#and if they dont believe when you explain whats happening then shit hits the fan
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stream of consciousness type deal.
#people's experiences of you will be so drastically different from what you're like when relaxing/unmasking at home and they'll be shocked#when you live together and you thought you let them see what you were like normally except most of the time theyve seen you at home its an#Occassion™ so ofc im gonna be alert and jumping around and talkative bc theres a lot happening and im really happy theyre there#and i can be still. but once they see me day after day exhausted and overstimulated its different bc i am different#i dont feel like i am but i am#and if they dont believe when you explain whats happening then shit hits the fan#for a while i did not understand why they were getting so mad at me at dinner#the other people there understand how i can be foggy or overstimulated and just need to eat and im happy to be there i just need to not look#at anyone or say much and im dizzy from working all day. i need to mash for a bit all ill be good. theyve been generous to take me as honest#when i tell them what im doing.#but a person who is not used to seeing me that way will start thinking im rolling my eyes at whats being said when im actually staring into#space or trying to refocus or trying to get my body to stay in itself instead of drifting off and they think im quietly judging and ik like#im so sorry but fr im not even listening to the group conversation and im not thinking anything negative about you im just gathering my body#i SWEAR. also its agreed that i take part in a group meal instead of isolating with my food bc i need to eat right now too#now that ive stopped working and im going to go back to working after this meal so. this is what i have to do. it is understood and you're#somewhat new to being here on a daily basis but I'm serious i just have to do this and im not being shady im just Something™#(aka exhausted/overstimulated/neurodivergent.) but when i get up with the gathered dishes without making eye contact im automatically angry#and im judgemental and manipulative and trying to control everyone's mood by making my problems everyone's problems with my sighing and eye#rolling. im like. again im not rolling my eyes im trying to focus my eyes. and im not sighing at whats being said im letting out the breath#i realized ive been holding bc im holding myself back from an anxiety rollercoaster drop bc im very overstimulated rn and i was asked to be#here to share meals and deal with it in front of everyone and you arent understanding that id be doing the same thing in private#nothing's WRONG im just OVERSTIMULATED RN and im pulling my body back and im not thinking anything about ANYONE in this room but im starting#to NOW bc you keep assigning meaning where ive told you repeatedly theres none and i get why you're interpreting it this way but i promise#thats not what im doing and your reasons for why im doing it are not accurate.
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Rewatching that yt video of all of Doug’s scenes and I feel so bad for him
uh really long rambling under the cut lmao dont mind me
In the first scene he’s in, you can tell he just wants to be included, part of the conversation. He’s not sure how to join in, but he’s trying so hard, laughing at Clint’s ‘joke’, reacting to what others are saying, but from afar.
And all Wade has to do is say his name in that warning tone and Doug backs away so quickly without protest. They’ve done this before, multiple times. Doug knows he’s not fitting in, not quite getting it right. He’s trying so hard. Reading books to try to figure out what’s missing, putting himself out there. He says things he thinks other will agree with (I blame rap music), whether or not he actually believes them isn’t clear.
He tells his students about his (probably very stressful) weekend, but not his coworkers, because out of the two groups, only one of them will listen. They may not really get it, but they listen, and he can understand that feeling.
When the shit hits the fan, he’s still so unsure what to do. He puts a hand on Lucy’s side (going for assurance, maybe?) but removes it just as quickly, looking like he regrets it. He yells what he probably thinks is some kind of encouragement at Clint, wrestling with Patriot on the floor. He’s looking to everyone else for some sort of indication on what to do, but everyone’s panicking, so he’s panicking.
This is an unfounded headcanon but I think Doug usually does the whole exaggerated be quiet thing for his students and they think it’s funny, so he’s used to doing it that way and now it’s his default. (That or he has possible auditory hallucinations? Also an excuse to dunk on Rebekkah which is a good enough reason in my book lmao)
He risks his life to study Clint’s infection, and not only does nobody else react, but Wade outright says he doesn’t care. Not a single one of these people care that he puts himself at risk trying to help. And when he finally does return with his hypothesis, their main concern is that he did it all with his bare hands. As if that’s what’s important in the moment.
He’s used to it. That’s the worst part. He’s used to their indifference or dismissal. When he asks them to follow him so he can explain what he’s discovering, and nobody does, he just shrugs like he expected it and continues on with his observations.
I’m kind of surprised they didn’t just leave him there when he gets tackled by the kid, use him as a distraction while they escaped. Maybe they knew they’d need his knowledge, maybe they figured they needed all the hands they could get. Maybe they just acted without thinking, who knows.
And he’s so smart, and able to compartmentalize in a way that none of the others seem to be able to do. Yes, this is a child, a former student, that he’s dissecting (brain surgery with his bare hands???) but it’s necessary to understand what’s happening. He’s not trying to be a creep when he asks Tamra about hitting puberty, he’s gathering relevant data, and I’m willing to bet the more sinister implications of asking a child about her body never even crossed his mind in this situation. He’s a scientist.
And he’s still trying so hard. Trying to prove that he has things worth sharing with the group, trying to help them understand like he does, going into detail so they can get where he’s at. He sounds impatient when his knowledge gets questioned, so he gives context, but the spike incident isn’t relevant here, Rebekkah (dunking x2 combo)
When Lucy attempts to correct him, his response is ‘oh ok this is how i’ve seen people respond to this, anyway moving on’ (So he obviously doesn’t notice when the word switches happen, or at least not all the time)
Just about every time he tries to add onto a conversation he gets something wrong, and you can tell he knows it, but he keeps trying. (I’m not deep-diving into his bucket list comment lmao) During Wade’s hype speech, he doesn’t mean to take away from the momentum, he just knows Wade was factually incorrect.
Then he makes a fucking CATTLE PROD???? Fuck Tracy’s fork-studded safety cone, clever as it is, my mans made a CATTLE PROD. IN A CAVE. OUT OF SCRAPS. (ok, in a basement, out of batteries. close enough.)
And again with the compartmentalization- they’re not human, they’re no longer his students. They’re in the way between the group and survival. He does what he has to do, with less fear than he had when trying to make small talk. He’s even able to joke during the chaos. (I saved your life, nbd, just get me a sandwich and we’re even)
The next time he says ‘come here’, though, they do. And again, he’s trying, he’s confident that if he can just get his hands on some infected nuggets, he can keep being useful, he can help fix things. He’s still worth keeping around. He tries to lighten the mood, too- the mask, the pun. It’s just the wrong timing, and he knows he messed it up again.
But he’s trying.
#doug davis#cooties 2014#leigh whannell#if nobody will talk about it with me then by god i'll talk to myself about it
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note: i spent quite a bit of time rambling, and it truly is rambling, so i have not gone back and re-read any of this.
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you can hate someone all you want and say whatever you want about them, but to attack their appearance and a speech impediment is gross. idc who the fucker is. his appearance has nothing to do with his behavior and making fun of the way someone talks?? really?? not only does that also have nothing to do with his behavior, but a lot of people have speech impediments and he's not gonna see your ~jokes~ but they will
go after him for shit that's relevant. go after his actions
anyway
dude needs a psych eval, therapy, and anger management at the very least imo. he's never really hidden that he isn't mentally thriving, but there is a lot more going on up there than depression.
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as someone who can react aggressively, even violently, when frustrated enough or angry enough - and has said some awful shit in the moment that felt out of my control (there is no brain to mouth contact in that moment) - i know there is shit that can be done to help that. medications, therapy, learning redirection, knowing when to exit a situation before you hit that point, and other shit.
i've been struggling with this again lately as my mental health is shit, but it's still better than it used to be years ago, and i'm aware of it and what a problem it is. bc real talk: i did not think it was an issue. it was like "yeah i'm yelling and screaming and throwing things and breaking shit (not all at once, thank god) but so what?? that's just how i am". you can truly be so unaware of yourself and your own shit it's ridiculous
not saying he's got the same shit in his head but from personal experience i wouldn't rule it out entirely. there are a lot of mental illnesses out there and things that can get messed up in you. nothing excuses his behavior, but there could be an explanation.
once again: explaining =/= excusing
and if there is something genuinely fucked up (well..) then he can get help. people don't like to think about or consider it for some reason, but even people who do abhorrent things can get better and change (if they want to) not that that would make up for anything but it would keep a repeat from happening with someone else. and idk i believe there is good in almost everyone. he fucked up a helluva lot but i don't think he's this unsalvagable evil demon. he's a human being
okay yeah editing one thing in and that is that there could be something mentally at play, or medically, or he could just be an asshole that needs to learn and do better (i'm not ruling it out entirely) or it could be a combination deal. idk. i'm just not a big fan of calling someone a piece of shit with the tone that that IS who they are. the end. that they've always been a piece of shit and they always will be and there is no hope for them.
and maybe that's one of the reasons i'm being so unwell about this. because, top 10 anime betrayals aside, i've seen bits of myself in his videos prior to all of this blowing up - the good and the bad. i've seen a bit of the worst part of me in the clips of his aggression and threats. but despite what i feel and say when i've gotten like that in the past i never meant it outside of that moment. you calm down and you genuinely hate yourself because what the fuck was that shit and you feel embarrassed (and for me getting embarrassed usually manifests as anger) and it's just shit
i dont tend to develop parasocial attachments but in the span of like.. a month maybe here we fucking are i guess. it's not great, i'm not thrilled by it - especially now - but it really got me out of nowhere and bc i have attachment issues (there are many reasons i'm in therapy thanks) that's.. probably also part of the unwellness i've been feeling (i keep calling it "unwell" bc truly i do not have the words to describe it beyond that)
there are people who say they "got a vibe" or "never liked him" or whatever but could not be less me. he quickly became a comfort channel and there was nothing that tipped me off that anything was wrong. his channels spark(ed) joy (serious videos aside, but even then there was comfort in seeing someone get so passionate about things that mattered)
i enjoy him and his content, both solo and joint, and - saying this bc i've seen more than one comment on it - i like listening to him speak and i like watching him speak. his lisp is cute and he has a nice voice. his humor is great, the fashion and vibes were immaculate before whatever the fuck happened that ended up in him removing color from everything he owns. and growing that mustache situation
he's someone who is seriously not well, he did and said godawful trash shit, and he should face consequences. none of this post is me saying he should be forgiven with zero punishment. people shouldn't push it aside just because they're fans
this was not a victimless situation, nor was it a first time, from what some people have said
you can be a fan and admit when the person you're a fan of fucked up / did something awful. being a fan does not mean excusing their every word and action. a*ex is a person. a human being. not a demon but also not a god. and he should be treated as such. stop putting strangers on pedestals. i might be incredibly unwell about things but at least i never thought he was perfect or whatever. anyone can let you down at any time, be it content creators or actors or whatever, so please be careful and be at least a little sane about them)
i'm sure i have more to say about this but my brain really said "we've done enough with serious words for now" and i can't remember where i was going with this - if anywhere. maybe this was just supposed to be a rambling vent - which, if so, mission accomplished. i know it was triggered by people attacking a*ex for the wrong things, bc going after shit like a speech impediment is so low and so not relevant to the situation, and then i just got my feelings and thoughts everywhere. eugh.
i've watched a couple videos on the evidence (sound off w/ captions bc reading vile things is easier than hearing them) (i do the same thing with my voicemails tbh. i never listen to them, i read them. not bc they're vile but bc i just get less anxious if i don't have to hear it. idk) and while each covered the biggest things (so far anyway) i certainly am not going to claim to know it all. but there have been video clips, audio clips, screenshots across them all - each video having some of the same pieces but also pieces the others don't show or touch on. so.. i've seen.. enough.
i really need to disengage from all of this, and i sure would like to, i'd love to not be aware of this level of "drama" regarding someone i'm a fan of as it's breaking, but i can't go back in time and stop myself from clicking on his channel and i can't undo liking his videos so here i fucking am
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"he's cancelled!" bitch shut the fuck up. canceling isn't a real thing. look at anyone with a fanbase who has done bad shit. they still have a fanbase, they still do whatever.
"his career is over!" maybe, maybe not, i for one can't see the future but i wouldn't place bets that it is. because again: look at what people have been accused of, and have done, and even if they suffered real consequences for their actions they came back from it.
maybe focus on what genuine consequences there could be
OR - better yet - focus on showing support for the victim. yeah actually maybe lets do that. maybe care about a victim more than you hate their abuser. just tossing that thought out there as an option
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i keep thinking i've reached the end of what i have to say and then some part of me, the apparently country part that stormed out the saloon doors, comes slamming back through a moment later - cowboy hat waving wildly - with a yell of "AND ANOTHER THING-"
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on top of everything else - and i know this is going to sound so shitty and so immature - i do not like being told what to do. to like.. a really aggressive degree. it's one of the traits i got from my mom. if you tell me to stop watching something or stop listening to something, to do or not do something, you have almost guaranteed that i am going to do the exact opposite.
and tbh... if we cut off content from anyone who ever did bad things there would be like.. no content left. which might sound fine to you, you weird purity culture angel fucks, but i personally like to find relaxation and joy where i can get it. i personally like to enjoy life when i can. mostly because it isn't an easy thing for me to do, so if some band's music is a vibe or some guy posts random videos that make me smile or laugh then brother i am in. not necessarily on a personal level but then maybe yeah on a personal level. i don't know. i'm just saying words at this point. not that i don't mean them, but they're a bit of a mess.
i've been awake for over four hours
it is 7:52 AM
i don't know why i'm still trying to get my thoughts and feelings out.
maybe because i want those things to get across as clearly as they can. i don't want there to be a misunderstanding if it can be avoided. i want it to be understood (as much as it can be) why i think the way i do about all this and what i don't think about it all (like no, i don't think a*ex is innocent. do i think we have the full story?? i don't know. probably not. even with evidence we've only heard half directly, but he certainly did more than enough wrong and there should be consequences. real ones.)
all this and i still don't feel like i've gotten out everything i wanted to properly, which is whatever. i can make another rambling vent post later if i have to. i just hoped unloading all of this would make me feel a bit better, maybe a little less anxiety-induced nauseous, idk. it kind of worked i guess
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wildly oversimplified and comically surface-level tldr: i'm not an empath but i can be intensely empathetic, as well as intensely sympathetic, to my own detriment and my brother in christ has all of this really driven that home
wildly oversimplified and comically surface-level tldr 2.0: person who is multiple mental illnesses in a trenchcoat and feels Too Much affected by situation Too Much at least partially due to mental illnesses
#there is a tldr at the end#bc this is a very long rambling vent post and i dont expect anyone to read it anyway but if you want to be a bit#nosy you can check that out lmao#this gets personal but i feel like that's not surprising#also there's... nuance?? i guess?? like i don't 'extreme' the topic the way most people have bc truly i am just getting shit out of my head#and chest and doing so in my little online house bc my shit doesn't involve anyone else. certainly not strangers. i am not trying to change#anyone's mind. i am not interested in changing anyone's mind. i'm just sorting out my house. okie doke? okie doke#maison speaks
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how i deal with build ups of energy
to clarify what i mean real quick, anyone that knows me should know im a pretty spiritual kinda guy- i thoroughly believe in negative and positive energies and that both of them are weirdly physical despite falling under the metaphysical category
i also believe in old energy and new energy- it's kinda like water in a way yknow- u dont wanna drink old water bc who KNOWS what it's got in it, so you usually wanna flush it out and get new or clean water instead
now lemme explain why im yapping abt this
i just did a workout and at first i really couldnt get into it (for those who dont know, my method of exercise is literally putting my earbuds in, turning the lights off and performing my favorite songs as if i was the singer on stage in front of a crowd bc that's something i eventually want to Actually do), i did a couple songs and i just wasnt feeling it but i was like Well nah- nah this- this cant be 😧
bc i kinda had to do a workout today, i knew i needed it for some reason, so i was like Ok well let me try a song that almost always works (falling away from me by korn)
and i did it and for the most part i felt this kind of shell i was in start to crack- i started to get a little more energized throughout the whole song and im like Okay inch resting- and it was at that point i started to have a hunch about what this lack of energy was.
