#i think. sol is very much a person who . on some level recognises the things he lacked in his life and compensates for it by extending that
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sideblogdotjpeg · 23 hours ago
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have been thinking about professor sol even. professor bufo with no clearly discernable lesson plan. sol bufo ostensibly martial arts professor who spent two weeks running a yoga and meditation program and shows up to the next class with crochet hooks for everyone. professor bufo who is technically supposed to be assigning grades to students but hasnt given anyone less than an A because "i think they worked really hard and they did a great job :)" (referring to the ugliest and most malformed pot holder anyone has laid eyes upon in their life). professor bufo who is on his way to cluelessly kickstart the sexual awakening of about half the cohort of the academys new students. sol bufo adjunct professor who is gone half the year and his first class back is so immediately and easily baited into going into a long tangent about how cool his friends are. sol who is pretty sure hes easily the most useless professor on campus and almost cries when he sees his little desk overflowing with thank you notes at the end of the year. professor bufo absolutely fucking gloriously hot in the tightest little sweater vest because there were faculty complaints when he wore a crop top to class.
#ramble tag#ive been. ive been thinking.#aum. ultimately i just think.#like launchpad was a place for sol that was . place where he was demeaned abused exploited endangered and used#but he needed a place like that. so badly . really it was like. what else did he have.? the lightkeepers?#sol needed a place that would tell him he had a family . and thats what launchpad was!#launchpad is. if youre smart and talented and hardworking and brave enough then people will love and respect you. and you can belong.#and even if it was conditional sol needed a promise like that so badly .... the life that he dreamed of being within his reach.#so. IDK. i just. think...... and maybe this ooc but . well its POST CANON SO I CAN DO WHATEVER TF I WANT.#i just like to imagine sol as a . like yeah he has a minus one to intelligence and hes silly and stupid and very often incomprehensible. but#like . the kind of person who radiates kindness and passion. and maybe more than anything. unwaveringly believes in you no matter what.#i think. sol is very much a person who . on some level recognises the things he lacked in his life and compensates for it by extending that#to others. loudly and proudly shouting all the time. i want to care for you protect you help you believe in you support you and love you#:-) so. despite him being a . real hot mess. i think he would be a good teacher. even if he does for some reason spend a month teaching#his martial arts class how to cook a mean pasta.#(and not even mentioning sol travelling over bahumia to find kids like him who didnt are in bad situations and need a place where they can#be kids. and extending them a hand ... giving them a home and a space to just fuck around and make silly pots instead of fghting to survive)#ahem . ahem ahem. but WHATEVER#anyway if this is ooc i dont care because . thog dont caare .#this is post canon and this is a sandbox for me to do my silly little tag-yapping
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oswald-privileges · 4 years ago
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ALL RIGHT BUT YOU ASKED FOR IT
Power of Three as a series is just. full of weaknesses, most of which come down to poor continuity and structure. I'm not gonna try and fix ALL of those, bc that'd be laborious as hell, but I will pick out things that I feel are the most egregious as case studies.
What Po3 does have, tho, is an absolutely shining strength in the concept of its three main characters. After twelve books of Blandly Heroic Protagonist Syndrome, Jayfeather is an absolute godsend. He's angry! He's rude! He's unhappy! He's not nice. I Love Him And He's My Son. Lionblaze has his invincible pride (hah) and emergent bloodlust, and Hollyleaf has her moral absolutism and certainty. These are good starting points for characters. Sadly, the lack of continuity undermines what could have been three really good character arcs.
So! I present to you:
HOW TO MAKE "WARRIORS: THE POWER OF THREE" NOT COMPLETELY SUCK ACCORDING TO MY PERSONAL TASTE; A NON-EXHAUSTIVE, NON-CONSECUTIVE LIST BY ME
ONE
- Have there be a persistant, overarching series threat. Sol is a character with amazing villain potential who does literally nothing except hang around, and do exactly 2 Bad Things completely off-screen. This Is Not Good.
- Instead, have him be present from the second book onwards- initially introduced as a friendly but enigmatic outsider who is slowly revealed across the series to be a complete black hole of a personality, a social parasite quietly rearranging whatever community he's a part of to just-so-happen to benefit him as much as humanly possible. His "preach individualism not starclan" methods are not so much values as one strategy out of many. (to those who know me- yes i have a type. no i will not apologise.)
- Maybe his ultimate goal is to dissolve and centralise the clans or something so that he can live out his life as a political puppetmaster in all the cat-luxury he likes. idk it's hard to imagine overall stakes for this rewrite BECAUSE THE ORIGINAL DOESN'T HAVE ANY
TWO
- For gods sake you don't have a series based on the premise of "the main characters develop super powers" and then only have the second power confirmed by the end of the fourth book. I understand the first book mostly focusing on Jayfeather- his powers are obvious from the start, he's got the strongest personality of the three, he gets access to most of the prophecy plot stuff because of them. But you NEED to have the other two show an interest in something concrete happening to them beyond that, and you need to at least hint towards the other two having something unique to them even if nobody clocks it yet.
- Have Jayfeather tell his siblings about the prophecy by the end of book two at the latest. The amount of time he spends noodling around not sharing it with them is inexcusable. It's not that it's out of character for him to hang onto a secret for a bit, it's just that there's no point and it slows everything down. It would be equally in character for him to go to his siblings and be like "look, i'm SPECIAL. well you as well but ALSO ME". Boy starts off as desperate for recognition, what can I say
THREE
- Have Jayfeather discover that StarClan don't withhold signs or information on purpose for the sake of "building courage and faith" or whatever nonsense. Seeing and communicating the future is metaphysically very difficult, so interpreting signs and messages is a genuine skill, or even an art. The cats of StarClan, however, really are just ghosts, much more similar to living cats than the currently living believe. This is the impotus for Jayfeather's discarding of his reverence for StarClan, which remains consistent throughout the series.
- Have Hollyleaf and Jayfeather both still change their cat careers in the first book, but put place more attention on the fact that they basically switched jobs. Have a scene where they end up yelling at each other, because can't the other see how lucky they have it? The tension breaks when they realise they've both lost something important to them- Jayfeather his chance to prove he's as capable as a sighted cat, and Hollyleaf her path to helping her clan in the way she thinks is best. They commiserate together, and reluctantly promise to do the best they can with their lots, so they don't waste the path the other wishes they'd taken. This closeness is eroded over the series as they disagree more and more on the subject of StarClan and its role in their moral choices and obligations.
FOUR
- Speaking of Hollyleaf! I nearly threw my phone across the room when the first Omen of the Stars book claimed that Hollyleaf "worked so hard to discover her power to help her clan". Where, Ms Erins??? I would have LOVED to have seen that!! Hollyleaf expresses absolutely no concern over the details of what power she has/will develop, and only has a couple of scenes even touching on her ambitions to help her clan. She has some vague ideas about becoming leader and like one scene where she gets to do some leadery things, but that never gets followed up on. What does happen is that the whole "warrior code" thing becomes more and more a part of her personality (for no clear reason) until she snaps.
- Hollyleaf going off the deep end is something I wanted so badly to get into and be moved by, because I could see where it comes from! Her moral certainty is fascinating, especially since it's based in something as abstract as the warrior code- which, when you think about it, isn't really... anything. There's no concrete set of rules that make it up, no traditional wording or cat philosophers, not even any fables. It's a handful of agreed-upon, common sense rules- don't cross boundaries, don't take prey that isn't yours, respect your ancestors, and don't murder. That's it!
- So, combining the above points, I think Hollyleaf not being one of the Three should stay, but both the audience and the characters are given good reason to believe she is. By around the third volume, make it so that Hollyleaf has found that her power is to get cats to "Do The Right Thing"- i.e. what she wants them to do. She sneaks off often to see Sol, who teachs her how to use this power. Her siblings are concerned about this new power, having already gotten a glimpse at what Sol can do, but she's confident that she can only use this power for good. Volume-specific plot happens, Sol manipulates her into causing him to win, she is shocked and horrified, and vows to stick ridgedly to what she knows is right i.e. The Warrior Code
- However, the more fervently she tries to stick to this abstract idea, the less it gives her results, the more her power seems to be failing. Believing that StarClan is taking her power away from her, she becomes caught up in a faith-guilt spiral that puts her in the position to snap at the end of the series. By that point it's clear to her siblings that Hollyleaf has no power- she was just very, very good at persuading people to do what she wanted.
FIVE
- Lionblaze is a girl now because I Said So. This Cat Is Trans And There's Nothing You Can Do About It.
- Her relationship with Heathertail stays the same- childhood sweethearts who are torn apart as they begin to understand the nature of the societal divides that exist between them.
- This can be used to contextualise the whole "half clan/outsider blood" thing as a cultural contradiction. In reality, inter- and outer- clan relationships aren't at all rare. They can't be, otherwise the whole society would be inbred out of existence in like five generations. But if at least one society of humans can spend a good 200 years pretending Sex Is Bad And Sinful Actually then cats can have persistant cat-racism in the face of all logic. Heathertail clocks this contradiction, Lionblaze doesn't.
- Her relationship-to-power arc doesn't need changing all that much either, other than starting much sooner and being more consistent. At first, she's completely overjoyed by her power, since unlike her siblings, it lines up so well with her ambition- become the finest warrior any of the clans have to offer. As the berserker rage aspect becomes more prevelent, she becomes more and more disturbed by the fact that she isn't disturbed by what she can do, and that she doesn't want the escalation of her power to stop.
- Tigerstar still does his thing, but Brambleclaw knows about it. He recognises the signs from when his father used to visit him, and tries to train Lionblaze in his own way. She ends up caught between wanting to be a good warrior, and testing the limits of her power.
