#if you don’t like it I’d be happy to do another
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Super Grandpa
When Superman first made his debut, people were in awe of him. Children and adults alike held awe and wonder for him. As for elderly, they also loved him. As for why? Because he was like the second coming of Captain Marvel. A super who was the hero during the fourties’ to sixties’. Naturally, other people besides the elderly noticed this too. This led to a theory popping up that Superman was Captain Marvel’s son or grandson. Most people were leaning to grandson though because if he was the Captain’s kid, he’d be at least fifty years old now. Not the twenty something year old guy they know. But yeah, people think they’re related, here’s a couple reasons why.
Supes: *being interviewed*
Lois Lane: *holding a mic up for Clark to speak into* “Superman, who would you say inspired you to become a hero?”
Supes: “Uh- I’d say…” *sounds and looks a little embarrassed* “Captain Marvel? I mean, look at me.” *gestures to himself* “I just have more blue than him. Plus, I mean he was my hero as a kid. I had the power to be like him so I decided to put it to use.”
A lot of people thought that sounded like a little kid talking about their parent being their hero, even though Clark was in all actuality, just talking about Marvel being his hero in general.
or
Wondy and Supes: *meeting each other for the first time*
Wondy: *nostalgic smile* “You know, you remind me of my brother.”
Supes: “Brother?”
Wondy: “He went by Captain Marvel?”
Supes: “Wait, seriously?” *bros ecstatic on the inside*
Wondy: “Yes. You look similar. Your suits are similar. Your ideals are similar. I’m sure you two would’ve gotten along wonderfully.” *sounds sad towards the end*
Supes: “I hope so.”
(This is the Wonder Woman that first came to America during WW2)
or
Supes: “Well, I myself have never met Captain Marvel, but my parents actually met him.”
Flash: “Wait, really? Were are your parents also superheroes?”
Supes: “No, they were normal people. He met them when they were teenagers apparently.”
Flash is over here thinking “Okay, so he might not be his dad, but he could be his uncle or cousin.” As for how the Kents knew Billy, he met them when he stopped them from getting into a car crash.
Then the time bubble popped, and Captain Marvel appeared once again. You couldn’t even ask Clark how he got the man to sit down with him at a diner and eat pie with him.
Marvel: “So you’re a hero too?”
Supes: “Yup. I’m part of the Justice League.” *nervously eating his pie*
Marvel: “What’s that? Are they like the JSA?”
Supes: Yes, sir, some of the members from the team actually joined us after they disbanded.
Marvel: “Sir…? Please don’t call me that. Also, they disbanded?”
Supes: “Yeah, during the 80s I think they disbanded.”
Marvel: “Dang… well at least that’s good.”
Supes: “Why would that be good?”
Marvel: “Oh well, the them disbanding part isn’t good, but the fact that you and others stepped up to create another superhero team that could spread hope throughout the states is incredible.” *smiles*
Supes: *absolutely fangirling inside* “You think so?”
Marvel: “Oh, absolutely.”
or
Marvel and Supes: *teamed up to fight some alien*
After the fight…
Marvel: “Gosh! You were just amazing! I’d love to fight with you again.” *smiles and ruffles his hair, cause he’s so darn tall*
Supes: “You could do that if you join the league, you know?” *internally screaming because his idol just ruffled his hair*
Marvel: “I really should. I’d thought about joining the JSA before the whole… y’know, suspendium.”
Supes: *trying to sound nonchalant* “We’d love to have you.”
People thought Marvel looked like a proud dad while Supes looked so happy to be praised.
So yes, the Marvel and Superman being family theories are strong.
Meanwhile, during all of this, Billy just thinks this guy is a cool dude.
#billy batson#shazam#dc captain marvel#captain marvel dc#fawcett city#fawcett#fawcett comics#superman#clark kent
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40 DAYS AND 40 NIGHTS CHAPTER FIFTEEN
thought i’d be lying if i said ‘i didn’t want you to myself.’ when you look me in my eyes and, tell me that it’s mine, i…
pairing wnba!paige bueckers x singer!oc
taglist @thaatdigitaldiary @ohbueckers @wbbgetsmewetter @rosemariiaa @tndaqlifwy @pboogerswbb @xxloveralways14 @makethemhoesmad @slvt4her @luvapaigeeyy @hedidnotpleaseme @paigesbabygirl @mopopshop @omg-imtumbling @numberonepartyanth3m @wbb4l @authentic-girl03 @slut4uconnwbb @unadulteratedcyclepaper @kplum10 @fuddfanatic35 @avvwritesstufff @paigesluver @bueckersbitch @ryywyd
warnings sexual innuendos, yall are getting edged one last time 🙂↔️
kalena speakss 🪽! it’s finally here, everyone say thank you to sza cs without her album this wasn’t getting done. one more chapter after this one, i can’t believe it mannnnn 🥹
July 2025 — San Diego, California
My hands are sweating more than they have ever before. I sit in silence in the driver's seat of my jeep, the car parked in the driveway. It’s a beautiful house. Costal, and fucking huge. There’s a four car garage and a driveway so big you could probably park two more cars next to mine.
This car ride was definitely eye opening to say the least. In no world would you ever catch me driving more than 30 minutes let alone two hours to see another woman.
I’d only ever do it for Maraye.
She’s heaven sent, just a completely unbelievable human being, and the second she sent that address I was in that car faster than I could blink.
It was always going to be her.
The sound of my foot bouncing on the car floor echos off the walls and I take that as the cue to go inside, I’ve been sitting here forever. I turn off my engine, sticking the keys in the pocket of my shorts before taking a deep breath.
My feet feel heavy as they drag towards the wooden steps. Cedar fills my nose and calms me down, just enough.
The door swings open before I can even touch the handle.
I’m not sure if I should be pissed that Maraye looks so happy or, well, happy for her. She’s glowing, skin tanner than when I last saw her. Her curls look perfect, shiny and bouncy, perfectly framing her face. She got on these striped shorts that leave too much for my imagination and a USC Trojans cropped shirt. (Remind me to burn that.)
“You didn’t show up.”
I’m instantly taken aback by the immediate comment. My eyebrows furrow and I blink back my confusion.
“I—Huh?”
“My show. I wanted you there and you didn’t come.” She elaborates, crossing her arms over her chest and suddenly I’m losing focus and staring right there.
I can’t help the laugh that escapes my throat, a smile spreads across my face. “That’s what you wanna talk to me ‘bout? Really?”
Maraye frowns, adjusting her position on her foot. I know she’s trying to look upset, and she probably is, but that fucking pout of her lips is the cutest thing I think I’ve ever seen.
“I’m sorry I wasn’t there.” I admit. “But y’know we should prolly talk about something else.” My eyes squint as I look over her body. Just briefly I notice a crack in her demeanor. The sternness of her eyes slips and her lip just barely quivers. It’s like she just now realized that me being here meant talking about it.
We have to. I don’t think I’d be able to go to Indiana, knowing that she’s in the stands without knowing if she hates my guts or not.
Raye sighs, but it comes off more as a deep breath. Her arms drop to her sides and she moves from the doorway, giving just enough room for me to step inside.
She doesn’t say a word, just walking into the house like there’s nothing more to say. But I follow her anyway, looking like a lost puppy and staring at her so hard I damn near forget to lock the door.
This house is way bigger than I thought it would be, I swear I walked past a game room and a gym within three seconds of one another. It has an older style, hardwood floors and cream carpets. The lighting is dim and aside from the natural light that comes from the windows, the chandeliers from the ceiling illuminate the room with a yellow light.
After what feels like hours of walking, she stops, opening another door and revealing the balcony.
“Your grandma had nice taste. This place is crazy.” I comment, looking slightly shocked. I knew the places in San Diego were nice but goddamn.
Raye lets out a breathy laugh, approaching the outdoor seating area. It’s dark, but the fireplace that glows bright orange and yellow is more than enough for her to see me and for me to see her. She sits down without a word and I do too, right next to her on the off-white colored couch.
I can feel the warmth that radiates off her body, almost hotter than the fire itself. She crosses her legs under her as she sits and the movement of her thighs sends me into orbit.
“I’m not gonna say anything.” She speaks up, looking at me with her tongue trailing over her bottom lip.
I look at her incredulously. “Really? You ain’t gonna say shit?”
Maraye nods slowly. “Last time I saw you, I didn’t let you talk. So I’m lettin’ you talk now, you have the floor.” She gestures to the space in front of us. “I promise.”
“You swear?”
She makes a big show of zipping her lips and tossing the imaginary key behind her and it’s things like that, that make me crazy over her. The theatrics and the laughs, she’s so unapologetically herself around me all the time, even when I piss her off and she wants to put my head on a platter.
“I swear.” She smiles, turning her full attention to me.
I clear my throat, suddenly feeling the pressure of this whole situation on my shoulder again. She’s the only person in the world that without fail makes my head empty. Raye looks at me, and within seconds I’ve lost everything that I’ve been practicing on saying in the car.
“Um. Fuck,” I sigh, shaking my head. “Ion even have a fuckin’ excuse for you. I jus’— I fucked up. Drank too much, saw her, I thought you were with Julian, and I made a big mistake, Raye.”
—
Hearing Paige say all that, made my throat tighten and my chest get all heavy all over again, the same way it did when I found out everything two weeks ago.
She can’t even look at me as she speaks, and that alone lets me know she’s telling the truth. That she feels bad, maybe even worse than what she says.
“You got every right to be mad at me.” She admits, she takes a breath with every few words. It’s like she’s having a shortcoming just by trying to apologize.
A small part of me is happy to see her all stressed out like this, as if I think she deserves it. But I also fucking hate watching her struggle to get her words together. Normally she’s so confident, it’s the first time I think I’ve ever seen her so unsure of herself.
“I’m so sorry for everything. I always told you that you have a right to be upset or get emotional about things that people say, ‘cause you’re always thinkin’ you don’t get that luxury when you do.” Paige plays with her hands and it’s then when I notice the silver band on her pinky finger. “But as soon as you got mad at me, I told you that you don’t have a right to be mad.”
I nod, remembering it all. The downside of remembering everything is that I had to relive every word that she said to me that day when I woke up and when I went to bed and even in my sleep.
“Paige it’s—”
“Nah, you said I have the floor, right? Swore you weren’t gon’ say shit.” She points at me with one finger, her other pointer finger over her lips. Very obviously telling me to shut up, and I do.
I can’t help but smile at her. I think even now, with her hair in that messy ass bun and the purple star patch on her chin, she’s the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.
“You got every right in the world to be mad at me, because what I did to you was unforgivable.” Paige finally looks up at me and I think I’m about to drown in those eyes. “I made you cry, Raye. I’d never seen you cry before and I’m never gonna forget that shit. I’m so fuckin’ sorry.”
I sniffle a little at her words. Hearing it from her lips while she looks at me is completely different from over the phone.
I’m actually very glad that I waited this long, because the silence on my end completely aids in making sure I listen. Like actually listening, I’m not thinking of a rebuttal, or a way to defend myself, I’m just listening. Taking it all in.
Paige runs a hand over her chin. I know that action. She does it whenever she’s frustrated, or thinking, I don’t think she’s ever done it before with me; other than when she’s trying to get in my pants. But she does it all the time in her postgame interviews.
“I can’t go this long without speakin’ to you, Raye. You just… you’re so much different than anyone I’ve ever met. You’re fuckin’ special and— I wanna try this. Us.”
It’s certain, the most certain I’ve heard Paige be since she sat down. “If y’ont want that it’s fine too. We can be friends, or even fuckin’ acquaintances, I just— I can’t imagine my life without you in it. You left your mark, permanently.”
My breath hitches. I can’t imagine my life without you in it. She doesn’t even stutter when she says that, and it brings tears to my waterline. I already know I’m falling for every word she says.
I do it because she looks at me like I’ve hung the moon and the stars. Her body is even closer to mine than it was before, I can see every single shift in the blue of her eyes, every ridge of her face, I can point each brown eyelash on her eyes. I’d fall for any and everything she said if it meant I had her here. Close like this.
“You uh, you told me that I don’t know you. And I think you’re wrong.” It takes me aback briefly. I wasn’t expecting it from her, especially not right now. “I know what makes you smile, how to make you laugh, how to get on your nerves.”
I roll my eyes at Paige instantly. So hard that they were probably a few millimeters away from getting stuck in the back of my head.
She laughs, that full, high pitched laugh that I’ve missed so fucking bad. “I mean you got a point. Ion know where your parents are from or your favorite show or how you like your coffee. Or if you even like coffee. Do you? I’m getting distracted.
“—I do like coffee—” I butted in briefly, any attempt to ease her obvious growing anxiety.
