#idk more me rambling than anything else
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svtfoe finale was absolutely MESSY as hell but like. so much of the criticism i see just feels wrong..
putting it under a cut bcz this post ended up being longer than i expected, spoilers obv / svtfoe critical stuff still even if i am defending it
like "star merged two worlds causing total chaos just so she could see her boyfriend of like 3 hours" is something ive seen and that just isnt. really how it happened??
like, no.. star didnt know the two worlds would merge, like ive seen a lot of criticism of her and the finale being "star merged the worlds" but put it as if she Knowingly merged them. She didn't.
Also I've seen the "boyfriend for like one day" comment used to explain why her actions were so rash but it completely overlooks the previous relationship they had??? like they were best friends for 2 years, they spent every single day together for months at a time. They just started dating, yeah, but using that as a reason to why she shouldn't have tried to stay with him is stupid because it makes it sound like she just met him.
also, if anything them just dating could make it make More sense depending on how you interpret it. She's been crushing on this guy for 2 years and the second they get together she has to never see him again? she has to be stuck on a world she JUST wanted to get away from for a bit? a world she wanted to stop needing to hold together, a world that is going to be even more in shambles now? with a mother who just betrayed her???? ofc shes gonna wanna go to earth
like yeah, destroying the magic was an incredibly irrational decision but sometimes it feels overblown, like blaming her for things that just were not in her control. Like I dont get why people make Star sound worse than she is because like, she did some pretty shitty things already??? why do you have to make up stuff to be mad at the character for bro theres enough that actually happened..
i wish this finale was better written, i do genuinely think it had the potential to be a great and solid story. especially the destroying the magic stuff!! i think if the show built up to the concept of the multiverse being better without magic then that could have been great! instead they have the toffee storyline which was incredible for seasons 1-2-the beginning of s3 and it just ... gets dropped?? like they barely brought him up in season 4?
i want this show to get a reboot someday where the writers actually consider the overarching story better, i really think theres some great stuff that could be done with the destroying the magic plotline if it was built up and executed better.
#svtfoe#svtfoe positive#svtfoe critical#star vs the forces of evil#svtfoe analysis#i guess?#idk more me rambling than anything else
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I know damn well I misunderstood the assignment but we roll, I'll understand it some day
It's killer and dust btw. If you couldn't tell. Which you probably couldn't.. forgor to say but shhh 🤫 Killers having a convo with himself..
..I kinda wanna change my url but idk to what
#I got this compliment once and I was like :3 bc I like compliments. then 4 days later I recognise the name and pfp on#on a tumblr I rlly rlly like bc they're super cool make super cool art and has super cool ideas and I'm just like woah they complement me s#so I search my notifications to find which post they complimented me on and I find out. they're following me. ummm IJWEHFOIWJ#i just can't get over this bc they're literally so cool what#anyways#I got two whole documents of canon dust things and one ao3 of canon things about killer#so I'm learning a way to do justice to the creators image while still putting my own twist on it bc I love fanon and that's how I grew up#I'm literally so passionate about fanon. specifically Gacha fanon bc it's literally so fun and no one else know that#like. literally everyone just like had terrible experience apparently idk how I didn't experience that#am I the only one who knows these characters still had lore Ben though unrelated to anything canon at all#anyways I'm rambling too much whoops#sans au#utmv#undertale au#sanscest#if u want#killer sans#dust sans#kist#if u want...#LOVE affair#teaching myself to use this tag too but eh#did you know Horror is more likely to be a part of the bad Sanses than Dust#Jesus fuck I rambled these tags to hell
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#this question is very hard for me to answer so obviously I have to torment everyone else with it#cause like. like I can really see the potential in either answer. both are feasible#I will say. most realistically. to me. edwin first charles harder#because I think…..I think the reasoning behind the other way around usually tends to be about how edwin absolutely was slower to bond and#open up in general whereas charles hit the ground fucking running#but i don’t think that particularly applies to their romantic relationship#if you mean ‘fell for’ in a general sense rather than a romantic one then yes 100%#but that’s not what im talking about here#I have a few different reasons but generally I think edwin fell first because like… the way he attached himself to charles and accepted him#as