SIX
- Jayfeather can stay basically the same because he's my perfect little angy boy and nothing needs to change. His arcs can be strengthened by having a more robust relationship with Yellowfang where they try to out-bitch each other, and coming to terms with his internalised ablism. Maybe he has a chat with Mothwing about faith a couple of times. Him furiously lashing out at being offered help transitions into an acceptence and understanding of his abilities more naturally. He never stops being A Grumpy Old Man.
- All fucking past-lives unexplained time travel goes in the BIN. Doesn't fucking happen. You can have that lore dump sprinkled across the books, or come from going deep into the tunnels and having a surreal meeting. Make it properly eldritch-level scary, shake Jayfeather's confidence in the idea of them being just a bunch of ghosts.
SEVEN
- Have the way Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight present very clearly as parents to the Three be explicitly, textually unusual. One of the things I liked so much about the first series was an almost total lack of emphasis on who was mated with who, and who was related or not. It felt very real to how feral cat colonies form, where raising kittens is a communal job. This gets completely dropped the moment series 2 starts and now the cats have monogamy.
- This emphasis on the family unit and fostering close relationships between parents and kittens is deliberate on the part of both Leafpool and Squirrelflight. Their aim is to cover for Leafpool so she doesn't lose her role as medicine cat- something she already gave up Crowfeather for before she was pregnant.
- In that little bit of backstory, have a robust reason for both Leafpool and Squirrelflight to leave the camp while Leafpool is pregnant and giving birth, possibly one that ties into the present day story in some minor way. I don't know how, it would just make that element of the story a lot more ground than "we left, the kits were born, then we came back and everyone was cool with it"
- When it comes to the "I am Not your mother" reveal, Jayfeather and Lionblaze are confused and hurt that they were lied to, but come to the reasonable conclusion that well, since they were raised mostly by Squirrelflight, saw Leafpool often, and are loved by both, they don't hate her. Lionblaze has something of a crisis over being half-clan, possibly initiating an attempted reunion with Heathertail. Jayfeather is more concerned with how other cats will think it makes him lesser, something he's still sensitive too.
- Hollyleaf, meanwhile, completely fucking snaps at the way her mother Violated Part Of The Code. It's a completely irrational reaction, but expected because she's been growing more and more reliant on The Code for the whole series, and less and less stable in her attempts to aid her clan and train to be its new leader.
- Squirrelflight is the one to murder Ashfur. This is easy to work out while reading- she's literally the only one of the four with a motive who isn't a perspective character. The mystery is less around finding out who did it, and more about why she did it (it's very ambiguous as to whether it was an accident or not). The main tension comes from who finds out when.
- Lionblaze is shocked, awed by how far she'd go to protect the three of them, and reassures her she did the right thing (as a way to salve her own uncertainty over her own longing for violence). Jayfeather makes it all about himself because he's Jayfeather- upset that he didn't know immediately, instead of, you know, figuring it out in a few hours because he can basically read minds. They try their best to hide it from Hollyleaf, who is already rattling around the final volume as a full-on antagonist, but are unsuccessful. This almost costs them something incredibly important- possibly Squirrelflight's life.
EIGHT
- the whole plot with the Tribe Of Rushing Water is a MASSIVE can of worms that could be removed from the series without issue. As it is:
- Characterize the Tribe as uncertain of how to fight other cats, because yes, they haven't had to do this before. DON'T characterise them as pathetic, doing whatever their leader says without thinking, and with ancestors who have Given Up
- Have some of the Tribe be really good at the violence. Worryingly good. Have others be sickened by what they're being asked to do.
- Have some of the clan cats reflect on what they've done. Hollyleaf would be all for introducing this society to jesus The Code, but even she might be horrified at being thanked by a tribe cat who can't wait to get out there and win themselves glory, only to be killed a few hours later
- The Tribe begin a new tradition of marking the walls in the mud they use as camoflage in order to commemorate their battles, and memorialise the fallen. One of the characters reflects on the fact that in a generation or two, the Tribe will feel like it's always been this way. How many of their own traditions- those that feel almost like natural law- started out the same way?
- Have Sol as the leader of the invaders, or maybe having insinuated himself into the tribe as a "mediator" and doing his charismatic cult leader thing.
NINE
- Cinderheart isn't a reincarnation of Cinderpelt. She's just named after her bc Cinderpelt saved her mother from a badger. this is because I think the reincanation thing is stupid and I can't think of a way to make it good.
TEN
- No more using tails as hand gestures like covering people's mouths. Never. None of it. It's expunged from existence.
Disclaimer: I haven't read Omen of the Stars yet, so I can't account for anything that might happen in that series that's grounded in Po3. I'm like... two thirds of the way through the first volume. I'm Not Impressed.
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theflashdriver · 6 years ago
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Silvaze: Family
Word Count: 11,247
As you can see by the word count, this is probably longer than it should be but I had fun writing it! This fic is from a while ago, I really wanted to stretch myself and I think I succeeded in that! It focuses on the pair babysitting Cream for Vanilla, hijinks ensuring. Very few Sonic characters have an established family history but, of the bunch, I feel as though Silver and Blaze have the least connection to their parents. Blaze was raised a royal, even if she had parents they weren’t much around, and Silver being from a destroyed future likely lost his family early in life. Seeing them as sorta parents warms my heart and I hope it will warm yours!
Blaze was no stranger to the bizarre. She'd been born in a far-flung future devastated by a lava demon only to be reborn a princess of an alternate dimension and make friends two hundred years in the past to her previous life, but this situation raised a countless number of questions. She'd been asked to babysit Cream… Vanilla had asked the burning princess and guardian of another dimension to look after a child for the day. Granted Blaze and Cream had a friendship, the young rabbit had been one of the first friends she made there, but had there really been no one else in Sonic's time willing to look after the girl?
She arrived through a dimensional gate, created of the purple and grey Sol emeralds she carried with her. She wasn't alone on this new venture; Silver passed through the gate behind her; scanning our surroundings, looking to the afternoon winter sky and taking a deep breath. "The air's different here, I didn't really notice that until I'd been to your dimension. I guess it's less salty than I've gotten used to, less sulphur here than the future." She raised a brow at him and he panicked, just a little, scratching at his quills and looking away; "N-Not that the air here is better, just different! The air in your dimension is great!"
She shook her head and took his hand, grasping palm to palm, and began to lead him up the hill-path to Vanilla's house. "You're so naïve, I'm simply surprised that was the first thing you noticed; it's nothing to apologise for. You've only met Cream in passing haven't you?"
He caught up to walk beside her, "Yeah, a handful of times. She seemed nice and she has one of those things with her all the time… not the wisps the…" He pushed two fingers to his head, his nose scrunched, clearly trying his hardest to remember.
"A chao, yes, Cheese." Blaze continued, cutting him off before he could crumple his face any further; "Cream is a very delicate soul, very emotional so we should probably do our best to please her; she's not like Marine so I doubt there will be any issues if we do. We'll see her to bed relatively early and await Vanilla, her mother, returning. I believe we're to remain for the rest of the day so one of us will probably have to cook, but you've been practising, haven't you?"
"Oh, uhh, a little? I think I'd be fine, we'll just need to see what Vanilla has in." He scratched his head, she knew he would undersell himself; "Vanilla, Cheese and Cream, that's a lot of food names, isn't it? Is there a reason for that…?"
"…I don't believe there is, perhaps it's a family tradition of sorts." They arrived at the house's gate; it was a small and cylindrical bungalow style house with a wide yet stout red-tiled cone for a roof. The house looked cosy, warmth and comfort radiating from the circular windows almost indescribable. The walls were painted a bright dandelion yellow; homely would be the only way to describe it. Blaze led, rapping on the home's wooden door. She hadn't informed them of Silver's appearance, a surprise for Cream that Blaze doubted Vanilla would object to, as well as someone to rely on should things go poorly. Blaze was the princess of a kingdom, defender of the Sol Emeralds, and yet she was feeling more anxious monitoring a single child than she had in months. Cream was only a year younger than Marine and yet she seemed so much more delicate. It was as though a single mistake or disappointment could shatter her across the ground in a million tiny, crying, pieces.
As the door opened Blaze stood straight, alert with her feet close together but her stance wavered slightly at the sight. She was not met with Vanilla but some giant Crocodile, hunched double over in the small doorway. "Why hello there, you'd be the sitter ri- Eh? There's two of you?" The crocodile gestured between them with his gigantic forefinger before pulling himself back into the house, stubbing his long jaws against the doorframe. He roared into the house, "Vanilla! There are two of them, did you ask for two?!"
"As long as Blaze is there things should be fine dear." A far more recognisable, elderly yet delicate, voice sounded through the house.
"That would be me." Blaze introduced herself, gesturing to the hedgehog next to her; "And this is my partner Silver."
Her partner spoke up, "It's nice to meet you." A glance to Silver showed a sparkle in his eye as he looked up to the amphibian, it was clear to Blaze that he had never met anyone like this before… and to be fair to him Blaze herself hadn't met anyone like him either; her subjects were mostly koalas, far shorter than most inhabitants of this dimension let alone this person.
"Ahhh, partners, I can see you're very close even from here! A budding young love… I remember those days." With a gesture the crocodile, who was still yet to introduce himself, lead the way into the small house. Blaze couldn't help frowning, a red glow to her face. For a moment she couldn't tell what had given the impression … only to realise their hands were still tightly clasped; her thumb pushing down on his. Without hesitation she snatched the hand away, the redness now thoroughly coated her; a glance to Silver revealed a matching complexion though he refused to meet her gaze.
She gripped her hand, "…We should head in, Vanilla has somewhere to be; we can't dawdle." She made her way into the house, cleaning her shoes on the doormat.