“—But I know enough to know that I want you and only you. You’re it for me, Raye. And I swear to God I’ll do right by you if you give me a chance. Teach me how to be your person and I’ll teach you.”
Paige sighs and I let a similar one slip from my lips too.
“Jus’ please. I’m sorry.”
My heart feels heavy with everything she’s just said to me. I know I should forgive her, every bone in my body wants me too.
Then there’s that small part of me that doubts her just a bit. It’s the same part that creates an image of her and that girl almost everyday, the same part that doesn’t allow me to give people second chances.
I don’t even notice the tear that slipped until I’m dropping my head in my hands and I feel it. My palms run across the expanse of my face. “I can talk now?” I tease.
“Yeah, ma. You can.” Paige shakes her head in pure amusement, not even trying to fight off the grin on her face.
“It’s so hard to stay mad at you when you say shit like that.” I groan. “Ion give people second chances, Paige. Y’know that.”
“Technically, you didn’t give me a real first chance ‘cause you had a boyfriend.” She says pointedly, bobbing her hands as if she’s trying to convince me of my options. “Can you forgive me?”
“I don’t know.”
“You wan’ me to get on my knees? I’ll do it, I’ll beg.”
I’m laughing but Paige is completely serious, slipping off the cushion and looking at me expectantly.
“Y’ont have t—”
But she’s already doing it, sinking to her knees below the couch and looking up at me with that damn pout of hers. “—Please, Raye. Gimme another chance, angel. I’ll do anything. Please?”
There’s no one here but me and her, yet the sight of her on her knees is enough to make me burst out in that kind of embarrassed laughter. “Can you get up?” I grit through my teeth.
“Girl, I’m on my knees!” Paige sings horrendously, and I roll my eyes again at her song reference. No way this girl thought she was gonna sing some Lloyd to convince me.
“Shut up and stand up, Madison.” I say again, attempting to pull her up by her biceps that have definitely gotten bigger in these last few weeks.
“Answer me first.”
“Yes, yes okay. I forgive you, just get up!” I giggle, covering my eyes with my palm until I feel the cushion dip beside me. “Oh my God, you’re not real.” I mumble, finally dropping my hand to see how proud she is of herself.
“C’mere.” She instructs with a smile, opening her arms and I waist maybe a second of time before I’m turning and wrapping my arms around her neck.
Her shampoo wafts through the night air and straight to my nose, the cool zipper of her grey tech jacket against my stomach makes me jump a little bit, but she holds me there, tight to her body with her head in my neck.
“I fuckin’ missed you, dude.” Paige inhales. Only she could go from being sappy to calling me dude all in the same breath. It’s so uniquely Paige.
“I missed you too.” I sigh, breathing in her scent again.
I don’t think I want to let go. Because she’s here, hugging me like I could run away at any fucking minute, running her thumb over the open space on my back that my crop top is giving her.
I pull back to gaze at her. That look she used to give me all the time before we even started anything, it’s there. A slight lift of the apples of her cheeks and her pupils dilated like I swore they did back then. Only this time I don’t have to think it, I know it. I see it.
I trail my hands to her cheeks, my thumb over her bottom lip. And then suddenly I’m licking mine and leaning into her.
Except Paige pulls back before we get the chance to touch.
“You don’t wanna kiss me? Really?”
She chuckles, “no I do, trust me. I really really want to. But if I kiss you, I’m gonna wanna do so much more.”
“Oh so know y’ont wanna fuck me? Paige—”
“Damn, shout it from the rooftops then!” Her eyebrows furrow at my sudden vulgarity and she leans towards me more. “Trust, I wanna do a lot of that. I just wanna take you on a date more.” Paige smiles and she looks awfully proud of herself for the cute suggestion.
It is cute. The way her cheeks flush in nervousness. I let the blonde pull me into her lap fully, adjusting me perfectly on her lap. Her hands run distractingly on my thighs, so much so that I almost forget to respond to her.
“Can I take you out on a date?”
I nod almost in a trance.
“You wanna use your words, ma?”
“Uh huh.”
“You do? Y’wanna say yeah?” She’s teasing me, and finding amusement in it too.
“Yes. You can take me out.” I blink, slapping a hand against her shoulder, and then again when I hear that god awful cackle escape her. “You’re so annoying.”
Paige licks her lips, not taking a single second to look away from me as I loll my head down to face her. “Tomorrow night, after the three point? You are still goin’ to Indy, right?”
“I am. That sounds perfect, Paige.” I grin, leaning over to ghost my lips across her cheek.
I can’t help but do it again. Her skin is so soft and warm, a near perfect spot for my lips to meet over and over again until Paige is humming and tossing her head back in an attempt to keep a respectful distance. It’s cute that she doesn’t trust herself this much. Even cuter that I’m doing practically nothing and she’s falling victim to me.
“Ion know if you got the memo, but this is st—ill kissing.” She groans, pushing at my hips.
I grip her chin in my hand, pulling back just enough to turn her head in the other direction and place kisses there. “Mmm no s’not. Our lips ain’t even close.”
And I continue this for a while, my lips on her cheeks, her jaw, ghosting over the corner of her lips in hopes of making her give in to me like she’s done many times before in the past. Paige surprised me though, standing her ground.
When I look back, her bottom lip is wet and swollen. My guess from biting it too many times. She’s breathless, and anyone else would’ve thought I’d just made her finish right here.
“I— I need to get back home. I got a flight at four.” Paige mumbles, darting her tongue over her lips.
I frown. “Fly with me from here, then.”
“My bags are at home, ma. And aren’t you flyin’ out private?” She questions, sending a pinch to my hip.
“Yes… so? I’ll call and reroute from LAX and you can come with me.” I shrug as if it’s that simple, and it probably could be if I call the right people.
Paige smirks that infamous fucking smirk. “Ion do small planes, angel. You know this. S’cute that you wanna be with me that bad, tho.”
I cross my arms over my chest, pouting. “Please, please, please?”
—
July 2025 — Somewhere over Nevada
I need to find some kind of ground to stand on when It comes to this woman.
My hands clutch my armrests, eyes squeezed shut, and head tossed back.
I’m not scared of heights. Before anyone starts thinking that. I’m scared of tiny ass planes and not enough people on them. It was fine when we were on the ground, but the second the flight attendants were out of view and I had to get strapped in I almost shit myself.
“Paige, you can relax.” I hear Maraye giggle from in front of me, her feet resting in my lap to attempt to ground me. It worked out a little, then she started fucking around and nudging her heel a little too close to my core and all of a sudden I was trying to distract myself from something other than the plane. “P?”
“What?”
The sound of her seat belt clinging cuts through the silence, and then her feet are leaving my body and instead I feel her; all of her. Raye grips my hands, peeling the from the arms of the chair. My eyes shoot open at the contact.
“What the hell are you doin’? Sit down.” I tell her, slightly tripping out over this flight some more.
She gets smart, straddling my lap and sitting on it rather than in her seat. I let out a groan because I know that any other time I’d be all over this shit. Since last night, after I told her I was holding out at least until our date, she’s made a very big show of trying to get me to fold.
First on the drive back to LA, her hand drawing patterns on my free hand, or reaching over to play with my hair. She had perfect hands. Long, slender, fingers with a shade of deep royal purple manicured on her nails. They’re fucking soft too, prefect enough to distract me while I was driving. I couldn’t help but think about how they’d feel inside me. Or circling my clit, feeling my wetness from her alone. That’s how I knew I was in so deep, when I was thinking about Raye fucking me numb just from her touching my hand.
She was talking some crazy shit too, which on any other occasion I’d be willing to handle that. But I was serious. Our relationship wasn’t going to be started on the basis of sex. I wanted to do it right. She slept In my guest bedroom because I knew If we shared a bed we wouldn’t be sleeping. Rather anything but that.
The car ride this morning was similar. Which made me realize she wasn’t doing all this just to prove a point, but because she needed me. When she told me she’d had a dream about me, told me all the details in which that dream entailed, I was about to make her wish come true and get on the floor of the passenger seat and shove my tongue so deep inside her that she saw stars. And I knew she would’ve enjoyed every minute because Raye let me know from her own mouth that she would.
Which made my brief period of celibacy nearly impossible.
She’s also not wearing clothes.
Well, she is, but not really. Her top is tiny, a sliver of fabric that barely covers her tits and shorts that ride up as soon as she gets comfortable on my lap.
“You wanna yell at me like that again?” Raye looks at me crazy, a bite of her lip and a tilt of her head that makes my entire body melt into a puddle in this seat.
“You so freaked out.” I groan, hold her hips in place. “Why the hell did I let you convince me to do this shit.” I wonder aloud trying to avoid looking out the window, noticing the obvious racing of my heart. Except I don’t know if it’s because of the plane of because of her ass pressing up on me. Her hips grinding on mine, her covered cunt dragging across the seam of my shorts.
She shrugs while trailing a finger down the obvious vein in my neck. “I dunno. You could’ve told me no.”
The slight movement pushed her tits even closer to my face and I know I’m about to either pass out or take her right here. Spread her out, rip these tiny ass pieces of fabric off her body, and drive my fingers inside her until she’s falling apart for every crew member of this plane to hear.
“Killin’ me here, ma. Move over a lil bit.” I ask, clutching a hand at her side, stilling her as much as I can and running my thumb over her ribcage. That’s where I finally see it. That damned tattoo that had me reeling on my bedroom floor last night.
John 13:7.
I think it’s the worst time for it to be staring at me, mostly because I’m thinking some very not-so-holy thoughts. She’s testing every bit of my resolve at the moment, I was confident in my ability to hold out, but we have maybe two more hours before landing, and Maraye looks like she’s going to make me work for it the whole time.
Raye catches me staring, and she pushes a stand of hair out of her own face. “You like it?”
I nod wordlessly. Every single part of her is mesmerizing. All the ink, and then that brown of her skin is addicting. Tan lines peeking out of that tube top and up out of the waistband of her shorts.
I dig into my own shorts, pulling my phone out of my pocket before flipping the screen towards her. The same bible quote on my lock screen almost as if it was fate.
She smiles, pressing her hands to my shoulder and laughing breathily. “We're just on the same wavelength, huh?” Raye asks, I’m about to answer when she presses down harder on my lap, testing every single bit of self control I have left with just one simple movement.
“Mmhmm. Same shit, baby.”
#sierrale8ne#kalena’s works ୧ ‧₊˚ 🍵 ⋅#paige bueckers#paige bueckers smut#paige bueckers x oc#uconn wbb#la sparks#lesbian#my fic#40 days and 40 nights
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The end of 2024 has proven that 2025 seems to be a huge year for donghua and I’m gripping everyone to give all these donghua besides just the most popular ones a chance!!!:
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Link Click, Yingdu arc: releasing December 27, 2024
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Nezha 2, sequel to Nezha 2019 aka Nezha zhi motong jiangshi, confirmed for January 2025
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To Be Hero X, likely April 2025 release (I hope people will also support the version with Chinese VAs! 🙏)
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Lord of the Mysteries, 2025 summer release—accompanied by more good news: the novel has officially entered the British Library and it will also be translated into English by Yen Press
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False Memory, series version, confirmed 2025 release
I am making this post because False Memory just released its new trailer and I am very much so looking forward to it! The series started as an indie short before growing into a bigger thing, much like Fog Hill of Five Elements and The Legend of Luo Xiaohei and Alita’s Trial. We’ve thus been waiting a couple years for news so this is really exciting, especially after it recently got a Twitter account!!
Bonuses:
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Ya She, released a couple months ago but late enough into 2024 I’d still love for more people to check it out!
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Scissor Seven, another one that’s had its newest season out for a while now, but I assume that for those who have Netflix, it hasn’t been officially English subbed or dubbed yet. We’re also still getting trailers for its game!:
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I Am What I Am 2, released Dec 14, 2024 in China!
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Reminder that Mo Dao Zu Shi is now on Crunchyroll! They may have removed it from Tencent’s donghua YouTube channel for this, so definitely go support it if you do have Crunchyroll!
Some children’s donghua have also recently released, including news of the new Balala the Fairies season and the other magical girls show, Rainbow Crew! The latter is confirmed for an official release in English.
The Yi Ren Zhi Xia game is also coming soon to global, and Fox Spirit Matchmaker even updated their OP recently after quite a long time of silence.
And speaking of silence, even the long-awaited SVSSS donghua saw some movement recently!?
