#im being othered in a place i want to feel safe.

[carlosainzgf]

okay now im waiting for the player 246 bathroom scene🙂

bathroom

park gyeong seok x fem!reader (smut. i mean the title speaks for itself)

(kind of a part 2 of ‘a comforting presence’ but it can be read individually aswell)

the night crippled in, but unfortunately for you the slumber decided not to show you any signs of life. you jumped down from your bed and slowly walked towards the bathroom.

gyeong seok, who was sleeping on the bed next to yours heard you get up.

he held your wrist and said “where you going?”

“i need to use the bathroom.”

“i’ll come with you. it’s not safe to go alone.”

his hand moved from your wrist to your waist, keeping a soft grip on you.

after almost begging the guards to open the door you managed to convince them.

when you got to the bathrooms you moved to open the women’s room’s door but gyeong seok did it for you. you thought he was just being a gentleman and holding the door for you but no. he slipped inside after you, making sure the guards didn’t see.

“what are you doing?”

“i’ll wait for you here. i don’t want you to be alone.”

he was like this ever since the night of the fight. always kept an eye and his hands on you.

you walked over to the sink to wash your face when you saw the blood stains all over your shirt. anything about blood made you want to vomit at this point. so you took your shirt off to wash it. before you could open the tap you heard gyeong seok gasp. you looked over to him through the mirror. he was staring. i mean, how could he not? a gorgeous women like you stood shirtless infront of him. even tho you were still in a bra he was fascinated.

“see something you like?” you teased him but he didn’t respond. he just walked closer to you and wrapped his arms around you from behind. he started peppering kisses on your shoulder and at the back of your neck.

you turned to face him. he held your face in his hands and looked at you as if he was asking for permission. you gave him a small nod and that was all he needed.

his hands on either side of your head as his lips devoured yours in the gentlest way possible. your hands fisted in his shirt, pulling him close. it was like you needed him to breath.

“i need you.” he sounded desperate and he meant what he said. this place made you miss the feeling, the touch and the warmth of someone else. and you needed him as much as he needed you.

you groped him from his sweatpants. when he started getting impatient you slipped his sweatpants and boxers down and take him in your hand. he was already half hard, and it only grew as you close your hand around it. you admire its length, its width, and most of all, you feel the way it throbbed for you as it grew in your hand. once he was fully hardened, you sped up your pace, moaning as you pleased him— were you trying to kill him?

he admires you, your returned with a flushed face staring back at him lustfully. he leans down, kissing down your neck. his touch was so sweet, feather light. every kiss was gentle, as if you were delicate. he kissed down your body, stopping at your chest. his eyes meet yours again, once again asking for permission. when you nod he takes your bra off. he trails his tongue around your nipple and plants a peck on the top, before taking your breast into his mouth while playing with the other.

you were both panting and moaning messes even with subtle touches. he moved away from your breasts and moved his hand lower. he slipped his hand in your sweatpants and toyed with your clit over you underwear. you wrapped an arm around his neck to ground yourself, your legs doing little to nothing to support you up at this point.

you let go of his dick to take you bottoms off. he wasted no time and got down on his knees. he grabbed your leg and placed it on his shoulder and got to work. he licked, nipped, sucked, kissed and fucked you with his tongue till you fell apart.

you pulled him up with urgency, needy to feel him in you. you pulled him into another kiss. he once again kissed you gently as if you were a porcelain doll that could break any second. you could taste yourself on his tongue.