"R-Right yeah. Got to help out." She heard him follow, stop, go back and clean his boots on the mat.
She arrived at the living room/dining room, a small wood fire crackled in the right corner of the room. Most of the furniture was wooden, the walls painted an eggshell green with what looked to be handmade pillows on a small corner couch as well as a bigger chair, assumedly for Vanilla. The floor was carpeted, before she could make any further analysis she was being hugged around the waist by a tiny rabbit. "Miss Blaze! It's so good to see you!"
She leant down, returning the hug; Cheese sat atop the girl's head. "Likewise Cream, how have you been doing?"
"I'm doing well! Mister Vector has been helping around the house; we've had lots of fun tea parties." She looked up to the crocodile, his giant jaws made him quite expressive. Right now he was wearing the cringing expression of a man who had been through ten too many tea parties.
Silver finally rounded through the doorway, Cream poking her head out from around Blaze's side. "Oh! Mister Silver! You're here too? Good afternoon! How is the future?" The Chao leapt from the top of her head, little wings beating, as it made its way over to Silver.
The hedgehog, having no idea what to do with a Chao, extended a hand out to it only for the little creature to float passed and begin to lose itself in his quills. "Good afternoon Cream, good… good afternoon Cheese. It's okay, it could be worse." While not a total lie the future was still far from fixed, no longer devastated by Iblis or Ifrit but devoid of life entirely; still it was kind of him to lie and spare the little girl's feelings; he had clearly been listening when she'd said to be gentle. As he reached up to pat the little Chao a fifth person entered the room, Vanilla with a tray of tea and some biscuits; Chocola latched to her arm.
"Hello, Miss Vanilla. I hope we’re on time?" Blaze greeted, slightly curtsying through Cream's grasp.
"Good afternoon Blaze, you were perfectly prompt do not worry dear. And this is…?" Vanilla had looked to Silver who was looking from Cream to her mother and back. Judging by his quizzical facial expression he was taking notice of the strong resemblance and was finding himself quite confused.
Blaze gently coughed, getting his attention. His ears perked up, chao currently fumbling over the left. "Oh, sorry. I'm Silver, Blaze's partner, it's nice to meet you Van- Miss Vanilla."
"It is very nice to meet you Silver." The rabbit's honey eyes turned back to Blaze, "Dear I must say you've progressed quite astonishingly. When we first met you were afraid to accept help and refused to make friends, but now you have a boyfriend? How truly wonderful!"
"…We don't have the kind of partnership Miss Vanilla." She didn't dare look to Silver, feeling the heat rise to her face and certain it would to his. That was twice in the past five minutes, but all other terms either felt too removed or too intimate. To call him friend was to put him on the same level as Marine or Sonic, to call him companion made it seem as though she were the main article and to call him her significant other… well, that made it sound as though they were married. Even using the term best friend felt too weak.
"Ah, I'm sorry; but it's nice to see you've made a… partner then." Out the corner of her eye Blaze could see a broad, almost jeering, smile on that crocodile's face; asking to be knocked off. Plainly thinking they were in denial… well, he wasn't wrong but to jeer so openly was enraging.
The princess steadied herself, closing her eyes for a moment. "Indeed it is, I'm glad to have him. Silver will be nothing if not useful today, I promise."
"Oh yes, right! We should be off! I've got a lot planned for this… err…" The crocodile's jaws seemed to twist as he fumbled for a word, behind it Blaze could almost see redness on his cheeks. "…Excursion, right, yes! This excursion!"
The older rabbit set the tea tray down on the table, smiling to Vector; "I'm sure it will be lovely Vector." She turned back to the pair, "She should be asleep no later than nine, and she'll probably need her bedtime story. I prepared a dinner quiche; though it is meant for two, feel free to help yourselves and make whatever you need."
"Understood." Blaze nodded, "Silver, do you have anything to a-
Looking to him she found he was distracted, Cheese had fallen asleep in his arms; being cradled like an infant. His ears had lowered, there was a gentle smile on his face and a light to his eyes; he looked thoroughly content staring down at the little creature. Something tugged at Blaze's chest; she tore her eyes away from his smile and coughed to get his attention. Suddenly, realising he was being spoken to, he let out a squeak of surprise and confusion; without looking she knew he was flustered.
He wouldn't have time to respond however as Cream, finally pulling herself away from Blaze, gasped and rushed over to him. The tiny rabbit grabbed his arm, tiptoeing to look at the sleeping chao in his grasp. "Mister Silver I didn't know that you were good with chao. Do you have one?"
"No he just kind of fell asleep on me, I've never even held one before today. It's… nice." Silver admitted, looking from the child back to Blaze, "I'm sorry what was it?"
Blaze was finding it difficult not to look back at him, there was something, dare she even think it, adorable about this situation. Ever since he'd returned his steady adaption to life in the Sol Dimension had been wrought with such moments, from being overjoyed at sleeping in a bed to playing in the sea. Blaze still wasn't used to feeling like this, guarding the sol emeralds was far less draining. She turned to the older rabbit, "It's fine. We'll be fine Vanilla, I give you my word."
"I'm sure you'll both do wonderfully dear, try not to stress yourself. Vector?" The crocodile looked to her, Vanilla approached him; arm extended for him to loop. Without the slightest of hesitations, a mile wide and rather intimidating smile on his face, the crocodile took her arm in his own; dopey giggling emanated from his person. Chocola clambered its way up, sitting atop his arm. "I'd hope to be back before ten, but we shall see. Be good for them Cream."
Cream turned from petting Cheese in Silver's arms, "I will be, have fun on your date. You too Mister Vector!" The child spoke so innocently yet so bluntly, the gator went from green to red. Blaze couldn't help smiling as Cream, likely unknowingly, had avenged her.
The crocodile seemed to be in a world of his own for a moment, sweat poured from him and his pupils dilated. "W-Well yes, it's important to take breaks from detective work I-I'm sure we'll have a wonderful time on our d-d-date! B-Be good for them Cream… I-I'll be good to your mother; she's in safe hands you know. Safe hands! If anyone starts any trouble I-I'll rough 'em up, I'll throw an extra punch just for you!" And with that he began to stomp his way out the house, pulling a smiling Vanilla with him. With the slam at the door the group dropped from five to three, the pressure was on; for a moment silence ruled throughout the home.
"Well," Blaze led, "I suppose we should take tea first?"
"R-Right, yes tea." Silver sounded behind her, "I'm a little stuck." Turning to him she found the chao had, rather than lie in his arms, latched onto his chest fur in its slumber. He clearly embarrassed and thus, by proxy due to the adorable nature of the situation, so was Blaze.
Cream, however, seemed rather enamoured with the situation, returning to her tiptoes. "Cheese doesn't normally sleep on other people Mister Silver, it must be because you're so fluffy! I can get him off." Silver crouched low; arms still folded to support the chao's lower half. The little rabbit gently began to tickle the chao, prodding around his belly, moments later Cheese shifted from Silver and latched onto Cream's wrist. Silver's arms finally uncrossed, with a flick of the wrist three chairs pulled out from beneath the table. Cream, slightly in awe, hurried over and pulled herself up; chair pushing itself in through the hedgehog's will alone. "How do you do that Mister Silver? It's so cool!"
"Oh, it's just a little something I've always been able to do." He shrugged, trying to play it off, but Blaze could see a light in his eyes, a smile on his face; she could already foresee him showing off for the tiny rabbit. Marine had quickly fallen in love with Silver's powers, the ability to make her ships fly was worth more than his weight in loot to the Racoon, and already the cat could see Cream going the same way.
Blaze took her seat at the head of the table and felt her chair gently pull in beneath her. As predicted, the hedgehog used his power for minor tasks all the time but rarely so forwardly. "Thank you, Silver." He took the seat opposite, naturally floating it in beneath himself.
"How are your classes coming along Cream?" Blaze began to pour the tea; "The last time I visited I believe you were starting your times-tables?"
Chao assumedly now in her lap Cream took her cup and saucer, "Thank you Miss Blaze. I think they're going quite well! My mother's still home-schooling me, there aren't enough children nearby for a proper school but sometimes Tails comes over… he's really far ahead of me though, even Mum has trouble keeping up. Charmy started coming too but he really didn't like it, he kept doodling and shouting. Mister Vector said he can't come to class anymore." The rabbit pushed her forefingers together, "It's impolite to say but… he wasn't a very good student. It's been a little lonelier without him and Tails is just so busy helping Sonic..." Cream's ears seemed to droop at that but, as if to muffle it, Cream took a quick sip of her tea before beaming up; first to Silver before focusing in on Blaze; "That's why I'm so glad you could come to look after me!"
Having heard all of this, the tea poured, Blaze threw a glance to Silver; one of the biscuits hanging from his mouth their eyes met… she could tell he was having the same thought as her but the Princess wasn't settled on whether it was a good idea. Passing Silver his cup Blaze couldn't help but ask; "Cream what age are your closest friends? Do you many near you?"
Cream paused for thought, her ears crossing and uncrossing behind her head as her brows rather adorably knit. "Well, Charmy's my age and Tails is two years older, they're the closest to me. Then it's really just you and Amy, much older than me. I guess there's also Mister Big but…I'm not even sure how old he is. I know some others, like Mister Sonic and Mister Knuckles but… I guess most of my friends are a lot older. Why do you ask?"
The cat's brows furrowed, she looked back to Silver again but clearly, the tiny rabbit's words were hitting him at his core; his judgement would be clouded… though understandably so. She took a sip of her tea, gave it another moment's thought but, eventually, she decided the potential good outweighed the bad. "It's just that we have another friend around your age in a similar situation, a racoon named Marine. She's quite… excitable, I'm afraid she may be too much for you, but I believe she'd appreciate your company. I could return to my dimension and retrieve her if you wanted?"