Now if I could get a confirmed 2025 release for White Cat Legend season 3 (and maybe God Troubles Me and Lie Huo Jiao Chou and Fei Ren Zai and All Saints Street and The Legend of Luo Xiaohei and Wo Jia Dashixiong Naozi You Keng etc…)), I could die a happy man (gender-neutral)—after watching all of these newly released donghua shows and films and seasons, of course ahaha. 🙏
For more news and info on donghua, you can check here:
There’s a bunch of new donghua information in the above document that came from 2024, even though they don’t have official release dates yet! Including but not limited to:
The announcement and PV of Call-Up Girls, based on a baihe manhua
The announcement of a Nirvana in Fire donghua, based on the danmei novel with a famous cdrama adaptation (with the manhua having recently gotten an official English license via Aloha Comics)
Trailer and announcement for 《向火而生》, based on Shui Qian Cheng’s danmei novel Blazing Armour
More announcements for Jing Wei Qing Shang, based on the popular baihe novel
Trailer for The Story of Rong Song, a spin-off of the famous Big Fish and Begonia movie
and many, many more…!
Hope everyone can join me in watching more donghua for 2025!! :D
#Youtube#donghua#anime#<- I always kind of hate doing this but…for the exposure… *clenches fist*#animation#indie animation#chinese animation#manhua#kuku88#kuku rambles#link click#nezha#nezha zhi motong jiangshi#to be hero x#lord of the mysteries#lord of mysteries#false memory#ya she#scissor seven#I am what I am#mo dao zu shi#balala the fairies#yi ren zhi xia#fox spirit matchmaker#call-up girls#nirvana in fire#blazing armour#188男团#jing wei qing shang#big fish and begonia
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okay, so i'm here for a an ask for each of your cutesy celebration, so be ready for a little spam ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧
first, since you seem a bit cold so lemme wrap you with a
🧣scarf with Sirius and could the prompt be "wanna cuddle? you know, just to keep warm." and "so, how much longer do you plan on using me as your personal space heater?" from the cold prompts
love you very very much, san (๑>◡<๑)
ivy, my love! here's your scarf, thank you so much for the request <333 🧣
forever | s.b.
— "Wanna cuddle? You know, just to keep warm." & "So, how much longer do you plan on using me as your personal space heater?"
sirius black x reader
summary: you're cold, and you're in love with sirius
tw: smoking, fluff
Sirius sighs and tips his head back, wisps of delicate smoke rising from his lips. You knew angels would fawn over his loveliness if they could see him like this. He brings the cigarette away from his mouth, catching your stare with a smile. “No cigarettes in the house, I know.”
“I’d really prefer no cigarettes at all, but yeah, that’s the bare minimum,” you murmur, placing his mug of coffee on the table before curling up on the other end of the couch with yours.
Sirius was at your place for the holidays. Your roommate was out for the week, and you hated spending Christmas, or anything really, alone. James was back home with family and Remus was celebrating it with his girl. That left Sirius. Just Sirius, which did awful things to your heart.
He flashes you another grin, and this time has the dignity to look at least slightly apologetic. He doesn’t snuff the cigarette out. You don’t ask him to.
You lean back with your gaze on him, holding your breath so as to not inhale anything you wouldn’t want to. Sirius stares back at you.
“What?”
“Nothing! Just —“ you exhale, scrunching up your face. “At least blow it away from me?”
“But then I can’t look at your pretty face,” he retorts, tilting his head teasingly.
Your heart twists someway crummy behind your ribs. “Sirius.”
“Okay, okay,” he huffs out, shifting slightly so he’s facing the television. “Happy?”
“Very. Thank you,” you mutter, rolling your eyes when he chuckles and shakes his head.
A couple of minutes pass by, a comfortable silence falling over the two of you. He stares at the wall; you at him. Sirius is always pretty – but prettier like this. You know it’s impossible, but his cheekbones seem to soften when the smoke leaves his pale lips. His eyes flutter shut when he sighs.
You feel your heart swell a little, like the poisoned gas he’s blowing out is filling you up in the shape of love.
Sirius catches you. “What now?”
“Nothing.”
You pause. Christmas was tomorrow. A few other friends would be coming over, and you’d lose Sirius in the sea of them. He’d pack his bags and leave the next morning, and you’d lose him from your apartment. But you had him today. His heart sat unguarded, in plain sight. Maybe he had girls left, right and centre latching their claws onto it the moment he stepped out. But for tonight, you could take it with the tips of your fingers, hold it in the palm of your hands and cradle it close to yours.
“Actually,” you speak up. Sirius startles, looking back around at you curiously.
“Do you wanna…” you clear your throat, smoke from his pretty lips blowing over you like a fog. A fog you’d love to get lost in. “Wanna cuddle? You know, just to keep warm.”
He looks confused for a moment, and you’re sure you’ve screwed it up. Sirius was never going to come over again, and he’d warn Remus and James not to either. You were going to end up a loner with a broken heart.
“Sure.”
You blink, surprised. “Huh?”
Sirius smiles, and it’s every lovely word you could ever think of. “I said sure. Get over here, babe.”
It should’ve been embarrassing how quickly you crawled over to him, but you can’t feel it right now, every little bit of your heart taken up by some form of love. The fat of your thigh melds into his as you press up to him cross legged.
Sirius is always gentle with his touch, but somehow kinder now. He snuffs the cigarette out in the ashtray on the table; the one you bought just because he always came over. He curls his palm around the curve of your hip, and you think maybe that’s what your love handles were for, for him to love.
“You good?”
I’m more than good, I’m happy. I love you. “Yeah.”
“Good,” he murmurs, pulling you impossibly closer. You’d say your heart was doing flips; but you can’t feel it from how hard you’re squished up against him. You let yourself close your eyes.
You stay like that for a while. Sirius is thinking about warming you up, you are thinking about how much love he had to have for you, to let you hug him on a random Tuesday and hold you like you’re fragile. Too much love. Not as much as you, though, you’re sure of it.
“So,” Sirius starts softly, as soft as his touch where he’s rubbing your hip. “How much longer do you plan on using me as your personal space heater?”
There’s an undertone of teasing you decide to ignore. It’s laden with love, and love is all you need. “As long as you’ll allow.”
“Hm,” he muses, lips quirking up as he wraps his other arm around your waist too. It’s your lucky day, you think. “My arms have no curfew, sweetheart. They’re content to hold you as long as you please.”
You smile. Sirius can’t see it, but he can feel it. You mumble something incoherent as you turn your face into his chest, but it sounds suspiciously like forever.
san's christmas sleepover
#san's christmas sleepover#san knits scarves 🧣#sirius black x reader#sirius black fanfiction#sirius black x you#sirius black x fem!reader#sirius black x y/n#sirius black fic#sirius black fluff#sirius black drabble#sirius black one shot#sirius black#sirius black imagine#marauders#marauders era#the marauders x reader#marauders fanfiction#marauders x y/n#marauders x you#marauders x reader#the marauders fanfiction#the marauders#the marauders era#the marauders fic#the marauders fandom#harry potter marauders#marauders fic#marauders fandom#marauders fluff#hp marauders
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happy disaster
rockstar!eddie x fem!waitress!reader (imperfect for you universe)
summary: how you two meet
author's note: an ask about how they met came earlier today and i couldn't help myself lol. not proofread sorry! also this could be read as a standalone! but u can read the og part here! hope u guys enjoy lmk what yall think xoxo
word count: 3.1k
You’ve had your fair share of jobs throughout the last few years, trying to make ends meet while also being a consumer of the various cute things you see when you’re at the mall with your friends. One time (and this may have been one of the more miserable experiences), you worked as a receptionist for an auto shop (get it now?)).
Needless to say, you were at the bottom of the hierarchy at that whole joint. When you weren’t answering calls and taking hyperspecific notes to not confuse the actual mechanics, you were practically shunned from the moment you stepped up from your seat and onto the street to eat your lunch at the bench outside. And whenever your lips did part to make even the simplest of comments, the men either laughed at you or made you feel stupid (“You guys hired me! Clearly I’m not a fucking idiot!” you dreamt of saying, but you were just never one for the dramatics and confrontation of it all).
And, the worst part, on days you couldn’t go into work, none of the other receptionists would switch with you.
(“Sorry, babe, I just can’t,” you remember Joey Warner staying after taking a drag of his cig, coughing mere seconds later from not exhaling immediately. You wanted to take the cigarette between your fingers, toss it down, and squish it with your shoes. You really needed to pick up your brother from school, and no one at the shop is ever up Joey’s ass since he’s a guy.
“Oh. It’s alright.” You curse yourself and your lack of ever wanting conflict, because you’re more than positive that this boy deserves a beating for not taking the reins for an hour just so that your poor baby brother won’t have to wait on the cold sidewalk for your mom, who is forty minutes late.
You walk back into the shop without another word.)
So. yeah, call this mechanic memory useless, but now it's clear that your jobs have been absolute dog shit in the past.
But being a waitress at Carly’s Diner, in comparison, takes the cake in the coworker camaraderie contest.
Like, now, you’re enjoying your break with Carrie, splitting half a cupcake that Jim managed to slip into your guys’ hands when he was pulling the fresh desserts from the oven. You two have turns at it, taking nimble bites from the vanilla confection and wiping rainbow sprinkles off your uniform in the process. Your nose blends in the smell of the cupcake and Carrie’s sweet perfume, leaving a little bubble where you can hardly tell what the boys in the kitchen are whipping up right now.
Judy passes through the doors in a haste, heaving before setting her eyes on you two. The notepad in her hands is crumpled up and her hair looks all over the place, eyes bewildered as she stalks towards you and Carrie, a complan ready to spill from her red lips.
“This fucking couple on table three is driving me nuts! Nuts!” She slumps her back against the wall and swipes a piece of frosting off the cupcake before sticking it in her mouth, sighing in relief.
“Hey,” Carrie swats Judy’s hand, “watch the cupcake!” She places it behind her back possessively.
Carrie is nearly six months pregnant and craving every sweet treat Jim has to offer in between tables and shifts. It’s a miracle that she let you split the dessert with her just now, “And table three, you said?”
Judy ignores her earlier words and nods. “I swear to God, I don’t understand your goddamn generation and why you heaps are so fucking rude. I can't do this.”
“Don’t group us with those weirdos,” says Carrie. “And I’d like to see them be rude to a pregnant woman. Protect this,” she hands you the cupcake carefully, looking at you in the eyes with intent, “and I mean it.”
Her voice is so determined, you decide that you don’t want your fair share of bites anymore. You nod dutifully.
“I got this, Jude.” She swipes the notepad from the older woman’s hands.
And with that, Carrie is kicking herself off the wall and out of the kitchen, into the main part of the diner. You silently pray for the couple that now has to deal with a moody and pregnant Carrie.
See? Now, this is what you mean! No mechanic or receptionist at Billy’s Auto Parts will ever be willing to face an alleged-annoying couple for their coworker. Sometimes, waitressing can take the light and happiness out of you once you’re clocked out, but at least you’re surrounded by the half-decent people in your town.
“You’re a lifesaver!” Judy calls out with a wicked laugh. “Gotta love that girl… hey can I have a bite?”
You frown, knowing you’re already unable to say no when Judy is stressed and you know for sure that the confection in your hand is enough to sweeten even the most stressed—Jim just has that magic to him. “Yeah, but don’t make the dent obvious.”
You think you’re gonna spend the rest of your break with Judy, hiding in between the two walls in the corner of the kitchen until Carrie comes back. You lick a small sprinkle off the cupcake, ready to ask the woman if her daughter won the spelling bee that she’s been freaking out over all week, when the office door swings open and Lenny’s head peeks out, eyes going to the first two waitresses that he can spot.
“Hey!” he shouts yours and Judy’s last names to steal the attention. “Can one of you guys go out and get Evan? Her daughter’s principal is on the phone.” He wipes his sweat-stained brow and doesn’t wait for a response. “Thanks,”
You and Judy look back at each other. And immediately you know that you’re not going to make Judy be the one.
“I got it,” you say with a soft smile. “... You’re gonna eat the rest of this are you?”
She laughs and swipes the cupcake. “For you, my love, I wouldn’t dream of it. Thank you.”
You blow her a kiss, already making your way to the double doors of the kitchen, straightening out your ponytail and getting your waitressing voice ready (patient and respectful, garnering the best tips you can try to get). Your eyes give one swipe across the diner, catching Carrie’s eye as she talks to the couple sitting down beneath her, holding her precious bump to make a show of it. She gives you a sly wink and you bite your lip to stop yourself from laughing.
Afternoon rush makes it hard to spot Evan at first. His smaller stature makes it even harder to spot him in the crowd, but your eyes eventually zone in on him smiling at customer that is blocked by a family getting up to leave. You smile upon finding him and make your way to the table.
As you get closer, you finally notice who Evan is speaking two, and your brows pinch quizzically. The man is hunched, looking over the menu with sunglasses adorning his face despite his table not even facing the sun. His jet black curls curve around the lines of his face, making his features harder to notice. It almost reminds you of the movies you watch late at night when you’re munching on diner leftovers on your couch, the runaway criminal stopping for a bite to eat while trying to flee the state.