“gyeong seok…make love to me.”

he grunted at your words. he suddenly picked you up, your legs wrapping around his waist. he opened the door to one stools and sat on the toilet with you on his lap. you rubbed your heat on his throbbing and leaking tip. he tipped his head back, moaning. you found this as an opportunity to leave open mouthed kisses on his neck.

he couldn’t wait anymore. he needed to be inside you. he gripped his length and positioned it at your opening as you worked your magic on his neck. he bucked his hips up and you lowered your ass, meeting in the middle. you both moaned loudly at the new found sensation. you hand moved up to tug at the hairs at the back of his neck.

his mouth was slightly agape without even realizing it. his hands resting on your hips, guiding you. you just looked so pretty bouncing on top of him he couldn’t help but stare. he moved away the hairs that were stuck to your face. your face contorted with pleasure while his cock hit all the right spots in your plushy walls. your eyes stared into his while you bit your lip. your tits were bouncing all up in his face and he loved it. the feeling of your pussy clenching around his cock and tits in his face and the intimacy of it all had him feeling like he was in heaven.

once he noticed you were growing tired and your movements got sloppy he started thrusting his hips up. “you feel so, good." he said, almost whining. his breathing quickened and so did his pace. you whined loudly, throwing your head back as his pace quicken.

you moved your hand down to your throbbing clit. "oh that's what you want? need me to play with you?" he asked, then reached down, move your hand away and processed to rub your clit with his thumb. he put light pressure and rubbed your clit. your moans grew louder. he kissed you, muffling your moans.

you clenched around him, as your climax built up, indicating you were close. gyeong seok took notice of the situation, tilting his head back to take in your beauty as you tangled your digits through his locks. his teeth grazed over your nipples, planting soft kisses afterwards to soothe away any pain. 

“come for me, beautiful.” that was all you needed to hear. you came moaning his name and clenching around him, almost suffocating his dick.

he came with you. how your eyes closed, how your mouth hung open, how you dug your nails onto his shoulders, how you sucked him impossibly deeper. it was all too much for him to bear. he hugged you by your waist as he painted your squishy walls white with his cum.

you both sat there, in each others arms as you calmed down. he put your hair behind your ears and placed a sweet kiss on your lips.

“let me take you out on a date when we get out of here.”

you smiled and nodded. but your heart ached when he said ‘when we get out of here’. because there was no promise of tomorrow. but if you do get out alive, you would more than love to go on a date with him. but you could think about that later. right now you were too busy with the gorgeous man underneath you.

𓍯𓂃𓍯𓂃𓍯𓂃𓍯𓂃𓍯𓂃𓍯𓂃𓍯𓂃𓍯𓂃𓍯𓂃𓍯

you ask and you shall receive 🫡

-love, a.

[obscureother]

the og cockney criminal f/o.

screaming for better res photos one day of him.

What do your f/o's hugs feel like? he gives hard tight hugs!! sometimes theyre cold tho if he's been outside rgkf- or very warm cos he just got back from ESCAPING THE POLICE. good strong hugs tho, he gives hard pats on the back or very big squeezes -v-

What are your favorite dates to have with them? s/i 1's most favorite date he ever took her on was one where he couldn't afford a proper dinner date somewhere nor did he really have a place to stay for the night. . but this was when he was still too anxious to go to her house often. so what he did was he found a very obscure alley, and he got some mattresses and blankets and stuff and made a little fort for them (cos bb loves the forts, and it would keep them from getting rained on if there was weather). he got spray paint, chinese takeout, and stole a guitar. . and they hung out together for the night until she convinced him to go home with her once they were getting tired. . he was teaching her how to draw with the spray paint, got her extra shrimp on her little rice box. . played a little quiet guitar for her while they laid on each other. very nice night for them. . for me and barry tho, i like taking him out with me to old drive-ins or car shows :0 he likes old cars and motorcycles and stuff, and i like the movies. . so car shows and drive-in theatres are like. . the coolest for him to go on. uvu

What are their favorite dates to have with you? he likes to find hideouts i think :0 or spending the night at hotels where they can do whatever they want no consequences (except s/i 1 still worries about trashing the hotel room consequences and doesnt usually fall into that kdjfds-) but he likes going to cool abandoned stuff or finding neat places to sneak into with her. i think he would do the same with me, except given the f/o version of him cant drag me out to scary places, he just keeps me feeling safe whenever im walking around at night and thats how we talk and hang out sometimes.