i did another song that i hadn't actually done before but knew that whenever i listened to it, i couldn't Not crank the volume every time the chorus hits- it's one of Those™ songs (and it's gravity of discomfort by korn)
right before the first chorus hit, i felt myself REALLY start to come out of whatever shitty shell i was in, but then something bit back into me and the chorus itself wasn't as good-
2nd chorus rolls around and i am FEELING it FINALLY- the breakdown hits and i have the moment where it fully clicks and i know what's wrong with me.
essentially what was happening was i was just full of too much old, shitty, stagnant energy- the kind of shit that when you let it fester, it makes you not want to do the very things that would get rid of it.
it was at this point that i finally started feeling correct again so i did a song that i just wanted to do in general (shoots and ladders), and then i followed it with the one song that is the most energy purging fucking thing i know of for myself (chi- these r all korn songs if u couldnt tell by now-)
this is the ONE SONG that, no matter what vibe im in, i will end up purging Something fucking huge energetically and the song will end and ill feel like a new man completely
if u follow my astrology blog, @twistedastrology, u shouldve seen the cancers and rage post i did bc this ties into it immensely 😮💨
this may have been the most insane ive ever gone to this song im not gona lie- i can almost guarantee you i scratched the shit out of my own skin because it's like having a parasite in you and you just start clawing at your own skin, desperate to get it out of you.
that and im a very physical person when it comes to purging shitty energy (again, the cancers and rage post will explain it 💔)
the experience with the song itself almost had me breaking down into tears, and if i wasnt so unbelievably angry, i probably would've-
i literally feel so much better now that i burnt that shit off bc now that i know abt it, i can definitely tell how it's been eating me up inside
but i wanna talk abt before i started getting into the swing of things vs after.
there was this very obvious apprehension that i talked abt, yknow not feeling into it- and then after i got rid of the garbage energy, i was sat on the floor in front of the fan just feeling So much better-
you're always gonna feel like shit before you purge something, it's like pulling teeth, right? the more you dont want to do it or dont feel like doing it, the more you actually need to.
it's that shitty energy's last line of defense, it's digging into you tooth and nail with every appendage it has, begging for you to not evict it from your body and mind because it has nowhere else to go.
think of it like leaving a shitty partner- you say you wanna end things and then they shit themselves and cry and scream and beg and punch walls and threaten to off themselves if you leave them because omg no!!!! nooooo not my energetic breakfast lunch and dinner!!!! nooooo dont leave me ur too sexy haha ur lifeforce is too fun to drain lol
Like bro.
my personal experience with these energy purges is usually the same every time, i catch onto it, get so pissed about it that i basically burn it from the inside out, and then i go to bed that day and wake up the next a whole new person.
i get way happier, better at listening and talking to the ppl around me, i have 10x more energy, i can sleep way better at night, etc.
and then eventually, something will find it's way back in and i have to repeat the cycle, but the only time repeating that cycle is a bad thing is when i fail to burn the shitty energy off and then become a conduit for all things miserable, which i personally refuse to let happen because it's my worst nightmare.
also update i just felt a vague stinging on my collarbone and im like oh shit whar- go to feel it and im like Holy shit that feels bad- check it out and ya i got a big ass scratch right there damn bitch calm down 💔💔💔 im surprised it's not actually bleeding ngl it looks like it's like 2 layers of skin away from it tho 😭😭😭
ANYWAY
i know it sucks and i know it's kinda shitty or silly to say, but a build up of negative energy is very similar to, the same as, and can even Lead To depression, anxiety, whatever.
im never gonna dismiss someone's mental health issues as "oh ur juet holdidng onto too much negative enebgryy Go hold some rocks!!!!!!!".
negative energy can play a part in it, and rocks can help with that part, but they wont magically cure your genuine mental illness and they should never be looked at like they will.
But for me, my mental illness is just exacerbated by said shitty energy, and that's what doing these ungodly purges fixes. sometimes you get shitty energy from just having a long day, sometimes people deliberately (mostly unknowingly tho) throw it onto you because they dont wanna deal with their own shit, sometimes you just get it from yourself.
the source of it doesn't matter as much as the expulsion of it.
and for me, after i expel such an intense amount as i just did, i get SUPER tired, sometimes i even get a temporary but god awful migraine-
at one point i genuinely cleared out so much old energy at once that i kept getting more and more tired to the point of keeling over and knocking out a couple times and waking up with the migraine of a lifetime, AND my ENTIRE body was RUTHLESSLY sore- but i kept going because i wanted all of it out as fast as possible.
i didnt wanna just slowly sift through it no no i HAD to do it as fast as my body would let me, there was no other choice in my head because that's just not how i work.
so while i may sorta fuck myself up with how Quickly and violently i expel this kinda stuff, it's never not for a good reason. i can handle a couple scratches on my body, i can handle a head-splitting migraine, i can handle my whole body feeling like it's gonna fall apart as long as i get the shit out of my system.
with time, my body will heal on it's own, but my mind will spiral if i dont keep it in check.
and i think with that im gona end this yapping session- idk if any of this made any modicum of sense but i hope that if it did, u took Something positive from it.
if u actually read this far legitimately god bless u and there will be plenty more yapping sessions 2 come
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Capts Log No.43_ VoyeurMe
IM SO FUCKING PISSED I WAS LITERALLY AT THE END OF WRITING THIS AND THEN WHYTF DID I ACCIDENTALLY DELETE THE WHOLE FUCKING THING IT WAS PERFECT! DAMN SHADOW RX IM CRYING INSIDE.
UGH. Idc im so stubborn I will fucking do it fucking again it will fucking be better than the last time bitch. So what I was saying, DISCLAIMER THIS BLOG FOR MATURE AUDIENCES. If you my pops you def cant reaad this lmao. Consider this the lock on my diary. I wasnt going to tell this story, then that shit that just happened made me feel like I DEF shouldnt tell the story but I love the quote I was literally just tryna add a quote at the end and fucked it all up... whatever whatever.
From time to time I go to this place called Social Island. Its nice place for ppl watching, if you are observant like me.. I love to observe nature, the stars, people, and SL residents! The profiles, expressions, avatars, its always something new and different to see and people from all over are just right at your fingertips. You can learn about their country, customs, whats going on present moment the things the news won't tell you. Its a trip. Yea thats the internet but SL is the whole experience of it, and IYKYK! Theres also of course the occasional debauchery of trolls, loud ass music players and sexual harassers.
So one day I see HELLBOY. *swoons* Like- I can't explain how or why folks, ,but I got so hrny seeing this avatar lmao. Sexy af to me. I was just like, lemme get my tredente waaataaa cuz why am I so thirsty all of a sudden this is unnacceptable!!! But then I look at the profile..
No text. No description. No picture of their avi, just a glitched out looking Skullhead. lol. Idk I have always had a thing for beastly characters. Like the beast from beauty and the beast was one of the first fictional characters i was attracted to lmao.
So I see my RL birthday is the dudes REZ day. Cant make this shit up guyss, I was looking at something on facebook, a sl couple that had this exact situation that were like celebrating something and I was like oh shit that so cool/cute. Next day this shit happens! Okay and then peep the days, 4440. lol .... We talked for about 6 hours.
About deep shit like spirituality, past lives, the usual thing I go on about.. but this dude was skeptic, intelligent. Non-believer. I should have clocked at some point how much he didnt believe in shit but it is nice to talk to people who do not believe in what you do and are still open-minded to hear you out. So that was cool.
I hate how happy we look in that pic on the left lmao because no, this does not end well! The last thing I gotta say haha because after all this is VoyeuristicVixen I cant not ... He had a lot of forms and one of them was VENOM. *sticks tongue out* Have you ever been ate out by Venom? I- lemme just stop there lmao *sips tea* Press play & cont: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MWWrEMPLQog
He visited my crib in Jamrock, he even joined mystory lol.
So on his 4444th day, all hit the fan. I decided to have the talk that you know I dont want anything serious, I am still going through healing from a divorce yadda yadda. And it was a great day to do it because 4 represents foundations... four fours is like ultimate foundational energy.
I dont wanna really date on SL or RL at all right now, If anything I want to demo what open relationship situation would be like to see if that is something for me. SL is a great place to test what you are comfortable with in a safe way. Especially with BSDM matters but thats for another blog. So anyways I am telling him about 4444 from my favorite source, and how excited I was for that day for him.. Remember the dude a skeptic.
Long story short, I gauged something that he was doing and called him out on it. When I ended up being right I joked like yea cuz im psychic which is true but i was being vibey.. lol he ends up revealing some prejudices he had against brown people calling themselves psychic. He from India, brown too. But that dont make a difference. People can still be programmed against their own. I was a fun four day fling and I do not regret a thing!
The main lesson I was tryna quote myself on in the last version of this blog lmao was that not every sign or symbol needs to be acted upon. Not everything you attract is worth your time. This world is literally made of constant synchronicities and patterns of numbers and instances. If you really look closely you will see it all.. Everything really is that deep dont get me wrong.
"you dont have to look down to gather water from the well." -FOXEY HENDRIX
i am currently obsessed with this new Alchemy viewer, it does need a few things like a better flycam system for controller and also the ability to pose like the BD "poser" tool & OMG *chefs kiss*
Ive been going EVERYWHERE, like-
Mentoring has been a trip also, its really fun to observe how people go about their first moments on the grid. Last night had someone almost give up till we talked them off the ledge XD For me it was always easy and intuitive to pick up SL was not too hard. But a lot of people just want to start experiencing and connecting and dont care for the technical stuff! It really means a lot to me to be able to make things easier for folks so they have a chance to enjoy the things we all enjoy about Secondlife.
Lmao people will literally be naked all the time but not even their fault they just get stuck trying to change. There are changing rooms, but people dont usually bother to walk to them even if we offer to take them there. I usually just direct them to where they can switch the default avatar so they find clothes quicker.
But omg, this one person kept switching into all kind of random forms that were highly disproportionate you can kinda see ... and then this female had a random bt plug just chillen there. THEY DONT SPEAK. which is the funniest part becacuse you cant tell what the hell is going on. They just start doing weird things to simulate "the act" XD im like " yes we love all expressions here on sl and there are designated places for that! " & they actually do listen to me. Sometimes my fellow mentors will freak out at trolls, and im like.. trolls? my specialty!
exhibit a. the OG trolls of SL used to grieve regions like this, falling d*ck orbs idek what to call them but i remember this day like it was yesterday, i was shopping for clothes at this cute korean place, back then there was a lot more asian creators for mesh clothes .. and suddenly the sky changed i kid you not. Also i think something about the sounds changed too like there was sirens, something that made me walk outside the building, then it was raining d*cks !!! ROFL. I miss when trolls were super original like this... ive also heard some other great griefer stories, I want to find the infamous bomb case.. apparently there was once a case that would basically make everyone in the room crash lol. But I think the servers are built against that very well now.. (not me talking about SL terr*sm) I have no inention to use these things it would just be great to meet someone who knows about those times XD I have to put these * by every word because I dont wanna get fl*ggd lmao. OKAY IM DONE TILL NEXT TIME!!
Shout out to these WelcomHub cutiess <3 Heather is always in something fly shes the dopest!
#secondlife#secondlifeblog#secondlifephotography#secondlifeblogger#secondlifefashion#ladyfoxeyhendrix#secondliferp#metaverse#blackgirlbloggers
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no taking back
summary: it was only fun and games. but steve had other plans.
warnings: modern au, tooth-rotting fluff i guess, little but of swearing
+ olivia rodrigo’s sour album (stream besties), the movie tangled at the end because it just radiates as a comfort movie
yes a modern au !!! i just saw this on tiktok (the sour part, but the rest was my idea!) and thought it was so cute so it gave me an idea to make it as a fic, enjoy !!!
steve harrington x fem!reader
olivia rodrigo’s new album just released and you were thrilled to listen to it and stream it the whole day.
when you finally got to listen to it, you asked your friends—robin, nancy, and the party, if they listened to it and which ones were their favorites.
robin told you that her top three were hope ur ok, jealousy, jealousy, and brutal.
nancy said she really loved favorite crime.
max said hers was also brutal.
el told you that she played good 4 u and traitor on repeat that hopper had to go into her room to turn it down.
when mike comes over to the cabin he can assure that el does indeed play them on repeat and get pissy about it (but he secretly loves the album, but he wouldn’t let her or anyone know that).
and lastly lucas and dustin are fans of deja vu and 1 step forward 3 steps back. max even told you that they would sing the bridge of deja vu on the top of their lungs.
you slightly laughed at the memory of them telling you about it.
however, there’s one more person that you haven’t talked to about it yet.
steve.
your smile faltered and faded when he came across in your mind.
your feelings for him had deepened over the time and listening to the sour album made it feel like you two had broken up, which in fact, is not true because you were never together in the first place.
suddenly, an idea popped in your head. instead of being sad about steve, you thought about texting him, although it’s almost 1AM, you knew he’d still be up.
Sailor Man
You: hey
You: u up?
Sailor Man: duh
Sailor Man: this has been our nightly routine u always bother me when i’m about to go to sleep
You: fuck off
You: don’t pretend that you’re not binge watching outer banks until 4am
Sailor Man: i’m not?!?
You: yeah right
You: anyways
You: can u do me a favor
Sailor Man: will i get free pizza afterwards
You: no
Sailor Man: k
You: what the fuck
You: fine
Sailor Man: hehe
Sailor Man: what’s the favor ;)
You: dont get me started with that winky face i swear ure so dead when i see you at the wheeler’s house tomorrow
You: have you listened to olivia rodrigo’s new album
Sailor Man: ohh the bitter album?
You: ITS SOUR DUMBASS
Sailor Man: I DONT KNOW?!?
You: I CANT DO THIS HJAGSK
Sailor Man: shut up
Sailor Man: i’ve heard some of the songs but i haven’t fully listened to them
Sailor Man: why
You: can you like
You: ask me to be ur girlfriend then break up with me right after so i can experience and actually feel the whole sour album
Sailor Man: what
You: just do it !!
Sailor Man: you’re so funny (y/n/n)
Sailor Man: okay
Sailor Man: will you be my girlfriend?
You: yes !!!
You: ...
You: hello
You: dont tell me u fell asleep
Sailor Man: i’m not doing the last part you might as well forget about it
You: wjat
Sailor Man: :D
You: wtf
You: okay steve cut it out i’m not doing this anymore u’re not funny
Sailor Man: nope
Sailor Man: go to sleep we’re dating now that’s how this works
Sailor Man: okay i dont know if you’re still reading this now and i am terrified to say this to you in person like TERRIFIED. might piss my pants if i did. so (y/n/n), my favorite dumbass, my favorite person to talk to at night even if it interrupts my binge watching marathon, you make me so happy to the point that even when i sleep you’re still in my dreams. i like you. i have like the biggest fattest crush on you. and thank you for doing that sour album thing or whatever, because of that i get to finally ask you out
you rolled on your back after you read the message, facing the ceiling as your mind processed what just happened. was he playing with you? was he actually serious about asking you out?
Incoming video call...
Sailor Man
you took a deep breath before tapping the green button and placing it back down on the bed.
“hey,” you can tell that he was tired based on his voice. “can you show your face, please? i miss you.”
ignoring the butterflies in your stomach, you hesitantly lifted the phone and shifted your position to lay on your side. “hey.”
“hey yourself.” steve grins. that stupid grin that makes your stomach turn, that grin you always want to see everyday.
“what’s..up?” you avoided looking at him and started to admire your surroundings and the posters placed on your wall. this was the only time you were glad you weren’t with him in person.
“i just wanted to see if you’re okay.” of course he will ask that. he's steve. he cares about other more than himself.
“i am, thanks.” you showed a smile that doesn't reach your ears and steve knew something was bothering you. “hey, look. i'm sorry about my confession- if it made you uncomfortable i'm sorry-”
“no,” you cut him off, looking back at his face on the screen. “i’m fine, really. you don't have to apologize. i was just, surprised.”
there was silence between the two of you for a few seconds, before you spoke again. “did you mean it?” you voice was only above whisper but steve managed to hear them. “of course,” he answered almost too quick, without any hesitation. “i've been trying to find the perfect opportunity and had been asking god for signs because i can't make a move myself-”
“asking god?” you chuckled and steve smiled hearing them, glad that he somehow lightened the mood. “well, more like begging.” he continues and you giggled.
once your laughter died you both fell into silence again. you still couldn’t believe that out of a fun joke, it would turn into a whole another situation. “so, um.. just so you know, i’m not mad, or upset, or anything. i really was just surprised. it felt like a dream because i didn’t know that you like me back and all i did was just supposed to be a fun joke but—”
“hold on, back?”
