bunnyboy-juice · 3 months ago
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me (not joking, very stressed): i think im going to have a mental breakdown if something else goes wrong here.
everyone irl: hahahhahaa ur so funny(:
#i am literally 2 secobds from vomiting over how stressed i am about some worm stuff#*work stuff#but im glad my discomfort is entertaining for them 🙃🙃🙃#(im seriously fine i just have crippling anxiety to the point i speedran the medcard process in my state from how mt assessment went)#(and this would stress Anyone out so yk. i feel like im dying hahahaha)#im also aware mt reaction 8s an over reaction#it just like. kinda sucks that even when im being genuine no one believes me ;~;#no one really believes me unless im like. Actively spiraling in front of them#and then instead of offering support 9/10 ppl get mad and scared and upset that im having a reaction Period#bc they are so large and disproportionate 🤩#anyway. i may actually vomit about this cauze.my stomach wont calm down#and like theres truly solutions there#theres truly things that can be done#im just..so crisised out#between work and personal i have literally not had a SINGLE MONTH this year w/o some major crisis happening around me that im pulled into#i feel so sick#and i have to isolate myself to fix this but dont have the tiiiiiiiiiime available#so yk. doing Great (':#yes this is why ive been extremely online the last few months and Shari everything#i Cannot keep this in and i Cannot talk to people abt it#bc im at a place now where if im asked probing questions theres a 80% chance im gonna wanna explode#and ethically kt doesnt feel ok to go to people Knowing this will happen#im so deeply bot ok rn i am like. woozy#oh no
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hollypies · 2 years ago
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I beg of you please tell me the RW lore I am oh so curious
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Ok so RW lore us super uhm!! Its a lot. So. Uhm
Short!! Version
The basics is that there was a race called the Ancients that really wanted to die permanently! Death in RW is like sleep. You die and wake back up again, over and over. A cycle.
One day they found the Void, a way to die or ascend permanently. So they started jumping in . Then it had some. Some bad affects on certain ppl. So they made giant living calculators called iterators to figure out how to die permanently. They built a lot of them.
Another point is that the Ancients didn't build things like we do. They made purposed organisms, so the iterators are alive beings. Not just robots.
Anyway there was a GREAT ASCENSION and all the Ancients ascended . So. Now there's a bunch of.. Basically teenage gods with discord. Literally. The communications are like discord lol.
One day an iterator named Sliver a Straw sent out a triple affirmative, basically saying that the Great Problem (ascending permanently and safely) had been found, could be reproduced, and was portable. The Sliver judt straight up fucking died.
Iterators don't really die, so Sliver dying was ljke a big yikes moment. Basically illegal. Not Basically actually, it was literally illegal.
Cue shenanigans, and enter Five Pebbles and Looks To The Moon.
Pebbles is really craving that death right about now, and starts making something to kill him. This is extremely taxing, and Iterators take a massive amount of water for their cooling systems. Unfortunately, Pebbles was built right next to his sister Moon, and so he started chugging her water. Thus slowly killing her of dehydration.
Moon uses her big sibling privilege to yell at Pebbles, making him lose control of his experiment and releasing robot cancer into his systems. While this would kill him like he wanted, he instead decides to keep chugging all of Moons water to fight it off.
Cue slugcat campaigns.
Each slugcat can have their own encounters with Moon and Pebbles. By the time the slugcats are around Moon is almost nonfunctional, her entire structure submerged and damaged. Pebbles is slowly being overtaken by the Rot, which is the name for the cancer. You can help Moon as a slugcat, either by bringing her neurons (literally stealing Pebbles brain cells and then bringing it back to Moon, or by a specific campaign.
Eventually Pebbles gives up, and asks a slugcat to bring Moon a power core to help her. And so she's restored to some power and can begin repairing while he dies of the Rot. Weeee!!
Tbh there's a lot of shit I've missed, but I dont wanna spoil like. All of it all of it. It's. Houghghh.
Also as someone with siblings I cant ever imagine almost killing one for my own personal gain. I know Five Pebbles is a fan favorite and that at the time he made the decision to steal Moons water he was in a dark place, but that just doesn't stand by me. He made the ACTIVE decision to steal Moons water, knowing what it would do to her, and kept doing it even after he unleashed the Rot on himself. I get he's sympathetic to a lot of ppl but I just. I just can't understand it.
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seventh-district · 7 months ago
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i’m not like other girls, my “Rest” stats are a heart rate of 110bpm and a HRV of 14 fucking milliseconds. :)
#Seven’s Public Diary#vent#vent post#cw vent#cw vent post#cw health#cw heart#i’m so stressed :) i am soooo fucking stressed and my body is Suffering because of it#i want to just lay here and stare at the ceiling but. maybe a little venting will help#sighhhh wish [N]MbD Sun were here to obsessively fret over me#he can be mean about it idc. at least i’d have someone acknowledging how bad things are for me#sometimes i wonder when the last time was that my body Wasn’t in fight or flight to some degree#have i Ever actually relaxed#hhhhhhh c-ptsd is a bitch#anyways there’s so much to vent about but i’m. doing my best to be vague. i need to be more vague about things#a lot of stuff i can’t vent about anyways. it’s too personal#so instead i’m gonna complain abt how i haven’t been able to play Genshin or Star Rail for nearly a month now#and about how slowly my back is recovering. it’s like every time i re-injure/have a flare up. it heals.. worse. slower and lesser#i dunno how it’s ever gonna get better. truly better. maybe i’ll live with this forever#if being fat is the problem which is definitely partly is. then yeah i’m fucked#all of my problems just make each other worse and i don’t know where the way out of it all is#every time i think i’ve found it i’m wrong and i just make it all worse#anyways as soon as i figure out how to strengthen my core without breaking my back. it’s over for u bitches#‘u bitches’ being uh. all of the shit that needs doing that i cannot physically fucking do right now#i miss being able to sit down. and i’m Regretting de-converting my standing desk back to sitting bc now. i cannot use my PC#which means i can’t fucking do a some of my work or play my silly little gacha games and i’m mad abt it#i’m mad abt a lot more serious things too but again. can’t talk abt it so i’m gonna focus on trivial shit instead#anyways. sorry as always to everyone i haven’t spoken with lately. and in general. i’m so drained from the Everything that i just. can’t.#it shouldn’t be this hard for me to stay in touch w ppl but. it is. guess i’ll add that onto my list of things to be stressed about#i’m so tired of everything man. and i hate being so negative and mean when im stressed & in pain. makes me feel like im becoming my father
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youngestdaughtersyndrome · 2 years ago
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sitting in bed eating cheese absolutely stewing
#so im doing the dishes and heard a knock on the door right. and bc both my parents r downstairs i answer it#and guess fucking what? its the guy i literally switched out of french to avoid because he kept asking me super invasive questions#so im like What the fuck do u want. and he starts this whole pity story about how he was soooo worried when i kept disappearing from school#and how id sometimes come back with bruises and never explained anything to him so he had 'no choice' but to FIND MY ADDRESS and check in#his words btw. this boy told me to my FACE that me having a private life FORCED him to stalk me to my fucking home#and i just saw RED. good thing is that when i get mad i get icy and brutal so i spent five minutes telling this thick skulled idiot that#he has no right to know anything abt me that i didnt tell him and you know what he does????#this audacious motherfucker says Lets not do this on the porch. and then tries to push his way into my fucking house. thats a hard no for me#so i told him exactly what was gonna happen: he was either going to get off my property and stay away from me or i would call the cops#and remove him by force. id like to say that i literally said he had ten seconds to leave or id start throwing punches#and he goes .... Cant we just talk abt this ���??? so i break his nose. and i was within my legal rights to do so bc he was trespassing soooo#yeah anyways i just cannot fucking BELIEVE the entitlement and audacity of some ppl. like its my fucking life i dont have to tell u shit !!!#what the fuck!!! why do they always think im playong hard to get like ffs leave me ALONE#so that was my night 😙✌️ i hope he dies !#l
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minnielvr · 11 months ago
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cold chocolate - kim seungmin
˚ ༘ pairing bf! seungmin x fem! reader
˚ ༘ genre fluff, angst!!, seungmins a bit of a meanie :(
˚ ༘ wc 3.4k
˚ ༘ note never writing smth this long (okay 3k words☠️) again idfk how sum ppl do it😭 sorry if this bad guys i cant write rlly good🦦merry xmas!!!
