#if any of you reading this posts feminism+gardening

[natsmagi]

some more natsume gender posting but i do admittedly get very annoyed when i see people claim natsume hates things related to femininity because thats just. Blatantly not true. i did make a post a little while back talking about natsumes gender generally (might be a lil dated by now but eh), but there are some additional points id like to make

first thing being natsume very much enjoys more feminine things!! particularly things related to baking/gardening because thats what he would do with his mom when he was little!!!! (plus his newly added skill being cooking!)

with this and his undying love for his mom in mind, does it not make sense for natsume to hold feminine activities fondly? not only is he quite good at it, but it reminds him of his childhood spent with his mom!! he looks up to her alot!! and hes also thankful for the childhood he had because it makes him feel more unique. literally how does any of this read as a hatred towards femininity or his upbringing??? his mom is literally his number 1 inspiration and shes the reason he had this upbringing to begin with. Frankly the assumption that he hates feminine things just flat out does not make sense

and he doesnt even necessarily mind things like "-chan" either. though this one depends entirely on the person. for example kanata is allowed to call natsume nacchan but if tsumugi calls him natsume-chan blood will be spilt. to re-emphasize the point made in my previous post; natsumes biggest concern is being viewed as weak. he hates being infantilized more than anything. when tsumugi calls natsume "natsume-chan" thats not tsumugi feminizing natsume, thats tsumugi reminiscing on the child natsume he used to know. when tsumugi calls natsume "natsume-chan" it feels like hes not being taken seriously, that hes still viewed as a child, that he hasnt matured (which is also why he doesnt like being called "cute" bc. yknow. kids r cute). and this is a REALLY big insecurity of his. he hates being viewed as naive. In the same vein though, natsume is insecure about not being manly enough too (such as him viewing his inability to swim as "not manly"). Which is also a really interesting point of discussion when it comes to natsumes character! but its important to note that his insecurity in his masculinity does NOT translate to a hatred of femininity. natsumes relationship with gender is an incredibly nuanced one and its so frustrating when people dont even bother trying to read into it and just completely generalize his character

with that said natsume DOES have some internalized misogyny though. But this ones kinda hard to navigate as. well. Almost the entire cast has had some to a certain extent at some point. esp in the early stories. which could all just be bad writing. But it adds to the complexities of femininity and womanhood, how the two are often associated despite being distinct from one another. and with this distinction between the two it adds ANOTHER interesting layer to natsume and his own relationship with gender, because we know he didnt mind being raised as a girl (its just incredibly fucking embarrassing that people know about it), yet his views on gender seem kind of........ Conservative. with him assuming anzu is bad at games bc shes a girl, claiming arashis lying to kids by calling herself a princess, worried that people will view him as less of a man for being unable to swim, etc etc. Like you truly cannot just read ONE story and think you now have a full grasp on natsume and his relationship with his gender. i cannot stress enough how complex it is. but this complexity is exactly what makes it resonate. if you're insecure, it makes sense for you to develop a toxic habit of punching down in order to get higher, esp since we know natsume doesnt handle his emotions super well

this section will be very speculatory and is just my own personal analyzis, so dont take it as gospel. But from my understanding it seems like natsume does genuinely enjoy more feminine things, but hes caught up in gender expectations (potentially due to him knowing both what its like to be a girl and a guy?) that this can cause him to say admittedly quite bigoted things due to his insecurities. natsume is a character that wants to be perceived a certain way; he wants to be cool, mysterious, alluring, but as we should all know by now This is a front he puts on. he very often puts on fronts and lies about his true nature and intentions. which all reads like a fear of authenticity. i dont think natsume genuinely holds those beliefs previously listed, he is just afraid of being vulnerable and, once again, having weak points exposed. he was told to be a girl when he was little and now hes basically told to be a guy without having the Common Guy Upbringing, which can easily turn into developing beliefs of toxic masculinity if you're the type who "plays the part" rather than being your authentic self. hes being told what a man is by the world around him so he tried to shape himself into it to play the part. He can be very blunt and cruel in his words to others, but i personally just see it as a projection from his end. its an attempt at making himself seem better and manlier than he actually is by using his words where hes lacking in action. You can pull off alot of mind games with a simple sentence alone. words can paint a deceiving picture if used correctly, and natsume is a fortune teller; if anyone knows how to say the right thing to get a certain impression from someone its him

i do also think its important to note that as time goes on natsume is starting to express himself genuinely more. Just like the rest of the enstars cast; his story is one of growth and bettering yourself as a person. coming to terms with who you are and learning to let others in

either way. im not one to gatekeep but i need ppl who dont read switch stories to stop speaking so definitively on natsumes relationship with his gender or im gonna start throwing rocks at people

TLDR this shit is NUANCED and to say its 100% this or 100% that does it a disservice to me

[poognthebrainbois]

Get to Know Us!

Hey Y'all! We're the Songbook System!

Some general/collective info:

• Call us Song! (Unless we specify who's fronting)

• Collectively they/them (but feel free to ask if you don't know a headmate's personal pronouns)

• Bodily 21

• Bodily white

DNI:

• ENDOS/People who think you can choose to be a system.

(Edit: fake systems of any kind - do not fucking interact)

• People who think introjects are their source

• Anyone who uses age regression in a sexual context

• Minors just be safe and know your own boundaries. We will most likely not interact directly.

Please interact:

• Traumagenic systems

• OC writers

• DnD players

• Spn fandom

• Mlp fandom

• Fans of the MCU

• X-Men movie fans (have not read the comics but interested)

• Btvs and or general vampire fan

• Artists!

• Small critter enjoyers

• People with cats

• Shitposters

• Gay people (only the cool ones that are inclusive of aspec people)

Fronters/tags below:

Frequent Fronters/Posters:

(And their sign-offs/tags)

Parker

Werewolf transgenderism personified. Resident Dog Boy. Growing out our wolf-cut. Loves scritches, walks, and food. Guy in a 90's movie energy.

- he/they 🏳️‍⚧️

- Host

- 21

- Horny on main, trans dogboy disaster posting

- 🕷️

- awoo ahaha fuck

Poog

Lil' guy. Muppet child. Loves kibbies, mac n cheese, and our friends. Speaks in solely tumblr vocabulary. Just happy to be here! :)

- they/them

- mood booster

- smol

- mostly cute animals, very specific tumblr humor.

- 💖

- Pooger time!

Steve!

Subsystem of guys who are so snazzy but so mentally ill. Funny!!! Clown magician man!!! Cannot describe him with words but he is a hoot!

- he/him

- /complicated/

- who knows??

- funny. Haha.

- 🎩

- the clown takes the center ring

Zinnia

Basically the only feminity the system has. Technically an introject of our LARP character? Kinda? Older sister/mom vibes. Loves flowers and the night sky. A sweetie, we love her

- she/any

- caretaker?

- slides, early 20's to like "mom mode"

- personal blog posts, cute animals, "pretty things", self-care/self-love posts

- 🌸

- Zinnia's Garden🌸

Okay that's it! :)

[lettucedloophole]

hi apologies if youve alr made a post abt this (if u have, then maybe u can add a link to that specific post?) but i just wanted to ask for ur perspective bc this is smth i keep getting hung up on and i rlly only trust u to answer:

why would abolishing gender be harmful to trans ppl if transphobia stems from emphasis on traditional gender roles, and the abolishment would further their focus on relieving dysphoria thru physical sex change instead of relieving it by having to conform to sociological femininity and masculinity as a means to adapt in this patriarchal society?

thank you for taking the time to read and answer this <3

no worries! i haven't made a post about this before since no one's asked, but i'll answer it right here for you.

the answer is, it wouldn't be harmful. abolishing gender would ultimately be the best for everyone, but especially lgbt people & women. however... the contextualization of this point is what makes or breaks it. let me explain--

trans people have a negative reaction when people discuss abolishing gender not only for the same reason cis people might (a kneejerk reaction to protect the status quo), but also for the very valid reason of wanting to defend transness in a transphobic society. it's the same reason why some gay people will react negatively to the fact that homosexuality is a social construct, and therefore cannot be innate; most people use this argument to justify homophobia & patriarchy.

the thing is, to abolish gender, sex must also be abolished as it's the primary method of naturalizing gender. sex is a social construct-- it's not natural. however, terfs and any garden variety conservative will reify gender through the naturalization of sex. they'll say, "cis women and men are natural, but trans people aren't. therefore, they must be eliminated." similarly, "heterosexual people are natural, but gay and bi people aren't. therefore, they must be eliminated." eliminated can mean killed or, forcibly dissolved into the "natural" categories via bullshit self-loathing propaganda.

a really easy way to understand why this is so upsetting to trans people is just comparing their situation to gay people or women's, really, as they are so similar. if you walked up being like "wow i cant wait for gays to be abolished<3" ofc people will assume you mean it in a homophobic sense rather than a complicated, radical feminist sense, and if you're focusing on the abolition of minority groups in particular, it does likely stem from bigotry. not saying that you've said anything like that lol, but those examples are the best way i can illustrate the point.

also, everyone on the internet hates radical feminism, so regardless of how eloquently you explain your point & how sensible it is, if you associate it with radical feminism people will ignore what you say, misinterpret you so severely that it seems deliberate but could very well be internet stupidity, and also throw tomatos at you. 😭 radfems, matfems & a handful of marxist, anarchist, intersectional fems + womanists are the only ones i trust to not be covert antifeminists.

last p.s.: we don't know what a society outside of patriarchy looks like. assuming people will continue getting sex changes assumes the existence of a natural sex binary, though it's possible people may change "sex" characteristics as they please. trans people's issue is not only being forced into gender roles, but a hatred of transness which puts them into a catch-22 regarding survival under patriarchy-- they're "reifying patriarchy" if they transition, but plagued with dysphoria, martyrs to a post-patriarchal world centuries away from us if they don't. perhaps, a similar scenario would be if you told a gay or straight person to simply see people as gender/sexless and to experience attraction, to give affection as though we lived in a post-patriarchal society-- it just wouldn't be possible, and for the gay person who is particularly vulnerable under patriarchy, it would more likely be traumatizing. dworkin put it so succintly in woman hating...

i hope that wasn't too repetitive or long, i just wanted to be thorough. admittedly, this is kind of a loaded answer if you aren't familiar with sex as a social construct, so if you have anymore questions, feel free to ask!

[dalyonicdyke]

a short intro post

i meant to do this when i initially made the blog, but here we are lol. like my bio indicates, i'm seeking community and follow those that i feel are like-minded or share characteristics with me (that i can determine).

please feel free to message me if you'd like me to unfollow or whatever else. also, if you're a minor and i accidentally followed you, please let me know so i can unfollow. i try to check bios to avoid this, but sometimes things slip through the cracks. i'm also really only seeking mutuals with those in their 20s and up.

i don't seek to agree with everyone on everything pretty much ever - but with that said, the internet is a tiring place, and when push comes to shove, i am almost always going to seek my community with other lesbians and defend them first before my feminism. the more research and reading i do, the more i feel out of sorts with how i identify politically - radical lesbian feminist is the closest fit, but it is not a perfect fit by any means. i have been engaging with the literature/research/tenets/etc of rfism (and adjacent materials) for over 10 years now, though, so i am pretty aware and comfortable with what i do and do not believe in.

some info about me:

female, lesbian, late 20s, gnc, white american

things i like:

reading, baking, gardening,

learning languages, video games, my cats

also i just recently got into making my own sourdough starter and i want to get into bread making so if ur into that too hmu lmao

anyways i'm not sure what the etiquette is around here now, but please feel free to message me!

[balkanradfem]

Hi!! like so many others your blog is a joy for me! do you have any other blogs similar to yours for gardening content and feminism (not necessarily discourse, I follow many radfems for that and it can be. a lot.) I’d like to see some more positivity and hope for women!

garden and nature content: a-place-for-growth, homostead, tightwadspoonies, chaosfrisur, hedgehog-moss,

feminism+gardening: sustainableseparatists, t-ierrahumeda, rascalraccoon, floatingbook, itisthefunpolice

[gimme-mor]

ACOTAR THINK PIECE: ELAIN ARCHERON, UNTOUCHABLE

*DISCLAIMER*

This will be a long post.

Please take the time to read this post in its entirety and truly reflect on the message I am trying to send before commenting. My goal is to use my background in Gender and Women’s Studies to deconstruct the comments I have seen on Tumblr and Twitter and bring awareness to the ACOTAR fandom.

The reason I am tagging “Elriel” in this post is to call attention to the arguments in the Elriel fandom that: weaponize Elain’s femalehood to shame real life people for their opinions about Elain’s character and her relationship with Lucien; victimize Elain’s character in fandom discussions; and coddle Elain’s character, which limits fandom discussions about her narrative development and prevents the ACOTAR fandom from holding Elain accountable for her actions and inactions in the same way that the fandom holds other characters accountable for their actions and inactions. It is for these reasons that I WILL NOT remove the “Elriel” tag from this post because all of the above points contribute to the toxic discourse surrounding Elain’s character.

