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#im actually mad dont talk to me rn
feddy-34 · 4 months
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3-aem · 2 months
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reading im courting you now i guess by solarbishop and its so cute i love the characterization its like warm milk for my exhausted brain
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skybristle · 6 months
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maybe this is just me being annoyed but whenever i try to talk abt my ocs here [which i very rarely do for this exact reason] it always gets zero engagement whatsoever. like i dont come here for Attention i come here for interaction which do kind of go hand in hand but. getting like 7 likes any time i pour my heart out about my guys is. disheartening. and it sucks because talking abt them is part of the way to get people to care! but i dont have the motivation for comics all the time [and when i do they dont get much attention either]. i feel like i should just stick to discord but im soo desprate to be heard and i feel like its hard to find The Right People to talk to
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faaun · 1 month
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ok let's catch up quickly
#so i went on a few dates w this guy. long hair beautiful face kinda looked like a girl (good) said yes ma'am when i told him to do smth#(also good) film student great at photography including candids. made a sheath of leather for a sword pin i have . et cetera.#he asked to cuddle and i was like iggg and then i felt Nothing and i was like ohhh yh ok ok yep lesbian#like he meets almost all my criteria but. yeahhh no . also at the end of that date he had some weird takes. anyway broke up w him and told#him actually im p sure im a lesbian (again) and he was like yk thats the second time this has happened to me this week but its ok bc ive#fallen for this girl from berlin. and then we cooked together. anyway . met a beautiful butch lowk in love w her. weve been on (1) date.#have two exams in a few days havent studied enough going to like end it all basically. my research partner kicked me off our research#(expected(it was always skinda sketchy)) which was devastating + it happened in a lidl 15 hours into a journey from bordeaux#to go back to the UK. my friends were kinda busy paying for baguettes but also they heard this whole exchange and are kinda mad at him#my friend of 10+ years is coming over in a few days. my evil ex situationship person that i decided to stay friends w because i kept#insisting they are a good friend and not evil and also extremely beautiful? turns out shockingly enough they were evil. tried to fix them#and then i realised due to their entire friendship group being ppl like me (Every Single One of their friends are ppl they met on dating#apps then led on then dumped and proposed staying friends w) and are collectively extremely attracted to them and not over them they#keep validating the most diabolical shit they say/do to hace a chance w them. they broke up w their ex and the way they keep leading#this poor girl on and making her heartbeeak worse and saying that they want more power over her and want her to beg for them back etc...MY#JAW HAD DROPPED esp bc i didnt even know the ex was in the picture BECAUSE ME AND ONE OF OUR FRIENDS (that they also dated) HAD JUSR SLEPT#NAKED TOGETHER IN THEIR BED W THEM. GIRL. anyway that is the least of the diabolical stuff they said but no we are moving onnn#this was b4 the beautiful butch btw. anyways . i have a mitski concert tmrw i think?? idek anymore#i used to have a crush on this guy very briefly and then it disappeared and then i realised if he fundementally changed everything abt#himself then maybe id like him but ofc i didnt tell him that but i still think abt it sometimes but anyway thats irrelevant now bc 99% sure#even if he did id still not find him attractive (lesbianism). please recommend good overnight moisturisers btw i have super dry skin#right. the friend of 10 yrs. we had a hard convo abt why she essentially bullied me in year 8 and it made me highly bitter but i also love#her and ik things are diff now its been like . Many Years . and shes going to stay a while I HAVE TWO EXAMS I DONT HAVE TIME but i love her#its fine. i think i might just switch into medicine and do the whole become a neurosurgeon thing (which was my plan B) bc plan A is looking#kinda impossible rn. I WANNA TALK MORE ABT WHAT THE EX SITUATIONSHIP PERSON SAID but i wont bc i dont wanna be too mean but also . MY GOD#i had a conversation w a philosopher friend about whether i have a moral responsibility to try to fix them bc unleashing this on society#feels wrong and he said 'probably but...run' so yeah im not talking to them atm. second date w beautiful butch on monday btw IDK WHAT TO#WEAR. she said she likes fems. im just gonna wear the shortest ralph lauren skirt i have w the cute leg warmers and hope 4 the best#its 1:15 AM im abt to drink coffee and start studying bc what the FUCK man. also almost finished watching the boys its very good#one of my best friends is struggling rn it is breaking my heart i want to take the burden from her i miss her very much
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sneezydarliing · 1 year
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Sensitive Jouno. Allergic Jouno. Just Jouno having the worst time in a place he’d rather not be in but what can he do? NOTHING. L bozo skill issue (he’s very cute)
THANK YOU for the ask and actually pushing me to post this ,,,, very nervous about it
White Hibiscus
words- 1,093
fandom- BSD
characters- Jouno, Tecchou
The day had begun normally enough. Tecchou sat in the back of a vehicle, idly snacking on an egg, Jouno to his right. The man was sitting as far away from him as he could, brows furrowed and lip pushed out in a way that could nearly be described as pouting, twitching with every crunch! as Tecchou took another bite. Tecchou used this as his entertainment until they arrived at their destination, the end of an old dirt road that transformed into a wide field. Both Hunting Dogs exited the vehicle, and Tecchou gave the driver a brisk nod of thanks as they began to drive off. 