his person and etc is so unlike him to do with literally anyone- especially at the point where they first met/the first years they knew#each other. charles just seems to have hit him as something very very special and irreplaceable quite quickly for him to open up the way he#did and change and flourish into a fully realized person because of how safe and worthy charles made him feel#he took to charles with an unusual amount of ease and trust and I think that says something about how charles struck his heart Early#whereas with charles… yes on one hand he did stay on the mortal plane largely because of edwin and absolutely would’ve been impacted by the#tender act of mercy that was edwin reading to him as he died so he wouldn’t be scared. that’s absolutely what got him to trust edwin and to#want to be with him and protect him and so on#but charles would still do that and be like that under intense platonic circumstances I think#but most importantly I just think charles fell harder. when he fell is less important to me here- more important is that by GOD that boy is#down so fucking bad and outright SAYS IT in so many ways that he doesn’t realize– the sheer amount he restates how he’s content so long as#he’s with edwin. how he doesn’t want to be anywhere where edwin can’t follow. would and Did go to hell and back for him. believes him#to be the kindest and most incredible person he’s ever met. prioritizes him above anything and everything. etc etc etc#that’s not to say edwin doesn’t feel a similar amount of devotion– but charles just. really loves him with his whole person. loves him as a#fact of his existence and a piece of his very soul#idk man. it just feels like he is so incredibly smitten and he doesn’t even know it.#like I said though I can see both options and give reasons for both options so this question EATS at me I GENUINELY don’t have a super#strong feeling either is absolutely correct. it’s so difficult to answer they’re both so smitten and have such a history and GRAHHHH#payneland#dead boy detectives#rambling#polls
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Sorry for all the ventposting it's just that I'm fucking miserable and no one really loves me enough to stay
#the fag speaks#Breakuposting#Just waiting for Dean to leave tbh. They're the only one I have left atp#Bc Digby is gone & idk how much I can trust [REDACTED]#Alli hasn't fucking texted me back in like 2 weeks#And I'm not super close with anyone else#So my close support system is. 1 person rn!#And don't get me wrong I love him more than anything#But. You Should Have More People In Your Support System!!!#There's a ton of people i wanna get closer with#Maybe I should just make a gc and throw everyone I wanna talk to more in there#/hi#Anyways. Tag ramble over sorry.
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hey does anyone wanna bounce bellhands/they all went to pirate school together ideas with me? im trying to figure out the missing pieces of my personal set up and it might be easier with someone else!
#if youve never spoken to me before please be aware i will type a whole paragraph in response to one (1) sentence#but if ur down for that! please.#ive got like. the start and the end and a couple bits in the middle fleshed out but it doesn't f l o w#this is the problem with trying to condense more than a years of ideas into one cohesive narrative. i usually swap and change things as#and when it suits so im like. i don't know what i need in this#its just for my silly little tumblr post but#i would appreciate it <3#i can send you what ive wrote and we can go from there or we can start from scratch bouncing ideas or u can just ask me questions#or something to help fill in gaps idk whatever works for u! what ive got is like. a fuckin mess honestly its ramblings and half finished#thoughts and just. its. a complete state and thats not even touching on whats missing (like. anything that matters in the middle basically)#nyxtalks#ofmd#bellhands#sam bellamy#izzy hands#israel hands#if you're unfamiliar with the concept: its Hornigold era stuff; jack + ed + izzy + sam all sailing under him and learning the ropes togethe#im not trying to go into too many details; just the underlying structure that is what I think of when i think of them#its probably not something anyone else cares about but i think i need it for some of the more fun 'what if Izzy went with sam' posts#i realised if i wanted to say what the divergence point was i Needed to establish all this lol#'oh yeah its when izzy chooses sam after the mutiny despite their argument' NYX WHAT ARGUMENT. you need to tell us what u mean
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dude i phrased that sonic v shadow post so wrong. in my head “more skilled” meant shadow relies on more specific skills like gunplay and chaos energy manipulation, and more theoretical knowledge, not that he’s generally more proficient. “raw power” is wholly undescriptive and invokes an image of brute force, which isn’t what i meant. sonic has significantly more actual experience and more honed movement. sonic is a very quick learner, and has dexterity and stamina off the charts. he’s most certainly not unskilled, not in general nor compared to shadow, so i supremely failed if i implied that.