“Evan,” you say softly, not wanting to draw attention to yourself but you know it's already bound to happen since you’re switching places with him. “Lenny’s got your daughter’s school on the phone. They’re asking for you.”
The man’s eyes widen. “Great,” he mutters, “What do you think it is this time?” “I hope she said ‘fuck you’ to that little pipsqueak again,” you joke, seeing the anxiety in Evan’s eyes at not knowing why he’s receiving a call during work. You remember the first time he got called to his daughter’s school from work due to her cursing out an older boy: the entire kitchen was laughing—Evan included—as they all wished him good luck with that meeting. “Can’t be worse than that.”
He sighed, turning back to the customer, “I’m sorry for the inconvenience, but I’m going to hand you off to her for a bit.” He says your name to further introduce you two. "Thank you for your patience.”
And for the first time up close, you look at the sunglassed man and smile. Perfect teeth flash at you, mildly astonishing you at how cute he looked when he did so. It’s not abnormal for you to find a customer attractive (it’s human, we’re human), but you don’t think a smile has ever made you secretly stop you from breathing for a second.
Flustered, you’re clumsy as you and Evan switch spots. He pats your shoulder one last time, muttering a thank you as he rushes to the back. You follow his movements and frown for a split second and forget your task at hand. You hope his daughter is okay. You hope the kitchen will be laughing in t-minus three minutes over the fact that little baby-Evan gained a new curse word under her belt.
“Sorry,” you say, looking back at the man. You find him looking directly at you, knowing only because of how his head is positioned. His sunglasses are too tinted to even see a little beneath. “Can I start you off with anything to drink?”
“Oh—uh, yeah,” he stammers, before clearing his throat and offering a crooked smile. “Coffee, please. Milk and two sugars.”
Your handwriting matches the pace as he speaks. You hold a smile on your face to keep up pleasantries. “And have you decided what you would like to eat?”
“Not yet,” he admits, his fingers fidgeting with the edge of the menu. “Kind of hard to focus.” There’s a pause before he adds, a little quieter, “The menu’s got a lot of… options.”
You raise an eyebrow, tucking your notepad in the small pocket of your apron. You turn your head to see if anyone else is making coffee right now. You see Carrie there, and silently celebrate when she’s already staring at you. “All good. I’ll get your coffee ready and be right back–”
“—Wait.”
Your brows pinch, confused. “Yes?” His hand rubs the back of his neck, a flicker of hesitation crossing his face. “I was just, um… wondering if you had a favorite on the menu? Like… if there’s something you always recommend. Or—” He hesitates again, “Or like your favorite?”
You don’t know why he's so flustered. You don’t know why it makes you flustered. For a beat, you just look at him. Is he… trying to flirt with me? The thought isn’t unwelcome, but you certainly weren’t expecting it, or really believing it just yet. You tilt your head, trying your best to keep your expression neutral.
“Well,” you say eventually, “We have an all day breakfast, and that’s my favorite part of the menu, and I get it a lot. It’s on the next page.”
You wait for him to turn the menu, but he continues to stare back up at you, mouth agape.
“... Is that something you’re interested in?” you ask, breaking the silence.
“Yes,” he replies immediately. And then, more composed, “Yeah, I can be in the mood for breakfast.” He finally flips the page, and his head tilts up to yours fleetingly.
“Great! Our cook, Jim, makes the best strawberry and white chocolate pancakes, so that’s what I would recommend from the breakfast menu.”
His lips tug into a small, bashful smile. “Sounds perfect. I’ll take that.”
“Perfect!” you grin, scribbling his order onto your notepad. “I’ll take this to the kitchen, and have your coffee ready soon!” You flash him one more look before retreating back towards the kitchen. You finally get to look back at Carrie, who is still looking at you, this time arms crossed.
“How was the couple?” you ask when you’re about to pass her.
“Annoyed them enough to leave.” She grabs your wrist, and you just dodge the yelp that wants to escape your lips. “Do you know who you were just talking to?”
You freeze. Her grip is firm, her expression serious enough to make you hesitate. Your gaze darts briefly toward the dining area, but you stop yourself from looking back at him. The last thing you want to do is risk being caught gawking.
“I... no?” you whisper, unsure of how to answer. But even as you say it, you feel a subtle heat creeping up your neck. The weight of eyes on your back makes your skin prickle, as if the mystery man somehow knows he’s the topic of conversation.
“Why don’t you go check the newspaper in the locker room and get back to me, yeah?” she finally lets her grip go, smirking like she knows something you don’t.
Carrie's words linger repeatedly in your brain as you hesitantly allow yourself to drop off the man’s order, and then to go see whether or not you’re serving a serial killer.
You slip the stripped paper from your notepad to Colin’s hands. “Table thirteen,” you say in passing as you make the rest of the way to the locker room, not even Judy’s cheerful wave as she smiles with a cupcake still in her hand can stop you from the mission you have decided to go on.
Upon entering the locker room, you gaze zeroes in newspaper lying flat on the bench, its closed pages teasing you with potential revelations about your current customer. You hesitantly flip it over as you come face-to-face with the front headline
HIT AND DIP: ROCKSTAR EDDIE MUNSON LEAVES IN HASTE AFTER CHICAGO SHOW
Your eyes widen as they lock onto the grainy photo accompanying the article. There’s no mistaking it. The guy at table thirteen. Eddie Munson. Rockstar. Your customer.
For the first time, you finally see his eyes. But instead of him taking his sunglasses off to reveal his brown hues, you see them straight on in the form of a camera flashing and printing onto the paper right in front of you. He looks borderline pissed as he’s gripping his guitar and shooing the paparazzi in the background away, the picture managing to catch the split-second that his eyes meet with the camera.
“He’s hot.”
You jump, clutching the newspaper to your chest as you turn to meet eyes with Judy casually leaning over your shoulder with a grin.
“Judy!” you hiss, sighing in relief.
“What?” she says plainly, “He is.”
“He is also currently Evan’s customer on table thirteen that I now have to serve.”
Judy’s pupil’s dilate. “Oh shit.”
You want to make a joking comment, calling Judy a cougar, but you’re interrupted by Carrie peeking her head in through the door. She looks down at the newspaper in your hands, and then back to your eyes. “Told you,” she says, her smirk from earlier still on her face.
Before you can respond annoyingly, Jim’s voice blares through the back. “Order up!” he shouts. “Waffles for thirteen!”
Your eyes nearly bulge out of its sockets.
“Jesus, do you ever slow down?” Carrie yells out the door.
They hear Jim’s “No!” and fan out back into the kitchen.
“Good luck, my love,” sings Judy.
“Can you ask for an autograph?” asks Carrie. She motions to her belly and gives it a soft pat. “She’ll think I’m real cool!”
“Ha, ha,” you roll your eyes, already holding the order as you kick the double doors open, passing back into the diner. You try your best to calm your heart as you pour coffee into the kettle, taking sugar from the side of the counter and putting two teaspoons into the mug. You feel eyes on you the entire time, and you don’t need to look up to know whose covered eyes they belong to.
It’s not every day that you get to serve a goddamn celebrity, so she thinks that everyone should give her a break (she’s specifically talking to her heart—it needs to stop beating so rapidly, making her brain think something is wrong).
You take a deep breath, steadying yourself as you hold the plate on one hand, and the mug on the other. “Just a customer,” you whisper under your breath, beginning to walk. “Just a ridiculously famous, incredibly good-looking customer who better leave a stunning tip.”
As you approach table thirteen, you notice that Eddie shifts slightly in his seat. One of his legs bounces under the table, and he drums his fingers lightly against the edge of the booth.
You \ set the plate and coffee down in front of him, you catch the faintest hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Waffles and coffee,” you announce, sliding the plate and mug onto the table with practiced ease. You’re proud that your voice doesn’t shake—too much, anyway.
Eddie leans back, grinning up at you. “Thanks, sweetheart.”
Your heart stops. You couldn’t help but think his eyes hold a knowing look, like he knew exactly what went down and now knows that you know exactly who he is.
“Enjoy,” you grin back.
Behind you, you hear him mutter something under his breath, followed by a quiet groan, and you can’t help but feel a small flutter in your chest that he enjoyed what you recommended to him.
The rest of the rockstar’s stay goes smoothly. You don’t intend on saying anything to give away what you know, despite it probably already being known, and you're grateful by this normalcy. You refill his coffee, make light conversation (the weather is particularly sunny and pretty today, shining through the windows and letting pretty glow spread through the diner), and take his plate when he’s wiped it clean.
You don’t even think much of his stay, mind already going back to it being a regular customer that deserves no more or less attention than anyone else is supposed to.
(Sure, his smile lingers in your mind a little longer than you’d like to admit—so what if his smile is better than any that you’ve seen, anyway?)
It isn’t until Eddie’s up and left and you trail back to the table to wipe it off, a damp rag in hand, do you notice the wad of cash left in his wake that is definitely worth more than his bill.
Your jaw drops down, staring at it and contemplating what to do with that much of an amount of money in front of you.
Next to it, a folded napkin sits.
Your mind immediately goes to an autograph; that he’s one of those celebrities, and he just couldn’t resist leaving a little something to prove of his appearance.
You’re taken back when you unfold it to see his number scribbled messily onto the fabric. Your fingers shake as you move your thumb to fully read the note that he added at the bottom,
Call me. Please. :)
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson x female reader#stranger things#rockstar!eddie munson
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hi um. i’d like to ask you for some advice, since it seems like a lot of people come to you when they need it. i’m a trans girl who’s been taking estrogen for 2.5 years but. i’m just so disappointed and unhappy with what hrt has done for me. i feel like i’ve been completely taken over by doomerism from me constantly comparing myself to other transfems both online and irl, and from spending too much time on trans reddit (i’m sending you this ask instead of writing another vent post on r/mtf). through this i’ve convinced myself that i will never be happy with my body, or that i’ll never have real boobs or a feminine body at all. i really really don’t want to give up hope, but it just seems so far out of reach, and i’m stuck down here in this inky abyss. what do you do in dark times when you need to regain hope, but you can’t do it yourself?
first of all, i wanted to say i'm sorry that you're feeling this way. medical transition is a very finicky thing. there is no way to predict what will happen and when, so it's okay to feel just. completely bummed the hell out when you're not seeing the changes you hoped for yet. i definitely see how it can be crushing, especially when you know your body needs to look a different way for you to be happy. it's important to consider people look a lot different irl than they do in photos and videos. camera lenses can only capture so much. pictures and videos can be edited. it's hard to compare yourself to something like that
& i did want to say that you're definitely not alone! there are a lot of girls in your exact situation. with everyone responding to HRT differently, you'll see girls who get changes right away, and girls where it takes a long time. changes with HRT generally happen very slowly, way slower than the eye can perceive, so it's okay if you feel like nothing is happening. your body just may need more time to adjust
have you ever increased your dose? if not, that is totally an option! you may also want to look into progesterone if you find that you're not happy with your breast growth after some time. it's best to look into progesterone first to make sure it's right for you, as it will affect more than just breast growth, but i wanted to throw it out there as an option! if you're not on an androgen blocker, this could also potentially help you
for both estrogen and testosterone HRT, it can take a minimum of 5 years for people to begin seeing the effects they were desiring. 5 years, minimum! that's a very long time, comparatively, you are very early on in your journey. the effects you want to see may just come along further on down the road. i know it's easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others. it's good to remind yourself that they are not you, they do not share your genetics. they look like them. you look like you. it's okay that you don't look like those people- they're not you.
it doesn't make you any less of a woman just because you haven't seen these changes yet. there are plenty of women who look just like you, cis, intersex, trans, genderqueer, and otherwise. there are many cis and intersex women who don't "pass", and it doesn't make them any less of a woman: the same applies to you, and every trans girl. dysphoria can be a real pain in the ass and make things harder than it needs to be. it's okay to not be content with where you're at now. it's okay to be frustrated that you're not seeing the changes you want to right now. many, many trans people feel just the same way you do.
you may feel awkward and uncomfortable right now because you're literally in a transitional phase. think about when teenagers go through puberty, about how awkward they look and feel. cracking voices, bodies that are "in the middle" and not fully developed. that's what you're going through at the moment, and its okay. it just takes time for things to fully settle in.
what i would suggest is trying to find ways to do some self care that affirm your gender that don't involve your appearance. validating yourself in other ways is extremely important. building yourself up takes time. if you feel insecure about how you look, it's okay. you can start building your confidence in your identity and gender in other areas of yourself, first, then move on to your appearance. try to spend time with people who respect you for who you are, no matter how you look. try to surround yourself with people and things that affirm you
i hope you start seeing those changes you want to see soon. if you need more advice, feel free to ask! if any other trans girls on E have any advice for the asker, or relate to the experience, please feel free to chip in with some feedback on this ask, or by sending an ask! due to being intersex, i was taking estrogen and progesterone despite not wanting to, so i was not cataloguing what was changing or anything like that, so i can't speak from personal experience there despite having been on E HRT in the past.
take care of yourself for now. try to go easy on yourself, you're still in your coocoon. the day where you emerge as a butterfly is on its way, it just takes a little time. please feel free to come back any time. i hope we can get some good insight for you
#asks#answers#transfem#transfeminine#transfemme#trans woman#trans women#trans girl#trans#transgender#trans community#estrogen#estrogen hrt#e hrt#hormones#hormone replacement therapy#medical transition
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A Night To Remember (part 2)
Synopsis: Viktor was dragged to one of the many events held in Piltover by Jayce, wanting to bring him out for "support." He agreed to know, sense it was Jayce that was asking him, but he generally began to feel bored and irritated (as presumed.) But then, Mel came to him, giving him advice he simply had to take.