Jouno had already begun to stalk off, clearly having no intentions of waiting, but Tecchou caught up with ease. He huffed at this, turning to Tecchou with an indignant look. "Why was i even paired up somebody like you? You breathe so loud, it’s messing me up.” Tecchou just shrugged. He wasn’t close to the other, but was well aware of his highly enhanced senses, and subsequent awareness at anythidng that seemed to bother them- which tecchou was a common victim of. 
Jouno just grumbled, walking faster. Tecchou looked down at the flowers they were trampling as they walked, noticing the pollen coating both of their boots, reflecting off of the dark surfaces. He had been smart enough to take allergy medicine in the morning. Jouno, however, stopped suddenly, standing straight. Tecchou froze too, waiting for whatever Jouno must have sensed to appear. But nothing did. A beat passed. Tecchou shifted forward to get a closer look at his partner, and the issue became obvious. 
Jouno’s nose was scruched up, and Tecchou watched as he gave a quick gasp- then another- and then his hands flew to his face as he pitched forward.  "hi'chiew!! hh.. hiD'sHhu..hH'CHhih!" he shook his head gentle and gave  a wet sniffle- before furrowing his brows and sniffling again. Finally, he lowered his hands, revealing a pink- tinted nose that wasn't far from matching the slightly faded red in his hair. 
Tecchou raised an eyebrow. Somehow, he'd never seen the other sneeze, or atleast not paid enough attention to realize it. Jouno sniffed again. "Stop staring at me. Have you never seen somebody sneeze?" "Not like that." He replied, kicking a stray stick out of his way. To that, Jouno gave a quiet grumble he didn’t bother to decipher. They continued to trudge through the field, stopping occasionally while Jouno let out more fittish sneezes.
 Tecchou chose to ignore this, examining the various flowers as he walked, and stopping as a small group caught his eye. He picked one up, gently, looking closer at the white and pink petals. It looked almost created in Jouno’s image, who was standing with his arms crossed, waiting impatiently for the other to finish. Tecchou could not find himself caring. He sat down, and began to munch on one of the snacks he kept in his pocket. 
The other, clearly did not appreciate this. He stomped over, giving the nature around them absolutely no thought, and pushed Tecchou roughly by the shoulders. He barely budged. Did not bother to say anything. He made no effort to listen to Jouno's complaints until they devolved into an itchy sounding cough, and looked up to find the other still standing over him, eyes streaming. 
None of this seemed to stop him from bothering tecchou, apparently, because he continued to kick and shove at him. Tecchou quickly had enough, and quickly threw Jouno down to the ground beside him, giving a quiet huff of laughter at his indignant squak in response to the jostling. 
"I can't believe you! We need to get moving, I'm not going to stay here overnight with you." Tecchou quickly tuned him out, instead looking at the bits of yellow pollen that had settled into Jouno's hair. 
The other seemed to notice it  too, if the way his features scrunched up said anything.  He watched in amusement as he lifted a gloved hand, equally covered, and scrubbed at his irritated nose, clicks of congestion audible as he worked it back and forth. This must have only worsened whatever tickle he had, because his breath caught in a quick gasp. 
“hhIH-shihht’cHhiew- i’sHHhiew! hIh.. snF!” Tecchou raised an eyebrow. "Is there something bothering you?" Jouno snapped his head to face him, angry expression destroyed by the way his nose continued to twitch, clearly not done with him. 
