#if things are going to be miserable for the next 4 years i’m at least going to have fun reminding all the trumpers that this is their fault

[dragonanon]

I will say right now that I am a petty ass bitch. And I have PURPOSELY chosen NOT to cut off any friends or family that voted for Trump, for the SOLE reason that I’m playing the long con here. When shit goes sideways, I want to be the one who looks them all in the eye and say “Oh, you’re suffering now? Good! I fucking TOLD you this would happen. Now suffer. Asshole.”

I know for a FACT that once things start getting bad, those people are going to be the FIRST ones to bitch and moan about it. And I want front row seats to it so I can CONTINUOUSLY throw it in their faces that they were fucking wrong, and the current situation is ENTIRELY on them.

I’m going to be the smuggest, most insufferable, little shit about it. I will be sitting there with my iced mocha, listening to all their bitching, with the biggest grin on my face. And when they ask me why tf I’m so happy, I’m going to respond “Yeah it sucks, doesn’t it? I’m happy because now that you see it, I get to remind you that you CHOSE this. This entire nightmare is ENTIRELY your fault, and I am going to remind you of this fact each and every time this topic comes up, until the day I die. Now either choose something else to talk about, or STFU. Because I have NO sympathy for you. 😎💅”

[leqonsluv3r]

Hey, do you have a lot of requests rn?

I'd have a fic idea👀 so reader (female) would have been taken to Leon's family for some reason, been living there sometime now and Leon's dad just despises her and makes her do gross chores or whatnot, being mean for no reason, degrading a bit and Leon would let it happen, just kinda watch from aside but quickly enough he'd feel bad and would apologize for his dad behavior and tell her that he (Leon) doesn't feel that way, that he actually likes having her around etc. He could be plotting to kick his dads ass for it but the reader would stop those thoughts, then they'd talk and some things leads to others and soon they're making out and they have sex?! 🫣 You can decide if either one is a virgin or both🤔

my own cinderella

—re!4 leon kennedy x fem!reader

—a oneshot (request)

masterlist taglist

warnings: MDNI, 18+, virgin!reader, kinda dom!leon, best friends to lovers, leon’s dad being an asshole, reader is definitely like cinderella (loosely), grinding, lots of kissing and making out, unprotected pnv action, he’s soft with reader but not rough either (if that makes any sense lmao), they both love each other but they’re too chicken shit to admit it, reader is female and uses (she/her) pronouns, leon calls reader princess, nipple play, oral (f receiving), aftercare.

“she’s the sweetest thing in his life. always has been since they were kids, she was the lace to his leather. the flowers to his dirt, the sugar to his salt. so when he needs her, as her best friend. he takes her in, takes care of her. as they get older, he grows attached. having her living in his house, living this close. he needs to help her, to love her. his father is taking advantage of her, letting her pay him back in chores. she was his princess, he needed to save her. what better way then to just have her all to himself?”

—or leon gets his very own cinderella and gives her the happy ending she deserves

an: i’m so sorry this took so long to get written. my life has been a crazy mess lately. i’m still unpacking and decorating my new place, working and all the other shit that comes with life. i hope this is what you wanted, pls reblog and like, i appreciate it <3 it’s super long, a gift for being MIA for so long my lovelies.

she started living with leon and his family when she was around 15. it wasn’t her first choice of course, she was supposed to go live with her aunt in maine. but leon was one of her best friends, they were practically next door neighbors.

but when her aunt was tested for drugs and came back as an unfit guardian for her, leon’s father stepped in and made sure she had a place to live.

she loved that she had a place to stay, especially with leon around. everything wasn’t so scary. her parents getting sent to jail for embezzlement…wasn’t on her bingo card for that year. but leon made it okay, he made her laugh and he made sure she was comfortable staying with him and his family.

she got to keep attending the same private school as he did, got to experience life with her friends. she got somewhat of a happy ending.

at least that’s what it looked like from the outside.

what came with leon’s father taking guardianship over her, came with her getting the brunt of the chores. doing laundry for him and his family, cleaning all the rooms of the large house. it was things that she didn’t sign up for but she got to live in a large house with her best friend.

that was good enough? right?

wrong, even the years that passed as she became older became more difficult. especially when she turned 18 and the guardianship broke. she couldn’t leave because she had no money to her name, plus, leon’s dad offered to pay for her college courses.

so on-top of trying to attend lectures and do the loads of homework that came with being a college student. she had to stay and keep “working” around the house that should’ve been her sanctuary that was anything but.

she felt miserable but it wasn’t all bad, leon stayed home with her. he took a gap year, plus his dad was away a lot. she knew she should keep her wandering eyes to herself, that she shouldn’t have a crush on her bestfriend. she should just mind her own business and work until she can pay off her debt.

but no, he was there.

he was so handsome. so sweet to her, he always had been. she didn’t know how he was still single. he had the money, the title that came with his last name and the looks. if she was any other girl, she would’ve snatched him up by now.

but this was a different reality, leon was her friend. she couldn’t think of another reality where he was anything but that. where his thoughts were anything past platonic.

only if she saw the times he would look at her when she was bending over to clean, the times she didn’t see him looking. the dark blue of his eyes tracing her curves with just a small widening of his irises.

then she would know his thoughts were way past platonic and had been for a very long time.

one day in particular, leon’s dad was gone on a buisness trip. she had cleaned the entire house with the help of the maids, making sure her list of tasks was completed for her “guardians” approval.

she was sitting in her room, looking at the assignments on her desk. she knew she had so many classes that she needed to finish her assignments for. she had just been so busy with her chores or tasks, she hadn’t even had time to start her homework.

she started working and as she did, she got so immersed into it that she didn’t notice leon who was standing at her open bedroom doorway.

he cleared his throat and she whipped around in her desk chair, “christ! leon!” she says with a small gasp as she looked at him. he crossed his arms over his chest, “studying hard, princess?” he says with one of his famous smirks on his face.

the nickname he always called her had stuck from childhood and it still made her blush, she tipped her lips up in a crooked grin. “i didn’t know you’d be home today.”

he shrugs and walks into her bedroom, looking around at all the various things hung on the walls, he sees a couple pictures of them as kids. “i had an off day.” he says as he smiles at the picture of the them as kids.

she follows his eyes and tilts her head, “do you remember that?” she gets up from the desk chair and stands beside him, looking at the pictures on the cork board.

he looks from the cork board full of miscellaneous pictures of them, the one he saw in particular was a picture of them when they were 11 and they were getting they’re faces painted. she remembers that day, it was one of the happiest days she’d ever had. her parents were not in jail, her and leon were happy kids and things hadn’t gone to shit yet.

he nods, “yeah, that was a good day.” he says with a look of nostalgia on his face. he was the only constant good thing in her life and they both knew that. the only good thing she could rely on.

he has the urge to tell her things that he’s said a thousand times, but now it feels different since the change inside of him.

since he started looking at her differently, since he started feeling things deep down that he normally wouldn’t feel in a situation like this.

but his best friend was living with him, had been living with him for years because of her parents. his dad had been kind, gracious even and offered her a roof.

he knew that she worked her ass off, made the house and the mansion look impeccable with the help of the maids hired by his father.

but he still wanted her, wanted to take her away. he wanted to do something, he wanted her. he needed her and he was going to have her.

one way or another.

because she was his princess and she deserved more then what was given to her.

later that night, he was staying home instead of going out. normally on a friday night he would be hanging with his friends or going to the bar. but tonight, he was staying home.

he didn’t know how much longer he could take of watching her move around his orbit and not be his. how much menial labor he could watch her do for his father until he snapped. he wanted to scream and yell at his father, tell him it was unfair. but it was like trying to convince an ocean not to be blue, completely out of nature.

but he wanted to give her a break, give her something that she could latch onto so things didn’t seem so terrible. he already had her as a best friend, his love…went way beyond platonic.

so did his attraction.

so he offered for her to watch a movie with him, like when they both were kids.

she had obliged, she needed a break from studying and homework anyways. she was coming up on her midterms for her classes at college and she was losing her mind.

so this was a welcome distraction, he was also the welcome distraction. she had noticed changes over the years in him, his hair and his facial structure. more importantly, he’d been going to the gym. a lot.

his muscles almost needed their own names, they were a part of them. but they were huge. she had never seen muscles that big on any man ever. he could probably crush her like a grape, the thought was welcoming as it was arousing.

she shouldn’t be attracted to her best friend, not when she’s living under his dads roof and basically living here somewhat rent free.

but she was a girl, she had eyes. how could she not ogle him when he was mowing the lawn or had come back all sweaty from the gym? it was human nature. that was her justification in her mind, she was free to look but not to touch.

she’d ruin her friendship and her living situation if she even kissed him.

at least that’s what she thought.

they had been watching the movie for about 30 minutes when she felt his hand on her leg. she didn’t think much of it at first, it didn’t bother her.

she just thought that maybe it was accident and maybe he was just needing some comfort. excuses that she made up in her mind to make herself try and not feel the attraction that was pulsing in between her thighs.

she shifted under his hand on her thigh, letting him rest it there comfortably. out of the corner of her eye she could see the way his hand laid there almost protectively.

however, about halfway through the movie his hand was holding protectively and tightly to her inner thigh. so close and yet so far from where her clit was pulsing beneath her sweats.

she licked her lips, her mouth feeling dry. she didn’t dare look over in his direction, then he would know that this was affecting her. that his possessive and small hold on her leg was affecting every nerve ending in her body.

she prayed that he would just forget it, move his hand away. that was one part of her anyway, the other part wanted him to dip his fingers underneath her underwear and sweatpants.

but the was the horny part of her.

she swallowed when he gripped the fat of her thigh, hard. making her clit pulse in her panties and her pussy practically start drooling. she keeps her eyes on the tv, trying to get rid of the not so PG thoughts that were circulating around her brain.

but he was determined, unbeknownst to her.

he leaned over next to her and brushed some hair back behind her ear with his free hand, making her shiver. “got something on your mind, princess?” he says in a low timbre that she had never heard before.

she felt something inside of her change after he said that, his hand still roughly gripping at her thigh. she willed her mouth to work and words to leave it. she shakily exhaled, “leon…your hand on my thigh…” she says weakly.

she wish it would’ve come out better, not the words she would’ve opted before but it was something. she felt nervous, aroused and a million other things all at once. her virgin body didn’t know how much more it could handle.

“what about it?” he whispers as he lowers his mouth to nip at the shell of her ear, she felt like that alone would make her moan but she tucked her bottom lip between her teeth, keeping quiet.

“feels good…” she mumbles out as she leans into his touch on her leg, trying to subtly get his fingers to move closer to where she really needed them. he chuckles softly against her ear, “poor baby, i’m touching your thigh and your already a mess.”

his mocking only furthered her arousal, made her underwear uncomfortably wet. she turned her face to look at him, her nose brushing against his. their close proximity on the couch made her mind fuzzier then usual.

“you sure about this, princess?” he says softly against her lips, their breath mingling together. she thinks for a second, feeling the warmth of him and his hand squeezing her thigh roughly but with a tender sweep of his thumb.

does she want to ruin her friendship for the attraction she’s feeling? yes, yes she does. she might regret this later but a part of her thinks she can trust him. she’s known him for years, he’s her best friend, they’ve seen each other at their worst.

so when she says, “yes.” she doesn’t regret what happens next.

he smirks widely against her lips, his hand squeezes her thigh more. his lips press against her and she moans a little against his lips.

they make out for what feels like an eternity, her hands intertwined into his hair and their lips never leaving each others. the movie drowning on in the background and they both couldn’t care less.

she ends up on top of his lap, not even noticing that she’s grinding on his pants. she knows what it is she’s grinding against, she wasn’t born yesterday. she’s read smut book upon smut book in her lifetime.

he groans against her lips, carding a hand into her own hair and tugging on it as he feels her grind against his erection in his pants. “keep doing that and i’ll bust in my pants.” he whispers with a low husky chuckle in between kisses.

she feels her cheeks flush, “sorry.” she whispers with a tinge of embarrassment in her features, pulling back a little and her movements against his hips stopping. he brushes some hair out of her face, seeing her pink flushed cheeks.

“don’t be sorry, princess. i just don’t think you understand what your doing.” he says with a small daze in his eyes, she finds herself leaning into his touch on her hair. she blinks at him, “i knew what i was doing…i think?” she says with a small doubtful furrow of her brows.

he shakes his head and laughs, knowing that she knew some things but probably not a lot. “let me ask you something, okay? from one best friend to another?” he says with a small tilt of his head, letting his hands coast down to her hips and hold her protectively.

she nods and blinks at him, adjusting herself on his lap a little. he takes a deep breath and gives her a reassuring smile, “are you still a virgin?” he asks her softly, not a hint of judgement in his voice. there’s was no ulterior motive, he just wanted to know.

she swallows and nods, letting a shaky breath leave her pink lips. he kneads at her skin between her sweats and her top, making sure he can comfort her in some way. he knew that she never got anywhere with guys, half the ones she chose were complete idiots anyways.