in my head at least, shadow would’ve learned to fight in a controlled environment, if he had physical training at all. i imagine he’d be book smart, had a formal education and shit. either he learned and trained on the ark, or when gerald messed with his memories he implanted fighting knowledge too, baymax style, or something i guess. sonic learned to fight through actual experience, so sonic would be the one with far better battle sense and instincts, it’s like second nature to him rather than a studious pursuit. dude’s graceful as hell, makes everything look easy; no way in hell is he unskilled or less skilled than shadow. shadow’s skill is like, classical, whereas sonic’s is pure schmovement. but idk i’m just thinking aloud.
#rambles#shadow v sonic is more like. top of the class hard worker vs genius prodigy#they get similar scores but if the genius wanted to really apply himself he could be curing cancer or whatever#or something idk. my thoughts are hard for me to understand#more skilled was definitely misspoken. there’s a really narrow definition that i didn’t explain well enough where that rings true#in most other senses sonic is more skilled than shadow yeah#gah i hate realizing i’ve badly miscommunicated an idea i find fun#i need a disclaimer for every post i make like:#(THIS IS A FUN LINE OF THOUGHT I FIND INTERESTING. IT IS NOT ANALYSIS NOR DO I BELIEVE IT. IM PLAYING DOLLS)#dude i miss my old pinned post i’m just saying words recreationally#i don’t believe this post either i say shadow fights classically#but like i don’t know of any teachings that primarily involve kicking people in the back of the head and teleporting#it’s an interesting line of thought that provides an interesting contrast. regardless of if it’s literally true#i’m full of shit basically. i know that. i really don’t want to claim anything else#SORRY.
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this is probably definitely an unpopular and potentially controversial opinion, but i saw a take recently on npss and the female characters of dmbj that to be fair pops up often that i feel it’s a pretty prevalent one, so i just. decided to give my two cents on it that once again no one asked for
more under the cut because this got a little long
just to be clear, this a topic that has quite a bit of nuance and multiple layers to it, and perception entirely depends on both personal interpretation and your medium of choice. i’m also not saying that npss is some pioneer in terms of writing female characters because he’s not. but i also feel that saying he’s a blatant misogynist and that he can’t write female characters properly at all is a gross exaggeration and doing the ladies of dmbj a disservice
i’m also going to be talking about the books specifically here, since the books and the dramas/movies treat female characters differently not only because of plotline reasons, but because of the differences in the nature of their narratives. the dramas have quite a bit more of the accusations people tend to like throwing at dmbj like reducing female characters to flat, one-dimensional archetypes or fridging the dramas do have su nan though, but contrary to what a large part of the fandom seems to push forward, the dramas don’t and can’t represent dmbj in its entirety, and if you’re going to try and do that, you can’t leave out the books and vice-versa, but seeing how different both versions of the story can get at times i just tend to separate them entirely
as it stands, the only female characters who die in the books zhang haixing not counting because we technically don’t know what happens to her are a ning and yuncai, and i guess you can add huo xiangu to that, but she's part of the lao jiumen and chen pi ah si dies similarly so not sure that counts here really. and while you can argue for a ning at least that her death for narrative purposes was fridging, npss also used panzi’s death later on for similar narrative purposes, so at least in that respect he doesn’t discriminate
don’t get me wrong, the books aren’t perfect either, and you do get misogynistic comments from the male characters from time to time that make me squint, which is why i’m not trying to pretend dmbj is peak feminism, but they’re also not egregious or frequent enough comments, and in my opinion the main difference with the dramas is that the male gaze in the books is at least somewhat more justified, because where the dramas are necessarily presented from a third person pov, the books are wu xie’s first person pov for the most part. dmbj is essentially written as and treated as wu xie’s memoirs, and so everything and everyone is seen and filtered through the lense of his perception. and wu xie is a man, so that comes with its own set of ramifications. and even then ironically, wu xie is far from the only or the worst culprit when it comes to casual misogyny. pangzi has his fair share of takes, as do a number of other characters
but for all that the female characters are sometimes placed into archetype boxes by virtue of not only the narrative being from wu xie’s pov, but also the fact that the tomb robbing business is shown to be a male dominated one, and also just because npss himself is a man, that doesn’t mean those female characters aren’t complex and fleshed out characters in their own right to the same extent as their male counterparts of similar narrative relevance