"This- hH'knGt'ue! This is all.. alhh'cHhiew- hiD'TCHiew! your fault.. hihh.. hH-tSCH'ue!" Jouno stuttered through the sentence, nose twitching in between each release. Tecchou just hummed as his chest rose again, and let out yet another pitchy sneeze. 
Jounos nose seemed far from satisfied, red-rimmed and wet and trembling with need, but even as he roughly pawed at it with a wrist, a rare sliver of pale skin exposed, nothing seemed to come out of his hitching breaths. 
"Are you okay? We can turn back." Tecchou did not consider himself a cruel man, but the rare opportunity to turn Jouno’s teasing back on himself couldn't be resisted, even by himself. 
"I- holdonn-t’SCh’ieww! need you to… to get your sorry ass up so we can keep moving." With that, he suddenly sits up, dislodging a stray flower petal that had been resting in his hair. Tetchou watched it float down gracefully, before making its home perched gently atop the gentle slope of jounos sensitive nose. The effect of the touch was almost instant, jouno struggling to even get his hands up to his face in time as he gasped. 
"t’CHhiew- aH’TSChi- SCHhiew! hehh.. hIH-tCHue! f-fuck.. t’SChih- t’SCHh- hiDt’SHiew!" Tears flood freely from Jouno’s red-rimmed eyes, face flushed as he panted. He gave tecchou an empty glare, looking angry and possibly embarrassed- though it may have judt been the irritated redness in his face. 
"hhIh- how are you not being affected by any of this this?!" He demanded, as if somehow accusing Jouno of placing the pollen in the field himself. 
"Antihistamine. I took one before I got here." Tecchou replied, blank-faced. It was common knowledge for the Hunting Dogs that the modifications to their bodies heightened their immune system, in turn causing all of them to have allergies. 
Jouno just huffed, caught in yet another tickle, evident by the quick "hiDt'sHhih!" Muffled into a wrist. It was tired, almost weak, but Tecchou wouldn't dare to say that. He simply stood, turned toward the slowly approaching clearing in the distance, and began to walk again, another sneeze the only confirmation Jouno was following. 
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332-442 · 2 years
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How do you stop coming across as angry 😭
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silverislander · 16 days
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working here is making me a little bit nuts abt antibullying again <3
#i mean ive always been a little nuts abt it. but its worse rn :)#i have been saying For Years that the reason antibullying campaigns have been so toothless is bc theyve ignored root causes#you cannot fight bullying while ignoring discrimination in our larger society#its not a fucking 80s movie people dont (frequently) get bullied Just for being nerds irl. the go to examples are so outdated#i could get into specifics but i think i dont need to! its ableism its racism its classism etc etc etc#we need to be actively teaching kids from a young age that at the bare minimum? acting on discriminatory beliefs is wrong#there needs to be actual consequences and understanding of why its wrong#we need to talk abt these issues WITH specifics. talk abt exactly whats wrong and why#call out specific common jokes explain slurs talk abt current events related to these issues#and fucking get rid of the 0 tolerance bullshit ive never heard of it doing anything but punishing the victim for fighting back#and i know some people will still be missed by this programming bc of their home life or influences. you really cant win them all#but you at least need to fucking try and attack this problem from the root instead of snipping vaguely at leaves#levi.txt#and i dont want to hear SHIT abt how your precious baby is too young to learn abt discrimination bc itll make them sad#as long as there are kids their age facing it? theyre not too young to try and understand#i just. aughhhh#like. ive been there dude i got bullied for a long ass time#didnt know why at the time but looking back it was absolutely bc i was nd#and that was so long ago and its still not better. it fuckin kills me man we should be getting over this#delete later#im very tired and this is a Big Rant but idfk man!! im mad#this shit ends lives youd think wed take it more seriously
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bunnyboy-juice · 2 months
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me (not joking, very stressed): i think im going to have a mental breakdown if something else goes wrong here.
