#ahem . ahem ahem. but WHATEVER

[marciliedonato]

Woah mama, teenagers scare the living shit out of me *hip thurst*😳😱😱😶‍🌫️🕺 << Gerard Way if he was Elvis

[rystiel]

that annoying moment when getting left for dead in the trunk of a car in your 20s comes back to haunt you 40 years later (take a shot every time ford says “stanley”)

[xunyicaos]

take my breath away 

lads sylus x afab!reader (18+)

word count: ~ 1.6k

content: pre-established relationship (admittedly obsessed with husband!sylus), not proofread, corn without plot, breathplay, pet names (kitten, sweetie, cutie), needy!reader, overstimulation, unprotected sex, p in v, reposted my old work from diff fandom

when you gasp it's like something snaps. 

your whole body quakes as euphoria floods through you, high-pitched cries tumbling from your lips and your nails leaving pretty red patterns all over your husband’s back. sylus is a pro at many things, but he's especially talented at hitting that delicate spot inside you for the third time tonight, flipping the switch in your brain that turns off all the thoughts focused on anything but him. 

you don’t remember how this started, whether you had a bad day or he did, or what precisely it was that has you a fucked out doll at his disposal. shit, you’re not even sure how your day went at all right now, but you aren’t complaining. 

on the contrary, you’re begging. your hole is sensitive, that's an understatement, but it’s still drinking in his fingers desperately. it's so good, so addictive when sylus fills you up, whether it’s his long fingers or his cock, your pussy craves more each second. 

but now sylus isn’t moving and your recovering walls feel neglected without his fingers massaging into them. “no, no,” you whimper, lightly smacking at his arm. “need more… wanna cum again.”

your hiccups seem to grab sylus's attention again, his crimson gaze heavy yet curious. somehow, even in your pleasured haze, you recognize the expression. he wants something from you and, of course, you automatically want to give it to him as soon as he tells you what it is. He pulls his fingers from you with a sloppy wet sound that has your eyes rolling, your hole clenching as though begging to be stretched again, needing to be filled. 

“sweetie,” sylus slurs, his voice intoxicatingly deep with a tempting lull to his words. “will you make that sound…” his voice catches, tense with his own growing arousal that's evident in the way his brows furrow as he tries to find his words. “make that pretty noise again for me.”

your brows furrow for a moment and you think you notice him using his wet hand to push his boxers down, the other traveling up to the base of your neck. he presses gently, tentatively, a tender massage that eases your breath, makes you comfortable enough to find your voice and ask, “what n—?”

the question catches in your throat, breath hitching beneath his palm as he squeezes. your eyes widen, an internal scream of I can’t breathe! causing your heart to skip a beat. but sylus’s grip loosens just before the panic fully manifests and oxygen floods into your lungs, the relief racing both up to fill your head and down to pool between your thighs. 

“that.”

oh. your thinking is still cloudy, sentences not linking together properly, words not articulating, but you think you know what he’s talking about. how fitting.

sylus fucking likes the sound of you choking, the melody of you gasping and whimpering, even more vulnerable at his hands than you already are. and, honestly, it works out, because you love the way it feels when he chokes you. you know he's at war with himself internally, weighing out his own pleasure and your comfort. always so thoughtful. you respond with your own hand resting gently on top of his, squeezing it as if to urge him to continue. 

sylus seems a bit relieved and he leans down to press a hungry kiss to your lips, catching your lower lip between his teeth before swiping his tongue over it and pulling back just enough to whisper, “so you like that, kitten?” he sounds a bit hopeful and if you could think properly, you’d say it was cute. 