Do you have any songs that remind you of them? Do they have any songs that make them think of you? oh lots of them tbh. . he would have a whole playlist if i made the time, but i think our jam is Motley Crue "Rock 'N Roll Junkie," especially cos it came from the movie he's from. I think he's gotten into the Arctic Monkeys "R U Mine" one tho. . ?

What's the height difference between you and your f/o? he is uhh. . 5'11", so roughly 6 inches or so taller than me or s/i 1.

On a 1-10 scale, with 1 being the least and 10 being the most, how much do they like PDA with you? 10/10 will make out sloppy for PDA. Does not care, would do it just to show off or fluster me or s/i 1 for sure.

What's your favorite feature about your f/o? other than his outfit, i do just like the way he giggles and grins. . i like his hair tho too. i dont normally think of lighter hair colors, but his is good. i like his swoopy curls going on. . they make me want to hold on them.

What do you think they smell like? assuming he's not covered in blood and sweat from fighting on the streets, he normally smells very heavily of worn leather, cheap cologne, smoke, whiskey. . like, you know he's been outside and that jacket has gone through every kind of weather, but the leather smell is still thick and very addictive. bad influence he is. if he doesnt get you smoking off his cigarettes, drinking with him, or doing something stupid, you get hooked on his jacket like the metaphorical drug he's looking for instead.

What is your f/os biggest love languages? They don't have to be one of the "five", it can be anything specific they use to show you love. he's very physical, but to know he's not just thinking of you as a one-off, its just that he keeps coming back for you. he keeps in contact with you, he trusts you. . the man is on the run. if he wants to keep you, he's going to try to, even if he can't do it as often as he likes at first. he has to ease himself into feeling safe to keep going back to somewhere not because of you, but because of the people he works for or against, and because he's scared of putting the one he cares about in danger. To know him as anything other than "Smiley" or see the tender side from his alter ego, that is his one step towards maybe liking you more than he planned to. he also has teasing where he's being a bully, and teasing because he likes someone and likes to see their cute reactions to things or play with them. he banters for love.

Do you guys sleep in the same bed? If so, what's it like sleeping with them? barry, both as f/o and in the universe with s/i 1, will. . try on occasion to stay the night. he gets anxious about the police or his enemies finding him when he sleeps somewhere, and on top of him worrying about them getting the other person involved, he doesnt always actually sleep when he stays the night unless he is plum exhausted from running or other things. he likes to share a bed with me or s/i 1, he likes to get close and grabby and physical until we/they both fall asleep because he rarely gets that anymore even from the girls he used to sleep with, but he feels like he cannot or something bad will happen.

What's your favorite headcanon about your f/o? ok ive got a couple. one: the guy can almost never just freaking die lol. he's gotten a tv smashed on his head in a flooded boat, several car and motorcycle wrecks, he's fallen from the like, fifth floor of the Capitol Records building or something ONTO A PIANO. . omg. and then for f/o version, i HC that Ford didn't quite get a fatal shot on him and Smiley was just stunned. He just has immeasurable luck against fate itself or something lol. He's escaped traps and captures i dont know how many times. two: he had to learn to like cats. . he used to hate them. very much a dog guy instead, he likes the scary ones but he also likes really any kind of dog that isnt just annoying (he's less fond of the yappy smaller breeds), but he does learn to like cats. . so now he likes my cats :)) but only my cats. . and only some of the nice strays he's come across, but he's still kind of hesitant of cats most of the time.

What is the dynamic that you and your f/o have? very stereotypical bad boy/criminal x good girl kind of thing. he would sneak onto college grounds with s/i 1 or me, smuggle himself places he wasnt supposed to be to meet up. he's got a soft spot for ones like s/i 1. . very tough guy/soft baby contrast going on. love him. he does indulge in those stereotypes or lets us play cops and robbers with him but hot wheels version.