everyone irl: hahahhahaa ur so funny(:
#i am literally 2 secobds from vomiting over how stressed i am about some worm stuff#*work stuff#but im glad my discomfort is entertaining for them 🙃🙃🙃#(im seriously fine i just have crippling anxiety to the point i speedran the medcard process in my state from how mt assessment went)#(and this would stress Anyone out so yk. i feel like im dying hahahaha)#im also aware mt reaction 8s an over reaction#it just like. kinda sucks that even when im being genuine no one believes me ;~;#no one really believes me unless im like. Actively spiraling in front of them#and then instead of offering support 9/10 ppl get mad and scared and upset that im having a reaction Period#bc they are so large and disproportionate 🤩#anyway. i may actually vomit about this cauze.my stomach wont calm down#and like theres truly solutions there#theres truly things that can be done#im just..so crisised out#between work and personal i have literally not had a SINGLE MONTH this year w/o some major crisis happening around me that im pulled into#i feel so sick#and i have to isolate myself to fix this but dont have the tiiiiiiiiiime available#so yk. doing Great (':#yes this is why ive been extremely online the last few months and Shari everything#i Cannot keep this in and i Cannot talk to people abt it#bc im at a place now where if im asked probing questions theres a 80% chance im gonna wanna explode#and ethically kt doesnt feel ok to go to people Knowing this will happen#im so deeply bot ok rn i am like. woozy#oh no
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mayoiayasep · 2 months
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yatora yaguchi when i fucking get you
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lystring · 1 year
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just love that amongst all the insane pushback people have been getting lately for talking very openly about fatphobia in our society which is a serious problem people are straight up reblogging posts adding severely triggering images of extremely anorexic people as some sort of Gotcha, like fatphobia Cant be real because Look how mean people are being about this person who is clearly dying from one of the worst diseases born Out Of Our Fucking Society Being Fatphobic im losing my mind what is happening etc
#like i dont think ive ever talked about this on this blog or ever#but i used to be DEEP into proana tumblr back in the day like.#most of us didnt consider ourselves 'proana' or 'probulimia' or whatever but it was a fucking lifestyle and it was a dark hole#that i had to claw myself out of#and im sorry its extremely triggering that people are harping onto posts TALKING ABOUT A REAL ISSUE THEY DO NOT EXPERIENCE#with images of severely diseased women sayin Well Actually Your Experiences Arent That Bad Cus Look#We Also Have It Bad#yeah well#one does not detract from the other#and also Maybe. hmm. there is a correlation...if not even causation........#maybeeeee if fatphobia wasn't such a huge issue....you wouldn't feel the need to...idk avoid experiencing that...#cus like okay I know im only speaking from my own experience but#seeing the way society treated fat people growing up constantly surrounded by people on Diets all the time#trying to Avoid being fat at All Cost#miiight have contributed to my ED and wanting to be skinny#like.#honestly moving away from those spaces and being friends with and following people that experience fatphobia#has heloed me in soooo many ways to just like accept myself a bit more and also realize the enormous damage#that fatphobia does to us through media and social media like#im honestly just ranting rn but god im so mad#I saw like One Too Many posts like that but didn't wanna jump on being annoying so i made my own posr#im sorry for anyone going through it rn being stuck in proana or fitblr whatever hell#because like it wont make it better. it will feel like your only escape because People in your life wont understand#but it will just continue to pull you in until nothing else or no-one else mkes sense#and that is Not Good or okay and yeah#talk to someone outside of this site about this please#don't argue with others talking about their own experiences that you cant relate to because if you somehow#like#see that as an attack on you personally#thats a problem...you need to address that.
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doodlesketchgirl · 2 years
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Not me feeling like an outcast again at school 😁 idk I just wanna talk about it since no one cares if I vent my ig story
((Venting in the tags because I can't handle this anymore I just wanna fucking scream in my head))
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bunnihearted · 1 year
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forehead451 · 6 days
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stream of consciousness type deal.