Word count: 1.7k
Tags: No lube/protection, insertion, comfort
Authors note: I decided to take a more “seductive” approach with the second part sense I imagine that’s how it’d be portrayed in the show. I’m fairly happy with how it came out! Sorry if it’s a little rushed, I was busy with work related stuff. I may end up making future installments if I feel like it.. anyway, hope you enjoy!
[Previous Part]
—————————————————————————
“I’ll leave you to it,” Mel spoke in a lightened tone, gently patting Viktor’s back before walking off without another word.
Viktor opened his mouth to speak, but then promptly closed it, sighing as she walked away. How was he meant to bring something like this up? He can’t be blunt, that’d be awkward. He isn’t the best at being subtle… hm…
“Viktor!”
Jayce called out as he sped walked towards Viktor, letting out soft huffs through his partially opened mouth. There was a faint blush on his cheeks, Though, it was hard to tell if that was from going too fast or if it was from something else.
“Talis,” Viktor responded with a soft, partial smile on his face. “Having fun?
“Ah, you know how these parties are..”
Jayce laughed, gently scratching the back of his head. Viktor took notice of how the other seemed a lot more… fidgety, than usual. How weird. “They're more of a mandatory thing if anything. I have to show up, you know?” He then lightly nudged Viktor’s shoulder. “What, getting bored?”
“Ehh..” Viktor trailed off with a soft laugh, looking to the side. “I don’t think I’ll be answering that.”
Jayce smiled faintly at that before turning his head, looking towards the direction Mel walked in. “..Sooo..” He cleared his throat for a brief second, leaning towards VIktor’s ear. “Did Mel, uh.. Ask you, anything?”
Viktor lifted his head towards Jayce, arching an eyebrow. “What question would she have supposedly asked me?” He asked him, cocking his head to the side. Did this have to do with her advice, or something else completely?
“Oh, uh-” Jayce quickly turned his head away, his face blushing a deeper red. Well, that explained why his face was red earlier. “T-that’s, not important..” He spoke in a hushed tone as he scratched the back of his head, evading eye contact.
Viktor’s eyebrows knitted together for a moment. What were these two hiding from him… There had to be something deeper going on here, right? Maybe he was being taken off the research? No, he’s contributing too much for that… Perhaps it’s a more substantial project? Something to do with elevating Hextexh? But that didn’t explain the blush… maybe-
“Anyway!” Jayce clasped his hands together, breaking Viktor out of his rampant thoughts. The taller man reached out, lightly grabbing Viktor by his arm. “There's someone I’d like you to meet; He’s one of the councilmen! I think you two have a lot in common.”
Shit, Viktor was running out of time. He needed to get out of this before he was trapped in an endless loop of shallow banter.
Viktor took a sharp breath and grounded himself, keeping the two in a stagnant state. “Actually,” he breathed, pulling his arm away. “I would, uh… Like to suggest something else we could do.”
Jayce turned his head slightly, lifting an eyebrow. “Ah?” he then snorted, giving a faint laugh as he turned to face Viktor fully. “What, did you want to head back to the lab?” He asked half-jokingly, placing one hand on his hip while he pointed his other thumb towards the exit. He wouldn’t be surprised if that was the reason.
Viktor let out a stilted laugh in response, eyebrows furrowing for a brief moment. “Actually…” He lifted his hand, reaching out. He lightly placed his hand on his upper waist, slowly starting to dip his hand towards his lower back.
“I was thinking maybe we could get out of here, and, you know..”
As his hand trailed down, his fingers dipped down into the hem of his pants before rising back out.
“Have a little “event” of our own…?”
Jayce’s face quickly bloomed in color as his eyes went wide. His mouth opened in a faint “o’ shape before quickly shutting it, unable to say anything. He turned his head, looking around for a moment. “I…” He turned to look at Viktor, hushing his voice. “Give me five minutes.” He requested before turning away and quickly leaving to bid his farewells.
Viktor stood there for a moment, blinking a few times. Wow; that actually worked. He had to thank Mel when he saw her again for the tip…
The near second Jayce finished up, he dragged Viktor out of the party. Jayce didn’t waste any time by hosting small talk or taking a brief stroll. They were damn near running. Viktor was only able to get them to slow down by mentioning that he knew a place.
As they arrived at Mel’s home, Jayce stiffened for a moment, staring up at the large walls. His face faintly blushed a warm red color before shaking his head and clearing his throat. He seemed a lot more flustered rather than embarrassed by the location.
Viktor moved, soon pushing the doors open. He let out a stilted breath at the sleek, warm atmosphere of the interior, causing him to feel a little out of place due to his outward appearance. “Wow..” He murmured before clearing his throat.
He turned his head slightly to speak, parting his lips for a moment before Jayce quickly crowded against him, pulling him into a sharp kiss. This caused Viktor to nearly stumble back, but, he was able to use his cane to support the two of them as he pressed it firmly against the ground. Viktor lifted his freehand, placing it against the taller man’s side. Viktor leaned upwards in an attempt to kiss back, his eyes slowly beginning to shut.
Truth be told, he was a bit inexperienced when it came to affections such as this. But that wasn’t going to stop him in the slightest.
Viktor moved, feeling his way out towards the lounge room while attempting not to break the kiss. It was mostly him kicking his foot around with every step in hopes that he would hit the leg of the couch or anything. He then soon pressed his foot against the back of the sofa, letting out a huff through his nose.
Jayce pulled his lips away, the warm feeling fleeting away in seconds as he glanced toward the couch. He firmly grabbed hold of Viktor’s shoulders as he moved towards the seat of the couch, laying back against it as he pulled down Viktor with him.
Viktor stumbled a bit as he loomed over Jayce, fumbling with disrobing him. Though, the voice of Mel nagged at the back of his head. “Hold him off”... Should he be doing that now, or go further along? His grip tightened on Jayce’s tie for a moment, struggling to think about what his next move should be.
“Viktor-”
Jayce breathed.
“Viktor, now.” He demanded.
There goes all of Viktor’s previous inhibitions. He swiftly moves, pressing kisses against Jayce’s neck as he goes further along with stripping him Jayce’s stiff and heavy gasps fill the room. Music to Viktor’s ears, they were.
Viktor’s eyes shut firmly as he fully unbuttoned Jayce’s shirt, moving to lightly caress his waist for a moment as he moved to tug down his pants.
Then,
The sound of a door opening and promptly closing could be heard, followed by the melodious sound of heels clicking.
“I should have warned you about how demanding he could get… Apologies for that.” Mel’s voice echoed as she walked over, moving towards the arm of the couch.
Viktor visibly stiffened for a moment, unsure if he should keep going. But the feeling of Jayce writhing and whining beneath him was just too much for him to ignore. “You don’t need to apologize.” He promptly responded as he began to unbuckle Jayce’s pants, Eyes slightly narrowed as he began to work them down. “This is such a lucky sight..” He murmured.
Mel let out a soft laugh in response, looking down at Jayce for a quiet moment. He loved the way he looked, so desperate, on the verge of begging.
“If anything, Jayce should be the lucky one..” Mel commented, reaching out to lightly trace her fingers across Jayce’s jawline. He shuddered at the feeling, his hand reaching up to tightly grasp hers. She smiled at the sight. “He has been having thoughts for a night like this for a while..”
Viktor paused at her words, currently holding his belt. “...is that why he invited me.” He asked with a short, dry chuckle, working his pants off. “Clever move, Talis.”
Mel hummed in response to that, trailing her hand downwards towards Jayce’s chest. She rubbed slow, hypnotic circles against his chest, her eyes half-lidded.
“He has been talking about this for weeks, how he wanted both you and I. He thought he was being selfish.”
Viktor lifted Jayce’s legs, nearly immediately regretting that move due to their sheer weight of them. Before he could drop them, he lightly placed them over his shoulder, letting out a relieved sigh. “Selfish?” He repeated, gently rubbing his hands up and down his legs. “Now why would he think a thing like that..” He murmured. Viktor lightly grasped hold of his shaft after guiding it out of his underwear, pressing it against Jayce’s hole.
Jayce’s breath hitched as he stiffened, grip tightening on Mel’s arm. “No moisture?” Mel asked, lifting an eyebrow.
“Not needed,” Viktor responded. “He’s a big guy. He can take it.”
Jayce grumbled a bit as he turned his head away, his face blushing hotly in embarrassment. “God, V, don’t say it like that..” He murmured.
Viktor let out a faint laugh in response before bracing himself and pushing himself inside. He visibly shivered at the warm envelope, His eyes shutting for a moment as he braced himself. Jayce, on the other hand, tightly gripped Mel as he let out a shaky moan. His toes curled in an attempt to get comfortable, shallowly letting out a heavy breath.
Mel smiled briefly at the sight, moving to rest her hands on Jayce’s cheeks to help soothe him.
“Tight, isn’t he,” Mel commented.
“You sound like you’re speaking from experience..” Viktor laughed dryly, waiting for Jayce to adjust.
Mel smirked a bit as she looked to the side, simply swaying back and forth rather than giving him a straight answer. “...you’ll get used to it.” She assured.
Viktor quirked his eyebrow upwards, gazing at the collected woman in front of him. “Is that to imply this will be a regular thing?”
“As long as you’re willing to be with us, Vikto,” Mel responded in a bit of a warmer tone, tilting her head to the side slightly.
..So this was their plan, to pull him into the relationship. He had to admit, they planned this out very well.
“Viktor..” Jayce murmured, gently pressing his free hand against his lower stomach area. “I-I’m ready, you can move.” He assured.
Now, Who was Viktor to deny such a pleasant offer from these two?
#fanfic#arcane fanfic#arcane smut#arcane#smut fic#suggestive#lemon#arcane jayce#jayce talis#arcane viktor#viktor talis#Viktor#arcane mel#mel medarda#arcane jayvik#arcane melvik#arcane meljay#arcane meljayvik#jayvik#meljay#melvik#meljayvik#polycule#mel x viktor#mel x jayce#jayce x viktor#mel x jayce x viktor
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Howdy T'Witch! It makes me so happy that you got your blog all up and designed! Those are big days and I’m happy that it looks so good! Hopefully you think so too!
I say that your writing requests were open and I’d love to pick your brain on some light angst if you’re up for it! No worries if you ain’t because hey understandable. The holidays be crazyyyyyy 🤪
But maybe to something to think about if you’re bored and whatever. But I wanted to ask on how do you think the Bayverse Boys would respond to you (y/n) getting amnesia and forgetting about them completely for whatever reason for how ever long? Do you think they’d try to rejog their memory or try to love them better with the chance of a fresh start? Or something else entirely. I am curious and I’d love to hear your thoughts if you’ve got the time and energy. Thanks for existing!
Hey Anon! (It’s weird to type this and have you not actually be an anon lmao)
I am very happy I finally have my blog up and running how I like, it finally feels like a little home to me. Thank you for noticing! 🫂🫂🫂
Thank you so much for sending an ask, I’m going to have fun with this one! I’m giving them a happy ending though, cause I can’t write angst and not give my boys a good ending. (Also completely unedited and not proof read lol)
Leonardo
The worry and anxiety he feels in the pit of his stomach like he swallowed a lead weight is one thing, but the chest-clenching heartbreak when you shriek at the sight of him and had no recollection of his existence is another.
He keeps a stoic face once you’ve calmed down and while explaining who he is to you, but really this poor guy is absolutely gutted. It takes so much of him to keep a straight face.
Still a bit of a helicopter, using any subtle opportunity to jog your memory of himself. He’ll make a cup of tea for you in the exact way he did on your first date, subtly comment on your outfit when he recognizes it’s something he bought you, anything he could think of to hopefully remind you.