"I'd like that a lot Miss Blaze!" The young girl's eyes were sparkling but they quickly dropped to into her lap, hands clasped atop the table. "I-I mean, if you do think it's a good idea and it's not too much effort. I don't know how hard it is for you to move between dimensions and all, I-I don't want to pressure you... but I would really like to meet a girl my age for once." She was still trying to be so polite, clearly fighting back some kind of excitement.
"She's a whole lot better at it than I am at time-travelling, Blaze can get here way easier than me." Silver's teacup began a psychic ascent toward his mouth, a broad smile on his face. "Marine's pretty loud but that's just her way of being friendly, she settles down a little when you get to know her... not much but a little bit certainly. She'll surely want to recruit you into her crew."
Cream blinked at that, throwing him a perplexed glance; "Crew?"
"Oh, she's obsessed with boats and sailing; she calls the people she likes her crewmates." Silver explained, tea now tipping from his cup and floating as a globule in the air the beige liquid took the form of a simple boat, like a child's drawing with a hexagon for a base and a simple flag for a sail. It was a lot of effort to emphasise a basic point but as Blaze watched the rabbit's eyes light up and his match she knew the pair were enjoying themselves. Despite knowing him for so long she still couldn't help finding the freedom with which he used his power so endearing… even if it made for some rather awful table manners. "I can never tell if she wants to be a pirate or hates them or if it's just that she hates other pirates? She's probably never seen a chao either… right Blaze?"
"Indeed, they aren't native to the Sol Dimension; it seems they're exclusive to this one. Though now that I think about it…" Blaze's rubbed her chin, "I don't think she's ever been to this dimension. I've come on business and otherwise never thought to extend the invitation. I suppose it's about time she visited." She'd have to insist the racoon was on her best behaviour but otherwise things should go smoothly, Blaze rose from her chair; drawing forth the emeralds. Now engrossed within polite company it wouldn't be a faux pas to travel indoors. She took some steps away from the table, drawing the emeralds together a fiery portal opened before her, she gave one last glance back to the pair, a small smile on her face; "Do look after Mister Silver for me Cream, he's quite insecure when he's alone. Don't let him eat too many biscuits; his sweet tooth gets the better of him more often than not."
She wasn't quite certain why she'd done it; it was more than a little childish… she resigned herself to the idea that, as Cream had never really met Silver properly, she was simply endearing the hedgehog to her. Regardless of why she had said it; his reaction made the choice more than rewarding. The tea ship immediately crumbled into a floating amorphous mass, his jaw dropped and redness overcame his face in a flash before his head dropped into his palms; he was making quite a lot of sound but not saying anything. Once or twice she heard the words "Mister Silver" in a bewildered tone.
 Before he could recover Cream, beaming innocently, responded; "Don't worry Miss Blaze, I'll look after him for you!" Silver's head rose at that, the globule convulsing like a manic maelstrom in his grasp, awash in pink he went to say something to the Rabbit only to bite his tongue and immediately whack his head against the table. The Rabbit reached over and pet the top of his head; "Oh…it might be harder than I thought."
Feeling herself begin to chuckle Blaze quickly stepped through the portal, deciding she'd wounded him more than enough.
"… just be nice and everything will go smoothly, don't tease her and don't pull her ears. You're to make a good first impression, you're slightly her older so be responsible." Blaze had just finished reinforcing the guidelines to Marine but the tiny racoon was being far less than attentive.
"Yeah yeah mate, no worries, no worries. To be honest she sounds like a right wet blanket, but I bet yer description ain't doin' her any favours. I'll just have to see for myself!" Marine, dressed in her usual earth tomes, was smiley and loud as ever.
The princess rolled her eyes at that, it wasn't that she'd understated Cream's fragile nature so much as she was accounting for Marine's bombastic attitude. Stood on the docks of Southern Island she clutched the sol emeralds in her palms again, conjuring up a portal, "Just don't make trouble for us please Marine, I'd like you to have a friend close to your age."
The racoon snorted at that, "What're you, my mum?" She took a deep sigh before cooing, Blaze could already tell what was coming, "D'awww are we gonna be a little family mate? Doesn't that make Silver the dad?"
Blaze was regretting this already but she'd made a promise to Cream, a promise she couldn't turn her back on. Even if things went poorly they had to give this a try, both of them needed more friends. Ignoring her last comment, biting back embarrassment, Blaze took Marine's hand and stepped through the portal, arriving back in that light green room half an hour since she'd left it, but something had hanged. The table and all four chairs were gone, a shadow on the floor where they should have been. Following the darkness to its source Blaze found the seating arrangements had ascended two or three metres and been coated in a cyan aura.
Above she could hear Silver, nattering away. "Yeah, the sol dimension is full of really pretty islands? Blaze has shown me a bunch of them but there are so many more, I love living with her now; having a bed is so nice."
Blaze felt herself flush, refusing to meet a taunting gaze she was certain Marine was throwing her way. Cream responded in a rather confused tone; "They don't have beds in the future?"
"Well, none like Blaze's." Right, that was enough, she'd been tickled pink but now she was surely glowing red.
Blaze "Silver, Cream, we're back. Can you two come down?"
"Oh, Miss Blaze! And you must be Marine!" Rather than wait the rabbit dropped from her raised chair, ears fluttering as she slowly descended toward the ground; a packet of biscuits in hand. Slowly the seating arrangements followed suit, Silver loosed himself from his chair and landed next to the rabbit; Chao once again stuck to his chest fur. Immediately the rabbit, a good two inches shorter than Marine not accounting for ear, extended a hand to the racoon; "I'm Cream, it's very nice to make your aqu-
"How come everyone gets to fly but me! How'd ya even do that eh? Flying with your ears, it's pretty amazin' but doesn't your head fill with air? Can't be a good sound." Marine, rather roughly, grasped the tiny rabbit's hand and shook it thoroughly. "I'm Captain Marine, I'm sure my reputation has proceeded me but since it was carried by these lovey-dovey idiots I'll have to reintroduce myself! Gonna be an uphill battle to get'cha on my side but don't worry, Blaze was talkin' my ear off 'bout how you're soft but if you can fly you must be pretty tough!"
Blaze could see the young rabbit's eyes spinning, Marine's constant babbling was beginning to take its toll but Cream was maintaining a stiff upper lip. "Why thank you Mi- Captain Marine. I-
"Oh, I like you already! Usin' my proper title, hardly anyone ever does that, you're on track to join my crew already mate; I could use a lookout and with those ears you could do much more than lookin' right?" Finally Marine stopped shaking the rabbit's hand only to immediately sling an arm over her shoulder and start walking her toward the couch; it was as if she owned the place. Before Cream could even answer Marine was talking again, "I can't believe it took comin' all the way to another dimension to meet someone else… how old are you?"
"Oh, um, I'm six. A-and yes! These ears are good for listening to. Would you like a biscuit?" Blaze was keeping her eyes locked on the little rabbit; making sure Marine's antics weren't wearing on the little girl. Things were going better than she'd anticipated, though Marine was her boastful self it seemed her energy wasn't bothering Cream; granted the little rabbit had hardly gotten a word in but that was the norm when it came to conversations with Marine. Besides, Cream had dealt with Amy so often; surely she'd grown accustomed to longwinded talks about Sonic and perhaps that could be compared to Marine's speeches.
Blaze managed to pry her eyes away from the pair, nestled on the couch sharing biscuits, only to be met by Silver's broad grin; his eyes locked on the tiny Chao that clung to his chest fur. With one finger he was delicately petting it's little head, floating sleep symbol occasionally spiralling away as he brushed against it. Blaze hadn't paid much attention to Chao before but seeing it nestled in his arm, snuggling in for warmth, it was making her embarrassed to stare but she couldn't tear her eyes away. Finally Silver seemed to notice, "Do you want to try? Cream taught me how to move him, you just…" Silver gently teased around the edge of the chao's tummy and, with a little effort, Cheese disconnected from his chest fur and latched onto his wristlet; still very much asleep albeit less comfortable.
Blaze tried to keep her eyes locked on the chao, away from his broad grin. "I suppose I ought to give it a go, what should I do?"
"Just take my hand." He approached, gently in an attempt not to awaken the little creature, before extending a hand to her, held up in front of her face. Blaze took it, fingers gently brushing against his before interlocking and her thumb topping his. Now she couldn't help looking at him, he was too focused on the activity to even notice the closeness; bright eyes sparkling and a grin aimed at her. "Alright now you want to tickle his belly like you're pulling him towards you, it shouldn't be too hard. Just watch the little floating thing from his head, if that changes stop." Blaze gently began to tease the tiny creature's belly, keeping a close eye on the floating Z, only to be interrupted by the shouts of a young Racoon.
"Oh that is so like you two, any excuse to hold hands ain't it? I don't even know what that lil' thing is but you two are usin' it for handholdin', that's just typical." Marine turned back to Cream, "See neither of 'em will admit it but really they like each other a whole lot more than they say, I'm sure they're snogging behind my back but I can never catch them. Blaze probably only went to get me so she could 'av him to herself, I'm meant to distract you."
Blaze felt herself heating up; she kept her eyes on the chao and didn't dare look to Silver. Cream followed on from Marine; "Oh, my Mother and Mister Vector seemed to think they were together… and Mister Vector's a detective so maybe he detected it? I don't think he's met Blaze before though so that's really impressive! He says he's a really good detective but this is the first time I've really seen it." The innocence in Cream's voice, her fragility, was making this unbearable. Marine had endured Blaze’s wrath once and became stronger, albeit only a little, but Cream? Under the rabbit's protection, Marine had become unstoppable and, even worse, a bad influence. "It's okay Miss Blaze, this is all private stuff, right? Don't worry I won't tell anyone if you're embarrassed, I'm glad you've found someone you love!"
