#if the show wants us to believe characters are parent and child they should not look like they couldve been in the same math class lol

[fandomshatewomen]

When it comes to the House of the Dragon casting with the age difference between Alicent and her kids I'd say the casting of who plays the kids is were the error happened, maybe they should have cast someone a little older for Alicent but 29 year old playing a 35 year old isn't too bad, like it could have been worse. The kids tho are supposed to be 19, 17 and 16. The actor for the 19 year old is 28, one year younger than the actress for Alicent, 17 year old is played by a 24 year old actress and 16 year old is played by a 26 year old. Why is it so hard to cast age appropriate actors, the PJO show did it, the ATLA show did it as far as I know.

I don't watch House of the Dragon so thanks for the context!

The pattern with using mid-20s actors to play mid-teens characters is so odd to me like sure I get that labor laws significantly limit stuff with minors (AS THEY SHOULD! LABOR LAWS ARE IMPORTANT!) but like, they really couldn't find a few 18-22 year olds with young faces who can passably recite lines? Really? Be serious

I'm not saying that every British teenager who wants to be an actor is gonna be Dev Patel or Tom Holland but at this point it's like these casting directors don't even try lmao

mod dyr

[mirrorcatcreditcard]

Take I haven't seen in the fandom yet:

Luka doesn't want to be freed.

"Now, MirrorCatCreditcard," you may say, "that's nonsense. Any human would want freedom from that system."

If you're thinking I'm gonna convince you that Luka doesn't know he wants freedom yet, you're wrong. I'm here to talk about indoctrination/conditioning, grooming/emotional manipulation, my own experience with those topics, and how all of the above connects with Luka as a character. If a deep dive like this is too much for you, please tap out for your own sake.

Luka's life was planned before he even existed. There has never ever been an alternative option. There is no life for Luka as anything but what Herperu chose. Everything in his life has been planned to have him be the perfect pet human idol. That is what he must be.

Fandom, I don't think most of you actually understand this and have dissected what this means (shout-out to the Luka stans who are getting there/have guessed similar things). These words we know have alternatives and are not set in stone are Luka's "gravity makes rain fall to the earth" and "water makes things wet." They are facts so deeply ingrained within him that even if shown the contrary he remarks that the person showing them is just disillusioned.

Take his commentary on Mizi and Hyun-A in the art book. He looks down on Mizi for not being able to control any of her emotions. How does he talk about Hyun-A? He has her at 70% affection yet shows a patronizing attitude—she's the one in denial at reality.

Now, how did we get here? How is a human so "delusional" and set in the control?

He's been conditioned.

Some of you don't know what I mean by this from experience and/or research, and count yourself fortunate that you don't. I pray you never experience such things firsthand. Don't worry about ignorance. Familiar or not, I will explain.

When you are surrounded by only one truth and reality, that is the way you interpret life. If a parent tells a child "the moon goes to sleep during the day," until the child learns otherwise, that's what they believe. Now take that child-like belief and add some toxic environments to the mix. With time, any other kid would learn that the earth rotates from their peers or adults around them. But if the creatures around them all say and believe the same thing "the moon goes to sleep during the day," then that is what the child continues to believe. Years of that same thing being the only truth make that false knowledge into a fact in the person's head, and everything that supports that fact is taken as truth or on the right path to truth.

"This is kinda silly though," you guys are no doubt murmuring, "All of this is a hypothetical. Give us something that makes sense or that someone could actually see happen in our society."

I'll give you my own experience then. My parents taught me that God is real. My parents taught me that I will be damned I do not follow the commandments of the scriptures. I didn't need to worry though. As long as I was obedient to the God who loved me and wanted what was best, I would be saved despite being born an awful sinful human. I was homeschooled, only interacted with people of similar beliefs, and taught that people too different from me in ideology or with radical beliefs against my own were trying to harm me and my family. I believed the people who raised me because why would people who love me lie to me? My task was simple. I needed to obey God and love everyone, especially them. Love meant giving up my entire being and living only as servant and sacrifice. After all, being selfless to the utmost was the greatest form of love.

Let's go back to Luka. His guardian, Herperu, when questioned about any surprises while training Luka, stated not only that he was the one who endured the "tough moments" but also that "(Luka) owes his success to me, and naturally, he should be grateful." This sentiment is echoed by Luka in his interview (shown on Patreon). My god, it's giving parents with disabled kids who brag on social media about how much trouble their kid is and how much they do for them. Sickening. This shows exactly what environment Luka has lived in though.

When you are manipulated into having something as your reality, everything else is fiction and delusion.

Let's review what exactly is Luka's reality.

Heperu is the one suffering if Luka has any difficulties being obedient.

Gratitude is what Herperu is owed because he goes through so much trouble to make Luka a star.

Love/care is shown by owning another's autonomy.

Emotions and bodily reactions exist, sure, but someone should be able to control them; and if they can't, someone should control those reactions for them.

Segyein are superior and the good ones for dealing with humans. Humans must be disciplined and shaped to how an segyein wants it to act to be considered deserving of this goodness.

(Luka)'s perfection is defined by his guardian.

Luka's life is directly connected to being the perfect performer. His guardian praises his abilities with the statement that no other pet human will ever be as perfect as him yet leaves an underlying threat saying that it will be no good if a pet is not trained properly. This has probably been mentally (if not physically) beaten into Luka's mind: his greatness doesn't stop him from being able to be disposed of. The human instinct to want to live has been explained to him as Heperu's wish for him to live and that has been further distorted as a duty to live for the stage he has been placed on.

Luka believes fully that there is a debt in play here. In his interview, he mentions repaying love. He thinks the relationship between fan and idol is completely normal, encouraged, and healthy. Performance is the most important thing. Being where he is is a privilege.

There's a chain here:

Heperu indoctrinated Luka into believing what he says is all true.

The guardian manipulated him easily to do what he wanted with his body and mind.

The years have been spent constantly conditioning Luka to be the god who encapsulated fantasies for the audience.

He is continually being groomed to exist for the entertainment and enjoyment of segyein.

Circle back to my first point of this post. Luka does not want to be freed. He doesn't know what freedom actually is. He sees freedom as either foolish denials of reality (and doesn't consider that actual freedom) or as controlling the song and stage when he performs (something he learned from Hyuna). He cannot want something he cannot understand. He cannot want freedom in the sense the fandom keeps speaking about.

It's funny. From the moment Luka was revealed to be hated by the fandom, I wanted to know why. Instead of digging and finding horrific deeds, I instead found a character who portrayed my own traumas and experiences. I instantly attached and delved deeply into learning about this thirty year old singer. Why does he express himself in a certain way? Where do we first see mention of him? Who does he have emotions towards? How was he trained? What makes Luka himself? I have past essays/replies to other's theories if you're interested, but in this one I got personal and didn't sugarcoat the facts. If the fandom can't handle deep thought, we shouldn't be discussing this incredibly profound and depth-filled web series.

As always, thank you for your time, and I hope my thoughts allowed you to open your mind to new things. Mostly, I hope you enjoyed them 🫶

[okiedokrie]

All Is Fair In Love And War Pt.1

Summary: Joshua is nothing if not determined. If he wants something, he'll get it; not that he even had to try before. But sometimes, like Icarus, he flies a little too close to the sun. But hey, all is fair in love and war!

Characters/Pairing: Aphrodite Incarnation!Joshua x Fem!Detective!Very Mortal!Reader

Genre: smut, fluff, crack, angst if you really squint

AUs/Trope Info: Greek God!AU, Partners In Solving Crimes, Strangers to Lovers, "time isnt linear" trope, "holy shit im kind of obsessed with you" trope

Word Count: 3,194 (Full fic is around 10k)

Warnings: Depiction of a crime scene (gore, blood, gun, conspiracy), depiction of drug use, character death (major and minor), smut warnings in the next part

Rating: 18+

A/N: I decided to split this into parts since I'm not confident ill be able to finish this within the deadline, this is part of the The 13 Gods of Olympus: A Seventeen collab hosted by @beomcoups and @wooahaeproductions! This is just the first part, so if you enjoy it, please consider signing up for the taglist. Thank you!!

In the summer of 2000, Joshua Hong was almost five years old. People always commented on how pretty he was for a kid, that he’d surely grow up to be a very handsome man.

Which is why it was a tragedy when he died from a freak truck accident.

Yes, Joshua Hong died at the age of five. For like, 10 minutes.

The doctors called it a miracle - a small child should not have survived a whole six of the twelve truck wheels, but somehow he was resuscitated, much to his parents’ delight.

This incident caused two things to change dramatically - Californetherlands now has stricter trucking laws and Joshua woke up to memories of literally being Aphrodite.

Throughout the years, from that fateful summer day to the present day, Joshua flopped back and forth between believing that the memories were just fever dreams and genuinely considering that he may be a reincarnation of the goddess. But ever since he got to hone his powers, he’s been more inclined to believe the latter.

By the age of 28, he has mastered the art of seduction. No, not sleeping with people constantly. It was more so the art of getting people to say ���yes’ to everything he asked of them.

This made Joshua a very powerful and influential figure in Los Amsterdam; You see, the way he dealt wasn’t by out-witting people or being richer than them. He dealt in favors. If you wanted to be a popstar, he’d introduce you to a famous producer, and get you a record deal that would solidify your career - all for the low, low price of free.

In turn, you’d owe him, like the many powerful people who owed him large favors.

Joshua found himself in downtown LA, in the club that he owned, just under his penthouse. He enjoyed playing the guitar and performing for his patrons, everyone seemingly captivated by his voice, or his beauty, whichever one caught their attention first. He finally strummed the last chord of his song, enjoying the applause of the crowd as the DJ started to play the usual club music. Just as he was about to retreat to the bar, a feminine voice stopped him.

“Joshua! Hey!” She said, hair bouncing over her new fur coat, jumping excitedly, calling him over.

Joshua smiled widely at her - she was one of the people he had helped start her career as a singer. He didn’t do much other than introduce her to the CEO of her current label, it was her natural talent that got her this far.

“Ah, Diana, good to see you!” He said, going over to meet her in a friendly hug, the kind that didn’t touch at all. “How has being a singer treated you? Any good news?” He said, making small talk with an old acquaintance.

“Oh please,” she started, her new haughty attitude showing, “It’s all over the news! I just got nominated for a Grammy!” She said in a sing-song tone. Joshua just nodded Truth be told, he didn’t really have much interest in pop music, but he did try to match her enthusiasm.

“That’s great! I knew you’d make it big.” he said, remembering the first time she came to him, a girl in clothes that almost looked like rags, now decked out in every designer brand you could think of. “So, what brings you back here then? Surely you already have everything you ever wanted?” He said lightheartedly. Even if all of Joshua’s connections owed him favors, it was quite uncommon for them to come back to him after having achieved their dreams.

“Well,” She said, her old, meek bashfulness coming to the surface. “I just wanted to see you again, to thank you for what you have done for me.” She tucked a hair behind her ear. “And I know no matter what favor I do for you in return, I could never break even for just how much you’ve impacted my life. So, thank you, Joshua.”

Joshua genuinely felt relieved to hear her say that - usually, people’s pride and greed got in the way of them acknowledging those who truly helped them along the way, but as he suspected, this girl still had a soul so pure. “Let's get some drinks by the bar and chat some more, yeah? My treat.” He offered, which she gladly took, the conversation between them flowed naturally, Joshua enjoying her tales of success.

It was an hour after the club closed that Diana decided it was time to head home. Joshua offered to see her off, like the gentleman he was, and so they walked to the sidewalk, her hand around his arm.

Joshua opened the taxi door for her, offering her a few bills in cash to cover the fare, “It was nice seeing you again, hopefully, you’ll make time to catch up with me in the future.” he said through the taxi window.

“Yeah, I hope I get the chance to see you again soon. Goodnight Joshua.” She said as she rolled up the taxi window.

Joshua watched the taxi drive until the end of the block, and everything seemed to be going smoothly. Then, another car intercepted her in the intersection.

