#im doing the writing therefor i make the rules.

[unityrain24]

btw if you see a "gRaMmAtiCaL eRrOr" in a fic of mine, know it is probably on purpose. English has a lot of stupid rules that I refuse to follow

[retrocesosdestacion]

SOCIALIZING PROBLEMS. | mapi león

mapi león x reader

genre: not fluff at all, accidental confession, teenager love.

warnings: a bit of headcanon, reader being a stupid curious, mapi confessing unintentionally, also mapi being an assertive/passive person.

notes: i had this prompt when i was cooking an egg. dios im really sorry for making u guys wait too long, also i feel like this is the worst writing I've ever done in my life.

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: You are secretly Mapi's love and you have negative impressions about her.

But that ended when Maria accidentally left her sketchbook on the bench at the locker room.

“ If I had a flower for every time I thought of you... I could walk through my garden forever. ”

Tennyson.

❝ Damn. Mapi, you should become an artist. ❞ From the other side of the locker room, you could hear Pina's lips praising the spanish's drawings once again.

It was already the fifth time that day that someone had praised the scribbles in that notebook. And you too, but only in your head. You didn't even have the courage to go there and see the drawings.

Two years ago you were transferred to Barcelona. Everything was normal, you made friends, adapted to the Spain style, adapted to new rules.

But you didn't adapt to Maria León. You didn't have the slightest ability to go up to her and have a chat lasting more than two minutes.

Normally you just greet her, that's when you don't even look at her face. Anyone who saw the two of you together would pinky swear that hated each other.

This was all because in your little mind, Mapi had the greatest disinterest in you. After all, you came to this conclusion when you noticed that the defender always ran away from the conversation when you arrives.

However, over time, you accepted this treatment from the spanish woman, even if you were curious to understand the player. You even told this whole situation to Ona, your best friend.

But it was always the same dilemma: “Relax, she’s shy. “ or “ Mapi has difficulty meeting new people. “

Yet that never made sense, after all, Mapi is anything but bashful.

It became a huge snowball since you never bothered to go talk to her. Therefore, currently your relationship with Mapi is completely lacking affection.

And it was just with you.

Claudia, for example, was one of the lucky ones. She was glued to the blonde's side, attentively observing each page of the spanish woman's small notebook with the greatest freedom and comfort.

At that moment, the defender had both feet on the bench, so she could rest the notebook on her knees. Mapi slowly leafed through the drawings for her friend once again.

❝ Yo ya te dije, who knows in a few years. ❞ (I already told you.) León reply to the other spanish woman's compliment with a very hopeful tone, as part of her dream was to be a tattoo artist.

As always, you just looked at the two girls talking, as you sat, untying your boots.

❝ If you look for longer, you will have bad luck. ❞ Ona mocked your indeterminate stare. ❝ If you’re so interested, go there. ❞ She states while taking off her training uniform.

❝ Madness. She doesn't like me and you want me to suddenly get there? ❞ You threw those words into the air so quickly that Ona took a while to formulate something.

❝ Why do you think she hates you? ❞ Your friend countered.

❝ I've told you thousands of times, Ona. She looks at me dirty, ignores me, she doesn't even want to talk to me even though I'm her training partner! ❞ You justify while gesturing nervously.

❝ Stop being fucking neurotic. ❞ The spanish woman rolled her eyes, finishing putting on her post-workout clothes. ❝ Ve allí, siéntate a su lado y descubrirás por qué te trata así. ❞ (Go there, sit next to her and you will find out why she treats you like that.) Ona stated.

You only knew the basics of spanish, deciphering what the defender had said would take a while. ❝ Huh, what? Find out what? ❞

Ona didn't respond, just giving you a stupid smile and a wink.

Slowly, the oldest left your side and walked towards Mapi and Claudia. The moment she got there, Batlle poked Pina's shoulder and approached, murmuring something in her ear.

❝ What the fuck are you doing?! ❞ You whispered to yourself, automatically standing up; scared and surprised.

Suddenly, you felt the greatest penetration of looking in your direction: Claudia Pina looked at you as if she knew all your secrets, giving you chills.

She smiled a huge and mischievous smile, raised her arm and waved it, calling you over.

Before you went, the only thing you observed was Mapi's embarrassed and awkward manner, grumbling at the two spanish women for calling you.

You thought for seconds before taking the step to go there. A whirlwind of thoughts ran through your mind, like a river heading straight for the waterfall.

What if you are a nuisance to her? What if she leaves the moment you get there?

You were very worried about the relationship with someone you don't even are intimate with.

You worry about the image you give to a person that don't even want to be your friend.

Thus, your heart began to run a marathon from the moment you started your very slow steps towards Mapi León.

Maybe you were afraid of hurting her, but at the same time yourself. As if your feelings were bubbling for the defender and you didn't want to ruin everything.

In your peripheral vision, the only notable details were María closing her notebook as quickly as a middle school student after the last bell, Claudia and Ona smiling goofily and pointing at the defender.

❝ What was it? ❞ Those were your first words when you reached the other side of the locker room, completely looking away from Mapi and just focusing on the other two.

❝ You're the only one on the team who hasn't seen Mapi's drawings, right? ❞ Claudia gave the first word, pushing León's shoulder with her elbow.

You didn't even bother to answer correctly, just opening a painful smile.

❝ Yes, I think so. ❞

After you responded, Mapi frowned, rolling her eyes. This only made you more certain that León actually hated you.

❝ But there's no need to show it. I mean, I'm not interested. ❞ They were the stupidest words that came out of your mouth.

The shine in Mapi's eyes slowly faded with each word that left your lips, the spanish woman's fingers ran to the back of her neck, uncomfortable. At this point, you should be sure that you almost hurt the girl.

❝ Don't be like that. Come on Mapi, show it. ❞ Ona finally said something in the midst of the discomfort of that conversation, lightly patting the other spanish woman on the head.

❝ I'll show you later, I need to pack my things. ❞ Maria came up with the most false excuse possible, since her things were almost one hundred percent ready. León's fingers rested on the slap, giving Ona a dirty look.

Your eyes fell on Claudia and Ona, indignant at all of this.

But you didn't know why. It wasn't as if the lack of communication between two companions would cause such great discomfort.

There was something more, you could feel it. Such something else that even Ona hides from you.

❝ Dios mío, esto es horrible. You two look like children who don't know how to talk to each other. ❞ (Oh my god, this is horrible.) Claudia gave her opinion amidst the silence.

❝ Son como dos chicas enojadas. ❞ (They're like two stupid girls. ) Batlle added.

Mapi stood up delicately, pulling the bag that was previously on the floor to the bench and opening it. ❝ Could you two shut up and get out of here, wouldn't you? ❞

The spontaneous rudeness really took you by surprise, mainly because the defender was staring at the other two, but not at you.

Pina raised her hands in defense, expressing a mere comical sadness on her face. ❝ Right. ❞

The same thing for Ona, who reached for the strap of her sports bag and put it on her left shoulder. ❝ Come on, Claudia. And don't be stupid with [reader]. ❞

❝ Que se jodan ustedes dos. ❞ (Fuck you two.) Mapi grumbled as she mock-rifled through her clothes.

Ona grabbed Claudia's arm and pulled her tightly to her feet, slowly dispersing herself from you and Mapi over time, killing the last few minutes. ❝ See you later, [reader]. ❞

Your eyes screamed for help to leave together, following the two girls until they left the main door.

Okay, now you were alone with the girl you were most afraid of.

Gradually, some people and groups would leave within minutes. Silence now, which had previously been scattered conversations, was prevailing, and that was delicious on the one hand.

After all, you loved being alone at times like this. But not with Maria.

You continued standing until Mapi offered you the bench next to her, and you did so. When you laid eyes on the spanish woman, you noticed her fingers pressing against her own temples, circling fingerprints there.

❝ I'm sorry about them. They are two idiots. ❞ León murmured as she took her fingers back to the bag, closing the zipper.

❝ Alright, no problem. I'm used to it. ❞ You responded with a typical defensive tone, unaccustomed to this type of conversation with her.

Your fingers tapped upper thigh, nervous and anxious, waiting for some miracle.

Momentarily, the spanish woman's brown globes rested on you, followed by a big sigh.

❝ I'm sorry if I'm stupid with you. And it's also bad if I didn't show you the drawings, it's just that— ❞ The defender was interrupted when Patri shouted her name.

❝ Hey, Mapi! ❞ The spanish woman appeared through the door of the main hallway. ❝ Can you check for me if my boots are dropped on the field? ❞

Maria looked at you with a roll of her optics, also accompanied by a tiny and shy smile. ❝ I'll be right back. ❞

The spanish woman slowly went to the gate that connected the changing room and the field, leaving you there freely in the area.

A dead silence remained there, there was no one else but the two of you inside that locker room, and now, only you.

Your body was still warm from training, but it could be for countless reasons, maybe because of your sudden meeting with Mapi, because of the fear of everything that happens in other conversations, happening now.

Eyes slowly took in every detail of the locker room: the ceiling, the floor, all the other stalls and even your bag on the other side.

But your orbs left for your side, where Mapi's unopened bag accidentally was. And of course, the damn sketchbook.

No, no. This is terrible, a lack of privacy. Your desire to leaf through that notebook was greater, but you should be aware.

It was only a matter of time before Mapi came back and finally opened that notebook, there was no point in leafing through it before then.

But despite everything, you were a very, very curious person.

❝ Damn. ❞ You muttered to yourself, intertwining your fingers so that you unconsciously wouldn't reach for the notebook.

But, well... Your eyes darted from side to side, making sure Maria wasn't there.

Your hand rested on the notebook, at the same time your heart accelerated so quickly as a result of your comportment. You should go back.

Slowly, you opened it enough so you could peek at the drawings. Incredibly, they were drawings of outlooks and Mapi's cats.

Despite everything, it wasn't that bad. ❝ Damn. ❞ You mumbled.

Suddenly, a folded sheet of paper fell from the middle of the pages of the notebook, falling to the floor. Your face produced a confused expression until the moment you reached the sheet.

At the same time that you were almost putting the sheet back from where it had fallen, you unfolded it.

Your heartbeat increased from the moment you caught sight of your name written there, along with a drawing of yourself and several doodles in the surrounding area.

Initials together, stick drawings of the two of you together that you were sure Claudia and Ona had scribbled, your name was written in every color there was.

There, maybe you realized why Mapi never showed you the notebook. Why Mapi hated being by your side when she was with the girls.

You could feel your face burn, turning red little by little, until it was like a pepper.

Immediately, you threw your hands up to your face, along with the sheet. You breathed once, twice and three times until you understood the situation.

❝ Shit. ❞ You mumbled to yourself with a muffled tone, still with your face hidden in your hands.

Your body slowly slid down the cabin wall, rethinking all the impressions you always had of Mapi.

You folded the sheet back and hid it in the notebook again.

Suddenly, Maria's figure slowly appeared in the locker room, mainly due to the sound of her footsteps.

Your torso rose, you became so desperate that you completely forgot to let go of the notebook in your hand.

Mapi slowly stopped walking and stopped in the middle of the locker room the moment her eyes fell on your hand with the notebook.

Slowly, her lips opened ready to say something. However, the spanish's internal desperation probably prevented this.

❝ I didn't see anything, I swear. ❞ Was the only thing you could say before throwing the notebook back onto the bench and waving your hands in defense.

Maria completely changed her route, walking quickly towards you. The moment she reached you, the player grabbed your hands and squeezed.

❝ Puedo explicarlo, en serio. ❞ (I can explain it, seriously.) Mapi stuttered between words and even forgot to say them in english.