This man does not sleep the entire time. You aren’t sleeping in his bed, how could he anyway? Once he is sure you are fully asleep, he comes to check on you. Listen to see if you talk in your sleep, mumbling about memories or just in case a nightmare decides to haunt you.
When he can’t check on you or do really anything else, he’s meditating in order to keep his emotions in line. He’s completely destroyed, so meditating for hours on end is the only way he can keep himself in check.
Although he’s snappy, irritable, and driving everyone but you away, what Leo really needs is one of his brothers to ignore the attitude and just stand there and let him get it out. By the time he’s done he’s already apologized a hundred times, he’s just lost and broken hearted.
Out of all his brothers, Raph is probably the one that cracks him and gets him to just spit it out. They all know what’s going on and how much Leo’s hurting from it all, but he still needs to let it out. Raph can handle the attitude with ease, brushing it aside and letting Leo get himself together
After what feels like an eternity, you gain your memory back at the most random of times while you happened to be watching him practice his kata. When you start babbling memories excitedly, he picks you up in a hug and cries into you.
It doesn’t matter if anyone’s watching, he’s crying and just so grateful that you remember who he is. Weeping tears of joy and the bottled anxiety finally burst as he holds you. Bear with this poor guy, it’s been a ride for both of you really.
Raphael
This poor guy is so surprised and in shock when you don’t remember him, he thinks you’re playing some sort of prank on him at first.
“Heh- babe, c’mon…don’t joke around like dat”
Once it hits him that this isn’t a prank or joke, you genuinely do not know who he is, Raph practically shuts down.
The love of his life doesn’t remember who he is, even looks at him like he’s the monster he felt he was before meeting you. It breaks his heart so much he locks himself away for a day or two, unfortunately leaving you more confused.
When you start wanting to be near him- no, needing to be near him, is when he starts coming around. He found you pacing back and forth in front of his bedroom door like a cat waiting to enter a closed off room one night.
You couldn’t explain it, but you have this invisible pull and primal need to be near him somehow. To be close, even touching him. Although you don’t remember why, you just know you need to,
Raph starts coming out of his room and trying to act normal, but when his brothers look him in the face an see how red and raw his eyes are, the dark circles, and the heartbreak in his eyes, they know it’s just an act but wisely choose not to comment.
He catches you staring at him while he’s working out, chuckling as you bashfully try to shy away. He doesn’t tease or joke though, instead encourages you to come watch
“I miss my favorite spotting partner,” Raph admits, hoping that will help jog your memory a little. It doesn’t outright, but you do find yourself already knowing how to spot him.
After a few days of you following Raph around like a lost puppy, your memory finally comes crashing back to you when Raph slipped the boxing gloves on you for practice.
Relief. So much relief it washes over Raph like a tidal wave that nearly knocks him off his feet. He holds you and kisses you, telling you repeatedly how grateful and happy he is you have your memory and you’re here. The tears will come at night while the two of you are in bed for the night, but he holds you and everything is okay.
Donatello
Initiate full on analytical mode. He is immediately going through a thousand different scenarios and cures in his head, he almost forgets that *you forgot* who he was all together, so his babbling did nothing to calm you down.
Even with all his knowledge and abilities, it still doesn’t negate the overwhelming emotions he feels when you don’t recognize him. It hurts, makes it hard for Donnie to even breathe, but he hides it behind his science and research.
Sitting in front of his computer for days on end in between checking up on your, it becomes almost like an obsession for Donnie to get your memory back. At the risk of his own health and wellbeing, he does not stop.
From using scents he knows you enjoy, like that cologne you bought for him as a gift or your favorite body wash, tasting your favorite coffee or the tiramisu Donnie bought for the two of you on a date once.
Let’s put on that movie we watched on that one Valentine’s weekend; you were obsessed with it for weeks!
Oh, what if Donnie took you to that rooftop the two of you saw a comet in the night sky once? It was absolutely beautiful, but wasn’t nearly as beautiful as you, he confided.
Countless hours of research keep Donnie from sleeping, honestly at one point contemplating how he could just straight main-line caffeine into his blood stream to stay awake.
Without warning one night, you come into his lab and demand he sleep. Not ask, not coax, you demand Donnie to get in bad with you and get some sleep. He questions if you’ve finally gotten your memory back, but sadly no. And he’s crushed. But you still demand he lay down in bed with you.
Crawling into bed with you with awkward limbs, Donnie is surprised that you lay down exactly as you always do with him. Even without memory, it was like your body still remembered how you fit together.
Quiet tears fall as Donnie holds onto you, sleep mercifully taking him into a deep slumber. Guilt crawled its way into your stomach while trying to sleep, wishing that your memory would just return so you could stop all of this.
Waking up in the morning, you blinked with shock as you look at Donnie- looked at him like you knew him again. And you did. You had woken up with your memory by some miracle.
Kissing and hugging you with love and relief, Donnie can’t keep his hands off of you or keep the tears from smudging his glasses. It was all so hard to believe while it was happening that now it was over, it felt like the end of a tornado.
The two of you decide to sleep in a little longer, only because Donnie could barely hold his eyes open. Frankly, sleep was probably what you needed too after all this.
Michelangelo
Confused. Downright, no jokes confused. How could you not remember him so suddenly? Time just doesn’t erase like that right?
Mikey asks Donnie a million and one questions, repeating or re-wording them or giving scenarios. It drives his brother mad, but he tries to be lenient because Donnie knows how terrified his younger brother is.
He caters to you in every way; offers to get you a drink, make you something to eat, get you a pillow, it becomes a little overwhelming, but you don’t know how to tell him to stop.
When Mikey tries to kiss you and pull away, it was like you could practically hear the way his heart shatters like glass. But he hides it with a smile and flirts, telling you he won you over once, he could do it again.
This is when he starts to flirt with you like he did before the two of you started dating, but with far more strategy and knowledge. Comments about how sweet you are while making your favorite chocolate pancakes with strawberries and whipped cream
Tells you how amazing you look in that shirt or those pants, mostly because he was the one to buy them.
He’ll give you your favorite kind of gifts; favorite flowers, candy, stuffed animals, anything he can think of giving you and jog your memory. Each time it doesn’t work, he’s crushed a little bit more, but he keeps trying.
Plays movies that you and Mikey watched together, shared music playlists the two of you built together over the period of your relationship, and whatever else he could possibly think of. But it still didn’t work.
When you aren’t anywhere near to see, Mikey with let himself cry for a moment out of frustration and sadness that you don’t remember him. It hurts, but by the time you are near he has a smile back on his face.
He thought you were sleeping one night when you found him crying down one of the sewer tunnels away from the lair. The sight broke your heart, which for some reason jogged your memory. Rushing to hug and kiss him, you damn near scared Mikey out of his shell.
“Angelcakes, you remember!?” Mikey shouts, picking you up and spinning you in a massive hug. Thank the pizza Gods, he had you back!
Taglist
@silverwatergalaxy @thelaundrybitch @sophiacloud28 @iridescentflamingo @thegirlwiththeninjaturtletattoos
@yorshie @truffle-reblogs @redsrooftopprincess @ninnosaurus @thepinkpanther83
@avery73 @luckycharms1701 @tmnt-tychou @suksiskovaikkakuuseen @milykins @justalotoffanfiction
#Wee!!#Bayverse TMNT#Bayverse TMNT Headcanons#tw amnesia#cw amnesia#Bayverse TMNT x reader#Leonardo#Leo#Raphael#Raph#Donatello#Donnie#Michelangelo#Mikey
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𝗕𝗶𝗿𝘁𝗵𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝗗𝗲𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻
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I drew this to cope with my birthday depression.
Took 5 months. I also wanted to beat my old manhwa from 5 years ago.
-- Long post ahead! It's my WIPS and thought process. --
Junko is my comfort character as she's the only character I know who hates her birthday.
(Screenshot from Ultimate Talent Development Plan)
I know she’s a villain who has done a lot of bad things, but finding comfort and liking her doesn’t mean I excuse her actions.
A lot of painful feelings went into this, even in Mukuro's perspective so please respect it 🙏🏻
—
- WIPS & Thought Process -
—
Story Script Writing:
A lot of thoughts and feelings went into my script.
-I removed sentences like “For giving me cake!” as I wanted to do more showing than telling.
-“Why do you seem so happy Mukuro?” is changed to “Why are you smiling like that, Mukuro?” as I wanted the sentence to focus more on the thing Ryoko noticed. Mukuro would definitely be happy celebrating Ryoko’s birthday, and the new sentence would help to understand how Ryoko interpreted that Mukuro was more happy than usual.
-“good day” is changed to “great day” for greater emphasis of Ryoko’s happiness.
-A pun is done on “live”, I wanted this sentence to convey the complicated feelings of Junko. She doesn’t want to “live” a “fabricated happy lie” as it goes against her honesty moral. But there’s also a part of her that doesn’t want to kill Ryoko, as she doesn’t want to “leave” this “fabricated happy lie”. She wants to be happy as Ryoko, even if it’s a lie.
This part is a big reference and a reply to Danganronpa Zero.
The background texts are quotes from Danganronpa Zero.
Junko saying “What the hell? Hope?” is a reference to Danganronpa Zero’s ending:
Reading Danganronpa Zero feels like it’s saying something to me: “We are trapped in a loop of despair and hope.” and I’m replying with this part as a “Yes, I agree.”
Junko being confined in her mind is another thing I like about her too.
I feel the moment we are born, we are trapped, that’s why I ended this comic with “I wish I wasn’t born.”
The moment I’m born, I’m unwanted and worthless, a monster.
I’m trapped in my mind, in other people’s judgements and expectations, and there’s no way out.
I can’t just turn invisible and there’s always something for people to judge and hate. And that hurts when it’s something important to you or you can’t change about yourself.
But even with all the pain, I think of hope to carry on and it’s a loop to fight to live.
I think I make progress with healing but then I’d think wth I’m made to work on this. Cause my life is already scripted from the moment I was born— I’m scripted to have this trauma, this story made my personality and character so in the end I’m still trapped.
So that’s another reason why I find Junko a comforting character and why I feel birthday depression.
I thought of the story first before I thought of the characters who would play it, so I had to make sure it’s in character.
Things like if Mukuro would say “AU” or “Alternate Universe”. I felt since she spent a lot of time with Junko who knows a lot about these things, she would have heard of this and know the short form term for it. Especially since she had to be Junko at some point.
Since it’s a story about Birthday Depression, my thoughts instantly went to Junko then to Mukuro. It was the perfect story theme to write for them especially cause they are the despair sisters.
Plus, they are two characters I can feel their struggles and feelings deeply for, so I can write and draw deeply for this story.
Birthdays tend to be happy, and I felt the only kinda right time I can talk about my birthday depression would be on their day.
I felt suffocated and lost myself over the past few years, as I felt I needed to be happy no matter what. When I opened up about sadness and my struggles, people would hate and invalidate me for it. I feel my art reflects that, I don’t like looking back at my old art. It lacked my true feelings, but I feel I’m finding myself again in my Mirai Nikki and Danganronpa art.
For the past few years I tried to celebrate my birthday to try to make myself happy about it but in the long run it didn’t work. I appreciate everyone who celebrated with me all these years still, but now I’m trying to overcome it in another way— facing despair instead of trying to cover it with hope.
I think I’ve learnt a lot about myself and understood myself better through this comic’s process.
Layout Plan:
You can see that things were changed in the final from my layout plan X’D haha
In page 2, Mukuro’s 1st panel is changed so composition is better.
In page 3, after seeing Ryoko as Junko, Mukuro is reaching out her hand instead of placing it on her chest. I wanted it to feel like Mukuro wants to reach out to Ryoko at that moment, like trying to get a wish she knows isn’t real.
In page 5, binary code is replaced with texts from Danganronpa Zero’s story so it reinforces the idea of “a life already fully planned out”.
Lining Process:
I struggled with this part the most as anatomy and poses is not my strong point.
I asked my friend, Setsuya, for help with my poses and redrew the same pose many times for this comic. I really wanted to convey the feelings for this comic right especially since it’s very personal to me. Big thanks to her for helping me so much, I feel I improved a lot from this! 🥺 <3
1st panel of 1st page is the hardest to draw, I’m laughing at my first try of Mukuro who looks like she’s forced to be there 😂:
With suggestions from my friend of how to improve, I tried to improve everyone’s poses:
^
Mukuro’s pose was changed to look more fondly at Ryoko, happy to be there and relaxed haha.
Ryoko’s pose was changed to look more delighted and happy about the cake (Which helps to convey the line I removed from my script, “For giving me cake!”)