It happened so quickly, too quickly for Joshua to even register the new car’s window sliding down, holding a gun out to the taxi Diana was in. Gunshots echoed through the street, the sound of tires popping and glass shattering but all Joshua could make out was the sound of two sets of four tires screeching against the concrete. Diana’s taxi collided with a nearby lamppost, the taxi flattening and curling around it.

That was the last time Joshua saw her alive.

It was all over the news ��Beloved Grammy-nominated rising star, Undyne, passed at a downtown intersection in a successful assassination.” Headlines went crazy with her story, telling her life before her short-lived success as a pop star.

The police were on her case, and the street cameras identified a black car with a non-existent plate number. they couldn’t find the people who owned it, but they did have enough evidence to call it a homicide.

Joshua, being close to the scene at the time when it happened, was one of the key witnesses to the whole case.

Currently, Joshua is in the waiting area of the police station, waiting for the detective on the case to lead him to the interrogation room where he will give his statements. He was just mindlessly scrolling through his phone when a voice snapped him out of it.

“Mr. Hong? Correct?” One of the officers asked him. He nodded to confirm it, repeating his full name. The officer just nodded too, “Okay, please follow me. Detective L/n will be there to ask a few questions.” He turned to the direction of the interrogation room, Joshua trailing behind him quietly.

The officer stopped in front of a door, “Here we are, just head on in.” He said, nodding at him. He walked into the interrogation room, the chilly air making goosebumps rise on the surface of his skin, the thin cardigan he wore did nothing to shield him from the cold. He took a seat at the chair facing the door, poking at the cold metal table as he waited.

“Good Morning Mr. Hong, I’m Detective L/n. I’m here to ask you a few questions, everything said here will be transcribed as evidence for this case, do you consent to this?” You started, taking the seat in front of him, your tone was very professional, as he expected, you didn’t even bother with pleasantries other than introducing yourself, which didn’t bother Joshua. He confirms his consent verbally, politely smiling at you with his hands clasped over the table.

“Great, I’d like to ask a few questions about you first.” You said, taking out your folder for the case, “You’re Joshua Hong, born on the 30th of December, 1995. You own the club downtown where your place of residence is also. Is all of that correct?” Joshua confirms all of the information is correct.

“You can just call me Joshua, by the way, Mr. Hong makes it seem like I’m someone important.” He said bashfully, scratching the back of his neck.

You just nod, writing something down in your notebook, “What was your relationship with Diana Kamatayan?” You asked, reviewing the official file which states that she is one of Joshua’s ‘clients’.

You were well aware of how the king of Los Amsterdam does his business, favors for favors. That’s how he got this far, and if you don’t hold up your end of the bargain, he’ll take away everything he gave you. You knew asking for Joshua’s help would make this investigation go quicker, but that would mean you’d owe him.

Owing Joshua Hong anything is a dangerous position to be in.

So while you have him in this interrogation room, you’re going to try to milk every bit of information out of him while it’s free.

“Well,” he started, getting comfortable in his seat, “She was one of my clients, I’m sure your file on me already knew that. Other than a professional relationship, I don’t really have one with her. That night was the first time I’ve seen her in a little over a year, actually.”

You nod, the timeline matches up, “And why did you meet her that night?” You ask next, trying to get more out of the nature of this last meeting.

“She approached me while I was in my nightclub. I was just about to turn in for the night when she came up to me to catch up. She thanked me for introducing her to a producer and wanted to catch up.”

Joshua really wasn't giving any information for free, as the interrogation went on you could only collect information you already knew. He didn't reveal any more than a simple google search did.

You drop your file folder onto the table, where Joshua's posture remained calm, cool, collected across from you, the small, charming smile still on his face.

“Did you get what you needed, Detective?” Joshua asks politely, tilting his head with his query.

“All I got was everything we already knew.” You sighed, rolling your shoulders in your seat. You turn in your seat, facing Joshua head-on once more. “Joshua, you are one of the most powerful and influential men in Los Amsterdam. We need your help in solving this case. All our leads have gone cold. We need your connections.”

Joshua smirked, the only time his expression changed from the relaxed and polite smile he had for the rest of the interview. His posture relaxed, leaning forward over the table, he placed his palms down on the cool metal surface, and said, “You do know what that would mean, right? The price you’d have to pay?”

You nodded, “I know all too well.”

“Asking me for a favor would mean that you’d owe me, do you think you can afford to pay that price?” He raised his eyebrows, you’d think your eyes deceive you when his irises glowed a soft gold—tilting his head in an almost teasing manner, taunting you.

Your breath hitched as you looked back at the one-way glass, knowing your co-workers were watching every detail of this interaction. “I promise I’ll deliver what I owe you. Just- please help us.” You said, not being able to look at him directly in the eyes.

He straightens his back once more, his polite smile returning to his face. “It’s settled then, I look forward to working with you Miss.”

Driving through the streets of a somewhat more affluent neighborhood, you stop in front of a well-known party den. There are plenty in Los Amsterdam, but this one was popular because of their ‘free-love’ policy.

Essentially, if you want to fuck, every surface is available to borrow for the duration.

You don’t look forward to entering the den, especially since you don’t know which surfaces are good to touch, but your partner beside you seems to be relaxed and content to visit such a place.

“God, I haven’t seen Jackson in forever. I hope he’s still having the time of his life here.” Joshua said with his bright eye-smile. You turn back to him, eyebrows furrowing in disgust. How could he find a place like this enjoyable? You don’t understand how the minds of party-goers work.

“Okay, how exactly is visiting a party den supposed to help with our investigation?” You finally ask him, he refused to elaborate on how relevant this location was when you met up with hiim, or during the entire car ride to said location.

“Well, Jackson still owes me, and he’s Diane’s ex’s first producer. If there’s anyone with a motive to get her killed, it’s her ex. I asked him to get Johnny drunk enough to pass out in one place. Now you have the perfect stage to corner and investigate him!” He said, with a smile on his face as if his plan didn’t just open up a whole new can of worms for you.

“You do know it’s illegal for me to just interrogate him without a warrant right? He might lawyer up if he figures out we’re onto him.” You said running a hand through your hair.

“Which is why I got you this,” he pulls out a skimpy party dress and matching heels from his duffle bag, “We blend in with the party-goers, that way you’re not interrogating him, you’re just having a conversation.”

“Joshua Hong you are insane.” You said, tone raising, “I’m not walking into a sex den looking like a hooker!”

“Don’t worry, we’re just trying not to stand out, please, just trust me.” He said handing the outfit over to you. You think over his words, it would be wise not to draw too much attention to yourself. If you made it obvious that you were a cop you’d have to resort to improvising.

You were never good at improvising.

Joshua gave you the decency to turn away while you changed, he was already in his usual relaxed suit that already made him look like a pimp, so he was already dressed for the occasion.

You both step out of the car, your heels clacking on the pavement below you. How Joshua managed to find your shoe size is in itself impressive, but you don’t have the time to dwell on that.

You both enter the bustling house filled to the brim with people indulging in their vices, whether it was alcohol, drugs, the ‘free-love’. It was a mess of bodies and fluids that you’d rather not inspect closely.

Joshua expertly weaved through the crowd, parting it like Moses did to the red sea. He didn’t have any difficulty locating Jackson Wang, the host of these parties.

“Jackson!” Joshua called out, the man was sitting in one of the many loveseats, a can of beer in hand and two ladies under his arms, giggling and getting very comfortable with him.

Jackson squints over the flashing lights, eyes widening in recognition after seeing Joshua. “Joshua! My man! Glad you finally made it! Got to say though, that favor of yours was an odd one. But you’ll be able to find him in my room. You know the way.” He waves him off, resuming to talking to the women clinging onto him.

You follow after Joshua, quickly climbing a few sets of stairs to get to the third floor, the entirety of the third floor was just Jackson’s room. He made sure to lock the door behind the both of you when you guys arrived.

The floor was far quieter than the floors below you, and less of a mess than them too. This room felt like Jackson’s actual home, and not like a party den.

Joshua spots Johnny stumbling around the room, nursing a liquor bottle- a few of them.

“Joshua we can’t interrogate him when he’s like this, he can barely even stand!” You said, waving your arms in front of you to point at the inebriated man.

“That’s not a problem, watch this.” Joshua takes long and purposeful strides toward him, once he finally reaches him, he takes his face in his hands and stares directly into his eyes.

You watch in awe and slight confusion, until Joshua speaks up, “You want to tell us everything we want to know, and you will be sober as a priest while you do so.”

Suddenly the haziness in Johnny’s eyes faded in an instant, his brown eyes now have a golden ring around the irises, like a puppet on a string.

“What did you need to know?” Johnny says, no longer under the influence of alcohol.

“Joshua, what did you do to him?” You ask in slight horror.

“Nothing illegal, don’t worry about it.” He said, “Continue your questioning on him, detective, if we spend any more time here Jackson’s gonna think we’re having sex here.”

Not wasting any more time you ask Johnny, “Are you aware that Diane Kamatayan had been assassinated? Do you know any information about that?” Johnny squints before his eyes widen in recognition, “Diane, yeah, her, we dated a bit. I was obsessed with her. But she broke it off when she got big. Yeah, I’m pissed, but instead of doing anything healthy with my time I just chose to shit-talk her on Twitter and drown in alcohol. When I heard the news about her passing, I lost it, went straight here where Jackson just kept handing me bottle after bottle with no questions.”

You look at Joshua, raising an eyebrow, not much of a motive if he didn’t even contact her directly in the entire duration of their time as exes.

You shake your head, back to square one then.

“It didn’t help that she started dating the old geezer of a producer of hers.” Johnny said, eyebrows furrowing in frustration, “That whore, she probably got big because that sleaze of a producer gave her banger after banger for sucking his dick or something, tch.” he said, clicking his tongue and crossing his arms.

“I’m pretty sure it was him who killed her too.”

You and Joshua look at each other in shock, eyes meeting for a second, almost as if communicating telepathically.

“Why do you think that?” You ask, cautious around the increasingly irritated Johnny.

“He’s always been a greedy bastard, worked with him before. Wanted to claim all the royalties of my song, so I sued him. Pretty sure he got threatened by how rich Diane was getting for that hit.” Johnny spat, distaste seeping into every word he said, “Now Diane is dead, and the bastard is getting married to some Slavic model, most likely cashing in all those royalty cheques.”

You and Joshua nod at each other. Joshua snaps his fingers, it’s almost as if snipping a puppet off its strings, the glow around Johhny’s eyes dims and disappears, suddenly slumping over the seat, stumbling drunkenly like he did when you found him.

“Okay, we have a lead.”