“yes,” it’s a blend of a hiccup, a sob, and likely a deranged giggle. your hand flutters on top of his, pressing it down into your neck. 

that’s all he needs to hear. 

it’s as simple as a flex of his perfect fingers that gets you to keen, your movements in tandem with his as you hook your legs around his waist. your expression, the beautiful sounds leaving you, and the steady stream of bliss dripping from your hole—it has him hard and throbbing as he positions himself between your legs. 

you’d whine if you could, but your voice is hidden behind sylus's giant hand, your breath shallow. you see stars when he slides into you, the stretch making your mouth fall open in a stifled scream, drool trickling from the corner of your lips. you’re unable to take the breath you usually would, to steady yourself, to keep yourself from unraveling then and there. no, now you’re only able to clench, to grip him with your needy walls. your mind is melting and his oh-so-intoxicating voice only adds fuel to the fire. 

“you’re so beautiful, sweetie. always, but especially when you’re like this,” sylus groans, his hips rocking into a pace that has you silently sobbing, the pleasure overwhelming. it’s like both of you have forgotten the level of your sensitivity, your orgasms in the past hour brushed aside. the focus is on how badly you want more, more, more right now. 

sylus is creating a pattern, lightening his grip on your neck only to slam into you right as you’re trying to recover with a breath. “you like it when you’re fucked stupid, huh?” he pants between thrusts. “my kitten just wants to be full of my cock?” 

your acquiescence is broken up into too many syllables, otherwise reduced to gasps and fluttering lashes. your nails dig pretty red crescents into his arms, tears spilling from your eyes as your lungs are tempted again and again, the rush of air being abruptly stopped and sylus pounding into your pussy enough to drive you crazy, if you aren’t already. 

sylus is equally drunk on your pussy; the way it pulls him into your heat, how your walls massage his cock each time he slams into you. it always feels like he’s reminding you that your pussy is all his, just for him. it's always been his goal; by the end of these late nights all you can remember is him, his cock and how nothing will ever fill you as perfectly. 

“aw, my needy little kitten, can’t think of anything but how good you feel right now, hm?” you think you nod, your teary chin hitting the back of his hand as his grasp tightens again. “there you go, sweetie,” he groans, his half-lidded gaze drinking up your tears and gasps. “feel so good you can't stop crying, hm? oh you’re so beautiful. so beautiful and all fucking mine.”

maybe it’s something about the way your eyes roll back, your lips parted in a suspended gasp, the rosy flush that’s filled your cheeks—whatever it is causes sylus’s hips to stutter, pushing into you at a depth that, if you weren’t already suffocating, would take your breath away. 

he lets go, his hand moving to brace himself through his own climax as it mixes with yours and you break down into delighted gasping sobs. “sy,” your voice is hoarse, broken, but the way your fingers trail up and down his forearm proves that it’s all in bliss. “holy shit, you're so—so good, it’s so… it feels so good.”

sylus chuckles breathlessly, the rough pads of his fingers going to draw soothing circles on the reddening skin of your neck. “you’re too perfect for me.” he hums and trails kisses from your neck to your jaw, finally ending at your lips.

his kisses are soft, far more tender than the roughness of his fingers around your throat, each one planting seeds of reality in your thoughts, slowly bringing your vocabulary back together in a way that makes sense, but not enough to draw you out from the pleasure that still has you shivering. “you did so well, sweetie,” he soothes into your lips, taking your weary giggles into his adoring kiss. “you’re absolutely amazing.” 

there’s a beat of hesitancy and Sylus takes the time to slowly pull out of you, trying to keep his eyes away from the way your hole tenses, a milky stream being pushed out and drawn back in with every pulse. He settles next to you and pulls you into his arms, stroking your hair and steadying his breathing to help inspire yours to calm. 

“sweetie?” he starts and you can barely place the discomfort in his tone. “that wasn't…” his brows furrow as the words escape him and he almost looks sheepish when he meets your gaze. so out of character, yet so endearing. “i didn’t hurt you… right?”

the laugh that leaves you is a bit more stable, genuine in its amusement. words are still proving to be difficult, due to both the mental toll and the physical pull on your throat, but you think you can get the point across when you kiss him. “no... didn’t hurt. i liked it—really liked it.” 

relief fills sylus’s sigh and he kisses your forehead, a small smile on his face when he pulls away to look at you. his eyes scan your equally red neck and you absently doodle invisible patterns on his bare chest, peeking up at him through your lashes. 