“what?”
“like you back. you said i like you back.” steve sat up on his bed and fixed his hair as his eyes widened. “i did...” you said slowly, not catching up.
“does that mean you..”
then it hit you. “oh, right. yeah. i- i like you..too.” you waited for his reaction and once you saw him smile you couldn’t stop yourself from doing the same.
“i knew it. and well, i guess that confirms it. we’re dating now. no taking back.” he smirks then laughs when your rolled your eyes. “don’t flatter yourself, harrington. i did not say shit.” you pointed your index finger on the screen, barely containing your giggles.
“based on your beautiful smile i think you don’t need to say it. i like you, and you like me. we’re dating.” steve gives you a teasing smile. you tried keeping your serious face but it won’t last longer so you finally smiled again. “alright, fine. no taking backs. we’re dating.” you said then laughed as he whisper-yelled ‘yes!’ while fist pumping the air.
he soon joined your laughter and you stayed like that until your jaw was pretty much in pain because of your smiles. when it was all quiet again, you both just admired each other’s presence through the screens of your phones. “i wish i was there with you.” he mumbles. “yeah, me too.” you hugged your cold pillow beside you, closing your eyes for a moment and imagining it as steve.
“are your parents home?”
you snorted at his random question. “i’m actually alone right now, they’re out because dad got promoted at his work so he and mom and i think a few friends went out to celebrate. they should be home by an hour or two. why?”
“nothing.” was all he said before hanging up. you were left confused but then he’s your best friend after all, so you knew right then and there that he’ll do something stupid. after you turned your phone off you suddenly felt watching a movie so you went to the kitchen to make some popcorn.
when it was finished and had been put in a bowl, that’s when you heard your doorbell rang—in a pattern which you recognize, and only one person does that.
you let out a quiet laugh when you realized who it was and set the bowl on the counter before opening the door.
“hi!” steve greeted you with a smile. “uh, hi?” you laughed nervously and stepped aside for him to go in. “i smell popcorn, are we having a movie night?” he says as he steps inside and shrugged off his jacket. “actually yeah, i’m planning on watching—”
“tangled.” he finishes off, you subconsciously smiled upon hearing your favorite movie. “how’d you know?”
steve snatches a few popcorns from the bowl as you both arrived in the kitchen. “(y/n), you have watched that movie 7 times this week and always gush to me about it.”
“well, you’re the only one that is around my age that i can talk to with that movie. robin and nancy aren’t that into it.” you replied, grabbing the bowl and making your way back to your bedroom, steve following your heels. “and you think i’m the best option to talk to about that?” he asks, plopping down on your bed and resting his back on the headboard.
“you’re not complaining.” you shrugged as you grabbed your laptop and sat beside steve.
“yeah, probably because i like you.” it came out of his mouth casually. you froze in place and felt your cheeks heat up, finally nodding your head slowly, “..probably.” as you typed in the movie in your laptop you felt steve scoot closer, making your breath hitch.
you were both in a comfortable silence while watching the movie, except for a few jokes and comments that steve makes and him explaining how similar he was to flynn rider.
“you know, since i’m eugene, you could be rapunzel.” he suddenly says. you eyes were still on the screen but your eyebrows furrowed. “why? i’m nothing like her.”
finally looking at steve, you almost screamed how he was already looking at you. “oh, you are so rapunzel. you may not have the longest hair in the world, but you are pretty much similar.” he replies, smiling and not taking his eyes off of you.
you paused the movie and shifted your body towards him, intrigued by his explaination. “how so?”
“well, first off,” steve starts, resting his hands on the soft mattress. “you’re both sweet, you’re both a huge ray of sunshine, have gorgeous eyes and smile, and eugene is head over heels over you — and since he doesn’t exist in real life, i’d like to be the substitute.” he finished with a confident smile.
after about three seconds, you burst out of laughter. you laughed. as much as he loves the sound of your laugh, he can’t help but pout. “(y/n), i’m trying to be sweet here!”
“i’m sorry!- it’s just- i can’t help but laugh at your flirting.” you managed to say between your laughs. you know he’s kidding but he looked at you like he was offended.
your laughter died down and held steve’s face. “it’s cute, sorry.” you mumble with a little laugh. when he finally smiled you turned to your laptop and continued the movie.
steve gazes at you for a few more seconds before watching the movie with you again. “thank you.” you whisper, glancing at him.
“you’re very much welcome, my rapunzel.” he says smiling before he slides a bit down on the bed so his head could reach your shoulder and rests it there.
you giggled as you heard him whisper,
“thank you, olivia rodrigo.”
#steve harrington#stranger things#steve harrington fluff#fluff#imagines#stranger things imagine#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#stranger things fic#cute fic#i hope you enjoyed help#fluff fic#steve harrington x reader imagine#sour#sour olivia rodrigo#tangled
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Thanks for the submission @beatlesfan4765 - I really love this ❤️
*****
Time period- 64-65
Shipping-Mclennon
TW- i dont think there is any
Rating-pg
This is my first fan fic/slash fic so please dont be too harsh
You should go home-
It was a typical day at the studio, everyone noticed that paul was a bit off- He wasnt as energetic as he usually is and is being rather quiet.
"Are you doing okay?" John asked across the room genuinely concerned for his best mate.
"Yeah im good johnny just a bit tired"he reponded.
With that they continued their set when paul starting having a major coughing fit in which he coved up and blamed his cigarette and with a skeptical thoughts john believed him.
As they continue paul was finding it harder to hide the fact he felt like absolutely shit. It was seeming to be every 30 seconds that he trying to hide a cough but it was the constant struggle to hide the chills and the overwhelming nausea that is occurring and keeps getting worse. All he wanted was to be home but due to the fact the others are already worried for him he desied against it
It came to the point that it was getting harder and harder to watch the younger man sit in misery, so John finally walks over to paul and sits nexts to him on an amp.
"Bloody hell luv your burring up," john said wile he placed the back of his hand against Paul's forehead.
"You really should go home you need to rest" john said with worrie in his voice
"Johnny i told you im oka-" then with that he blacked out in the middle of the room.
"Holly shit Maka!" john says a bit too lould rushing to his side.
"Oww" paul moned his head hitting the wood floor a bit to hard "Can you stop yelling"
"Im gonna take you home now" john said in soothing voice just above a whisper.
Paul, too weak to argue just gave a small nod
Paul dosen't remeber much due to the fact he was in and out of concensus all through the ride home.
All he could recall was waking up on his couch with a cool cloth on his head and covered up in a fluffy blanket and john by his side,sitting on the ground with his back against the couch with the tv on a low volume but even with that his attention was still focused on the ill bassist next to him.
"John?" Paul said weakly with confusion in his voice."what happened?"
John's head snapped up like he was finally revleaved his best mate is finally awake
"you passed out over at the studio so i took you back here and you where out for 2 hours" John explained softly still consumed with worrie.
"Im sorry" paul said his voice low "i didn't mean to make you worried and im sorry tha-"
"You have no reason to be sorry hun." John said with a nursing tone to his voice.
"But i-" paul tried to intervene
"No buts dear, your sick and its more than my pleasure to take care of you,Now sit up, not to fast though" john insisted now taking his nurse role a bit more seriously.
Paul did as he was told finding this side of john to be kinda charming.
"Yes mom" paul sarcastically remorse."would you also like me to do my homework too?"
"Its nice to know that your still an arse even when your ill" john responded wile fluffing his pillow and rearranging the blankets.
"Now, have you eaten anything today?"
Paul just stayed quiet like a young child geting in trouble.
"I figured, i know you dont have an appetite right now but you realy need to eat something. How about some chicken soup and crackers for my sick boy" john asked now really sounding more like a mother than a nurse.
"That sounds nice" paul responded with a hint of gratitude in his response.
"okay I'll be right back luv" john said while he got up making his way to the kitchen.
About 15 minutes have pasted and paul was starting to miss johns presence so he starts to get up. Wile he was getting up though, John walks back in the room. He puts the fresh tea and soup on the table and helps paul sit back down
"Why where you getting up luv" john questioned
"I..well um.. i missed you" paul admitted.
"Aww its okay paulie im here now, open wide" john said wile he held a spoonful of soup.
"Hey john" paul said almost sounding like a child.
"Yeah?"
"Thank you"
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You asked for it: live thoughts from Ria and @creatrixanimi watching RvB Zero.
So, after having a movie night the day before (third movie night in a week, actually, we are very productive) watching Neil Breen movies and “Cool Cat”, it was now time to touch upon Zero. Sadly, Zero does not belong in the “so bad it’s good” category, but alas, Ria had to spoil Haley’s innocence.
This is not a proper edited review, but just snippets of our live reaction while watching the thing together. We are not drunk, but this continued way past midnight for Ria, so maybe her brain isn’t fully functioning. Also, Ria is a potty mouth because cursing is easy when it’s not your native language. Enjoy.
Episode 1:
Ria: I can’t figure out if they were trying to do a Grif and Simmons parallel with those two random guards talking outside, the ones with the Wash retconning.
Haley: Their armor doesn’t cover their noses.
Ria: That’s gotta be cold. Frostbitten noses.
...
Haley: There is no exposition. Like, it feels like the writers had their idea and know what is going on, but we don’t so it just feels weird and random. It feels like a Marvel movie.
Ria: Is that a compliment? I haven’t watched Marvel.
Haley: Not a good one.
...
Ria: This episode isn’t that bad in itself. But it’s just there to establish that the OG characters can’t beat this new villain, but the new guys can, and, urgh.
...
Episode 2:
[The shot focuses on One’s behind.]
Ria’s dirty mind: Ass.
...
Ria: STOP CALLING HIM DAVID.
...
Ria: I like this character, but I don’t remember his name.
Haley: Raymond.
Ria: This is why we need a name system like with the Freelancers and states. Should’ve just been numbers all the way through. Except Eleven, you fucking whore.
...
Haley at the sight of Raymond’s phone: It’s so big.
Ria: It’s the future. I can believe it.
...
Ria: Here’s the thing driving me crazy. Axel is a normal name in Denmark. But like, only old people use it. I know two Axels and they are both older than eighty. So that’s when I think of when I see Axel.
...
[After the whole training montage where we are introduced to the characters, we are still confused.]
Ria: I can’t remember their names.
Haley: Well, they didn’t show all of them. They didn’t show One.
Ria: They did!
Haley: They did?
Ria: Wow. So we got all that tell and no show, and we are still confused.
...
Haley: When it comes to genre, it’s actually not that bad with the narrated tell and don’t show. If it wanted to be a cheesy/bad action movie, that’s a trope that’s used relatively frequently in the genre. It’s a bad action movie. But it’s not RvB. It’s kinda like a particularly bad Marvel movie.
Ria: You’re really not selling me on the Marvel movies tonight.
...
Ria: I know I’m just a sucker for Joe, but I keep thinking of s15. Like, here they just use the files as a cheap way to introduce the characters. But like, in s15, Dylan just read out loud Grif’s file, and it was not to introduce him, but like, to show the complexity of the characters and go against the files? I don’t know, it just seems way cooler now.
...
[After the whole “what’s East’s deal” scene, we were so confused. Literally paused for five minutes trying to figure who was whose dad and why and what. How many daughters did Axel have? And where are they? We were just lost. Future Haley: Him waxing poetic about his daughters while watching the two girls in his team train confused me like I thought he was talking about East and One and couldn’t count sdfghjk. Future Ria: I’d even watched the show before and I was still confused.]
Ria: I can’t figure out if they’re too fast or if we’re just stupid.
Haley: It’s like I’m trying to remember the details but it all slips through my fingers.
Ria: The whole Zero experience is to feel too old for this shit.
...
Ria: STOP FUCKING CALLING HIM DAVID
...
One: This is how it’s done, grandma.
Ria: Fuck you.
...
Episode 3:
Haley: People would like it if they love dumb action shows. It works as a mindless action show.
...
Haley: So this is a temple?
Ria: I hate the worldbuilding. Is this the same planet as before? Like, Chorus had temples, but it also had lore about it. Is this the same sort of temples?
Haley: So shouldn’t this temple have its own key? Why do they need to include Tucker? It makes no sense for the temple to require a totally different sword from a different planet.
Ria: So they could beat him up ‘cause OG characters are weak now.
...
Haley: I don’t like the training scenes. They are so long and boring.
Ria: This is like the third episode where they are training. Holy shit.
...
Haley: It’s not that bad. But if you like Red vs. Blue, it’s not something for you. They aren’t really comparable.
Ria: I just don’t understand what they wanted to continue for Red vs. Blue. Like, it’s not the worldbuilding or the plot or the characters. I just don’t get it.
...
Haley: Raymond is the best character.
Ria: I like Raymond.
Haley: He’s RvB. He should be the main character.
...
Ria: Did East just use the “I’m not like the other (girls)” line?
Haley: I don’t like her. She’s a brat. Why did Carolina have to apologize? They were just training, this is something she’s gonna have to deal with on a daily basis lmao.
Ria: Didn’t Carolina have a cast on her arm? It’s gone now. I can’t keep up with the timeline. So, she’s healed, but how long was Wash gone? They are so vague about everything. Worldbuilding, timeline, motivations.
...
Ria: …Did Carolina just say she’d suit up? While wearing a full armor suit?
...
[And this is where the cursed part takes place. To talk, we’d often pause the thing. Here, I randomly paused during the introduction for Starlight Laboratories. There’s a desk in the shot. With a fucking marker on it.]
Haley: That’s a Crayola marker. That’s a Crayola marker on the table.
Ria: Glad we can appreciate the details by pausing.
[Haley then missed the entire Axel flashback scene because she was too busy looking up pictures of Crayola markers. When this is revealed, Ria lost it for like, three minutes]
Haley: I had that marker as a kid.
Ria: So 4/5 stars for the marker?
Haley: They were supposed to smell like blueberries or something but they just smelled like chemicals.
Ria: This is the most excited we’ve been about Zero so far.
[Future Haley: I was literally laugh-crying you dont understand. This was the best part of the show.]
...
Episode 4:
Ria: They all have super powers. It’s so weird.
Haley: I keep thinking they are gonna explain stuff. But they don’t. So I’m just confused.
...
[Haley has now brought forth all the markers in her room to find a Crayola one. She drops them all on the floor. Ria loses it again.] [Future Haley update: I found a yellow one it smells like lemons :)]
...
Ria: They are all glowing and have super powers. It’s weird. Like, I know we had super powered armor before but that was all connected to AIs. I don’t get how all of this works. They don’t have AIs.
...
[We both agree that we enjoy Raymond and Tiny. Bless them.]
...
Ria: It’s weird. The dialogue is so oblivious, it comments on its own mistakes. Like, Carolina just acknowledged Wash has had a computer in his head before. But they don’t acknowledge the whole canonical lore about his trauma regarding computers in his head and why he’d hate this. Same with the name David. They just noticed that it’s his first name and that’s how they’d show how close Carolina is with him, but they didn’t acknowledge the canon lore that Wash dislikes people using his first name.
...
Episode 5:
Haley: Why didn’t they use Locus’ sword instead. It’d make more sense. He’s the one travelling around planets and wanting to help people??
Ria: What’s the worldbuilding here? Is Tucker on the same planet? Is this Earth? Chorus?
...
Haley: Gotta love it when they make Tucker hit on teenagers.
Ria: Oh god why did they make East 18.
...
Haley: They should have done something with the Warthog song, even if that’s a Red Team thing.
Ria: I miss Red Team.
...
Ria: Wait, so if these three swords are connected, why can the two first ones move by themselves and they have like super powers connected to them? When Tucker’s sword is just boring? They didn’t even make a joke about how the two new swords are longer than Tucker’s.
...
Tucker: I’m fine, I have my sword.
Ria: That line is so tragic in hindsight.
...
One: It’s Tucker. He is dead.
Carolina: Oh my god.
Haley: *laughs her ass off*
...
Haley: I don’t understand why anyone is doing anything.
Ria: Your brain is still thinking about that fucking marker.
...