Matsuda’s pose was changed to look a bit more annoyed about still cares for Ryoko (shown by him still looking at her from the corner of his eyes even though his head is turned away)
And haha I forgot Ryoko’s legs can be seen due to the table frills being transparent, so I had to go back and draw her legs X’D
For this panel, a lot of thoughts went into what things I should place, how they are placed, and what kind of items it should be e.g.
I wanted it to tell the story of what happened before all the characters gathered here, what their feelings are towards each other, and how they are like as individual characters :3
I was thinking Mukuro and Matsuda love Ryoko so much they spoil her by buying a giant cake haha X’D So that’s why there’s a plastic knife instead of a real knife— to show that the cake was bought.
I think they decided not to cook as they would fight about it… (idk if they know how to cook tbh)
I chose strawberry shortcake cause white = purity and red strawberries = blood X’D Kinda like Ryoko-
I was about to draw neatly cut and placed cakes but I think... Ryoko is bad at cutting… X’D so the cakes are lying flat with the cream a bit splattered on their plates.
The table cloth, spoons and plates are all elegant and neat cause Mukuro prepared it for Ryoko :3 I don’t think Matsuda would be able to do that since he seems to not be a tidy person X’D but I do think he probably decided these items and arrangement with Mukuro :3
Here’s a random joke Matsuda + My roughly drawn Promised Neverland manga cover before I squeezed it on to his book haha:
I was going to make Matsuda read Megaman at first like in canon, but I felt making him read “Promised Neverland” was fitting as it helped me bring some foreboding to my happy setting. Like the promise never landed cause I’m going to break my happy promise/premise X’D
I felt it was fitting too as Matsuda wasn’t met with a good fate like the Promised Neverland children.
Plus I feel Matsuda would like a genre like that, or perhaps he wouldn’t mind anything as he is a laid back character.
This pose was changed so Ryoko would look more reserved and have less of a romantic vibe? Cause the intertwined fingers felt a bit more romantic and off to me, as it wasn’t the vibe I was going for.
Feat. The paper sketch is my friend helping me with anatomy X’)
While writing sentences and drawing for Mukuro’s scenes, I was thinking of experiences I’ve gone through before and the feelings I felt then.
The way I wished things could be different. I kept having dreams of happy endings I wanted to happen but then I would wake up to the tragic reality and cry.
The way I was suffering on the inside but still held on to this thing I perceived as “Hope” even though it was killing me and could be seen as “Despair” in another POV/or I already knew it was bad for me but it was also my only hope.
Symbolisms for this panel:
Carrying a candle-> holding on to hope/a wish.
Candle not blown out -> Mukuro's wish didn't come true (blowing out a candle means bringing your wish on smoke to the good spirits above to grant your wish) , her hoping leading to despair.
My pose was changed here as it is more natural for the hands to be like that, plus the other hand holding on to the arm greater empathise how Mukuro is holding on strongly to this candle.
The candle is melting and the wax is getting on her hand, burning her. Still, she refuses to let go which empathises how much she needs to hold on to this. Even as she grabs her own hand causing more pain from bleeding, she still needs this “hope.”
Some colour tests for this panel:
I was considering blue fire because blue fire is stronger than red.... but then if it is a wish of hope, I was considering yellow too... but maybe it would be too happy?
Mukuro is feeling sad and wishful in this panel.
I ended up going for blue fire which gives off yellow light for a purposeful contradictory colouring— to show that what is perceived as despair can also be perceived as hope.
^ Some exploration for the poses here so I can figure out which conveys what I wanted to convey the best. I like the poses where Mukuro is reserved happy, Ryoko is more playful(?), Matsuda is more relaxed.
^ Exploration for the Junko slash pose. Ended up just going back to the original pose I had planned for the layout.
I found this super hard to draw as I’m not good at anatomy, drew it quite a few times and deleted as I couldn’t draw it right. In the end, my friend drew that pose reference which helped me get it right in final!
Reasons why I chose the original layout pose in the end:
Strangle pose-> I don't want to strangle Ryoko, not because it’s too violent or graphic or that she's 🥺uwu and I can’t kill her-
I just feel Junko doesn’t completely hate Ryoko... a part of her wants to live a happy life after all
But she can’t, that's why the words "A fabricated happy lie, I don’t want to live this!"
It's a lie and it's against her value (honesty).
Sword slashing pose-> Junko is directly jumping towards and has no hesitation slashing Ryoko. This feels off cause it’s too violent which doesn’t convey the message I want.
Sword is also stronger than knife, which would hurt more.
When I see the knife and how the body is twisted a bit away in the original layout pose, it works better as I can see some control to the slash so it's not full on hatred and anger towards Ryoko.
Random full drawing of this Junko before I cut it off for composition.
I find it easier to get the anatomy right if I draw the full thing and draw through everything.
^ I’m super sad at my failure for this :,) I didn’t intend it to be like that 😭
It’s too hard for me to draw, so my friend helped me again and I chose a pose and studied her pose and drew the whole pose again:
I chose the 1st pose because the angle of the faces there best shows both character’s facial expressions and the emotions are the most important for this scene.
Plus 3/4 angle is better than the flat side view one as it helps make this scene more dramatic!
My friend helped me with the position of Junko’s tie:
reached max images for this post so,
WIPS continued in another post
#ryoko otonashi#junko enoshima#mukuro ikusaba#danganronpa zero#dr0#yasuke matsuda#danganronpa fanart#my content
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Heyyy
The part 2 to Why couldn't it be me was really good , do you think you'll make a part 3 , you just for the happy ending ? Pleaseee pretty please w a cherry on top?
Of course here it is!
Why couldn't it be me? Part 3.
Wally west x reader
The weeks following your conversation with Wally were both a relief and a burden. You finally had the space you’d been yearning for, but it left you with too much time to think.
You replayed Wally’s words over and over in your head.
He had admitted he loved you after all this time..
They sounded like a dream, yet they carried the weight of your heartbreak. Could you trust him? Or was it just another one of Wally’s impulsive decisions, the kind he often made without thinking about the consequences?
You spent your days reflecting, journaling, and throwing yourself into training with the team. Anything to keep your mind from spiraling. But no matter what you did, thoughts of Wally always lingered.
---
Wally, meanwhile, was doing everything he could to prove he meant what he’d said.
He had ended things with Artemis shortly after your conversation. It hadn’t been easy—she deserved honesty, and he gave her that.
“I care about you, Artemis,” he had said, his voice steady but full of regret. “But I don’t love you the way I should.”
Artemis had taken it better than he expected. She’d been hurt, of course, but she wasn’t blind.
“I had a feeling,” she’d admitted. “It’s always been (Y/N), hasn’t it?”
Wally hadn’t known what to say to that.
“Just don’t mess this up,” Artemis had said with a small, sad smile. “They’re worth it.”
--
A few weeks later, you found yourself wandering the beach near Mount Justice. It was one of your favorite places to think—a quiet spot where the sound of the waves drowned out the noise in your head.
You’d been coming here a lot lately, trying to sort through your feelings.
You cared about Wally. That much was undeniable. But could you trust him not to hurt you again?
As you stared out at the ocean, you heard footsteps approaching. You didn’t need to turn around to know who it was.
“Hey,” Wally said softly, stopping a few feet away.
“Hey,” you replied, your voice calm but guarded.
For a moment, neither of you spoke. The sound of the waves filled the silence.
“I didn’t mean to intrude,” Wally said finally. “I just... I’ve been thinking about you.”
You turned to face him, crossing your arms. “What do you want, Wally?”
He looked down at the sand, then back up at you. “I wanted to see you. To talk. If you’ll let me.”
You hesitated, then nodded. “Go ahead.”
Wally took a deep breath, gathering his thoughts. “I know I said a lot the last time we talked, and I’ve been thinking about it ever since. About us. About how I’ve hurt you.”
His voice wavered, but he pushed on. “I was selfish. I didn’t see what was right in front of me because I was too focused on chasing something I thought I wanted. And when you pulled away, it made me realize how much I’d taken you for granted."
You watched him carefully, your heart aching at the vulnerability in his eyes.
“I ended things with Artemis,” he said, his voice steady. “Not because of you, but because it wasn’t fair to her. I couldn’t keep pretending to be in love with her when my heart was somewhere else.”
Your breath hitched at his words, but you didn’t interrupt.
“I’m not asking you to forgive me right away,” he continued. “I know I’ve screwed up, and I don’t deserve an easy fix. But I meant what I said, (Y/N). I love you. And I’ll spend the rest of my life proving that to you if I have to.”
You felt tears prickling at the corners of your eyes, but you held them back. “Wally... I’ve spent so long loving you from a distance. Watching you fall for someone else. It hurt more than I can put into words.”
“I know,” he said softly. “And I hate myself for putting you through that.”
“But...” You hesitated, your voice trembling. “These past few weeks, I’ve realized something. No matter how much I tried to let go, I couldn’t. Because I love you too.”
Wally’s eyes widened, hope flickering across his face.
“That doesn’t mean everything’s okay,” you added quickly. “Trust takes time, and I need to know that you’re serious about this. About us.”
“I am,” he said, stepping closer. “I swear, (Y/N). I’ll do whatever it takes to make this work.”
You searched his eyes, looking for any sign of doubt, but all you saw was sincerity.
“Okay,” you said finally, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Okay?” Wally repeated, a cautious smile spreading across his face.
You nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips. “We’ll take it slow. But I’m willing to try.”
Wally let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, his smile widening. “You have no idea how much that means to me.”
For the first time in weeks, you felt a sense of peace wash over you. It wouldn’t be easy, but maybe—just maybe—this was your start.
---
The next few weeks were a mix of tentative steps and quiet moments. Wally was true to his word, taking things slow and giving you the space you needed. He made an effort to show you how much he cared, from small gestures like bringing you your favorite snacks to simply listening when you needed to talk.
It wasn’t perfect—there were moments of doubt and lingering hurt—but you were both committed to making it work.
One evening, as the team gathered at Mount Justice for a rare night off, Wally found you sitting on the couch, a book in your hands.
“Hey,” he said, plopping down beside you.
“Hey,” you replied, setting the book aside.
“Can I ask you something?” he said, his tone unusually serious.
“Sure.”
He hesitated, then said, “Do you think we’ll ever get back to the way things used to be?”
You thought about it for a moment, then shook your head. “No. But maybe that’s a good thing.”
Wally frowned. “How do you mean?”
“Well we're together now as a couple,” you said, smiling softly. “We’re not the same friends we were before. And I think that’s okay. Maybe we can build something even better.”
Wally’s expression softened, and he reached out to take your hand. “I like the sound of that.”
As you sat there together, hand in hand, you felt a sense of hope you hadn’t felt in a long time.
#imagine#x reader#dc#dc comics#fluff#young justice#x you fluff#wally west#wally west x reader#kid flash x reader#KF
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The late December sun is already up when Wille wakes to the most beautiful sight: Simon’s face inches from his, soft and relaxed in his sleep. His heart swells with happiness and love, but then clenches when he remembers that today is his last day in Bjärstad and he’ll never have another morning like this again. He pushes the thought away and just tries to focus on the quiet joy of the moment. He watches Simon sleep until his bladder forces him out of bed and then he starts rummaging around Simon’s kitchen. The least he can do is make him breakfast.
Simon emerges from the bedroom just as the coffee is ready, looking adorably sleep-rumpled. He attaches himself to Wille from behind, wrapping his arms around his waist.
“Are you making breakfast?” he murmurs, nuzzling the back of Wille’s neck.
“I am. Is that okay?”
“Mm-hmm. I like a man who knows his way around a kitchen.”
“Then I’m sorry to disappoint. Coffee and sandwiches is pretty much the extent of my abilities.”
“You could learn.”
And Wille would, happily, for Simon. He imagines cooking meals for him. Providing for him. It would make him so happy. But no amount of cooking skills could ever make up for the way being associated with Wille would destroy Simon’s life. Wille’s entire romantic history could be divided into two categories: people who were only with him for the glamour, and people who couldn’t live with the weight of becoming public property. He knows Simon is firmly in the latter category. Wille can’t do that to him. He couldn’t bear to see Simon’s light dimmed and being the cause of it.
But at least he gets to have breakfast with him. It’s cosy and domestic with plenty of stolen kisses. They’re both excited about the play tonight.
Then Simon mentions that he’s going to his mum’s house the next day to decorate the tree and bake some cookies. Wille could come too, if he wanted.
“I’d love to,” Wille says, meaning it, “but I can’t. I have to get back to Stockholm. The gala is tomorrow.”
Simon is disappointed, but he knows that Wille dreads the gala, so he tries to give him something nice to look forward to. “Then we could see each other after Christmas. Whenever you’re free.”
Wille’s expression changes at that and he doesn’t reply immediately. An ice block lodges itself in Simon’s stomach.