“what is it, cutie?” sylus asks in that irresistible timbre as he studies your needy expression. He knows what you want, but he’s fully prepared to keep you in his arms for just a bit longer and, thankfully, you’re in agreement. 

“need… a lil’ break…” you admit, nuzzling into his chest with a soft sigh. “but…” you peek up at him again with an adorable amount of playful shyness that makes his heart skip a beat.

“i can go again.”

[cherrirui-official]

I hope u guys don't mind me posting these au doodles while I work on things ahaha

I also gave JD slightly longer hair in these doodles as a funny haha but I don't think it's funny anymore he looks genuinely good with his hair like that ahahaha I hope you're not mad at me for changing his au design a bit

[wukyma]

Just wanted to draw my Pelops with your Poseidon. Don't worry I know he's taken. But I really like your rather refreshing take on Poseidon. He's a bit more.. I dunno down to earth.

HE'S SO ADORABLE OH......

Actually, there's a Pelops ask somewhere but hhhhh so busy literally can't find time to breathe, let alone come up with a design 😭

Btw I don't think 'taken' is a status applicable to gods (except Hera ofc), so-

What actually happened ⬇️

Poseidon is weak for curly guys and so am I

[buckleydiaz]

i can read between your lines (dizzy from the spinning)

buddie | 4.3k | rated e

“So, theoretically,” Eddie sounds absolutely delighted, “if we didn’t know each other, you’d hook up with me in a public bathroom?”

“Theoretically—I mean, do you want a serious answer?”

Eddie hesitates for a moment.

“Yeah,” he says quietly, all traces of humor gone from his voice. “Tell me.”

“Probably,” Buck says. Then a little firmer—“Definitely.”

aka: Buck and Eddie have phone sex.

read on ao3

[localburntoutkid]

Listen, thinking about PJO Swap AU, but not like a parent swap, i mean whole character swaps. So, so hear me out- THE BROKEN TRIO: - Percy Jackson as Luke Castellan. But not in the conventional way - he's a son of Ares who hates him and all the gods for doing what they do. for leaving mothers and fathers everywhere heartbroken or worse like Ares did with his mother. Sally Jackson is not weak, but her situation is getting worse - visions of her baby boy dying, an abusive husband and a poor financial standpoint - she is the one that urges him to leave. to get out of this. to find camp halfblood. he leaves reluctantly, promising to come back and take her away soon. he finds a girl and a boy both stuck in similar situations and decides i'm going to take care of them. - Annabeth Chase as Thalia Grace. A daughter of Zeus who ran away from home after her already abysmal home life got worse with the addition of a stepmother. she almost kills Percy when she sees him and is otherwise wary of him for a while - but finds out they're made of the same steel. signs from her father guide her and Percy to a little boy with olive skin and dark eyes too smart for his age, and she decides that these guys are her family now - not the airplane-obsessed man at home or his blonde new wife. - Nico Di Angelo as Annabeth Chase. A son of Athena (or maybe blessed by Athena, not sure yet)who got separated from his sister after leaving the Lotus Casino. he's lost, scared and young. but he's going to make it out and find his sister, come what may. he's found by a weird boy with turquoise eyes that freak him out and a girl with unruly curly hair who looks like she knows everything. they look after him. he has a puppy crush on the boy - but he'll never, ever admit it. he sees them and decides that yes, these are the people he can depend on - and he'll grow up to be strong so they can depend on him too.

So it hurts when they reach Half-Blood Hill with their satyr - it hurts when Annabeth jumps to protect them, her new family - and dies for it. it's just more fodder for Percy's hatred because he loved that girl and now she's dead. nico mourns her like he mourns his sister, and he shares the grief that Percy holds. they start life at camp half-blood with a promise - i'll always be on your side.