Episode 6:
Ria: The dialogue did it again! Wash just said “amazing medical tech”. Like, he points out a plot hole. Because that amazing tech can heal brain injuries and bring people back from death, but East had to be tortured for years to heal her vague illness? Like, why couldn’t their amazing tech fix that.
...
[While watching the design of the temple.]
Ria: It looks like those are just plates glued to the wall. Dinner is served.
...
Haley: There is no logical reason why they brought in Tucker. His sword isn’t even from this planet.
Ria: To lure in fans.
...
Haley in a very sad voice: The speech wasn’t good.
...
Episode 7:
Ria: Is all of this happening on the same planet? They keep driving. The worldbuilding is so weird. At least earlier RvB made a joke about how they could just drive everywhere. This is like a big desert, a training base, laboratory, city and temples and Tucker’s workplace, and I don’t know if it’s even on the same planet.
...
Ria: Diesel is just standing there waiting while they outfit Carolina.
Haley: It’s like a video game.
...
Ria: The temple’s walls are filled with runes.
Haley: It feels like a free/bought asset. It doesn’t even look like the temples on Chorus. It looks like something in WoW or something like that.
Ria: It’s driving me mad. I can read runes! Imagine a big boss fight and the freaking alphabet is plastered on the walls. That’s what I’m looking at.
...
Haley: Zero is such a boring villain. It’s not interesting when we don’t know what this “power” actually is or what he wants to do with it.
...
Ria: That’s the helmet Spencer wore.
Haley: Oh god I forgot about him.
Ria: So did the writers.
Haley: Spencer should have been the real villain.
...
Haley: *sees the random model of the temple guardian alien* I miss Santa.
...
Episode 8:
Ria: The aliens are just dancing in the background while Carolina is fighting Diesel.
Haley laughing: Oh my god, they are. They are just jumping up and down.
...
Ria: So, the villain just turned overpowered, and the solution is that Raymond just flicks a switch we haven’t heard about and now the heroes are overpowered too?
Haley: It just makes them shiny. And like... they don’t even use the “power”, they don’t fight him with their powers which only some of them have, they just shoot their ordinary guns at him while doing unnecessary flips.
Ria: I just remembered Church’s dick switch. That had more dramatic buildup.
...
Axel: You’re too cocky for that.
Ria’s dirty brain: Cock.
...
Post Zero thoughts:
[Ria returns from bathroom break and Haley is proudly showing off her marker over video cam.]
Haley: There was too much going on so I just focused on the marker.
Ria: So how many stars would you give it?
Haley: It’s really bad.
Ria: How many stars for marker representation?
Haley: Three out of five. It was only there for a second.
...
Haley: In the beginning, it wasn’t that bad. It was dumb, but also fun and sorta cool. But then it just went on for too long and they didn’t explain anything properly and it stopped being fun really fast. But I can see why some people might enjoy it. Like, you’d love it for its action but only that. Not for plot and/or the character writing.
Ria: I think my biggest problem is the worldbuilding. They kept everything so vague because they didn’t want to connect, not really. Like, where is this happening? When? Why are Carolina and Wash there? Like, the motivations for all the characters were so vague as well.
...
Haley: Raymond was great. He had personality and some good lines. And he felt like RvB. Like, he used his brain and actually got shit done, but he also wasn’t over-powered. He followed a similar character arc to what the Reds and Blues had. He sucks at fighting but he’s efficient and smart in a practical way with his rocket launcher. He does the most and he doesn’t stop being a goofball! Even Zero was focused on stopping him the most at the end. And he didn’t need to do any stupid flips.
...
Haley: The borrowed assets annoyed me. It ended up looking stupid, like, the temple felt more like fantasy than science fiction. And nothing like Chorus. And normally, RvB doesn’t have to worry about being cohesive because all of the designs are from Halo so it all makes sense and it’s connected. But this is just so random it feels distracting, I feel like this is a big reason people felt that Zero was so jarring… but on a subconscious level. It just felt off and there was no cohesive design. Also everything looked like it was made for video games and not modified at all for the show.
...
Haley: Honestly I was optimistic at first but then I got confused really fast and it kept getting worse because it was so fast. They didn’t explain stuff properly or at all. Like, they made it too big. Should have been smaller. I thought going with the “Starlight Labs is evil and needs to go down” plot would have been A LOT better and would have tied together multiple aspects of the story that the temple plot didn’t.
Ria: If I had the power which I don’t, I dunno, but I if the main point was to introduce new characters, I’d keep them tied to lore and worldbuilding we already know. So we don’t get so confused and it doesn’t feel so disconnected. Like, I’m still in love with the idea that it should have been Carolina on Chorus dealing with these soldiers who have been fighting all their lives and now don’t have to do that anymore. But maybe Chorus still needing an army, and that’s why she is training it. I don’t know, but like, familiar, build on what we know. And then they wouldn’t be superpowered, but like, just competent-ish but normal soldiers and we’d get to know them better, but I just think Zero just wanted them to be these super cool soldiers even better than Carolina so they could pull off all the fight scenes. ‘Cause it’s all Zero has going for it. The fight scenes. It’s its strength and weakness ‘cause they sacrificed everything else to look cool. And it does. But it’s boring and there is nothing else going on.
...
Ria: I’m still so annoyed about the temples. Why are they there? Like, on Chorus it was a big thing, also plotwise, but it had lore connected to it and the worldbuilding explained it. So, where are these temples? A different planet, right? Is it the same aliens? Are people just cool with the temples? Why haven’t they been explored before. Chorus made sure to explain all of that.
...
Haley: The West and East scene-
Ria: Feast.
Haley: Confused me. ‘cause West didn’t really regret anything. He just said why he did it. And then all of the sudden East forgave him and rejoined the team. It was so weird. He doubled down on the thing she hated him for so much I was like “Wow he’s kinda an asshole” and then all of a sudden she was on his side? What?
...
Haley: Zero does its job if you want action and nothing else. And it’s not RvB. Don’t watch it if you like RvB. And I just want to acknowledge that we are nitpicking. Quite a bit. I’ll admit that. But, I wouldn’t nitpick the other RvB seasons the same way because the old RvB never took itself seriously the way Zero did.
Ria: I agree. We are nitpicking. But like, that’s why we have the movie nights.
Haley: But we are also allowed to criticize it. You can do that with any season. And with the other seasons, you could nitpick it and you can find stuff you don’t like, but there are always stuff you do like or that other people like. I just can’t find anything about Zero that I like. Besides Raymond.
Ria: Yeah. Like, I really love 15. And it had so many flaws people pointed out. And when it comes to criticism and Zero, I just don’t see many points about why people like it. They are allowed to do that though. But, like, we could have a movie night where we watch the Chorus seasons and we’d nitpick so much because we both have issues with it, but there is still so much stuff we’d still like.
Haley: I like Raymond though. He’s like Grimmons lovechild.
Ria: No. Fuck you. Don’t put that in my brain.
...
Haley: Raymond being in this… I want to say it feels like the Freelancers seasons but if Grif was part of the team or something. But that’s just “Hit and Run”. *laughs*
Ria: NO! That’s cursed. Shut up. Also, the Freelancers were way better written.
Haley: And those seasons made better sense.
Ria: And like, the Freelancer seasons did the thing with change of tone and have these new and super cool characters and fight scenes. But they kept half of the seasons to be around the Reds and Blues so we still had the humor and the dumbasses, and Zero just, it didn’t connect.
...
Haley: So, I have some thoughts on Zero.
Ria: I know, you fuck, I had to write them all down by hand.
Haley: I like bad movies, actually, but Zero didn’t stay fun, so no, I didn’t enjoy it.
...
Ria: Do you forgive me for making you watch Zero?
Haley: Yeah.
Ria: What should we watch next?
...
Also, Haley dressed up her dog for the event and you all deserve to see her:
#we asked you answered we delivered#like most of these are just stupid observation#but we do have some proper reflections on the good and the bad and the ugly#and markers!#rvb zero critical
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To Anon
Question: Yeolmaes hate baekhyun mostly because his stans are the ones sending most hate to chanyeol and baekhyun never said anything about it, instead he kinda validated their feelings by not showing up to the box premiere, avoiding mentioning him at all costs and straight up saying he doesnt like musical movies Understand that yeolmaes have to deal with hundreds of hate messages written in Korean everyday and they are at a breaking point considering most of them come from bbh’s own fans How is it possible to like chanyeol and baekhyun at the same time in a situation like this? Do you even take chanyeol feelings into consideration? No? Not even once? He has to deal with thousands of nasty comments coming from bbh fanbase while bbh comes on Twitter reminding them how cute they are and how much he loves them If you cbkists choose to ignore this and baekhyun is actually in a relationship with Pcy it just means that you all couldn’t give less of a shit about chanyeol as a person with feelings and are just a bunch of selfish pricks
Answer: Anon...sighs you can't see something from one point of view only really, but it's okay i get you, ok so let us talk about this one by one: 1. You said: Yeolmaes hate baekhyun the most because his stans are the ones sending most hate to chanyeol and baekhyun never say anything about it -When you perceive the assumption that baekhyun stans hate chanyeol the most, did u believe it right or did u question it, like why its baekhyun stans, if its true then since when they started hating chanyeol, and why do they hate chanyeol, does their reason make sense or its just stupid like how other bbhls who hate other exo members too (for example some bbhls hate jd bcs both are main vocalists and they think jd is stealing bh's spot as a vocalist) -But at the same time, we cant find the exact number that would proof that bbhls are the ones who hate chanyeol the most, we only can see what twitter shows us, and it happened to me too that i see bbhls throw hate to chanyeol the most -But at the same time too, I've been seeing yeolmaes who throw hate at baekhyun too since years ago without me knowing the reason why they do that, and I keep questioning it everytime why yeolmaes suddenly started hating baekhyun so bad, when did it start -AND at the same time too, I've been seeing other exo member stans throwing hate to either baekhyun or chanyeol -But my twitter algorithm is the same as you anon, it shows that bbhls hate chanyeol the most and yeolmaes hate baekhyun the most, so I do often make the assumption that bbhls and yeolmaes are always on each other's throat -But yet again, I don't know who started hating the first time, is it bbhls, is it yeolmaes, and why they did that -This knowledge is unknown to me so based on this, to me the most right way is to think that both sides are wrong because hating is always the worse way to deal with things, the fact that we know is chanyeol and baekhyun are good friends they are always there for each other, usually when ppl see im saying this they will say its fake and its fan service, but people can choose to not see what they dont wanna see, so the easiest proofs to prove that chanyeol and baekhyun are good friends is one chanyeol is the only member in exo that baekhyun wished happy birthday on his instagram, two both of them support each other for candy and 1 billion views by coming to the mv bts, three baekhyun and chanyeol go to vocal lessons together, four chanyeol had taken a photo with all of baekhyun's bucheon friends before so in that photo baekhyun, chanyeol, and baekhyun's bucheon friends (istg if people see these as fan service then it doesnt make sense right?)
Before we go to the next thing, I have this assumption that chanyeol and baekhyun are two members that have the highest popularity in sk, either they are the top 3 or top 4, and my reason is bcs everytime there are individual album/photobook covers sold offline, their individual covers sold out the fastest, everytime, even with nature republic stuffs, ok so there's this possibility that we keep seeing yeolmaes and bbhls on each other's throat everytime bcs well both of them are two of the most popular exo members in SK (i mean even in china, chanyeol and baekhyun are the most popular members with sehun, there's data for this)
2. You said: Baekhyun never say anything about this, he kinda "validated their feelings by not showing up to the box premiere and voiding mentioning him at all costs and straight up saying he doesnt like musical movies"
-First of all, let's look at a bigger picture, is there any idol in the k-industry like ANY IDOL that ever said to their fans "guys don't say that to my member" IS THERE. ANY.? what I know is: there is none, none at all zero zip nothing, and if there's at least one or two idols, then its just one or two idols right -And thats it anon, thats just about it, idols dont have the absolute freedom of speech, they never do, and its hurting them all of them, all they can say is: "I love EXO, I miss EXO members the most, EXO is my home" and most solo stans who see that will just say "its bs" yet solo stans are also asking for proofs that the members relationship are fine -None of these kpop idols ever say anything about hate speech from their fans that are thrown to their friends/bandmates, and this kind of thing happens in every fandom anon, not just chanyeol and baekhyun, it's just how korean entertainment industry is, idols never have the ultimate freedom to say or do anything
3. Not showing up to the box premiere, avoiding mentioning him, saying he doesnt like musical movies -That not showing up to the box premiere really changed the way you think huh anon, yeah I think that event also changed many yeolmaes' perspectives sighs okay, not showing up to the box premiere is like a very open information we can easily see it from one tweet that didnt mention baekhyun name during that event -BUT for other cases "avoid mentioning him" and "saying he doesnt like musical movies" is not a very open information, by this i mean u have to read alllll of the things baekhyun say, look at the trans for all of his vlives/shows/etc, read the whole trans for baekhyun's last vlive before he goes to the military, so u or other yeolmaes after that situation are either trying to "search for baekhyun's act or words that deny fans opinion about how they hate each other" bcs u still "have hope in baekhyun" or "search for baekhyun's act or words that support my perspective about how he hates chanyeol and never defend cy from bbhls" -"Validate their feelings" how? once again, it's just what bbhls think, did baekhyun do and say all of that because well "his motive is to support bbhls that hate chanyeol" and who are you, who are we to say that, are we our bias? can we go inside their minds and goes aha! this is why they do this and that! well no. because once again thats the entertainment industry, the chances for idols to "explain" all of the bad situations esp when its about how their fans act, is very veryyy low, or like the chance is even minus
-We are just fans who watch them on cam, without knowing what's on their mind or what is everything they are going through behind the camera, we know nothing, all of our opinions are just perspective that our mind created that turned into assumptions, we could never know the truth because kpop industry prevents their artist from showing the truths that may "hurt" people, who actually deserve to be hurt, but those people are the "money makers" for the company, it's bad it's toxic it's awful that just bcs they have to "maintain the money makers" idols can never get that freedom -Same goes with baekhyun, gdi we dont know him, we really really dont know him, his mind, his motives and reasons for his actions, who are we to judge him and call him selfish? -But what we know is baekhyun helping to defend chanyeol when that fake rumor was spreading by tweeting the mosquito thing, what we know is baekhyun and chanyeol doing their choreo for DFTF together that was practiced since early 2021 until before they enlist, what we know is baekhyun saying chanyeol he's fine when fans asked on japanese fansign, what we know is them still doing vocal lessons together, going to vocal lesson tgt too on march after the box premiere (bcs chanyeol's hair was grey in the vlog) before they enlist, what we know is baekhyun loving and singing "tomorrow" tgt with chanyeol, so what we know is they keep spending time with each other as bandmates and friends
"do you ever take chanyeol's feeling into consideration, you all couldnt give less of a shit about chanyeol as person with feelings and are just a bunch of selfish pricks" 1. Baekhyun tweeting that mosquito tweet to defend chanyeol -Responses>> People went: oh he's just defending himself, he's being selfish once again, he doesnt care about chanyeol 2. Baekhyun answering fans question about chanyeol's condition -Responses>> No one translated this after few days OP has translated Original post Jan 29: https://twitter.com/tomo_exo/status/1355177834185064451?s=20 First ever translation on FEB 13 (AND FROM A CBKIST): https://twitter.com/NTH_2705/status/1360626904756228096?s=20 Also this cbkist isnt always active translating, I know her, she's not on Twitter as much as other trans account and she doesnt understand japanese, so she actually found the post on weibo and translated it from chinese thats why it was translated 2 weeks after, but before her? does ANY account translate this? well no. 3. Baekhyun and Chanyeol doing choreo in DFTF tgt -No BTS, no anything from SM, people who hate seeing them tgt can ignore easily, chanbaek stans can only watch the part over and over 4. Baekhyun and Chanyeol practicing their hitting the woah part in just usual mv -Again no one commented about this, except chanbaek stans bcs this is easily ignored 5. Lesson With Baekhyun -Responses>> yeolmaes went "chanyeol don't do this, chanyeol im not watching this, chanyeol what are you doing, i want chanyeol only, oh god why is chanyeol with him again, chanyeol is feeding chanbaekist, his fans (bbhls) gonna come at us again, fuck this im not watching" and bbhls went "the translation is wrong look theyre trying to sabotage bbh" and yeolmaes replied with "good for him haha, ya serves him right for being selfish" and also "why is it always chanyeol who does this kind of thing and never baekhyun? oh right because hes selfish hes sm golden boy he never gonna do this bcs his channel is own by SM" "look he promoted kyoongtube even in the nng" "look SM posted kyoongtube but not NNG u can see whos the mistreated one him"
All of those 5 things I mentioned, even tho some are small things....they got mostly negative responses from yeolmaes and bbhls who are not cbkist dont they? The things that prove chanyeol and baekhyun are always there for each other and they are bandmates, true friends, nothing change between them And yet, what did bbhls and yeolmaes do? Throw negative shits and comments to those things, esp Lesson With Baekhyun, and until now still hate Baekhyun... when Lesson With Baekhyun, is a vlog recorded by Chanyeol alone, he taped his phone in the car, he added Candy MV BTS with Baekhyun calling him "chanyeol ah" and baekhyun smiling while holding the food, a vlog where he praised baekhyun's vocals, prepared playlist for him, sing tomorrow together with him, laughing during their vocal lesson, and just...doing things tgt
And yet people still call it a fanservice? feeding chanbaekist? baekhyun is still selfish? when chanyeol worked hard preparing that vlog, providing it for us, baekhyun and chanyeol practicing their part tgt for DFTF, baekhyun tweeting the mosquito tweet
When Chanyeol and Baekhyun have done so many things together, after the fake rumor, after the box premiere, proving they are still good friends... so do you even take chanyeol's feelings into consideration? oh wait not just feelings, his efforts, his time, him uploading to NNG about him hanging out with Baekhyun, have you ever take that to consideration? or just ignore all those facts because "whatever i still hate baekhyun"
So two options: 1. Hating and keep hating and telling others selfish because yall hate the fact that baekhyun never do this and that, that yall wanted him to do, but actually we don't know the reason why, we just don't know anything at all, accept assumptions that "baekhyun validated fans feeling" and thats according to you, your mind, your perspective, oh wait... it's all about you? 2. Know and accept and support and love, chanyeol and baekhyun's friendship, because thats what we know, thats what themselves say to us, thats what themselves been doing, accepting the fact that "chanyeol and baekhyun are good friends" and know we are not in the position to turn the friendship into bad relationship bcs what? bcs it comes from chanyeol and baekhyun themselves, not yeolmaes, not bbhls, not even exols, and so be a fan that know chanyeol and baekhyun have good relationship, keep reporting bbhls who said bad things about cy and vice versa, bcs what? we never want chanyeol to see that after lesson with baekhyun, apparently his "fans" still think baekhyun, his best friend and bandmate, is still a selfish person who doesnt care about chanyeol, so chanyeol is happy that we know and appreciate his relationship with baekhyun, with exo members because we care about chanyeol's feelings, because we trust his actions, his words, and we love everything he does, and also we love everyone around chanyeol that he loves
So choose... and last thing, are social media and on cam interactions, are enough to "measure" a group of people's relationships, so if your best friend never post any picture of you on their instagram and never tell stories about you to other people who well, actually are also strangers, living thousand miles away from you and your best friend, then it's okay for those strangers to say that your best friend hates you? avoiding to be affiliated with you? a selfish person? Have people ever think that it's tiring that just because you're a celebrity, you have to show everything, including minds, feelings, emotions, actions, personal reasons, to your fans? For them to be validated? And for them to turn into facts? Well, at least for me, the things I don't know then I don't know, I don't have the right to judge, and the things I know, especially positive things, that came from my own idols, that's what I'm holding on, that's what I support. *extra note: exo members always call us as EXO-Ls, not bbhls, not yeolmaes, not anyone, but EXO-Ls, so when they say they love us, "loved ones" are those who say themselves are EXO-Ls, who loves EXO as 9 members, because that's the fact
Have a good day anon, stay safe and healthy, God bless you, spread love and not hate
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Jerevin au where they both secretly have a huge crush on the other but are trying to repress it because they're friends and coworkers it would be weird. After a heist they end up at a safehouse together for the night that only has one bed and Jeremy's immediately like "I'll sleep on the couch to keep watch!!" and Gavin agrees because if they share a bed it'll be Too Much. It's fine for a while but then in the middle of the night Jeremy gets up to pee and his half-asleep brain (1/2)
(2/2) just autopilots him to the bedroom after and he gets in bed without thinking about it. Cue the next morning when they each wake up and slowly realise they're cuddling/spooning their crush and have to awkwardly escape the bed (once they're done alternating between thinking how nice it is and screaming internally). They get back to the penthouse later that day and the rest of the crew can't figure out why they're being so weird (except Michael, he's got a pretty good idea)
Anon I would appreciate it if you gave me back my one braincell, I've been looking for it all day.