“do you want to lose it?” he says softly, another gentle question that’s not close to being an ulterior motive. he just wants to understand where her head is at right now since they kissed.

“i do…i mean, yeah.” she shrugs as she stumbles over her words a little, her cheeks still flushed easily. he thought that the way her cheeks turned red, her eyes wide and docile. it was cute, it was something that only she could pull off. if any other girl did that with him, he would be gone in a matter of minutes.

but she was different. she wanted to lose it. he just needed to make sure, make sure she understood what he was going to ask next.

“well, if you wanna lose it…i’ll give that to you.” he says gently as he caresses the skin of her hips. she blinks at him, still feeling the blush on her cheeks. she doesn’t know how to feel, should she feel nervous? feel like the butterflies are going to burst out of her stomach?

he was giving her an opportunity to lose it, to take care of her, make her feel better. he was her best friend, she trusted him more then anything. but still, she felt nervous. he would be seeing her naked, it would be intimate and vulnerable.

but also, she loved him deep down in a way that was way more then platonic.

so that’s why she leaned forward and kissed him, pressing a kiss to his lips. he smiled against her lips and gripped her hips tighter, taking her kiss as an answer.

“are you sure?” he mumbles in between kisses, making sure she’s not going to regret this later when it’s over. she nods and keeps kissing him, resuming her movements on his hips, moving them against his erection that was still very much there in his boxers and jeans.

she moans softly against his lips as she keeps grinding on him. she wraps her arms around his neck and carding her hands into his hair. she’s taking it one step at a time, listening to her gut and the butterflies swarming it.

he keeps his hands on her hips, almost guiding her as she rolls her hips over his. he groans against her lips, keeping her with him. he doesn’t want to ever let her go.

he didn’t realize that the butterflies in his own stomach were swarming wildly, attacking him when he was keeping her this close. all it took was kissing her, teasing her, holding her ontop of him.

it was years of friendship that had bubbled up into something that they both ignored until now.

he lightly guides her to lay back on the couch, pressing his chest against her own, their lips still moving against each other in a soft tangle of lips, tongues and teeth.

“princess, i’m gonna get you ready for me, okay?” he says when he pulls away from her lips, looking into her eyes. he’s going to take good care of her, as her best friend and someone who has had feelings for her for years.

she nods slowly up at him, he sees the nerves in her eyes. “if you want me to stop at any time, you tell me okay? and i will. i don’t want you to be uncomfortable, i would never want you to be.” he says gently as he brushes some hair out of her face.

“i will, i promise.” she whispers, the nervous energy thrumming through her body was put at ease a little by his words. “okay, princess.” he whispers softly as he leans down and presses kisses along her jawline to the collar of her shirt.

“such a pretty girl…” he whispers in between kisses to her neck, one of his hands going under her shirt and tracing the soft skin of her stomach.

she feels herself get more aroused with every kiss and word he says, helping her take off her shirt. he is gentle with his movements, taking off each piece of her clothing until she’s down to her bra and panties.

he leans back between her spread legs on the couch, admiring the way she looks all flushed and half-naked on the couch, she really is a dream. he feels more protective of her now, possessive, like he needs to keep her for himself.

the part of him that’s almost primal, a part he would like to keep hidden but he doesn’t know how much longer he can, not when he’s about to take her virginity.

“god, your so beautiful.” he says softly, his eyes roving over her frame. she feels her cheeks heat up all over again, wanting to hide from the embarrassment and just the way he’s eating her alive with his blue eyes.

he doesn’t let her hide, he leans down and presses his lips to the skin of her breast right where her bra is hiding her breasts. “good fucking…” he growls as he nips at the skin of her breast.

her body is shaking and she lets out some whimpers, squirming a little underneath him on the couch. “i’m gonna take your bra off, see these beautiful titties you’re hiding from me.” he says with another nip right above her bra.

she nodded and grabbed at his shirt, “take yours off.” she says with a small pant of her lips. he chuckles lowly and leans back on his haunches in between her legs.

he strips off his own t-shirt to showcase the soft muscles and planes of skin, she’s seen him shirtless before but these circumstances were far different. she lets out a breathy exhale.

“your turn.” he says with a small chuckle as he leans down and pulls down the bra straps on her bra. “lean up,” he guides her up so he can reach around and unclip it on the back.

finally, her bra is off and he throws it with her other clothes on the floor. he looks at her breasts, a groan leaving his lips. “my fucking…god, princess.” he says with a small sigh, he’s trying his best not to bust in his pants at the sight of her bare.

he doesn’t even hesitate as he leans down and captures one of her breasts in his mouth, using his other hand to pinch and pull at her nipple. he’s feasting on her like he’s a man starved.

she feels her underwear practically drenched at this point, moaning and gripping at his hair to keep his mouth on her.

she’s never felt like this before and he hasn’t really even done anything yet. she arches her back more, pushing her breast into his mouth more.

he swirls his tongue around her breast, feeling his cock straining in his pants, if he doesn’t release it soon…it’s going to bust in his pants.

he groans around her nipple and then moves to the next one giving it the same attention he just gave the other one, her body shaking and writhing beneath him like crazy.

he trails his lips away from her breasts, kissing down the plane of her stomach until he reaches the band of her underwear. he looks up at her from between her legs and silently asks her for permission.

she nods down at him and he hooks his fingers in the band of her underwear, pulling them down over her hips and tossing them with the rest of her clothes. he pulls back to marvel at her wet folds, how completely wrecked she is and he hasn’t even done that much yet.

the thought that he’s the first one to do any of this, touch her body like this, it drives him insane. it makes him almost feral as he leans in between her legs, keeping her thighs open and pressing kisses to the skin of her inner thighs.

“so fucking gorgeous, princess. is this all for me?” he grumbles lowly against the skin of her thighs, she feels the flushed skin of her cheeks heat up more.

the compliment only making her more aroused, practically painful at this point. she licks her dried lips, “yes…all for you.” she mumbles as she tries to control her breathing.

he chuckles against the skin of her inner thigh, still going farther down to her core. she feels her chest rise and falling faster and faster, those nerves returning as he leans down and presses a kiss to her clit.

her body instantly reacting, he loops his hands around her thighs and keeps them open. he presses more kisses to her clit until she’s a moaning mess, finally deciding to put her out of her misery.

he licks a stripe up her wet slit with his tongue, she moans softly and tilts her head back against the couch. she has never felt anything like this before, a whole other feeling that she couldn’t get from her fingers or a toy.

he keeps licking over her slit, practically drinking her up and devouring her like she was a five course meal. he uses one of his hands and plunges two fingers into her dripping entrance.

he had to prep her, he didn’t want to completely just rush in and hurt her. it didn’t matter how wet she was, he didn’t want to risk it.

she feels that feeling in her belly warm up and coil tighter, she starts shaking and moaning more, her moans growing in pitch. “so close…” she whimpers as he keeps plunging his fingers in and out of her entrance.

“mhm, gonna come all over my fingers like a good girl.” he mumbles softly, almost a feline smile on his lips as he presses a kiss to her slit and licks it as he keeps fingering her, his words twisted that coil tighter.

she feels herself fall apart after a few more pumps of his fingers and then another kiss to her clit, working her through her orgasm. he’s trying to be gentle, take his time but it’s hard when he’s watching her fall apart like that.

“so good, you did so good.” he praises lowly as he kisses up from her slit, over her stomach and breasts, then kisses her lips. she moans softly against his lips, tasting her own release on his mouth. she feels the fingers that were inside of her, trailing over her stomach.

his hand grabbing at her breast and squeezing it as he keeps kissing her. he pulls away slowly and looks down at her flushed face, “your so beautiful.” he whispers as he looks at her with nothing but admiration in his eyes.

she smiles lazily up at him, “thank you.” she whispers with a small pant out of her lips, he strokes some more hair out of her face. “you did amazing.” he whispers softly as he looks down at her.

the praise melts her into a puddle, still wet and probably leaking all over his dads couch. she doesn’t even care at this point. his dad was a whole other issue entirely that she didn’t want to even think of when she was with him.

it was just her and leon right now, the outside world ceased to exist.

“do you want me to keep going, princess?” he says with a small sigh as he traces lines down her stomach and down to her hips.

she thinks about it, about all of it. about his hands on her body and about the way he touches her so tenderly. how he’s not forcing her, how much she trusts him.

she can’t say no now, she can’t back out.

she licks her lips, “yeah, i want you to keep going. i want it.” she whispers as she looks up at him.

he smiles a boyish grin that makes her heart flutter uncontrollably, one that she’s seen a thousand times and it makes her breath catch. he presses a soft kiss to her lips, “i can do that. if it hurts too much, let me know. let me know and we can stop, okay? i already told you…” he trails off and she smiles softly up at him.

“yeah, i know. you’ve said that already.” she giggles softly as he leans back on his knees again in between her legs on the couch. “i know, i just…i want you to feel comfortable. i love you.” he mumbles the last part and if she wasn’t really listening, she wouldn’t have caught it.

but she did.

i love you. i love you. i love you.

it was echoing through her brain as he took off his pants and boxers, mixing her brain and making her all warm and fuzzy on the inside.

even when she saw his cock, all hard and long, the precum oozing out of the tip. she shakily exhales, the beating of her heart intensifies. she doesn’t know if it’s from his confession or the fact that his erection is just out.

she’s seeing him naked, fully naked. they match each other now, fully bare in front of each other. they can’t go back to normal after this, a reality she doesn’t want to face yet.

especially after…

i love you. i love you. i love you.

she looks up at him, reaching out for his arm as he starts to lean over her. he looks at her, his blue eyes linking with her own eyes. “what? what’s that look on your face for?” he says huskily as he takes in the look of admiration and lust in her eyes.

“you love me?” she whispers shakily, doesn’t feel like it’s falling out of her lips. he feels his breath catch and then escape, he can’t lie to her. not when she heard it. when she was naked and beautiful, everything he’s ever wanted wrapped up underneath him.

“i do, i love you…i think i’ve loved you for a long time.” he whispers as he slots himself between her legs, his cock rubbing against her wet folds. the intimacy, she thought she would hate it, run from it. but no, she was here with him and this was happening.

the words made this moment more sweet and memorable, the ache in her heart was bittersweet. to know that the feeling that she kept hidden for so long was reciprocated.

“i love you too. in a non-platonic way.” she whispers with a small nervous smile as she reaches up and touches the skin of his cheekbone.

he has that boyish smirk on his face as he hovers over her, looking into her eyes and tracing the lines of her face. “you do, huh? how long…?” he says with a small bit of teasing in his voice.

her arousal still uncomfortable but she put it on the back burner for now, she was finally getting to confess. finally getting to tell him all she felt for him over their years of friendship.

“maybe three or four years? i don’t know.” she giggles softly, “i couldn’t explain when it started.” she whispers as she traces a line down his jaw and over the moles on his neck.

“that’s okay, princess. i don’t need a timeline. i’m just glad you love me back, that’s all i could ever want from you.” he says softly and he’s almost sentimental deep down underneath it all.

but his dick is still rock hard against her wet folds. she doesn’t feel it go unnoticed, not any of this. “that and my virginity.” she jokes poorly as she smiles shyly up at him.

he shakes his head, smirking playfully, “no, you’re giving it to me. there’s a difference. i’m gonna make it so good for you. it’s what someone like you deserves.” he says sweetly as he leans down and presses a firm but soft kiss against her lips.

she sighs against his lips, wrapping her arms around his neck as he hovers over her. they love each other, it’s echoing in his brain and he doesn’t want it to ever disappear.

he slips his hand in between them and guides his cock through her wet folds, coating it with arousal and causing her to moan into his kiss. he hovers his lips over hers, “just relax, take a deep breath or it’s going to hurt.” he says gently as he nudges the tip of his cock into her entrance.

she nods and cards a hand into his hair, following his gentle command and taking deep breaths. he gently slides in inch by inch, letting her breathe through it. “it’s okay, you can take it.” he whispers softly, pressing a kiss to the corner of her lips.

she heaved a small breath, his cock slipping farther and farther in until he was fully sheathed inside of her. he stills for a couple moments, reading her expression.