What does your f/o do for you when you're having a rough day? he doesnt know well how to comfort really other than going like "ah yeah, fak that guy." or getting your mind off things. he'll get me to think of other stuff like cool stories he's got of literal crimes he's committed, bank heists he went on, or he plays hot wheels with me or tells me about cool cars he saw or got to ride (as in he stole them, and they may or may not have been crashed before he could return them from "borrowing" them for a joy ride.) he also talks in funny cockney slang, usually insults or horrible things one shouldnt say to make me laugh. uvu

Do you like to hold hands? If so, what's that like? ya!! he let me hold his hand, he dont mind 👉🏻 👈🏻 he would rather be holding other things rdfgkdf- he's kind of a grabby guy, but he can hold hands too instead. he keeps a good grip on me to keep me safe, its kind of a habit for him, but not so tight or overly protective as other f/os are. more casual for him.

Do they like to give you little kisses? If so, where is their favorite place to kiss? (Face, hands, etc) ya he like give kisses. . he kinda messy or like. . in the face with them tho sometimes. not that he cant be sensual or tender or that its all the time, but its kind of like. yknow, how you would expect rough guys or flirty criminals to kiss you. he gives them on the neck, side of the face, or the side or top of the head. sometimes he gives shoulder kisses. .

Vice versa, do YOU like to give them little kisses? If so, where is YOUR favorite place to give them? ya i give him kisses too :0 i like to kiss his face -v- on his stubble, or pinch his cheeks before i kiss them!! i kiss his hands. . on his knuckles, his fisties. cos they do too much punching. they need more kisses. forehead kisses. . chest, shoulder kisses. . yaa, i love give himb kisses <33

What's your favorite silly leisure activity to do with your f/o? he plays hot wheels with me :0 or he teaches me cockney slang! usually bad things i wont never say to people skdjsf= but its fun!! and he teases me when i dont say something right. sometimes we also watch scary movies, cos he likes those -v- he'll make fun of people on the tv then we both make fun of them together.

What is your favorite compliment that your f/o gives you? What is your favorite nickname that they have for you, if they have one? he gives spicy compliments usually 😳 i dont mind those, but he does tease me cos im not used to spicy things. . but we make references to bonnie and clyde (i know, basic 😔 but we joke about how we DONT get caught and filled with holes kfsd-) or being partners in crime. . sometimes he teases me for being like. . the polar opposite of how he is, "good girl" kind of thing if you will.

What's your favorite compliment to give THEM? What is your favorite nickname to call them? i like to talk to him about his smile. . s/i 1 once told him that even tho everyone calls him "Smiley" because he laughs or grins when he does his job or gets into any kind of trouble, she calls him that and just thinks of how warm his smile is or makes her feel. . he gets called a few things other than smiley, tho. he's normally just called Barry, but sometimes he's called things like "giggly crime man" or "cockney criminal" (while technically i now have two of those, there is really only one that i regularly call that and that is him.) there's no other "cockney criminal" to me than Barton. . 🖤

I want everyone to have the chance to ramble about their romantic f/os, so I'm gonna make a reblog game where yall can answer the plethora of questions I'm gonna toss down. Any of the questions you want to answer, as little or as much as you'd like!! I'll read them all. PR.O.SHIP DNI!!! AT ALL! GET OUT-

SO!! SELFSHIPPERS! RIDDLE ME THIS:

What do your f/o's hugs feel like?

What are your favorite dates to have with them?

What are their favorite dates to have with you?

Do you have any songs that remind you of them? Do they have any songs that make them think of you?

What's the height difference between you and your f/o?

On a 1-10 scale, with 1 being the least and 10 being the most, how much do they like PDA with you?

What's your favorite feature about your f/o?

What do you think they smell like?

What is your f/os biggest love languages? They don't have to be one of the "five", it can be anything specific they use to show you love.

Do you guys sleep in the same bed? If so, what's it like sleeping with them?

What's your favorite headcanon about your f/o?

What is the dynamic that you and your f/o have?

What does your f/o do for you when you're having a rough day?

Do you like to hold hands? If so, what's that like?

Do they like to give you little kisses? If so, where is their favorite place to kiss? (Face, hands, etc)

Vice versa, do YOU like to give them little kisses? If so, where is YOUR favorite place to give them?

What's your favorite silly leisure activity to do with your f/o?