But genuinely, this hits every single idea that I love. Secret, mutual pining? Check. One bed? Check. Waking up mid cuddle, torn between enjoying the moment and panicking over what they think they'll never truly have?? Check! The whole thing being so blatantly obvious to someone looking in? Check!!
Like. Ok. Alright. Let's break this down.
Secret crushes. The point when they reach this is, of course, well past Jeremy being a sort of ~fan~ of the crew, past his initial dislike of Gav, even past 'we can be at least cordial and occasionally laugh together.' No, they're full blown friends, they hang out, they talk about real shit, they trust each other. They've made it this far, and it's great, they're as happy as can be, and then.
Then there's little whisper in the backs of their heads, what if they could be more? And that's terrifying, in a lot of ways, because if it all goes south tomorrow, well. There's so much more at stake now, isn't there?
So they keep it quiet, stay content with the friendship they have. Rather have that than nothing at all. It's fine. They each try to avoid letting too much out, try not to put themselves in situations where they're likely to spill. Try not to read too much into arms thrown over shoulders or lingering smiles. It's fine.
Then a heist goes sideways and everybody is scattered at different safe houses and they're both glad they're not alone, but. But of all people, of course they get stuck with each other. Which is great, because friends or what have you, but also there's that nagging crush that just hasn't gone away.
There's also the fact that it's not so much a safe 'house' as it is safe 'shithole apartment on the other side of town'. One bed one bath, one couch, one twelve pack of beer in the fridge from god knows when. They shouldn't drink it but they do. They spend the night laughing and talking and sitting too close. It's right there, on the tips of their tongues, twin confessions they should have shared a long time ago-
But neither of them has the guys to say it.
So Jeremy offers to take the couch, because that's the best way to diffuse the undeniable energy in the room, right? Gavin let's him take it, because it must be a sign that he's enjoying this all too much, let himself get too close, right?
They go to their respective beds, both stay up far too late dissecting every word and brief touch. They reach the conclusion that they must be imagining it all, that the fact that they're sleeping separately speaks volumes. They're co-workers and friends, best friends, even, and that's all they'll ever really be. And that's enough, really it is.
But when Jeremy gets up in the middle of the night, and this shithole apartment is interchangeable for his last, and he forgets where he is, he just... Goes, he thinks, back to bed, slips under the covers and doesn't give the person beside him second thought.
Until he wakes again, recognizes Gavin, and figures he must be dreaming. There's no other explanation for how Gavin melts against him, how he let's himself be held, for the tiniest of smiles that registers just before Jeremy falls back asleep.
It isn't until he wakes up for the third and final time, somewhat early in the morning, does he realize- no, he hadn't been dreaming. His actual reality is Gavin curled into his chest. It's really Gavin's hair tickling his neck that has woken him up. It's Gavin's arm snaked around his waist, holding them close.
It's actually so much of everything he's been wanting.
But god, what kind of asshole would he be if he continued to lay here reveling in this moment while Gavin has no clue?
Unbeknownst to Jeremy, Gavin has reached the same conclusion, but only he plucks up enough courage to pull away. "Jeremy, I-"
But Jeremy is up and gone, doesn't want to have the inevitable I like you, but as a friend conversation. He leaves the room and he calls Trevor for the ok to go home. He gets it, throws what little he'd had with him into a bag, and waits in the car.
They'd talked the night before about getting something to eat on the way back, whenever it would be. Now, he just wants to get home and try to put some distance between himself and everything he'd been feeling. He blares music the entire way back and there's no chance for conversation.
At the penthouse, Gavin holes himself up with Matt in the basement and says nothing to anyone.
Jeremy's beating himself up for being so fucking stupid, how could you not remember you were supposed to be on the fucking couch and Michael calls him out for sulking.
"The fuck happened with you and Gav?"
Jeremy doesn't answer, because hes not sure what to say. The honest answer is nothing, nothing actually happened because he'd been too afraid. But it still feels like there's been a shift, so maybe he's wrong.
"I mean, did you guys finally fuck? Is that what happened?"
"Jesus Christ, Michael, I dont- no, we didn't- nothing happened." He's not sure why it feels like such a lie.
"Well shit. And i really thought you'd finally figured it out."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
Michael just stares at him, like he can't believe what he's hearing. "Come on, dude. You guys have been dancing around each other for months. You're really telling me you don't know you're fuckin in love?"
"That's- we're not-" Because they arent anything. Sure, Jeremy's been harboring some ill fated crush for far too long, but that's his problem. "Gavin and I are friends."
"No, we're friends, J. And as your friend, I've gotta tell you, you and Gav are two idiots afraid of your own feelings."
"Michael-"
"Tell him, Jeremy. He'll be over the moon, believe me."
The thing about it is, Michael is his friend. And he trusts him. Maybe he has seen something Jeremy had missed. Or ignored, more accurately. Maybe he's wrong and they'll have a big laugh over it. Maybe being honest won't be the end.
"I'll uh, I'll do that. Later. If I can."
And they do. They talk, Michael plays mediator because he knows they'll both chicken out if hes not there. Jeremy admits all the thoughts he'd had that morning, why he'd left like he did. Gavin explains that he'd thought Jeremy joining him in the middle of the night was his admission, how he'd been utterly confused by the 180. How he'd assumed he'd misread everything, hid with Matt all day to avoid embarrassment.
And when they've aired all of their confusion and are just... Happy and beaming at each other and once again sitting too close on the couch, Michael sums it up best.
"Fucking finally."
#listen im sorry i took these thoughts and fuckin ran ok#it really turned into a mini fic by the end there#id also like to imagine matt is also in the room#headphones on and ignoring everything#when asked he just#'oh. you guys just figured it out? i thought youve been together for months. well. congrats?'#also i mean it about that braincell#god i just genuinely love every idea you brought to the table#they are my absolute bread and butter#i couldnt help but to run with them#for that i thank you anon#ragehappy#jerevin#ks talks#anon
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Also since some of yall won't hear the blacktiny side of this debacle, lemme hit you with the Hongjoong and Ateez side of this (bc from some of the anons, yall are putting Hongjoongie over Blacktiny and apparently this is the only way I can get through to some yall hardheaded and borderline or full on racist asses)
KQ following in the footsteps of bigger companies before them and putting Hongjoong in braids (several times, looking at those new photos hnn) isnt good for Hongjoong, Ateez, or KQ.
Looking back at bands who have had the same thing done and gone through similar cultural appropriation incidents (i.e, BTS, EXO, Blackpink, Red Velvet, Stray Kids, Mamamoo, iKon, NCT (all units, including the recent WayV incident), etc ), you not only insult your fans by mocking their culture and/or using them for a costume, you also sever ties with a lot of potential fans and on the business end of it, thats a completely unessesary loss.
To this day, even after apologies, bands that have gone this path STILL have people who wont even touch the band because of their cultural appropriation. Everyone is different, but at the end of the day, poc are not REQUIRED to forgive companies and bands and swallow the pill, so to speak, when these topics come up.
Understand when I say what I'm about to say that I dont condone bullying, but I am using the previously mentioned incidents as examples but
To. This. Day. Even after apologies and what appears to be understanding and remorse from companies and artists, both fans and 'antis' will still bring up these cultural appropriation incidents. Even YEARS after its passed and if there was no repeat offense in between. Again, i in no capacity am condoning bullying or threats, but to this very day idols like Bang Chan (SKZ), Taeyong (NCT), Namjoon (BTS) are recieving threats and constant harassment for mistakes made previously because companies refuse to learn.
KQ set Hongjoong up for some bullshit, and all of this is completely and utterly unnecessary.
Now, unpopular opinion or whatever, but I still hold to my opinion that Hongjoong did not want this shit. He has been nothing but sincere about his intentions to connect with Atiny of all cultures and build a strong relationship with us. I very seriously doubt he was in agreement to this.
That being said, it is perfectly okay to still be disappointed. In him, in KQ. He by no means deserves hate, but as someone who is not only a blacktiny, but also Hongjoong biased myself, anyone disappointed in him is valid in being as such.
On the same hand, I'd like us all to keep in mind that Hongjoong is an idol. And I know a lot of us in the west have a very western view on things, but at the end of the day, we have to understand idol culture and companies are different from over in the west.
These idols may have *some* creative freedoms and control, some more than most, but at the end of the day, unless they completely run their own company and make their own rules, they do not have full say in what happens to them and their careers.
Idols have been very vocal about this in the past. And again, I'm in no way saying idols are completely helpless or that *some* of them dont actually see the error in their ways (plenty of idols really are just,,,problematic, no company bullshit needed), but I ask yall, if bands that have been around half a decade or more still dont have full creative control over their lives and careers, what makes yall think Hongjoong (if he didn't want these braids, which I strongly believe he didnt) could actually say no to the company holding him and his whole band in their hands and stand a chance?
I cannot stress that I'm not telling people they cant be mad or hurt *at* Hongjoong, but I'm seeing a lot of people saying he could've just "walked out of the chair" "hes a grown man, he can say no" and??? Not really no he cant???
Moving on to the reason a lot of these companies give when we raise hell about CA (if they bother to respond to), thats rooted in so many problems.
They say they put (African) braids or dreadlocs in idols hair because its "cool" or "makes them look tough" or some shit.
It fits an aesthetic. Thats why. Because it fits a hood aesthetic.
I really shouldn't have to explain to yall the problem in using someone else's culture to fit an aesthetic, but since this always comes up, allow me to tell yall a bit of why thats a problem.
The braids come into play when they want their idols, (mostly rappers, a role adopted from black culture) to look "gangsta"/"tough"/"intimidating"/or 🙄🙄🙄"urban". They take hairstyles from black culture to fit an image thats ~intimidating~.
Our braids, our dreads (which, again, to some rasta peoples, is a RELIGOUS symbol and SACRED) are temporarily put on these idols so people can gasp and go "ooo intimidating."
Historically, black people who wear their hair in braids or dreads are turned down from jobs, assaulted wrongly, looked at with prejudice, or down right murdered for the same idea. Nonblack people are historically more intimidated by a black person with hair in braids or in dreads because media portrays black people who dont have short cuts or straightened hair as someone to be feared.
Our braids, they're protective styles.
Our dreads, also protective, sometimes religious.
Our hair isnt for us to look "cool" or "intimidating". That whack ass excuse doesnt work. Companes are in their 4th generation of kpop and refuse to learn from the mistakes of past companies and generations. Yall use our culture (and brown and latinx cultures) improperly and when we tell yall why its wrong, we're pushed aside by our own fandoms or the companies we're constantly giving money to.
We're not asking for an arm and a leg. We're asking for yall to listen to us and not blatantly spit in our faces. We matter just as much as East Asian and white fans.
Also, not nearly as relevant as most of this post, but standing with blacktiny and our allies for this voting really shouldn't be as controversial and hectic as it is.
Thanxx and Inception are amazing songs. Thanxx is not going to disappear if yall vote Inception. It literally means Inception will be the TITLE song, therefore the song getting the MOST attention out of the two, which is important because you're not forcing blacktiny to have to deal with a whole promotional period of pushing a mv where our culture is blatantly being disrespected. Thanxx as a B side is not the end of the world. No, people shouldn't be rude to you about the voting, but I ask that yall please take that into account when we ask you to vote Inception.
Stay hydrated. Listen to your neighbors when they're talking about their cultures and their pain. Thanks
#long post#hn#it took my whole lunch break to write this#fie vents#and i still got more shit to say but i need to go back to work
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My Thoughts on “The Rise of Kyoshi”
Spoilers if you haven’t read “The Rise of Kyoshi.” Please, don’t spoil me if you already read “The Rise of Kyoshi.”