[scoupsahoy]

i know people love a villain (especially an evil or emotionally abusive parent) in a network procedural but the helena diaz hate train is a little unfounded if not misogynistic

i am on eddie's side and i love him and im so excited for him to confront his trauma and his mistakes and for the characters on the show to show up for him. he's had a genuinely concerning mental health crisis basically once every other season since we met him and i want him to focus on himself instead of worrying about being a perfect father all the time and hindering his own healing in effort to put chris first

that being said sometimes children are betrayed by their parents and go to live with their grandparents for a while. chris has been whisked away and abandoned several times growing up by both of his parents including the time his mother died. eddie is basically put on suicide watch in season 5 due to an EXTREMELY TRAUMATIZING MOMENT FOR CHRIS. the thing with kim as a whole is a result of his inability to process his own trauma and pain and it keeps happening. at the end of season 7 CHRIS calls his grandparents because he cannot trust his father and it is not uncommon or unreasonable for a kid his age who has gone through what he's gone through to live with his grandparents

like this isn't "i'm mad at my dad for cheating on his girlfriend" it's "a woman who looked identical to my mother who died suddenly and tragically when i was like seven years old was in my living room embracing my father while i was hanging out with his girlfriend who babysits me regularly due to the fact that my father is a firefighter and i am a disabled teenager"

helena and ramon are presumably wealthy, presumably retired, presumably have a stable marriage, and chris trusts them. and im not saying that that's a requirement to take care of a child but that's clearly what chris wants and needs right now

being like "helena is taking advantage of the situation because she was never a good parent to eddie and should in fact be pushing chris back to him" is

1. ignoring chris' agency and the legitimate reasons he had for calling his grandparents in texas vs like buck or someone

2. USUALLY ignoring ramon's hand in it even though ramon was the parent to eddie that was neglectful and arguably emotionally abusive on some level

3. a bad faith reading of a nuanced situation where helena and ramon ON SCREEN IN TEXT believed, supported, and empathized with eddie when they were picking up chris

i understand the desire to have a bad guy in whatever situation but also like. a genuinely really lazy boring reading to me to be like "and no one has done anything wrong except for this horrid woman who has bad intentions and probably never loved her son"

PS i know no one is going to read this let alone agree with me but if anyone uses this as an excuse to say anything bad about eddie diaz. don't

[justrustandstardust]

in honour of geto's birthday, i want to talk about the fandom discourse that paints him as a mother. he definitely has a degree in motherology (with a minor in babygirlism), but i also think it’s possible that gege is genuinely using his character to say something interesting about motherhood and maternity.

this post is inspired largely in part by @virgobingo's thoughtful meta on geto and monstrous femininity, which you can find here. i want to extrapolate from the trope of monstrous femininity and extend it to monstrous motherhood. (which @virgobingo also touches on; you should really check out their meta— it's awesome!)

geto's character is immediately established in a protector capacity, which is intensely reminiscent of the tropes that mothers embody in media. his whole thing is that the strong must protect the weak; it's his core belief. his character is premised around this belief, much like the way mothers' constitutions in media are premised on the principle that they'll go to any length for their children.

we're repeatedly shown his caring side during hidden inventory— he cares for riko, he expresses concern for gojo, he even asks about kuroi after he finds out toji supposedly murdered his best friend. it's made very clear that he's an outwardly caring person with a strong sense of duty. in this way, he parallels the textual role of mothers, whose function is to care and provide above all else. the repeated emphasis on his caring nature is what directly likens him to maternity, whose characteristic trait is tender love and care.

he also houses curses in his body. he unleashes them from inside of him, almost like children leaving the womb. these curses obey him and operate according to his will in a very parent/child dynamic. they are powerful, but they can only do what he tells them to do. he uses them to fulfil his duty according to his core belief: to protect the weak.

when he defects, his ideology fundamentally does not change— it just inverts. instead of the strong protecting the weak (the weak necessitating their strength because they can't protect themselves), now the strong must be protected from the weak (because the weak leech the strength from the strong, therefore rendering them weak).

nothing really changes; he still cares —fiercely— it's just in the opposite direction. he takes the tropes associated with motherhood and inverts them— he'll do anything to protect those under his care, including killing, because he wholeheartedly believes in fulfilling his duty as a protector (like a mother). his unwavering conviction and willingness to die for his beliefs (which are directly about those he's protecting) is the most flagrantly maternal thing about him.

toji's worm calls him "mommy" and it's not wrong. he takes in daughters and becomes the central figure of his "family"; his emphasis on family throughout the story (even as a youth) also speaks to his maternity, as mothers are often written as the binding emotional centres of familial structures.

after he dies, his body is taken over by someone who is Iiterally a mother. he embodies monstrous motherhood during life and after death, leading us to the question of what gege is trying to say about all of this. is caring too much a bad thing? does caring in one way open the door to caring in another? what happens when a mother's love, supposedly strong enough to lift fallen trees off their children, goes in the “wrong” direction?

there's also the fact that geto is male. i think gege is also asking us to reckon with how the tropes of maternity have been confined to women, showing us that these intense convictions and the depth of care attributed to mothers can apply to anyone, even (especially) if they are distinctly masculine. in doing this, he's also expanding the conceptual definition of motherhood, suggesting that mothers can exist beyond their provident care and one-dimensional duty to their beloveds.

geto's monstrous motherhood is an explosive reclamation of agency in a trope where women have been historically limited by the categorical imposition of maternity. it seeks to disrupt not only who we consider to be mothers but also what we consider a mother to be. perhaps the monster is not the maternal figure whose love turns vicious or violent, but us, who monstrously imprisoned them in the fixed role of "mother".

[akutsuir]

── .✦ 𝙎𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙏𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩

Synopsis: How would they react to you giving them the punishment of silence?

Characters: Childe, Diluc / Separated

Warnings: kidnapping, emotional blackmail, forced relationship, social isolation, reader is a little easy to manipulate.

notes: I didn't like this one so much (remember: english is not my native language)

⟢ Childe

He would be patient at first. He would pretend not to care so much about the absence of your words and how you practically pretended he didn’t exist.

He would leave you alone in your corner, faithfully believing that at a certain point you would end up giving in. After all, Childe didn't think you could handle the loneliness of being your own company for long.

However, when he realizes that you are still standing firm, perhaps even firmer than at the beginning, as if you had really built a wall between the two of you, he begins to become desperate.

First, he would bring gifts, of any kind, of any material and from any place.

He would approach your figure sitting with your back to him on the bed, and place the decorated box next to you.

“I bought this in Inazuma. It was in a very famous Kimonos store, the saleswoman said the fabric was of the best quality.” The excited tone of his voice makes you glance quickly at the box, before turning them back to the landscape outside the window, without saying a single word.

He keeps trying every day, always getting the same reaction from you.

Then he tries to start the conversation with things he knows you like, he brings you flowers, he cooks for you, this man even tries to pretend that he got hurt during one of the missions hoping that you will show some concern.

After several failed attempts, Childe loses patience.

“How long do you intend to continue being stubborn?” He pulls the book that held your attention out of your hands, throwing it carelessly onto the coffee table. His action makes you give him an angry look.

Was it difficult for him to leave you alone?

“I’ve given you enough time to get used to it, don’t you think?” Childe stops in front of you, his expression was nothing like the falsely happy one he carried everywhere. This time you really didn't know how or what to say, since the day you were cruelly locked up in this mansion, this was the first time he had confronted you directly.

“I don’t want to make this unpleasant for one of us, but you really leave me no choice by acting so childish.” Would he hurt you? Thinking about the possibility makes you involuntarily tighten the hem of your dress, you didn't want to show fear, but your body clearly wouldn't obey you.

After all, who are you next to the 11th Fatui Harbinger?

Faced with your unbearable silence, he continues.

“You know? Your parents… Seems to be going a through complicated situation recently….” Your eyes widen, standing up completely, now face to face with Childe.

“What did you do with them?!” Your voice was filled with despair. This was a thousand times worse than whatever he decided to do to you.

“Wow! Are you able to speak now?” He lets out an ironic laugh. The lack of an answer to your question despairs you even more.

“Childe, what did you do with them?” You repeat, this time the fear in your words was even clearer. What the hell had happened? What did he mean by a complicated situation?

“Calm down, I didn’t do anything. They just seem to be facing certain financial difficulties, that’s all it got to me.” The amused smile on his face didn't calm you down at all, on the contrary, it made you even more anxious.

Just like you, your family never had a stable or balanced financial life, your parents worked hard to maintain the house and provide you with a minimally adequate living condition. It was complicated, but it was enough for you. That's why when Childe showed up offering your father a chance at a job at the Northland Bank, you should have stopped him from accepting, maybe that wouldn't have given him the chance to have something to blackmail you into and make you come with him to this icy hell he called Snezhnaya.

Whoever you wanted to fool, we know perfectly well that he would find another alternative to bring you with him.

“But… And my father? He was earning enough before. What happened?"

“He was fired.” The calmness in which he spoke made you increasingly anxious, you knew that despite what Childe said before, he had definitely done something.

He was the only one who had enough power to do this.

"Why? Did he do something? Is there no way to reverse this?” You practically begged, imagining your parents in that situation ran deep in your chest.

“Well, who knows? Maybe I can do something. Let’s talk about this a little, I’d like to hear your beautiful voice a little more.”

There it is.

Oh, how cruel he can be sometimes….

⟢ Diluc

This man is desperate from beginning to end.

From the moment you start acting as if he didn't exist, his conscience weighs absurdly.

He's not very good at making conversation, so he tries to get your attention with actions. He brings you some non-alcoholic drinks from the Angels' Share, the ones that contain your favorite fruit. He leaves them in the kitchen waiting for you to see and drink them. However, they remain untouched on the counter. He always tries to get closer to you. If you are sitting in the room, he is standing in the same room a few centimeters away, pretending to read a document or give an order to an employee passing by.

When it's time to sleep, he always wishes you a good night, hoping to get at least a murmur or a grumble in return, but you just lay your head on the pillow as if you hadn't heard anything. The same situation occurs when you wake up, at the coffee table, he welcomes you with a good morning, but you just pick up some fruit on the table, without saying a single word, before locking yourself in the room.

One day, in a desperate measure, he allows you to leave.

“Do you… Do you want to go for a walk?” Diluc asks when you were about to leave the table, ready to isolate yourself in the shared room again.

You stop in your tracks, wondering if you heard right.

“What?…” You look at him over your shoulder, without turning around completely.

Seeing that his question had finally provoked some reaction from you, he stands up, now feeling a little more hopeful.

“I asked if you wanted to go out for a bit?” Diluc tries to contain the anxiety in his voice, after so long you were finally saying some words to him.

“Are you serious?” You turn completely towards him, your voice was almost like a whisper, it sounded like you were scared that he was just messing with you.

“Of course… I can take you if you want…” Ha! It was obvious.

For a moment you felt like a huge idiot for thinking he would let you go out alone. Without him.

But still, it was better than being locked up in the confines of this dark mansion twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. It wouldn't hurt to accept this walk alongside Diluc. It is not?

“I… I want to go.” If you hadn't looked away, you would have noticed the euphoria that momentarily filled the reddish eyes of the man in front of you.

“Fine. Some employees are off today, so we won't have to worry about them coming up to me all the time.”

That doesn't comfort you at all.

With a slight nod, your feet slowly guide you to the main door of the mansion. Even if you didn't want to show it, the happiness on your face was noticeable, especially to Diluc. How long has it been since you felt the sun's rays directly touch your skin? When was the last time you observed the vines other than through the bedroom window where you isolated yourself even more every day?

That was good for you, but it was even better for Diluc.

After all, without realizing it, you had handed him the most effective way to make you notice his presence every day now.

It would be bad to miss others opportunities like this just because you were having a tantrum and refused to exchange a few simple words with him, wouldn't it?

Oh, how happy he was.

tags:

[antisocialsharky]

Hello! I just wanted to say that I've been using some of your posts talking about ASPD to help me better understand it to write an OC I'm writing. I have a question though, do you mind talking about more symptoms of ASPD that I should keep in mind when writing her?

Hi! Very glad to hear that my posts have been helpful and its cool that you are aiming for good representation!

When it comes to how ASPD symptoms should be written and which ones should make it into literature, theres different opinions, so this is gonna go a bit beyond your question I guess? Just to get a roundabout view.

1. Recovery Position

• First thing to rly keep in mind is that the intensity of the symptoms, the way they present and the way the character would deal with them, absolutely depends on where they are in recovery.

• It also depends on what you understand as recovery, be that the reducing of overall symptoms so they are less often present, the act of reducing the harm that is done by your symptoms (ex: trough redirection, or actively learning prosocial behavior) or just learning to find a way to live in society the way you are. No ones view on recovery or the way they go about it (or if they decide not to) is in any way better or superior, but it is an aspect that does change how many symptoms you show in which way, so its important to think about when writing a character.

2. Covert/Overt Symptom Presentation

• Another thing to think about, depending on what fits into your story, is the question as to whether your character is very obviously antisocial, or whether they go about it in a more covert secret way. Can they control which symptoms they show when? Or are they lost to their impulses and emotions? Do they come from a background where hiding their symptoms was essential, or were they able/forced to present obviously?

• Theres also a more mixed presentation where some symptoms are more obvious and others are not, depending on stuff like what meets your needs best, how much control you have and whether or not you've done any active work on the symptoms yet, etc.