“are you okay? does it hurt?” he asks gently as he caresses her cheek, she takes a shaky inhale and exhale. “not as bad…” she whispers softly as she looks up at him.

she feels a small sting, he’s definitely bigger then she expected. “take a moment, adjust and then i’ll move.” he says as he presses another soft kiss to her lips.

he stays still for a moment until she nods slowly, gesturing for him to move. he doesn’t hesitate, he slowly starts rocking his hips against hers.

she feels her eyes squeeze shut, she feels so full and just so happy. everything feels blissful like she’s on cloud nine. he presses a kiss to her neck, burying his head there as he keeps rolling his hips against hers. she wraps her arms around his neck and then her legs around his hips.

her pussy was squeezing him and it was hard for him to hold back, she was so tight, he was trying to control himself as best as he could.

“fuck…so tight…” he mumbles against her neck as he keeps rolling his hips, he goes a little bit harder. his hips rolling a little bit deeper and faster.

she leans her head back, her lips parted in bliss as she moans and whimpers. her little noises only making him more desperate to give her what she wants.

i love you. i love you. i love you.

it echoes through both of their brains simultaneously as they bring each other closer and closer to the edge. she’s so sweet, so good to him, always been the girl that he can go to.

been her best friend, been her confidant. he even gave her a place to stay, he helped her. her moans and his groans mingling together like sweet music as he keeps pounding his hips into hers.

“sweet girl, so fucking beautiful.” mumbled praises and compliments in between every thrust of his hips, her lips parting. she’s never looked more beautiful then right now. offering herself to him and him gladly obliging.

she’s melting underneath him, she’s close. she can feel it. he can feel the way she’s clenching around his cock, her moans growing in pitch. “don’t worry, princess. gonna let you come all over my cock.” he groans as he presses kisses all over her jaw.

that only spurs her on further, she feels it snap before she can even say anything, her nails digging into his back. she feels her body shaking as she comes all over his cock.

“oh fuck…” he groans as he feels her clench and coat his fuck in her come. he keeps rolling his hips, fucking her through her orgasm to chase his own release.

“i’m almost there, i’m almost there…” he repeats over and over as he keeps fucking into her, her eyes almost rolling into the back of her head from the overstimulation.

he keeps going until it was almost unbearable for her, his cock shooting ropes of come into her, a loud moan leaving his lips. he just kept his dick inside of her, waiting for it to soften. he needed to catch his breath, he feels like that orgasm took everything out of the both of them.

he pulls back a little to look into her eyes, “was it good? are you okay?” she blissfully smiles up at him in return. “it was perfect, felt good.” she mumbles with a small blink of her eyes.

“god, your so fucking good, princess.” he whispers in a low voice as he presses a gentle and loving kiss against her lips. she smiles against it, rubbing her hands over the small scratches on his back in a soothing gesture.

he pours all his love into the kiss, making sure she knew that he loved her, genuinely. this wasn’t just something he said to get her underneath him.

he loved her, she loved him.

i love you. i love you. i love you.

he leans back and pulls himself off of her, “im gonna clean us up, okay?” he says with a small gentle smile, slowly pulling his cock out of her entrance.

she sighs softly at the loss of his cock, feeling herself flutter around nothing. he strokes a hand over her stomach, “stay here.” he says firmly as he gets up, pulling his boxers back on. he walks into the kitchen down the long hallway, grabbing a damp paper towel and walking back.

he sits down next to her on the couch, her eyes slowly opening and closing from the exhaustion of the two orgasms she experienced. he wipes gently in between her legs, cleaning up their shared arousal.

“your okay, your okay.” he caresses her stomach in gentle rubs as he cleans in between her. she laughs a little as she looks over at the tv on the far wall of the living room.

he follows her eyes, seeing the reason for the laughter. the movies credits were rolling, he shakes his head. “if you want to actually watch it tomorrow, we can.” he says with a small teasing grin.

“if you can keep your hands off me tomorrow.” she says with a lazy smirk as she looks over at him. he gets up to throw away the paper towel, “don’t worry, i think i can manage.” he jokes.

she slowly sits up on the couch, looking at him, “do you think…your dad will kick me out when he finds out about us?” she says with a small bite to her bottom lip. he shakes his head, a small sigh leaving his lips.

he grabs his t-shirt and her underwear, handing them to her to put on. he sits down next to her as she slips the underwear over her hips and puts on his t-shirt. “don’t worry about him, i can handle him. if he has a problem we can always move out.” he says with a small smile, brushing some hair out of her face.

he continues, “i won’t leave you here with him. wherever you go, i go.” he says gently as he presses a kiss to her forehead. “your mine now, okay? you might not have agreed to it yet. but i’m not gonna let you stay here with him.” she feels her eyes swell up a little bit with tears.

just the love that he’s always had for her coming out 10x stronger than before, the whispered confessions before he took her virginity.

she smiles almost brokenly at him, a heartbreaking smile that he wants to make go away. he pulls her closer to him on the couch, wrapping his arms around her.

“i’ll follow you wherever you go.” she whispers against his bare chest, sniffling a little as she tries to keep the lump of tears at bay.

“i know you will.” he says with a small chuckle, pressing a kiss against the side of her hair. he rubs his hands over her back, the material of his t-shirt that she’s wearing kissing his palms.

“i love you.” she says softly into his chest, her breath shaky and trembling. he presses a kiss to the top of her head again, solidifying the words with his actions. “i love you too, princess. always have, always will.” he whispers tenderly against her skull.

he would always love her, he didn’t think he could ever stop. she would stick with him, he would take her away and make her happy. she’d never have to do another chore again, not if he had anything to say about it.

he rescued his princess, he won.

that mattered more then anything else.

taglist: @elihii @heartsforvin @argreion @sqiim @adollrable @leonkennedygvrl @laceycoffins @porcelainseashore @squazmine (if you want to be added interact with the link at the beginning <3)

[cozage]

The Moss that Grew in Gloom

Chapter 4: Celebrating the Little Things

Start From Beginning | Next Chapter | Masterlist | Read on AO3

Summary: As the daughter of the best swordsman in the world, your life has been a lonely one. You've never minded the quiet life, until a mossy-haired swordsman falls to your island and shakes things up. Word Count: 1.3k Characters: female reader x Zoro

You decided to read for another hour before you risked venturing up to the third story. Based on a lifetime with your father, you knew it took him 15 minutes to get ready for bed, then 15 minutes to fall asleep. But you wanted to make sure he was in a deep sleep before you made any noise that might wake him. 

You crept past your fathers door and down the hall to Zoro’s new bedroom. You knocked softly on his door, trying your best not to disturb your father. He was a few rooms down, but he had always been a light sleeper. 

Zoro softly opened the door with a light creak, and you held up two bottles of wine and two glasses. “Celebration time!” You cheered quietly, raising the wine bottles in the air. 

Zoro frowned. “Just two?” he asked, looking at the bottles with disappointment. 

You rolled your eyes and sauntered past him into the room. You waited until his door had shut before you talked more freely. “We’re celebrating,” you hissed. “Not getting drunk off our ass!”

“Boring,” he said, but you could see a teasing smile dance across his lips. 

“Wanna make it a competition?” you asked, holding out a bottle to the swordsman. 

He raised an eyebrow as he took the bottle. “You’ll lose.”

You could tell by the tone of his voice that he wasn’t bluffing. You didn’t doubt it either; you had seen him down alcohol at dinner. The substance barely affected him, even after several bottles. If it were a drinking contest, you were certain you’d lose miserably. 

“Not quite what you’re thinking,” you said. “Whoever can cut the cleanest cut across the bottle wins.”

Zoro laughed, turning the bottle over in his hand. He looked at the label, and you watched as his eyes practically popped out of their sockets when he saw the price tag. 

He clicked his tongue disapprovingly. “You can’t risk wasting such good alcohol for a competition.”

You bit your lip, trying to suppress a smile. “Scared to lose?” you asked innocently. You could see irritation spring up in his expression from your taunting. “We don’t have bottle openers anyway. You’ll have to slice it open.”

“Why the hell don’t you have a bottle opener?!” He demanded, his voice rising.

“Shush!” you hissed. “I don’t want to wake the others! Unless you want to share.”

Zoro frowned, obviously not wanting to lose his celebratory bottle. 

You placed your bottle on the floor and held out Nikko, readying yourself to make the cut. Zoro did the same, looking at the bottle uneasily. 

“If anything, I’m at a disadvantage. The teeth on Nikko could shatter the entire bottle.”

Zoro scoffed. “If you break yours, I’m not sharing.”

You sliced at the bottle without another word, a perfect cut across the neck. You suppressed a smile. Your father had always said there was no point for bottle openers; if you were too sloppy to open a bottle with a sword, you didn’t deserve to drink its contents. 

Zoro went next. There was some slight hesitation in his movement, but he was strong and had a good grip on the sword. The cut was clean, though upon further examination, not perfect. 

You clicked your tongue. “I see an imperfection right here.” You shook your head. “I think that means I won.”

“Oh piss off!” Zoro grabbed his bottle from your critical gaze and took a long swig. 

You grabbed your own bottle and sat down on the floor, savoring the rich flavors of the wine. It had to be at least 20 years old. Your father always picked the best wine when he was away. 

“So, you’re going to be the best swordsman some day?” you asked, trying to make small talk. 

“I am.” He let out a deep sigh. “This is damn good wine.”

“Why do you want to be the best?” you asked, looking at him inquisitively. 

He bit his lip, waiting a moment before he responded. “I made a promise.”

You raised an eyebrow. “To your captain?”

“No.”

The shortness of his answer surprised you. “Then to who?” 

He gritted his teeth. “Can you stop with the questions?”

His irritation made your face burn, and you took a long drink of wine to cover it up. It had been a long time since you had constant interaction with another human being who wasn’t your father. 

Sure, you had gone on small missions, but you had never gotten to know anyone. You were usually killing people or sneaking around, finding the highest bounty pirates you could so you could return home with some money. 

Being with Zoro was nothing like that. 

“Sorry,” he muttered. “I just don’t like talking about it.”

“That’s okay,” you said quietly, taking another drink.

“What about you?” Zoro asked. “Don’t you want to be the best?”

You shrugged. “Not really. I just want to be good enough to survive in the outside world.”

Zoro gave a dry laugh. “Trust me sweetheart, you’d be one of the best anywhere on the Grand Line.”

His compliment made your face flush again, and a heavy silence fell between you two. You weren’t sure how to tell him that even if you wanted to leave the island, you had nowhere to go. You could survive on the Grand Line, but you weren’t entirely sure what you wanted to do if you left Gloom Island. You had no idea who you wanted to be. 

“Thanks again for today,” Zoro said, finally bringing you back from your thoughts. 

You waved him off. “It was nothing.”

“It was everything,” he said, looking in your eyes. 

You weren’t sure when he had gotten so close to you. You could feel his body heat radiating off of him. You tried to blink a few times to clear your head, but your thoughts grew cloudy again the moment you looked at his slate-gray eyes. The wine must’ve gone to your head faster than you anticipated.

You weren’t sure why, but the alarm bells in your brain were ringing. Dangerous territory. You shouldn’t be here with him. Your father’s enemy. The one who would bring him down. You shouldn’t have come here. And yet all you wanted to do was move closer. 

You finally found the words you were looking for, and they came out in a whisper. “Whenever you need help, just let me know.”

He gave a small smile. “Tomorrow then. You’ll help me infuse the haki into my sword?”

You scowled, pulling back from him and taking a drink of wine. “You’re at least a month away from trying that, Roronoa.”

“I have a good teacher.”

You gave a light chuckle, finishing off the last of your wine and setting the bottle down. “That’s why I gave you a month.”

“Call me Zoro.” He set down his bottle and shook his head. “No need for the honorifics if you’re going to be training me.”

You weren’t sure why it mattered, but you nodded. 

Your body felt heavy, the wine coursing through your bloodstream. You needed to get to bed before you started feeling the negative effects of the alcohol. You stood to your feet, heading for the door, swaying much more than you intended to. 

“Let me walk you back to your room.”

You snorted. “You’d get hopelessly lost if you tried that.”

He narrowed his eyes at you. “I think I can find my way back to my room.”

“I don’t!” you barked out another laugh, the wine amplifying your giddiness. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

You could feel his eyes on you as you opened the door, and you turned back to him one last time. “Goodnight, Roronoa Zoro.”

His eyes bore into your soul as he said, “Goodnight.”

You could feel his gaze on you as you gave him one last smile. You could feel him staring at you, even as you quietly shut his door. And you could’ve sworn his eyes followed you all the way back to your room, until you fell into your bed and promptly fell asleep for the night. 

[mochinek0]

Unexpected Angel (2/4)

First

Marinette chugged the rest of her coffee, the moment she spotted Carrie by her desk. She threw the cup away and sighed.

Carrie smiled, "There you are. Here I was thinking that you left early. You're late coming back for lunch."

"Actually, I'm five minutes early." Marinette pointed out.

Carrie glared at her, "Copy all these papers and make sure there are at least twenty-five pages each. You should be able to do that in three hours, right?" and walked away.