i’m thinking of huo xiuxiu for example, who’s arguably the most prominent and recurring female character in dmbj, who from the get-go is very quickly made out to be not a pretty girl (or rather not just a pretty girl) but quick-witted the likes of which wu xie resonates with as a kindred spirit and draws a number of parallels with himself because he finds they share similar ways of thinking and problem solving. she’s capable, skilled, and sees herself as an equal to the iron triangle and the men around her, and yet none of this detracts from either her femininity or her vulnerability as the youngest lao jiumen member, and later as the one left behind to pick up the broken pieces of her own family. she’s a leader in her own right, and she gains support from xiao hua and wu xie in the years leading up to sand sea just as much as she lends them her support in later canon. all of this without ever being presented as a potential love interest and reduced to only that wu xie’s lack of interest in women in a practical sense as romantic/sexual partners is a topic for another post but it’s also a thing that contributes to not relegating most of the female characters to just that too
i’m not about to say npss is being particularly progressive, but it’s also interesting and nice to note that even in recent canon, just like the iron triangle and xiao hua, huo xiuxiu is well into her 30s and unmarried without it ever either being mentioned really or being an issue, which considering the cultural significance of marriage in china, even more so seeing as xiuxiu is the heiress and head to a powerful family, it’s worth noting she’s not treated any differently from the male characters who make the same equally culturally problematic choices. she’s too busy going with the iron triangle, xiao hua, and hei xiazi down into dangerous tombs (which is why she’s often featured in official merch as a main cast member alongside the iron triangle and heihua)
i’m not going to get into the nitty-gritty about every single female character otherwise this would get way too long but i could, but even someone like liang wan, who is absolutely portrayed as vain and sometimes unrealistically obsessed with her appearance and chasing after men, i personally find still has more depth given to her in the book in some respects, because as zhang rishan isn’t in sand sea the book, she has no romance plotline, and so not only does she get pov chapters, she gets pov chapters that flesh out her involvement with wu xie’s plan and the wangs by extension, and her goals, though never followed through on because npss didn’t tie up that loose end, i find are far more driven by something deeply personal. zhang haixing in tibetan sea flower is arrogant and condescending, manipulative as much as she is competent, and while pangzi especially responds to her behavior with borderline misogynistic provocations, it’s very clear that her character isn’t so much the fruit of putting her in the femme fatale archetype box as it is a consequence of her being a zhang. because both zhang haike and zhang hailou (aka ‘little brother zhang’) who are both men, are very much also like this. special mention also to the girls from the side novel a thousand faces because yes npss wrote a book that’s entirely about two women who may or may not be girlfriends
i could also talk about chen wenjin whose entire story runs very much parallel to wu sanxing’s and they both end up with similar endgame situations and are both tragic characters but this post is already long enough. there are more minor female characters who get their share of both “screentime” and development on par with their male counterparts, and for the sake of argument, some of these female characters have as much presence and/or depth given to them as a character like liu sang, who while being a fandom darling, is also very much a minor character. so what i’m saying is that while yes most of the characters in dmbj are men, and the main cast even more so (excluding xiuxiu), at equal level of importance, there’s about as much depth to a character like liu sang as there is to a character like liang wan, or a ning, and so at some point it begs the question of how much of the fandom’s perception of depth in minor female characters is colored by personal preferences rather than objective fact. are there female characters who are basically reduced to being a romantic interest and serve no real purpose other than to be the source of a man’s pain? yes looking at yuncai whose death is both sudden (while it does have some minor foreshadowing) and happens so far towards the end of the book that it almost seems pointless, and in the end only serves as the catalyst for pangzi’s own suffering and justifies his almost ten-year on-and-off retreat to banai
because again, npss isn’t out here making dmbj a feminist manifesto, and there’s room for criticism and pointing out a number of things if you wanted to. but he also doesn’t write bad female characters. they’re as much people as the men are for better or worse, and saying npss can’t write women properly is doing them a disservice. not to mention the fact the dmbj never leans into romance and that actually almost every single ‘canon’ romance is doomed in some capacity means women are rarely relegated to solely being potential love interests, which in a narrative dominated by the male gaze is actually nice?