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"hey y/n can you come out here?" seungmin called to you from your guys' living room.
"yea whats up babe?" you went over to the couch and sat next to him.
"promise you wont be mad?" he looked at you and raised a brow while grabbing your hand.
"oh god seungmin what did you do now?" you chuckled. obviously you thought that whatever he was going to tell you wasn't that shocking and he was just exaggerating, but you were so wrong.
"no y/n this is serious."
"o-oh okay. uhm whats wrong?" you were starting to get nervous now. does he want to break up? did he cheat on you? a million thoughts raced through your head but not one of them was what he was about to tell you.
"i'm not gonna be home for christmas.." he said it so casually as he looked down in his lap.
"oh."
now usually missing holidays wouldn't be such a problem for you two, except christmas. you guys dont really celebrate anything other than valentines, chuseok, and birthdays, sometimes you guys dont even celebrate birthdays. but christmas? it was a must. you were going to go back home to your family with him for the first time. he had even said yes. now all of a sudden he cant? whats more important?
you inhaled a shaky breath and asked, "why?"
"well you know, we have practice to do, and we have to record some things. so i'll be staying at the dorms." he shrugged and let go of your hands. thinking you were fine.
now that pissed you off. practice? recording? he couldn't skip one week of work for christmas? he was never like this, he has never put his work over you.
"seriously seungmin?. you cant just skip a week of work for christmas? you're putting 'some practice' over me?" you looked up at him with an open mouth.
"no y/n, i cannot." he glared at you. why was he giving you attitude all of a sudden? its not like you're the one who will be missing christmas.
"care to explain why?" you crossed your arms.
"dont you get it y/n? my work is harder than yours, you literally do nothing but sit down at a desk all day and book peoples appointments," he slowly started to raise his voice. "you dont get it all. i cant just be home all the time to give you attention. since when were you so clingy?"
you stood up from the couch and backed away from him, scared of him yelling at you. were you really that annoying? your eyes started to water.
"seungmin wh-why are you getting so mad? i'm just asking you to take a week off for christmas, im sure they'll let you. beside you need a break too." you said while looking down, trying to avoid eye contact so he couldn't see your tears.
"i'm mad because you're annoying! i dont want to take a week off. i cant be with you all the time y/n. leave me alone." he turned to the tv and turned it on, acting as if nothing happened.
at this point there were tears running down your face. how could he be so rude and say something like that? sure you guys have had arguments before and said things, but never like this. he the level-headed one in the relationship. he always keeps his cool during arguments because he knows how upset you get.
maybe it is your fault though. maybe you ask for too much attention and let him do all the work in the relationship. maybe you should leave him alone until christmas is over.
"okay. i'm sorry that im too clingy. i'll just leave" you turned around on your foot to go get your backpack with all your things. you'll stay with a friend or something. maybe you were overreacting a bit but you didn't really care, how could your boyfriend just ditch family plans for christmas like that?
"yea whatever, i dont care" and he dismissed your statement just like that.
now that hurts.
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one of your best friends since you were 5, areum, was jeongins girlfriend. you and her were out one day and saw the two of them together, jeongin asked for aerums for her number first and seungmin asked you out a few weeks later. the rest is history.
you just arrived to aerums house and she graciously welcomed you in. seeing the tear stains on your face and your nose red, she figured you had walked here. she was correct. on the way out of your and seungmin's shared apartment, you had forgotten your car keys. but by the time you realized you were already too far down and didn't want to go back up to grab them, especially because seungmin would probably still be in there.
"so? tell me what happened babes" she guided you over to her couch and sat down next to you.
you explained what had happened and she fully agreed with you on your view of the whole thing. i mean, if he already said yes to the plans, why would he switch up all of a sudden? and seungmin would usually take a sick day or soemthing if you asked, he cared about you a lot. you're not saying that he has to prioritize his work over you, but the least he could do was tell you in a nice way or just take a few days off for christmas.
"but wait. that doesn't make sense.." aerum furrowed her eyebrows.
"huh? why?" you looked up at her.
"jeongin said that they have a little christmas break or something like that. i mean, we aren't going anywhere but he said that the boys have no schedules and practices," she looked at you nervously. "do you think that maybe seungmins lying to you?"
well he definitely is, theres no question about that. you just didn't want to believe that he would actually lie to you about something like this.
"n-no he would never..," you looked down in your lap. "oh my god he doesn't want to see my family. he probably thinks i'm rushing into it right? but we were supposed to go to his parents house after that, how is that fair?" you were coming up with all these excuses to not make him look like the bad guy in this situation but there really isnt any. he lied to you and called you cling and annoying. thats the hard truth.
"hey hey calm down its okay," aerum side hugged you and started rubbing your shoulders. "i'm sure it's just a little problem with miscommunication hm? it could be fixed like this." she snapped her finger.
"y-yea of course." you hiccuped. "can i just stay here for the night though? i don't feel like going back yet." you looked up to aerum with wide, teary eyes.
"aw of course honey." she squished your cheeks. "go shower and i'll get some food ready for us. we can watch a movie." she smiled at you and tapped your back to usher you to the bathroom.
you smiled and agreed with her and went to shower. turning the water to borderline boiling so you could release all your thoughts.
you put on some of aerums spare clothes and stepped out of the bathroom and walked to the main room. she had the movie 'home alone' waiting to be played on the tv. she knew it was your favorite christmas movie.
aerum saw you step out and turned her head back over the couch to face you with a big smile on her face, beckoning you to go and sit next to her. you could see a plethora os sugary and salty snacks sitting on the little coffee table in the middle of the room. she really knew how to cheer you up.
you guys ended up watching both home alone movies and ate almost all of the snacks. you guys also fell asleep next to each other on the couch. which was typical for the two of you when you ahd movie nights.
you were the first one to wake up the next morning. rubbing your eyes and aerums foot being the first thing you see was not so pleasant. the sun was shining through the window and you could hear the bustling city of seoul outside. what time was it?
you sat up from the couch while gently taking aerums leg off of your lap. you bent down to grab your phone to see that the time was..2 PM?!?!? seungmin must be worried sick!
you turned to the side and looked at aerum sleeping so peacefully. a little drool coming out the side of her mouth.
"aerum! hey! hey! wake up! it's 2'oclock!" you violently shook her shoulders.
she hummed and swatted your hands away from her body. telling you to shut up.
"as much as i would love to stop doing this i still love you and you have work today. so...get. up." at this point she had opened her eyes and you were staring straight into them.
"oh my god! i have work!" she kicked the blanket off her feet and scrambled to get up off the couch. running to her bathroom to go shower and get ready.
"hey wait! i was gonna go in there!" you chased after her but to no avail. she had already got in and locked the door.
"i know you have boyfriend problems right now but im already late for work! which one is worse y/n?" you could hear her starting to turn on the shower.
"fine, you win." you lightly kicked her bathroom door in anger.
you headed to the kitchen and opened the fridge, looking for ingredients to make breakfast for the two of you. there was nothing inside the fridge except some eggs, bread, butter, and milk. how did aerum and jeongin even survive in this house? at yours and seungmin's apartment, the food inside the fridge and pantry is always stocked. you guys go grocery shopping together too, just to make running errands a little more fun. sometimes he would ride the cart trying to run away from you or sneak in some extra snacks that you guys certainly didn't need to spend so much money on. but thats what made it fun. those little quirks are why you loved seungmin.
as you were reminiscing on those little memories, you heard a door to the apartment open. looking towards it, you saw jeongin walk in. since you started tearing up thinking about yours and seungmins relationship, you quickly wiped them when jeongin came a little closer to you.
"y/n? oh my god! seungmin is so worried about you! you should go to him. like now." he looked genuinely concerned.