The princess was having more than a little trouble keeping herself cool, both for Silver's sake and the Chao that lingered between them. "Thank you Cream but, as I said before, we're not in l-
Before Blaze could even finish the rabbit had been pulled into a makeshift huddle with Marine, the closest of her long ears acting as the racoon's telephone as she snickered and whispered into it. Whatever she was saying Cream was listening very intently, her polite smile growing with each passing second; occasionally releasing giggles of her own. Finally, Blaze looked to Silver only to find his face awash with red, a wavering smile on his face and his eyes locked to the ground. The princess sighed, turning her attention back to the Chao; "Regardless we're not together." She attempted to continue the transfer but, likely due to the heat radiating from her body, the chao's bauble was flickering and pulsating from it's sleeping Z shape; Blaze didn't know much about chao but it was clearly a sign continued efforts would awaken it. "I suppose you'll have to look after him for a little longer."
"Y-Yeah, maybe we can try again later." He still wasn't meeting her eye; their hands lingered together for a moment longer before he awkwardly pulled back. "I'm not really sure what we're supposed to do now, do we just watch them or… I guess with Marine here we'll have to cook some more. It's lucky I don't need my hands right?" His eyes met hers for a moment only to quickly peel away, looking back to the pair. "Marine, have you eaten?"
"Eh? Yeah, I'm eating fine. Don't get yourself in a tizzy." Crumbs were falling from Marine's mouth, coating her dress and the couch; half the packet of gingernut biscuits was already gone. Cream meanwhile was delicately nibbling a single biscuit, napkin in her lap.
Blaze quickly made her way over, drawing some napkins from Vanilla's tea tray before snatching the packet from the racoon. "Hopefully Cream's habits will rub off on you, despite being your younger she's far more mature." Before the Racoon could counter Blaze leaned in and wiped down the brat's mouth, then shifting to dust off her dress. "If you're going to act childish I'll have to treat you as such, I was hoping you'd act more maturely around your peer; try to set a good impression."
Marine looked away and stuck her tongue out, "Yeah well I'm a proper kid, and the captain, so it doesn't matter how I act. You're meant to be mature." Her arms folded across her body, she was clearly embarrassed at how she was being treated. "She'll learn from me rather than the other way around, soon she'll be actin' like us kids ought to; won't you Cream?"
"I, um, I-I guess? I don't really know what you mean Captain Marine." Cream admitted, her biscuit now concluded she began to gently fold the napkin to contain the crumbs. Despite being only one year apart the two truly couldn't be more different.
Her embarrassed pout transformed into a mischievous grin. "Ah don't worry about it, you'll be sailin' and shoutin' in no time. Just follow my lead and it’ll be bonza.”
Blaze rolled her eyes, the cleaning completed she turned to the little rabbit; a more serious look on her face. "Don't let Marine manipulate you. If she tries to make you act in a way you don't want just call me and I'll deal with her."
The little rabbit gently smiled, "Don't worry Miss Blaze, I'm having fun. It's a little weird to see you acting like a mother; it's very nice though. You're doing really well!"
Blaze's eyes darted back to Marine, that mischievous smile had grown into a full-blown maniacal grin. Subtly wasn't in the Racoon's wheelhouse, immediately Blaze knew what they'd been whispering about; she took a deep sigh. This had been a terrible idea, a very terrible idea, she felt her fist clench and heat rise... but as her eyes flickered between the pair, one openly guffawing while the other failed to hide her giggles behind a hand, she couldn't help softening slightly; the heat died down and she turned away. Still rather embarrassed her arms folded. "Well I see you two already have an inside joke, I'm glad you're getting along well."
"Oh mate we've got much more than that. Forget lookout I think I've found my vice-captain already!" The familiar sounds of crunching sounded from behind Blaze, she turned on her heel only to find the racoon had a handful of the biscuits. Marine was grinning, Cream looking down quite guiltily… albeit with another biscuit in her mouth. "She can do some real cool stuff with those ears of hers, flyin' and hidin' biscuits… way more powerful than makin' fire and throwing boxes around. Kinda makes me wish I had something…"
Blaze took the remainder of the biscuits, returning them to the bag but leaving her with one; making sure to point her scowl directly at the racoon… not that it did much good. Cream gently patted her new friend on the shoulder, "Well you have your boats, don't you? I could never even sail a boat, let alone make one."
At that Marine's arm wrapped around the rabbit's shoulder, pulling her in tightly; "Yeah you're right mate! My ship makin' skills are way cooler than anything anyone else has. I can make cannons and all sorts, nobody's got a power like mine!" She was smiling before a pout formed, her hand raised to her chin in a half attempt to cloak that smile. "Well… Dad's powers are pretty cool; he can make my ships fly! Mum's are just good for fightin', well and hugging Dad I guess."
The racoon tried to smile sweetly, but Marine couldn't really do sweet. Blaze's glare returned, her sheepishness at the titles was overcome by the insult toward her pyrokinesis, by feeding her embarrassment to her rage she hoped to avoid showing any weakness. "Marine, stop it. You've not been here half an hour and already you're causing trouble! Just be good and-
"Blaze's power is much cooler than mine, what're you saying?" Silver had cut in, stopping Blaze's anger before it could overwhelm her he'd taken a step into the group; tiny chao awake but in a sleepy haze as it clung to his arm. Of course, as the children had said it so often, he'd taken on saying cool despite talking about her power. "She can make fire from nothing, light entire rooms and warm the coldest of places. There's no way my powers are better than hers." He'd always been more than a little defensive when it came to her powers, from the first day they met, but she knew it to be the truth; he had always liked her powers.
Marine, didn't focus on that part though, instead bursting into laughter; "You didn't even deny it! Neither of you did! That's amazing, aww mates, I can't believe it. Blaze is the strict mother, Silver's the softy dad."
To her credit, the newly awakened Cheese floating from Silver back to the tiny girl, Cream was attempting to limit her friend; patting her back, "Captain Marine it's not polite to embarrass people, a-and yes while Mister Silver's powers are fun; Miss Blaze's are cool as well!"
"Mate it may not be polite but it's worth it for the reactions, just look at 'im!" Marine was pointing toward Silver and, almost on reflex Blaze followed that finger. She was standing next to him, thus only getting a side on view; his right hand was covering his eyes and upper muzzle but leaving little to the imagination. Embarrassment had surely overcome him before he'd even spoken a word in defence of her flames but he'd said it anyway.
He was shaking quite a bit, he managed to speak; "I'm just going to see what I can make for dinner, p-plan it now as in… I'll try not to use up too much of your mother's food Cream."
"Just help yourself, and… um… Mister Silver?" He'd already started to walk away, making for the door they'd entered the house through. The rabbit pointed to a door on the other side of the room, "The kitchen's that way… and don't be afraid of your feelings! Amy's always so open with hers, I'm sure you should be too!"
Silver quickly turned and made his way toward the kitchen, Blaze could see now the redness was on both sides of his face. How long would they be in denial about this? Perhaps for as long as Marine taunted them for it, but that could easily be as long as they lived, she certainly felt the implication that her feelings were being reciprocated but… did he understand that yet? She couldn't blame him if he didn't; she hadn't made it abundantly clear to him, outside her occasional blush and embarrassed tension the only real indication had been the suggestions of others that they were together. Perhaps it was time to take a more obvious step… but just what kind of step she had no idea, this was so new to both of them but Silver was typically the more openly emotive of their pair; did it not make sense for him to lead?
Blaze shook herself free from thoughts, turning back to the children; now wasn't the time to consider such things, she wouldn't have acted today; especially not with Cream present let alone Marine. They were whispering back and forth, giggling all the while; naturally, Blaze could only make out what Marine but she was the more problematic of the two. She lowered herself into, what she assumed to be, Vanilla's chair. There were a couple of simple books on the tea table before her, one a colouring book with crayons scattered… this was all a little surreal. Neither of her lives matched up with this, her most recent life had been one of cold isolation in walls like these but her first had a sense of comradely without the protective warmth these two were experiencing; chao clambering their shoulders in an attempt to join the conversation. Despite how alien it was to her something about this felt right, sitting in the chair watching two little girls become fast friends, in such a domestic setting. There was something almost serene about-
"I think I'll just make omelettes, side them with some salad. Does that seem alright?" She turned to see Silver, head poking out the kitchen and a gentle smile on his face.
Immediately Marine's taunting hit Blaze again, she was in this position… the seat belonging to Cream's mother while he had been planning dinner. She'd been so content in this position, so relaxed! There was something much too domestic about all this, much plainer than the lives they'd lived before! The thought that this was comforting was too bizarre! Blaze sprang from the chair and steeled herself by turning from his gaze. Cream tried to call out only for Marine to beat her to it; "That'll be fine Dad! Can we have dessert too?"
The princess shouted before her partner could reply; "There certainly won't be if you continue this path!" Blaze frowned through the embarrassment; arms folded and slotted herself onto the couch beside Cream. Trying her hardest to forget the racoon's words and her prior comfort.
"Alright! We're almost done!" Silver's voice called from the kitchen, pulling Blaze from the admittedly boring book on Chao behaviours. Cream and Marine had long dropped from the couch to kneel at the tea table, Cream colouring in what looked to be a parrot while Marine had torn out and flipped a page to doodle what could only be described as pirates and pirate-esq things. At the sound of Silver's call the racoon bolted to her feet, charging toward the dinner table, only to stop as she passed the kitchen door; falling to the floor as laughter overtook her.