• Then you can also think about the personal opinion of your character on symptom presentation. Do they believe that they should get to just be themselves? Are they of the opinion that people just have to deal with their symptoms and accept them that way? Or do they think that they have to hide some symptoms in order to fit into society better? Have they potentially adopted some prosocial ways of thinking and model their presentation after that? Depending on what it is, it will obviously look different.

3. The Causes of their ASPD

• Depending on the type of trauma they went trough that made them develop ASPD, presentation will differ. Its highly individual of course, but theres some themes, like people who come from violent households often being violent themselves, people who were neglected struggling with the social aspects like empathy & remorse, people who were lied to/manipulated/berated all the time adopting similar manners, people who had to commit crimes and/or witnessed those often continuing to do so because its normal to them, etc.

• The other aspect is genetics, where certain tendencies can be given from parent to child or grandparent to grandchild, such as impulsive tendencies, the type of temper someone has, access (or denied access) to certain parts of the brain that are responsible for prosocial emotions, etc. Those genetics mix with the trauma and sometimes push the presentation in certain directions, so its a thing to keep in mind.

• Some CD/ASPD symptoms can also develop/be made worse trough bullying, intense experiences in childhood/teens, hanging around with people who engage in/normalize certain behaviors, etc. (ex: kids with delinquient tendencies who hang around other kids with those, may be more likely to develop that as a continous behavior). So its also worth thinking about who your character was around while they grew up, who influenced them how and what was normalized to them.

4. The Current DSM-V ASPD Criteria

• When it comes to the core symptoms of ASPD, theres 3 out of 7 DSM criteria points your character should meet. It doesn't matter which ones, but it has to be at least three! Your character should also be older than 18, have shown conduct disorder symptoms before they turned 15 and have their ASPD symptoms even in absence of other comorbidities, substances and/or episodes (Criterion B-D which I am not quoting, but thats it summed up)

• The 7 criteria points recognized in the DSM-V are (and I quote):

A. A pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of rights of others, occuring since age 15 years, as indicated by three (or more) of the following:

1. Failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors, as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are ground for arrest.

2. Deceitfulness, as indicated by repeated lying, use of aliases or conning others for personal profit or pleasure.

3. Impulsivity or failure to plan ahead.

4. Irritability or aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults.

5. Reckless disregard for safety of self or others.

6. Consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations.

7. Lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated or stolen from another.

• Everything after "as indicated by" is an example of a possible presentation. The DSM-V acknowledges that there are other possible ways in which symptoms can show up.

5. The Alternative ASPD Model in the DSM-V

• This is not used to officially diagnose people with ASPD, but is one idea, as to how personality disorder classification could work in the future. It looks at the symptoms as dimensions, under which possible experiences could fall and mentions quite a few things the current criteria doesn't, so I'll quote it below as well:

A. Moderate or greater impairment in personality functioning, manifested by characteristic difficulties in two or more of the following areas:

1. Identity: Egocentrism, self esteem derived from personal gain, power or pleasure.

2. Self direction: Goal setting based on personal gratification, absence of prosocial internal standards, associated with failure to conform to lawful or culturally normative ethical behavior.

3. Empathy: Lack of concern for feelings, needs or suffering of others, lack of remorse after hurting or mistreating another.

4. Intimacy: Incapacity for mutually intimate relationships, as exploitation is primary means of relating to others, including by deceit and coercion, use of dominance or intimidation to control others.

B. Six or more of the following seven pathological personality traits:

1. Manipulativeness (an aspect of antagonism): Frequent use of subterfuge to influence or control others, use of seduction, charm, glibness, or ingratiation to achieve ones ends.

2. Callousness (an aspect of antagonism): Lack of concern for feelings or problems of others, lack of guilt or remorse about negative or harmful effects of ones actions on others, aggression, sadism.

3. Deceitfulness (an aspect of antagonism): Dishonesty and fraudulence, misrepresentation of self, embellishment or fabrication when relating events.

4. Hostility (an aspect of antagonism): Persistent or frequent angry feelings, anger or irritability in response to minor slights and insults, mean, nasty or vengeful behavior.

5. Risk taking (an aspect of disinhibition): Engagement in dangerous, risky and potentially self damaging activities, unnecessarily and without regard for consequences, boredom proneness and thoughtless initiation of activities to counter boredom, lack of concern for ones limitations and denial of the reality of personal danger.

6. Impulsivity (an aspect of disinhibition): Acting on the spur of the moment in response to immediate stimuli, acting on a momentary basis without a plan or consideration of outcomes, difficulty establishing and following plans.

7. Irresponsibility (an aspect of disinhibition): Disregard for - and failure to honor - financial and other obligations or commitments, lack of respect for - and lack of follow trough on - agreements and promises.

Note: The individual is at least 18 years of age.

6. Other Common Experiences

• Theres a few experiences that quite a few people with ASPD report, that have not explicitly made it into the criteria. Sometimes these are examples for certain symptoms and/or are implied, sometimes these have been studied but haven't been written as a requirement for diagnosis and sometimes these are not supported by science/still debated by science.

• Apathy, a total lack of emotion, overall muted emotions or having trouble to access certain emotions, is something some people with ASPD talk about a lot. There is no scientific consensus yet, as to whether this is an ASPD symptom. Some theories suggest it falls under PTSD (absence of positive emotions & tendency to experience negative ones and/or having dissociated away from the emotions and/or having put up a sort of non permanent barrier as a form of protection), depression (common comorbidity, anhedonia & apathy can both be part of it), other PDs (schizoid, borderline episodes, etc.) or something else entirely. While its not sure whether its caused by ASPD, or not, a lot of people with it seem to report differences in their capability to feel a full range of intense emotions.

• The criteria talks about aggressiveness and physical fights, which is not the only way in which this symptom seems to commonly present. Harming animals, homicidal ideation, dealing with aggressive thoughts & urges without actually acting on them, verbal aggression, taking out aggression on self or property, etc. are also often reported.

• The current criteria doesn't mention it at all and the alternative talks about a complete inability to form bonds, but community consensus seems to be, that while forming emotional bonds is harder & happens more rarely, it is still possible. The intensity differs (some describe the bond as a logical construct, some only do platonic bonds, some only do romantic bonds, some describe deep obsessiveness, etc.) as does the number of people they find themselves bonded with. Theres also a significant amount of people in the community that describe a phenamenon similar to BPDs FP (aka a bond to a person that is defined by the symptoms of the personality disorder).

• There is some debate on whether or not an absence of prosocial inner standards makes it impossible or more difficult to define personal morals and understand how morality works. Some people with ASPD say they have no difficulties, some report that they struggle with the understanding part, some say they struggle with upholding those norms and others struggle with both. It seems like ASPD could make it more difficult to understand and/or respect the way societies morals work for some, which makes room for conflict.

• Personality Disorders are what we call egosyntonic, which usually means that they are in alignment with what we as people think is the correct way to feel, think and act. This doesn't mean that its inherently impossible to change the way you think/feel/act and that recovery is impossible, but it may make it more difficult to break out of the patterns (if that is what one wants). Some people show little problems in this area, some need a lot of outer assistance and others either can't or don't want to change.

7. Other Things To Keep In Mind

• You should probably think about whether your character fits the psychopathy subtype & if yes which definition of it you want to use (theres different theories)

• ASPD can influence every aspect of your life, so it may interfere with things in such a roundabout way that you wouldn't even think about it at first (ex: Disregard for safety of self => Disregard for your own health => You get ill carelessly => You dont take ur meds responsibly, or put off a doctors visit for months/years => You end up with longterm damage => You don't treat it responsibly => You get more ill => Death. Which happens to ppl without ASPD too, but can indeed be a presentation of that symptom.). Additionally comorbdities interact & interfere with ASPD symptoms and may alter/add onto presentation!

• You could also always add the ASPD stigma into the mix and how your character responds to it/how it influences them. Does it make them not wanna recover? Does it make them wanna recover even more to prove everyone wrong? Are they trying to get into therapy but no therapist wants them? Is it on a court record and causing problems that way? Do they lose relationships/friendships? Does it change the way they see themselves or others? etc.

• The key with ASPD characters is not to just make them into good people or portray them as angels and also not to always make them into the cruel villain. The key is to show that they are an individual, a human being, a single example for what this disorder can present as. If you can somehow portray that the presentation of ASPD in your character is just how this specific character is and is not how the disorder inherently presents itself, you nailed it! Cus u'll have ASPDers who want to just stay the way they are and who are exactly what you'd imagine a cruel villain to be like, you have ASPDers who you couldn't ever distinguish from a prosocial person, cus they learned to blend in and you've got ASPDers who decide that they wanna do a 180 and behave in the most prosocial way possible and then you have everything in between and beyond. So as long as your character would meet criteria, as long as you're not spreading misinfo and as long as its clear that its just one example of a possible presentation, you're good in my opinion (but this is indeed just my opinion and others may disagree).

Note: If you need examples for the specific symptoms, you can ofc send another ask, this is more of a general overview of what exists, cus going into detail on each would make this post wayyy too long.

[heartofsol]

Elise & the Duke

Elise's relationship with her father isn't discussed very much. I think it's actually one of the most interesting aspects about 06.

In a flashback, he's shown telling a young Elise "Don't cry" and "Become a strong queen who doesn't cry no matter what happens" in response to her grieving over her mother's death, which is...not great. A child should be allowed to grieve over their deceased parent. Although the Duke means well and says this because he genuinely believes strong leaders never cry (which is far from the truth), that doesn't make what he's doing okay. It doesn't matter that he's saying it in a soft and gentle tone, either. To a child, it's likely gonna seem like a dismissal of their feelings (which it is). This also shows that he was telling Elise to never cry before he used her as a vessel to seal Iblis.

Another thing I find interesting is that Elise says "I understand everything my parents said to me now." It could imply that Elise's mother held the same sentiment as the Duke, but we don't know for sure.

Now, onto the Solaris Project. Some time before the project began, the Duke told Elise that Solaris' power would allow them to travel through time and rectify past mistakes. The main reason the Duke began the project was so Elise could see her late mother again. Once again, good intentions, but the Duke experimenting with supernatural forces beyond his understanding cost him his life and hurt many people, perhaps his daughter most of all.

So long story short, the project goes wrong and the Duke is fatally wounded in an explosion but shortly before his death, he sealed the Flames of Disaster in Elise and pretty much left her clean up his mess. She was cursed to never shed a single tear, had to rule an entire kingdom at a young age, is relentlessly pursued and kidnapped by a madman who wants to harness her power, and when she makes a single friend, he gets murdered right before her eyes by the creature that her father experimented on all those years ago. Elise is suffering the consequences for her father's actions.

And how does Elise feel about her father after all this? She still loves him deeply. She doesn't express any anger towards him or angst about the way he treated her, or that he inadvertently caused her suffering, even though she has every right to do so. You get the sense that she doesn't even realize her father's "love" was actually quite abusive, which is just really tragic. She's been conditioned to accept this as her role in life and you can see it in her behavior. At the start of the game, Elise lacks confidence, is unsure of what she can do in her situation, and even blames herself for the things that are happening. Her attitude gradually changes when she meets Sonic, who encourages her to be more proactive and truly enjoy life instead of being restricted by her role as a princess.

Yet people get on Elise's case for breaking down once at the tail end of the game over the fact that she'd lose the memories of her only friend and would be separated from him?

Elise doesn't mean what she said in this moment, and blows out Solaris' flame to save the world seconds later. She had to bottle up her emotions for a decade and now has to say goodbye to the person whom she grew to love over the course of their adventure. Her reaction here is more than justified.

Elise is such a good character 🤍

[lurkingshan]

Cherry Magic Episode 12

MY HEART IS FO FULL. This adaptation has exceeded my wildest expectations to become one of my favorite bls of all time. They really put their backs into it and gave us everything we could want for these characters, and I will always be grateful. This show managed to be a faithful manga adaptation, a loving homage to the jbl, and a fresh take on the story all at once. An amazing feat to pull off and this creative team deserves so much love and kudos.

