation onion just goes “whatever” and like...

that WHOLE scene makes me mad i’m sorry. it’s not that it’s not handled well, it is! it’s just that onion’s like... everything. him airing out owl’s dirty laundry to the whole server (granted, for all we know the server could be aware already, but regardless it was shitty to just bring that up in a general chat while already going after him), and making those unnecessary comments towards him even after he goes through a mental break i just.. i cannot stand this guy.

we get like... a slight apology from him in the good end of owl’s route. (can’t say anything about the bad ending because i cannot bring myself to play through it sorry lol) aside from that? i’m not seeing much hard evidence that he feels remorse for half the shit he says or the way he is. he’s just an asshole and he seems content being that way. and, yknow, i dont see onion as some...really malicious character; there’s a lot to be said about how him and owl have similar struggles and how this likely contributed to onion’s pisspoor reaction to owl...showing symptoms of mental issues lmao. (saw a REALLY good post abt it actually)

but, regardless, it’s soso hard for me to sympathize with someone who just refuses to understand why mental breakdowns happen, how neurodivergency can affect your focus, just... a lot of brain-related shit seems to fly over his head. and it’s FINE to not know, but there was no excuse for some of the shit he said in the game especially towards owl. there’s ignorance, and then there’s just being an asshole. and for me, onion crossed that line verrrry early into owl’s route.

uhm idk how to end this. i hope to god this doesn’t show up in the bp tags i don’t want my negativity showing up there LOL again i don’t want to shame anyone i’m just very very angry at a fictional character and had to express it. goodnight

[katsumiiii]

When they’re mad at you

Katsuki Bakugou x gn! poc reader

Eijirou Kirishima x gn! poc reader

Denki Kaminari x gn! poc reader

Katsuki Bakugou

katsuki and mad go hand in hand

whenever you see his ass he’s always mad about something

and if he’s not...

well either you’re dreaming or he’s sleep

either way he’d probably still be mad tbh

but let’s say you got him actually upset

like ACTUALLY pissed

whew chile I pray for everyone in that room

so you and katsuki were in the common room arguing

both of y’all are throwing jabs below the belt bc you guys are petty af

“you think you can be a hero with that shitty attitude?”

“at least I have a strong fucking quirk, I don’t even know how your ass got in this school. fucking extra.”

anyways, you’re not showing it but katsuki is low key hurting your feelings

ofc you aren’t gonna let him know that

soooo you say something slightly outta pocket

“right so my quirk is ass, but aren’t you the one who got kidnapped....twice? oh alright.”

the look in his eyes is heartbreaking

and although he tries to hide it, it’s pretty obvious that you hurt him

“you know what, fuck off. if you come anywhere near me ill fucking kill you.”

and he stomps off

now everyone’s looking at you like you fucked up

“oh so he can be an asshole to me, but when im one back it’s an issue?? you know what mind y’all fucking business.”

now you’re even more upset bc everyone was taking his side

you hide out in your room for a while, thinking about everything

you then realize that what you said was triffling

“damnit!”

you try everything to get him to talk to you again

but he won’t even acknowledge your  existence

everytime you try to go up and talk to him he acts like you’re not even there

“katsuki listen, can I-”

“shitty hair, come one let’s go fucking work out or some shit.”

okaayyyy guess you have to try again

“babe I know you’re pissed but-”

“DEKU!! BRING YOUR ASS OVER HERE!”

oh, so he’d rather talk to Izuku

the disrespect

but you know you fucked up so you don’t stop trying

and eventually get him to talk to you again

“katsuki please, just fucking talk to me.”

“the fuck do you want?”

you’re elated, I mean he’s never fully ignored you before

plus you miss the cuddles, and food

especially the food

“im sorry babe, I was pissed at the stuff you were saying and I wanted to hit you where it hurt. I made you some hot ramen to let you know I’m really sorry.”

he looked you up and down, his face in that same goofy ass sneer

“tch, fine I forgive you or whatever. but im not eating this shit. it doesn’t even look edible.”

“are you crazy?! the packets are good as fuck babe.”

“YOU BOUGHT ME THE SHITTY PACKET?!”

Eijirou Kirishima

what the fuck did you do to possibly make this boy mad?

I mean seriously

you really had to fuck up in order for him to even be remotely pissed

I don’t wanna talk about it

but we gon talk about it OKAY

so you was in the kitchen searching for something to drink

at the top of the fridge, you see a bottle of cranberry juice right next to kirishima’s premium crimson riot protein powder

so being the smart bitch you are, you decide to climb up on top of the counter top to get your cranberry juice

“fuck why is it up so high?”

you stick your tongue out in concentration trying to get your juice

and finally you grab it

while also knocking over kirishima’s premium crimson riot protein powder

“oh shit.”

“Y/N?! ARE YOU OKAY? WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?!”

your baby walking in with his hair down looking all confused

he then looks down at the floor, noticing the powder pooling into the cracks of the tile

he looks at you

you look at him

he looks back down at the floor

then right back at you

“heyyyyy babyyyy.”

“what the fuck?”

he bites his lip in agitation, trying not to yell

“I spent hours in line for that babe.”

“I know....sorry?”

he literally could not look at you, so he turned around and left

“fuck! great job Y/N.....least I got my cranberry juice.”

the next couple of days he was visibly different

unresponsive, not as smiley

“he’s really mad at me over some stupid protein powder....”

bakugou would not stop staring you down

mentally telling you to fix this shit or he would skin you alive

yeah not gonna happen

so you trot your ass to the store

sighing at the long ass line in front of you

“fucking god.”

eventually you manage to get the powder, placing it in his room for when he gets back from training

the next day kirishima runs over to you, kissing you repeatedly on the face

“THANK YOU BABE!! IT WAS MANLY OF YOU TO FIX YOUR MISTAKE!”

“you’re welcome baby.”

“but how’d you manage to get 6 bottles?”

“I had to fight a couple bitches.”

Denki Kaminari

yeah he literally cannot stay mad at you

like at all

and there’s no POSSIBLE way you could even REMOTELY make him angry at you for a long period of time

he’s not petty like bakugou

he’d be mad for like 1 hour and then come back asking for cuddles

what he’s mad over is probably dumb af anyways

okay so you and denki were hanging out in his room

watching reality tv

bc that’s how y’all bond

and during the show the two main girls were arguing over some dumb shit that ppl on reality tv always do

and denki ofc wants to say his little two cents

“no way, she’s totally wrong for that. don’t you think babe?”

“no, I would’ve done the same shit.”

he’s very much betrayed

looks at you like you’re crazy

slowly gets up from the bed

inching closer and closer towards the door

“are you actually upset? you asked for my opinion.”

“yeah but you were supposed to agree with me!”

you roll your eyes bc atp you’re not even taking him seriously

“Y/NNN, im really mad at youuu.”

“yeah ok.”

“FINE THEN! DON’T TALK TO ME!”

“okay.”

he stomps away, his lips curled into a pout

meanwhile you continue to watch your show

he looks back every once in a while to see if you were coming after him

“IM LEAVING FOR REAL NOW!”

“okay.”

“GOING INTO THE ELEVATOR!!”

“yep.”

“NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN!!”

“cool.”

he’s definitely like 10 feet away from your door

you gave him about 30 minutes, deciding that you were sick of reality tv, switching over to a scary movie instead

you see denki’s head peep over the doorframe

“is that the conjuring?”

“yes.”

“mhm I guess I’m not mad at you anymore.”

“what an honor.”

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