"y-yea i should haha," you looked towards the eggs cooking on the stove. "just make sure you keep on eye this food though. me and aerum woke up late so while she showered i figured i could make me and her some food. but i'm leaving now. also you guys should really go grocery shopping." you laughed at him while packing up your things.
he frowned at you and opened the fridge "hey it's not that b-maybe it is..."
aerum walked out of the bathroom wrapped up in a towel and looked at you wide eyed. she heard you talking to yourself so she decided to come out.
"damn babe" jeongin turned towards aerum and looked at her while raising his eyebrows.
"jeongin! what are you doing here! you weren't gonna be back until like...2...oh." she looked at the clock and now realized it was 3. "oh my god i'm gonna get fired!!"
"chill out aerum, i'm sure one day won't do anything" you chuckled at her over exaggeration.
"okay y/n listen," she went up to you and put her hands on your shoulders, staring you dead in the eyes. "you back in your apartment and be very clear to seungmin that you're sad and man and whatnot. be confident and don't cry." she pursed her lip at you.
"okay! got it. now go finish getting ready so you can leave before jeongin makes you stay!" you winked at her and left her apartment.
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you were in front of your apartment door, giving yourself a pep talk about why you shouldn't be scared to go in there and confront seungmin. communication is key right?
you opened the door and were met with an empty house, no sign of seungmin anywhere. maybe he was sleeping? they didn't have any schedules today if you recalled correctly.
you walked towards your guys' shared bedroom and opened the door to be met with a sad sight. it was seungmin, curled up in the bed, holding onto your pillow. he seemed to be asleep and you didn't want to wake up him up. you were still mad at him, but the sight made your heart clench.
you went to your dresser and set your bag down. then you went to the bathroom to do your skincare routine since you hadn't gotten the chance to do so at aerums place. seems as though that woke seungmin up because next thing you know he's walking up to bathroom door that you forgot to close. you saw him behind you in the mirror.
"y/n?" he came closer to you and wrapped his arms around you. "i-i thought something happened to you when you left, i got really worried y'know..."
"well, i'm fine see? no need to worry." you unwrapped his arms from around your waist and stepped away from him. you appreciated the gesture but he's acting so normal, as if nothing happened between you two.
"oh...okay." he got the memo that you wanted to be left alone, so he left the bathroom. this time closing the door.
you were conflicted. you were mad at seungmin and he really hurt you. plus, the holidays were coming up and you didn't want to be in a sour mood for it. but at the same time, you could see he felt bad. him just initiating physical contact and being the first one to talk said a lot.
you see, both you and seungmin were both very prideful people. that means that when the two of you argued, instead of being normal and talking it out a few hours later. you guys stretched it on for 1-2 days before either of you came to apologize. communication was something your and seungmin's relationship was heavily lacking.
you decided that you would wait for seungmin to speak to you. and if he doesn't then well, you'll cross that bridge when you get there.
once you finished up in the bathroom, you made your way out to your bedroom and saw that seungmin was curled up on the bed with his phone.
"thought you had practice seungmin?" you crossed your arms and raised your brow.
"o-oh well you know i decided to skip today because i was so worried about you and i was waiting for you to come home." he made up an excuse.
"well im fine so, you should probably get going now." you patted his back and shooed him away.
you guessed that was his breaking point because then he turned around to face you with tears in his eyes and said
"y/n please...i'm sorry. i lied okay? i don't have any schedules or practice for the next whole week." he looked down in shame.
you already knew that so it wasn't that much of a shocker. but it really hurt coming from him.
"why would you lie to me seungmin?" tears were now starting to well up in your eyes. "i'm sorry if i rushed you into meeting my parents. it's just that we've been together for 2 years and you never got to see them except on calls so i thought it would be a nice trip for us...." you wiped your tears.
"no love trust me thats not the reason at all." he sat down next to you in the bed and took your face in his hands.
"so then why did you lie to me and call me clingy and annoying?" he winced when you mentioned what he called you. he really didn't mean to. he doesn't think that about you at all. it came out of nowhere.
"because y/n....i was scared to meet them. i thought that maybe they would think i wasn't good enough for you." he looked down in his lap.
"seungmin why on earth would you think that? my parents already love you and they've seen you on call. they practically adore you." you took his face in your hands now. "seungmin no one would ever think that about you. you're perfect in so many ways and you deserve me just as much as i deserve you, if not more."
"y/n how can you say that when i said all those things?" he was referring to when he called you clingy and annoying.
"because i know you didn't mean it baby. it did hurt a lot, but it's nothing you can't make up for." you smiled at him. "i know you've been a little stressed with all the end of year activities and stuff. but you're getting a break now! enjoy it."
"i just feel so guilty for lying to you and saying those things y/n, i truly am sorry. how can i make it up to you?" he looked at you wide eyed.
"cuddles and kisses. but we can do that after we pack since we're leaving in 2 days." you giggled.
seungmin pulled you by your waist into a hug and kissed the top of your head. "you know i love you a lot y/n, right?"
"yes i know that baby, i love you too" you smiled up at him. "now! lets get to packing!" you got up from the bed and started pulling clothes out of your drawers. seungmin groaned, not wanting to get up from the bed.
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it was christmas eve and you and seungmin were at your parents house. they were thrilled to see him and loved him very much. not failing to make him feel very deserved.
you guys were all sitting in the living room and it was 11:30 pm. your parents decided they would go to sleep and give you two some alone time. you guy's both said goodnight and waited for them to leave until you started talking.
"so, having a good time so far?" you turned sideways to face seungmin.
"of course, the best time even." he smiled at you. "wanna watch home alone? i know it's your favorite and we didn't get to watch it back at home."
"yes! i'll go make some hot chocolate for us." you hopped off the couch and made your way to the kitchen to boil some milk.
it's been about five minutes and the milk was still boiling. seungmin came into the kitchen to keep you some company. he walked over to where you were by the stove and wrapped his arms around your waist from behind.
"could this thing be any slower?" he whispered right into your ear.
"ugh, i know right. i don't even care anymore," you turned off the stove. "we can have cold chocolate i guess." you started pouring the milk into yours and seungmins cups.
"anything is good when i'm with you." he kissed the side of your neck and swayed you side to side.
you giggled and turned around towards him and said "awww look at you being all flirty" you teased.
he shrugged his shoulders. "it's the christmas spirit i guess."
you then looked at the digital clock behind seungmin and it read 11:59.
"oh seungmin look!" you point behind him at the clock. "it's almost christmas! in five....four....three....t-"
he pulled your face towards him and brought you in for a kiss. he rested his hands on your hips and then pulled away. you looked up at him with wide eyes.
"man, i wish it was christmas everyday if you're gonna act like this"
he chuckled. "merry christmas y/n." he pulled you into his chest and rested his chin on your head.
"merry christmas seungmin."
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kindlespark · 8 months ago
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this is gonna be SO long and rambly sorry anyway i saw a post abt how babel does queer characters and it got me thinking abt why the tropes it uses would usually turn me off other stories but didn’t here
MAJOR BABEL SPOILERS //
i feel like i’d be more mad abt how robinramy ended up in babel if it marketed itself as queer lit at all or if its fans were going “WOW AMAZING QUEER REP” abt it. but no one told me any of that, so finding out they were gay was just a fun little bonus surprise to me. i get why ppl are eh abt robinramy not getting together/technically still being subtext (which i dont think is really true btw like the book literally says “robin was falling in love” but idk i guess if you were stupid you might’ve assumed that it was falling in love with oxford given how romantic some of the other language is (WHICH IS ALSO THE POINT bc i think robin’s friendship with ramy blurring into romance is why he romanticised like all his friendships/experiences in oxford BUT IM GETTING OFF-TOPIC)). i just think robin’s repression abt being gay was intrinsically tied to his attitudes on imperialism (wrt refusing to acknowledge anything that complicated his life until it was too late) and i don’t consider it a cop out or queerbait. like i genuinely don’t think robinramy could ever have gotten together without drastic alterations being made in terms of plot and character. plus i think it’s clear that kuang didn’t want to write a story with any kind of focus on romance at all, because it’s not that kind of book. there’s no successful het romance either, so it grates a lot less. the only reason romance is included at all is to show the ways in which white entitlement manifests. so the tragic way robinramy played out just made sense to me.
and i speak as someone who accidentally spoiled myself on You Know What in the middle of reading and i was like ugghh boooo dreading it the whole time expecting to roll my eyes when it happened but then when it did i was like. wow im actually not that mad LMFAO 😭😭😭 actually thematically the book sets it up so well that i believed that this was unfortunately the only way it could’ve gone. babel is about the loss and tragedy and grief that colonised people experience. it’s about the lengths people will go to to uphold empire and the lengths ppl will go to to tear it down like idk 😭 i guess it is bury your gays but it didnt bother me this time because i thought it fit thematically ❤️ i enjoy tragedy as a genre a lot and i would’ve made it gay anyway you know. thanks rf kuang for doing it for me so i didnt have to.