#dmbj#dmbj ladies#idk what else to tag this with honestly#this is more me rambling into the void than anything else
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Husband apparently found some posts of people complaining about trying to play Divinity: Original Sin 2 after enjoying BG3. And to that I say, just be glad you weren't playing with my husband, whose favorite battle strategies were "Laser Ray everything and I mean EVERYTHING in his path" and "use Internal Combustion on allies to turn them into walking time bombs if that maximizes the number of enemies hit, and also out of combat just for fun"
#dos2#no but im not surprised some people who loved bg3 are bouncing off of it cause thats just how it goes#when a franchise or developer gets mainstream acclaim after already making a lot of games#a lot of people wont even bother to look at previous games#some will#and some will come to love them just as much as old fans#and others will bounce off it because its less polished or just plays a little different#to me bg3 felt a TON like dos2 except with d&d rules with which i was already quite familiar#to people going backward to dos2 it may not feel as similar#dos2 is also much more linear#also playing a custom character is even less interesting than making a tav is#in both games the origin characters are just FAR more interesting ways to experience the plot than customs#but idk it is actually kinda fun to make a custom tav. in dos2 i do not recommend doing anything but an origin run#ugh i cant stop rambling dos2 is so good you should really try it#if nothing else you need to discover the far cooler version of elves#uh. cw for cannibalism with them though
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:)
#A nice episode :) I have a lot of headache tho and forgot everything I wanted to say#The ss/kk is nice :) It's nice every time Akutagawa spontaneously saves Atsushi seemingly with no reason to#The animation was very nice! It's evident a lot of money and effort went into this season and these last episodes in particular#And I like the art style a lot better than the one in the other seasons. Even season 4 where the animation is comparatively as good#What more. The Kyouka screentime is nice. The whole Guild aftermath celebrations section is very nice and heartwarming to watch#I still take a lot of issues with the entire way Kyouka's entrance exam was conceived but I think they're fairly self-explanatory.#Also fundamentally coherent with b/sd's general worldviews so#But even then there's a line that bothers me to an unexplainable amount from the first time I watched it to now.#The “it hurts” when she's hugging Atsushi. And I've reflected over that line so long from the moment I first heard it...#I think. Its meaning is to symbolize how being in the light sometimes will still result to be too overwhelming for Kyouka–#to the point at times it will still end up hurting her. But that doesn't make it any less worth it#So to say‚ there's no such thing as perfect happy endings. But she is going to be okay nonetheless#BUT IT STILL BUGS ME. I feel like it's part of a school of thought for whom we should just accept the fact that there's evil in the world–#that we can't eradicate. And nothing can be done about it. Which I don't think is a functional or useful way of thinking?#ALSO I know it's. Most definitely‚ 99% not how the scene is supposed to be interpreted#BUT ATSUSHI IS THE ONE HUGGING AND THUS HURTING HER and you know how there is this very slight narrative that seemingly–#frames Kyouka and Atsushi as romantic partners and like... Idk.#In that context the line almost feels expression of a narrative of wives having to bear pain that is natural and unavoidable.#I know this definitely wasn't the intended meaning it's just a bad impression for some reason I can't be able to shrug off even after years#But don't listen to me#I don't think there's anything else to add. Overall a very good episode.#Take a shot every time someone says “all according to Dazai's plan”#random rambles
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yesterday at 29.5 years old I watched as many videos as I could find from my high school marching band, choir, and theater run crew days and realized I barely have any memories of my junior year of high school (13-14 years ago btw) other than feeling bad™️