Marinette looked at the stack of papers. There were at least fifty pages. Sure, she could do that and get it done in three hours, but she also had to finish a design by the time she clocked out of work today. Her boss was counting on her. They needed to start on the samples next week, if it was approved. Mairnette sat down at her desk and looked at the designs. The color green caught her eye. It reminded her of the stranger from the café.

'That place is survival of the fittest.'

Marinette looked between her design and the stack of paper. She smiled and turned towards the deisgn.

'Sorry, Carrie.'

Carrie smiled as she approached the new girl's desk. She expected to find her buried and scrambling to get the papers in order. Instead, she found her sitting at her desk and humming.

"Where are my papers?" she cried, "Did you leave them at the machine again?"

"They are right here." Marinette smiled, "Right where you left them."

"I told you to do them!" Carrie screamed, "There's a meeting in fifteen minutes."

"Then, you should get to it." Mari replied, "I can't imagine not having the correct information for a meeting. That sounds really important."

"You little bitch!" Carrie shouted, slapping Marinette.

Marinette just smiled at the vindictive lady, "Sorry, but I have my own job to do. I don't have time to do your job. What have you been doing for the last three hours? So much wasted time. I mean, is your job that hard that your can't copy papers? You've been at this for five years. No offense, but I don't want to be you in five years. Better get started, you have an important meeting in.....ten minutes."

Carrie snarled, grabbed the papers, and hurried away.

To say that Carrie was upset was an understatement. Her boss had yelled at her when the meeting was over. She had managed to print the first eight pages, but she was left entering and exiting the meeting to grab the other hot off the press. To top it off, she watched her boss praise Marinette.

"I knew I could count on you, Marinette." their boss spoke, "You had some difficulty this past month, but you have improved."

Marinette simply smiled, "Thank you for your kind words. I just....had to really focus on my work and not worry about other things."

Carried stomped out of Wayne Enterprise after that. All weekend she planned. She was going to leave her work with Mairnette and leave work as if she was sick, saying Marinette volunteered to do her work. If that didn't work, it wouldn't be her fault if her coffee accidentally spilled all over Marinette's desk. If the new girl was a better employee, her desk would be clean. Maybe it would help her with her time management skills. She was going to make Marinette miserable next week, as payback for making her look stupid in front of her boss.

TAG LIST: @animeweebgirl @a-star-with-a-human-name @meme991001 @vixen-uchiha @abrx2002 @alysrose-starchild @fandom-trapped-03 @dood-space @moonlightstar64 @saltymiraculer @marveldcedits20 @09shell-sea09 @icerosecrystal @animegirlweeb @insane-fangirl-of-everything @blueblossombliss @nickristus-dreamer @megawhitleycalderonpaganus��@missmadwoman @meira-3919 @wh0douthink @princessdaisysolosyourfaves @blep-23 @fangirlingfanatic @darkhinauniverse @ravenr22 @im-a-satanic-ritual @ravennm84

[owmylasagna-blog]

oh nooo i'm sorry you're sick lasagna :( i'm glad your skates came though that's exciting!! i'll still hit you up for some headcanons if you feel like sharing 👀 id love to hear more of your lore for the eds' parents and perhaps bro...

i'm trying to think of my own indulgent headcanon to share that i haven't already told you 🤔 i will say that your use of shania twain in lps made me hc that edd would secretly be a big fan of hers. i know it's kinda ooc but it's really funny to me. he's a sap and her songs can be pretty sappy. there's also a lot of pedal steel in her music which automatically makes me think of him.

oh also will ed and may's wedding be included in lps?

Thanks! I appreciate the message ❤️ I’m so jazzed the skates came! I immediately did a little shimmy around my tiny ass apartment and might take them for a spin on my street once the rain clears up.

Hmmm time to rack my brain for some other headcanons for the Eds’ parents. Let’s see:

I wrote this in like me still but I think Edd’s parents get a divorce once he’s 18. I sort of hint at this but in my mind his folks are more amicable colleagues than romantic partners: not that they don’t care for each other, but they know pretty early on after having Edd that they are more friends than husband and wife. They do a lot of things out of obligation and respectability.

While I imagine most of the parents in the cul-se-sac to know one another (possibly even have grown up together - we love intergenerational beaf), Edd’s parents are an enigma and literally never socialize. This rubs most of their neighbors the wrong way, really pisses off Eddy’s parents, especially his mom, who takes it super personally (and probably rightfully so).

Sort of a popular one, but I also like the idea of Ed and Eddy’s dads being business partners selling used cars. Or actually, Ed’s dad sort of being Eddy’s dad’s superior 👀.

I think Eddy’s parents (I come them Eddy and Carmela, or Lina for short) are middle school sweethearts. Eddy Sr. threw rocks at Lina during 7th grade recess and she beat him with a fence post and the rest is history.

I imagine Ed’s parents having a pretty big age gap, with his dad being like 10 years older than his mom. We all agree Ed’s mom is a miserable housewife, right? And that his dad is a shellshocked vet? Yes?

Okay this is gonna start out sorta dark but stay with me: in college I read this book called Rampage: The Social Roots of School Shootings which informs a lot of my headcanons on Bro. No I don’t think he did anything THAT drastic, but the book outlined more the conditions that cause kids with mental illness to be ignored for the sake up upholding the community appearance if that makes sense? Sweeping concerning behavior under the rug to not raise concern or point fingers at the parents or adults for failing. I sort of see peach creak as a similar town.

@gettingfrilly wrote this too and much more eloquently I might add but I always thought both Bro and Eddy have undiagnosed ADHD.

I could go on but I’ll stop there for everyone’s sake. I get more into Eddy’s family in the next chapters of Ed is Thicker than Mud (;

Hahahaha no I love Edd being a Shania fan 😂 sometimes headcanons that are a little ooc add to the world building. Dude contains multitudes. I also like to imagine Edd’s taste in music being a strange mix of experimental obscure + borderline cheesy (I was just listening to the OST for Xanadu by Olivia Newton-John/ELO that makes me think of Edd for some reason). But I’ve never thought of connecting the pedal steel guitar in Shania Twain’s music with Edd. Maybe he can serenade Eddy… 😛

Yes! The EdMay wedding is meant to be the last chapter *cough* I mean. The thrilling conclusion. Heh. Though I imagine at least 4 more chapters between where I’ve left off and the end of the fic.

[sweeter-innocence-fics]

You Brought Your Worst and I’m Right Here - Chapter Four: Was it just a summer fling?

Pairing: Gale of Waterdeep x female Tav

Work Summary:

After an explosive falling out between Gale and his academic adviser, Mystra, Tav is left to pick up the pieces.

Modern/College AU.

Chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Epilogue

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 1699

Read on AO3.

Masterlists.

Taglist: @mrs-kai-anderson @ang3l1te @missryerye

Taglist info

Previous Chapter

Notes: all the usual warnings, plus arguing/shouting and general mental health stuff

---

A year ago

The chessboard was set. It was a Saturday night in the winter of their third year, all of their friends were out celebrating the end of exams, and Tav and Gale were sitting across from each other, chessboard between them.

Tav hadn’t much liked chess before she met Gale. Even still, he usually won, because she didn’t have the patience to think through every move as carefully as she knew she should.

But she liked playing with Gale. His eyebrows drew together in concentration, and when the games were close, she catch a glimpse of his tongue poking out from between his teeth. It was precious.

She took a sip of her hot chocolate, eyes intent on his face. He didn’t notice. He was far too focused on the game.

They had a longstanding “loser pays for dinner” agreement, but Tav wasn’t worried. Gale never made her pay more than her fair share, even when he should. She knew he came from a pretty well-off family, so it was no skin off his back.

Decisively, he moved a bishop, taking one of her knights. She watched his fingers wrap around the elegantly carved little wooden horse and put it to the side. Her eyes followed the movement of his hands as he wove his fingers together, resting his elbows on the table.

He had strong, dextrous hands. Not for the first time, Tav wondered what it would feel like to interlace her fingers with his.

He cleared his throat, and her eyes darted to his, startled, like she’d been caught. There was an amused expression on his face.

“Your move,” he said, gesturing at the board.

“I know,” she said, voice coming out a little strained. “I’m just… contemplating my options.”

“Of course. By all means.” He sat back in his chair, that smug little smile on his face. If he were anyone else, she would probably want to punch him, but somehow Gale managed to make smug look charming.

She stared back at the board. Her stomach grumbled.

“Hungry?” he said. “We can order now, if you-”

“No, I’m fine.” She was starting to realise that perhaps chess was a bad idea. Her last exam of the semester had been yesterday, and her brain was very tired. Perhaps that explained why she was feeling more impatient than usual.

She took her move, fully aware that there were surely better moves that she hadn’t even considered. Sure enough, in two more turns, Gale was check-mating her. He didn’t even take a moment to bask in his victory like he usually did.

“Now can we order food? I’m famished,” he said. He was grinning at her in a way that made her empty stomach do a little flip.

“Fine. But after dinner, we’re playing Settlers of Catan.” Now that was a game that Tav had a better shot of winning.

“Fine by me.”

*

Now

Tav heard Gale’s voice before she saw him. Her heart leapt into her throat at the sound of the front door closing. He was home.

She strode over to her bedroom door, and then hesitated. Would he even want to see her, after she’d avoided coming to visit? Did she even want to see him?

Distantly, she heard Wyll saying something, and then a laugh. That was good. At least he didn’t sound miserable.

Her hand was resting on the doorknob. Her other hand went to her pocket, pulling out her phone. There were no new messages, but maybe she should check her emails? She scanned through her messaging apps, and the next thing she knew, she was scrolling through twitter.

She perched on her desk chair. She wasn’t fully sitting down; she would get up and go downstairs in a moment. Just as soon as she’d finished reading this thread.

When the knock came at her door, startling her, she realised that it was getting dark in her room. Her lips curled into a frown as she got to her feet and switched the light on. Before she could talk herself out of it, she opened the door.

Gale was standing in the hallway outside of her room. When their eyes met, he smiled at her uneasily. All of the things that Tav should’ve, could’ve, still could say rushed through her mind in a torrent that made it hard to catch hold of any one string of words.

“I love you” and “I’m sorry” and “you scared the ever-loving shit out of me” availed themselves of her, but all felt too crass or too honest. She had to protect her heart, because no one else would.

“Hey,” said Gale. “Tav. It’s good to see you.”

“It’s good to see you too,” she said stiffly. “I’m glad you’re…” Alive. “… okay.”

“Yeah.” There was a pause. Tav was finding that her eyes were happy to settle anywhere but on his face. She fixed her gaze on a painting hanging on the wall behind him. “How are you?”

“Oh, you know. I’m okay. Been busy, you know?” She braced herself. “Sorry I couldn’t come and see you in the hospital. It was… all a bit hectic, with coursework, and stuff, you know?”

Gale swallowed. “Of course. It’s fine. You don’t need to apologise.”

They were both lying, and they both knew it.

“Are you coming down for dinner?” he asked. “Karlach and Lae’zel are both coming over to celebrate my release.”

“Of course. I’ll be down in a minute.”

For the first time, Gale smiled. “I’ll see you downstairs.”

*

It had been four days since Gale had come home, and Tav hadn’t been alone with him since the first evening when he’d come and knocked on her door. She would disappear up to her room as soon as she got home from classes, emerge at mealtimes (Wyll was pretty insistent that they all try to eat dinner together, where possible) and then go back to her room.

Every so often, she could feel Gale’s eyes on her during dinner, but she staunchly avoided his gaze.

And it wasn’t that she wasn’t trying. Sometimes, she would make a concerted effort to make conversation with him, but every word felt stilted and forced.

It didn’t help that she was sleep deprived. She slept fitfully, plagued by nightmares of Gale’s limp body and vomit-stained sheets. It was all she could see whenever she closed her eyes.

She was alone in the kitchen when he cornered her. Her heart plummeted as he walked into the room.

“Tav. Hey,” he said, looking nervous.

“Afternoon,” she said, opening the fridge, just so that she would have somewhere to look.

“Can we talk?”

It took every ounce of her self-control not to visibly blanche. “Sure.” She still wasn’t looking at him.

“Are we… okay? It feels like things have been… weird between us.”

Tav watched as the fridge door gave a little shudder. She couldn’t make sense of what she was seeing, until her eyes traced a path to her trembling hand that was curled, vice-like around the handle of the fridge door. She laughed – wet, throaty – at the absurdity of it, blinking back tears.

“Are we okay?” she repeated, stifling another hysterical laugh. She released the door, letting it fall shut. “Of course we’re not okay, Gale. You tried to kill yourself.”

She turned to look at him, then. His eyes were wide, his mouth slightly open as if he was about to say something, but no words came.