WHICH IS ALL TO SAY that i guess if you’re going into babel for the queer rep without appreciating that the story is fundamentally a tragedy it would feel like it’s just reusing tired tropes….. but i think the choices kuang made were rly deliberate and not in a way that feels like trauma porn or shock value. the book is fundamentally about the struggles of poc so the layer of queerness that was introduced felt like a subtle extension of the experiences of characters of colour in the book, and i enjoyed and related to it as a queer chinese person who kind of realised they had to prioritise their fight for the liberation of poc over queerness mainly because the idea of western queer liberation cannot be dissociated from imperialism and many aspects of homophobia as we know it was an export of christian european empire into our colonised countries in the first place and FUCK THIS IS A WHOLE OTHER TANGENT ABOUT HOW I THINK RAMY AS A CHARACTER IS EMBLEMATIC OF THE TENSION AND STRUGGLE THAT QUEER POC DIASPORA HAVE BETWEEN OUR IDENTITIES GODDAMNIT OK FORGET IT POST CANCELLED i just rly think babel’s handling of queer characters is fine and makes sense and i like it personally and maybe i will make a coherent analysis about it one day but that day is not today byeeeeeee
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stgosupremacy · 3 months ago
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Hi! I just wanna say I love ur blog! I like how you see and talk abt Goh's character ❤️
I know some people (mostly those toxic pokemon fans) REALLY don't like Goh, and it upsets me bc it feels like me and them watched a completely different character on screen.
What do you think about it? I just don't get how they can hate him!
omg hey fellow goh lover!!!!!! 🥰 i also just wanna say thank you for the lovelyyyy message because i ask the same question daily honestly
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(sorry i had to use that the animation is too slick)
ANYWAY
it actually upsets me a lot too that people don't see the good in Goh! im glad you think the same <3
okay there's some instances (yes im saying this 💀) where even i think goh went a bit too far like even though i think it's sick he caught suicune i do get why people were so mad about it? but cmon that was a bit too much hate 😭
Ash hadn't caught any legendaries his entire journey so yeah Goh catching suicune at the early-ish start of his journey was....just a bit like oh ok wow even for me lmao but yk that topic will probably never calm down lets be honest
Then there's him just catching every pokemon without battling, that I also get why ppl are mad because I was rewatching the unova anime a few days ago and a lot of the episodes had an emphasis onbattling before catching, and you can say that goes for the rest of the pokemon anime after that too...up until journeys 😂
Goh is a bit of a rulebreaker in that instance, i get that, but if people hate him taking so much screentime for Ash
(heads up the episode where goh goes on vacation and meets tokio again is the 1st episode in the anime history without any scene of Ash in it at ALL which is pretty crazy)
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then I'm sure we wouldn't want to see Goh battle e v e r y single pokemon he catches, like his goal is literally to catchem all as well BUT BUT THEN AGAIN, that arguement is pretty weak i guess, and i understand why people would be mad, but I really dont like when they genuinely just hate him excessively 😭😭
OKAY POSITIVES NOW THIS IS WHAT I THINK
His character development was really nice in my opinion, and I really like how he more often emphasised the fact the reason why he wanted to catch throughout the series, and he reeaaaally understood pokemon better and forged such nice relationships with all of them
(also i was a bit sad Ash didnt get any galar starters too but....im sorry i feel like they're too perfect with Goh im proud of him)
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🥺💖
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he's really adorable goofy sweet amazing incredible gay and literally the entire package there are those minute things about the pokemon catching yadayada but that basically is forgotten when i watch him on screen
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gonna reinforce my point about how he is perfect with the Galar starters...im sorry but look at them.
(you cannot talk to me about the drizzle episodes I will literally start crying. Also the grookey errand episode and that hug. Omfg)
You can see how much he cares for his pokemon (all the hugs above omg stop 😔💖) and I wish other people would also see that 😭 😭
He's so sweet and kind now especially at the end when Ash finally managed to help open his heart to other people and also Ash himself 😛 😛 OK I told myself I wouldn't bring satogou into Goh's honour post but they're another reason I love Goh so much, they compliment each other so well and I couldn't think of anyone else more perfect for Ash I love them both 💗🥺 (... In case you hadn't noticed)
Then again, it's still opinion based ig, not gonna fight about it 💀
Sorry this was such a long response (but cmon what were yall expecting..) but I kind of felt like I was gonna do a post like this sometime soon so thank you for anyone who voluntarily read this long-ass rant about Goh and @louie-inc for asking the question too!! 💕 💯 💕 💯
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polyamorousmood · 5 months ago
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hi! i'd love to get some sympathy/advice/etc from other ppl about this. so long story short my girlfriend (wonderful amazing great i am so happy with her) has a boyfriend, and i at first their rs was meant to be ephemeral, but then things changed and they realized they could make a longform commitment work out, so they tried! problem is, during the trial run, the guy realized poly wasnt working for him and he failed to communicate this well, so it caused a situation where he was very much just fishing for my partner to get in a closed rs with him. when she expressed how hurtful and wrong that was, he apologized and changed his behavior and after some more various ups and downs we've now settled into a pretty good situation where he's giving polyamory a serious try and seems sincerely committed to making it good! i trust my gf wholeheartedly and i want nothing but the best for them both, and for that brief period of time where it was ok we even had 3person dates and really special interactions, so i came to sincerely like guy a decent bit and i am cautiously but sincerely optimistic. however, by having to admit shit to himself, he's now of the mind that he'd like a much more segmented-off rs with my partner, which is fine, but also the resentment he felt towards not being able to have my gf all to himself made him lose his positive feelings towards me and now he expresses a (his words) 'goodwilled indifference' and we havent even Talked since he tried to effectively ultimatum my gf out of being poly. and that is just SO hurtful when i know i did absolutely nothing wrong to warrant the loss of what i felt was a genuinely precious and positive connection, and like, the first time ive had the chance to have a metamour! like as someone who really cares about learning how to admit fault i really cannot stress enough how much i didnt do jack shit here i was just vibing and trying to be nice and now it's just this sad thing i have to deal with. i know it has everything to do with his own preferences and insecurities and nothing to do with me, but i still feel a big child-like sense of betrayal and injustice and it makes me want to be mean and bitter and defensive ("well if you dont give a shit about me and wanna pretend i don't exist, then im gonna do the same! how do you like that, huh?" type beat). i know those feelings are to be worked with and worked through instead of acted upon, but it's still hard :-( i dont really miss *him*, really, i just miss not being in a polycule that has a member who struggles so much with polyamory. and though i trust her deeply, i am still sad and worried that this is a precarious situation that can end up hurting my partner and hampering her ability to feel free and happy in polyamory, which only adds to my mistrusting of the guy. anyone else in a similar situation, havin' to work with a poly-newbie metamour or something similar? im not crazy for getting bad vibes, despite my best hopes for them? thank you either way, i dont know enough poly people irl and ive been bursting with this shit for a bit so it helps even to just ramble it out
Yeah, I've been in similar places. Just putting the read more immediately because I don't have a good pithy introduction. But uh, TL;DRI guess? 🤷‍♀️: its totally fair for you to struggle with some negative feelings. But you are still in it together (even if he's pretending you don't exist) and the only way to the other side is through.