What is your favorite compliment that your f/o gives you? What is your favorite nickname that they for you, if they have one?

What's your favorite compliment to give THEM? What is your favorite nickname to call them?

Okay I can't wait to see some answers!! Feel free to reblog as many times with as many f/os as you want. ANYONE CAN PARTICIPATE! SEEING THIS POST IS AN INVITATION FOR YOU!!

People I'd like to see answer this off the top of my head (but don't have to!!): @moxanji-real @one-winged-dreams @lovesickvalentines @graveluvr @clawingatmy-enclosure @starshakez @jpeg-indulgence @everynya @tropgothships @selfshipping-tboy @amelielovesamaris @pixel-comfort @fl0ralsxgar

[neshamama]

journaling health and going insane but trying to let it out as part of the process of connecting with it and the world realities beyond the inward overwhelm

im without job and health insurance but i have 90 days of my MS medications and even though i am due for a neuro follow up and an echocardiogram i will wait until the state agents finish my applications.. i have mental health issues that haven't been treated in months besides telehealth therapy but i have prn anxiety medication.

the force of depression in multiple sclerosis looks like this: my legs especially hurt to the soles of my feet, rn the brain interprets wearing socks as rough and burning sensation because the brain and spine are damaged,.so there are sensory and spastic arguments, bilaterally, all day every day. the temp is 0⁰F so i can't go without wearing clothes or blankets that trigger symptoms. i also cant have anything too hot or it will cause a reversible exacerbation (even being on your period or getting overwhelmed emotionally can upset nerve conduction in demyelinated cells due to temperature change alone. i moved climate zones after tropical weather was too much. very real and strange phenomenon that i blame myself for not controlling - like the frustration of my arms going numb because my coffee is too hot)

this is all so lonely and when i get up my legs want to give up so soon. i plan breaks and place chairs around the house and of course i have to use a cane all the time. i leave interesting footprints in the snow by the way omg. basic things like taking out trash i cannot do and i wished to be dependent on no one growing up and it disappoints and scares me to adapt to a radically different outcome. i have to trust others and engage with them enough to meet my needs and even if it ends up ok, i feel so guilty for taking help. i will need financial support from my family and i feel so guilty.

meanwhile my brain has been locked on trauma because im not managing emotions very well and my thoughts are rogue and unregulated by stability and routine like of work. applying for jobs i do think of who was omnipresent in my life during my education and career in art and it's a pain held in my body. those years death was the most comforting thought, including the death of the primary abuser and i still think of it daily. i really wish i could move on because wanting to kill is disturbing. i got this way before all of this from deadly physical and sexual abuse from like 2 decades ago again obviously i survived and i really thought that was enough. i swear predators recognize who has survived already, they vet their vulnerabilities and then exploit and silence them again. still i struggle feeling safe anywhere. i need to do more emdr and in office therapy. Also see psychiatrist and update meds.

so im in and out of recognizing life let alone appreciating it which is dangerous cuz it makes it all easier to get out of living. i am afraid to reach out to my mother who is my local support because i don't want to worry and bother her

what i wish is to feel myself again and connect with others and the world again but that seems so far away. my heart is tarred and my brain - an electrical fire my legs prickly weights. very challenging to overcome how this feels and maintain positive beliefs.

first though i want to rest and recover physically and emotionally, see neuro and psych, upgrade level of therapeutic care, hold off on the shame of these struggles and simply try to get through them. right now without income or insurance i am in another tough situation.

im going to apply for a job today with the scarce descriptions of my experience cuz i think in this case details are less important and i can discuss work i did outside that triggering time so..see what happens

stay alive

[dadacryphilia]

Please read before following!

Warning: My blog is strictly 18+ and contains hard kinks that may be triggering to some. All kinks are safe and consensual. Feel free to block if you don't want to see my posts, I understand and will not take it personally. There will be a small list of the kinks I will post below that I suggest you read before following. If I reblog from you and you would like me to remove it, let me know and I will.