@cceanvvaves @dreamboyinthedarkvoid @lovely-rants-alot @itsmylovedaydreamdreamdream @zufi @jerry-the-leech <- pjo mutuals that i remember ! i was Having Thoughts so here this is - feel free to ignore, sorry if i disturbed yall!!

[crimsonkat59]

The Infinights

The pixelated RPG game Infinights, developed by Tales From the Stinky Dragon, garnered many positive reviews from fans of the developer’s past works and soon brought in new fans, many of whom had never played a game of such style. 

Infinights is a story-driven game where you play as four ‘Infinight Interns’ trying to find the Infinights (a group of notorious heroes), defeat a devious woman called Paralyte, and save the realm of Faeza. There are many loveable NPCs scattered throughout the five realms of Faeza, each unique to their homeland. And the music changes throughout the land, even during encounters! 

What many have found interesting about the game is that the player does not control a specific character. The four Interns move as a group and the walking order of the players changes according to their environment (for example, Mudd leads the group through his home city of the BuhBayou while Kyborg will lead when they’re in Evirwinter). In combat, each Intern and their enemies are given a specific order to which they can take a turn. This is one of the many cases where Infinights uses luck and randomization to achieve unique playthroughs. Often, conversations will have dialogue options that will either succeed or fail based on the program’s virtual ‘coin flip’ and the amount of damage any attack will do it based on a ‘dice roll’ of sorts. 

Infinights has been praised for its simple but beautiful graphics and its simple design. However, it has gained criticism as well. 

One main flaw many players see is how rigid the story is. There are not many chances for exploration and though conversations can change due to luck, things end up the same in the end. After some time, the developers released an update containing a second playing mode. This mode, entitled ‘The Past’ (changing the main story mode to ‘The Present’), lets the player play in a more open-world concept. And as the original Infinights. 

What’s loved about The Past is that it allows the player to see more into the life of the characters the game is entitled after. There were complaints that, for being titular characters and the game’s main quest, the Infinights did not have a strong role in the story, especially Grislee and Elleve. The Past changes this, giving each Infinight more lines and a more fleshed out character. 

Of course, the open-world style is appreciated as well. There’s a fully interactable map to navigate through and many new locations within each city to explore. New shops, new NPCs, new quests. And while The Past has a few scripted adventures and quests, the easiest way to explore the world is to travel to one city and simply walk around. More quests become available as the Infinights become more renowned throughout Faeza, with more people also willing to aid their adventures. 

The Past also created thought. As the main villain of the main story, Paralyte, is seen in this mode as just another Infinight. She is primarily called ‘Luce’, which is her real name, and is visually different. Many have joked that she looks ‘healthier’ in The Past as her skin is less pale. What many notice is that there’s no green infinity sign carved into her armor in The Past, but she instead wears an armband with the Infinight’s logo on it. (Just like Spectril!) 

Throughout the story, Luce and the others get along very well. Her voice is still ‘honeyed yet haunting’, but her interactions with the Infinights are full of smiles and jokes. Luce cracks a few herself, leaving the threats to the enemies encountered in combat. 

This mode, even when played to 100%, does not address exactly why Luce left the Infinights. Theories have been made through dialogue left throughout both modes of the game, but there has been no official response from the developers. Tales From the Stinky Dragon often prides itself on adding a bit of mystery to their games, with some questions getting answered while others are left up to the fans. 

The newest mystery they’ve unveiled is Grotethe, another RPG game in the works. Through released screenshots, it’s clear that the game uses the same base as Infinights. The combat and dialogue systems are the same, along with the game’s basic premise. However, one question that has been raised is how the story modes work. Will Grotethe have only a story-driven mode, only open-world, or will it include both? None of the released content points to any of these options. 