I urge those who use these arguments to understand their implications, why they are problematic, regardless of intent, and reexamine their contributions to the ACOTAR fandom. I WILL NOT tolerate anyone who tries to twist my words and say I am attacking people and their personal shipping preferences. In fact, I AM CRITIQUING THE ARGUMENTS THEMSELVES NOT THE PEOPLE USING THE ARGUMENTS.

Also, I highly encourage the Elriel fandom to read this post because it addresses how the concept of choice as an argument enables arguments to exploit social justice and feminist languge in order to vilify Elucien shippers, among other problematic things.

Elain Archeron is one of the most polarizing characters in the ACOTAR fandom. Though opinions about Elain vary, arguments in the Elriel fandom cite society’s perception of traditional female characters in comparison to non-traditional female characters as the reason behind the hate, and this belief is used to provide an explanation as to why other characters in the series are favored over her. In the series, Elain is portrayed in a wholly positive light and this image carries over into the Elriel fandom, painting her character as a good and kind female who has been unfairly wronged and a victim of circumstances that were out of her control. When arguments in the Elriel fandom oppose other viewpoints in the fandom, they fall into one of three categories:

Category 1: Weaponize Elain’s femalehood to shame real life people for their opinions

Maybe people who hate Elain are just jealous of her in a weird way similar to when someone hates the pretty, nice, and charming girl in school just because she is too perfect

Disliking Elain is misogynistic

What happened to feminism? What happened to women supporting women? What happened to she can say no? All of that disappears the second you force Elain to be with Lucien

Elain antis are misogynistic

All Eluciens are Elain antis

Antis claiming they’re feminists when in reality they hate on Elain and Feyre but love Nesta

Elain antis are such sore losers. Y’all were that bunch of people who could not get over being rejected from hanging out with the cool kids so y’all are projecting your hatred towards pretty people now to get validation

I don’t get how Elain’s love for gardening equals boring for some people. I’m sorry your misogyny finds traditionally feminine activities boring

Why are you attacking a female? What did Elain do? Where are your feminist voices?

The fandom is misogynistic towards Elain

If people loved Elain they would ship Elriel

If you hate Elain it says a lot about your feelings toward women

If you hate Elain because she has no “development” then you must hate Azriel because otherwise you’re misogynistic

Eluciens are turned off by the idea of a woman that has the autonomy to reject a man for the simple reason that it is her choice

Eluciens are all about feminism and “it’s HER choice” until it comes down to females not wanting a male

Eluciens don’t respect Elain’s feelings when they ship her with someone that was part of her trauma and makes her feel uncomfortable

The way some Elucien shippers completely disregard how uncomfortable Elain is around Lucien is so hilariously not funny. Prioritizing being mates over Elain’s feelings is just regressive

It’s hard as a fan of Elain to see someone ship her with a person who makes her physically uncomfortable to be around. Wouldn’t you want both characters to be happy to be around each other

Imagine if SJM saw all the awful things her “stans” had to say about Elain

It’s true that we know comparatively little about her, but is she really boring or do you just not value stereotypically feminine traits?

So y’all are just gonna tell me you prefer Elucien over Elriel? Even though Lucien treats Elain as if she’s something that belongs to him? The only reason he wants to be with her is because she’s his mate, he doesn’t respect her, doesn’t treat her as his equal, even though that’s what mates should be? He doesn’t bother to look past what’s on the outside to see her for who she is. And Elain is obviously repulsed by the idea that she should belong to anyone or have no choice in who she can be with. Azriel is her friend and the only person who sees her quiet strength. He has so much faith in her, in her abilities; he’s the one who kept her company when no one else did, he’s the only one who bothered to see her for more than her brokenness. You’re going to tell me you still prefer Elucien over Elriel?

The more I see Gwynriels that ship Elucien out of their hate for Elain, the less I can understand Elain stans that ship Elucien. Pls Elain has made it very clear that she doesn’t want Lucien, why would you ship her with him? Do you hate her too? Smh

The real question would be, if you care and understand Elain why would you ship her with Lucien (where she canonically shrinks when he is near)?

People crying over Helion and Lucien’s mom not getting to be with each other and her being forced into a relationship she didn’t want, but also ship Elucien? Just say you hate Elain

When Elain’s book is out, Gwyn stans will look like clowns and I will laugh because they set her up by shipping her with Azriel just because they hate Elain. Watch them play the victims now because Elriels are clapping back the hate they’ve sent towards Elain

As romantic as wanting girl who is visibly uncomfortable around a guy who caused her trauma to end up with the said guy. Guess their standards for romance are in hell

Category 2: Victimize Elain’s character

Gwynriels only want Gwyn with Azriel because they despise Elain

Gwyn stans and Gwynriels are Elain antis

No one in the books dislike Elain, so why are there so many people who do?

Elain hasn’t done anything wrong or questionable to warrant the hate she gets

Not having Elain’s POV makes it easy for people to be swayed a certain way about her character if you already don’t relate to her in some way

It’s been years since this series came out and we haven’t gotten a lick of an Elain POV, but people still hate her for what? We don’t know her thoughts, dreams, or aspirations

We haven’t even had Elain’s perspective yet and people are passing these judgments off on her

Elain antis who say she’s boring are just cruel when she has obvious symptoms of PTSD like Feyre and Nesta

Gwyn is one of the most overhyped characters and that’s only because most people hate Elain and they couldn’t wait to find a random girl to ship Azriel with

Nesta was abusive to her sisters but Elain (who has only ever been kind) is painted as the villain

From the text we know that Elain is the epitome of feminine stereotypes (gentle, gardening, baking, non confrontational for the most part). Yet people still call her boring or deny that she has any interesting character traits?

You can’t love Nesta and hate Elain

People hate Elain because of internalized misogyny and lack of taste. All the girl does is tend to her garden and mind her business and they treat her worse than Tamlin

Does Gwyn deserve all this support? Of course yes! She is amazing! But where’s that support when Elain was in the same situation as she? Where’s that support for her right now? Why do they idolize Gwyn for her interactions with Azriel and hate Elain for having any interaction with him?

It’s not even a ship war anymore, they just hate Elain

People hate Elain for no reason

Some of y’all don’t like feminine traits and it shows

We know less about Eris and Helion but people don’t call them boring. Why would rejecting femininity make Elain more interesting?

Elain has had a lot forced upon her

The main reason I believe most people love Gwyn so much is to get Azriel away from Elain. It’s not a secret that Elain has been a widely hated character for years so suddenly we get a new female who has a minimal amount of interactions with Azriel and BOOM. New ship that once again doesn’t make sense (just like Azriel x Emerie after ACOFAS)

Elain hasn’t done something so terrible for her to get this hate. At this point some of you are just being misogynistic and you don’t want to accept it. Don’t call yourselves feminists and then say bs like this, it’s embarrassing. She’s pretty and everyone agreed to hate on her

Just a personal feeling, but I feel like a lot of the Elain hate stems from internalized misogyny. That to be a strong female lead, you need to pick up a sword and fight. That to be strong, you need to adapt traditionally masculine traits

Elain is feminine. She is beautiful. She loves to bake and garden. She is docile, quiet, observant, and a people-pleaser. All traditionally feminine traits. Yet for some reason, she’s like the worst in these people’s eyes?

I think also maybe a lot of people can’t relate to her femininity? That her being so beautiful and quiet doesn’t allow for the people who dislike her not to self-insert? Most of the hate stems from people not wanting Elain to be with Azriel. It’s mean, but maybe the people who hate Elain literally just can’t self-insert if they have a story and that’s why they’re vehemently against it?

Poor Elain. The Cauldron dealt her a bad deal. Upon emerging as Fae, she is immediately declared by Lucien as his mate, never mind that she was already engaged to a prick. Her love life is not good

It blows my mind how they really think that they can compare all the shit that Elain gets with some dumb jokes about Gwyn on Twitter (and yes, the “hate” towards her started mostly because Elriels are clapping back, it was bound to happen)

I would think of it as anti-feminist with Elain and Lucien because she has consistently stated that she does not want him so if she was forced to embrace the bond that would be taking away her right to have a choice but with Az she feels comfortable around so if they were mates then Elain would be happy and feel safe which again should be the priority for women to feel safe in their relationships with anything and to not be forced into any type of situation aka the mating bond in this

Category 3: Coddle Elain’s character

Elain has value the way she is, in all her domestic girly glory. Not every character has to be badass

We don’t speak of Elain’s flaws frequently because everyone else already speaks badly of her, mainly in an unfair way

There is definitely something deeper going on with Elain but by no means will she ever be evil or any less feminine. That goes against everything we already know about her

It’s ok to critique Elain because she needs growth but y’all keep forgetting the shit her and her sisters went through

The last “bad” thing Elain did in ACOTAR was not help Feyre when they were impoverished and I’m tired of people acting like she’s a terrible character when it was their father’s responsibility. It happened 4 books ago and Feyre has forgiven both Nesta and Elain

Elain’s character and the evil Elain theory are a great example of the trend where people only consider female characters interesting if they reject femininity

We don’t know enough to hate Elain

Many people want Elain to turn evil (which in my opinion seems to come from a place of internalized misogyny)

However we don’t tend to talk about her faults, at least not publicly, as that has been, and still is, done to death, and I--personally, at least--find it much more fun to theorise about potentially interesting aspects of the overall plot, than dwell on negatives

And ultimately, I would be shocked if Elain has a more karmically-charged story than Nesta, considering that Elain’s “wrongs” are so much less severe and bad than Nesta’s, and Elain has already apologized for them (or paid the price in other ways, like through what Graysen did)

I guess I also think Elain has suffered and been punished enough. I hope her story is about finding hope in terrible situations, and learning to love her new life, and choosing her own path after everything that has been done to her. I don’t think she needs to be punished anymore or face any additional trauma

Also, why is she being judged on her decisions as a human at all? Fae are monsters to humans! They enslaved them for thousands of years, and the Wall was erected to keep them out

Like I’m sorry, but think Elain would want to leave her ONLY FAMILY AND FRIENDS for the Spring Court where she has no one because--oh look, lots of flowers!--is the craziest thing I have ever heard

Her sisters are in the Night Court. Her nephew is in the Night Court. Her closest friends (Nuala and Cerridwen) are in the Night Court. Her love interest is in the Night Court. Her extended family is in the Night Court. Her home is in the Night Court

SJM isn’t going to keep two sisters together and split up the third. Especially not keep Feyre and Nesta together and separate Elain. They were either all going to end up in separate places, or together. Not 2 here and 1 there

Compared to the other female characters in the series, Elain is the only character whose femalehood is at the center of conversations; this is because arguments in the Elriel fandom fixate on it when discussing her character. While Elain, Feyre, Nesta, and Mor are all representations of white womanhood and white beauty, Elain epitomizes the most fragile version of white womanhood. It’s easy to blame society’s perception of traditional female characters in comparison to non-traditional female characters when it comes to the discourse surrounding Elain’s character because it: falls in line with the fixation on Elain’s femalehood to silence opposing viewpoints; is a simplistic explanation that fails to tackle the underlying issues with Elain as a character, the same issues that are downplayed in-universe; absolves Elain of her wrongdoings; prevents the ACOTAR fandom from holding Elain accountable for her actions and inactions within the series; and diminishes the impact Elain’s actions and inactions have on those around her. It’s not that Elain is hated in the fandom because she’s a traditional female character; it’s the fact that arguments in the Elriel fandom deflect a critical analysis of Elain’s character because she’s a traditional female character who embodies the ideal white woman in need of protection. White fans and white-aligned fans of color, especially white women, have a tendency to vehemently defend, gatekeep, and coddle white female characters in fandom; this makes it difficult for other fans to engage in critical discussions about these white female characters because they’re viewed as flawless and all around perfect characters despite evidence to the contrary. Since Elain is viewed positively by the other characters in the series, it has rendered her character untouchable to any perceived slight or criticism in fandom discussions because those negative opinions challenge what has been said about her character thus far. And as a result, her character has been placed on a pedestal and implicitly hailed as the epitome of white womanhood; and when she’s criticized, it’s seen as a direct attack against white womanhood. Arguments in the Elriel fandom: exploit feminist language and perpetuate white feminist tactics under the guise of defending Elain’s character; center Elain in conversations about female oppression in the ACOTAR world and uphold white feminist ideologies in their critique of ACOTAR’s patriarchal society; and use the fragile white woman narrative to victimize Elain in Lucien’s presence, playing into racial biases that are associated with white supremacy’s defense of white womanhood.