My Thoughts
Alas, my dreams for a Rangi/Yun/Kyoshi ot3 have been dashed but at least Avatar "Bi Mess" Kyoshi has Rangi.
I guess he’s kind of alive? Or at least, he’s some kind of spirit now? What’s going on?
Father Glowworm is fucking terrifying, What the fuck? He has teeth-filled tentacles THAT RIPS ITS VICTIMS SKIN OFF! Holy shit (or I suppose ‘holy Shu).
Speaking of profanity, I can’t believe ‘the bastard children of Oma’ is now a canon profane phase in the Avatarverse.Kind of just cracks me up, I dont know.Funnilly enough, this happened ra short time after we got ‘holy Shu,” which made me want more creative swears instead of lazy substututes for holy shit. At east Avatar had monkeyfeathers.
I love all the little worldbuilding details that makes the world come alive and make it feel like history is being shaped . Like the little detail about the South Pole not getting lumber for ships and the little ironies like how only the Fire Navy ships have access to the southern waters, stuff like that.
I kind of got the feeling of the world being shaped in the comics, but the book just hits different. I'm not sure if it's the scope of the world being enlarged again, my own interests or what, but it just feels right. It probably doesn’t hurt that Yee throws in a bunch of names and titles to make you feel immersed in the world and all the different people involved.
This book is not messing around. I know it’s partially because YA fiction is allowed to a lot of things that you can’t do with say YA television, but man there are just so many ‘oh shit’ moments in this books. They also realized they could get away with a lot more death and violence, so they just went with it.
I know the show has its moments but most of the time we were kept a distance away from the death and destruction (most of the time), and there wasn’t a whole lot of death and violence on the regular.
Speaking of violence: Jianzhu. Just AHHH. This guy. I want to know what he did to the wounded guy in Hujing. It’s one of the things that’s done off screen. The fact that we’ve seen him commit acts of cruelty and violence just makes your imagination run wild, wondering just what the hell he actually did.
HE POISONED HIMSELF JUST TO CAST SUSPICION OFF HIMSELF WHEN HE POISONED AN TIRE CONCLAVE OF EARTH SAGES.
Th dialogue and writing in this book is phenomenal, especially in the last two thirds of the book. I was not prepared. I reread passages because they were just so well-written sometimes. It was like they said ‘what if we took the level of politicking and dialogue from the Ba Sing Se arc and stretched it out to book length?”
A lot of writers have tried to describe fight scenes in the Avatar world, but I think Yee handled it well. I especially liked how he tried convey the sheer power of the Avatar State, and how a beginning Avatar still is unable to control all that combined power.
Can’t say I agree with forgiving Kyoshi’s parents. I’m personally not ready for that just yet.
On the other hand poor Lek. :(. Kid was growing on me.The kid did from an allergic reaction to to shirshu poison, not even from the poison itself (which was just meant to paralyze the the victim).
Obviously the book is going to have YA related tropes like explaining things to the audience a lot but that’s less a valid criticism and more just a result of me having moved on from YA fiction ages ago. With that said, I still wasn’t expecting the kind of dialogue we got with this book. I was blown away with some of the conversations in the latter half of the book, especially the stuff with the Yellow Necks, and the conversations between Kyoshi and Gao Ge.
Plus you have Kyoshi’s thought process as she becomes more okay with killing and tries to sort out her philosophies as a young Avatar.
I think part of me missed having to look up stuff when I first watched Avatar and learned that some of the stuff in the show was based on real life things. It just felt nostalgic looking up stances and the like. I even read some stuff on the Yellow Turban Rebellion even though I recognized the reference immediately.
In my ignorance, it never occurred to ,e that the fans Kyoshi used were based on a real thing. I just assumed it was an airbending thing I’d seen illustrations of war fans, but I thought to look into it. I wish I had sooner. But, that’s the thing about Avatar. You get to learn.
Things I’m looking forward to reading “The Shadow of Kyoshi”
Avatar Kuruk’s redemption. I’ve heard a lot about that, and I can’t wait to read about it.
All that Fire Nation political intrigue that I’ve also read a little about. Apparently we got ourselves a little succession crisis coming up courtesy of a illegitimate son and disputes between royal houses and I want that so bad.
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Sixth Sense
Run, we need to get a way!
Guys run!
This isnt good, we need to get out of here and now!
LEAVE THEM ALONE!
Exploring places was something you had done since you were young, being the youngest and the only girl in your group of cousins, you wanted to show them you werent scared to explore abandoned places, or even haunted places. Your old home town was founded as an army base during the civil war and saw blood shed for the first give or take 100 years of its existence, which caused the places you and your cousins to explore to be haunted. Fast forward to present day, you no longer live in your hometown, but live in Santa Monica, California with a mundane job to pay for the overly expensive loft you were renting. You also had a small youtube channel, nothing too big, it was more of a way to record your adventures in California and a way for your parents to make sure you were okay. That is until you bumped into a very popular social media duo while they were trying to sneak into a ‘haunted’ location near where you lived. The warning you gave them, followed by a video by the duo a week later, caused them to contact you and to see if you wanted to join them for haunted location.
That was over a year ago, and now you regularly join them and TFIL for ‘haunted’ overnights. A majority of which were legit, you could feel the presence of spirits before you stepped foot on the property, while others were just people being a-holes and scaring you guys off. Thats one of the reasons why you joined the duo and TFIL for those adventures, you were able to sense a spirit near by, and were able to warn them when they went too far. This has been something you’ve been able to do since you were a kid, and wasnt an unfamiliar feeling either. That is, until Colby told you that he and Sam wanted you to join them for a haunted overnight in London, with Cory and Jake in tow as well.
With your luggage in tow and your new passport in hand, you and the guys were off to London for Sam and Colby’s new series. What they didnt tell you was, there were two locations you would be visiting, possible a third, but two for sure. The first location did a number on you and the group, the experts told you the stories associated with the room Sam and Colby and with the floor the five of you were staying on. Everything that went on during the night, and after the group went to their rooms for the night, shook the group, you especially. You weren’t one to have nightmares much less ones you could remember after waking up, but the dream you had stayed with you as you traveled to the second location.
“Hey, you okay (Y/N)? You look like you’ve been in a trance since we left the hotel.” Corey, who was sitting next to you in the backseat asked you as you looked down at your hands.
“Just thinking about what happened last night.” You murmured, your nightmare coming back to mind. “I didn’t want to freak you guys out while we were checking out, but I had a really intense nightmare that included all of us.”
“Nightmare? I thought you said you didnt have them?” Colby asked, looking at you through the rear view mirror, his eyes shifting from you to the road.
“Thats the thing I dont. I havent had one since I was a kid. It was after you came knocking at my door asking if I had called you guys, or even asking if I had left a voice mail. I fell asleep for an hour and I woke up from what felt like a never ending nightmare, I wasnt going to let myself go back to sleep so I sketched out what was happening in my dream. The only thing I could draw was the church, and its surroundings.” You explained grabbing your bag taking out a notebook you carried around with you, flipping it to the page where you drew the church. “The thing that stuck out the most was the graveyard that surrounded it, and the forest.”
~~~
“Hey (Y/N), didnt you say you had a nightmare about a church?” Jake asked from your right, shaking you awake from your short slumber.
“Y-Yeah, what about it?” You yawned, rubbing the sleep from your eyes, looking straight out the windshield. Both Sam and Colby were looking out to the left of the car, their camera recording on the dash straight at you.
“And that the church was surrounded by a graveyard?” Sam said this time, from his seat in the passenger side.
“Yeah, what of...” You started before you looked out the window to your left. “No, there’s no fucking way.”
“(Y/N) did you know what church we were going to today?” Colby asked, turning to look at you face to face. “Because that’s exactly the church you drew.”
“NO! You guys wouldn’t even tell us the name of the church! How was is supposed to know THIS was the church we were going to!?” You questioned the blue eyed brunette in the driver seat.
“I dont like this you guys.” Corey said from your left. “(Y/N) had a nightmare, a NIGHTMARE, about this place. And she apparently doesn’t even have nightmares, and she has one about this place, A PLACE SHE’S NEVER EVEN SEEN BEFORE!”
“Guys, off camera (Y/N) told us she had a nightmare, note she hasn’t had a nightmare since she was a kid, about us at a church surrounded by a graveyard last night after the phone call. She also said she drew out the church, a way to keep her awake until we had to check out this morning.” Sam explained to the viewers what was going on. “And this is what she drew, without knowing what church we were going to.” Sam grabbed the notebook from you and showed it to the camera.
“Which is the exact church we’re staying in tonight.”
~~~
“Okay, this is getting freaky. (Y/N), has called everything thats happened so far, from the crows, to the teeth on the graves. I dont think staying here is a good idea guys.” Jake said as the sun started to set over the woods at the back end of the church, giving the group less light to see over the graveyard. “She even called the fucking tombs in the church!”
“Come on Jake, shes also said by this time in her dream shit hit the fan, and we’re okay, we already have our blankets for the night, the camera is ready to record us for the rest of the night to make sure we capture everything we can. We’ll be okay.” Colby said trying to calm down the other skeptic in the group. You said nothing as Jake argued with Sam and Colby, all you wanted to do was get out of the place as fast as you could, and the only way to do that is go to sleep. Being unconscious was better than feeling on edge the entire time.
“What else did you dream (Y/N), was this in the dream too?” Corey asked taking a seat next to you, your back to the three other guys as you faced the front of the church.
“No, thats why I want to leave. With the dream I was able to pin point what not to do but now that its nothing like it, i’m scared that something might happen.” You confessed, still looking towards the front of the church, the tombs covered by darkness. “I’m not able to stop something bad from happening if something does go wrong.”
“I understand the feeling. Especially after what my little brother texted me yesterday, I feel like I cant help him if I dont know what im going up against. And its scary.” Corey whispered as the yelling behind the two of you started to quiet down.
“We’ve both had things happen since our childhood. You’ve been seeing things since your family used the Ouija board, and I’ve had the feelings since before I could remember. Believe it or not my mom once told me she could feel spirits when she was my age, and so did my grandma. They’ve both told me that they were able to feel spirits most of their lives, but they cant anymore.”
“What stopped them? Maybe you can do that and you wont be able to feel the spirits anymore!”
“I dont think it’s that simple.” You laughed. The dry laugh caught the attention of the three other guys in the church as well. “They stopped being able to feel spirits the day I was born.”
“Hey guys, I think this is a good time to head to bed.” Sam said this time, the harsh LED light illuminating dark half of the church. “The faster we get to sleep, the faster we’ll be out of here.”
~~~
Sam! Colby! Guys! Get back to the Church now! Jake, Corey, i’m going to go and get them, stay here.
You’re too late
No! No i’m not! Sam! Colby!
You cant protect them
I WILL!
The air was finally able to reach your lungs as you shot up from your make shift bunk. The cold air surrounding you caused steam to radiate of your person, and your deep exhales to create puffs of smoke in front of you. You looked around to see if your sudden movements woke anyone else up, thats when your heart dropped. Before you went to bed, Sam took the bunk closest to the door and Colby took the one to your left while Corey and Jake took the ones to your right. Both Sam and Colby’s bunks were empty.
“No, no, no, no!” You mentally yelled pulling on your shoes as fast and as quietly as you could, not wanting to wake the two other boys. As you got up, you heard one of the bunks shift and a loud gasp come from behind you.
“Did, did you shake me awake!?” Jake asked, his eyes wide. “(Y/N), did you shake me awake?!”
“No. Now quiet down.” You tried shooshing Jake. “You’ll wake Corey if you’re too loud.”
“Too late for that, what’s going on? Where’s Sam and Colby?” Corey asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “Jake are you okay man? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“I woke up because it felt someone was shaking me awake! Then when I got up (Y/N) was getting up from her bunk.” Jake explained getting up from his bunk and flipping it over. “Where are Sam and Colby? Did they do this?”
“I dont know! When I woke up they were gone, thats when I got up and you woke up. Stay here, I’m going to look for them.” You said grabbing one of the extra flashlights.
“No! We’re not going to let you go out there on your own.” Corey said slipping on his shoes. “Whoa, wait what happened to you? You’ve soaked through your shirt.” Thats when you realized your sweater was completely soaked with sweat from the nightmare you were having before you woke up.
“My nightmare. No.” You whispered before you bolted towards the door of the church. “You guys stay here, I think somethings gonna happen, something bad. I have a big bag of salt in my backpack, use it to make a circle around the bunk area, and DONT leave it. Not for me, not for anyone okay? Unless you see us in person, dont believe your ears, okay?”
You stood at the door, the gates open behind you, leading out into the grave yard, Corey and Jake confused. “Things are going to get bad.”
“Bad? What do you mean bad? (Y/N), you can’t leave us in the dark, especially after everything thats been happening!” Jake yelled walking towards you.
“FINE!” You screamed back. This was probably the first time they heard you raise your voice in anger. “Fine! When I was younger, right when I was realizing that could feel spirits, a demon attacked one of my cousins while we were exploring one of the old hospitals in the area. My other cousins all ran away, too scared to think of a way to get the demon away from them. I stepped in and the next thing I knew it was three weeks later and I was in the hospital. I was in a coma after detaching the demon from my cousin who was in a coma as well. The thing is while I was in the coma I had a never ending nightmare.”
“What does that have to do with us!?”
“Because! I was having nightmares of this place! Thats why when I woke up today I was repeating the nightmare from all those years ago! Before tonight I had no recollection of what happened to me and my cousin, its almost as if it never happened. And because of the nightmare from yesterday and the eerie feeling from today, I was able to remember it. I texted one of my older cousins while we were out buying blankets and they said that it was true, but that the family promised not to bring it up to either of us. In my nightmare, from YEARS before I moved out to California, I had a nightmare of you four. I was trying to protect you guys, Sam and Colby. Now it’s actually happening, so I have to go and protect Sam and Colby.”
“Wait! Why do we have to stay here? If we go and look for them all together we might be able to find them faster!” Corey said this time, grabbing the camera from where Colby left it to record you all through the night.
“Because the safest place you can be is in this church. The salt circle will keep you extra protected, you coming with me will just put you in danger. Please, stay here. There’s still a couple of hours until sunrise, if we’re not back by then call the police.”
~~~
“SAM! What the hell are you doing man!” Colby yelled, finally catching up with his blonde best friend. “You cant just get up and walk out of the church and into the creepy ass woods by yourself.”
“Sorry, I have the camera as a light so its not that bad, but I kept hearing things. I wasnt sure if it was from inside the church at first, then I heard it outside.”
“What were you hearing? You could have woken one of us up. You cant be going out here by yourself.”
“SAM! COLBY!”
“Is that (Y/N)? What’s she doing up?” Colby thought pointing the flashlight he had towards the direction of your voice. As Colby was about to call out to you, the atmosphere around them grew heavy. “Whoa, did you feel that Sam?”
“Yeah-yeah, it felt like the air got heavy. I think its time for us to get back to the church Colby.” Sam said this time, the camera facing Colby, the look of fear obvious on their faces. “Wait, where’s (Y/N)? I swore I heard her voice!”
“SAM! COLBY! Jesus, there you guys are!” You yelled, running up to them from the woodwork. “We need to get back to the church now!”
“We were about to head back, but why are you soaked? What happened?” Before you could respond to Colby’s frantic questions, an unearthly screech cut you off. The three of you fell to the ground, hands covering your ears, the camera in Sam’s hand fell, the light on it flickering from the fall. “What the hell was that?!”
“We need to get back to the church now!” The crack in your voice scared the duo. For as long as they’ve known you, you’ve never been one to be scared by the spirits, but this was a different story. “Please, we need to get back to the church!”
Grabbing the camera, you pointed it at the duo in front of you, the light still flickering, but it was the only way to keep you in your line of sight. “I can’t lose sight of you guys, so please lets get back to Corey and Jake.”
“What’s going on (Y/N)? Why didnt you bring Corey and Jake with you?” Sam asked coming to a stop near the edge of the woods.
“Yeah, and did you feel that shift earlier? What was that?” Colby asking this time.