The spanish woman's face didn't even bother to hide her embarrassment. You could feel the player's fingers trembling and of course, the strong desire to cry.

❝ I thought it was cute. ❞ In the midst of all the tension, these were your stupid words. Giving a short smile, which perhaps calmed León.

❝ What? ❞ Mapi asked, raising one of her eyebrows.

❝ The drawing. ❞

❝ But you said you didn't see anything. ❞ Maybe you didn't expect her to be so naive.

❝ I'm not going to lie, I saw everything. ❞ You answer with a defensive intonation, after all, you had no idea what would happen from now on. ❝ Even those scribbles on the sid— ❞

❝ That was the girls idea. ❞ Mapi justified it so quickly, was probably true.

It was at that moment that you realized that María León was not angry or disgusted with you. Mapi was actually in love with you and was ashamed to admit it.

This all explained the insults and scandals she made whenever the girls played with her. You were the concern of all the jokes.

❝ Right. First breathe. ❞ You advised the spanish girl to calm down, after all, she was shaking more than anything.

❝ Let me explain, please. I don't want you to get it wrong. ❞ Mapi begged to hold an explaination.

❝ Go ahead. ❞

❝ I'm not some kind of stalker, okay? I only drew you because, well… Because I like you and I thought you were pretty. ❞ The defender gets confused in her own words.

You were sure that wasn't what she wanted, Mapi didn't want to confess like that stupid way.

❝ But I completely understand if you think I'm crazy like that... ❞ Mapi slowly closed her eyes, trying to throw all the despair inside. ❝ Dios mío, ¿qué carajo estoy diciendo? ❞ (Oh my god, what the fuck am I saying?)

❝ Hey, it's okay... I guess. ❞ You tried to calm down from the moment you felt León's fingers slowly slip from your hands.

Your mind enfolded the sight of Mapi in front of you, it was the only thing you could pay attention to.

Heart felling affliction, a feeling full of pity for the whole situation that Maria went through made you think a lot.

While you had the wrong impression of her, Mapi couldn't control own feelings.

❝ I don't know what to say about all this. ❞ You produced a sentence where you could try to be understandable with it. ❝ I thought you hated me. ❞

❝ What? Why?! ❞ León was really shocked.

❝ Huh… You always sounded or looked ignorant to me. But it wasn't bad, I had the wrong impression. ❞ Your lips moved automatically, everything you kept about her these two years finally escaped.

Mapi gave a short smile, perhaps your words sounded funny. ❝ Yo nunca debí contarles a Ona y Claudia sobre ti. ❞ (I should never have told Ona and Claudia about you.) The spanish woman muttered to herself, but you still understood.

❝ And now knowing that you like me was such a turning point. ❞ You explained yourself without letting go of Mapi's hands for a second. ❝ By the way, about that… ❞

❝ No need to explain yourself, I'll understand if you don't reply— ❞

❝ No. I want it. I mean, I think you won my heart after seeing your drawings. ❞ Your typical comedic tone caused few laughs between the two of you.

❝ And also, it really hurt me to get the impression that you hated me. I've been making you a fool all this time. ❞ You continued.

Mapi León paid attention to every word that left your lips. There, you noticed how the player stopped shaking and stuttering, finally taking comfort.

❝ No. I understand, I would have that impression too if I saw all of this. ❞

❝ But I hope we can go back and start over from scratch. ❞ You looked for the solution.

Despite everything, Mapi was very understandable with words, she just needed time to express herself.

Suddenly, León's brown orbs looked to the side, perhaps worried about something. ❝ I think we better go, I need to tell Patri about the boots. ❞

Mapi let go of your hands, and for a moment you didn't like that feeling. The spanish woman's fingerprints grabbed the famous intriguing notebook, putting it back in her bag.

Initially she carried the bag on her shoulder, waiting for you to do the same. Your feet lifted and strained toward your own bag, but immediately returned to Mapi's side.

❝ If you want to start from scratch, come with me. I'll stop at a coffee shop before heading home. ❞ León opened a genuine smile, extending her right hand towards you.

You got the signal, and you did it. Your long fingerprints met Mapi's, intertwining them.

❝ Yes, please. ❞

Maybe you should leave everything in the hands of time and, gingerly, the two of you would transform disagreements into affection.

Gradually, your relationship with Mapi stopped being lack of love and became the fruit of devotion. Walking alongside her was the best opportunity for that.

❝ ¡Quiero un frappuccino, por favor! ❞ (I'd like a frappuccino, please!) You used the spanish words that you knew, asking with a great enthusiasm. After all, from now you would use that dialect a lot more.

Really more.

[crownmemes]

Advice; Everyone Should Be Making the First Move

There's been a trend within the rpc here for years now where nobody is willing to make the first move. The problem with this is that if nobody ever makes the first move, then nobody is ever going to write anything. Considering that, everybody should be making an effort to be the first one to reach out to their writing partners more often.

Examples of making the first move:

Sending an IM to say hi, then suggesting a plot

Sending a meme to start a new thread

Responding to starter calls and open starters

All of this is just as valid for old partners as it is for new. If you haven't written with someone in a while, maybe it's time to reach out to start a new thread?

The most common reason I see for people not making the first move is social anxiety. I'm going to give you all a bit of tough love here: speaking as somebody who once had crippling social anxiety (and still does in irl settings), the best way to overcome it is to push yourself to try the things that make you anxious.

Communicating with people is a really important part of rp because it's not a solo hobby, therefore you are going to have to talk to people at some point. It's unavoidable. Here are a few reminders to help you feel a little less nervous:

If somebody follows back, they're doing it because they're interested in writing with you. They are not going to be upset if you send them an IM with plot ideas

Most people are friendly! In 12 years of rping on this site, I can count on one hand the number of people who I've talked to that were actively rude to me

It's okay if someone says no to you! People have different styles and not all of them will work together. If someone says no, say thank you for the consideration, then move on. There are more people to write with out there

If somebody is nasty to you, you can block them. Don't be afraid to do this; you don't have to explain yourself, and you wouldn't want to write with someone who's rude to you anyway

If you're not sure what to say, I usually go with a version of "Hello! Thank you for following/following back! I've looked through your rules and about pages. Would you be interested in plotting something for X and my character, Y? I have an idea already, if you would like to hear?"

Don't just say "Hi!". Cut to the chase and tell them why you're messaging so they immediately know what the conversation is about

Reasons why it's good to message first:

You look actively interested in writing. This is a huge boost in your favour when it comes to asking to write with someone

It makes it a lot easier to get new interactions

It makes you appear more active

If you're a new blog, you won't have a lot of examples of your writing on your blog yet. People will be more willing to give you a chance if you approach them first

If you don't message first, you are likely to be waiting a long time before somebody messages you

It's easier to make friends if you have an active conversation!

Some other thoughts on messaging first:

You have followed the person because you are interested in writing with them. Think about why you are interested, and suggest this as a plot idea

Make sure you read through the rules still. It's very obvious when you haven't. Also, look through the muses on offer so you can suggest which you'd like to write with

If the rules say they're not mutuals only, or that you're welcome to IM to introduce yourself if you want to plot, don't be afraid to message. They wouldn't have put that in their rules if they didn't mean it

If someone is reblogging memes, it's because they want to write responses to them. Send them in! If they didn't want them sent in, they wouldn't have reblogged the meme

IMing to plot is often a better idea than liking a starter call or sending memes if you have never interacted with the person before. It gives you a chance to work out what kind of thread would work well before you start something, so the resulting thread has a lower chance of fizzling out quickly

However, all that being said, it's not just up to the person messaging first to make all the effort. If the receiver doesn't put any effort in in return, then the person making the first move is going to think they aren't interested. Eventually, they may give up messaging people at all, because what's the point if it never goes anywhere? Some tips for not seeming uninterested:

If someone IMs you, try to reply to them in a timely fashion. Especially try to reply to them if they sent you a plot idea. You don't have to agree to do the idea - it's just very annoying to be ghosted the second you actually start plotting

Suggest your own plot ideas in return, or build on the idea that the other person has given you

If you agree to write a starter, or one is written for you, follow through with it. Write the starter, reply to the thread. If it's going to take a while, let your writing partner know that you've seen it but you're going to be slow for a while

Similarly, if you post memes, reply to the ones people send you. If you never reply, people will pick up on this and eventually stop sending you things

If you go on hiatus, message your writing partners directly when you get back to let them know you'd like to write again. This will demonstrate that you really are active and ready to write again

[honeytonedhottie]

for rest and relaxation⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🎐

GIVE YOURSELF TIME ;

give yourself time to rest and relax and focus entirely on yourself and feeling better. choose a specified amount of time to just rest. this frees up time for inner work, healing etc. during that time identify the "why" to which u feel the way that you do.

identifying the issue helps you, after the rest and relaxation, to understand what it is that u need to focus on the most. therefore u can formulate goals suited to deal with the issue. set some ground rules before you start your resting period so that then your not going to be moving backwards on your goals.

RESTFUL MOVING ;

when u rest its important to not just sit at 0%. what i mean by that is always do at least a little something. when u make it a habit to just give 0% and do absolutely nothing, you'll find that things that u worked for will start to deteriorate and ur health both mentally and physically will be worse then when u started which isnt the point of rest at ALL.

im not saying that while ur resting and relaxing you have to be doing a whole workout or running x amount of miles. what im saying is that whilst resting do 1% of that. an example of restful moving could be...

dance when u wake up - i saw this in a tiktok and basically the logic behind this is that when ur dancing ur giving your body freedom and fluidity that translates to ur brain as well. so that then ur not so stiff and rigid and it improves ur mood.

DURING THE ROT ;

something that i find interesting to do is that while ur rotting, document it and write out what u do/did while rotting. that way when ur done with ur rest and relaxation you can look back and see what u did. doing so can also help u see what u needed or easily identify what was wrong/what sent u into rot.

ways i spend my resting time : setting aside time to think, write in my journal. spending time girlblogging, working on projects and formulating ideas. spending quality time with my dog. watching shows that i have on my watch list. reading lots and lots of books, manga etc. taking frequent naps and writing down the dreams that i've had. doom-scrolling on tiktok. watching true crime video essays.

AFTER THE ROT ;

if you haven't read my post the feel better formula, i rly recommend that u do so that then u can see the how to get out of that rot. but if u haven't read the post i'll quickly go over the points here.

listening to music and dancing

listen to songs that give you dopamine and just songs that you'd feel comfortable dancing to. in the feel better formula post i mentioned that twice gives me lots of dopamine so whenever i need some i listen to their songs.

practicing self care

getting ready everyday has been a game changer for me. even if ur not going out after ur rot just get ready as though you were. get into some cute clothes, practice self care, do ur makeup

a nice long journalling session

my journalling routine is update my diary 2x a week and do a shadow work session 1x a week. but for my longer journaling sessions i'll do an extended shadow work session and journal and get out whatevers on my mind onto paper.

(self care activity + something that engages ur mind + REAL rest + movement + hobby = feeling better).

SOME WAYS TO RELAX ;

sound bath ; sound healing is something that’s been interesting to learn about for me. so the concept of a sound bath is just relaxing and bathing yourself in sound frequencies as a way to relieve stress, healing, and general wellness. 

how i like to do it, is i’ll just look up “sound bath” on youtube and while im stretching or just laying down i’ll listen to it and it’s so soothing! or i listen to these subliminals by i want it i got it and they have frequencies in them so i do that as well. 

at home spa day ; reference this post bcuz it gives a little at home spa day routine.