“I thought I’d lost you.” Her shaking hands came up to her face to rub away at the tears that were streaming down her cheeks. “I found you, did you know that? I found your unconscious body and I was scared that you were already dead. I thought I was going to live the rest of my life with you on my conscience because I couldn’t save you.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” he said, so softly that she almost missed it.

“I know that,” she snapped back at him, taken aback by the harshness of her own voice. “And all I could wonder is why you never talked to me. Why you never told me what was going on with you. Why you wouldn’t let me help you. You spent months pushing me away and leaving me to worry what I’d done wrong. And now you wonder why I can barely look at you?” She was almost shouting now. Her voice felt wrong to her own ears. Still, Gale was just staring at her. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself.

“It hurt, Gale,” she said, much quieter now. “You hurt me and scared me and I don’t know how to forgive you, and I feel guilty because I know how hard this must be for you, but that doesn’t make me any less angry.”

“Is everything okay?” Wyll’s voice from the doorway made her jump. He stepped into the kitchen, looking from Gale to Tav and back, concern in his eyes. Astarion followed behind him, although his eyes stayed fixed on Tav.

She swallowed. She looked at Gale. He looked devastated, staring back at her with his big brown puppy dog eyes.

“Tav,” he said, and that made her hackles rise again. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

His apologies hit her like a blow to the chest. He was the one who needed help right now. What was she doing shouting at him and making him feel worse about himself? The last thing he needed was for someone to push him back towards the edge.

A sob shuddered through her and she stepped backwards, her back hitting the fridge. Gale reached for her but she shook her head, and he drew back.

“I don’t want you to apologise,” she said. Her voice sounded high and weak. “I just want you to be okay.”

She couldn’t look at any of them as she walked past them. Her feet carried her back to her bedroom, where she drew the deadbolt across and shut the curtains. In the dark, she stripped off her bra and jeans, leaving her in just a t-shirt and underwear, and then crawled into bed.

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[findingmypeace]

I’ve really been struggling with b/ping. And I hate every second of it. The time, money, and energy (feeling ill the next day) makes me miserable. My b/ping usually happens in the evening. It ends with me not getting into bed until 1-2am. I also have acid reflux and have been taking medication for years. But in the last month I have woken up choking on the food remaining in my stomach despite every effort to get it out. The choking is awful. It feels similar to when food accidentally “goes down the wrong pipe”. I can’t stop coughing. It usually keeps me up for at least 30 mins on top of going to bed around 1-2am. One night it happened 4 times. It’s scary on top of not allowing me to sleep. Thankfully I already had an appointment scheduled with my pcp on Friday so I will ask about it then. It’s awful. And when I’m not actually binging the thought of the food I’ve been binging on makes me nauseous.

So it’s all this misery but I can’t stop. Just recently I started working with a recovery coach and hopefully I will be starting Equip next week (Feb. 5th). I hate wasting my money and I hate not getting sleep. The choking is terrifying. I have to stop. I am going to start texting my recovery coach at least once a night in an effort to keep myself accountable. I’m also going to try different self-care activities when I’m home in the evenings now instead of the b/ping and dissociation.

I’m not sure where recovery will go from here. I feel like a mess. When I was still in iop I was told I might step up to PHP if things don’t change. But things have declined even more since discharge. I’m just worried Equip won’t let me stay. I’m really trying to turn things around.

[bbcphile]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers!

Tagged by @prosopopeya!!!! (thanks for the tag! Also, hi!!)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

15, which is actually more than I had thought I’d written.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

200,778

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I have three fics in the works for Mysterious Lotus Casebook, so that’s where I’m spending my time now, but almost all of my AO3 fic is for the Horatio Hornblower miniseries. (I also wrote a very very metafictional Galavant fic for Yuletide.)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Harboured and Encompassed (novel length modern AU with actor!Archie, librarian!Horatio; Archie/Horatio and Horatio/Archie/Will pre-slash)

Nunc Atque Semper (canon-era DKU (dead Kennedy Universe), past Archie/Horatio, Maria/Horatio; Maria finds out just who Archie Kennedy was to Horatio.)

Much Ado about Shakespeare: Love’s Labour’s Won (canon-era Archie/Horatio; Napoleonic era theater kid Archie speaks entirely in Shakespeare quotations and ends up in a relationship instead of being thrown overboard)

Holding Fast (Modern AU, sequel to H&E, Archie/Horatio/Will; Will has a nightmare. Archie and Horatio help.)

The Vital Importance of Doing Research (Modern AU, sequel to H&E, Archie/Horatio/Will; Archie’s trailer is out, so the trio turn to AO3. AKA. a parodic love letter to fanfic and the fandom)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I tried, I really did, but then I fell horribly behind when my health tanked, and I didn’t catch up, and now I’m just embarrassed about how many years it’s been. But I’m going to try to get back to it, so, if any of you are still following me here, thank you for your comments!! This incredibly anxious writer is extremely grateful to you! And I’ll try to figure out how to articulate that sufficiently soon! <3 

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Without a doubt, “Nunc Atque Semper.” I once swore I’d never write a DKU, and I almost never read them because they emotionally destroy me, but 1. I got a really excellent prompt for it, and 2. I was (and still am) so very mad at Horatio for his behavior toward Maria in the final two films, and this fic was my way of exploring his grief, how much he had changed because of it, and also holding him accountable because Maria deserved so much better. It’s one of the fics I’m proudest of, and one of the hardest to write, emotionally, and while by the end, they understand each other better and he will try to treat her better, they’re both still going to be miserable.  (Turning Over the Sands of Time and Taking Hands Against a Sea of Troubles are probably the next angstiest ones, since they both acknowledge that things are Very Much Not Ok, but at least everyone is alive at the time.)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmmm . . .  I’m not sure how to choose, because a bunch of them have lots of different flavors of happiness. Harboured and Encompassed ends on a loving/comforting/optimistic note (even though there’s still a lot of trauma recovery ahead of Archie), The Best is Yet to Come is sweet/fluffy/romantic, Holding Fast is comforting/snuggly/a little goofy right at the end, The Vital Importance of Doing Research is funny/bubbly/crackfic taken seriously. So, I guess it depends on what your favorite mood is to go with your happiness?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not that anyone’s posted in the comments, at least. Before I started posting Harboured and Encompassed, I saw some people hating on modern Hornblower AUs and the people who write them, but none of them proceeded to insult me in the comments of my fics, so if it continued elsewhere, I am blissfully unaware of it.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

For fics I’ve published on AO3, the closest I’ve come is in The Vital Importance of Doing Research, when the trio read fic for Archie’s film, and I am still laughing about getting to use the tag “boat porn.” In Harboured and Encompassed, Archie and Horatio make out a number of times but don’t actually have sex (because the fic is about different sorts of intimacy and was in part a response to the magical healing cock trope). I’ve planned sex scenes in the MLC fics I’m currently writing, so, we’ll see. 

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Not really, but in the incredibly crackfic-y The HMS Afterlife: Loyalty Edition, Zuko from ATLA makes a cameo. :)  

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes!! Lt_vanStein started translating Harboured and Encompassed into Russian! I’m still so happy about this!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Lol. So, @fionatlux and I cowrote The HMS Afterlife: Loyalty Edition, which is essentially shitposting in play formatting with the characters as ghosts commenting on the events of the movie as a way of actually making ourselves watch the first film without Archie. It is absurd and ridiculous, and full of snark and Shakespeare quotations and angst and crackfic-y enough that Zuko from ATLA even makes an appearance. 

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Well, Archie/Horatio have been going strong since 1998 for me, so it’s probably hard to beat that. But I also love Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji, and recently my entire brain has been devoured by Di Feisheng/Li Lianhua (although I am also very much here for Di Feisheng/Li Lianhua/Fang Duobing).

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I had a very long sequel planned for Harboured and Encompassed in which the OT3 officially gets together (set between parts 3 and 4 of the series), and had written about 50k of it, but then personal drama related to the fic happened (long story), my health unrelatedly tanked, my life fully exploded, and I was too sick to even think about writing for most of the last 4+ years. Thanks to a successful neurosurgery earlier this year, I’m finally starting to regain some energy for creative pursuits, instead of using it all on staying alive despite the efforts of a broken medical system! But on a good day, I’m still only operating at about 30% of my previous capacity, so right now, I’m writing new stuff for Mysterious Lotus Casebook because that’s what the brain gremlins want (*gasp * what, me, invested in a show about someone whose health tanked and they had to build a new life? And that also has PTSD representation? Hell yes.), and hopefully, eventually, I will be able to finish that sequel, assuming there’s anyone still around by then who wants to read it. But I’m listing it here to take the pressure off myself so I don’t feel like I have to write it, because I’m tired of feeling guilty about it all the time.  

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, interior monologue, altering the writing style to fit the character, character development, representations of trauma/trauma recovery/mental health issues, humor, h/c, writing characters finally learning to communicate

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Describing settings, writing in scene when it could be summary instead, writing action scenes, and having confidence

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

There’s some French in The Vital Importance of Doing Research, but I think that’s it. One issue I’m running into with MLC, though, is that there are times where I absolutely know what I’d want the characters to say in Mandarin, but the English equivalent just doesn’t land in the same way. Ah well. 

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Sherlock. 

20. Favorite fic you've written?

I don’t know how to choose. I think Nunc Atque Semper is maybe the one I’m proudest of because of how hard it was (emotionally) to write. Harboured and Encompassed has my all-time favorite scenes/chapters in it, and I am really proud of the character development overall. I’m also still very very proud of just how many Shakespeare lines I was able to fit into Much Ado about Shakespeare: Love’s Labour’s Won, which probably had more research that went into it than any other fic I’ve written. I think the most underappreciated fic I’ve written is Taking Hands Against a Sea of Troubles–I was really proud of the research that went into it, the imitation of 1800s writing and speech, the significance of the play they see, and the non-verbal communication and comfort at the end–and I’m really surprised that Holding Fast has more kudos.  

If you write fic, consider yourself invited to respond (but no worries if doing this sort of thing stresses you out). I’m specifically tagging some of my newer mutuals, because I really want to get to know you better! (And if I forgot to include you, it's not personal!)

@thesilversun @nutcasewithaknife @shamera @extraordinarilyextreme @slangerogkatter @enbysaurus-rex @willowcatkinblossom @kingsandbastardz @the-wintry-mizzenmast

[bettsfic]

2022 in writing

whoops, i wrote this at the end of december, put it in my drafts, and forgot about it. this is my seventh year writing a recap and i just read through all of them again. part of me thinks, "it's been 7 years and i haven't accomplished a fraction of what other writers have in that same time." but then the other part of me remembers 1) other writers are on their own path and working at their own speed, and 2) it's unfathomable to me how utterly mentally fucked i used to be. and i mean, i'm still mentally fucked but at least i'm working on getting better. the point is, i had a different starting line than others.

anyway, it's a new year and that means it's time to think to myself for the 7th year running, "dear god when am i going to publish a book." every year i think, this is going to be my year! every year it isn't.

overcame the worst writers' block i've ever had

"overcame" is making it sound more dramatic than it was. i went on a medication that fucked with my brain and then went back off it. but i worry that when i think back on 2022, i'm not going to remember all this cool stuff i did, i'm going to remember how utterly miserable i was for six months. how terrifying it was to feel like someone else was living in my body. i wrote a little bit about it in october's newsletter.

some of this post i've copied over from my newsletter.

but also i have to acknowledge that when i came back to writing, it felt like my brain had been totally rewired and i feel capable, creatively, of about 10x more than i used to be capable of. i'm still trying to articulate what changed and why.

published some things

“shut up and kill me” -- featured in issue 41 of Barren Magazine. the editor who chose it said it was his favorite of the 700+ submissions they received. very happy this weird story has found its home. please heed the warnings!

“coping skills” -- featured in issue 1 of Flossy Lit Mag, a magazine my friends started and which has some great work in it already.