The way Achi and Karan have grown together over the course of this show has been fantastic to witness. I love how seriously the show took their growth, and that we got to see them put in the work to improve their communication and become a great team. Meeting the parents was a big step for them, especially because they were uncertain how their respective families would react, but I loved that they were so open with each other throughout about how they were feeling. I loved, too, that we got a contrast, with Achi's mom being so warm and loving (but still managing to get a dig in on her son, lmao) and Karan's being more avoidant and passive aggressive and needing a talking to her from her eldest child to get her shit together. I love that the drama created space for things to not go perfectly with the parents, and to show us that people can be moved to acceptance.

We got a bit of a parallel with that message in Jinta and Min's story this week, with Min's fans initially attacking Jinta, but backing off once Min named him as his faen and asked them to respect his relationship. I like the choice to model positive fan behavior, and it felt a bit pointed from this production company. Both with Pai and now with this new group of fans, the show has said consistently that being a fan should be about love and support, not control. That you can admire your idols but you also need to give them privacy. That it's not your place to judge who they love. I just love that message.

Of course, I have to talk about the mutual proposal and the wedding. I am pretty sure Karan has been carrying that ring around in his pocket since the second day of dating, but it was such a welcome surprise to see that Achi had already made his own plans, too. The show really succeeded in taking this relationship from something that felt a little one-sided to a very mutual partnership I can believe in. I teared up when right along with Karan when Achi followed Karan's proposal with his own, and you could see how much it meant to him to know that Achi is really truly on the same page. Getting to see their wedding and the love surrounding them on their special day was the cherry (lol) on top of this fantastic love story. I also absolutely loved the wink to the jbl elevator non-kiss in the way they framed their final married couple kiss and then cut away from the bed.

Continuing the love fest, I also love the changes this version made to the side couple's story. Min getting to fulfill his dream, Jinta being an excellent supportive partner, their agreement that they will marry someday when they're ready--it was all just lovely. The nod to the jbl pen proposal was cute, and I love that they took it a step further by drawing rings on each other. The flip in the sexual relationships was also quite welcome, with that triumphant arc reserved for the main couple in this version. Jinta ended the show with his magical powers still intact, but it didn't seem like that would be the case for long.

As for Rock and Pai, I am happy with how the show handled their story. To the end, Pai stayed true to herself, and Rock came to know her better and understand what kind of romantic relationship he could reasonably expect from her. She will always have her head more on her ships than on her own love life, and he seems okay with it. I think you can still take an aroace read on this Pai if you choose, and I appreciate that the show made space for that. I like, too, that Pai helped Rock reconnect with his own passion for dancing and find a fun outlet for his creativity. They were another reinforcement of this show's overarching themes about the importance of kindness, support, and clear communication in relationships.

This show left me with such a warm feeling. I'm so glad they stuck the landing, that episode 8 never happened, and that we can rewatch and remember this Cherry Magic so fondly. I never expected Thailand to go so above and beyond the original live action drama, but they have undoubtedly delivered my favorite version of this story.

[chaifootsteps]

I think the thing that bugs me most about the 'Stella was always evil and you guys just ignored the signs!' crowd is that they don't seem to realize there's like, scales to how bad characters are?

Stella of season 1 is classist, shrieks a lot and is focused more on her own needs, but there's a difference between that and who she is in season 2 - a 2D abusive monster who in her own words only exists to torment Stolas

the Stella of season 1 didn't seem like a nice person but there was enough room to imagine the marriage had at least been civil once even if it had never been loving (the photo of them all at Loo Loo Land suggests she came along for Via's sake, she phrases it 'our bed' not 'my bed' when she's angry at him for the affair)

fans point to her hogging the covers and not wanting to get up as signs but those arguing about who should get up to comfort a young child and one partner stealing the covers isn't signs of pure evil. it's a sign that Stella is focused on her own needs re: the covers, but not immediately getting up to Via doesn't make her evil since the writers didn't bother showing it's not a pattern that she doesn't pull her weight in the parenting department. same with her not saying good morning to Via when she's older - it's not unreasonable that she's a bit distracted by her husband cheating on her in that moment.

speaking of, the writers caused themselves problems with opening on the fallout of the cheating, because it leads most fans to assume that what they're seeing isn't Stella's usual self and we'd expect to see what her usual demeanor is later, when she isn't in the middle of being furious with Stolas.

the closest s1 gets to showing Stella as the flat baddie she'd become in s2 is her ordering the hit on Stolas, but again the writers fumbled the bag because we don't know if her doing that is unusual for them being in Hell or not. Were we really supposed to think Stella is uniquely bad in s1 when other characters yell at each other just as much as she yells at Stolas (Blitzo, Loona, even Moxxie sometimes) and other characters perform hits and act like attempted murder is nbd (IMP)?

Same with the lack of worldbuilding around how nobility works - fans claim she just cares Stolas slept with an imp 'like a plebian' but then the rest of the show is so wishywashy about whether it matters dating outside one's own social class that it comes off like she was just given this prejudice so she can look uniquely worse (even though Stolas is just as classist, just in a different more objectifying/fetishizing way)

Exactly. Seasons 1 Stella wasn't a pleasant person, but she still shared a bed with Stolas and was upset that he cheated on her in that bed specifically, used to go with Stolas and Via to Loo Loo Land, and the portrait of them together sees her looking almost happy. Stolas starts to say "We weren't in love," showing awareness of the root of the problem, that neither of them wanted this. All of that goes out the window with S2, where we're meant to believe Stella was evil incarnate since she was a toddler and Stolas is God's saddest victim.

Not that it would have saved her either way. In this fandom's mind, "raises voice to Stolas" and "a violent, irredeemable person who deserves humiliation and death" are synonymous.

[harveyguillensource]

Harvey's full feature and photoshoot with Robert Ascroft for IRK Magazine has been published, including a fantastic interview ranging from fashion to Shadows to 'letting in' and wishes come true. Some excerpts below:

On Letting In and identity as a home:

Remember that there's no ticking time bomb. Especially with what's been happening lately where a lot of actors who are portraying certain characters and their sexuality might be questioned, and they are outed, or they are forced to come out before, um, they are comfortable doing so. Everyone's sexuality, actors, everyone included, is their business. It's no one's business. It's their business. For people to want to know or to negate us, why don't you tell us? Why are you not telling us? Why are you hiding it? Why can't you just tell us? Tell us right now.

Forcing someone to come out... And I hate that term, too, COMING OUT. Because we know what we are, it's not the first thing they woke up that day and realized, oh, my gosh, I'm gonna tell everyone today. Everyone who knows that they are gay or that they are queer has been thinking about it. Believe me, it has been on their mind. They have thought about it. They have talked about it to themselves in the mirror. It is not new to them. And so for the idea for someone to come out is always kind of, kind of, uh, a little upsetting to me. I don't think it should be coming out. It should be called LETTING YOU IN. Because I already know who I am at that point when I share this information. They already know who they are when they share this information with you. Coming out is never really for the person. It's for the people who are surrounding them. Coming out is always for the person who wants to know. [...]

Coming out is always for the parent who is questioning you and just wants to have peace of mind. Coming out was for you to feel that you are still loved in this phase of your life or this new revelation. And it should not be called coming out. It should be called letting you in. And what you do with that information is up to the par- eh, the person who just discovered. That they let you in, and what you do once... It's like welcoming someone to someone's home: please don't destroy my home. I opened the door, and I stepped right, and you stepped right in. And it's up to the person who's my guest to either wipe their shoes, be cautious of the frames, or be careful of the furniture. Please don't, you know, jump around and destroy the home I had made. It's usually... What happens is you may let people into your homes that they trusted, and it turns out these people have no respect for your home, and they make a mess out of it.

[...] I knew that I was different and that people knew I was different. But also, as a child, that makes you go back in. It goes back into your home, closing that door and looking out the window. Cautiously, I look through the curtain, ensuring no one notices the vibrant colors inside. And no one's seeing that you put up wallpaper and that you're considering changing the tapestry, but always looking out the window. Cautiously looking out the window, ensuring no one's ever too close to the door. Eventually, you get comfortable enough to open that door and let people in.

On the evolution of Guillermo's fashion:

I do fall into the character when I am dressed for the part of Guillermo. Our fantastic costume designer, Laura Montgomery, who won the Emmy for our show's costume design, is incredible at her job. We sit down and talk about the season's arc and where we want this character to go. Guillermo wears these 1980s oversized sweaters that you can find at a thrift store. But the character is obviously more layered than that. The detail in the costume is so specific. Have you noticed his outfits from season one, where his collared shirt is buttoned up to the top, and then he puts a sweater over, and it's a long sleeve? [...]

He started off not showing any skin. Dressed a little bit frumpy and a little bit oversized on him. He wears khaki pants or brown pants and comfortable shoes. He does his hair to a specific look that he's trying to emulate because he thinks that's what a person of his position should look like. It's always what he thinks people expect from him. And it's not until he finds his own inner self of who he really is, so the essence of who Guillermo is, where he finds out that Van Helsing blood runs through his veins, that he starts getting a little comfortable in his skin, and we start seeing a little more of a fitted look. We see him with the fitted blue vest when he finds that out. He wears a thin, pinstriped white shirt that he unbuttons the top, so the collars are a little looser. He rolls up the sleeves, but he wears some brown gloves for grip to get those wooden stakes quickly.

So all those things are thought out, even the tucking in of the green cargo pants into his boots to make it easier and not to get tangled in anything in a quick escape. That trench coat that flares out so beautifully, we talked to Laura about that, that he needs to feel that he could easily take several weapons out of there without anyone questioning it because you never see it. The coat flares out with an excellent movement to it. You'll see it in the "The Night Market" episode where he fights other familiars. His coat is beautifully flared out, making him such a badass. Then, when he finally takes that off, he's a badass himself. That look was more fitted to my body, making the character look more fit and in shape. In some ways, whatever size you are, fitted clothes always look better on everyone. [...]

In season four, we see Guillermo be the best man to Nandor and help him choose wives that come back to life as the right wife for him to marry and stick to her. And after doing that and being the best man at his wedding, he wears a different outfit than we usually see him. He wears, like, this cream turtleneck with a moss green tailored suit, uh, that's really nice and compliments my skin tone. And that was Laura and I talking and looking at sketches and the materials and what's soft on Guillermo and what would be another, wink of wow, he has a little bit of fashion sense there. It's just that he's never felt comfortable in his own skin.

Sometimes, I think people are too scared and timid to risk wearing something that they might say, "I liked wearing that." But they don't take the risk, and so they're like, "Nah, that's fine. I'll just stick to the norm everyone knows me to wear." It's great for people to experiment with fashion.

On fashion, accessibility, and taking risks:

[...] I mean, for so long, you know, people always ask me, "Who's your stylist?" Or "Who dresses you?" For the longest time, for a majority of events and stuff, I dress myself. Uh, because for a long time, nobody wanted to, or not that they didn't want to. I feel they didn't know where to start to dress a person of size. Designers carry sample sizes.

For people of size, it's easy to feel that fashion is not for them, but that's not true, fashion is for everyone. It should be made and accessible to everyone. Especially when you look at the body and shape and sizes of most people worldwide, specifically in America, it makes sense to be represented in Fashion Week. And when it's not, it's a little upsetting because it's like they're no different than someone who is a size zero, size four, size... It doesn't matter. They're the same. You know, the same money. The same person who likes fashion could be of any size. [...]

I don't think anyone's gonna be on their deathbed saying, "You know what I wish? I wish I would have taken less risk in this life." Said no one ever. You know (laughs)?