“There’s no time for questions, we need to get to safety, please!” You were pleading with them at this point. The sinking feeling in your stomach was getting worse. “Please we need to leave!”
“No! Not until you tell us whats going on!” Colby yelled at you. It didn’t phase you, it was a high stress situation and yelling in normal. Taking in a deep breath you told the duo what you told Jake and Corey back at the church. You could tell as you were reciting the story that they knew this was serious.
“So, we need to get the hell out of here and back to the church where its sa-” You started before the light on the camera Sam still had in his hand, went out.
There’s no place to run, you were smart to leave the other two in the church, but these two are mine.
“Don’t you dare get near them! I’m the one you want! I’ve beat you once before, I can beat you again!” You yelled at nothing. “Whatever you guys do, do not talk to him. You guys acknowledging him will only make it worse.”
“Right.” The pair whispered. As your eyes adjusted to the darkness, you grabbed onto Sam and Colby, “We need to get back to the church, follow me.”
Not so fast (Y/N), you dont think it’ll be that easy?
“Sam!” A familiar voice yelled from the darkness. “Sam please help me I’m hurt!”
“Ka-” Sam started before you let go of Colby to slam your hand on Sam’s mouth.
“It’s a trick! Don’t trust your ears, they’ll trick you.” You explained. “Same goes for you Colby, no matter who you hear, it doesn’t matter who, if you cant see them, do not trust the voices you hear.” You grabbed Colby’s jacket, pulling him and Sam back towards the church. “I’m sorry you guys.”
“Why are you apologizing? It’s not your fault this is happening, you didn’t know that this thing was going to come back.”
“Yeah, if anything its our fault that we didnt listen to you, after you were predicting everything that happened.”
They’re right, they should have listened to you, just like your cousins should have listened to you when this happened all those years ago.
“We were children! You had the balls to attack children! That just shows you how weak of a demon you are! It makes you even weaker when a child was able to exercise you from a the body of another child!” You yelled into the darkness. “You thought you were powerful because of the place we were in! Your worshipers used the hospital as your portal! You were using my cousin as a scapegoat!”
You werent strong enough to get rid of me the first time. What makes you think you’ll be strong enough now?
As the demon started to laugh, the ground shaking with every cackle, the moon showed itself from behind the clouds, the graveyard lit up with the light. In the middle of all the graves was a massive being, a mix of human and a crow.
“You were always here weren’t you? You were hiding among the crows.” You said letting go of the duo. You faced this demon once before and lived, you can face him again.
“(Y/N)! Don’t!” Colby whispered as you walked towards the demon. “We need to get to the church!”
“Come on, (Y/N)!”
“No. Not anymore, if I dont get rid of him now, I’ll have to live with this asshole following me!”
Oh, I’m not planning on letting you live, (Y/N). You arent going to live to see tomorrow.
“And im not letting you go, Raum.” With that the creature, screeched at you, stepping back away from you. “I’m no priest, or exorcist but I’ve researched how to get rid of demons!”
“(Y/N) what are you doing!?” Colby ran up to you, blocking your path to the demon. “We need to get back to the church! We’ll be safe their.”
“Sam, grab Colby and haul ass towards the Church, Jake and Corey will be waiting where the bunks are in a circle of salt, that’s where you’ll be the safest. If I don’t make it back by sunrise, I’ve already told Corey and Jake to call the police. Hell maybe call a priest too.” You explained looking between the two again. “Please, im begging you.”
“Come on Colby.” Sam whispered, grabbing onto Colby’s arm pulling him towards the church. “(Y/N) can do this, we’ll only hold her back if we’re here.”
~~~
“Jake it’s been hours and they still aren’t back, and what the hell was that sound!?” Corey asked the only other person in the circle. The yelling and screeching that came from outside the church were something out of a horror movie, it didnt seem real.
“I dont know, and all the cameras cut out when the first screech happened and they havent been able to record since then. Even the cell service has been shit.” Jake groaned sitting on one of the bunks in the middle of the salt circle they drew after (Y/N) ran out the church.
“What if it doesnt come back by sun up? How are we going to get help?”
“We’ll just go to someone’s ho-” Jake started before the doors to church doors slammed open. “Sam? Colby? Is that really you?” Before they could answer Jake grabbed the nearest bottle of holy water and sprayed the duo as they walked towards the bunks.
“Really Jake? Was that necessary?” Colby asked shaking off the cold holy water.
“Sorry, had to make sure. Hey, where’s (Y/N)? And what was that sound from earlier?” Jake asked realizing the person who forced them to stay in the church wasn’t with the duo.
“(Y/N) stayed outside. Remember when she told us when she was younger how her cousin was attacked by a demon back in her hometown?” Colby asked looking between Corey and Jake as the screeching continued in the graveyard, scaring the group.
“Well apparently the thing out there is the same one from her childhood. She told us to come to the church and wait for either her or for the sun to come up. And for us not to trust our ears, that the thing out there might try to get us outside, he almost got me by sounding like Kat.” Sam explained as more screeching and roars sounded from the darkness outside. “And to add salt to the wound, I dropped the camera when the first roar happened so I wasn’t able to get any footage of the demon outside.”
“Right when the first roar happened all the cameras in here went out too. There’s still battery in all of them but they wont record. And, WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LEFT HER OUT THERE?” Corey yelled at the best friends. “You’re letting her go against that thing ALONE!?”
“We had to! If we stayed there the demon would have used us against (Y/N), and she’s gone against it before and lived, shes got this in the ba-” Sam started before another roar cut him off, the lights in the church flickering as a scream joined the roar.
“COLBY, I CAN’T DO THIS ALONE!”
“Its not (Y/N)! Dont listen to it!” Sam grabbed Colby before he sprinted out the door. “You know for a fact she wouldn’t call out for us! In any of our investigations, has she ever called for us? No. Don’t listen to him!”
“COLBY HELP! PLEASE I CANT BEAT HIM!”
“COLBY YOU BETTER NOT! DONT YOU DARE LISTEN TO HIM!”
“See that’s (Y/N)!” Sam said tugging Colby back into the salt circle, “We have to trust in her.”
~~~
“It’s been two weeks since the church and we haven’t told the fans what happened, what are we going to do?” Sam asked looking up at Colby, from his seat next to (Y/N). It had been two weeks since the church incident, and they were still in the UK. The night took a turn for the worst when the sun had finally come up and (Y/N) hadn’t made it back to the church. It took almost two days to find her somewhere in the middle of the wood miles away from the church the group stayed at.
“I know they deserve answers, but our main concern is to make sure (Y/N) is alright. We already contacted her family and they’re aware, which is the most important part. Maybe us staying and Corey and Jake leaving was a bad idea.” Colby muttered, pacing around the hospital room. (Y/N) hadn’t woken up from the coma she was found in almost two weeks prior, and it was concerning the boys. (Y/N)’s parents told the boys that the last time she was in a coma like this it lasted almost a month, and that the boys shouldn’t worry about (Y/N), shes stronger than she seems. “I wish (Y/N) would give us some sort of sign that shes okay.”
“Why does it feel like its out fault? Like if we hadn’t come to London none of this would have happened? Or what if we had stayed in the church? Maybe then we would have been back in LA planning our next adventure.” Sam whispered, rubbing his face with his palms.
“Damn it!” Colby finally yelled after a few minutes of silence. “Why the fuck did this happen to (Y/N)? What if we had stayed there? Maybe it would have been one of us instead of her! Fuck!”
“Quiet down please. We’re in a hospital for fuck sake.” The whisper caught the duo off guard. It was the small smile on the patience’s face that brought them to tears as they hugged the person on the hospital bed. “Okay, I can’t breath guys.”
“Wh-what? When did you wake up? How are you feeling? Do-do you need anything?” Colby asked as Sam ran out the room going to find a doctor or nurse.
“When you guys started to blame yourselves for what happened. Raum was going to come after me one day, it just chose the church because of all the spiritual energy that we were carrying from the hotel the night before.” You, explained before a doctor, nurse, and Sam ran into the room. It was a week later that the trio was on their way back to the States, when you noticed something.
“Hey Sam, Colby.” You started as you made your way across the London airport to your gate. You stopped and looked around, something was different.
“What’s up (Y/N)? Do you feel something?” Colby asked coming up to (Y/N)
“That’s the thing, I dont feel anything.” You said looking around the airport, every place you’ve ever visited had some sort of spirit lingering around. Good or evil you were able to feel them almost 80% of the time.
“What do you mean you don’t feel anything?” Sam asked the camera in his hand pointing at you and Colby. The three of you had agreed to release what footage you had onto their Youtube channel since you felt like their fans needed some sort of explanation. They just needed to film the last bits of them leaving London before they would do a sit down segment back in LA explaining what had happened at the church.
“I dont feel any spiritual presence, like any. It wouldn’t have bothered me but I had felt a presence when we first landed here. Now there’s nothing.” You said looking back at Sam and Colby. “Maybe me winning cost me my ability to feel spirits.” That statement became even more true when you landed back in LA and did a quick visit to places you knew were haunted, you couldn’t feel anything in any of the locations.
“Hey, maybe its a good thing? I mean people who have some sort of power are usually targeted by demons or evil spirits.” Sam said as the three of you walked up to the first place the three of you met.
“If it keeps you safe, maybe its a good thing that you lost your ability.” Colby said this time.
“But now I feel like I wont be able to protect you guys.” You said looking back at the best friends, tears welling up in her eyes.
“But, we’ll be able to protect you. When you would tell us to back off during an overnight we started to notice how certain things would happen around the time you would speak up. We’re able to tell if somethings going to happen because of all the times you brought it to our attention that something was wrong.” Colby said walking up to you, giving you a small smile. “Anything to protect you even if you dont have your sixth sense.”
#sam and colby fanfic#sam golbach#colby brock#sam golbach fanfic#colby brock fanfic#sam and colby AU#sam golbach AU#colby brock AU
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kiss me
pairing park jisung x reader
genre fluff, best friends to lovers
word count 2k
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you lay next to jisung, tucked comfortably in his side with his arm on the back of the sofa, the only source of light coming from the tv in the middle of the dorm’s living room. luckily, the dreamies were on vacation, the other boys gone to visit their families while jisung stayed back with you since you were also on break from school. there was a large bowl of popcorn nestled inbetween your crossed legs, filled up to the brim of the microwave popcorn the boys had laying around, an almost gross amount of butter and salt added to it (though you and jisung werent planning on eating their entire stash, but hey thats a problem for jaemin to handle).
your favorite movie, To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before was playing on the one and only netflix account you and the dreamies shared, and any chance you had to get your best friend of nearly 15 years to watch one of your cheesy teen-romance movies, you took it and ran with it.
the only problem was actually getting him to pay attention, the taller boy slumped in the sofa with his long legs taking up almost the whole floor space between the sofa and the coffee table, his other hand occupied with his phone, his eyes glued to the screen. you wrinkled your nose at him, disappointed in the fact that he had missed approximately 15 scenes of your soon-to-be-husband, Noah Centineo in all of his handsome glory, playing the character of Peter.
jisung didnt even notice you looking at him, too invested in his instagram feed, so when you threw a popcorn at his face, he flinched, dropping his phone in the process. he was about to pinch you when you raised your hand at him, bluffing that you were gonna hit him, which worked in making him back down almost every time. jisung sucked his teeth and crossed his arms, sulking as he looked at the screen for the 5th time.
‘watch the movie’ you whined, jutting out your bottom lip and making your eyes big, playfully smacking him on the chest, jisung deadpanning at your attempt to get him to actually watch the movie. ‘watch the movie’ he mimicked you in a tiny, whiney voice, scrunching his nose back at you, giving you a cheeky smile before returning his eyes back to the screen. you narrowed your eyes at him, getting comfortable in his side again. in the span of the two of you bickering, you had completely forgotten where you were in the movie, until the scene went dark, and Peter lays in the hot tub.
oh. you were at that part. the kissing part.
you could feel jisung shift uncomfortably next to you, his body tensing up slightly as Lara Jean climbed into the hot tub with Peter, tension in the air in both the scene and between you and jisung. you knew jisung cringed whenever a kissing scene came on, and when Peter grabbed Lara’s leg and threw it over his waist so that she was straddling him, the two of them leaning in to share a steamy kiss in the hot tub, jisung flailed his impossibly long limbs around, nearly knocking over your bowl of popcorn. seriously, this boy was a walking noodle. ‘this is so gross! god, why do you like watching these things?’ he huffed, covering his eyes with his large hands, dragging them down his face, glaring at you with a very unamused expression on his face. ‘what?! theyre in love!’ you clasped your hands together, an exaggerated sigh leaving your lips as you pretend-fainted onto jisungs shoulder, looking up at your best friend with sparkling eyes. ‘i wish i had a tall, handsome boyfriend to come sweep me off my feet and kiss me like that!’ you stuck your tongue out at jisung, sitting up and crossing your arms.
jisung felt himself stiffen at the sight of your pink tongue peeking through your soft lips, gulping as he rolled his eyes once again, trying to ignore his heart that was beating at a rapid pace. ‘you have a tall, handsome boy right next to you’ he mumbled, deadpanning you once again. did this boy ever smile? it was hard for you to take him seriously, so you just let out a nervous laugh. ‘ji, we’re best friends, almost like siblings. if we kissed i think that’d be like, lowkey incest’ you tried to hide the shakiness in your voice. you couldnt even hear the movie playing in the background anymore, the sound of your beating heart muffling out any sound in your ears.
if the lights werent off, surrounding the room in darkness except for the tv, you’re sure jisung would be able to see your beet-red cheeks. the eye contact the two of you held was almost uncomfortable, an invisible string seeming to bring the two of you closer. jisung took the bowl of popcorn from between your legs, putting it on the coffee table before he crawled over you, your back now pressed against the seats of the sofa, jisung caging over you, looking up at him with wide eyes.
‘ji, what are you-‘
‘kiss me’ he said, his expression rock solid, contrasting the way he was nearly sweating and the way his heart was about to explode out of his chest. you nearly choked on your own saliva, the bluntness of his words making your heart skip a beat. ‘what?! why me? why dont YOU kiss me?’ you complained, feeling your breath become labored at the change of the air between you.
‘why do i have to do everything?’ he mumbled, taking a deep breath of air through his nose before he leaned down and connected his lips with yours.
your eyes shot open in a split second, a small scream threatening to escape your mouth. you didnt actually expect him, your best friend and life-long crush, to KISS you. there was no way he was kissing you, right? his lips were way too soft and the way his hair brushed against your forehead was almost too perfect, this couldnt be real, you had to be dreaming. you closed your eyes, expecting this to all end by the next time you opened your eyes, hopefully waking up from this dream.
that was until he breathed out, the cool air fanning across your skin, his tongue lightly swiping over your bottom lip. that set off electric sparks to flow all the way through your body, stopping at your fingertips. you gasped, parting your lips, allowing jisung to playfully lick at your tongue before he pulled back, looking down at you with wide, blown out eyes, your eyes the same way.
‘was that too much? shit, im sorry i shouldnt have kissed you, fuck-‘
you cut him off, grabbing the back of his neck and crashing your lips back into his, this kiss slower, no tongue, just the feeling of your lips molding together. it was so intimate, almost too much to handle. you couldnt explain the feelings that were blooming from your heart. you were happy, shocked, and you wanted to cry all at the same time. jisung pulled away again, the two of you out of breath, hearts threatening to leap out of your chests.
you could feel the tears threatening to escape your eyes, and instead of letting jisung see you get all emotional over a kiss, you started to smack at his arms until he was no longer over you, leaning back to sit on his heels. ‘jisung! why did you kiss me?!’ you yelled at him, still smacking the boy anywhere you could reach him. ‘ow! ow! fuck-y/n! stop hitting me!’ he brought his arms to his face, trying to curl up in a ball to shield himself from your ruthless attack on him (as if a boy his height could actually manage to make himself small).
you felt him grab your wrists with his hands, his scowl softened when he was finally able to see your face, your eyes shiny and cheeks wet. ‘hey, hey, what happened?’ his deep voice held concern and fright in it, afraid he had done something to hurt you. you sniffled, looking at the bowl of popcorn, avoiding eye contact. ‘y/n, im sorry for kissing you, if you dont feel the same way thats totally fine.’ he said with a soft voice, releasing one of your wrists to wipe the trails of tears from your cheeks with his thumb.