#people's experiences of you will be so drastically different from what you're like when relaxing/unmasking at home and they'll be shocked#when you live together and you thought you let them see what you were like normally except most of the time theyve seen you at home its an#Occassion™ so ofc im gonna be alert and jumping around and talkative bc theres a lot happening and im really happy theyre there#and i can be still. but once they see me day after day exhausted and overstimulated its different bc i am different#i dont feel like i am but i am#and if they dont believe when you explain whats happening then shit hits the fan#for a while i did not understand why they were getting so mad at me at dinner#the other people there understand how i can be foggy or overstimulated and just need to eat and im happy to be there i just need to not look#at anyone or say much and im dizzy from working all day. i need to mash for a bit all ill be good. theyve been generous to take me as honest#when i tell them what im doing.#but a person who is not used to seeing me that way will start thinking im rolling my eyes at whats being said when im actually staring into#space or trying to refocus or trying to get my body to stay in itself instead of drifting off and they think im quietly judging and ik like#im so sorry but fr im not even listening to the group conversation and im not thinking anything negative about you im just gathering my body#i SWEAR. also its agreed that i take part in a group meal instead of isolating with my food bc i need to eat right now too#now that ive stopped working and im going to go back to working after this meal so. this is what i have to do. it is understood and you're#somewhat new to being here on a daily basis but I'm serious i just have to do this and im not being shady im just Something™#(aka exhausted/overstimulated/neurodivergent.) but when i get up with the gathered dishes without making eye contact im automatically angry#and im judgemental and manipulative and trying to control everyone's mood by making my problems everyone's problems with my sighing and eye#rolling. im like. again im not rolling my eyes im trying to focus my eyes. and im not sighing at whats being said im letting out the breath#i realized ive been holding bc im holding myself back from an anxiety rollercoaster drop bc im very overstimulated rn and i was asked to be#here to share meals and deal with it in front of everyone and you arent understanding that id be doing the same thing in private#nothing's WRONG im just OVERSTIMULATED RN and im pulling my body back and im not thinking anything about ANYONE in this room but im starting#to NOW bc you keep assigning meaning where ive told you repeatedly theres none and i get why you're interpreting it this way but i promise#thats not what im doing and your reasons for why im doing it are not accurate.
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berryberrytaeberry · 1 month
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I used to draw
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miesozernacma · 2 months
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how can one go about a friend breakup?
asking for a friend
#miesozernacma#theres this girl who initiated our friendship last year#around october maybe?#and weve been in a lik group of four since then#but ive realized were not very compatible as people#sure we may laugh together#but overall it seemed like the only reason we started talking was because she saw i drew genshin impact stuff during class#and 1) i dropped this game back in first grade of hs#and 2) i think this game sucks and i dont think she plays it that much now anyway#its not that we have completely different interests thats not even the main problem#ive built up like a grudge overtime about things that mildly irritate me in our everyday interactions#and i am literally uninterested in speaking to her By default because of these things.#i know damn well i cant drag this along forever because ill go insane and i actually genuinely dont want to talk to her because#of her quirks or whatnot#there are many things ive catalogued that push me away from her#from speaking habits to way of talking about things#to very short temper (gets audibly mad when i ask her to repeat because she speaks so quietly)#etc etc#if she had tumblr (and i Dont Know if she does) she might figure out it's her just based of the genshin#but anyway thats my semivent. im in a people pleasing pickle rn#so you could say#like i do not want to be around this girl because i have Such a problem with these certain things about her#and she would be grateful if i was upfront#but my ass doesn't want to deal with the negative reaction of having to Reject this person#Kicking Them Out of my everyday school life for the most part#._. if you read this far id appreciate ur thoughts
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somefisher · 4 months
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Im gonna throw up im sick of feeling awful all the time
#dont want this to become a vent accoutn but i dont like venting on servers 😭#anyway i cant tell whats wrong with me. i dont even know if this is even depression i think i just really hate myself guys#because ive been depressed my whole life and i know what that feels like? maybe its a different kind. i got depression v2.0#but what do i even do about hating myself . like how do i even fix that.#i get mad at myself for not doing anything and then i actually accomplish something and im like. you didnt do it well enough? hello#i think one of my biggest current problems is that i dont like anything. like nothing is enjoyable to me anymore enough to commit to it#but i dont have anything else to do right now so im just sitting around wasting away and starting things but not finishing them#like what am i supposed to do. im not unhappy all the time but nothing is fun im just existing#i was joking but maybe I actually did unlock depression 2#which is another problem because none of my mental illnesses have ever been treated in a helpful way in my entire life#and i have some kind of if not multiple undiagnosed neurodivergences definitely. but im scared to try and get them diagnosed#because the last time i did i got told it was anxiety (IT WAS NOT I DONT HAVE ANXIETY ANYMORE AND I STILL HAVE THE SAME PROBLEMS)#and i cant even get anything done because i need help to do anything!#i feel so useless i cant do anything on my own because i just dont care enough id rather just like. sit here and die i guess#like im not even close to being s******* i know what thats like and its so much worse. thats part of why i feel so bad im not even that SAD#i just dont care. i think ssris fucked up my brain can i be real#oughh whatever. rant over back to playing pokemon#vent#talking#can i get an emotion. please one spare emotion#reading all of this back i truly think i just need to be pit on stimulants. but how do i get there i dont even have a psych rn...
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