I'd instead look back and say, "Oh, my gosh. Do you believe I wore that?" You know what? Yeah, I do. Sometimes, we're amazed at the things that have happened in fashion. It becomes part of history. And so when you look at stuff, it's not the embarrassment of a fashion faux pas that maybe you have done. But for the most part, you were in a time, and it was captured. That is everything down from your hair to your shoes, outfit, or even makeup if you're wearing makeup. It was like a time capsule, and it was captured in that moment. And so if you don't take a risk, you're not living in the moment. You're trying to fit into a time that has already passed or is already lived by someone else. So why not live in the moment so it's captured as a capsule for yourself and a moment in time.

On channeling his success into charity:

[...] In high school, I was looking for all these grants and scholarships for low-income Latino students in the arts and whatnot. I've been creating something where we can be of help to lower-income communities with kids who have an interest in the arts. Because that's the first thing we know: when budgets get cut in schools, especially in public schools, the first thing that gets cut is the art (not sports) but the arts. These kids have no other outlets. So there needs to be an outlet then how is there a possibility for a career or a life in the entertainment industry. Even if it's, you know, the first-ever scholarship, or like the Harvey Guillén-like scholarship, for young up-and-coming artists. Something that would help because I know that going through college was such a burden of thinking, "I don't have a trust fund.

[apomaro-mellow]

Hot for Teacher(s) 10

Part 9

Shawn tried not to think too hard about his dad and his teacher dating. He knew his family was a little different than the others. Most people had two parents. But he’d never ask for his sire to show up. Never in a million years. He still remembered how bad it got. 

It made him a little wary of Mr. Munson. He didn’t think he’d ever hit his father. But sometimes pain wasn’t physical. Even when Billy hadn’t put his hands on Steve, the yelling had been horrible too. But Steve had been in love. And there had been a time when Billy cared for him. He’d told Shawn so.

Shawn couldn’t believe it. People in love didn’t do that kind of thing. People in love did things like go out on dates, gave each other gifts and scented each other nicely.

Like how Shawn could smell Mr. Munson on his dad. He probably wouldn’t have been able to tell who it was if not by his powers of deduction. They’d been sitting on his bed, his dad reading him a bedtime story. He didn’t bring up the scent, or how it made him feel nice. He just hoped Mr. Munson would stay around a while.

“Are you and Mr. Munson in love?”

Steve fumbled with the basketball in his hands and Shawn used the opportunity to steal it from him and go for a shot. He missed, but getting a steal from his dad was still nice.

“He and I are…dating, as you know”, Steve said, grabbing the ball as it bounced his way. “I think it’s a little too soon to be using words like ‘love’.”

“He’s over here a lot”, Shawn said.

Steve didn’t know how much he should read into that. Was Shawn saying he didn’t like Eddie being around so much? Did he feel like someone else was taking time away from Steve? It was hard to tell with his son sometimes what he was thinking.

“How come you always make me go out when he’s over?”

“I don’t always-”

“I know you’re going on a date every time I have a sleepover. And I’ve been having a lot of sleepovers lately.” Shawn’s expression was a little too mature for a child his age.

“First, don’t interrupt, it’s rude. Second, I thought you liked having sleepovers.”

“I do. I just don’t know why you don’t want me around Mr. Munson. I see him all day at school.”

Steve kept his body language nonchalant while dribbling the ball. “Well that’s just it. I figured you’d be sick of him. He’s at school AND at home?” He shot and the ball went right in. 

“If I score more than you, can we get ice cream?”

“Shawn, it’s January.”

“I want chocolate with gummy bears.”

Steve was still thinking of it a few days later when he had sent Shawn on yet another sleepover while he, Eddie, and Robin got drunk and gave powerpoint presentations on a subject of their choice. Robin was about ten slides deep into one about why TV shows sucked on writing lesbians on purpose but somehow made the most compelling character chemistry on accident.

At first, he’d been sitting close to Eddie, legs in his lap, playing with his hair but Steve had learned that Eddie never sat still for long. Every few slides, he’d jump up with an interjection and Steve knew if he didn’t want to flop off the couch, he’d better not get too tangled.

Robin was very open to discussion. Heated discussion but still. Steve finally cleared his throat when they started getting closer, hands moving wildly as they argued about the sexuality of Sandy the Squirrel.

“Hey, it’s Powerpoint Night, not debate night”, Steve said.

Robin gasped. “Steve! Can we have debate night. We finally have a third party to mediate.”

“What do you guys need a mediator for?”, Eddie asked.

“She has very strong opinions on salted caramel”, Steve said. “Your turn Eddie.”

Eddie got up, his presentation popping up as he cleared his throat. “Pluto’s Planet Status: Logic vs Sentimentality….”

Robin stayed the night, taking up the guest bed while Eddie went up to Steve’s room. He’d been inside before, but it always felt momentous. A space that not many had seen before and Steve was allowing him. They collapsed next to each other, limbs tangling through the night.

The next day, they got up, making a breakfast of sausage, eggs, and other greasy things to stave off any hangover symptoms. And before Eddie left, Steve asked a favor of him.

“Do you…mind scenting some of the pillows? Not for me, but for Shawn? I want to gauge his reaction to the idea of you becoming more…permanent.”

Eddie’s eyes got wide. “Do you want me to be more permanent?”

Steve bit his lip and nodded, moving in close to scent Eddie at his neck. “You’ve always smelled like safety to me. And now…you’re starting to smell like home.”

Eddie wrapped his arms around him, confirming that he felt the same. He wanted more of Steve’s scent around his own home. Eddie completed the favor, scenting the soft throw pillows on the couch. 

When Shawn got home, he had Steve spent most of the day inside, doing various things but when the sun set, they had a movie night. Steve tried not to look too giddy when Shawn grabbed one of the pillows and held it to his chest, nose pressed to it. His body language may have been neutral, but the happiness must’ve shown in his scent because Shawn started to cuddle up to him. His omega hindbrain was filled with thoughts he hadn’t allowed for a long time.

Good alpha. Safe. Perfect alpha. Perfect for pup. Need to scent pup. Need him scented by both. 

That was all Steve needed to move things up to the next step. He enacted it when picking Shawn up from school one day. He was mindful not to take up too much of Eddie’s time during dismissal, but Eddie always assured Steve that he’d rather talk to him than the other parents.

“What if you’ve got something important to tell them?”

“That’s what emails are for. And really, how many times can I say ‘your kid cried because someone looked at them’ or ‘ they’re chattier than a telemarketer’?”

Steve figured some things about being a teacher didn’t change all that much between the age groups. He built up his nerves to ask the question. He had already asked Shawn if it was okay and his pup was more than happy about it.

“You know, Shawn’s birthday is coming up soon. We usually go out and do whatever he wants. And we were wondering if you wanted to tag along?”

Eddie looked between them both, mouth agape and looking like he wanted to jump for joy, hug them both, and blast off like a rocket all at once. It really made Steve want to kiss him in front of all these people, parents, teachers and all.

“Hell yeah-I mean, y-yeah”, Eddie stuttered when he remembered where he was.

Shawn looked elated too and things couldn’t be more right.

And of course, that was when things started going wrong.

Part 11

Tags

@anne-bennett-cosplayer @aol19 @lololol-1234 @gregre369 @attic-cat-blog

@hippieg1rl420 @spectrum-spectre

[okiedokrie]

All Is Fair In Love And War (TEASER)

Summary: Joshua is nothing if not determined. If he wants something, he'll get it; not that he even had to try before. But sometimes, like Icarus, he flies a little too close to the sun. But hey, all is fair in love and war!

Characters/Pairing: Aphrodite Incarnation!Joshua x Fem!Detective!Very Mortal!Reader

Genre: smut, fluff, crack, angst if you really squint

AUs/Trope Info: Greek God!AU, Partners In Solving Crimes, Strangers to Lovers, "time isnt linear" trope, "holy shit im kind of obsessed with you" trope

Word Count: 900+ for the teaser, est. 10k≤ for the full fic

Warnings: Depiction of a crime scene (gore, blood, gun, conspiracy), depiction of drug use, character death (major and minor), smut warnings under the cut when full fic is uploaded

Rating: 18+

A/N: This is part of the The 13 Gods of Olympus: A Seventeen collab hosted by @beomcoups and @wooahaeproductions! This is just the teaser, so if you enjoy it, please consider signing up for the taglist. Thank you!!

In the summer of 2000, Joshua Hong was almost five years old. People always commented on how pretty he was for a kid, that he’d surely grow up to be a very handsome man. 

Which is why it was a tragedy when he died from a freak truck accident.

Yes, Joshua Hong died at the age of five. For like, 10 minutes.

The doctors called it a miracle - a small child should not have survived a whole six of the twelve truck wheels, but somehow he was resuscitated, much to his parents’ delight.

This incident caused two things to change dramatically - Californetherlands now has stricter trucking laws and Joshua woke up to memories of literally being Aphrodite.

Throughout the years, from that fateful summer day to the present day, Joshua flopped back and forth between believing that the memories were just fever dreams and genuinely considering that he may be a reincarnation of the goddess. But ever since he got to hone his powers, he’s been more inclined to believe the latter.

By the age of  28, he has mastered the art of seduction. No, not sleeping with people constantly. It was more so the art of getting people to say ‘yes’ to everything he asked of them.

This made Joshua a very powerful and influential figure in Los Amsterdam; You see, the way he dealt wasn’t by out-witting people or being richer than them. He dealt in favors. If you wanted to be a popstar, he’d introduce you to a famous producer, and get you a record deal that would solidify your career - all for the low, low price of free.

In turn,  you’d owe him, like the many powerful people who owed him large favors.

Joshua found himself in downtown LA, in the club that he owned, just under his penthouse. He enjoyed playing the guitar and performing for his patrons, everyone seemingly captivated by his voice, or his beauty, whichever one caught their attention first. He finally strummed the last chord of his song, enjoying the applause of the crowd as the DJ started to play the usual club music. Just as he was about to retreat to the bar, a feminine voice stopped him.

“Joshua! Hey!” She said, hair bouncing over her new fur coat, jumping excitedly, calling him over.

Joshua smiled widely at her - she was one of the people he had helped start her career as a singer. He didn’t do much other than introduce her to the CEO of her current label, it was her natural talent that got her this far.

“Ah, Diana, good to see you!” He said, going over to meet her in a friendly hug, the kind that didn’t touch at all. “How has being a singer treated you? Any good news?” He said, making small talk with an old acquaintance.

“Oh please,” she started, her new haughty attitude showing, “It’s all over the news! I just got nominated for a Grammy!” She said in a sing-song tone. Joshua just nodded Truth be told, he didn’t really have much interest in pop music, but he did try to match her enthusiasm.

“That’s great! I knew you’d make it big.” he said, remembering the first time she came to him, a girl in clothes that almost looked like rags, now decked out in every designer brand you could think of. “So, what brings you back here then? Surely you already have everything you ever wanted?” He said lightheartedly. Even if all of Joshua’s connections owed him favors, it was quite uncommon for them to come back to him after having achieved their dreams.

“Well,” She said, her old, meek bashfulness coming to the surface. “I just wanted to see you again, to thank you for what you have done for me.” She tucked a hair behind her ear. “And I know no matter what favor I do for you in return, I could never break even for just how much you’ve impacted my life. So, thank you, Joshua.”

Joshua genuinely felt relieved to hear her say that - usually, people’s pride and greed got in the way of them acknowledging those who truly helped them along the way, but as he suspected, this girl still had a soul so pure. “Let's get some drinks by the bar and chat some more, yeah? My treat.” He offered, which she gladly took, the conversation between them flowed naturally, Joshua enjoying her tales of success.

It was an hour after the club closed that Diana decided it was time to head home. Joshua offered to see her off, like the gentleman he was, and so they walked to the sidewalk, her hand around his arm.

Joshua opened the taxi door for her, offering her a few bills in cash to cover the fare, “It was nice seeing you again, hopefully, you’ll make time to catch up with me in the future.” he said through the taxi window.

“Yeah, I hope I get the chance to see you again soon. Goodnight Joshua.” She said as she rolled up the taxi window.

Joshua watched the taxi drive until the end of the block, everything seemingly going smoothly, up until another car intercepted hers in the intersection.