About Me: My name is Shawn (He/Him), I'm Pansexual and I am single (not looking). I'm from Ontario, Canada. I am 6'2 and chubby. I have anxiety issues and adhd. I do my best to reply to DMs/Asks but sometimes being social is hard for me so I wont be as talkative. With that being said, I do love making new friends and getting to know my mutuals so feel free to message me if those things wont bother you. Sometimes I post audios which you can find here.

My Kinks: Ageplay, CNC, Piss play, Somno, Dacryphilia, Fauxcest, Breeding, Lots of other things

DNI: Minors, Homophobes, Transphobes, Racists

Mutuals: You can message me anytime, I love making new friends. You can also feel free to ask for my Discord if you'd like (It's where I am most active). However you shouldn't expect me to just Dom you right away, actually talk to me and get to know me a bit first.

Non-Mutuals: If you have a NSFW side blog and you follow me from your main, let me know so I can follow it. I don't often follow people unless they follow me first, incase they may not want me interacting with them.

Other socials/places to talk to me:

Snapchat: Dadcryphilia

Twitter: @meaniedada

Bluesky: @meaniedada

Session: 05283dcbe46f8adb2689de3e9c0e7bdb878dd474af38504f25901a1352c7ab426e

Discord (where im most active): Mutuals can ask for my discord if they'd like!

[autisticlee]

I hate when people tell me "friendships don't last/will change over time and fade away" and say I need to get used to/accept it. maybe that's easy for YOU. but most of these people also have committed partners that they expect to stick with for life. why can't I want that too? as an aroace person that needs to rely on platonic relationships to get the support and connection I need to thrive in life, and as an autistic and disabled person that needs consistency and routine and security and constant support to feel safe and comfortable to thrive in this society, telling me "people come and go/friendships aren't forever" REALLY HURTS. it feels awful. it makes me feel hopeless and even more alone. makes me feel like i'll always be drifting through life with no support and alone forever until I can't survive anymore because I *need* help and support and consistent companionship to live a healthy and stable life!

being aroace, I don't have the benefit of getting a partner to fill the gaps a lack of friendship leaves. I have no one to turn to when my friends disappear from my life or betray me. I have to rely on these unstable/inconsistent/short-lived relationships. it's not sustainable and makes my life extremely hard and scary and hopeless. so telling me it's "normal" and I should "get used to it" doesn't do anything for me when I need it to last for more reasons than everyone else uses friends for.

I know it's unfair/wrong to "trap" someone into a committed platonic relationship that makes them feel like i'm "trying to date them" (ive had this accusation thrown at me before, then the person ghosts me after) but I really do think I need a committed platonic relationship. one that lasts and one that's two way and secure and consistent. no one wants to offer that though. they save it for their romantic partners only. the sad reality is, romantic relationships are always going to be placed above, and even replace platonic ones. leaving me, an aroace who needs those discarded platonic bonds, out of luck and left out. forever alone, as the old tumblr meme once went (which i'm sure 99% of those people who used the meme are now i'm committed relationships and/or have at least dated a few times)

I know, i'll be told I need a "queer platonic relationship" but that's not as simple as going shopping and picking one out. I dont even know how you get one! that's as much of an enigma to me as dating and making friends! getting a platonic friend to commit to you're friendship for life and be your life partner and not drop you for no reason, as soon as they make a new best friend, or as soon as they start dating? sounds more impossible than simply making casual friends I can convince to play a video game with me once a month (im lucky if they give me time once a year.....or 3)

i've tried establishing with certain people I feel comfortable with and get along with well that I want and need this type of "qpr" but they either mistake it for asking them to date, are afraid of commitment and ghost me immediately, or slowly start to push me away and decide their new friends are better. so it's not something I can just "get" from any friendship i'm finding. i'm not even sure exactly what it would look like. the best I can use to describe it is the found/chosen family trope where a two or more people come together to form a family where they help and protect each other and live together for life. they don't date. they are more than friends. they are a family and need each other and rely on each other and it stays like that. but that often feels like it can only happen in fiction. real humans aren't like that.