Feminism is a social movement that seeks to promote equality and equity to all genders, and feminists work toward eradicating gender disparities on a macro-level, in addition to challenging gender biases on a micro-level. As feminism became more mainstream, a flat and oversimplified version of feminism emerged: mainstream feminism. The mainstream feminist movement is meant to represent all women, but rarely does it center conversations around issues that concern most women. The problem with mainstream feminism is that it’s just a popularized version of white feminism. White feminism has relied extensively on an individualized understanding of women’s oppression, exclusively from the lens of privileged white women. White feminism only focuses on the oppression experienced by white, able-bodied, affluent, educated, cishet women; and it views gender as the key mode of privileged white women’s oppression, isolated from the privileges granted by their other social identities. White women can be and are oppressed under the patriarchy but only because they are women; their identity as women does not exempt them from the privileges granted by their whiteness. The term white feminist does not mean any feminist who is white, but refers to feminists who prioritize the concerns of privileged white women as though they are representative of all women. However, the term is not exclusive to white people. Because white feminism is so pervasive, people of other racial and ethnic backgrounds often buy into white feminism, believing that if they work hard enough, they may be able to reap its rewards.

Just like white feminism, mainstream feminism only recognizes the identity of being a woman, assumes that all women share common experiences of gender oppression, fails to address other social identities in relation to overlapping systems of oppression, and disregards privilege in relation to various social identities. Just like white feminism, mainstream feminism is palatable because it doesn’t seek to challenge the systems in place, instead its goal is to succeed within them. Essentially, mainstream feminism and white feminism are extensions of performative feminism. Performative feminism is a type of performative activism that’s used to describe feminist views that are surface level and solely for the benefit of one type of person. It’s a pretense which often has nothing to do with genuine activism. Arguments in the Elriel fandom normalize and promote performative feminism because the topic of feminism is only referenced when discussing Elain. This indicates that these arguments are engaging in disingenuous discourse to push a personal agenda within the ACOTAR fandom, and it becomes more apparent when they use white feminist tactics to shut down opposing viewpoints:

White feminists weaponize and exploit feminist language to silence the opinions of other women, especially when they’re called out for their problematic behaviors

White feminists use the phrase “Women supporting women” to defend other white feminists who exhibit problematic behaviors instead of holding them accountable 

White feminists weaponize phrases like “Women supporting women” and “You just hate women” to attack other women who disagree with them on any given topic

White feminists use phrases like “All women face challenges” and “Stop pitting women against each other” to sidestep conversations about privilege

White feminists divert conversations away from privilege and towards the Trauma Olympics to equate their struggles to the oppression of marginalized people 

White feminists skirt around the realities of other forms of oppression and discrimination, downplaying the experiences of marginalized people

White feminists diminish or ignore the ways in which gender oppression affects other marginalized people

White feminists paint those they harmed as aggressive, mean, or divisive when confronted with the ways they have harmed a marginalized group

White feminists deflect criticism by focusing on the anger or emotions being expressed rather than the issue that is being discussed, invalidating the concerns of marginalized people

White feminists speak over marginalized voices in an attempt to sound “woke”

White feminists get defensive and insist there’s no way they could be a part of the problem because of what they’ve done to help marginalized groups already 

White feminists say they don’t see color in an attempt to obscure racial issues that need to be addressed

White feminists center and victimize themselves in conversations about racism, which derails necessary conversations from taking place

White feminists who are white weaponize the intersectionality of their race and gender to avoid accountability

Feminism is not meant to be approached from an individualistic perspective nor is it only about addressing the experiences of privileged white women, it involves addressing the intersections of race, class, gender, sexuality, (dis)ability, and other social identities as well; and it involves addressing how these social identities relate to privilege. Moreover, feminism is not about women upholding complete loyalty to other women because of a shared gender identity, and to claim that it does implies that women should be held to different emotional standards than men. If men are able to dislike and criticize other individual men, real or fictional, without their characters being compromised, why aren’t women granted that same privilege?

It’s clear that SJM set up the ACOTAR world to mirror a patriarchal society, and that the imbalance of power between males and females stems from sexism. Arguments in the Elriel fandom analyze the ACOTAR world through a feminist lens to show how ACOTAR’s patriarchal society, to which the mating bond is innately tied, contributes to female oppression and limits their agency. When choice and free will are emphasized as part of Elain’s arc, they imply that Elain, through the mating bond, experiences female oppression under ACOTAR’s patriarchal society because of her identity as a female with that identity being the focal point of her oppression in the world. Elain is one of the most privileged characters in the ACOTAR world: she’s High Fae; she’s the sister of the High Lord and High Lady of the Night Court, which gives her access to wealth and political influence because of that connection; she’s able-bodied; she was magically blessed by the Cauldron; and she lives in Velaris, a place that grants females autonomy and power because of the beliefs of Rhysand and Feyre. Arguments in the Elriel fandom trivialize female oppression in the ACOTAR world because they disregard the fact that Elain’s privileges prevent her from experiencing female oppression in the same way that other marginalized females in the world do. The mating bond being one such example because those around Elain are not forcing the bond on her, instead they’re allowing Elain to reach a decision about the bond for herself; a privilege that other marginalized females in the world probably wouldn’t have. Just because Elain has endured hardships in her life and is a female in a patriarchal society, they do not erase the privileges she holds within the ACOTAR world. The failure to include Elain’s privileges in discussions about Elain being a female in a patriarchal society feeds into white feminist ideologies because white feminism operates from a very narrow perspective; it doesn’t take other intersecting identities into account when it examines gender oppression, leaving no room for discussions about privilege (or lack thereof) in relation to those intersecting identities. When discussing oppression in hierarchical societies, it’s imperative that privilege is also included in the conversation because privilege and oppression are not mutually exclusive; they equally affect the ways in which people navigate those societies through their social identities.

Rather than attributing Elain’s uncomfortability to her new life as a Fae female or the mating bond itself and her trauma to the Cauldron, the King of Hybern, or Ianthe, they’re placed on Lucien to cast his character in a negative light. Moreover, fandom discussions portray Lucien as a possessive character to further emphasize Elain’s discomfort despite the inaccuracy of this characterization in canon. Arguments in the Elriel fandom play into racial biases when it comes to Lucien (a male character of color) because they mischaracterize his character in order to victimize Elain (a white female character), placing her character in the role of the white damsel in distress. In Western society, the concept of womanhood has been conceptualized from a Eurocentric perspective with femininity and feminine attributes favoring white women. It’s the idea that a certain type of femininity is only inherent to white women as they are seen as the embodiment of an ideal womanhood. White womanhood has been a symbol of innocence and purity, and white women have been viewed as fragile beings in need of protection. The reason white womanhood functions within white supremacy is because it’s the same idea that has motivated white men to kill and beat black and brown men. The so-called protection of white women has been used as a justification for the horrific violence committed by white men because black and brown men were stereotyped as aggressive and seen as a threat to the virtue of white women. The white damsel in distress trope considered white women as worthy of protection because of their perceived innocence and purity; women of color were not granted that same treatment because they did not fit into the ideal image of womanhood. Over the years, this trope became a means for white women to exercise limited power in a patriarchal society with white women weaponizing their status as the damsel much to the detriment of black and brown men. It’s through the white damsel in distress trope that white supremacy sustains its dominance in Western society. The misrepresentation of characters of color in fandom, the dismissal of their importance to the overall story, and using them as tools in arguments centered around white characters are the foundation of fandom racism; they’re examples of how racism moves silently in fandom spaces. Instead of examining their behavior and taking constructive criticism from fans of color, white fans will often double down on their bigotry and center their uncomfortability in the conversation when confronted with their complicity in fandom racism. White fans expect fans of color to swallow fandom racism in its many forms in order to not ruin the experience of fandom, dismissing the fact that racism is prevalent in nearly every aspect of society. This mentality ensures that no one is held accountable for the harm they caused and alienates fans of color in fandom spaces.

To reiterate what I mentioned in my first think piece: terms like “oppression”, “the right to choose”, “feminist”, “feminism”, “anti-feminist”, “anti-feminism”, “internalized misogyny”, “misogyny”, “misogynist”, “sexist”, “sexism”, “racist”, “racism”, “classist”, “classism”, “discrimination”, and “patriarchy” are all used in specific ways to draw attention to the plight of marginalized people and challenge those who deny the existence of systems of oppression. Yet these words and their meanings can be twisted to attack, exclude, and invalidate people with differing opinions on any given topic. When social justice and feminist terms are thrown around antagonistically and carelessly to push a personal agenda, it becomes clear that these terms are being used to engage in disingenuous discourse and pursue personal validation rather than being used out of any deep-seated conviction to dismantle systemic oppression. Being an ally, activist, or feminist is not an identity, it’s a practice. It requires: ongoing self-reflection; holding ourselves accountable; listening to marginalized people; educating ourselves; dismantling implicit biases; challenging those around us who are exhibiting problematic behaviors; and action behind our words.

It’s important to be aware of the language that is used within the fandom when defending or critiquing characters and ships. It’s also important to question how an argument is framed and why it’s framed the way that it is to critically examine the intent behind that argument: is it used as a tool to push a personal agenda that reinforces problematic behaviors, or is it used as an opportunity to share, learn, enlighten, and educate?

-----------

Tagging: @spell-cleavers @bookofmirth @m0bulidae @ilya-boltagon

[pynkhues]

Hi. I'm a bit confused about the hate Beth is getting for not choosing Rio over her kids' future. She can't print money and boland bubbles is shut down, so she's broke once again, with no income or way to pay her mortgage. What secret service is offering her is going to give her family a fresh start. Yes, Dean as well, but it's about the kids for her. And if she chooses Rio there's no guarantee that she'll get anything out if it. She has no reason to be loyal to him at the moment. Am I getting something wrong here? Because I don't get it how she could make any other choice at this moment.

Hi! SO I’m bundling these two asks together because I think that my answer to them is ultimately the same, and it’s been an answer I’ve been thinking about really since the first half of season 2 when I noticed some of the louder opinions on Beth change within the fandom, specifically here on tumblr, but also on other platforms. I’ve debated talking about it at all publicly because I know it’s an opinion that will probably upset some people, but I guess we’re here now, haha, and I’ve been sitting on it for two years, so.

I agree with both of you, and in particular the latter (I’m sorry it took me so long to reply!) There was a reason I logged off pretty quickly after the 4.03 promo dropped and went and did some gardening instead.

Look, I think this fandom, like every fandom, has a problem with misogyny and I think that that is steeped not only in y’know, generations of institutional, social and narrative patriarchy, but a fundamental lack of empathy extended to women.

I think we’ve seen this misogyny manifest in a range of different ways in this particular fandom. I think the generational misogyny has been particularly loud to me personally, where progressive young women apply today’s standards and resources to a woman in her mid-forties, failing to take into account not only her unstable childhood background which has been inferred since season 2, even if we did only get the confirmation of it in 4.03, but the lack of resources (i.e. the internet), education, and social support systems that would’ve been available to her at certain points in her life.

This is not directly relevant to Good Girls, but a point I often come back to with generational misogyny is that marital rape only became illegal in 1993 in the US. As much as we’re in challenging times right now, feminism particularly around and within marriage has changed a lot over the last 30 years, and Beth and Dean’s marriage is one that holds to a lot of old tenets that have been, and still are being, challenged in the process of that.

I’ve seen this sort of misogyny and sexism manifest in other ways too – simple things like Beth’s wardrobe, and the idea she has to look a certain way to be not only appealing to the men in the show, but to us as an audience. People have criticised her parenting and her relationship with her children as if there’s only one right way to be a mother; the choices she makes to try and survive, which are frequently the only choices she has as you identified, anon, and especially criticised her not prioritising the man she’s boned twice over herself and her family and those she loves the most. I’ve seen the latter in particular evolve into this desire to see Beth punished, and frequently seen that written into some people’s fics in a way that honestly gives me pause.

The point of this post isn’t to say that Beth is a perfect person who shouldn’t receive criticism, she should, and you can also feel very frustrated by her. I do all the time! She’s a frustrating character who’s done terrible, toxic things on this show, but doing those things does not remove her right to empathy. I think that criticism without thought, without context, without understanding, without empathy is something I will always think is, quite frankly, shallow at best and cruel at worst.

Beth is, of course, a fictional character, but fiction is what helps us to realise our prejudices. I know watching the show and reading criticism has certainly made me look at things I’d internalised and maybe thought of less in the past – particularly around issues like nuance and race in storytelling. I can own that! And I’m glad to be challenged and to listen and learn and grow. I just wish perhaps people would also be more thoughtful of how they think about women in this show too, because some of the language, the shaming, the vitriol, the sheer hunger for punishment is reflective to me of a much deeper-rooted problem.

I want to leave you with a quote from Andrea Dworkin who was a radical feminist (and trans ally!) in the 1970s through 1990s, because it’s one I think about a lot.