“You don’t want to,” he says, not a question. He feels like an idiot. Yes, they’ve only known each other for a couple of days, but Wille looked at him with such adoration, Simon really thought they were on the same page. But apparently not. Simon was the only one foolish enough to lose his heart.
“No, I want to, I do,” Wille pleads. “There’s nothing I want more than to be with you. I like you so much, Simon, but I – It can’t work. You’d regret it. My life is… you don’t want to be part of it.”
“Oh, I don’t, don’t I? Funny, I don’t remember being asked.” In all honesty, the little things Wille has shared made Simon dislike the monarchy even more and he doesn’t love the prospect of having anything to do with it, but he’s sure they could have worked something out. Except apparently Wille has already made the decision for the both of them.
“Trust me, you don’t. You’d hate it and you’d hate me and it would ruin your life. I’ve seen it happen before. I can’t do that to you.”
“But you can do it to yourself?”
“... What do you mean?”
“If you hate it so much, why do you stay?”
🎄 Hallmark Christmas Movie AU Part 3 🎄
(part 1) ❄️(part 2)
At this point in the script, we need Simon/his family/the town to face some kind of problem that Wille can help solve in a way that doesn’t rely on his royal status, lets him spend more time with Simon and helps him understand what he’s really passionate about. So what I’m thinking is that Simon’s school or maybe the town community centre is putting on a Christmas play. Actually it’s probably a musical so Simon is very involved. It’s an annual thing that the town is completely obsessed with. It’s not Christmas without it, basically. But now there’s a problem: the beautiful hand-painted scenery flats they always use got damaged somehow (Hallmark Force Majeure) and they’re unusable. Everyone is devastated; the flats are a classic and everybody loves them. They can do the play without them but it just won’t be the same. Nobody is available to paint new ones at such short notice. Except a certain prince who is there on holiday so he has nothing to do besides make eyes at his crush and who took up painting some years ago as a way to calm his anxiety.
So Wille offers to repaint the flats. Mostly he wants to impress Simon and spend more time with him, but he also really likes the thought of being actually useful. I don’t know how long it would take in real life but in fantasy world it takes exactly the amount of time they have. Simon keeps him company whenever he can and enjoys watching him paint and the cute little frown he has on his face when he’s concentrating. They talk and joke and flirt and get to know each other better. Wille thinks that he should probably be trying to protect his heart because he knows that this can never be anything more than a little holiday romance – someone as wonderful as Simon doesn’t belong in his dreary life. But he knows that it’s a lost cause. He’s falling hard and fast and there’s no stopping it, so he decides to just enjoy it while he can.
As Wille paints, at first he’s trying to copy the old flats based on photos, but then he gets ideas for changes and improvements. He doesn’t think he should do that, though; it’s a tradition and he shouldn’t break it. But Simon encourages him to be creative and just do what he feels is right, and Wille finds that he’s really enjoying the process. (See, it’s a metaphor! We are not in a subtle genre.)
And you can guess what happens. At some point Wille gets some paint on his face and Simon tries to wipe it off. They were laughing about something just a second ago but suddenly they’re not. Simon’s thumb brushes over Wille’s cheekbone, smearing the paint. Wille’s nose nudges Simon’s, and their lips finally meet in a kiss that’s been days in the making. It’s soft and brief. They break apart to check in with each other, grin, and the next thing Wille knows is he’s dropping the paint brush and pulling Simon closer, closer, closer.
Simon ends up with paint on the back of his shirt and in his hair, but he doesn’t mind.
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If I may, how do you typically approach choosing colors in your art? It always has just a lovely feel to it, so I was a bit curious; don't feel pressured to answer ofc :]
I’ve been using a lot of gradient maps lately, they work by switching the greys in your piece with a corresponding colour according to its value. Basically, I colour in black and white, grab a gradient map, and then I adjust the colours by hand until I’m happy with it. This isn’t the only kind of colouring I do, but it works great if you’re in a rush or you’re struggling to find a good starting point for your colours. I’ve been operating under a time crunch for these Sketchbook Week drawings and the Plenism promo stuff I made, so for all except one I used gradient maps. I’m actually in a bit of a funk with my colours right now soooo I’ll come back and do a proper colouring tutorial for my style once I’m happier with how my non gradient mapped colours are looking !
#after sketchbook weeks over I wanna sit and do some colour studies to find palettes I’m more happy with#even these gradient map ones I’m not thrilled with#they’re fine! but I could do better#in terms of other tricks I use I’ll often adjust the hues and saturations if the whole piece to give things more unity if I’m struggling#and/or add a new layer on top of everything and fill it with one base colour#and play around with different layer settings and opacities on top#I’ve found a luminosity layer on a low 5-10% setting is quite nice#basicslly I fuck around and find out#and if I’m in a rush I use a gradient map#they’re not neccesarily a quick fix! if you’re like me you’ll still want to do some tweaking after it’s been applied#and you need to pay attention to your values when you’re colouring in black and white#but that’s another good thing about gradient maps - they force you to focus on value over hue which is an important skill to build#so yeah I’ll come back to this and make an actual colouring tutorial once I feel like I have actual good advice to give#cause rn I’m just very meh in my colouring and I don’t think I have anything very helpful to add#need to find some tutorials myself first !#ty for the ask!#ask#art#my art#bpcol-reblogs#textpost#blethering#for this piece the adjustments were minimal in comparison to what I usually do btw#because I was rushinggggg lol#I did more for my Plenism posters n such#but I can’t really show good comparisons because I. didn’t save them like that#I usually smush all my layers together when I’m drawing sooo yeah makes it hard to go back my bad whoops#but I saved as I was going whilst drawing this so I could provide examples yipee!#if I’d been smarter and remembered more I could’ve had more process screenshots butttt oh well lmao
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ughhh I need to stop having mental breakdowns over little things.
#vent in tags#chat sesh with iris#vent#tw vent#I feel like everyone hates me and even you all hope I die and nobody likes my ships bc everyone thinks I’m not good enough for my f/os#and the worst part is that none of it is unfounded!!!#none of my friends are talking to me AT ALL anymore even when I start conversations#(including in text)#while they actively talk to other people WHERE I CAN SEE IT!!!#only one of my friends is and all they do is send me anti bs and go ‘omggg these people are so weird!!!’ about like anyone who ships with-#certain characters (including ones that I SHIP WITH!!! which is why I don’t talk about it other than here)#people are like ‘omggg… I hate it when men like these characters. you don���t get them and they’d never love you.’ about my f/os#which triggers dysphoria and self loathing and fear about my ships#tw suicidal ideation#<- somewhat#I don’t like anything about myself and I don’t deserve anything that I have#man. I don’t even want to be here anymore#also I have severe mental illness that has caused a lack of possibility for happiness that lasts longer than fleeting moments#I have not spoken (like aloud) to anyone other than my parents since THE THIRD!!!#I’m going to ask my psychiatrist for testosterone on Wednesday but idek if I’m gonna make it until then#probably I will because I’m too depressed to gather the energy to do it#also she might even say no or not be able to prescribe it#and this isn’t even why I’m the most upset rn but I REALLY need a win#also my mom was like ‘you haven’t given me another name so I’ll just keep calling you the name I gave you 😊😊😊.’ instead of. idk. asking me?#tw suicide#okay yeah the tag is fully warranted now#I like know how I’d do it and everything#I also had a panic attack because I couldn’t find my quilt hashtag just autism things!!!#not takeover#obviously
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obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog
Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️
Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D
#guys help is it time for a rebranding?? am I just gonna post about f1 now??#I still can’t believe this has all started because bestie and I were watching Ted Lasso (because I’ve been obsessed with that show for a#while now too) and I paused the episode to talk about how I really like the way Jamie interacts with kids (I’m sorry people being good with#and nice to kids is one of my weaknesses I work with kids now and have been invested in treating kids well forever)#so me saying that apparently reminded her of max and she showed me a video of him with p and yeah it was very effective in making me like#him and then we left the episode on pause and she told me a lot about f1 and max specifically cause I was interested now lmao (funny thing#is that she also got roped into it by our other friends I swear it’s speeding lmao#she also compared him to Jamie from Ted lasso (if you know you know) and showed me some heart wrenching Taylor swift edits (i haven’t#emotionally recovered yet) and yeah that’s how I started consuming way too much f1 content on YouTube and got into this whole mess lmao#oh yeah our friends also made me and another friend make a Tier list for all the drivers based on vibes alone (cause I only knew a bit about#max at that time and the other one knew nothing really) which was very funny too#especially looking back at it (we did some of them so dirty lmao 😂)#I’ve also come to the conclusion that tumblr is still one of the least annoying platforms to engage with other people (still)#YouTube is full of hate comments about drivers and stuff it’s so annoying actually#not to mention Twitter but I don’t go there and probably never will 😂#I personally don’t enjoy fics and scenarios and shipping of real people cause it makes me a bit uncomfy (not judging people who do#you do you as long as it doesn’t negatively affect anyone#but yeah I’d much rather just scroll by those here than have to look away from all the mindless hate and which driver is better discussions#everywhere else like I’m not one to engage with stuff like that but it does upset me to some#degree so yeah tumblr making memes and being rather positive about their drivers (most of what I’ve seen here of course there are gonna be#annoying people everywhere) is much more tolerable and a lot more enjoyable for me#whoops this post got away from me again oh dear#I’ve had the idea for a meme stuck in my head for days now: Max verstappen but make it if you don’t love me at my *swearing on team radio#giving spicy replies and attitude to the media maxplaining and complaining going for risky overtakes* you don’t deserve me at my *precious#interactions with p talking about his cats being a goofball with other drivers and especially danny defending other drivers driving#beautifully in the rain* it’s a package deal you can’t just pick and choose and personally I don’t even get why people complain about some#of the other stuff I appreciate someone who’s passionate and honest and genuinely kind where it matters 🤷🏻♀️#I think I’ve seen someone else say that but the more people complain about and criticize max the more I feel the need to defend him#god forbid women have hobbies for real (can’t believe I’ve yapped so much I can’t put more tags 💀)#also shoutout to Oscar Piastri and Danny Ric (I was so happy Oscar won even tho McLaren where being very silly in a not so funny way)
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the chris meet and greet pics 💀
#idk why I find them so cringe#like ofc do what makes you happy!!!#but like…#250 dollars just to take a pic with him while he looks all disinterested and he won’t remember you or care about you???#I NEVER understood this about meet and greets#with any celeb of any calibre tbh#there’s no meaningful convo either#ur paying him to be forced to take a pic 😭💀#and he looks all half assed and uncomfortable and like he does not care#IDEK sorry I really don’t mean to offend anyone who’s ever paid for a meet and greet#my best friend paid for a meet and greet with one direction back in the day#I mean her parents did lol#but like… I say the same thing to her#so pls I don’t mean this in a mean way#more like I’m utterly confused by this concept#like…. I personally would hate to meet someone so inorganically#I’d never pay to meet another human being#for a fleeting few minutes#ugh idek
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One of my brothers is moving away to college today + I have to skip therapy, so it’s a lot of… a lot. a lot.
#he was just a baby! he was just a little kid I carried around and took care of!#no nope. not gonna get into it right now. I WILL cry. it’s not even 6am and I do not need that right now#and I don’t really know if therapy today would really help#if I got into it I’d just start crying in front of this nice dude for an hour#though yeah… might be nice to.. I dunno… just talk about it.#I am always simultaneously ‘therapy is good’ and ‘what’s the point in talking about it?’#so maybe I do need that person that’s like ‘this is your time. just fucking talk.’#but also right now it’s like… talking about it won’t take me back to when my brother was little and far off from leaving#blegh…#whatever. anyway. it’s gonna be a sad day. I’m gonna cry A LOT. I’m gonna be alone in this apartment and just sooooobbbbbbing#and then keep this inside for another week before I can go to therapy and talk about this bc god forbid I talk to a family member about it#ok now it’s 6am. I think he’s leaving in about 4 hours. it’s cool. it’ll be cool. 😎 I’ll just miss my bro so dang much#but maybe I’ll walk down to the dollar store and stock up on snacks and I’ll get blasted and fatter and try to stay positive#uggghhh#I’m too emotional#time just keeps moving for us all. to my dismay.#’time is the fire in which we burn’#you can ignore this#I don’t think I’ll ever have kids. I’ll never have kids. and being there. with him. with my brothers. that was the closest I’ll ever get.#and it’s over… so… 🤷🏻♂️… it’s just done… they’re grown. and I’m still here. I don’t know what else to say…#but that’s life. they’re doing their thing. I’m happy for them and I want them to be happy too. I’m just a big crybaby#IAN!… stop typing!#just making myself sad at this point#it’s fine. it’s fine. I’m fine. I’m cool. everything’s… cool 😎#this isn’t important#text
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