[inlovewithpandora]

- My Heart -

Pairing: Aged!up Tsireya (18) x fem! Metkayina!deaf!reader (18)

Synopsis: You and Tsireya have been friends for years and you’ve always wondered if she liked you. You felt like there was a spark between the both of you until something happened and blew the fire away… or did it?

Content: childhood friends to lovers, slight angst, miscommunication, a little hurt w/ comfort, super fluffy, kiss at the end, courting gift, courting proposal

Author’s Note: This only took me two days to write! Writing for Tsireya is so fun for me, Im going to try and write for her more often! (So if you have requests for her feel free to send them in)

- ‘Sentences bolded and italicized indicates signing’

- Please excuse any mistakes!

Word Count: 3.2k

Glossary: Tsakarem - Tsahìk in training || Skxawng - idiot,moron || yawntutsyìp - little loved one, darling || Olo'eyktan - Clan Leader || Tsahìk - Spiritual Leader

Extra: requests are open! Please read rules prior to requesting!

Links: Navigation || Masterlist || Taglist

Ever since you were a small child you knew you were different. You couldn't hear the ocean waves crashing into the sand, the laughter of children playing, or the voices of your parents when they attempted to communicate with you.

When your parents noticed that you didn't react to loud noise, them calling your name, or anything else related to hearing they immediately took you to the Tsahìk hoping that she could cure you.

Ronal tried multiple rituals, herbs, and techniques but nothing was successful.

That's when you were deemed deaf.

You were never mad or sad that Eywa made you this way. You felt like the Great Mother blessed you with a deep connection to her world. You always believed that not having one sense heightened your others.

Wherever you looked or touched you could feel her presence. The wind gliding across your skin, the coolness of the ocean water as you swam around, looking at the beautiful aquatic creatures, and the way your body absorbed the sun's warmth.

You admired every aspect and detail of Pandora.

You always loved collecting shells and incorporating them into your latest hairstyle, weaving them into necklaces, bracelets, or gorgeous headpieces.

Growing up you didn't have many friends due to your condition. Children in the village weren't fond of being your companion because they felt like you wouldn't be able to keep up with them.

You and Tsireya met for the first time when both of you were ten years old, she had seen you walking around the village multiple times and she always wondered why you were alone. One day Tsireya and Ronal were walking to their marui when Tsireya saw you from afar, sitting in the sand drawing different images with your fingers.

"Mother, why is she always alone? Why doesn't she talk to anyone?" Tsireya questioned her mother

"She is deaf yawntutsyìp therefore she cannot speak since she's never learned how. Whenever someone tries to speak to her she can't hear them" Ronal knew how much of a loving and caring heart her daughter had and she knew that Tsireya wanted to get to know you, "Maybe you should go play with her one day, I know she would love your company"

And the next day Tsireya came up to you in hopes to create a friendship. You were doing your normal routine, playing in the sand. As you drew pictures of your favorite fish you felt a tap on your shoulder which startled you a little. You turned around and came face to face with Tsireya, 'Hi, I'm Tsireya what's your name?' she signed to you with a friendly, bright smile

'I'm y/n'

'Do you want to make necklaces with me?' Tsireya gestures to the basket next to her filled with woven string, shells, polished stones, and other materials.

You were surprised by her offer. That someone wanted to do an activity with you, especially the Olo'eyktan's and Tsahìk's daughter, 'Yes I would like that. Necklaces are my favorite thing to make' you sign to her, feeling a sense of excitement swirl inside you.

Tsireya sat down next to you and placed the basket in between both of you and began to create beautiful necklaces to wear around the village. That was one of your favorite childhood memories, the day you made your first friend.

—

After that day, both of you were inseparable from each other including today. Both of you were now eighteen and were still stuck to the hip. Every day you and Tsireya spent together her heart filled with love for you.

She loved watching you teach young Na'vi children sign language. The way you were patient with them, the excitement on your face when they mastered a new word or sentence, and the passion you showed while teaching them new things.

You and Tsireya would spend any waking moment together. While Tsireya did her clan duties she would always ask you to tag along with her and of course, you didn't mind. Some days while her and Ronal would work on creating new healing herbs you would sit in the corner quietly, just observing, and sometimes Ronal would let you assist.

Tsireya had such an effect on you. The way your body tingles when she taps you to get your attention, the way your heart skips a beat when she signs your name gracefully, and you absolutely loved it when both of you would sneak out at night and stargaze under the beautiful moonlight.

Even though you had love for her, you never wanted to admit it out loud. You felt like Tsireya could do so much better than you. Multiple people wanted to be Tsireya's future mate which you knew. She had multiple potential suitors, hearing suitors.

Your deafness made you feel inadequate because you would never be able to hear her speak sweet nothings to you, if you ever decided to adopt children you wouldn't even be able to hear their giggles, and if they got hurt you couldn’t speak comforting words to them. Just the thought of it that and more made you feel insecure that you couldn't provide Tsireya what she deserves in a significant other.

For the past few weeks, you and Tsireya haven't been spending as much time together, due to her teaching the Sully children the way of water. You wished you could see her more often but you knew she had a numerous amount of duties due to her being tsakarem.

Since Tsireya wasn't around as much you've been spending more time with Ronal, helping her with her duties which she didn't mind because she loved having you around.

'y/n go get Tsireya for me, she should still be at the beach teaching the Sully children' Ronal requested as she organized her collection of herbs.

You nodded in response, pushing yourself on your feet and began walking towards the beach. As you walked you were getting slight butterflies at the thought of seeing Tsireya. You haven't seen her all day so you were anticipating seeing her beautiful face and feeling her touch.

As your feet planted on the sand you begin to look around for Tsireya but you didn't see her, as you wander around the beach you ran into Ao'nung, 'Ao'nung, have you seen Tsireya? Your mother is asking for her' you signed to him hoping he could help you with your search for his sister

'Oh yeah her and that skxawng are over there' he signed with an annoyed look at the mention of Lo'ak

'Okay thank you' you begin to walk over to the place Aonung said Tsireya was.

As you walk to the other end of the beach you see Lo'ak and Tsireya sitting next to each other. Right when you were about to make your presence known and walk into their line of sight you saw Tsireya place her hands on Lo’ak’s chest.

When you saw the way Lo'ak looked at her, the way his eyes frantically tried to avert her gaze as he blushed made your face contort. The way Tsireya touched him didn't seem platonic, it seemed loving, the way you wanted her to touch you she touched him and it made you feel multiple emotions at once.

As you continued to watch them your stomach began to churn. Watching the person you love be with someone else in this way made you feel disgusted. You couldn't believe that she was into Lo'ak, she never said anything about him that gave the notion that she liked him so you were taken aback.

You could see Lo'ak begin to lean in and that just sent you over the top, you had enough. You turned your heels in the sand and stormed away. Knowing that they were kissing right now made you feel an agonizing pain in your heart, you felt so stupid for having feelings for Tsireya when you knew that her heart could belong to another.

You felt dumb for thinking someone, thinking Tsireya, the next heir of the Tsahìk title could ever love someone like you.

You didn't even walk back to Ronal's marui. You went to your marui instead and began to sulk, cry, whatever you needed to do so this melancholic feeling could subside.

—

You've been avoiding Tsireya for almost a week now. Every time you say her even attempt to walk in your direction you turned the other way. You couldn't even look at her without seeing an image of her and Lo'ak, the thought of her loving him made your skin crawl.

Currently, you and Kiri were talking while sitting at the pier, 'Kiri I love your shawl, your going to have to show me how to make one'

'Yes, of course, you can come by my mauri tomorrow and I'll show you'

As you and Kiri continued laughing and conversing your mind couldn't do anything except drift off to Tsireya. As much as you wanted to get her out of your head you couldn't and thinking of her not seeing you the way you saw her just made you feel sick to the stomach.

'y/n what's wrong? Are you okay?' Kiri noticed how your once happy expression turned downcast in a matter of seconds

'I saw Lo'ak and Tsireya together almost a week ago' As your hands moved your eyes held nothing but sadness, just talking about the situation made tears want to evade your eyes.

Kiri saw your expression and she was slightly confused, she didn’t understand why you would be saddened by that, ‘Why is that bothering you?’

‘Because…’ you hesitated on signing the rest of the sentence. You felt like if you signed it, it would feel too real, ‘I like Tsireya but she doesn’t like me back’

It all clicked for Kiri, she noticed how you’ve been avoiding Tsireya and it all made sense to her, you were lovesick, ‘oh y/n, I’m so sorry come here’ Kiri pulled you into a hug, rubbing your back in a comforting manner.

As Kiri comforted you, you could see someone walking in the distance. Once the person got closer you could see their face. It was Tsireya, the person you didn’t want to see.

you pulled back from Kiri’s embrace and pushed yourself onto your feet, 'I'm sorry Kiri, I have to go' As you signed your eyes began glossy from unshed tears. If you stood there another minute you felt like you would breakdown completely so you just took off.

As Tsireya watched you scurry off it made her ears pin to her skull, she couldn't understand why you'd been avoiding her. She has missed you dearly. She missed hearing your laugh and watching your face light up with a smile. She couldn’t understand why you’ve been so distant all of a sudden so she was determined to get to the bottom of it.

She walked up to her Kiri and began to ask her questions, “Do you know what’s wrong with y/n? She’s been avoiding me and I don’t understand why”

“Well… I don’t feel like it’s my place to say…” Kiri didn’t want to out your feelings because she didn’t know if Tsireya knew how you felt about her or not.

“Please Kiri, I need your help” Kiri could hear the desperation in her voice, she knew that Tsireya really wanted to know how to fix it with you.

“All I’m going to say is talk to her. The reason she’s avoiding can be fixed with honest and open conversation”

“Okay, I’ll go talk to her, right now. Thank you Kiri” Tsireya began to walk around the village with a determined look on her face, trying to find you so she could make this right.

—

You were sitting on the edge of your bed crying, wondering why you felt so upset about this. You knew that Tsireya could have feelings for another person but deep down you hoped to Eywa it was you, that she felt a burning desire for you.

As the tears flowed freely down your cheeks, you began to see a shadow of someone walking inside your marui. When Tsireya walked in she saw you frantically wiping your tears which made her feel a twinge of pain in her heart.

‘Why are you here?’

‘Because I haven’t talked to you in almost a week, you’ve been avoiding me and I want to know why’

You began shaking your head. You didn’t want to tell her because you felt like it didn’t matter. You figured there was no point in telling her your true feelings if she didn’t like you back, ‘No Tsireya, I’m not telling you’

Tsireya's face began to contort into a confused expression, ‘Why not?’

‘Because it doesn’t matter anymore Tsireya’

‘Why doesn’t it matter? Tell me, I want to make this right, I want to know what’s bothering you’ Tsireya placed her hands on your shoulder, gliding her thumb against your skin lightly.

Oh how you missed her touch, the way her hands felt against your skin made you want to melt into a puddle but all you could do is think about how that same hand was on Lo’ak, ‘Stop Tsireya’ you stand up abruptly and walk over to the other side of your mauri. You could feel all the sadness stir into another emotio, Anger.

‘Stop what?’

‘Touching me, just stop okay?! Why don’t you go and touch Lo’ak!’ Your hands were being to move at the speed of light, the more you signed to her your heartbeat began to increase.

‘Touch Lo’ak? What are you talking about?’

‘I saw you and him at the end of the beach, you put your hands on his chest and then he leaned and… kissed you’

‘y/n wait that’s not-’

‘You know I really thought you could like me, that you would see me the way I see you but it’s clear that you like him instead of me. I feel like such a skxawng for thinking you would want someone like me, someone who can’t even give you what you need in a mate’

From this moment there was no going back for you, you were starting to ramble and there was no possible way to take back any of your words. You didn’t want her to find out that you liked her this way but it was too late.