Its shitty, its exhausting, its infuriating. And it's all the more frustrating that you like... don't even WANT to be mad at him cause he DID apologize and now he IS trying to change the shitty parts, so you WANT to encourage that. Feels very
And it puts your mutual partner in the tough spot of having to balance⚖️ things between you two if he's unwilling to talk to you. And like, you're stuck waiting for him to come around, you can't even really DO anything, its all on HIM to prove he's not going to be an asshole forever.
And you kinda resent him for causing this much trouble basically all on his own! And then thinking he can still get all the good shit after stirring the pot! Like he tried to break you up and now you have to be the bigger person?? What kinda bullshit--
Fucking. Sucks.
I do have some advice, though as with most things, its not magic 🪄
🤬Be mad for a little bit! Allow yourself to feel it. You're not gonna wallow 🐖there, but let it hit you full force how much you dislike being in this bullshit situation. Maybe have a cry about it or throw some darts at his picture 🎯. Then, and only then,
Set it aside. Set the anger aside in your mind, set the situation aside in your discussions. Say "yup, sucks. Moving on..." and enjoy the good parts of your life.
As part of that, remember polyamory is a big ask for people who've never done it before. Him even just politely ignoring you is likely, in his mind, him compromising on everything he's believed in for years and the fundamentals of what his life will look like. That's a big deal. It's hard to do after there was previously a higher standard set, but try to give him some credit for that anyway. (Again. You are probably going to have to Be Mad first to be able to do this. That's okay. Don't skip ahead.)
I don't think having approximately the same attitude back is necessarily a bad strategy. Maybe don't do it with the petulance you presented in the ask 😝 but if you're able to just gently, non-judgmentally accept neutrality as a mode of operating with him... might save you a lot of trouble honestly🤷. Warmth is great and all, but I think it runs the risk of you burning out and feeling greater resentment down the line if it stays one sided (but you know yourself better than I do, so if you can handle it, power to you).
Know your feelings about this really well. Know what you're good with 👍, know what bothers you but you're willing to do for the good of the polycule😖, and know what really upsets you👎. Is this something you can make work long term? What changes would you need to have it work long term (including progress from him, accommodations from your partner, etc)?
Consider confronting him directly. You'll know better if that's actually a good idea in this situation than I will, but consider it. It may help you move past things to air your feelings, it may help him understand you better and vice versa, and it may lay the groundwork for a more functional relationship down the line. I must admit bias here. It is VERY important to me that things can be relaxed with my metas. The idea of refusing to engage with me feels like they're refusing to engage with the very concept of polyamory, and I that cannot work in my life - like, I run a poly blog you can guess how I value polyamory 😂 If you can be comfortable with something closer to parallel polyamory, this may be unnecessary.
And of course, through all of this, you have to talk to your partner. All of it. If you have a tendency to martyr yourself so as not to stress your partner out, overpower that tendency for this one. You are NOT doing your partner any favors by doing bottling it up. 🍾
For example, earlier I said your partner is going to have to balance things between you and your meta. It may be tempting to think you can spare her some of that by shrinking your feelings and needs, so maybe you'll just bite your tongue. However, she has to do the work anyway, and forcing her to work with incomplete information actually makes the balancing that much harder. While you shouldn't harp on them about it, she should know where you're at in all this. You owe your partner the ability to make informed decisions, and your happiness and ability to sustain a certain set-up is going to be an important factor to them! Tell them your misgivings, tell them if its going to take you some time to forgive him his bullshit, tell them if you are okay with something in the short term but don't know if you can spring it long term, tell them if you need a break from thinking about the whole damn situation. (And of course, as always, tell your partner when something feels good or is going well 😊)
It can be recovered. It will require patience. Hang in there. 🤗 I admire your commitment to figuring it out, and it sounds like you have a splendid partner who is just as committed to making it workable. I'm rooting for you all 💙💖🖤
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aeirithgainsborough · 2 years ago
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i just finished playing parts 1 and 2 of tlou for the first time and, as someone who has grown to love joel and ellie very much within the span of 72 hours and found their characterization in pt 2 to be straight up bizarre, your takes on the game are a godsend. the rage in my heart cannot be extinguished but it can be soothed. thank u for ur service 🫡
you’re welcome!! it’s baffling to me how many people seem to have mindlessly taken it all in, just letting themselves be force fed some bullshit morality tale with no thought cus… yeah it’s bad ajsjjs. the gameplay is good although a little repetitive since it’s more open, the graphics are stunning, and as a disabled person who can struggle with games sometimes the accessibility is next level. they definitely get credit for that!
but the narrative is terrible. for a start it’s chock full of contrivances. abby happens to find tommy and then when she’s looking for him after making a FOURTEEN DAY JOURNEY across a dangerous world she gets into trouble and who should save her but joel! who then runs into a lodge unarmed with a group of strangers after 20 years of being on his guard. and then ellie runs into the room too unarmed despite the noises she can hear coming from it, even though she took on david and his cronies at 14 and got the better of them lol? then they all travel another FOURTEEN DAYS no problems, they find who they need in a huge city, ellie leaves a handy map for abby to find her. it’s absurd. one or two contrivances i can ignore but when you’re that reliant on them for your plot it’s not good writing!
then there’s ellie ‘im scared to end up alone’ ‘you’re the only person to never leave me and id be more scared without you’ williams. a girl who lost her best friend/first love traumatically and had a whole ‘let’s make the most of the time we have left’ thing with her… and she doesn’t speak to the most important person in her life for 2 years?? not my ellie lmao. i can see her being mad. i can see her being cold to him. I can see that relationship being different bcus of joel’s lie. i can’t see her going cold turkey whilst living on the same property as him for that long. i can’t see her never asking him for a proper explanation in that time. she leaves everything behind eventually despite her fears and how important the notion of family is to her. bye dina and jj. and then at the end… it’s pointless! she didn’t even get her revenge after becoming unrecognisable, leaving her loved ones behind, and killing a slew of people to get there. nor does she develop lol AT ALL. at 14 she had survivors’s guilt and was ready to sacrifice her life bcus of that and a belief her life doesn’t matter and then at 19 she’s the same! there’s no lightbulb moment where she’s like OH my life does matter it does have value none of my friends’ deaths were my fault and i don’t need to die for absolution. there’s no moment she realises why joel saved her. she’s stagnant. it’s so miserable. and it haunts me what we could have had if joel hadn’t been killed off for torture porn shock value. if they’d had to go on some journey with their relationship cold and not As It Was and along the way ellie has that understanding that her life DOES matter. ‘no one wants the same story they played in tlou blah blah boring’ LOL YES?? ellie and joel are why ppl loved part 1 and that’s why they had to lie so much in the lead up to the game and marketing. ‘this is a story about joel and ellie that’s why we decided not to have it about new characters’ lie ‘we love joel and ellie and we’re going to treat them with respect’ lie, plus aging joel and ellie up in the trailers and inserting joel into the trailer in a way that made ppl think they were going on a journey. it was a deliberate lie to make ppl who wanted more joel and ellie buy the game and they told it for a reason. and besides there’s a difference between ‘i just met you and i don’t like you rn but slowly im gonna love you’ and ‘i love you but i don’t much like you’ and that difference is actually fascinating and could have been used to rlly good effect instead of… all those stupid contrivances and torture porn!