On a similar note, it is also clear that Grotethe takes is set in an entirely different place. The technology and locations (and even the appearance of one of the main characters!) that can be seen in different screenshots are causing speculation amongst fans. People wonder whether the two games are related or not and, if they are, how? No voice clips for any of the characters have been released yet, but fans hope that the voices of the main characters will aid them in this quest for answers. 

Until then, everyone continues to enjoy the stunning game that is Infinights. 

This project, with all visual details compiled on one Adobe Illustrator document entitled 'rot' because I failed to spell 'rpg' started on Tuesday, January 14th. Through various sessions of various lengths and occasional mouse usage, it has finally been completed. I now hate rectangles and squares. 

Various parts of the artwork should be recognizable to other games of a similar style. When I went looking for sprite bases when this project first started, I landed on a base sprite for Omori. I have never played Omori. Along with that, the way the combat screen looks is taken from Deltarune (which I have played) and the shop screen has influences from it. 

And it should be known that most things made in this work I had a trace (with pixels) from a random internet image. That dragon was NOT freehand, nor was that train, the map and pretty much everything from the shop screen (though, the shopkeeper whose name I cannot remember was drawn from a sketch I made). All text except title text (Infinights, Grotethe, Tales From the Stinky Dragon) is actual type, only the title text I drew (with a reference).

My school shouldn’t have allowed me to have an Adobe account or a teacher/class to teach me graphic design. I am using it for evil.

Sprite sheet:

The state my school computer's desktop was left in. Just because I think it's funny.

[applestorms]

on another note. it genuinely kinda surprises me how many people interpret ivan to be the type of person to Repress and Deny his feelings when, from all the evidence we actually have, he actually seems to be quite open about it?

he does do the dumb stare and watch from afar thing that till does with mizi, yeah, but even there i don’t know if i would necessarily interpret that as ivan like. pushing his feelings away. compare the difference between how till and ivan are framed in these two shots:

in till's, we are pushed way farther back, seeing his full face and a good deal of his body as he slouches back. the colors are bright, fitting in with most of the happier mizisua angst memories, and you can read till's expression pretty clearly, even with his face beaten up. it's cute and mostly innocent, the kind of thing that makes you want to gently push him out from behind the wall to watch him stutter and get all embarrassed but reach out and play with his friends.

in ivan's... jesus. i mean, he looks like a freak (affectionate). you can't read his expression, despite the fact that we are zoomed in much more closely, only really seeing his eye as the placement of his hand covers his mouth. there is very little body language to convey the same type of sweet, childhood Yearning that till has in his staring shot. instead, for ivan, it all comes down to the Eye, how intently he stares as he watches till and mizi. it almost doesn't even feel like he wants to join in at that moment, or not yet, like watching alone is enough to feed the starvation.

don't get me wrong, there's still plenty of Yearning and Angst in that boy-- round 3 alone is enough to demonstrate that. but what i think people sometimes forget to account for is the fact that ivan acts like that specifically because he has already been rejected.

up until [whenever this moment happens in the timeline] ivan seemingly has absolutely no qualms about getting all up close and personal with till. we see this in plenty of the round 6 flashbacks:

he is plenty comfortable getting all up in till's personal space, whether it be to beat him up or just exist near him.

i also like how in this shot (below) we can see him specifically stand up and move seats, just so that he can bother till during lunch and have his little vampire weirdo moment (aww).

ivan's behavior only really shifts after till has already rejected him-- which, i'd also like to note, seems to genuinely catch ivan off guard. perhaps he genuinely didn't even consider the possibility that till would ever push him away?? i guess it's hard to know the specifics of what he was feeling or thinking in that exact moment, but at the very least this speaks to the ease with which they existed around each other previously.

thus: ivan doesn't begin with the belief that till could never love him. he only starts to doubt whether or not his feelings are requited after he has already been rejected, after he pushed too hard and too quick.

after the failed meteor shower date, his affections become a lot more subtle-- sneaking around to take care of till when he needs it, but only when his eyes are closed. the love and obsession and watchfulness is all still there, but he takes more care to hide it better now. until... well, y'know.

he lets the selfishness win. :]

[qi-mera]

"King Magnifico and Queen Amaya could have been Disney's first evil power couple!"