‘You deserve someone who can listen to your problems. Someone who can vocally tell you words of love and affection, someone, who has the same abilities as you and I can’t provide any of that’ Your hands began to shake as you signed, sobs began to try and emerge from your throat but you tried your best to reduce them.

‘I know you love another and I can’t help but be upset, I can’t provide you with things as he can and it makes me feel horrible’

The only thing Tsireya could do is shake her head, the way she saw you talk about yourself saddened her. She feels dumb for not telling you her true feelings before. She felt like if she would’ve admitted her fondness for you this whole thing would’ve been avoided.

‘y/n, I do not like Lo’ak’

‘You don’t?’

‘No, what you saw was me working with him on his breathing lessons and he interpreted it as flirting. When he leaned in attempting to kiss me I told him that my heart already belonged to someone’

Tsireya walked up to you and placed your hand on her chest, letting you feel her heartbeat.

As your hand made contact with her skin, you felt shivers run down your spine. The anger and sadness you felt in your heart were replaced with joy, the joy that your assumption about her liking Lo’ak was false.

‘My heart belongs to you, it always has. From the moment we met as children, I knew you were special and you are. I do not need to hear you vocally speak because you speak to me with your heart. I don’t need to hear your words when I know they are genuine and kind. I don’t need your words when just your touches and your presence is enough, all I need is you y/n’

As you saw Tsireya’s words, seeing how she felt about you made you become overwhelmed with emotion. Your lips began to tremble as you attempted to hold yourself together. This was the moment you’d been waiting on for years, to know that Tsireya loved you just like you loved her.

‘You are not inadequate because you can’t hear like me, it only makes you unique from everyone else. The way you see the world is amazing. The way you care for Eywa, our clan, the young na’vi you teach’ Tsireya takes a small breath, feeling a tear fall down her cheek, ‘The way you love and care for me speaks volumes to where you don’t have you to’

‘I can’t fathom living this life another second without having you by my side…’ Tsireya reaches into her pouch that is around her waist and pulls out a beautiful necklace adorned with small iridescent seashells and delicate beads.

‘I would love nothing more than to court you’ she smiles brightly, the same bright smile she gave you eight years ago when she introduced herself to you. She was still that kind and patient person you meet many years ago, she was the same person you fell in love with.

Your stomach immediately began doing backflips, it felt like butterflies were fluttering inside you. The thought of Tsireya courting you made your heart swell to an unreasonable amount, ‘I would love for you to court me, nothing would make me happier Tsireya’

Tsireya's tail began to swing excitedly behind her, she was filled with bliss that you agreed. As you noticed the movement of her tail it made you let out a small laugh. The same laugh that Tsireya missed, the laugh that could brighten up her day no matter the circumstances.

‘Can you put the necklace on me?’

‘Of course, I can’

As you lifted your hair Tsireya placed the necklace around your neck with ease. You rubbed your fingertips against the smooth shell and all you could do is smile. You couldn’t believe Tsireya just asked to court you, everything happened so fast but everything felt so right. You wouldn’t want it any other way.

As Tsireya stood in front of you her oceanic eyes were staring at you in awe, she couldn’t believe that she had someone as beautiful as you. She felt like the luckiest Na’vi on Pandora to have you.

To her, you were one in a million.

Tsireya gracefully moved her hands up to your face, gently caressing your cheek. Your breathing began to increase slightly, you were in anticipation about what was going to occur next.

Tsireya pulls you into her, pressing her lips gently on yours. As your lips collided you felt a warmth fill your chest.

The kiss was soft yet fiery.

You could almost taste Tsireya’s desire for you on her lips, it made you feel amazing that you could make her this happy and that she felt loved by you.

When you and Tsireya finally broke the kiss you felt the need to gasp for air, you felt breathless yet you loved every second of what just occurred.

As you looked at Tsireya her cheeks were painted bright red, you could tell she loved the kiss just as much as you, ‘I see you y/n, I’ll forever see you’

‘I see you, my heart will forever belong to you’

I hope you enjoyed💗!

Previous fic

Like, comments, and reblogs are highly appreciated💗!

A/N - I’ve been wanting to write a fic like this for a while and @ghoul-bonez convinced me to finally do it! Check out her story ‘I love you, I see you, I trust you’ (Ao’nung x Fem! Deaf! Sully! Reader)

- Also let me know how y’all feel about this type of story because I have more character x deaf!reader ideas

Taglist: @number1gal @liyahsocorro @iwantjaketosullyme @fanboyluvr @kapyzkms @ladespedidas @navegaluv @teyamsbitch @haileymsstuff @onlyloaksgf @kierys-blog @myh3artttt @julyytsireya @gamerxpfighter @h3l3na-pandora @skyv-n @potatoknishesofficial69 @downbadforloak @yetanotherattemptatanaccount @yeosxxx @bakugouswaif @hc-geralt-23 @iluvpandorawomen @myheartfollower

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[corviiids]

hello if you are still accepting death note submissions, how about astarion

amazing submission thank you

verdict: no to both investigative questions. could astarion beat kira? probably, but not the normal way.

could astarion intuit the mechanics of the death note

no.

could astarion identify light yagami

no.

listen. i love astarion very much. he's very clever. but only in all the wrong directions. he has no ability to plan ahead. or really plan at all. he's too impatient to sit around and analyse clues. his plan for beating cazador was to walk into cazador's palace fuck around and find out. 10000% he couldn't beat light at his own game, so that's out, but honestly it might be more effective to beat light yagami NOT at his own game (like ending a chess game by just upending the chessboard) because L tried that and it didn't really work out.

what im saying is if the rest of the worm gang figures out that light is kira, astarion could probably beat him from there. but if you left astarion to his own devices and went "can you find kira" he'd give up.

i do think he might like, accidentally eat light or something though. that counts.

could astarion survive

ok here we run into some interesting questions. for the other ones ive been kind of waffling between whether im putting the character in the death note universe but borrowing their contextual abilities from their own universe, vs putting light yagami/kira/etc into the character's universe... i think due to baldur's gate being the way it is we have to put light in bg3, because astarion's backstory is so contextual and historical you cant really remove him from it while preserving all the relevant factors. what im talking about is two things

can light yagami figure out astarion's surname

what happens if you write an undead person's name in the death note

which are linked - because does light know that astarion is a vampire and therefore undead? the most straightforward way to find astarion's surname is to find his tombstone, but in order to do that light would have to know that astarion had died.

more to the point, the first rule of the death note is:

The human whose name is written in this note shall die.

where we run into TWO problems. the death note takes place in the 'real' world where there are only humans and obvious non-humans (ie animals and shinigami), so there's really no need to make any finer distinction.

but astarion is 1) an elf and 2) a vampire. so does the death note work on elves?? maybe? but an undead vampire ISN'T a human, not in the normal sense and also not in the extrapolated sense where you can assume elves and humans having similar personhood probably have the same rules apply. vampires are undead! that's very different! you cant kill a vampire with a heart attack!!! his heart isn't even working!!!

ALSO

You cannot kill humans at the age of 124 or over with the Death Note.

if we say aging stops when vampires die the first time, then astarion was 39, but then we're saying he's dead, in which case he probably can't die again. if we say aging continues as a vampire, then he's over 200, and he's excluded by this rule.

so i feel like astarion survives due to some stupid loophole.

[naavispider]

OMG OMG OMG

I remember reading an idea sort of like this ages ago. But I can’t remember if it was an avatar fic or smth else 💀

have you ever seen the golden compass? The movie with the spirit animal daemon things???? well, I rewatched that yesterday and I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

so, imagine Spider’s daemon spends his entire childhood flicking through forms. The first being a gigantic spider, and the second a blond, shaggy furred dog. Only, when (insert daemons name here) finally settles, he’s a beautiful orange tiger.

this, at first, would be wonderful. (Both bc tigers r fucking cool and second bc it has symbolism from the start of the first movie when tigers are brought back from extinction - it would be the first time Jake or any other humans see a true orange tiger).

BUT BUT BUT‼️ when quaritch was alive his form was ALSO a tiger - a white one - with the same gruesome three-strike scar along its eye m. Bc I’ve decided daemons and humans share scars.

OR OR OR‼️‼️‼️ spiders daemon settles in a desperate attempt to protect him when they meet the recoms for the first time‼️‼️‼️ AAAAAAAAA

I would imagine that Navi don’t have daemons. And they don’t understand the connection between daemon and human. So, therefore, spider doesn’t really get it either. He just sees his worst fear realised and believes his daemon is betraying him.

THIS ALSO MEANS‼️‼️ Recoms might have Pandora daemons‼️ I would imagine some of them would have ikrans as their daemon, zdog would defo have one of those purple bat things and Lopez would have a viper wolf I don’t make the rules. But quaritch would definitely have a giant thanator.

and when they are being pulled up into the ship- or any other time ig - Quaritch’s thanator (who is male, spiders daemon is also - pretty sure it’s like uncommon for daemons to be the same sex as the holder but that’s just how I pictured them) would totally have spiders daemon held by his scruff in his mouth that would be so cute.

ALSO ALSO OMG IM HAVING SO MANY JDEAS JUST WRITING THIS. They would torture spider INSTEAD OF THE MACHINE - they would try to separate him from his daemon like they do in the golden compass ‼️

My original idea was for humans to be shapeshifters. Mainly bc I totally wanted that held bu the scruff scene - but it’s actually quaritch doing it not his daemon. But also, the idea of a thanator daemon grooming a growly tiger daemon is so cute to me.

daemons show people’s true emotions. So spiders daemon is definitely as scared at the beginning, but visibly relaxes very quickly I’d assum - especially around quaritch. And I totally want an over protective thanator pacing the outskirts of their camp every night - lingering on the place spider is sleeping.

sorry for rambling, legit typed this out in three minutes I was so enthusiastic I was shaking. I have another idea from ages ago that I still need to type up - just bc I wanna share ♥️♥️

Hellooo old friend 💞

Firstly I'm soooo sorry it has taken me this long to respond. Life's been crazy and I've got a promotion/new job which is draining all my mental energy. I've not really been able to write anything at all in the past few weeks and it's making me sad 😭

This prompt is incredible and I 100% agree with the imagery of Quaritch's daemon holding Spider's by the scruff of the neck 😭 I don't have names for them (but I think Spider's one would be a girl) so here's some headcanons.

Quaritch's daemon is a thanator and Spider's is a tiger. As they are both full sized I think this makes for a very interesting concept. Spider's daemon settled after a huge argument with Neytiri a few years ago when she banned him from coming round. (They got over the argument like in the comics but ever since then Spider has an added resentment towards Neytiri because he was desperately hoping his daemon would settle as a creature from Pandora. He feels that if they never fought then he wouldn't be 'shackled' with an Earth daemon, which only adds to his 'alienness' in the clan's eyes.)

At the beginning of the movie Quaritch is almost sure straight away about who Spider is, because the daemon is a dead give away. (I don't know the lore from Golden Compass if characters are like,, born with their daemon or what, but in this AU the fact that Spider's is a tiger is a major give away for Quaritch).

"Miles?" He asks when suddenly a tiger emerges, growling, from the bushes to protect Spider.

Spider has seen enough of Q's video logs to recognise him, too.

The kids are not only surrounded by a dozen recoms but also all of their daemons. Z-dog's is a viperwolf, which pins Tuk down on the ground while Prager's prolemuris attacks Lo'ak. Wainfleet still grabs Kiri and works out that they are Sully's kids.