It happened so quickly, too quickly for  Joshua to even register the new car’s window sliding down, holding a gun out to the taxi Diana was in. Gunshots echoed through the street, the sound of tires popping and glass shattering but all Joshua could make out was the sound of two sets of four tires screeching against the concrete. Diana’s taxi collided with a nearby lamppost, the taxi flattening and curling around it.

That was the last time Joshua saw her alive.

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[thesummerstorms]

I can acknowledge that the text SAYS that Annabeth Chase worked out her problems with her dad, that her stepmom seemed "nice", and that her "resentment" is described as seemingly unimportant in Blood of Olympus. I can acknowledge the text SAYS that Annabeth's family problems are resolved.

However. That does not mean that I actually buy it. If RR wanted me to accept that outcome, he should have done the actual work of proving it.

Yes we have the scene with the plane and Mrs. Chase telling Percy that Annabeth has a home.

But those two scenes in TTC don't actually work as a source of a resolution to that plot thread because they don't address the root of the problem- Annabeth being hurt by Frederick's neglect and her step-mother 's blame/callousness.

Even if they ARE trying to do better now (which to honest, feels like a cop out to me, almost as if RR just decided he no longer wanted to write that thread and cut it off quickly) the problem lies in what already happened in the past and how badly Annabeth was hurt by it.

She could have died so, so easily, and even if you want to argue perfect intent for the Chase adults (which I don't) she was emotionally fucked up by what happened for years. This has already happened.

But there's not even a hint of an apology or actual reflection on what caused those events and how things need to be moving forward. It's just assumed that TTC automatically fixes everything.

And yes, I actively have a post going around about how an author has to pick and choose their narratives and what they want to focus on for what characters.

But I would argue that RR already chose to make that plot line an important part of the plot- given how it drives Annabeth's motivations and actionals on an emotional level for pretty much all of TTC- it's just that he handled it badly.

If it was going to be addressed, especially if it was going to be "fixed", then we needed more to convince us that Annabeth had reason to trust her parents again. And again, for me one plane scene that doesn't go into what Annabeth has already experienced doesn't work for me personally.

Especially when you look at things like how Annabeth was still living in boarding schools full time, her description of the night she ran away in HOH, her persistent fear of abandonment.

And before anyone brings it up, I do actually have some sympathy for Frederick Chase. I personally am deeply adverse to the idea of having children of my own, so putting myself in his shoes of having been given a whole infant I never wanted and didn't know was a possibility, freaks me out a little too!

BUT. That doesn't change the fact that he had a responsibility as an adult-

to either choose to raise Annabeth fully as his child and accept the responsibility that entailed

OR

to find someone who could take care of her the way she deserved if he was not emotionally or mentally able to fulfill those needs.

I'm not saying any of it would be easy, but he did in fact have a basic obligation to make sure Annabeth was receiving care from SOMEONE. That's basic decency as an adult with some form of power over a child even if he DIDN'T want to be her father.

But his refusal to actually commit to either path just did MORE damage in the long run.

And he's free to try and make amends, I guess. People can change.

But I just don't feel there's enough to show that he really has long term, much less to give ANNABETH reason to believe he has.

[starillusion13]

I Know it's weird to ask erm.... but Can you pleaseeee do the four seasons of love one with Yunho version because I want to imagine him in that fic and am currently obsessssssed with YUNHO. I know I can read the fic inserting his name but stilll PLEASE IF YOU CAN DO IT.

FOUR SEASONS OF LOVE (Yunho ver.)

Pairing: Ateez! Yunho × f! reader

Genre: Slight angst, Fluff, Slice of life

Warning: self doubt, hints of hating and willing to end life.But our big baby is there to comfort you and show that life is worth to you when you are with right person. A lot of comfort through the images of seasons. You all are precious remember it.

W.C: 4.2k+

Network: @k-vanity @cultofdionysusnet

A/n: don't accuse me for plagiarism coz if you have read this fic before then you must have read the Chanyeol ver.This plot is basically inspired from his solo songs but I had literally Yunho on my mind for this but as I had a request for Chanyeol oneshot so I used this. Thanks to the anon for making me post it.

Many thoughts storming through your mind. Your mind swirling like a cyclone, heart clenching and hands going numb. Nobody wants you, no one even cares for your existence. Maybe they are right that your parents left you at the orphanage because you are unwanted. Why? You never hurt anyone or being a threat to anyone. The only person you have your faiths and trust on has suddenly turned their back to you. You never thought that you have to witness a day like this too after being treated like a shit all these years. Was it not enough for you already?

"Why should I live now?"

Tilting your head back and closing the eyes, you let the raindrops fall on your face directly. Hairs are already drenched and sticking to your forehead and neck, not even caring to move the strands falling on your eyes. Numb hands growing cold under the heavy rain, eyes swollen with crying but people might mistake your eyes are red due to rain. Each falling drop getting mixed with your tears rolling down. Tears of pain? Tears of loneliness? Tears of betrayal? No. Tears of hope.

"Why can't everyone be happy?"

You must be right. Not everyone deserves to be treated as someone's priority. Someone has to feel the pain to let others be happy. You lightly chuckle on your own thoughts. Like always you have to be the sacrifice. Your feet move on its own and now you are standing in the middle of the road surrounded by abandoned constructed buildings. At least there are no people here to judge your every moves.

Unknowingly, you spread your arms and head still facing the sky but with a little smile adorning your face.

"Can I fly alone?"

Its past safety hours at night and you are getting soaked in rain in an empty street and thinking about flying. Are you a child? Maybe only if you can be a child and someone would care about you and take you in their arms and whisper Its okay. I'm here for you.. You want someone to care for you, someone to give you the warmth you crave in your life. This cold rainy night is befriending your nightmares to make you alone, to make you feel...you are not good for anyone.

"Such a bad girl.”

Your eyes shot open on hearing the voice. Rather a very familiar teasing voice you must say. You don't even care to look in the direction to know who the person is but let the raindrops pierce your eyes directly, making you to squint on the effect.

"If you are trying to be blind then I have some better options for you to try."

Better option? Death. You don't see any will to live your life. What life? To be an extra character in everyone's story. Every individual on this planet has their own story but you must believe that you are just the extra one in their story to make give them more spotlight by increasing the sea of people.

"Why are you here?"

"Well, I should have asked you the same, little angel."

Little angel. If only you could have been one then you would have done everything possible to be happy. Just be happy and away from these people who blame you for everything. You are a bad luck to everyone.

Bringing your hands to yourself, eyes fixed on the broken wooden board hanging from the wall of a building to your front. Your back still facing the person but you can feel the stares burning on you.

"I'm not in a mood for your jokes."

"I'm asking you a question not joking. This is not your colony and also not mine but the complex there is mine and I come here often. So, what brings you here?"

"Can't you just leave and let me be alone for once?"

Silence. That's what you got in return. Like others, he also left. Your heart clenched on the thought and your shaking hands turned into fists by your side.

Why are you feeling like this? Its not like you were appreciating his presence, or were you? At least him teasing you whole day somewhat makes you feel that someone care to spend a little bit of their time to talk to you....... To tease you maybe. With hope, hope? You turn around slowly, gaze following how each drop hitting the ground and shattering into tiny droplets. Just like your hopes to see him behind will shatter soon into pieces of disappointment, loneliness and pain.

"Yunho?..”

He is still there, hands in the pocket of his hoodie and eyes boring onto your figure. You feel a bit of joy but for what, just to see him standing there? Like the way an angry mother scolding her child for being out so late. Your shocked eyes contacting with the daring eyes of his challenging self as if it's challenging you to look away.

“You are still here.....I thought-“

"You thought like everyone else I will also leave you alone here." His tone is monotonous, not even hinting any sort of emotions behind it, neither of caring nor even of hatred.

You nod your head obliviously.

He 'tsch' and shakes his head, footsteps approach you. You try to avoid the closeness, panicking you are looking everywhere to just run away from him. But deep down, you want to stay close to him, to hear his teasing voice and to make you annoyed until you glare at him and he will return you a playful wink. At least, he never made you feel alone or ever hurt you.

"Why?"

Why? It's obvious because am not a one to waste your precious time on. You want to scream this on his face but you feel your throat becomes heavy with a lump stuck inside. You are about to break down because you can't take this feeling that someone is waiting to hear your response. Caring for you.

"Please..go away...if you are here to tease me later for this then please go away."

"Do I hurt you?"

"Huh?"

"Do I hurt you with my teasing?"

"I d-don't know." No.

“Do I make you uncomfortable when am around you?"

No.

He paused but your lost eyes staring at him made him continue. "Do I burden you?"

No.

You want to scream but you can't utter a single world but gazing up at him with lost swollen eyes. His warm hands cupped your cheeks. Why are his hands warm and yours cold? Oh, God has a priority.

He is also drenched but not like you for almost over an hour. His few portions of the clothing are soaked but his hairs are getting wet fully, his umbrella lying upside-down at the side of the street. Why is he getting wet despite having an umbrella?

"Do you hate me?"

No? Yes? Do you? Well, you really didn't think of him like this way before. Do you really want him to go away? You never felt hurt because of him. Rather you enjoy his company. You don't know whether it's bad or not but you love his presence. His presence is the last thing that can burden you. When everyone is turning their back to you, he is the only one looking at you with mischievousness of course.

"Yunho...don't ask me this." Your fingers tightly hold his wrists but you are keeping his hands close to you, leaning to his touch more. Seeking the comfort in his warmth, you are feeling safe.

"Why?"

"I, myself don't know how to respond you."

The rain has stopped but the tears still keeping your eyes wet.

"Y/N, will you let me hold you like this forever? I can't see you broken like this anymore. You don't know how much it hurts me whenever I see you crying."

"What are you saying?"

“Everyone breaks you down but you try to stay strong. You put on a fake smile just to lie to yourself that you are fine. But I want to see the real you.”

“I-n-no...I'm fine."

"Really? Crying alone in the middle of the street under the heavy rain and I have to believe that you are fine like always."

"Why are you being like this Yunho? I hate when people show me comfort out of pity. I am used to being alone like this so just leave me and go away."

No, please don't go. You try to move away his hand but he doesn't budge and his cold eyes staring deep in your orbs as if it can read the hidden truth behind those tears. His thumbs brush over your cheeks, wiping away the tears which are rolling down. Why are you crying? He is not doing anything to you.

"This is why I never approached you to show my care. I always see you getting hate from the ones you have trusted and that's why I wanted to be someone to you whom you will have some different kind of feelings. I didn't want you to see me as others who is just pitying you but I wanted you to see me treating you like a regular person.”

"Different kind of feelings?"

He squeezes your cheeks and smiles at your silly face. Those slight dimples occurring in the end of his smile on the cheeks, your hands move upward to touch them and you can feel him lean to your touch and closing his eyes for a moment.

"Yes, puffer fish. Someone approaching you like you are a loner to their eyes and then suddenly turning their back to you when you actually started to lean on them. I never wanted that to happen between us. I wanted you to see me differently from others. So, I started to tease you and you have to agree that sometimes I have really made you laugh. Also, your glares, you think you look so angry and scary but you just look silly."

"Yaaa." You slap his arms and his dimples deepen when he smiles wider which brings a little smile on your lips.

And this is Yunho. The tease who doesn't leave a single chance to annoy you even at this moment when you are so vulnerable and confused with your feelings. But what is the meaning of different kind of feelings?

"I wanted you to see me as an annoying person who can make you angry, frustrated, getting on your nerves so you make silly faces at me when am too much overbearing and also laugh with me on my jokes. But-"

His fingers tracing your cheekbones and big doe eyes staring at your swollen eyes.

"But?" your voice is like a whisper but he can still hear you.

"But I always try to make you forget others, how they mistreat you, how they ignore you, how they hurt you. I don't want to see you cry over them. I want to see you smiling Y/N."

"Why are you doing this, Yunho?"

You are suddenly being held in a big warm hug, him holding you tightly as if you might blow away with the light breeze blowing after the heavy rain. Your body shivers due to the weather but his warm hug feels so comfortable and you wrap your arms around his big frame. Can you provide him the same warmth back?