“Women are perceived to be appalling failures when we are sad. Women are pathetic when we are angry. Women are ridiculous when we are militant. Women are unpleasant when we are bitter, no matter what the cause. Women are deranged when women want justice. Women are man-haters when women want accountability and respect from men.”

[chibimyumi]

Hi, I hope you're doing well and staying healthy. I've read your post about how Elizabeth attacking ciel is sexism. What about Sebastian getting bully by Frances? Frances is a noblewoman grabbing a servant's hair in front of other people. And fans (including me) are like: oh! What a lioness! Even the devil himself is terrified of her! what if it was the other way around? The idea of a nobleman grabbing a governess's hair calling her nasty and indecent makes me uncomfortable and even angry.

【Response to post: Sexism against men and Kuro Sexist jokes】

Dear Anon,

I’m doing well, thank you very much. I hope you too ^^

Your question is a very good one, and it really had me thinking for a while! I myself admittedly do laugh very hard at Sebastian getting a hard time from Frances. But indeed, like you said, it is still bullying, and bullying is bad. In this post-feminist era, we have been so trained to see women bullying men as ‘funny’ or ‘empowering’, but women getting bullied as unambiguously bad instinctively, that sometimes we forget to check our double standards.

Feelings are feelings, we can’t help what we feel. But how come then that to many of us, Frances bullying Sebas is so funny, but Lizzie almost murdering O!Ciel and Nina bullying men not? This post is merely an attempt to explain this feeling for myself too, but hopefully we can all reach SOME explanation together as well???

Let us first look at in what ways Frances has been making Sebastian’s life hard. From all the interactions we have of these two so far, her main points of criticism seem to be his hair and his lack of professionalism.

Slovenly Hair

Sebastian’s hair is something we’ve gotten quite used to now after more than14 years. In Sebastian’s time however, his hair really would have been the height of impropriety for his profession.

Just like I translated O!Ciel’s looks to 2020 standards, I quickly translated Sebas’ hair to 2020 standards as well. Very clean, innit?! Very professional, innit?!

Even without the translation however, if we look at the worst of wigs from the Kuromyus, we can also see how Sebastian’s hair would be atrocious in any formal setting. Look past the fact that these actors are supposed to represent a drawn character. Just imagine being in a fancy restaurant and encountering a dead-spider feather duster on your waiter’s head.... erm....???

Something that is objectively bad on Frances’ end however, is that chapter 14 is not the first time that Frances has seen his ‘slovenly hair’. If his hair really is so unacceptable, as an authority figure Frances has the right to say something about it. However, as it seems, until this point she has never communicated at all (no, “hinting” is not the same as communicating), so Sebas had no way of knowing what he “did wrong”. She immediately grabbed for Sebastian’s hair without mercy, probably because her crept up frustration got the better of her. This is indeed entirely too harsh for a first time call-out, and entirely on Frances.

Much later in the story Frances criticises and touches Sebastian’s hair again, and this time in public while he was infiltrating as a teacher. Here Frances is even publically humiliating Sebastian in front of his students and other high ranking guests.

Especially when you keep in mind that Frances is a noblewoman and Sebas a mere servant, Frances is indeed abusing her power against a servant who cannot strike back at all.

This is indeed power play. However, though it does not justify anything, in the very least her criticism does have ground; Sebas’ hair is by all measures inadequate for any professional setting. Just be nicer about it, Frances.

Useless Butler

Now, let us look at the other reason Frances disapproves of Sebas. Sebastian is a very competent butler according to most people. To Frances however, this claim is empty. When she arrives, parts of the estate have been destroyed and something very literally exploded in her presence.

Even though Sebas is not the person actively causing the explosion or the destruction, as the senior servant of the household, it is literally his job to manage the other servants. So yes, here too, the fact that things can be destroyed in the household because he either hired inadequate staff or because he mismanages his household, DOES INDEED prove he fails at his job. As the aunt of O!Ciel who cares about her nephew AND her paternal home, Frances is in her right to be concerned and call Sebastian out for NOT doing his job.

In chapter 14, Sebastian’s schedule was all over the place and kept changing the plans for Frances. It is no wonder that she would be quite annoyed and doubt Sebastian’s adequateness. When you know your 13 year old nephew’s household is in the hands of somebody so apparently inadequate, anybody would probably be concerned. However annoyed though, Frances does not overstep any boundaries about this specific issue; she is simply supremely unimpressed. Fair enough?

Compliments where due

Something that is quite interesting though, is that despite disapproving of Sebastian, Frances does also know when to compliment him when due. After Sebastian has saved Lizzie’s life without boasting, Frances recognised how the butler does indeed have some value and the correct attitude as a servant.

She says “though you look indecent what you say is true,” and it is yet another jab at the demon’s expense. But here she is also showing that she is willing to acknowledge somebody’s achievements, looking past appearances.

Before Frances leaves, Frances jabs at Sebas a bit again, but she really is not doing anything dickish this time. Instead of making Sebas think she’s simply chosen him as target to be a prick towards, she concretely states why she doubts his professionalism. She mentions the smashed tea set, bare garden and burnt food; mistakes that are objectively unacceptable. Instead of yelling at him, she actually gives him constructive criticism. So here too, Frances is quite stern, but her grounds are solid.

In the Campania arc Sebas shows up again with the hair Frances disapproved of. Frances clearly wants to do something about it again because in her eyes, the butler simply won’t learn. But given the circumstances and Sebastian’s proven usefulness, Frances actually does shelve her agenda. Just like above, here too Frances shows that she is capable of acknowledging somebody despite their looks.

Later when the zombies dramatically outnumbered the living humans, Frances sends Sebas - who had come to her aid - back to her daughter and nephew. By sending Sebas back, Frances also shows that she in fact trusts this ‘slovenly butler’ with the lives of two children she loves deeply. Sebastian protests, but Frances immediately replies: “don’t you trust our ability as swordsmen?” Here what Frances is functionally saying is: “I trust you with your abilities, so you can trust us back.”

In short, Frances is harsh and doing power-play against a servant, but she can shelve her agenda, and does acknowledge Sebas when due.

Contrast to Nina and Lizzie

So now we have seen how Frances bullies Sebastian, and her motivation behind all her points of harshness. As we have seen, Frances’ only points of criticisms are concrete ones; Sebastian’s lack of professionalism in looks, and his lack of professionalism in management. She goes about them too harshly, but all points are legit criticisms, and something Sebas CAN and probably SHOULD work to improve.

Nina

This is in stark contrast with the way Nina bullies her victims. As far as we have seen, none of Nina’s victims have offended her in any way, nor does she ever give any concrete criticism. She has just decided that because men are men, they don’t deserve proper treatment. Even when providing clothes for men is literally part her job, she refuses to provide the ‘professional service’ she is being paid for. And because she is AN EMANCIPATED LESBIAN!!!!!!! #FEMINISM, it’s FINE (!?!?!?)

Unlike with Frances’ criticism of Sebastian’s inadequate hairdo and managing, being ‘men’ is not something any of these men can do anything about (except Sebas, but Nina doesn’t know). Bullying is always wrong, always low. But it’s EVEN lower when you bully somebody for who they are, and not what they do wrong. What does not help is that Nina seems to only be capable of treating people nicely if they happen to be sexuality-wise compatible with her... but if you are, you’ll get molested. What is wrong with you, Nina????

Yes, Frances is saying: “you are a man, and yet your fringe is so long”. So on the most surface level, it is a woman saying this to a man because he is a man. As we later get to know Frances a bit better though, she would be harsh to anybody who looks slovenly. She just has different hairstyles which she considers appropriate for men and women respectively. Had Sebas been a woman and his hair was the ‘feminine equivalent of slovenly’, Frances would most likely have acted exactly the same. So in this sense, unlike with the jokes using Nina and Lizzie, it is not purely: “Haha, girl bullies boii, lol.”

Something else that is terrible is that what Nina does seems to be systemic. Logically it checks out too; it can’t be that only since the past few weeks she’s decided only women and young boys deserve her kind treatment. For all we know, Nina’s been treating the male Phantomhive staff like this for 2-3 years. Sebastian’s comment about Nina thoroughly ignoring men again with “as always” further supports this theory.

With Frances in contrast, in chapter 14 (so barely a year ago in story time), Sebas seemed to have no clue whatsoever about Frances’ terrors. Sebas announced Frances’ arrival to his master and is very calm about it. It was not until O!Ciel alerted Sebas about his aunt that anybody even guessed what hurricane was headed for them. As such, we can safely conclude that Sebas had only been subjected to Frances’ criticism a couple of times, unlike having had to bear with Nina for years.

Yes, Frances still should have communicated, but I already addressed the details above. Still, the point remains that even though Frances is overstepping boundaries and abusing her power, her criticisms are at least not empty.

Lizzie

Lizzie too just like Nina, had zero grounds for showing that much aggression. She did not give anybody the benefit of the doubt, did not communicate, or even so much as give O!Ciel any chance to explain the situation. So far O!Ciel has given Lizzie no reason to think he’d cheat on her, and yet she hurled so much aggression at him Sebas had to intervene.

Still, Lizzie is marginally better than Nina because she is not systemically bullying O!Ciel. It is a one time event. However, this one makes me more annoyed with Yana because it means that even Yana had to use this stale, stale trope of “LOVE TRIANGLE COMEDYYYY”. Have I ever mentioned how MUCH I hate love triangles and jealousy???

Conclusion

Feeling wise, the most important reason for why Sebas being bullied by Frances is funny is probably because of who Sebas is. Sebas is otherwise an all-powerful demon, but to see him inventing colours to shit at Frances - a human Sebas could crush between his fingertips like a cookie - is just hilarious. Had Sebas been a human though, I would not have laughed so hard personally.

Rationally however, Frances is doing power play against a servant who cannot talk back, so it is still bullying, and bullying is inexcusable.The only bit of “right” Frances has is that she does not seem to be systemically bullying Sebastian, and that her criticisms have some ground.

So if Nina and Lizzie’s behaviours played for jokes are like... a -7 and -9 respectively, Frances’ at least scores a -2 for me?

(Yes, as we’re talking about bullying anyway, I just have to make a jab at Vincent.)

Afterword

Something not really related to why “Frances:Bad”, “Nina-Lizzie:Worse”, but I do wish to mention is Yana’s improved drawing skills. I have no proof, but I think it MIGHT have been where this Frances-joke originated.

Yana’s time in the more traditional mindset of manga-worldview really showed, especially at the far beginning. Besides, she was still in the process of finding a way to draw handsome men. In the more traditional mindset of the early 2000s, handsome men were just not supposed to have slicked back hair - “that was reserved for old men and nasty dudes!!” Yana’s discomfort with drawing handsome men with slicked back hair was clearly visible in Sebastian’s early appearances, and making the ‘”hair, back!!! says old-fashioned lady” was potentially even a way of Yana to laugh at herself.

I don’t know who else is old like me and grew up with 80s to early 00s manga, but at the time, hair for handsome men was a BIG deal. In that world ‘slicked back hair’ just carried a certain laughability about it; a “rule of not-cool”. To me at least at the time this ‘laughability’ really resonated with me, and Yana probably also trusted this same ‘unspoken rule’ to resonate with her audiences.

Much later though, Yana clearly grew more comfortable and  maybe even fond of slicked back hairstyles as she confidently chose to portray Sebas as ‘appealing’ while wearing his hair in the style Yana previously disliked.

Again, I have no proof, but I can’t help but think that if Kuro had started 10 years later, the running gag revolving Frances might look altogether different.

What do you guys think? ^^ Cheers, and stay healthy!

Character analysis Nina Hopkins

Character analysis Vincent Phantomhive

Sexism against men and Kuro’s sexist jokes

MASTERPOST Gender in Kuroshitsuji

MASTERPOST Analyses & Info

[sometimesrosy]

what now? idk

TBH, I don’t really know what to do with this blog now that The 100 is over. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad it’s over, but I feel like just posting kitties and cool photo posts isn’t a good use of this spot. 

I really liked answering asks about the show and other stuff, and I kind of miss that, but not having the community makes it harder... even though I was unhappy with fandom for the last couple of years. 

What should I put on this blog? What would you guys like to see, if there’s still anyone out there? 

Let me tell you a bit of what I’m doing outside of tumblr or fandom or scifi.

Professionally, I’m ghostwriting contemporary romances. I’ve written about about 18 so far, in a couple of years. It’s hard work, it doesn’t pay real well. I can’t really suggest to other people, but it just manages to keep my head above water and I get to stay home and take care of myself and homeschool and write and be creative.

Reading wise, I’m leaning hard into the historical romances, and have been ever since I started ghostwriting. IDK why. I read one and write the other.