"Let them go!" Spider yells as he lunges for Wainfleet and his tiger launches itself at Z-dog's viperwolf.

Then, Quaritch's daemon emerges from the trees, silencing the kids with its presence. It goes straight for Spider's tiger, pinning it down easily. Spider yelps as he feels the bite of the thanator around his daemon's jugular. Quaritch commands the thanator to ease up a bit, but still keeping the tiger trapped.

"How are you alive?" Spider growls.

"Your daddy backed up his memories. All his personality too. It was all saved onto a drive and uploaded into... me."

"Let them go..!" (he's struggling because of the thanator's grip on his daemon)

Quaritch smirks, turning his back on his son as he radios command.

Cut to the parents arriving and all hell breaking loose. Q's thanator releases Spider's tiger when a blast goes off right next to them. Spider and his daemon run like Hell. The tiger is only slightly faster than Spider, but the thanator is in hot pursuit. (once again my lack of knowledge about the golden compass lets me down because idk how far Quaritch and his thanator can be separated, but let's say Quaritch catches up fast). When the blast causes Spider to fall down the bank he is initially knocked out but his tiger isn't, and stands guard to protect him, growling, when Q approaches.

The tiger tries to fight the thanator, but ofc is easily overpowered because of the size of the thanator.

Spider is groaning slightly as Quaritch pulls him over his shoulders, but he's too out of it from the fall to be able to prevent himself being carried off

He is aware that he can't see his daemon, and suddenly panic sets in. He knows the recoms could easily hurt her to hurt him.

The adrenaline kicks in enough for him to lift his head and scour the forest through weary eyes - his tiger is being carried in the jaws of Quaritch's thanator a few paces behind them. "Get off!" he tries to yell.

(don't ask me how the daemons are lifted into the demon ship)

At first, Spider and the tiger are thrown into the same cell. They huddle together for warmth at night and the tiger does a good job scratching up the door and tearing down the security camera.

The only person who can handle the two of them is Quaritch, because of his daemon, so it's a struggle to get Spider into the Neuroscanner, and there are some nasty fights between the tiger and the thanator, resulting in a lot of pain for Spider.

The neuroscanner is useless though because spider doesn't give them anything, so eventually they decide to bypass the ethics board and separate Spider from his daemon. Quaritch does not know about this (and like in the golden compass) enters just in time to see them doing this to his son. He's able to stop Ardmore and eventually Q convinces her to let him take Spider out into the field.

When Spider is faces with seeing Q again, he has the full stoic facade, but his tiger is trying not to cower and is trembling. Q sees this and takes even more pity on Spider, his heart breaking for him when he sees what the RDA has done to him.

After a while in the forest, Spider's daemon starts to relax and bond with the thanator, especially since the thanator protects and looks out for it against the Pandoran wildlife.

At night, spider and his tiger curl up together and Q watches them in the firelight thinking all of his deep, wishful, fatherly thoughts, while his thanator is looking at him pointedly as if to say 'why are you jealous of them, I'm right here'

Nevertheless, the thanator looks out for Spider and the tiger

Spider riding Q's thanator eventually

Spider and Quaritch watching their daemons playfully interact and Spider being totally embarrassed while Quaritch is sitting there smugly watching his daemon lick Spider's to clean its fur

If anyone has more please share!! I need to brush up my knowledge of the golden compass lore, but I tried!

[young-royals-confessions]

funnily enough, season 3 changed how i view and write the royal family. and i mean every single member lmao

erik was not as perfect or as kind as a lot of us hoped for as and wille believed. he could be cruel and was likely just as unhappy as wille was as crown prince. he was just more willing and skilled at hiding it. this kind of creates an interesting view into how their sibling dynamic was so different from their actual selves. or at least it was for erik. in my mind, erik grew up knowing he was going to take over the throne and therefore felt like he kind of had to split himself off into different personas-showing a different part of who he really was to certain people so that everyone could stay in his corner (like a good king would i guess). so much so that no one, not even his parents or wille or august, can ever get a true grasp on who erik was.

wille didn’t grow up like that. he grew up very similarly, but he didn’t have the expectation of ruling an entire country. he was more of a “what if” and “just to be safe” option. he was an afterthought, and rather than split his personality into different pieces of himself, he instead became more of a recluse who yearns for love but never receives it in the way he needs. so he is only ever fully himself when he’s around people who can reciprocate his yearning for kindness and care. the people who he feels safe with. erik was that for him even though erik, unbeknownst to him, wasn’t who he really thought. and simon eventually became that safety net as well. but by that time he had become crown prince. and to be the crown prince, he was gonna have to adapt like erik had. and wille was never good at pretending for the sake of others, so the crown prince persona ended up intruding onto the real wille until simon could no longer recognize him.

kristina is neglectful and ludvig is a silent passenger in it all. these are things i already knew but i feel like season 3 gave me so much more to work with in terms of their family dynamic. wille loves them both and was going crazy with guilt at the thought of kristina’s mental health deteriorating because of him. wille blames himself a lot, which makes me believe that the two of them had no problem doing that before. blaming wille for scandals or tiny mistakes he made. so much so that wille ended up convincing himself that everything that goes wrong is somehow his fault. just bad bad parents. do i think they love wille? yea im sure they do, but the crown clearly comes first for them and wille honestly deserves so much better. he deserves to be loved in a way that is reciprocal and not based on condition. kristina loved erik so much because erik wasn’t just her firstborn but was also the perfect crown prince. he listened and followed order and played puppet. wille was obviously much more difficult, and since she couldn’t show her love for him by praising his behavior, she just didn’t show him it

[communistkenobi]

i don’t know if you have seen the TOS movies so i will try to be as vague about this as possible so to not spoil them for you. i think a large portion (or at least a portion) of the issues presented in TOS are because starfleet sucks, to put it in the best words. this is not including the issues and harm it has done on real people, im talking about the in-universe starfleet and how it presents itself and its rules (example: colonization (encouraging its captains to colonize, encouraging its captains to make other planets and civilizations join their “american” federation)). a larger and more prominent explanation is how its, as described in VI, a “homosapiens-only club”. the klingon who says this also goes on to say that the federation is racist. and this is shown after both kirk and spock say they believe that the federation is peaceful. and obviously they think that because that’s what it presents itself as to it’s employees. another example is in TSFS when a higher authority from the federation tells kirk that he doesn’t believe in vulcan rituals, therefore, if kirk does this ritual, he will be fired. i know this is shown in the show as well but the more obvious examples are from the movies; to me it feels like they’re outright saying it in the films

i know this is not how it was intended to be perceived but this is what the show presents it as. i could be missing something or misunderstanding but this is how i see it, and from what i’ve heard, this is talked about in ds9

also starfleet coincidentally decides that the dark skinned aliens are enemies (this is more of a writing choice and the writers (and character designers) are at fault for this but it presents itself as an obvious issue, in universe, in V & VI)

I’ve seen the first four movies! My recall on canon and the intricacies of starfleet etc are not so precise, so I appreciate the context and some of that sounds familiar. I’m assuming you’re responding to my bitching about the politics of tos and how disconnected it is (in my view) with the fandom’s perception of tos as a progressive cultural text. 

I think those examples are good highlights of a lot of the in-universe problems with Starfleet. To go a step further, I think even absent Starfleet’s racist or discriminatory history in-universe, the show itself (at least tos, I haven’t seen the others) operates on a colonial imaginary, by which I mean, its basic narrative premises and assumptions are colonial (and therefore racist) in character.

Like okay, the premise of tos is that the Enterprise, as an ambassador of Starfleet/the Federation, is seeking out new alien life to study. The Prime Directive prohibits the Enterprise crew from interfering with the development of any alien culture or people while they do this, so the research they collect needs to be done in an unobtrusive way. I think this is the first point at which people balk at the charge that tos is colonial - the Enterprise’s mission is premised on non-interference, and I think when people hear ‘colonial’ as a descriptor they (understandably, obviously) assume it is describing active conquest, genocide, and dispossession. Even setting aside all the times where Kirk does directly interfere with the “development” of a people or culture (usually because they’ve “stagnated” culturally, because a culture without conflict cannot evolve or “develop” beyond its current presumed capacity - he is pretty explicitly imposing his own values onto another culture in order to force them to change in a particular way), or the times when the Enterprise is actually looking to extract resources from a given planet or people, I’m not exactly making this claim, or rather, that’s not the only thing I’m describing when calling tos colonial.

Its presentation of scientific discovery and inquiry is anthropological - the “object” of analysis is alien/foreign culture, meaning that when the Enterprise crew comes into contact with a new being or person, this person is always read first and foremost through the level of (the Enterprise’s understanding of) culture. Their behaviour, beliefs, dress, way of speaking, appearance, and so on are always reflective of (and represent a microcosm of) their culture as a whole, and more importantly, that their racial or phenotypic characteristics define the boundaries of their culture, ie, culture is interpreted, navigated, and bound racially. Because of this, Kirk and Co are never really interacting with individuals, they are interacting with components of a (foreign, exotic, fundamentally different) culture. And when they interact with these cultures, they very frequently measure them using a universalized scale of development - they have an evolutionary view of culture, ie, that all cultures go from savage to rational, primitive to advanced, economically marginal to economically dominant (ie, to capitalism). And the metrics they are judging these cultures by are fundamentally Western ones, always emphasising to the audience that the final destination of all cultures (that are worthy of advancing beyond their current limited/“primitive” stages) is a culture identical to the Federation, a culture that can itself engage in this anthropological mission to catalogue all life as fitting within a universal set of practices and racial similarities they call “culture.”

This is a western, colonial understanding of culture - racially and spatially homogenous people comprise the organs of a social totality, ie, a society, which can then be analysed as an “object,” as a “phenomenon,” by the scientists in order to extract information from them to produce and advance state (ie Federation) knowledge. The Enterprise crew are allowed to be individuals, are allowed to be subjects with a capacity for reason, contradiction, emotion, compassion, and even moments of savagery or violence, without those things being assigned to their “race” or “culture” as a whole, but the people they interact with are only components of a whole which are “discovered” by the Enterprise as opportunities to expand and refine the Federation’s body of knowledge.

And on the flip side you have the Klingons, which you brought up - a “race” that is uniformly savage, backward, violent, and dangerous. In the episode Day of the Dove, where Klingons board the Enterprise along with an alien cloud that makes everyone very aggressive and racist (this show is insane lol), the Enterprise crew begins acting violent and racist, but the Klingons don’t change. They aren’t more violent than before (because they already were fundamentally violent and racist), and they don’t become less violent when the cloud eventually leaves (because they are never able to emerge from their violence and savagery as a social condition or external imposition - they simply are that way). Klingons are racially, behaviourally, psychologically, and culturally homogenous, universally violent and immune to reason, and their racial characteristics are both physical manifestations of this universal violence as well as the origin of it. The writers and creators of tos are consciously invoking the orientalist idea of the “Mongolian horde,” representing both the American fear of Soviet global takeover as well as blatantly racist fears about “asiatics” (a word used in the show, particularly in The Omega Glory where a fear of racialised communist takeover is made explicit) dominating the world.

This is colonial thinking! Like, fundamentally, at its core, this is colonial white supremacist thinking. Now this is not the fault of tos as an individual show, this is a problem with western science in general, and I am not expecting a television show to navigate its way outside of this current colonial paradigm of scientific knowledge. I’m also not expecting an average person watching this to pick out all the intricacies of this and link it to the colonial history of Europe or the colonial history of western science. But this base premise of Star Trek is why the show is fundamentally colonial - even if the crew never intervened in any alien conflict, never extracted any material resources from other people, and even if the Federation did not have all these explicitly racist practices that you outlined, this would still be colonial logic and colonial thinking. The show has a fundamentally colonial imagination when it comes to exploration, discovery, and culture.