and then there’s joel lmao. even the opening when he says ‘i saved her’ is so funny his expression his tone it’s literally disney/marvel villain sjsjsjd i cannot take it seriously. beyond that there’s such a dissonance between a) what actually happens in part 1 and what they say in part 2 and b) the violent world they’ve put him/us in and then asked us to get across in one piece with a kid in part 1 and how he’s then judged for that in part 2. ‘get this kid across the country but when WE make it so you’re attacked in every chapter and have to defend yourself/ellie we are going to say joel is a cruelly violent man’ ‘get this kid across the county without letting her die when you’re attacked pls and btw in part 2 we are going to say you taught her violence and corrupted her’ never mind that it’s impossible joel could have done the job in the world THEY created and then punished us for acting accordingly in, but also that he doesn’t even give her a gun until using one makes her sick and it’s not a fun toy to her. and even then it’s for emergencies. he never attacks first, he only defends. and they made it that way! that specific world is useless in moralising to us about violence bcus of that dissonance. none? of? us? can? help? it? ‘be violent when ur attacked or you’ll die and can’t progress the story but we are gonna punish and villainise and demonise you for it in part 2’ ‘kill hundreds of people and dogs, torture people, but did you know violence is bad actually??’. ABSURD. and in that hospital joel was NOT the aggressor. honestly the whole thing would have worked better if abby’s revenge had been for pointless violence. but from the point we know him joel is never violent until they are attacked first. that’s inarguable fact. even tommy in part 2 tells ellie joel wouldn’t have gone to seattle for revenge if it had been one of them! it’s been a long time since he did terrible things and im not saying that makes it ok (except he’s hot and not real so idc) BUT that aside the point is, he doesn’t go looking for it, and it’s never pointless anymore. but he’s the Big Bad Evil who deserves to die like a dog and we know you all love joel but we’re gonna make you hear it and watch it and also in the whole game we are gonna make him the punching bag we are not even going to ONCE let him open his mouth and explain what really happened in that hospital and why he saved ellie (yeah he’s so terrible for not letting a suicidal 14yr old kill herself)! which rlly brings us back round to the dissonance cus they’ve ALL done shitty stuff to survive including abby but she’s gonna be the one to ‘stop horrible evil villain joel in his tracks’ when he’s been living quietly in jackson for 5 years and she’s gonna get her revenge and then after get a happy hopeful ending all to show us violence and revenge is bad which a) falls flat bcus what? revenge makes you lose everything and end up alone except not for abby! and b) she’s objectively just as awful if not more so than joel but she’s the one who has to stop him and gets a nice redemption arc with a hopeful happy ending and joel has to die! abby:
shows great pleasure in slowly torturing joel and then killing him brutally
does the above in front of his screaming kid who’s being held down and forced to watch even though just finding her dad’s body is traumatising for her
is in an authoritarian militia who is intent on wiping out anyone else out in seattle lol?
kills people for that militia including kids
after torturing joel and killing him is so deeply unaffected by it she laments the fact she hasn’t got time to torture some seraphites who are chained up in cells
kills jessie when he’s unarmed cus she rlly learnt violence and revenge was so awful and took everything from you. wait, no, only ellie had to learn that lesson and end up alone. she also shoots and injured tommy!
once again shows sadistic pleasure in the idea of killing when she’s about to slit dina’s throat. this pleasure is bcus she’s pregnant so again yeah she rlly was so affected by her violence and revenge lmao.
never shows any great remorse beyond a throwaway line, meanwhile ellie loses absolutely everything including her fingers and joel, peacefully minding his business in jackson is the villain who deserves to brutally die and even after he’s dead he’s further villanised by the narrative lol even tho he was right to kill jerry fuck that man!
it’s just completely nonsensical! not only are they moralising to us in a world that doesn’t suit it, but they can’t even do it well!
it’s also just relentless misery and torture porn. kill all these ppl kill these dogs watch joel die horribly beat ellie up as the person who killed him even though you love her and are attached to her (really struggle to understand where im meant to find empathy for abby during this, esp after jessie and then the whole dina bit) watch ellie lose her family lose her fingers and end up alone which was her greatest fear. don’t even get me started on the section that posits ellie as a david figure down to gameplay mechanics and the theatre set up which is beyond vile when he tormented her when she was a fucking kid and the voice actor has talked about how he was going to r*** her. it’s vile enough that they took the first lesbian protagonist of an AAA game and tortured her for 25 hours straight and turned her into the villain but to also position her as her own fucking predator is straight up horrific. cus that’s not a stereotype in the lgbt community… as an aside, troy saying joel is the same as david is the stupidest thing ive ever heard and he should shut up forever.
on top of all that the game is homophobic, transphobic and racist. neil got the idea when he fantasised about killing palestinians in revenge… yikes. you can even see how the conflict between the wlf and the seraphites mirrors what’s going on in palestine. it’s actually a plot that’s very similar to an early iteration of tlou1 that was stopped cus... it didn’t make sense for anyone in that world to travel when it’s so dangerous just to get revenge ajsjsjs come back bruce! (ppl like to forget he was integral to part 1)
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this game doesn’t respect the characters, it doesn’t respect the world, and it sure as heck doesn’t respect us. it takes the ambiguity from the end of part 1 which made it SO great and rips it to shreds. instead of being allowed to make our own minds up they ram down our throats that joel was completely wrong in the way they punish him through the narrative and ellie (the ellie part just makes it worse :/). goodbye nuance goodbye grey area. the reaction to it from gamers who hail it as a narrative masterpiece and love abby whilst arguing joel is a villain who deserved to die show what propaganda was invented for actually! and then ppl have the audacity to say if you don’t like the game you’re a homophobic woman hater with no depth or nuance ITS LAUGHABLE.
i found the experience of playing the game so genuinely traumatic it was that full of torture porn but the good news is the further out i get from playing the game the better it gets. i haven’t cried for days and days about it which is a record!! and at that point it gets so much easier to disengage from part 2 and just enjoy the actual masterpiece part 1 was.
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doyouevenshipbr0 · 8 months ago
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another live action ATLA rant. who’s shocked.
so im seeing a lot of ppl saying things defending the show, and whatever, fine. i agree with some. this show is NOT all bad. not even close.
the one defense i CANNOT get behind is “the people that dont like it are mad they made changes and mad its not a complete copy of the original”. do not get me wrong, i am completely aware that i (and many others) had a bias coming into this. everyone loves the original show. so many of us are very protective and dont want to see changes, bc why change something that was perfect to begin with.
however, no fucking shit they were gonna make changes. duh. wtf would be the point of this if they werent gonna change ANYTHING.
just bc i/other people don’t like some of the changes, that doesn’t mean we dont have valid critiques and were just mad at the idea of any types of changes.
i, and many other people, really enjoyed some of the changes. everyone loves the kiyoshi addition. ive seen people praising the zuko saving his crew plot line (and i completely agree). from what ive seen, most people like that azula is in the show already (ive seen people hating on her actress tho which is 1 nuts bc she did an awesome job and 2 stemming from misogyny/pedophilia but thats besides the point). everyone loves the scene w lu ten’s funeral (personally i dont care for this one bc i think the show was showing iroh’s cards way too early. they clearly know hes a fan fav and they wanted to show the best of him from the very start. which i dont think is fair to his character.)
but anyways, point is, there were a handful of things this adaptation changed that people really like!!! me included!!!!!!!!
so when i see stuff like “people are being pessimistic and miserable and hating on the fact that its not exactly the same” (paraphrasing) i get so frustrated bc that is SO not true. im not just looking to hate something.
ur telling me, if u didnt watch the show beforehand, u wouldn’t have thought that omashu episode was a fucking mess? like genuinely. try ur hardest to think about this show as a standalone piece of work, like u suggest all the haters should do, and think about that episode. u would be so confused by the whirlwind of seemingly pointless character/plot dumping. like teo and his dad, jet and the freedom fighters, bumi, and the cave of two lovers stuff? why in gods name would alllllll of that be going on at one time? like that is just one example of the changes being messy. but when u have prior knowledge of the show, ur like “oh! thats jet! yeah i know him.” but in the context of the new show he is so removed from everything other than katara and has like 6 mins of screen time, and his presence feels so forced and near pointless (ok yeah he helped katara w her bending for like a sec).
yes i am a hater, but im not gonna hate the show (which i rly dont hate the show anyways) just for the fact that there is change!
but yes i am gonna hate when they changed something and the change is worse, or illogical, or messy, or pointless. which a LOT of these changes were.