("not if, when" was published january of this year, so it'll go in next year's update)

published other people's things

in 2022, ofic magazine published 33 prose pieces and 3 art pieces! over half of what we accepted came from not yet published authors and you have no idea how happy that makes me.

won a grant

i’m very very excited to say i won the Barbara Deming Memorial Fund grant to help offset the travel expenses of the residency i attended! i’ve been applying to this for years and it’s amazing to have been awarded it. the judges had a lot of lovely things to say about my work and it was a big confidence boost.

did a residency

i spent a month in beautiful Wyoming at the Jentel Arts residency. i met some wonderful artists, got a lot of work done, and had an amazing time. definitely the highlight of my year.

made the top 10 of a big contest

i submitted "Not If, When" to a screenwriting website hosting a prose contest, and out of what seemed to be a lot of submissions, i was a top 10 finalist, and now my story is being pitched to production studios to see if they want to buy the film/tv rights. i've also had a few phone calls with hollywood people wanting to talk to me about my work (i'm still confused about that) and i think they've gone well. no idea what the endgame is here though.

ran other workshop

i intended to run two fanauthor workshops but i only managed one, because of the whole "just gritting my teeth trying to stay alive" thing. but the one i ran i think went really well!

coaching/editing is my job now

i didn't think too much of that until i met with my thesis advisor to get caught up and she was like, wow that's the dream. and she invited me to be a panelist for the annual publishing symposium at my alma mater.

i'm not getting rich or anything, but i've picked up enough commercial copywriting work to make ends meet.

applied/submitted to a few places

totals:

11 residencies (8 rejections, 2 rejections with encouraging feedback, 1 acceptance)

4 publications (1 encouraging rejection, 3 acceptances)

1 award (1 acceptance)

2 screenwriting-ish contests (1 rejection, 1 finalist placement)

this has been far and away my most successful submission year. 6 major wins!

wrote 421k words

what's extra wild about this word count is that ~400k of it was across 6 months. from january 1 to june 16, i wrote only 22k words. and then from june 17 to december 31, i wrote the rest. and for the finished works, this doesn't include their respective trash docs (where i put everything i cut from a story). if i add in those, it's an additional ~90k.

year over year word count comparison:

2022: 421k

2021: 183k

2020: 375k

2019: 430k

2018: 450k

2017: 150k

2016: 343k

2015: 250k

2014: 311k

nine year total: 2,913,000

& other stuff

i really advocated for my mental health this year and i'm super proud of that. i mean dealing with my brain was basically a full-time job and i've come to accept i'll be spending my entire life micromanaging my own head, but for now things are okay

unfortunately i got a diagnosis that wasn't what i expected, that seems mostly correct, and which i'm having trouble accepting

i moved into an apartment with my best friend and it's going really well so far

the only travel i did was to missouri to visit family, and to wyoming for my residency

2022 goal recap (from 2021)

sell a book any book dear god -- got close, but nope

finish a draft of a new novel -- big nope

get an apartment -- yep! and it's great

publish 3 issues of OFIC -- yes and i'm very proud of them

publish 12 newsletters -- no, published 5 newsletters

register OFIC Press as a nonprofit -- not yet, working on it (this is far more difficult than i thought it would be)

run a successful Fanauthor Workshop -- yep! 2 sessions out of my goal of 4

write a proposal for a fanfiction craft book -- no, but i talked to my agent about it and now we're working on it together

write a script (pilot or feature) and submit to contests -- yes but it was Bad and i've gotta, you know, make it not bad

2023 goals

these are going to be remarkably similar to last year's, considering it's all just stuff that's been set in motion.

SELL A BOOK

finish a new novel (it's february and i've already kind of done this, but still putting it on here)

publish 4 issues of ofic mag

publish at least 6 newsletters

build the 2024 ofic press catalogue

apply for nonprofit status

run 4 workshop sessions

submit nonfiction proposal

build a script portfolio (feature, pilot, spec)

find a healthy balance between writing and living

annual thank you!

despite how badly i derailed for the first half of the year, i'm really grateful to fandom, readers, and all the friends i've made here for your support and encouragement, without which i wouldn't have been able to do any of this.

prior year recaps: 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021

[wreywrites]

Tiger Shark

Part 4: The Anchor

Chapter 24

“That sounds fake.” I stare at the mandatory broadcast.

Next to me, Finnick nods. “But it’s not. They wouldn’t lie about something like that.” And then he taps, Not natural causes though.

The next morning, the Victors from Four board the train to the Capitol. We spend the night in the Victor Center, and the next afternoon, the fifty-six living victors dress in black and walk down Victor’s Way behind the casket drawn by four black horses. And then we sit, on live TV, through Megary Fallon’s funeral.

President Snow speaks first, then Megary’s mentor Raela, then Carver from Seven, and finally Augustus. He looks terrible. He talks about her indomitable spirit and how Megary wouldn’t want us to waste our lives mourning, but to live instead for her, to the fullest.

And then we all go back to the Victor Center, where we sit around the atrium in silence. I suspect more people than Finnick and I don’t believe the story about Megary’s death. And this is confirmed when Gloss sits down next to me.

“Is this what happens when it plays out?” I ask quietly.

He nods. “It didn’t matter what they threatened her with. It never has. I guess this was the easiest solution.”

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

Megary’s death rattles all of Panem. She was popular. Even in the districts, and not just her home in Nine, people wear black. Things are quiet everywhere. When we get home, Finnick sits at the kitchen table for hours without moving. I go to the pier.

The Seventy-Second Hunger Games, only a month after Megary’s death, are almost subdued. I remember other Victors dying before, but they’ve always been old and their deaths almost expected. Megary was my age.

Beck is chosen to be a mentor, which gives me the mistaken impression that I will at least be able to spend some time with Finnick while we are in the Capitol.

“It’ll be… fun,” I say when he tells me. We are swimming by the Traps, enjoying a hot summer afternoon.

“Mmmm.”

“What? Would you rather be a mentor?”

He shrugs. “If they don’t have me mentoring, it just means they’re keeping my schedule full of other things. So yes, I think I’d rather be a mentor. I’m glad they’re letting you off another year though.”

I shrug. “Beck told me the other day they asked him how I was. He said unreliable at best.”

Finnick nods. “It’s true. And it’s keeping you off the list.”

It is. It’s also still making my life miserable, but it’s keeping me off the list. Small victories.

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

Augustus and I watch the girl from One win. We are quiet this year. Neither of us talks about Megary, except on the first day we see each other, when I give him a hug and tell him how sorry I am, and he says that it’s his fault. We adopt Johanna into our tiny group. Even she is quiet. I think Megary’s death got to her. Johanna might not have anyone else the Capitol can threaten, but they can still kill her. The Victory Banquet is full of Capitol socialites milling around awkwardly, their arms looking empty without a laughing Megary on them. And then the Games are over, and we go home for another year.

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

Coral graduates from the teacher training program, but has to move down the coast for her assigned position. After we say our goodbyes, I lock myself in one of the spare bedrooms and break down. I cry until I have no more tears, and in the silence that follows I fade into memories of the arena, playing on a loop, over and over and over and over.

I come back to the door hanging from broken hinges, Jade sitting in the hallway with her head on her arms, Finnick next to me talking about a ray he saw swimming.

When I look up at him, he looks broken. “Six hours, Annie. Six hours.”

“It’s too much,” I whisper, my voice hoarse and breaking. “They keep taking people away. You know they sent her to the farthest school they could on purpose.”

From the hallway comes a choked sob.

I look at Finnick, desperate for some sort of reassurance, but knowing that I won’t get any. “Who’s next?”

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

“Ooh, my party shirt!” Finnick opens the box, pulling a new sweater out. He has never not been invited to the party in the Capitol at the end of the Victory Tour, and every year, they send him an outfit to wear. He holds the sweater up to his chest. “How’s it look?”

“Like a lot more shirt than they usually have you wearing.”

“Well it is winter, and it gets chilly in the Capitol.” He pulls a smaller box out of the first box. “And this is for you. Happy, uh, birthday.”

I take the box, raising an eyebrow. “Finnick, my birthday was two months ago. We took the boat out and went lobster diving. Mags gave me a new hat. Beck made us supper. You were there for all the festivities.”

“Yes, I was, your dad bought a cake and it was delicious. I just don’t have any other thing to wish you ‘happy’ about.”

I open the box. There’s a folded piece of paper that says Hope this helps, B. Underneath is something that I assume is a radio, but small enough to fit in a pocket. There are four unlabeled buttons, but the back side of the piece of paper says back 20 sec-play-stop-forward 20 sec. Under the radio, in an even smaller box, are about a dozen holochips—flat, inch-square digital storage devices—labeled in numerical order.

“Who’s B?” I re-examine the note, hoping for a clue that I missed the first time around.

“A friend,” Finnick says. “I told him about how you have trouble with things being too quiet, and he had an idea. Been working on it quite a while. Make sure you start with One.”

“Obviously.” I put the chip labeled “1” in the little slot, but before I can push play, Finnick interrupts.

“Not now, wait until you need it!”

“Alright, I was just excited for my new toy.”

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

Despite Augustus and Johanna’s best efforts, it is during the Seventy-Third Hunger Games that I finally draw attention to myself. We are watching the eighth day, with a dozen tributes left, when one of them beheads another.

I wake up in my room in the Victor Center, curled up with my hands over my ears, surrounded by doctors.

“Make them stop,” I beg. “Please, just make them stop!”

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

I do not attend the Seventy-Fourth Hunger Games. I get a phone call a week before the reaping saying my presence is requested for the reaping and nothing else. When I tell Finnick this, he just nods and says, “I know.”

Jade moves in with me while Finnick is mentoring our poor twelve-year-old tributes. “Finnick told me to tell you that you can use the radio now.” She drags her suitcase into the second spare bedroom. “Apparently he doesn’t trust me to talk you to sleep.”

I almost laugh. “You’re not as good at it as he is.”

“I’m going to take that as a compliment. Clearly, my stories are more exciting than his.”

“They are,” I smile. “And I was there for most of them.”

After Jade gets unpacked neither of us know quite what to do, so we decide to watch every minute of Hunger Games coverage. We watch the reaping replay over and over, interspersed with highlights from past Games. A girl from Twelve volunteers. I don’t think that’s ever happened before. Johanna goes on a two-minute slaughtering rampage. The boy from Eleven looks like Zalea. I remember she had a brother and wonder if it’s him. When they show his mother and grandmother, I know it is. Megary buries an axe in one of the Careers, leaving only three other tributes between her and victory. The boy from Two smiles when they draw his name. Gloss whips a knife through the air and kills his target from thirty yards. The girl from Three sobs as she walks to the stage. I hurl a spear into Farroe. And then I black out.

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

“…better at this. Umm, remember when we used to have breath-holding contests? You were always so good. The day I almost drowned, when you saved me? I was practicing holding my breath and it went too far. I’m so glad you were there. I’ve always been so glad you were my friend, and I need you to come back so you can keep being my friend.”

“I’ll try,” I rasp.

“Oh good,” Jade lets out a sigh. “I was starting to think I couldn’t get you to come back. And that would have been embarrassing.” She gets up and gets a blanket, then wraps it around me. “I’m going to make some coffee. Want anything?”

I shake my head. “Did I miss the Parade?”

“No, we’ve got another half hour or so. They’ve been showing the full reel of last year to get everyone properly hyped up.” She disappears into the kitchen, then returns with a cup of coffee and a plate of cookies. “I know you said you didn’t want anything, but I’m very good at ignoring you.”

We spend the next half hour debating what aquatic costume Marius and Dalia will put the kids from Four in this year.

“Dalia’s much more reasonable. If she was in charge, we’d have costumes we could at least walk in. But instead Marius gets the final say, and I was a mermaid who had to be carried everywhere.”

“You looked good though,” Jade says. “Not like the year they were dressed as actual fish.”

“I felt so bad for them.”

“How long before he brings the nets back?”

“Never, I hope, but I guess we’ll see. I think if he was going to, he would have done it with Mako and me.”

“True. It’s kind of crossing a line with twelve-year-olds. And you two would have looked good.”

“Thank you?”

“Yeah, it was a compliment.”

It turns out the tributes from Four are dressed like coral growths. They look ridiculous. It almost makes me thankful that I was a mermaid. But I don’t focus on them for long because the tributes from Twelve are literally on fire.

“That’s just not fair,” Jade says. “Now I’m not going to remember anyone else.”

“I’ll bet that was the point. No one’s going to forget her now, not after she volunteered like that.”

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

When I go to bed, I set the little radio on my nightstand, insert Chip 1, and hit play.

Hey honey, Finnick’s voice says, I want you to know that I’m going back on that deal. I will absolutely call you honey all the time in these recordings because I think it’s hilarious how much you hate it and you can’t do anything about it. And now I’m going to tell you about the time I lost an epic battle to a clownfish.

And he does. I fall asleep halfway through, and when I wake up the next morning, the recording is silent. More curious than anything, I push play. The story of the clownfish continues, but it’s definitely ahead of where I fell asleep. I push the “Back 20 sec” button seven or eight times before I hit the last part I remember hearing. I wonder how it knew to pause. Now I really want to find out who B is.

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

That afternoon, they play the highlight reel of my Games.

Jade watches, a sad smile on her face. “I’d almost forgotten what Mako’s laugh sounded like.”