Writing wise, I am not getting very far on my science fiction books that I’m writing, nor am I getting far on querying for an agent for my finished novels. I’ve got Moonshine, which is based on a bellarke fic I wrote quite a few years ago, and then they’re Girl Of Freaks, which is a contemporary fantasy inspired by how annoyed twilight made me. Like. That’s not what vampires would be. Ugh. Whatever. That’s two finished novels I have that are ready for publication and me, having problems with querying and publication and staying on task. (sometimes I wonder if I too am ADHD after researching for my son’s ADHD. I have been doing a little poetry, too, although that kind of slowed down in the pandemic. It seems to be picking up now that we have a decent not terrifying president. I think I was too anxious to get my thoughts together to write poetry, which was disappointing because I was really getting into poetry.

I am ALSO homeschooling my two teens. One of whom is on the autism spectrum and has ADHD, etc, and one of whom wants to raise chickens. They’re 14 and 15.  He’s older. We’re reading greek mythology write now and writing essays. He writes about philosophy and psychology, and she writes persuasive essays about how we should have Disney+ and have chickens. 

That goes along with the gardening we’re doing. It’s a school project, but we’re also gardening for fun and health. so. We’re trying blueberries and green beans and spinach and herbs and tomatoes and ginger. 

Then I’m getting back into art, too. I took on a challenge on instagram to do 100 days of creativity. I don’t really know WHAT I’m going to do, but it’s essentially 100 days of art journaling as I rediscover what the hell I have to say as an artist. I’ve been doing so much writing that is where my energy goes. 

I am also working on an e-course about Writer’s Block. It’s specifically for writers, because I’ll be showing some writing hints, but a lot of it goes for general creativity. My main thesis is that writer’s block shouldn’t terrify us, but really if we pay attention and listen to what’s stopping us, we can actually learn about our own writing process and become better and happier writers. It’s turned out to be MUCH larger than I thought, a whole book, I suppose, rather than one e course, so I’ve broken it down into four courses, and I’m doing the first one on Overwhelm, which is self explanatory. The other three are; Fear (the internal demons that stop you,) The Narrative Itself (because your subconscious knows there’s a problem with the story itself,) and Not A Block, But a Fallow Period (in which you listen to yourself and DON’T write for a while.)

I suppose I’m also doing the health thing. I have hashimotos, which is basically why I was so sick for most of my time here and could barely get out of bed. Because of that, I’m eating gluten free and mostly natural, although ice cream and dark chocolate doesn’t seem to do any harm to me. So that means I’m also doing a lot of cooking, because processed food always seems to make me sick. Fun. On top of that I’m doing some easy going Yin yoga, or restorative IDK exactly what kind it is, but it’s mainly to manage pain and stay flexible after writing all day in a chair. 

So why post this? 

Because I guess I want to know if I should be posting stuff from my real life? Before, almost everything I posted was a response to an ask that someone sent me, so my entire blog was reader driven. Now I don’t really have that anymore, so it’s hard to know what anyone wants to hear, especially since I’m not doing that deep dive analysis into fandom or really any content. Any analysis I do is going to be impressions, or initial thoughts, not a dissertation like before. (It’s healthier for me that way.) 

So the question is, what do y’all want to hear about? Posts on homeschooling? Why? Most of you aren’t doing that? Do you want to talk to me about the historical romance books I’m reading? I could do that, but they can blur together, especially at the speed I read them. And because I reread the ones I really like a lot. I can’t really tell you about the books I’m ghostwriting since I signed a contract not to blab. They’re fun, I think. But you know. 

I could post my art work, idk. Not all of it is good. A lot of it is just about discovery. I could post poetry. I still haven’t figured out how to format poetry on this weird website. IDK maybe screenshots. I could post what’s happening in the garden. I could write about my ecourse and about writer’s block. Which I don’t have, obviously, since I am writing 3k words a day ghostwriting-- except I DO have it, every day. But I’ve managed coping strategies to work with it. I’m actually using it to deal with my struggles doing the e course. Listen this is how I get words on the page. 

I mean I post a lot of this stuff already on instagram instagram   https://www.instagram.com/rowenamurillo/ and on twitter   https://twitter.com/rosymamacita1 I’m mostly doing writer twitter, some romancelandia, some politics and feminism a touch of tv and movies. 

[dollsome-does-tumblr]

Vote blue to save the Affordable Care Act!

(I posted this on FB awhile ago and figured I should put it over here, too, where I’ve got way more people actually paying attention!)

I'm just gonna take a minute to talk about some of the benefits of the ACA that everybody might not be familiar with, since I have spent a lot of my time finding out more about it and, as one of the Perpetually Sickly Like Colin From The Secret Garden Before He Discovered Getting Out of Bed And Going Outside, I am very passionate about affordable healthcare and the ways in which the ACA has helped us take steps in that direction (though obviously there's still way further to go). This is the stuff that also applies to your insurance if you've got a plan through work rather than buying a plan through healthcare.gov:

The ACA is what allows kids to stay on their parents' insurance until they turn 26.

It also makes preventative care free, so you should have one doctor's appointment a year where you don't have to pay anything, as well as the tests, etc., done at that doctor's appointment, if applicable. (Apparently this also applies to maternity & newborn care, though I am not personally familiar with this.) The idea behind this is to help prevent health problems from getting out of control due to not getting regular health care. I’m not sure how many people are aware of this: you are legally entitled to that one free check-up a year if you have insurance!

It protects pre-existing conditions, as well as stopping your insurance company from refusing to pay anymore once you meet a certain amount of expenses, a.k.a. your lifetime limit (which is especially important for severe, long-lasting illnesses or issues).

It makes birth control (generic brand combo & mini pill, IUDs and implants, etc., as well as -- I believe -- tubal ligation) free if you've got insurance. A wonderful step for feminism in this country!!!

It makes insurers cover dental and vision for kids under 19.

It makes it required for insurance to cover at least one brand/type of every category of drug.

It makes out-of-pocket drug expenses count toward your overall deductible, rather than having a separate deductible for prescriptions. (This one in particular has helped me A LOT and I love it.)

It expands coverage for mental health services.

It makes emergency room services and hospital stays more affordable.

And I'm sure a bunch of other stuff I haven't thought of! Go Googling! Read up on it! (But make sure to consider the validity of your sources.) My apologies if any of the information above is a bit inaccurate: I wrote this post mostly from memory, though I did double-check each list item as I added it. I don’t have any professional expertise or anything on this topic; I’ve just learned a lot from applying for and using my healthcare plans over the past handful of years.

Biden has a plan to keep working on the ACA to make it more beneficial and affordable to more people, especially focusing on vastly expanding the amount of people who qualify for a monthly subsidy to pay the bulk of their premium, which is what has made my insurance affordable for the past six years. His plan also applies the subsidy to the gold plan on healthcare.gov, which covers more services, instead of the silver plan, which is what I've always used. (I've had great luck with the silver plan, but it would be awesome to have an even higher quality plan!) So if you like the sound of Obamacare but it currently hasn't been affordable for you, which I know has historically been an issue if your income isn't pretty low, Biden is planning to address that particular issue in the changes he proposes, as well as working to offer a public option for people who do not want to participate in the health insurance system.

Find out more at: https://joebiden.com/healthcare/

I love the aims of the ACA and am so thankful for many of the benefits it's brought me since I aged out of my parents’ insurance six years ago (because boy, has my body been churning out new health problems as it ages! And there but for the grace of God -- or fabulous genetics, I don't know -- go you. Goes everybody sooner or later, really!). I desperately hope we are able to keep the ACA and make it stronger and better as a step in the eventual direction of universal healthcare in this country. I think that people don't always make the connection that some of the things we've really come to rely on in our healthcare in recent years are because of the ACA, and those important benefits will very likely be lost in a world without it. I think almost all of us are going to feel the pain of that if it comes to pass.

Vote Biden-Harris to protect the ACA!

[iam-kenough]

Will  you ever notice me? Arthur Morgan x Original Female Character

Summary:  During they wandering in deep snowstorm, man from van  der Linde gang found odd looking girl and Dutch decides to take her to  camp to see if she can be any use, leading life of outlaw with them.  Quickly, new girl develops feelings towards Arthur, but he sees her just  as a kid...and she won't take that! It's an original character story  that starts in the place where Arthur, Dutch and Micah were supposed to  first meet with Sadie. Instead she's already with them.  

Authors notes: In this chapter I placed big/small (it’s you to decide) crossover, it doesn’t change the plot but I felt like it would be a good wink to others from Witcher’s fandom. If I could give my OC voice it would be this one from quoted song. It’s another chapter and you can find the rest of chapter on my blog if you want to read more of my fanfiction. I decided to post all parts I have at once so the fic could catch more attention. Words count: 2238 Chapter 7 At first he thought Iris is really gonna wait for him. He was telling himself that she just wanted some space and she moved to let himself think. But then, once, when he was lying in his bed it hit him. She told you that just to make it dumping her easier for you, you old fool. She won't wait for you and you let her go. And this realisation made him cry for brief moment. He just hurt another woman in his life. You stole her first kiss, Arthur Morgan. No, he couldn't sleep now. He was the worst. He walked down the stairs and went to the garden to smoke a cigarette and clean his head. And then he noticed that  under his favourite tree Iris is drawing something in her journal. She was singing too, something that sounded like a lullaby. He decided to listen to her before walking at her like that.

Wolves asleep amidst the trees Bats all a swaying in the breeze But one soul lies anxious wide awake Fearing no manner of ghouls, hags and wraiths For your dolly Polly sleep has flown Don't dare let her tremble alone For the witcher, heartless, cold Paid in coin of gold He comes he'll go leave naught behind But heartache and woe Deep, deep woe