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rachelcommitscrimes · 2 years ago
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im gonna rant abt how much i hate the ghost eyes fandom (as a former fan) bc im just kinda mad rn
so uhh yeah major TW for s3lf h4rm, romanticizing mental illness, su1c1de, sadomasochism, infantilization, and rlly just anything related to that
(also sorry if this looks weird idk how to separate stuff on tumblr)
also DO NOT harass the creator or anyone mentioned here, you’re no better than them if you do that
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ok so i read ghost eyes like 2 years ago but i stopped reading about the point where they were on that field trip. i still think it’s a nice comic and i’m sure the author is a cool person, also the art style is awesome. but the fandom is so fucking gross that i’m surprised more people haven’t talked about it. 
for some backstory on this, i used have REALLY bad depression and was cutting myself regularly (i’m much better now, i have medication, therapy, and i’m almost a year clean) i also stopped reading due to the comic severely damaging my mental health and i’m very glad i did. i was younger and immature and thought i could handle such content. this led to me becoming extremely obsessed with the comic to an unhealthy level, and getting severely attached to one of the characters (rudy) because i could relate to him at that time. i seriously thought that i WAS him sometimes.
i understand now that i should NOT have ignored the label and what i did was definitely wrong and if the creator is reading this i deeply apologize. i’m in a much better place now and i’m just glad that i was able to get the help i needed.
ok now to the angry part
if you don’t know what ghost eyes is, it’s a webcomic about a severely traumatized boy attending school for the first time and meeting a bunch of other severely traumatized kids. this comic has a crap ton of triggering/sensitive/disturbing topics (which is not a bad thing as long as you do it right) and like i said before, the creator has kindly put a warning before the comic starts stating that you SHOULD NOT romanticize/idolize/sexualize/kin any of the characters, do not read unless you can handle such topics, and so forth. now i know i should have definitely put the comic down before and not gotten obsessed over it, but i knew damn well enough that it was messed up to romanticize/sexualize any of the characters/things that happened in the book.
there are several scenes in which a character is self harming or harming someone else, and the comments will say shit like “nooo my poor bean” “awww baby don’t do that” or my personal favorite “protect the smol bean.” first of all, the characters are like 16-17, second of all, i cannot even tell you how fucked up it is that people see someone ruining their lives and putting themselves in danger and think it’s “cute” or “anxiety smol bean uwu” THERES LITERALLY A SCENE WHERE SOMEONE IS GETTING STABBED AND PPL ARE DRAWING THIS MF IN A MAID DRESS.
another reason i despise these fans is that they see an abusive relationship and start making ships/kinning them. as someone who has gone through pretty much everything rudy has gone through, i cant tell you how irritating it is to see people shipping him with his abuser or calling him a “cutie patootie masochist boi uwu” cause lemme tell you what-it doesnt feel good to have to put your health in danger and ruin your relationships with others just so you can get off somehow. ITS NOT FUN. the whole point of rudy’s character is to not romanticize someones fucked up mental health.
i could spend hours talking about this group of immature brats, but i’m tired and it’s a school night and i have a test tomorrow. i might add on if i feel like i need to but overall i really hope those immature fans grow up and realize their mistakes like i did, or get the help they need.
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pastelpousay · 3 months ago
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I’m so sick of everyone (kinda rant/vent to be deleted)
BRO ISTG THIS WEEK EVERYTIME SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS SOMETHING GOOD HAPPENS THEN IT GOED RIGHT BACK TO BAD. LIKE LITERALLY EARLIER I THOUGHT I FUCKED UP N SHIT AND THEN AFTER I GET AN AMAZING SUPRISE!! 💗 AFTER THAT THERE COMES THE ANON AND THEN I GET SOME SUPER SWEET MESSAGES FROM PPL BUT LIKE
I DOTM EVEN WANNA SAY WHAT THIS IS ABOUT LIKE I WAS JUST TRYING TO BE NICE AND THINK OF MY FRIEND LIKE AND BE KIND ONLY TO BE CALLED SELFISH LIKE WHAT. IDEK THIS PERSON IRL IDK WHY I GIVE A DAMN THEY DONT WVEN CARE ABOUT ME THEY ONLY WANNA TALK TO ME ABOUT THEIR SHIT LIKE DUDE I DONT CARE ABOUT YOUU, FUCK YOU. HOW ARE YOU GONNA TREAT ME LIKE SOME TOXIC FRIEND MEANWHILE ITS NOT EVEN THAT DEEP. IM NOT GONNA FIGHT OVER PIXELS I WAS LITERALLY JUST GOING TO HIDE IT IVE ALREADY BEEN LYING ALL THIS TIME WHAT DOES IT MATTER 💀😭
“You should probably try and let go again” FUCK OFF FUCK OFF FUCK OFF IM NOT DOING WHAT YOU SAY IM NOT A FUCKIN SUCK UP I DONT KNOW I FEEL LIKE THERES SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME BUT LIKE WHAT LIKE WHY DO PEOPLE HATE ME, WHY ARE YOU MAD I LIKE A CHARACTER WHATS?? WRONG WITH MY ART?? SOMETHINGS WRONG WITH ME BECAUSE I LIKE THE SAME CHARACTER AS YOU!! UR SUCH A PICKY BITCH I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY I BOTHERED WITH YOU I WAS PUTTING OFF EVEN INTERACTING WITH YOU CIZ I ALREADY KNEW IT WASNT GONNA GO GOOD THATS WHY I DIDNT WANT TO I SHOULDVE LEFT YOU ALONE BUT IM TO NICE APPARENTLY WHY AM I THE BAD GUY HERE WHY AM I THE BETRAYER (I get it from my man 💙)
I don’t get it I don’t get it it wasn’t even that deep why do I have to do something every time something might go south. ME it’s always me having to do something and never anyone else
Tomorrow I will stop interacting with that mf tomorrow I’m going to block you. DUD IM NOT A STEPPING STONE IM A REAL PERSON WITH FEELINGS I EVEN IF I AM ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE SCREEN. STOP TREATING ME LIKE IM A SUCK UP IM NOT A SUCK UP AND ESPECIALLY NOT FOR YOU. IF I DODNT SEE THE NEED TO APOLOGIZE I WONT IM SICK OF SAYING SORRY, IM SICK OF PEOPLE WANTING THAT, I REFUSE TO APOLOGIZE FOR SOMETHING I CANNOT CHANGE FUCK OFFFFFFF.
Thank you everyone who has ever looked out for me thank you to my friends and mutuals, thank you to everyone who was literally ever nice to me. I HATE EVERYONE BUT YOU 💗/j
Yall I promise I’m not this mean 😭 not unless you give me a reason to (once again from my man 💙)
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minglermail · 4 months ago
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hey I heard you've been defending groomers! that's really cool!
i get these kinds of asks like once every few months about some utterly bizarre thing that either straight up does not apply to me (someone thought i enjoyed v*vziepop for some reason?? i dont even GO here help?) or is left with no context in the most unproductive way possible
idk if ur the same person but ive said it once and ill say it again... i cannot help you or others without context, id be so understanding if this was righteous anger but the way these asks get sent and never elaborated on i can only assume the people sending them are 1) mass sending these to multiple ppl or 2) arent bringing up these issues in good faith i dont mind your tone or this ask since even if uve been told misinfo or this is the result of some misunderstanding this still is Very Much A Good Thing To Be Mad About, but without elaboration nothing can really improve... if theres something/someone i dont know about thats a danger in the toontown community then i want to work with you on this (im a mod in the ttrd for example, i have ways to actively help!), no questions asked or judgments passed as long as we can both work for the greater good here
otherwise tho im just gonna ignore these since these are so vague and out of left field that i can only assume theyre like. generic bait asks sent to a lot of ppl
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transfemlogan · 5 months ago
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ok so obviously my mental health has been super fucking bad. um. for monthd jts been terrible so this is less me ranting abt sanders sides & more me having a mental break but were gonna ignore that bcuz im upset
i fucking HAAATE sanders sides fans who will defend thomas 2 the fucking death. im losing my mind.