I haven’t. I hear it all the time, echoing through my wayward mind, always followed by the sound of a steel beheading.

~~~                               ~~~                               ~~~

When the boy from Twelve professes his love for the girl, I scream at the TV. “Why? Why would you do that? Don’t you know what happens?”

And then they are in the arena, and against all odds, those two from Twelve stay alive. Through tracker jackers, alliances, explosions, they are alive. And then Claudius Templesmith announces that they have changed the rules and will crown two victors if they are from the same district.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Jade looking at me, waiting to see how I will react. But I do not react. I don’t trust the Capitol. There can only be one victor. Why would they be willing to change their precious rules now when just two years ago they killed one of their most beloved victors just because she wouldn’t play by the rules?

And I am right. Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark are the last two alive, and the Capitol reneges.

“Oh no. I can’t watch another Ten,” Jade hides her face behind her fingers as the pair talk so quietly the cameras don’t pick it up.

But I see what they are doing. “No, Jade, look, they’re going to…”

I don’t finish the sentence. We stare at the screen, watching them each raise a handful of berries to their mouths. Now the Capitol will have no victors.

But there is no cannon. Instead, the slightly-panicked voice of Claudius Templesmith announces the victors of the Seventy-Fourth Hunger Games.

****

****

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Tag List:

@avoxrising @snow-dragon-rider @anakins-ride-or-die

[klaudia2646]

This last weekend, starting on Friday I volunteered at the free dental clinic, IMOM (Iowa Mission of Mercy). I worked a split shift on Thursday and Friday I worked until 10:30 so I could go home and let the dogs out. David had been in Dubuque at a conference and was arriving home later in the day.

Unfortunately it had been raining a lot, it was miserable, we do need the rain so I was happy it was raining but by the time I got inside the convention center where they were hosting the program, I was soaked and I had a raincoat and hat. My feet were completely soaked. And here I was complaining about it until I talked to some of the people who I was interpreting for, they got there at 4 or 5 in the morning, many of them drove for an hour or longer, had to wait in line while it was raining and cold. Then, they had to be inside waiting and got done between 4 and 5 and maybe 6 in the evening. At least Saturday wasn’t raining. But I tell you, it was a rewarding thing to do but it breaks my heart to see so many people to go through so much just to get some dental work. Sad. And I’m thankful for the dental professionals who donated their time, they saw so many people, and with so many foreigners I know there were some things lost in translation because sometimes we weren’t around possibly because we were helping someone else.

Friday I was exhausted and my feet hurt. I was in bed sleeping before 9pm. Saturday I was only supposed to go from noon until 5:30 but I went earlier in the morning and left a bit before 5:30 but by then they didn’t have many Spanish people anymore and there were others who spoke the language. I did wear sneakers instead of Toms shoes, I mean, Toms are good until you have to be on your feet for long hours walking on concrete.

Next year they’ll host it in Sioux City so I guess I will not be volunteering, it’s too far away.

[emgoesmed]

Thank you! ☺️ sorry because this is gonna be looooong. for reference, I go to a decently known MD school but we are broken up into cohorts and my cohort is pretty small. Idk what I want to do but I know I do NOT want to do surgery. I like stuff like rheum and ID, but I LOVE caring for people across all age ranges and I don’t like the idea of spending 3 years doing IM just to be able to APPLY to do what I actually want to do. I love derm, but ooof competitive. I love neuro and psych. And I loooove the idea of rural, like being THE only doc in a frontier county sounds so cool to me. But yeah, surg sounds miserable.

Also. I worked for years, full time, in a hospital and an independent clinic before. I felt so fulfilled with patients and helping them out even when there was nothing we could do, even when I would come home crying after seeing a pt who just got a hard diagnosis, and that is a huge reason I went into medicine- I love the science part of it and also want to do the patient side of things. I may be introverted but I REALLY value human connection too. For me, knowledge alone is exciting but it feels empty if it’s not being used to help others.

None of that has changed since starting school, not at all, but I’m honestly the most miserable I have been. I full on sob at least once more than 70% of the days. I’m not sad, I don’t feel depressed, no changes to appetite or sleep or focus or anything like that, I still enjoy doing things I enjoy, and I LOVE learning the material… but I think I’m socially burnt out. And the stress of that on my body? I’m getting sick so frequently now too. Even getting stupid skin infections more because and I think it’s because im so stressed (we haven’t seen patients yet so it’s not like, getting sick from them).

I’m introverted, and I swear I’m one of the most introverted introverts because nobody else in my class seems to have this issue. Our classes are required and usually very interactive with lots of TBLs instead of traditional lecture, and we are all in one room for hours. My classmates are good people but they are SO LOUD and chatty. Even the other introverts are participating in this. I leave feeling SO socially drained that though I WANT to be with my spouse when I’m home and talk to him about his day, I just keep drawing on nothing and end up crying more because I just have no more social to give.

Even when I spend all my spare time alone doing things I like, I still can’t recharge enough. Each day is progressively worse and I feel totally shut down by Friday. The weekend barely gives me enough time to recharge and it’s just enough to do it all over again.

I WANT to be able to do things outside of classes. I have the time- really at this point I don’t need to study a lot- but I don’t have the social energy. People know I don’t go to events and get togethers, and while I will thank them for the invite and tell them I’m a major introvert and feeling too drained, and while my classmates are good people, it’s still hard to form actual friendship when I can’t do anything. And I want to be involved in interest groups and stuff like that, but I know I couldn’t handle it since I’m barely able to handle the socializing in class.

So now I’m just confused. When I try to ask people for advice they all tell me I need to learn how to be more social and “get over it” and they tell me that medicine and clinic and being a provider is so social and if I can’t easily handle 4-8 hours of my classmates, then all I can really do medicine wise is pathology or radiology. Neither of those appeals to me.

And yeah now I’m wondering if all of this was a mistake. Even if I could make my own clinic or practice “fit” my introversion like the hospital + clinic I worked in before, I’m absolutely petrified that I’ll have to deal with all of this over-socialization and drained battery for not just the next 3.5 years but then 3+ years of residency after that. I don’t know I can SURVIVE that if this is what it’ll be like. And if I only “can” go into path or rads, I don’t think I’ll be actually fulfilled in practice either.

Hi anon!

Sounds like you've been going through a lot. I'll throw in my 2 cents, for whatever it's worth.

In my humble opinion, it's important to recognize that socializing with your classmates is not the same as talking to and caring for patients.

It sounds like you are passionate about medicine and clinical care and enjoyed your previous clinical experience. I wouldn't let this experience discourage you from exploring those interests. Is there the opportunity for you to do any shadowing or participating in a student-run clinic or something at your school?

Personally, I enjoy talking to 95% of patients more than I like socializing with a good chunk of my classmates. They're not bad people, but it's a different kind of interaction and a different type of energy requirement.

Lastly, food for thought--are you sure your feelings of exhaustion and feeling overwhelmed are all due to socializing with classmates? Definitely worth thinking about anything else that might be contributing, it really does seem like you are having trouble a significant amount of the time. Is there anyone else or other resources at your school that you can talk to?

Of course, feel free to reach out if you have any other questions, I'm always happy to listen. <3

[percontaion-points]

Elizabeth and the Clan of Dragons chapter 1

Click to see the rest of the snark & image descriptions

Click here for the rest of the series!

Chapter 1

One of them had long beautiful golden-red fur, the kind you just wanted to run your fingers through. But, not once did I reach out even just for a simple caress. I didn’t dare. This was the wolf who wanted to kill me. 

Why would you start off with “I wanted to run my fingers through his fur. BUT I DIDN’T. BECAUSE HE WANTED TO MURDER ME.” 

You could have literally not written this, but you did. 

I took a sip from my delicate porcelain teacup and blanched as it went down my throat; it was now tepid.

I’m starting to get a sense of what kind of series this is going to be now.

I’m still on page one.

Yep, that’s right. The moon chose me. Fated Alpha of the whole friggin pack. 

I was wondering if this was an actual ABO story… And I was right. 

And it must seriously be having an outright belly laugh because the problem was, I couldn’t shift. 

I’ve never read this specific book before, but I swear that these ABO stories are all the fucking same after a while. 

I considered taking my clothes off just to piss Aaron off because he still hadn’t moved. Of course, shifter wolves were used to being naked around each other. But Aaron still got flustered when I was naked around the pack because I never had a reason to be. Naked that is.

Again, you didn’t have to write it like this, yet you did. 

People thought it was because of the long scar that ran from his eye to the bottom of his jaw but the real reason I called him that was because I knew deep inside that he would really kill me if he ever had the chance, just like Scar killed his King in Lion King.

Are we seriously going here right now?

Also, his name was freaking Mufasa. JFC how hard is it to look something up? 

All of the leaders were going to vote on whether or not they would pick a new Fated Alpha if I didn’t come into my shifter powers by the time I was twenty-five: only one year and two hours away. 

The only consolation prize for this miserable novel (I’m literally on page 4) is that at least she’s not barely legal. 

I pushed the magical button on the wall that switched the tint [on the window] from ��day’ to ‘night.’ Okay not really magical but it was science and math or something, so it was magical to me.

That’s a lot of words for “I’m not the brightest bulb.”

A warm glow washed through my body; every nerve in my body called for him. I was strung so tight and needed the release that only he could give me. 

“Aaron, please. I need you. I’m worried about tomorrow.” This wasn’t one of my white lies.

In times past, I wouldn’t have had to beg. But things were changing and now he wasn’t always willing to play along with my antics.

It kind of seems to me like it would be in everybody’s best interest to simply marry Lizzy and Aaron to each other. Lizzy can be the “luna” (or whatever this series calls the female mate of the alpha), and Aaron can be in charge. 

I wasn’t allowed to pick a mate until I could shift and sexual relationships with other potential alphas was strictly forbidden.

Ah, okay. I’m down with the forbidden love aspect.

But I still think that marrying Lizz to Aaron would be a win-win situation for everybody involved. 

“But we haven’t celebrated my birthday like this in a few years.” 

“I know, but your mom and I decided to throw you one last big one. We have a feeling it’s going to be a special one.”

Let me guess: she’s going to come into her powers, and end up with her reverse harem of fated mates? 

Noting that the alarm hadn’t been turned on yet, I opened the back door and slipped out into the cool night.

Chapter 1 summary: Meet Elizabeth, 24 years old, and next in line to be the alpha of a pack of werewolves. …Except that she can’t shift, and the rest of the pack are seriously doubting her ability to lead them in the future. Her father comes in and tells her that another wolf, nicknamed Scarface, and the father of Lizzy’s secret boyfriend, Aaron, are coming over so that dad can convince Scarface to vote to keep Liz on as alpha. 

A few minutes into the meeting, Aaron makes a paper-thin excuse to leave with Lizzy. In the bathroom, the two of them start getting hot and heavy. But before anything can happen, their fathers come looking for them. Their relationship is a little forbidden, thanks to the fact that Lizzy can’t shift. When Lizzy goes back, Scarface chews her out for “not being at her own meeting”. He hates her, and wants her out of power so that Aaron can be in charge instead. Which I’m pretty sure is more about birth order rather than Liz’s weakness, but that’s not important. 

Liz is going to have a huge blow-out birthday party from her parents in the morning, so dad tells her to go get some sleep. But instead of doing that, she texts Aaron, who tells her that he’s outside, and she should sneak out as well. So she goes. 

[ham-n-spam]

Y’know it’s been a while since I wrote a proper angst post…

I’m not gonna start something heavy tonight, but man sometimes I hate being autistic. Now, I know there’s nothing wrong with me. I know that autism isn’t a disease or illness or whatever. But being raised in a neurotypical world as an autistic woman fucking sucks.

Like I grew up being told that I had to be polite. Add anxiety to the mix and you’ve got a damn near perfectly behave little girl who would have an aneurysm if she said anything that could be considered insulting. I was well mannered and heavily masked throughout my childhood… except when it came to my special interests.

For some reason, I never tried to mask the fact that I loved Pokémon and Animal Crossing and Time Travel an unhealthy amount. I just expressed my love for my hyperfixations and moved on. Of course, as I got older I understood that it was ‘frowned upon’ for teenagers to still like ‘childish’ things, but it didn’t stop me from loving the shit in my free time.

But being autistic in a neurotypical world sucks ass. Because my closest friends (who also happen to be autistic) still called my interest cringey because that’s how we’re taught to view that kind of stuff. I get regularly teased by my mum’s bitch of a partner for still liking Barbie and Hello Kitty.

