Sorry for jumping in on another ask's ramblings (and if this is something you already had planned, feel free to not answer XD) but i think the beta boys seeing y/n's blisters and telling Price about them could absolutely be a wake up call to just how she was "trained" never to ask for anything, never complain, only to accept what she's given and be a "good omega"
Don't apologize for joining the convo!! I love it!!
We've definitely come to a turning point in the story when the guys are starting to notice perhaps there's some things that aren't quite right. I mean, they've already noticed the reader isn't quite telling them the whole story about some things and that's really going to start to unravel here in the next few chapters.
To drop in some world building into this ask 🤭 (I have no self control lmaoo) the average alpha and beta don't really know what omega institutes are like and what they teach. They're all very different too, depending on the institute. The one the reader went to is like top of the line, (in American terms) like private school, Ivy League, maybe almost military academy level type of institution where there's a lot of prestige around it and it's very hard to get in. (That's why Price had that moment in chapter 2 where he was like "how did a Staff Sergeant get their kid into this institute" because they won't just take anybody.) So the guys don't really have a concept of what she went through aside from just looking at the kinds of tests she was given and the information in her file. The only way they'll really know what it was like is if she tells them. They don't even really know what happened during her time with the CIA.
Anyway, there will be a lot of realizations on everyone's parts and that's really going to be a big part of the plot moving forward. It's easy for me to forget even that...it's only been like just over a week at this point in the story. There's still a lot they have to unpack, things they need to learn about each other. They're still kind of strangers, despite how close reader is getting to at least Gaz and Soap already.
But yeah, long story short, that's gonna be coming up here in future chapters.
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wolfstar!
(Send me a ship and I'll give you my honest opinion on them)
quite literally my one true pairing.. i barely talk about them with even sude or kara. it makes me feel vulnerable….. they’re very deeply special to me and have been for over a decade. im unwilling and unable to ship them with anyone else and whenever i do see a sirius or remus ship outside of wolfstar i send it to kara to ask if it’s good. because i can’t tell.. this is my burden to bear.. and i do somwtimes wish i could be compelled by other sirius or remus ships, but alas.. this is what being unhealthily obsessed with a one (1) ship during your formative years does to a mf :/ before 2023 i hadn’t read fanfiction about anything or anyone else ever. no other fandom, no other pairing .. just me and my little guys for 12 years <3
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YES thank you @kyanako5972 for your service 😤👏 (I was actually looping them both for a bit but I keep forgetting to run it lately ah...)
And hehe I have been ✨enabled ✨Have some Triage thoughts, and feel free to add your own!!
Starting off with my main praise of the song: “I want to be Innocent, I want to live.” I know the point of milgram is that all the characters are going to get worse, but I feel like this video is the first t2 song we’ve seen a prisoner get better. (People have talked about his savior complex being an issue but that’s coming after the inno verdict, in Triage he specifically says he never wanted this to be some kind of hostage situation where he has the power to save/kill people.) This is when we can finally see one of our verdicts go right. The others had an issue, or creeping guilt, or uncertainty, but Shidou gets over any uncertainty right then and there – he wants to live again!! In a series so full of death, in which half of the cast makes some reference to suicidal thoughts, plus two victims who did commit suicide, there’s something extremely profound about seeing one of them change their mind onscreen. We hadn’t gotten a moment of healing like that before, and I doubt we’re ever going to get one again.
The moment itself is shown very accurately and beautifully, in my opinion. His expression when he makes his statement about wanting to live is so unique. It’s not a smile, it’s not a grimace, it’s something in between. His voice is strained, but set. He’s not excited about it – when you’re in that mental place, it isn’t a cheery switch to wanting to live, it’s a grit-your-teeth and pick yourself up and make the tough choice. It’ll be so, so hard but by god you have a job to do. It made sense, given all the previous mentions of him helping Fuuta and Mahiru – he had a lot of complicated feelings about being a doctor, but he remembered that saving others really is his purpose in life.