And so my problem, which is maybe where I need to adjust expectations for tumblr fandom, is when people call this show socialist or durably progressive in any way. This is not because socialist societies can’t be colonial or can’t be racist, obviously they can be those things, but because people are bundling “post-racist, post-bigotry, post-discrimination” in their labelling of tos as “socialist media.” When I hear someone call a piece of media socialist I am also bringing my own assumptions into those things, ie, I am expecting this claim to be actually reflective of the politics within the show to some degree. There can of course be debates about the exact nature and quality of those socialistic politics (see conversations about the politics of Disco Elysium, a contemporary canonical example of actual “socialist art”), but I’m at least expecting there to by a whiff of them in there! And I don’t think tos stands up to basic scrutiny in this regard. I genuinely do not even buy that it’s progressive, for reasons I’ve outlined above. Again that’s a genre problem, I think all sci-fi has to contend with this, but tos is certainly not a progressive exception to the political norms of sci-fi as a genre. 

And THIS IS OBVIOUSLY not me saying you can’t like tos or that you’re racist for doing so, I deeply enjoy the show on its own terms, and its politics (good and bad) are part of that enjoyment. I’m also someone who is in university & complicit in all of these colonial scientific assumptions and practices, I’m not positioning myself as morally superior in this discussion. But when people package their enjoyment of the show with their analysis of it as socialist, as progressive, I think that is pretty fucking stupid and leads to a lot of handwaving of its fundamentally racist narrative premises. Hence my bitching 

[celestie0]

a note on asking for updates

hellooo im sorry to have to make this post but i’ve been getting quite a few asks recently that have been asking me to update for kickoff and i just want to share that i don’t really enjoy receiving those sorts of asks :””) it is a part of my blog’s rules to not ask for updates, and it’s also stated that i don’t have any update schedule for my fics, but i will try to make this a bit more clear in the following:

please do not ask me when i will be uploading chapters, i’ve got no clue

please do not ask me if i’m done with chapters or for my progress on them

please do not tell me or demand me to update (yes even saying ‘please’ still feels like a demand for updates to me)

i’ve talked about this briefly on my blog before, but receiving these sorts of asks is upsetting for me n tend to make me anxious about my writing process. it takes me hours of my own personal time to write chapters, but it feels very shallow n disheartening to receive asks such as “update pls bc i can’t wait”…

my simple answer to any of those asks is

i’ve got no clue when i will update! i try not to give estimates bc deadlines or trying to stick to a schedule will only give me writer’s block n anxiety. the only time i’ll give a direct estimate is when i’ve officially queued a chapter. while i’d be flattered to hear you’re looking forward to updates, i don’t find it kind when ppl pressure me for them.

now if you’re wondering “i don’t think i’ve seen other authors have an issue with this tho 🤔” i really can’t explain why i feel pressured by these sorts of asks, but it’s just how i feel and so therefore it’s valid.

anyways, thank you for your continued patience!! i love interacting w everyone sm and the asks ive been recieving lately have been so lovely n motivational n some have brought me to legit tears i love u guys lots :”) just wanted to bring this specific rule up again because i know i’ve gotten new readers recently, and this rule is really important to me for my blog. thank you!!

[boopshoops]

Yay yay tcoav qna!!!! I still have one more chapter left to read, but I’m super curious about the magic aspect of Yuu Shi’s homeland!! So far we know it’s been banned for like a longggg time, but magic deffo exists. How did it get banned? And regarding that, what does NRC in Yuu Shi’s universe even teach since it’s probs not a prestigious magic school?? I kinda just want to know the similarities and differences between twisted wonderland and Yuu Shi’s world

Also, I didn’t leave any comments on ao3, but ur writing style’s wonderful!! the pov switching is really smooth and not confusing to me at all, and i love how you characterized the staff members given the super limited information about them in game (in contrast to the students’, at least). Can’t wait to see and read more of it and how it differs from the game!! It’s so good so far!!!!

HELLO KRIS!!! kfndjsgjdndk 😭🥺💕💕 im SO glad you're enjoying the fic thus far. I've put a ton of research into the teachers and students alike in order to feel more confident writing them- it was my first time writing characters that i didn't make myself!!!!

As far as Dusk Summit goes, I DO eventually plan on making a post explaining it a bit more... but thats a long ways out as I'd have go learn how tf to draw maps KFNFNDN so there will eventually be a lore and aesthetic dump FJDNDJFJ

Magic in Dusk Summit is a rather tricky subject, some people partially agree that the land claims it as "dangerous," while others think its some weird form at garnering control over the citizens. It is a very... strict place, so to speak.

The main reason that magic has been banned has actually been long forgotten, both by the people themselves and the ones who rule. (Ofc i know the reason but thats entering big spoiler territory ehehe >:))) Therefore, it was simply watered down to "magic=danger!!!" Over time.

Even then they are not particularly wrong- given that in Yuu Shi's world, the outside lands still DO practice magic. She just doesn't know jack shit about it due to being raised inside the Dusk Summit. It's because that magic is still practiced in other countries that the rulers are able to handpick tragedies and push the 'magic?!?! bad!!!' propaganda.

The main differences between the two worlds of Twisted Wonderland is that basically, if you look on a globe, her homeland has poofed out of existence. Everything else is still there.

As for why that seems to be one of the only differences, i'll expand on that in later chapters mwahahaha- everything isnt as it seems, ofc!!

QnA is still open ofc! Come at me yall-

Also old doodle bonus weeee

Tag list 💛

@thehollowwriter @distant-velleity @lowcallyfruity @cecilebutcher @skriblee-ksk

@kitwasnothere @justm3di0cr3

[exololyunho]

vault 33

***spoiler warning for ep. 1 of the Fallout tv show***

masterlist

struggling to find a husband in your vault, you submit yourself for the triennial trade, hoping to find a husband from your neighboring vault. you do, but he's not all he seems to be

wc: 2.1k

warnings: violence and death, fingering, vaginal sex, oral sex, clothed sex, unprotected sex, multiple rounds, multiple orgasms, san tries to kill the reader, reader kills san, angst, it gets pretty violent at the end

an: hello I'm back! kind of. its been quite a year and im considering this my redebut lol. this isn't my best work but I'm decently proud of it and I hope you enjoy!

taglist: @staytinyinmybpack @jeonride @becky4733107-blog @ignoretheskies

“My name is Y/n L/n,” your smile is nervous as the three council members before you stare impassively back. “I enjoy teaching ancient history and English. I participate regularly in intermediate phys ed, I do decently well in fencing, and I’ve been known to score moderately highly in riflery.”

Clearing your throat, you spared a glance at the motivational poster of Vault Boy behind the council. Do your best!

“In my free time, I like to garden, write short stories, and read any book I can get my hands on. I received a thorough check from our doctor, and I am proud to announce my reproductive organs are in excellent shape! Even so, I have not been able to find a suitable partner within our vault. Therefore, I submit myself as a candidate for intervault marriage in the upcoming triennial trade!.”

Your heart was beating rapidly as all three of the council members nodded, before lifting their wrists to tap at their pipboys. Within seconds, your own was dinging. You couldn’t believe your eyes as the message “Congratulations!” flashed across your own pipboy.

One week later and here you were, dressed in the standard white dress every woman in your vault had been married in. It was knee length with a flowy skirt that swished whenever you walked. With your name signed on the lining and the veil attached to your perfectly styled hair, you were off to the intervault door.

With your father, the overseer, at your side, you waited with the rest of Vault 33, eagerly anticipating the first glimpse in three years of your neighbor Vault 32. As the gatekeeper pushed the button, the big door labeled 32 moved towards you, then rolled to the side to reveal the people hidden behind.

They were… not what you had expected. In your own vault, everyone and everything was pristine, the example of a shining gem of a society. The people of Vault 32 were far from that. Their standard issue jumpsuits were worn and slightly faded. The people themselves weren’t necessarily dirty, but their hair was messy, their skin blotched and weathered, and their appearance all around unorthodox. Some of them had tattoos, even on the limited skin showing at their hands and necks. A few even had visible scars that looked like knife wounds, something that shouldn’t be possible in a vault.

But no matter. These people had been through hardship, losing their overseer and having a poor harvest this year. You did your best to keep the smile on your face as their overseer stepped forward to greet your father. The two made small talk, but you were not listening. All you could focus on was scanning the faces of the people before you, trying to figure out which one would be your new husband. There were lots of them, so it was hard to make out the faces of the people in the back. Everyone in the front seemed to be either too old or female so that ruled them out.

Finally, you grew tired of speculating. “Sooo, who am I marrying?”

The overseer of vault 32 smiled at you before gesturing at her people. “This is San.”

From the back of the crowd, a man walked forward. Unlike many of the other vault 32 dwellers, he had no visible scars. His head hung low, but other than that he looked like he belonged in your vault. He was handsome, with a chiseled face, a strong frame, and a full head of thick black hair.

One of the women behind you whistled under her breath. 

“Let’s get this show on the road!” Your dad exclaimed, and everyone began to move.

In the hall, you and San traded vows. They were standard really, nothing too exciting since you didn’t know each other. But that first kiss… that first kiss was great. It was relatively chaste but the feel of his plush lips against yours and the intensity in his eyes before and after left you heated and ready for your first night together.

San didn’t speak much after that. Instead he focused on the food provided, devouring almost everything on his plate quickly, as if he hadn’t eaten in weeks. Even as he was stuffing his face, you couldn’t help but admire his features. His dimples added to his charm and the way his hair fell into his eyes made him look younger. His youthful but handsome appearance was doing things to you, lighting a fire deep inside.

“So, San,” you began, “what is your sperm count?”

San choked a bit on the bite of food he had just swallowed. Coughing a few times, he eventually croaked out,  “Um, high.”

“Ah good, my reproductive organs are in great shape so we should have a fruitful marriage!” your smile was wide, although your happiness was dashed slightly by the noncommittal “yeah” San gave. Focus on the positive, Y/n.

A few hours had passed and by this point you were mingling, talking to some of your friends and nibbling on jello cake, when a hand met your waist. Looking up, your eyes met San’s.

“Show me to my new home?” He had a sly smile on his face.

A light flush reached your cheeks as you nodded at him with a wide smile. With that, the two of you were off. Cheers followed you as you led him down the winding hallways to your very own unit. Pressing the button, the large door rose to reveal the one room unit you’d be sharing for the foreseeable future.

“This is us!” you led the way inside, eager to show him all the amenities available to you both as he shut the door behind you. “We’ve got every kitchen appliance you could think of, a full shower, they even got us a little welcome home basket!” 

You turned back to face him but your happy smile quickly turned to shock at seeing him standing there, completely naked with a hand stroking his impressive dick. His face had that sly smile back on it.

Regaining your composure, you smiled again. “Okey dokey!”

With that you moved towards him, connecting your lips as your hands roamed his body. San’s tongue invaded your mouth as your hands traced his abs. Gosh, he was so hot it was making your knees weak. His hands reached around to grab your ass as he spun you so your back was against the wall. 

One of your hands found his hair, tugging on the stands as his lips traveled to your neck, nipping and sucking on your pulse point, forcing a sigh from your lips as your eyes closed to enjoy the sensation. 

All too soon, he stepped away from you, his hooded eyes meeting yours. “I want to fuck you on the table.”

A grin crept onto your face as you removed your undergarments. “Then lie down big boy.”