Cream, quickly wandering over to support her friend, hesitated at the doorway; covering her mouth with her eyes wide. "Mister Silver are you okay? Would you like me to help set the table?"
"No don't worry Cream, just take your seat! I'll use my psychokinesis, it'll be way easier." Blaze had risen, began her approach, when the subject of the racoon's laughter and the rabbit's confusion became clear.
Silver emerged from the kitchen but, over his chest, was a pink apron that could only be described as garish. It was clearly made for Vanilla; with every step it threatened to trip him, the outline of his boots consistently appearing as he shuffled forward. Blaze had to tear her eyes away from the sight; she felt a heat flare on her cheeks. As she looked to the table four plates and sets of cutlery wrapped in his cyan glow arranged themselves atop the tablecloth; closely followed by a pitcher of apple juice and four glasses. He was embracing this domesticity even more than she was.
All four chairs pulled themselves out, the children clambering up them only to be magically pushed in, but Blaze felt a tap on her shoulder… she turned to face him again, still very red… but so was he. "I… um… eh… can't seem to get this off. I somehow go the strap over my quills but…" He was gesturing to the band around the back of his neck, looking at the length of his quills compared to the wideness of the gap it was rather impressive he'd gotten it on in the first place; while it hung loosely on him and exposed his upper chest fur getting it over those two giant prongs that hung from the back of his head must have been near impossible. Blaze approached from behind, the lower back strap was already undone thus all she had to do was help him get it around his head. Her temperature was continuing to rise but she fought through it, her fingers brushed against his chest fur for a moment but she quickly snatched them away as she raised the strap.
"Honestly mate, he was only in the kitchen for a half hour, can you not keep your hands off him? We're trying to eat here." Marine whined, "Well… I'm not… I need my tomato sauce. Silver! Get the tomato sauce!"
"Marine be quiet for a moment. If you need it so badly get it yourself." Blaze hissed, vision completely obscured by Silver's head of hair. Pushing down the quills with one hand she attempted to pull back the hem of the apron without choking him. With some effort the apron finally came off but as she pushed it over her head her elbows met with the top of his shoulders; arms almost wrapped around him. Blaze quickly released her grip, pulling away an attempting to further shake the thoughts from her head, Silver passed by to hand up the apron only to unveil Marine glowering at her omelette… clearly still wanting that sauce. Meanwhile Cream was waiting patiently for the table to fill, having tucked a napkin into her collar and cut off a corner of her omelette for Cheese. When Silver re-entered Blaze's vision he had the ketchup bottle in hand, with a hand to the shoulder Blaze stopped him; "If she wants it she'll get it herself, we're babysitting Cream; not Marine. She needs to learn to either ask properly or get it herself." Silver did stop though; his eyes went from her to that of the pleading racoon, Blaze kept her hand securely placed on his shoulder, Marine knew all too well how to manipulate the hedgehog and so the princess would have to assert her will. "If she doesn't learn manners now she never will."
The racoon unleashed a loud groan, fist pounding on the table; head thrown skyward. "Fine! Please can I have the tomato sauce? There; is that good enough?"
Silver looked back to Blaze, he'd been soft on the bratty child since they first met but coupled with said child's prior description of their roles his own pleading eyes were coating her further scarlet. Blaze quickly looked back to the racoon, releasing Silver's shoulder, "It will do but I expect it to be maintained." The moment the bottle was in her possession Marine, having not even tried the omelette, drowned Silver's cooking in an ocean of red. Blaze could already foresee the fight to make her eat the salad…
A blue light gently tugged her seat in beneath her, she was met with the scent and sight of Silver's cooking; something she'd become rather accustomed to. It was a simple dinner but he'd clearly put work into it, a speckled brown pattern dotted the yellow to show it had been perfectly cooked and the layers were slightly separated by a filling of diced pepper, mushroom and cheese. "Thank you for doing all of this Silver, you only had to cook for two of us you know."
"Ah, yes, thank you so much Mister Silver! I'm sure it will be wonderful." The polite girl pierced a chunk of her omelette, holding it out to Cheese to take. The tiny creature was struggling but slowly it managed to tug the foodstuff from the fork.
He'd finally pulled himself in, floating to meet with his chair as it pulled beneath the table. "Your both welcome, I gave them my all. I guess we'll take Miss Vanilla's quiches back with us? We shouldn't let her effort go to waste." Immediately, rather than use his hands, his knife and fork began to float; cutting the dish into chunks for him to inevitably float to himself rather than actually utilise a fork. Playing with his food, as usual… endearing but incredibly poor table manners, she doubted that habit would ever leave him and perhaps, deep down, didn't want it to.
"Indeed, it would be rude to leave them after her offer." She took her first bite, cutting off a corner piece, and immediately the flavour took her in. The texture was soft but, rather than melting in her mouth, with each bite the slightly salty egg parcelling would fall away and thus more of the interior taste of vegetable and cheese exposed. The flavour wasn't overwhelming but the piece blended together nicely; it all, once again, proved the lengths he'd gone to preparing this meal.
"Mates you're not even eating it right, you've got to use the ketchup to make the vegetables go away!" Marine was only adding more tomato sauce to the dish as she ate, meanwhile, Cream was slowly and politely working her way through the dish; following a more omelette based portion switching to the salad. The continuous sounding of ketchup squirts was wearing on Blaze's nerves but things would only get worse. "Oi Cream, try it try it!"
Blaze went to stop the racoon, "Cream you don't have-
"Okay, I'll give it a shot!" And without hesitation the rabbit took the bottle and promptly spread a lake of sauce across her plate, she would have painted every inch had Blaze not reached across and gently pried the condiment from the rabbit's hands.
"No more of this, I hope you've not wasted your meals and thus all of Silver's effort. Think before you act, you will finish all that you can." Immediately Cream's lip began to quiver, her honeypot eyes almost seem to grow. Blaze held her ground but then whimpers began, Cheese landing on the tiny girl's shoulder and attempting to console her.
"Well... if it's that bad now Vanilla's cooking is still there right? That'd be fine wouldn't it?" Of course, Silver was still going soft on them; he shrugged. "It's fine, they're just omelettes. Don't upset yourself Cream." A glance toward the little rabbit showed she had bounced back, forcing her way through and the dish at the cheering of Marine and Cheese.
Blaze turned back to her partner. "Silver it's the president of the matter, they need to learn lessons and get experience hardship to grow. They should be eating properly, with good manners, as I'm sure Cream usually would." A glare was shot toward Marine only to be met with a stuck out tongue but Blaze's eyes were drawn elsewhere by a movement. Two chunks of omelette floated toward him; sandwiching cucumber and lettuce between them. The hypocrisy that lived through the exception that Silver was caused her to sigh. "So should you most probably, to set a good example."
He blinked at that, a brow rose, and the makeshift sandwich vanished into his mouth. "Eh? Oh! You mean like when I eat with Gardon and shouldn't use my powers? Am… am I doing that to teach him good manners? I thought he was older." Though clearly confused Silver's aura did vanish and he finally, physically, drew forth his knife and fork.
Blaze shook her head. "No that's-
"Nah, that's cause he's a stickler for formality and all that. Doesn't even like me callin' him mate." Marine, not incorrectly, explained before looking back to the Princess. "Yeah Grampa is a real stick in the mud, he's great and all but he's a wet blanket."
The cat's grip tightened around her cutlery, mouth opened, only to hear a high pitched screeching noise; looking to its source she found Silver. His head was down though not far enough to totally hide his redness, in his embarrassment he'd cut too deeply into the omelette and skid the knife's edge across the ceramic plate. "S-Sorry…"
She sighed yet again, allowing herself to forget Marine's last line and instead turning her attention back to her own plate; continuing to eat. She'd been so distracted she'd fallen far behind the rest of the table, focused on eating she tried to ignore the children's whispers; only hearing the likes of "It isn't working anymore so you have to do it, come on…" and "Just do it, don't be a wimp, you won't get in trouble." After much more muttering Blaze finally looked up to the pair, Cream froze like a deer in a set of headlights while Marine tried to keep whispering into one of her giant ears.
The tiny girl clamped her eyes shut, fists clenched; "S-Sec…Second Mum, I'm s-sorry I made a mess of dinner! A-And I'm sorry for what I-I did to your food D-Dad but I'll f-finish it!" With that done she beamed to Marine who was already beaming back before both their eyes stared to us. On one hand Marine was rapidly tricking innocent Cream to follow in her footsteps but in the other, it was good and nice to see the two getting along, perhaps even as a result in the natural difference between their personality.
Blaze took a deep breath, rolling her shoulders to relax, and closed her eyes; the only way to break through this was maturity. She took on the air of a princess. "As proud of yourself as you are Cream, and I am glad to see some confidence from you, I'm afraid Marine has long run this joke into the ground before you. Please do not continue with it." Her eyes opened only to find them laughing at Silver, assuming his usual face in hands and totally red embarrassed demeanour. Well, it had been worth an attempt. Her eyes locked to Marine's plate, the omelette was gone but in the wake of the red devastation all of her salad remained. "Marine, eat your vegetables." The racoon was turned back to Cream and while her ears had twitched at Blaze's word she was clearly paying them no mind. "Well, you're not leaving the table until they're gone."
At that she threw her head to the sky and heaved a groan; "Mate I may be callin' you mum right now as a jape but you aren't actually my-
"No, if you're going to put me in this position then I'll have to act as such." Maintaining her cold outward demeanour, distracting herself from embarrassment by cutting her food, she pushed on; "You're eating your vegetables, we're not having this argument."