- Nice song - he cleared his throat - but who is  a witcher? Iris's heart jumped right to her throat and so did her arms. She looked at him with the coldest manner she had. - It's a bad guy from a tale about himself. He lives in kings and queens times and he slaughters monsters, like...Ghosts and things like that. No one likes witcher's though. They are scary. - Never heard of it. Sounds interesting. - I can borrow you a book. He's in love with a witch with violet eyes and black hair. Really pretty one. - I am not much of a person who likes books - he laughed and then dragged from cigarette - too stupid for that. - If you say so, Mr Morgan - she closed her journal and got up, cleaning her dress from any grass and sand - Anyway, it's you seat. Sorry for taking it, it's free now. - Wait - he grabbed her wrist. He just didn't know what to do next - you have something in your hair - was all he said, using the most awkward manner to pick ''something'' from her hair and throw it away. - Thank you? - she looked at him rather startled. - I-I actually wanted to talk to you? If you have time. - There isn't much to talk about these days. Only Dutch has a lot to say to me, he keeps talking about Tahiti and mangoes. He's crazy, he doesn't even know where freakin' Tahiti is. - Neither do I, sweetheart. - You don't wanna go there without even bare skills of finding it on world's map, Mr Morgan. - I feel like you change the subject and I really need to talk to you, Iris. She sighed and nodded her head. It was just normal courtesy but he couldn't read thru it and started talking. -  I feel like you avoiding me. - Really now? I'm sorry. - You said you are gonna wait to let me think but then ya don't talk much to me. It's not like I am thinking about it constantly and I'm gonna overheat talking to you at the same time - he rambled. That was bad choice of words. - I am not thinking about you, I-I mean I think about you a lot, b-but not this way...- was all he babbled. It was even worse! - I see you could use some sleep, Mr Morgan. You don't make much sense - Iris patted his arm with the friendlier manner she could force herself to and  she left Arthur faster than the light. He was a fool meant to die alone. Arthur started to write a lot in his journal. Whole pages were covered  with words. If he could only speak so swiftly he would win Iris back already but all he could do was watching her from afar. She stopped taking any jobs that meant being with him, she hunted alone and when she needed help with anything she was asking Dutch straight away, even when Arthur was next to her and Dutch sat in his tent. Iris and Arthur were good friends but now they wasn't even strangers. She actually talked more to Micah than to him. And it hurt but he didn't know what to do when he could speak with Iris. It was his lack of communication. All he could think about was Iris's birthday happening today and he decided to go to the city to buy her a gift. But what would she liked? He had actually this much money that if she liked a boat, he could buy one. But boat didn't seem right. She was strong, yet femine. And smart, she knew a lot. Maybe perfumes? Nah, she smelled good enough for him. Then maybe a book? Arthur gulped while thinking how hard it's gonna be to buy a book for Iris. - Good morning, my birthday girl! - Mary- Beth chirped, trying to wake Iris up - I have something what you gonna like! - More hours of sleep and something to eat? - Yes! Kind of. I bought you cookies. But it's not what I really have. She handed Iris small tissue and girl unfolded it. There was silver pendant inside, with small emerald blinking in sunlight. - It's beautiful! You totally stole it, Mary - Beth! - I totally diid - she sang and cuddled her friend - Isn't that romantic? I steal for you, I mend your heart, soon and we gonna be married. - It actually is quite romantic. And to be honest we are free people. I would marry you. - I know you would, I am sweetest one. Ain't I? Tell me I am! - You are dearest to me, Mary-Beth. And this is absolutely the greatest thing I ever got for birthday. - It matches your eyes~!Arthur was gone for the whole day. He was running from shop to shop. After few hours he choosed one dress, but he also saw a beautiful haircomb, with carved elements and subtle. He wasn't sure for what he should settle and decided it's not gonna be a dress when lady in shop looked at him weirdly because when she asked Arthur for size, he told that he could embrace Iris's waist with his arm. He decided to be braver than usually and decided to enter book shop. - Er, g'day sir -Arthur scratched his chin - Do you have some books for person who likes to study...biology? - Biology, sir? - Well, my wife - he quickly noticed how sweet if would sound if was reall - she enrolled to university and she's gonna be a doctor, she's really smart you know and I wanted buy something...proper. - I think I have something just right for you, sir. It was indeed right.-Mary-Beth! - Iris jumped quickly in her direction and dragged her to nearest bush she saw. Her breath was heavy. - What, what? - Look what I had found - she spoken in with deadly serious manner. And the case was serious. She just noticed Arthur's journal left in his room. - Is it...? - Yes and I know we shouldn't but I don't have any decency - she straightened up proudly - so we gonna read it. And so they opened journal and was searching thru it for any appearance of Iri's name. At first it wasn't anything harmful and Arthur wrote about her as ''kid'' or ''new kid'' but right after what happened between them few days ago they could read something very disturbing. It was almost the worst Iris could imagine. In this note Arthur more or less compared her to Eliza and Marry. - ''She seems so similar to Eliza. She is just more nervous and frivolous. I think that maybe there isn't any more woman with Eliza's calm temper. I keep telling myself it's Eliza's ghost'' - quoted Iris and Mary-Beth squeaked with shock. - Look there ''I kissed her today and it was weird feeling. She doesn't seem to know what to do and with Mary it was easier'' son of a bitch, that's harsh. - He's right, you know. I can't kiss. I've got another one - Iris seemed not to be bothered. Yet. She just was in this adrenaline rush that made her laugh at it - ''She moved away from our room. I thought about it a lot, she's just a liar and she won't be back''. - Aren't you sad, Iris? - Mary-Beth looked at her with worry. She didn't know what she would do if she would read her lovers journal and found things like that. -Sad? Never. I expected him to say things like that. More mad...I feel used. Kind of like he tried me but didn't likt the taste after all. In early evening Arthur got back to camp with a gift covered in some fancy paper and heavy heart pounding in chest like bird in cage. He noticed that everyone is gathered. - Ladies and gentelman - Mary-Beth was standing on the log like she was giving a speech, with beer in her hand and Iris under her arm - Can I talk to all of you for a minute? - I guess you can - Micah said grumpily. - Thank you. As you all probably know it's my girlfriend's birtday today - she cuddled Iris to herself. Girl had big flower crown on her head. It was another gift to cheer her up after what they discovered and Arthur had to say he looked like a pixie or like elve from fairy tale - and thank's to Dutch we have a lot of beer... - Thanks, Dutch - Iris chimed in and sent man a kiss. -...and Mr Pearson cooked today something that doesn't taste awful, I think it was a gift for our birthday girl... Everyone bursted into laugh. Except Pearson. - Ya will starve, missy - he snarled. - ...and I totally stole this necklace for her and don't you think it's romantic? Laughs again. - ...and since I think he can, Dutch will gave us marriage today and we gonna be first married couple here... - I don't think I can - Dutch said humorously and dragged from his cigarette. - I think you will have to, she really wants that - Iris said pretending she's whispering. Mary-Beth cuddled her closer. - And I hope everyone is gonna have fun, thank you very much, woohoo! - She said as she kissed Iris in front of everybody, then their bottles clicked and the fun begin. At first it was mainly girls but later almost everyone joined the party. Beer was cold, night was warm and Iris danced a lot, around the campfire, making pirouettes and laughing sweetely. Beer and fun made her forget. And she couldn't care less.But after few hours man 'round there were too drunk, their hands becoming jazzy and she dissapeared under her favourite tree with journal and pencil. - I was thinking you gonna be there - Arthur appeared from god knows where. He seemed in weirdly good mood and she was drunk enough to handle this conversation with class. - And I am. Not many people are loosers enough to sit and watch how other people party. What's wrong? - I-I have something for you. Really broke my back to find something good enough for you. Happy birthday - he said. She unpacked this heavy something from the paper and she was speechless. It was a botanic atlas with drawings drawed by hand. It was mainly about herbs and how to heal with them. It was piece of art to her. But she had her pride. - Thank you, Mr Morgan - she said and he smiled. But only for a second. - I can't accept this gift - she said briefly, placing the book back in Arthur's hands. - Jesus, what? What is that about? I bought if for you to have it. -It's nothing, really. I just...can't have it. Lost interests in all that - she lied quickly. - You lie - it was first time he actually saw thru her fasade - You love things like that, I heard you speaking to Mary-Beth about it few days ago - his voice was harsh. - I am big fat liar, Mr Morgan and you are more than right! - Why you lie to me, then? You were telling all those things but now I think you didn't mean them- - Oh, did you? I know you didn't either. - Y-ya kidding me, kid? There is no day without me thinking about you. - I don't want you to think about me! Know what you really think about me and I am surprised with myself I was stupid enough to think you are normal. You are a weirdo who baths with dogs 'cause they are the only creatures that want to be around you! It was  the worst anybody said to him. Probably because no one was closer to him than her so far, but he didn't saw it that way. He couldn't think straight now, normally he was cold-headed and he would tell himself it's just anger talking through her. But now he decided to believe she hated him. He was glad that at least Iris took a book. 

[lostopx]

My Brazilian MC and her relationships with the demons pt. 2

For part 1:https://lostopx.tumblr.com/post/616317467421179904/soooo-im-very-bored-with-this-quarantine-and/embed

OBS: I never did this to offend anyone or any religion

The first part was more about Yume’s life. If you don’t wanna read part 1 I’ll say the basics here: she is a Computer Science student and the reason for her exchange in Devildoom it’s to study the technologies there, especially the D.D.D. She is half Japanese and loves animes, mangás, books, cosplays, games, and makeup.

Lucifer

Very rocky at first. She got angry because of his comment about stay alive and Yume hates to feel underrated, although he was SO FUCKING RIGHT;

She is sassy and sarcastic with him (Satan loves it);

When she found out about Belphie, Yume got so mad! But she couldn’t say anything about it, so, a form to “punish” him was making some pranks with Satan or Mammon;

At the same time, she appreciated his devotion to his family;

But Yume will NEVER admit it;

Yume likes to provoke him about it;

Until the day she figured out about what he did for Lilith;

She hugged Lucifer and improved her relationship with him;

They have conversations about how to “educate” Mammon (like a couple with kids);

She likes to listen to TSL soundtrack with him.

Mammon

So you see, that’s where the trouble began;

That smile.

That DAMNNED SMILE.

He was rude with her when they met, that is why she decided to join forces with Levi to make Mammon pay him;

Then, Yume discovered that he was just a masochist tsundere;

Mammon helped her to get a job as a model at Majolish and she never forgets who helps her to get money;

Sometimes Yume helps Mammon with his schemes (when is worthy to join) at the same time that she tries her best to avoid problems, especially with the witches;

She highed her money because Mammon once tried to steal her;

As a middle daughter, she knows how is like to suffer bullying from her brothers, so, she always defends him;

Almost always;

You know, Levi is her weak point. Probably because thanks to him she got a pact with a very powerful demon;

So, if Mammons owns money for Levi, Yume’ll use her powers to make her demon pay;

Despite that, they are a good team to get money. The difference is that Yume saves, Mammon doesn’t;

They are scheming to steal the money of a Brazilian politician and use to help her people;

Yume made a promise to herself that if Mammon doesn’t try to steal the money she’ll kiss him;

Maybe that won’t happen, but maybe Yume’ll find another excuse to kiss him;

Her hobby is to make Mammon blush.

Leviathan

Oh Boy;

He is her weak spot even when Mammon was involved;

She has a huge crush on him;

At first, she read, researched and watched TSL just to get closer with Levi;

She couldn’t care less about the competition;

But Levi doesn’t notice, because of his skepticism and insecurity;

Also, Yume is a disaster;

Because his attitude towards her drove her crazy;

He was such an idiot for calling her normie;

SHE HAD TO WIN THIS COMPETITION

And she won;

But Levi got angry and become a demon;

When Mammon asked Yume to run she obeyed him;

But she couldn’t stop her mind to think about how beautiful his demon form was;

If he wasn’t trying to kill her, she would make out with him;

Maybe the reason that she was never afraid of him was because of his form 

The main reason that she accepted the pact was to become closer to him;

And it worked;

Every night after studying she came by his room to play video games and watch animes;

She tried to teach him Japanese, but Levi was too nervous to learn;

Because Yume was so cute speaking Japanese;

At the same time, his heart stopped when she screamed her mother tongue;

She tried to pay Mammon to get Levi’s picture after a shower;

Mammon refused to give her;

So, she hacked his cell phone;

Yume flirted with him, but Levi always ignored her (but he always blushed);

Until the day she cosplayed Ruri-chan;

Levi couldn’t deal with it and stopped work;

After all, Levi was calm around her;

And maybe one of the reasons was because of her connection with the Orisha Ossum;

Ossum was associated with calm waters (and love and fertility).

Satan

He liked her since the moment that Yume was sarcastic with Lucifer in front of him;

They had a secret Fanclub of Lucifer haters;

Satan loved her sarcasm;

Yume loved Satan’s room with his books because it makes her remind of her littler sister;

They used to discuss their favorite books, but luckily they never fought for a character or ship;

Satan loved to listen to her stories about her hometown, especially about the religions;

He also loved to learn about some Brazilian authors and started to read them;

Yume took interest in detective books thanks to Satan: for her, it was just like a math problem;

They got fun while solving Grisella’s murder;

They both love cats;

Yume calmed him down;

She also has a crush on him;

SHIT.

Asmodeus

Honestly, Asmo was the first person that understands her;

At least when it comes to physical attraction;

Both couldn’t care less about the gender;

They clicked because of her spiritual connection with Ossum (Oxum), the representation of love on Candomblé;

She also has a huge crush on him but ignores this feeling because Asmo is the avatar of the lust, after all, everybody has a crush on him (that's Yume excuse);

His narcissistic personality annoyed her;

But Asmo was her confidant;

And her partner to buy clothes;

But she got angry with him because of Helene;

He understands her after a long conversation about feminism and her past relationships;

They made out once after some hallucinating flower on Diavolo’s garden;

Yume thinks that he’s pretty and laughs a lot with him;

They use to have some beauty sessions;

Asmo and Yume loved to go out on Brazilian clubs and have drink competitions;

He always won... Until her last day on Devildoom (*cough cough* Lesson 19 *cough cough);

They slept together once;

Yume once stole the girl he was interested ;

Asmo paid back using his charm power;

She flirted with Asmo back;

Asmo knows about her feelings for Levi but doesn’t understand why his heart hurts if he thinks about this.

Beelzebub

He was so sweet with her;

His stories about Lilith and Belphie made her heart melt... And also think about her brothers;

She was so sorry for him because his situation on the Celestial War was terrible;

Her wish is to protect him;

They are training partners;

Yume has some videos of Beel training and Mammon figured out;

At first, he got angry;

But then, he asked her to help him to seel;

Yume refused;

Yume would give the world to give some happiness to Beel.

Belphegor

Didn’t trust him at first;

After Beel tells about his twins, Yume figure’s out that is Belphie and go to confront him;

She got angry for what Lucifer did;

She couldn’t stand Beel suffering;

After all the demons were sleeping Yume went to the attic to bring some food to Belphie and read a book for him while he’s sleeping;

So, when Belphie hugged and stabbed her, Yume’s heart was broken;

That treason was so hard for her;

It took a while to forgive;

She accepted the pact with Belphie to show her ability to forgive.

Conclusion: Yume is in love with all the brothers lol. Maybe I wirte a fanfic about it if I have a public lol.

[thoughtfulfangirling]

I keep seeing these posts going around about queer books, but my problem is that nowadays, I struggle to sit down with books and primarily consume them via audibooks. A lot of the recs are ones I haven’t found in audiobook format using my usual routes. For this reason, let me start a post that I hope y’all will add onto that has LGBTQ+ folks in them that I know exist in audiobook format. For reference, I’ve used for my audiobook consumption Audible, Libro, Overdrive, and Scribd, so each of these will have been found by myself in one of those places.

Nemesis Series by April Daniels trans wlw MC | Superhero | coming of age | YA The First book is Dreadnought followed by Sovereign and follows Danny, a trans girl whose body is transformed to the one that matches her vision of herself after a superhero falls and passes his powers on to her. All at once, she has to face the coming out this forces on her and new powers all at once. The books are intense and doesn’t pull its punches on the things Danny goes through, but her journey is beautiful and I love her so much.