Excuse you,

[rystiel]

changed it a bit so if u saw this before no u didn’t

[temporary-tats]

A soft-bees ko-fi roulette request for @notoftheskaal! Happy (belated) birthday my friend! Thank you very much for the support <3

(My links and my ko-fi, should you wish!)

[syluses]

Whenever i learn zayne + xavier’s characters i really wanna do a multi LI fic in an apocalypse! au 😖

imagine the group of them acting as saviors, swooping mc up or meeting her in some other similar, very power-imbalanced way while she’s braving the dystopian world alone. maybe she starts off with her gege caleb; maybe she starts off with a catch-22-like sylus as her mentor/protector; but i especially like the idea of her just being taken under their collective wing, and then their group slowly crumbles apart when they realize they’re really really into this cute new addition to their gritty, blood-soaked lives— yet they’re not particularly comfy with the idea of the other guys capturing her full loyalty and affection before one claims it for himself.

Whenever HWWIW is complete (or even before, lol, it depends) i think i want to start a nice lil series like this hehe 👀

[comradesummers]

btvs season 7 episode 16 storyteller my beloved! episodes that start out really fun and zany but end up being surprisingly sad and poignant my beloved! reflections on the act of narration, on who is telling the story and what their perspective is my beloved! buffy being the badass speech giving girlboss general for most of the episode (because that's how andrew sees her) but then actually admitting how desperate and vulnerable she is to andrew of all people because she knows no one will believe him if he tells them about it my beloved! buffy refusing to let andrew deflect the guilt of murdering jonathan because if there's one thing buffy "you have a choice, you don't have a good choice but you have a choice!" summers can't stand it's people who refuse to take responsibility for their actions my beloved! andrew actually admitting that he murdered jonathan my beloved! the episode ending on andrew not being able to narrate to the camera anymore because he knows there's nothing he can say that can make it better my beloved!

season 7 mostly sucks but when it hits it hits okay

[murmurmurl]

Many, many months have passed since I initially wanted to do this but they are here.. I haven't forgotten..... second pjsk oc unit.. space edition...

[made-my-peace-with-all-the-bad]

It had been a week. A week since the crash. A week since Darry’s world fell apart. It had been a week and Darry hadn’t even let himself cry yet. How could he? He had too much to do. He had to transfer to mortgage to his name, he had to make sure he got a job, he had to drop out of school, he had to get custody of his brothers. Shit. Custody. That was the hardest one. The social worker stopped by today to let him know he’d been granted temporary custody of his brothers as well as to give him a huge stack of paperwork he needed to do to apply for permanent custody.

Darry ran a hand through his hair and tried to quiet his mind for a moment. First things first, he needed to check on his brothers. He knew they would be in his room cause the three of them had been sharing his queen bed for the last week. They needed the comfort of knowing the others were close and safe. So Darry twisted the handle to his room and saw both his younger brothers curled into each other on his bed.

Darry felt a wave of softness hit him as he watched the gentle rise and fall of his brothers’ bodies as they slept. Lord, they looked so peaceful and so young like this. That thought felt like a stab through his heart as it hit him that mama and dad would never get to see them like this again. He forced out a shaky breath and kissed the side of Ponyboy’s head and rubbed Soda’s shoulder before creeping back out and quietly shutting the door.

He longed to join them in sleep. He wanted to slide into the bed and wrap an arm around each brother and hold them close and protect them from the world, but he couldn’t. So he would settle for doing everything he could to keep them close to him and keep them safe. He would give up anything and everything and he would work to the ends of the earth to keep his brothers warm and fed. Because that’s what you do when you love someone, you do whatever it takes.