The racoon's face had turned, transforming from a smile into a pout; "It's no fun if you're comfortable with it, fine; I'll eat them Blaze." She started to grumble loudly, dragging lettuce leaves through the tomato see and consuming them with a twisted and disgusted frown. She was bearing her teeth, eating with her mouth open, but at least she was eating. Cream meanwhile was eating away, still a good quarter of her omelette remained. Silver had just about finished but currently still had his head down, his ears had folded and pinkness was still on his face.
Dropping the act she gently kicked him beneath the table, catching his eye she gave a nod of… attempted reassurance? This was all just as embarrassing for her as it was for him, she was just better at keeping it internal, but making sure he knew this was a mutual feeling was important. It seemed to work regardless as he returned the small kick, straightening up and retrieving his cutlery albeit still being hued slightly pink. By the time she looked back from Silver something bizarre had happened, however… Marine's vegetables were gone and Cream was rapidly working her way through a pile double the size it had been. The racoon was maintaining her prior face of disgust, arms folded across her chest and looking away.
"Cream, return Marine's salad." Without blinking Blaze continued her meal.
"S-Sorry…" Cream sounded.
"Eh, we gave it a shot mate. We'll get through this one way or another." The racoon reassured.
Completing the relatively light dinner took more than an hour; far longer than it should have, but finally Marine swallowed the last forkful of lettuce. Cream had long excused herself to go play outside, Silver accompanying her, and so the last few mouthfuls had been fought through a cold stare down rather than Silver's more gentle tactics.
"Was that really so difficult?" Blaze sighed, collecting both her own and Marine's plate.
"It really was mate! What's the point in keepin' me cooped up in here over a couple of leaves? I should be out there, runnin' free!" The racoon hoped down from the table, heading straight back toward the door. "I've got to show her how to be a proper pirate, a good one, not a rubbish one! She can hardly crack jokes without breaking in two, looks like she's gonna cry over the tiniest things; I've got to toughen her up! Soon she'll be a proper pirate with me!"
Blaze hesitated at that, "So, would you say you've become fast friends with Cream?"
Marine turned back, the smile had returned to her face. "What? Oh yeah mate, she's great! As I said, she's soft as jelly, but I see real potential and she's a nice enough lass. It's nice to you know…" She paused, rubbing her chin, "You know what mate? You were right; it is nice knowin' someone my own age. So um… thanks, I guess?" And without another word Marine rushed off, Blaze could just hear her shout to the pair as she made it through the door.
There was a small warm feeling in Blaze's chest, she was glad this had all gone so well; for as much of a brat as Marine had been, she'd successfully navigated the fragile landscape that was Cream's personality. She quickly washed their dishes, Silver had already seen to both Cream's and his own (undoubtedly with psychokinesis) and made her way out. It was already dark, while there was no snow by the wind Blaze could tell winter was truly upon them. She looked to the sky; clear, as Vanilla's house was in the hill countryside there was little light pollution even compared to the islands Blaze was used to. Casting her gaze across the environment she quickly found that familiar cyan glow, stationed atop one of the smaller surrounding hills by the shifting of his quills she could tell his vision was split between the pair (who she could hear running and laughing) and the sky above.
She quietly made her way over, aided by a combination of the light he emanated and the light of the full moon above. He was much too distracted when she approached, seizing the opportunity she gently slid a warm hand into his; her fingers slid into the grooves between his knuckles. He seemed to loosen a little as he felt her glowing warmth, eyes locking to hers, "Oh hey, looks like she finally finished then. They're just playing around, it's a game called tag I think?" Beneath them Silver had spread his grasp over a small range, creating a beacon of light the two would occasionally run through as they chased one another. She felt him return her grip. "The sky's really good tonight, you've not seen this one too often, right? It's different to yours… that's not just me imagining things right?"
Blaze cast her eyes to the sky, each cluster of stars lending its own light to the sky and augmenting the natural dark blue with brighter hues and twinges of purple; far more gentle and scattered than the way the moon brightened the night. But, as beautiful as it was, that was the same for every night sky she'd seen from the islands of her dimension. "I'm not sure what you mean Silver."
"Umm… it might just be me then, but…" Silver lowered himself to the grass and she followed, hand still in his, and pulled herself closer; giving another glance to be sure the children were still playing fine. His mouth had changed from a gentle smile to more twisted, he was really thinking hard about this. "Like seeing someone you know well but something's changed a little and you don't know what. It's not a bad change by any means it's just… different. They aren't the same stars we've been looking at together, they're repositioned and new, but it's still a wonderful sky." As he scratched at his quills she looked down at him, there was an uncertainty in his eyes but even through it they sparkled in the starlight. "That's probably really dumb… I guess I don't know how to explain it but… it's nice!"
Blaze looked back up to the sky, she felt his body shift a little closer; shoulder to shoulder he was embracing her warmth… she gently turned up the temperature, trying to regulate it despite her embarrassment. She thought about what he had said and couldn't help but draw some parallels between it and their current situation. The change was less literal, rather than seeing a new set of stars it was seeing one another in a different light; ways they hadn't previously considered. When she looked at the sky with that in mind she could begin to see it, patches where she thought things should be more clusters… the constellations she knew forming differently. "It was a naïve way to explain it but… I think I understand. It's not that you totally remember the night sky of prior nights so much as you notice that it's changed. That things aren't as they were and, while it's perhaps a little scary, it's also wonderful?"
"Seeing a different sky is scary to you?" There was confusion to his voice, perhaps she'd put too much of herself into that; she felt herself warm up further.
Blaze tried to push the thought aside. "Perhaps not scary so much as… different, but yes; I think I understand what you mean now."
"Oh, I'm glad." They would stare up at the sky for a while, enjoying the peace as a racoon and rabbit chased each other bellow, eventually her head tilted to rest on his shoulder and not long after she felt his head against hers. Her tail traced around his back, she'd just begun to purr when they were interrupted; the sound of Marine's whining bouncing off the hills.
Finally, she came into view, hand in hand with Cream with Cheese clinging to the rabbit's free hand. "Silver, mate, you can't be sittin' around hogging all the warmth. It's way too cold!" Without hesitation the racoon threw herself across Blaze's legs, immediately the hedgehog and cat were sitting straight, though their hands still interlocked.
Blaze frowned, "Marine you can't just-
"Silver was right, your power's great, just let me be warm! You can snuggle with him all you want, I just want my share!" The racoon was making herself comfortable by slipping between her legs and using them like armrests, much to the discomfort of Blaze. She was about to reprimand Marine when she felt a tug at her shoulder.
"M-Miss Blaze, I'm cold too. Can I…" The rabbit was clearly shivering, Blaze allowed her boundaries to be breached once again; raising her left arm, almost immediately the rabbit shot beneath it and leant into her warmth… and pushing Blaze back into Silver.
"See, mine may be good for moving stuff but Blaze's power is way better. I'm glad you both understand that now." She felt his head push back in against hers and with it her temperature continued to skyrocket. She wasn't used to sharing her power outside of with Silver and while this wasn't using an open flame it was still more positive attention than she was used to getting for them. She closed her eyes to focus, tried to keep control… only to feel something on the back of her head; leafing through her ponytail. "Oh, Cheese finally moved onto you."
She felt the chao's tiny legs kicking against her ear as the creature attempted to settle itself. Slowly but surely a yawning spell began to overcome them, first claiming Cheese before travelling through Cream to Marine and then, finally, to Blaze. With her the cycle began again though eventually the yawning would become more sporadic, random in its order. Blaze could feel wetness beginning to develop in the corners of her eyes, still looking to the stars, when she felt her partner shift his head from her shoulder; she looked to him but rather than meet his eyes she saw he was looking away. Had something happened? Looking to the other two she found them fast asleep, Marine's snoring loudly.
After a moment he spoke. "I…I-I really liked today, all of this. I know it was supposed to be a job but… it's made me think about some of this stuff."
"What stuff Silver?" More than anything Blaze was concerned, she reached out and touched his shoulder.
Finally, he looked back, he was clearly embarrassed but… there was something passed that. "Do you… I think… I-I know Marine was joking but the more I think about it…" Finally he went from concerned frowning to smiling. "I don't know when but one day I think I want to have a family like this." Blaze's eyes blurred, a heat shot through her warmer than any prior that night; what did he mean by a family like this? How important was the word like, was he really thinking that far ahead? They weren't even properly together yet, they were dancing around it like it was some kind of ticking time bomb, how could he be thinking about-
He cut off her train of thought. "Blaze you've gotten even warmer, i-is everything ok-
She cut him off entirely; "Yes!" She cursed her self for shouting, looking down to the pair. They'd shifted but neither had awakened. She began to whisper, "Yes that's… I'm glad you're considering these things Silver but it's a little… early."
"Y-Yeah I know it's just…" He was whispering too now, he'd leaned in far too close. "I-I really liked today, I've never been part of a family so seeing one was…" He shook his head, "We should probably take them inside. It's got to be getting late."
He went to stand but she kept her hand on his shoulder, holding him down. "I'm sure that there'll be an opportunity to do this again Silver and one day, maybe… yes, I think being part of a family would be nice."
He was tickled pink, visible in the moonlight, but there was a giant smile on his face. "I'll just carry you four in then. Try not to wake them…” All of a sudden, his ears dipped, “Oh, I didn't have to read Cream a bedtime story."
Blaze smiled, he'd gone from such a serious topic to something so childish and naïve. "Next time, alright."
And with that he'd extend his hands, gently the group would rise into the air and hover just above his open palms. He'd carry them through the doorway, having to rather difficultly twist the angle of their flight to get them through, before lowering the group onto the couch. Eventually Vector and Vanilla would return but, for a while longer at least, Blaze enjoyed having this brief family… even if it did embarrass her to think of it as one.