‘god, youre so dumb’ you mumbled, looking at him. his eyebrows knit together in confusion, lips slightly parted. ‘of course i feel the same way! that’s why im crying! do you know how long i’ve liked you?’ you exclaimed, making jisung fall silent.
you, the girl of park jisung’s dreams, and his best friend of 15 years, actually liked him back?
he looked at you with wide eyes, unable to believe what was happening. ‘do you know how long i’ve liked YOU?? i thought i made myself obvious! all of the cuddle sessions we had, the times we’ve held hands, when i play with your hair, i just thought you didn’t like me back!’ he complained, running a hand through his black hair out of frustration. jisung looked you dead in the eyes, fumbling his hands around to find yours, lacing your fingers together.
‘so you’re telling me, this whole time we’ve both liked eachother? we just never saw the signs?’ you said in a shaky voice, blushing when you saw your small hands holding jisung’s big ones. something about this felt different, the way his hands cradled yours, his thumb running over yours in the most perfect way. it made both of your hearts race, a pink tint coming up to rest on your cheeks.
‘uh, no shit, sherlock’ jisung teased, giving you one of his heart-melting smiles, raising your interlocked hands up to his face, kissing the back of your hands. you stuck out your tongue at him, unable to hold back the giggle that was bubbling in your chest. ‘ji?’ you whispered, looking down at your hands once again. ‘yeah?’ he leaned in slightly, unable to hear you clearly.
‘i think i’m in love with you, actually’ you looked back up at jisung, and thats when it hit him. your red nose, pink cheeks, puffy, sparkling eyes and soft, kiss-swollen lips. ‘i-‘ his voice cracked, clearing his throat.
‘i think i’m in love with you too, y/n’
your eyes widened, a big smile spreading across your lips, jisung matching your expression. you reached over and grabbed a hand-full of the now soggy popcorn, hurling it at him, bursting out in a fit of giggles. ‘jisung! you’re so cheesy! cheesier than this movie!’ you playfully wrestled with him, laughs and screams filling the living room. ‘yah! thats gonna stain the couch and when jaemin yells at me for it im not gonna cover for you!’ jisung threatens, finally getting his feet on your stomach to kick you off of him.
your laughing dies down, a comfortable silence filling the air. you two just sit there, staring at eachother, admiring eachother’s features. your heart swells up for the millionth time that night, reaching up and brushing his hair back and out of his face. jisung turns his head and playfully licks at your hand, chuckling at the way you pull back, a grimace on your pretty face.
you purse your lips at jisung. ‘so..does this mean i can call you my boyfriend?’ you asked in a tiny voice, scooting closer to him, your knees bumping together. ‘only if i get to call you my girlfriend’ jisung leans in and rubs his nose against yours, giving it a quick peck right after.
you smile, the two of you looking at eachother like you two put stars in the sky.
‘i like the sound of that’, you say, sealing the deal with a kiss.
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and now, the thrilling conclusion, where EVERYTHING GOES TO SHIT
never did find all these tapes or understand what they were about, either. gdi
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK NO NO NO!! NO!!!
god this scene was so well done, though. almost too well. something about the old phone and the. “my friend is suddenly Not Okay what the fuck do i do” really, really struck a nerve with some shit i went through in high school
i dont... understand what happened to his body, though. i think he did this because he knew they needed someone on the Other Side to be able to stop the cult. maybe he also just couldn’t take the pressure anymore as well. i think he realized someone had to and he decided it would be him. maybe he even knew something about what sal was going to have to do and maybe he didn’t want to be there when it happens. maybe he knew he wasn’t getting out of this alive anyway, so he decided he’d rather just do it himself and let his death mean something. i dont know. i dont know. this hit so fucking hard im honestly still a lil shaken up about it
so i guess... whatever the cult was doing, whatever demonic influence is still ravaging this place, everyone was already doomed from the start. everyone was already infected with the curse or The Dark or whatever it is. everyone who died here couldn’t pass on because something went Wrong and was keeping them there
and at this point i think everyone was essentially already dead before sal got to them. they would have been consumed either way
i dont think i like the fact that sara is being taken by the dark, too. i dont know what that means. maybe it just means david believed she was a person enough for the dark to latch onto her and try to take her too. maybe it means something else
i dont understand what happened to these two, either. they’re the only ones who were faded out like this instead of being consumed by the ooze. it didn’t seem to make any difference, though. i dont know why only maple knew to run or why she didn’t try to take them with her
GOD FUCK
WAS HE LIKE THIS THE WHOLE TIME??? GOD
FEAR
WHAT??????? NO????? WHAT
this is so bad this is so bad this is so bad you’re gonna make me do this aren’t you. you’re gonna make me do all of this
im sorry man you were weird but as far as i can tell you didn’t deserve this
sara isn’t acknowledged. i still want to know why the dark was trying to take her too
im sorry im sorry im so fucking sorry
well. i guess that. explains the trial, then. boy this sure is a fucking lot to take in
anyway, im. ashley now and ive found maple. i guess this is how we’re dealing with this. fuck
i dont understand why the. they’re not kids anymore now but you know, the main group, isn’t being taken over, i dont think ash lived at the apartments so she could have escaped it but everyone else grew up there. you can’t say it’s not long enough to get infected because maple didn’t live there initially, she moved in with chug later and it still got her. im not sure that it got chug and his daughter. they weren’t in the shadow ooze. but they were faded out and they. were also. among the body count, so. clearly sal believed they were already too far gone
i think this is the first actually clean and well-kept bathroom we ever see in this game, id be happy for them, but, well. you know
NEITHER WAS I
b............beedle juice................
nice
i dont really understand why this style shifting thing is happening, different realities converging or something, i guess, but im into it
“character shifts into other parallel versions of themselves in different styles/travels across different universes” sequences are always my favorite i dont know what you call that or if it counts as a trope but i love it
GOD
DAMN IT
none of us are surviving this, huh. like actually none of us.
I DIDNT KILL HER SHE KILLED HERSELF FOR SOME REASON THAT ONE WASNT MY FAULT
but then she. wasn’t dead and had a new ghost arm that i think was also me. im her haunted arm now its fine we’re fine everything’s fine
FUCKING SHIT HELL WHY
i cant tell if im supposed to know these people or not i think that might be neil though........ probably maple. god. god
for some reason i keep wanting to call maple “willow” where is that coming from
big fan of being able to just smack cultists into bloody puddles with our new ghost arm though that’s very nice
YES THANK YOU I AM AWARE i had a bad time with the controls on half these little final boss mini game things fsjdg
anyway, uh. that sure was a lot of things and i still have no idea what happened at all. i am confused and terrified thats all i can say
i mean. like. this is an incredibly good game its very well written the characters are so real and engaging, the story hits you over and over again right in the fuckin guts, the passage of time and gradual development and change through different points of these peoples’ lives is done so well and its so interesting and unique but at the same time i do not understand a goddamn thing that just happened here
also according to my very depressing episode stats i seem to have missed a shit ton of things, so maybe that’s why. genuinely think im probably just going to immediately start a new game and play it again now that i Know and. well, suffer again, mostly, but also just. try to understand try to figure out what i missed
i think part of the problem is it took me way too long to realize there were occasionally things i could interact with that didn’t specifically. say i could interact with them, i got used to looking for like. the little marker subtitle things that pop up over important objects/etc like “radio” “sal’s room” but sometimes there’s like. a little thing on the ground you can pick up that doesn’t say anything when you stand over it or something and i guess? i must have? missed a lot of those
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Really been loving your fics, we needed more Amelink writers! Thought I'd ask for one if that's alright? So I'd love to see Link proposing to Amelia in a really rushed and imperfect way after he spent the week talking to people like Meredith, Jo, Owen, Webber, etc about hiw they got engaged. He tries to plan something perfect but messes it up somehow and Amelia obviously just laughs and says yes, idk I just wanna see stressed Link, hope this is enough to go off :)
We Find Love
“How did Derek propose?” Link found himself blurting out. Meredith peered over at him. He could see the confusion in her face, despite the surgical mask covering most of it.
“Are you thinking of proposing?” She asked turning back to her sutures.
“Maybe...yes. I think so,” he waved his instrument filled hands awkwardly, obviously flustered.
“Derek proposed in an elevator,” she put simply.
“Why an elevator?” Link asked.
Meredith shrugged. “It was just kind of a special place for us,” he tell she was smiling from her eyes. “It seems so silly now but honestly I was so in love with him that he could’ve done anything. It was perfect.”
“I know me and Amelia haven’t been together for that long, just with the baby on its way...not that that’s a reason. I just—”
“You don’t need to justify yourself,” Meredith interrupted. “When you know, you know.”
“Exactly,” Hayes’ chimed in. Link looked up to the peds surgeon, who he wasn’t aware was following the conversation.
Link placed his lab coat and scrubs in his locker before turning to leave the attending’s lounge.
“Hey,” Owen greeted him as he entered the room.
“Hi,” Link responded.
“You waiting for Amelia?” He asked as he went to open his own locker. Link nodded. “I just saw her get pulled into a surgery. Might be awhile.”
“Oh,” Link responded, as if on cue his phone buzzed with a message from her. “Great.”
Owen chuckled. “The life of two surgeons in a relationship.”
“Hey, how did you propose?” He asked. Owen raised his eyebrows, not expecting the question.
“Uh, which time?” He answered awkwardly. Link shrugged, hoping he hadn’t hit a sensitive spot. “Well my first proposal I just proposed to Cristina on the couch in our living room. It just seemed right and she wasn’t really into the romantic stuff,” he chuckled as if recalling an old memory. “Uh, with Amelia, well she actually proposed to me.” Link shifted uncomfortably in his seat, not aware of this story. “We’d both had past relationships and didn’t really want anything big. With Teddy, it was an on call room. I guess I’m not really the romantic type.” He shrugged. Link recalled Amelia’s story about their honeymoon troubles and believed it. “Are you thinking of proposing?”
“I guess so.” Link grinned.
“Well you’ll be the forth guy to propose to her.” Link tried to hide his surprise. “Weren’t aware of that one? She’s a handle that’s for sure and definitely a runner. That’s why she came to Seattle in the first place.” Owen clapped a hand on Link’s shoulder. “Good luck.”
“What’s up, you look stressed.” Jo slid into the cafeteria seat beside him. “What you got there?” Her eyes widened as she caught sight of it. “Atticus Lincoln, is that a ring box?”
“Jo, shut up,” he shushed her frantically.
“Wow, Shepherd did a number on you. It’s like we’re back in high school,” Jo teased, shoving a spoonful of jello into her mouth. “Yeah, I know it’s nasty. I forgot my lunch,” she explained, replying to his confused look. “So what are you going to do?”
“I don’t know,” he answered defensively, not exactly sure why he was being defensive. “I’ve been trying to get advice.”
“Well it’s not like this is you or Amelia’s first marriage. She probably isn’t expecting anything.”
“I know,” he sighed. “What did Alex do?”
Jo grinned. “He’d set up this whole little romantic dinner and I was going to break up with him.”
“What?” Link exclaimed.
“Yeah, I was all about ultimatums back then. Me or Meredith, all that shit. Anyways, it was sweet and small and perfect.”
“So you didn’t break up with him?”
“No, I figured that once I was his wife he’d have to choose me over Meredith.” She shrugged. “Turns out I like her more than I was expecting to. If you want to talk to the big romantic people you could talk to Jackson. Maybe not the best way but he called of April’s whole wedding to confess his love to her. Arizona proposed to Callie and then they got in a car accident. Less romantic, more catastrophic.
“Who are—”
“And then Teddy proposed to her first husband because he was her patient and didn’t have good health insurance.”
“What?”
“Crazy times happened at this hospital before you came around,” Jo patted his arm. “Look, I know you want to do something nice but she’ll love anything you end up doing.” And with that she headed out of the cafeteria, jello cup in hand.
The next night Link raced to Meredith’s, knowing that Amelia’s shift ended only an hour after his. Maggie had told him to set up at Meredith’s and that he could tell Amelia that they were having a girls night to throw her off. Link was pretty sure Amelia didn’t need ‘throwing off’ but he agreed knowing that Maggie most likely wanted to see Amelia’s reaction.
“What do you mean you aren’t already married, aren’t you having a baby?” Zola asked as Link was frantically setting the table for two. “Mom says that you get married first and then the baby comes after.”
“Well in most cases.” Link answered, glancing over at her. “Hey, Zola stop picking at those flowers.” Referring to the bouquet he’d bought on their way home.
“Sorry,” Zola shrugged. “You’re just making her dinner? What else?”
“I don’t know,” Link mumbled guiltily. “What do you think I should do?”
“I dunno,” Zola answered. “That’s your job.”
“Right,” Link sighed as he tossed the salad and placed the bowl on the table. Suddenly, he heard the front door open. “Do I kneel now?” He asked Zola.
“How am I supposed to know, do I look married to you?” Zola replied. Link decided to kneel, his heart thumping in his chest. His shaky hands reached into his pocket.
“False alarm,” Zola giggled as Meredith entered the room.
“Oh wow,” Meredith laughed. “I’m so flattered.” She mocked fanning her face.
“Shut up,” Link grumbled. “I’ve been trying to get this right all week and I can’t figure out anything to do justice to how much she means to me. I wanted to plan out this big romantic gesture but that just seems dumb and I don’t want to wait any longer. I would marry her right now if I could. I’ve been carrying around this stupid ring all week trying to find a time to give it to her that seemed right but I’m so worried that I’ll screw it up that I back out every time. Like how do I ask her to marry me and sum up all the million things I love about her into such a short amount of time?” He ran a pathetically shaky hand through his hair.
“That’ll do,” Amelia’s soft voice enters the room, her hands circling the swollen bump that recently formed on her abdomen.
“I was about to tell you,” Meredith grinned.
“Are you kidding me?” Link balled his hands in frustration. Meredith grabbed Zola by the hand, the little girl’s eyes wide as if she were watching a special on tv, and dragged her out of the room to give the couple some space. “Amelia, I wanted—”
“Link, this is perfect.” Her eyes scanned the room, softy lit by a couple of candles on the table. A bottle of sparkling water was sitting in a small bath of ice and she smiled as she saw that he’d made all her favourite pregnancy cravings. A sharp aroma drifted through the room and Link seemed to noticed it too.
“I burnt the chicken,” he nodded in disappointment, not even bothering to run to the kitchen in an attempt to salvage it. “This is a nightmare.”
“This is not a nightmare.” Amelia shook her head, wrapping his arms around her waist and pressing a lingering kiss to his lips. “You are absolutely perfect in every way, Atticus Lincoln.” He tried to conceal the blush that was overwhelming his cheeks, feeling like an idiot. “Now do you have a question to ask me or...” she bit her lip with a smile.
“Oh. Yeah!” He knelt down on one knee and glanced up into her deep blue eyes before removing the lid to the little velvet box in her hand. “Amelia Shepherd, from the moment I met you I haven’t spent a day without the thought of you entering my mind. You amaze and inspire me to be a better person and a better surgeon.” He paused as he saw tears begin to build at the edges of her eyes. “You make me so excited to be a father. I mean very scared...but also very excited and I would love to spend the rest of my life raising this child, and maybe other children,” he tried to hide his excitement, “with you. I wan’t to wake up beside you every morning and fall sleep with you in my arms every night. Amelia, will you marry me?”
“Of course,” she answered without hesitation. “And I would reply with the same answer if you’d asked me on our car ride to work or in the middle of surgery.”
“Would that have been better?”
“No, you loser,” she rolled her eyes as he slipped the ring on her finger. “Now come here and give your fiancée some kisses.”
“Do you say that to all of us?” He teased as he fulfilled her request.
sorry this is super shitty but I feel the need to write any prompt im given haha (that makes it sound like i dont like writing prompts but i do!!!) plz keep sending them bc they keep me motivated<3 and thx sm for all the support on my recent fics.
#amelia shepherd#greys abc#amelinkfanfiction#amelinkfanfic#amelinkfic#amelink#atticus lincoln#greys anatomy#jo wilson#meredith grey#owen hunt#teddy altman#maggie pierce#zola shepherd#derek shepherd#merder
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