#i know i was bullied by people i considered friends and theyre all super christians now which is so discordant with who i am lol#it was def a lonely year but i also like forgot the marching band show (it was p cool)#i literally cried my eyes out when i found the 2011 marching band vids#i was like there's little lost baby me and just wanted to hug her#and say itll be okay youre gonna go through things good and bad that you cant even imagine rn#also looking back im like wow most people were in choir OR band OR run crew#very very few ppl were in all of them and possibly nobody else was in all of those when i was?#i found a kid i guess 8 years younger than me who posted all his jazz band and choir and theater vids from my hs#and thats the only other person i can think of that genuinely got involved in all of those things#being a jack of all the performing arts and master of none was lonely tho#i didnt quite fit into any of the cliques bc i was half in half out of everything#its so insane how much i changed when i got to college (two weeks/14 days after my hs grad bc summer session...)#and that change was not instant#i was a swirly mess figuring out who i was for the first two years of college#i mean life is just a swirly mess of figuring out who you are#but like i got to college and realized i barely actually resonated with anything i was doing#and let go of and then relearned to love things like choral singing and playing flute#choral singing in college was so much better than high school bc it was for fun for everyone instead of the choral girls whole personality..#also the 'best' singers from my high school mostly aren't even in music today or doing any singing outside of karaoke...#at least i wrote a whole ass ep last year???#and ive written much more music that i havent released#idk rambling tags make it sound like the identity struggle never ends but dissociating and forgetting portions of ur life doesnt help lol#t#okay bye
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truly reading about the blood angels, dante and sanguinius will drive a man insane
the rafen omnibus was a fun read, same with the devastation of baal once I got into it and now im nearly done with thr first book about dante and just
god.
i keep screenshotting so many parts to send to my friend and go a little crazy over just because it's little fun lore details i simply didn't expect to read about and it just makes me so. kicks a rock.
i get it. space marines are brainwashed and bad and all that but. well. 🥺 they are all my darlings
#i should read about other chapters too but#oh the blood angels just have me enthralled (haha. joke. because human servants are called blood thralls within the chapter)#when my. friend first told me abt blood angels before i decided to dip my toe in i was very amused by thr fact that they#practice arts and crafts to not go. insane#but now I'm just. so eternally charmed by it. fascinated even#idk where else to rlly ramble so i shall ramble into the void here#all this lore making my head swim with thoughts#wh40k#<for organization sake more than anything
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another thing I do wish had at least come up in ds9 while talking about the bajoran faith is the idea of just like. secular bajorans. I think the way they’re written that’s kind of ‘everyone just believes in the religion and that’s it’ is honestly a little flat? but I think there would be people who have a very complicated relationship with the prophets, who maybe didn’t believe in them before the events of the show and now maybe they have to but they think of them more as the wormhole aliens rather than gods, or just don’t believe (anymore, if they once did) that they should be worshipped because they allowed the events of the occupation to happen. but that wouldn’t mean entirely disengaging from the practices of religion as a community thing, or as comfort in times of need bc sometimes that sense of ritual can be a good one, who still wear the earring not so much as a sign of faith but just as a sign of being bajoran and being connected to their people.
idk not to sound like I’m overexplaining secular approaches to an ethnoreligion when that’s a lot of people’s lived experience but I’m just kind of thinking about what it would look like in this context, and I don’t know that it ever would have been a whole plotline but I think a mention could have been interesting. maybe something as small as rearranging duty schedules and it’s something that would interfere with religious services, but a couple specific bajorans are willing to take that because they’re not religious, and it’s a one line mention (which is the kind of thing ds9 often did well so it would feel natural), but it makes them a little less homogenous as a species.
#i don't really count the pah wraith cult for depth honestly like. it's never really about them#sometimes I feel like the show dropped the ball a little on bajorans other than kira and winn#like people always joke about how boring bareil and shakaar are and then idk that anyone else really gets talked about#and even if you expand to other shows you get ro laren and sito jaxa but let’s be real it’s mostly me talking about the latter#the few one-offs on voy don’t really have much going on (which is a bummer it would have been nice to have a recurring maquis bajoran)#and idk about later shows really but the prequel types won’t have anything so. idk.#I think just. adding a little more individuality in terms of things like faith could have helped the perception a little?#idk this became a grander statement than it was meant to be I’m really just rambling#and now im trying to tie it back together and i really cannot. good luck.#san rant#im sure this is a post someone else has already made but im always just doing whatever.