"I can't see you like this Y/N. Please let me be a part of your life. Please."

Your body again shivers to the wind and he retreats from the hug. A part of your life? Which life? The one you don't even know what is the use of its existence where everyone knows just to hurt you and ignore you.

“Y/N?"

"Hmmm...”

"Let's go home. You will catch cold like this."

"I don't want to go home."

Why? The place where you feel secure, away from all the judging eyes but suffocating yourself with the thousand thoughts within those four walls of your apartment.

He suddenly picks you up in his arms, your shocked face getting a chuckle and wide smile from him.

"What are you doing? Put me down."

"Well, if you don't go by your own then l'm taking you like this."

"Yaaa put me down. You don't even know my place and if I start to shout right now, you will really be accused for kidnapping.”

"Hm that's right but I can say that someone was trying to end her life and I am just being her saviour. Also, I'm taking you to my place so please keep quiet and let's go before you really die of this cold."

Die? Yes, but will you be really okay after that?

"No. I will not go with you.?

"And I'm not leaving you here."

"Yunho...”

“Please Y/N.” His creased forehead and serious look urging you to agree with him.

You nod but still your thoughts are running as why you are trusting him so much. If tomorrow like others he will also leave you.Then? He will act as a stranger to you. He will avoid you as if today never happened between you two. His teasing will stop and he will hate you because he has seen you vulnerable so many times. You have cried in front of him many times but why you always show this side to him even when you had a boyfriend. Well, that shit was only there for you for a bet and just left you alone in the darkness when you were taking things too seriously according to him. How foolish of you! You thought he was the perfect one.

But this feeling being in Yunho’s arms and feeling safe and having the warm comfort, you never had this with your boyfriend and this thought is really disturbing you.

"Yunho...” He looks down at you when he enters the complex building to make his way towards the elevator. "Why?"

"What?"

"Are you really caring for me because we are.....we know each other?"

Pressing the twelfth floor by his elbow, he nods to himself.

"Because you are my four seasons of love."

"Huh?" Your confused face only got a tight smile from him. You ask him again but he didn't say anything instead waiting for the floor. You thanked mentally that other people didn't get in and see you like this even when you tried to make him put you down but his teasing was the only thing keeping you distracted. Ding! You have arrived to the floor.

He puts you down but still holding your one hand, the other one unlocking the door. With a pull, he lets you inside the apartment and locking the door behind. Your eyes taking in the new environment, each and every piece of decoration screaming richness, looking around the way, your eyes caught a photo frame of a family picture. You didn't notice when he left you there wandering on your own, returns with a towel in his hand.

"Is that your family?"

"Yes. That's our last picture which we clicked when I was in middle school.”

Oh! Suddenly you feel him put the towel on your head and starts rubbing the scalp and hair. You try to stop him and insist that you can do it yourself but he doesn't budge and continues. After having satisfied with your somewhat dried hairs, he gives you a pair of spare clothes to change into but your hesitating self is not willing to do it in someone's apartment.

"Are you really going to stand here in these clothes?It's already raining again and I don't think it will be nice for you to go at this hour. I will not let you go even if you put your rebellious acts."

"But I can wait until it stops raining.”

"You will let your clothes get dry on you? No way, I don't want someone to fall sick in my place.”

"Its okay."

"Do you want me to change your clothes or what?"

"Yaaa Yunho."

You hit his arm earning a loud laugh from him and he pat your cheeks directing you to his bedroom to use the personal bathroom and he will use the other one. After getting freshen up, when you make your way towards the living room, he is standing by the wide glass window showing the blurry city view behind the window because of raindrops hitting the glass.

"What are you doing there?"

He is in black t-shirt with matching trousers and hairs damp after shower and you in similar grey set but of his size. He turns around and scans your form which makes you a bit self-conscious. And man, he suddenly starts laughing holding his stomach which brings a frown on your face.

"Why are you laughing?"

"You look so funny in my clothes. Yo-you look like a kitten got dumped under a pile of clothes.”

You go beside him to take a peek at outside because you love to watch such views in rainy days. You shoot him a glare when he pinches your cheek between his laugh.

"It's not my fault that you are literally a giraffe.”

If there was no rain then the city might look so silent from up here, right? If I have lived somewhere like this, I would have got a better life, right?

You feel arms wrap around from your back and him resting his chin on top of your head. Your stiff body and lost eyes watching the reflection of yours on the blurry window that how much height difference you both have.

"I love you, Y/N."

Love you? Is he teasing you again? If yes or if no, in both the cases, he should not love you because, you don't want him to turn his back too when he will be bored of you. You don't want to lose him too.

"Don't. You should not love me. One day you will also get tired of me and leave me broken. So, it's better how we are now with each other. Like just...friends."

“Don't you want to hear my answers to your question?"

"Which one?"

"Why you are my four seasons of love?"

"Hm...Tell me.” Your fingers tracing some patterns on the glass against each raindrop hitting the frame.

“Tell me the sequence of seasons."

"Ummm Spring Summer Fall Winter?"

"Yup. I love you differently in every four seasons so I cant ever get tired to love you."

"What?"

"Let's start with spring. The season of love, the blooming start of every individual, every life and every relationship. We can start our first love in the spring when there will be bright sunlight with birds chirping as if a melody playing for our bond. Holding hands under the cherry blossom while knowing each other for the first time. The joy, love and beginning of our life will be in this season. Every year this season will be the start to our love from the beginning."

"Summer?"

"Summer is the season of explore, when our love will take the centre of the stage. The clear sky with blazing sun and warm breeze hitting our skin making us feel to be loved by each other. A warm love between us where we can explore into each other's depth like the way the whole world gets explored by the bright sunlight. We will travel together, explore the life and our love. The bond between us can be taken to a different stage where the only spotlight will be on our romance."

"Fall? Will our love fall here?"

"No. The beginning of fall is with rainy days when we can have our breakdowns. Don't think it as fall, see it as autumn. We can show our vulnerable selves towards each other without any hesitation. The grey clouds making the atmosphere dark and gloomy, the falling leaves from the living trees making it seem like a dead. Our relationship should show all its fault in front of our eyes. No one is perfect but our imperfectness makes each one of us unique and an individual to stand out otherwise we all would have considered same. We can cry with the rain, we can fail in our life but we will again stand on our feet the next day holding each other.”

"Winter?…….”

You can feel him nuzzling his nose into your damp hairs inhaling his shampoo, a smile ghosting over his face. Your one hand still busy on the glass while the other one takes a hold of his hand around you. A wave of comfort and warmth spreading over your body. You can sense yourself being held in safe hands, protected from this whole cruel world and him describing you why you should let him to love you. But winter, the cold environment when every relationship drifts apart because of the numbness in their bond. Will it happen to you too?

“Winter. Well, the season of festive. The most romantic season when we can make more love with each other, we will support our decisions, will spend time together. When the whole world will be under the thick cold white blanket of snow, we will find the warmth in each other. The season when we can share our most hidden secrets and light up mysteries hidden in the cold darkness of our life. We will solve our problems and make love with joy in the festivals like Christmas eve and new year. We can also have one more thing."

"One more thing?"

He turns you around, caging your body between his warm frame and cold window frame. His hands resting beside each side of your face. His big doe eyes watching your every reaction on the face with a sly smile resting on his face and his puffy cheeks again making an appearance. Your hands on the window space keeping your balance leaning backward due to his close proximity. He leans forward to whisper in your ears.

"Winter is also known as the cuffing season. Maybe, we can plan our future in some other ways."

Your big round shock eyes earn a wide smirk on his face. He laughs when you hit his arms and try to move away but he holds you in the place with a soft look and an admiration in his eyes. As if you are the most precious aspect of his life which is resting in front of his eyes.

"Let me love you, Y/N.”

"Yunho. What if I don't deserve you?"

"We don't know ourselves what we deserve or not but we can give chances until we lose hope on everything. And I don't want you to lose hope on me. Please don't leave me.”

Leave him? This is the first time, someone is asking you not to leave them and you are sure you are not going to do the same thing like others did to you. With a last glance on his face, you hug him catching him off guard but he quickly returns you the hug. His cologne hitting your nose strongly and a spell of hope surrounding you both. His heart beating against your ears bringing a melody of love and your heart matching the beats. Your fingers curling to grab his t-shirt in your tight fist. Tears rolling down your cheeks and his hands moving up and down in your back to soothe your nerves with overwhelming feelings.

“Thank you, Yunho. I love you."

"I love you more angel.”

He pulls you away to press a soft kiss on your temple, on your eyes, on the tip of your nose and then pauses. Your heart racing with every kiss from his warm lips. With your closed eyes, you nod to him.

He closes the distance between your lips. Holding the back of your head and the other resting on your cheeks, he deepens the kiss. A passionate kiss for a blooming love. This is a perfect kiss like a dance, a symphony of lips and chance for a new beginning. A moment where time stands still and all the world is hushed and still. The outside loud cold rain is blocked by the window pane for the silent warm love inside. Only lips, no tongue, no other skin as if only the lips can swallow each other to protect them in a cage.

Breaking apart from the kiss, his forehead rest against yours and he presses a soft kiss on your nose. A genuine smile filled with joy dancing on your lips and he smiles back to you. Fingers wiping the fallen tears which are drying on your cheeks.

"I love to see you smile when it is raining."

"I love to see your soft puffy cheeks when you smile."

"And my teasings?"

"Yunho....” you whine on his ask.

"You will always be my four seasons of love."

Standing close to each other, in a warm embrace of love and the cold rain making the whole city gloomy except where you both found each other's happiness and love. Each drop of your loneliness, pain and disappointment is breaking down into love, joy and hope.

Your smile is the umbrella for you under the rain and the sound of falling rain is the rhythm to your life and he is the sunshine to make you dance in the rain. Yes, you are his four seasons of love and. And he to you?

"And,You will be my sunshine in every season."

Reblogs and Reviews are always appreciated. Please do me favor and reblog it🙂.

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[twistthescript]

☯️ for Ricky?

Okay, I have another (very delayed) list comin y'all's way.

Ricky's likes and dislikes, here we go:

Likes:

As a child, he did actually like dogs. There was an old pitbull who lived down the street and was known to wander and it always showed a lot of love to the cats at his house.

He enjoys testing his own limits. This could mean his physical, mental, or emotional limits. He knows what he should be doing, and what he can do, but someone will probably find him stuck in a corner somewhere because his wheelchair got caught.

Careening off of the previous point- he likes listening to people and helping them with their issues. He enjoys being helpful, because in the back of his head (in some very messed up way), it means that he's being included. Plus, he's just a very selfless character and very realistic. If he can help, he will. If he can't help as much, he'll listen.

During his more achy days when he uses his wheelchair, he enjoys speeding down the halls after school because there's no one to stop him.

He adores Cats: The Musical- he even has a 21 year old, scraggly gray cat named Grizabella who's older than he is- and he treats her like the queen of her own castle (she is. duh)

He sometimes makes his own stickers to put on his crutches. You know, the notebook paper drawings that you press between two layers of packing tape? Yeah- he's drawn all of his cats and adhered them to most of his things. He puts them along the inner side of his crutches so when he sits down, they're facing him.

Dislikes:

Contrary to popular belief, and however well-founded it would be- Ricky doesn't hate Ocean. He hates her way of thinking and her attitude towards him and other people.

He hates onions. He doesn't cook with them, nor does he keep them in the house (his parents went along with that). His reasoning? They're toxic to cats.

Dogs. The pitbull from earlier was fine. When that dog died, the next puppy in its place attacked one of his cats and bit the rubber grip off of Lady Marzipan.

Math. Mostly because all of his teachers believed him to be incompetent- and Ocean was always in his class. He's actually very good at it, but mucks up the test answers just enough to barely pass. They can believe what they want about him, but their perception of him is not his problem... and he'll play along for shits and giggles.

That's all I have for now! Cheers!