Beauty Queens by Libba Bray  Various MCs | Drama | Humor | YA This is an ensemble cast and includes a wlw couple and a trans girl, all of whom are pretty damn cool. On their flight to their next competition, the plane these beauty queens are on crashes, and those who survive get stranded on a totally-supposedly-deserted island. This is a fun novel that had, to me, a very Hitchhiker’s Guide sort of humor to it. It was a really fun read, and the author narrates herself and is really fun.

Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden wlw mc | contemporary | coming of age | YA The good kid becomes good friends with a girl she met outside of school, but she begins to realize she has more than just friendly feelings for the girl. Being in the 90s, she finds it’s not so easy to be the good kid and pursue this interest.

Her Royal Highness by Rachel Hawkins bi MC | Contemporary | Romance | Class Romance | YA MC leaves Texas, USA to finish her last year of high school in a prestigious Scottish school where she ends up being roommates with an actual princess with whom she doesn’t start the year out on good terms with.  

Ash by Malinda Lo wlw MC | Fantasy | Coming of Age | YA Cinderella retelling where the fairies aren’t guaranteed to help and the prince just might not be who Cinderella wants after all. A very internal journey, quite enchanting. I really need to go back and revisit this soon.

Juliet Takes a Breath by Gabby Rivera Lesbian MC | Coming of Age | YA Juliet leaves home for the summer to spend in Oregon with a writer who inspired Juliet’s journey into feminism and helped her embrace her lesbianism. She learns along the way though that adults are not infallible, and that this writer has a large blind spot when it comes to Juliet’s culture and the intersection of race and feminism. All this after having come out to her family and dealing with the fallout of that far from home.

Carry On by Rainbow Rowell mlm MC | Fantasy | Romance | YA This story feels like a sort of ‘What if the Harry Potter books were more inclusive and also had some parody in its magical world’ story. But it jumps right to the last book and the good stuff. This felt like fanfiction in the best way (and is appropriate given that it was written after the book Fangirl wherein the MC is writing fanfiction of this universe kinda. It’s complicated but good!)

Kushiel Phedre Series by Jacqueline Carey bi MC | Fantasy | Epic Fantasy | Kink | Political Intrique A woman born with a flaw that set her on the path of being indentured as a child to a man who sees love and sex as another means to gather political intel. Down this road lies intrigue, betrayal, and love.  

Nevernight Chronicles by Jay Kristoff bi MC | Fantasy | Revenge  Worth mentioning is that the author does not ID as any kind of LGBTQIA+ and in my opinion, that especially shows in the last installment of the series. I would suggest trigger warnings for the entire series if you have any as there is sex and violence. In a world with three suns and almost never night, a girl with a kinship for shadows seeks out the skills to kill those who destroyed her family.

Her Body and Other Parties by Maria Carmen Machado Various | Short Stories | Surreal | Contemporary   Don’t know how to summarize well given they are a series of short stories, but they are haunting and telling and beautiful, and even though I rarely do short stories, I absolutely fell in love with these.

The Night’s Watch by Sarah Waters Various | Ensemble Cast | Period Drama English WWII  Unfortunately, I read this in 2017 and it follows the stories of four different characters, two of whom are lesbians. I don’t remember their archs well enough to provide a proper summary. This story tends to be a more internal character study of each of the characters and what it might have been like living at the time they did. It was really good though if you like that sort of thing! 

Tipping the Velvet by Sarah Waters Lesbian MC | Period Drama | Romance | Coming of Age Taking place in the Victorian era, Nan leaves her coastal, oyster fishing home after becoming infatuated with Kitty, performer who sings dressed as a man. She discovers herself in the big city as she works as Kitty’s attendant, but nothing ever stays the same, and when she finds her and Kitty’s desires on how to handle their feelings differ errevocably, Nan is suddenly left adrift.

The above are all focused in one way or another on the LGBTQ+ character in a prominent way where the character’s queerness is made explicit in the text. Below is going to be the audiobooks I’ve read/listened to where I have felt there is strong evidence that a character is portrayed as LGBT+. Some will have been made canon by the author after the fact, others have been widely regarded as portrayed that way, and a couple are just how I interpreted them.

Trouble with Kings by Sherwood Smith Fantasy | Romance | Slow Burn | YA A princess of fortune who has been courted for her wealth all her life, Flian is quite done with dalliance. But that doesn’t mean others are done with her. Caught in the middle of a political intrigue between two... maybe three... possibly four??? rivaling kingdoms, she finds her wealth pursued in less than ethical manners and ends up a player herself on the field of political import. Is it even possible in the chaos of all this to find love along the way? Flian herself repeatedly shows no interest in romance and while able to remark upon attraction, never seems to have any herself until she realizes she has fallen for someone, someone she realizes a bit late she’s had a coming together of the minds for. For this reason, my personal interpretation of this character is demi-sexual. 

The Protector of the Small Series by Tamora Pierce Fantasy | Coming of Age | YA  Keladry of Mindelan wants to become the second lady knight in history. The trainer at the castle doesn’t believe girls are cut out for it, and the boys don’t seem the most ready for a lady knight in training either. But Kel is determined to make her place in the world. Throughout the course of the series, while she engages in some light dalliances, she finds herself disinterested in relationships and has been confirmed by the author since the series was published to be asexual. 

The Deed of Paksenarrion by Elizabeth Moon Fantasy | D&D-esque | Epic Fantasy | Coming of Age  Paksennarrion, a sheep farmer’s daughter, rebels against her father upon hearing of the engagement he made for her and runs away to a local contract militia company to start her career as a warrior. Strength and strategy aren’t the only things she’ll need on this life’s path, but also a faith she didn’t know she was capable of. I don’t know that the author has ever said anything on the matter, but in most circles you will find that Paks is generally regarded as aro/ace and is pretty explicitly stated several times throughout the series that she simply has never had the compulsion. 

A Beautiful Poison by Lydia Kang Period Drama/Mystery (early 1900s) | Coming of Age | Mystery Three people on the cusp of adulthood, with a complicated history of friendship from different stations in life, come together to try to unravel the mystery of strange deaths happening around them while trying to navigate what shapes the rest of their lives will take. Of the two man lady characters, one repeatedly struck me as bisexual, and the other as asexual. This is one where I’m brining my own lens to the story, and I don’t know that the author did this with intent.

There’s a fair chance that I am forgetting some audiobooks and haven’t included all I’ve read. I would also say that anything not marked with a YA may have want of some trigger warnings. If someone wants to know, just let me know which warnings you have need of and I’ll try to do my best to remember if that content is included in the book. I of course cannot remember everything and don’t know everyone’s limits, but I can try. But for certain the non young adult stories have content that can be heavy or dark or twisted. 

[bi-bobbysoxxers]

🏀, 📖, 🎸, 🚗, 👤, 📼, 💄, 🔮, 🎁, 💞, 👭, 💘, 🕛, ⛅ for the Gay/Lesbian ask game please?

Alrighty lol xD

🏀🏐 Do you play any sports?

Uh, not anymore unfortunately. When i was in middle school, i played basketball, volleyball, did cheerleading, and was in running club. In highschool, i did cross country in the fall, and i think that's it lol, since i was mostly obsessed with doing theatre lol. I realy liked building the sets and painting, and being on running crew lol. If i ever decided to join a sport, it would be either soccer or beach volleyball, since those seem the most fun. And good cardio too!

📖 Do you write?

Yeah, occasionally lol. I'm not the greatest writer ever, but i'd like to think i'm proud of the work that I've posted. Mostly just Haikyuu and K Project fics. Here's my AO3:

https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElotheFairy

Eventually i want to write some BSD and She-Ra fics, cause i have some ideas, i'm just pretty lazy when it comes to writing, whoops.

🎸 Are you a musician?

Oh I wishhh. That would be so cool. I used to be able to play the piano, and I'm able to reteach myself the scales and play simple songs if I'm sitting at home, but that's about it lol. I need one of those lil whiteboards that you can stick right above a keyboard so i can just have the scale in front of me and learn cute studio ghibli piano songs lol.

🚗 Can you drive?

Surprisingly, yes. Lol I'm a Midwest American queer, so we gotta either learnt to drive ourselves to the cool places, or date someone who can drive us everywhere xD I'm great driving in my hometown and in my college town, but I still can't drive in super big cities quite yet. That'll have to change soon tho once I move for my apprenticeship!

👤 Favorite LGBT fictional character?

Does Kakashi count xD

I'm sure there are a bunch of good queer characters out there, but deadass, most of the shows I watch, it's merely implied, oof. If we're going with canonly queer, i guess i like Simon from Love, Simon a lot. Oh, and of course, Scorpia from She-Ra lol. I hc her as a nb androg lesbian lol. Oh, and Chloe and Max from Life is Strange, and that one chick from Stranger Things, i guess.

If we're going with just, an implied/possibly coded queerness, I love Oikawa from HQ, i headcanon him as a demiboy who is bi or pan. (I headcanon that most fo the dudes from that anime are bi lmao). Uh, I also love Akutagawa and Odasaku from Bungou Stray dogs. I headcanon that Akutagawa is a trans nb guy, demisexual, and panromantic. I also hc Oda as bi lol. I also love Akagi and Misaki from K project, i hc Misaki as a bi trans guy, lol. And i hc Akagi as cis and bi. For She-Ra, i adore both Bow and Sea Hawk, i think it might be implied that Bow is a trans guy, so i hc him as trans and bi. And for my love, Sea Hawk, i hc him as bigender and bi, who laters gets into a polyamrous relationship with both Bow and Mermista lol. Sorry, I have a lot of implied queer hc's, lol.

📼 80's or 90's?

90's for fashion, hair, and makeup.

80's for great music, cute ppl, and fun design ideas lol.

💄 Do you like makeup?

Uhhh, it's kinda complicated.

I like makeup as a concept of freedom of expression, feminity, a way of transforming yourself into a piece of art, blurring the lines between gender ideals, presentation, makeup for fantasy concepts, etc.

But i also dont't like makeup sometimes because it's def been used as a tool to pressure women into performative feminity, used, as a way to groom young girls, used a sneaky way of breaking down a lot of ppl's self confidence, it encourages highly unrealistic beauty standards (for both women and men), i also hate how motherfucking EXPENSIVE and unsustainable it is.

So as a tool for art, genderfuckery, and self-expression, i love it. But as a msrketing concept mostly driven by male CEOs and years and years of misogny and captialism? Not so much lol. I like wearing makeup for big occasions or for when i feel hyperfeminine some days, but I usually prefer going without it.

🔮 Do you believe in astrology?

Yeah, to a reasonable extent lol. I'm not one of those queer that obsesses over every little detail tho. I'm still def learning about it. I recently lesrned that you can combine astrology, with tarot readings, which can greatly specifiy the readings, for both yourself and other people, so I think i'll try that once I get a tarot deck for my birthday lol.

🎁 Fave holiday?

Well, I could be one of those queers who automatically says Halloween, but the more i think about it, i think i like the fall/halloween season waaayy more. Which makes me think that I actually like Thanksgiving a lot, as just, an American holiday. I don't think we shoukd really celebrate it for it's historical reasons, but i also will never say no to good food, family, friends, and a general warmth and sense of peace during that time of the year :3

💞 Fave thing to do on a first date?

Festivals!!!! I looooovee going to any type of market, festival, etc. with someone. I think it's a great way to explore, start conversations, and learn about someone. Cuz like, the type of art, food, trinkets, and music that draws someone in can you a lot about that person, if you think about it! It's hella cute. And then once you're tired of the crowds, most festivals usually have quiet garden or parks near them that you can escape to for some quiet time and deep conversations, lol.

👭 Do u have a gf? Do you want one?

No, I don't have a girlfriend lol. I have an amazing and very caring boyfriend tho. I have briefly dated women in the past tho. It's been fun, lol. I've always wondered, if i had more past romantic/sexual experiences with women, then maybe i'd possibly identify as a lesbian, but honestly, I'm proud of my journey, and I get very happy when I think about my bigender-ness and bisexuality lol. I don't think I would change that for anything. For whatever reason, i think I just click better with bois and nb ppl rather than with cis girls, i'm not sure why lol. But good for anyone who has a gf right now plz treat her like a kweennnn xD

💘

Do you believe in love at first sight?

No, lol. I used to, back in middle school tho. I def believe in love at second sight, or love at first conversation. Ppl are so damn cute when they talk about things they're passionate about, or even when they just get goofy and rant to you about a crazy story lol.

🕐 How old were you when you realized you weren't straight?

Oh god, lol. I was... *tries to do math* I think 16 or 17? I uhh had accidentally fallen for one of my best friends in high school lol. It turned out okay tho, we're still friends to this day. Thanks for that, friend, I'm so glad i realized that sooner rather than later lol.

⛅ Winter or summer queer?