however, i'm told by other chosen families/best friends/people in qpr that it is possible. so then comes the dreaded "one day" they all tell me about. (I don't want it one day I want it NOW. i'm living in the present not the future!) so I have a vague idea of what I want/need, but not what it actually looks like, how to find it, where to look, or how to cope without it. I need more than a couple friends I see and talk to once i'm a while. I need more than a group chat. I need more than someone I get coffee with every weekend. I need a roommate, a forever bond. someone I live with and have separate lives from, but also share our lives together at the same time. the perspn who supports me when i need it, the person I support at all times. but someone who doesn't expect romance and sex. someone who isn't looking for "something better" and using me as temporary filler until they get better friends or a partner. someone who doesn't give up and run away from commitment. someone who wants to stay in my life for the rest of life. someone who puts me first and is committed to me as I am to them.

a life partner, or small family group.

but so far I've just been stuck on my own and I dont have the patience or energy to keep waiting 30+ more years for this "one day" to come and I don't have any options to make it come faster....RIGHT NOW is more important and i'm struggling in the present.

sometimes being aroace really sucks....

[soaps-mohawk]

Hehehe thank you for giving me the permission to yap. Idk how long this will end up being so grab a snack to read-

(and to my ask before. I agree with you. I was close to rage quitting SO MUCH but then I'd cry cause I didn't want to loose where I was in the mission so I cried my way through it. Darn you Kyle for falling out of that plane... and yes. I used youtube vids for the alone mission HELP)

Okaayyy my fic idea. Its possibly going to be a dystopien omegaverse fic, reader is a omega, Price and Ghost are alpha's and Soap and Gaz betas (I've always imagined them like that since reading ur fic, but i make them other things depending on the ship. and what the story is like. like nikprice, i oftern think of alpha x alpha or make John a omega heh)

So outline part 1 is, the worlds population has been greatly plumeting, since the old goverment wasnt strict as the new one. The new goverment takes over, and builds a intitute that forces omegas into it as soon as they present to teach them to be the 'perfect omega'. its one of those VERY messed up places, like the guards or workers dont give a damn, they get no help and are brainwashed to not tell anyone abt how it works. (This was one of the parts where i was scared it was close to urs, thats why im yapping now so if u think its too close u can scold me and tell me to think of smt else LOL)

As soon as omega's hit 18, they are sent out into a pack or with an alpha. betas can join a waiting list, but alphas get priority. Now, when the rest of the task force was offered, they declined. But poor Johnny just wanted his own lass, he didn't think it'd be bad. so he joins the waiting list, and ends up getting reader. And well the rest arent happy cause now they gotta help look after this traumatised lil thing.

What i was thinking, Johnny has never had a omega, because of the intitute and goverment. So he has no proper idea on how to care for an omegas needs, like heats and everything. so he ends up getting the rest of the team to slowly help (it overtime becomes a poly relationship) but as reader feels safer, she ends up feeling safe enough to talk about what happened in the institute (cause whos gonna come after a military pack, they're protecting her?!)

but ofc, the goverment finds out and like nup they aint having that, and they take her back. (this is sometime idk when) but they all end up turning against the whole goverment and yada yada. Theres prob A LOT i would change so far and add, but I havent gotten that in depth yet.

do u think thats too simular to CRCB... idk I was thinking about it once then i remember oh crap thats sounding a lil familiar- part of the reason i wanted to tell you abt it, also just bc i wanted to yap abt it bc if i end up writing/changing it its just rlly interesting. you dont veen gotta answer this if its too close just msg me and scold me HELP-

anyway ill stop my yapping before it turns into a novel.