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lloyd-mills-blog · 8 years ago
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EGX 2017 Rezzed Trip
I went to the EGX on 31st March 2017 and I got to have a look at a handful of games in their prototype/beta state and even talk to some developers in the indie room. ----------------------------OCTAHEDRON Panel-------------------------------------------- (Enclosed in dashes because I go into detail about the game after looking up so many details  One game that I had a strong interest in was ‘OCTAHEDRON’, I saw the stand and recognised it from a previous EGX event 2 years ago. The developer of the game himself was in charge of the game setup there and we talked while I played his game. He had been developing the game for 4 years so far using GameMaker Studio, and he brought it to the last EGX event in 2014 for playtesting. Before making the game, he studied music and had a small background in coding, he taught himself code by watching Youtubers like Shaun Spalding and looked into the source code of existed games made with GameMaker Studio which is the same approach I was having to learning GameMaker Language code. For the music in his game, he collaborated with a Chiptune artist called ‘Chipzel’, who is a long time friend with the developer, and she appears to create the SoundTracks for games like Interstellaria and Super Hexagon and she remixed the original soundtrack for ‘Crypt of the NecroDancer’ and her remix became one of the many additional soundtracks for the game that people could buy. OCTAHEDRON was made using GameMaker:Studio and was put on Steam Greenlight 27th Dec 2015, it has been accepted to be put on steam, the game is made by a One-man indie game studio called ‘Demimonde’ which itself is run by someone who goes by the name of ‘monomirror’. It’s release does seem to be constantly pushed back, like the Steam Greenlight page stated 2016, the page for the game itself says Q1 2017. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I checked out lots of other panels around the Indie room. One panel was this game called ‘SureFooting’ Surefooting was a really nice looking game that looked right about finished, it was a side-scroll platformer where you pick 3 abilities and use them to navigate a level while a large monster try to hunt you down. The game features varying levels that get harder, like level 2 features a foggy city so you can’t see directly down, you can also pick 4 different characters and pick 3 of 16(more i think) power ups to use. I talked to the guy behind the panel and he said how he was a lecturer and he made this game as a night-job.
I also checked out this game called ‘Ealdor Light’, showing off a very early concept for a Randomly Generated Turn-Based RPG, the guy there told me it was made over the course of 4 weeks in Unity Engine, and it was going to have a kickstarter open up too. When I played the game, it was definitely far from completion but still showed what it had to off, as in the game you use your turn to move and attack enemies, attacking has you select 1 of four attacks and 1 of 4 areas to attack, while the enemies move and attack you too. I was also the third person that day to crash it and I’m proud of that. It looks like the game was brought over to EGX to promote the game during it’s very early production phase unlike the other games which all seem to be near completion. I actually did a little background check, same guy also made a game called ‘Sol Trader’, which had a kickstarter that had a 29 day funding period, 21/9/15 - 20/10/15, pledged £10,615 of £10,000 goal with 593 backers. Looking at how much of a solid game Sol Trader turned out, I’d say it’s pretty promising to see the end product of Ealdor Light I can see two different financial paths to game development here, the Lecturer already had a job to provide him with an income while making the game in his own time outside of work, while this other game is promoted and funded using kickstarter. I myself would rather get a job for income while I work on a game instead of relying on a kickstarter to cover the whole thing since kickstarter will only give you the pledge money if the pledge is reached. I don’t understand the best plan for putting games up on kickstarter but I do see a couple projects with games that appear to be far in production. I did go outside to check out the Careers bar and I got to see what work experience I could get for college and even what I could be doing after education. I’m still pretty set on completing Interactive Media and Games then seeing about doing Music so that I’m sorted for creating a game all by myself.
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mutantinthefamily · 8 years ago
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oh so tired
I previously mentioned Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, this is something I’ve had for a while but only recently has it become something more. I think that maybe because I have become more aware of it and also begun to receive more support and information. 
To be scientific, CFS causes persistent fatigue (exhaustion) that doesn’t go away with sleep or rest. CFS is also known as ME, which stands for myalgic encephalomyelitis (get your gob round that mouthful). It can be triggered by a viral or bacterial infection, problems with the immune system, an imbalance of hormones, psychiatric problems, such as stress and emotional trauma. 
I put my bout down to the joint pain and emotional stress. As really it’s obvious they all come hand in hand, feeding each other in a never ending perpetual cycle of misery. 
I first went to my GP complaining of fatigue about 4 or 5 years ago, and their response was for me to fill out a depression questionnaire on the computer. That didn’t go down well at all, because of course the answer is to stick you on anti-depressants and hope for the best. A nation popping pills to feel better, when really depression isn’t always the problem, it is just a side effect. Needless to say I didn’t pick up the prescription, I went for a fortnight in the Costa Del Sol instead. A dose of Vitamin D and Sea went down a treat, but it doesn’t last for long, especially when you arrive home to rain, but that’s a burden to bear when you live in God’s Own County. 
So last fast forward up to now, the pain and fatigue were getting progressively worse. So it was back to the docs to see if they could come up with something else, after a few blood tests to rule out my thyroid etc, I was referred to the Chronic Fatigue Clinic at Seacroft Hospital. I had an assessment with Carole Clegg, Occupational Therapist, and have been seeing her every month ever since. It has been a huge relief to finally have someone to talk to that has an understanding and can reassure me that I am doing all the right things to manage the condition. It has also been a help being able to talk to someone outside of family and friends. (just so I can talk about them all, right!) 
At the clinic you get a personalised treatment plan so this might include a physio, dietician and also CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy). So far I have just been seeing my therapist, I feel so American. Dealing with it through CBT, as I already have the diet in the bag and well I don’t want to see yet another physio. 
Through completing daily activity sheets, I was able to recognise where I was using different levels of energy. This helped me reorganise what I was doing in a day and highlighted activities that I probably didn’t need to do at all, so saving myself some energy for more important things. A lot of people talk about the ‘Spoons’ theory. The spoon theory is a metaphor used to explain the reduced amount of energy available for activities of daily living and productive tasks that may result from disability or chronic illness. Spoons are an intangible unit of measurement used to track how much energy a person has throughout a given day. Each activity requires a given number of spoons, which will only be replaced as the person "recharges" through rest. A person who runs out of spoons has no choice but to rest until their spoons are replenished. No I don’t have the cutlery drawer in my pocket but you get the picture. 
I don’t think I am a worst case scenario in terms of Chronic Fatigue as I have actually made progress very quickly, it is different for everyone, you just have to give yourself some time, some slack and know that you’ll get there in the end. I think I moved through the acceptance phase quicker because I had already had to do that with the hyper mobility. It might take someone else the whole treatment plan to deal with their acceptance. I think that is probably the hardest thing of it all. I was so hard on myself at first, but you know what that isn’t going to help change anything. Give yourself a break and look after your body, it can do wonderful things if you give it the chance and strength. 
It isn’t just physical activities that use up a whole lot of energy but also mental as well. So I decided to stop giving a fuck about things that weren’t important, things I actually didn’t like or want to do and also vampire people who sucked the energy out of me. Nobody wants vacuums, only radiators. Stress was and is the biggest factor that affects me, so the logical answer is don’t stress. Obviously I haven’t turned into a zen master that goes around smiling ALL of the time, I hate that. I just decided to be a bit more selfish so I could be selfless. If that makes sense, by not doing things I didn’t want to do, I could be more invested in the things that make me happy and in turn be a better person to be around. This is still a work in progress as you can imagine it’s not an easy thing to do in one go what with everything else. 
I am on 3 out of 10 treatment sessions, so a way to go yet, but already I am feeling better. At first I was totally devoted to my wellness, reading all these self-help books about happiness blah blah, watching everything I did and ruminating over everything in my life. But that did not help one little bit, so I stopped reading those books and stuck to fantasy stories, nothing like living out of reality. It’s been better being aware but not obsessive, I can take care of myself without having to think so hard about it, letting it happen naturally. 
I even went to an ‘event’ at the CFS Clinic, this is something I never do, as it is usually full of pity parties, apologies but there is no use feeling sorry for yourself because it won’t change anything. The only person who can actually help you, is you! Anyway I reluctantly went along, and was pleasantly surprised, I mean there were a few pity parties, but the most intriguing part of it all was listening to the guest speakers. One was a recovering patient and the other was the husband of a patient. It made me feel like I wasn’t alone and gave me an uplifting sense of hope. Getting support and speaking to others that understand is hugely important. But that doesn’t mean I will be frequenting all these meetings on a regular basis, no way Jose. 
I have always been brought up with the mentality to get things done and quickly so you can move on to something else. Time is money afterall. In fact, I think we are all conditioned this way, rushing around our lives, then in a blink of an eye it’s gone. I have been forced to slow down, I just can’t keep up with the demands of modern life and you know what I am glad. I can now appreciate everything so much more, taking a slower pace allows you to savour the moment. I have learnt that if something isn’t finished today, well I’ll do it later or the next day. It hasn’t just been me that has had to reassess they way they live their lives, but also my parents. They both have their own businesses and they are relied upon to keep it all ticking over and fast. We live in the instantaneous age, where if we don’t get something straight away it blows our minds! So what, just learn some patience and wait! What is so terrible about that? I think we would all be better off if we took a step back and just enjoy the small things. You never know you might actually feel less tired and happy. It’s okay to do nothing sometimes. Be warned I will probably rant on about this at a later point, no that’s a definitely. 
So to sum it up, I’m still tired and need a nap in the afternoon, but I am dealing with it a whole lot better. And I think once I get ironed out it will be break in the cycle and I will be pretty much human again. I will still take that nap though. Actually I think a house by the sea in a warm country, perhaps the Caribbean, would solve it all really. 
B. 
As everyone loves a diagram, here’s one to illustrate the perpetual cycle of misery. 
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