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"although walburga hated her mother and swore she would never become her, she ended up walking in her shoes, wearing her dresses and using her punishments." SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP
#i cry thinking about generational trauma#bc i see it reflected in every family member i know#it's no where near as bad as we make the black family out to be but it's there#and i see it in myself#although in my case it's more war trauma than anything else#i look in the mirror and see my father's lips and my mother's chin and i take pride in those features#+knowing they connect me to distant relatives that i only know through pictures or names engraved on gravestones#but what is it like to look in the mirror and be afraid of the person you see staring back at you#+because you look exactly like the ones who hurt you?#nymph rambles#idk what i'm talking about today don't read too much into what i'm putting down here
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listen we all know about praise kink mac but i also think praise kink dennis. and i also think that if mac told him hes doing well in a completely sweet and earnest and painfully loving way dens brain would make the window emergency shutdown noise and smoke would start coming out of his ears
#me woobifying? in my house? yes!!#like sorry but he wants to be told hes doing good so bad. he needs it in a different way from mac wheres hes grown addicted to it#but like in a twisted way. i think being cringe and genuine gets to him more than anything else like with the rpg#i will die on this hill and u can not agree thats fine but i think that dennis can say the most unhinged stuff about being sculpted like#michaelangelo or whatever that twinks name was and if mac gushes too much it feels fake and annoying to him but mac just said ur pretty#being completely genuine about it i think that would crack den like an egg. idk#he has the other side of the coin of dees issue where she wants praise so badly she begs for it#sorry for rambling but also its my blog so i should be allowed to ramble actually
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Thinking a lot recently about the fact that within a wider group of friends there will be people you don’t like. And this is fine and normal and you just get on with them because that’s what you do. But when it happens in a smaller group which is tighter knit, what do you do then? If you try and do the same it comes across weirdly. Because the level of closeness with the rest of the group is on average higher than in a big group.
#this is again a thought for the ig story that inopportune people would see if i put it there#but like. it’s happened in two small friend groups now#where there’s a person i actively dislike and this is in different ways like one of them i just really don’t gel with#and the other actively makes me uncomfortable in a lot of ways#like being around them in a group setting is fine and normal and i don’t mind#but i really hate lying about the phrase i love you or the sentiment of appreciating people and it’s difficult not to in that situation#because when one or other or both of those sentiments is applicable to everyone else in the group it feels mean to express it#in group settings because i can’t or won’t about them. especially because the one i just don’t gel with hasn’t done anything#like i just don’t like them very much which is absolutely not a crime and im sure they’re a wonderful person#like i just don’t wish to be around them more than necessary. but this is not reciprocal (or if it is they’ve been lying to me) and idk how#to deal with that.#this has been a ramble and a half but oh well i don’t force you to read my tags#the worst part is because they’re within a group of friends and it’s just personal dislike i can’t talk to anyone i might normally#talk to about this sort of thing. bc they either don’t know them or are friends with them.#so that’s fun.
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good luck with your writing keri, i hope you'll figure everything out soon! and don't worry about the quality of it, i'm sure it's still good even if you haven't touched it in a while 🫶 your abilities don't just go away!
(and i really need to read your fics finally)
My fics are only for genshin tho 😭😭 it's just kaeya / ragbros HDHAHSH old hyperfixation hit hard. But if it's smth u like then have fun reading hahdhs ^^
Any sekai "fics" so far are only wips..for the same reason as stated earlier hxjsjdh. But thank you still, maybe sometime I'll figure it out And stop holding back bc of those doubts and all 🤍😔🫶🫡
#idk why and when the switch happened but at some point writing became rrally hard to me#havent finished anything that would satisfy me for like a year now hdjsjdh#mb it makes me sad i cant write like i used to. or i just became more critical than before. idk#iudhhhj anyway. im ranting#i still havr art so at least theres that even if i dont manage to write or smth. its easier. somehow#but i just miss writing#but never miss it enoigh to actually write despite everything else holding me back#sorry i started kind of ranting there havent i ahdhhshd#keri rambles#asks#ririś tag
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