That’s how Darry found himself sitting at his kitchen table at midnight sorting through piles of paperwork. Custody came first, that was most important. It was also going to take the most time and would be the hardest fight. Not for Soda, they had the same blood. But Ponyboy was another story. Darry had to prove that he was not only fine to care for him, but he was the best. He had to show that even though the same DNA wasn’t in them, even though their blood was from two different parents, they were brothers. He needed to prove that it would be best for his baby brother to stay with him instead of being taken away.

Just the thought of Ponyboy ending up back in the system made Darry’s stomach roll. That boy deserved to be kept safe and loved more than most. Him and Soda deserved to be cared for and with someone who loved them more than any other people in the world. Darry knew he might not be the best person but damn it the selfish part of him needed to keep them cause if he’s being honest, he doesn’t know what the hell he’d do without them.

Shit. What would he do if the state didn’t let him keep his brothers? What would he do if they took them to a boys home? What if he couldn’t get a good enough job and his boys went hungry? What if he wasn’t good enough to take care of them? What would mama and dad say? Would they be disappointed in him? Would they hate him if he ever did wrong by his boys? God, how could he ever even try to be even half as good as they were?

He couldn’t. That was the truth, plain and simple. He would never be good enough to try and come anywhere near close to filling his parents’ shoes. Glory they’d only been gone a week and he already felt so lost. He didn’t know what to do. He looked for them every time he felt unsure and all that he found was empty space and reminders of the loss.

He wanted them back. He still needed them. He was scared.

That was the first time he’d let himself admit that. Darry felt his fingers begin to tremble and he felt his nose start to burn with the sensation he knew meant tears would follow. Fuck. He shouldn’t do this. He can’t do this. He can’t cry now. He still has so much to do. Darry tried to squeeze his eyes shut and force the tears away as he picked up the pen he’d dropped and tried to start filling out the paperwork again.

He thought he’d be fine. Then he got to the bottom of the first custody form and it asked him to sign his name. The moment he finished the “s”, he felt his eyes burn again. This time, he put down the bend and just buried his face in his hands, unable to hold back the tears this time. His vision blurred and his body ached as he tried to keep himself together. He couldn’t fall apart. Not now. Not when he still had so much to do.

But the tears fell anyway. They felt like fire across his cheeks. He felt his chest tighten and his breaths quicken. He missed them. He missed his mama. He missed his dad. He needed them right now more than he ever had before. He needed them. He needed his brothers. He needed Paul. God, he just needed someone. Someone to hold him up and hug him tight and promise him that everything would be ok. He needed to not be strong for just a minute. He wanted to be held. But there was no one here to hold him anymore. Glory, the things he’d do for just one more hug from his mama or pat on the back from his dad.

But he was alone. It was past midnight and Darry was sitting at the kitchen table in the dim light crying. He needed to, a small part of him knew that, but he also knew that he needed to be strong now. Mama and dad weren’t here to take care of them now. He had to be the protector. He had to be the provider. It was his job now and that thought alone paralyzed him with fear cause how the hell was he, a kid hardly out of his teenage years, supposed to raise his brothers?

He couldn’t dwell on that thought too long because he was snapped back to reality when he heard the horrifying scream of Ponyboy waking up from a nightmare. Shit. He tried his best to wipe the remaining tears from his face and prayed that it would be dark enough that neither of his brothers could see. In less than a minute, he was up and practically sprinting to his room to try and comfort his baby brother because that was his job now. He was now the one who needed to hold his shaking brother as he choked out sobs while looking so out of it.

Right. His job. Another reminder that his parents were gone. Another reminder that he couldn’t fall apart anymore. He was the strongest now. He was the biggest. He was the protector. He couldn’t be just Darry anymore. He couldn’t just be the fun big brother who flung a brother over his shoulder or ruffled his younger brothers hair or always complained about bein on a team with his baby brother anymore. He needed be the grown up. He had to be like his dad. Darrel didn’t fall to pieces. Darrel fixed things. Darrel provided and did everything he could to protect his family. He needed to be Darrel now.