San’s devastatingly handsome smirk matched yours as he laid back on the table, lazily stroking his dick and watching you walk towards him, still wearing your veil and wedding dress. With ease, you climbed onto the table, straddling his waist. 

Sinking down, you let out a sigh that matched his groan as you took him all the way in. Gosh, this felt good. He filled you in the best way, reaching deep inside you and brushing past that spongy spot that made your mind blank. 

You only allowed yourself a few seconds to enjoy being full before beginning to move. Rolling your hips up and down as your fingers left scratches on his chest. His hands came to your waist to help you move even faster on top of him. The pace was incredible, easily the best sex you’d ever had. 

San’s hips started pumping up into you on every downstroke you made, causing your eyes to flutter shut as you gasped out a moan. His hands disappeared from your waist, sneaking under your skirt where one grasped your thigh and the other made contact with your clit.

You doubled over as his fingers started working you in tight circles. Letting out gasping cries of his name, your rhythm faltered and he took over.

Holding you to him, San stood up off the table before laying you out on it, your hips positioned at the edge. He started thrusting with a vengeance as his fingers still circled your clit at a wondrous pace. Your back arched off the table as your moans increased in volume while your orgasm crept up on you.

“San- I-” your mouth dropped open when he switched the angle of his thrusts to perfectly hit your g-spot. He noticed your reaction and kept that angle, jerking gasps and whines out of you with every thrust in. You were so close, teetering on the edge of what was surely about to be the best orgasm you had ever experienced.

“Cum for me, Y/n. Come on be a good girl,” San’s crude words and the increase of pressure on your clit from his fingers pushed you past the breaking point. 

Your body locked up, interior muscles spasming around him as he groaned and gave a few more jerky thrusts before spilling inside you. Meanwhile, colors were exploding behind your eyes as you rode out the waves of pleasure that were overtaking your conscious mind.

Panting, both of you stayed connected as you came down. With your eyes closed, you rested, relishing the fading high and the boneless feeling of good sex. Until San was pulling you up from the table.

“Wha-” you could barely get a word out as he spun you around, pulling down the zipper of your dress, leaving you standing there naked as it fell to your feet. 

“San-” again you tried to ask what he was doing but he was pulling you to the bed and tossing you into the middle before crawling in after you. His hands quickly found your thighs, forcing them apart as his face descended between them. You let out a strangled gasp as his tongue made contact with your clit and two of his fingers made their way inside you. 

Your hands gripped the sheets below you as his tongue traced circles around you, relighting the fire in your stomach.

“God, fuck,” one of your hands jumped to grip his hair as he introduced a third finger inside you. San was moving fast, and his ministrations were quickly bringing you to your second orgasm of the night. With a stuttered cry, you came again, your hand clenching in his hair as he worked you through it. 

Closing your eyes and relaxing as you came down, San flopped next to you. The two of you laid in silence. You allowed yourself to close your eyes, breathing deeply and anticipating the exciting new way your life was going to change for the better.

Your eyes were drawn open by San standing. He stared at the fake balcony for a moment, before wiping his dick clean on the curtains. Your mouth dropped open in shock as you watched him. He pulled on his boxers before heading to the sink and filling a flower vase with water. He chugged the whole thing. You watched him cautiously, quietly climbing out of bed to grab your pipboy and flipping to the radiation detector. It clicked furiously as you pointed it at San. He was still chugging water.

“You’re from the surface,” you whispered. San froze before he turned to look at you. There was a beat of silence between you before he was lunging at you. You ran trying to open the door but he grabbed you, throwing you down, causing you to slide along the linoleum floor, slamming into the kitchen cabinets. As you caught your breath, you looked up at him, only to find him now holding a long, curved blade he must have hidden in his jumpsuit. 

“Sorry, babe,” he approached you, “this has still been the best day of my life.”

You scrambled to your feet, looking for a weapon, but it was no use. He was on you, plunging the knife into your side and lifting you up so you sat on the kitchen counter, gasping for breath. 

You hands were desperately searching for anything to protect yourself as he leaned in to kiss your neck one last time. Luckily, your hands made contact with the vase he was previously drinking out of. You snatched it up, swinging it and breaking it over his head as he gasped out in pain.

With one final swipe, you drug the shattered edge across his throat, causing him to sputter as he took staggering steps away from you, before he collapsed on the floor.

With shaking hands, you pulled the knife from your side as you took deep breaths. 

“Raiders.”

[magioffire]

saw your reply on that one ask post and while i still can't find the account in question to block, thank you for the extra clues on what to look out for!

alright im gonna be real its the blog char/lotte-l/iddel. i commonly do not name drop blogs and was 100 percent prepared to leave this shit behind but....i guess she just keeps wanting to drag everyone back in because every day, its something else. therefore i think its important people know exactly who tf she is so they dont have to walk on eggshells wondering if theres someone in their community that literally holds wrong and bigoted opinions against them for....simply existing? nah. no one should have to deal with that.

theyve deleted many of their anti-polyam posts to cover their tracks and avoid criticism. but their issues with polyam apparently include: wars have been started as a direct result of polyam relationships apparently (???? girl what. what wars), confusing polyam with forced religious polygamy (and seems to also conveniently forget that people still to this day are forced into monogamous relationships somehow), that only people who are childish, deluded or narcissistic are in polyam relationships, used right-wing talking heads like jor/dan p/eterson, m/att wa/lsh and j/oe ro/gan as 'sources' (as a trans person, even if you do not agree with everything these people say, if you uncritically consume them, i just dont feel safe around you. period.). and yet despite having these opinions she still thought it was okay to be in mutuals with openly polyamorous characters and muns, and follow the blogs of people who had it explicit in their rules that they dont tolerate ANY forms of bigotry or hatred. like, you gotta follow HER rules and respect HER boundaries but apparently everyone else's space and boundaries? free reign for her. she can reap the benefit of consuming our art and writing and being in our spaces while also having such vile opinions, apparently. now shes claiming its just an opinion of her muse, but we all know its just a smoke screen. we arent stupid, we can tell when someone is soapboxing using their character as a shield against criticism. and frankly, its repulsive. in this situation, you can either own up to your mistake, or double down on your bigoted stance and make it abundantly clear that you do not welcome certain groups of people into your space. thats fair. but shes being wishwashy, like many bigots nowadays are. they cannot own up to their biogtry and need a level of plausible deniability to avoid criticism, which...ultimately just means all of us have to walk on egg shells to 'tolerate' their shitty opinions because they 'claim' they arent *actually* hateful, they are just *concerned* or *uncomfortable*. like --

i could go on. but really i think you get it. im really sorry that you, and all of us, who are in this community to find respite from this kind of hate and intolerance, and enjoy eachother's differences, have to deal with this. i am friends with people from all walks of life, many world views, *i always give everyone the benefit of the doubt* but when i witness such blatant misinformation, pettiness and hatred being harbored within the community, i cant keep quiet about it or tolerate it.

ignore the shit out of her. she wants attention. dont give her anymore.

[twistedastrology]

Outer Planets & Affliction: What destroys a man.

----------------------------------------------------------

gonna talk abt a much darker topic today bc i feel like it and it's absolutely fascinating to me from a very morbid perspective (which happens a lot 4 me)

im gonna start this off by saying this is mostly focusing on extreme cases/what Could happen due to outer planet affliction, none of this is definite if u have afflicted outer planets bc it depends on the severity of their affliction and how many good counter aspects u have to them that help u heal!! :)

to start, the outer planets to me are Saturn to Pluto, so let me give u a quick rundown of what I think these planets are responsible for when they're heavily afflicted:

Saturn - Destruction of the will, the snuffing of one's inner, driving fire.

Uranus - Destruction of the mind, losing your cognitive function, going insane.

Neptune - Destruction of the spirit, loss or lack of intuition, feeling lost within your own life.

Pluto - Destruction of the body, the vessel decays and lacks the strength to repair itself.

i wanna say as well that all of this essentially came to me in a vision from god, i genuinely had no basis in my head initially, i was just rambling to myself in my head and all of this clicked and then it genuinely made sense and i even had evidence to back it up, so i wanted to post abt it because i love dark stuff like this (my blog name isn't twisted astrology for no reason- i mean like the reason was bc it was a play on twist and twisted transistor by korn But yknow it gains reasons as i go on-)

let's go over why each planet destroys what they do:

Saturn destroys the will because it rules over time and persistance- Capricorns are more often than not very driven people, Saturn grounds them and gives them the stability and willpower to see things through. A strong Saturn is often manifested as a very powerful driving force, as the planet often acts an incredibly crucial pillar, if not the foundation in a person's chart.

Uranus destroys the mind because it's the higher octave of Mercury. It rules over innovation and change, even higher thought. A strong Uranus is often an indicator of a genius in whatever area of life the planet is placed into. Thus, when afflicted, it completely shatters and even lacks this potential altogether.

Neptune destroys the spirit because it's known as the planet of spirituality. It's the planet of our higher self and our shadow self, it's our connection to the planes of existence beyond our own. A strong Neptune is often indicative of enhanced intuition, and can even mean the person has a heightened level of awareness of their place in the world and where they're meant to be in life. So naturally, an afflicted Neptune means a complete lack of perspective and the loss/lack of the ability to realize there is more than the self, making one feel lonely, inadequate, and lost.

Pluto destroys the body because it rules over death, transformation and rebirth. It even rules over destruction itself, and its connection to death gives it an inherent connection to the physical body as well. A strong Pluto can manifest as a strong will, but also as a higher pain tolerance because of that. Therefore when it's afflicted, the soul's vessel lacks the ability to transform and regenerate itself effectively, and ultimately will crumble to pieces throughout the course of life.

OK- lemme write normally now instead of all fancy n shit 😮‍💨 But what's my evidence to prove all this-

well someone i know has very heavily afflicted outer planets, mainly saturn, uranus and pluto, but neptune was kinda roped into the affliction as well- and all of this checks out.

saturn especially hits him hard, which also makes it all karmic so idk wtf bro did in a past life but it had to've been Bad bc he's got some SERIOUSLY afflicted outer planets like jesus fucking christ- and like i dont wanna talk too much shit on here but he's insufferable to say the least and, probably bc of the afflicted saturn, will not do the work to fix it.

would genuinely hate to be him on his death bed like 🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡

ANYWAY-

like i said initially tho this does not mean if u have a kinda afflicted uranus, ur gonna go insane!!! no sir!!! it's just abt the extremes n stuff and what i have literally seen happen with my own eyes- i think most people have enough soft aspects to get them into the process of healing, maybe not even soft aspects maybe just solid placements- it's all subjective, rly-

but this is also a really good way to talk abt the Power that these planets have- they are NOT to be fucked with bc when afflicted, they can obliterate you and your entire life tbh- i dont think they Want to unless you somehow have beef with them but overall they are just incredibly powerful planets and i truly think when reading someone's astrology chart, you GOTTA look at the outer planets bc otherwise you're missing out on SOOOOO much crucial information.

i always say that i think outer planets, whether in transit or in a natal chart, have the absolute MOST impact on a person despite being so far away.

far away ≠ lack of impact.

i hope this was interesting to read or at least thought provoking bc i absolutely LOVE dark topics like these, probably my moon/neptune in my 8th house tbh- i mean im genuinely fucking petrified of tornadoes like lilapsophobia type shit but i still put that image here because i unfortunately think they are really fucking cool at the same time (ive had multiple nightmares where tornadoes have killed me. but like........ they're kinda cool......and i hate them........)

anyway!!!!! thank u for reading this far into my yapping session 🙏🙏

[aropride]

psychology rant of th day. we're reading about attachment styles in my psych class and idk i kind of feel like it's bullshit. like. i know i cant just point at things and go "BULLSHIT" but it just feels like. way too simplistic.