Oh def, winter, lol. Altho winter depression is real most years, idk, i feel lkke i would rather be anxious and cold, rather than angry and sweating buckets lol. Actually now that I think about it, the summer always makes me a little more moody than winter, cause i always feel like i should doing more, but summer's really a time for waiting and rest, if you think about it. I'm always happier in the winter cause most of the time, i'm slowly moving towards certains goals in my life, and the world just...seems happier and more cozy in the winter season, idk.

Thanks for these asks, dude! I had a lot of fun with them, lol.

Anyone can ask me any of the other q's on the pinned pride game list if you'd like! Happy Pride, BLM!!

[transadvice]

im really confused, ive been questioning for YEARS but im still confused. I feel like I should have been born with a cis male body but I love feminity and women’s fashion. I have dysphoria over being seen as a woman and having breasts but Im scared if I transition and still express myself femininely ill be fake or something or still seen like im a woman. i also feel like i *have* to be cis woman or else ill be considered ugly and no one will date me?

You came to the right place! I feel you so hard. This is basically my story. I have always been very femme in my gender expression. I love women’s fashion, the color pink, flowers, and so on. I enjoy baking, and I hate sports. Jane Austen is my favorite writer; I don’t get what’s so great about Fight Club. Also, I was assigned female at birth, and looked by any account like your garden variety cis girl/woman. Being a girl should have been an open and shut case. Yet, starting in puberty, and throughout my adult life, I felt a strong sense of discomfort and “wrongness” about body characteristics associated with femaleness, such as breasts. I wanted to be rid of them and have more male-associated body characteristics, like muscles and a beard. Although I believed I was a woman because that’s what people told me, and that’s what I looked down and saw, I was always somehow surprised about it. It was like my brain expected my body to be male.  The sex your brain expects your body to be, is what Julia Serano calls “subconscious sex” in her excellent book, Whipping Girl. Cis people have a subconscious sex that lines up with what they were assigned at birth. People who don’t? These are the trans people that experience physical dysphoria (Serano calls it “gender discordance”, a sense that your brain and body are out of sync where gender is concerned).  What about gender expression? Well, that’s another thing altogether! Just as many cis people express themselves in gender non-conforming ways, so too can trans people experience the full range of behaviors and interests and clothing preferences, whether or not they match up with what society says people of our sex are “supposed” to do or feel or wear.  Your sex assigned at birth does not necessarily line up with your subconscious sex does not necessarily line up with your gender expression. And even if you gender expression and your sex assigned at birth “match,” you aren’t doomed to be cis, or to live out your life as a sex that feels wrong to you. Subconscious sex can be hard to explain, especially to cis people who have never experienced discordance, but it is a real thing. Your feelings of being out of sync with your body are real, and the name for them is dysphoria. 

Look at it this way: if you were assigned male at birth, and you still loved women’s fashion and femininity, do you think you’d transition to female for that reason? Or would you embrace your love of heels but stick with your masculine body shape and appearance, perhaps joining a subculture of others like you, like the drag scene? Does that idea appeal to you? (You can go to there!)

Okay, getting real: yeah, expressing yourself in a feminine way may be a barrier to you being read by cis people as male, especially if you don’t medically transition (as many people don’t, either because they don’t want to or they can’t). Even if you do transition, early on, you will be frustrated that people continue to read you as a woman. That doesn’t mean you need to put your head down and live a lie. You can still ask people to treat you the way you want to be treated, such as by using “he/him” pronouns for you (if that’s what you want). You don’t need to “earn” it by “looking male enough” or by wearing boring clothes.  It should also be noted that if you do get on hormone replacement therapy, you have a good chance of developing masculine-associated body characteristics and being read as male most of the time within a year or two, no matter what you wear, because testosterone is a powerful drug. (That’s what happened to me!)  Now, onto the part of your question about attractiveness.

I think a lot of us worry that if we transition, we won’t be cute. Even the most goddamn hot trans people I’ve ever met have had this worry. It’s a natural to be nervous, given that we have to commit having no idea what we’ll look like post-transition, and given that beauty is so highly prized in our society. Plus, even if we do get to a point where we’ll be attractive by cis standards again (using the other binary sex’s standards), to get there, we have to go through a period where we are androgynous or have a mix of gendered cues going on, and that’s considered unattractive to some cis people.

I could say a lot about the intersection of cis beauty standards and trans shame, and about how AFAB people are conditioned to protect their sex appeal to cis straight men at all costs even at the expense of their own psyche, Naomi Wolf’s “Beauty Myth”, blah blah blah. But this answer is already really long. So I’ll just say this: 1. Cis beauty standards aren’t necessarily the end-all be-all. Androgynous or masculine does not mean ugly. Looking trans does not mean ugly.  2. So let’s say you’re ugly! Being ugly and yourself is better for your mental health than being beautiful and pretending to be someone else. 3. What if you’re hot as a boy though On a personal level, my love and dating life is much better now that I’ve transitioned, because I can interact authentically with people instead of hiding a huge part of myself. The first summer that I dated as a trans man was so much fun and revelatory: I had a different set of options for people to date, and honestly, a better set?? And it felt so good about MYSELF, and that made me feel more confident and attractive. I don’t know if cis people would consider me cute, and I don’t care. I don’t want to look or be cis. 

[ginnyzero]

Writing Female Agency

(Originally posted in 2018)

The 2018 Golden Globes kicked off this year with stirring speeches from celebrities about this is the year that we're going to stand up to gender discrimination and sexual harassment in the work place and hopefully our daily lives and work on making things more equal for men and women and hold those who do harass others accountable! I applaud this goal. I say "about time!" I hope that in the future female writers can submit their works and not be told you need to use a pseudonym or your initials. (Look, I use an initial for my last name because no one can spell it properly!) I dream of a time where female models don't have to worry about whether or not they have to have sex with the photographer to get a good shot. Or where the fashion houses founded by females are again run by females. (Because somehow 'female' work only becomes legitimate when done by a male, again, like being a chef.) And where I woman can walk into a manufacturing plant and not be snubbed or should be cleaning just because she's female. And I say those things because those are the fields I've worked in or trained for.

Yesterday, I talked about how it's good to give female characters agency, to give them power and something to do in a story. We are in 2018. Wonder Woman shouldn't be an outlier. Mad Max Fury Road shouldn't be an outlier. Hidden Figures shouldn't be an outlier. They should be normal. What else have women been fighting for since the 1960s? (Why in the world in the 50s did we let men chase us out of our factory jobs from during the war? Why? Argh. Rhetorical.)

Giving female characters agency is sometimes almost as simple as making them a male character then switching the pronouns. I don't recommend this method honestly. But it can be a good place to start if you don't know how to give a female power, choice and something to do.

The first way I tend to give a female character agency is that I normalize my character. What does that mean? I treat them as a human being. For instance, I try not to sexualize my female characters if they are doing something simple like eating or showering or getting dressed. I try not to draw attention to their private parts or act like they even notice them. (As a female the only time I notice my boobs is if they've shrunk, grown or are caught badly in my bra. I'm going to assume it's the same for men in some ways. They don't notice their junk unless it's uncomfortable.) If my female character is licking an ice cream cone or a popsicle, that's all  it is. There's nothing sexual involved. Why? Because I've lived with boys that have made me trying to eat a popsicle as something sexual and it is irritating as all get out.

Another way to normalize your characters is to not treat hobbies as gendered hobbies. Look, I know I gave Savannah the hobbies of cookie making, gardening and well, other artistic pursuits such as sketching, painting and candle making. None of these are technically gendered hobbies. My uncle is a fantastic cookie maker. His wife is into the amazing decorating aspect of cookies now but cookie making started out in that household with my uncle. (I mean it, best chocolate chip cookies. Yum.) Both my grandparents gardened though Grandpa tended more to the veggies than the flowers. And go to art school and I dare you to tell any of the male students that art is for girls.  On the other hand, Savannah's "job" is as an auto mechanic, which is stereotypically a male job. She rides a motorcycle, another supposed male activity. (Hah! 1/3 of motorcyclists in the US are female.) I think my favorite is Blake, who is male, into steampunk and likes to knit. (Because sailors knitted during the world wars so there.) Though Frankie is a close second who is female, teaches self defense at a local dojo and enjoys shopping. (After that it gets really difficult.)

The next good step in giving your female characters agency is allowing them to make choices. Sure, you've got your plot railroaded along in your head but oh gee, does this female character have any conflict? Or are they certain of their path? And is there a place in the story where they can stop and make a decision between A and B or C. (Choose C. Always choose C.) Giving a character a choice, giving them what looks and feels like control over their lives to the reader is in fact, giving a character agency no matter what your plot is. Especially if that choice ends up being against the character's self interest. Because that's part of the writing fantasy, sometimes readers feel so out of control of their own lives that they want to escape into a world where the characters do have choice and control. That way when they leave they feel like they have some choice and control. That having power is possible.

Empowering your characters gives them agency. And to be fair, that could be what your entire story arc is about, showing the character that they have power and control over their own lives and that they aren't at the whims of others. And hey, that's a powerful story in itself. There are many people who need that hope that even if the world seems against them, that they can get a smidgen of power and take their life back. Watch Hidden Figures. That is a story about women who never got their full appreciation still taking control of their lives and their power in NASA during the 60s. (While still being wives and mothers. So there.)

The next step towards giving your characters agency in a story is I find, to give them something to do in the story. Give them a reason to be there! Female characters that sit on the sidelines or wait to be rescued or have to be defended don't have agency. Whatever the character does or has talent in can be and should be part of the story. If it's a series of stories it doesn't have to be in every story, but the female character's talents should come into play somewhere.

A good example of this is in St. Trinian's. During one scene, Annabelle comes in to find her Aunt, Ms. Fritton, painting. She didn't know that her Aunt painted and they have a good chat about it. Then they go box because this is St. Trinian's School for Girls after all. The edit I have cut out two important scenes that involved Annabelle and Ms. Fritton (that possibly gave the whole game away and why they were cut, but I feel the story isn't complete without them.) In one, Annabelle, whose father owns an art gallery and would know a bit about art theft, suggests the ruse they end up using to get the money they need. And in the other, it's made clear that Ms. Fritton knows what is going on and is an active participant in the entire scheme. Both of these scenes show that Annabelle and Ms. Fritton (our two main characters) clearly are major influences to the rest of the story. They are there for a reason and the entire scheme couldn't happen without them!

Now in my own writing, the way I give Savannah (in particular) something to do in the Heathen's stories is by giving her jobs. Whether they are paying mercenary jobs or assignments given by Brand varies. But she has agency because the way she goes about these jobs is left up  to her and she's in charge. Sometimes her skill as an auto-mechanic comes into use. Sometimes she's just 'the planner' and shoots things. And I do try to bring in the different talents of the team into play. (Because it's more FUN that way and I have watched the Ocean's Franchise a little too much.) But Savannah doesn't sit around and wait for others to tell her what to do, she can't. Not and be V.P. of a motorcycle club.

As for Roxana in the Dawn Warrior, Roxana is a particular kind of mage, the type of mage that can take on evil mages and win. But evil mages don't run around looking for light mages to fight, that's just not an evil mage's style. So, she has to go hunt them down herself. And there are certain things that only she can do that are integral to the story. (As in, if she didn't do them, there would be a world full of werewolves and while that might be fun for me, err, not everyone wants to be a werewolf.) In this world, Roxana to an extent holds the cards. She's got a skill set that people will pay her to use. Because no one likes nasty evil magicians taking up residence in their back yard/forest/mountains.

Now, the next bit here is purely something I'm tired of seeing in fantasy writing whether it's normal fantasy or urban fantasy or even action stories or female led stories whatever. Please, for the love of god, avoid your female characters being kidnapped. (Unless they are working their way out of this themselves.) And avoid your female characters being raped. There is no faster way of stripping your female characters of all agency, power and control than these two things. And yes, in a way, I'm going to be dealing with some of this in the Dawn Princess and how horrifying it is and I never, ever, want to do it again. Once again, these are severely personal issues. Yes, I've read Briggs and I've read Bishop and let me tell you, the rape scenes are not why I read those books and when they happened I was severely disappointed in both authors. (Especially Bishop in her Tales of the Others series. We'd spent what, four books trying to get away from that nonsense. I do not recommend the Black Jewels Trilogy to anyone without a major talk first.)

Giving a female character agency, that is, power and something to do is only as difficult as it is to wrap your mind about the idea that females are people, they are normal human beings with hopes, dreams and fears. They aren't mysteries. They come in all flavor personality wise. They have done great things in the past (many we might not know about because men took the credit), the present and in the future. Don't discount 50% of the population due to their gender!

We need strong role models that all types of feminism and females are possible. We are human beings that deserve respect. It doesn't matter the size, the color of your skin, what you wear, your hobbies, if a female thinks she can do it, then she can. Period.