Reminder to get a drink and a snack, I hope you can get plenty of rest <3 (apologies for any spelling mistakes, I'm half asleep and couldn't be entirely bothered to reread and Im just praying it makes sense. Grammarly dont like me)

I think that's a great idea!! Very unique!! I'm glad I could inspire you to write your own fic and I don't mind the similar ideas. (So long as credit is given where credit is due)

[spinecurlingmice]

being autistic in fandom spaces is like really miserable because iiiiiii miss social cues a lot. and text cues i either miss frequently or interpret differently than intended. which makes me analyze characters different and need things explained of what was like. Actually meant. but sometimes people are assholes and that always sticks with me a lot more than anybody calmly explainging it to me ever will

[lovelyrotter]

can ppl in this fandom like... stop... implying that transmasculinity in hcs or (especially) canon is shallow or misogynistic or even transmisogynistic on princible, like literally just by being prescent in someones mind or in the text. like that doesnt fuckin feel good. thats kind of really nasty to imply. if its not okay to say about other trans experiences, maybe dont say it about this one either. why is there a weird little exception here. yall KNOW how much that sucks to hear all day every day. what the fuck

[persy-r-bozo]

[tpup]

having such an absolute shit time which is horrible because I had put so much effort into making this week bareable only to be fuckin stranded in the worst place I could be rn because my health was so bad I couldn't leave i feel so fucking bad and helpless and fated to having to suffer over and over and over

[nabaath-areng]

Being brought up on a farm and only ever going back indoors to head right back out again for my whole life, the decreasing amount of insects has been extremely noticeable and it's been going on for years. Of course it's been worrying with the climate catastrophe, and once I became a beekeeper and learned more about my village's local flora it became even more glaring.

So imagine my surprise this year when there are more insects than I can count. Sitting on my porch (practically my room during summers) I'm noticing species I haven't seen since I was at least a young teenager, and there are more butterflies of different varieties than I even remember from my childhood!

There are so many bees flying around too, probably from the hives down by the old homestead buildings by the church and school, owned by the woman I know from the local beekeeper's association.

What's more is that this year there has been no drought OR flooding, so there are a lot more flowers blooming for longer, and everyone in my village as well as the surrounding villages are reporting a burst of activity in their hives... as well as higher activity from the wild bees and pollinators. For the first time in years it's starting to resemble the way it was when I was younger.

All that is to say, the climate catastrophe is real, and in my area it's causing a lot more violent thunderstorms... but oh my god all this reminds me why I persist despite the despair that tries to dig its claws in.

I may not be able to do major change on a global scale, but you can bet me and everyone here will at least try and support this little place. We can keep going in the fight against the municipality that wants to urbanize at the cost of our precious biodiversity, and we can continue to fight to keep out the cities that tries to enroach on us and get closer.

It is rare for villages in Götaland to remain this free from urbanization despite being nestled right in the middle of multiple major cities, and there's no excuse to destroy what little there is left of it down here in the south.

[halfdeadwallfly]

watching my friends spend time together while consistently cancelling plans with me and promising they want to hang out they just cant

[suffercerebral]

me having gone to bed at 6 am every day for the past week and generally spiraling mentally while rotting in bed waking up this morning: a 4 mile hike in the heat is a really good idea right now, and while we're at it let's start like 3 art projects

[dont-fucning-look-at-this]

Loss for words

I don’t like war, though

It feels inevitable

A paradox of lies and cheaters in silk robes

And though enemy territory is still miles away

I can feel their soil under my feet

As they dance in circles around trees

I’ve seen my sisters do the same

Why does it have to be a competition

To see who can be more dead

Why am I the one that has to live through history

Why can’t it be my grandparents

They’re much more suited for the scandal

They can pay what I cannot

My soul is not prepared for branding

What does it mean to be nineteen and hated

Why am I the one that has to fear for my life

We’re all next no matter what we do

Even when we win we loose

What does it mean to live while dying

Why can I not see the future

We’re fighting against iron walls

But all were given wooden clubs

What does it mean to be young now

Why do the old get to dictate what I do

Poetry and literature and blood and air

I don’t want to fight for my hands and feet

What does it mean to be a soldier

Young heads pounding through streets

They take away what we want

Then they’ll take away what we need

What does it mean to be a target

And why does it have to be now

The billionaires will keep getting richer

Until they burn everything down

[savage-rhi]

.Magenta.

[capyclub]

.