not to deny how childhood relationship with caregivers influences adulthood obviously, just. i think its kindof silly to be like "ok theres 4 ways u can act in a relationship. the Good way the Scared way the Avoidant way and the Abused Child way." and it makes classes really awkward cuz its like Ok everyone write a discussion board post about your attachment style! like um. ok. yeah man i have the Abused As A Child attachment style 👍

and i also have a friend who's fearful-avoidant and was Not abused or neglected as a child. dont say "the exception proves the rule" i dont understand that phrase and never will. I just think its very strange way of categorizing people

AND ALSO like. the assumption seems to be that as a general rule peoples "attachment styles" are 1) the same across situations/types of relationships and 2) arent influenced by, like, things that happen after 18months. like it says they Can be changed by later relationships but barely even goes into it. like no i think the like . MANY instances of interpersonal violence and abuse have shaped the way i interact with others even if i was 16 and not a baby when they happened. yknow

im not done thinking abt it yet obvi im not even done reading the chapter. but this Feels Like Bullshit to me. also i googled "is this bullshit" and the answers were like No. Psychologists Have Identified Four Types Of People. and im not invested enough to read thru studies but like. how did they identify these Types. are they accounting for people who dont fit any of the types. what are the speculations on non-abused children with a fearful-avoidant type. are they using this framework to do research therefore validating the framework by using it in research about it etc etc like a snake eating its own tail. how does this vary culturally. if none of them are "good" or "bad" whyare they called Secure vs Fearful/Avoidant. etc

edit to add- the language/words used for each style are aallllll over the place too. why isnt there set names for these

[sketch-guardian]

Never again trying to request or ask something on another tumblr account that isn’t this one 😞

I was looking at this one account and this character was honestly so cool and I was like “woah, I want him to be my dad” so I like asked if they did child reader stuff but then I looked at their request rules one more time. THEY DIDNT DO UNDERAGE STUFF, IM SO EMBARRASSED. I SEJT ANOTHER ASK FRANTICALLY APOLOGISING AND I DONT THINK I CAN LIVE IT DOWN.

BUT YEAH THIS ACCOUNT MAKES ME FEEL VERY SAFE WITH THE REQUESTS, YOURE VERY NICE!!

WHEN YOURE NOT BUSY IS IT OKAY IF I ASK FOR ALL THE RAD CLASSMATES WHOS NOT FULLY HUMAN (YOU CAN CHOOSE WHAT THE OTHER HALF IS BUT IF MC WAS HALF ANGEL IT WOULD GO CRAZYYY FOR REMIEL. I FEEL LIKE THEYD FEEL SO SAFE, THEY DESERVE IT. REMIEL NEEDS MORE LOVE)

sorry for caps lock btw!! It’s very fun 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

You know, at first since Tumblr notifications only show me the start of asks, I read "never again trying to request-" and I was already thinking the worst😳like oh god, what did I do to mess up so badly?🙈Then I read the rest and breathed a sigh of relief🤣Anyway, I'm sure you'll be able to get through such moment eventually!✨Those are small oversights that can happen and I doubt the author of that account will take it out on you for so little, trust me☺I've made a fool of myself before several times, I'm very awkward both online and in reality, but over time I learned to laugh about such mishaps😂Still, I'm happy you feel comfortable sending asks here💕you flatter me and thank you again for your kindness💜I'm sorry if I'm taking a day or two to reply to asks🙈but I'm still trying to finish the New exchange students' true celestial forms sketch, I apologize for being slow😭I promise I'll reply though😥since I just need to start shading the drawing🤞🏻Now, to vary the headcanons a bit, I chose a different race for each OC, inserting half-angel MC for Remiel as you requested😌(I'm glad you like Remiel by the way and don't worry about your writing✨). Also considering you mentioned child reader stuff earlier, I assumed you meant platonic headcanons with child MC, I hope I didn't misinterpret🙈:

"RAD CLASSMATES+NEW EXCHANGE STUDENTS WITH A HALF-BREED CHILD MC"

DEMYA (HALF-ORC)

Demya would be curious at the sight of half-orc child MC, having never seen an orc in her entire life, however she would feel admiration towards their race as they are prone to fighting, they would remind her in a certain sense of her own race (fauxsaeva) and she would like to discover more curiosities through half-orc child MC. Demya would coo over half-orc child MC's tusks, finding them adorable and would compare them with her thicker and pointer fangs, perfect for tearing meat, she would also be curious to see how half-orc child MC eats, so Demya would often share her snacks with them, only treats though, because her main and perhaps sometimes bloody meals could be too much for half-orc child MC. Furthermore, Demya would love to play fight with half-orc child MC, as they are quite powerful and resistant for their age, that way she wouldn't necessarily have to worry about risking harming them accidentally

DOMNRA/MOBIM (CAMBION)

Domnra wouldn't be too surprised by a cambion child MC, it's not that rare for a demon and a human to fall in love, hell he's seen it happen several times, both in Devildom and on Earth despite himself, so it would be logical to finally see, at least once, a demon half-breed appear. Domnra would feel some kind of connection to cambion child MC, both for their demonic side, a trait they would have in common, and in a certain sense for their feeling in half, given that his soul was literally split in half and then shared by two beings, i.e. Domnra and Mobim, while child MC is half-human and half-demon. Therefore Domnra would defend cambion child MC if someone bothered them regarding their lineage and would help cambion child MC to get more in tune with their demonic side, in short to control it. Mobim would sense cambion child MC's nature, but honestly for the little curse child MC could be anything and it would accept them either way, because that's what true family is supposed to do. In the end Mobim and cambion child MC would become good friends/sibilings

AZUL (HALF-FAE)

Azul would be genuinely surprised at the sight of a half-fae child MC, with features and appearance similar to those of a nymph or a fairy, aware that it's a rather rare and difficult race to come across, therefore he would show enthusiasm at the sight of them and probably he would ask half-fae child MC some questions, especially to check if some of their powers are similar or not. Considering that half-fae child MC would probably be very attached to nature, Azul would take them to lie down in some flowery meadows, a habit of when Azul was still an angel, while his familiars, blue morpho butterflies, would flutter around them, as if they were in a classic Disney movie. Azul would also let half-fae child MC experiment with painting, making nice portraits of each other, after all he would find their fae traits inspiring. Azul would try to find out if half-fae child MC had the ability of imposing their will and controlling other people by obtaining their names, because no matter how convenient and fun it might sound, it would still be a problem if such thing happened, so Azul would use himself as an example of bad influence, meaning that half-fae child MC should't try to mimic the bullshit or pranks he pulls off (but in his heart, Azul would be proud-)

ZURI (HALF-SIREN)

Zuri would be intrigued from a biological point of view by half-siren child MC, wanting to understand how such a union could have happened, given the significantly different anatomy, however she would do research on her own rather than asking half-siren child MC personally, after all Zuri wouldn't know their family situation or conception, it could be a sensitive topic. Zuri would also note that half-siren child MC would be a sea variant siren and not an air one similar to an harpy. Zuri would make sure to get either a small pool or a large water case in which half-siren child MC could swim to their heart's content and stay hydrated, perhaps also adding decorationd such as algae, pearls, shells and corals, to make ambience more pleasant and aquarium like. Zuri would aid half-siren child MC in taking care of their skin by moisturizing their scattered fish scales and help them use their powers responsibly, such as their siren song ability, similar to Zuri's hypnosis

ODON (HALF-ELDRITCH)

Odon is an ancient eldritch abomination, so much so that they don't exactly remember the circumstances of their birth or creation, so they have experienced many events during the course of their long life, however Odon would have to admit that it would be the first time they have ever encountered a half-eldritch, especially so young, so it would be a new pleasant experience for Odon to meet half-eldritch child MC and possibly become friends. Odon would find interesting that a human would even consider having a child with a eldritch horror, since they aren't exactly known for their friendliness, helpfulness, or parenting skills, in general it's not recommended for humans to deal with such entities, so Odon would find delightful knowing that there are other eldritch beings tame enough to consider forming such unions, at least they hope. Half-eldritch child MC wouldn't have to fear showing their eldritch side to Odon, because it would have no effect on them, moreover Odon would be able to worry less about their own form being seen, because as a half-eldritch, if child MC were to see Odon's face under their bangs, perhaps they would just get nausea or a headache. Odon would be a good mentor for half-eldritch child MC, teaching them how to control their most abominable side, they would allow half-eldritch child MC to have a friend with whom they can be their true self, after all Odon knows what it means to be alone

REMIEL (HALF-ANGEL)

Remiel would be aware of how rare it is to find half-angels like herself, since the Celestial Council usually does not approve such sins of creation and depending on whether or not those half-breed children disturb balance, they are mostly simply repudiated or directly abandoned to die to their fate, therefore at the sight of half-angel child MC, Remiel would be a little surprised and at the same time she would feel a certain bond with them on a deeper level, a soft of kinship. At the beginning probably both half-angel child MC and Remiel would analyze each other in silence with a curious gaze, tilting their heads from side to side like a lost puppy, over time though, considering that half-angel child MC has most likely suffered discrimination due to their heritage as well, they would quickly grow attached to Remiel and take shelter under her much larger feathery wings. During her long existence, Remiel has become numb to certain things, such as mocks or taunts, believing them to be true from a logical point of view, however half-angel child MC's case would be different from her situation and the angel of death would like them to feel safe for once, because it would be what they deserve. Being somber yet blunt, Remiel would have no problem softly explaining to upset conservative angels that since balance allowed half-angel child MC to be born, they have the right to exist. Remiel would help half-angel child MC with cleansing and preening their wings, taking care of their feathers with tender and soothing touch, in the meantime half-angel child MC would help Remiel understanding emotions better, perhaps the angel of death could even teach them to fly if they wished to learn, holding half-angel child MC by the hand, to prevent them from falling, Remiel wouldn't let that happen

NATHANIEL (HALF-DRAGON)

Nathaniel would be aware that there are different races and that crossbreeding can occasionally occur, however he would be surprised and intrigued by the compatibility between a human and a dragon, which would apparently result in draconic bloodline and half-dragon child MC's birth. Nathaniel would find dragons fascinating creatures, thinking of them as wise, honorable and free, therefore he would show interest in half-dragon child MC's dragon traits, such as wings, tail or horns, taking care they do not get hurt during the day, since they could be cumbersome while moving around, Nathaniel would also apply some herbal creams to half-dragon child MC's skin in the areas where their scales begin, such as cheeks or arms, to avoid skin irritation or dryness. One of the times Nathaniel would actually be caught off guard would be if half-dragon child MC, depending on their powers, risked burning, electrifying, or freezing his face off during a sneeze, which would then surprisingly make Nathaniel laugh

URIEL (DEMIGOD)

Uriel at the beginning, as a warrior angel serving the Celestial Realm, would be skeptical in believing in other deities, given that god (Father) is the only entity who she has always served and praised together with other angels, therefore she might not immediately believe demigod child MC, she would need proof of them being the offspring of a deity and a human, but once obtained, Uriel would be astonished, because it would go against what she was taught to believe. Once she comes to terms with the half-divine nature of child MC, Uriel would like to test demigod child MC's skills, their resilience and would be quite amazed and proud of what they are capable of accomplish. Uriel would then teach demigod child MC that with great power comes great responsibility and that they should only use their powers to seek justice and fight for the innocent. Moreover Uriel wouldn't tell demigod child MC, but due to her strict education and discipline, she might find the relationship between human and deity sacrilegious, still Uriel would try to overcome her prejudices for demigod child MC's sake