i just saw someone say that janus acting onw way in svs & acting completely different in the grwm vid is "added depth 2 his character" . i acknowledge that character depth can be subjective but 4 the love of fucking god no it is not. that is not added depth.
character depth makes a character NOT one dimensional. current janus is VERY MUCH ONE DIMENSIONAL. he fits in2 a single trope, he does not stray from that trope. everything about him is TOLD to us, not shown. and i get that we havent actually seen him in canon sasi vids bcuz thomas cant do his job & its been 4 fucking years but holy hell. current janus is the "sassy gay man". hes the "bitchy & mean villain who doesn't care about anyone around him". he fits into THAT ONE TROPE. & does not have a DIMENSIONAL BONE IN HIS BODY. he is a remy fucking COPYCAT.IM SO MAD
svs janus while not perfect had some sort of fucking depth. janus has strayed so far from his original character that he is not the same fucking character. if u put svs janus & current janus in a room 2gether i think svs janus would kill the other.
and it SUCKS EVEN MORE. WHEN PPL CLAIM THAT A CHARACTER BEING OOC CANT BE "TRUE" IF THE "CREATOR IS WRITING 4 THEM" could u fucking imagine. imagine reading a book & the main character switches personalities midway thru w/o plot development & acts nothing like the og & the author just goes "what? its fine its my charafter i can write them 2 b how ever i want."
like 1: you obviously have never written anything in ur fucking life b4 if u think writers cant fuck up their own characters. but 2: if you ARE a writer i am EMBARRASSED. AND WORRIED FOR YOUR FUTURE WORKS. i am embarrassed for you. thats embarrassing.
its one thing 2 claim that thomas' writing is good (its not this guy cannot write) & adds depth 2 his characters (no it fucking doesnt do you KNOW. WHAT CHARACTER DEPTH IS.) but then 2 add "well actually um its his characters so who cares if its bad"
critical thinking is dead. media literacy is dead. your brains have been rotted so much 2 the point where u r a fucking idiot. i cant do this anymore. go outside & touch grass. i have 2 leave this fsndom again
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jemmo · 1 year ago
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For the ask game: 14?
thank you sm for the ask ☺
14. bl you think is underrated
ooh this is a tricky one, bc i can definitely tell you what i think is overrated (but thats not the question...), plus im always gonna think my favourites are underrated bc everyone should love them but i digress. i wanna highlight 3 shows/things bc the first one is a short series and then a movie and thats his. idk if it's bc its a few years old now but when i watched this show and then the film i just adored it. first of all, the show is the perfect kind of chill watch where not really much happens and yet a lot happens?? thats how me and my sister affectionately describe our favourite kind of shows bc they deal in the normal and everyday and manage to make it seem huge and beautiful and this series does that with one of my favourite tropes that i love to see crop up in j-bls which is an escape to the beach (and later the countryside), plus the show has the most awesome and well done early 2000s aesthetic that just fills me with nostalgia. but the film is a whole other thing. it pulls an old fashioned cupcake/cherry magic and gives us adults but unlike them shows us a story that is very grounded and real and serious, like they really said lets take this bl and actually make it a story about parenting and what a family can be and show just how complicated it all is and sometimes there is no winning and thats life. god its just beautiful, and theres still a deep and meaningful love story at the heart of it. just go watch it now if you haven't, or rewatch it if you haven't for a while.
second im picking eien no kinou and im prefacing this by saying i get why less people talk about this bc its not fun and some people dont wanna watch a story they know will be sad, but its also so important that it exists and i think it touches on some really tough topics and manages to tell them beautifully. and bc i havent seen much of what ppl say about this, idk what any consensus takes are but i felt very emotional watching this through the lens of erasure of queer relationships when it comes to loss, how sometimes when people aren't out or cant share their relationship, they become lost, or invisible, when someone is lost. and i mean... the queer experience is all-encompassing and such grief is something that should also be talked about when queerness can affect that process in a specific way, and while i dont think its easy to watch or revisit, its nevertheless important and beautiful
ive talked about some more heavy shows so i'm ending with if its with you, which is recent but even i pushed it to the side a little bc i liked i cannot reach you so much, but this show is kinda like the opposite to the ones above. i feel like people like a middle ground in their shows between drama and comfort, so while people dont talk as much about serious or sad shows, they also dont talk about the shows that are just nice. and this show is just that, bc its all about teaching someone thats had a bad experience that there is simple kindness in the world and its so heart-warming. i'll never forget the way ryuuji responded in that last ep when amane got nervous around the other kids, how he thought it would be this big think that he'd be mad about bc that's what happens in every show, but ryuuji was just like yeah its ok i understand and im not mad. just the pure kindness this show has to people feeling the way they feel is so refreshing and beautiful and it captures the high school simplicity of it all in a way that makes you step back as someone older and think huh yeah it really is just that easy, its just about happiness.
anyway, between this and the last response, i think by j-bl bias is jumping out a bit too much but thats the end of my rant, thank you for coming to my ted talk
❤️🧡💛bl ask game💚💙💜
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hoonvrs · 1 year ago
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We fr like this babes🤞
I CANNOT live a day with the worry of an argument it stresses me out so much
Alr not to vent but ive seen most ppl have this friend that they just cant say no to. Like its IMPOSSIBLE.
I have a friend like that, shes legit my closest friend. I have this trauma from like 3 years ago, she randomly just some day went "i dont wanna be friends with you anymore, r***a gives you too much attention." The girl i just metioned, my closest friend and i are a trio (theyre literally my closest friends). Back on topic HOW TF IS IT MY FAULT SHE GIVES ME TOO MUCH ATTENTION. But i was too distracted by the fact she didnt wanna be friends anymore that I didnt even realize how logicless it was. We had been friends for about 4 years back then (7 now) and i was DEVASTATED. No thats an understatement.
I was so sad that I went to my mum and cried to her for an hour straight.
After that she lowkey became controlling. Whenever i did something she didnt like, shed block me unannounced and wouldnt even tell me what pissed her off. Her anger issues are off the boundaries till today. She gets mad at the littlest of things. When i dont do something she wants she goes on to persuade me by telling me shed tell a certain someone my secrets or block me everywhere etc.
But till this day i cant unfriend her because first of all, im too scared to. Shed get all annoyed and talk behind my back shit. Secondly, forget the first one I just CANT. Whenever i wanna think of unfriending her i just get reminded of all the fun times we had all these years and end up with tears.
Besides all that, youd be surprised to believe she has been one of my best friends ever. Nobody would believe me. But in reality i love her too much to let go if
(IM SO SORRY FOR THE RANT I WAS FEELIN A LIL EMOSH TODAY 😭😭😭)
-🌜
DW ABOUT THE RANT BAE IDM
i can’t relate in the sense that my bsfs and me are a trio too but honestly ur friend sounds so toxic
i get you guys have had good times that makes u hesitate but if she’s able to get prissy and block you over her own problems and insecurities it’s really not worth it bae. no one who loves you would put you in a position where you question theyre friendship and contemplate unfriending them
and if she chats shit let her😭 people are gonna talk behind ur back regardless and i don’t wanna be the instigator here but do u really think she’s quiet whenever she gets upset or jealous and blocks you? i just think the cons outfight the pros cause no amount of good times can cover the fact that she’s genuinely stressed you out over ur friendship js cause she doesn’t wanna grow up
PEOPLE WHO CAN TAKE NO ARE THE WORRSSTTT the amount of arguments and growth i’ve had to go through with my friends rn over the last 8 years i’ve known them is crazy🫠 but sometime people need to be confronted and if ANYBODYY can’t take criticism from their best friend trust me they’ll nvr change🫥
BUT you never know, idk how old you are but friend groups and bsfs either grown into each other or out of it, it’s just life and part of it. js trust that you will grow and learn from it just try and protect ur peace
anyways i hope i don’t come off aggressive or sumn😭 im an argumentative bitch who will start an argument with anyone so ik not everyone is like me but hopefully it all ends well for u bae🫂 u deserve better
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