And then the shock factor. Because of that moment and the family reveal, I think this video had the biggest twist of t2. The others had surprises, sure, but they were hinted at in the voice clips and vds, or they just exaggerated things we already knew about the characters. I was completely blindsided by Triage. Everything leading up to it paralleled Shidou with Mahiru, so I thought it was just a lover he’d lost (and maybe someone he’d just met or something). He had his moments with Amane, but I always assumed it was because of her connection to him, not vice versa. I assumed he was just overdramatic and killing people for some lady he’d fallen for, and then decided to take the easy way out and ask for death. So to find out he had a fully established family, wife and two kids??? To see his main character trait from season one was completely reversed??? (but in a way that wasn’t at all forced???)
Now, it’s much easier to make a character unlikable than it is to redeem them. We saw how quickly the fandom turned on certain characters, we felt pangs of horror for many of them. But it’s very difficult to make someone like a character they’d previously despised. Which is why I’m insanely impressed with the way those three minutes could undo months of my hatred toward Shidou, and bring me literally to tears over him. Suddenly his actions weren’t so selfish, as rash. He’s not taking the coward’s way out. He had incredibly good reason to do what he did, and now he’s taking accountability and choosing to face pain in order to atone. I’ll add more in a sec, but it’s not even that the video shows him as this perfect saint. Without holding back on everything he’d done wrong, it conveyed a real, grieving human that really moved me.
Of course the music itself was amazing – Shugo Nakamura sounds incredible. I don’t know too much about actual music structure, but the tone of both Shidou’s songs manages to be so fun and relaxing while simultaneously filling you with that profound sadness. It’s like an embodiment of his peaceful, sad smile. There’s something so human about his voicemail message, and it’s unique hearing different types of speaking parts in a song! But that moment is also foreboding. You wonder why he missed the call, and who’s calling, and you kind of already know, and you hear the three beeps as the line is dead. Then there’s the gut-wrenching return of those sounds, with the added visuals bringing to mind a dying heart?? Insane.
And lastly, the visuals are gorgeous. Bringing back the flower/pomegranate symbolism in a similar but new way was perfect. The bright scenery and picturesque scenes really emphasized how happy he was. The video is so bright. His family is gorgeous, they’re happy. His neighborhood is sunny and warm. His house is comfortable and light. Which meant the dark scenes contrasted perfectly, driving home how jarring his loss was. And despite all the good things I said about him before, the video isn’t actually trying to paint him in an innocent light. There are literal graveyards behind him, showing how much blood is on his hands. The rotting food is such a disgustingly painful way to show what he was doing to people. He handed the tag directly to his son, showing full accountability: he gave his son his fate, he killed him himself. The images seem beautiful at first, especially compared to AKAA’s dark, bloody rooms, Backdraft’s grim tunnel, and INMF’s monstrous bees. But no matter how lovely it looks, it successfully conveys a truly horrendous crime.
In conclusion Shidou my fucking beloved. Go watch Triage again :3
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I saw the other anon's ask about the second omega and remembered!! that I had a dream like that after maraphoning CRCB (again)
basically reader and Simon just weren't the right fit and Price, seeing reader being upset about it, asked Kate for a second omega, mostly so they could tag-team this skullfaced goth bitch with affection and love and acceptance and stuff
and the second omega turned out to be the one reader had a relationship with back in the training, so! closure! and reader has all her favorite people in one place (and also some wlw action lmao)
Anon....have you been in my brain??? 😳
No because the way I have been fighting with myself not to bring in the omega that reader had a crush on into this fic 😭
I also had an idea for a sort of not really AU of this fic directly but something similar where there's two omegas involved....
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Wait so does Oct know that Jed has autism or no?
i guess he doesn't, but neither does jed. i don't think jed's diagnosed or has done much research into autism, he just knows he has certain needs and triggers and a different worldview to a lot of people. he's got a good solid support network and a job that works well for his lifestyle and mental health and he's pretty happy with where he's at with that kind of thing. he does have moments where he goes non verbal but again, he's used to this and so are his friends and he knows how to cope with it and it's not a big deal to him. octavius isn't really written to be autistic (though its kind of impossible for me to write someone who isn't because i am autistic myself) but he does have his own fair share of experience with anxiety and feeling overwhelmed in social situations so he really doesn't see jed as particularly different to himself. of course he does come to recognise and understand and accommodate for jed's specific needs, but i think he relates to him so much that he wouldn't really notice something like that
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