And it’s not just how people treat me for my interests, it’s how I treat myself. Remember that mild mannered little girl who never set a foot out of line? Now she feels like a burden for seeking comfort after a meltdown because it would mean bothering people. Like just now, prior to this little rant I had a good old cry because I hate the house I currently live in and am terrified of spending the next 4 years of my life here.

It’s rare for autistics to live independently you see. And whilst I’m not gonna spill the exact details of my home life because of stranger danger, the gist is that I have a tiny ass room and that my mum’s partner is the biggest bitch on the planet who loves making me miserable.

I miss my old house. I wish my mum was around more. I hate how I think myself a burden because I have human needs. And most of all, I’m upset that I isolate myself from the family I actually care about. I wanna go back to my old home, to where I lived before I moved a couple years ago. At least there I had good memories.

This kind of developed into an angst rant didn’t it? I don’t care, I’m tired, hormonal, and am too overstimulated to really care. I think I’m gonna go ask my mum for a hug because I really do feel like shit right now.

Spam account go brrr.

[spiteless-xo]

Gamer anon here :)

I have a PS4, Nintendo Switch and a newly-built PC that has been collecting dust. I’m about to start Cyberpunk 2077 any day now though! Starfield is coming out in a few days but I have so many games on my to-play list and general life duties so I might wait til next year. 😅

In no particular order (the first 2 are PS4 games but you can find them either on PC or the Switch):

• Yakuza: Like A Dragon, probably one of my favourites I’ve played in the last 5 years. It’s cinematic, very weird and goofy but has a lot of heart. I loved it so much I’m working my way backwards. Currently on Yakuza 0, it has the same vibes and I’m loving it so far.

• Persona 4 & 5, but I’d suggest starting with P5 Royal. I love this series because it combines my love of strategic RPGs and anime. There is a complete remake of P3 coming out in February and I’m so excited for that.

* Fire Emblem Three Houses was my first Switch game, my profile says I clocked in around 200 hours on it since last December. 🫣 Lots of great characters, an amazing story and different routes so you have at least 3-4 unique playthroughs to enjoy.

If you do check these out then I’d recommend the English dubbing but they’re all great regardless of what your choice is. They’re turn-based JRPGs so there is a learning curve to them. The Witcher 3 is more action-oriented in comparison so I’d add that to the list as well.

Sorry, this message has gotten so long. ;_; There’s probably more I’m missing so I’ll send another ask in the future. Let me know what you like about BG3! I might check it out, it reminds me a lot of the Dragon Age series.

i’ve heard so many good things about the yakuza series!! i’ll have to check it out!

i played persona 5 for the ps3 during covid and i actually had a hard time getting into it because of the combat. i really loved the story and talking with all of the characters but i HATED having to go through the dungeons and fight the bad guys 💀 maybe i’m just bad at it idk

i LOVED fire emblem three houses!!! my bf is really into the fire emblem series and he got it for his birthday when it first came out and i watched him play for a bit before i got into it myself. i’ve done the edelgaurd route and the claude route but i’ve never done dimitri’s.

i also watched my bf play fire emblem engage and i liked that but i haven’t played it myself.

i tried playing the witcher on pc but i got so overwhelmed with all of the different controls so i gave up. i’ve been told it’s easier with a controller but i had such a miserable time that i’m hesitant to go back lol maybe i’m not cut out for those real-time combat games.

bg3 is a lot of a fun so far!! it’s got lot of roleplay elements and it really makes you feel like your choices matter. it reminds me of the fallout series in that sense.

character customization is not great but you can download mods if you’re playing on pc to help with that.

i like the turn-based combat as well but i get annoyed with spellcasters because i don’t have the patience to learn/look through all the spells lmao i pretty much just spam firebolt w my spellcasters and maybe do something fun if i see a cluster of baddies.

i play tabletop d&d too actually! i was a barbarian in my first campaign, rogue in my second, and now i’m playing a sorcerer.

[5tar9litter]

Things my mom said multiple times:

Partying:

“I don’t know why I don’t like it. I should like drinking and gambling. I should like talking to those thai girls even if they are hella rude. I should leave all of my kids alone at home while I go party past 12 at midnight. I guess I’m just weird like what they said. I don’t like talking to those people. They are so annoying, always boasting about how much money they make and then wasting it all away in the casino! Why don’t I like them? Why do I hate it so much??”

She’s said this exact topic at least 60 times this year of 2023. And I’d explain it’s because they are horrible ppl and it’s okay to have different hobbies from others. At least you are saving money, avoiding health risks, and just go find better ppl to be with. Plus I am the same way. I hate those ppl with the same passion but I just found better people who doesn't do those type of things.

Then she’d forget what I just said and start the same exact paragraph by next week or month.

And I start to interrupt when she is talking now because it’s annoying having them ask dumb ass questions esp if you just consulted them like 45x’s now. It’s just a waste of time and I noticed I’ve been either telling her she and I already talked about this or changing the subject completely.

Food:

“I wish we ate more sweets. As a family, nobody in this family likes it. I buy so much cookies, sodas, pizzas, apple pies, cakes, and candy but nobody eats all of it?”

I’d explain, “it’s too sweet. And there’s so much too. You buy like 26 apple pies and expect 4 of your kids to eat all of it in a week?? No thanks.”

“But why can’t we be like an american family? Why can’t we just eat all of the sweets like that?”

“But that’s why all of Americans are dying from cardiovascular diseases, Mom. Sweets kill u if you eat a lot, duh. What r u trying to do, kill us?”

“Haha, you are right but look at how good it looks.”

“Gross. It’s too sweet. Why did you buy so much sweets from the store again? You know 19 years of my life, none of us like cakes and stuff like that.”

“*attempts to eat all 26 apple pies by herself and stops eating by the 3rd apple pies* yuck! it’s so sweet! Why can’t I finish all of it?”

“Facepalms**”

SHE DOES THIS ALL THE TIME AHHH. She knows we don't like sweets. Period. Yet she buys it all the time and always complains that we never eat it even though none of us wanted it. If we were like, "Mom can we buy these cupcakes?" then we don't eat all of it. Then that makes sense that she'd be mad. But she's actually encouraging us to eat unhealthy on a daily basis. Like do you know how much pizzas we've had delivered to house on the daily basis? 6 BOXES for 4 KIDS AHHHH

This behavior did start my brother's food addictions though. Because she would encourage us to eat all of this and they would finish all 5 or 6 boxes by themselves. Now my brothers are having heart problems and stomach issues. Bruh.

Family in laws:

"When you date or get married, you are gonna have to sacrifice your whole life to your man's parents. You have to clean and cook for them 24/7. You will become a slave to them. Dating is never fun. It's only miserable"

I just nod my head and act like I'm listening every time she says this.

My job

"You shouldn't go to college and get a job. Just open a business. I'll support you."

She doesn't even have enough money to buy me food. I have to work to pay for it. It's so annoying because my dad told me the same thing but he can't even pay the bills so he's always stressing out.

"You should start a Youtube channel."

I respond with, "No thank you. I hate filming stuff. I don't even post 1 picture on my other social media so what makes you think I wanna?"

"Just saying. It'd be a good start."

"Yeah yeah."

She brings up this same topic of me starting a Youtube channel another 30x.

"Why do you keep telling me this, Mom!?"

Usually, I end up getting really pissed off. I hate when I get mad at anybody including my mom but she has a weird habit of repeating herself.

She really wants me to fucking start a youtube channel. I did start one at some point but then I got busy with school or other things and it was really boring for me so I just stopped. But it annoys me that she doesn't understand that I don't like making youtube videos especially at the moment. In the future, I can see it happening but not now. She still keeps suggesting it.

Another thing that annoys me is that she always tell me that my job sucks.

It took me 6 months to get my job and I love it to death. Even if it's minimal pay: Around 16$/hr where I live.

My coworkers are so nice. My managers are so kind and patient with me. The customers are so good to me and they treat me like family. The job is easy and fun. Sometimes I get yelled at by customers because I work at retail and I need an ID from them in order for them to purchase the cigarettes. 97% of them are pretty compliant. So it's fast and easy and if they argue, my coworkers always back me up. They are so kind compared to my old job where I had no support. So, I am always happy to come to work because for someone in my position and history, especially with a tight schedule, this job is like paradise for me. So every time I have a small issue like customers being an idiot or me being hit on at work which is all the time, my mom would say my job sucks.

I call her out on it because at least I am working and you know, compared to my old job at Petco, it's actually really good for a college student. It's close by and easy and relaxes me even if there's small mishaps.

She says she just meant all of that work for 17/hr. I tell her, "For now, this is what I just gotta work with it. But it doesn't suck. I'm just really grateful I have a job.

Babies:

"Do not have babies when you are young." Valid.

Boyfriends

"No dating until you finish school and get a career."

"

Valid.

"You can only dress like that around your boyfriend when you get one."

"You can only go watch movies or go out with your boyfriend when you get one."

"You can only get a house when you get a boyfriend."

"When you get a boyfriend, you'll have someone to hang out with all the time."

"WHY DO YOU WANT A BOYFRIEND SO MUCH I DONT UNDERSTAND WHAT'S SO GOOD ABOUT HAVING ONE?!!?"

Mom, ever since I was young. You instilled this mindset that I need a boyfriend to have freedom in life. You won't even let me go out without a guy accompanying me and every guy I am just friends with you think I am dating him. AHH WHY IS SHE LIKE THIS?

"OOoh, looks like you are ready for a boyfriend~" My mom would tease me all the time and at the same time she'd tell me, "No boyfriend! You are too young. Not until you are a doctor!"

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Casinos:

For 5 years, this is all she talks about. She hates it there with so much hatred that it's incomprehensible but she keeps coming back to work there. Her coworkers also got annoyed with how repetitive she can be and she's told me about this. They told her there's so much careers out there. Why does she keep coming back to the casino if she hates it so much then quits within 5 months??

This year in 2023. she just quit one casino and now she secretly applied to ANOTHER ONE this month in August and my dad found out and yelled at her. I remembered their argument. "YOU LIED TO ME! YOU TOLD ME YOU'LL NEVER GO BACK AND YOU WENT AND APPLIED WITHOUT TELLING ME? YOU KNOW YOU ARE GONNA QUIT AGAIN. YOU DID THIS 5 TIMES ALREADY. WHY DON'T YOU LEARN? YOU CAN'T DO GRAVEYARD SHIFTS. YOU KNOW HOW SICK YOU GET WHEN DEALING PAST 3AM. WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO YOURSELF?!" I understand my mom wants to work again but doesn't know any other way to make lots of money with just a high school degree. But I agree this can't be healthy. When the other casino she applied see that she just quit 5 other major(popular) casinos within 3 years. They are gonna reject her applications because they know she likes to apply then quit after 5 months.

New business plans:

"I should buy those asian plants and sell it on facebook!"

I encourage her. She's been talking about this for a year now.

"I should cook food and sell it on facebook marketplace like those thai girls!"

I encourage her alot for this because I think she'd do well. She's been talking about this for 2 years now.

"I should work in another job that isn't the casino." *never does so*

"I wanna open an asian fast food shop with a drive through. I never seen one here in America."

I encourage her.

"I want to be a real estate agent. *Continues to explain how much money she'd make and swears she'll finish the classes to get the certificate.*"

This convinced me and my dad that she would actually do it. My dad is really hard to convince so I was surprised he let her. My dad said he'd support her until she gets a degree which is supposed to take 6 months only. She paid $1000, took the class for 5 months, then quit with no refunds.

She told me it's because the professor said she won't be able to become a millionaire until a year later because the economy is rocky right now so nobody's buying houses right now especially with the interest rates being so high for them.

I understood it but I told her like at least finish the last month and just take the exam. You get to cheat too like they do not care at all. Like just get the certificate and get it over with.

She explains she don't have the confidence to finish it. So she never finish the class or the exam. She ended up wasting $1000 even though I offered to cheat for her. ITS LITERALLY AN OPENED BOOK TEST. THE PROFESSOR LITERALLY TOLD HER THE ANSWERS FOR THE EXAM SO IT LITERALLY IS JUST FILLING IN THE BLANK.

After she did that, I've lost all hopes for her bro.

I don't encourage her to start a business because she's always quit or never make action. But you know what did she do? She bought this asian plant and gave it to some random mien woman to profit off of her for free :D R u fucking kidding me? Mom, why. That was your money right there. U bought that plant to make money on facebook but instead you gave it to some random asian lady. She was pretty disappointed in herself as well.

She always talk about: her Nightmares, hair loss, unhealthy eating, nutritional deficiencies, walking at the park, how much she hates my dad and how dirty the house is.

I don't really care and actually respond to her about it.

Things my dad always say:

"Always invest your money!"

"Just take easier classes."

Yeah sure let me just not graduate college by not taking my required Biology: Anatomy and physiology and statistics classes.

"You have to graduate with a bachelor!!"

Also refuses to support my education**

"You are gonna be a millionaire!"

"Why am I such a loser?" My dad always says that to himself.

He brags about me alot especially about how I won 2cd place on a contest and ended up being interviewed on tv.

I luv my parents but omg they are so dumb.